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1
00:00:02,334 --> 00:00:04,835
Sir, what's this I hear
about you not attending
2
00:00:04,870 --> 00:00:06,938
the annual mayor's conference
tonight?
3
00:00:06,972 --> 00:00:08,106
I'm not going.
4
00:00:08,140 --> 00:00:09,941
Yes. Yes, you are, sir.
5
00:00:09,975 --> 00:00:12,643
Mayor garver of Springfield
isn't going.
6
00:00:12,678 --> 00:00:15,746
Well, mayor garver
of Springfield is in prison.
7
00:00:15,781 --> 00:00:19,417
So if you get arrested
on federal racketeering charges,
8
00:00:19,451 --> 00:00:21,153
you can skip stuff, too.
9
00:00:21,187 --> 00:00:23,121
Mike, I don't have a date,
10
00:00:23,155 --> 00:00:27,425
and all of the other mayors
are gonna make fun of me.
11
00:00:27,460 --> 00:00:30,128
Sir, they're not
gonna make fun of you,
12
00:00:30,162 --> 00:00:31,529
and if they do,
13
00:00:31,564 --> 00:00:35,300
it's 'cause they don't know
how special you are.
14
00:00:35,334 --> 00:00:37,502
It's that damn mayor Reese
of Miami.
15
00:00:37,536 --> 00:00:39,070
Every year, he struts in
16
00:00:39,104 --> 00:00:41,606
with a different
beautiful blonde.
17
00:00:41,640 --> 00:00:44,542
And every year,
the breasts are bigger.
18
00:00:44,577 --> 00:00:47,412
It's the same woman, sir.
19
00:00:47,446 --> 00:00:48,914
I'm tired of it, Mike.
20
00:00:48,948 --> 00:00:50,682
You know, since my divorce,
21
00:00:50,716 --> 00:00:53,484
the only two women
I've been intimate with
22
00:00:53,519 --> 00:00:56,154
are janelle
and, of course, your mother.
23
00:00:56,189 --> 00:01:01,159
God, she was passionate,
Mike.
24
00:01:01,193 --> 00:01:05,963
Bold... Yet so giving.
25
00:01:05,998 --> 00:01:08,065
Well, thank you, sir.
26
00:01:08,100 --> 00:01:12,804
We're all very proud
of mom's lovemaking prowess.
27
00:01:12,838 --> 00:01:15,006
You should have
no problem getting a date
28
00:01:15,040 --> 00:01:16,341
for the conference tonight.
29
00:01:16,375 --> 00:01:18,343
Look at you, sir.
Take a look at yourself.
30
00:01:18,377 --> 00:01:20,344
You're a powerful,
handsome man.
31
00:01:20,379 --> 00:01:22,513
You're right, Mike!
I can do this!
32
00:01:22,548 --> 00:01:24,615
I'm gonna handle
my social life
33
00:01:24,650 --> 00:01:26,784
the same way
that I run this city.
34
00:01:26,818 --> 00:01:28,253
Mike, find me a date!
35
00:01:29,721 --> 00:01:32,023
[ACOUSTIC GUITAR PLAYS]
36
00:01:57,450 --> 00:02:00,819
Okay. Whatever woman the mayor
takes to the conference
37
00:02:00,853 --> 00:02:02,053
is gonna reflect on him.
38
00:02:02,087 --> 00:02:03,588
So we need to find him
39
00:02:03,622 --> 00:02:06,090
someone charming,
sophisticated and brilliant...
40
00:02:06,124 --> 00:02:07,759
Not to mention,
a head-Turner.
41
00:02:07,793 --> 00:02:11,195
Caitlin,
I'm not puttin' on a wig.
42
00:02:11,230 --> 00:02:12,697
What about Amanda berard?
43
00:02:12,732 --> 00:02:15,767
She has her own publishing
company, a phd from Harvard,
44
00:02:15,801 --> 00:02:18,403
and she's on the board
of the children's hospital.
45
00:02:18,437 --> 00:02:20,038
Sounds great.
Let me see her.
46
00:02:20,106 --> 00:02:23,208
She's not smart enough.
47
00:02:23,242 --> 00:02:27,445
Too late. I've invited her and
other women to a reception,
48
00:02:27,480 --> 00:02:30,448
and hopefully, one of them
will hit it off with the mayor.
49
00:02:30,482 --> 00:02:31,816
[WHISTLING]
50
00:02:31,850 --> 00:02:35,320
Carter, what do you think
of this woman for the mayor?
51
00:02:35,354 --> 00:02:36,821
Not, uh, smart enough.
52
00:02:36,855 --> 00:02:38,622
[CLEARS THROAT]
53
00:02:38,657 --> 00:02:39,757
Carter, of all people,
54
00:02:39,791 --> 00:02:42,160
I expected youto be more sensitive.
55
00:02:42,194 --> 00:02:44,162
I'm gay, not blind.
56
00:02:48,200 --> 00:02:50,835
So, the mayor put you
in charge
57
00:02:50,870 --> 00:02:52,637
of finding him a date.
58
00:02:52,672 --> 00:02:54,673
Yep, that's right.
59
00:02:54,707 --> 00:02:56,174
Ha-ha ha-ha.
60
00:02:56,208 --> 00:02:58,076
What's that supposed to mean?
61
00:02:58,110 --> 00:02:59,076
Nothing.
62
00:02:59,110 --> 00:03:02,480
I'm sure there's
a patronizing commentary
63
00:03:02,515 --> 00:03:04,482
on the ass end of that
ha-ha ha-ha.
64
00:03:04,516 --> 00:03:06,584
No, no.
Nothing at all.
65
00:03:06,652 --> 00:03:08,552
Good.
66
00:03:08,587 --> 00:03:10,688
I just find it ironic, Mike,
67
00:03:10,722 --> 00:03:14,325
that the mayor chose someone
to find him a date
68
00:03:14,359 --> 00:03:17,095
who can't find a date
for himself.
69
00:03:17,163 --> 00:03:18,729
I have plenty of dates.
70
00:03:18,764 --> 00:03:20,565
I had two dates this week.
71
00:03:20,599 --> 00:03:22,467
Renting a video
two nights in a row
72
00:03:22,501 --> 00:03:24,936
from the same woman
does not constitute dating.
73
00:03:24,970 --> 00:03:28,172
Friday, she recommended
"carnal knowledge."
74
00:03:28,206 --> 00:03:29,874
Saturday, "toy story."
75
00:03:29,908 --> 00:03:31,575
"Toy story."
What does that mean?
76
00:03:31,610 --> 00:03:34,612
I don't know.
You think I should dump her?
77
00:03:34,680 --> 00:03:36,881
Frankly, I think the reason
you're not dating
78
00:03:36,915 --> 00:03:38,950
is you're a little stuck
on you-know-who.
79
00:03:38,984 --> 00:03:41,286
Hey, I worked that out
in therapy.
80
00:03:41,320 --> 00:03:43,621
I'm not in love with myself
anymore.
81
00:03:43,689 --> 00:03:45,290
I was talking about Caitlin.
82
00:03:45,324 --> 00:03:46,857
I'm not interested
in Caitlin.
83
00:03:46,892 --> 00:03:49,394
I haven't dated 'cause I
haven't found the right woman.
84
00:03:49,428 --> 00:03:51,763
Yeah, Mike,
whatever you say.
85
00:03:51,831 --> 00:03:53,131
[DOOR CLOSES]
86
00:03:53,165 --> 00:03:55,300
I still love you.
87
00:03:56,835 --> 00:03:59,737
I'm so glad we're taking
this art class together.
88
00:03:59,772 --> 00:04:02,173
Just hurry up.
I gotta get back to work.
89
00:04:02,208 --> 00:04:05,976
And... I'm done.
90
00:04:06,011 --> 00:04:10,648
James, I'm naked!
91
00:04:10,683 --> 00:04:12,550
Well,
we've only sketched nudes.
92
00:04:12,585 --> 00:04:14,386
I don't know how
to do clothes.
93
00:04:14,420 --> 00:04:16,788
Well, learn,
you little pervert.
94
00:04:18,357 --> 00:04:21,726
Hey, James, where's
the press release on...
95
00:04:21,760 --> 00:04:24,328
Nikki yum yum.
96
00:04:24,363 --> 00:04:25,630
Give me that!
97
00:04:25,664 --> 00:04:26,931
Hey, I need that!
98
00:04:26,965 --> 00:04:29,100
There's a sketch of Paul
in there!
99
00:04:29,134 --> 00:04:31,902
Uuuggghhh.
100
00:04:31,937 --> 00:04:34,772
I'm taking an art class
with Nikki and janelle.
101
00:04:34,806 --> 00:04:36,107
You should join us.
102
00:04:36,141 --> 00:04:38,008
James, the day I set foot
in an art class...
103
00:04:38,043 --> 00:04:40,612
there's nude models.
Is tonight!
104
00:04:40,646 --> 00:04:46,384
Yes! Yes! My paycheck just came,
and I got 20 extra bucks!
105
00:04:46,418 --> 00:04:47,952
20 bucks! Yeah!
106
00:04:47,986 --> 00:04:50,388
Great. Now you can pay me
the 15 bucks you owe me.
107
00:04:50,423 --> 00:04:52,323
Get a lawyer.
108
00:04:52,357 --> 00:04:55,359
This is Carter's check.
109
00:04:55,394 --> 00:04:58,095
Carter makes more money
than me?
110
00:04:58,130 --> 00:05:04,101
Paul, I think we got each
other's checks by mistake.
111
00:05:04,136 --> 00:05:05,970
We did.
112
00:05:06,004 --> 00:05:07,204
Ha!
113
00:05:07,239 --> 00:05:08,939
I hope it doesn't bother you
114
00:05:08,974 --> 00:05:11,810
that I make a little bit
more money than you.
115
00:05:11,844 --> 00:05:13,043
Please, Carter.
116
00:05:13,078 --> 00:05:17,181
It'll take a lot more
to hurt our friendship
117
00:05:17,215 --> 00:05:20,050
than $899.43 a year
after taxes.
118
00:05:20,085 --> 00:05:21,886
Good.
119
00:05:21,921 --> 00:05:24,889
Oh!
120
00:05:26,425 --> 00:05:27,959
What's the matter...
121
00:05:27,993 --> 00:05:31,162
your big, fat wallet
didn't break your fall?!
122
00:05:33,031 --> 00:05:35,766
It's a room full of very
interesting women, sir.
123
00:05:35,801 --> 00:05:37,769
Just go in there
and mingle.
124
00:05:37,803 --> 00:05:39,136
I'm very nervous.
125
00:05:39,171 --> 00:05:42,173
I've had rotten luck
with women lately.
126
00:05:42,207 --> 00:05:44,309
Well, sir,
you know what they say...
127
00:05:44,343 --> 00:05:46,143
when you fall off
a horse...
128
00:05:46,178 --> 00:05:48,045
I know.
Fire the stable manager.
129
00:05:48,079 --> 00:05:50,415
I just wish
I had a good pickup line,
130
00:05:50,449 --> 00:05:53,250
something that would separate me
from the crowd.
131
00:05:53,285 --> 00:05:56,187
I'd go with,
"hi, I'm the mayor."
132
00:05:56,221 --> 00:05:57,922
Just go in there
and talk to them.
133
00:05:57,956 --> 00:06:01,459
[EXHALING]
Hoooo.
134
00:06:01,493 --> 00:06:03,161
All right.
He's in the room.
135
00:06:03,195 --> 00:06:05,163
He's circling.
He's circling the ro...
136
00:06:05,197 --> 00:06:06,564
ah, he's found somebody.
137
00:06:06,598 --> 00:06:09,233
He spotted somebody
he feels comfortable talking to.
138
00:06:09,268 --> 00:06:10,602
He's makin' his move.
139
00:06:10,636 --> 00:06:13,170
Like a hunter
zeroing in on the kill.
140
00:06:13,205 --> 00:06:15,406
Hello, sir.
141
00:06:15,441 --> 00:06:16,941
What am I doing wrong?
142
00:06:16,975 --> 00:06:21,078
Say something. "I find you
interesting and attractive."
143
00:06:21,112 --> 00:06:24,515
I think
you're swell, too, Mike.
144
00:06:24,550 --> 00:06:26,484
Come on, sir.
I'll go with you.
145
00:06:28,654 --> 00:06:31,155
[WHISTLING]
146
00:06:31,189 --> 00:06:33,290
Excuse me.
147
00:06:33,325 --> 00:06:35,259
Hi. I'm looking
for Caitlin Moore.
148
00:06:35,294 --> 00:06:37,995
There's got to be some mistake.
You're too young.
149
00:06:38,029 --> 00:06:40,364
Uh, what is it...
150
00:06:40,399 --> 00:06:42,600
A haunted house?
151
00:06:42,634 --> 00:06:44,569
That's funny.
That's funny.
152
00:06:44,603 --> 00:06:47,238
No, it's a high-level
political function.
153
00:06:47,272 --> 00:06:48,406
Oh.
154
00:06:48,440 --> 00:06:53,411
And, uh, what are you,
security?
155
00:06:53,445 --> 00:06:56,247
Maybe.
156
00:06:56,281 --> 00:06:59,083
Don't they usually hire
a big, brawny guy for that?
157
00:06:59,117 --> 00:07:02,754
Kung fu.
158
00:07:02,788 --> 00:07:07,391
You gonna frisk me,
kung-fu man?
159
00:07:07,426 --> 00:07:08,893
You gonna make me?
160
00:07:08,928 --> 00:07:10,862
Are we flirting?
161
00:07:10,896 --> 00:07:13,397
If we're not, I'm really
embarrassed about the kung fu.
162
00:07:13,432 --> 00:07:14,732
Catherine.
163
00:07:14,767 --> 00:07:15,867
Mike.
164
00:07:15,901 --> 00:07:17,702
Are you single?
165
00:07:17,736 --> 00:07:18,803
Are you?
166
00:07:18,837 --> 00:07:20,638
Yeah.
Yeah, I am, actually.
167
00:07:20,673 --> 00:07:22,574
I just broke up
with someone.
168
00:07:22,608 --> 00:07:24,275
She's in the movie business.
169
00:07:27,946 --> 00:07:30,247
I didn't get into
your stupid art class, James.
170
00:07:30,281 --> 00:07:31,716
It's full.
171
00:07:31,750 --> 00:07:33,751
Did you put your name
on the waiting list?
172
00:07:33,785 --> 00:07:35,987
[SARCASTICALLY]
Yeah, right.
173
00:07:36,021 --> 00:07:39,724
I'm gonna get on a waiting list
just to see naked babes.
174
00:07:39,758 --> 00:07:42,159
Where is the waiting list?
175
00:07:46,865 --> 00:07:49,067
Oops!
176
00:07:49,101 --> 00:07:50,601
Paul!
177
00:07:50,635 --> 00:07:53,671
Why don't you have your Butler
clean it up for you?!
178
00:07:53,705 --> 00:07:55,606
Paul, I refuse
to feel guilty
179
00:07:55,641 --> 00:07:57,742
about making more money
than you.
180
00:07:57,776 --> 00:08:00,277
I work very hard,
and I earn every penny.
181
00:08:00,312 --> 00:08:02,279
Ha! I'm the press secretary.
182
00:08:02,314 --> 00:08:05,049
You're just
head of minority affairs.
183
00:08:05,083 --> 00:08:07,652
That's, like,
not even a real job.
184
00:08:07,686 --> 00:08:09,754
Minority affairs
happens to be
185
00:08:09,788 --> 00:08:12,557
the most challenging position
at city hall.
186
00:08:12,591 --> 00:08:15,893
Your job could be done by
a lazy, inebriated orangutan.
187
00:08:15,927 --> 00:08:18,896
Is that some sort
of a crack?
188
00:08:18,930 --> 00:08:20,998
I'm gonna do
one of your press conferences.
189
00:08:21,033 --> 00:08:22,666
I'm gonna do it
better than you.
190
00:08:22,701 --> 00:08:24,869
Nobody is more on top
of their job than I am!
191
00:08:24,903 --> 00:08:27,238
We'll see about that.
When's the next conference?
192
00:08:27,272 --> 00:08:29,707
I have no idea!
193
00:08:29,741 --> 00:08:31,842
Hey, Carter,
come in here for a sec.
194
00:08:31,876 --> 00:08:34,879
Yeah, Mike?
195
00:08:34,913 --> 00:08:37,248
You, my friend, are wrong.
196
00:08:37,282 --> 00:08:38,716
What are we talking about?
197
00:08:38,751 --> 00:08:40,584
I have a date tonight.
198
00:08:40,619 --> 00:08:44,689
Oh, returning "toy story"?
199
00:08:44,723 --> 00:08:47,125
No, I have a date
with someone I just met.
200
00:08:47,159 --> 00:08:49,627
She's smart, she's funny,
she's attractive.
201
00:08:49,662 --> 00:08:51,696
And best of all,
she's not Caitlin.
202
00:08:51,730 --> 00:08:55,566
Hey, guys,
have you met my sister?
203
00:08:55,600 --> 00:08:58,302
She's Caitlin's sister.
204
00:09:08,046 --> 00:09:11,549
[LAUGHING] So, Mike
is dating Caitlin's sister.
205
00:09:11,583 --> 00:09:13,784
Am I the only one
who finds this...
206
00:09:13,819 --> 00:09:16,354
yeah, I'm just gonna...
207
00:09:16,388 --> 00:09:19,256
Listen, Catherine, Mike and I
have a work thing to discuss.
208
00:09:19,290 --> 00:09:21,859
Okay. What do you think
tonight, Italian?
209
00:09:21,893 --> 00:09:23,394
I-I love Italian.
210
00:09:23,428 --> 00:09:25,929
Italian. Great.
Arrivederci.
211
00:09:25,964 --> 00:09:27,264
Oh, French is good.
212
00:09:27,298 --> 00:09:29,400
I know a great French place.
213
00:09:29,434 --> 00:09:31,635
Perfect. French.
Au revoir.
214
00:09:31,670 --> 00:09:35,272
Hey, you know what?
Have you ever tried Malaysian?
215
00:09:35,307 --> 00:09:36,541
No, but I'm game.
216
00:09:36,575 --> 00:09:38,642
Fantastic. Malaysian.
217
00:09:38,677 --> 00:09:40,845
Okay. Just go.
218
00:09:43,682 --> 00:09:46,717
Okay, Mike, I know
what you're trying to do here,
219
00:09:46,752 --> 00:09:48,252
but it's not gonna work.
220
00:09:48,286 --> 00:09:51,656
Are you kiddin'? A little
Coltrane, a pitcher of sangria,
221
00:09:51,690 --> 00:09:54,759
this look...
222
00:09:54,793 --> 00:09:56,561
Works every time.
223
00:09:56,595 --> 00:09:57,995
You know perfectly well
224
00:09:58,030 --> 00:10:00,364
you're just dating her
to bother me.
225
00:10:00,399 --> 00:10:03,067
I didn't even know
she was your sister.
226
00:10:03,102 --> 00:10:04,034
It bothers you?
227
00:10:04,069 --> 00:10:05,469
No.
228
00:10:05,503 --> 00:10:07,938
It bothers you.
229
00:10:07,973 --> 00:10:10,341
Mike, let me be clear.
Do whatever you want.
230
00:10:10,376 --> 00:10:12,209
Date my sister,
date my mother,
231
00:10:12,244 --> 00:10:14,379
date my golden retriever
for all I care.
232
00:10:14,413 --> 00:10:17,415
It doesn't bother me at all.
In fact, I am happy for you.
233
00:10:17,449 --> 00:10:19,484
[DOOR SLAMS]
234
00:10:19,518 --> 00:10:21,786
Got that?
I'm happy.
235
00:10:23,354 --> 00:10:26,791
The answer to every question
is "no comment."
236
00:10:26,825 --> 00:10:29,960
And when you start to fail,
and you will,
237
00:10:29,994 --> 00:10:31,896
just fake stomach cramps.
238
00:10:31,930 --> 00:10:33,731
Good afternoon,
ladies and gentlemen.
239
00:10:33,766 --> 00:10:35,833
I'm here to announce
240
00:10:35,868 --> 00:10:39,103
that the city will raise the
battery tunnel toll 25 cents.
241
00:10:39,138 --> 00:10:40,271
Any questions?
242
00:10:40,305 --> 00:10:43,007
What will the extra money
be used for?
243
00:10:43,041 --> 00:10:46,010
Well, it's earmarked
for general operations,
244
00:10:46,044 --> 00:10:49,213
not that they need it,
the way they waste money.
245
00:10:49,248 --> 00:10:51,548
How is the city
wasting taxpayers' money?
246
00:10:51,583 --> 00:10:53,751
Oh. I, uh...
247
00:10:53,785 --> 00:10:55,886
[NO AUDIO]
248
00:10:58,123 --> 00:10:59,323
No comment.
249
00:10:59,357 --> 00:11:00,324
Gotcha.
250
00:11:00,358 --> 00:11:02,760
Carter Heywood doesn't know.
251
00:11:02,794 --> 00:11:04,862
No, no, no, no.
Carter Heywood knows.
252
00:11:04,896 --> 00:11:06,997
In fact,
the city spent God knows what
253
00:11:07,031 --> 00:11:09,266
on a reception
to find the mayor a date.
254
00:11:09,301 --> 00:11:11,802
What, the mayor
can't find his own dates?
255
00:11:11,837 --> 00:11:13,871
No, I, uh...
256
00:11:13,905 --> 00:11:16,674
are you saying
these women were prostitutes?
257
00:11:16,708 --> 00:11:19,076
No, no, no, no.
That's not my point.
258
00:11:19,110 --> 00:11:20,578
So you have no comment then
259
00:11:20,612 --> 00:11:22,813
on the city hall
prostitution scandal?
260
00:11:22,848 --> 00:11:24,949
I, uh...
261
00:11:24,983 --> 00:11:27,317
Ooh. Bad Sushi.
262
00:11:32,958 --> 00:11:35,559
So, what'd you think
of the Malaysian place?
263
00:11:35,593 --> 00:11:37,528
Oh, I thought
it was excellent.
264
00:11:37,562 --> 00:11:39,931
You know, it's hard to find
good python in New York.
265
00:11:39,965 --> 00:11:41,032
[LAUGHS]
266
00:11:41,066 --> 00:11:43,434
I thought
it tasted just like chicken.
267
00:11:43,468 --> 00:11:47,405
Yeah, that's 'cause
it had just eaten one.
268
00:11:47,439 --> 00:11:49,407
You know, Caitlin told me
you were cute,
269
00:11:49,441 --> 00:11:51,309
but she didn't say
how funny you were.
270
00:11:51,343 --> 00:11:52,410
Really?
271
00:11:52,444 --> 00:11:55,112
Uh, Caitlin said I was cute?
272
00:11:55,147 --> 00:11:56,680
Yeah.
273
00:11:56,714 --> 00:11:59,216
But not funny.
274
00:11:59,251 --> 00:12:01,585
Well, she didn't say
you weren't funny.
275
00:12:01,619 --> 00:12:03,587
She just told me
you were cute.
276
00:12:03,621 --> 00:12:04,688
Well, I know I'm cute.
277
00:12:04,722 --> 00:12:10,127
I...Want her
to think I'm funny.
278
00:12:10,162 --> 00:12:14,698
You seem a little preoccupied
with Caitlin tonight.
279
00:12:14,733 --> 00:12:16,868
No, no, no.
That's silly.
280
00:12:16,902 --> 00:12:19,837
No. You are the only woman
on my mind.
281
00:12:19,872 --> 00:12:22,874
I-in fact,
I-if it's okay with you,
282
00:12:22,908 --> 00:12:27,311
I-I was thinking of...
Kissing you right now.
283
00:12:27,346 --> 00:12:29,413
Okay.
284
00:12:29,447 --> 00:12:32,116
[THINKING]
Here I go.
285
00:12:32,150 --> 00:12:33,918
I so want th.
286
00:12:38,890 --> 00:12:41,992
Mike, I love you.
287
00:12:45,296 --> 00:12:47,231
I've always loved you.
288
00:12:47,233 --> 00:12:48,799
And you were right
289
00:12:48,833 --> 00:12:52,302
about the mayor's position
on recycling.
290
00:12:52,337 --> 00:12:54,204
I know.
291
00:13:04,182 --> 00:13:05,649
Mike.
292
00:13:05,683 --> 00:13:07,017
Mike!
293
00:13:07,052 --> 00:13:09,286
I'm right here.
294
00:13:09,320 --> 00:13:12,222
Yeah, yeah.
No, I'm... I'm just, uh...
295
00:13:12,256 --> 00:13:13,924
Warmin' these babies up.
296
00:13:16,194 --> 00:13:18,829
Thank you for being my date
tonight, Caitlin.
297
00:13:18,863 --> 00:13:21,198
It's above and beyond
the call of duty.
298
00:13:21,232 --> 00:13:24,468
I'm honored to be escorting
such a high caliber of woman.
299
00:13:24,502 --> 00:13:27,204
There's mayor Reese.
300
00:13:27,238 --> 00:13:30,474
Lose a button.
301
00:13:30,508 --> 00:13:33,610
So, who did you bring
to this function last year?
302
00:13:33,645 --> 00:13:34,611
Mike.
303
00:13:34,646 --> 00:13:37,481
And between you and me,
304
00:13:37,515 --> 00:13:39,917
mayor Reese
was not impressed.
305
00:13:39,951 --> 00:13:41,185
What is it with Mike?
306
00:13:41,219 --> 00:13:42,820
What kind of a name is that?
307
00:13:42,854 --> 00:13:44,922
It doesn't even sound
like a name.
308
00:13:44,956 --> 00:13:48,793
Mikey Mike.
Mikey Mike Mike Mike.
309
00:13:48,827 --> 00:13:52,296
You know
what's another stupid name?
310
00:13:52,330 --> 00:13:53,397
Otto.
311
00:13:53,431 --> 00:13:55,933
He has some good qualities.
312
00:13:55,967 --> 00:13:58,135
That's what makes him
so maddening.
313
00:13:58,170 --> 00:14:01,805
In prep school,
there was this guy named Otto.
314
00:14:01,840 --> 00:14:03,441
He was from mobile.
315
00:14:03,475 --> 00:14:06,110
Do you know
what we called him?
316
00:14:06,144 --> 00:14:08,979
Fatso.
317
00:14:09,013 --> 00:14:10,281
He's not even my type.
318
00:14:10,315 --> 00:14:12,015
So what
if he's dating my sister?
319
00:14:12,050 --> 00:14:13,417
It doesn't bother me a bit.
320
00:14:13,452 --> 00:14:17,854
Caitlin...
When I was younger,
321
00:14:17,889 --> 00:14:20,157
there was this woman
that I was quite fond of.
322
00:14:20,191 --> 00:14:22,192
And I don't know,
maybe it was my pride,
323
00:14:22,227 --> 00:14:27,131
maybe it was my vanity,
or maybe I was just afraid,
324
00:14:27,165 --> 00:14:30,834
but I never told her
of my feelings,
325
00:14:30,869 --> 00:14:34,037
and she married
somebody else.
326
00:14:34,072 --> 00:14:36,440
I regret it to this day.
327
00:14:36,475 --> 00:14:39,910
I understand
what you're trying to say, sir.
328
00:14:39,944 --> 00:14:40,944
Thank you.
329
00:14:43,448 --> 00:14:47,485
Oh, no, wait. I did tell her,
and she keyed my car.
330
00:14:56,128 --> 00:14:59,196
What are you doing here?
I thought the class was full.
331
00:14:59,231 --> 00:15:02,532
It is, but they're doing
couples posing tonight.
332
00:15:02,567 --> 00:15:04,134
We're ready to begin.
333
00:15:04,169 --> 00:15:06,503
Will the model
assume his pose?
334
00:15:06,537 --> 00:15:07,838
That's my cue.
335
00:15:07,872 --> 00:15:11,541
I'll be naked with a woman,
and for once,
336
00:15:11,576 --> 00:15:13,010
I'm gettin' paid.
337
00:15:13,044 --> 00:15:15,445
Hi.
338
00:15:15,480 --> 00:15:17,514
He wouldn't.
339
00:15:17,548 --> 00:15:19,649
He couldn't.
340
00:15:22,787 --> 00:15:24,255
It's art class.
341
00:15:24,289 --> 00:15:27,258
We will just treat him
as if he was any other model.
342
00:15:27,292 --> 00:15:30,661
Right. We won't give him
the satisfaction.
343
00:15:33,031 --> 00:15:36,566
Oh, my God.
344
00:15:37,502 --> 00:15:39,136
Damn.
345
00:15:40,305 --> 00:15:41,538
I'm getting some shadow.
346
00:15:41,572 --> 00:15:43,273
Could you turn around,
please?
347
00:15:45,810 --> 00:15:48,511
And that's the money shot.
348
00:15:50,548 --> 00:15:51,916
What's up?
349
00:15:51,950 --> 00:15:55,019
Where's my
where's my better naked half?
350
00:15:55,053 --> 00:15:56,753
Jason, are you ready?
351
00:15:56,788 --> 00:16:01,625
Jason? What kind of name is that
for an incredibly hot girl?
352
00:16:03,161 --> 00:16:05,162
Can you believe
we get paid for this?
353
00:16:09,134 --> 00:16:13,470
And that...
that is why, to this day,
354
00:16:13,504 --> 00:16:16,706
"shoeless" Joe Jackson
is not in the hall of fame.
355
00:16:16,741 --> 00:16:19,310
You know, I think
I'm gonna call it an evening,
356
00:16:19,344 --> 00:16:22,112
but thank you
because it was, uh...
357
00:16:22,147 --> 00:16:23,547
A night out of my apartment.
358
00:16:23,581 --> 00:16:26,550
Uh, Catherine, stick around.
359
00:16:26,584 --> 00:16:29,019
What for?
You're obviously not interested.
360
00:16:29,054 --> 00:16:31,721
No. Are you crazy?
I'm totally interested in you.
361
00:16:31,756 --> 00:16:34,491
If you were at college,
I would've majored in you.
362
00:16:34,525 --> 00:16:35,525
I would've...
363
00:16:37,362 --> 00:16:41,631
I hope
I wasn't too aggressive.
364
00:16:41,666 --> 00:16:43,867
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
365
00:16:43,901 --> 00:16:44,835
All right.
366
00:16:44,869 --> 00:16:46,603
D-don't... don't move.
367
00:16:46,637 --> 00:16:49,473
[CLEARS THROAT]
368
00:16:51,109 --> 00:16:52,843
Catherine,
I'm... I'm sorry.
369
00:16:52,877 --> 00:16:55,279
I just have to talk to Mike
for a second.
370
00:16:56,448 --> 00:16:57,581
Uh...
371
00:16:57,615 --> 00:17:02,486
Here's the $10
for the cab ride today.
372
00:17:02,520 --> 00:17:04,721
This couldn't wait?
373
00:17:04,755 --> 00:17:07,124
Well, I can't sleep
when I owe people money.
374
00:17:07,158 --> 00:17:08,125
Good night.
375
00:17:08,159 --> 00:17:10,294
I'm sorry.
376
00:17:10,328 --> 00:17:11,728
[DOOR CLOSES]
377
00:17:11,762 --> 00:17:14,465
Your sister must have
a great credit rating.
378
00:17:14,499 --> 00:17:16,967
Oh, let's not talk
about my sister.
379
00:17:17,002 --> 00:17:19,903
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
380
00:17:19,937 --> 00:17:22,139
[CLEARS THROAT]
381
00:17:22,173 --> 00:17:23,640
I'm sorry.
382
00:17:23,674 --> 00:17:26,143
I forgot about that lunch
last week...
383
00:17:26,177 --> 00:17:28,412
the soup
and the bread bowl place.
384
00:17:28,446 --> 00:17:29,946
Remember?
385
00:17:29,981 --> 00:17:32,916
I paid 'cause you forgot
your wallet, so you owe me $10.
386
00:17:32,950 --> 00:17:35,319
I think I have that on me.
387
00:17:35,353 --> 00:17:37,254
I'm glad
we took care of this.
388
00:17:37,289 --> 00:17:39,990
Sorry.
389
00:17:40,025 --> 00:17:41,225
[SIGHS]
390
00:17:41,259 --> 00:17:42,192
Now...
391
00:17:42,227 --> 00:17:44,061
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
392
00:17:44,095 --> 00:17:46,830
I wonder who that could be.
393
00:17:46,864 --> 00:17:51,468
Okay. You know what? This
is ridiculous. I'm gonna go.
394
00:17:51,503 --> 00:17:52,636
Oh, no, don't go.
395
00:17:52,670 --> 00:17:54,104
Yeah, I think I should.
396
00:17:54,139 --> 00:17:55,705
Okay.
397
00:17:57,175 --> 00:17:58,442
[SIGHS]
398
00:17:58,476 --> 00:18:00,544
Good night, Mike.
399
00:18:02,780 --> 00:18:04,915
Wow. That ended early.
400
00:18:06,651 --> 00:18:10,754
If I hurry, I could probably
share a ride with Catherine.
401
00:18:10,788 --> 00:18:11,955
I'll see ya later.
402
00:18:18,096 --> 00:18:21,565
You missed
a fantastic mayor's conference.
403
00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:24,668
I left with the mayor
of Bethesda...
404
00:18:24,703 --> 00:18:26,704
The honorable Mary Kelly.
405
00:18:26,738 --> 00:18:28,805
That's good, sir.
I hope you had a good time.
406
00:18:28,840 --> 00:18:33,677
Let's just say we passed
a little legislation.
407
00:18:33,711 --> 00:18:37,147
I'm, uh,
I'm happy for you, sir.
408
00:18:37,181 --> 00:18:39,316
I gave her
the old key to the city,
409
00:18:39,351 --> 00:18:40,650
if you catch my drift.
410
00:18:42,687 --> 00:18:44,421
Yes, I do, sir.
Loud and clear.
411
00:18:44,455 --> 00:18:47,891
We took a little ride
on the "f" train.
412
00:18:51,129 --> 00:18:53,063
Uh, Mike...
413
00:18:53,098 --> 00:18:55,632
Caitlin. Caitlin.
414
00:18:55,666 --> 00:18:59,536
So, how goes the war on fun?
415
00:18:59,571 --> 00:19:00,904
Mike, my sister told me
416
00:19:00,938 --> 00:19:04,041
you spent a lot of time
talking about me last night.
417
00:19:04,075 --> 00:19:06,977
Yeah, well,
that's move number one.
418
00:19:07,011 --> 00:19:10,648
Talk about your date's sister,
gets chicks hot.
419
00:19:10,682 --> 00:19:14,084
In retrospect, maybe goin' out
with your sister
420
00:19:14,118 --> 00:19:16,119
wasn't the best thing to do.
421
00:19:16,154 --> 00:19:20,357
And maybe the whole "storming
into your apartment" plan
422
00:19:20,392 --> 00:19:22,426
could've used a rethink.
423
00:19:22,460 --> 00:19:23,293
I'm sorry.
424
00:19:23,328 --> 00:19:27,264
I'm... I'm sorry, too.
425
00:19:33,504 --> 00:19:35,371
[SNIFFS]
426
00:19:38,409 --> 00:19:40,644
Did you just smell me?
427
00:19:42,547 --> 00:19:46,716
No. No. It's called
breathing through my nose,
428
00:19:46,751 --> 00:19:49,319
so I can, you know,
like, live.
429
00:19:49,354 --> 00:19:51,855
You sure squeezed
hard enough.
430
00:19:51,889 --> 00:19:54,424
I was just trying
to be nice.
431
00:19:54,459 --> 00:19:57,827
Yeah. By coppin' a feel?
432
00:19:57,862 --> 00:20:00,864
That is the last hug
you will ever get from me.
433
00:20:00,898 --> 00:20:01,931
That's fine.
434
00:20:01,966 --> 00:20:03,567
If I want a hug,
435
00:20:03,601 --> 00:20:06,203
I'll get one from your sister
'cause she wants me.
436
00:20:08,906 --> 00:20:11,808
So, you ready for lunch?
437
00:20:11,842 --> 00:20:12,876
Sure.
438
00:20:18,816 --> 00:20:20,818
James, you, uh,
439
00:20:20,852 --> 00:20:24,955
you want to send a dozen roses
over to Pam at blockbuster?
440
00:20:33,264 --> 00:20:34,464
Rule number one... you have
handled my press conference?
441
00:20:34,498 --> 00:20:37,434
You never tell the press
more than you have to.
442
00:20:37,468 --> 00:20:40,938
Therefore, the correct answer
to the question was "huh?"
443
00:20:43,241 --> 00:20:44,608
That's absurd.
444
00:20:44,642 --> 00:20:47,310
You can't just shut down
a dialogue by saying, "huh?"
445
00:20:47,345 --> 00:20:48,979
Huh?!
446
00:20:49,013 --> 00:20:52,015
I said, "you can't
just shut down a dialogue
447
00:20:52,050 --> 00:20:53,349
by saying, 'huh?'"
448
00:20:53,384 --> 00:20:55,085
huh?!
449
00:20:57,488 --> 00:20:59,055
You know what?
450
00:20:59,090 --> 00:21:02,092
Unlike you, I'm man enough
to admit when I'm wrong.
451
00:21:02,126 --> 00:21:03,359
You know why?
452
00:21:03,394 --> 00:21:05,696
Because I've got class
and maturity.
453
00:21:05,730 --> 00:21:07,931
You know what else
I've got, Paul?
454
00:21:07,965 --> 00:21:09,265
$20 more than you!
455
00:21:09,300 --> 00:21:11,768
Every week, baby!
Read it and weep!
456
00:21:11,803 --> 00:21:12,969
Smell the green!
457
00:21:13,004 --> 00:21:15,572
Smell it, smell it,
smell it? A-ha!!
458
00:21:17,508 --> 00:21:20,144
MAN: Sit, ubu, sit.
Good dog.
459
00:21:20,178 --> 00:21:21,378
(BARKING)32116
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