Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,701 --> 00:00:05,434
* she'll be comin' 'round
the Mountain when she comes *
2
00:00:05,467 --> 00:00:07,267
* she'll be comin' 'round
the Mountain when she comes *
3
00:00:07,300 --> 00:00:09,501
* yee-ha,
she'll be ridin' Stuart bondek *
4
00:00:09,534 --> 00:00:11,167
* she'll be ridin'
Stuart bondek *
5
00:00:11,200 --> 00:00:12,734
* she'll be ridin'
Stuart bondek when she... *
6
00:00:12,767 --> 00:00:14,400
Carter!
We're out of towels!
7
00:00:14,434 --> 00:00:16,934
It was your turn to wash 'em.
8
00:00:16,968 --> 00:00:18,501
Throw me a dirty one!
9
00:00:18,534 --> 00:00:21,734
I can't. Caitlin's coming
to pick me up for the theater,
10
00:00:21,767 --> 00:00:22,968
and I'm not ready.
11
00:00:26,367 --> 00:00:27,834
Aaah!
12
00:00:29,300 --> 00:00:30,834
I just had rags de-flead!
13
00:00:30,868 --> 00:00:33,334
You can't go out
with Caitlin tonight.
14
00:00:33,367 --> 00:00:34,634
It's our movie night.
15
00:00:34,667 --> 00:00:37,167
I'm not gonna have
a Swayze-fest by myself.
16
00:00:37,200 --> 00:00:38,801
Carter, we're gonna be...
17
00:00:40,033 --> 00:00:41,834
that's weird.
18
00:00:41,868 --> 00:00:45,234
Yeah. I look different
without my glasses.
19
00:00:45,267 --> 00:00:49,000
Caitlin, let's get outta here.
20
00:00:49,033 --> 00:00:51,767
You should really get that
checked out.
21
00:01:18,934 --> 00:01:20,133
Hey.
Caitlin, hi.
22
00:01:20,167 --> 00:01:21,601
I liked your press release
23
00:01:21,634 --> 00:01:24,133
for the mayor's
"get out and vote" campaign,
24
00:01:24,167 --> 00:01:26,434
although I found the title
a bit racy.
25
00:01:26,467 --> 00:01:27,667
What's racy about it?
26
00:01:27,701 --> 00:01:30,434
"Mayor Winston looks forward
to a huge election."
27
00:01:30,467 --> 00:01:34,200
You might want to proofread
more closely next time.
28
00:01:34,234 --> 00:01:38,234
"Mayor Winston looks forward
to a huge"... oh, my God.
29
00:01:40,033 --> 00:01:42,067
There's no "r"
in "election."
30
00:01:42,100 --> 00:01:43,167
This is a typo.
31
00:01:43,200 --> 00:01:44,701
I assume that.
32
00:01:44,734 --> 00:01:47,000
Otherwise I'd like to know
how you check.
33
00:01:47,033 --> 00:01:49,767
We're about to walk
into a press conference.
34
00:01:49,801 --> 00:01:51,601
Tell them you made a mistake.
35
00:01:51,634 --> 00:01:53,167
Who cares
what the press thinks?
36
00:01:53,200 --> 00:01:55,968
It's taken me years
to build my reputation.
37
00:01:56,000 --> 00:02:01,100
It took me one weekend
in Amsterdam to build mine.
38
00:02:01,133 --> 00:02:03,067
Caitlin! Caitlin!
Caitlin! Caitlin!
39
00:02:03,100 --> 00:02:04,901
Can you tell us
who's responsible
40
00:02:04,934 --> 00:02:06,434
for the mayor's press release?
41
00:02:06,467 --> 00:02:09,767
It's hard to pinpoint
the exact source.
42
00:02:09,801 --> 00:02:11,868
But I will form
a fact-finding committee
43
00:02:11,901 --> 00:02:13,200
to get to the bottom of...
44
00:02:13,234 --> 00:02:14,501
it was me.
45
00:02:14,534 --> 00:02:17,434
I drafted the press release.
46
00:02:18,734 --> 00:02:21,501
Though it was a mistake,
I am in no way implying
47
00:02:21,534 --> 00:02:24,634
that the mayor is incapable
of achieving a huge erection.
48
00:02:26,534 --> 00:02:28,067
Thank you.
49
00:02:30,133 --> 00:02:32,634
Hey, Carter.
You ready for lunch?
50
00:02:32,667 --> 00:02:34,434
Oh, oh, I have to cancel.
51
00:02:34,467 --> 00:02:36,434
But it's Tex-mex Monday.
52
00:02:36,467 --> 00:02:39,200
Sorry. Caitlin and I are taking
rags to the hair salon.
53
00:02:39,234 --> 00:02:40,767
He, uh...
54
00:02:40,801 --> 00:02:44,267
He had a bad reaction
to the grecian formula.
55
00:02:44,300 --> 00:02:46,901
All right...
first movie night, now lunch.
56
00:02:46,934 --> 00:02:50,534
Next you'll be backing out of
the police auction this weekend.
57
00:02:50,567 --> 00:02:52,000
I never said I'd go to that.
58
00:02:52,033 --> 00:02:56,300
Fine... more seized goods
and vehicles for me!
59
00:02:56,334 --> 00:02:59,667
Hey, Stuart.
How was your weekend?
60
00:02:59,701 --> 00:03:02,467
Look, I didn't have a towel,
so I used a dog.
61
00:03:02,501 --> 00:03:03,901
Can we please drop it?!
62
00:03:06,634 --> 00:03:08,334
How about you, Angie?
Good weekend?
63
00:03:08,367 --> 00:03:10,934
I worked at my dad's restaurant
so I can make the rent.
64
00:03:10,968 --> 00:03:12,868
Oh, you crazy kids.
65
00:03:12,901 --> 00:03:14,834
We'll pick this up later.
66
00:03:14,868 --> 00:03:17,567
Hey, Paul.
67
00:03:17,601 --> 00:03:20,334
Lately it feels like
something's missing around here.
68
00:03:20,367 --> 00:03:22,167
You know
what this office needs?
69
00:03:22,200 --> 00:03:24,801
A meat cone?
70
00:03:24,834 --> 00:03:26,901
A little chitchat...
casual conversation.
71
00:03:26,934 --> 00:03:28,901
You mean water-cooler talk?
72
00:03:28,934 --> 00:03:31,767
Exactly. This office needs
more water-cooler talk.
73
00:03:31,801 --> 00:03:35,133
And what better way to do that
than to bring in a meat cone?
74
00:03:35,167 --> 00:03:38,400
Charlie, I was just telling
the mayor...
75
00:03:38,434 --> 00:03:40,033
no meat cone, Paul.
76
00:03:42,033 --> 00:03:44,167
Translatethe following sentence...
77
00:03:44,200 --> 00:03:45,701
I like chicken.
78
00:03:45,734 --> 00:03:51,100
If you said, "me gusta pollo,"
good job.
79
00:03:53,234 --> 00:03:55,501
Translatethe following sentence...
80
00:03:55,534 --> 00:03:57,234
I like chicken.
81
00:03:57,267 --> 00:04:00,367
Me gusta pollo.
82
00:04:00,400 --> 00:04:03,767
If you said, "me gusta pollo,"
good job.
83
00:04:03,801 --> 00:04:05,934
Yes!
84
00:04:05,968 --> 00:04:07,634
Charlie, I want to thank you
85
00:04:07,667 --> 00:04:10,634
for covering for me
at the press conference.
86
00:04:10,667 --> 00:04:11,834
No problem.
87
00:04:11,868 --> 00:04:13,567
I'm in the middle of something.
88
00:04:13,601 --> 00:04:15,133
Oh. Okay.
89
00:04:15,167 --> 00:04:16,834
I...Like...Beef.
90
00:04:19,234 --> 00:04:20,400
What?
91
00:04:20,434 --> 00:04:22,467
You heard me.
92
00:04:22,501 --> 00:04:24,467
I...Like...Beef.
93
00:04:26,534 --> 00:04:27,801
"Intro to Spanish"?
94
00:04:27,834 --> 00:04:29,634
Why are you studying Spanish?
95
00:04:29,667 --> 00:04:31,567
Next time I wake up in Mexico,
96
00:04:31,601 --> 00:04:33,767
I want to find out
how I got there.
97
00:04:33,801 --> 00:04:35,067
I know what you're doing.
98
00:04:35,100 --> 00:04:37,300
You're learning Spanish
so you can help the mayor
99
00:04:37,334 --> 00:04:39,000
connect
with the Latin community.
100
00:04:39,033 --> 00:04:40,367
Exactly.
101
00:04:40,400 --> 00:04:43,300
Fantastic! We should leak
this to the press.
102
00:04:43,334 --> 00:04:45,100
I'd appreciate it
if you didn't tell.
103
00:04:45,133 --> 00:04:47,834
Whatever you want.
Your secret is safe with me.
104
00:04:49,968 --> 00:04:52,100
You told her
you were taking Spanish
105
00:04:52,133 --> 00:04:53,667
to get your college degree?
106
00:04:53,701 --> 00:04:56,434
What, are you nuts?
She can't keep a secret.
107
00:04:56,467 --> 00:04:58,934
What's the big deal?
It's just one credit.
108
00:04:58,968 --> 00:05:00,868
If the press finds out
I didn't graduate,
109
00:05:00,901 --> 00:05:02,701
it could be a problem
for the mayor.
110
00:05:02,734 --> 00:05:04,934
But that doesn't mean
you can't tell Caitlin.
111
00:05:04,968 --> 00:05:07,167
I know she can keep a secret.
112
00:05:07,200 --> 00:05:09,501
Then how do I know
you once had a sex dream
113
00:05:09,534 --> 00:05:11,067
about Paul and Vincent price?
114
00:05:11,868 --> 00:05:13,968
Caitlin!
115
00:05:27,200 --> 00:05:29,801
What's it gonna be for rags...
feathered or bangs?
116
00:05:29,834 --> 00:05:31,334
Surprise me.
117
00:05:31,367 --> 00:05:34,367
I'm gonna make you look
10 years younger.
118
00:05:34,400 --> 00:05:36,634
That's 70 for you!
119
00:05:36,667 --> 00:05:38,300
Charlie's taking
Spanish classes.
120
00:05:38,334 --> 00:05:40,133
He wants to help the mayor
121
00:05:40,167 --> 00:05:42,901
get in touch
with the Latin community.
122
00:05:42,934 --> 00:05:45,601
I'd like to get in touch
with Enrique iglesias...
123
00:05:45,634 --> 00:05:47,834
muy caliente.
124
00:05:47,868 --> 00:05:50,968
The weird thing is, he
doesn't want me to tell anyone.
125
00:05:51,033 --> 00:05:52,400
You just told me.
126
00:05:52,434 --> 00:05:54,033
I know.
Don't tell anyone.
127
00:05:54,067 --> 00:05:56,667
You'd think he'd want to get
some good press out of this.
128
00:05:56,701 --> 00:05:58,100
Would.
129
00:05:58,133 --> 00:06:01,000
Maybe Charlie doesn't care
what the press thinks about him.
130
00:06:01,033 --> 00:06:02,300
Oh, he cares.
131
00:06:02,334 --> 00:06:05,467
I bet he's plagued
with sleepless nights...
132
00:06:05,501 --> 00:06:07,267
just like all of us.
133
00:06:07,300 --> 00:06:09,234
Rags is all shampooed,
134
00:06:09,267 --> 00:06:13,801
and the stylist will be with you
in a couple minutes.
135
00:06:13,834 --> 00:06:14,968
Ahhh. Oooh.
136
00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:19,267
Citrusy.
137
00:06:21,734 --> 00:06:23,534
Ow!
138
00:06:23,567 --> 00:06:27,667
The lengths you women go to
for beauty... ha!
139
00:06:42,067 --> 00:06:44,834
In a moment we're gonna be
in the middle
140
00:06:44,868 --> 00:06:47,067
of some real office chitchat.
141
00:06:47,100 --> 00:06:49,534
Huh? You want
water-cooler talk...
142
00:06:49,567 --> 00:06:51,167
You get a water cooler.
143
00:06:53,100 --> 00:06:56,133
Well, let's give this baby
a test-drive.
144
00:06:56,167 --> 00:06:59,033
So, tell me, Paul...
you like sports?
145
00:06:59,067 --> 00:07:04,033
Sports... oh, yeah.
Oh, absolutely. Yeah.
146
00:07:04,067 --> 00:07:06,801
I could talk endlessly
about sports.
147
00:07:06,834 --> 00:07:08,801
I feel the same way.
148
00:07:08,834 --> 00:07:11,834
Sports!
149
00:07:11,868 --> 00:07:14,300
Stuart, rags was swept out
into the street
150
00:07:14,334 --> 00:07:16,467
and accidentally taken
to the pound.
151
00:07:16,501 --> 00:07:19,133
He was found without a leash,
and he committed a g & b.
152
00:07:19,167 --> 00:07:21,968
What's a g & b?
Growl and bite.
153
00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:24,000
Come on.
You're in charge of this.
154
00:07:24,033 --> 00:07:25,834
Make a call.
Get him released.
155
00:07:25,868 --> 00:07:28,234
If I let rags go,
then I'd have to release
156
00:07:28,267 --> 00:07:30,400
the poodle we nabbed
for a d & r...
157
00:07:30,434 --> 00:07:33,701
dump and run.
158
00:07:33,734 --> 00:07:36,634
Sorry. My hands are tied.
159
00:07:36,667 --> 00:07:39,000
This is outrageous!
160
00:07:42,067 --> 00:07:46,501
Ah! Ah!
You thirsty, Charlie?
161
00:07:46,534 --> 00:07:47,667
Sure.
162
00:07:47,701 --> 00:07:49,734
There we go.
163
00:07:54,300 --> 00:07:56,534
What's wrong with this thing?
164
00:08:01,534 --> 00:08:04,801
Can anyone tell me how to say
"what a beautiful day"?
165
00:08:04,834 --> 00:08:06,033
Lewis.
166
00:08:06,067 --> 00:08:07,133
Qu� lindo d�a.
167
00:08:07,167 --> 00:08:08,234
Very good.
168
00:08:08,267 --> 00:08:09,934
How about "what time is lunch?"
169
00:08:09,968 --> 00:08:11,801
Lewis.
170
00:08:11,834 --> 00:08:14,367
�A qu� hora es el almuerzo?
171
00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:16,033
Excellent.
172
00:08:16,067 --> 00:08:17,934
Now, who can say
"I have a flat tire,
173
00:08:17,968 --> 00:08:20,200
and I need a ride
to the nearest gas station"?
174
00:08:20,234 --> 00:08:23,000
Charlie.
175
00:08:25,367 --> 00:08:27,334
Wildcat football rules!
176
00:08:27,367 --> 00:08:29,133
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
177
00:08:29,167 --> 00:08:31,934
Why don't we take
a 10-minute break?
178
00:08:37,033 --> 00:08:38,567
What are you doing here?
179
00:08:38,601 --> 00:08:41,634
Don't get mad, but I brought
a reporter to do a story on you.
180
00:08:41,667 --> 00:08:45,133
George brandle
with the New York journal.
181
00:08:45,167 --> 00:08:48,133
You can thank me later.
182
00:08:48,167 --> 00:08:50,300
After Caitlin called me,
I did some digging.
183
00:08:50,334 --> 00:08:52,667
Is it true you never graduated
from college?
184
00:08:55,434 --> 00:08:56,934
Thank you!
185
00:09:04,200 --> 00:09:06,601
Caitlin, I'm glad you're here.
186
00:09:06,634 --> 00:09:08,033
I had this terrible dream
187
00:09:08,067 --> 00:09:10,300
that my picture
was on the front page,
188
00:09:10,334 --> 00:09:12,701
right below a caption
calling me stupid.
189
00:09:13,934 --> 00:09:18,133
Oh, wait a minute...
that wasn't a dream!
190
00:09:18,167 --> 00:09:19,601
How was I supposed to know?
191
00:09:19,634 --> 00:09:22,434
Why didn't you graduate
from college in the first place?
192
00:09:22,467 --> 00:09:24,367
It's a long story.
193
00:09:24,400 --> 00:09:25,901
Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!
194
00:09:25,934 --> 00:09:28,534
Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!
Chug! Chug!
195
00:09:28,567 --> 00:09:30,033
I can't believe you graduated.
196
00:09:30,067 --> 00:09:32,334
That Spanish final
was so freakin' hard,
197
00:09:32,367 --> 00:09:34,534
I didn't think
we were gonna make it.
198
00:09:36,534 --> 00:09:38,968
What Spanish final?
199
00:09:41,334 --> 00:09:42,701
I'm gonna fix this,
200
00:09:42,734 --> 00:09:45,701
and the press is gonna think
you're a rhodes scholar.
201
00:09:45,734 --> 00:09:47,701
Don't try to fix this.
Don't do anything.
202
00:09:47,734 --> 00:09:49,868
They're calling you stupid.
I don't care.
203
00:09:49,901 --> 00:09:52,801
How can you not care?
Because I'm not stupid.
204
00:09:52,834 --> 00:09:54,701
Before you helped me,
205
00:09:54,734 --> 00:09:56,734
I was gonna cruise
through this class.
206
00:09:56,767 --> 00:09:59,234
The whole city is watching.
I have to get an "a."
207
00:09:59,267 --> 00:10:00,567
What did you plan on getting?
208
00:10:00,601 --> 00:10:01,968
A "c"...
209
00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:06,434
nice and average,
nothin' crazy.
210
00:10:06,467 --> 00:10:08,868
And how far
did that attitude get you?
211
00:10:10,133 --> 00:10:13,534
Hi. Professor Ryan
asked me to tutor you
212
00:10:13,567 --> 00:10:15,501
because you have a "c" average.
213
00:10:18,934 --> 00:10:21,534
Second base.
214
00:10:25,901 --> 00:10:29,000
The water cooler
isn't working, is it?
215
00:10:29,033 --> 00:10:30,667
I'm afraid not, sir.
216
00:10:30,701 --> 00:10:33,868
Maybe we should give
the meat cone a shot.
217
00:10:33,901 --> 00:10:35,667
People aren't having
conversations
218
00:10:35,701 --> 00:10:38,167
because we haven't given them
a conversation piece.
219
00:10:38,200 --> 00:10:39,868
What did you have in mind, sir?
220
00:10:39,901 --> 00:10:41,834
Wrap your brain around this.
221
00:10:49,033 --> 00:10:50,968
Very provocative, sir.
222
00:10:51,033 --> 00:10:53,968
Pretty hard not to have
an opinion about this!
223
00:10:54,000 --> 00:10:56,534
It's as if God exists,
224
00:10:56,567 --> 00:11:00,334
because there's the word "God,"
225
00:11:00,367 --> 00:11:03,901
but then you see
the question mark,
226
00:11:03,934 --> 00:11:06,667
and you wonder...
does he?
227
00:11:06,701 --> 00:11:09,534
How you doin', Carter?
228
00:11:09,567 --> 00:11:11,033
Terrible.
229
00:11:11,067 --> 00:11:12,434
I couldn't sleep
230
00:11:12,467 --> 00:11:15,501
because some jerk wouldn't let
rags out of the pound.
231
00:11:15,534 --> 00:11:17,901
He shouldn't have been
at the salon.
232
00:11:17,934 --> 00:11:20,767
That pampered mutt
doesn't need a hairstylist
233
00:11:20,801 --> 00:11:23,267
any more than he needed
his teeth bleached...
234
00:11:23,300 --> 00:11:25,567
or the doggy liposuction.
235
00:11:25,601 --> 00:11:27,501
I can't help you.
I'm just doing my job.
236
00:11:27,534 --> 00:11:30,634
Enforcing the leash laws?
Ha! That's a joke!
237
00:11:30,667 --> 00:11:33,133
Enforcing the leash laws,
a joke?
238
00:11:33,167 --> 00:11:36,234
Excuse me! I don't mock you
when you're helping the sick
239
00:11:36,267 --> 00:11:37,634
or feeding the homeless!
240
00:11:37,667 --> 00:11:39,601
I think what Carter's
trying to say
241
00:11:39,634 --> 00:11:42,267
is maybe you can make
an exception this once.
242
00:11:42,300 --> 00:11:44,968
Oh, is that what Carter's
tryin' to say?
243
00:11:46,434 --> 00:11:49,467
You know, I think I know Carter
a lot more than you do.
244
00:11:49,501 --> 00:11:52,200
I'm just saying
I haven't seen Carter this upset
245
00:11:52,234 --> 00:11:54,234
since his sister moved
to London.
246
00:11:54,267 --> 00:11:55,400
You have a sister?!
247
00:11:55,434 --> 00:11:57,601
I'm staying out of this.
248
00:12:01,167 --> 00:12:04,701
She's trying to help me
because she is my friend.
249
00:12:04,734 --> 00:12:05,834
Well, so am I.
250
00:12:05,868 --> 00:12:07,734
Yeah, well,
I don't know anymore.
251
00:12:10,701 --> 00:12:14,200
You just bought your dog
another day in lockup!
252
00:12:14,234 --> 00:12:15,868
Hey, Paul...
253
00:12:15,901 --> 00:12:19,767
What's "dog" spelled backwards?
254
00:12:19,801 --> 00:12:24,434
Sir, you just blew my mind.
255
00:12:26,467 --> 00:12:28,801
Charlie, excellent job
on your homework...
256
00:12:28,834 --> 00:12:30,734
check-plus-plus.
257
00:12:30,767 --> 00:12:33,033
How the hell did I get
a check-plus-plus?
258
00:12:33,067 --> 00:12:35,434
I forgot to tell you...
extra-credit essay.
259
00:12:35,467 --> 00:12:38,434
That is so like me.
260
00:12:38,467 --> 00:12:41,868
Charlie, loved your essay
on your summer in Spain.
261
00:12:41,901 --> 00:12:44,701
Which part of Barcelona
did you live in?
262
00:12:44,734 --> 00:12:47,934
Lower east side.
263
00:12:49,033 --> 00:12:50,601
When am I gonna get my beer?
264
00:12:50,634 --> 00:12:52,434
It's being delivered
at 9:00.
265
00:12:52,467 --> 00:12:53,868
You should stop by.
266
00:12:53,901 --> 00:12:56,400
We're having a mixer
with theta delta zeta.
267
00:12:56,434 --> 00:13:00,434
Theta delts, huh?
They're pretty hot.
268
00:13:00,467 --> 00:13:02,534
I'll try to make it.
269
00:13:02,567 --> 00:13:03,901
Hi. I'm Caitlin Moore.
270
00:13:03,934 --> 00:13:06,033
I'm a friend
of Charlie Crawford's.
271
00:13:06,067 --> 00:13:07,434
How can I help you?
272
00:13:07,467 --> 00:13:10,167
Well, we both know Charlie's
not much of an academic,
273
00:13:10,200 --> 00:13:12,534
and since the whole city's
watching him,
274
00:13:12,567 --> 00:13:15,567
I was wondering if you
could give him some extra help.
275
00:13:15,601 --> 00:13:17,534
Extra help?
He's doing extremely well.
276
00:13:17,567 --> 00:13:20,067
In fact, he and Lewis are tied
for top of the class.
277
00:13:20,100 --> 00:13:22,467
Really?
278
00:13:22,501 --> 00:13:24,968
It's amazing, considering
he spends half the time
279
00:13:25,000 --> 00:13:26,968
either sleeping
or reading magazines.
280
00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:30,434
Is there any way you could get
him into the advanced class?
281
00:13:30,467 --> 00:13:32,567
Are you sure he'd want that?
Definitely.
282
00:13:32,601 --> 00:13:35,934
All the bad press has really
been a blow to his self-esteem,
283
00:13:35,968 --> 00:13:39,501
and once the reporters find out
that he's in the advanced class,
284
00:13:39,534 --> 00:13:42,167
he'll go from "el dunce-o"
to "el genius...O."
285
00:13:42,200 --> 00:13:45,100
Charlie is lucky to have
a good friend like you.
286
00:13:45,133 --> 00:13:47,434
Isn't he?
287
00:13:56,067 --> 00:13:57,367
Charlie?
288
00:14:07,067 --> 00:14:10,734
Excuse me.
I'm here to see rags.
289
00:14:10,767 --> 00:14:13,501
He's been scarin'
all the other dogs.
290
00:14:13,534 --> 00:14:15,100
What's he doing?
291
00:14:15,133 --> 00:14:17,300
Just sittin' there.
292
00:14:17,334 --> 00:14:18,868
Did he get my care package?
293
00:14:18,901 --> 00:14:21,000
I sent him smoked salmon
and brie.
294
00:14:21,033 --> 00:14:25,033
Oh, yeah.
He loved it.
295
00:14:25,067 --> 00:14:27,901
I'd like to take him home now.
296
00:14:27,934 --> 00:14:31,267
Sorry. I can't allow that
per Mr. bondek's instructions.
297
00:14:31,300 --> 00:14:33,701
Obviously the instructions
were unclear.
298
00:14:33,734 --> 00:14:37,300
"Don't give rags
to Carter Heywood."
299
00:14:37,334 --> 00:14:40,434
There you go.
I'm not Carter Heywood.
300
00:14:40,467 --> 00:14:42,601
My name is Dexter St. John.
301
00:14:42,634 --> 00:14:45,300
"Carter Heywood
is a 6'2" bald black man
302
00:14:45,334 --> 00:14:48,400
who sometimes uses the alias
'Dexter St. John.'"
303
00:14:49,501 --> 00:14:52,067
if you'll excuse me,
I'm on my break.
304
00:14:54,968 --> 00:14:58,501
How 'bout that giants game?
305
00:15:08,901 --> 00:15:11,501
Come on, rags.
Let's get outta here.
306
00:15:16,767 --> 00:15:19,067
You may catch me,
but you'll never catch rags!
307
00:15:19,100 --> 00:15:22,133
Run, rags!
Run like the wind!
308
00:15:29,767 --> 00:15:31,000
Hi, Charlie.
309
00:15:31,033 --> 00:15:32,801
What are you doing?
310
00:15:32,834 --> 00:15:35,133
Studying. I'm still not sure
what happened.
311
00:15:35,167 --> 00:15:39,701
Somehow I got bumped
into the advanced Spanish class.
312
00:15:39,734 --> 00:15:42,667
You're welcome.
313
00:15:42,701 --> 00:15:44,100
For what?
314
00:15:44,133 --> 00:15:47,200
After I found out how well
you were doing, Mr. humble,
315
00:15:47,234 --> 00:15:50,267
I convinced the teacher
to put you in a higher class.
316
00:15:50,300 --> 00:15:53,000
Now the press is gonna think
you're brilliant!
317
00:15:53,033 --> 00:15:55,501
How happy are you?
318
00:15:55,534 --> 00:15:59,000
Okay, we're gonna have to work
on your "happy" face.
319
00:15:59,033 --> 00:16:01,834
Caitlin, someone else
was doing my homework for me.
320
00:16:01,868 --> 00:16:03,767
I can't speak a word
of Spanish.
321
00:16:03,801 --> 00:16:06,033
You don't belong
in the advanced class.
322
00:16:06,067 --> 00:16:08,667
Not only do I have to pull
an all-nighter,
323
00:16:08,701 --> 00:16:11,901
but I'm missing a kick-ass mixer
with the theta delts.
324
00:16:11,934 --> 00:16:14,601
Sorry. I was just trying
to help improve your image.
325
00:16:14,634 --> 00:16:17,767
Not everyone is obsessed
with what people think of them.
326
00:16:17,801 --> 00:16:19,501
If you're implying
that I'm obsessed
327
00:16:19,534 --> 00:16:21,501
with what people think of me,
you're wrong.
328
00:16:21,534 --> 00:16:23,634
If that's the thanks I get
for trying to help,
329
00:16:23,667 --> 00:16:24,934
I will leave you alone.
330
00:16:24,968 --> 00:16:26,834
Good, because I've got
one night
331
00:16:26,868 --> 00:16:29,834
to translate "unbearable
likeness of being" into Spanish.
332
00:16:35,767 --> 00:16:38,901
I am not obsessed
with what people think of me!
333
00:16:38,934 --> 00:16:40,601
Fine. You're not.
334
00:16:40,634 --> 00:16:42,367
No. I want an example.
335
00:16:42,400 --> 00:16:44,367
Who tried to sue
the New York times
336
00:16:44,400 --> 00:16:46,400
for printing that picture
of you blinking?
337
00:16:46,434 --> 00:16:49,267
I am not getting into that.
Because it's true!
338
00:16:49,300 --> 00:16:52,501
No, because I can't comment
on pending litigation.
339
00:16:59,367 --> 00:17:01,167
You're right.
340
00:17:01,200 --> 00:17:04,501
I am completely consumed
by what people think of me.
341
00:17:04,534 --> 00:17:07,167
I've always been that way.
I am hopeless!
342
00:17:07,200 --> 00:17:08,734
I wish I could be
more like you.
343
00:17:08,767 --> 00:17:11,734
You're so self-confident,
so self-assured...
344
00:17:11,767 --> 00:17:14,334
with so little reason
to be that way.
345
00:17:14,367 --> 00:17:17,701
That's very kind of you.
346
00:17:18,634 --> 00:17:19,601
How's this...
347
00:17:19,634 --> 00:17:21,067
I'm a little embarrassed
348
00:17:21,100 --> 00:17:23,267
about not graduating
from college.
349
00:17:23,300 --> 00:17:25,067
I don't believe you.
No, it's true.
350
00:17:25,100 --> 00:17:26,434
I didn't want people to know
351
00:17:26,467 --> 00:17:28,634
because I was afraid
they'd think less of me.
352
00:17:28,667 --> 00:17:31,334
You're just saying that.
353
00:17:31,367 --> 00:17:32,501
No, I'm not.
354
00:17:32,534 --> 00:17:35,901
Deep down I'm not confident.
I'm insecure.
355
00:17:39,901 --> 00:17:42,167
I knew it.
356
00:17:50,801 --> 00:17:54,434
I am never speaking to you
again.
357
00:17:55,934 --> 00:17:59,367
I was locked up
in that pound for three hours.
358
00:17:59,400 --> 00:18:00,767
You're overreacting.
359
00:18:00,801 --> 00:18:03,067
They threatened
to have me fixed!
360
00:18:04,567 --> 00:18:06,934
Over the years,
I've taken a lot from you.
361
00:18:06,968 --> 00:18:09,033
The time I came home
from my vacation
362
00:18:09,067 --> 00:18:11,267
and found you in my bed
with two women,
363
00:18:11,300 --> 00:18:12,734
I just smiled.
364
00:18:12,767 --> 00:18:15,567
That made four of us.
365
00:18:15,601 --> 00:18:16,868
I applauded your creativity
366
00:18:16,901 --> 00:18:18,801
when you changed
all my business cards
367
00:18:18,834 --> 00:18:21,033
from "Carter Heywood"
to "Carter loves wood."
368
00:18:23,367 --> 00:18:25,501
But you know how much
rags means to me.
369
00:18:25,534 --> 00:18:27,400
This time
you have crossed the line.
370
00:18:27,434 --> 00:18:28,868
None of this
would have happened
371
00:18:28,901 --> 00:18:30,434
if you'd paid
rags more attention
372
00:18:30,467 --> 00:18:31,934
and spent less time on Caitlin.
373
00:18:31,968 --> 00:18:34,133
What does Caitlin have to do
with this?
374
00:18:34,167 --> 00:18:37,033
Since you two
have been hanging out so much,
375
00:18:37,067 --> 00:18:39,367
you barely even see rags
anymore.
376
00:18:39,400 --> 00:18:41,367
You used to play with rags
in the park.
377
00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:43,234
You used to take him
on long walks.
378
00:18:45,067 --> 00:18:48,701
You used to treat him
like he mattered.
379
00:18:48,734 --> 00:18:50,901
Oh, my God.
380
00:18:50,934 --> 00:18:54,567
I finally see
what this is all about.
381
00:18:54,601 --> 00:18:58,400
Stuart...You're rags.
382
00:18:58,434 --> 00:19:00,234
Get outta here.
383
00:19:00,267 --> 00:19:05,434
Don't lock up your feelings
the way you locked up rags.
384
00:19:05,467 --> 00:19:07,767
Admit it... you miss me.
385
00:19:07,801 --> 00:19:10,868
Oh, take it
out of "hyper-gay."
386
00:19:10,901 --> 00:19:12,834
I don miss you.
387
00:19:14,200 --> 00:19:17,834
I just feel a little...
Bored, lonely, and wistful
388
00:19:17,868 --> 00:19:19,567
when you're not around.
389
00:19:19,601 --> 00:19:23,801
I had no idea.
390
00:19:23,834 --> 00:19:27,133
If I've been taking
our friendship for granted,
391
00:19:27,167 --> 00:19:28,234
I'm sorry.
392
00:19:28,267 --> 00:19:30,000
How about I, uh,
393
00:19:30,033 --> 00:19:32,567
make it up to you
with a nice, home-cooked meal?
394
00:19:32,601 --> 00:19:34,300
Huh, huh, huh?
Huh, huh, huh?
395
00:19:34,334 --> 00:19:36,667
If you think that you
can just smooth this over
396
00:19:36,701 --> 00:19:39,133
with a roast chicken...
And some baby carrots...
397
00:19:40,634 --> 00:19:43,300
and some of those garlic
mashed potatoes you make
398
00:19:43,334 --> 00:19:44,601
with the skins still on,
399
00:19:44,634 --> 00:19:46,100
you are sadly mistaken!
400
00:19:46,133 --> 00:19:48,968
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have to go get rags.
401
00:19:51,501 --> 00:19:53,033
And don't even think
about making
402
00:19:53,067 --> 00:19:54,234
your famous cobbler!
403
00:19:54,267 --> 00:19:56,234
With or without whipped cream?
404
00:19:56,267 --> 00:19:57,501
With!!
405
00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:06,267
Congratulations.
You're a graduate.
406
00:20:06,300 --> 00:20:08,234
Yes!
407
00:20:08,267 --> 00:20:11,501
Barely.
Yes!
408
00:20:11,534 --> 00:20:13,033
What are you gonna do now?
409
00:20:13,067 --> 00:20:16,100
Take the summer off...
Caddy a little bit...
410
00:20:17,801 --> 00:20:20,767
hang out at the reservoir
with my buds.
411
00:20:21,868 --> 00:20:24,234
This is great.
412
00:20:24,267 --> 00:20:27,033
Yeah, it is.
I'm glad I did this.
413
00:20:27,067 --> 00:20:30,067
You may think
this is just a degree,
414
00:20:30,100 --> 00:20:32,400
but it's gonna change
the way people look at you.
415
00:20:32,434 --> 00:20:34,367
They're gonna see you
as a little wiser
416
00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:36,501
and, more importantly,
a little more mature.
417
00:20:36,534 --> 00:20:40,067
You're absolutely right,
Caitlin.
418
00:20:40,100 --> 00:20:41,234
Where are you going?
419
00:20:41,267 --> 00:20:43,634
The theta delta formal.
420
00:20:49,767 --> 00:20:53,501
Wildcat football rules!
421
00:20:58,067 --> 00:21:00,400
What happened
to the water cooler?
422
00:21:00,434 --> 00:21:01,734
It wasn't working.
423
00:21:01,767 --> 00:21:04,701
Say, you hear they discovered
water on Mars?
424
00:21:04,734 --> 00:21:07,100
They say oceans
may have existed there.
425
00:21:07,133 --> 00:21:08,834
Well, what do you know?
426
00:21:08,868 --> 00:21:12,567
Don't look now, sir,
but this is water-cooler talk.
427
00:21:12,601 --> 00:21:15,634
I'll be damned. It is.
Carter, continue!
428
00:21:15,667 --> 00:21:18,234
If water was discovered there,
429
00:21:18,267 --> 00:21:20,367
some form of life
may have existed.
430
00:21:20,400 --> 00:21:21,968
Primordial seas
may have spawned
431
00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:23,434
single-celled organisms.
432
00:21:23,467 --> 00:21:25,234
Boring!
433
00:21:25,267 --> 00:21:27,868
Come on, Paul...
meat-cone time!
434
00:21:27,901 --> 00:21:29,601
You just read my mind.
435
00:21:29,634 --> 00:21:32,100
Sit, ubu, sit. Good dog.31836
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof