Original subtitles

MEDUSA distribution

Augusto caminito pose

Boarding for flight 052 is ending.

Sergio Corbucci Movie

I repeat.

Landing ends on flight 052 to Genoa.

Exit number 4.

Hello.

Escort Department dignitaries?

Excellent!

Where is this model respecting confidentiality ..

... which should be at the airport exactly at 1 1?

What?.. What do you mean detained?

I paid for it in advance, she is mine! .. Excuse me, who am I talking to?

Police Major Giannelly?

Where will i find now another attendant?

At night, wherever they went but not in the afternoon.

Fuck! .. Here she is ... Found!

We were in Cortina we were in Monte Carlo, ..

... we were in Portofino, what else to do for you?

Look look into our eyes.

We are your brothers: Costantino, Girello and Lombo.

At night, you are our flesh and blood ... Where else to take you?

- In Rimini. - In Rimini ???

To this hot spot!

The night do you want some coffee

Rimini, Rimini !!!

Laura Antonelli,

Elvira Andrei,

Eleanor Brilliadori,

Jerry Kala

Serena Grandi,

Maurizio Miqueli,

Libya Romano

and Andrea Ronkato in film

"RIMINI, RIMINI"

with the participation of Paolo Bonachelli

Script writers:

Mario Amendola, Bruno Corbucci and Sergio Corbucci

Comedian, artist, entertainer.

The animator ... is free ...

Catania ... We are from Catania.

It's okay ... Aufvidzane.

Arividerche!

Executive producer Francesco Casati

Theater, big and small, if desired, clowns.

Theatro actor.

Director - Sergio Corbucci

Bitte.

Comedian, private parties ... Guten Tag.

Hey.

Bitte, dunke sean, and tuttalor.

Don’t you sell half a serving?

Look over there, Liliana.

These great athletes pretend that they play the ball ..

... but they think about something completely different.

... nice to be aware of yourself minerals.

Yes? .. And who are they? .. Work force?

We women are polygamous My joy.

Our erotic potential is higher than men.

Talked about it even Moravia in the Panorama.

Following the reasoning of your Moravia, should i always be ready?

And run headlong for the first comer.

No!.. For the first one I like.

Liliana, you are 12 years old unfaithful husband ..

... and now you need to shake yourself.

I know what you want.

Simone, it’s not so easy ... Talking is always easier.

You know, I have never done it.

It’s not at all difficult ... Aren't you here for this?

If you don’t want to do this for your own sake, do for your ex-husband!

Take revenge on him! .. Look who's coming ... Max.

If Prever quotes it, then he likes you.

Max!

I understand everything, you talked about me all sorts of nasty things, admit it!

No, no, I just warned her otvtoy poetic delight.

As Prever says: poetry has not yet killed a single woman!

Yes, but how many mothers you made! ..

- Meet, this is Liliana. - Maximilian Poncielli.

- Very nice. - For friends - Max!

- Liliana Corsi. “Liliana, what a beautiful name! ..”

Liliana, like a song, do you hear? .. Lillian!

It suits you very much ... Why haven't I seen you before?

“I arrived last night.” - Yes, to visit me ...

Liliana arrived in Rimini have some fun.

“Simone, we wanted to swim.” - Yes, let's go.

There is nothing like swimming if you want to swim!

I would love to make you company, but I just ate.

Liliana, can I call you and invite for a walk.

Uno promenade ... Do you mind

Good!.. Goodbye!

I'm sorry ... I broke your castle.

At his age already do not build sand castles ...

- Right, Pio? - Yes mom.

Don't yell at him he is still a child!

Yes baby! ..

- Will you go swimming with us? - No I do not want to.

RIMINI

Attention greetings.

Train from U dine and Trieste, ..

... arriving on schedule at 21-25, ..

... is 15 minutes late.

Welcome, Signor Praetor ... Are you already on vacation?

Yes ... Republic, please ... In U dine, I have already seized these publications!

Some obscenities and scandals!

Take them off the counter or I will order to close your kiosk !!

- But only these are in demand! - I know...

But you still illegally sell Depraved pictures for onanists!

Take your "Republic" ... Taxi!

- Free? - Yes.

- How much do you want to the Karim Hotel? - Far away! .. 20 thousand without a counter.

Without a counter.

I'm praetor, and you want to make me crime accomplice.

There is a counter work on the counter!

Take your suitcase ... And faster.

Faster!.. Where are you?

Go... How many kilometers?

Hello Hello!.. Yes, I’ve arrived.

Hotel "Karim"

Here... How much do I owe?

- 34 thousand. - How is 34?

By the counter ... You yourself wanted to.

Signor Praetor, you are punctual as always.

- Francesco! - Hello, Signora Lydia.

- How was the ride? “Francesco, bring the suitcases.”

Disgusting!

Trains are always late, I even wrote a letter to the Evening Courier.

- Do I have the same number? - Yes!

The same service? .. Beach? .. Same price?

As for the price ... the price is the same!

- I ask you to. - Thanks.

- Sit at the same table. - Good afternoon, everyone.

Our dear signor praetor.

Feruzzi did you decide to commit suicide?

Why?

Salt!.. This is a new killer on the table! ..

- And besides, a careless diet. - This is white rice!

Exactly... That is carbohydrates.

With meat proteins who are you eating now ..

... you get an explosive mixture.

My long-awaited warning ... Happy holidays.

- I hope to survive. - There is no hope.

How are you?.. Signora.

I read about your last case.

You made close because of the scandal, one theater ...

Theatre?

Disgusting cabaret in which one stripper was performing.

I don’t even remember her name in my opinion, Ramona.

Do not you think, were you too harsh

No, Marchetti, and you, as a former judge, must understand this perfectly.

The number of this ... Signorina, was disgusting.

What's the number?.. Did you see him?

No... But I sent Carabinieri there.

From their report, I found out ..

... that this shameless finished her speech ..

... stuffing the bottle into the ppt ... Well ... I think you get where.

How not to understand?

- ... Try it. - Signor praetor!

No, you misunderstood.

Hello, you are a Filipino servant, I understand ... Listen to this.

You have to say engineer Pederchini, ..

... that he arrived at the Grand Hotel Rimini Gianni Bozzi, Dr. Gianni Bozzi.

Well done!

With wife ... This is very important, do not forget.

Goodbye.

- How do you like me? “You look like Dracula's mistress!”

Stop, take off this sarcophagus!

You yourself said that I should not attract attention.

Yes, but in this form you will not be noticed only in the Adams family.

Italians are leaders in the fashion world, What are you dressed up for?

Let's pick something brighter.

Girl!.. Ask for a branded item.

Found !!! .. Here ... In my opinion, what you need.

Nothing like this... This is some kind of bag, a hoodie ...

- It sucks. - What kind of jargon?

This is a modern expression, and be modern.

Signorina, help us, as I understand it, we have taste problems!

Please straighten her hair, ..

... otherwise it seems as if she came on a moped.

Nightmare.

Hello?

Hi Uchcha, this is your hubby ... Hello honey.

Listen, we are already here I'll see him soon.

You do not believe me?

This time with Ferrarino everything will work out.

What?.. Have you already ordered Testarosso?

And if you trusted me, Would you also buy Michele Alboreto?

Uchcha, it seems to me ... You are angry?

No, I’m angry because you as always, don't give a damn.

Stop, Uchcha! .. Go to hell: both you and Alboreto.

Night, Night, it's already an hour will you get up

I want to die, die ... I would like to sleep forever.

- We even found you a musician! “Listen to how he plays well.”

What was it?

Tell your girello do you have a stomach ache?

This is probably escalopes.

When a woman, moreover, have a sister, digestive problems, ..

...it means, that she is missing something.

Gustavo, Gustavo, take me to you !!!

It's useless!

Gustavo left in her unfulfilled desire.

An irreplaceable void.

Come on, stop playing ... Can't you see what she doesn't like?

Go away.

“Maybe something else?” - Get out!

“Lombo? .. Girello?” - What, Costati?

Brothers, our duty fill this void.

Our Night must laugh again ... Whatever it costs us.

Gustavo, Gustavo, I want to Gustavo, I want to die, die.

Whose car is it?.. No parking in the forest.

Where is the master?

This is a trap for hares.

You have to be careful there are many traps in the forest.

- This is your car? - Yes, why?

Take her away immediately ... No Parking.

I can not, I take sun baths.

You violate decency.

Come down now, in the name of the law, and help me get out of here.

I demand!

Keep pull the rope.

“You didn't hurt anything?” - Still asks ...

There is nothing... Almost nothing.

- Do I go down? - What?

No, it can not be... Cat ... cat.

Mom!

Well, a little closer do not move.

Ok turn around turn around yet.

Done.

Look, this is Conan ... Bodybuilder ... He has the best body on the Adriatic.

Desperate to learn how to ride on the surf, but it’s unlikely to succeed.

What a good moment.

“What are you up to?” - Jump, come on, jump.

- What for? - jump!

- Here? - Yes.

What are you doing?.. You will run into him!

I'm doing everything right.

Oh no...

Abnormal.

This is my girlfriend!.. Help her.

- Yes. - Mamma Miya, how unlucky you are!

Get out!

Leg, she kicked poor thing ...

- True? - Yes, yes, a little.

It's all my fault ... Sorry Liliana!

“So you are the famous Liliana?” “Remember, I told you about her?”

Yes? .. Have you already talked about me? .. Well done.

Done.

After that he immediately will come to consciousness!

Who?.. Who is it?

Go ahead! .. Please ... Where am I? .. Where am I?

In K.G.B.

- Espionage? - No!..

The KGB is the Regional State Hospital.

You are at the local hospital!

- In the hospital? - Yes ... you've been here for two hours ...

Shock state what happened to you?

- Who is it? - No, no, it's a sister.

- My? “No, nun.”

- From Monza? - No, from All Saints.

Go, sister, go.

Well, tell me What happened to you?

- What is it? - Nothing ... So what happened?

- With whom? - With you.

With me?.. I am ashamed.

- Boldly! - I ... I was there.

- Where? - In the woods.

- In the woods! - Yes...

You know how is it in the forest?

But ... exactly when I was there, puff!

And I had a sunstroke and I...

- Sunstroke in the forest? - I fell.

“But there is a shadow everywhere!” - Shadow strike!

- Shadow strike! - This is typical of Romagna, right?

These shadow blows are very dangerous.

- Are you joking! - No.

I read in your docs, what are you praetor ..

... you must tell me the truth!

So tell me What happened to you!

- I ... will I sit down? - Sure.

Thanks... Doctor, I will tell you the truth.

I have, I had no sunstroke.

I fainted because I had a vision.

Unearthly! .. Meeting with an alien? ..

- What was he like? - He was very beautiful!

“Have you seen him from afar?” - No no!!!

He was very close, right here, face to face, directly opposite.

“And what did he look like?” - It was a cat!

- Siamese or Persian? - No, he was!

- Sorry, curly, black cat. - A black, curly cat? ..

- With human eyes? “No! .. He had no eyes!”

Black, curly, without eyes? .. I do not understand.

Excuse me, I am still impressed.

Sorry to be honest this word is "cat" ..

... but I still have to tell you everything.

Can I talk bluntly?

Talk to me, as with your confessor!

So, this cat! ..

... was not an independent being, it was an accessory on a naked woman.

- Naked? - Completely naked ...

And this cat! ... Curly! .. Hairy!

Excuse me.

I saw her and then fainted once.

Lose consciousness because of a naked woman?

Wow.

You think so, because you ... you don’t know what happened to me.

Doctor, I have to tell you ..

... that I have 25 years nothing comes out.

- Such a constipation? - No, what constipation ...

I sometimes do not have time to run away.

And once, in the midst of a court hearing ..

... there was a real disaster!

“But here is different.” - And what?

- I have no orgasm. - Amazing! .. Never?

Never! .. Not once! .. Generally! .. Generally never!

No! .. Sorry, only once, in childhood,..

... while reading the book "Heart".

The "heart" of De Amicis?

Episode about a young teacher with a cat, no!

With a red pen!

She was there this teacher with a cat! ..

Excuse me.

And with this teacher ... I experienced a real orgasm ..

... with a teacher with a black cat, no! .. With red ..!

Now I am absolutely calm.

If you don't mind, I want so you let me go.

- But we did not agree on the cat! “No! .. Not that!”

- Good good! - Let me go!

Do not get angry!.. Sign here.

- Name and surname. - Name and surname.

“And I will let you go.” - Done!

It's mine... My documents.

Name and surname ... Thank you very much.

- Happily! - Goodbye.

- What is your name? - Gildo Manelli.

But you wrote a cat !!!

Excuse me.

- How cute here! - True?

- Ask! - Thanks!

- Beautiful gym! - My little kingdom ...

I do not invite anyone here ... But since you and I are colleagues.

We?.. Colleagues?

Simone said that you and I have the same job.

She said, What am I interested in bodybuilding?

Yeah that you walk to the gym in Milan ..

... and that you are special in bodybuilding.

- See what muscles? - Congratulations!

- Which muscle do you like more? - I do not know.

- Would you like to have a look? - No, let's not rush.

- It's deltoid, what do you say? - Deltoid, deltoid ...

Look, the muscles are beautiful, when they are well pumped up!

- Do not touch! - No?

I'm in a pose ... Look into my eyes!..

- What do you see? - What should I see?

C'mon, speak!.. Maybe steroids?

- Yes. - No!..

You are mistaken I'm not a drug addict! ..

Undress!

- So right away? - I want to see.

But I... I'm so ... not used to it!

- Undress, stop breaking. - And no entry?

Why is this still?

Turn around

You are too constrained and clamped.

Now I will warm you up!

“Have you been doing this for a long time?” “Yes ... Four or five months.”

While my husband was hiding from justice.

“Did you do it together?” - Sure!

And I'm always alone ... So high.

So you are a real egoist.

Maybe we’ll try some pose? .. How much do you know?

- Three, four, traditional ... - But only?

My husband did not have much imagination.

Do you know more?

- Eighty-five - ninety! - Wow! .. Really?

I'm not an amateur, I'm a professional! .. Let's try it.

- Take a position! - Where is "here?

Spread your legs.

Right here?.. With this thing?

Yes, you do not know how! .. And Simone said you were a master!

Girlfriends are always exaggerating.

I don’t know how you do it, I’m used to it the old fashioned way.

Can't you start in bed?

In the bed?.. And what to do there?

- And what to do on this contraption? - Bodybuilding.

Bodybuilding?

What's so funny?

- Sorry, I misunderstood you. “What did you misunderstand?”

You see I never went to the gym ..

... and gymnastics doesn't interest me!

And the muscles disgust me!

- Why did you come? - To make love.

With whom? .. With me? .. Why didn’t you say right away?

Do you want to go to bed? .. Yeah right now!

Excuse me, I'm probably an amateur.

Explain to me as a professional, what are you doing?

I put on gloves and a protective shirt.

This is for you... And no kisses on the lips.

You make love in such equipment?

With all the existing lethal illnesses I would also wear a spacesuit.

Why are you getting dressed?

- Where are you going? “I'm leaving! .. Immediately!”

- You feel bad? - No, on the contrary, everything is fine!

This is bad for you very bad!

And in your eyes I really I see steroids, and not only there!

You have them here in the brain, and it is visible!

How did you determine?

- Carlo! - What?

That you invited Signora Bozzi with his wife?

Yes, there is one thing.

Your usual business? .. Sorry, dear.

- It cradles me, I can’t! - Quietly! .. And then they will immediately guess.

- Shoes! - What are the shoes?

“You have to take them off!” - We just bought them?

Don't you know What do yachts go barefoot?

Without heels my ass is failing!

I hope you do not break the bottom of the yacht ... Go on.

- And you will not shoot? “Can't you see I'm in moccasins?”

You finally arrived! .. Signora Bozzi?

- Very nice! - You can wear shoes! ..

I redo the deck every half year!

- Thanks!! - How are you?

- This is my wife, Uchcha. - Really a wife?

Wife, wife! .. Here are the rings.

Carlo will you introduce us

My sister Rita Countess Francalancha.

- Good afternoon! - Signora Bozzi.

- I am glad. - Well.

“How is your husband doing?” - Do you know him?

Of course I saw his photograph, seems to be in Capital.

- Maybe. - No, no, in the Express! ..

In between customers I always...

- You feel bad? - She got a little sickness.

- Want to sit down? - Painfully!

Take a look ... He just got caught!

- How lovely! - Disgusting.

Just a miracle.

How nice to feel the last flinching defenseless creatures!

Amazing!

“Are you still feeling bad?” - No...

My wife can't see how animals die.

This is contrary to its principles.

“She's a Buddhist ?!” - No, about...!

... just a humanist!

I have not shown my yacht yet not a single humanist.

Will you allow

Of course, Uchcha, go ... Look at the yacht!

Ask.

- Dr. Bozzi? - Countess!

I want to introduce our friends to you: lord and lord Donadoni.

Very nice.

Dr. Gianni Bozzi ... Business partner Carlo.

Clear.

“Anything to drink, dear?” - Let's go to.

Yes with pleasure!

Doctor, do you want to strengthen contact with Signor Pederchini?

Yes...

I got it, as soon as I saw your wife!

How?

What’s on her forehead? "import Export" ?

Don’t worry, Signor Bozzi, nothing wrong,..

... I went through this myself.

Gone what?

Everyone knows that Pederchini not indifferent to other people's wives.

To others maybe but not mine!

Signor Donadoni, are you betting questioned my decency ?!

- And .. then you manage to make a deal? - W is given, succeeds.

- Are you sure? “Yes ... It's a whole ritual.”

- Really? - Yes.

Tell me.

At a certain hour, at a favorable moment ...

... the engineer will not have Deer grappa, his beloved.

Then he will ask you to buy her and will be left alone with your wife.

“Understood, deer grappa?” - Deer grappa.

- It is this one. - Yes.

I’ll buy him Elk too, and Kozlinu, what difference does it make to me!

- Do you have experience? - Yes.

This is a room for confidential meetings.

- Let's move on? - Thanks.

- Here, here. - Sorry, what are you doing?

I didn’t want to push you.

This is so that you do not fall, but if you don’t want to ...

No, no, go on, it doesn’t bother me at all.

- You are very pretty! - You too!

You have not told me your name yet?

My name is Marisa Marise Dae Tre Fontane.

So are you a marquise? .. Did your husband tell you about that businessman?

Gianni said that I should be nice.

I know, that I'm a little weird.

Then if all three of us agree ...

- Now three? “Me, you and your husband.”

Carlo!

I ordered from Truchido for nine, time to go!

Do you know Truchido?

It seems in such restaurants fed with all sorts of nastiness.

But then you go there, and eat this muck.

Exactly... Are you with us

Of course, Countess, I love disgusting cuisine.

So, we will be served: ..

... broth from a killer, pasta from scum, roast from scavenger, ..

... fish from a pervert, the skin of a dolphin ...

It...

- Like a pig with mussels? - Exactly!

- Yes? - Then I still strudel from a maniac.

- A bit of everything! - Perfectly!

More pepper mostly on the head.

There is nothing better than disgusting dishes.

With pepper, this is too much! .. And with a head too!

As always, fish.

Caught in Rimini a real delicacy!

From our sea very tasty!

Give it a try!

- Thank you, but I don’t want something! - Do not break, try at least one!

“I completely forgot, but are you a humanist too?” “No, but I prefer a raid!”

Banzai!

- Martial arts? “I watched Karate Kid seven times.”

Don’t worry, for the sake of such a thing I can swallow even a shark, or octopus.

I'm not because of the fish ... He put his foot in me.

Take it easy, engineer Pederichi washes his feet!

Pepperini, I'm sorry that I tear you from this muck ..

... did you see my contract?

That 40 billion businessman between Nepal and Bangladesh.

Yes, but with branches in Sri Lanka, Laos and Accra.

Sure, the beginning was great ..

... if we continue to have mutual understanding, think that ...

Pederchini further will be even better!

Who are you, joker?

Pino Trikariko, theater actor, comedian, dreamer.

Come in!

How is the public? .. Hot?

- Say something. “You must tell us!”

Do you want, so we go crazy?

We have no more strength! .. You have to talk!

Do you want us to lose our appetite?

Hell!.. Shut up you!

- Shut up! - Stop it.

Okay, I’ll tell you!

It was like in the "Dynasty" ... When Ellen ...

“Isn't Helene in Dallas?” - Do not interrupt her!

Go on, Night.

When Helen realized your dream of love ...

... and decided to hold unforgettable days on a father-in-law boat.

- It was Senator Farla. “No, not him.”

Yes, shut up you! .. She finally spoke!

Night what happened on this damn boat?

Merciless wave, lightning, and in an instant it was all over.

My gustavo swallowed the sea creatures.

And I was petrified with horror like a nerd.

What did you do on this boat?

- Cariola. - Cariola?

Damn cariola, she ruined everything Damn it!..

“You shouldn't have done that!” “I said it was dangerous!”

Do not touch her!

When two love each other ..

... they have a reason to do cariola, that's all.

That's all.

Sorry, you will tell me when...

When that?

- When should I speak? - Yes, when you want.

Wondeful, Duncheon!

Very good!.. Lord ...

No!.. No no no no.

I see today we have a noble audience, hot, ..

... so I'll start with a pun.

It’s necessary to freeze something, to melt the ice.

Pun... freeze to melt the ice.

This is complete nonsense.

So you know ..

... why dwarfs never do not accept nudists in society?

Because they are curious stick your nose everywhere!

Since they are dwarfs, their nose is level ...

- When will the performance begin? - He's already coming.

There is another story ..

... a little fantastic about one worker from Turin.

I will tell her in the Turin dialect.

One worker from Turin is late to work and tells the boss: ..

"A dog bit me on the leg, and I went to get the vaccine. "

And the boss asks: ..

"In hospital?" , and he replies: "No, no, in the ass.

I do not see anything funny.

What's the point?

The boss meant the establishment, and the worker is part of the body.

That's the pun.

I've told, that the story is a little fantastic.

There is one more awesome ..

... sometimes I remember her and laugh even at night.

Very funny.

One Signor Meets a Friend to the cemeteries and asks: ..

"What happened?"

He replies: "I'm going to bury my wife.

Why is your whole face scratched? "

He says: "Because she did not want to die!"

The wife didn’t want, didn’t want to be buried ..

... because she was alive was completely against it.

The comic moment begins precisely from this: did not want to.

Not funny... You must make laugh.

I accept any criticism ..

... but you have to say what do you want to hear.

I tried enough ... Turning to the classics?

I have a rich repertoire ... Want King Lear?

Shakespeare is always Shakespeare.

I start: "Blow the winds, open the sky!"

- Where to blow? - Into the sky.

- Why blow? - This is Shakespeare.

- Sing if you can! .. There is an orchestra! - With pleasure, I give in to violence.

I think, the moment has come for a musical break!

I want to die!!!

No, no, I don’t know this part ..

... but I will find it and turn it on in your repertoire.

Maestro, do you know Champagne?

- Dee Francha? - Exactly.

- In what key? - F major.

Good.

We’ll drink champagne for our meeting, for you,..

... even if you went to another, ..

... champagne reminds rainy evening, back to the past again.

How did you recognize her son confused?

Champagne... In what sense, signorina?

Sing and don’t stop.

... For you, even though you went to another.

This is our song ... Mine and Gustavo.

Learned everything, sneak.

“I knew absolutely nothing.” - Sing, don't pretend to be an idiot.

Let's drink to a meeting ...

There are only two possibilities: either dance or sing.

But let me express pleasure in connection with ..

... that I see joy on your again the face that I became has become ...

Otalo is closer, sneak.

We will drink champagne for our meeting for you, even if you went to another.

“What is the name of this fool?” - Cariko, Scariko ...

“I see, Scariko.” “Let her entertain, he amused her.”

What a hard callus on your cheek!

- Too hot? - On the contrary, I do not have enough heat.

Me too, Signorina Bovi.

Call me Night.

- What are you doing? - Improvising!

You know, and you dance well scoundrel.

I know the dance lives in me I do not dance, I create.

Come on, I'll show you the gazebo.

- There is a gazebo here! .. Come on! - Here, here.

You see, Noche, I've always been located for love adventures.

I was born in a country house ... Everyone knows what happens there!

I know how the tarantula jumps how a donkey bites ..

... but cariola is the best !!!

For us, cariola is like a drug!

But it must be emphasized ..

... that constant touch to erogenous zones ...

...may cause to irreparable consequences.

Do not worry.

Say better do you like this cariola

Crazy! .. In my opinion, it surpasses the Kama Sutra!

After that tragedy, I’m still I didn’t feel such excitement!

I feel like bride before the wedding!

Was it a scene from the movie? .. I have no idea.

And I could play a priest, but I do not have enough connections.

Say what you want tell your night!

Do you want to work in a movie? on television, in the theater, ..

... sing in La Scala?

- You will sing in La Scala! - Enough! .. Enough, Night!

You can't do this to me!

Behind the mask of the actor a man is hiding !!! ..

- At night, do not deceive me. “I was sincere.”

I have 92 meat processing plants, ..

... four theaters in Italy, five in France ..

... Madison Garden, I don’t know where to put it.

Madison Square Garden?! .. Where does Frank sing?

- Do you want to sing there? “At night, don't say that! ..”

Is that really true?

After Cariola Woman can't lie to her man.

I love you, Night! .. From the minute I saw it!

- From the evening? - It doesn’t matter! .. And the television?

- Four! - TV?

- The channel! - I love you so much!

- Prove it! - Will you allow it?

Cariola !!! .. In October we are in Sistine!

In January at the Manzoni Theater! .. In April in Madison!

- And when to relax? - No rest!

Holidays in June, closer to Hollywood! .. How are you doing with movie theaters?

We have 15 of them ... Everything for Gustavo.

How he loved the movie!

Forget Gustavo, don’t think of him, he is no more !!!

Nooo !!!! .. Gustavo !!!

Whore!.. What are you doing here ... Cariola? ..

- So do you remember your Gustavo? !!! - I thought you were dead !!

Get out of here, trash! .. I have been sailing for 15 days!

- My admiration ... What did you see? - And what do you want? ..

Who are you? .. Who? .. Say it or not?

- No, please, don’t! - Who knows you? ..

So you drown !! .. Bowie! .. Where are you?

Violence is the life of Gustavo! .. And I? .. What will happen to me?

I'll go to sleep at the hotel ... On a yacht, I feel dizzy.

This whiskey turned your head ... The yacht has nothing to do with it.

And you still drink? .. You drank almost nothing.

“We are here for this!” - I didn’t drink alcohol at all!

“Good night, Countess.” - Same to you.

- Signora, all the best! - Bye, honey!

How did I do it?

Pederchini! .. The moon today is like in Brunei!

We’ll talk about Brunei later.

I'll go I'll put on something more suitable.

It seems soon.

Yes darling, a little later you will cheat on me.

Listen, If you do not want to...

How don't I want this? .. I don’t want to?

I want, I want! .. You must!

We are here ...

Okay.

Maybe then, when we get things done, let's go on a trip with you.

What do you say with five billion can I relax?

- Yes... “I'll take you to Capri!”

No, not in Capri! .. Now everyone goes there!

To Venice! .. Have you been to Venice?

How many channels are there! .. More than Berlusconi!

Listen, you kiss me before ...

Sure.

Here are the newlyweds in love and that is great!

I wanted to treat you with grappa but grappa ...

- ... It's over! - Well done, I guessed!

Listen Bozzi, could you please buy one bottle of deer grappa?

- It’s Deer? - Deer.

Okay, I go back and forth well i went ...

Do not hurry.

Darling if I linger don’t worry, you are in good hands.

Well, I have gone.

Oh yes i leave here bag with a contract ..

... when I get back with grappa, maybe sign it ...

- Then. - Then, then.

I realized then!

“Don't worry, Marcos!” - Then.

Hell, can you just say that?

Finally, we were left alone ... We can get to know each other better ...

“Did something happen? .. are you trembling?” “No, it's just cold here!”

True cool let's go inside?

It’s warmer and more intimate! .. More intimate !!

Please give grappa.

- No, a bottle. “Are you from Pederchini?”

- How do you know?! - Here is his yacht .. He loves grappa!

- A deer? - Exactly.

He has large reserves: for himself, for friends and for wives of friends.

- How many? - Eighteen thousand.

Keep the change.

- At the cottage ... Everything will be fine. - Spit it out.

Marisa! .. Marisa! .. Where are you going?

- Vile pig! - What happened?

He is a maniac, at first he eats alive octopus, then raw fish ...

What is this about? .. The Japanese also eat raw fish, sushi!

Yes, but the Japanese don't go crazy over juventus!

Because of Juventus?

He eats live octopuses and rooting for Juventus !!!

OK, OK, calm down! .. I understood!

He is for Juventos! .. What do you care?

How is it, what?

He wanted me to scream: "Go Juventus, Down with Roma!"

So did you say that? .. Did you say so?

- I AM? - You said?

I weighed him two bream, from which he cannot come to his senses !!

So I scream "down with Roma"!

So wait, calm down, did you slap an engineer Pederchini?

Yes, two!

And then she started screaming: "Go ahead, Romaaa!" , ..

... because Roma is not only the command of my heart ..

... but also my love, my passion!

Roma !!!

And you ripped off the case five billion because of Roma?

I sacrificed it for the sake of great sports passion!

Now I will sacrifice you I’ll fry alive!

Football hit her in the head!

You get me a kick in the ass, ..

... if you don’t go work out its 5 million!

Nerd! .. Get back on the yacht !!

No!.. Fidelity is not for sale !!!

- Ten millions! - No!!!

- Fifteen. - No!

OK I understood.

“What? .. What do you want to do?” - To commit suicide ...

“What else can I do?” - Stop joking!

To joke?.. I am a business man!

Rather, I strive to become one ... But I'm tired.

I can not conclude a single deals, what can I do? ..

- Kill yourself! - No! .. Please, come down! ..

Are you crazy?

Let's talk!.. Do not exaggerate!..

- Do not scare me, please! - Who is exaggerating?

If I don’t do it, banks will take care of this, ..

... tenants, wives, Ferrari, together.

I'm sorry because this is the case could fix everything.

Well done.

So I'll die singing: "Thanks, Roma" ...

No, stop, don't jump! .. I beg you! .. I ask!

Leave me alone.

Get dressed ... I can’t look at you.

Ok, ok, I'm coming ... Where to?

To Pederchini.

Look ... This is the check you gave me.

- What are you doing? - I do not need him!

Because I'm Marise de Tre Fontane devoted fan of Roma!

I am disgusted to take money for I will scream "Forward Juventus" !!!

What have you come to it's like an oath!

Do not exaggerate.

You know what I'll tell you? .. You're right, I'm really a nerd.

Well, Go Forward Juventus Down ...

No no!

Say nothing more not necessary!

For many years I have been waiting for a woman which could for the sake of passion ..

... even for sports, make any sacrifice.

I feel, I already love her.

Marizuccia! .. Excuse me.

I would like to know you better Wait!..

- Do not say no. “Actually, I came to say yes.”

Tell me when the time is right when we are away, away from everyone.

My lovely, do you know itaka

Ita what?

Uchcha? .. Uchcha, my love! .. I woke you up?

Listen, I'm sorry ... Everything is good?

Everything is good... This time the job is done.

Listen about the Ferrari, buy two Testarosses!

Alone in the morning another for the evening.

Book apartments on Wall Otrit, I’ll soon build a house and buy a shop.

Oh God, Lord! .. Marisa!

Pederchini! .. Pederchini! .. Marisa!

Gianni! .. Gianni! .. Carlo will take me ...

What is that place called?

“Ithaca, my love.” - To Ithaca!

- And my contract? - The contract? .. Here it is! .. Here!

Oh my God, you hit him in the head!

Do not worry about him ... Let's think about us better, darling!

Ciao !!!

Bastards!

Just look!

What does Gianni Bozzi do sad and lonely on the shore of Rimini?

Your brother left and took with him my wife and my hopes.

They drove off to Ithaca.

No wonder my brother is crazy.

Therefore we suspended him from managing our finances.

“Could you repeat it?” “Carlo has nothing else.”

Publications, industry, banks, everything is translated into me!

So ... Do you sign contracts now?

Sure!.. It all depends on me.

Including trade with Sri Lanka and Brunei.

Countess, if you want, I will scream: "Long live Juventus!"

Long live the old woman!

No, sorry, what are you talking about!

I'm not interested in team sport ... I prefer doubles!

Why don't we talk in your suite?

To make it more convenient to sign a contract!

And about Ithaca too.

I have long been waiting for such an event!

Fetuccini! .. Bring some jam.

Eat, eat, Gusta, you need to recover, ..

... gain strength after all, what happened to you!

What happened to him?

Yugoslav smugglers, they mocked him.

- What did they do? - Tied it with a knot.

Yugoslav smugglers such a tradition.

They always tortured people like that.

Is he still here, this buffoon? .. Give him the money and send him away!

Actually, I’m still did not finish the negotiations ...

... with Signorina about Madison Square Garden.

What negotiations? .. Which Madison?

Go to hell!

- No, a minute, I want to try. - Try it? ..

- What to try? “Gustavo, don't be angry.”

You had a new experience in the Adriatic, and I...

What other experience? .. What kind of experience?

They nearly killed me!

This is also an experience! .. I need my experience!

- What are you talking about? - See this amoeba?

- Amoebu? - Amoeba, amoeba.

He brought me back a smile when I already lost hope!

Now I have to understand ... It's him, and it's you, who is my man?

- It's me, Noche, I'm your man !!! - Ai dont know, may darlin ... Let's go.

Sorry, Signor Gustavo, but you now on the other side, in Yugoslavia!

I'll kill you!.. Night! .. Night!

Stop!.. Stop !!

Come back! .. Take it easy!

Do not shout! .. Otherwise, she will then reproach you!

Listen to us.

- I already gave! - Arnaldo!

Andrea!

U give me i accepted you for a beggar from the parish!

I thought so!

How long have you been in Rimini? .. Lousy wretch!

“I'm passing through here.” - How is the mission in the southern forests?

- Are the animals okay? “I left them.”

Really?

The vicar sent me on a new mission to Finland, to the Laplanders!

And I decided to visit my brother ..

... this beautiful city this clean air!

Nothing, do not pay attention.

What a beautiful cape! .. Is this Armani? ..

“Will you sell it to me?” - This is my cassock.

Go, go, get dressed! .. Come on!

“Is she a Protestant?” - Flemish.

Come on, holy one, let's go have breakfast!

Sure, it's all God's lambs.

I must say they are beautiful, these god's sheep!

And Louise, your wife, how's it going?

“My wife? .. She's gone!” - She is resting?

No, she left with Eros ... Do you remember him?

“With Eros? .. With that painter?” - Yes Yes.

But he had a wife and four children.

Eros's wife went to Adriano and is already pregnant.

- Adriano is a pediatrician? “Yes, yes, brother Lino.”

Lino, Lino.

He fled to Bellaria with Lauretta, do you remember lauretta

Lauretta?

Yes, I remember, second cousin Kara, which was with Oddo!

Yes, Oddo.

- Where did you come from? - From Australia!

“You don't know the last joke?” “But I know two about carabinieri!”

But do you remember Oddo? .. What a womanizer he was!

He was a big mischief but I forgave him all his sins ...

He completely lost his head ... Cohabits with one choreographer.

- Oddo? - Yes.

He was a real big hero ... And he lives with a ho ... choreographer? ..

- I won’t forgive him any more sins! - That's right.

Because with these sheep ...

- Pick up the phone. - Good.

I know who it is! .. Every morning the same thing.

- Peace and peace to you! - Go to hell, to hell!

Put it on, put it on! .. This is Lorella, my wife.

Every morning he calls and threatens me ... Requires child support! .. Scum!

Clear.

And at work, at least order at work?

Things are good... I am the head of the department!

Good!

Do you remember the director’s older sister?

- I have made progress. - Well, stop it, shut up, shut up!

- Aufiderzein! - Bye, beauty!

Ciao!

You have the look of a true priest! .. A hypocritical screen!

Who knows about your exploits!

How many natives did you find in the forest as a missionary?

Have you ever seen a real native?

No!

Because if you see her, your progress will slow down immediately!

Hello, Signor Praetor! .. I heard you were in the hospital?

What happened to you?

- What happened to you? “Nothing! .. Routine inspection.”

That is, I went to check the work of the local hospital.

That's all!

- What are you doing? - It’s my fault! ..

Hang some sign a tablet, a board!

- I take sand baths! - In public places they are prohibited!

He is already making up new articles in the law!

What happened to him?.. Crazy!

“He's kind of weird!” - Not your own!

One, two.

Hello how are you doing?

- Who you are? “You won't recognize me?”

I am a girl from the forest!

Yesterday I called you an ambulance, When did you feel bad!

It was optional Nevertheless thank you.

Now go away this is a private lesson ..

... and I want to swim in complete peace.

“Why are you so bad?” - And why are you so shameless? ..

Do not be ashamed to go in such a bikini.

You can see everything it is very indecent!

But these are branded things!

You know what, better than a bikini not branded, but from one thing!

From one? .. What should I take off then?

Do not be smart!

Well, the character! .. How does your wife endure you?

When I get married I'll let you know!

Now go away, let me swim alone, I train.

One, two, one, two ...

- Who is it? - Signor praetor!

Bring back my swimming trunks! .. Scum.

Give them to me, please.

Give me the swimming trunks! .. I will declare on you.

Goodbye!

Duty on the beach! .. Excuse me.

- Hello, Signor Praetor! - Good afternoon!

Hello.

What situation.

Raphael!.. Take it off as soon as it comes out!

Are you naked men shocking?

Actually, I like women!

If it starts to get dark photos will not work!

He will be out soon! .. It starts to get colder!

We will see!

It is with me that had to happen!

Thick, stop it! .. You are breaking our hearts!

- Yes Yes. - Get a hold of yourself!..

- The night was repulsed, a conflict arose. - What conflict? ..

She pointed my horns that’s the conflict!

You have to put up!

In the courtyard of the second millennium, that happens!

- Even Alberoni speaks about it. “Yes, really, Alberoni!”

- What else is Alberoni? - Unknown, it seems one psychiatrist.

Yes, you will not envy him!

- Gustavo? “The night! .. I'm listening.”

The night?

Do you want me to say?

No... I myself!

Thick ...

Yes?

I want it for real to make love.

How?.. We did this for 6 hours?

Come to me, darling!

Thank God!.. Finally we all settled!

I set a new record!

Risking my life I could even improve it!

Scariko nothing just happens!

You will understand later.

Night with Gustavo for three days do not interrupt!

Amazing! .. It is hard to imagine!

Brothers Bowie, I'm sorry but I have to stress ..

... what is your sister’s behavior by it was insulting to me.

Anyway, the performance must continue.

Maybe somebody Will I be paid a reward?

Manzo! .. Have you prepared a reward?

Yes!

Here are two kilograms 800 grams of meat!

Yes?

I usually get paid foreign or foreign currency.

My rate is much higher.

In any case, the main thing that I returned smile to a beautiful Italian family!

Is there a bone for the broth here?

Morelli! .. It's time to have dinner!

You are walking?

Thanks, I'm not hungry!

Prefer a little more swim ... It helps with arthritis.

“I told you he was crazy!” - I think he has problems with his head.

You heard?

How to swim at such a time with arthritis?

Morelli, come out! .. You’ll get sick!

Get out of the water!

Help!

Awful

It looks like the initial stage of frostbite.

He stayed in the water for 1 7 hours.

He got on the net alone fishing boat.

1 7 hours in the water! .. Signor praetor, signor praetor!

Wake up, wake up! .. You are saved!

- Who is it? - It's me, your Piedimonte ...

How do you feel?

I feel, I feel pretty good ...

Here, here, here on a chair.

What happened to you?.. What have you been doing in water for so long?

Because I was taking sand baths.

In water?

Mud, mud and sand, with wet sand.

Sand baths help me a lot ... I want to go home.

- Take your clothes. - I'm going to take it.

No no, sister will bring.

- My sister? - Nun!

A nun from Monza?

I'll write you a sedative and better tonic!

And go home ... Call a taxi?

I'll take him!

This is me involuntary reason Signor Praetor's failures!

I have a car here ... I will be happy to take him!

This is the signorina that I spoke of ... The one with the cat.

- Lola Sarti. - Dr. Piedimonti ... Very nice.

Take two tablets before ... - ... food?

- No, before ... “... by how to go to the toilet?”

- Before, before ... - ... sleep?

Yes, see! .. This is a real torpedo!

Are you still angry with me, Gildo?

Do not call me Gildo ... Have we switched to "you"? ..

“We have never even eaten together.” “Is that an invitation?”

- I even think ... - With pleasure!

- What are you doing? - Lick like me.

How?

What kind of taste?

It seems like a lemon.

It is a taste of love.

Close your eyes and open your mouth.

What do you want to do?

- Eat this ... - What?

- Mussel. - Which one?

And imagine what do you eat me

How?

It seems a little a little harsh.

- Want more? - No!

I would like to go straight to the fruit.

Gildo, my fork fell under the table ... Pick her up, please.

Where?.. Now.

- There below? - Yes.

Gildo! .. Gildo, what are you doing?

Nothing, took the plug.

I hope didn't you look at my legs?

Who am I?.. No.

I don’t wear panties.

And it seemed to me that they you had black with villi.

“Gildo, see those two?” - Where?

“That tall one? .. Look. - Yes.

Once he stopped me, touched me my ass and said: "Beautiful ass!"

What's bad about it?.. This is a typical compliment in Romagna ...

- I think there are good people here? - No, they are like animals.

“You must teach them a lesson.” - I AM?

“Aren't you the guardian of the law?” - Yes, but ...

Otherwise, I’ll do it myself! .. You have disappointed me!

I thought, that you too are in love with me!

But I love .., love .., Lola, wait, wait a minute.

- Listen, see that shorty? - Yes.

He said you are three asses and that if he comes out, he’ll hit you!

Lola!

- What do you want? “What are you going to do to us?”

I AM?

Nothing, I just said a compliment.

- Wottebe a compliment! - How do you talk? ..

Pick up the expressions!

This is slander I will sue, perhaps.

On whom?

- Turn around. - I do not want...

Now it's my turn!

Wait, Now it's the turn of this signor.

What did you want to do to us?

- Can you swim with an hatchet? - Not really.

Then it's time to learn.

Help, help.

Kind heart of my jesus I love more.

Rimini, my city of Rimini how beautiful you are ...

For help!.. Help! .. Help!

- I'm going! - Help!

- Food, hold on! - Faster Faster!

“I'm flying! .. Already here!” - Help!

I'm here, grab hold.

- Help ... help. - Yes.

- I can not anymore. - I'm coming!

Get me out please Help...

Help.

What did you do?

I swam, jellyfish attacked me look!

Sorry, can you ...

- Look, here, here, here! - I cant.

- Look here, here! - I can’t ... see!

Look! .. Everything’s on fire with me! .. It's like the fire of Sant Antonio!

This is the temptation the temptation of Sant Anthony!

She burns and changes color! .. I read in the encyclical ...

In the encyclopedia ...

Jellyfish have such poison that the skin turns blue!

No, this is a reflection from the sea !!

Take cover, take cover cover yourself!

No!.. So it’s even worse for me!

Then...

She touched me!

“What can I do, I'm not a doctor!” - Suck me the poison from the burned places!

I AM?.. No.

“Do you know French?” - No, I know Latin perfectly.

Suck me the poison otherwise it will swell even more!

No.

I'm not a medic I can not do anything!

Urgent help needed! .. I ask you to!

- What can I do? - I read in the encyclopedia!

We need to get closer to the victim, and I am a victim, I was burned by jellyfish!

Ask, do me a favor!

I need to call a doctor good doctor!

- Take a look! - Doctors, doctors!

We're going to the doctor! .. We're going to the doctor!

We're going to the doctor! .. We're going to the doctor!

Do not be a scoundrel!

Do not insist, I almost brought 5 aboriginal women to death.

I will not suck!

It burns here, here, here! .. My chest is burning!

I can not!.. It hurts me to look at you!

I understand, you have tears of hail!

I suffer a lot! .. It's impossible!..

- I ask you to! - Stop it!

I beg you, for God's sake!

- What did you say? - For God's sake!

Okay, just because what did you mention the Almighty, ..

... just for the sake of respect.

Where is "here?.. Good.

No not there It hurts here!

- Passed? - No, suck!

Now I have to go all the time? ..

So ... Already better, better ... Passes by!

It’s going through you, and now I’m unlikely!

Here, please, here! .. Burns with clear fire!

And here, only slightly, slightly.

- You are welcome. - Yes.

Thanks!.. What a relief!

What a relief! .. Much better, you are very kind!

And now, if you want, change!

I always did a kangaroo and it was awesome!

- I did not even hope. - For what?

Ke tu sorti avek mua.

What do you agree, agree that you will agree with me for a walk.

- Mua non plu. - What?

- I, too! - Oh yes!

Where are you taking me?

Did you see Milan? .. Hope we love each other?

Is it great?

Explain why did we come here.

To throw Italy at your feet: Milan, galleries, spiers!

You are like a fragile gothic spire, on which the doves decided to perch!

For your information, in Milan hanged nets so that pigeons do not stain spiers.

Networks?

Then where do they do it, in the skyscrapers?

- Tolerate! “Did you run away from me to Turin? ..”

A charming city famous for sheep farming!

- Sheep in Turin? - Yes, sheep, lambs.

- Do I laugh too? - It's funny! ..

Liliana, where are you? .. Caution on the road!

Max, let's go! .. I'm tired!

I'm leaving!

How do you leave?

Right now when we arrived in this eternal city ..

... you want to defile everything!

“I don't like these jokes.” - I'm absolutely serious ...

Come to me.

- What are you doing? - What you need, do not worry!

- Let go! - Come, come here!

Let me go!.. Stop it! ..

- They are looking at us. - Who's watching?..

Hell!

Swiss security?

Lillian!

Let's go, let's go!

- Liliana! - Until!

Well, today is the day.

First: I got an ashtray dirty; second: refused!

We can’t get used to this.

Third: forced to pay for tickets.

Lillian!.. Yes, you go!

Listen what you got Red heart?..

- Is it a sports association? - Sports Association?

Somewhat,..

... permission to play sports, walking, running, and even baseball.

What do we do?

Jump into the water and swim to the shore!

You can jump only I can’t swim ...

- I'll try to make it. “You drive a boat so well!”

But he does not know that I can’t swim.

I took it and went.

Listen, I wanted to say something.

Despite the fact that we are not familiar and never see you again.

This was great!

Yes, but now, as a man, for the sake of what happened ..

... I can fix it.

What?.. Did something happen?

- Nothing! - Nothing?

No, it was a dream it seemed to me.

I have to go... Someone is waiting for me.

I have to leave ... Time to say good-bye!

Good!

Goodbye, my savior!

Goodbye!

- Goodbye! - Goodbye!

If there is anyone upstairs hears do me a favor!

Help start this damn motor!

So you are not offended at me? .. Are you angry?

Yes, this is the Karim Hotel ... I'll call you now.

Signor Praetor, you to the phone!

To the phone! .. Hello?..

Yes it's me.

Hello, Signor Prefect.

I've been waiting for your call for two days ... I'm a little excited.

I was very worried ... I was looking for you even in the grove, on the hammock!

This prefect is very sporty, like Dad.

I wanted to test you.

Disappeared for a while to test your feelings!

To be sure that you want me!

- Do you love me? - Yes.

- Louder! - Yes, I respect you very much!

Your voice is driving me crazy.

Tell me what you want kiss me on the lips!

“I want to kiss you on the lips!” - Louder! .. Even louder!

I want to... This is the prefect.

I want to kiss you in the lips, kiss on the lips!

Come today at three ... Waiting for you on the street Wisteria.

Let's be alone: me, you and love, a lot of love!

- Yes? - Gildo.

It's you?.. Waiting for you ... Get up.

Yes... Which floor?

- Twenty seventh. - I'm flying!

What a nightmare, god ...

The creator of the elevator is a real genius.

So ... it should ... must be the twenty-seventh ...

Infernal adventure.

I can not anymore.

- Lola, I am burning with desire! - Stop, what are you doing?

Darling

- Come on now ... right here! - What?

Exactly this!

The pills start to work no, they are already acting!

Lola,.. I love you!

But I’m not sure of your love! .. Where is the proof?

How, where is the evidence?

It was awesome to call you, how I ran and walked up to the hundredth floor!

Lola, please, I want to live with you, I want to marry you.

Do you want me to quit my job! .. Want to go to Honolulu?

Let's go to Honolulu! .. To Paris, so to Paris!

To Milan, so to Milan!

Are you ready to fulfill my every desire?

All you want.

Take off your trousers first.

“Look at those two.” - Goddess and the beast!

How I get excited at the thought that under this skirt hides the male body!

- And you? - I'm not very ...

Because on the way to me almost cheated ...

I have not heard a single kind words .. not a single one!

Try to be more feminine change your voice!

Lola, can I ask you something?

I can’t understand why did you make me dress up like that?

- Have you seen "9 and a half weeks"? - No.

She dressed in men's clothes to like him.

Do you want to make me feel good?

- Liliana! - What?

- I'm Liliana. - well!

- And you? - What?

- What's your name? - Who cares?

- To know! - Jeremiah, can Jerry!

- What do we do? - Crazy!

I recently broke up.

Twelve years old I helped my husband.

He had a small business, but he didn’t understand anything in business ...

“And I helped him.” - Enough! .. Let's not talk about that.

Let's talk about us and the upcoming night.

Look who's here! .. You are already good!

Be a good girl.

- What? - Let's go to.

What are you doing?

“I want you! .. Here and now!” - No no!

Do you want it too?.. Tell me, do you want too?

Yes, but not here let's go to your house.

No.

- Or to me! - Not here!

- Come to you! - No, here, here!

- On the beach, on the beach! - No, here, in plain sight!

- Undress! - I feel awkward!

Look, I'm not afraid! .. Not afraid!

What are you doing?

- Only to you! - No!

- I swear! - Help!

Do not worry, it repeats every night!

“How? .. Jerry, calm down!” - I am calm.

- Quiet! “I'm completely calm.”

- Jerry! “Well, Signora?”

I can pick it up or will you bring it later?

“Is he your son?” “No, dear, my husband!”

Sorry, I didn’t know.

Don't worry beauty I'm used to it!

He wants me to be jealous poor thing!

So beautiful, and so attractive!

But not valid!

You haven’t lost anything, dear! .. He never gets to the point!

Can not!

Kisses, caresses mostly down, understand?

Do you know what I call him? .. My girlfriend

Are you upset?.. You wanted to sleep with him, cutie?

- What did you think? - Go to the seashore! ..

There you will find one who will fix everything, go honey!

Wake up! .. Get up! ..

Come on!

- Let's dance? - Let's dance!

But not together! .. Need to find a man.

A man? .. Darling, you do not understand.

Even if I'm in a woman’s dress, ..

... I can not control strongest physical attraction!

I'm head over heels in love with you ... I love you very much!

I love you too!

But you have to fulfill my last wish ..

... then I'm yours!

Go! .. Go!

With whom?

- Over there! - With beard?

- Let's dance? - I have no desire.

Why?

Listen, a piece of shit ...

... I throw out critters, even if they fall for me.

How? .. Thanks ... Very humane.

Almost immediately it turned out that one with a beard is a great fisherman ..

... but he does not dance.

- Find another. - Where?

See that one in the hat? .. Dance a tango with him.

- Tango? “And kiss him.”

- What? - On the lips!

- What? “You understand very well.”

Yes, but you know, Lola, I haven’t kissed anyone on the lips yet.

Its time to begin.

But I would rather start with you darling!

Do as I said! .. Otherwise, you will not see me again!

No, no, I'll kiss him kiss on the lips, the one in the hat.

Good evening... Signor, will we dance?

Do me a favor ... I will explain later.

Have you seen?.. It was his initiative!

They kissed!

Here it is, judge Morelli, who closed my cabaret "Blue Angel", ..

... an ardent defender of morality!

I exposed you!

Now you are finished! .. Bastard!

Do you want will i give you this daisy?

You take those and I am these.

Let's make a boat.

Pio Pio! .. Are not you asleep yet?

What are you watching?.. I hate monsters!

Today there were too many of them! .. Goodnight!

When mom comes, say .. that nothing happened.

- Who is it? - Liliana? ..

- May I sleep with you? - Honestly...

I'm scared of monsters!

Monsters? .. I told you!

Mom always allows if I'm scared!

- So go to mom! - Today she will not come to sleep.

- Do you have children? “At me? .. No, unfortunately.”

Then let's pretend that I am your child, and you are my mother.

I'm your mom and you are my child.

Now I'm calm ... And you?

To me?

What are you doing?

Pio ... Pio? ..

Can you explain, why were you wearing women's clothing?

Because... I went ... to the carnival.

In summer?

Yes, because ... in winter I am very busy ..

... so I go to masquerades ... ...in August.

As usual, don't want to tell the truth ...

- Are you okay? - So-so.

- Maybe talk to a psychologist? “Dr. Piedimonte, thank you.”

But now I'm bigger I don’t want to talk to anyone.

Even with me?

Lola!

Excuse me, I need to go away.

Came to enjoy your revenge?

I saw newspapers, an article for the whole page with the announcement of photos ...

... in tomorrow's issue.

Congratulations on winning!

It’s a pity you didn’t bet could win a large sum!

But for me you won.

No... I came to say that I am defeated.

And for you to forgive me for my behavior, keep ..

... these are films with yesterday's photos.

They will never be printed in the newspapers!

If you want to, now we can always be together!

No, no, Lola, or Ramona, or what is your name.

We are not made for each other! .. Our roads diverge!

And mine goes completely in the other direction.

“Gildo, it cannot be!” - That's right ...

This adventure turned my life upside down.

For me it was a lifetime ... She completely changed me!

Gildo, what are you saying?

Nothing, just you too good as a woman ..

... and I'm too weak as a man.

I went.

Maybe from now on my new life begins.

- Bye, beauty! - Gildo, Gildo! ..

Where are you going?.. Gildo!

- What happened? “I don't know, it's kind of weird.”

Which one?

- My name is Pino. - Me Gildo.

Good morning!

Hi,.. how cute!

Breakfast in bed!

All inclusive!

By the way I would immediately like to do one thing.

- Which one? - Only 250 thousand.

I'm sorry I did not understand!

Mom’s girlfriend’s usually pay me three hundred, but I made you a discount!

It's not so much for touching the forbidden.

Here is the change! .. I need to create a base.

Otherwise, how will I accumulate your first billion?

You promised to tell me!

Good... I did it!

Did? .. So how is it?

Awesome!

According to your tone, it seems awful ... How do you rate him?

- Whom? - The one on the moped?

- It was not him. - Incredible! ..

Then who?

I will not say even under pain of death!

- Tell me, at least, I know him? “Yes, you know.”

But not so good as it seems!

Lillian!

What does he have to do with it? .. This is not his fault!

You must be right it's my fault.

But now I’m much better.

Bye, Simone, thank you! .. Goodbye dear!

Until.

Let's go to the sea.

Fly to Oslo and then you go on a sleigh with deer, like Santa Claus!

Italy, Landing on Oslo begins.

I have to go.

- Bye, brother. - Until!

- Until. - Until!

If I come to Lapland, I'll pick you up!

They say at the North Pole guests are offered wives ..

... and if you refuse, they are offended.

Do not talk nonsense!

I hope you will not be demoted because of some lapland.

From now on, smoking is allowed.

I'm glad you ride too towards Scandinavia.

“Will you come out in Frankfurt?” - No, in Oslo.

In Oslo?

And then I will get to Lapland.

What will you do there?

Association sent me social workers.

I will work with some priest.

Is he Italian or Laplander?

No!.. Italian, Italian!

The only positive thing otherwise ...

What, the rest?

It seems we will live in some kind of cell, only he and I ...

... work together all day rather, at night.

You know polar night lasts half a year!

And all this time I will be alone with him!

Mission is mission.

This is me about Rimini.