Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,902 --> 00:00:05,370
Is it true the mayor
is running for the senate?
2
00:00:05,405 --> 00:00:07,806
Excellent question...
3
00:00:07,840 --> 00:00:11,777
very topical...
Very challenging.
4
00:00:11,811 --> 00:00:13,612
Before I answer,
5
00:00:13,646 --> 00:00:16,882
let me just take
a drink of water.
6
00:00:21,854 --> 00:00:25,156
As to whether the mayor will be
making any announcements,
7
00:00:25,191 --> 00:00:26,591
the answer is
"no comment."
8
00:00:26,625 --> 00:00:27,959
Mr. Flaherty!
9
00:00:27,993 --> 00:00:31,095
I think what Mike means
is "no."
10
00:00:31,130 --> 00:00:33,498
"Comment."
11
00:00:33,532 --> 00:00:36,434
Not "no comment."
Just plain "no."
12
00:00:38,470 --> 00:00:39,771
"Comment."
13
00:00:42,708 --> 00:00:45,176
Okay, next question.
14
00:00:45,211 --> 00:00:46,210
Do you think the fact
15
00:00:46,245 --> 00:00:48,212
that miss Moore and you
hate each other
16
00:00:48,247 --> 00:00:50,014
will hurt
the mayor's campaign?
17
00:00:50,049 --> 00:00:54,218
Okay, well,
t-that's an excellent question.
18
00:00:54,253 --> 00:00:56,688
It's very challenging...
19
00:00:56,722 --> 00:00:59,324
It's very, very topical.
20
00:01:04,196 --> 00:01:06,798
[ACOUSTIC GUITAR PLAYS]
21
00:01:31,624 --> 00:01:33,190
"With the
feud
22
00:01:33,225 --> 00:01:35,760
"between miss Moore
and Mr. Flaherty raging,
23
00:01:35,795 --> 00:01:37,662
"the question is,
24
00:01:37,697 --> 00:01:40,832
will there ever be peace
at city..."
25
00:01:48,174 --> 00:01:50,408
"...hall."
26
00:01:50,442 --> 00:01:53,678
What do the two of you
have to say for yourselves?
27
00:01:53,713 --> 00:01:56,480
Well, sir, I don't know
where they get this stuff,
28
00:01:56,515 --> 00:01:58,917
because, uh, we're just
teasin' each other.
29
00:01:58,951 --> 00:02:01,252
Right, teasing...
like when I say,
30
00:02:01,286 --> 00:02:03,654
"hey, Mike,
your playgroup called.
31
00:02:03,689 --> 00:02:06,658
Pool party's on.
Don't forget your floaties."
32
00:02:06,726 --> 00:02:08,559
O-or like when I say, uh,
33
00:02:08,594 --> 00:02:11,696
"hey, Caitlin,
it's getting dark outside.
34
00:02:11,731 --> 00:02:14,132
"Shouldn't you be
in the woods,
35
00:02:14,166 --> 00:02:16,634
terrorizing
student filmmakers?"
36
00:02:16,668 --> 00:02:20,671
Or when I walk in
on my cleaning lady buck naked.
37
00:02:25,344 --> 00:02:26,844
So, next item...
38
00:02:26,879 --> 00:02:29,981
choosing the location
for your official announcement.
39
00:02:30,016 --> 00:02:32,617
I'm thinking statue of liberty,
me at your side,
40
00:02:32,651 --> 00:02:35,252
Caitlin back at the office,
blowing up balloons.
41
00:02:37,322 --> 00:02:39,624
See, I was thinking
upstate farmhouse,
42
00:02:39,658 --> 00:02:40,925
me at your side,
43
00:02:40,960 --> 00:02:43,795
Mike back at the office
blowing up his date.
44
00:02:43,829 --> 00:02:46,398
All right, all right,
that's enough bickering!
45
00:02:46,432 --> 00:02:49,167
You know, what you two need
is couples counseling.
46
00:02:49,201 --> 00:02:51,336
It worked wonders
for me and my wife.
47
00:02:53,406 --> 00:02:55,740
Sir, she slept with
your brother
48
00:02:55,774 --> 00:02:57,976
and, uh,
tried to poison you.
49
00:02:59,478 --> 00:03:00,611
Stuart!
50
00:03:00,646 --> 00:03:02,747
Here's the multilingual
"kick me" sign
51
00:03:02,781 --> 00:03:04,215
you put on my back.
52
00:03:04,250 --> 00:03:07,852
Luigi, chao lin,
and running bear
53
00:03:07,886 --> 00:03:09,487
all got their kicks in.
54
00:03:10,489 --> 00:03:14,058
I'm sick
of your practical jokes.
55
00:03:14,093 --> 00:03:16,527
Paul... You're right.
56
00:03:16,629 --> 00:03:17,796
No more.
57
00:03:17,830 --> 00:03:18,964
Good.
58
00:03:23,836 --> 00:03:25,437
Well...
59
00:03:25,471 --> 00:03:26,671
One
more.
60
00:03:26,705 --> 00:03:28,907
[LAUGHING]
He got you again, Paul.
61
00:03:28,941 --> 00:03:32,309
Oh, uh, James,
can I get that pen back?
62
00:03:32,344 --> 00:03:33,144
Sure.
63
00:03:33,179 --> 00:03:34,946
[CHUCKLES]
64
00:03:34,980 --> 00:03:38,349
Stuart, that is the eighth
and final time I fall for that!
65
00:03:38,383 --> 00:03:40,551
James, you have
something on your face.
66
00:03:40,585 --> 00:03:42,586
Here?
67
00:03:42,621 --> 00:03:43,954
Uh, other side.
68
00:03:43,989 --> 00:03:45,056
There you go.
69
00:03:45,090 --> 00:03:46,223
Thanks, buddy.
70
00:03:48,126 --> 00:03:49,627
You know what, James?
71
00:03:49,661 --> 00:03:51,963
We should team up,
join forces,
72
00:03:51,997 --> 00:03:54,098
beat Stuart
at his own game.
73
00:03:54,132 --> 00:03:56,734
With our combined brainpower,
he can't beat us!
74
00:03:56,769 --> 00:03:58,169
You with me, buddy?
75
00:03:58,203 --> 00:03:59,370
Yeah!
76
00:04:04,143 --> 00:04:06,277
We're stuck, aren't we?
77
00:04:06,312 --> 00:04:07,445
Oh, yeah.
78
00:04:09,148 --> 00:04:10,715
Mike...
79
00:04:10,749 --> 00:04:12,516
Mike, what is this
all about?
80
00:04:12,551 --> 00:04:15,619
Since when do I wine and dine
millionaires for donations?
81
00:04:15,654 --> 00:04:17,355
You're a natural
for the job.
82
00:04:17,389 --> 00:04:19,557
Y-y-you're urbane,
sophisticated, witty.
83
00:04:19,591 --> 00:04:20,758
He's black, isn't he?
84
00:04:20,792 --> 00:04:22,760
Little bit.
85
00:04:22,794 --> 00:04:24,495
Black millionaire...
count me in!
86
00:04:24,529 --> 00:04:25,663
Me too!
87
00:04:25,697 --> 00:04:28,166
Hey,
off my black millionaire!
88
00:04:28,200 --> 00:04:29,567
His name is Nick Mitchell.
89
00:04:29,601 --> 00:04:32,270
Mike wants him to donate
computers to city schools.
90
00:04:32,304 --> 00:04:33,604
"Janelle Mitchell."
91
00:04:33,638 --> 00:04:35,840
[LAUGHS]
Can't want to meet him...
92
00:04:35,875 --> 00:04:38,009
And marry him.
93
00:04:38,043 --> 00:04:40,644
Can't wait till he leaves you
for his trophy wife.
94
00:04:49,054 --> 00:04:53,057
All we pretend to get along
in front of this therapist,
95
00:04:53,092 --> 00:04:55,126
and the mayor
will get off our backs.
96
00:04:55,160 --> 00:04:58,329
Okay. But I don't know much
about therapy. Do you?
97
00:04:58,363 --> 00:05:00,431
Why would I know
anything about therapy?
98
00:05:00,465 --> 00:05:03,534
Hey, Mike.
Good to see you again.
99
00:05:04,870 --> 00:05:07,071
So... The mayor says
100
00:05:07,105 --> 00:05:10,542
the two of you are having
trouble working together.
101
00:05:10,576 --> 00:05:13,044
Yeah, well, see,
this is ridiculous.
102
00:05:13,078 --> 00:05:14,779
I mean, just this morning,
103
00:05:14,813 --> 00:05:18,149
uh, Caitlin was telling me
h-how good-looking I am.
104
00:05:18,217 --> 00:05:21,719
Yes, Mike,
I was going on and on.
105
00:05:22,721 --> 00:05:24,656
Well, we're good to go.
106
00:05:24,690 --> 00:05:28,626
Uh, before you go,
let's try a little exercise.
107
00:05:28,661 --> 00:05:30,662
I call it "the safe box."
108
00:05:30,696 --> 00:05:33,331
Well, is there a phone
in the safe box?
109
00:05:33,365 --> 00:05:35,766
First, let me show you
how it works.
110
00:05:41,073 --> 00:05:43,641
I'm now in the safe box.
111
00:05:43,675 --> 00:05:47,912
I'm now doing an exercise called
"keeping a straight face."
112
00:05:47,946 --> 00:05:50,148
Mike...
113
00:05:50,182 --> 00:05:53,785
When you're in the safe box,
no one's allowed to attack you,
114
00:05:53,819 --> 00:05:56,187
so you can say
exactly what you feel.
115
00:05:56,221 --> 00:05:58,189
For instance...
116
00:05:58,223 --> 00:06:02,794
Mike, when you belittle
my therapeutic techniques,
117
00:06:02,828 --> 00:06:04,796
it hurts.
118
00:06:10,368 --> 00:06:12,804
I-I-I-I...
can I give it a...
119
00:06:12,838 --> 00:06:14,639
yeah, I wish you would.
120
00:06:14,673 --> 00:06:16,508
Just, uh...
121
00:06:16,542 --> 00:06:18,543
there we go.
122
00:06:20,913 --> 00:06:24,315
"Boo-hoo-hoo!
123
00:06:24,349 --> 00:06:26,718
I'm a lame therapist!"
124
00:06:28,687 --> 00:06:33,425
"A mean patient is belittling
my techniques and my box!"
125
00:06:33,459 --> 00:06:37,328
"They didn't prepare me for this
at fake-doctor school!"
126
00:06:38,997 --> 00:06:41,466
You're right...
the box rocks.
127
00:06:48,974 --> 00:06:50,608
The only reason
I got into this
128
00:06:50,642 --> 00:06:52,577
was because
I love technology.
129
00:06:52,611 --> 00:06:54,212
Suddenly,
I'm sitting on millions.
130
00:06:54,246 --> 00:06:55,913
But you know
what I realized?
131
00:06:55,947 --> 00:06:57,381
That it's all meaningless
132
00:06:57,415 --> 00:06:59,650
without someone
to share it with?
133
00:06:59,684 --> 00:07:01,085
No...
134
00:07:01,119 --> 00:07:03,921
that people find my jokes
a lot funnier now.
135
00:07:03,956 --> 00:07:05,489
Oh!
Oh!
136
00:07:05,523 --> 00:07:06,657
That's good!
137
00:07:06,691 --> 00:07:08,559
That's really...
138
00:07:08,593 --> 00:07:11,062
Know what I want
to know about technology?
139
00:07:11,096 --> 00:07:12,430
Are you single?
140
00:07:13,832 --> 00:07:17,134
Uh, I'm also fascinatedwith technology.
141
00:07:17,169 --> 00:07:18,969
So, are you?
142
00:07:19,004 --> 00:07:22,507
Actually, my partner and I
recently called it quits.
143
00:07:22,541 --> 00:07:24,442
But what about you, Carter?
144
00:07:24,477 --> 00:07:26,544
Surely you must be taken.
145
00:07:29,148 --> 00:07:31,882
And there it is.
146
00:07:31,917 --> 00:07:34,952
No, no, I-I'm not taken.
147
00:07:34,986 --> 00:07:38,022
Care to join me for a smoke
at the bar?
148
00:07:38,057 --> 00:07:39,156
Hmm?
149
00:07:39,191 --> 00:07:41,292
Sure.
150
00:07:41,327 --> 00:07:43,194
Excuse us.
151
00:07:45,831 --> 00:07:47,898
I don't want to brag...
152
00:07:47,933 --> 00:07:50,301
But I think I'm winning.
153
00:07:56,642 --> 00:07:57,708
Hey, Stuart! Come here!
154
00:07:57,742 --> 00:08:00,010
Check out my office!
It's really cool!
155
00:08:00,045 --> 00:08:01,212
Come! Check it out!
156
00:08:01,246 --> 00:08:03,347
Sure.
157
00:08:03,382 --> 00:08:05,349
Oh, boy,
this is gonna be great!
158
00:08:05,384 --> 00:08:07,785
You and me, partner...
straight to the top!
159
00:08:07,819 --> 00:08:09,554
A-a-nd break!
A-a-nd break!
160
00:08:10,723 --> 00:08:11,789
What's so cool in here?
161
00:08:11,824 --> 00:08:13,457
Check out the desk chair.
162
00:08:13,492 --> 00:08:16,160
Yeah, Stuart,
check out the desk chair.
163
00:08:18,864 --> 00:08:20,465
Wow!
164
00:08:22,334 --> 00:08:24,668
Very comfortable.
165
00:08:24,703 --> 00:08:26,737
Thanks, guys.
166
00:08:26,771 --> 00:08:29,407
I don't get it.
167
00:08:37,516 --> 00:08:39,417
[IMITATING THE ROAD RUNNER]
Meep meep!
168
00:08:39,451 --> 00:08:41,452
Buh-luh-luh-luh-luh-luh!
169
00:08:42,587 --> 00:08:43,721
Morning, sir.
170
00:08:43,756 --> 00:08:45,689
Uh, Caitlin, Michael.
171
00:08:45,724 --> 00:08:46,757
I was talking to tom.
172
00:08:46,791 --> 00:08:49,260
He thinks the conflict
in your relationship
173
00:08:49,294 --> 00:08:50,561
revolves around
me!
174
00:08:50,595 --> 00:08:51,696
That's ridiculous!
175
00:08:51,730 --> 00:08:52,930
Yeah!
176
00:08:52,964 --> 00:08:55,767
Is it possible that you have
some inner turmoil
177
00:08:55,801 --> 00:08:58,302
that the two of them
are picking up on?
178
00:08:58,337 --> 00:09:00,171
Ever since
this senate thing came up,
179
00:09:00,205 --> 00:09:01,672
I have had trouble sleeping.
180
00:09:01,706 --> 00:09:04,008
Maybe you're anxious
about a decision.
181
00:09:04,042 --> 00:09:05,676
Are you saying
I don't want to run?
182
00:09:05,710 --> 00:09:07,511
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
183
00:09:07,545 --> 00:09:11,316
Easy there,
"quack in the box"!
184
00:09:13,385 --> 00:09:15,019
Of course he wants to run!
185
00:09:15,053 --> 00:09:16,553
That's why he works so hard
186
00:09:16,588 --> 00:09:18,856
and never has a chance
to meet the right guy!
187
00:09:20,759 --> 00:09:23,661
Just last night...
I had this dream
188
00:09:23,696 --> 00:09:27,799
that I was walking down
the street of Washington, d.c.,
189
00:09:27,833 --> 00:09:31,336
and the capitol building
came out of the sky
190
00:09:31,370 --> 00:09:33,971
and smashed me
again and again and again!
191
00:09:35,540 --> 00:09:37,541
Somebody
wants to be senator!
192
00:09:38,910 --> 00:09:40,979
There may be another way
to interpret that.
193
00:09:41,013 --> 00:09:43,147
Maybe I don't
want to be a senator.
194
00:09:43,182 --> 00:09:44,948
Good.
Go there. Explore.
195
00:09:44,983 --> 00:09:48,219
No, no... stay here.
Stare at the floor.
196
00:09:50,822 --> 00:09:51,989
That's it!
197
00:09:52,023 --> 00:09:55,292
I never wanted to
be a senator.
198
00:09:55,327 --> 00:09:57,161
I'm out of the race!
199
00:09:59,198 --> 00:10:03,434
I'd like to introduce
you to a technique...
200
00:10:03,502 --> 00:10:06,203
I call
"the ass-whuppin' box"!
201
00:10:17,549 --> 00:10:18,749
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
202
00:10:18,783 --> 00:10:21,218
Oh, hey, that's good, sir.
203
00:10:21,252 --> 00:10:23,654
Clear your head
with a little practice-putting.
204
00:10:23,689 --> 00:10:24,922
My putting's fine, Mike.
205
00:10:24,956 --> 00:10:25,923
Fore!
206
00:10:25,957 --> 00:10:26,957
Aah!
207
00:10:29,294 --> 00:10:32,030
Want to try one?
208
00:10:32,064 --> 00:10:33,464
Uh, no, sir.
209
00:10:33,499 --> 00:10:36,701
A-after lunch, I've got
skeet shooting in the cafeteria.
210
00:10:36,735 --> 00:10:38,903
Ever since I decided
to give up this senate run,
211
00:10:38,937 --> 00:10:40,537
it's like this great weight
212
00:10:40,572 --> 00:10:42,807
has been lifted
off of my shoulders.
213
00:10:42,841 --> 00:10:46,844
I'm going to learn to paint,
plant a garden...
214
00:10:46,878 --> 00:10:49,113
Listen to the great books.
215
00:10:49,148 --> 00:10:51,182
B-but, sir...
216
00:10:51,216 --> 00:10:55,619
W-what about your lifelong dream
of taking me to Washington?
217
00:10:55,654 --> 00:10:57,588
You got to do this, sir.
218
00:10:57,622 --> 00:10:59,857
Give me
one good reason, Mike.
219
00:10:59,891 --> 00:11:02,427
You know what?
I'll give you 5,000.
220
00:11:04,429 --> 00:11:07,498
The campaign buttons came.
Y-you want to see one?
221
00:11:07,533 --> 00:11:10,068
The only button
I care about now, Mike,
222
00:11:10,102 --> 00:11:13,104
is the one marked "play"
that starts a good book.
223
00:11:13,138 --> 00:11:15,039
At least think about it.
224
00:11:15,073 --> 00:11:16,941
Don't need to!
My mind's made up!
225
00:11:16,975 --> 00:11:20,044
In fact, I am gonna go out and
tell the first reporter I see
226
00:11:20,078 --> 00:11:22,546
that Randall Winston
is out of the Senate Race!
227
00:11:22,580 --> 00:11:24,916
You know what?
I-I'll go tell the reporter.
228
00:11:24,918 --> 00:11:29,454
You stay here and practice
your, uh... D-driving.
229
00:11:29,488 --> 00:11:31,222
Am I late?
230
00:11:31,256 --> 00:11:32,656
Nope.
231
00:11:32,690 --> 00:11:38,129
The solid-gold hand is on
the diamond-encrusted 9.
232
00:11:38,163 --> 00:11:40,331
Wow!
Where did you get that?!
233
00:11:40,365 --> 00:11:41,799
Nick bought it for me...
234
00:11:41,833 --> 00:11:44,735
As a memento of the day
he bought me this suit.
235
00:11:44,769 --> 00:11:48,239
Hey, Carter, you look like
you slept with a million bucks.
236
00:11:49,708 --> 00:11:52,176
So, Carter, how
is your sugar daddy?
237
00:11:52,210 --> 00:11:54,544
Excuse me... he is
not a sugar daddy!
238
00:11:54,579 --> 00:11:56,113
He's a wealthy, older man
239
00:11:56,148 --> 00:11:58,882
who takes me out on dates
and buys me stuff.
240
00:11:58,917 --> 00:12:01,752
Apparently, you're the only one
he buys things for,
241
00:12:01,787 --> 00:12:03,287
because, according to this,
242
00:12:03,322 --> 00:12:05,423
he's never given a
cent to charity.
243
00:12:05,457 --> 00:12:07,691
Huh!
244
00:12:07,725 --> 00:12:09,126
Oh, my God!
245
00:12:09,161 --> 00:12:12,063
How could I fall for someone
who doesn't do charity work?
246
00:12:12,097 --> 00:12:14,999
Wouldn't bother
me.
247
00:12:15,033 --> 00:12:17,101
Stuart, dating
you is charity work.
248
00:12:18,736 --> 00:12:20,671
Jeez, I don't know, fellas.
249
00:12:20,705 --> 00:12:24,442
If Stuart gave me a face-mister,
I'd be suspicious.
250
00:12:32,517 --> 00:12:34,685
What do you propose
we do about this?
251
00:12:34,719 --> 00:12:36,586
Go to a Knicks game.
252
00:12:44,896 --> 00:12:47,131
Well, Mike, this is it.
253
00:12:47,166 --> 00:12:50,468
"Goodbye"
always sounds so final,
254
00:12:50,502 --> 00:12:52,336
so... Goodbye.
255
00:12:52,371 --> 00:12:54,605
What are you doing?!
Y-you can't quit!
256
00:12:54,640 --> 00:12:57,774
Mike, you heard the man...
he doesn't want to be senator.
257
00:12:57,809 --> 00:12:59,443
You think he wanted
to be mayor?
258
00:12:59,478 --> 00:13:02,046
He still thinks he's in
the witness-protection program.
259
00:13:02,080 --> 00:13:04,915
We got to get him
back in the race.
260
00:13:04,949 --> 00:13:07,685
We can't even order a pizza
without fighting.
261
00:13:07,719 --> 00:13:11,688
Meatless, cheeseless, sauceless
is not pizza... it's bread.
262
00:13:11,723 --> 00:13:13,124
See what I mean?
263
00:13:13,158 --> 00:13:14,492
Tell you what...
264
00:13:14,526 --> 00:13:17,461
why don't we, uh, try
this, uh, "safe box" thing?
265
00:13:17,495 --> 00:13:19,897
Oh, even you're
not a big-enough idiot
266
00:13:19,931 --> 00:13:21,932
to buy into
that psychobabble.
267
00:13:21,966 --> 00:13:25,069
Caitlin,
when you talk down to me...
268
00:13:25,103 --> 00:13:29,073
I-it frustrates me,
and it erodes my confidence.
269
00:13:29,107 --> 00:13:30,341
Oh, my God!
270
00:13:30,375 --> 00:13:33,277
You're in the box right now,
aren't you?
271
00:13:33,311 --> 00:13:35,079
Come in.
272
00:13:35,113 --> 00:13:36,880
Join me.
273
00:13:36,915 --> 00:13:38,049
No.
274
00:13:38,083 --> 00:13:40,584
I can't change
the mayor's mind myself!
275
00:13:40,618 --> 00:13:41,885
I need you!
276
00:13:41,920 --> 00:13:45,489
What did you say?
277
00:13:45,523 --> 00:13:49,627
The door was open.
You heard me.
278
00:13:49,661 --> 00:13:51,228
Fine. [SIGHS]
279
00:13:51,263 --> 00:13:53,430
W-w-watch your head.
280
00:13:55,700 --> 00:13:57,401
Okay, I'm in.
281
00:13:57,436 --> 00:13:58,769
Now what?
282
00:13:58,803 --> 00:14:00,271
Well, uh...
283
00:14:00,305 --> 00:14:02,473
[CLEARS THROAT]
284
00:14:07,345 --> 00:14:10,814
Y-you know, my parents
won't be home till 10:00.
285
00:14:18,357 --> 00:14:21,425
Nick...
I was just curious...
286
00:14:21,459 --> 00:14:23,761
what are some of
your favorite charities?
287
00:14:23,795 --> 00:14:25,396
Oh, I don't believe
in charity.
288
00:14:25,430 --> 00:14:26,997
Carter...
289
00:14:27,032 --> 00:14:29,967
If you give a man a fish,
you feed him for a day.
290
00:14:30,001 --> 00:14:33,304
If you teach a man to fish,
you feed him for a lifetime.
291
00:14:33,338 --> 00:14:35,806
That's the most self-serving
argument I ever heard!
292
00:14:35,840 --> 00:14:37,742
Carter, this is who I am.
293
00:14:37,776 --> 00:14:39,377
I can't just change.
294
00:14:39,411 --> 00:14:41,579
Then, uh...
295
00:14:41,613 --> 00:14:44,482
I'm sorry, Nick.
296
00:14:44,516 --> 00:14:45,949
As much as I like you,
297
00:14:45,984 --> 00:14:48,920
my principles won't permit me
to see you again.
298
00:14:48,954 --> 00:14:50,254
Oh.
299
00:14:50,288 --> 00:14:53,857
I don't suppose
I could change your mind
300
00:14:53,891 --> 00:14:55,559
with
this?
301
00:14:58,396 --> 00:15:02,032
No. You can't.
302
00:15:02,067 --> 00:15:03,567
But thank you.
303
00:15:05,503 --> 00:15:07,471
Excuse me, sir,
you got a minute?
304
00:15:07,505 --> 00:15:09,507
Let me just finish
this chapter.
305
00:15:12,911 --> 00:15:14,645
Ahh.
306
00:15:14,679 --> 00:15:17,648
Brilliant!
307
00:15:17,682 --> 00:15:18,915
Sir, anyone who says
308
00:15:18,950 --> 00:15:22,519
"the hunt for red October"
can't be improved upon
309
00:15:22,553 --> 00:15:25,755
hasn't heard, uh...
Rosie Perez... Read it.
310
00:15:25,790 --> 00:15:28,925
Hey, you'll never guess
who we ran into in the lobby...
311
00:15:28,960 --> 00:15:30,760
alfonse d'amato!
312
00:15:30,795 --> 00:15:32,096
Hey, big Al!
313
00:15:32,130 --> 00:15:34,098
Randy, how you doing?
314
00:15:34,132 --> 00:15:36,733
We asked Al to tell you how much
fun he had being a senator.
315
00:15:36,767 --> 00:15:39,436
I thought you wanted me to
tell him how much fun I've had
316
00:15:39,471 --> 00:15:41,171
since I've stoppedbeing senator.
317
00:15:41,206 --> 00:15:43,307
I play poker all the time,
318
00:15:43,341 --> 00:15:45,575
I'm happier than ever,
I'm richer than ever.
319
00:15:45,610 --> 00:15:46,977
It's fantastic!
320
00:15:47,012 --> 00:15:49,746
Tell me being senator
wasn't even better.
321
00:15:49,780 --> 00:15:51,215
Well, it was different.
322
00:15:51,249 --> 00:15:54,518
Now when people wave to me,
they use all five fingers.
323
00:15:54,552 --> 00:15:57,587
Okay, Al, we'll let you
get back to your poker game.
324
00:15:57,622 --> 00:15:59,490
Well,
I'd like to tell you...
325
00:15:59,524 --> 00:16:01,191
the one thing
that kept me going
326
00:16:01,226 --> 00:16:03,894
was the outside chance that
I might make a tiny difference.
327
00:16:03,928 --> 00:16:05,629
Sorry
you had to hear that, sir.
328
00:16:05,663 --> 00:16:08,499
You know, Mike, I'd
like to make a tiny difference!
329
00:16:08,533 --> 00:16:10,067
Y-you would?
330
00:16:10,101 --> 00:16:13,870
Yeah. It's something
I've just been mulling over.
331
00:16:13,905 --> 00:16:16,106
T-tiny difference...
332
00:16:16,140 --> 00:16:17,774
I-I-I like it!
That's good!
333
00:16:17,808 --> 00:16:19,876
Go there! Explore!
334
00:16:19,910 --> 00:16:21,579
That's it!
I'm back in the race!
335
00:16:36,428 --> 00:16:38,995
Jeez, Stuart,
what happened to you?
336
00:16:39,030 --> 00:16:41,365
Remember that woman
I was seeing...
337
00:16:41,399 --> 00:16:43,667
the one
married to the bouncer?
338
00:16:43,701 --> 00:16:47,137
Last night, when I went home,
he was waiting for me.
339
00:16:47,172 --> 00:16:49,640
I have no idea
how he found out.
340
00:16:52,877 --> 00:16:56,747
[LAUGHING] Do you want
to know how he found out?
341
00:16:56,781 --> 00:17:00,317
[LAUGHS] We
told him!
342
00:17:00,351 --> 00:17:01,752
Gotcha!
343
00:17:01,754 --> 00:17:04,688
That's not a practical joke,
you idiots!
344
00:17:04,723 --> 00:17:07,858
I'm really hurt!
I may have a concussion!
345
00:17:07,892 --> 00:17:09,527
Yes! Score!
346
00:17:13,965 --> 00:17:16,534
And that's not all!
347
00:17:16,568 --> 00:17:19,970
We also called your mother!
348
00:17:20,005 --> 00:17:22,973
You told my mother I was
sleeping with a married woman?!
349
00:17:23,008 --> 00:17:26,209
We told her you were ÷ dead!
350
00:17:28,479 --> 00:17:30,614
You guys are crazy!
351
00:17:30,649 --> 00:17:32,783
I got to go see my mother!
352
00:17:32,817 --> 00:17:34,184
We rule!
353
00:17:34,218 --> 00:17:35,786
[LAUGHS]
354
00:17:35,820 --> 00:17:37,988
[DOG SNARLING]
355
00:17:38,023 --> 00:17:41,692
STUART: Hey! Down, boy!
I don't have any drugs on me!
356
00:17:41,726 --> 00:17:43,861
That's what you think!
357
00:17:46,531 --> 00:17:48,064
Carter. There you are.
358
00:17:48,099 --> 00:17:49,500
Oh, Nick.
359
00:17:49,534 --> 00:17:52,503
I think you should pretend
I'm a social problem
360
00:17:52,537 --> 00:17:54,104
and ignore me.
361
00:17:54,138 --> 00:17:56,340
Well, I can't ignore you,
Carter.
362
00:17:56,374 --> 00:17:58,909
That's why
first thing this morning...
363
00:17:58,943 --> 00:18:01,445
I donated $50 million
to charity.
364
00:18:01,479 --> 00:18:03,414
You gave away all your money
for me?!
365
00:18:03,448 --> 00:18:06,350
No, I gave away
$50 million.
366
00:18:06,384 --> 00:18:07,818
That means a lot to me.
367
00:18:11,255 --> 00:18:14,224
Can I have a car?
368
00:18:14,258 --> 00:18:16,126
So, Mr. mayor,
just to review...
369
00:18:16,160 --> 00:18:18,195
you'll make
the announcement alone,
370
00:18:18,229 --> 00:18:20,297
then you'll lead the press
out here,
371
00:18:20,332 --> 00:18:23,233
where you'll join Mike and I
for a reception with cake.
372
00:18:23,267 --> 00:18:24,635
Oh, before I go out there,
373
00:18:24,669 --> 00:18:27,170
I'd like to clear up
an important issue...
374
00:18:27,172 --> 00:18:30,407
devil's-food, sir...
with strawberry filling.
375
00:18:30,441 --> 00:18:33,443
No, I was going to ask you
about my gun-control policy.
376
00:18:34,913 --> 00:18:36,246
Just kidding.
Delicious!
377
00:18:39,083 --> 00:18:40,784
Mike!
378
00:18:40,786 --> 00:18:42,252
I'm going to need
a few sick days.
379
00:18:42,286 --> 00:18:43,988
I just came down
with a case of...
380
00:18:44,055 --> 00:18:46,524
I'm going to Paris
with Nick!
381
00:18:46,558 --> 00:18:47,725
Congratulations.
382
00:18:47,759 --> 00:18:51,127
Guess it's just the week
for unlikely couples.
383
00:18:51,162 --> 00:18:52,362
What's that
supposed to mean?
384
00:18:52,531 --> 00:18:54,665
Please... like somebody
and somebod y
385
00:18:54,699 --> 00:18:57,668
didn't go to great lengths
to stay near each other.
386
00:18:57,702 --> 00:18:59,436
Oh, well... au revoir!
387
00:18:59,470 --> 00:19:01,138
Well...
388
00:19:01,172 --> 00:19:03,774
That's the most ridiculous
thing I've ever heard.
389
00:19:03,808 --> 00:19:05,743
And I've walked in
on Paul singing
390
00:19:05,777 --> 00:19:07,711
"don't cry for me,
Argentina."
391
00:19:07,746 --> 00:19:10,247
All I care about is keeping
the mayor in the Senate Race.
392
00:19:10,282 --> 00:19:12,783
Working with you is like
an occupational hazard.
393
00:19:12,817 --> 00:19:14,117
If it's
an occupational hazard,
394
00:19:14,151 --> 00:19:16,019
why don't you stop
riding my coattails?
395
00:19:16,053 --> 00:19:18,288
Oh, I'm riding your
coattails,
396
00:19:18,323 --> 00:19:20,390
Mr. "don't leave!
I need you!"
397
00:19:20,425 --> 00:19:21,926
I was in the box!
398
00:19:21,960 --> 00:19:23,727
That's just unfair.
399
00:19:23,762 --> 00:19:25,796
You know, you are such...
400
00:19:25,830 --> 00:19:28,732
ooh! Can't insult me!
I'm in the box!
401
00:19:28,767 --> 00:19:30,934
You're coming out of the box
right now!
402
00:19:30,968 --> 00:19:32,169
[GASPS]
403
00:19:33,571 --> 00:19:36,039
...who work harmoniously
together
404
00:19:36,073 --> 00:19:38,842
in pursuit
of an almost-sacred goal...
405
00:19:38,876 --> 00:19:41,378
MIKE:
Hey, you ripped my shirt!
406
00:19:42,647 --> 00:19:44,047
Wait, wait, wait, Mike!
407
00:19:44,082 --> 00:19:47,718
This is the mayor's big day!
We'll ruin everything!
408
00:19:47,752 --> 00:19:49,386
All right.
You're right.
409
00:19:49,420 --> 00:19:51,655
You're right.
I just, uh...
410
00:19:51,690 --> 00:19:54,058
I lost my head
for a second.
411
00:19:54,092 --> 00:19:55,358
Hyah!
412
00:20:02,934 --> 00:20:04,001
Oh, my God!
413
00:20:04,035 --> 00:20:06,770
Oh, my God,
what have I done?!
414
00:20:12,310 --> 00:20:13,677
It's okay.
415
00:20:13,712 --> 00:20:15,746
It's all right.
416
00:20:19,284 --> 00:20:21,017
We just lost control.
417
00:20:21,051 --> 00:20:25,322
I'm gonna teach you a little
something about class...
418
00:20:25,356 --> 00:20:26,623
About dignity.
419
00:20:26,657 --> 00:20:28,158
Oh, who am I kidding?
420
00:20:30,362 --> 00:20:33,630
Now I'd like you all to meet
the brains behind my campaign
421
00:20:33,664 --> 00:20:35,565
and have some cake.
422
00:20:35,600 --> 00:20:36,566
Hi.
423
00:20:36,601 --> 00:20:38,601
Mike Flaherty.
424
00:20:38,636 --> 00:20:40,737
Caitlin Moore.
425
00:20:47,278 --> 00:20:48,611
So...
426
00:20:48,646 --> 00:20:50,447
Doritos.
427
00:20:50,482 --> 00:20:52,316
Oh, yeah.
I've got everything.
428
00:20:52,350 --> 00:20:53,750
I've got stacks of snacks.
429
00:20:53,784 --> 00:20:55,318
[LAUGHING]
Stacks of snacks!
430
00:20:55,353 --> 00:20:57,620
[LAUGHING]
That's really...
431
00:20:58,989 --> 00:21:01,792
there's something
I've always wondered
432
00:21:01,826 --> 00:21:03,126
about
the vending industry...
433
00:21:03,160 --> 00:21:04,294
are you single?
434
00:21:04,362 --> 00:21:06,930
Yes.
435
00:21:06,964 --> 00:21:09,333
Hey, Bruce!
436
00:21:09,367 --> 00:21:12,602
And there
it is!
437
00:21:12,636 --> 00:21:13,770
There what is?
438
00:21:15,639 --> 00:21:18,342
MAN: Sit, ubu, sit.
Good dog.
439
00:21:18,376 --> 00:21:19,242
(BARKING)30846
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof