All language subtitles for Carry On Wise Guy (1980)

Mister, you've been hit.

Don't say anything now. Let me carry you

inside.

Sit down. Let me get you some water.

Ohh

Here, have some water.

You better. Mark, you've got

to help me. Brother, what's going

on?I don't know.

He wants me to help him, but I don't know

whether I can. After all, I'm a monk.

Mister?Don't you get shot?Go

and get the Abbot. Ah

Mister?You all right?

Buck, please. You

must help me.

Muck, this is a map

of the Japanese forces in China.

You have to pass it on.

Ohh Mister, we're holy men here. We can't

get involved. Listen, Muck, you're also

Chinese. Our headquarters

will send a man to fetch the map on April

15th, Mushroom Lane in

Dragon Town. I... I

I can't go there myself. I wait,

Mr. Please help me.

Tingfu Abbott.

You know our rules. We protect the

oppressed and those who are in need. Yes,

I'm aware of that, but I don't know

what to do now. What do you advise?

It's true that we're all monks here, but

it's also true that we're Chinese.

Yes.

Abbott, you're a real patriot.

Now, a man who'll meet you has got a

large lump on on

his... Mister!

Lump on his back!

Mister!

Abbot. Abbot. Abbot.

Japanese soldiers coming this way.

Brother, you and Sinfu take our holy

books and this military map with you. Get

rid of the corpse and leave here at once.

Brother, you can. Quickly. Quickly come

and carry this.

Master, you better go too. We'll wait

here for the Abbot. All right. We'll meet

you in the next valley. Right.

Sir, there are some bloodstains. He must

be inside. All right, come on in. You

two got the main entrance, rest in time.

Yes, sir.

Mister, what do you want?

We're here in the rioters. We're looking

for a spy. Mister, this is the

temple of Buddha. There are no spies

here. HuhWe saw the

bloodstains outside leading right in

here. We know you're hiding. I assure you

I saw nobody come in here. If I do find a

spy here, I'll see that you're executed.

Search. Uh, gentlemen, you're

making a big mistake.

Damn monk, you're asking to ditch

yourself. That's far

enough.

Run for it. Run away.

Hold it.

Run away.

Come

on.

Brother. Brother.

Are you all right?

Open this door.

Go. Open up. Open up this

door. Leave. Hurry. Open

up. Open up. Open

this door.

Master. Master.

Master. Master.

Where's the Abbot?The Abbot's

been murdered. The Japs

Huh

Would his name be praised?Would his name

be praised?Dinfu, you better look

after this. Master, does it make any

difference?Who keeps it?It's a

long way to Dragon Town. Japanese are

everywhere. It's going to be dangerous.

Master, I remember hearing from some

friends that there are two young men who

help people to escape. We ought to

contact them,

right?Let's be on our way! Get out of my

way! Come

on! Get on the phone! All right!

Where did it go?Come on! Bunny well!

Monks on the run! Well...

You got a seat.

Up you go. Cast up!

Come on, passengers, just calm down.

We'll see you, right?I guarantee they'll

take you to safety. The price is cheap,

just five dollars up front. Five

dollars?Yep. I don't know who's worse,

these bandits or the JapsIt's stay that

robbery. Well, you can always stay behind

and try your luck with them. Okay. All

right, monks. 5 bucks up front. Come on.

Let's have your cash. Come on. Come

on

Find your chop, chop. Let's have your

money there. 5 bucks up front. $5 from

you. Come on, $5. Thank you, folks.

Hey, Reverend, I guess that's pretty

valuable. You hold. Hey, it's

fine. Yeah, $5.

Hey, have a smoke. Business good

today. Folks, I sure need the money here.

Get down. It's a Japanese potobo. Don't

make a sound. Get down.

Hey, hey, look there. A boat.

Heave two. Heave two. Dammit, the

Japanese are gonna board us. They haven't

yet. Keep going. HuhMove.

Heave two or we'll fire. Open fire. Get

out of the quarry. Get out of thepillars.

Hey, Abbott, what's in it?Is it

valuable?Hey, I reckon I deserve a share

now for giving you a hand. It's only

Buddhist relics. Worth nothing. Is that

so?If they're worth nothing,

why do you hang on to it so tightly?For a

fellow who's so young, you're very

greedy. What's wrong with that?Everybody

needs money. Why else would I help?Oh,

that's true. Hey, I paid you to take me

to Dragon Town. Come off it. I don't have

a boat anymore. How can I take you to

Dragon Town?Ask someone else. Hey,

you hold it. If you do help me get there,

I'll see you get rewarded.

Where'd you want to go again?Dragon Town.

Dragon Town. That's a long way. We better

leave now.

Hey, there's a village there. Let's go

take a look.

Oh, Reverend, I haven't eaten all day and

I can't go another step. I'll beg for

some money. Mm-hmm

Hello?

Yes, Monk, what is it?Madam, can

you spare some money?Look, Monk, don't

you know there's a war on?We don't have

any money to give you. Just some food

will do, any kind of food. If you could,

we'd appreciate some roast chicken. You

want roast chicken?Mm-hmmWhat do you

think this is?A restaurant?Madam, forget

about him. We're hungry. He wants

something to eat. If you wait a minute.

Thank you. Hey, wait. You'd eat

anything, but I can't take that. Don't be

so fussy. We're lucky to get anything.

Reverend. Thank you very much. Take your

time. I'll go and get some water. Thank

you. Here,

come. HuhIt's tasteless.

Just a potato. You know, what did I

do?Wait.

Umm Madam, the bug says he'd like some

tea. Go on, give him some tea.

Mister, madam, you've got to help me.

Oh, what's the matter?

Mr. Madam, that monk out there is an evil

man. I'm terrified of him. Oh, what did

he do to you, Mr. That monk out

there knows black magic. He killed my

parents, my whole family. He cast spells

on my wife and all my children. And now

he's maybe a slave. I can't escape.

Are you sure?He looked to me like a

nice enough man for a monk. Haven't you

noticed that box he carries with him?He's

got the skulls of 108 children inside. I

swear his magic is powerful. Yesterday,

at a house just like this, he asked them

for some money and he killed the entire

family. Oh, my dear, what are we going?

Where is this fellow?Hey, he's sitting

right outside your door. If I disobey

him, he says he'll break both my legs.

Oh, really?He's got a really mean streak.

You don't say.

It's a wonder you can stand it. It's

true. I don't know what I'm going to do.

Easy. I'll think of a way to get rid of

him. Very well. You must get his box.

Without his magic, he won't work anymore.

But if you don't get the box, chances are

we'll all end up dead. You mean we'll all

be dead?Hey, don't be

afraid. We can work together. I will take

the box, then do as I say. You'll charge

him at once. But remember, don't listen

to a word he says to you. He'll try to

curse you. Oh, that's easy to fix and

plug our ears. That's very smart. All

right, let's get ready. I'll go outside

first. OK.

Hey, you finished?Of course. Not

too bad. At least it's full.

Don't know why you made a fuss.

Yes, gentlemen. Anything.

Give me the

fuck

What are you hitting me for?

Hey, come on. Yeah!

What's your game?Give it to me.

What do you want from me?Tell me what's

going on.

I come here. I come here.

There, you fool. Come on. Get that

box. Hey, come back. Don't go. Help

me out. You guys promise. Come on. Help

me get the box. Please. Don't go. Let's

get out of here. Help me. I want to get

the box. Help me get it. Come on. Help

me. Please. Open up. Help me. What do you

want from them?Nothing. I just wanted

them to give me some more food, that's

all. But you refused it earlier.

And now you want some more. Why should

they give you any?Would you be all right?

I'm sure you won't starve. Of course not.

I will never starve. I've too many

friends. Hey, I'll

wait for you here until you get back. You

wait there.

Hey, that's you, sir.

Where have you been?You're alive.

Where have you been?I've taken the monk

to Dragon Town. You've got a bit crazy.

What do you want with a poor monk?He's

got nothing. He's got a box with him.

He's got treasure. Treasure. You got it

yet?Not yet. He's too good at Kung Fu.

Too bad. Hey, I have an idea.

What do you

think?A ghost.

The Walking Dead. I run the

move. Make

way for The Walking Dead. The

walking dead are on the way.

What's the matter?I

don't feel too good. I've got

awful stomach ache. I reckon I must have

got food poisoning. I feel awful.

Oh, in that case, you better take a rest

here. OK, now you see, they're all bedded

down.

Master, here's a spot for you. Now take

it nice and easy. I'll fix it. You just

leave it to me. All right, you fix it.

Go.

Oh, it hurts.

Master, you all right?Are you still in

plane?Oh, it hurts bad.

Really bad. You better go and

get me some medicine. Oh, you just take

it easy.

I heard in this part of the country that

there really are ghosts. If you've done

nothing wrong, they'll never harm you. So

don't be afraid. Well, I'm not scared

because you're a monk.

They really are ghosts. Chow out. What

are you doing?Nothing. Monk. Why

don't we stay here for the night?There's

plenty of room.

Reverend, here you are. Come on.

Here, you can sleep in here.

Reverend, I'm just going for a pee. Don't

go to sleep. I'll be back soon. Allright.

Fat dragon. Fat dragon.

That you're not Fat Dragon. Why don't you

talk?Hey, I assume Fat Dragon did send

you. What are you covering your face for?

You'll fall down. I'll take it away for

you.

Hey, you're very real. Even I feel a bit

frightened. Hey, he's over there. Go

ahead.

Hey, Fat Dragon's done real well. He's

brought a lot of his friends here. Why

are you covering your face?

Don't be shy,

Pat Dragon. This is great. Even butter

can't help you now.

You guys better tread a bit carefully

here. The monk's just inside. I'm going

to lie down. I'll leave the monk to you.

No, not that way! Over there! It's over

there!

Hey, have you all gone deaf?I just said

that way! Did you hear me?

That way!

Ah, I said over there!

I wonder what's keeping him

up to his tricks again.

Where could he have gotten to?

What's going on?Where the hell Shamar got

to?Can't even have a pee because of him.

Ohh

That fellow must be the monk. My God,

what the hell's that?Buddha's name be

praised. No wonder it's written. Temples

are holy ground. Evil can't live there.

It only exists outside. Hey, give me

the box. Give me

the box. Who are you?

I am a spirit you don't know. I have got

to scare you to death unless

you give me the box. Could his name be

praised?There are holy writings kept in

this box. They don't belong to you.

ohh I used to be an abbot of Shaolin

Temple. You mean to

say you're dead?Yes, I'm no longer

human, but I run the spirit well 'cause I

haven't got the box. And now I yearn for

eternal rest, see how long my hair is.

Spirits don't have haircuts. I

don't suppose they do, but from what I

can see, you look quite healthy.

You don't believe that?I'm always

hungry. Spirits don't get anything to

eat. I'm just swollen. What can I

do to help?Give me the box.

All right and follow me.

Hey, tell me. Why are your hands

such a different color?What's that?

Where's your tongue?You just stepped on

it. Who are you?

Where the hell have you been?It's you,

is it?Well, you gave me a fright. Your

friends back there are too much. Oh, you

brought along a lot of helpers. Well,

that's good of you. Right, my friends,

all at once to get the monk! Come on! Ohh

Come on, I'm not afraid of you. Now, hand

over that box. Why should I give the box

to you?There's

nothing more to say. Come on.

Come on

What on earth are you two up to?

He's gone. Get him!

Hey, come on. Now what are you

doing?Will you come back?

Will you get out of my way?Come on!

You can see can move?Ah, they really are

doing a good job! It's fantastic!

Hey, you've done a great job here. I'll

just go and get the box and then you can

beat him up for me. I want revenge! Hey!

Hey, what are you just

stranded there?Come on, go on, get

going, help the man! Will you go and help

him?Why are you just standing around?

Look, Bear, what are you so scared of?Go

on, get in there! Go on, get in!

You just walked into me, you stupid fool!

Ow, what are you doing now?Ohh

Yeah, Dragon, will you come over here to

help me?Come on over, will you?Hurry!

Go on, go on, get him. Go on. Go on, go

on. Go on, go

on,

go on. That's the

way, come on. Follow me. That's the

way. Go

on, get him. Hey, here I am.

I'll

swallow it.

Hey, what are you doing?Don't

you know?Now that I've swallowed the

paper, they'll do whatever I tell them.

Is that right?Your magic's vanished.

You do it. Certainly. Just watch me. Huh

It won't work. They're not moving.

Get him! Get him! Get him! Get him!

They're going the wrong way. Huh

Who's the idiot fooling around with the

Walking Dead?Walking Dead?

Ohhohh I'm ahead.

You aren't any match for me. Stop it.

So you're Captain Wang. What do you want?

I've been sent here by Captain Yun. Oh,

Captain Yun is a good man. Thank

you.

Captain Noon says that if you're man

enough for it, he wants to have dinner

with you tonight to discuss the

distribution of Terradari.

Tell him I'll be there also.

Captain Yoon says, nobody is to carry any

weapons. He hopes that you'll understand.

You can go back and tell Captain Yoon, I

make a point of never carrying weapons to

dinner. I leave now.

Captain, I don't trust this guy Yoon.

He'll try to cheat. Cheat?

Ginyun, I haven't taken you out for a

long time. It doesn't matter if I'm with

you.

Ah, Captain Wang, nice to see you. Please

come in. This way, please. Sit down.

Cheers, streak up. Captain

Wang, welcome,

welcome. Thank you for your

invitation.

We're very important guests here. Oh,

really?

So it's you, Mr. Kongtin. How do you do?

How do you do?Sit down, please.

Oh, she's pretty. Very nice.

Captain Wang, if I'm not mistaken,

this lady's Miss Fa Yin Yin.

Yin Yin. Say hello, Mr. Wongtin.

Captain Yoon. She

insisted that I bring her along with me

tonight. I hope you will not mind. Ohh

She's most welcome. We're like one big

happy family here. That's why I've

invited you and Kong Tin today to have

dinner with me. All right, Captain

Yoon. What is it?Let's get straight down

to business. I'm sure we can talk frankly

in front of Kong Tin.

Captain Wang, let's take Dragon Town.

The south part is yours, the north part

is mine. But recently too many of your

boys have strayed into my half and some

of my men have been hurt. You know

how hard it is to control your own men.

They take what they want. They find it

hard to recognize your boundaries.

Captain Wang, are you suggesting the

rules don't apply?If

I wanted to discuss the rules,Now, I

wouldn't have come here tonight.

But since Kong too is here, I'm-- Oh,

never mind, never mind. Go ahead, go

ahead. It's your problem, you settle it.

I'm not gonna win a fear. It's up to you

now. But don't forget that what I want is

death. And more death, more death.

ohh

Miss Yin Yin is very good. I'll

show you how good we are.

You said that you wouldn't bring any

weapons here, but you

don't frighten me one little bit.

Very good, very good. Mr. Kong Chin.

Captain Wang, you

did really well. You didn't do too

bad yourself, Mr. Kong Chin. Now yin's

out of the way. Captain Wang, you can

take over his territory. I'll inform the

Japanese. Ohh Thank you, Mr. Kong Chin.

Our commander likes the way you work, but

we'll have to collectAll your firearms

first. You do a good job and help the

Japanese. Then in three months' time,

I'll let you have your guns back. Oh,

that sounds quite all right. I got a

job. I want you to do. A spy

has stolen a map detailing Japanese troop

movements. I want you to get it back. Oh,

where's the spy now?He's dead. But

my men tell me before he died, he gave it

to a monk.

Oh, watch her. What

did you find out?Oh, there's a notice

gone up in Dragon Town to jail all monks.

Why should they jail the monks?They say

one of them has the map.

What happened to Lo?Oh, he's been

killed. But just before he was killed,

he managed to give it to a monk.

I think you better go to Dragon Town

yourself. All

right. Well, we better not go out

together. I'll go to Dragon Town to

check. That's all for today. Right.

Come on. Excuse me, madam.

Sorry. Lionel

Mox. Hey.

What's up there, Jenny Gould of Mox?We

can't bring him in here. we do bring him

here, what are we gonna get?We've been

with him so long, I even hold the box for

him. I'm sure it's got treasure. You're

so certain we'll have to do something. Do

what?Ah, first of all, you go buy some

clothes and get some for yourself. I'll

go get some other things. We'll meet back

here later. All right.

Oh, over there.

Hey, how are things in town?Very bad. Huh

What's up?We got big trouble. They're

jailing all the monks. Huh

All the monks?That's right.

While we were on the way back, we saw

them arresting some monks.

Hey, quick, cheer him up.

Don't worry. As long as I'm

with you, things will work out.

You doubt it?Shall I?Bring the stuff in.

Uh-huhYeah, they're all

new. Put them on. Put them on. So you

won't take a mug.

Hey, what about his bald head?Oh, that's

easy. Sir, as long as you're prepared to

help. To help?It's quite simple. Sit

up. Well, take a moment. close your eyes.

Don't over them

yet. Mm-hmm

You reckon I look like a monk still?

Absolutely not. All right.

Do you have any relatives in town?I gotta

stay till April 15th. Umm Shamar

knows the town really well. That's true.

His girlfriend, Sousa, runs a hotel. Uh,

no, hold on, it won't work. Why not?Your

mother's a real bad, and we owe her money

from the last time. Uh, don't worry.

As long as I'm along. Oh, sweet talkie

old bag. No deal. You still owe us some

money from the last time. Ha, that's

nothing. I can handle your mother all

right. Hey! Hey, Sousa. It's been a

long time. Don't be silly. You haven't

come here to see me. Hey, let me

introduce. This is Fat Choy. This is

Salsao. Salsao?Ow!

Ow! There you are, you fat fool! You owe

me money for the last time. How dare you

show your face! Mom! Take it easy! Shut

up! Ohh

Arty, you haven't got any customers right

now, so why don't let us stay here?You go

to hell this minute. You good for

nothing! Unless you can pay. I'm not

going to let you stay. I know you're

kind. And keep your hands on my

daughters. Go to hell! Mom!

Look, Madam, listen to me. I didn't want

to do this, but we've got no money.

Please let us stay here until we can find

a job. You'll get your money.

Those two are useless. I know their type.

I'm a herbalist. Ohh

Really. Of course. He's my

student. He's very clever. Yeah, he's

really clever now. Come on, let's go in.

Wait, wait, waitListen to me. If you've

got anything the matter with you at all,

like a stomachache, runny balls, this

color tongue, or any of that kind of

stuff, you just let him know. He'll see

you, right?Cheat. Rat at or trust you,

Dinch. Ohh

Oh, who would have thought my first

patient would be you?It's an accident.

And don't you cover it. You better stop

talking and think of a way how we're

going to pay the rent out on our ear.

He's quite right. I know my mother. She

always means what she says. You've seen

what she's like. I agree. Your

mother has really got it in for both of

us. But with him, it's different.

Hey, that's right. He's absolutely right.

Of course. What are you talking about?

What I mean is you could have a new daddy

soon. Shut up. You better make some money

quick. There's a sucker. You take him or

me. I'll do it. All right?Go on then. Umm

My friend, seems like you don't feel too

well. I don't feel well. Shut up. Come

along. Tell us. Don't you feel dizzy when

going to the toilet?Uh-huhNo.

Because I'm sitting on it. Well, when you

run for a long time, don't you get tired?

If it's a long way, I go in a car.

If you spend a long time playing mahjong,

don't you ever get tired?I'm sorry. I

don't gamble. Huh

If you get beaten up, do you get hurt?Do

you get hurt?Clever bastard isn't he?

Come on, help me. Here I come.

Fat dragon. Help me. Help. I can't

stand it. Help me. Fat dragon. Come on,

help. Quickly. Quickly.

Knock me. You fool. Quickly.

Blindfold him.

Help. He's the one. Quickly. Go and tell

Captain Guang. I'll keep watching you.

Beat him! All right!

Ohh

My head! He's the fella.

You sure?Yeah.

Let's get him. Come with me. You don't

have to involve yourself a small fry. Let

your men handle it for you. All right.

Remember, I want him alive, right?

Mr. Chan, who's been giving you a hard

time?Captain Swang's men's after me.

What are you doing here, though?I've come

here to help you. That's fair enough.

You're all traitors.

Bastard who are you?The Chinese.

You shouldn't ask me that. You've

betrayed your country. Or maybe you've

forgotten that you're all Chinese bybird.

Come

on. Come on

If you're not more careful, you'll end up

with a broken head. Uh, if you feel any

better, well, take it out. It's none of

your business. Uh-huh

Hey, hey, where's your box?

Where's it called?I'll look for it there.

I've got it in a safe place. Uh-huh

Drag it. Your trousers are falling down.

UhYeah, I know. I ripped them,

unfortunately. Let me fix them for you.

Oh, all right. Take him off.

Thank you, you're very kind. Nothing

really. How long?It

won't be long, but you two better wait

outside for a moment. Here, don't catch

cold. Hey, he's not a bad fella.

Hmm Hey, hey, what are you doing?

I am thinking. You don't do it like that.

So how should I do it?Well, like me. Sit

down. Hey, there's

no point in sitting down. HuhIn three

days' time it'll be April 15th, and he'll

hand the box over and we'll be left with

nothing. With my

brains and your prawn, we'll think of

something. Hey,

what are you two sitting there for?Why

aren't you out looking for work?It's no

use. Your fella doesn't ask for any

money, so what's the point of working?

That's right. Hey,What do you mean, my

father?You're driving me mad. Your

girlfriend says she's going to be mad, eh

That's her business. Damn you, you bastard

Hey, hey, no, no, noI'll beat you

both up. Sow, sow.

Hey, hey, you...

You damn dragon, how dare you and so my

girlfriend. Don't speak so loudly. If all

I should hear, they'll think you for

real, and they'll take me off to jail.

But you've done nothing wrong. Hey, easy

now. Hey, I've got an idea how to handle

that monk. How?How many commandments?

There are 10. Not the Christians. Well,

they shouldn't smoke and they shouldn't

drink. I'm not talking about that. What

else is forbidden to monks?

What's that?Oh, six. Yeah. Hey,

Brad. I found

it. I found it. What have you found?I

found a guy who's got a love on his back.

Where is he?Shall mass, William. Keeping

an eye on him. Quickly, take me there.

Oh, let's go then. Mr.

Chandler, can I see?Bye-bye. Ah, there

you are. They're waiting for you. That's

right. And there you are, see?

This is a whorehouseBut the fact is, the

man with the love for his back came here.

Relax. Take him in. Go on. Come

in. No need to be afraid. Hurry. Don't be

shy. Go on.

He's inside.

Follow me. Oh.

Where is he?Take it easy.

I reckon it got to be your first time.

Shh. Please don't talk so loudly. It's

the first time in my life. Then I should

be giving you lucky money. I've come here

for the sake of my work. I don't care

about the money. You meant all the same.

You don't change. You ain't here.

HuhSir,

so you've come.

HuhBuddha's name be phrase. Buddha's name

be phrase. Oh, my God. Please, think of

me a number like a man. Sir, where do you

usually go?Well,

I used to go everywhere. I met all kinds

of different people. Wow.

Is that so?Have

you ever been sick?I'm sure

we're all right. As long as we're

careful, we'll be quite safe.

Careful?How are we going to be careful?

Easy. I'll hand over once we've made

contact. Oh, so you

think you're pretty good. Hmm Well, I

have been studying it hard ever since I

was a child. Wow, you practice

hard. Actually, I've

specialized in all kinds of styles, and

I'm pretty good at all of them.

Then get your clothes off.

You look like you've got a big one.

Oh?How do you know?

Even with the clothes on, I can tell.

It's about two feet long. Two feet

long?You've got to be

kidding. Come on. Hold it.

Before we do make the deal, I want you to

show me some proof. If you do have a lump

on your body, then I would like to see

it. A lump?You mean a pear?

Bastard you can touch if you want.

Come on, touch me.

Aw, no need to be so shy.

Wow! Wow

It's such a big lump, but I can't see it.

Oh, my God. Dear Lord Buddha.

Not you two again. I might

have guessed it.

Ohh Come on, help me.

Oh. I'm sorry,

love.

Come on, lady. Keep it

up.

Keep it up, lady. Come

on. I'm going.

Oh, the box.

Come on. She's OK. Hey, you dirty

old man. Stop looking. Come on. What a

waste. It's such a great view.

Oh, hey, hold it, it's me! Ohh

Oh, come on, Betty, damn you!

No, no,

don't!

I'll get it, I'll get

it! Come on! Ohh

Oh, this is good.

Oh, give me

the box.

I got the box. Let go. Hey, Freddy, will

you help me?I can't move. Oh,

try and get over here, will you?I can.

Come on, move it. She's passed

out. I'll take that. Bring her with you

there. Come along, lad. Give me your

hand. I will, but she

can. Hurry it up, Betty.

What's going on?

Betty, get her off. Get

the box. Get the box. Why do you hit me?

I'm sorry. Never mind, but I'm not used

to the floor. Oh,

come

on. Leave her.

Leave her with him.

I got it. Now get the box.

Take him out. There we go. I get the box.

Come on. All right. What's he doing?Oh,

you are a monk. Listen, if I don't get

customers, I'm going to blame you. We'll

take the box. Yeah. You

two are always after my box.

I'm sure if you knew what was really

inside. You wouldn't be interested. Don't

say that. If you give it to us, we'll use

it. Of course, we still want it. Hmm,

Paul, let me show you.

Nothing much, except books. A

racing form.

Ah If you two will be patient here,April

15th. You can have both of these charms.

Worth anything?More than 100 years old.

You ready to give them to us?Yes, will

you?Up to you if you want it.

Hey, what do you think?What do you think?

The statue and the charm will fetch a

bit. But if we do it, Are you sure he'll

keep his promise?You're right.

We get hold of that box. We'll have some

money. Mm-hmmBut if we shop him, we'll be

really rich. You can't ask me to do that.

You leave it to me. Hey, where are you

going?Going to the cops.

Who the hell do you think you are?Look,

you tell me. Who's the guy who runs

things around here?I guess it's Captain

Wang. Well, if we hand the monk over to

him, what good's that going to do us?

He'll give us a reward. We should get

more than that. What kind of reward?

Any idea?You want to know?Follow me. Hey,

where's the bill?

Are you quite certain?Yes, I'm quite

certain. It's my guess he's

still here. The monk must still be in

town. How should

we take him?Alive.

Oh, Peng wouldn't talk even under heavy

torture. I want that

monk alive. At least we can make him

talk. But then we don't

know where the monk is. Excuse me,

Captain. They're two young fellas outside

of something to report. Yeah, we get them

every day. All I want's money. Send them

away. But Captain, they said they got

something on the monk.

Hey, it's the Captain. Captain. Captain.

I gather you two want to see me. Not only

that, we're here to help. How do you?Hey,

let them talk first. Oh, hello,

Miss. We've seen a monk.

What about him?Oh, he has a box. Oh,

what's in the box?Oh, I think the box.

The box. Oh, and I I think that. And what

do you want?I want to be a cop. And you?

And a gun. Oh, that's easily

fixed. My car. Yes, Sir. These two are

for security guard. Give them both an

armband. Yes, Sir. The

gun. Holy cowards. We're

guns. After all, we're Kung Fu

fighters. We don't use guns. Now,

tell me all about this monkey of yours, eh

Now, I don't talk too much about him, but

he doesn't know Kung Fu. What do you mean?

You tell him. You tell him.

All right. Where can I find him?

Where is this monk?Nut monk. Where is he?

Captain, if I do tell you, you won't kill

him, will you?

I don't usually kill people. Let's

go inside and have some tea and tuck it

over. Right, sure. Right, sure. Hmm

Where are you going?Oh, I'm going into

town. I'll be back soon. What will I tell

him if you aren't back?Hey, just don't

tell him anything at all. You understand?

I'll be back. Hey, but that.

What's the big idea, you idiot?

Hey, you. Come on. I like this song. That

makes me feel good. Hey, heyYou see

my gun, ehHey, where'd you get it?Cos it

ain't real. Hey, don't talk so loudly.

Even if it isn't real, it still looks

real. Yeah, I guess you're right. Hey,

I'm hungry. What do you say we eat?Grab

us a bite.

How about this place, then?Right, I got

no money, though. Oh, things are

different now. We don't need money with

these armbands. Hey, that's right.

Come

on. She's reserved, but you can't sit

there. What?Why not?That's right.

Why can't we?God, it's reserved. Resert?

For who?Chandaman. Well, he won't be

needing it now. Do you see this armband?

Now stop troubling us. Come on. Right.

Oh, God damn you. God

damn it. I know you all too well.

You know what this means?

You know what this means?And this

means how's that?

I think he's made his meaning clear. This

country's at war right now, and I'm ready

to use this chopper on you too.

Wait up.

What do you want?Give us two bowls of

duck noodles. We want the best duck and

only use the left leg. And we don't want

any bill. Two duck noodles.

And give us a pot of tea.

It'll be long now. Hey, it's a bit nicer

now. Yeah.

Hey, where's the duck?In the noodles.

So small. Hey, is this Chuck Cribble?

People like you wear your own pants like

your bully for. Now you've eaten our

foot. Very

good. I think we'll go now. Let's

go. Sit down.

Hey, before you leave here.

Yes, pay. But what about a discount?

My God, they advertise a discount on

Sundays.

Bastards

Hey! Hey, hey, you! What are you bullying

these people for?Ohh Did you see

that?He hit you, you're right. Go and

arrest him. Right.

Hold it!

Even your captain doesn't dare touch me.

Who do you think you are?If you weren't

wearing those official armbands, I'd have

shot both of you. All right, take him

away. Yes, sir. Hold it. Come on, getout.

You can't let him get away with that.

Let's go get it. Right. Let's get it.

Hold on. Don't stop me. Hey, do you want

to get killed?Even our own captain has to

do what he says. You can't go against

him. Everyone's afraid of him. Even

Captain Wang too. We're afraid of his

guns. Come on.

Captain Wayne wants us to track down that

treacherous monk. Now go,

Captain. Captain. What are we wearing

these armbands for when they're worth

nothing?What's the point?So we got no

guns, but we can still wear the bands.

Take it off.

Don't you see it's because of the bands.

Did everybody so again, everybody so

against us.

Hey, do we really have to turn the monk

in?Oh, I know. The monk's always been

very nice to us. He taught me some Kung

Fu, too. But we have no choice. It's the

only way to go. It's all because of you.

But don't talk so much. Let's go inside

and see if the monk's in there.

Umm Soso, wait for the monk. Don't

know. Soso, it's urgent. We see him.

You two want to see him?Are you sure

nothing's wrong?Hey, it's urgent.

Matter of life and death. All

right. You don't tell us. You'll be dead.

Cao Cao, you should tell us if you know.

He said he went for a walk in town. A

walk in town.

Where'd he go?What'd he say?I said,

what's on your mind?Oh, I was just

thinking of where the monk could have got

to. Hey, I've got it. I think I know just

where the monk has gone to. Come with me.

Oh, OK. Could you walk a bit faster?All

right. Maybe he's gone to that oldtemple.

There he is. Hey, you're right. What are

you 2 fellas doing here?You have no place

to go. It was a safe guess. We reckon

you'd be here. That's right. You had to

be here. All right, all rightBut I was

worried about where you two guys had

gone. So I came looking for you. Or have

you forgotten?Today's April 15th. Right

now, I want you to take me to beat the

man. I've got to keep the rendezvous.

Monk Tin Fu, you you

Chao Ma. It's the first time you ever

call me Tin Fu. Reverend, I I

Well, what is it then?Go ahead and tell

him. Reverend, I have something to tell

you. HuhI have something to tell you as

well. I have something to deliver.

But it isn't silver or gold.

It's only a map. A map.

It shows the distribution of Japanese

forces. It'll be a vital help to our

side. If they can get it, it could help

defeat the JapsOh, this is mainly because

of some measly map. I promise.

I deliver it. Call yourself Chinese.

Certainly. Tell me, are

the Japs invading our country?Yes.

Are the Japanese soldiers?That's right.

Well, this map will help the Chinese

people. Maybe save lives. If the Japs

get it back, do you think that's helpful?

Of course it isn't. Now you both

understand.

Reverend, it's like this, you see. Let me

tell it. We've been to Captain Wang to

report you. Captain Wang said to

keep an eye on you. So we came. So we

came out because. Came out because.

Well, now we know. We know we're wrong.

So tell us what to do now. Yes, tell us.

Well, let's find a place to hide.

Till that comes. Oh, yeah.

Tell me, on your way here, did anyone

follow you?There they are.

You two bastardsYou've tried to betray

us. And who are you?Two agents working

with Captain Wing. You're not going to

get away. Get him, right. Come on,

man. I went out to fight him.

Ohh

You should not have killed

him! Shut up! It's our

journey to China to

lay down

lives that others might live

in peace!Hey, you did that well. Shut up,

will ya?Dragon! Yah!

Hey, Ciao, mom! I'll take revenge for

you!

Great, great. Fantastic. Wonderful.

Thank God you're alive. Otherwise, you'd

never have killed them. If you hadn't

killed them, we would all be dead. These

guys aren't worth bothering about. Enough

talk. Let's go. Hold it. I've got to get

the bucks. They're stupid.

Attention, monk inside. We've got the

whole place around it. You can't get

away. But if you're smart, you'll come

out quietly. Otherwise, we'll open fire.

You hear me?

But they've all got guns. What do we do?

Come on, Reverend. What are we going to

do now?You realize if we

go out, the vehicles will die. You

only want me. You can stay here.

Tell you what. You two arrest me. What

about tonight?You'll have to represent me

at the rendezvous. Look for the man with

the lump on his back. Give him the box.

Hey, have you got that?Afterwards, you

have to leave town. He has to open the

box and take them out.

You better see where I put it. I'll put

the box behind the Buddha.

Listen, monk, if you don't come outside

now, we'll come in shooting and you'll

all die. We got it. We got it. We got it.

Don't shoot. You've arrested the mile.

We're on him. Captain.

He's done a good job. You see, we got the

monk for you. Where's my car?

My car was killed by the monk. We're

looking to get her alive. HuhYou mean

he's killed my car?Then you two have done

very well.

Hey, bring the monk over here. Yeah.

Mr. Cotton. We've got the monk at last.

Bring him here. Yes. Come on.

Where's the map?Why have you had net?

What map?What do you mean?God

damn it, you fool. Do you want to

die?I'm a monk in here taught

not to fear death. Go ahead, kill me.

Hey, Mr.

Kongtin, he will be of no use to you if

he's dead. Why not leave him to me?I have

ways of making men talk, and I assure you

he's going to talk. That's right. Umm

All right, bring them over. Bring them

over. Remember,

if you fail to get that map. Don't come

to me for help. You got that?Yes.

No, that!

Yes, sir.

Hey, what's gonna happen to the monk?

We'll wait and see. Mm-hmm

Union, do you really think that those two

guys did arrest the monk?If you don't

think so, that means those two have

betrayed us. When we go back, we should

lock up the monk together with the spy.

and give those two an opportunity to

rescue them. Good idea. What do you think?

Hey, smart thinking. Let's go. Ohh

Hey! Has the monk talked yet?

Captain Wagon, this monk's a tough bird.

He's never gonna talk.

Come here.

Go on. He's calling you. But

you try asking the monk for me where he's

hitting the secret map. But you tortured

him. He's refused to talk. If I should

ask him, it won't be out of use. Nobody

alive can stand torture like this. He'll

soon talk. But I go on.

Hey, Mum, better talk. I'm going to burn

you. That is up to you.

All right, I'll do it.

Aye, I'll do it. I'm

sure he's going to talk to us now.

No, no,

no

Soldier. Wake him up. Sir.

Are you going to talk?No.

I worry if you don't talk. You're dead.

I'll talk to you personally. Soldier.

Better

bring him up now.

Monk, why'd he insist on suffering?He'd

better talk to us now. Yeah, you. With a

man like this, you don't wish your

sympathy. Soldier, Sir, turn away and

drown him. Yes, Sir.

If we do drown the monk, we're never

going to get that in that. Maybe we

should keep him alive. But if so, yes,

that's right. There's no point in

drowning him. Yeah, there's no point. All

right, better bring him up now. Thank

you, sir. Hurry! Get him out!

Get him out! Better clear this

mess.

Open the door.

Hey, all right, take it easy.

You ever suffered much, but you still

didn't talk. You're a brave man. Now what

nonsense. You're going to have

company. A brave man like you

deserves to have a break.

Come fool. Yes, Sir. Bring that monk over

here, will you?I've

brought you some company. But

don't you get any bright ideas. I've had

a new lock specially fitted. Soldier.

Lock him up. You

can have a good talk.

You should be proud. You've both done

very well. Thank you. Ohh

Here's some money for you. Enjoy

yourselves. Thank you. Go on now.

Go on,

have a bite.

Hey, this is Mushroom Lane. Oh, you're

right. Why?Why is

no one here?Take it easy. Wait here.

How about if I rescue the monk?You can

wait here. Think you can do it?Of course

I can do it. Hey, if I meet this fella

and you rescue the monk, where are we

going to meet?Meet me at the old

temple. OK, Shama. Be

careful. Don't worry.

Better find out who he is.

My friend, how's the weather in Chungking?

We're in Canton. How can

I tell you?He doesn't know the

code. I got the late shift, I guess.

Hey, you the ninth entry?Yeah. Jam once,

you're to go now. Right, I'll go.

Hey, how's the monk doing?All right. Hmm

HuhShow them off. Mr.

Reverend, how you doing?I'm fine. Take

these chains off. Right.

HuhThere's no keyhole, huh

You can't open that lock unless you break

it up. Chop up his hand. I know you,

you bastardYeah, I'll chop up your

hand.

No.

Now give me your hand, huhCome on.

Hey, give him your hand.

Here.

How come you have a lump on your back?

What about it?I have no secrets. The date?

April 15th. And the place?Mushroom Lane.

Oh, so we're brothers after all. Why

didn't you say earlier?Why didn't you say?

All right. That's enough talking for now.

Come on, let's go.

Hey, Miss. You still sitting

there?It's Molly now. Why don't you go on

home?My girlfriend lives over there.

She's got to open the door. That house.

Yeah, that's right. You know. Nice girl.

Hey, you get out of here right now,

because that's my house. Lucky you can

run. That lying bitch must have been

cheating me. Oh,

my God.

That's

strange. Xiaolong isn't here. HuhNot here?

That's right. Too bad. Hey, you guys take

the lock off. I'm going to go look for

him. I've sashed all around, but he isn't

here. Oh, maybe

Fat Dragon. He's betrayed us. Yeah, he

wouldn't do that. But we did a race and

we'd meet later at the temple on the

hill. So let's go. Let's

go.

Hey, how are you?I'm OK.

Are you all right?Just fine. Put on my

clothes. Here.

Reverend, he's not here either. Oh,

you better go check the box.

Hey, Reverend, Reverend, the box is

gone. The box is

gone. Maybe Fat Dragon. Don't think so.

Here's your box over here,

BastardYou're not as smart as you think.

Where's that dragon?Dragon?

He's enjoying his cell. Ohh

Hand it over now.

We want that map. If you do hand it

over, we'll let Dragon live. You've

fallen into my trap. You see, that's

Fat Dragon's twin brother. Fat Dragon

himself has gone with the map.

But I look like my brother.

Buckle the door!

Come on, come on

You won't get away. If you're smart,

you'll hand over that map. That's right.

If you give us the map, we'll see you all

go free. I don't trust anything you say.

We have to succeed. Whatever happens, we

must get the man we're going to do. What

do we do?Greg and you better get out of

here. There's so many. How can I?

The wall?Well, it's far too high. I've

got an idea.

Can't stand it. Hurry up, will you?I'll

move back. And what about me?

Stretch out your head.

Don't let them escape. Come quickly.

We're going to leave. Don't wait. Let's

wait for them. Hurry up. Come on. Give me

your hair. Go ahead without

me. He told us to leave. Come on. All

right.

They're getting away.

Get

out

of

here quickly!

Oh, wait. You're running too fast. I

can't keep up with you. I can't run. Oh,

my God. They'll be coming soon. Oh, I

can't take much more. Let's rest a while.

Oh.

Hey, Fatty. Somebody's coming. Let's take

a look. Hey,

I think I can hear two men. Oh, it must

be there. Let's look.

Hey,

don't

take him off.

I can't

say

that more.

Yeah

Reverend, don't let him come over.

Sharma, don't let her come over.

I'm

not going to let you go, but you know.

White dragon, why did you let it down?Huh

You damned idiot. Don't beg for mercy.

Don't be a coward. I'd rather die.

Great to see you scab me.

What?You.

You tricked me. It isn't

real blood.

Oh, this.

Huh

Dragon! Dragon!

Hey! Hey Hey No, no,

no Ow! Pear bandages won't! Right!

Yah! Call yourself Chinese.

By betraying your country, you've done

great harm. If the Japanese had got that

map, many Chinese would have died.

HuhYah!

Hey, dragon, are you all right?I'm

fine. At least I'm alive.

Do you think they will give me a medal?

Yeah.

Don't forget that we

agreed if we get

any rewards.

What the rule is?You go first.

I'll follow. I'll support

you.

Dragon. Go on. Give him a hand, right?

We use a gun.

Come on. Come back here. Those filthy

traders will tear them apart. Come on.

Come on

oh How do you feel?

Reverend... Kill the

traitors!

You damn traitor!

Come

on!

You. What?

WhatNo.

This knife is only used for

suicide. let you...

Sharma, please don't die. What am I

going to do without you?Just take it

easy. What's happened to the map?It's

still in the temple. Oh, quickly go and

get it.

Wait for me. Wait for me.