Original subtitles

It's typical for young people to admire rock stars.

For my sister, it was Cyndi Lauper.

For my brother, it was Bon Jovi.

Well, Jon, we look good.

For me, the rock star I a most was...

Albert Einstein.

Di playing the violin?

So?

He believe him formulate his theories.

So?

Einstein was arguably the greatest scientific mind

of the 20th century.

If music helpe help me.

So?

I got to go talk to my mom.

- Everything okay? - Yeah,

she's just got some problems she's dealing with.

Kins lunch?

- Ah, do I have to? - George?

Happy to.

Be right back.

What do y'all want for lunch?

Peanut butter and jelly, please.

Great. Missy?

Tuna salad on rye toast,

with slice...

Two PBJs, got it.

What is going on?

- Well... - Well, what?

- I'm trying to say it. - You woke me up.

Spill it or I'm going back to bed.

I'm pregnant.

I'm awake now.

- Synce by MementMori - -- www.aic7ed.com --

Are you sure?

Yes. I'm late.

- How late? - Two days.

Oh, two days. That's nothing.

Last time I was two the twins.

Last time I was two menopause.

Just trying to lighten the mood.

So do you have...

reason to think that you might be?

Well, we try to be safe, but... you know,

heat of the moment.

Still? After three ki that beer belly

- hanging over his pants? - Mom?

I think you might be getting way ahead of yourself.

I'm telling you, I just know.

You were also convinced that Georgie was gonna be a girl.

That's true.

Although he does have very pretty hair.

Hello.

Hi, Sheldon.

I'd like to learn to play the violin.

Really? Well, that's terrific.

Do you have any experience with stringed instruments?

Stringed instruments, no.

String theory, yes.

That was a joke. I'm a joker.

I think I have an old violin you can take home

and get the feel of.

That's great.

Thank you.

But I have to warn you,

it can be a frustrating instrument to learn.

- Can you play it? - Yes.

I'll be fine.

I don't see them.

Excuse me.

Where do you keep your pregnancy tests?

Mom.

Behind the counter at the pharmacy.

Thank you.

Wouliscreet?

She doesn't know it's for you.

Well, it sure isn't for you.

Come on.

Ow. No.

Well, go ahead.

- I can't. - Why not?

His daughter goes to Missy's school.

You are being ridiculous.

I the world knowing my business.

Okay, fine.

- Hello! - Oh!

Excuse me.

- Hi, can I help you? - Yes.

Uh, I need a... pregnancy test.

Sure.

We have a few options.

Hey, Connie.

Oh, hey, Brenda.

Oh, you-you pick.

Is that a pregnancy test?

Uh, yeah.

It's for me.

- Really? - Yes.

I come from a long line of really fertile women.

My mother had me when she was 57.

Can you believe it?

I don't think I can.

Dr. Sturgis anating

for some time and we really try to be careful,

but you know how it is.

Heat of the moment.

Hi, Mrs. Cooper!

Hi, Billy.

Are you playing hi-seek?

Um, yeah.

Don't tell anybody. Shh.

Bye, Mrs. Cooper!

Oh!

Thank you so much. Bye.

Wish me luck.

It's a bit worn. But it's fine for a beginner.

That was unpleasant.

It just takes some practice.

Very well. When is my first lesson?

I'm... pretty busy right now.

But I can give you this in the meantime.

Anyone Can Play Violin.

They don't set the bar very high.

You know what you neeo?

Yes.

How's it going?

It' stop talking.

Sorry.

Now it's too quiet. Say something.

I know you n't expect this,

and you still might not be, but...

but if it turns out you are...

I'm here for you.

Thanks, Mom.

You're not the one I'm worried about.

If I'm pregnant, George is gonna flip out.

I'm sure he would at first.

Then he woulown.

Take a few beers.

Maybe some malt liquor.

I suppose.

The truth is, he and I were both

freaked out about having twins.

But now I can't imagine life without them.

Well, see, there you are.

So, no matter what that test says,

you're gonna be okay.

You're right.

What's it say?

I'm gonna go buy that malt liquor.

To get started,

place your violin in rest position.

Your feet should be together.

Your right arm should be

over your instrument,

not touching the strings or the bridge.

Put your left hanoing?

What does it look like?

Like you're looking for another excuse

for kids to pick on you.

Now, you are ready to position your feet.

Zip your feet open an

with your left foot.

Your feet shouloing?

I was gonna watch DuckTales, but this looks funnier.

... proceer.

Hold your violin above the left foot

with the neck of the instrument pointing up.

Left foot, neck up.

Now rotate the neck of the instrument

counterclockwise, so that the neck points

at your left foot.

- Oh, boy. - I was right.

Bend your left elbow so that the violin

rests on your shoulder

an on the chin rest.

Now try.

See if you can hold your instrument

without your hands.

- Time yourself at this... - What's going on?

I'm learning to play the violin.

It's my new favorite show.

Once you feel you have control of your instrument,

try moving your han.

Repeat this procedure until you can position

your instrument comfortably and quickly.

He'll just be another minute.

Thank you.

- What's that about? - Oh...

just trying not to breathe the smoke in.

Come on.

It alrea my lungs.

This stuff is squeaky clean.

Well, still.

He's all yours, your highness.

All right.

Hey, Mare, what's up?

Other than the big guy.

God joke.

Actually, um, I coulance.

I got some news today,

and I'm not quite sure how I feel about it.

Of course. Sit.

Well... I am...

um...

with child.

That's wonderful!

Congratulations!

How far along are you?

Uh, coulown just a little?

I haven't exactly told George yet.

Got it. And why not?

It is his, right?

Of course.

Apologies.

Hey, I'm a pastor in a small town.

You wouldn't believe the juicy things I hear.

This just wasn't part of our plan.

Well, luckily... it's part of God's plan.

And let me tell you about another Mary

who n't know how to tell her husband she was expecting.

Aner than yours.

In order to practice this, move your bow

in a counterclockwise direction.

Keep your hand moving right with the tip of the bow.

For our next song,

"Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star,"

remember, posture is our most important thing.

Set, play.

Diid it!

I id.

And now we see how it helps my science.

Hmm.

Hmm...

Come on, think.

Probably needs more "Twinkle, Twinkle."

... for learning new songs.

You can play them along with me.

What the hell is that?

Sheldon's learning to play the violin.

Oh. Well, that's unfortunate.

Mm-hmm.

I'm gonna go change.

Hey, Dad.

Can you believe I only starteay?

I really can.

Hey, so there's something

I've been meaning to talk to you about.

Sure, what's up?

Now, before I say it, um,

I want to tell you a story of another Mary.

Um...

Okay, anytime...

Are you kiing me?

Keep your voice down.

Are you kiing me?

Look, I was a little thrown, too, but Pastor Jeff said...

Pastor Jeff?

Pastor Jeff knows before me?

Well, yeah, I nee someone to talk to,

- and, you know, my mom... - Your mom?

Shh!

Does the whole damn town know?

No. Just my mom and Pastor Jeff.

Ana Sparks.

Probably Peg...

an, but that is it.

Oh, is that it?

Great news!

Not a gooon.

But it's really important.

Ugh.

I figure for Einstein

and not for me.

I need to become a Jewish person.

- Shelinner! - Coming.

Sorry I'm late. Shalom.

What's on your head?

- A yarmulke. - A yama-what?

It's a special Jewish hat.

It remin is always over you.

Mom.

Oh, come on, it's funny.

It's not funny and it's not a yarmulke.

It is a coaster I crocheted at Bible camp.

Are you gonna say something to him?

Normally I would, but I got bigger problems right now.

- Let's just say grace. - Hold on.

Are these hot dogs kosher?

Over the next few days,

I continued to play the violin

in an effort to replicate the mental prowess of Einstein.

I was asked to confine my practice to the garage

by my father, mother, sister and brother.

Meemaw was fine with me practicing in the house,

but why wouloesn't live with us.

Hey, George.

Hey, Herschel.

Let me guess, you're here to complain

about Sheldon's violin playing.

Un say yeah,

but since he started,

my chickens been dropping eggs like crazy.

- That's weird. - Hey, uh,

I hear congratulations are in order.

What's that you hear?

Maybe I n't hear it. Never mind.

It's all right.

Seems like everybody knows.

You don't seem terribly enthusiastic.

It's the money, Herschel.

It's all about the money.

Well, there's only one solution to that.

Which is?

You got to make more money.

- Thank you. - Welcome.

Hey, I got to ask,

that file playing increase the fertility in all the females

around here or just my chickens?

I was just throwing it out there, never mind.

Wait here, I'm-a go get you some eggs.

- That's okay. - You're getting eggs.

Guess I'm getting eggs.

All right, George,

- what's so damn important? - Well...

I wherefore's,

but I'm gonna need a raise.

Is this 'cause Mary's pregnant?

You got to be kiing me.

Does everyboamn town know my business?

I just... it was taking a guess.

- Tom. - My wife told me.

Doesn't matter. What do you say?

Are you threatening to quit if you don't get it?

No, Tom, I'm threatening to rob a bank.

Okay. All right, well, let's not do that.

$100 a week do the trick?

Yes. Thanks. Bye.

Temple Judea,

how can I help you?

Hello, I'd like to become Jewish.

Who would be in charge of that?

How old are you?

- I'm ten. - Please hold.

Hello, this is Rabbi Schneiderman.

To whom am I speaking?

Hello, this is Sheldon Cooper.

Hello, Sheldon. Um, how can I help you?

I'm currently a Baptist

an like to convert to Judaism.

A Baptist nameon.

Okay.

Ano you want to convert?

Very simple.

It's my intention to become a great scientist

ann't help but notice

most of the great scientists are Jewish,

so logic dictates it's time to switch teams.

Well, I'm sure there are

many Baptist scientists you could emulate.

That's kind of you to say,

but other than Cornelius Drebbel in the 1500s,

it's pretty slim pickings.

Well, Shel like a very smart young man.

Oh, you have no idea.

Can I ask how your parents feel about this?

Well, when I presented them with my plan,

the woreay" were used.

I'm not surprised.

But they were similarly resistant

when I wanted to get an ant farm

an.

All right, here's what I'm gonna tell you to do.

Read your Bible.

Alreaid, cover to cover.

- Really? - Quiz me.

No, that's okay, I believe you.

All right, my advice to you

is to stay with the faith of your parents.

- What else you got? - Okay.

Then I'm gonna tell you

to be your own man.

But I want to be a great scientist like Albert Einstein.

Sheldon,

when your days are over,

God will never ask you,

"Why weren't you Einstein?"

But he might ask you,

"Why weren't you Sheldon?"

What's going on? You all right?

I'm not feeling great.

Is it a pregnant thing?

'Cause I got some good news on that.

I got a decent raise.

It doesn't matter.

What oesn't matter?

We can pull this off now.

I lost the baby.

Oh.

You're probably relieved, huh?

Actually...

... no.

I love the first three.

Fourth one's a charm, right?

Dad?

Mom?

Yeah, Shelly?

I just thought you should know

I'm not going to be Jewish.

I'm going to remain the atheist Baptist you've come to love.

Good to hear.

Are you crying?

Yeah, but don't worry, everything's okay.

Good.

Once again,

I brought my mother so much joy

she was moved to tears.

I o it.

Tom, George Cooper's here for you.

Send him in.

Hey, Tom, you got a minute?

Pretty busy.

Make it quick.

It turns out I that raise.

What happened, you win the lottery?

No, no.

Aw, George, I am so sorry.

Well, what can you do?

Listen, I clearey,

why don't you just keep the money.

- Oh, no, I coulo that. - No.

No, I mean it. It's yours.

Okay.

Thanks. Bye.

Thank you, but I will no longer be needing these.

You're giving up so soon? What happened?

- Did it hurt your fingers? - No.

I'm following the aerman

from Temple Judea in Houston.

Is this another one of your jokes?

No. If it were a joke, your mouth would be open

an "ha-ha" would be coming out.

- Synce by MementMori - -- www.aic7ed.com --