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1
00:00:03,545 --> 00:00:06,338
- Hey.
- Hey. Wow, it is true what they say:
2
00:00:06,506 --> 00:00:08,298
Pregnant bellies look like a drum.
3
00:00:10,844 --> 00:00:12,011
Ha, ha.
4
00:00:12,178 --> 00:00:16,765
Well, it's just I'm so pregnant
that my guitar doesn't fit anymore.
5
00:00:16,933 --> 00:00:19,768
So I thought, till I'm not,
I'm gonna play my songs on this drum.
6
00:00:19,936 --> 00:00:21,645
It sounds really cool.
7
00:00:21,813 --> 00:00:25,274
Listen, listen. Ahem. Okay.
8
00:00:25,942 --> 00:00:29,319
[SINGING]
Smelly cat, smelly cat
9
00:00:29,487 --> 00:00:32,906
What are they feeding you?
10
00:00:38,913 --> 00:00:40,122
Wow, Pheebs, that sounds great.
11
00:00:40,290 --> 00:00:43,709
I know, I know! And I've only been playing
for, like, an hour.
12
00:00:45,920 --> 00:00:48,881
- Phoebe. Phoebe. Hi.
- Hey.
13
00:00:49,049 --> 00:00:50,090
What are you doing here?
14
00:00:50,258 --> 00:00:52,593
Um, actually I came down
to ask you a big favor.
15
00:00:52,761 --> 00:00:56,513
Oh, well, don't tell me you want to keep
more of your stuff in my uterus.
16
00:00:56,681 --> 00:00:57,890
[CHUCKLES]
17
00:00:58,767 --> 00:01:02,394
No, no, no. Okay. Now, see. Ahem.
18
00:01:02,562 --> 00:01:04,938
I want to name the girl baby Leslie.
19
00:01:05,106 --> 00:01:08,734
And, um, Frank wants to name
one of the boy babies...
20
00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:10,694
...Frank Jr., Jr.
21
00:01:12,530 --> 00:01:13,989
Wouldn't that be Frank III?
22
00:01:14,365 --> 00:01:16,200
Don't get me started.
23
00:01:17,786 --> 00:01:20,120
Anyway, um,
since there are three babies...
24
00:01:20,288 --> 00:01:23,624
...and, um, we both got
to put our names in...
25
00:01:23,792 --> 00:01:27,336
...we would be truly honored
if you would name the other boy baby.
26
00:01:27,504 --> 00:01:29,129
Oh, wow.
27
00:01:29,297 --> 00:01:31,673
- That's so nice. Oh, oh!
- Ha, ha.
28
00:01:31,841 --> 00:01:32,883
Cougar.
29
00:01:34,969 --> 00:01:36,220
You think about it.
30
00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:32,359
I left a bra drying on the shower rod.
31
00:02:32,610 --> 00:02:35,445
You don't think your son
will think it's yours and be traumatized?
32
00:02:35,613 --> 00:02:38,323
Hey, Mommy can have a wife.
Daddy can have a bra.
33
00:02:38,491 --> 00:02:39,908
[CHUCKLES]
34
00:02:40,869 --> 00:02:42,119
Oh, it's time to go.
35
00:02:42,287 --> 00:02:44,746
Oh, no, no, no.
See, that clock's a little fast.
36
00:02:44,914 --> 00:02:48,041
Uh, we still have 17 minutes.
37
00:02:48,209 --> 00:02:51,295
Huh. What can we do in 17 minutes...
38
00:02:51,462 --> 00:02:52,754
...twice?
39
00:02:53,715 --> 00:02:55,924
Well, that's ambitious.
40
00:02:56,092 --> 00:02:57,634
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
41
00:02:57,802 --> 00:03:00,596
- Okay, you can ignore that.
- That's Carol with your son.
42
00:03:00,763 --> 00:03:02,931
Uh, believe me, when he's older,
he'll understand.
43
00:03:03,099 --> 00:03:04,183
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
44
00:03:04,350 --> 00:03:07,477
CAROL: Ross.
- I'll be right there.
45
00:03:11,900 --> 00:03:16,028
- Hello. Hello. Hey.
- Hi.
46
00:03:16,196 --> 00:03:18,030
Uh, Emily, this is Carol and Susan.
47
00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:21,366
- Hey, it's so nice to finally meet you.
- You too.
48
00:03:21,534 --> 00:03:24,328
Susan's gonna be shooting a commercial
in London next week.
49
00:03:24,495 --> 00:03:26,079
I'm so excited. I've never been there.
50
00:03:26,247 --> 00:03:28,081
- Oh, well, I'll show you around.
SUSAN: Great.
51
00:03:28,249 --> 00:03:31,752
Also, I was hoping to catch a show.
So if you can make any suggestions...
52
00:03:31,920 --> 00:03:33,754
Oh, there's tons of terrific stuff.
53
00:03:34,339 --> 00:03:36,256
- I'll go with you.
- Oh.
54
00:03:36,424 --> 00:03:37,507
Oh, I'm sorry.
55
00:03:38,343 --> 00:03:40,802
Oh. Look at you two bonding.
56
00:03:40,970 --> 00:03:44,264
- Making us late for the airport so...
- Are you all right?
57
00:03:44,432 --> 00:03:47,976
Oh, he's fine, he's fine. It's just
us getting along is difficult for him...
58
00:03:48,144 --> 00:03:50,646
...because he doesn't like me.
59
00:03:50,813 --> 00:03:52,564
Ha, ha. Come on. That's...
60
00:03:52,732 --> 00:03:53,941
It's true.
61
00:03:59,364 --> 00:04:02,032
- Hi.
- Hey. Hey, do we have a baby name yet?
62
00:04:02,200 --> 00:04:04,451
Ugh, no. It's so hard.
63
00:04:04,619 --> 00:04:07,079
I went through this whole book
and found nothing.
64
00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:10,874
I want a name that's really, like,
you know, strong and confident.
65
00:04:11,042 --> 00:04:12,960
You know? Like Exxon.
66
00:04:15,129 --> 00:04:17,673
Well, it certainly worked
for that Valdez kid.
67
00:04:18,633 --> 00:04:22,886
Oh, oh, Pheebs. You want a strong name?
How about The Hulk?
68
00:04:24,097 --> 00:04:25,764
No, I'm not sure about Hulk...
69
00:04:25,932 --> 00:04:28,684
...but I like the idea
of a name starting with "The."
70
00:04:29,811 --> 00:04:32,521
Well, you want a good name,
heh, go with Joey.
71
00:04:32,689 --> 00:04:34,523
Joey's your pal, Joey's your buddy.
72
00:04:34,816 --> 00:04:37,109
Where is everybody?
They're hanging out with Joey.
73
00:04:38,695 --> 00:04:40,529
Know what?
If you're gonna name him Joey...
74
00:04:40,697 --> 00:04:42,572
...you should name him Chandler.
75
00:04:43,449 --> 00:04:46,994
Oh, come on, Chandler's funny,
he's sophisticated, and he's very lovable...
76
00:04:47,161 --> 00:04:49,538
...once you get to know him.
77
00:04:49,706 --> 00:04:52,040
Hey, Joey's lovable too.
78
00:04:52,208 --> 00:04:55,669
But the thing about Joey is,
if you need him, he'll be there.
79
00:04:55,837 --> 00:05:00,090
Chandler will be there for you too.
I mean, he might be a little late...
80
00:05:00,258 --> 00:05:02,884
...but he'll be there.
And he'll bring you some cold soda...
81
00:05:03,052 --> 00:05:06,513
...if what you need him for
is that you're really hot.
82
00:05:07,557 --> 00:05:09,349
What do you say? What do you say?
83
00:05:09,517 --> 00:05:14,062
Well, I like the idea of naming him
after someone I love.
84
00:05:14,230 --> 00:05:17,316
And Joey and Chandler
are both great names.
85
00:05:23,072 --> 00:05:24,573
All right, I don't...
86
00:05:24,741 --> 00:05:26,867
Maybe I will just name him The Hulk.
87
00:05:28,494 --> 00:05:32,622
I knew I shouldn't have mentioned it.
That's what I wanted to name my kid.
88
00:05:35,460 --> 00:05:38,587
Hey, Mon? If you were hoping to sleep
with Joshua for the first time tonight...
89
00:05:38,755 --> 00:05:40,839
...which one of these
would you want to be wearing?
90
00:05:41,007 --> 00:05:44,968
You know what? It really creeps me out
choosing other people's sex clothes.
91
00:05:45,636 --> 00:05:48,597
Sorry. I'm just so excited.
92
00:05:48,765 --> 00:05:51,558
I've been waiting for this for months.
I got my hair colored.
93
00:05:51,726 --> 00:05:55,354
I got new sheets.
I'm making him a very fancy meal.
94
00:05:55,521 --> 00:05:57,230
What am I making him, by the way?
95
00:05:57,690 --> 00:06:02,069
Well, you're making him a frisée salad
with goat cheese and pine nuts...
96
00:06:02,236 --> 00:06:06,073
...wild rice, roasted asparagus
and salmon en croute.
97
00:06:06,616 --> 00:06:08,450
I thought I was making him filet mignon.
98
00:06:09,911 --> 00:06:13,663
Yeah, you were, but you decided to make
salmon because you had some left over.
99
00:06:13,831 --> 00:06:17,042
And then you realized if you bitched
about it, then you would stop cooking...
100
00:06:17,210 --> 00:06:21,254
...and you would have to make your
famous baked potato and Diet Coke.
101
00:06:22,465 --> 00:06:25,050
Wow, I really get crabby when I cook.
102
00:06:27,595 --> 00:06:28,637
- Hey.
- Hey.
103
00:06:28,805 --> 00:06:30,055
BOTH:
Hey.
104
00:06:30,223 --> 00:06:32,307
So, uh, Emily called last night.
105
00:06:32,475 --> 00:06:34,351
And now you're giving me the message?
106
00:06:38,606 --> 00:06:42,317
Turns out that Emily
is just crazy about Susan.
107
00:06:42,485 --> 00:06:46,154
Yeah.
They're going to the theater together.
108
00:06:46,322 --> 00:06:48,657
They're going to dinner.
109
00:06:48,825 --> 00:06:51,076
They're going horseback riding.
110
00:06:52,036 --> 00:06:54,704
God, Susan is so fun.
111
00:06:57,792 --> 00:07:00,710
Look, this is just a little too familiar.
112
00:07:00,878 --> 00:07:04,172
Okay, for, like, six months
before Carol and I split up...
113
00:07:04,340 --> 00:07:08,510
...all I heard was,
"My friend Susan is so smart.
114
00:07:08,678 --> 00:07:12,764
My friend Susan is so funny.
My friend Susan is so great."
115
00:07:13,724 --> 00:07:17,018
You actually think that something
could happen between Emily and Susan?
116
00:07:17,186 --> 00:07:20,063
Hey, they're going to the gym together.
117
00:07:21,649 --> 00:07:23,066
Two women...
118
00:07:23,234 --> 00:07:24,860
...stretching.
119
00:07:25,736 --> 00:07:28,572
You know, they take a steam together,
things get a little playful.
120
00:07:28,739 --> 00:07:30,490
Didn't you see Personal Best?
121
00:07:30,658 --> 00:07:32,659
No, but I'm gonna.
122
00:07:34,912 --> 00:07:37,164
Hi. Hi. You're crazy.
123
00:07:37,790 --> 00:07:39,916
Okay, this is Emily. Emily is straight.
124
00:07:40,084 --> 00:07:41,126
How do you know?
125
00:07:41,294 --> 00:07:43,795
I mean, we thought Carol was straight
before I married her.
126
00:07:44,922 --> 00:07:47,966
Yeah, definitely.
I don't like the name Ross.
127
00:07:51,345 --> 00:07:53,889
What a weird way to kick me
when I'm down.
128
00:07:54,640 --> 00:07:57,058
No, no, I just meant for the baby.
129
00:07:57,602 --> 00:07:58,852
Oh.
130
00:08:00,104 --> 00:08:02,439
What's wrong with Ross?
131
00:08:02,607 --> 00:08:04,399
It's just, you know, something like this...
132
00:08:04,567 --> 00:08:06,818
...would never happen to The Hulk,
you know.
133
00:08:09,030 --> 00:08:10,614
Actually, that's not true.
134
00:08:10,781 --> 00:08:15,410
In The Incredible Hulk, number 72,
Dr. Bruce Banner found...
135
00:08:17,038 --> 00:08:20,499
You know, never mind.
My girlfriend's a lesbian.
136
00:08:23,294 --> 00:08:26,463
So I decided I'm definitely gonna go
with either Joey or Chandler.
137
00:08:26,631 --> 00:08:28,215
- Oh.
- Oh, oh, oh.
138
00:08:28,382 --> 00:08:30,175
You gotta pick Joey.
139
00:08:30,343 --> 00:08:32,886
I mean, name one famous person
named Chandler.
140
00:08:33,304 --> 00:08:36,681
- Raymond Chandler.
- Someone you didn't make up.
141
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:40,936
Okay, there are no famous Joeys.
Except for, heh...
142
00:08:41,103 --> 00:08:42,521
...Joey Buttafuoco.
143
00:08:44,023 --> 00:08:46,566
- Yeah, that guy really hurt us.
PHOEBE: Yeah.
144
00:08:47,610 --> 00:08:50,111
Well, how about a compromise then?
Okay, what if it's...
145
00:08:50,279 --> 00:08:52,864
...you know, Chan-no-ey?
146
00:08:53,282 --> 00:08:56,743
Okay, look, Joey? Come on, think about it.
He'll never be president.
147
00:08:56,911 --> 00:08:59,371
I mean, there's never gonna be
a President Joey.
148
00:09:00,081 --> 00:09:02,207
All right, look,
I didn't want to bring this up.
149
00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:06,628
But Chandler is the stupidest name
I've heard in my life.
150
00:09:06,796 --> 00:09:09,214
It's not even a name.
It's barely even a word.
151
00:09:09,382 --> 00:09:11,758
Okay, it's kind of like chandelier
but it's not.
152
00:09:13,970 --> 00:09:18,473
All right? It's a stupid, stupid,
non-name.
153
00:09:21,894 --> 00:09:23,186
Wow.
154
00:09:23,980 --> 00:09:27,857
You're right.
I have a horrible, horrible name.
155
00:09:31,070 --> 00:09:34,155
I'm sorry, man. I didn't... I'm sorry.
156
00:09:35,157 --> 00:09:37,534
So I guess it's Joey, then. I mean...
157
00:09:45,626 --> 00:09:48,420
This is so nice.
Thank you for doing this.
158
00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:51,673
Oh. Please. Cooking soothes me.
159
00:09:56,387 --> 00:09:58,263
- So dig in.
- All right.
160
00:09:58,431 --> 00:10:01,474
- Well, it all looks so good.
- Mm.
161
00:10:02,184 --> 00:10:03,435
Mm.
162
00:10:04,645 --> 00:10:05,687
Oh, my God.
163
00:10:05,855 --> 00:10:08,189
Oh, I know. My God, this rice is so...
164
00:10:08,357 --> 00:10:10,400
I am so good.
165
00:10:11,235 --> 00:10:12,444
Behind you.
166
00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:13,737
[QUACKING AND CLUCKING]
167
00:10:13,904 --> 00:10:17,866
Oh, yeah, sorry. They used to live here,
and sometimes they migrate back over.
168
00:10:19,035 --> 00:10:22,871
Is there, uh...? Is there some way
that they could, uh, not be here?
169
00:10:23,039 --> 00:10:25,832
It's just that, uh, farm birds
really kind of freak me out.
170
00:10:26,876 --> 00:10:30,045
- Yeah. Okay, okay.
- Okay, great.
171
00:10:30,212 --> 00:10:32,339
Here we go. Here we go. Whoa.
172
00:10:33,507 --> 00:10:35,592
- Whoa.
- Oh, sorry.
173
00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:37,927
There you go.
174
00:10:46,896 --> 00:10:49,397
Hey. How'd you do that?
175
00:10:49,565 --> 00:10:50,899
Come on.
176
00:10:52,985 --> 00:10:54,694
- All gone.
- Heh.
177
00:10:54,862 --> 00:10:56,154
So, farm birds, huh?
178
00:10:56,322 --> 00:10:59,574
Yeah, it's my only weird thing, I swear.
179
00:10:59,742 --> 00:11:03,662
And I would have told you about it
but I didn't know that they'd be here.
180
00:11:03,829 --> 00:11:07,916
- Oh.
- So, uh, ahem.
181
00:11:08,542 --> 00:11:11,211
- Ha, ha.
- Okay.
182
00:11:11,379 --> 00:11:13,838
So can I serve you a little...
183
00:11:14,006 --> 00:11:15,298
What, what, what?
184
00:11:15,466 --> 00:11:20,011
Nothing. Uh, it's just that I know
that they're still out there.
185
00:11:21,681 --> 00:11:24,849
They're across the hall.
I mean, that's two doors away.
186
00:11:25,017 --> 00:11:28,812
It's gonna take them a long time
to peck their way back over here.
187
00:11:28,979 --> 00:11:30,438
[CHUCKLES]
188
00:11:30,606 --> 00:11:32,565
That's not funny.
189
00:11:33,275 --> 00:11:35,777
- Uh...
- Okay, you know...
190
00:11:35,945 --> 00:11:39,406
Would you feel better
if we went someplace else?
191
00:11:39,573 --> 00:11:43,451
I mean, we could pack all this stuff up
and, you know, go to your apartment.
192
00:11:43,619 --> 00:11:45,745
Oh, they're working on it this week.
It's a mess.
193
00:11:45,913 --> 00:11:48,915
But, uh, I'm staying at my parents' house.
We could go there.
194
00:11:49,083 --> 00:11:50,709
- Your parents'?
- They're out of town.
195
00:11:50,876 --> 00:11:52,585
Oh.
196
00:11:52,753 --> 00:11:56,673
It's a huge place,
and it's got this gorgeous view of the park.
197
00:11:56,841 --> 00:11:58,341
It'd be very, very romantic.
198
00:11:58,801 --> 00:12:02,387
- What do you say?
- Yeah, that works.
199
00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:03,805
[DUCK QUACKING]
200
00:12:04,682 --> 00:12:06,015
They can smell the fear.
201
00:12:09,228 --> 00:12:10,270
BOTH:
Hey.
202
00:12:10,438 --> 00:12:11,563
How's Ben?
203
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:15,233
Well, I asked him if he wanted to eat.
He said no.
204
00:12:15,401 --> 00:12:17,777
I asked him if he wanted to sleep.
He said no.
205
00:12:17,945 --> 00:12:20,905
I asked what he wanted to do.
He said no.
206
00:12:21,073 --> 00:12:22,782
So he's sweeping.
207
00:12:23,451 --> 00:12:26,161
Hey, buddy. Hey.
208
00:12:26,328 --> 00:12:29,289
So, um, any word from Susan?
209
00:12:29,457 --> 00:12:32,792
Ooh, yeah, she said she's having
so much fun with Emily.
210
00:12:32,960 --> 00:12:34,919
Uh-huh, uh-huh.
211
00:12:36,255 --> 00:12:39,966
Uh, by the by,
did it ever occur to you that...
212
00:12:40,134 --> 00:12:44,179
...I don't know, maybe they might
be having a little too much fun?
213
00:12:44,346 --> 00:12:45,638
What's too much fun?
214
00:12:45,806 --> 00:12:49,309
You know, the kind of fun you
and Susan had when we were married.
215
00:12:50,561 --> 00:12:52,687
Oh, my God. You are so paranoid.
216
00:12:52,855 --> 00:12:54,481
- Am I?
- Yes.
217
00:12:54,648 --> 00:12:56,191
Am I?
218
00:12:56,692 --> 00:12:57,817
I can't speak for Emily...
219
00:12:57,985 --> 00:13:00,612
...but Susan is in a loving,
committed relationship.
220
00:13:00,780 --> 00:13:03,740
Uh-huh. Carol, so were we.
221
00:13:03,908 --> 00:13:06,701
All right, just imagine for a moment...
222
00:13:07,036 --> 00:13:10,246
...that Susan meets someone,
and they really hit it off.
223
00:13:10,414 --> 00:13:12,582
Say they're coming back
from the theater...
224
00:13:12,750 --> 00:13:15,376
...and they stop at a pub
for a couple of drinks.
225
00:13:15,544 --> 00:13:17,837
They're laughing, you know.
226
00:13:18,005 --> 00:13:20,381
Someone innocently touches
someone else.
227
00:13:21,300 --> 00:13:22,759
There's electricity.
228
00:13:22,927 --> 00:13:24,886
It's new. It's exciting.
229
00:13:25,054 --> 00:13:28,556
Are you telling me
there isn't even the slightest possibility...
230
00:13:28,724 --> 00:13:30,600
...of something happening?
231
00:13:32,144 --> 00:13:33,686
- Maybe.
- Oh, my God.
232
00:13:33,854 --> 00:13:36,898
I didn't really believe it
until you just said it.
233
00:13:41,529 --> 00:13:46,241
None of the other kids believed me,
I swear to God, that duck pushed me.
234
00:13:46,909 --> 00:13:50,078
Wow. This place is fabulous.
235
00:13:50,246 --> 00:13:53,122
Yeah, let me show you around.
This is the downstairs living room.
236
00:13:53,290 --> 00:13:55,124
There's two living rooms?
237
00:13:55,292 --> 00:14:00,046
God, growing up here, this place
must have been a real babe magnet.
238
00:14:00,214 --> 00:14:03,550
Yeah, well, it would have been,
but, uh, my parents just moved here.
239
00:14:03,717 --> 00:14:07,095
Well, you should know this place
is a real babe magnet.
240
00:14:07,471 --> 00:14:09,430
Want to make out?
241
00:14:11,308 --> 00:14:15,436
You know, here's an idea.
Why don't I put the food in the fridge...
242
00:14:15,604 --> 00:14:18,147
...and we can eat it later?
243
00:14:18,315 --> 00:14:20,275
- That sounds like a plan.
- Heh.
244
00:14:20,442 --> 00:14:23,403
Um, is there a place
that I could go freshen up?
245
00:14:23,571 --> 00:14:28,032
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Um, just down the hall
and, uh, second door to your left.
246
00:14:31,245 --> 00:14:34,205
- Oh, hi, darling.
- Mom, Dad, what are you guys doing here?
247
00:14:34,373 --> 00:14:38,293
- Oh, we cut the trip short.
- France sucks.
248
00:14:39,503 --> 00:14:43,172
Um, this may be a little weird,
but I've got a date here.
249
00:14:43,340 --> 00:14:44,632
Say no more.
250
00:14:44,800 --> 00:14:47,927
We'll just grab some food, take it
with us upstairs and be out of your hair.
251
00:14:48,095 --> 00:14:50,930
Oh, that'd be great.
So you didn't even get to Italy?
252
00:14:51,098 --> 00:14:53,016
Yep. Sucks.
253
00:14:59,940 --> 00:15:01,649
[PIANO PLAYS]
254
00:15:16,457 --> 00:15:18,291
Hi, you.
255
00:15:19,627 --> 00:15:21,669
Oh, my God.
256
00:15:21,837 --> 00:15:24,964
I know. I can do more than cook.
257
00:15:26,508 --> 00:15:27,592
Uh...
258
00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:28,927
[GASPS]
259
00:15:32,014 --> 00:15:34,766
I like her. She seems smart.
260
00:15:40,189 --> 00:15:42,607
Rachel, my parents.
261
00:15:42,775 --> 00:15:46,694
So nice to meet you. Hello, hello.
262
00:15:47,321 --> 00:15:52,450
Oh, Joshua, that $500 was for groceries.
263
00:15:53,994 --> 00:15:58,873
What, this? Oh, no. That's not what it is.
264
00:15:59,041 --> 00:16:00,875
Okay, I work in fashion.
265
00:16:01,043 --> 00:16:04,921
See, and this is a real dress, actually.
266
00:16:05,089 --> 00:16:08,174
They're wearing it in Milan.
267
00:16:08,342 --> 00:16:12,720
So part of my job is to wear the clothes
and then I see how people respond.
268
00:16:12,888 --> 00:16:17,767
And then I report back to my superiors
at Bloomingdale's, so...
269
00:16:17,935 --> 00:16:20,478
And obviously, in this case...
270
00:16:20,646 --> 00:16:23,398
...I am going to report back:
271
00:16:23,607 --> 00:16:26,734
"U.S.A. Not ready."
272
00:16:27,528 --> 00:16:29,570
- Maybe in L.A.
- Yes.
273
00:16:29,738 --> 00:16:32,824
- There you go.
- So have you kids eaten yet?
274
00:16:32,992 --> 00:16:35,535
Well, ahem, we were going to do that after.
I mean, um...
275
00:16:37,121 --> 00:16:38,997
- Next.
- Well, we're starving.
276
00:16:39,164 --> 00:16:41,791
Why don't we just all
go get something to eat?
277
00:16:41,959 --> 00:16:47,839
Yeah, well, ha, ha, no use wasting this baby
just lying around the house.
278
00:16:48,757 --> 00:16:51,384
- So we'll go eat.
RACHEL: Yeah.
279
00:16:51,552 --> 00:16:53,261
You'll wear that.
280
00:16:53,762 --> 00:16:56,764
We'll be eating and, of course,
you'll be wearing that.
281
00:16:58,976 --> 00:17:01,936
Dude, I am sorry about what I said.
282
00:17:02,104 --> 00:17:05,106
Nope, nope, you're right.
It is a ridiculous name.
283
00:17:05,983 --> 00:17:08,609
- It's not that bad.
- Yes, it is.
284
00:17:09,361 --> 00:17:12,321
From now on, I have no first name.
285
00:17:13,198 --> 00:17:16,451
So you're just Bing?
286
00:17:18,328 --> 00:17:20,288
I have no name.
287
00:17:21,040 --> 00:17:23,249
So, what are we supposed to call you?
288
00:17:23,500 --> 00:17:27,003
Okay, uh, for now, temporarily,
you can call me...
289
00:17:27,796 --> 00:17:29,172
...Clint.
290
00:17:30,466 --> 00:17:33,551
No way are you cool enough
to pull off "Clint."
291
00:17:33,719 --> 00:17:36,054
Okay, so, what name am I
cool enough to pull off?
292
00:17:36,221 --> 00:17:38,056
Um, Gene.
293
00:17:41,018 --> 00:17:44,228
It's Clint. It's Clint.
294
00:17:44,730 --> 00:17:46,647
- See you later, Gene.
PHOEBE: Bye, Gene.
295
00:17:47,900 --> 00:17:50,651
It's Clint. Clint!
296
00:17:53,572 --> 00:17:55,364
What's up with Gene?
297
00:17:59,411 --> 00:18:01,788
- You wore your nightie to dinner?
- Oh, yeah.
298
00:18:01,955 --> 00:18:05,833
And the best part though, was when
the waiter spilled water down my back.
299
00:18:06,001 --> 00:18:08,127
I jumped up and my boob popped out.
300
00:18:08,295 --> 00:18:10,088
- Oh, my God.
- Oh, no.
301
00:18:10,255 --> 00:18:12,090
Yeah, it's all right. I got nice boobs.
302
00:18:15,552 --> 00:18:17,804
So I just picked up
a message from Emily.
303
00:18:18,263 --> 00:18:21,390
She and Susan are going
to a poetry reading together.
304
00:18:21,558 --> 00:18:23,768
- So?
- So?
305
00:18:23,936 --> 00:18:25,728
Poetry?
306
00:18:25,896 --> 00:18:28,106
Susan's gay.
307
00:18:28,273 --> 00:18:30,608
They're being gay together.
308
00:18:31,610 --> 00:18:35,113
- Emily's straight.
- Oh, wake up.
309
00:18:36,573 --> 00:18:37,740
Wow.
310
00:18:37,908 --> 00:18:40,284
Carol really messed you up.
311
00:18:40,452 --> 00:18:41,869
Excuse me?
312
00:18:42,037 --> 00:18:48,292
She turned you into this untrusting,
crazy, jealous sycophant.
313
00:18:51,255 --> 00:18:54,757
All right, so I don't know what "sycophant"
means, but the rest is right.
314
00:18:55,884 --> 00:18:59,428
I don't know what you're talking about.
I am not a crazy, jealous person.
315
00:18:59,930 --> 00:19:00,972
Huh.
316
00:19:02,391 --> 00:19:04,475
- What?
- She's totally right.
317
00:19:04,643 --> 00:19:07,353
When we were together,
you got all freaked out about Mark...
318
00:19:07,521 --> 00:19:10,064
...and there was nothing going on.
- This makes sense.
319
00:19:10,274 --> 00:19:11,732
It does not.
320
00:19:11,900 --> 00:19:14,735
Sure it does. In high school,
you weren't jealous at all...
321
00:19:14,903 --> 00:19:17,697
...even though all your girlfriends
were cheating on you.
322
00:19:19,324 --> 00:19:22,743
All right, so up until '92, '93,
he was very trusting.
323
00:19:22,911 --> 00:19:26,539
Then '94 hit, Carol left him,
and bam. Paranoid City.
324
00:19:26,707 --> 00:19:27,999
RACHEL:
Yeah.
325
00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:29,500
Absolutely, absolutely.
326
00:19:29,668 --> 00:19:30,835
This is so much fun.
327
00:19:31,461 --> 00:19:33,880
This is not fun.
328
00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:37,842
Look, all we're trying to say is...
329
00:19:38,010 --> 00:19:41,637
...don't let what happened with Carol
ruin what you've got with Emily.
330
00:19:43,849 --> 00:19:45,850
The '92 Ross wouldn't.
331
00:19:51,231 --> 00:19:54,358
I still think I was right
about that whole Mark thing, though.
332
00:19:54,860 --> 00:19:58,154
Wha...? Well, you know what?
I hope Emily is a lesbian.
333
00:20:02,117 --> 00:20:03,492
[PHOEBE PLAYING DRUM]
334
00:20:04,786 --> 00:20:06,996
Drum roll.
335
00:20:07,331 --> 00:20:08,873
Okay. Okay.
336
00:20:09,124 --> 00:20:10,583
All right.
337
00:20:11,251 --> 00:20:15,463
Help. Am I a Mark or a John?
338
00:20:16,465 --> 00:20:19,300
Ehh, you're not tall enough to be a Mark.
339
00:20:19,801 --> 00:20:22,261
But you might make a good Barney.
340
00:20:24,014 --> 00:20:25,264
All right, look, I am serious.
341
00:20:25,432 --> 00:20:27,892
Tomorrow at 3:30,
I'm going to the courthouse.
342
00:20:28,060 --> 00:20:29,727
You're actually going through with this?
343
00:20:29,895 --> 00:20:32,647
Hey, look, this name has been
holding me back my entire life.
344
00:20:32,814 --> 00:20:36,651
Okay, it's probably why kids picked on me
and why I never do well with women.
345
00:20:36,818 --> 00:20:40,571
So as of 4:00 tomorrow, I'm either gonna be
Mark Johnson or John Markson.
346
00:20:42,157 --> 00:20:45,201
You've got problems because of you,
not your name.
347
00:20:47,329 --> 00:20:51,040
This has got to stop.
Chandler is a great name.
348
00:20:51,208 --> 00:20:52,875
In fact...
349
00:20:53,961 --> 00:20:55,461
Yes.
350
00:20:55,629 --> 00:20:58,839
I'm sorry, I know you really wanted me
to name the baby Joey.
351
00:20:59,007 --> 00:21:03,261
But... So I'm gonna name
the baby Chandler.
352
00:21:06,223 --> 00:21:07,265
Really?
353
00:21:07,432 --> 00:21:09,475
Yeah, but you have to
keep the name too.
354
00:21:09,810 --> 00:21:12,019
- Okay, thanks.
PHOEBE: Okay.
355
00:21:12,187 --> 00:21:14,146
- You want to hug it out?
- Yeah.
356
00:21:15,232 --> 00:21:17,566
- Yay, yay. Oh, yay!
CHANDLER: Yay.
357
00:21:17,734 --> 00:21:19,819
Okay, I'm gonna go tell
Frank and Alice right now.
358
00:21:19,987 --> 00:21:21,195
Okay.
359
00:21:22,281 --> 00:21:24,490
- Bye, Pheebs.
- Okay, bye.
360
00:21:25,075 --> 00:21:27,493
- Ha, ha.
- Oh.
361
00:21:37,879 --> 00:21:42,008
MAN [ON PA]:
Flight 004 is now arriving at Gate 17.
362
00:21:45,846 --> 00:21:48,139
- Nice luggage.
- I was going to say.
363
00:21:48,724 --> 00:21:51,559
- Hey.
- Hi.
364
00:21:52,728 --> 00:21:55,646
- I missed you.
- Oh, I missed you too.
365
00:21:55,814 --> 00:21:57,523
Thanks for everything, I had a great time.
366
00:21:57,691 --> 00:21:59,650
Oh, so did I.
367
00:22:01,278 --> 00:22:03,070
No tongue.
368
00:22:10,579 --> 00:22:12,580
[English - US - SDH]
26895