All language subtitles for English.Teacher.S01E02.1080p.HEVC.x265-MeGusta[EZTVx.to].srt - eng(2)

♪ ♪

Oh. [grunts]

[teen boy]
Mr. Marquez.

- Mr. Marquez!
- [talking over each other]

- Whoa. Hold up. Whoa, whoa.
- What?

What? What? What?
What's going on?

- We need your help right now.
- With Powderpuff.

Powderpuff?
What's Powderpuff?

You know, when the girls
play football,

and the football players
dress as cheerleaders.

- Oh, that.
- Yeah.

I'm sorry, I don't know anything
about football. I gotta--

- No, no, no, no, no.
- Mr. Marquez.

Nobody's mad about

the girls playing football.

They're mad about us
dressing up as cheerleaders.

And why are you guys
coming to me? 'Cause I'm gay?

- Uh-huh.
- This is very sweet
of you guys,

but I don't want to be
on the news as, like,

the gay guy fighting
for young men's rights

to dress up like girls.

Come on, Mr. Marquez,
this is our senior year.

It's the most things
we look forward to.

It's the most things
you look forward to?

Jason, the grammar.

It's the thing
you look forward to the most.

Wow, yeah.
That is way better.

See, you're already helping.

Okay, I'm sorry, guys,
I just-- It's not--

Come on. Please think about it.

I'll talk to Coach Hillridge
after school. How's that?

Yeah, let's go!

[all cheering]

[all barking]

Break!

♪♪ I wanna take you
in my arms ♪

♪♪ You're taking me ♪

♪♪ To the point of no return ♪

♪♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪

♪♪ You're taking me... ♪

- [whistle blows]
- [Markie] All right, huddle up.

Listen. You ladies all begged

for a female coach this year

for Powderpuff,
and since everybody gets

what they want these days,

give it up for Ms. Sanders.

- [applause]
- Hi! Thank you. Unfortunately,

I don't know
all the technical

dos and don'ts
of football per se,

so I brought
Coach Hillridge here.

He's just gonna assist me
on small things,

like when you catch the ball,
which way do you go?

And then why do you ever
kick the ball?

That's right, Ms. Sanders is
your coach today,

so just ignore me.

You won't notice me at all.
I'll just be here

teaching her how to teach you
how to play football.

- That's right.
- Tell 'em to start
running sprints.

- Sprints!
- Come on.

Evan, catch.

Hey, I told your
football players

I'd help them save
their Powderpuff performance.

You're trying to cancel that?

You think I want
to cancel Powderpuff?

Why? I love that shit.

Come on, big football dudes
dressed up like cheerleaders?

Ow!

That's the height
of comedy, man.

- Come on.
- God!

- Gwen!
- You gotta take it up
with Moretti.

- I'm taking it up with Moretti.
- Catch him.

What do I do now?

Burpees.

- It's time for blurpees, girls.
- Burpees.

- Hey, Grant.
- No, Evan.

- Grant...
- No!

I'm off the clock.

My car is technically

- not school grounds.
- Listen,

what is this Powderpuff thing?

You're canceling this
Powderpuff thing? What is this?

We're not canceling anything.
Nothing is being canceled.

Look, it's not...
It's being discussed.

It's not all of Powderpuff.

It's just the... the boys'
cheerleading performance

has become sort of
a hot-button issue, all right?

- Just tell the parents
to lighten up.
- It's not the parents.

- What?
- It's not the parents.

The parents love it.
Big football guys

in girls' clothes;
it's funny stuff, Evan.

Even I, back in the day,

- I was in Powderpuff
back in the day.
- Really?

Yeah, we had a cheer
about our butts, kicking butts.

That's me. I didn't even
have to shave my legs.

You look like Hilary Duff.

- Thank you.
- Wait, so if it's not
the parents,

- then who's trying to cancel it?
- The students.

The LGBTQ+IA2S+ Alliance.

That's crazy. Why didn't they
just come talk to me?

I helped rhinestone their flag.

They think
you're homophobic now.

- What? Why?
- They think that

you don't believe in lesbians.

Oh, come on.

That was taken
out of context.

What context was it in?

Just, I was having a regular
conversation with Gwen,

and I was telling her
I have a hard time believing

that lesbians aren't
attracted to men.

[Evan]
Okay, so you're saying...

Powderpuff is
this old boomer tradition

where the boys get
to make fun of the girls.

And more importantly,
these football players

are "gender switching"
as a joke

when there are people
in this school who are actually

non-binary or trans.

- And that is not a joke.
- Pablo!

Wake up. But is anybody

actually upset about it?

Like, in my experience,
if men want to

dress up as women,
you should just let them.

Yeah, let my boys have fun.

[Becca]
I actually love Powderpuff

because the boys have to admit
how hard our cheers are.

Becca, you literally
quit cheerleading.

Yeah, because I literally died
for three minutes last year.

I went to hell.

Stop talking about that.

I've never liked Powderpuff, personally.

Why, Jeff?

- It sickens me.
The beauty's too intense.
- That's crazy.

So who here is in the
LGBTQIA2S+ Alliance? Okay, look,

if you guys had come to me,

I would have gently
reminded you that,

while your hearts may be
in the right place,

in actuality, you're banning
a drag performance

at a school in the South.

- Ooh...
- Stop being a contrarian.

You know what's bullshit?

That these cool jock kids
get to dress however they want,

and everybody loves it.

But they're doing it
as a joke.

It's not like real,
authentic drag.

So you guys just want
the boys to be authentic

and respectful
in their performance?

That would make you happy?

- Yeah.
- Yeah, sure.

Okay. Good to know.

- Yes, Tiffany?
- This is literally Book Club.

Like, why are we talking
about this?

♪♪ We all about it, uh-huh. ♪

[sighs] [inhaling]

[Evan]
So when you talk to the boys,
just, like,

keep it base level,
keep it easy.

You know,
they're new to all this.

All right, I got it, yeah.

They're gonna be in shock.

Hey, you still do those, uh,

- poetry jams?
- [laughs] No.

That was just at A&M.
I stopped after college.

Oh, I miss those
college parties.

I remember you, like,
refused to take photos

with a digital camera.

You'd be like,
"I only use real film."

- Right, right.
- And you had that mullet.

I'm much less of a loser now.

What do you do here?

- I teach English.
- Oh.

Hey, guys!

Um, I would like
to introduce you today

to a very special
friend of mine.

This is Shazam.

Hello. Hello,
my little babies, hello.

- [all] Hi, Shazam.
- Hi.

So Shazam was the queen of drag
back in college,

and now she has a long-running
show in Austin

- called Woman of La Mancha.
- That actually got canceled.

The show is now called
Drink Ticket Tuesday.

So when you guys are
old enough to drink,

maybe you can go
check that out.

Or-- Don't tell anybody
I said that.

So, are you, like, a dude?

I'm like a dude, yeah.

- [laughs]
- I'm cool, like you guys.

I'm a cool dude,

I sit home, I wear tube socks.

I blow my nose. I have hair.

But when she's dressed
like this, she is Shazam.

When I'm dressed like this,
I'm your mama.

- Okay.
- [Shazam] Quick question.

- Does anybody own a ferret?
- Do they have ferrets?

I'm just trying to connect
with the kids.

They're not eight.

I don't know how old they are.

So here's the deal, guys.

Shazam is gonna teach you guys

the proper way
to dress like a girl.

The right way, you know.
It's a little bit like

if you guys are gonna drink
or experiment with drugs,

I'd rather you do it
in the house.

That's not a great example,
but she and I,

we're gonna be your coaches
in this.

Uh, them, like,
real titties or, like,

- what you got going on?
- [guys laugh]

Honey, no.
This is a breast plate.

It looks great, right?
Very realistic.

- Yeah, it looks awesome.
- We call it a titty bib.

And this is a lace front wig.

- My mom has that.
- Okay.

So is there, like, a titty bib
for your dick, too?

Or, like, where's that at?

Yes, I am tucked.

So it's like a jock strap,
or like a cup.

It just kind of...
[makes popping noise]

- [student] Does it pop in?
- Yeah. I tie it on the end

of a ping-pong ball
and shove it up my ass.

- [laughter]
- Don't laugh. That's rude.

[Evan] Yeah-- No, no.
You guys can laugh.

This is what I'm saying.

Shazam is very funny.
Drag can be very funny.

So if you guys,
for this Powderpuff performance,

instead of doing joke drag
or half-drag,

or just
the cheerleading outfits,

if you just do authentic,
real drag like this,

then the LGBTQ Alliance
cannot be upset.

So you want us dressed
like this?

Oh, honey, I don't think
you have the balls

to dress like this.

- [laughter]
- [all] Ooh.

And that-- this is good.
This is the thing.

She just read you,
and you can read her back.

And I'm an accelerated
reader, Tray.

Damn.

Drag is about self-expression.

It's about being
larger than life.

Shazam used to have
a motto in college.

You used to say,
"We don't mark it, baby..."

-"We do everything full-out."
- We go full-out.

What is "mark it"?

- like...
- When you don't go
all the way on something.

Yeah. It's like one, two,
three, four, blah, blah.

You know, you want to be
like... [makes whooshing noise]

Like when you don't hustle
in football.

Oh, okay.

So we're gonna go all-out.
You guys on board? Maybe?

Mm...

[sighs]

Fuck it, it's my senior year.

Let's get it for Coach Shazam.

- [all cheering]
- Let's go.

- [cheering, chanting]
- Yeah, Coach Shazam!

- [students barking]
- [Shazam] Okay. Uh... oh.

Sarah, you hold the ball.
You're gonna hike it to, to who?

- To the quarterback.
- To the quarterback, yes.
Amazing.

Great. Once you catch it,

you're just gonna throw it to...

- who?
- To the receiver.

Ella, catch it.
Yes! I love this!

Okay, so once you catch it--

Oh, oh, oh.
Eh, eh, I know this.

You guys are all gonna
tackle her.

- Okay? You're gonna get her!
- Wait, wait.

Put your body into her,
chest forward.

Wait, aren't we playing
flag football?

- Yeah.
- Uh, no. What?

- Yes. Flag football.
- What? No.

Why wouldn't they play
tackle football?

So they don't injure themselves
or each other.

Are you kidding?

- No.
- I mean, God, here we go.

Girls aren't allowed
to hurt anyone.

This is why we get kidnapped.

Someone says, "Get in my car."

We go along with it

'cause we don't want
to hurt their feelings,

and it turns out to be
the killer.

This is a football field,
it's a game.

We're not worried about killers.

- You're not.
- Excuse me?

Coach Hillridge,
you can walk to your car

alone at night without thinking
someone's gonna kill you.

You can walk alone
to your car tonight as well.

- Just don't park in
a shit neighborhood.
- Okay, okay.

You're-you're kidding, right?

- I'm not.
- I'm a 110-pound girl.

- The whole world is
a bad neighborhood to me.
- That part.

You know what,
I don't think you know

what it's like to be
a woman, obviously.

- That's not the point.
- Your biggest fear is

getting made fun of.

Our biggest fear is
getting raped and killed.

Whoa, whoa, whoa! The girls do
not need to hear about this.

They hear about this
all the time.

When I toured Texas State,

this is, like,
all they talked about.

Did they show you where
all those emergency poles are

- in case you're getting
serial killed at collage?
- Yeah.

Yeah, they had to.

- Exactly.
- Okay, well, first and foremost,

we're not talking about getting

serial killed at college.

This is Powderpuff.
This is fun, okay?

How do you expect them
to defend themselves

on the field...

- Mm.
- ...if they can't defend
themselves

out in the world?

How are they gonna
defend themselves

against someone like
the Highway Killer?

- Oh, my God.
- Oh, yeah.

Who's the Highway Killer?

The podcast, The Highway Killer:

Murder at the Speed of Death?

Yeah. It's really good.

- Yeah.
- The chemistry between
the two of them,

- The way they're
making each other laugh?
- I know.

- What's it called?
Wait, what's it...
- The Highway Killer.

- [Gwen] Get it out.
- Okay, wait, yeah.

I'll give it a go. Why not?

302 episodes.

By the way, routes.

Oh, yeah, run routes, guys.

- Get it!
- [blows whistle] Come on.

I asked you not
to get involved.

Grant, if you're teaching
somebody to play piano,

who do you get to help them?

A piano teacher.
So if you're teaching guys

to dress up like girls...

Evan, I'm already getting calls
from the parents about this.

I don't know who this person is.

She could be a lunatic,
she could be a criminal.

Because she happens to be
a drag queen,

she's a lunatic and a criminal?

Are you hearing yourself?

That's not what I mean.

You can't bring in strangers
to teach at the school.

- You can't do that.
- I was trying to satisfy

the LGBTQIA2S+ Alliance.

Why? Why succumb to the whims
of these four gay kids?

I never said that.

There's at least eight
of them, right?

Evan, you just have
to listen to them complain.

You don't actually have to do

anything about their problems.

I thought their concerns
were valid.

Valid? Here's what's valid.

Those football players' parents
are gonna be there,

Superintendent Boone
will be there,

and this, this is what
they're expecting to see.

I'll read along, all right?

"Appropriate and approved attire

"for the Powderpuff
halftime performance:

"hair ties, face glitter,

- Polish...
- ...nail polish,
cheerleading outfits."

This is ridiculous.

It needs to be cute,
it needs to be fun.

Everybody's gonna be happy.

We're gonna have a great time.

No one gets fired.
Think of your job, Evan.

Think of your job.

So, ladies,
you've got these flags.

If someone's trying
to get your flag,

I'm thinking
it's a lot of this.

Like, it's in the hips.
So try it.

Like, if someone's trying
to get you,

- and you're juking--
- [Markie] Okay, okay, stop.

Stop what you're doing, stop.

I listened to, like,
eight episodes

of that podcast
you told me about,

and I could care less about

y'all running plays.

Running out routes,
in routes, posts.

I care more about you
not ending up

in tiny little pieces
in someone's freezer.

We need to forget
about football,

and teach these girls
self-defense.

- Wow, Markie.
- Yeah.

Looks like
I'm a feminist now.

You're a feminist?

I mean, only when it comes
to female violence.

I still feel the same way
about equal pay.

Some people just work harder.

I mean, show me a woman
who's a CEO.

Elizabeth Holmes.

Okay, we are doing female
self-defense 101 right now.

I just want to play football.

- Then you can leave.
- Fuck out of here.

[Evan]
Guys, I hate to break it to you.

We got some bad news.

I got this email
from the school board.

This is a list of things
that have been approved

- for the boys' Powderpuff
performance.
- [grumbling]

Needless to say, the things
we've been doing in here

are not on this list.

And they want to kick Shazam
out of the party.

- [grumbling]
- First, my sister's
baby shower, now this.

Do you guys want me
to read this list?

- No.
- No.

Then why don't I just...

- [cheering]
- [laughter]

- Fuck this.
- [Tray] Whose house?

- [all] Our house!
- Whose house?

- Our house!
- [cheering]

[applause]

It's our house.

These-these are gonna fit better

if you really, just, like, stretch.

Love, and then let's...
There we go.

Yeah. It's actually a bra,
but I wear mine

as a sleep mask
when I fly coach.

Okay, Coach Hillridge,
you're walking to your car

alone at night.
Where are your keys?

- Front pocket.
- Wrong.

Attacker, boom, you're dead.

Take your keys,
put them right between

your fingers like Wolverine.

- God, that's gonna get him good.
- [Shazam] What kind of girls

you run with
that you've never seen a bra?

Five, six, seven, eight.

♪♪ Before you start
to blow it... ♪

- Step together, step together,
step together.
- [rhythmic clapping]

♪♪ For a breakdown... ♪

Come on, boys.
Little more sashay,

a little less shantay.

Do you see the way
she just did this?

She was like...
You know what I mean?

That is-- what do we call it--
marking it. She was marking it.

Markie, you're a beautiful
single female,

there's a note on your car.

Probably from an admirer.
Let's see what it's about.

Distraction means death.

You're done.

Ah...

Sway, sway.

- Will you marry me?
- Yes.

- Of course.
- Boom, you're dead.

Your husband's the most likely
person to kill you.

Let me see the hands like this.

We saw a nipple.
Now we've been disqualified.

- Killer's dead.
- [Markie] Check the pulse?

He tricked you, now you're dead.

♪♪ You don't have to answer... ♪

Okay, can I see you try that?

Yes.

Boom, you're dead,
so is your family.

Boom, you're dead.
Boom, you're dead.

[choking sounds]

♪♪ Gloria ♪

- ♪♪ Gloria ♪
- ♪♪ Gloria ♪

♪♪ I think they got
your number... ♪

Evan, I think they're ready.

Markie, seriously, you've done
such a good job today.

- I'm so proud of you.
- My eyes are open.

- I've learned a lot, you know?
- Thank you.

- Hey.
- Give me a little hug.

- Mm-hmm.
- My buddy.

- Indeed.
- Chloroform, boom, he's dead.

Okay, so, then you guys all get
in a line and then I come out

and then I hit the audience
with a huge death drop, right?

So it's like, left leg out,
right leg back.

- Bam.
- [Evan] I don't know,

I think it might be better
to just leave

the drag performing to the kids.

No, Mr. Marquez. We want Shazam
until the very end.

She steps our pussy up.

Okay, if you guys want Shazam
to do a death drop,

Shazam can do a death drop
at the end of the performance.

Brayden,
you want to count us out?

Full out on three.
One, two, three.

[all]
Full out!

Let's go, bitches.

Uh, same time tomorrow, guys.

[Shazam]
Good hustle. You know, I think

- we're doing
a really good thing here.
- Me, too.

Is this your iPhone charger?

No, I don't think so.

Well, I am gonna go
to the bathroom

because I need to untuck.

- Mama is in pain.
- Okay.

Take all the time you need.
If you see a bald guy

who looks like
he's gonna kill himself,

that's the principal.
Just walk the other way.

[Evan]
Keith.

You left your duffel bag.

This thing is getting
heavier and heavier.

What do you keep in there?

It's fucking wigs, man.

[chuckles]
What is this?

- Wigs.
- What's in your trunk?

You're stealing from the school?

No, this is stuff
I've owned before.

Stuff you've owned before?

What does that even mean?

Oh, my God. What is in this?

Ferret food
from Ms. Mallory's class?

I have children to feed, Evan, okay?

You feed your children
ferret food?

My ferrets are my kids, Evan.

I don't have a school
full of them, all right?

We have to get
this fucking stuff back inside.

- Which stuff?
- All of it.

- All right, I-I'll help.
- No, you can't help.

You're a fucking thief.

Do you understand I vouched
for you with the principal?

I should call the fucking cops
right now.

Oh, the principal? God, you used
to be so punk rock, man.

I don't know, you changed.

You are so fucked-up.

Anyway,
I'll see you at rehearsal.

No, you won't,
because you're-you're fired.

People are obsessed
with saying that to me.

- [car door opens and closes]
- We need those printers.
- Peace out, Evan.

- [engine starts]
- People have to print things
at this school.

Thank God you can't fit
a fucking copy machine

in that trunk.

[Grant]
Ten printers, laser and inkjet.

Five laptops.

Framed picture of me. Mm.

Uh, an American flag. An abacus.

45 pounds of ferret food.

iPhone chargers,
20 to 30 of 'em.

No one can find
their iPhone chargers.

Oh, and a student
lent Shazam $300.

Well, they're not
getting it back.

Uh, look, th-there was
no way of knowing, really,

- that she was--
- No, there's no way of knowing?

Your friend Keith
has a record, Evan.

We're talking
grand larceny here.

- Right.
- A criminal drag queen
was brought into this school.

You basically conjured

a conservative talking point
out of thin air.

Did you not even think
to check his, h-her background?

- No, th-this was
an old friend. I--
- No, uh, no,

because you were so consumed
with your little mission, right?

Okay, well,
congratulations, Evan.

Congratulations,
you-you succeeded.

- [sighs] Oh, God.
- I am canceling

the Powderpuff
boys' performance.

- Why?
- A three-minute skit

just isn't worth the hassle,
all right?

It's-it's already too much.

I'm getting texts
from the LGBTQ kids.

I-I don't even know how they got
my personal phone number.

And with Superintendent Boone
being there, no, no, no, no, no.

Do you understand
how big this issue is?

This isn't just about a little
skit at a football game.

This is about drag.

Yeah, you...
you made it about drag.

- [water fizzing]
- [Grant exhales]

- Purr.
- [Gwen] Wait.

- So she had a record?
- [Evan] Yeah, I mean,

you can just never predict
that someone has three DUIs

and is permanently banned
from the Austin Zoo.

- We got to go there.
- We do.

We have to go there,
don't forget that.

The point is, I didn't know.

It's awful that it's over,
you know?

It's just, like,
it's over, it's over.

I guess the girls' football game
will be fun.

Yeah, I don't know
how much football they learned,

but they're not gonna get killed
at a highway rest stop.

I can guarantee it.

I think I'm not gonna go
to the game anyway.

You got to come
to the football game.

I don't know, it's so sad now.

It would mean a lot to me
that you come and you're just

in the stand...
I worked really hard.

- Yeah.
- You can bring a book
and just, like, chill.

- Yeah, I'll go.
- Thank you.

[Nick]
Goddamn it!

Is that Nick out there?

Oh, yeah.
He's working on the pool.

What is he doing again?

He's building a pool by hand?

We're, like, basically saving
so much money.

Because he doesn't need
bulldozers.

He doesn't need people.
He just needs himself.

And shovels and all that stuff.

That sounds so crazy.

No, it's just concrete
and digging, I think.

And then, once it's done, it's
gonna get listed on Swimply.

What's the word
that you're saying?

Swimply's an app where you,
like, list your pool

in your backyard
and you rent it for hours

to people-- strangers--
and they pay you.

- While your home?
- While we're home.

And then you charge more if they
come in and use your bathroom.

Well, good for you.

I'll get him
to explain it to you. Nick!

- No, you don't need to get him.
- No, no. Nick!

- You don't have to come.
- You d--

Oh, hey, Nick.

Hey.

- [Gwen] Hi.
- Hey, babe, what's up?

I was just, um,
bragging about the,

- the pool.
- Yeah, yeah, I mean, look.

It's like nobody in this
neighborhood is on Swimply.

They have pools, but they're
not on the app, but, like,

I was at Trader Joe's
the other day and I think

my neighbor heard me
talking to you about it,

so this is, like, a rush dig,
it's gonna be a rush dig.

All right, well, I s...
I support that.

I think it's cool.
I think it's inspiring.

It's so much fun. All right,
I got to get back outside.

Okay, bye.

- Mwah. Love you.
- My little pool man.

Nice to see you.

[Nick]
Good to see you, Evan.

You guys are so cute.

It's so good
that he has this, though.

'Cause he needs to be
distracted.

'Cause the looking for a job
thing was a lot.

[crowd cheering, clamoring]

Get the fuck back!

- [whistle blows]
- [Gwen screams]
- [Markie] Yeah!

- Yeah! Yes!
- Do we get points for that?

- We do, we do. Go for one!
- Oh!

- Yeah, yeah!
- Oh!

- Oh!
- Yeah.

[Harry]
Evan.

- Oh, hey.
- Hey.

- How's it going?
- Good to see you.

Hey, do you know anybody
who has, like,

20 printers I could use?

[laughs]

That's funny.

[Rick]
Hey, hey, hey.

Oh, Superintendent Boone,
this is

our college counselor Rick.

It's a pleasure
to meet you, Rick.

As long as you don't ask me
for a raise, that is.

[laughter]

Actually, um,
if I could grab five to chat

about that with you,
that would be sick.

Maybe we hit up Ruth's Chris, fellas?

[blowing whistle]

All right, whatever,
I'm gonna head home.

- Nice to see you.
- Yeah?

- You're out?
- Yeah.

- Okay.
- [horns honking]

Whoa, what's happening here?

[cheering]

Evan, what the hell is going on?

They did this themselves!
I... was not involved with this.

Hey, yo,
let me ask you something.

Do we offend you?

Someone taught us something.

That even if things
don't go your way or work out,

we don't mark it.

We go full-out, baby.

Thank you, Coach Marquez.

And even if you don't understand
what I'm talking about,

then you about to learn.

You bitches ready?

[all]
Ready.

One, two, three, four.

["The Warrior" by Scandal
playing]

♪♪ Oh... ♪

[laughing]

♪♪ Oh... ♪

♪♪ You run, run ♪

♪♪ Run away ♪

♪♪ It's your heart ♪

♪♪ That you betray ♪

- ♪♪ Well, isn't love primitive ♪
- Yes.

♪♪ A wild gift... ♪

Markie!
Markie, control your players!

Who do you think gave them
the keys to the carts?

- Let the girls dance.
- Whoo!

Hell yeah, Markie.

Hey, man,
Powderpuff is tradition.

♪♪ Your heart's still wild ♪

♪♪ Shootin' at the walls
of heartache ♪

♪♪ Bang, bang... ♪

Whoo!

Yo, yo, yo.

- It's time for the death drop.
- You're in.

♪♪ I am the warrior ♪

♪♪ And heart to heart
you'll win ♪

Aah, yeah!

♪♪ Heart to heart you'll win ♪

[joints crack]

[all gasping, murmuring]

[grunting]

♪♪ If you survive ♪

[crowd cheering]

- [chanting]
- ♪♪ The warrior... ♪

I'm so sorry,
I did not expect this to happen.

Are you kidding?

It was funny as hell.
[laughs]

Back in my day,
when we did Powderpuff,

they told us to go whole hog.

That was whole hog

and an extra half hog
for good measure.

[cheering, clamoring]

♪ ♪

♪♪ Shootin' at the walls
of heartache... ♪

They actually fucking did it.

Work.

♪♪ The warrior ♪

♪♪ And heart to heart
you'll win ♪

♪♪ Heart to heart you'll win ♪

♪♪ If you survive ♪

♪♪ The warrior, the warrior ♪

♪♪ Shootin' at the walls
of heartache ♪

♪♪ Bang, bang ♪

♪♪ I am the warrior ♪

♪♪ Shootin' at the walls
of heartache ♪

♪♪ Bang, bang ♪

♪♪ I am the warrior ♪

♪♪ Shootin' at the walls
of heartache ♪

♪♪ Bang, bang ♪

♪♪ I am the warrior ♪

♪♪ Yes, I am the warrior ♪

♪♪ Victory is mine ♪

- ♪♪ Shootin' at the walls
of heartache ♪
- ♪♪ The warrior ♪

♪♪ I am the warrior ♪

♪♪ Shootin' at the walls
of heartache. ♪