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1
00:00:04,903 --> 00:00:07,972
"Tenderloin
with lobster Risotto"?
2
00:00:08,006 --> 00:00:09,941
Rags loves
his surf and turf.
3
00:00:09,975 --> 00:00:11,943
Just look
at him light up!
4
00:00:14,146 --> 00:00:17,181
Carter, this stuff
is $15 a can!
5
00:00:17,216 --> 00:00:19,350
$15 a can?!
6
00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:21,820
For dog food?!
7
00:00:21,854 --> 00:00:25,423
Gee, I could buy
Claudia a dress with that!
8
00:00:25,458 --> 00:00:27,592
Well, rags is worth
every penny.
9
00:00:27,627 --> 00:00:30,928
Now, if you'll excuse me,
we're gonna go take a walk
10
00:00:30,963 --> 00:00:33,331
so he can generate
some saliva.
11
00:00:33,366 --> 00:00:35,166
15 bucks a can.
12
00:00:35,201 --> 00:00:40,572
What could possibly be worth
15 bucks a can?
13
00:00:43,008 --> 00:00:44,576
Wow.
14
00:00:44,610 --> 00:00:47,612
You can actually see
little bits of lobster.
15
00:01:08,501 --> 00:01:10,302
Might want to crack
an egg in there.
16
00:01:11,537 --> 00:01:14,172
Makes your coat
nice and shiny.
17
00:01:14,174 --> 00:01:15,740
[ACOUSTIC GUITAR PLAYS]
18
00:01:40,699 --> 00:01:42,867
Sir, you need to see
this new commercial
19
00:01:42,901 --> 00:01:44,769
from the
Michael lauman campaign.
20
00:01:44,803 --> 00:01:47,172
I gotta warn you...
you're not gonna like it,
21
00:01:47,206 --> 00:01:51,242
at least not as much
as "the real world uncensored."
22
00:01:52,377 --> 00:01:55,180
The alcoholic girl
takes her shirt off.
23
00:02:02,888 --> 00:02:05,756
[CROWD CHEER]
24
00:02:05,791 --> 00:02:09,327
MAN: Is this really who you wantrepresenting you in Washington?
25
00:02:09,362 --> 00:02:11,663
Paid for by the Michael laumnfor senate campaign.
26
00:02:11,697 --> 00:02:14,065
Of course,
they use the cotton candy.
27
00:02:14,100 --> 00:02:16,234
What about the hot dog,
the nachos?
28
00:02:16,268 --> 00:02:18,569
I ate those so well,
people cheered!
29
00:02:19,905 --> 00:02:21,239
They're gonna run the spot,
30
00:02:21,273 --> 00:02:23,275
so we gotta come up
with a response.
31
00:02:23,309 --> 00:02:25,477
Mike, this is my job,
and I will take care of it.
32
00:02:25,511 --> 00:02:28,079
I say we hit back hard and
below the belt where it counts.
33
00:02:28,113 --> 00:02:29,580
Again and again
and again!
34
00:02:30,916 --> 00:02:32,217
Don't you agree?
35
00:02:32,251 --> 00:02:34,586
I'm certainly
not gonna disagree.
36
00:02:38,658 --> 00:02:41,192
He really crossed a line
with this ad,
37
00:02:41,226 --> 00:02:44,429
and we have to respond with
something equally provocative.
38
00:02:44,463 --> 00:02:45,930
Here's an ad age article
39
00:02:45,964 --> 00:02:48,200
on the top 10
commercial directors.
40
00:02:48,234 --> 00:02:51,269
Wait a minute, why are the top
two on the list crossed off?
41
00:02:51,304 --> 00:02:53,705
Oh, well, trust me.
You can't get those guys.
42
00:02:53,739 --> 00:02:55,307
Ah ha.
I can get anyone.
43
00:02:55,341 --> 00:02:58,810
Well, that guy's dead.
44
00:02:58,844 --> 00:03:00,645
Okay, he could be tough.
45
00:03:00,680 --> 00:03:03,815
Well, what about this guy,
this Trevor wolf?
46
00:03:03,849 --> 00:03:06,518
Oh, no, no, not him.
We don't want him.
47
00:03:06,552 --> 00:03:07,752
Why not?
48
00:03:07,786 --> 00:03:09,521
Well, he's not right.
49
00:03:09,555 --> 00:03:11,856
He's... Way out of our league.
50
00:03:11,890 --> 00:03:14,792
Caitlin, you stilldon't understand
51
00:03:14,826 --> 00:03:17,828
how much power
I wield in this town.
52
00:03:17,863 --> 00:03:20,731
I want to get somethin' done,
it gets done,
53
00:03:20,766 --> 00:03:22,200
no questions asked.
54
00:03:22,234 --> 00:03:25,569
Janelle, get me Trevor wolf's
agent on the phone.
55
00:03:25,604 --> 00:03:26,571
Not now.
56
00:03:28,140 --> 00:03:30,174
I don't know.
57
00:03:30,209 --> 00:03:32,844
Can't you just call back?
58
00:03:32,878 --> 00:03:35,680
She's on a pay phone.
59
00:03:35,682 --> 00:03:37,915
Put her on hold.
60
00:03:37,950 --> 00:03:39,784
I could.
61
00:03:39,818 --> 00:03:43,287
Not going to.
62
00:03:43,321 --> 00:03:46,524
Okay, thanks.
Sorry, janelle.
63
00:03:46,559 --> 00:03:47,925
She's all over it.
64
00:03:51,497 --> 00:03:54,466
Hey, Nikki, listen... do I have
something on my cheek?
65
00:03:54,500 --> 00:03:57,101
I'm feeling some irritation,
some itchiness.
66
00:03:57,136 --> 00:03:59,870
Oh, yeah, it looks like some
kind of allergic reaction.
67
00:03:59,905 --> 00:04:02,706
Did you eat anything out
of the ordinary this morning?
68
00:04:02,741 --> 00:04:03,841
No.
69
00:04:03,875 --> 00:04:06,477
Oh, wait, wait.
Does dog food count?
70
00:04:06,511 --> 00:04:07,478
Paul!
71
00:04:07,512 --> 00:04:08,679
Oh, God.
72
00:04:08,713 --> 00:04:11,049
Oh, God,
is it getting worse?
73
00:04:11,083 --> 00:04:15,586
Oh, no,
but your breath is!
74
00:04:15,620 --> 00:04:18,722
Jeez, chew a milk-bone
or something, will you?
75
00:04:18,757 --> 00:04:20,191
Oh, God,
I can't have a rash.
76
00:04:20,225 --> 00:04:21,792
I'm going
on "the view" tomorrow
77
00:04:21,827 --> 00:04:23,794
to talk about
the campaign commercials.
78
00:04:23,829 --> 00:04:25,930
This is a glamour business!
79
00:04:25,965 --> 00:04:28,699
This face puts food
on my table!
80
00:04:28,734 --> 00:04:30,802
And then, it sucks it
right back up!
81
00:04:32,838 --> 00:04:33,838
Sorry I'm late.
82
00:04:33,873 --> 00:04:35,172
What happened?
83
00:04:35,207 --> 00:04:37,875
The ladder fell and you couldn't
get out of the bunk bed?
84
00:04:37,910 --> 00:04:40,345
No, no, no,
I have a slide now.
85
00:04:40,379 --> 00:04:41,979
I couldn't wake up.
86
00:04:42,013 --> 00:04:44,248
I was having
this incredibly vivid dream
87
00:04:44,282 --> 00:04:46,584
I was an astronaut
blasting off into space.
88
00:04:46,618 --> 00:04:48,619
You ever have
a dream like that?
89
00:04:48,653 --> 00:04:49,620
No.
90
00:04:49,654 --> 00:04:52,056
I don't have gay dreams.
91
00:04:52,090 --> 00:04:54,859
It wasn't a gay dream.
It was a space dream.
92
00:04:54,893 --> 00:04:56,260
James, think about it.
93
00:04:56,295 --> 00:04:58,997
You got into a rocket
filled with buff guys,
94
00:04:59,031 --> 00:05:02,266
and you went to the moon
so you could have hot man sex
95
00:05:02,301 --> 00:05:04,535
without your parents
finding out.
96
00:05:08,407 --> 00:05:10,575
Wait a minute, Stuart,
I'm not gay.
97
00:05:10,609 --> 00:05:13,411
Fine, why don't we do
a little psychological test?
98
00:05:13,446 --> 00:05:17,115
I say a word and you say the
first word that comes to mind.
99
00:05:17,149 --> 00:05:19,050
Okay.
100
00:05:19,084 --> 00:05:20,951
Super.
Man.
101
00:05:20,986 --> 00:05:21,886
Spider.
Man.
102
00:05:21,920 --> 00:05:23,053
Aqua.
Man.
103
00:05:29,127 --> 00:05:31,429
Mike, why are you going
through all this trouble?
104
00:05:31,464 --> 00:05:33,598
Because Caitlin said
I couldn't get this guy
105
00:05:33,632 --> 00:05:34,632
to do her commercial.
106
00:05:34,666 --> 00:05:36,033
You're always showing off.
107
00:05:36,068 --> 00:05:37,635
Like when you made
fun of her yoga,
108
00:05:37,670 --> 00:05:40,238
and she said, "you can't get
your legs behind your head."
109
00:05:40,272 --> 00:05:42,373
I did it, didn't I?
110
00:05:42,408 --> 00:05:44,742
Yes, and the paramedics
were very impressed.
111
00:05:46,745 --> 00:05:49,047
Carter, let me explain
something to you, okay?
112
00:05:49,081 --> 00:05:50,515
Right now, to Caitlin,
113
00:05:50,517 --> 00:05:53,050
I am just another
handsome, successful guy
114
00:05:53,085 --> 00:05:55,453
who can put his legs
behind his head.
115
00:05:55,488 --> 00:05:58,322
But if I get this Trevor
to do our commercial,
116
00:05:58,357 --> 00:06:00,457
well, then, hey,
I'm the man.
117
00:06:00,492 --> 00:06:02,126
Good luck dealing with him.
118
00:06:02,160 --> 00:06:03,995
He's supposed to be
a huge egomaniac.
119
00:06:04,029 --> 00:06:08,766
I can handle egomaniacs. All you
have to do is flatter them.
120
00:06:08,800 --> 00:06:12,370
That is so smart.
Brilliant, actually.
121
00:06:12,404 --> 00:06:15,739
See, you get me.
122
00:06:17,576 --> 00:06:20,244
[BRITISH ACCENT] I'm looking
for a Mike Flaherty.
123
00:06:20,278 --> 00:06:22,080
Hey, I'm a Mike Flaherty.
124
00:06:22,114 --> 00:06:24,014
How are you?
You must be Trevor.
125
00:06:24,049 --> 00:06:25,349
This is Carter Heywood.
126
00:06:25,384 --> 00:06:26,417
Oh, thank you.
127
00:06:26,452 --> 00:06:27,952
I'm sorry I'm late.
128
00:06:27,986 --> 00:06:30,588
Bloody hate this town.
It's a poor man's London.
129
00:06:30,623 --> 00:06:32,790
Well, you know,
Trevor, uh...
130
00:06:32,824 --> 00:06:35,760
Sometimes I bloody hate
this town, too.
131
00:06:35,794 --> 00:06:38,796
You know
what I bloody loved?
132
00:06:38,830 --> 00:06:41,198
Your Ty-d-bol commercial.
133
00:06:41,232 --> 00:06:43,534
Oh, I was a whore
to do that ad.
134
00:06:43,569 --> 00:06:45,903
No, my real passion's
my movies.
135
00:06:45,937 --> 00:06:48,372
Really? I haven't
seen any of those.
136
00:06:48,407 --> 00:06:51,609
Ah, it's because
they're all in my head.
137
00:06:51,643 --> 00:06:53,277
Really, you know,
138
00:06:53,312 --> 00:06:56,614
a lot of directors now are
putting their movies on film.
139
00:06:56,648 --> 00:06:58,649
My movies are
too insane for film!
140
00:06:58,683 --> 00:07:00,417
You know what
my problem is?
141
00:07:00,452 --> 00:07:02,920
Uh, crazy movies
in your head?
142
00:07:02,954 --> 00:07:06,724
No, I'm a genius, which means
people rarely understand me.
143
00:07:06,758 --> 00:07:08,159
Oh, I'm sure.
144
00:07:08,193 --> 00:07:10,528
But I must say,
for such a brilliant man,
145
00:07:10,562 --> 00:07:12,964
you really know how
to put people at ease.
146
00:07:12,998 --> 00:07:16,000
You know what?
You get me.
147
00:07:17,969 --> 00:07:21,873
James, you left
a message on my voice mail,
148
00:07:21,907 --> 00:07:24,408
something about being gay?
149
00:07:24,442 --> 00:07:26,911
Oh, false alarm.
I had one gay space dream.
150
00:07:26,945 --> 00:07:28,313
But last night, nothing.
151
00:07:28,347 --> 00:07:29,813
So, you know... straight.
152
00:07:29,848 --> 00:07:34,718
I'm here if you wanna talk
because, you know... gay.
153
00:07:34,753 --> 00:07:37,788
You're a good friend,
Carter.
154
00:07:39,658 --> 00:07:41,926
Aw, yeah!
155
00:07:43,495 --> 00:07:45,796
Whoa!
156
00:07:48,701 --> 00:07:50,668
Something the matter?
157
00:07:50,703 --> 00:07:53,738
I had a dream
where I kissed Carter.
158
00:07:53,772 --> 00:07:55,906
I'm starting to worry.
159
00:07:55,940 --> 00:07:59,310
You shou be worried.
160
00:07:59,344 --> 00:08:02,846
Worried about
making me jealous.
161
00:08:06,284 --> 00:08:09,454
Okay, two dreams
doesn't mean I'm gay.
162
00:08:09,488 --> 00:08:12,490
That's what you think,
sugar lips.
163
00:08:15,994 --> 00:08:19,096
I'm gay.
164
00:08:20,298 --> 00:08:22,500
Whoa, whoa, whoa,
easy with that stuff.
165
00:08:22,534 --> 00:08:24,969
I can't believe I let you
talk me into this.
166
00:08:25,003 --> 00:08:27,004
Technically, you begged me.
167
00:08:27,038 --> 00:08:29,841
I asked you if there was
any skin-colored cream
168
00:08:29,875 --> 00:08:32,276
or powder
to disguise facial blemishes.
169
00:08:32,310 --> 00:08:34,679
You're the one
who took it to makeup.
170
00:08:34,713 --> 00:08:37,515
There, pretty as a...
171
00:08:37,550 --> 00:08:39,183
Done.
172
00:08:39,217 --> 00:08:42,921
Oh, I can't wear makeup.
173
00:08:42,955 --> 00:08:45,023
Better wash this off.
174
00:08:45,057 --> 00:08:46,824
Hey, Paul,
you look great.
175
00:08:46,858 --> 00:08:48,392
Did you lose some weight?
176
00:08:48,427 --> 00:08:50,828
Yes.
177
00:08:50,862 --> 00:08:53,497
Yes, I did.
178
00:08:53,532 --> 00:08:57,702
Five minutes, my office...
bring the blush.
179
00:08:57,736 --> 00:08:59,037
You just sign here...
180
00:08:59,071 --> 00:09:01,472
Trevor wolf,
the ungettable director...
181
00:09:01,507 --> 00:09:03,575
[CHUCKLES]
182
00:09:03,609 --> 00:09:05,409
...and I will sign here...
183
00:09:05,443 --> 00:09:08,913
Mike Flaherty,
the guy who got him.
184
00:09:08,948 --> 00:09:12,316
Get Caitlin, the woman who's
gonna be incredibly impressed.
185
00:09:14,252 --> 00:09:16,087
Caitlin Moore's
our campaign manager.
186
00:09:16,121 --> 00:09:18,556
Caitlin Moore is
running this campaign?
187
00:09:18,590 --> 00:09:19,624
Yeah, you know her?
188
00:09:19,658 --> 00:09:21,726
I should say so.
189
00:09:21,760 --> 00:09:23,061
We were married.
190
00:09:23,095 --> 00:09:27,198
You... you were married?
191
00:09:27,232 --> 00:09:28,432
Hitched!
192
00:09:28,466 --> 00:09:30,367
Yes, we had a whole
ball and chain.
193
00:09:30,402 --> 00:09:31,936
We were knocking boots.
194
00:09:31,970 --> 00:09:33,671
It was all legal, baby.
195
00:09:36,075 --> 00:09:37,909
Caitie!
196
00:09:37,943 --> 00:09:39,077
Trevor!
197
00:09:39,111 --> 00:09:40,678
[LAUGHS]
198
00:09:42,414 --> 00:09:44,181
Can you hold this?
199
00:09:44,215 --> 00:09:48,018
I'm just gonna put my legs
behind my head.
200
00:10:00,698 --> 00:10:02,599
Can't wait
to get started.
201
00:10:02,634 --> 00:10:04,468
Oh, this is unbelievable.
202
00:10:04,503 --> 00:10:06,603
I am so excited
about this.
203
00:10:06,638 --> 00:10:07,805
Oh, you're great.
204
00:10:07,840 --> 00:10:09,974
No, you're great.
205
00:10:13,478 --> 00:10:16,480
You idiot!
206
00:10:16,515 --> 00:10:17,815
What?!
207
00:10:17,849 --> 00:10:19,783
How could you hire
my ex-husband?!
208
00:10:19,817 --> 00:10:22,619
Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot to ask
that standard question...
209
00:10:22,654 --> 00:10:26,424
"have you ever been married
to our campaign manager?"
210
00:10:26,458 --> 00:10:28,859
I'm hiring a new custodian
this afternoon.
211
00:10:28,893 --> 00:10:31,162
You got anything
you wanna get off your chest?
212
00:10:31,196 --> 00:10:33,230
What are youso upset about?
213
00:10:33,265 --> 00:10:36,633
How could you not tell me
that you were married?
214
00:10:36,668 --> 00:10:38,869
Since when are we sharing
our personal lives?
215
00:10:38,903 --> 00:10:41,071
I tell you everythingabout my personal life!
216
00:10:41,106 --> 00:10:43,841
Mike, you don't
have a personal life.
217
00:10:43,875 --> 00:10:45,676
Hey, I went out last Friday.
218
00:10:45,711 --> 00:10:46,410
With Carter.
219
00:10:46,445 --> 00:10:48,779
And his mom.
220
00:10:48,813 --> 00:10:51,815
How can you be married
to this guy?
221
00:10:51,850 --> 00:10:53,317
I mean, he is such a...
222
00:10:53,352 --> 00:10:55,653
he's a... he is a...
he's a...
223
00:10:55,687 --> 00:10:58,755
he's a tool.
224
00:10:58,790 --> 00:11:00,190
I was young.
225
00:11:00,225 --> 00:11:02,826
I was working in London,
and he swept me off my feet.
226
00:11:02,860 --> 00:11:05,429
Oh, this is gonna be
so awkward for me!
227
00:11:05,464 --> 00:11:08,265
Tell you what...
I'm just gonna fire him.
228
00:11:08,300 --> 00:11:10,067
No, no, no, no.
You can't do that.
229
00:11:10,102 --> 00:11:11,368
I'll be fine.
230
00:11:11,403 --> 00:11:13,337
I'll keep things
professional this time.
231
00:11:13,371 --> 00:11:16,006
What do you mean,
"this time"?
232
00:11:16,040 --> 00:11:18,576
Well, the last time
we saw each other,
233
00:11:18,777 --> 00:11:20,110
we kind of... you know.
234
00:11:20,145 --> 00:11:22,246
Eww!
235
00:11:26,718 --> 00:11:28,685
Oh, where'd you
get that stuff?
236
00:11:28,720 --> 00:11:30,854
Macy's.
237
00:11:32,591 --> 00:11:36,193
How can I bring out
my eyes more?
238
00:11:36,228 --> 00:11:38,195
Well, women
use eyeliner for that.
239
00:11:38,230 --> 00:11:40,631
Cough it up.
240
00:11:40,665 --> 00:11:44,669
I said, "womenuse eyeliner for that."
241
00:11:44,703 --> 00:11:47,171
You can't believe
the compliments I'm getting.
242
00:11:47,205 --> 00:11:48,539
When I'm on "the view" today,
243
00:11:48,574 --> 00:11:50,908
I'm gonna have those women
eating out of my...
244
00:11:50,942 --> 00:11:52,343
Dog dish?
245
00:11:54,779 --> 00:11:57,582
Hey, Paul, did you hear?
246
00:11:58,917 --> 00:12:01,785
I'm gay.
247
00:12:01,819 --> 00:12:05,689
Am I the only real man
left in this office?
248
00:12:09,828 --> 00:12:12,462
James?
What's with the shirt?
249
00:12:12,497 --> 00:12:14,398
Oh, haven't you heard?
250
00:12:14,432 --> 00:12:16,667
I'm out!
Queer and here, fella!
251
00:12:16,702 --> 00:12:19,269
Two dreams,
I'm as gay as they get.
252
00:12:19,304 --> 00:12:21,271
No, you're not.
253
00:12:21,306 --> 00:12:24,274
Oh, yeah? Then why did
I shave my chest this morning?
254
00:12:24,309 --> 00:12:26,877
I don't know.
255
00:12:26,911 --> 00:12:30,948
James... This is Robert
from accounting.
256
00:12:30,982 --> 00:12:33,050
I thought you two might...
257
00:12:35,253 --> 00:12:36,954
...hit it off.
258
00:12:36,988 --> 00:12:39,824
Robert from accounting,
I hope you play for our team,
259
00:12:39,858 --> 00:12:41,925
because the field
has just been mowed.
260
00:12:45,197 --> 00:12:46,664
Do you hate New York?
261
00:12:46,698 --> 00:12:49,233
Drugs dealers
put me in Washington.
262
00:12:49,267 --> 00:12:51,369
Cut!!
263
00:12:52,804 --> 00:12:55,940
Where the pause lands
is quite critical.
264
00:12:55,974 --> 00:12:59,176
It's, "do you hate
New York drug dealers?
265
00:12:59,211 --> 00:13:01,044
Put in Washington."
266
00:13:03,981 --> 00:13:06,450
That's good, too.
267
00:13:08,086 --> 00:13:10,387
Carter. Mike.
268
00:13:10,422 --> 00:13:12,155
Caitlin.
269
00:13:12,190 --> 00:13:14,892
You look... Beautiful,
elegant.
270
00:13:14,926 --> 00:13:15,793
Why?
271
00:13:15,827 --> 00:13:18,295
What are you
talking about?
272
00:13:18,330 --> 00:13:19,563
Well, look at you.
273
00:13:19,598 --> 00:13:21,465
The dress, the shoes,
your...
274
00:13:21,500 --> 00:13:24,334
your hair is up.
You nev wear your hair up.
275
00:13:24,369 --> 00:13:25,603
I do!
276
00:13:25,671 --> 00:13:27,271
You always
wear it straight.
277
00:13:27,305 --> 00:13:28,639
Sometimes you pull it back
278
00:13:28,674 --> 00:13:30,708
with the little red
scrunchie thing,
279
00:13:30,742 --> 00:13:32,710
a-and last Wednesday...
280
00:13:32,744 --> 00:13:36,813
I have a phenomenal memory
for hair.
281
00:13:36,848 --> 00:13:38,649
Carter?
282
00:13:38,683 --> 00:13:40,618
Bald.
283
00:13:40,652 --> 00:13:42,686
Mike, I know
what you're thinking,
284
00:13:42,721 --> 00:13:44,722
and I did not do thisfor Trevor.
285
00:13:44,756 --> 00:13:47,625
Caitlin, I love it
when you wear your hair up.
286
00:13:47,659 --> 00:13:49,960
Live and learn.
287
00:13:49,994 --> 00:13:52,195
I thought you and I
might grab a bite later
288
00:13:52,230 --> 00:13:54,398
if there's an opening
in your "shedule."
289
00:13:54,432 --> 00:13:56,032
"Shedule."
290
00:13:56,067 --> 00:13:57,601
Schedule.
291
00:13:57,636 --> 00:14:00,571
You could show me what
new yorkers do for "lesure."
292
00:14:00,605 --> 00:14:02,706
Leisure.
293
00:14:02,741 --> 00:14:06,109
It's a hard "e"
this side of the pond, Ringo.
294
00:14:06,144 --> 00:14:08,712
Michael...
295
00:14:08,747 --> 00:14:10,381
It might interest you
to know
296
00:14:10,415 --> 00:14:12,183
that we invented
the language.
297
00:14:12,217 --> 00:14:15,686
Although, to be fair,
you did give us pac-man.
298
00:14:15,721 --> 00:14:18,355
And we can
take that back, pal!
299
00:14:18,389 --> 00:14:19,990
I'm probably crazy,
300
00:14:20,024 --> 00:14:22,860
but do you think
there's a chance
301
00:14:22,894 --> 00:14:25,195
she's fallin' for him again?
302
00:14:25,229 --> 00:14:26,263
I don't know.
303
00:14:26,297 --> 00:14:29,700
Think there's a chance
I'm black?
304
00:14:29,734 --> 00:14:31,669
I'm serious.
305
00:14:31,703 --> 00:14:35,005
I'm picking up
kind of a vibe here.
306
00:14:35,039 --> 00:14:38,476
Yeah, it's called
"raw animal lust."
307
00:14:38,510 --> 00:14:41,178
Remember when I said
that somewhere out there
308
00:14:41,212 --> 00:14:42,680
is a guy just for you?
309
00:14:42,714 --> 00:14:45,616
That's the kind of bull
I'm lookin' for right now!
310
00:14:47,585 --> 00:14:50,220
How'd your date
with Robert go?
311
00:14:50,255 --> 00:14:51,421
I'm not gay.
312
00:14:53,157 --> 00:14:55,058
Hey, uh, trev...
313
00:14:55,093 --> 00:15:00,464
What do you think of this
commercial we're making?
314
00:15:00,498 --> 00:15:02,299
It's a bit
of a "how-do-you-do."
315
00:15:02,333 --> 00:15:05,136
Exactly! It should be
more of a...
316
00:15:05,170 --> 00:15:06,504
a "what's all that, then?"
317
00:15:06,538 --> 00:15:08,238
Exactly.
318
00:15:08,273 --> 00:15:10,741
You know what?
319
00:15:10,776 --> 00:15:12,777
I'm not gonna
handcuff you anymore.
320
00:15:12,811 --> 00:15:15,680
You know those insane movies
you have in your head?
321
00:15:15,714 --> 00:15:17,715
Let's see some of thatin the commercial.
322
00:15:17,749 --> 00:15:18,982
Carte blanche?
323
00:15:19,016 --> 00:15:21,251
Yes. Go nuts. Make art.
324
00:15:21,285 --> 00:15:24,655
If I understand it,
well, then, hey, you failed.
325
00:15:24,689 --> 00:15:27,057
Mike, I think
I've misjudged you.
326
00:15:27,092 --> 00:15:30,828
Do you think the mayor
will do full frontal nudity?
327
00:15:30,862 --> 00:15:33,697
Couldn't hurt to ask.
328
00:15:45,710 --> 00:15:48,813
Welcome back. We are talking
with Paul lassiter,
329
00:15:48,847 --> 00:15:50,647
press secretary
to the mayor of New York.
330
00:15:50,682 --> 00:15:51,915
Paul, thanks for coming.
331
00:15:51,950 --> 00:15:53,918
Thank you for having me.
332
00:15:53,952 --> 00:15:57,054
And may I say that
from where I sit...
333
00:15:57,089 --> 00:15:59,023
The view is just fine.
334
00:15:59,124 --> 00:16:00,523
[LAUGHTER]
335
00:16:00,558 --> 00:16:02,793
Have you seen
these cotton-candy commercials
336
00:16:02,828 --> 00:16:04,061
Michael lauman is running?
337
00:16:04,096 --> 00:16:05,829
What'll the mayor do about that?
338
00:16:05,863 --> 00:16:07,364
The mayor and I feel
339
00:16:07,399 --> 00:16:09,366
that we're not gonna
reduce this campaign
340
00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:10,801
to petty mudslinging.
341
00:16:10,836 --> 00:16:15,505
What we want to do is deal
with the important issues...
342
00:16:15,540 --> 00:16:18,842
how do you get your eyelashes
so full?
343
00:16:18,877 --> 00:16:21,545
Just the way I was born.
344
00:16:21,579 --> 00:16:23,480
Gotcha.
We'll talk later.
345
00:16:23,515 --> 00:16:26,250
I think that the mayor
ought to strike back
346
00:16:26,284 --> 00:16:29,353
at this lauman character.
347
00:16:29,388 --> 00:16:30,921
To do nothing
makes him look wimpy.
348
00:16:30,956 --> 00:16:35,892
And I think someone is wearing
a little too much Rouge.
349
00:16:35,927 --> 00:16:37,561
What?!
350
00:16:37,596 --> 00:16:38,896
We'll talk later.
351
00:16:40,031 --> 00:16:43,267
You seem
preoccupied with makeup.
352
00:16:43,301 --> 00:16:45,536
[LAUGHS]
That's ridiculous!
353
00:16:45,570 --> 00:16:47,371
[LAUGHING]
354
00:16:47,405 --> 00:16:50,608
Are you wearin'...
he's wearin' eyeliner!
355
00:16:50,642 --> 00:16:52,610
And you have mascara on!
356
00:16:52,644 --> 00:16:54,378
No, no, no!
No, I'm not!
357
00:16:54,412 --> 00:16:56,913
All right, I am!
I'm wearing makeup!
358
00:16:56,948 --> 00:16:59,483
Lots of it!
Why shouldn't I?!
359
00:16:59,517 --> 00:17:02,753
Is it so wrong for a man
360
00:17:02,787 --> 00:17:05,121
to want to accent
his cheekbones,
361
00:17:05,156 --> 00:17:06,923
maybe hide some laugh lines,
362
00:17:06,957 --> 00:17:08,392
and, yes... look sexy?
363
00:17:08,426 --> 00:17:10,260
[APPLAUSE]
364
00:17:10,295 --> 00:17:11,995
Thank you! Thank you!
365
00:17:12,029 --> 00:17:14,431
Why should makeup
only be for women?!
366
00:17:14,465 --> 00:17:16,400
Right! Right!
367
00:17:16,434 --> 00:17:18,969
Why should dog food
only be for dogs?!
368
00:17:20,805 --> 00:17:22,573
Okay, we'll be back
369
00:17:22,607 --> 00:17:26,109
with some home makeover tips
right after this.
370
00:17:26,143 --> 00:17:27,678
Can I stay?
No.
371
00:17:34,252 --> 00:17:35,452
[CLEARS THROAT]
372
00:17:35,486 --> 00:17:37,320
The following
is Trevor wolf's first...
373
00:17:37,355 --> 00:17:39,189
and, I certainly hope,
not only...
374
00:17:39,223 --> 00:17:41,759
campaign commercial
for the mayor's senate run.
375
00:17:41,793 --> 00:17:43,127
Oh, I should say
376
00:17:43,161 --> 00:17:45,696
Trevor had complete
creative control on this,
377
00:17:45,730 --> 00:17:47,998
so what you're about to see
is a window
378
00:17:48,033 --> 00:17:50,300
into his talented,
talented mind.
379
00:17:53,171 --> 00:17:54,705
[INDUSTRIAL MUSIC PLAYS]
380
00:17:54,739 --> 00:17:56,740
MAN: Washington.
381
00:17:57,942 --> 00:18:00,977
Hut! Hut! Hut! Hut!Hut! Hut! Hu!
382
00:18:01,012 --> 00:18:03,580
Hut! Hut! Hu!
383
00:18:06,851 --> 00:18:08,985
[MEOWS]
384
00:18:09,020 --> 00:18:11,321
[WOMAN LAUGH]
385
00:18:11,356 --> 00:18:14,458
Cat got your tongue?
386
00:18:27,805 --> 00:18:32,175
Well, it looks like
the cat has all our tongues.
387
00:18:32,209 --> 00:18:33,577
Two paws up.
388
00:18:33,611 --> 00:18:37,280
Good job, Trevor!
Loved it.
389
00:18:37,314 --> 00:18:38,682
Fire him.
390
00:18:38,716 --> 00:18:41,552
Trevor, uh, this is
the part of the job
391
00:18:41,586 --> 00:18:43,120
that's really tough.
392
00:18:43,154 --> 00:18:45,789
Well, for you.
You're fired.
393
00:18:45,823 --> 00:18:48,058
Fired?
394
00:18:48,092 --> 00:18:52,262
Yeah, fired.
I'm, uh... Sacking you.
395
00:18:52,297 --> 00:18:56,466
Well... Your tea is weak!
396
00:18:58,236 --> 00:19:00,003
You deliberately set him up
397
00:19:00,038 --> 00:19:02,172
just so you could
get rid of him!
398
00:19:02,207 --> 00:19:05,475
Hey, all I do
is give them enough rope.
399
00:19:05,509 --> 00:19:07,444
He tied a clown to it.
400
00:19:17,422 --> 00:19:18,855
How you doin'?
401
00:19:18,890 --> 00:19:21,358
Oh, great.
402
00:19:23,295 --> 00:19:28,098
So, um... You wanna talk about
this whole Caitlin thing?
403
00:19:28,133 --> 00:19:31,167
Wouldn't that...
Be kind of weird?
404
00:19:31,202 --> 00:19:33,403
It's okay, Mike.
We're over.
405
00:19:33,437 --> 00:19:36,974
I've slept with, like,
20 guys since we broke up.
406
00:19:38,376 --> 00:19:40,577
I'm kidding.
407
00:19:40,611 --> 00:19:43,013
[LAUGHS]
408
00:19:43,048 --> 00:19:46,450
That's really...
409
00:19:46,484 --> 00:19:49,119
by how much
are you kidding?
410
00:19:49,153 --> 00:19:52,022
It's so obvious
you have a thing for Caitlin.
411
00:19:52,057 --> 00:19:55,926
You know me
better than anyone else.
412
00:19:55,961 --> 00:19:57,461
I just don't know
what to do.
413
00:19:57,495 --> 00:19:59,629
[SIGHS]
414
00:19:59,664 --> 00:20:00,965
You know, Mike?
415
00:20:00,999 --> 00:20:03,367
Part of the reason
that you and I didn't work out
416
00:20:03,401 --> 00:20:05,802
is because you're always
protecting yourself.
417
00:20:05,837 --> 00:20:07,737
We knew each other
for three years
418
00:20:07,772 --> 00:20:09,473
before you even kissed me.
419
00:20:11,676 --> 00:20:14,544
Just waiting
for the perfect moment.
420
00:20:14,579 --> 00:20:15,779
No such thing.
421
00:20:15,813 --> 00:20:18,382
If you want
the perfect moment,
422
00:20:18,416 --> 00:20:20,050
you got to create it.
423
00:20:20,085 --> 00:20:23,653
I just wouldn't
wait that long with Caitlin.
424
00:20:29,995 --> 00:20:32,062
Thanks, Nik.
425
00:20:43,341 --> 00:20:44,842
I'll give her
another year.
426
00:20:54,585 --> 00:20:56,086
Hey, Stuart.
427
00:20:56,120 --> 00:20:59,422
I think I figured out why
you played that trick on James.
428
00:20:59,457 --> 00:21:01,124
Because
I'm a heartless bastard
429
00:21:01,159 --> 00:21:03,293
who revels
in the misery of innocence?
430
00:21:03,328 --> 00:21:07,363
Maybe you're suppressing certain
gay urges within yourself?
431
00:21:07,398 --> 00:21:10,100
Oh, Carter, shut up.
432
00:21:10,134 --> 00:21:12,202
And kiss me.
433
00:21:17,642 --> 00:21:20,143
MAN: Sit, ubu, sit.
Good dog.
434
00:21:20,177 --> 00:21:21,211
(Barking)30530
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