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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:12,922 --> 00:00:15,357 . >>> GOOD AFTERNOON, I'M DANA BASH, AND WELCOME TO INSIDE 2 00:00:15,359 --> 00:00:16,158 >>> GOOD AFTERNOON, I'M DANA BASH, AND WELCOME TO INSIDE POLITICS. 3 00:00:16,160 --> 00:00:19,528 BASH, AND WELCOME TO INSIDE POLITICS. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 4 00:00:19,530 --> 00:00:21,797 POLITICS. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] COMING UP, WE'LL GIVE WOLF 5 00:00:21,799 --> 00:00:23,532 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] COMING UP, WE'LL GIVE WOLF BLITZER AN EDIBLE AND AN HOUR TO 6 00:00:23,534 --> 00:00:25,000 COMING UP, WE'LL GIVE WOLF BLITZER AN EDIBLE AND AN HOUR TO SOLVE THE MIDDLE EAST. 7 00:00:25,002 --> 00:00:28,036 BLITZER AN EDIBLE AND AN HOUR TO SOLVE THE MIDDLE EAST. BUT FIRST, ON TUESDAY, PRESIDENT 8 00:00:28,038 --> 00:00:29,638 SOLVE THE MIDDLE EAST. BUT FIRST, ON TUESDAY, PRESIDENT JOE BIDEN WON THE WISH PRIMARY, 9 00:00:29,640 --> 00:00:31,606 BUT FIRST, ON TUESDAY, PRESIDENT JOE BIDEN WON THE WISH PRIMARY, BUT A NEW YORK TIMES POLL HAS 10 00:00:31,608 --> 00:00:33,575 JOE BIDEN WON THE WISH PRIMARY, BUT A NEW YORK TIMES POLL HAS HIM DOWN FIVE POINTS, AND MANY 11 00:00:33,577 --> 00:00:34,810 BUT A NEW YORK TIMES POLL HAS HIM DOWN FIVE POINTS, AND MANY VOTERS STILL HAVE CONCERNS ABOUT 12 00:00:34,812 --> 00:00:35,410 HIM DOWN FIVE POINTS, AND MANY VOTERS STILL HAVE CONCERNS ABOUT HIS AGE. 13 00:00:35,412 --> 00:00:37,946 VOTERS STILL HAVE CONCERNS ABOUT HIS AGE. HERE WITH ME IS GOVERNOR OF 14 00:00:37,948 --> 00:00:41,316 HIS AGE. HERE WITH ME IS GOVERNOR OF CALIFORNIA AND BIDEN ADVOCATE, 15 00:00:41,318 --> 00:00:42,017 HERE WITH ME IS GOVERNOR OF CALIFORNIA AND BIDEN ADVOCATE, GAVIN NEWSOM. 16 00:00:42,019 --> 00:00:43,752 CALIFORNIA AND BIDEN ADVOCATE, GAVIN NEWSOM. >> GREAT TO BE WITH YOU, DANA. 17 00:00:43,754 --> 00:00:44,920 GAVIN NEWSOM. >> GREAT TO BE WITH YOU, DANA. I UNDERSTAND PEOPLE CARE ABOUT 18 00:00:44,922 --> 00:00:46,421 >> GREAT TO BE WITH YOU, DANA. I UNDERSTAND PEOPLE CARE ABOUT THE PRESIDENT'S AGE, BUT THEY 19 00:00:46,423 --> 00:00:47,923 I UNDERSTAND PEOPLE CARE ABOUT THE PRESIDENT'S AGE, BUT THEY SHOULD CARE ABOUT HIS RECORD. 20 00:00:47,925 --> 00:00:50,292 THE PRESIDENT'S AGE, BUT THEY SHOULD CARE ABOUT HIS RECORD. HE'S CREATED MORE JOBS THAN ANY 21 00:00:50,294 --> 00:00:52,861 SHOULD CARE ABOUT HIS RECORD. HE'S CREATED MORE JOBS THAN ANY PRESIDENT IN HISTORY, INFLATION 22 00:00:52,863 --> 00:00:55,230 HE'S CREATED MORE JOBS THAN ANY PRESIDENT IN HISTORY, INFLATION IS DOWN, THE SHAMROCK SHAKE IS 23 00:00:55,232 --> 00:00:57,833 PRESIDENT IN HISTORY, INFLATION IS DOWN, THE SHAMROCK SHAKE IS BACK, AND BEYONCE HAS GONE 24 00:00:57,835 --> 00:00:58,166 IS DOWN, THE SHAMROCK SHAKE IS BACK, AND BEYONCE HAS GONE COUNTRY. 25 00:00:58,168 --> 00:00:58,700 BACK, AND BEYONCE HAS GONE COUNTRY. THANK YOU, JOE. 26 00:00:58,702 --> 00:00:59,301 COUNTRY. THANK YOU, JOE. >> RIGHT. 27 00:00:59,303 --> 00:01:01,336 THANK YOU, JOE. >> RIGHT. BUT CAN HE MAKE THAT CASE WITH 28 00:01:01,338 --> 00:01:03,505 >> RIGHT. BUT CAN HE MAKE THAT CASE WITH THE SPEED AND SHARPNESS THAT 29 00:01:03,507 --> 00:01:04,606 BUT CAN HE MAKE THAT CASE WITH THE SPEED AND SHARPNESS THAT SOMEONE LIKE YOU CAN? 30 00:01:04,608 --> 00:01:06,541 THE SPEED AND SHARPNESS THAT SOMEONE LIKE YOU CAN? >> JOE CAN DO IT BETTER. 31 00:01:06,543 --> 00:01:08,877 SOMEONE LIKE YOU CAN? >> JOE CAN DO IT BETTER. BEHIND CLOSED DOORS, JOE IS 32 00:01:08,879 --> 00:01:09,277 >> JOE CAN DO IT BETTER. BEHIND CLOSED DOORS, JOE IS INCREDIBLE. 33 00:01:09,279 --> 00:01:10,378 BEHIND CLOSED DOORS, JOE IS INCREDIBLE. YESTERDAY WE HAD A BIG MEETING 34 00:01:10,380 --> 00:01:12,314 INCREDIBLE. YESTERDAY WE HAD A BIG MEETING ABOUT THE BORDER, AND HE HAD 35 00:01:12,316 --> 00:01:13,081 YESTERDAY WE HAD A BIG MEETING ABOUT THE BORDER, AND HE HAD SUCH COMMAND. 36 00:01:13,083 --> 00:01:15,484 ABOUT THE BORDER, AND HE HAD SUCH COMMAND. HE HAD CHARTS, TABLES, POWER 37 00:01:15,486 --> 00:01:17,986 SUCH COMMAND. HE HAD CHARTS, TABLES, POWER POINTS, HE HAD AN INTERACTIVE AR 38 00:01:17,988 --> 00:01:20,055 HE HAD CHARTS, TABLES, POWER POINTS, HE HAD AN INTERACTIVE AR DISPLAY ON THE APPLE VISION PRO 39 00:01:20,057 --> 00:01:22,190 POINTS, HE HAD AN INTERACTIVE AR DISPLAY ON THE APPLE VISION PRO THAT HE PROGRAMMED HIMSELF. 40 00:01:22,192 --> 00:01:27,062 DISPLAY ON THE APPLE VISION PRO THAT HE PROGRAMMED HIMSELF. THE SOFTWARE MIGHT BE IN BETA, 41 00:01:27,064 --> 00:01:28,730 THAT HE PROGRAMMED HIMSELF. THE SOFTWARE MIGHT BE IN BETA, BUT THE MAN IS AN ALPHA. 42 00:01:28,732 --> 00:01:30,265 THE SOFTWARE MIGHT BE IN BETA, BUT THE MAN IS AN ALPHA. >> I'M A LITTLE SKEPTICAL THIS 43 00:01:30,267 --> 00:01:32,868 BUT THE MAN IS AN ALPHA. >> I'M A LITTLE SKEPTICAL THIS IS THE SAME MAN PEOPLE CALL 44 00:01:32,870 --> 00:01:33,301 >> I'M A LITTLE SKEPTICAL THIS IS THE SAME MAN PEOPLE CALL SLEEPY JOE. 45 00:01:33,303 --> 00:01:36,638 IS THE SAME MAN PEOPLE CALL SLEEPY JOE. >> WELL, HE HAS TO SLEEP, DANA. 46 00:01:36,640 --> 00:01:39,574 SLEEPY JOE. >> WELL, HE HAS TO SLEEP, DANA. EVEN WHEN HE'S SLEEPING, HE'S 47 00:01:39,576 --> 00:01:39,841 >> WELL, HE HAS TO SLEEP, DANA. EVEN WHEN HE'S SLEEPING, HE'S ON. 48 00:01:39,843 --> 00:01:44,513 EVEN WHEN HE'S SLEEPING, HE'S ON. THE OTHER DAY, HE WAS TAKING A 49 00:01:44,515 --> 00:01:46,648 ON. THE OTHER DAY, HE WAS TAKING A NAP, AND I WHIPPED A BASEBALL AT 50 00:01:46,650 --> 00:01:48,850 THE OTHER DAY, HE WAS TAKING A NAP, AND I WHIPPED A BASEBALL AT HIM AND HE CAUGHT IT LIGHTNING 51 00:01:48,852 --> 00:01:49,184 NAP, AND I WHIPPED A BASEBALL AT HIM AND HE CAUGHT IT LIGHTNING QUICK. 52 00:01:49,186 --> 00:01:52,120 HIM AND HE CAUGHT IT LIGHTNING QUICK. >> LET'S GO LIVE TO WASHINGTON 53 00:01:52,122 --> 00:01:59,995 QUICK. >> LET'S GO LIVE TO WASHINGTON WITH KARINE JEAN-PIERRE. 54 00:01:59,997 --> 00:02:00,362 >> LET'S GO LIVE TO WASHINGTON WITH KARINE JEAN-PIERRE. >> HELLO. 55 00:02:00,364 --> 00:02:01,096 WITH KARINE JEAN-PIERRE. >> HELLO. PLEASURE TO BE WITH YOU TO TALK 56 00:02:01,098 --> 00:02:01,863 >> HELLO. PLEASURE TO BE WITH YOU TO TALK ABOUT THE MOST VIGOROUS MAN I'VE 57 00:02:01,865 --> 00:02:03,431 PLEASURE TO BE WITH YOU TO TALK ABOUT THE MOST VIGOROUS MAN I'VE EVER KNOWN, JOE BIDEN. 58 00:02:03,433 --> 00:02:05,800 ABOUT THE MOST VIGOROUS MAN I'VE EVER KNOWN, JOE BIDEN. I WAS JUST WITH HIM, AND BEHIND 59 00:02:05,802 --> 00:02:08,036 EVER KNOWN, JOE BIDEN. I WAS JUST WITH HIM, AND BEHIND CLOSED DOORS, HE'S A WHIRLWIND. 60 00:02:08,038 --> 00:02:09,070 I WAS JUST WITH HIM, AND BEHIND CLOSED DOORS, HE'S A WHIRLWIND. LOOK AT HIS SCHEDULE. 61 00:02:09,072 --> 00:02:10,906 CLOSED DOORS, HE'S A WHIRLWIND. LOOK AT HIS SCHEDULE. 7:00 A.M., SOUL CYCLE CLASS, AND 62 00:02:10,908 --> 00:02:14,176 LOOK AT HIS SCHEDULE. 7:00 A.M., SOUL CYCLE CLASS, AND HE LEADS IT. 63 00:02:14,178 --> 00:02:15,610 7:00 A.M., SOUL CYCLE CLASS, AND HE LEADS IT. 8:30 A.M., PLAY SPEED CHESS IN 64 00:02:15,612 --> 00:02:17,312 HE LEADS IT. 8:30 A.M., PLAY SPEED CHESS IN THE PARK. 65 00:02:17,314 --> 00:02:19,915 8:30 A.M., PLAY SPEED CHESS IN THE PARK. 8:32 A.M., WINS CHESS GAME, 66 00:02:19,917 --> 00:02:21,683 THE PARK. 8:32 A.M., WINS CHESS GAME, POINTS AT OPPONENT AND SAYS, 67 00:02:21,685 --> 00:02:24,052 8:32 A.M., WINS CHESS GAME, POINTS AT OPPONENT AND SAYS, NEXT TIME YOUNG BLOOD. 68 00:02:24,054 --> 00:02:27,155 POINTS AT OPPONENT AND SAYS, NEXT TIME YOUNG BLOOD. 9:30 A.M., MEET WITH JOINT 69 00:02:27,157 --> 00:02:29,357 NEXT TIME YOUNG BLOOD. 9:30 A.M., MEET WITH JOINT CHIEFS FOR A MILITARY STRATEGY 70 00:02:29,359 --> 00:02:31,326 9:30 A.M., MEET WITH JOINT CHIEFS FOR A MILITARY STRATEGY NEATING AND PUSHUP CONTEST. 71 00:02:31,328 --> 00:02:33,895 CHIEFS FOR A MILITARY STRATEGY NEATING AND PUSHUP CONTEST. WINS CONTEST, POINTS AT THE HEAD 72 00:02:33,897 --> 00:02:35,397 NEATING AND PUSHUP CONTEST. WINS CONTEST, POINTS AT THE HEAD OF THE JOINT CHIEFS AND SAYS, 73 00:02:35,399 --> 00:02:37,299 WINS CONTEST, POINTS AT THE HEAD OF THE JOINT CHIEFS AND SAYS, NEXT TIME YOUNG BLOOD. 74 00:02:37,301 --> 00:02:38,266 OF THE JOINT CHIEFS AND SAYS, NEXT TIME YOUNG BLOOD. THEN, TRAIN TIME. 75 00:02:38,268 --> 00:02:40,135 NEXT TIME YOUNG BLOOD. THEN, TRAIN TIME. THAT'S ALL BEFORE A LUNCH WHERE 76 00:02:40,137 --> 00:02:42,404 THEN, TRAIN TIME. THAT'S ALL BEFORE A LUNCH WHERE HE EATS FIVE WHOLE CHICKENS AND 77 00:02:42,406 --> 00:02:43,505 THAT'S ALL BEFORE A LUNCH WHERE HE EATS FIVE WHOLE CHICKENS AND A RAW POTATO. 78 00:02:43,507 --> 00:02:45,674 HE EATS FIVE WHOLE CHICKENS AND A RAW POTATO. >> BIDEN IS 81 YEARS OLD. 79 00:02:45,676 --> 00:02:47,409 A RAW POTATO. >> BIDEN IS 81 YEARS OLD. ISN'T THAT A LITTLE CONCERNING? 80 00:02:47,411 --> 00:02:49,511 >> BIDEN IS 81 YEARS OLD. ISN'T THAT A LITTLE CONCERNING? >> ONLY IF YOU'RE SCARED OF 81 00:02:49,513 --> 00:02:50,845 ISN'T THAT A LITTLE CONCERNING? >> ONLY IF YOU'RE SCARED OF WISDOM. 82 00:02:50,847 --> 00:02:53,181 >> ONLY IF YOU'RE SCARED OF WISDOM. JOE BIDEN WAS 34 YEARS OLD 83 00:02:53,183 --> 00:02:54,683 WISDOM. JOE BIDEN WAS 34 YEARS OLD BEFORE ROE VERSUS WADE WAS 84 00:02:54,685 --> 00:02:56,418 JOE BIDEN WAS 34 YEARS OLD BEFORE ROE VERSUS WADE WAS STATED, SO YOU KNOW HE WAS 85 00:02:56,420 --> 00:02:58,220 BEFORE ROE VERSUS WADE WAS STATED, SO YOU KNOW HE WAS SMASHING. 86 00:02:58,222 --> 00:02:59,454 STATED, SO YOU KNOW HE WAS SMASHING. HE DEALT WITH THOSE RESTRICTIONS 87 00:02:59,456 --> 00:03:01,590 SMASHING. HE DEALT WITH THOSE RESTRICTIONS THEN AS A YOUNG HANDSOME MAN, 88 00:03:01,592 --> 00:03:03,425 HE DEALT WITH THOSE RESTRICTIONS THEN AS A YOUNG HANDSOME MAN, AND HE CAN DEAL WITH THEM NOW AS 89 00:03:03,427 --> 00:03:05,594 THEN AS A YOUNG HANDSOME MAN, AND HE CAN DEAL WITH THEM NOW AS AN OLD EVEN MORE HANDSOME MAN. 90 00:03:05,596 --> 00:03:08,563 AND HE CAN DEAL WITH THEM NOW AS AN OLD EVEN MORE HANDSOME MAN. ASK ANYONE WHO WORKS WITH HIM 91 00:03:08,565 --> 00:03:08,930 AN OLD EVEN MORE HANDSOME MAN. ASK ANYONE WHO WORKS WITH HIM CLOSELY. 92 00:03:08,932 --> 00:03:11,566 ASK ANYONE WHO WORKS WITH HIM CLOSELY. >> WE ARE NOW JOINED BY 93 00:03:11,568 --> 00:03:13,201 CLOSELY. >> WE ARE NOW JOINED BY ALEJANDRO MAYORKAS. 94 00:03:13,203 --> 00:03:14,703 >> WE ARE NOW JOINED BY ALEJANDRO MAYORKAS. >> THANK YOU FOR HAVING ME. 95 00:03:14,705 --> 00:03:15,971 ALEJANDRO MAYORKAS. >> THANK YOU FOR HAVING ME. I'M EXHAUSTED. 96 00:03:15,973 --> 00:03:17,405 >> THANK YOU FOR HAVING ME. I'M EXHAUSTED. I WAS WITH JOE BIDEN FOR THE 97 00:03:17,407 --> 00:03:19,274 I'M EXHAUSTED. I WAS WITH JOE BIDEN FOR THE PAST WEEKEND, AND HE WIPED ME 98 00:03:19,276 --> 00:03:19,574 I WAS WITH JOE BIDEN FOR THE PAST WEEKEND, AND HE WIPED ME OUT. 99 00:03:19,576 --> 00:03:21,276 PAST WEEKEND, AND HE WIPED ME OUT. >> SO YOU FEEL HE'S UP TO THE 100 00:03:21,278 --> 00:03:21,543 OUT. >> SO YOU FEEL HE'S UP TO THE JOB? 101 00:03:21,545 --> 00:03:24,646 >> SO YOU FEEL HE'S UP TO THE JOB? >> DANA, I WAS JUST WITH HIM, 102 00:03:24,648 --> 00:03:26,748 JOB? >> DANA, I WAS JUST WITH HIM, AND BEHIND CLOSED DOORS, HE'S A 103 00:03:26,750 --> 00:03:27,082 >> DANA, I WAS JUST WITH HIM, AND BEHIND CLOSED DOORS, HE'S A DYNAMO. 104 00:03:27,084 --> 00:03:32,854 AND BEHIND CLOSED DOORS, HE'S A DYNAMO. THIS WEEKEND, WE WENT DOWN TO 105 00:03:32,856 --> 00:03:33,588 DYNAMO. THIS WEEKEND, WE WENT DOWN TO THE BORDER TOWN OF BROWNSVILLE, 106 00:03:33,590 --> 00:03:34,289 THIS WEEKEND, WE WENT DOWN TO THE BORDER TOWN OF BROWNSVILLE, TEXAS, AND JOE WENT TO BEAST 107 00:03:34,291 --> 00:03:34,589 THE BORDER TOWN OF BROWNSVILLE, TEXAS, AND JOE WENT TO BEAST MODE. 108 00:03:34,591 --> 00:03:36,891 TEXAS, AND JOE WENT TO BEAST MODE. HE SAID, WE GOT TO TIGHTEN THIS 109 00:03:36,893 --> 00:03:38,293 MODE. HE SAID, WE GOT TO TIGHTEN THIS BORDER, THEN HE WENT UP TO THE 110 00:03:38,295 --> 00:03:40,762 HE SAID, WE GOT TO TIGHTEN THIS BORDER, THEN HE WENT UP TO THE TOP OF THE BORDER WALL, FRONT 111 00:03:40,764 --> 00:03:42,631 BORDER, THEN HE WENT UP TO THE TOP OF THE BORDER WALL, FRONT FLIPPED INTO THE RIO GRAND AND 112 00:03:42,633 --> 00:03:45,033 TOP OF THE BORDER WALL, FRONT FLIPPED INTO THE RIO GRAND AND CAME BACK UP WITH A FISH IN HIS 113 00:03:45,035 --> 00:03:45,400 FLIPPED INTO THE RIO GRAND AND CAME BACK UP WITH A FISH IN HIS MOUTH. 114 00:03:45,402 --> 00:03:48,103 CAME BACK UP WITH A FISH IN HIS MOUTH. BUT YOU DIDN'T REPORT THAT 115 00:03:48,105 --> 00:03:49,271 MOUTH. BUT YOU DIDN'T REPORT THAT BECAUSE IT DOESN'T FIT YOUR 116 00:03:49,273 --> 00:03:49,671 BUT YOU DIDN'T REPORT THAT BECAUSE IT DOESN'T FIT YOUR NARRATIVE. 117 00:03:49,673 --> 00:03:51,106 BECAUSE IT DOESN'T FIT YOUR NARRATIVE. >> WITH ALL DUE RESPECT, IT 118 00:03:51,108 --> 00:03:52,274 NARRATIVE. >> WITH ALL DUE RESPECT, IT DOESN'T FIT REALITY. 119 00:03:52,276 --> 00:03:52,907 >> WITH ALL DUE RESPECT, IT DOESN'T FIT REALITY. >> PLEASE. 120 00:03:52,909 --> 00:03:54,609 DOESN'T FIT REALITY. >> PLEASE. WE WERE ALL JUST WITH HIM. 121 00:03:54,611 --> 00:03:56,411 >> PLEASE. WE WERE ALL JUST WITH HIM. IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE US, ASK ONE 122 00:03:56,413 --> 00:03:59,981 WE WERE ALL JUST WITH HIM. IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE US, ASK ONE OF THE NBA'S FIERCEST PLAYERS, 123 00:03:59,983 --> 00:04:00,482 IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE US, ASK ONE OF THE NBA'S FIERCEST PLAYERS, DRAYMOND GREEN. 124 00:04:00,484 --> 00:04:02,150 OF THE NBA'S FIERCEST PLAYERS, DRAYMOND GREEN. >> LET'S GO LIVE TO SAN 125 00:04:02,152 --> 00:04:03,752 DRAYMOND GREEN. >> LET'S GO LIVE TO SAN FRANCISCO. 126 00:04:03,754 --> 00:04:04,286 >> LET'S GO LIVE TO SAN FRANCISCO. HELLO, MR. GREEN. 127 00:04:04,288 --> 00:04:05,954 FRANCISCO. HELLO, MR. GREEN. >> WHAT'S UP, DANA. 128 00:04:05,956 --> 00:04:09,291 HELLO, MR. GREEN. >> WHAT'S UP, DANA. WE TALKING ABOUT JOE BIDEN? 129 00:04:09,293 --> 00:04:12,427 >> WHAT'S UP, DANA. WE TALKING ABOUT JOE BIDEN? BECAUSE HE GOT THAT DOG IN HIM. 130 00:04:12,429 --> 00:04:14,796 WE TALKING ABOUT JOE BIDEN? BECAUSE HE GOT THAT DOG IN HIM. >> YOU MET THE PRESIDENT? 131 00:04:14,798 --> 00:04:17,265 BECAUSE HE GOT THAT DOG IN HIM. >> YOU MET THE PRESIDENT? >> BEHIND CLOSED DOORS, HE IS 132 00:04:17,267 --> 00:04:17,632 >> YOU MET THE PRESIDENT? >> BEHIND CLOSED DOORS, HE IS STRONG. 133 00:04:17,634 --> 00:04:19,267 >> BEHIND CLOSED DOORS, HE IS STRONG. THAT MAN CAN JUMP SO HIGH THAT I 134 00:04:19,269 --> 00:04:22,404 STRONG. THAT MAN CAN JUMP SO HIGH THAT I SAW HIM GRAB A DOLLAR OFF THE 135 00:04:22,406 --> 00:04:24,039 THAT MAN CAN JUMP SO HIGH THAT I SAW HIM GRAB A DOLLAR OFF THE BACK OF A BACK BOARD AND LEAVE 136 00:04:24,041 --> 00:04:24,673 SAW HIM GRAB A DOLLAR OFF THE BACK OF A BACK BOARD AND LEAVE SOME CHANGE. 137 00:04:24,675 --> 00:04:26,708 BACK OF A BACK BOARD AND LEAVE SOME CHANGE. DID YOU KNOW HE DUNKED ON ME? 138 00:04:26,710 --> 00:04:28,109 SOME CHANGE. DID YOU KNOW HE DUNKED ON ME? >> HE DUNKED ON YOU? 139 00:04:28,111 --> 00:04:30,278 DID YOU KNOW HE DUNKED ON ME? >> HE DUNKED ON YOU? >> YEAH, IT WAS DISRESPECTFUL 140 00:04:30,280 --> 00:04:30,545 >> HE DUNKED ON YOU? >> YEAH, IT WAS DISRESPECTFUL TOO. 141 00:04:30,547 --> 00:04:32,280 >> YEAH, IT WAS DISRESPECTFUL TOO. HE WIND MILLED IN MY FACE 142 00:04:32,282 --> 00:04:33,815 TOO. HE WIND MILLED IN MY FACE TALKING ABOUT, YEAH, NEXT TIME 143 00:04:33,817 --> 00:04:34,516 HE WIND MILLED IN MY FACE TALKING ABOUT, YEAH, NEXT TIME YOUNG BLOOD. 144 00:04:34,518 --> 00:04:35,984 TALKING ABOUT, YEAH, NEXT TIME YOUNG BLOOD. I WASN'T HAVING IT SO I TRY 145 00:04:35,986 --> 00:04:37,519 YOUNG BLOOD. I WASN'T HAVING IT SO I TRY TODAY PUNCH HIM IN THE NUTS AND 146 00:04:37,521 --> 00:04:38,586 I WASN'T HAVING IT SO I TRY TODAY PUNCH HIM IN THE NUTS AND BROKE THREE FINGERS. 147 00:04:38,588 --> 00:04:40,255 TODAY PUNCH HIM IN THE NUTS AND BROKE THREE FINGERS. YOU CAN'T MESS WITH JOE, MAN. 148 00:04:40,257 --> 00:04:41,990 BROKE THREE FINGERS. YOU CAN'T MESS WITH JOE, MAN. >> GOVERNOR, I HAVE TO SAY WE 149 00:04:41,992 --> 00:04:43,825 YOU CAN'T MESS WITH JOE, MAN. >> GOVERNOR, I HAVE TO SAY WE ALL KNOW THE STAKES HERE, YOU 150 00:04:43,827 --> 00:04:46,294 >> GOVERNOR, I HAVE TO SAY WE ALL KNOW THE STAKES HERE, YOU DON'T HAVE TO EXAGGERATE TO MAKE 151 00:04:46,296 --> 00:04:46,828 ALL KNOW THE STAKES HERE, YOU DON'T HAVE TO EXAGGERATE TO MAKE VOTERS FEEL BETTER. 152 00:04:46,830 --> 00:04:47,662 DON'T HAVE TO EXAGGERATE TO MAKE VOTERS FEEL BETTER. >> I'M NOT. 153 00:04:47,664 --> 00:04:48,930 VOTERS FEEL BETTER. >> I'M NOT. WHAT WE ARE SAYING ABOUT BIDEN 154 00:04:48,932 --> 00:04:49,497 >> I'M NOT. WHAT WE ARE SAYING ABOUT BIDEN IS TRUE. 155 00:04:49,499 --> 00:04:51,966 WHAT WE ARE SAYING ABOUT BIDEN IS TRUE. YOU WANT TO CALL HIM? 156 00:04:51,968 --> 00:04:53,868 IS TRUE. YOU WANT TO CALL HIM? LET'S FACE TIME HIM. 157 00:04:53,870 --> 00:04:55,570 YOU WANT TO CALL HIM? LET'S FACE TIME HIM. I'LL BET HE'S PROBABLY IN THE 158 00:04:55,572 --> 00:04:57,706 LET'S FACE TIME HIM. I'LL BET HE'S PROBABLY IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIKE RIDE. 159 00:04:57,708 --> 00:05:00,442 I'LL BET HE'S PROBABLY IN THE MIDDLE OF A BIKE RIDE. CAN YOU PUT MY PHONE UP ON THE 160 00:05:00,444 --> 00:05:01,109 MIDDLE OF A BIKE RIDE. CAN YOU PUT MY PHONE UP ON THE SCREEN? 161 00:05:01,111 --> 00:05:02,844 CAN YOU PUT MY PHONE UP ON THE SCREEN? >> HEY! 162 00:05:02,846 --> 00:05:04,612 SCREEN? >> HEY! HEY, ALL RIGHT! 163 00:05:04,614 --> 00:05:05,980 >> HEY! HEY, ALL RIGHT! IT'S GAVIN NEWSOM. 164 00:05:05,982 --> 00:05:07,682 HEY, ALL RIGHT! IT'S GAVIN NEWSOM. >> MR. PRESIDENT? 165 00:05:07,684 --> 00:05:08,950 IT'S GAVIN NEWSOM. >> MR. PRESIDENT? >> HOLD ON. 166 00:05:08,952 --> 00:05:11,286 >> MR. PRESIDENT? >> HOLD ON. I'M JUST GOING TO TURN UP THE 167 00:05:11,288 --> 00:05:11,619 >> HOLD ON. I'M JUST GOING TO TURN UP THE VOLUME. 168 00:05:11,621 --> 00:05:12,420 I'M JUST GOING TO TURN UP THE VOLUME. JUST GOT TO FIND THE BUTTON. 169 00:05:12,422 --> 00:05:15,557 VOLUME. JUST GOT TO FIND THE BUTTON. THERE WE -- 170 00:05:15,559 --> 00:05:18,259 JUST GOT TO FIND THE BUTTON. THERE WE -- >> WELL, LOOKS LIKE HE HUNG UP. 171 00:05:18,261 --> 00:05:21,162 THERE WE -- >> WELL, LOOKS LIKE HE HUNG UP. >> WHILE THE GOVERNOR TRIES TO 172 00:05:21,164 --> 00:05:21,930 >> WELL, LOOKS LIKE HE HUNG UP. >> WHILE THE GOVERNOR TRIES TO GET HIM BACK ON THE LINE, LET'S 173 00:05:21,932 --> 00:05:22,997 >> WHILE THE GOVERNOR TRIES TO GET HIM BACK ON THE LINE, LET'S TAKE A BREAK, AND LIVE FROM NEW 174 00:05:22,999 --> 00:05:29,037 GET HIM BACK ON THE LINE, LET'S TAKE A BREAK, AND LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S SATURDAY NIGHT! 175 00:05:29,039 --> 00:05:29,771 TAKE A BREAK, AND LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S SATURDAY NIGHT! >> Announcer: IT'S "SATURDAY 176 00:05:29,773 --> 00:05:31,206 YORK, IT'S SATURDAY NIGHT! >> Announcer: IT'S "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE" WITH -- 177 00:06:45,815 --> 00:06:48,016 FEATURING -- 178 00:07:14,143 --> 00:07:18,546 A FILM BY -- PLEASE DON'T DESTROY. MUSICAL GUEST -- KACEY 179 00:07:18,548 --> 00:07:22,984 DESTROY. MUSICAL GUEST -- KACEY MUSGRAVES. 180 00:07:22,986 --> 00:07:31,526 MUSICAL GUEST -- KACEY MUSGRAVES. AND YOUR HOST -- SYDNEY SWEENEY. 181 00:07:31,528 --> 00:07:32,260 MUSGRAVES. AND YOUR HOST -- SYDNEY SWEENEY. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, SYDNEY 182 00:07:32,262 --> 00:07:36,831 AND YOUR HOST -- SYDNEY SWEENEY. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, SYDNEY SWEENEY! 183 00:07:36,833 --> 00:07:53,281 LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, SYDNEY SWEENEY! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 184 00:07:58,687 --> 00:08:03,358 >>> THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. I AM SO HAPPY TO BE HERE. 185 00:08:03,360 --> 00:08:04,392 YOU VERY MUCH. I AM SO HAPPY TO BE HERE. MY NAME IS SYDNEY SWEENEY. 186 00:08:04,394 --> 00:08:08,129 I AM SO HAPPY TO BE HERE. MY NAME IS SYDNEY SWEENEY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 187 00:08:08,131 --> 00:08:10,231 MY NAME IS SYDNEY SWEENEY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] YOU MIGHT HAVE SEEN ME IN ANYONE 188 00:08:10,233 --> 00:08:13,468 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] YOU MIGHT HAVE SEEN ME IN ANYONE BUT YOU OR EUPHORIA. 189 00:08:13,470 --> 00:08:17,005 YOU MIGHT HAVE SEEN ME IN ANYONE BUT YOU OR EUPHORIA. YOU DEFINITELY DID NOT SEE ME IN 190 00:08:17,007 --> 00:08:17,772 BUT YOU OR EUPHORIA. YOU DEFINITELY DID NOT SEE ME IN MADAM WEB. 191 00:08:17,774 --> 00:08:20,775 YOU DEFINITELY DID NOT SEE ME IN MADAM WEB. BUT I DO HAVE A NEW FILM COMING 192 00:08:20,777 --> 00:08:23,878 MADAM WEB. BUT I DO HAVE A NEW FILM COMING OUT CALLED IMMACULATE. 193 00:08:23,880 --> 00:08:27,015 BUT I DO HAVE A NEW FILM COMING OUT CALLED IMMACULATE. I PLAY A NUN, SO IT'S PERFECT 194 00:08:27,017 --> 00:08:27,382 OUT CALLED IMMACULATE. I PLAY A NUN, SO IT'S PERFECT CASTING. 195 00:08:27,384 --> 00:08:28,750 I PLAY A NUN, SO IT'S PERFECT CASTING. BUT TONIGHT, I'M EXCITED FOR 196 00:08:28,752 --> 00:08:31,519 CASTING. BUT TONIGHT, I'M EXCITED FOR EVERYONE TO GET TO KNOW THE REAL 197 00:08:31,521 --> 00:08:31,786 BUT TONIGHT, I'M EXCITED FOR EVERYONE TO GET TO KNOW THE REAL ME. 198 00:08:31,788 --> 00:08:32,787 EVERYONE TO GET TO KNOW THE REAL ME. I FEEL LIKE PEOPLE ONLY SEE ME 199 00:08:32,789 --> 00:08:34,656 ME. I FEEL LIKE PEOPLE ONLY SEE ME AS THE GIRL ON TV WHO SCREAMS, 200 00:08:34,658 --> 00:08:37,258 I FEEL LIKE PEOPLE ONLY SEE ME AS THE GIRL ON TV WHO SCREAMS, CRIES, AND HAS SEX. 201 00:08:37,260 --> 00:08:37,992 AS THE GIRL ON TV WHO SCREAMS, CRIES, AND HAS SEX. SOMETIMES IT'S ALL THREE AT THE 202 00:08:37,994 --> 00:08:40,662 CRIES, AND HAS SEX. SOMETIMES IT'S ALL THREE AT THE SAME TIME. 203 00:08:40,664 --> 00:08:42,897 SOMETIMES IT'S ALL THREE AT THE SAME TIME. BUT I'M MORE THAN THAT. 204 00:08:42,899 --> 00:08:45,567 SAME TIME. BUT I'M MORE THAN THAT. I'M FROM A TOWN CALLED SPOKANE 205 00:08:45,569 --> 00:08:46,801 BUT I'M MORE THAN THAT. I'M FROM A TOWN CALLED SPOKANE RIGHT ON THE BORDER OF 206 00:08:46,803 --> 00:08:47,735 I'M FROM A TOWN CALLED SPOKANE RIGHT ON THE BORDER OF WASHINGTON AND IDAHO. 207 00:08:47,737 --> 00:08:50,138 RIGHT ON THE BORDER OF WASHINGTON AND IDAHO. I FEEL A BOND TO BOTH STATES, 208 00:08:50,140 --> 00:08:51,806 WASHINGTON AND IDAHO. I FEEL A BOND TO BOTH STATES, LIKE WHEN PEOPLE ASK WHERE ARE 209 00:08:51,808 --> 00:08:54,676 I FEEL A BOND TO BOTH STATES, LIKE WHEN PEOPLE ASK WHERE ARE YOU FROM, I SAY WASHINGTON. 210 00:08:54,678 --> 00:08:55,810 LIKE WHEN PEOPLE ASK WHERE ARE YOU FROM, I SAY WASHINGTON. BUT WHEN PEOPLE ASK DID YOU GO 211 00:08:55,812 --> 00:08:57,845 YOU FROM, I SAY WASHINGTON. BUT WHEN PEOPLE ASK DID YOU GO TO A TRUMP-THEMED PARTY FOR YOUR 212 00:08:57,847 --> 00:09:01,282 BUT WHEN PEOPLE ASK DID YOU GO TO A TRUMP-THEMED PARTY FOR YOUR MOM, I SAY, IDAHO. 213 00:09:01,284 --> 00:09:02,717 TO A TRUMP-THEMED PARTY FOR YOUR MOM, I SAY, IDAHO. IT WAS ALWAYS MY DREAM TO BE AN 214 00:09:02,719 --> 00:09:03,084 MOM, I SAY, IDAHO. IT WAS ALWAYS MY DREAM TO BE AN ACTOR. 215 00:09:03,086 --> 00:09:05,553 IT WAS ALWAYS MY DREAM TO BE AN ACTOR. WHEN I WAS YOUNGER, MY PARENTS 216 00:09:05,555 --> 00:09:07,422 ACTOR. WHEN I WAS YOUNGER, MY PARENTS DROVE ME FROM SPOKANE TO LOS 217 00:09:07,424 --> 00:09:09,524 WHEN I WAS YOUNGER, MY PARENTS DROVE ME FROM SPOKANE TO LOS ANGELES JUST TO AUDITION. 218 00:09:09,526 --> 00:09:10,792 DROVE ME FROM SPOKANE TO LOS ANGELES JUST TO AUDITION. THAT'S A 19-HOUR DRIVE. 219 00:09:10,794 --> 00:09:14,062 ANGELES JUST TO AUDITION. THAT'S A 19-HOUR DRIVE. AND I'M SO GRATEFUL TO THEM FOR 220 00:09:14,064 --> 00:09:14,562 THAT'S A 19-HOUR DRIVE. AND I'M SO GRATEFUL TO THEM FOR BELIEVING IN ME. 221 00:09:14,564 --> 00:09:17,131 AND I'M SO GRATEFUL TO THEM FOR BELIEVING IN ME. AND I THINK THE REASON THEY DID 222 00:09:17,133 --> 00:09:19,834 BELIEVING IN ME. AND I THINK THE REASON THEY DID IS BECAUSE I PRESENTED THEM WITH 223 00:09:19,836 --> 00:09:21,002 AND I THINK THE REASON THEY DID IS BECAUSE I PRESENTED THEM WITH A FIVE-POINT PLAN TO BREAK INTO 224 00:09:21,004 --> 00:09:21,336 IS BECAUSE I PRESENTED THEM WITH A FIVE-POINT PLAN TO BREAK INTO ACTING. 225 00:09:21,338 --> 00:09:21,803 A FIVE-POINT PLAN TO BREAK INTO ACTING. I STILL HAVE IT. 226 00:09:21,805 --> 00:09:24,272 ACTING. I STILL HAVE IT. CHECK IT OUT. 227 00:09:24,274 --> 00:09:27,275 I STILL HAVE IT. CHECK IT OUT. IT SAYS, AUDITION, GET AN AGENT, 228 00:09:27,277 --> 00:09:30,044 CHECK IT OUT. IT SAYS, AUDITION, GET AN AGENT, DO COMMERCIALS AND SHORT FILMS, 229 00:09:30,046 --> 00:09:31,846 IT SAYS, AUDITION, GET AN AGENT, DO COMMERCIALS AND SHORT FILMS, THEN GET MY SAG CARD. 230 00:09:31,848 --> 00:09:33,381 DO COMMERCIALS AND SHORT FILMS, THEN GET MY SAG CARD. BUT IF THAT FAILED, I ALSO 231 00:09:33,383 --> 00:09:34,115 THEN GET MY SAG CARD. BUT IF THAT FAILED, I ALSO PRESENTED THEM WITH A BACKUP 232 00:09:34,117 --> 00:09:34,415 BUT IF THAT FAILED, I ALSO PRESENTED THEM WITH A BACKUP PLAN. 233 00:09:34,417 --> 00:09:38,953 PRESENTED THEM WITH A BACKUP PLAN. NEXT SLIDE. 234 00:09:38,955 --> 00:09:40,922 PLAN. NEXT SLIDE. WHILE I'M UP HERE, I DO WANT TO 235 00:09:40,924 --> 00:09:42,490 NEXT SLIDE. WHILE I'M UP HERE, I DO WANT TO TALK ABOUT SOME STUFF I'VE SEEN 236 00:09:42,492 --> 00:09:43,524 WHILE I'M UP HERE, I DO WANT TO TALK ABOUT SOME STUFF I'VE SEEN ABOUT ME ONLINE. 237 00:09:43,526 --> 00:09:45,660 TALK ABOUT SOME STUFF I'VE SEEN ABOUT ME ONLINE. LIKE I ONCE SAID THAT I USED TO 238 00:09:45,662 --> 00:09:47,829 ABOUT ME ONLINE. LIKE I ONCE SAID THAT I USED TO WORK AT UNIVERSAL STUDIOS, AND 239 00:09:47,831 --> 00:09:49,464 LIKE I ONCE SAID THAT I USED TO WORK AT UNIVERSAL STUDIOS, AND SOMEONE ONLINE ACCUSED ME OF 240 00:09:49,466 --> 00:09:50,832 WORK AT UNIVERSAL STUDIOS, AND SOMEONE ONLINE ACCUSED ME OF LYING ABOUT THAT, WHICH IS 241 00:09:50,834 --> 00:09:51,566 SOMEONE ONLINE ACCUSED ME OF LYING ABOUT THAT, WHICH IS INSANE. 242 00:09:51,568 --> 00:09:53,001 LYING ABOUT THAT, WHICH IS INSANE. IF I DIDN'T WORK THERE, HOW 243 00:09:53,003 --> 00:09:58,606 INSANE. IF I DIDN'T WORK THERE, HOW WOULD I KNOW ALL THE UNIVERSAL 244 00:09:58,608 --> 00:10:01,509 IF I DIDN'T WORK THERE, HOW WOULD I KNOW ALL THE UNIVERSAL CHARACTERS LIKE SHROK, THE 245 00:10:01,511 --> 00:10:03,177 WOULD I KNOW ALL THE UNIVERSAL CHARACTERS LIKE SHROK, THE MUNIONS AND HARRY PORTER. 246 00:10:03,179 --> 00:10:05,079 CHARACTERS LIKE SHROK, THE MUNIONS AND HARRY PORTER. THEN A WOMAN WENT VIRAL ON 247 00:10:05,081 --> 00:10:08,216 MUNIONS AND HARRY PORTER. THEN A WOMAN WENT VIRAL ON TIKTOK BECAUSE SHE CLAIMED SHE'S 248 00:10:08,218 --> 00:10:09,417 THEN A WOMAN WENT VIRAL ON TIKTOK BECAUSE SHE CLAIMED SHE'S MY NUTRITIONIST. 249 00:10:09,419 --> 00:10:11,252 TIKTOK BECAUSE SHE CLAIMED SHE'S MY NUTRITIONIST. I'M IN SHAPE BECAUSE I RUN, 250 00:10:11,254 --> 00:10:18,993 MY NUTRITIONIST. I'M IN SHAPE BECAUSE I RUN, AVOID SUGAR, AND DO OZEMPIC. 251 00:10:18,995 --> 00:10:21,195 I'M IN SHAPE BECAUSE I RUN, AVOID SUGAR, AND DO OZEMPIC. BUT THE CRAZIEST RUMOR IS THAT I 252 00:10:21,197 --> 00:10:24,032 AVOID SUGAR, AND DO OZEMPIC. BUT THE CRAZIEST RUMOR IS THAT I WAS HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH MY 253 00:10:24,034 --> 00:10:24,966 BUT THE CRAZIEST RUMOR IS THAT I WAS HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH MY COSTAR GLENN POWELL. 254 00:10:24,968 --> 00:10:26,668 WAS HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH MY COSTAR GLENN POWELL. THAT'S OBVIOUSLY NOT TRUE. 255 00:10:26,670 --> 00:10:28,770 COSTAR GLENN POWELL. THAT'S OBVIOUSLY NOT TRUE. ME AND MY FIANCE PRODUCED THE 256 00:10:28,772 --> 00:10:30,571 THAT'S OBVIOUSLY NOT TRUE. ME AND MY FIANCE PRODUCED THE MOVIE TOGETHER, AND HE WAS THERE 257 00:10:30,573 --> 00:10:31,472 ME AND MY FIANCE PRODUCED THE MOVIE TOGETHER, AND HE WAS THERE THE ENTIRE SHOOT. 258 00:10:31,474 --> 00:10:32,874 MOVIE TOGETHER, AND HE WAS THERE THE ENTIRE SHOOT. AND I JUST WANT TO LET EVERYONE 259 00:10:32,876 --> 00:10:35,877 THE ENTIRE SHOOT. AND I JUST WANT TO LET EVERYONE KNOW THAT HE'S THE MAN OF MY 260 00:10:35,879 --> 00:10:36,611 AND I JUST WANT TO LET EVERYONE KNOW THAT HE'S THE MAN OF MY DREAMS, AND WE'RE STILL TOGETHER 261 00:10:36,613 --> 00:10:37,612 KNOW THAT HE'S THE MAN OF MY DREAMS, AND WE'RE STILL TOGETHER AND STRONGER THAN EVER. 262 00:10:37,614 --> 00:10:38,913 DREAMS, AND WE'RE STILL TOGETHER AND STRONGER THAN EVER. HE EVEN CAME HERE TONIGHT TO 263 00:10:38,915 --> 00:10:39,881 AND STRONGER THAN EVER. HE EVEN CAME HERE TONIGHT TO SUPPORT ME. 264 00:10:39,883 --> 00:10:46,621 HE EVEN CAME HERE TONIGHT TO SUPPORT ME. CAN WE CUT TO HIM? 265 00:10:46,623 --> 00:10:47,221 SUPPORT ME. CAN WE CUT TO HIM? [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 266 00:10:47,223 --> 00:10:49,023 CAN WE CUT TO HIM? [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] THAT'S NOT MY FIANCE. 267 00:10:49,025 --> 00:10:51,259 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] THAT'S NOT MY FIANCE. HE'S IN MY DRESSING ROOM! 268 00:10:51,261 --> 00:10:53,761 THAT'S NOT MY FIANCE. HE'S IN MY DRESSING ROOM! WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU 269 00:10:53,763 --> 00:11:18,086 HE'S IN MY DRESSING ROOM! WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU 270 00:11:18,088 --> 00:11:18,553 WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU >>> ALL RIGHT. 271 00:11:18,555 --> 00:11:21,155 >>> ALL RIGHT. GOOD MORNING, TEAM. IT'S MONDAY. 272 00:11:21,157 --> 00:11:22,623 GOOD MORNING, TEAM. IT'S MONDAY. YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS. 273 00:11:22,625 --> 00:11:24,659 IT'S MONDAY. YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS. IT'S TIME TO TOUCH BASE ON OUR 274 00:11:24,661 --> 00:11:26,494 YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS. IT'S TIME TO TOUCH BASE ON OUR LOGS OF COLD CASES. 275 00:11:26,496 --> 00:11:28,463 IT'S TIME TO TOUCH BASE ON OUR LOGS OF COLD CASES. FIRST WE HAVE TWO NEW INTERNS 276 00:11:28,465 --> 00:11:30,064 LOGS OF COLD CASES. FIRST WE HAVE TWO NEW INTERNS HERE FOR COLLEGE CREDIT. 277 00:11:30,066 --> 00:11:31,632 FIRST WE HAVE TWO NEW INTERNS HERE FOR COLLEGE CREDIT. EVERYBODY, LET'S WELCOME OLIVIA 278 00:11:31,634 --> 00:11:32,834 HERE FOR COLLEGE CREDIT. EVERYBODY, LET'S WELCOME OLIVIA AND KAIA. 279 00:11:32,836 --> 00:11:33,868 EVERYBODY, LET'S WELCOME OLIVIA AND KAIA. GIRLS, WHY DON'T YOU TELL US 280 00:11:33,870 --> 00:11:34,368 AND KAIA. GIRLS, WHY DON'T YOU TELL US ABOUT YOURSELVES? 281 00:11:34,370 --> 00:11:38,806 GIRLS, WHY DON'T YOU TELL US ABOUT YOURSELVES? >> HI. 282 00:11:38,808 --> 00:11:39,474 ABOUT YOURSELVES? >> HI. >> OKAY. 283 00:11:39,476 --> 00:11:40,374 >> HI. >> OKAY. ALL RIGHT. 284 00:11:40,376 --> 00:11:43,678 >> OKAY. ALL RIGHT. FIRST UP, WE HAVE CASE FILE 285 00:11:43,680 --> 00:11:45,246 ALL RIGHT. FIRST UP, WE HAVE CASE FILE 442 -- OH, LOOK AT THAT. 286 00:11:45,248 --> 00:11:47,048 FIRST UP, WE HAVE CASE FILE 442 -- OH, LOOK AT THAT. BEAUTIFUL NAKED WOMAN'S BODY 287 00:11:47,050 --> 00:11:48,649 442 -- OH, LOOK AT THAT. BEAUTIFUL NAKED WOMAN'S BODY FOUND IN THE LAKE. 288 00:11:48,651 --> 00:11:49,750 BEAUTIFUL NAKED WOMAN'S BODY FOUND IN THE LAKE. >> YEAH. 289 00:11:49,752 --> 00:11:50,351 FOUND IN THE LAKE. >> YEAH. THAT'S RIGHT. 290 00:11:50,353 --> 00:11:52,086 >> YEAH. THAT'S RIGHT. WE SUSPECT IT WAS THE HUSBAND 291 00:11:52,088 --> 00:11:54,422 THAT'S RIGHT. WE SUSPECT IT WAS THE HUSBAND AND THE MOTIVE WAS AN AFFAIR. 292 00:11:54,424 --> 00:11:55,456 WE SUSPECT IT WAS THE HUSBAND AND THE MOTIVE WAS AN AFFAIR. BUT STILL DON'T HAVE THE 293 00:11:55,458 --> 00:11:57,091 AND THE MOTIVE WAS AN AFFAIR. BUT STILL DON'T HAVE THE EVIDENCE TO PIN IT ON HIM. 294 00:11:57,093 --> 00:11:58,726 BUT STILL DON'T HAVE THE EVIDENCE TO PIN IT ON HIM. OUR LAST LEAD WAS A PLANE TICKET 295 00:11:58,728 --> 00:12:00,461 EVIDENCE TO PIN IT ON HIM. OUR LAST LEAD WAS A PLANE TICKET WE FOUND IN HIS TRASH, BUT THE 296 00:12:00,463 --> 00:12:00,995 OUR LAST LEAD WAS A PLANE TICKET WE FOUND IN HIS TRASH, BUT THE TRAIL'S GONE COLD. 297 00:12:00,997 --> 00:12:04,866 WE FOUND IN HIS TRASH, BUT THE TRAIL'S GONE COLD. >> FOUND HIM. 298 00:12:04,868 --> 00:12:06,334 TRAIL'S GONE COLD. >> FOUND HIM. >> WHAT'S THAT? 299 00:12:06,336 --> 00:12:08,769 >> FOUND HIM. >> WHAT'S THAT? >> HE'S IN DELTONA. 300 00:12:08,771 --> 00:12:09,237 >> WHAT'S THAT? >> HE'S IN DELTONA. >> WHAT? 301 00:12:09,239 --> 00:12:10,471 >> HE'S IN DELTONA. >> WHAT? HOW DID YOU FIND HIM? 302 00:12:10,473 --> 00:12:13,007 >> WHAT? HOW DID YOU FIND HIM? >> INSTAGRAM, DUH. 303 00:12:13,009 --> 00:12:13,808 HOW DID YOU FIND HIM? >> INSTAGRAM, DUH. >> YEAH. 304 00:12:13,810 --> 00:12:14,742 >> INSTAGRAM, DUH. >> YEAH. IT WAS EASY. 305 00:12:14,744 --> 00:12:16,344 >> YEAH. IT WAS EASY. I LOCKED INTO MY TROLL ACCOUNT 306 00:12:16,346 --> 00:12:18,679 IT WAS EASY. I LOCKED INTO MY TROLL ACCOUNT AND SAW WE HAD A MUTUAL, SO I 307 00:12:18,681 --> 00:12:21,115 I LOCKED INTO MY TROLL ACCOUNT AND SAW WE HAD A MUTUAL, SO I PEEPED HER IG, AND HE'S 308 00:12:21,117 --> 00:12:21,949 AND SAW WE HAD A MUTUAL, SO I PEEPED HER IG, AND HE'S LITERALLY ON GRID. 309 00:12:21,951 --> 00:12:23,551 PEEPED HER IG, AND HE'S LITERALLY ON GRID. THE RECEIPTS ARE ALL THERE. 310 00:12:23,553 --> 00:12:25,820 LITERALLY ON GRID. THE RECEIPTS ARE ALL THERE. >> WELL, THAT'S VERY GOOD. 311 00:12:25,822 --> 00:12:27,321 THE RECEIPTS ARE ALL THERE. >> WELL, THAT'S VERY GOOD. HOW DID YOU DO THAT? 312 00:12:27,323 --> 00:12:31,225 >> WELL, THAT'S VERY GOOD. HOW DID YOU DO THAT? >> WE'RE 22-YEAR-OLD GIRLS IN 313 00:12:31,227 --> 00:12:31,792 HOW DID YOU DO THAT? >> WE'RE 22-YEAR-OLD GIRLS IN SITUATIONSHIPS. 314 00:12:31,794 --> 00:12:33,127 >> WE'RE 22-YEAR-OLD GIRLS IN SITUATIONSHIPS. WE CAN FIND OUT ANYTHING ABOUT 315 00:12:33,129 --> 00:12:35,163 SITUATIONSHIPS. WE CAN FIND OUT ANYTHING ABOUT ANYONE WITH LITERALLY NO 316 00:12:35,165 --> 00:12:35,596 WE CAN FIND OUT ANYTHING ABOUT ANYONE WITH LITERALLY NO INFORMATION. 317 00:12:35,598 --> 00:12:38,299 ANYONE WITH LITERALLY NO INFORMATION. >> MY SCREEN TIME IS 23 HOURS A 318 00:12:38,301 --> 00:12:40,668 INFORMATION. >> MY SCREEN TIME IS 23 HOURS A DAY, AND THE OTHER HOUR, I'M 319 00:12:40,670 --> 00:12:43,437 >> MY SCREEN TIME IS 23 HOURS A DAY, AND THE OTHER HOUR, I'M SHOPLIFTING FROM BRANDI 320 00:12:43,439 --> 00:12:43,804 DAY, AND THE OTHER HOUR, I'M SHOPLIFTING FROM BRANDI MELVILLE. 321 00:12:43,806 --> 00:12:44,739 SHOPLIFTING FROM BRANDI MELVILLE. >> ALL RIGHT THEN. 322 00:12:44,741 --> 00:12:46,340 MELVILLE. >> ALL RIGHT THEN. COOL, COOL, COOL. 323 00:12:46,342 --> 00:12:47,208 >> ALL RIGHT THEN. COOL, COOL, COOL. CASE CLOSED. 324 00:12:47,210 --> 00:12:50,178 COOL, COOL, COOL. CASE CLOSED. I GUESS WE CAN MOVE ON TO CASE 325 00:12:50,180 --> 00:12:51,512 CASE CLOSED. I GUESS WE CAN MOVE ON TO CASE FILE 729. 326 00:12:51,514 --> 00:12:54,015 I GUESS WE CAN MOVE ON TO CASE FILE 729. LOOK AT THAT, ANOTHER PRETTY 327 00:12:54,017 --> 00:12:54,582 FILE 729. LOOK AT THAT, ANOTHER PRETTY NAKED WOMAN. 328 00:12:54,584 --> 00:12:55,483 LOOK AT THAT, ANOTHER PRETTY NAKED WOMAN. THIS TIME IN THE WOODS. 329 00:12:55,485 --> 00:12:56,817 NAKED WOMAN. THIS TIME IN THE WOODS. >> THAT'S RIGHT, BOSS. 330 00:12:56,819 --> 00:12:58,786 THIS TIME IN THE WOODS. >> THAT'S RIGHT, BOSS. WE SUSPECT IT WAS HER HIKING 331 00:12:58,788 --> 00:13:00,922 >> THAT'S RIGHT, BOSS. WE SUSPECT IT WAS HER HIKING BUDDY TONY. 332 00:13:00,924 --> 00:13:01,689 WE SUSPECT IT WAS HER HIKING BUDDY TONY. HE CLAIMS HE WAS AT LUNCH WITH 333 00:13:01,691 --> 00:13:03,491 BUDDY TONY. HE CLAIMS HE WAS AT LUNCH WITH HIS MOTHER AT THE TIME, BUT I 334 00:13:03,493 --> 00:13:03,958 HE CLAIMS HE WAS AT LUNCH WITH HIS MOTHER AT THE TIME, BUT I BET THAT'S BS. 335 00:13:03,960 --> 00:13:04,725 HIS MOTHER AT THE TIME, BUT I BET THAT'S BS. >> HOW OLD IS HE? 336 00:13:04,727 --> 00:13:05,126 BET THAT'S BS. >> HOW OLD IS HE? >> HE'S 40. 337 00:13:05,128 --> 00:13:09,030 >> HOW OLD IS HE? >> HE'S 40. >> SO FACEBOOK. 338 00:13:09,032 --> 00:13:11,899 >> HE'S 40. >> SO FACEBOOK. >> TONY'S ON THE LAM BUT BASED 339 00:13:11,901 --> 00:13:14,135 >> SO FACEBOOK. >> TONY'S ON THE LAM BUT BASED ON HIS CELL PHONE DATA, WE CAN 340 00:13:14,137 --> 00:13:16,604 >> TONY'S ON THE LAM BUT BASED ON HIS CELL PHONE DATA, WE CAN LOCATE HIM TO IT, ARIZONA, AND 341 00:13:16,606 --> 00:13:17,038 ON HIS CELL PHONE DATA, WE CAN LOCATE HIM TO IT, ARIZONA, AND RHODE ISLAND. 342 00:13:17,040 --> 00:13:17,638 LOCATE HIM TO IT, ARIZONA, AND RHODE ISLAND. >> FOUND HIM. 343 00:13:17,640 --> 00:13:17,939 RHODE ISLAND. >> FOUND HIM. HERE. 344 00:13:17,941 --> 00:13:21,209 >> FOUND HIM. HERE. WE'LL SHOW YOU. 345 00:13:21,211 --> 00:13:23,077 HERE. WE'LL SHOW YOU. HIS FACEBOOK IS PRIVATE, BUT HIS 346 00:13:23,079 --> 00:13:25,079 WE'LL SHOW YOU. HIS FACEBOOK IS PRIVATE, BUT HIS MOM'S IS VERY MUCH PUBLIC. 347 00:13:25,081 --> 00:13:28,783 HIS FACEBOOK IS PRIVATE, BUT HIS MOM'S IS VERY MUCH PUBLIC. SHE POSTS WHAT CAN ONLY BE 348 00:13:28,785 --> 00:13:32,553 MOM'S IS VERY MUCH PUBLIC. SHE POSTS WHAT CAN ONLY BE DESCRIBED AS A DIARY ENTRY EVERY 349 00:13:32,555 --> 00:13:32,853 SHE POSTS WHAT CAN ONLY BE DESCRIBED AS A DIARY ENTRY EVERY DAY. 350 00:13:32,855 --> 00:13:34,088 DESCRIBED AS A DIARY ENTRY EVERY DAY. >> ON TUESDAY, SHE WROTE I GOT 351 00:13:34,090 --> 00:13:35,957 DAY. >> ON TUESDAY, SHE WROTE I GOT LUNCH WITH MY BEAUTIFUL SON, 352 00:13:35,959 --> 00:13:38,125 >> ON TUESDAY, SHE WROTE I GOT LUNCH WITH MY BEAUTIFUL SON, SPLIT THE FAJITAS, I LOVE MY 353 00:13:38,127 --> 00:13:38,426 LUNCH WITH MY BEAUTIFUL SON, SPLIT THE FAJITAS, I LOVE MY SON. 354 00:13:38,428 --> 00:13:39,193 SPLIT THE FAJITAS, I LOVE MY SON. >> WOW. 355 00:13:39,195 --> 00:13:40,928 SON. >> WOW. WE ARE REALLY BLOWING THROUGH 356 00:13:40,930 --> 00:13:41,229 >> WOW. WE ARE REALLY BLOWING THROUGH THESE. 357 00:13:41,231 --> 00:13:42,496 WE ARE REALLY BLOWING THROUGH THESE. ALL RIGHT. 358 00:13:42,498 --> 00:13:44,232 THESE. ALL RIGHT. CASE NUMBER 904. 359 00:13:44,234 --> 00:13:45,132 ALL RIGHT. CASE NUMBER 904. ALL RIGHT. 360 00:13:45,134 --> 00:13:47,568 CASE NUMBER 904. ALL RIGHT. MAN, ANOTHER GORGEOUS LADY FOUND 361 00:13:47,570 --> 00:13:48,169 ALL RIGHT. MAN, ANOTHER GORGEOUS LADY FOUND DEAD INSIDE THE MALL. 362 00:13:48,171 --> 00:13:50,471 MAN, ANOTHER GORGEOUS LADY FOUND DEAD INSIDE THE MALL. >> STOP CALLING THEM GORGEOUS. 363 00:13:50,473 --> 00:13:50,905 DEAD INSIDE THE MALL. >> STOP CALLING THEM GORGEOUS. >> I'M SORRY. 364 00:13:50,907 --> 00:13:58,145 >> STOP CALLING THEM GORGEOUS. >> I'M SORRY. CAKED UP? 365 00:13:58,147 --> 00:13:59,647 >> I'M SORRY. CAKED UP? ANYWAY, WE THINK IT MIGHT BE 366 00:13:59,649 --> 00:14:02,516 CAKED UP? ANYWAY, WE THINK IT MIGHT BE CONNECTED TO A BURGLARY AT THE 367 00:14:02,518 --> 00:14:03,851 ANYWAY, WE THINK IT MIGHT BE CONNECTED TO A BURGLARY AT THE AUNTIE ANNIE'S. 368 00:14:03,853 --> 00:14:04,352 CONNECTED TO A BURGLARY AT THE AUNTIE ANNIE'S. >> THAT'S RIGHT. 369 00:14:04,354 --> 00:14:06,220 AUNTIE ANNIE'S. >> THAT'S RIGHT. I FOUND THE MANAGER'S DIGITS SO 370 00:14:06,222 --> 00:14:13,494 >> THAT'S RIGHT. I FOUND THE MANAGER'S DIGITS SO I SHOT HIM A TEXT, BUT IT WASN'T 371 00:14:13,496 --> 00:14:14,996 I FOUND THE MANAGER'S DIGITS SO I SHOT HIM A TEXT, BUT IT WASN'T VERY BUSSEN, CAP? 372 00:14:14,998 --> 00:14:16,797 I SHOT HIM A TEXT, BUT IT WASN'T VERY BUSSEN, CAP? >> YOU DON'T GOT TO TALK LIKE 373 00:14:16,799 --> 00:14:17,098 VERY BUSSEN, CAP? >> YOU DON'T GOT TO TALK LIKE THEM. 374 00:14:17,100 --> 00:14:17,498 >> YOU DON'T GOT TO TALK LIKE THEM. >> GOT IT. 375 00:14:17,500 --> 00:14:19,900 THEM. >> GOT IT. >> FOUND THEM. 376 00:14:19,902 --> 00:14:24,839 >> GOT IT. >> FOUND THEM. SO I DID A SEARCH, AND THEN I 377 00:14:24,841 --> 00:14:29,176 >> FOUND THEM. SO I DID A SEARCH, AND THEN I GOT BORED AND ORDERED A SHIRT ON 378 00:14:29,178 --> 00:14:30,645 SO I DID A SEARCH, AND THEN I GOT BORED AND ORDERED A SHIRT ON DEPOP, AND THEN DOMINOS WAS 379 00:14:30,647 --> 00:14:32,480 GOT BORED AND ORDERED A SHIRT ON DEPOP, AND THEN DOMINOS WAS LIKE, I MISS YOU, AND I WAS 380 00:14:32,482 --> 00:14:34,548 DEPOP, AND THEN DOMINOS WAS LIKE, I MISS YOU, AND I WAS LIKE, FINE, I'LL GET A PIZZA. 381 00:14:34,550 --> 00:14:36,951 LIKE, I MISS YOU, AND I WAS LIKE, FINE, I'LL GET A PIZZA. >> AND THEN FROM TUMBLER, I 382 00:14:36,953 --> 00:14:39,687 LIKE, FINE, I'LL GET A PIZZA. >> AND THEN FROM TUMBLER, I FOUND HIS TWITTER -- SORRY, X -- 383 00:14:39,689 --> 00:14:42,056 >> AND THEN FROM TUMBLER, I FOUND HIS TWITTER -- SORRY, X -- AND THEN A TOOK A BUZZ FEED 384 00:14:42,058 --> 00:14:42,356 FOUND HIS TWITTER -- SORRY, X -- AND THEN A TOOK A BUZZ FEED QUIZ. 385 00:14:42,358 --> 00:14:44,392 AND THEN A TOOK A BUZZ FEED QUIZ. >> I TOOK THAT SAME BUZZ FEED 386 00:14:44,394 --> 00:14:44,792 QUIZ. >> I TOOK THAT SAME BUZZ FEED QUIZ. 387 00:14:44,794 --> 00:14:47,161 >> I TOOK THAT SAME BUZZ FEED QUIZ. WHY DID YOU GET ANDY COHEN? 388 00:14:47,163 --> 00:14:48,262 QUIZ. WHY DID YOU GET ANDY COHEN? I AIN'T TRIPPING THOUGH. 389 00:14:48,264 --> 00:14:49,397 WHY DID YOU GET ANDY COHEN? I AIN'T TRIPPING THOUGH. I LIKE A LITTLE FRUIT IN MY 390 00:14:49,399 --> 00:14:51,799 I AIN'T TRIPPING THOUGH. I LIKE A LITTLE FRUIT IN MY SALAD. 391 00:14:51,801 --> 00:14:54,302 I LIKE A LITTLE FRUIT IN MY SALAD. >> SO THEN I WATCHED HIS SNAP 392 00:14:54,304 --> 00:14:55,636 SALAD. >> SO THEN I WATCHED HIS SNAP CHAT STORY AND IT WAS JUST HIM 393 00:14:55,638 --> 00:14:57,505 >> SO THEN I WATCHED HIS SNAP CHAT STORY AND IT WAS JUST HIM WITH A BUNCH OF SOFT PRETZELS 394 00:14:57,507 --> 00:14:57,938 CHAT STORY AND IT WAS JUST HIM WITH A BUNCH OF SOFT PRETZELS AND CASH. 395 00:14:57,940 --> 00:15:00,608 WITH A BUNCH OF SOFT PRETZELS AND CASH. AND YEAH, I HAVE SCREEN SHOTS, 396 00:15:00,610 --> 00:15:00,975 AND CASH. AND YEAH, I HAVE SCREEN SHOTS, SO YEA. 397 00:15:00,977 --> 00:15:04,378 AND YEAH, I HAVE SCREEN SHOTS, SO YEA. >> WELL, I THOUGHT YOU COULDN'T 398 00:15:04,380 --> 00:15:05,313 SO YEA. >> WELL, I THOUGHT YOU COULDN'T TAKE SCREEN SHOTS ON SNAP CHAT, 399 00:15:05,315 --> 00:15:06,814 >> WELL, I THOUGHT YOU COULDN'T TAKE SCREEN SHOTS ON SNAP CHAT, THAT THE WHOLE POINT IS THAT YOU 400 00:15:06,816 --> 00:15:07,615 TAKE SCREEN SHOTS ON SNAP CHAT, THAT THE WHOLE POINT IS THAT YOU CAN SEND WHATEVER. 401 00:15:07,617 --> 00:15:08,316 THAT THE WHOLE POINT IS THAT YOU CAN SEND WHATEVER. >> NO. 402 00:15:08,318 --> 00:15:11,585 CAN SEND WHATEVER. >> NO. YOU DEFINITELY CAN TAKE SCREEN 403 00:15:11,587 --> 00:15:11,886 >> NO. YOU DEFINITELY CAN TAKE SCREEN SHOTS. 404 00:15:11,888 --> 00:15:16,057 YOU DEFINITELY CAN TAKE SCREEN SHOTS. >> I HAVE TO GO. 405 00:15:16,059 --> 00:15:17,625 SHOTS. >> I HAVE TO GO. >> WELL, WE ARE DEFINITELY GOING 406 00:15:17,627 --> 00:15:18,292 >> I HAVE TO GO. >> WELL, WE ARE DEFINITELY GOING TO HAVE A MEETING FOR THAT 407 00:15:18,294 --> 00:15:20,895 >> WELL, WE ARE DEFINITELY GOING TO HAVE A MEETING FOR THAT TOMORROW. 408 00:15:20,897 --> 00:15:22,330 TO HAVE A MEETING FOR THAT TOMORROW. ANYWAY, ON TO THE NEXT CASE. 409 00:15:22,332 --> 00:15:23,731 TOMORROW. ANYWAY, ON TO THE NEXT CASE. >> PLEASE, YOU HAVE TO HELP ME. 410 00:15:23,733 --> 00:15:24,899 ANYWAY, ON TO THE NEXT CASE. >> PLEASE, YOU HAVE TO HELP ME. >> OH, MY GOD. 411 00:15:24,901 --> 00:15:25,966 >> PLEASE, YOU HAVE TO HELP ME. >> OH, MY GOD. LOOK AT THIS. 412 00:15:25,968 --> 00:15:27,935 >> OH, MY GOD. LOOK AT THIS. A GORGEOUS FULLY CLOTHED WOMAN. 413 00:15:27,937 --> 00:15:29,403 LOOK AT THIS. A GORGEOUS FULLY CLOTHED WOMAN. >> MY HUSBAND, I THOUGHT HE WAS 414 00:15:29,405 --> 00:15:31,072 A GORGEOUS FULLY CLOTHED WOMAN. >> MY HUSBAND, I THOUGHT HE WAS ON A BUSINESS TRIP, AND HE 415 00:15:31,074 --> 00:15:31,839 >> MY HUSBAND, I THOUGHT HE WAS ON A BUSINESS TRIP, AND HE HASN'T COME HOME FOR SIX WEEKS. 416 00:15:31,841 --> 00:15:34,442 ON A BUSINESS TRIP, AND HE HASN'T COME HOME FOR SIX WEEKS. >> FOUND HIM. 417 00:15:34,444 --> 00:15:39,013 HASN'T COME HOME FOR SIX WEEKS. >> FOUND HIM. GIRL, HE'S ON LOVE IS BLIND. 418 00:15:39,015 --> 00:15:39,747 >> FOUND HIM. GIRL, HE'S ON LOVE IS BLIND. >> HOW DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING 419 00:15:39,749 --> 00:15:42,483 GIRL, HE'S ON LOVE IS BLIND. >> HOW DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING TO ME? 420 00:15:42,485 --> 00:15:44,085 >> HOW DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING TO ME? >> ALL RIGHT. 421 00:15:44,087 --> 00:15:46,754 TO ME? >> ALL RIGHT. WELL, OLIVIA AND KAIA JUST 422 00:15:46,756 --> 00:15:48,389 >> ALL RIGHT. WELL, OLIVIA AND KAIA JUST FINISHED ALL THE WORK WE HAD 423 00:15:48,391 --> 00:15:49,957 WELL, OLIVIA AND KAIA JUST FINISHED ALL THE WORK WE HAD PLANNED FOR THE NEXT TWO YEARS, 424 00:15:49,959 --> 00:15:52,026 FINISHED ALL THE WORK WE HAD PLANNED FOR THE NEXT TWO YEARS, SO Y'ALL WANT TO PLAY UNO. 425 00:15:52,028 --> 00:15:55,529 PLANNED FOR THE NEXT TWO YEARS, SO Y'ALL WANT TO PLAY UNO. >> IS THIS YOUR ONLYFANS? 426 00:15:55,531 --> 00:15:56,030 SO Y'ALL WANT TO PLAY UNO. >> IS THIS YOUR ONLYFANS? >> NO, IT IS NOT. 427 00:15:56,032 --> 00:16:03,070 >> IS THIS YOUR ONLYFANS? >> NO, IT IS NOT. I HAVE TO GO. 428 00:16:11,179 --> 00:16:16,884 >>> I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE HE'S GONE. >> MAYBE WE SHOULD JUST GO HOME. 429 00:16:16,886 --> 00:16:17,818 GONE. >> MAYBE WE SHOULD JUST GO HOME. >> HEY, GUYS. 430 00:16:17,820 --> 00:16:19,220 >> MAYBE WE SHOULD JUST GO HOME. >> HEY, GUYS. >> OH, HEY SYDNEY. 431 00:16:19,222 --> 00:16:20,521 >> HEY, GUYS. >> OH, HEY SYDNEY. >> WHAT'S WRONG? 432 00:16:20,523 --> 00:16:21,856 >> OH, HEY SYDNEY. >> WHAT'S WRONG? >> I DON'T WANT TO BURDEN YOU 433 00:16:21,858 --> 00:16:25,526 >> WHAT'S WRONG? >> I DON'T WANT TO BURDEN YOU WITH THIS, BUT ONE OF OUR 434 00:16:25,528 --> 00:16:27,895 >> I DON'T WANT TO BURDEN YOU WITH THIS, BUT ONE OF OUR FRIENDS JUST PASSED. 435 00:16:27,897 --> 00:16:28,429 WITH THIS, BUT ONE OF OUR FRIENDS JUST PASSED. >> THAT'S HORRIBLE. 436 00:16:28,431 --> 00:16:30,765 FRIENDS JUST PASSED. >> THAT'S HORRIBLE. I'M SO SORRY. 437 00:16:30,767 --> 00:16:31,999 >> THAT'S HORRIBLE. I'M SO SORRY. >> YEAH. 438 00:16:32,001 --> 00:16:34,135 I'M SO SORRY. >> YEAH. >> DO YOU MIND IF I ASK WHAT 439 00:16:34,137 --> 00:16:35,503 >> YEAH. >> DO YOU MIND IF I ASK WHAT HAPPENED? 440 00:16:35,505 --> 00:16:37,204 >> DO YOU MIND IF I ASK WHAT HAPPENED? >> SURE. 441 00:16:37,206 --> 00:16:41,409 HAPPENED? >> SURE. GOD, HE WAS ON VACATION IN 442 00:16:41,411 --> 00:16:42,810 >> SURE. GOD, HE WAS ON VACATION IN ARIZONA, AND -- THIS IS GOING TO 443 00:16:42,812 --> 00:16:45,980 GOD, HE WAS ON VACATION IN ARIZONA, AND -- THIS IS GOING TO SOUND LIKE A JOKE -- BUT A 444 00:16:45,982 --> 00:16:48,149 ARIZONA, AND -- THIS IS GOING TO SOUND LIKE A JOKE -- BUT A DONKEY KICKED HIM IN THE NUTS SO 445 00:16:48,151 --> 00:16:48,816 SOUND LIKE A JOKE -- BUT A DONKEY KICKED HIM IN THE NUTS SO HARD HE FELL INTO THE GRAND 446 00:16:48,818 --> 00:16:50,117 DONKEY KICKED HIM IN THE NUTS SO HARD HE FELL INTO THE GRAND CANYON. 447 00:16:50,119 --> 00:16:55,489 HARD HE FELL INTO THE GRAND CANYON. >> WHAT? 448 00:16:55,491 --> 00:16:56,891 CANYON. >> WHAT? >> MAYBE LET'S NOT LAUGH ABOUT 449 00:16:56,893 --> 00:16:59,460 >> WHAT? >> MAYBE LET'S NOT LAUGH ABOUT OUR FRIEND WHO JUST DIED. 450 00:16:59,462 --> 00:17:02,430 >> MAYBE LET'S NOT LAUGH ABOUT OUR FRIEND WHO JUST DIED. >> WAIT, YOU'RE BEING SERIOUS? 451 00:17:02,432 --> 00:17:02,930 OUR FRIEND WHO JUST DIED. >> WAIT, YOU'RE BEING SERIOUS? >> YEAH. 452 00:17:02,932 --> 00:17:05,599 >> WAIT, YOU'RE BEING SERIOUS? >> YEAH. BUT THE IMPACT DIDN'T KILL HIM 453 00:17:05,601 --> 00:17:07,001 >> YEAH. BUT THE IMPACT DIDN'T KILL HIM BECAUSE -- AND I KNOW THIS 454 00:17:07,003 --> 00:17:09,670 BUT THE IMPACT DIDN'T KILL HIM BECAUSE -- AND I KNOW THIS SOUNDS SILLY, BUT HE WAS ON 455 00:17:09,672 --> 00:17:10,971 BECAUSE -- AND I KNOW THIS SOUNDS SILLY, BUT HE WAS ON ROLLER SKATES. 456 00:17:10,973 --> 00:17:11,839 SOUNDS SILLY, BUT HE WAS ON ROLLER SKATES. >> SO HE -- 457 00:17:11,841 --> 00:17:14,175 ROLLER SKATES. >> SO HE -- >> SHREDDED THE GRAND CANYON 458 00:17:14,177 --> 00:17:15,943 >> SO HE -- >> SHREDDED THE GRAND CANYON LIKE A HALF PIPE, YEAH. 459 00:17:15,945 --> 00:17:17,278 >> SHREDDED THE GRAND CANYON LIKE A HALF PIPE, YEAH. >> WOW, THAT'S -- 460 00:17:17,280 --> 00:17:18,813 LIKE A HALF PIPE, YEAH. >> WOW, THAT'S -- >> BUT WHEN HE LANDED ON THE 461 00:17:18,815 --> 00:17:20,514 >> WOW, THAT'S -- >> BUT WHEN HE LANDED ON THE OTHER SIDE -- AND I KNOW THIS IS 462 00:17:20,516 --> 00:17:23,250 >> BUT WHEN HE LANDED ON THE OTHER SIDE -- AND I KNOW THIS IS GOING TO SOUND CARTOONISH, BUT 463 00:17:23,252 --> 00:17:27,154 OTHER SIDE -- AND I KNOW THIS IS GOING TO SOUND CARTOONISH, BUT HE SKADOOSH'D OFF A FAT GUY'S 464 00:17:27,156 --> 00:17:30,491 GOING TO SOUND CARTOONISH, BUT HE SKADOOSH'D OFF A FAT GUY'S STOMACH LIKE KUNG FU PANDA AND 465 00:17:30,493 --> 00:17:30,991 HE SKADOOSH'D OFF A FAT GUY'S STOMACH LIKE KUNG FU PANDA AND EXPLODED ON SITE. 466 00:17:30,993 --> 00:17:33,594 STOMACH LIKE KUNG FU PANDA AND EXPLODED ON SITE. >> YOU GUYS AREN'T MESSING WITH 467 00:17:33,596 --> 00:17:34,695 EXPLODED ON SITE. >> YOU GUYS AREN'T MESSING WITH ME? 468 00:17:34,697 --> 00:17:35,863 >> YOU GUYS AREN'T MESSING WITH ME? >> NO. 469 00:17:35,865 --> 00:17:39,300 ME? >> NO. >> WHAT WAS HIS NAME? 470 00:17:39,302 --> 00:17:43,437 >> NO. >> WHAT WAS HIS NAME? >> REVEREND BUTT CHEEK P. 471 00:17:43,439 --> 00:17:43,938 >> WHAT WAS HIS NAME? >> REVEREND BUTT CHEEK P. ROSENTHAL. 472 00:17:43,940 --> 00:17:46,841 >> REVEREND BUTT CHEEK P. ROSENTHAL. >> HE WAS SUCH AN AMAZING GUY. 473 00:17:46,843 --> 00:17:49,343 ROSENTHAL. >> HE WAS SUCH AN AMAZING GUY. HE WAS 4'3", AND -- THIS IS 474 00:17:49,345 --> 00:17:52,780 >> HE WAS SUCH AN AMAZING GUY. HE WAS 4'3", AND -- THIS IS GOING TO SOUND IMPROBABLE, BUT 475 00:17:52,782 --> 00:17:53,214 HE WAS 4'3", AND -- THIS IS GOING TO SOUND IMPROBABLE, BUT 1,500 POUNDS. 476 00:17:53,216 --> 00:17:55,649 GOING TO SOUND IMPROBABLE, BUT 1,500 POUNDS. >> HIS DAD'S IN SHOW BUSINESS. 477 00:17:55,651 --> 00:17:56,784 1,500 POUNDS. >> HIS DAD'S IN SHOW BUSINESS. >> WHO WAS HIS DAD? 478 00:17:56,786 --> 00:17:58,752 >> HIS DAD'S IN SHOW BUSINESS. >> WHO WAS HIS DAD? >> CHEF BOYARDEE. 479 00:17:58,754 --> 00:17:59,620 >> WHO WAS HIS DAD? >> CHEF BOYARDEE. >> I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS IS, 480 00:17:59,622 --> 00:18:01,255 >> CHEF BOYARDEE. >> I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS IS, BUT IT'S NOT OKAY TO LIE ABOUT 481 00:18:01,257 --> 00:18:03,290 >> I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS IS, BUT IT'S NOT OKAY TO LIE ABOUT THIS KIND OF STUFF. 482 00:18:03,292 --> 00:18:04,758 BUT IT'S NOT OKAY TO LIE ABOUT THIS KIND OF STUFF. >> IF YOU REALLY DON'T BELIEVE 483 00:18:04,760 --> 00:18:06,227 THIS KIND OF STUFF. >> IF YOU REALLY DON'T BELIEVE US, THERE'S A VIDEO OF THE 484 00:18:06,229 --> 00:18:06,594 >> IF YOU REALLY DON'T BELIEVE US, THERE'S A VIDEO OF THE INCIDENT. 485 00:18:06,596 --> 00:18:09,430 US, THERE'S A VIDEO OF THE INCIDENT. IT'S REALLY HARD TO WATCH. 486 00:18:09,432 --> 00:18:11,799 INCIDENT. IT'S REALLY HARD TO WATCH. >> HEY, GET A VIDEO OF ME WITH 487 00:18:11,801 --> 00:18:13,033 IT'S REALLY HARD TO WATCH. >> HEY, GET A VIDEO OF ME WITH THIS DONKEY. 488 00:18:13,035 --> 00:18:17,304 >> HEY, GET A VIDEO OF ME WITH THIS DONKEY. >> BUTT CHEEK, GET AWAY FROM THE 489 00:18:17,306 --> 00:18:17,605 THIS DONKEY. >> BUTT CHEEK, GET AWAY FROM THE EDGE. 490 00:18:17,607 --> 00:18:19,340 >> BUTT CHEEK, GET AWAY FROM THE EDGE. >> OW, MY NUTS! 491 00:18:19,342 --> 00:18:22,643 EDGE. >> OW, MY NUTS! I'M DOING IT, I'M SHREDDING THE 492 00:18:22,645 --> 00:18:35,689 >> OW, MY NUTS! I'M DOING IT, I'M SHREDDING THE GRAND CANYON! 493 00:18:35,691 --> 00:18:36,123 I'M DOING IT, I'M SHREDDING THE GRAND CANYON! I'M DOING IT! 494 00:18:36,125 --> 00:18:47,601 GRAND CANYON! I'M DOING IT! I'M SHREDDING THE GRAND CANYON! 495 00:18:47,603 --> 00:18:48,202 I'M DOING IT! I'M SHREDDING THE GRAND CANYON! >> YEAH. 496 00:18:48,204 --> 00:18:51,572 I'M SHREDDING THE GRAND CANYON! >> YEAH. >> I'M SO SORRY, YOU GUYS. 497 00:18:51,574 --> 00:18:54,441 >> YEAH. >> I'M SO SORRY, YOU GUYS. SO IT WAS ALL TRUE. 498 00:18:54,443 --> 00:18:54,775 >> I'M SO SORRY, YOU GUYS. SO IT WAS ALL TRUE. >> YEAH. 499 00:18:54,777 --> 00:18:57,778 SO IT WAS ALL TRUE. >> YEAH. >> ALL OF IT. 500 00:18:57,780 --> 00:19:03,617 >> YEAH. >> ALL OF IT. >> MR. BOYARDEE. 501 00:19:03,619 --> 00:19:05,653 >> ALL OF IT. >> MR. BOYARDEE. >> FOR LIFE'S TOUGHEST MOMENTS, 502 00:19:05,655 --> 00:19:07,621 >> MR. BOYARDEE. >> FOR LIFE'S TOUGHEST MOMENTS, CHEF BOYARDEE. 503 00:19:13,795 --> 00:19:18,399 >>> THANK GOD YOU'RE BACK FROM VACATION ROCHELLE. THE CHEER SQUAD WAS A DISASTER 504 00:19:18,401 --> 00:19:18,899 VACATION ROCHELLE. THE CHEER SQUAD WAS A DISASTER WITHOUT YOU. 505 00:19:18,901 --> 00:19:20,167 THE CHEER SQUAD WAS A DISASTER WITHOUT YOU. >> WE WERE TRASH WITHOUT YOU. 506 00:19:20,169 --> 00:19:21,335 WITHOUT YOU. >> WE WERE TRASH WITHOUT YOU. >> I KNOW. 507 00:19:21,337 --> 00:19:22,603 >> WE WERE TRASH WITHOUT YOU. >> I KNOW. SO HOW WAS THE GAME? 508 00:19:22,605 --> 00:19:23,270 >> I KNOW. SO HOW WAS THE GAME? >> OKAY. 509 00:19:23,272 --> 00:19:24,705 SO HOW WAS THE GAME? >> OKAY. WE WERE LOSING BAD, BUT THEN THE 510 00:19:24,707 --> 00:19:26,540 >> OKAY. WE WERE LOSING BAD, BUT THEN THE COACH SUBBED IN A NEW PLAYER, 511 00:19:26,542 --> 00:19:27,741 WE WERE LOSING BAD, BUT THEN THE COACH SUBBED IN A NEW PLAYER, AND HE WAS FIRE. 512 00:19:27,743 --> 00:19:29,276 COACH SUBBED IN A NEW PLAYER, AND HE WAS FIRE. THE OTHER TEAM COMPLAINED, BUT 513 00:19:29,278 --> 00:19:30,911 AND HE WAS FIRE. THE OTHER TEAM COMPLAINED, BUT THERE WAS NO RULES SAYING HE 514 00:19:30,913 --> 00:19:31,378 THE OTHER TEAM COMPLAINED, BUT THERE WAS NO RULES SAYING HE COULDN'T PLAY. 515 00:19:31,380 --> 00:19:33,080 THERE WAS NO RULES SAYING HE COULDN'T PLAY. >> HE TOTALLY TURNED THE GAME 516 00:19:33,082 --> 00:19:33,414 COULDN'T PLAY. >> HE TOTALLY TURNED THE GAME AROUND. 517 00:19:33,416 --> 00:19:35,316 >> HE TOTALLY TURNED THE GAME AROUND. EVERYONE WAS ON THEIR FEET 518 00:19:35,318 --> 00:19:36,784 AROUND. EVERYONE WAS ON THEIR FEET CHEERING, AND HE WAS SO CUTE. 519 00:19:36,786 --> 00:19:38,285 EVERYONE WAS ON THEIR FEET CHEERING, AND HE WAS SO CUTE. >> WAIT, THERE'S A NEW STAR 520 00:19:38,287 --> 00:19:40,487 CHEERING, AND HE WAS SO CUTE. >> WAIT, THERE'S A NEW STAR BASKETBALL PLAYER, AND I'M NOT 521 00:19:40,489 --> 00:19:40,955 >> WAIT, THERE'S A NEW STAR BASKETBALL PLAYER, AND I'M NOT DATING HIM? 522 00:19:40,957 --> 00:19:41,422 BASKETBALL PLAYER, AND I'M NOT DATING HIM? WHAT'S HIS NAME? 523 00:19:41,424 --> 00:19:46,827 DATING HIM? WHAT'S HIS NAME? >> AIR BUD. 524 00:19:46,829 --> 00:19:47,761 WHAT'S HIS NAME? >> AIR BUD. >> STEP ASIDE, LADIES. 525 00:19:47,763 --> 00:19:52,199 >> AIR BUD. >> STEP ASIDE, LADIES. THIS ONE IS MINE. 526 00:19:52,201 --> 00:19:55,836 >> STEP ASIDE, LADIES. THIS ONE IS MINE. >> OH, HEY, WHAT'S UP ROCHELLE? 527 00:19:55,838 --> 00:19:56,170 THIS ONE IS MINE. >> OH, HEY, WHAT'S UP ROCHELLE? >> MOVE. 528 00:19:56,172 --> 00:19:59,773 >> OH, HEY, WHAT'S UP ROCHELLE? >> MOVE. HEY. 529 00:19:59,775 --> 00:20:01,675 >> MOVE. HEY. YOU'RE BUD, RIGHT? 530 00:20:01,677 --> 00:20:04,411 HEY. YOU'RE BUD, RIGHT? I'M ROCHELLE, HEAD CHEERLEADER. 531 00:20:04,413 --> 00:20:09,683 YOU'RE BUD, RIGHT? I'M ROCHELLE, HEAD CHEERLEADER. THAT'S A COOL TONGUE. 532 00:20:09,685 --> 00:20:11,518 I'M ROCHELLE, HEAD CHEERLEADER. THAT'S A COOL TONGUE. GOD, YOU'RE SO HAIRY. 533 00:20:11,520 --> 00:20:11,952 THAT'S A COOL TONGUE. GOD, YOU'RE SO HAIRY. I LOVE THAT. 534 00:20:11,954 --> 00:20:17,992 GOD, YOU'RE SO HAIRY. I LOVE THAT. ARE YOU ITALIAN? 535 00:20:17,994 --> 00:20:19,927 I LOVE THAT. ARE YOU ITALIAN? SO I HEARD YOU HAD QUITE THE 536 00:20:19,929 --> 00:20:20,828 ARE YOU ITALIAN? SO I HEARD YOU HAD QUITE THE GAME ON FRIDAY. 537 00:20:20,830 --> 00:20:22,863 SO I HEARD YOU HAD QUITE THE GAME ON FRIDAY. I'M SO SORRY I MISSED THAT. 538 00:20:22,865 --> 00:20:25,633 GAME ON FRIDAY. I'M SO SORRY I MISSED THAT. I WAS ON VACATION IN THE VIRGIN 539 00:20:25,635 --> 00:20:29,903 I'M SO SORRY I MISSED THAT. I WAS ON VACATION IN THE VIRGIN ISLANDS WEARING A BIKINI. 540 00:20:29,905 --> 00:20:30,504 I WAS ON VACATION IN THE VIRGIN ISLANDS WEARING A BIKINI. SHUT UP! 541 00:20:30,506 --> 00:20:32,706 ISLANDS WEARING A BIKINI. SHUT UP! I'M NOT EVEN THAT TAN! 542 00:20:32,708 --> 00:20:35,542 SHUT UP! I'M NOT EVEN THAT TAN! OH, MY GOD, WAIT, I LOVE YOUR 543 00:20:35,544 --> 00:20:35,909 I'M NOT EVEN THAT TAN! OH, MY GOD, WAIT, I LOVE YOUR NECKLACE. 544 00:20:35,911 --> 00:20:37,678 OH, MY GOD, WAIT, I LOVE YOUR NECKLACE. I AM MICRO CHIPPED. 545 00:20:37,680 --> 00:20:40,214 NECKLACE. I AM MICRO CHIPPED. OH, MY GOD, THAT'S SO BEAUTIFUL. 546 00:20:40,216 --> 00:20:41,348 I AM MICRO CHIPPED. OH, MY GOD, THAT'S SO BEAUTIFUL. I'M INTO POETRY TOO. 547 00:20:41,350 --> 00:20:44,518 OH, MY GOD, THAT'S SO BEAUTIFUL. I'M INTO POETRY TOO. >> HEY, ROCHELLE, HE'S A DOG. 548 00:20:44,520 --> 00:20:47,855 I'M INTO POETRY TOO. >> HEY, ROCHELLE, HE'S A DOG. >> WHATEVER, TYLER. 549 00:20:47,857 --> 00:20:48,555 >> HEY, ROCHELLE, HE'S A DOG. >> WHATEVER, TYLER. YOU HAD YOUR SHOT WITH ME AND 550 00:20:48,557 --> 00:20:49,056 >> WHATEVER, TYLER. YOU HAD YOUR SHOT WITH ME AND YOU BLEW IT. 551 00:20:49,058 --> 00:20:50,824 YOU HAD YOUR SHOT WITH ME AND YOU BLEW IT. I GAVE YOU A CHANCE TO CHANGE 552 00:20:50,826 --> 00:20:55,729 YOU BLEW IT. I GAVE YOU A CHANCE TO CHANGE AND YOU REFUSED. 553 00:20:55,731 --> 00:20:56,730 I GAVE YOU A CHANCE TO CHANGE AND YOU REFUSED. >> HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO GET 554 00:20:56,732 --> 00:20:57,064 AND YOU REFUSED. >> HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO GET TALLER? 555 00:20:57,066 --> 00:20:59,400 >> HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO GET TALLER? >> IF YOU CARED ABOUT ME, YOU 556 00:20:59,402 --> 00:21:01,201 TALLER? >> IF YOU CARED ABOUT ME, YOU WOULD HAVE FIGURED IT OUT. 557 00:21:01,203 --> 00:21:01,935 >> IF YOU CARED ABOUT ME, YOU WOULD HAVE FIGURED IT OUT. >> WHATEVER. 558 00:21:01,937 --> 00:21:04,204 WOULD HAVE FIGURED IT OUT. >> WHATEVER. HEY, BUD, YOU WANT MY SANDWICH? 559 00:21:04,206 --> 00:21:06,073 >> WHATEVER. HEY, BUD, YOU WANT MY SANDWICH? >> SOMEONE IS HUNGRY! 560 00:21:06,075 --> 00:21:07,975 HEY, BUD, YOU WANT MY SANDWICH? >> SOMEONE IS HUNGRY! YOU'RE EATING SO FAST AND JUST 561 00:21:07,977 --> 00:21:10,010 >> SOMEONE IS HUNGRY! YOU'RE EATING SO FAST AND JUST WITH YOUR MOUTH. 562 00:21:10,012 --> 00:21:11,245 YOU'RE EATING SO FAST AND JUST WITH YOUR MOUTH. WAIT, AREN'T YOU EMBARRASSED TO 563 00:21:11,247 --> 00:21:11,979 WITH YOUR MOUTH. WAIT, AREN'T YOU EMBARRASSED TO BE EATING LIKE THAT IN FRONT OF 564 00:21:11,981 --> 00:21:16,016 WAIT, AREN'T YOU EMBARRASSED TO BE EATING LIKE THAT IN FRONT OF A GIRL? 565 00:21:16,018 --> 00:21:16,417 BE EATING LIKE THAT IN FRONT OF A GIRL? I GUESS NOT. 566 00:21:16,419 --> 00:21:17,184 A GIRL? I GUESS NOT. YOU DON'T CARE AT ALL, WHICH OF 567 00:21:17,186 --> 00:21:19,787 I GUESS NOT. YOU DON'T CARE AT ALL, WHICH OF COURSE ONLY MAKES YOU HOTTER. 568 00:21:19,789 --> 00:21:23,057 YOU DON'T CARE AT ALL, WHICH OF COURSE ONLY MAKES YOU HOTTER. >> ROCHELLE, ARE YOU SO BLINDED 569 00:21:23,059 --> 00:21:25,325 COURSE ONLY MAKES YOU HOTTER. >> ROCHELLE, ARE YOU SO BLINDED BY THE NEED TO BE POPULAR, YOU 570 00:21:25,327 --> 00:21:26,994 >> ROCHELLE, ARE YOU SO BLINDED BY THE NEED TO BE POPULAR, YOU CAN'T TELL THAT THAT'S A DOG? 571 00:21:26,996 --> 00:21:28,228 BY THE NEED TO BE POPULAR, YOU CAN'T TELL THAT THAT'S A DOG? >> WHATEVER, TRENT. 572 00:21:28,230 --> 00:21:29,830 CAN'T TELL THAT THAT'S A DOG? >> WHATEVER, TRENT. YOU HAD YOUR SHOT WITH ME AND 573 00:21:29,832 --> 00:21:30,597 >> WHATEVER, TRENT. YOU HAD YOUR SHOT WITH ME AND YOU BLEW IT. 574 00:21:30,599 --> 00:21:32,399 YOU HAD YOUR SHOT WITH ME AND YOU BLEW IT. YOU COULDN'T BE WHAT I NEEDED 575 00:21:32,401 --> 00:21:32,800 YOU BLEW IT. YOU COULDN'T BE WHAT I NEEDED YOU TO BE. 576 00:21:32,802 --> 00:21:35,069 YOU COULDN'T BE WHAT I NEEDED YOU TO BE. >> I'M SORRY MY FAMILY ISN'T 577 00:21:35,071 --> 00:21:35,369 YOU TO BE. >> I'M SORRY MY FAMILY ISN'T RICH. 578 00:21:35,371 --> 00:21:36,136 >> I'M SORRY MY FAMILY ISN'T RICH. >> SO WAS I. 579 00:21:36,138 --> 00:21:38,138 RICH. >> SO WAS I. >> HEY, BUD, READY FOR YOUR 580 00:21:38,140 --> 00:21:38,572 >> SO WAS I. >> HEY, BUD, READY FOR YOUR WALK? 581 00:21:38,574 --> 00:21:42,076 >> HEY, BUD, READY FOR YOUR WALK? I GOT YOUR LITTLE GIRLFRIEND 582 00:21:42,078 --> 00:21:42,443 WALK? I GOT YOUR LITTLE GIRLFRIEND OUTSIDE. 583 00:21:42,445 --> 00:21:47,014 I GOT YOUR LITTLE GIRLFRIEND OUTSIDE. >> WAIT, YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND? 584 00:21:47,016 --> 00:21:49,950 OUTSIDE. >> WAIT, YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND? WERE YOU EVER GONNA TELL ME 585 00:21:49,952 --> 00:21:50,818 >> WAIT, YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND? WERE YOU EVER GONNA TELL ME ABOUT HER? 586 00:21:50,820 --> 00:21:52,186 WERE YOU EVER GONNA TELL ME ABOUT HER? ARE YOU JUST GOING TO SIT THERE 587 00:21:52,188 --> 00:21:53,353 ABOUT HER? ARE YOU JUST GOING TO SIT THERE AND LET ME THROW MYSELF AT YOU 588 00:21:53,355 --> 00:21:56,256 ARE YOU JUST GOING TO SIT THERE AND LET ME THROW MYSELF AT YOU LIKE AN IDIOT? 589 00:21:56,258 --> 00:21:57,891 AND LET ME THROW MYSELF AT YOU LIKE AN IDIOT? OH, SO NOW YOU'RE NOT GOING TO 590 00:21:57,893 --> 00:21:59,226 LIKE AN IDIOT? OH, SO NOW YOU'RE NOT GOING TO TALK TO ME? 591 00:21:59,228 --> 00:21:59,526 OH, SO NOW YOU'RE NOT GOING TO TALK TO ME? FINE. 592 00:21:59,528 --> 00:22:01,395 TALK TO ME? FINE. I HOPE YOU AND THAT SLUT ARE 593 00:22:01,397 --> 00:22:02,696 FINE. I HOPE YOU AND THAT SLUT ARE HAPPY BY THE WAY. 594 00:22:02,698 --> 00:22:06,433 I HOPE YOU AND THAT SLUT ARE HAPPY BY THE WAY. I HEARD SHE EATS GRASS, BARFS, 595 00:22:06,435 --> 00:22:08,802 HAPPY BY THE WAY. I HEARD SHE EATS GRASS, BARFS, AND THEN EATS HER OWN BARF. 596 00:22:08,804 --> 00:22:09,803 I HEARD SHE EATS GRASS, BARFS, AND THEN EATS HER OWN BARF. YOU KNOW, I'VE NEVER DONE ANY OF 597 00:22:09,805 --> 00:22:13,607 AND THEN EATS HER OWN BARF. YOU KNOW, I'VE NEVER DONE ANY OF THOSE THINGS. 598 00:22:13,609 --> 00:22:17,177 YOU KNOW, I'VE NEVER DONE ANY OF THOSE THINGS. JUST SO YOU KNOW, I'M NOT STRICT 599 00:22:17,179 --> 00:22:18,078 THOSE THINGS. JUST SO YOU KNOW, I'M NOT STRICT ABOUT CONDOMS. 600 00:22:18,080 --> 00:22:20,280 JUST SO YOU KNOW, I'M NOT STRICT ABOUT CONDOMS. IF YOU DON'T HAVE ONE, I'LL JUST 601 00:22:20,282 --> 00:22:23,217 ABOUT CONDOMS. IF YOU DON'T HAVE ONE, I'LL JUST SAY, BE CAREFUL, K, AND STILL GO 602 00:22:23,219 --> 00:22:24,485 IF YOU DON'T HAVE ONE, I'LL JUST SAY, BE CAREFUL, K, AND STILL GO ALONG WITH IT. 603 00:22:24,487 --> 00:22:26,353 SAY, BE CAREFUL, K, AND STILL GO ALONG WITH IT. NOT THAT YOU'LL EVER BENEFIT 604 00:22:26,355 --> 00:22:26,720 ALONG WITH IT. NOT THAT YOU'LL EVER BENEFIT FROM IT. 605 00:22:26,722 --> 00:22:27,855 NOT THAT YOU'LL EVER BENEFIT FROM IT. >> ROCHELLE, HE'S A DOG. 606 00:22:27,857 --> 00:22:28,489 FROM IT. >> ROCHELLE, HE'S A DOG. >> YOU CAN SAY THAT AGAIN. 607 00:22:28,491 --> 00:22:31,592 >> ROCHELLE, HE'S A DOG. >> YOU CAN SAY THAT AGAIN. BYE, BUD. 608 00:22:31,594 --> 00:22:32,559 >> YOU CAN SAY THAT AGAIN. BYE, BUD. >> WOW. 609 00:22:32,561 --> 00:22:36,630 BYE, BUD. >> WOW. I'VE NEVER SEEN ROCHELLE GET 610 00:22:36,632 --> 00:22:36,964 >> WOW. I'VE NEVER SEEN ROCHELLE GET JEALOUS. 611 00:22:36,966 --> 00:22:38,766 I'VE NEVER SEEN ROCHELLE GET JEALOUS. HEY, I'M CANDICE. 612 00:22:38,768 --> 00:22:41,034 JEALOUS. HEY, I'M CANDICE. AND JUST SO YOU KNOW, I AM 613 00:22:41,036 --> 00:22:42,369 HEY, I'M CANDICE. AND JUST SO YOU KNOW, I AM STRICT ABOUT CONDOMS. 614 00:22:42,371 --> 00:22:48,575 AND JUST SO YOU KNOW, I AM STRICT ABOUT CONDOMS. I NEVER LET GUYS WEAR ONE. 615 00:23:17,405 --> 00:23:25,078 >>> IN JUDGE KARLOTTA'S COURT, IF YOU DON'T FESS UP, YOU'RE GOING TO GET MESSED UP. 616 00:23:25,080 --> 00:23:26,780 IF YOU DON'T FESS UP, YOU'RE GOING TO GET MESSED UP. AND THE ONLY THING TOUGHER THAN 617 00:23:26,782 --> 00:23:29,049 GOING TO GET MESSED UP. AND THE ONLY THING TOUGHER THAN ONE JUDGE ON THE CASE IS THREE. 618 00:23:29,051 --> 00:23:32,085 AND THE ONLY THING TOUGHER THAN ONE JUDGE ON THE CASE IS THREE. AND THE ONLY THING TOUGHER THAN 619 00:23:32,087 --> 00:23:33,120 ONE JUDGE ON THE CASE IS THREE. AND THE ONLY THING TOUGHER THAN THREE JUDGES IS TEN. 620 00:23:33,122 --> 00:23:35,455 AND THE ONLY THING TOUGHER THAN THREE JUDGES IS TEN. BUT WHY STOP AT TEN WHEN YOU CAN 621 00:23:35,457 --> 00:23:36,190 THREE JUDGES IS TEN. BUT WHY STOP AT TEN WHEN YOU CAN HAVE 17? 622 00:23:36,192 --> 00:23:38,358 BUT WHY STOP AT TEN WHEN YOU CAN HAVE 17? YOU'RE WATCHING BIG BENCH. 623 00:23:38,360 --> 00:23:39,259 HAVE 17? YOU'RE WATCHING BIG BENCH. >> ALL RISE FOR THE HONORABLE 624 00:23:39,261 --> 00:23:42,830 YOU'RE WATCHING BIG BENCH. >> ALL RISE FOR THE HONORABLE EVERYBODY. 625 00:23:42,832 --> 00:23:43,430 >> ALL RISE FOR THE HONORABLE EVERYBODY. >> THANK YOU, BAILIFF. 626 00:23:43,432 --> 00:23:49,636 EVERYBODY. >> THANK YOU, BAILIFF. COURT IS NOW IN SESSION. 627 00:23:49,638 --> 00:23:49,937 >> THANK YOU, BAILIFF. COURT IS NOW IN SESSION. OKAY. 628 00:23:49,939 --> 00:23:50,237 COURT IS NOW IN SESSION. OKAY. OKAY. 629 00:23:50,239 --> 00:23:52,639 OKAY. OKAY. HEY, WE DON'T ALL NEED TO BANG 630 00:23:52,641 --> 00:23:53,307 OKAY. HEY, WE DON'T ALL NEED TO BANG OUR GAVELS. 631 00:23:53,309 --> 00:23:54,074 HEY, WE DON'T ALL NEED TO BANG OUR GAVELS. THEY HEAR IT. 632 00:23:54,076 --> 00:23:55,909 OUR GAVELS. THEY HEAR IT. WE GOT A LOT OF CASES AND EVEN 633 00:23:55,911 --> 00:23:56,777 THEY HEAR IT. WE GOT A LOT OF CASES AND EVEN MORE JUDGES. 634 00:23:56,779 --> 00:24:00,347 WE GOT A LOT OF CASES AND EVEN MORE JUDGES. SO LET'S START. 635 00:24:00,349 --> 00:24:02,649 MORE JUDGES. SO LET'S START. PLAINTIFF, PLEASE STATE YOUR 636 00:24:02,651 --> 00:24:02,950 SO LET'S START. PLAINTIFF, PLEASE STATE YOUR NAME. 637 00:24:02,952 --> 00:24:03,884 PLAINTIFF, PLEASE STATE YOUR NAME. >> THANK YOU, YOUR HONOR. 638 00:24:03,886 --> 00:24:06,420 NAME. >> THANK YOU, YOUR HONOR. MY NAME IS ASHLEY JOURNS AND I'M 639 00:24:06,422 --> 00:24:08,388 >> THANK YOU, YOUR HONOR. MY NAME IS ASHLEY JOURNS AND I'M HERE TO SAY ONE THING AND ONE 640 00:24:08,390 --> 00:24:09,857 MY NAME IS ASHLEY JOURNS AND I'M HERE TO SAY ONE THING AND ONE THING ONLY, THAT MAN IS A THIEF. 641 00:24:09,859 --> 00:24:12,326 HERE TO SAY ONE THING AND ONE THING ONLY, THAT MAN IS A THIEF. >> WHY WOULD I STEAL FROM HER? 642 00:24:12,328 --> 00:24:14,928 THING ONLY, THAT MAN IS A THIEF. >> WHY WOULD I STEAL FROM HER? SHE'S BROKE AS HELL. 643 00:24:14,930 --> 00:24:15,829 >> WHY WOULD I STEAL FROM HER? SHE'S BROKE AS HELL. >> HEY, THIS IS NOT A CIRCUS. 644 00:24:15,831 --> 00:24:17,698 SHE'S BROKE AS HELL. >> HEY, THIS IS NOT A CIRCUS. THIS IS A 17-JUDGE COURTROOM. 645 00:24:17,700 --> 00:24:17,998 >> HEY, THIS IS NOT A CIRCUS. THIS IS A 17-JUDGE COURTROOM. OKAY? 646 00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:19,199 THIS IS A 17-JUDGE COURTROOM. OKAY? AND IF YOU WANT TO WIN TODAY, 647 00:24:19,201 --> 00:24:20,934 OKAY? AND IF YOU WANT TO WIN TODAY, YOU GOT TO GET A UNANIMOUS 648 00:24:20,936 --> 00:24:24,805 AND IF YOU WANT TO WIN TODAY, YOU GOT TO GET A UNANIMOUS DECISION FROM EVERY JUDGE UP 649 00:24:24,807 --> 00:24:25,105 YOU GOT TO GET A UNANIMOUS DECISION FROM EVERY JUDGE UP HERE. 650 00:24:25,107 --> 00:24:28,575 DECISION FROM EVERY JUDGE UP HERE. I'M JUDGE CARLOTTA. 651 00:24:28,577 --> 00:24:33,580 HERE. I'M JUDGE CARLOTTA. JUDGE TONKIN IS THE CRANKY ONE. 652 00:24:33,582 --> 00:24:35,482 I'M JUDGE CARLOTTA. JUDGE TONKIN IS THE CRANKY ONE. >> I DON'T GOT TIME FOR THIS. 653 00:24:35,484 --> 00:24:36,884 JUDGE TONKIN IS THE CRANKY ONE. >> I DON'T GOT TIME FOR THIS. >> JUDGE HUNK IS THE CUTE ONE. 654 00:24:36,886 --> 00:24:38,619 >> I DON'T GOT TIME FOR THIS. >> JUDGE HUNK IS THE CUTE ONE. >> I AM? 655 00:24:38,621 --> 00:24:38,919 >> JUDGE HUNK IS THE CUTE ONE. >> I AM? GOSH. 656 00:24:38,921 --> 00:24:39,653 >> I AM? GOSH. >> JUDGE ALEJANDRO IS CUTE AND 657 00:24:39,655 --> 00:24:49,496 GOSH. >> JUDGE ALEJANDRO IS CUTE AND LATIN. 658 00:24:49,498 --> 00:24:50,130 >> JUDGE ALEJANDRO IS CUTE AND LATIN. >> [ SPEAKING SPANISH ]. 659 00:24:50,132 --> 00:24:52,065 LATIN. >> [ SPEAKING SPANISH ]. >> AND JUDGE BEN, WELL, HE'S 660 00:24:52,067 --> 00:24:52,366 >> [ SPEAKING SPANISH ]. >> AND JUDGE BEN, WELL, HE'S GAY. 661 00:24:52,368 --> 00:24:55,335 >> AND JUDGE BEN, WELL, HE'S GAY. >> IMAGINE THAT, A GAY JUDGE. 662 00:24:55,337 --> 00:24:56,370 GAY. >> IMAGINE THAT, A GAY JUDGE. >> EXACTLY. 663 00:24:56,372 --> 00:24:59,773 >> IMAGINE THAT, A GAY JUDGE. >> EXACTLY. NOW LET'S GET ON WITH IT. 664 00:24:59,775 --> 00:25:00,941 >> EXACTLY. NOW LET'S GET ON WITH IT. MS. JOURNS, YOU SAID THIS MAN 665 00:25:00,943 --> 00:25:02,209 NOW LET'S GET ON WITH IT. MS. JOURNS, YOU SAID THIS MAN STOLE SOMETHING FROM YOU. 666 00:25:02,211 --> 00:25:04,444 MS. JOURNS, YOU SAID THIS MAN STOLE SOMETHING FROM YOU. WHAT DID HE STEAL? 667 00:25:04,446 --> 00:25:06,179 STOLE SOMETHING FROM YOU. WHAT DID HE STEAL? >> MY HEART, MY CAR, AND MY 668 00:25:06,181 --> 00:25:09,783 WHAT DID HE STEAL? >> MY HEART, MY CAR, AND MY DISCOVERY CARD, BUT MOSTLY MY 669 00:25:09,785 --> 00:25:10,117 >> MY HEART, MY CAR, AND MY DISCOVERY CARD, BUT MOSTLY MY HEART. 670 00:25:10,119 --> 00:25:10,450 DISCOVERY CARD, BUT MOSTLY MY HEART. >> OKAY. 671 00:25:10,452 --> 00:25:10,751 HEART. >> OKAY. OKAY. 672 00:25:10,753 --> 00:25:11,218 >> OKAY. OKAY. THIS IS JUICY. 673 00:25:11,220 --> 00:25:13,153 OKAY. THIS IS JUICY. NOW YOU GOT MY ATTENTION. 674 00:25:13,155 --> 00:25:15,188 THIS IS JUICY. NOW YOU GOT MY ATTENTION. >> WHAT CAN I SAY, YOUR HONOR, 675 00:25:15,190 --> 00:25:16,957 NOW YOU GOT MY ATTENTION. >> WHAT CAN I SAY, YOUR HONOR, I'M A BAD BOY. 676 00:25:16,959 --> 00:25:23,964 >> WHAT CAN I SAY, YOUR HONOR, I'M A BAD BOY. >> OKAY, MR. PALEST ARMS ON 677 00:25:23,966 --> 00:25:24,264 I'M A BAD BOY. >> OKAY, MR. PALEST ARMS ON EARTH. 678 00:25:24,266 --> 00:25:27,334 >> OKAY, MR. PALEST ARMS ON EARTH. LET US BE THE JUDGE OF THAT. 679 00:25:27,336 --> 00:25:28,435 EARTH. LET US BE THE JUDGE OF THAT. >> PLUS HER CAR IS WHACK AND HER 680 00:25:28,437 --> 00:25:29,870 LET US BE THE JUDGE OF THAT. >> PLUS HER CAR IS WHACK AND HER DISCOVER CARD IS MAXED. 681 00:25:29,872 --> 00:25:32,673 >> PLUS HER CAR IS WHACK AND HER DISCOVER CARD IS MAXED. THIS IS VERY UNFAIR. 682 00:25:32,675 --> 00:25:34,608 DISCOVER CARD IS MAXED. THIS IS VERY UNFAIR. >> WHATEVER INJUSTICE YOU MAY 683 00:25:34,610 --> 00:25:36,510 THIS IS VERY UNFAIR. >> WHATEVER INJUSTICE YOU MAY FEEL THINK ABOUT WHAT I'VE GONE 684 00:25:36,512 --> 00:25:38,045 >> WHATEVER INJUSTICE YOU MAY FEEL THINK ABOUT WHAT I'VE GONE THROUGH AS A JUDGE WHO IS ALSO A 685 00:25:38,047 --> 00:25:38,612 FEEL THINK ABOUT WHAT I'VE GONE THROUGH AS A JUDGE WHO IS ALSO A GAY MAN. 686 00:25:38,614 --> 00:25:39,713 THROUGH AS A JUDGE WHO IS ALSO A GAY MAN. >> YOU'RE FINE. 687 00:25:39,715 --> 00:25:41,281 GAY MAN. >> YOU'RE FINE. SO MS. JOURNS, WHERE DID YOU 688 00:25:41,283 --> 00:25:42,349 >> YOU'RE FINE. SO MS. JOURNS, WHERE DID YOU MEET THIS MAN? 689 00:25:42,351 --> 00:25:45,519 SO MS. JOURNS, WHERE DID YOU MEET THIS MAN? >> I MET HIM AT MY SISTER'S 690 00:25:45,521 --> 00:25:48,588 MEET THIS MAN? >> I MET HIM AT MY SISTER'S WEDDING WHERE HE WAS MARRYING MY 691 00:25:48,590 --> 00:25:48,922 >> I MET HIM AT MY SISTER'S WEDDING WHERE HE WAS MARRYING MY SISTER. 692 00:25:48,924 --> 00:25:49,890 WEDDING WHERE HE WAS MARRYING MY SISTER. >> THIS IS JUICY AS HELL. 693 00:25:49,892 --> 00:25:51,391 SISTER. >> THIS IS JUICY AS HELL. HOW DOES YOUR SISTER FEEL ABOUT 694 00:25:51,393 --> 00:25:51,925 >> THIS IS JUICY AS HELL. HOW DOES YOUR SISTER FEEL ABOUT THAT? 695 00:25:51,927 --> 00:25:54,194 HOW DOES YOUR SISTER FEEL ABOUT THAT? >> ASK HER YOURSELF. 696 00:25:54,196 --> 00:25:56,396 THAT? >> ASK HER YOURSELF. I BROUGHT HER WITH ME TODAY. 697 00:25:56,398 --> 00:25:58,265 >> ASK HER YOURSELF. I BROUGHT HER WITH ME TODAY. >> I TOLD HER TO GO FOR IT. 698 00:25:58,267 --> 00:26:01,101 I BROUGHT HER WITH ME TODAY. >> I TOLD HER TO GO FOR IT. I JUST WANTED HIS ASS OUT OF THE 699 00:26:01,103 --> 00:26:01,435 >> I TOLD HER TO GO FOR IT. I JUST WANTED HIS ASS OUT OF THE HOUSE. 700 00:26:01,437 --> 00:26:02,636 I JUST WANTED HIS ASS OUT OF THE HOUSE. >> HANG ON. 701 00:26:02,638 --> 00:26:04,237 HOUSE. >> HANG ON. MA'AM, YOU CANNOT SMOKE IN HERE. 702 00:26:04,239 --> 00:26:08,675 >> HANG ON. MA'AM, YOU CANNOT SMOKE IN HERE. >> OH, I'M SO SORRY. 703 00:26:08,677 --> 00:26:09,076 MA'AM, YOU CANNOT SMOKE IN HERE. >> OH, I'M SO SORRY. >> OKAY. 704 00:26:09,078 --> 00:26:11,211 >> OH, I'M SO SORRY. >> OKAY. THESE PEOPLE ARE THE CRAZIEST 705 00:26:11,213 --> 00:26:12,779 >> OKAY. THESE PEOPLE ARE THE CRAZIEST PEOPLE I'VE EVER SEEN, BUT I GOT 706 00:26:12,781 --> 00:26:14,781 THESE PEOPLE ARE THE CRAZIEST PEOPLE I'VE EVER SEEN, BUT I GOT TO INTRODUCE SOME MORE JUDGES. 707 00:26:14,783 --> 00:26:17,351 PEOPLE I'VE EVER SEEN, BUT I GOT TO INTRODUCE SOME MORE JUDGES. JUST BELOW ME IS JUDGE SHINER, 708 00:26:17,353 --> 00:26:20,954 TO INTRODUCE SOME MORE JUDGES. JUST BELOW ME IS JUDGE SHINER, OUR SWEET SIMPLE PERVERT. 709 00:26:20,956 --> 00:26:22,789 JUST BELOW ME IS JUDGE SHINER, OUR SWEET SIMPLE PERVERT. >> MAYBE EVERYBODY SHOULD JUST 710 00:26:22,791 --> 00:26:23,090 OUR SWEET SIMPLE PERVERT. >> MAYBE EVERYBODY SHOULD JUST KISS. 711 00:26:23,092 --> 00:26:26,460 >> MAYBE EVERYBODY SHOULD JUST KISS. >> NEXT TO HIM IS JUDGE TOOTIE, 712 00:26:26,462 --> 00:26:28,528 KISS. >> NEXT TO HIM IS JUDGE TOOTIE, WHO WE HAD TO HIRE BECAUSE SHE'S 713 00:26:28,530 --> 00:26:30,597 >> NEXT TO HIM IS JUDGE TOOTIE, WHO WE HAD TO HIRE BECAUSE SHE'S JUDGE JUDY'S NIECE. 714 00:26:30,599 --> 00:26:32,799 WHO WE HAD TO HIRE BECAUSE SHE'S JUDGE JUDY'S NIECE. >> HEY, DON'T TALK TO ME LIKE 715 00:26:32,801 --> 00:26:33,100 JUDGE JUDY'S NIECE. >> HEY, DON'T TALK TO ME LIKE THAT. 716 00:26:33,102 --> 00:26:34,501 >> HEY, DON'T TALK TO ME LIKE THAT. DO YOU KNOW WHO MY AUNT IS? 717 00:26:34,503 --> 00:26:36,470 THAT. DO YOU KNOW WHO MY AUNT IS? >> AND THAT'S JUDGE WANDA WHO 718 00:26:36,472 --> 00:26:38,438 DO YOU KNOW WHO MY AUNT IS? >> AND THAT'S JUDGE WANDA WHO GOT HIT ON THE HEAD AND NOW 719 00:26:38,440 --> 00:26:40,374 >> AND THAT'S JUDGE WANDA WHO GOT HIT ON THE HEAD AND NOW THINKS SHE'S ON SHARK TANK. 720 00:26:40,376 --> 00:26:42,409 GOT HIT ON THE HEAD AND NOW THINKS SHE'S ON SHARK TANK. >> THE MARKET DOESN'T NEED 721 00:26:42,411 --> 00:26:43,910 THINKS SHE'S ON SHARK TANK. >> THE MARKET DOESN'T NEED ANOTHER HARD SELTZER, AND FOR 722 00:26:43,912 --> 00:26:45,212 >> THE MARKET DOESN'T NEED ANOTHER HARD SELTZER, AND FOR THAT REASON, I'M OUT. 723 00:26:45,214 --> 00:26:47,948 ANOTHER HARD SELTZER, AND FOR THAT REASON, I'M OUT. >> DID I MENTION JUDGE BEN IS 724 00:26:47,950 --> 00:26:48,248 THAT REASON, I'M OUT. >> DID I MENTION JUDGE BEN IS GAY? 725 00:26:48,250 --> 00:26:49,549 >> DID I MENTION JUDGE BEN IS GAY? >> A GAY JUDGE? 726 00:26:49,551 --> 00:26:51,385 GAY? >> A GAY JUDGE? WHAT'S NEXT, A DOG JUDGE? 727 00:26:51,387 --> 00:26:53,954 >> A GAY JUDGE? WHAT'S NEXT, A DOG JUDGE? >> WHY, YES, THAT IS NEXT. 728 00:26:53,956 --> 00:26:57,290 WHAT'S NEXT, A DOG JUDGE? >> WHY, YES, THAT IS NEXT. HOW YOU DOING, JUDGE WOOF? 729 00:26:57,292 --> 00:26:57,824 >> WHY, YES, THAT IS NEXT. HOW YOU DOING, JUDGE WOOF? ALL RIGHT. 730 00:26:57,826 --> 00:27:01,495 HOW YOU DOING, JUDGE WOOF? ALL RIGHT. MS. JOURNS, WE'RE READY FOR YOUR 731 00:27:01,497 --> 00:27:02,029 ALL RIGHT. MS. JOURNS, WE'RE READY FOR YOUR FINAL STATEMENT. 732 00:27:02,031 --> 00:27:03,063 MS. JOURNS, WE'RE READY FOR YOUR FINAL STATEMENT. >> WOW. 733 00:27:03,065 --> 00:27:04,865 FINAL STATEMENT. >> WOW. WHAT JUDGE WOOF JUST SAID JUST 734 00:27:04,867 --> 00:27:05,699 >> WOW. WHAT JUDGE WOOF JUST SAID JUST STRUCK ME DEEP. 735 00:27:05,701 --> 00:27:07,834 WHAT JUDGE WOOF JUST SAID JUST STRUCK ME DEEP. I REALIZED NOBODY'S PERFECT. 736 00:27:07,836 --> 00:27:09,736 STRUCK ME DEEP. I REALIZED NOBODY'S PERFECT. NOT EVEN ME. 737 00:27:09,738 --> 00:27:11,571 I REALIZED NOBODY'S PERFECT. NOT EVEN ME. I'M GOING TO DROP THE CASE. 738 00:27:11,573 --> 00:27:13,807 NOT EVEN ME. I'M GOING TO DROP THE CASE. >> WELL, THAT'S MAYBE THE NICEST 739 00:27:13,809 --> 00:27:15,075 I'M GOING TO DROP THE CASE. >> WELL, THAT'S MAYBE THE NICEST THING ANYONE'S EVER DONE FOR ME. 740 00:27:15,077 --> 00:27:17,310 >> WELL, THAT'S MAYBE THE NICEST THING ANYONE'S EVER DONE FOR ME. >> NOW KISS? 741 00:27:17,312 --> 00:27:18,779 THING ANYONE'S EVER DONE FOR ME. >> NOW KISS? >> NO, NO, NO. 742 00:27:18,781 --> 00:27:19,679 >> NOW KISS? >> NO, NO, NO. I THINK WE'RE READY TO RULE. 743 00:27:19,681 --> 00:27:22,149 >> NO, NO, NO. I THINK WE'RE READY TO RULE. >> GUILTY. 744 00:27:22,151 --> 00:27:27,587 I THINK WE'RE READY TO RULE. >> GUILTY. >> GUILTY. 745 00:27:27,589 --> 00:27:29,856 >> GUILTY. >> GUILTY. >> CHIPOTLE. 746 00:27:29,858 --> 00:27:31,391 >> GUILTY. >> CHIPOTLE. >> PANERA. 747 00:27:31,393 --> 00:27:32,092 >> CHIPOTLE. >> PANERA. >> OKAY. 748 00:27:32,094 --> 00:27:35,362 >> PANERA. >> OKAY. I THINK WE ORDERING LUNCH NOW. 749 00:27:35,364 --> 00:27:40,567 >> OKAY. I THINK WE ORDERING LUNCH NOW. >> HAMBURGER MARY'S. 750 00:27:40,569 --> 00:27:44,071 I THINK WE ORDERING LUNCH NOW. >> HAMBURGER MARY'S. >> AND PANERA IT IS. 751 00:27:44,073 --> 00:27:45,005 >> HAMBURGER MARY'S. >> AND PANERA IT IS. NOW WE END THE SHOW LIKE WE 752 00:27:45,007 --> 00:27:48,175 >> AND PANERA IT IS. NOW WE END THE SHOW LIKE WE ALWAYS DO, WITH THE WAVE. 753 00:27:48,177 --> 00:27:51,344 NOW WE END THE SHOW LIKE WE ALWAYS DO, WITH THE WAVE. >> WHOO! 754 00:27:51,346 --> 00:27:52,779 ALWAYS DO, WITH THE WAVE. >> WHOO! >> COURT'S DISMISSED. 755 00:27:52,781 --> 00:27:54,448 >> WHOO! >> COURT'S DISMISSED. GO ON AND SHOW THE LOGO. 756 00:27:54,450 --> 00:27:57,517 >> COURT'S DISMISSED. GO ON AND SHOW THE LOGO. >> BIG BENCH. 757 00:28:03,491 --> 00:28:07,227 >>> OKAY. CAN I TELL YOU GUYS SOMETHING SUPER EMBARRASSING? 758 00:28:07,229 --> 00:28:09,763 CAN I TELL YOU GUYS SOMETHING SUPER EMBARRASSING? I HAVE LIKE AN ITSY BITSY CRUSH 759 00:28:09,765 --> 00:28:10,797 SUPER EMBARRASSING? I HAVE LIKE AN ITSY BITSY CRUSH ON SOMEONE HERE I THINK. 760 00:28:10,799 --> 00:28:11,965 I HAVE LIKE AN ITSY BITSY CRUSH ON SOMEONE HERE I THINK. >> WHAT? 761 00:28:11,967 --> 00:28:13,767 ON SOMEONE HERE I THINK. >> WHAT? >> WHO? 762 00:28:13,769 --> 00:28:15,135 >> WHAT? >> WHO? LENNY PICKET? 763 00:28:15,137 --> 00:28:17,003 >> WHO? LENNY PICKET? >> NO. 764 00:28:17,005 --> 00:28:17,337 LENNY PICKET? >> NO. BOWEN. 765 00:28:17,339 --> 00:28:19,739 >> NO. BOWEN. >> LIKE, BOYGENIUS, Y'ALL ARE 766 00:28:19,741 --> 00:28:21,108 BOWEN. >> LIKE, BOYGENIUS, Y'ALL ARE GIVING GIRL DUMB ASS. 767 00:28:21,110 --> 00:28:23,944 >> LIKE, BOYGENIUS, Y'ALL ARE GIVING GIRL DUMB ASS. >> HE'S SO FUNNY AND HE'S SWEET. 768 00:28:23,946 --> 00:28:25,412 GIVING GIRL DUMB ASS. >> HE'S SO FUNNY AND HE'S SWEET. OBVIOUSLY IT CAN'T BE ANYTHING. 769 00:28:25,414 --> 00:28:26,413 >> HE'S SO FUNNY AND HE'S SWEET. OBVIOUSLY IT CAN'T BE ANYTHING. >> GIRL, YOU SHOULD ABSOLUTELY 770 00:28:26,415 --> 00:28:27,547 OBVIOUSLY IT CAN'T BE ANYTHING. >> GIRL, YOU SHOULD ABSOLUTELY GO FOR IT. 771 00:28:27,549 --> 00:28:30,217 >> GIRL, YOU SHOULD ABSOLUTELY GO FOR IT. >> BUT ISN'T HE -- ISN'T HE GAY? 772 00:28:30,219 --> 00:28:31,251 GO FOR IT. >> BUT ISN'T HE -- ISN'T HE GAY? >> GAY? 773 00:28:31,253 --> 00:28:32,219 >> BUT ISN'T HE -- ISN'T HE GAY? >> GAY? NO, BOWEN'S STRAIGHT. 774 00:28:32,221 --> 00:28:35,455 >> GAY? NO, BOWEN'S STRAIGHT. >> YEAH, STRAIGHT AS THEY 775 00:28:35,457 --> 00:28:37,124 NO, BOWEN'S STRAIGHT. >> YEAH, STRAIGHT AS THEY BOWEN JUST PLAYS GAY ON THE SHOW 776 00:28:37,126 --> 00:28:39,726 >> YEAH, STRAIGHT AS THEY BOWEN JUST PLAYS GAY ON THE SHOW BECAUSE IT'S A SHORT CUT TO 777 00:28:39,728 --> 00:28:40,060 BOWEN JUST PLAYS GAY ON THE SHOW BECAUSE IT'S A SHORT CUT TO LAUGHS. 778 00:28:40,062 --> 00:28:43,163 BECAUSE IT'S A SHORT CUT TO LAUGHS. >> SO HE HOOKS UP WITH GIRLS? 779 00:28:43,165 --> 00:28:45,866 LAUGHS. >> SO HE HOOKS UP WITH GIRLS? >> OH, YEAH, HOT GIRLS TOO. 780 00:28:45,868 --> 00:28:48,902 >> SO HE HOOKS UP WITH GIRLS? >> OH, YEAH, HOT GIRLS TOO. BOWEN PULLS. 781 00:28:48,904 --> 00:28:49,402 >> OH, YEAH, HOT GIRLS TOO. BOWEN PULLS. >> I HAD NO IDEA. 782 00:28:49,404 --> 00:29:02,816 BOWEN PULLS. >> I HAD NO IDEA. >> HEY, HEY. 783 00:29:02,818 --> 00:29:05,452 >> I HAD NO IDEA. >> HEY, HEY. >> BABY, I'VE MISSED YOU SO 784 00:29:05,454 --> 00:29:05,752 >> HEY, HEY. >> BABY, I'VE MISSED YOU SO MUCH. 785 00:29:05,754 --> 00:29:07,487 >> BABY, I'VE MISSED YOU SO MUCH. >> GINA, WHEN I'M AT WORK, GOT 786 00:29:07,489 --> 00:29:09,489 MUCH. >> GINA, WHEN I'M AT WORK, GOT TO CUT OUT THE BABE STUFF. 787 00:29:09,491 --> 00:29:13,493 >> GINA, WHEN I'M AT WORK, GOT TO CUT OUT THE BABE STUFF. >> IS THAT GINA GERSHON? 788 00:29:13,495 --> 00:29:17,998 TO CUT OUT THE BABE STUFF. >> IS THAT GINA GERSHON? >> ANYWAY, THE IDEA IS SYDNEY 789 00:29:18,000 --> 00:29:21,568 >> IS THAT GINA GERSHON? >> ANYWAY, THE IDEA IS SYDNEY SWEENEY TODD, THE TALE OF SYDNEY 790 00:29:21,570 --> 00:29:22,169 >> ANYWAY, THE IDEA IS SYDNEY SWEENEY TODD, THE TALE OF SYDNEY SWEENEY TODD. 791 00:29:22,171 --> 00:29:25,405 SWEENEY TODD, THE TALE OF SYDNEY SWEENEY TODD. >> OH, MY GOD. 792 00:29:25,407 --> 00:29:27,874 SWEENEY TODD. >> OH, MY GOD. >> YEAH, THAT SOUNDS AWESOME. 793 00:29:27,876 --> 00:29:29,509 >> OH, MY GOD. >> YEAH, THAT SOUNDS AWESOME. >> IT'LL BE FUNNY WHEN WE DO IT. 794 00:29:29,511 --> 00:29:32,445 >> YEAH, THAT SOUNDS AWESOME. >> IT'LL BE FUNNY WHEN WE DO IT. >> HEY, BABY GIRL. 795 00:29:32,447 --> 00:29:34,014 >> IT'LL BE FUNNY WHEN WE DO IT. >> HEY, BABY GIRL. WHERE'S MY SMILE? 796 00:29:34,016 --> 00:29:35,815 >> HEY, BABY GIRL. WHERE'S MY SMILE? >> BOWEN, I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE 797 00:29:35,817 --> 00:29:36,183 WHERE'S MY SMILE? >> BOWEN, I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE STRAIGHT. 798 00:29:36,185 --> 00:29:37,484 >> BOWEN, I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE STRAIGHT. >> OH, YEAH. 799 00:29:37,486 --> 00:29:39,786 STRAIGHT. >> OH, YEAH. I'M FULL HETERO. 800 00:29:39,788 --> 00:29:40,253 >> OH, YEAH. I'M FULL HETERO. THAT'S BETTER. 801 00:29:40,255 --> 00:29:41,721 I'M FULL HETERO. THAT'S BETTER. >> SO, WHAT'S YOUR TYPE? 802 00:29:41,723 --> 00:29:45,959 THAT'S BETTER. >> SO, WHAT'S YOUR TYPE? >> OH, YOU KNOW, BLOND, SMART, 803 00:29:45,961 --> 00:29:49,229 >> SO, WHAT'S YOUR TYPE? >> OH, YOU KNOW, BLOND, SMART, HEAVY NATURALS. 804 00:29:49,231 --> 00:29:50,497 >> OH, YOU KNOW, BLOND, SMART, HEAVY NATURALS. >> OH, YEAH? 805 00:29:50,499 --> 00:29:53,867 HEAVY NATURALS. >> OH, YEAH? >> WHAT'S YOURS? 806 00:29:53,869 --> 00:29:55,368 >> OH, YEAH? >> WHAT'S YOURS? >> ASIAN PODCASTERS. 807 00:29:55,370 --> 00:29:56,636 >> WHAT'S YOURS? >> ASIAN PODCASTERS. >> I KNOW A FEW OF THOSE. 808 00:29:56,638 --> 00:29:58,438 >> ASIAN PODCASTERS. >> I KNOW A FEW OF THOSE. >> HEY, SYDNEY, ARE YOU COMING 809 00:29:58,440 --> 00:29:59,239 >> I KNOW A FEW OF THOSE. >> HEY, SYDNEY, ARE YOU COMING TO SET? 810 00:29:59,241 --> 00:30:01,041 >> HEY, SYDNEY, ARE YOU COMING TO SET? >> YEAH, I'LL BE RIGHT THERE. 811 00:30:01,043 --> 00:30:02,509 TO SET? >> YEAH, I'LL BE RIGHT THERE. >> WHEN YOU'RE TIRED OF LAUGHING 812 00:30:02,511 --> 00:30:03,210 >> YEAH, I'LL BE RIGHT THERE. >> WHEN YOU'RE TIRED OF LAUGHING WITH THE LITTLE BOYS, LET ME 813 00:30:03,212 --> 00:30:12,219 >> WHEN YOU'RE TIRED OF LAUGHING WITH THE LITTLE BOYS, LET ME KNOW. 814 00:30:12,221 --> 00:30:14,554 WITH THE LITTLE BOYS, LET ME KNOW. >> SWEEN! 815 00:30:14,556 --> 00:30:17,657 KNOW. >> SWEEN! >> YOU'RE SO [ BLEEP ] NOT! 816 00:30:17,659 --> 00:30:17,958 >> SWEEN! >> YOU'RE SO [ BLEEP ] NOT! WAIT! 817 00:30:17,960 --> 00:30:19,226 >> YOU'RE SO [ BLEEP ] NOT! WAIT! DO WE NEED PROTECTION? 818 00:30:19,228 --> 00:30:19,659 WAIT! DO WE NEED PROTECTION? >> IT'S FINE. 819 00:30:19,661 --> 00:30:22,128 DO WE NEED PROTECTION? >> IT'S FINE. I'M ON PREP. 820 00:30:22,130 --> 00:30:28,635 >> IT'S FINE. I'M ON PREP. >> THAT WAS AMAZING. 821 00:30:28,637 --> 00:30:30,303 I'M ON PREP. >> THAT WAS AMAZING. HEY, I WOULD REALLY LOVE TO SEE 822 00:30:30,305 --> 00:30:31,004 >> THAT WAS AMAZING. HEY, I WOULD REALLY LOVE TO SEE YOU AGAIN. 823 00:30:31,006 --> 00:30:31,371 HEY, I WOULD REALLY LOVE TO SEE YOU AGAIN. >> OH. 824 00:30:31,373 --> 00:30:33,773 YOU AGAIN. >> OH. YEAH, I HAVE A LOT GOING ON. 825 00:30:33,775 --> 00:30:34,941 >> OH. YEAH, I HAVE A LOT GOING ON. >> RIGHT. 826 00:30:34,943 --> 00:30:35,308 YEAH, I HAVE A LOT GOING ON. >> RIGHT. TOTALLY. 827 00:30:35,310 --> 00:30:37,644 >> RIGHT. TOTALLY. >> PLUS I GOT TO KEEP UP 828 00:30:37,646 --> 00:30:38,878 TOTALLY. >> PLUS I GOT TO KEEP UP APPEARANCES WITH THE WHOLE GAY 829 00:30:38,880 --> 00:30:39,246 >> PLUS I GOT TO KEEP UP APPEARANCES WITH THE WHOLE GAY THING. 830 00:30:39,248 --> 00:30:41,181 APPEARANCES WITH THE WHOLE GAY THING. IT'S SORT OF MY MEAL TICKET. 831 00:30:41,183 --> 00:30:41,781 THING. IT'S SORT OF MY MEAL TICKET. >> WAIT. 832 00:30:41,783 --> 00:30:43,083 IT'S SORT OF MY MEAL TICKET. >> WAIT. CAN'T YOU JUST BE STRAIGHT? 833 00:30:43,085 --> 00:30:45,085 >> WAIT. CAN'T YOU JUST BE STRAIGHT? >> YOU DON'T GET IT, OKAY? 834 00:30:45,087 --> 00:30:46,086 CAN'T YOU JUST BE STRAIGHT? >> YOU DON'T GET IT, OKAY? I DON'T WANT THIS. 835 00:30:46,088 --> 00:30:46,953 >> YOU DON'T GET IT, OKAY? I DON'T WANT THIS. I DON'T WANT YOUR LIFE. 836 00:30:46,955 --> 00:30:48,421 I DON'T WANT THIS. I DON'T WANT YOUR LIFE. >> WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN? 837 00:30:48,423 --> 00:30:51,424 I DON'T WANT YOUR LIFE. >> WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN? >> IT MEANS GET OFF MY BACK. 838 00:30:51,426 --> 00:30:51,791 >> WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN? >> IT MEANS GET OFF MY BACK. WHATEVER. 839 00:30:51,793 --> 00:31:04,738 >> IT MEANS GET OFF MY BACK. WHATEVER. I'M GOING TO PARIS. 840 00:31:04,740 --> 00:31:08,775 WHATEVER. I'M GOING TO PARIS. >> I GOT PLAYED BY BOWEN YANG. 841 00:31:08,777 --> 00:31:11,244 I'M GOING TO PARIS. >> I GOT PLAYED BY BOWEN YANG. >> WELCOME TO THE CLUB, MAMA. 842 00:31:11,246 --> 00:31:13,046 >> I GOT PLAYED BY BOWEN YANG. >> WELCOME TO THE CLUB, MAMA. >> WHY DIDN'T YOU WARN ME ABOUT 843 00:31:13,048 --> 00:31:13,313 >> WELCOME TO THE CLUB, MAMA. >> WHY DIDN'T YOU WARN ME ABOUT HIM? 844 00:31:13,315 --> 00:31:14,080 >> WHY DIDN'T YOU WARN ME ABOUT HIM? >> SOME LESSONS YOU GOT TO LEARN 845 00:31:14,082 --> 00:31:17,183 HIM? >> SOME LESSONS YOU GOT TO LEARN FOR YOURSELF. 846 00:31:17,185 --> 00:31:19,052 >> SOME LESSONS YOU GOT TO LEARN FOR YOURSELF. >> I'M NEVER GOING TO FIND LOVE. 847 00:31:19,054 --> 00:31:20,320 FOR YOURSELF. >> I'M NEVER GOING TO FIND LOVE. >> NEVER SAY NEVER. 848 00:31:20,322 --> 00:31:20,820 >> I'M NEVER GOING TO FIND LOVE. >> NEVER SAY NEVER. >> NO THANK YOU. 849 00:31:20,822 --> 00:31:25,959 >> NEVER SAY NEVER. >> NO THANK YOU. >> GET OUT! 850 00:31:30,398 --> 00:31:36,069 >>> OH, YES! >> IT'S YOUR WEDDING DAY, WE GONNA PARTY LIKE IT'S YOUR 851 00:31:36,071 --> 00:31:37,070 >> IT'S YOUR WEDDING DAY, WE GONNA PARTY LIKE IT'S YOUR WEDDING DAY! 852 00:31:37,072 --> 00:31:38,672 GONNA PARTY LIKE IT'S YOUR WEDDING DAY! >> OKAY, DOLL FACE. 853 00:31:38,674 --> 00:31:40,674 WEDDING DAY! >> OKAY, DOLL FACE. YOU READY TO SEE YOUR MAKEUP? 854 00:31:40,676 --> 00:31:41,708 >> OKAY, DOLL FACE. YOU READY TO SEE YOUR MAKEUP? >> YOU KNOW I AM. 855 00:31:41,710 --> 00:31:42,575 YOU READY TO SEE YOUR MAKEUP? >> YOU KNOW I AM. >> ALL RIGHT. 856 00:31:42,577 --> 00:31:45,045 >> YOU KNOW I AM. >> ALL RIGHT. BIG REVEAL IN THREE, TWO, ONE. 857 00:31:45,047 --> 00:31:48,281 >> ALL RIGHT. BIG REVEAL IN THREE, TWO, ONE. >> OH, MY GOD! 858 00:31:48,283 --> 00:31:50,650 BIG REVEAL IN THREE, TWO, ONE. >> OH, MY GOD! >> THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I 859 00:31:50,652 --> 00:31:54,688 >> OH, MY GOD! >> THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED, ANG AND TRYST, YOU ARE 860 00:31:54,690 --> 00:31:55,088 >> THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED, ANG AND TRYST, YOU ARE MAGICIANS. 861 00:31:55,090 --> 00:31:56,856 WANTED, ANG AND TRYST, YOU ARE MAGICIANS. >> WELL, WE HAD AN AMAZING 862 00:31:56,858 --> 00:31:57,424 MAGICIANS. >> WELL, WE HAD AN AMAZING CANVAS. 863 00:31:57,426 --> 00:32:00,894 >> WELL, WE HAD AN AMAZING CANVAS. YOU LOOK LIKE PRINCESS DI -- 864 00:32:00,896 --> 00:32:01,227 CANVAS. YOU LOOK LIKE PRINCESS DI -- BEFORE! 865 00:32:01,229 --> 00:32:01,895 YOU LOOK LIKE PRINCESS DI -- BEFORE! >> YOU'RE HILARIOUS. 866 00:32:01,897 --> 00:32:05,165 BEFORE! >> YOU'RE HILARIOUS. CAN WE GET TWO MORE BRIDESMAID 867 00:32:05,167 --> 00:32:06,499 >> YOU'RE HILARIOUS. CAN WE GET TWO MORE BRIDESMAID DRESSES IN HERE? 868 00:32:06,501 --> 00:32:07,701 CAN WE GET TWO MORE BRIDESMAID DRESSES IN HERE? >> YEAH. 869 00:32:07,703 --> 00:32:09,769 DRESSES IN HERE? >> YEAH. TWO DRESSES FOR ME PLEASE TO FIT 870 00:32:09,771 --> 00:32:11,438 >> YEAH. TWO DRESSES FOR ME PLEASE TO FIT MY FAT ASS INTO. 871 00:32:11,440 --> 00:32:14,207 TWO DRESSES FOR ME PLEASE TO FIT MY FAT ASS INTO. >> JULES, CAN I TALK TO YOU 872 00:32:14,209 --> 00:32:15,475 MY FAT ASS INTO. >> JULES, CAN I TALK TO YOU REALLY QUICKLY? 873 00:32:15,477 --> 00:32:15,942 >> JULES, CAN I TALK TO YOU REALLY QUICKLY? OUTSIDE, ALONE. 874 00:32:15,944 --> 00:32:18,445 REALLY QUICKLY? OUTSIDE, ALONE. >> WAIT, WHAT? 875 00:32:18,447 --> 00:32:20,380 OUTSIDE, ALONE. >> WAIT, WHAT? ARE YOU DOING A BIT RIGHT NOW? 876 00:32:20,382 --> 00:32:20,914 >> WAIT, WHAT? ARE YOU DOING A BIT RIGHT NOW? >> NO. 877 00:32:20,916 --> 00:32:22,849 ARE YOU DOING A BIT RIGHT NOW? >> NO. I JUST NEED TO TELL YOU 878 00:32:22,851 --> 00:32:23,216 >> NO. I JUST NEED TO TELL YOU SOMETHING. 879 00:32:23,218 --> 00:32:24,217 I JUST NEED TO TELL YOU SOMETHING. LET'S GO OUT IN THE HALL. 880 00:32:24,219 --> 00:32:24,918 SOMETHING. LET'S GO OUT IN THE HALL. >> OKAY. 881 00:32:24,920 --> 00:32:26,653 LET'S GO OUT IN THE HALL. >> OKAY. YOU'RE BEING SO WEIRD, KATE. 882 00:32:26,655 --> 00:32:27,454 >> OKAY. YOU'RE BEING SO WEIRD, KATE. JUST SAY WHAT YOU WANT TO SAY. 883 00:32:27,456 --> 00:32:29,789 YOU'RE BEING SO WEIRD, KATE. JUST SAY WHAT YOU WANT TO SAY. >> GAVIN LEFT. 884 00:32:29,791 --> 00:32:30,890 JUST SAY WHAT YOU WANT TO SAY. >> GAVIN LEFT. >> WAIT, WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE 885 00:32:30,892 --> 00:32:33,026 >> GAVIN LEFT. >> WAIT, WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE LEFT? 886 00:32:33,028 --> 00:32:37,030 >> WAIT, WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE LEFT? >> AND HE WROTE YOU A NOTE. 887 00:32:37,032 --> 00:32:40,633 LEFT? >> AND HE WROTE YOU A NOTE. >> I REALIZED I DON'T LOVE YOU. 888 00:32:40,635 --> 00:32:41,401 >> AND HE WROTE YOU A NOTE. >> I REALIZED I DON'T LOVE YOU. I CAN'T DO THIS. 889 00:32:41,403 --> 00:32:45,638 >> I REALIZED I DON'T LOVE YOU. I CAN'T DO THIS. >> I'M SO SORRY, JULES. 890 00:32:45,640 --> 00:32:51,878 I CAN'T DO THIS. >> I'M SO SORRY, JULES. >> OH, MY GOD. 891 00:32:51,880 --> 00:32:56,316 >> I'M SO SORRY, JULES. >> OH, MY GOD. >> SHOOT. 892 00:32:56,318 --> 00:32:56,616 >> OH, MY GOD. >> SHOOT. SHOOT. 893 00:32:56,618 --> 00:32:56,916 >> SHOOT. SHOOT. SHOOT. 894 00:32:56,918 --> 00:32:59,152 SHOOT. SHOOT. >> I HATE THIS. 895 00:32:59,154 --> 00:33:00,453 SHOOT. >> I HATE THIS. >> THIS IS SO TOUGH. 896 00:33:00,455 --> 00:33:02,288 >> I HATE THIS. >> THIS IS SO TOUGH. THIS IS SO TOUGH. 897 00:33:02,290 --> 00:33:04,691 >> THIS IS SO TOUGH. THIS IS SO TOUGH. JUST, UM, SHOOT. 898 00:33:04,693 --> 00:33:06,593 THIS IS SO TOUGH. JUST, UM, SHOOT. SHOOT, SHOOT, SHOOT. 899 00:33:06,595 --> 00:33:10,029 JUST, UM, SHOOT. SHOOT, SHOOT, SHOOT. JUST, UM, WHENEVER YOU GET THE 900 00:33:10,031 --> 00:33:11,231 SHOOT, SHOOT, SHOOT. JUST, UM, WHENEVER YOU GET THE CHANCE, IF YOU COULD JUST VENMO 901 00:33:11,233 --> 00:33:15,034 JUST, UM, WHENEVER YOU GET THE CHANCE, IF YOU COULD JUST VENMO US. 902 00:33:15,036 --> 00:33:18,905 CHANCE, IF YOU COULD JUST VENMO US. >> WHAT? 903 00:33:18,907 --> 00:33:23,610 US. >> WHAT? >> I KNOW THIS IS TOUGH. 904 00:33:23,612 --> 00:33:26,746 >> WHAT? >> I KNOW THIS IS TOUGH. IT'S JUST, IN OUR EXPERIENCE, IF 905 00:33:26,748 --> 00:33:28,681 >> I KNOW THIS IS TOUGH. IT'S JUST, IN OUR EXPERIENCE, IF WE DON'T GET PAID BEFORE WE 906 00:33:28,683 --> 00:33:31,184 IT'S JUST, IN OUR EXPERIENCE, IF WE DON'T GET PAID BEFORE WE LEAVE, THEN WE WON'T EVER GET 907 00:33:31,186 --> 00:33:31,484 WE DON'T GET PAID BEFORE WE LEAVE, THEN WE WON'T EVER GET PAID. 908 00:33:31,486 --> 00:33:32,852 LEAVE, THEN WE WON'T EVER GET PAID. >> WAIT, DIDN'T WE PAY YOU 909 00:33:32,854 --> 00:33:33,186 PAID. >> WAIT, DIDN'T WE PAY YOU ALREADY? 910 00:33:33,188 --> 00:33:36,356 >> WAIT, DIDN'T WE PAY YOU ALREADY? >> SHOOT. 911 00:33:36,358 --> 00:33:39,392 ALREADY? >> SHOOT. SHOOT, I'M EMBARRASSED. 912 00:33:39,394 --> 00:33:41,094 >> SHOOT. SHOOT, I'M EMBARRASSED. >> YEAH. 913 00:33:41,096 --> 00:33:42,495 SHOOT, I'M EMBARRASSED. >> YEAH. YOU'RE SO RIGHT. 914 00:33:42,497 --> 00:33:43,596 >> YEAH. YOU'RE SO RIGHT. >> GAVIN JUST TEXTED. 915 00:33:43,598 --> 00:33:44,898 YOU'RE SO RIGHT. >> GAVIN JUST TEXTED. DAMN IT, I KNEW IT. 916 00:33:44,900 --> 00:33:46,699 >> GAVIN JUST TEXTED. DAMN IT, I KNEW IT. HE WANTS TO EXPLORE THINGS 917 00:33:46,701 --> 00:33:48,635 DAMN IT, I KNEW IT. HE WANTS TO EXPLORE THINGS FURTHER WITH HIS COWORKER SASHA. 918 00:33:48,637 --> 00:33:49,702 HE WANTS TO EXPLORE THINGS FURTHER WITH HIS COWORKER SASHA. >> OH, MY GOD. 919 00:33:49,704 --> 00:33:50,503 FURTHER WITH HIS COWORKER SASHA. >> OH, MY GOD. ARE YOU SERIOUS? 920 00:33:50,505 --> 00:33:52,338 >> OH, MY GOD. ARE YOU SERIOUS? >> BUCK TOOTH SASHA? 921 00:33:52,340 --> 00:33:52,906 ARE YOU SERIOUS? >> BUCK TOOTH SASHA? >> THIS ISN'T RIGHT. 922 00:33:52,908 --> 00:33:58,978 >> BUCK TOOTH SASHA? >> THIS ISN'T RIGHT. >> MEN ARE DOGS. 923 00:33:58,980 --> 00:34:00,814 >> THIS ISN'T RIGHT. >> MEN ARE DOGS. >> SHOOT. 924 00:34:00,816 --> 00:34:01,514 >> MEN ARE DOGS. >> SHOOT. THIS IS BRUTAL. 925 00:34:01,516 --> 00:34:03,082 >> SHOOT. THIS IS BRUTAL. >> YEAH. 926 00:34:03,084 --> 00:34:05,185 THIS IS BRUTAL. >> YEAH. JUST -- SHOOT. 927 00:34:05,187 --> 00:34:06,786 >> YEAH. JUST -- SHOOT. WHENEVER -- WHENEVER YOU GET THE 928 00:34:06,788 --> 00:34:07,187 JUST -- SHOOT. WHENEVER -- WHENEVER YOU GET THE CHANCE -- 929 00:34:07,189 --> 00:34:09,322 WHENEVER -- WHENEVER YOU GET THE CHANCE -- >> AND NO RUSH -- AND NO RUSH. 930 00:34:09,324 --> 00:34:12,258 CHANCE -- >> AND NO RUSH -- AND NO RUSH. >> IF YOU COULD JUST LEAVE A 931 00:34:12,260 --> 00:34:13,760 >> AND NO RUSH -- AND NO RUSH. >> IF YOU COULD JUST LEAVE A REVIEW ON OUR YELP. 932 00:34:13,762 --> 00:34:15,395 >> IF YOU COULD JUST LEAVE A REVIEW ON OUR YELP. >> RIGHT NOW? 933 00:34:15,397 --> 00:34:17,363 REVIEW ON OUR YELP. >> RIGHT NOW? >> IN OUR EXPERIENCE, IF YOU 934 00:34:17,365 --> 00:34:19,098 >> RIGHT NOW? >> IN OUR EXPERIENCE, IF YOU DON'T GET THE REVIEW BEFORE YOU 935 00:34:19,100 --> 00:34:21,034 >> IN OUR EXPERIENCE, IF YOU DON'T GET THE REVIEW BEFORE YOU LEAVE, YOU NEVER GET IT. 936 00:34:21,036 --> 00:34:24,070 DON'T GET THE REVIEW BEFORE YOU LEAVE, YOU NEVER GET IT. >> WRITE WHATEVER, LIKE MAYBE IF 937 00:34:24,072 --> 00:34:27,674 LEAVE, YOU NEVER GET IT. >> WRITE WHATEVER, LIKE MAYBE IF MY FIANCE SAW MY GORGEOUS FACE, 938 00:34:27,676 --> 00:34:28,741 >> WRITE WHATEVER, LIKE MAYBE IF MY FIANCE SAW MY GORGEOUS FACE, HE NEVER WOULD HAVE LEFT. 939 00:34:28,743 --> 00:34:30,176 MY FIANCE SAW MY GORGEOUS FACE, HE NEVER WOULD HAVE LEFT. >> ENOUGH. 940 00:34:30,178 --> 00:34:31,878 HE NEVER WOULD HAVE LEFT. >> ENOUGH. HE HAVE FIANCE JUST LEFT. 941 00:34:31,880 --> 00:34:34,347 >> ENOUGH. HE HAVE FIANCE JUST LEFT. >> I DIDN'T WANT TO TELL 942 00:34:34,349 --> 00:34:35,114 HE HAVE FIANCE JUST LEFT. >> I DIDN'T WANT TO TELL ANYBODY, BUT -- 943 00:34:35,116 --> 00:34:36,516 >> I DIDN'T WANT TO TELL ANYBODY, BUT -- >> WHAT IS IT? 944 00:34:36,518 --> 00:34:38,751 ANYBODY, BUT -- >> WHAT IS IT? >> I'M TWO MONTHS PREGNANT. 945 00:34:38,753 --> 00:34:42,222 >> WHAT IS IT? >> I'M TWO MONTHS PREGNANT. MY BABY WON'T EVEN HAVE A 946 00:34:42,224 --> 00:34:42,555 >> I'M TWO MONTHS PREGNANT. MY BABY WON'T EVEN HAVE A FATHER. 947 00:34:42,557 --> 00:34:44,290 MY BABY WON'T EVEN HAVE A FATHER. >> SHOOT, SHOOT. 948 00:34:44,292 --> 00:34:45,592 FATHER. >> SHOOT, SHOOT. HONEY, HONEY, OKAY. 949 00:34:45,594 --> 00:34:46,659 >> SHOOT, SHOOT. HONEY, HONEY, OKAY. I DON'T WANT YOU TO CRY. 950 00:34:46,661 --> 00:34:47,760 HONEY, HONEY, OKAY. I DON'T WANT YOU TO CRY. I DON'T WANT YOU TO CRY. 951 00:34:47,762 --> 00:34:48,761 I DON'T WANT YOU TO CRY. I DON'T WANT YOU TO CRY. >> I KNOW. 952 00:34:48,763 --> 00:34:49,929 I DON'T WANT YOU TO CRY. >> I KNOW. I NEED TO BE STRONG. 953 00:34:49,931 --> 00:34:52,966 >> I KNOW. I NEED TO BE STRONG. >> BECAUSE WE -- WE STILL NEED A 954 00:34:52,968 --> 00:34:55,301 I NEED TO BE STRONG. >> BECAUSE WE -- WE STILL NEED A PIC FOR OUR WEBSITE. 955 00:34:55,303 --> 00:34:56,903 >> BECAUSE WE -- WE STILL NEED A PIC FOR OUR WEBSITE. >> YEAH. 956 00:34:56,905 --> 00:34:57,203 PIC FOR OUR WEBSITE. >> YEAH. YEAH. 957 00:34:57,205 --> 00:34:59,439 >> YEAH. YEAH. WE GOT -- SMILE INTO THE iPAD. 958 00:34:59,441 --> 00:35:03,009 YEAH. WE GOT -- SMILE INTO THE iPAD. WE GOT KICKED OFF INSTAGRAM FOR 959 00:35:03,011 --> 00:35:08,548 WE GOT -- SMILE INTO THE iPAD. WE GOT KICKED OFF INSTAGRAM FOR COMMENTING SNITCH ON ALL OF LEAH 960 00:35:08,550 --> 00:35:09,449 WE GOT KICKED OFF INSTAGRAM FOR COMMENTING SNITCH ON ALL OF LEAH REMINI'S POSTS. 961 00:35:09,451 --> 00:35:11,451 COMMENTING SNITCH ON ALL OF LEAH REMINI'S POSTS. >> I FEEL LIKE I WANT TO KILL 962 00:35:11,453 --> 00:35:11,751 REMINI'S POSTS. >> I FEEL LIKE I WANT TO KILL YOU. 963 00:35:11,753 --> 00:35:12,752 >> I FEEL LIKE I WANT TO KILL YOU. >> MAYBE IT'S MY FAULT FOR 964 00:35:12,754 --> 00:35:13,653 YOU. >> MAYBE IT'S MY FAULT FOR RUSHING THE WEDDING. 965 00:35:13,655 --> 00:35:15,688 >> MAYBE IT'S MY FAULT FOR RUSHING THE WEDDING. I JUST WANTED TO GET MARRIED 966 00:35:15,690 --> 00:35:17,757 RUSHING THE WEDDING. I JUST WANTED TO GET MARRIED WHILE MY GRANDMA WAS STILL 967 00:35:17,759 --> 00:35:19,259 I JUST WANTED TO GET MARRIED WHILE MY GRANDMA WAS STILL ALIVE, AND OF COURSE SHE PASSED 968 00:35:19,261 --> 00:35:20,326 WHILE MY GRANDMA WAS STILL ALIVE, AND OF COURSE SHE PASSED AWAY TWO WEEKS AGO. 969 00:35:20,328 --> 00:35:25,765 ALIVE, AND OF COURSE SHE PASSED AWAY TWO WEEKS AGO. >> SHOOT, SHOOT. 970 00:35:25,767 --> 00:35:26,533 AWAY TWO WEEKS AGO. >> SHOOT, SHOOT. IS THERE ANY SHELL FISH IN THIS 971 00:35:26,535 --> 00:35:26,833 >> SHOOT, SHOOT. IS THERE ANY SHELL FISH IN THIS CAKE? 972 00:35:26,835 --> 00:35:27,133 IS THERE ANY SHELL FISH IN THIS CAKE? >> NO. 973 00:35:27,135 --> 00:35:28,134 CAKE? >> NO. IT'S A CAKE. 974 00:35:28,136 --> 00:35:29,869 >> NO. IT'S A CAKE. PLEASE LEAVE. 975 00:35:29,871 --> 00:35:30,603 IT'S A CAKE. PLEASE LEAVE. >> SHOOT. 976 00:35:30,605 --> 00:35:32,372 PLEASE LEAVE. >> SHOOT. YOU KNOW, I WOULD BE KICKING 977 00:35:32,374 --> 00:35:34,007 >> SHOOT. YOU KNOW, I WOULD BE KICKING MYSELF IF I DIDN'T MENTION IT, 978 00:35:34,009 --> 00:35:35,875 YOU KNOW, I WOULD BE KICKING MYSELF IF I DIDN'T MENTION IT, BUT MY BROTHER'S SINGLE. 979 00:35:35,877 --> 00:35:36,943 MYSELF IF I DIDN'T MENTION IT, BUT MY BROTHER'S SINGLE. >> HE'S HILARIOUS. 980 00:35:36,945 --> 00:35:39,345 BUT MY BROTHER'S SINGLE. >> HE'S HILARIOUS. >> AND HE GETS OUT OF HIS 981 00:35:39,347 --> 00:35:40,513 >> HE'S HILARIOUS. >> AND HE GETS OUT OF HIS HALFWAY HOUSE IN APRIL, SO. 982 00:35:40,515 --> 00:35:41,080 >> AND HE GETS OUT OF HIS HALFWAY HOUSE IN APRIL, SO. >> REALLY? 983 00:35:41,082 --> 00:35:42,282 HALFWAY HOUSE IN APRIL, SO. >> REALLY? I MEAN, I GUESS IT'S NICE TO 984 00:35:42,284 --> 00:35:46,920 >> REALLY? I MEAN, I GUESS IT'S NICE TO IMAGINE DATING AGAIN. 985 00:35:46,922 --> 00:35:47,687 I MEAN, I GUESS IT'S NICE TO IMAGINE DATING AGAIN. >> SHOOT. 986 00:35:47,689 --> 00:35:50,857 IMAGINE DATING AGAIN. >> SHOOT. >> I JUST REMEMBERED HE HATES 987 00:35:50,859 --> 00:35:51,324 >> SHOOT. >> I JUST REMEMBERED HE HATES PREGNANT WOMEN. 988 00:35:51,326 --> 00:35:56,095 >> I JUST REMEMBERED HE HATES PREGNANT WOMEN. >> SHOOT! 989 00:36:18,586 --> 00:36:24,223 >>> LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, KACEY MUSGRAVES! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 990 00:36:24,225 --> 00:36:36,569 MUSGRAVES! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] ♪♪ 991 00:36:36,571 --> 00:36:40,940 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] ♪♪ ♪ MY SATURN HAS RETURNED 992 00:36:40,942 --> 00:36:42,008 ♪♪ ♪ MY SATURN HAS RETURNED WHEN I TURNED TWENTY-SEVEN 993 00:36:42,010 --> 00:36:43,576 ♪ MY SATURN HAS RETURNED WHEN I TURNED TWENTY-SEVEN EVERYTHING 994 00:36:43,578 --> 00:36:47,880 WHEN I TURNED TWENTY-SEVEN EVERYTHING STARTED TO CHANGE ♪ 995 00:36:47,882 --> 00:36:50,016 EVERYTHING STARTED TO CHANGE ♪ ♪ TOOK A LONG TIME 996 00:36:50,018 --> 00:36:52,719 STARTED TO CHANGE ♪ ♪ TOOK A LONG TIME BUT I LEARNED 997 00:36:52,721 --> 00:36:55,421 ♪ TOOK A LONG TIME BUT I LEARNED THERE'S TWO KINDS OF PEOPLE ♪ 998 00:36:55,423 --> 00:36:56,456 BUT I LEARNED THERE'S TWO KINDS OF PEOPLE ♪ ♪ ONE IS A GIVER 999 00:36:56,458 --> 00:36:58,591 THERE'S TWO KINDS OF PEOPLE ♪ ♪ ONE IS A GIVER AND ONE'S 1000 00:36:58,593 --> 00:37:00,226 ♪ ONE IS A GIVER AND ONE'S ALWAYS TRYIN' TO TAKE 1001 00:37:00,228 --> 00:37:06,165 AND ONE'S ALWAYS TRYIN' TO TAKE ALL THEY CAN TAKE ♪ 1002 00:37:06,167 --> 00:37:08,801 ALWAYS TRYIN' TO TAKE ALL THEY CAN TAKE ♪ ♪ SO I'M SAYIN' GOODBYE 1003 00:37:08,803 --> 00:37:09,902 ALL THEY CAN TAKE ♪ ♪ SO I'M SAYIN' GOODBYE TO THE PEOPLE THAT I FEEL 1004 00:37:09,904 --> 00:37:11,504 ♪ SO I'M SAYIN' GOODBYE TO THE PEOPLE THAT I FEEL ARE REAL GOOD 1005 00:37:11,506 --> 00:37:15,274 TO THE PEOPLE THAT I FEEL ARE REAL GOOD AT WASTIN' MY TIME ♪ 1006 00:37:15,276 --> 00:37:16,876 ARE REAL GOOD AT WASTIN' MY TIME ♪ ♪ NO REGRETS BABY 1007 00:37:16,878 --> 00:37:18,478 AT WASTIN' MY TIME ♪ ♪ NO REGRETS BABY I JUST THINK THAT MAYBE 1008 00:37:18,480 --> 00:37:20,079 ♪ NO REGRETS BABY I JUST THINK THAT MAYBE YOU GO YOUR WAY 1009 00:37:20,081 --> 00:37:23,282 I JUST THINK THAT MAYBE YOU GO YOUR WAY AND I'LL GO MINE ♪ 1010 00:37:23,284 --> 00:37:24,917 YOU GO YOUR WAY AND I'LL GO MINE ♪ ♪ IT'S BEEN 1011 00:37:24,919 --> 00:37:29,255 AND I'LL GO MINE ♪ ♪ IT'S BEEN A REAL GOOD TIME ♪ 1012 00:37:29,257 --> 00:37:31,958 ♪ IT'S BEEN A REAL GOOD TIME ♪ ♪ BUT YOU GOT DARK ENERGY 1013 00:37:31,960 --> 00:37:33,626 A REAL GOOD TIME ♪ ♪ BUT YOU GOT DARK ENERGY SOMETHIN' I CAN'T UNSEE 1014 00:37:33,628 --> 00:37:35,194 ♪ BUT YOU GOT DARK ENERGY SOMETHIN' I CAN'T UNSEE AND I'VE GOT TO 1015 00:37:35,196 --> 00:37:41,701 SOMETHIN' I CAN'T UNSEE AND I'VE GOT TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF ♪ 1016 00:37:41,703 --> 00:37:45,471 AND I'VE GOT TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF ♪ ♪ I FOUND A DEEPER WELL ♪ 1017 00:37:45,473 --> 00:37:52,478 TAKE CARE OF MYSELF ♪ ♪ I FOUND A DEEPER WELL ♪ ♪♪ 1018 00:37:52,480 --> 00:37:55,682 ♪ I FOUND A DEEPER WELL ♪ ♪♪ ♪ I USED TO WAKE AND BAKE 1019 00:37:55,684 --> 00:37:57,917 ♪♪ ♪ I USED TO WAKE AND BAKE ROLL OUT OF BED 1020 00:37:57,919 --> 00:37:59,018 ♪ I USED TO WAKE AND BAKE ROLL OUT OF BED HIT THE GRAVITY BONG 1021 00:37:59,020 --> 00:38:01,154 ROLL OUT OF BED HIT THE GRAVITY BONG THAT I MADE ♪ 1022 00:38:01,156 --> 00:38:06,025 HIT THE GRAVITY BONG THAT I MADE ♪ ♪ AND START THE DAY ♪ 1023 00:38:06,027 --> 00:38:08,728 THAT I MADE ♪ ♪ AND START THE DAY ♪ ♪ FOR A WHILE IT GOT ME BY 1024 00:38:08,730 --> 00:38:11,998 ♪ AND START THE DAY ♪ ♪ FOR A WHILE IT GOT ME BY EVERYTHING I DID 1025 00:38:12,000 --> 00:38:14,167 ♪ FOR A WHILE IT GOT ME BY EVERYTHING I DID SEEMED BETTER WHEN I WAS HIGH 1026 00:38:14,169 --> 00:38:20,039 EVERYTHING I DID SEEMED BETTER WHEN I WAS HIGH I DON'T KNOW WHY ♪ 1027 00:38:20,041 --> 00:38:22,175 SEEMED BETTER WHEN I WAS HIGH I DON'T KNOW WHY ♪ ♪ SO I'M GETTIN' RID 1028 00:38:22,177 --> 00:38:23,810 I DON'T KNOW WHY ♪ ♪ SO I'M GETTIN' RID OF THE HABITS THAT I FEEL 1029 00:38:23,812 --> 00:38:24,911 ♪ SO I'M GETTIN' RID OF THE HABITS THAT I FEEL ARE REAL GOOD 1030 00:38:24,913 --> 00:38:28,114 OF THE HABITS THAT I FEEL ARE REAL GOOD AT WASTIN' MY TIME ♪ 1031 00:38:28,116 --> 00:38:30,283 ARE REAL GOOD AT WASTIN' MY TIME ♪ ♪ NO REGRETS BABY 1032 00:38:30,285 --> 00:38:33,019 AT WASTIN' MY TIME ♪ ♪ NO REGRETS BABY I JUST THINK THAT MAYBE 1033 00:38:33,021 --> 00:38:33,619 ♪ NO REGRETS BABY I JUST THINK THAT MAYBE IT'S NATURAL WHEN THINGS 1034 00:38:33,621 --> 00:38:37,890 I JUST THINK THAT MAYBE IT'S NATURAL WHEN THINGS LOSE THEIR SHINE ♪ 1035 00:38:37,892 --> 00:38:43,262 IT'S NATURAL WHEN THINGS LOSE THEIR SHINE ♪ ♪ SO OTHER THINGS CAN GLOW 1036 00:38:43,264 --> 00:38:44,363 LOSE THEIR SHINE ♪ ♪ SO OTHER THINGS CAN GLOW I'VE GOTTEN OLDER NOW 1037 00:38:44,365 --> 00:38:50,269 ♪ SO OTHER THINGS CAN GLOW I'VE GOTTEN OLDER NOW I KNOW ♪ 1038 00:38:50,271 --> 00:38:57,276 I'VE GOTTEN OLDER NOW I KNOW ♪ ♪ HOW TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF 1039 00:38:57,278 --> 00:38:59,979 I KNOW ♪ ♪ HOW TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF I FOUND A DEEPER WELL ♪ 1040 00:38:59,981 --> 00:39:04,851 ♪ HOW TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF I FOUND A DEEPER WELL ♪ ♪♪ 1041 00:39:04,853 --> 00:39:05,384 I FOUND A DEEPER WELL ♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ 1042 00:39:05,386 --> 00:39:16,696 ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ 1043 00:39:16,698 --> 00:39:20,466 ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪ WHEN I WAS GROWING UP 1044 00:39:20,468 --> 00:39:22,602 ♪♪ ♪ WHEN I WAS GROWING UP WE HAD WHAT WE NEEDED 1045 00:39:22,604 --> 00:39:23,703 ♪ WHEN I WAS GROWING UP WE HAD WHAT WE NEEDED SHOES ON OUR FEET ♪ 1046 00:39:23,705 --> 00:39:25,338 WE HAD WHAT WE NEEDED SHOES ON OUR FEET ♪ ♪ BUT THE WORLD 1047 00:39:25,340 --> 00:39:28,007 SHOES ON OUR FEET ♪ ♪ BUT THE WORLD WAS AS FLAT AS A PLATE 1048 00:39:28,009 --> 00:39:31,277 ♪ BUT THE WORLD WAS AS FLAT AS A PLATE AND THAT'S OKAY ♪ 1049 00:39:31,279 --> 00:39:32,879 WAS AS FLAT AS A PLATE AND THAT'S OKAY ♪ ♪ THE THINGS I WAS TAUGHT 1050 00:39:32,881 --> 00:39:34,480 AND THAT'S OKAY ♪ ♪ THE THINGS I WAS TAUGHT ONLY TOOK ME SO FAR 1051 00:39:34,482 --> 00:39:36,115 ♪ THE THINGS I WAS TAUGHT ONLY TOOK ME SO FAR HAD TO FIGURE 1052 00:39:36,117 --> 00:39:40,419 ONLY TOOK ME SO FAR HAD TO FIGURE THE REST OUT MYSELF ♪ 1053 00:39:40,421 --> 00:39:47,426 HAD TO FIGURE THE REST OUT MYSELF ♪ ♪ AND THEN I FOUND 1054 00:39:47,428 --> 00:39:49,061 THE REST OUT MYSELF ♪ ♪ AND THEN I FOUND I FOUND A DEEPER WELL ♪ 1055 00:39:49,063 --> 00:39:51,798 ♪ AND THEN I FOUND I FOUND A DEEPER WELL ♪ ♪♪ 1056 00:39:51,800 --> 00:39:56,102 I FOUND A DEEPER WELL ♪ ♪♪ ♪ MM-MM 1057 00:39:56,104 --> 00:39:58,271 ♪♪ ♪ MM-MM MM 1058 00:39:58,273 --> 00:40:03,709 ♪ MM-MM MM ♪♪ 1059 00:40:03,711 --> 00:40:08,915 MM ♪♪ [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 1060 00:40:33,524 --> 00:40:43,499 >> Announcer: IT'S "WEEKEND UPDATE" WITH COLIN JOST AND MICHAEL CHE. 1061 00:40:43,501 --> 00:40:45,201 UPDATE" WITH COLIN JOST AND MICHAEL CHE. >>> GOOD EVENING, EVERYONE. 1062 00:40:45,203 --> 00:40:46,369 MICHAEL CHE. >>> GOOD EVENING, EVERYONE. >> WELCOME TO "WEEKEND UPDATE." 1063 00:40:46,371 --> 00:40:47,003 >>> GOOD EVENING, EVERYONE. >> WELCOME TO "WEEKEND UPDATE." I'M MICHAEL CHE. 1064 00:40:47,005 --> 00:40:47,503 >> WELCOME TO "WEEKEND UPDATE." I'M MICHAEL CHE. >> I'M COLIN JOST. 1065 00:40:47,505 --> 00:40:51,107 I'M MICHAEL CHE. >> I'M COLIN JOST. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 1066 00:40:51,109 --> 00:40:54,176 >> I'M COLIN JOST. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] PRESIDENT BIDEN VISITED THE 1067 00:40:54,178 --> 00:40:54,944 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] PRESIDENT BIDEN VISITED THE SOUTHERN BORDER ON THURSDAY AND 1068 00:40:54,946 --> 00:40:56,112 PRESIDENT BIDEN VISITED THE SOUTHERN BORDER ON THURSDAY AND WAS HORRIFIED TO DISCOVER IT IS 1069 00:40:56,114 --> 00:40:57,580 SOUTHERN BORDER ON THURSDAY AND WAS HORRIFIED TO DISCOVER IT IS BEING SWARMED BY CRIMINALS AND 1070 00:40:57,582 --> 00:41:02,151 WAS HORRIFIED TO DISCOVER IT IS BEING SWARMED BY CRIMINALS AND RAPISTS. 1071 00:41:02,153 --> 00:41:05,321 BEING SWARMED BY CRIMINALS AND RAPISTS. THAT'S RIGHT, BOTH BIDEN AND 1072 00:41:05,323 --> 00:41:06,622 RAPISTS. THAT'S RIGHT, BOTH BIDEN AND TRUMP COINCIDENTALLY VISITED THE 1073 00:41:06,624 --> 00:41:08,057 THAT'S RIGHT, BOTH BIDEN AND TRUMP COINCIDENTALLY VISITED THE BORDER ON THE SAME DAY, WHICH 1074 00:41:08,059 --> 00:41:11,694 TRUMP COINCIDENTALLY VISITED THE BORDER ON THE SAME DAY, WHICH SOUNDS LIKE THE SETUP FOR THE 1075 00:41:11,696 --> 00:41:14,530 BORDER ON THE SAME DAY, WHICH SOUNDS LIKE THE SETUP FOR THE WEIRDEST ROM COM OF ALL TIME. 1076 00:41:14,532 --> 00:41:17,533 SOUNDS LIKE THE SETUP FOR THE WEIRDEST ROM COM OF ALL TIME. MY FAVORITE PART OF THE VISIT 1077 00:41:17,535 --> 00:41:19,569 WEIRDEST ROM COM OF ALL TIME. MY FAVORITE PART OF THE VISIT WAS WHEN TRUMP, WHO LOOKS GOOD 1078 00:41:19,571 --> 00:41:22,138 MY FAVORITE PART OF THE VISIT WAS WHEN TRUMP, WHO LOOKS GOOD BEHIND BARS BY THE WAY, FINALLY 1079 00:41:22,140 --> 00:41:25,174 WAS WHEN TRUMP, WHO LOOKS GOOD BEHIND BARS BY THE WAY, FINALLY CAME FACE TO FACE WITH HIS SWORN 1080 00:41:25,176 --> 00:41:26,809 BEHIND BARS BY THE WAY, FINALLY CAME FACE TO FACE WITH HIS SWORN ENEMIES, THE MIGRANTS, AND HE 1081 00:41:26,811 --> 00:41:28,911 CAME FACE TO FACE WITH HIS SWORN ENEMIES, THE MIGRANTS, AND HE HAD A PRETTY HARSH MESSAGE FOR 1082 00:41:28,913 --> 00:41:29,211 ENEMIES, THE MIGRANTS, AND HE HAD A PRETTY HARSH MESSAGE FOR THEM. 1083 00:41:29,213 --> 00:41:33,182 HAD A PRETTY HARSH MESSAGE FOR THEM. TAKE A LOOK. 1084 00:41:33,184 --> 00:41:33,849 THEM. TAKE A LOOK. >> THEY LIKE TRUMP, CAN YOU 1085 00:41:33,851 --> 00:41:36,385 TAKE A LOOK. >> THEY LIKE TRUMP, CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? 1086 00:41:36,387 --> 00:41:37,753 >> THEY LIKE TRUMP, CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? >> NO, I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. 1087 00:41:37,755 --> 00:41:39,922 BELIEVE IT? >> NO, I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. THE MIGRANTS DON'T LIKE YOU. 1088 00:41:39,924 --> 00:41:41,924 >> NO, I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. THE MIGRANTS DON'T LIKE YOU. THEY JUST WALKED A THOUSAND 1089 00:41:41,926 --> 00:41:44,860 THE MIGRANTS DON'T LIKE YOU. THEY JUST WALKED A THOUSAND MILES TO GET TO THE EDGE OF THIS 1090 00:41:44,862 --> 00:41:46,495 THEY JUST WALKED A THOUSAND MILES TO GET TO THE EDGE OF THIS RIVER, AND THEY'RE PROBABLY 1091 00:41:46,497 --> 00:41:49,532 MILES TO GET TO THE EDGE OF THIS RIVER, AND THEY'RE PROBABLY THINKING IS THAT GUY IN A TRUMP 1092 00:41:49,534 --> 00:41:53,336 RIVER, AND THEY'RE PROBABLY THINKING IS THAT GUY IN A TRUMP COSTUME WAVING US INTO THE 1093 00:41:53,338 --> 00:41:53,669 THINKING IS THAT GUY IN A TRUMP COSTUME WAVING US INTO THE COUNTRY? 1094 00:41:53,671 --> 00:41:55,972 COSTUME WAVING US INTO THE COUNTRY? >> MITCH McCONNELL SEEN HERE 1095 00:41:55,974 --> 00:41:58,474 COUNTRY? >> MITCH McCONNELL SEEN HERE CATCHING UP ON NEWS FROM THE 1096 00:41:58,476 --> 00:41:59,208 >> MITCH McCONNELL SEEN HERE CATCHING UP ON NEWS FROM THE MIDDLE EAST, ANNOUNCED HE WILL 1097 00:41:59,210 --> 00:42:00,610 CATCHING UP ON NEWS FROM THE MIDDLE EAST, ANNOUNCED HE WILL STEP DOWN AS THE REPUBLICAN 1098 00:42:00,612 --> 00:42:02,011 MIDDLE EAST, ANNOUNCED HE WILL STEP DOWN AS THE REPUBLICAN LEADER IN THE SENATE. 1099 00:42:02,013 --> 00:42:04,614 STEP DOWN AS THE REPUBLICAN LEADER IN THE SENATE. McCONNELL HAS LEADER FOR ALMOST 1100 00:42:04,616 --> 00:42:06,716 LEADER IN THE SENATE. McCONNELL HAS LEADER FOR ALMOST 20 YEARS, BUT HE FIRST GOT 1101 00:42:06,718 --> 00:42:08,618 McCONNELL HAS LEADER FOR ALMOST 20 YEARS, BUT HE FIRST GOT INVOLVED IN POLITICS BACK IN 1102 00:42:08,620 --> 00:42:10,786 20 YEARS, BUT HE FIRST GOT INVOLVED IN POLITICS BACK IN 1968 WHEN HE LOST A FIDDLE 1103 00:42:10,788 --> 00:42:11,520 INVOLVED IN POLITICS BACK IN 1968 WHEN HE LOST A FIDDLE CONTEST TO THE DEVIL. 1104 00:42:11,522 --> 00:42:13,122 1968 WHEN HE LOST A FIDDLE CONTEST TO THE DEVIL. MANY ARE SAYING HE IS LEAVING 1105 00:42:13,124 --> 00:42:15,424 CONTEST TO THE DEVIL. MANY ARE SAYING HE IS LEAVING BECAUSE OF HIS BAD RELATIONSHIP 1106 00:42:15,426 --> 00:42:15,925 MANY ARE SAYING HE IS LEAVING BECAUSE OF HIS BAD RELATIONSHIP WITH DONALD TRUMP. 1107 00:42:15,927 --> 00:42:17,593 BECAUSE OF HIS BAD RELATIONSHIP WITH DONALD TRUMP. COME ON, JUST BECAUSE YOU HATE 1108 00:42:17,595 --> 00:42:18,761 WITH DONALD TRUMP. COME ON, JUST BECAUSE YOU HATE SOMEBODY DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN'T 1109 00:42:18,763 --> 00:42:20,096 COME ON, JUST BECAUSE YOU HATE SOMEBODY DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN'T STILL HAVE A VERY SUCCESSFUL 1110 00:42:20,098 --> 00:42:31,007 SOMEBODY DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN'T STILL HAVE A VERY SUCCESSFUL WORKING RELATIONSHIP WITH THEM. 1111 00:42:31,009 --> 00:42:31,407 STILL HAVE A VERY SUCCESSFUL WORKING RELATIONSHIP WITH THEM. [ LAUGHTER ] 1112 00:42:31,409 --> 00:42:33,242 WORKING RELATIONSHIP WITH THEM. [ LAUGHTER ] >> I ALMOST FEEL LIKE THAT WAS 1113 00:42:33,244 --> 00:42:35,578 [ LAUGHTER ] >> I ALMOST FEEL LIKE THAT WAS ABOUT ME. 1114 00:42:35,580 --> 00:42:37,913 >> I ALMOST FEEL LIKE THAT WAS ABOUT ME. MITCH McCONNELL, SEEN HERE 1115 00:42:37,915 --> 00:42:41,317 ABOUT ME. MITCH McCONNELL, SEEN HERE WALKING OUT OF A THEATER AFTER 1116 00:42:41,319 --> 00:42:42,585 MITCH McCONNELL, SEEN HERE WALKING OUT OF A THEATER AFTER WATCHING 12 YEARS A SLAVE -- 1117 00:42:42,587 --> 00:42:46,622 WALKING OUT OF A THEATER AFTER WATCHING 12 YEARS A SLAVE -- [ LAUGHTER ] 1118 00:42:46,624 --> 00:42:49,325 WATCHING 12 YEARS A SLAVE -- [ LAUGHTER ] -- ANNOUNCED HE WILL STEP DOWN 1119 00:42:49,327 --> 00:42:50,326 [ LAUGHTER ] -- ANNOUNCED HE WILL STEP DOWN IN NOVEMBER. 1120 00:42:50,328 --> 00:42:51,894 -- ANNOUNCED HE WILL STEP DOWN IN NOVEMBER. HE'LL BE REPLACE TD BY THE 1121 00:42:51,896 --> 00:42:54,864 IN NOVEMBER. HE'LL BE REPLACE TD BY THE CURRENT NUMBER TWO REPUBLICAN IN 1122 00:42:54,866 --> 00:42:55,598 HE'LL BE REPLACE TD BY THE CURRENT NUMBER TWO REPUBLICAN IN THE SENATE, A FROZEN EMBRYO 1123 00:42:55,600 --> 00:42:58,634 CURRENT NUMBER TWO REPUBLICAN IN THE SENATE, A FROZEN EMBRYO HOLDING AN ASSAULT RIFLE. 1124 00:42:58,636 --> 00:43:01,303 THE SENATE, A FROZEN EMBRYO HOLDING AN ASSAULT RIFLE. MITCH McCONNELL, SEEN HERE AFTER 1125 00:43:01,305 --> 00:43:07,543 HOLDING AN ASSAULT RIFLE. MITCH McCONNELL, SEEN HERE AFTER REARRANGING A BLIND WOMAN'S 1126 00:43:07,545 --> 00:43:07,977 MITCH McCONNELL, SEEN HERE AFTER REARRANGING A BLIND WOMAN'S FURNITURE -- 1127 00:43:07,979 --> 00:43:08,377 REARRANGING A BLIND WOMAN'S FURNITURE -- [ LAUGHTER ] 1128 00:43:08,379 --> 00:43:10,513 FURNITURE -- [ LAUGHTER ] -- GAVE A MOVING SPEECH ON THE 1129 00:43:10,515 --> 00:43:12,548 [ LAUGHTER ] -- GAVE A MOVING SPEECH ON THE SENATE FLOOR ANNOUNCING HIS 1130 00:43:12,550 --> 00:43:13,916 -- GAVE A MOVING SPEECH ON THE SENATE FLOOR ANNOUNCING HIS RETIREMENT, WHICH MADE ME START 1131 00:43:13,918 --> 00:43:16,052 SENATE FLOOR ANNOUNCING HIS RETIREMENT, WHICH MADE ME START TO ADMIRE MITCH McCONNELL, SEEN 1132 00:43:16,054 --> 00:43:17,720 RETIREMENT, WHICH MADE ME START TO ADMIRE MITCH McCONNELL, SEEN HERE WATCHING A SINGLE MOTHER 1133 00:43:17,722 --> 00:43:23,559 TO ADMIRE MITCH McCONNELL, SEEN HERE WATCHING A SINGLE MOTHER SELL HER BLOOD FOR DIAPER MONEY. 1134 00:43:23,561 --> 00:43:25,528 HERE WATCHING A SINGLE MOTHER SELL HER BLOOD FOR DIAPER MONEY. >> MISSISSIPPI REPUBLICAN 1135 00:43:25,530 --> 00:43:27,463 SELL HER BLOOD FOR DIAPER MONEY. >> MISSISSIPPI REPUBLICAN SENATOR CINDY HYDE SMITH BLOCKED 1136 00:43:27,465 --> 00:43:31,167 >> MISSISSIPPI REPUBLICAN SENATOR CINDY HYDE SMITH BLOCKED A BILL THAT WOULD PROTECT ACCESS 1137 00:43:31,169 --> 00:43:34,403 SENATOR CINDY HYDE SMITH BLOCKED A BILL THAT WOULD PROTECT ACCESS TO IN VITRO VERTLIZATION BECAUSE 1138 00:43:34,405 --> 00:43:36,405 A BILL THAT WOULD PROTECT ACCESS TO IN VITRO VERTLIZATION BECAUSE AS THEY SAY IN MISSISSIPPI, IF 1139 00:43:36,407 --> 00:43:38,140 TO IN VITRO VERTLIZATION BECAUSE AS THEY SAY IN MISSISSIPPI, IF YOU'RE HAVING TROUBLE 1140 00:43:38,142 --> 00:43:39,809 AS THEY SAY IN MISSISSIPPI, IF YOU'RE HAVING TROUBLE CONCEIVING, JUST TRY WITH A 1141 00:43:39,811 --> 00:43:41,177 YOU'RE HAVING TROUBLE CONCEIVING, JUST TRY WITH A DIFFERENT COUSIN. 1142 00:43:41,179 --> 00:43:43,379 CONCEIVING, JUST TRY WITH A DIFFERENT COUSIN. AFTER NIKKI HALEY'S POOR SHOWING 1143 00:43:43,381 --> 00:43:44,447 DIFFERENT COUSIN. AFTER NIKKI HALEY'S POOR SHOWING IN MICHIGAN, PRESSURE IS 1144 00:43:44,449 --> 00:43:45,715 AFTER NIKKI HALEY'S POOR SHOWING IN MICHIGAN, PRESSURE IS MOUNTING FOR HER TO DROP OUT OF 1145 00:43:45,717 --> 00:43:47,717 IN MICHIGAN, PRESSURE IS MOUNTING FOR HER TO DROP OUT OF THE RACE, BUT MOSTLY BECAUSE THE 1146 00:43:47,719 --> 00:43:52,054 MOUNTING FOR HER TO DROP OUT OF THE RACE, BUT MOSTLY BECAUSE THE DISHES ARE PILING UP AT HOME. 1147 00:43:52,056 --> 00:43:53,789 THE RACE, BUT MOSTLY BECAUSE THE DISHES ARE PILING UP AT HOME. THANK YOU. 1148 00:43:53,791 --> 00:43:54,590 DISHES ARE PILING UP AT HOME. THANK YOU. THANK YOU. 1149 00:43:54,592 --> 00:43:56,225 THANK YOU. THANK YOU. >> PRESIDENT BIDEN WENT TO 1150 00:43:56,227 --> 00:43:58,060 THANK YOU. >> PRESIDENT BIDEN WENT TO WALTER REID MEDICAL CENTER FOR 1151 00:43:58,062 --> 00:44:00,096 >> PRESIDENT BIDEN WENT TO WALTER REID MEDICAL CENTER FOR HIS ANNUAL PHYSICAL. 1152 00:44:00,098 --> 00:44:03,799 WALTER REID MEDICAL CENTER FOR HIS ANNUAL PHYSICAL. DOCTORS SAID BIDEN WAS FIT AS A 1153 00:44:03,801 --> 00:44:04,867 HIS ANNUAL PHYSICAL. DOCTORS SAID BIDEN WAS FIT AS A FIDDLE IN THAT HE'S OLD-TIMEY 1154 00:44:04,869 --> 00:44:07,103 DOCTORS SAID BIDEN WAS FIT AS A FIDDLE IN THAT HE'S OLD-TIMEY AND HELD TOGETHER BY STRINGS. 1155 00:44:07,105 --> 00:44:10,039 FIDDLE IN THAT HE'S OLD-TIMEY AND HELD TOGETHER BY STRINGS. >> IN AN INTERVIEW, SENATOR MITT 1156 00:44:10,041 --> 00:44:12,608 AND HELD TOGETHER BY STRINGS. >> IN AN INTERVIEW, SENATOR MITT ROMNEY SAID HE WILL NOT VOTE FOR 1157 00:44:12,610 --> 00:44:13,609 >> IN AN INTERVIEW, SENATOR MITT ROMNEY SAID HE WILL NOT VOTE FOR DONALD TRUMP OVER JOE BIDEN. 1158 00:44:13,611 --> 00:44:14,477 ROMNEY SAID HE WILL NOT VOTE FOR DONALD TRUMP OVER JOE BIDEN. SOME OF YOU MAY REMEMBER MITT 1159 00:44:14,479 --> 00:44:15,945 DONALD TRUMP OVER JOE BIDEN. SOME OF YOU MAY REMEMBER MITT ROMNEY. 1160 00:44:15,947 --> 00:44:20,750 SOME OF YOU MAY REMEMBER MITT ROMNEY. [ LAUGHTER ] 1161 00:44:20,752 --> 00:44:22,752 ROMNEY. [ LAUGHTER ] >> WELL, GUYS, MY PRAYERS HAVE 1162 00:44:22,754 --> 00:44:25,254 [ LAUGHTER ] >> WELL, GUYS, MY PRAYERS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED. 1163 00:44:25,256 --> 00:44:26,722 >> WELL, GUYS, MY PRAYERS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED. ABC HAS OFFICIALLY ANNOUNCED 1164 00:44:26,724 --> 00:44:28,924 BEEN ANSWERED. ABC HAS OFFICIALLY ANNOUNCED THEY'LL BE MAKING A SEASON OF 1165 00:44:28,926 --> 00:44:30,559 ABC HAS OFFICIALLY ANNOUNCED THEY'LL BE MAKING A SEASON OF THE GOLDEN BACHELORETTE. 1166 00:44:30,561 --> 00:44:33,462 THEY'LL BE MAKING A SEASON OF THE GOLDEN BACHELORETTE. HERE TO PROVIDE TIPS ON HAVING 1167 00:44:33,464 --> 00:44:35,831 THE GOLDEN BACHELORETTE. HERE TO PROVIDE TIPS ON HAVING CONFIDENCE AT ANY AGE IS A WOMAN 1168 00:44:35,833 --> 00:44:37,600 HERE TO PROVIDE TIPS ON HAVING CONFIDENCE AT ANY AGE IS A WOMAN THAT'S AGING GRACEFULLY. 1169 00:44:37,602 --> 00:44:38,267 CONFIDENCE AT ANY AGE IS A WOMAN THAT'S AGING GRACEFULLY. >> YEAH. 1170 00:44:38,269 --> 00:44:38,634 THAT'S AGING GRACEFULLY. >> YEAH. ALL RIGHT. 1171 00:44:38,636 --> 00:44:39,535 >> YEAH. ALL RIGHT. THAT'S RIGHT, COLIN. 1172 00:44:39,537 --> 00:44:41,337 ALL RIGHT. THAT'S RIGHT, COLIN. I'M NOT AFRAID TO SAY I'M A 1173 00:44:41,339 --> 00:44:43,739 THAT'S RIGHT, COLIN. I'M NOT AFRAID TO SAY I'M A LITTLE OLDER, A LITTLE WISER, 1174 00:44:43,741 --> 00:44:45,274 I'M NOT AFRAID TO SAY I'M A LITTLE OLDER, A LITTLE WISER, AND I'VE NEVER FELT BETTER. 1175 00:44:45,276 --> 00:44:46,008 LITTLE OLDER, A LITTLE WISER, AND I'VE NEVER FELT BETTER. GUESS MY AGE. 1176 00:44:46,010 --> 00:44:48,043 AND I'VE NEVER FELT BETTER. GUESS MY AGE. GO AHEAD, GUESS MY AGE. 1177 00:44:48,045 --> 00:44:49,545 GUESS MY AGE. GO AHEAD, GUESS MY AGE. >> NO THANK YOU. 1178 00:44:49,547 --> 00:44:50,146 GO AHEAD, GUESS MY AGE. >> NO THANK YOU. >> GREAT. 1179 00:44:50,148 --> 00:44:51,747 >> NO THANK YOU. >> GREAT. BECAUSE I ALWAYS SAY A WOMAN'S 1180 00:44:51,749 --> 00:44:54,083 >> GREAT. BECAUSE I ALWAYS SAY A WOMAN'S AGE IS LIKE A SPEED LIMIT, 1181 00:44:54,085 --> 00:44:54,784 BECAUSE I ALWAYS SAY A WOMAN'S AGE IS LIKE A SPEED LIMIT, IGNORE IT UNLESS YOU'RE IN A 1182 00:44:54,786 --> 00:44:59,288 AGE IS LIKE A SPEED LIMIT, IGNORE IT UNLESS YOU'RE IN A SCHOOL ZONE. 1183 00:44:59,290 --> 00:45:02,892 IGNORE IT UNLESS YOU'RE IN A SCHOOL ZONE. >> WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 1184 00:45:02,894 --> 00:45:04,827 SCHOOL ZONE. >> WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? ANYWAY, YOU'RE HERE TO SHARE 1185 00:45:04,829 --> 00:45:06,328 >> WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? ANYWAY, YOU'RE HERE TO SHARE TIPS FOR WOMEN TO FEEL CONFIDENT 1186 00:45:06,330 --> 00:45:07,196 ANYWAY, YOU'RE HERE TO SHARE TIPS FOR WOMEN TO FEEL CONFIDENT AT ANY AGE? 1187 00:45:07,198 --> 00:45:08,264 TIPS FOR WOMEN TO FEEL CONFIDENT AT ANY AGE? >> YEAH. 1188 00:45:08,266 --> 00:45:09,265 AT ANY AGE? >> YEAH. IT'S ALL ABOUT WORKING WITH WHAT 1189 00:45:09,267 --> 00:45:09,799 >> YEAH. IT'S ALL ABOUT WORKING WITH WHAT YOU GOT. 1190 00:45:09,801 --> 00:45:11,967 IT'S ALL ABOUT WORKING WITH WHAT YOU GOT. YOU KNOW, SOME OF THESE GIRLS 1191 00:45:11,969 --> 00:45:13,302 YOU GOT. YOU KNOW, SOME OF THESE GIRLS TODAY HAVE HAD SO MUCH WORK 1192 00:45:13,304 --> 00:45:13,602 YOU KNOW, SOME OF THESE GIRLS TODAY HAVE HAD SO MUCH WORK DONE. 1193 00:45:13,604 --> 00:45:17,173 TODAY HAVE HAD SO MUCH WORK DONE. I'M LIKE, WHAT ARE YOU? 1194 00:45:17,175 --> 00:45:18,007 DONE. I'M LIKE, WHAT ARE YOU? MY CONDO? 1195 00:45:18,009 --> 00:45:20,810 I'M LIKE, WHAT ARE YOU? MY CONDO? >> RIGHT. 1196 00:45:20,812 --> 00:45:22,611 MY CONDO? >> RIGHT. BECAUSE YOU'RE AGING GRACEFULLY. 1197 00:45:22,613 --> 00:45:23,679 >> RIGHT. BECAUSE YOU'RE AGING GRACEFULLY. >> EXACTLY. 1198 00:45:23,681 --> 00:45:26,549 BECAUSE YOU'RE AGING GRACEFULLY. >> EXACTLY. THAT'S WHY I JUST DO THE LITTLE 1199 00:45:26,551 --> 00:45:30,286 >> EXACTLY. THAT'S WHY I JUST DO THE LITTLE STUFF, LITTLE BOTOX HERE, LITTLE 1200 00:45:30,288 --> 00:45:31,921 THAT'S WHY I JUST DO THE LITTLE STUFF, LITTLE BOTOX HERE, LITTLE JUVEDERM HERE, MY EARS HAVE BEEN 1201 00:45:31,923 --> 00:45:33,956 STUFF, LITTLE BOTOX HERE, LITTLE JUVEDERM HERE, MY EARS HAVE BEEN LOWERED, AND MY BROWS ARE MY 1202 00:45:33,958 --> 00:45:34,290 JUVEDERM HERE, MY EARS HAVE BEEN LOWERED, AND MY BROWS ARE MY PUBES. 1203 00:45:34,292 --> 00:45:35,057 LOWERED, AND MY BROWS ARE MY PUBES. >> OH, MY GOD. 1204 00:45:35,059 --> 00:45:36,158 PUBES. >> OH, MY GOD. >> YOU DON'T GET IT. 1205 00:45:36,160 --> 00:45:36,926 >> OH, MY GOD. >> YOU DON'T GET IT. YOU'RE NOT A WOMAN. 1206 00:45:36,928 --> 00:45:38,894 >> YOU DON'T GET IT. YOU'RE NOT A WOMAN. >> I DON'T THINK I WANT TO GET 1207 00:45:38,896 --> 00:45:39,161 YOU'RE NOT A WOMAN. >> I DON'T THINK I WANT TO GET IT. 1208 00:45:39,163 --> 00:45:40,529 >> I DON'T THINK I WANT TO GET IT. WITH THE NEW SEASON OF THE SHOW 1209 00:45:40,531 --> 00:45:43,065 IT. WITH THE NEW SEASON OF THE SHOW COMING OUT, WHAT WOULD YOUR 1210 00:45:43,067 --> 00:45:45,868 WITH THE NEW SEASON OF THE SHOW COMING OUT, WHAT WOULD YOUR ADVICE BE FOR THE NEW GOLDEN 1211 00:45:45,870 --> 00:45:46,302 COMING OUT, WHAT WOULD YOUR ADVICE BE FOR THE NEW GOLDEN BACHELORETTE. 1212 00:45:46,304 --> 00:45:48,704 ADVICE BE FOR THE NEW GOLDEN BACHELORETTE. >> I ALWAYS SAY KEEP THEIR 1213 00:45:48,706 --> 00:45:51,740 BACHELORETTE. >> I ALWAYS SAY KEEP THEIR BELLIES FULL, THE GAME ON, AND 1214 00:45:51,742 --> 00:45:52,441 >> I ALWAYS SAY KEEP THEIR BELLIES FULL, THE GAME ON, AND DON'T WHINE. 1215 00:45:52,443 --> 00:45:53,409 BELLIES FULL, THE GAME ON, AND DON'T WHINE. >> THAT'S TERRIBLE ADVICE. 1216 00:45:53,411 --> 00:45:56,378 DON'T WHINE. >> THAT'S TERRIBLE ADVICE. >> AND IF YOU'RE GOING TO GET 1217 00:45:56,380 --> 00:45:57,479 >> THAT'S TERRIBLE ADVICE. >> AND IF YOU'RE GOING TO GET WORK DONE, BE LIKE MY CONDO, 1218 00:45:57,481 --> 00:45:58,681 >> AND IF YOU'RE GOING TO GET WORK DONE, BE LIKE MY CONDO, JUST OWN IT. 1219 00:45:58,683 --> 00:46:00,282 WORK DONE, BE LIKE MY CONDO, JUST OWN IT. SHOUTOUT TO MY CONDO. 1220 00:46:00,284 --> 00:46:03,552 JUST OWN IT. SHOUTOUT TO MY CONDO. SO WHEN I GET TWEAKS, I ADMIT 1221 00:46:03,554 --> 00:46:03,819 SHOUTOUT TO MY CONDO. SO WHEN I GET TWEAKS, I ADMIT IT. 1222 00:46:03,821 --> 00:46:05,788 SO WHEN I GET TWEAKS, I ADMIT IT. I'LL ADMIT, I'VE HAD THE JURY 1223 00:46:05,790 --> 00:46:08,157 IT. I'LL ADMIT, I'VE HAD THE JURY SEN TAKE A LITTLE OFF MY ASS AND 1224 00:46:08,159 --> 00:46:09,892 I'LL ADMIT, I'VE HAD THE JURY SEN TAKE A LITTLE OFF MY ASS AND PUT IT IN MY LIPS. 1225 00:46:09,894 --> 00:46:12,294 SEN TAKE A LITTLE OFF MY ASS AND PUT IT IN MY LIPS. BUT HE PROMISED IF I TAKE CRAP, 1226 00:46:12,296 --> 00:46:13,262 PUT IT IN MY LIPS. BUT HE PROMISED IF I TAKE CRAP, HE'LL PUT IT BACK. 1227 00:46:13,264 --> 00:46:16,432 BUT HE PROMISED IF I TAKE CRAP, HE'LL PUT IT BACK. SO FAR, NO CRAP. 1228 00:46:16,434 --> 00:46:19,168 HE'LL PUT IT BACK. SO FAR, NO CRAP. >> THAT'S GENUINELY DISGUSTING. 1229 00:46:19,170 --> 00:46:20,035 SO FAR, NO CRAP. >> THAT'S GENUINELY DISGUSTING. >> YOU DON'T GET IT. 1230 00:46:20,037 --> 00:46:22,171 >> THAT'S GENUINELY DISGUSTING. >> YOU DON'T GET IT. YOU'RE NOT A WOMAN. 1231 00:46:22,173 --> 00:46:25,541 >> YOU DON'T GET IT. YOU'RE NOT A WOMAN. PLASTIC SURGERY IS LIKE A JENGA 1232 00:46:25,543 --> 00:46:25,941 YOU'RE NOT A WOMAN. PLASTIC SURGERY IS LIKE A JENGA TOWER. 1233 00:46:25,943 --> 00:46:29,511 PLASTIC SURGERY IS LIKE A JENGA TOWER. TAKE A LITTLE OFF THE TOP, PUT 1234 00:46:29,513 --> 00:46:32,982 TOWER. TAKE A LITTLE OFF THE TOP, PUT IT ON THE BOTTOM SQUP IT ALL 1235 00:46:32,984 --> 00:46:33,682 TAKE A LITTLE OFF THE TOP, PUT IT ON THE BOTTOM SQUP IT ALL FALLS APART. 1236 00:46:33,684 --> 00:46:35,885 IT ON THE BOTTOM SQUP IT ALL FALLS APART. WHEN IT COMES TO MEN, JUST 1237 00:46:35,887 --> 00:46:37,720 FALLS APART. WHEN IT COMES TO MEN, JUST REMEMBER THESE TEN THINGS. 1238 00:46:37,722 --> 00:46:40,789 WHEN IT COMES TO MEN, JUST REMEMBER THESE TEN THINGS. KEEP THE FRIDGE STOCKED, FRIDGE 1239 00:46:40,791 --> 00:46:44,693 REMEMBER THESE TEN THINGS. KEEP THE FRIDGE STOCKED, FRIDGE FULL, LAUGH AT HIS JOKES, DON'T 1240 00:46:44,695 --> 00:46:45,761 KEEP THE FRIDGE STOCKED, FRIDGE FULL, LAUGH AT HIS JOKES, DON'T VOTE, MAKE LUNCH, AND TAKE IT 1241 00:46:45,763 --> 00:46:47,396 FULL, LAUGH AT HIS JOKES, DON'T VOTE, MAKE LUNCH, AND TAKE IT FROM ME, DON'T SLEEP WITH HIS 1242 00:46:47,398 --> 00:46:47,730 VOTE, MAKE LUNCH, AND TAKE IT FROM ME, DON'T SLEEP WITH HIS SON. 1243 00:46:47,732 --> 00:46:49,965 FROM ME, DON'T SLEEP WITH HIS SON. >> DID YOU SLEEP WITH SOMEONE'S 1244 00:46:49,967 --> 00:46:50,232 SON. >> DID YOU SLEEP WITH SOMEONE'S SON? 1245 00:46:50,234 --> 00:46:51,533 >> DID YOU SLEEP WITH SOMEONE'S SON? >> IT'S SO SAD. 1246 00:46:51,535 --> 00:46:53,302 SON? >> IT'S SO SAD. SOME OF THESE GIRLS ARE FLYING 1247 00:46:53,304 --> 00:46:55,271 >> IT'S SO SAD. SOME OF THESE GIRLS ARE FLYING ALL THE WAY TO BRAZIL TO GET A 1248 00:46:55,273 --> 00:46:57,573 SOME OF THESE GIRLS ARE FLYING ALL THE WAY TO BRAZIL TO GET A NEW BOOTY WHEN YOU CAN DRIVE 20 1249 00:46:57,575 --> 00:46:59,208 ALL THE WAY TO BRAZIL TO GET A NEW BOOTY WHEN YOU CAN DRIVE 20 MINUTES TO THE MECHANIC FOR A 1250 00:46:59,210 --> 00:47:00,042 NEW BOOTY WHEN YOU CAN DRIVE 20 MINUTES TO THE MECHANIC FOR A NIPPLE REPLACEMENT. 1251 00:47:00,044 --> 00:47:02,011 MINUTES TO THE MECHANIC FOR A NIPPLE REPLACEMENT. >> I'M SORRY, A NIPPLE 1252 00:47:02,013 --> 00:47:02,411 NIPPLE REPLACEMENT. >> I'M SORRY, A NIPPLE REPLACEMENT? 1253 00:47:02,413 --> 00:47:03,245 >> I'M SORRY, A NIPPLE REPLACEMENT? >> THAT'S RIGHT. 1254 00:47:03,247 --> 00:47:05,247 REPLACEMENT? >> THAT'S RIGHT. AND THEY CAME FROM A GUY, SO 1255 00:47:05,249 --> 00:47:07,449 >> THAT'S RIGHT. AND THEY CAME FROM A GUY, SO NOW, I CAN SHOW MY RACK ON TV. 1256 00:47:07,451 --> 00:47:09,485 AND THEY CAME FROM A GUY, SO NOW, I CAN SHOW MY RACK ON TV. >> PLEASE LEAVE YOUR SHIRT ON. 1257 00:47:09,487 --> 00:47:12,021 NOW, I CAN SHOW MY RACK ON TV. >> PLEASE LEAVE YOUR SHIRT ON. I HAVE TO SAY FOR SOMEONE WHO'S 1258 00:47:12,023 --> 00:47:13,622 >> PLEASE LEAVE YOUR SHIRT ON. I HAVE TO SAY FOR SOMEONE WHO'S AGING GRACEFULLY, YOU'VE HAD A 1259 00:47:13,624 --> 00:47:14,757 I HAVE TO SAY FOR SOMEONE WHO'S AGING GRACEFULLY, YOU'VE HAD A LOT OF WORK DONE. 1260 00:47:14,759 --> 00:47:16,725 AGING GRACEFULLY, YOU'VE HAD A LOT OF WORK DONE. >> IT'S NOT WORK IF IT'S 1261 00:47:16,727 --> 00:47:17,359 LOT OF WORK DONE. >> IT'S NOT WORK IF IT'S WORKING. 1262 00:47:17,361 --> 00:47:19,061 >> IT'S NOT WORK IF IT'S WORKING. SHOUTOUT TO MY CONDO. 1263 00:47:19,063 --> 00:47:19,461 WORKING. SHOUTOUT TO MY CONDO. ALL RIGHT. 1264 00:47:19,463 --> 00:47:20,362 SHOUTOUT TO MY CONDO. ALL RIGHT. BY THE WAY, THESE ARE DONOR 1265 00:47:20,364 --> 00:47:23,098 ALL RIGHT. BY THE WAY, THESE ARE DONOR EYES. 1266 00:47:23,100 --> 00:47:24,867 BY THE WAY, THESE ARE DONOR EYES. >> THEY'RE DONOR EYES? 1267 00:47:24,869 --> 00:47:26,135 EYES. >> THEY'RE DONOR EYES? >> I KNOW, RIGHT? 1268 00:47:26,137 --> 00:47:28,637 >> THEY'RE DONOR EYES? >> I KNOW, RIGHT? WHEN IT COMES TO GUYS, JUST 1269 00:47:28,639 --> 00:47:32,841 >> I KNOW, RIGHT? WHEN IT COMES TO GUYS, JUST REMEMBER THESE 40 THINGS. 1270 00:47:32,843 --> 00:47:35,344 WHEN IT COMES TO GUYS, JUST REMEMBER THESE 40 THINGS. TV IN THE BED BEDROOM, BEER 1271 00:47:35,346 --> 00:47:37,579 REMEMBER THESE 40 THINGS. TV IN THE BED BEDROOM, BEER FRIDGE IN THE BATHROOM, AND IF 1272 00:47:37,581 --> 00:47:39,081 TV IN THE BED BEDROOM, BEER FRIDGE IN THE BATHROOM, AND IF YOU'RE GOING TO SLEEP WITH HIS 1273 00:47:39,083 --> 00:47:41,050 FRIDGE IN THE BATHROOM, AND IF YOU'RE GOING TO SLEEP WITH HIS SON, DON'T FALL IN LOVE. 1274 00:47:41,052 --> 00:47:42,184 YOU'RE GOING TO SLEEP WITH HIS SON, DON'T FALL IN LOVE. GUESS MY AGE. 1275 00:47:42,186 --> 00:47:43,852 SON, DON'T FALL IN LOVE. GUESS MY AGE. >> I DON'T KNOW. 1276 00:47:43,854 --> 00:47:44,119 GUESS MY AGE. >> I DON'T KNOW. 63. 1277 00:47:44,121 --> 00:47:47,256 >> I DON'T KNOW. 63. >> FLIP THE NUMBERS AND ADD A 0. 1278 00:47:47,258 --> 00:47:49,058 63. >> FLIP THE NUMBERS AND ADD A 0. >> SO 360? 1279 00:47:49,060 --> 00:47:50,659 >> FLIP THE NUMBERS AND ADD A 0. >> SO 360? >> OH, A 360? 1280 00:47:50,661 --> 00:47:52,828 >> SO 360? >> OH, A 360? I THOUGHT YOU WOULD NEVER ASK. 1281 00:47:52,830 --> 00:47:58,667 >> OH, A 360? I THOUGHT YOU WOULD NEVER ASK. >> OH, MY GOD. 1282 00:47:58,669 --> 00:48:01,103 I THOUGHT YOU WOULD NEVER ASK. >> OH, MY GOD. ARE THOSE BINDER CLIPS? 1283 00:48:01,105 --> 00:48:02,838 >> OH, MY GOD. ARE THOSE BINDER CLIPS? >> OH, YOU KNOW WHAT? 1284 00:48:02,840 --> 00:48:06,241 ARE THOSE BINDER CLIPS? >> OH, YOU KNOW WHAT? MY PLASTIC SURGEON WORKS AT 1285 00:48:06,243 --> 00:48:06,709 >> OH, YOU KNOW WHAT? MY PLASTIC SURGEON WORKS AT OFFICE MAX. 1286 00:48:06,711 --> 00:48:08,844 MY PLASTIC SURGEON WORKS AT OFFICE MAX. >> A WOMAN AGING GRACEFULLY, 1287 00:48:08,846 --> 00:48:09,211 OFFICE MAX. >> A WOMAN AGING GRACEFULLY, EVERYONE. 1288 00:48:09,213 --> 00:48:09,712 >> A WOMAN AGING GRACEFULLY, EVERYONE. >> I LIED. 1289 00:48:09,714 --> 00:48:14,249 EVERYONE. >> I LIED. I RENT MY CONDO. 1290 00:48:14,251 --> 00:48:16,919 >> I LIED. I RENT MY CONDO. >> A NEW REPORT SHOWS THAT SOUTH 1291 00:48:16,921 --> 00:48:19,688 I RENT MY CONDO. >> A NEW REPORT SHOWS THAT SOUTH KOREA NOW HAS THE WORLD'S LOWEST 1292 00:48:19,690 --> 00:48:22,891 >> A NEW REPORT SHOWS THAT SOUTH KOREA NOW HAS THE WORLD'S LOWEST BIRTH RATE, DESPITE THE EFFORTS 1293 00:48:22,893 --> 00:48:25,661 KOREA NOW HAS THE WORLD'S LOWEST BIRTH RATE, DESPITE THE EFFORTS OF SOUTH KOREAN ENTERTAINER, 1294 00:48:25,663 --> 00:48:29,732 BIRTH RATE, DESPITE THE EFFORTS OF SOUTH KOREAN ENTERTAINER, NICK CANN UN. 1295 00:48:29,734 --> 00:48:31,700 OF SOUTH KOREAN ENTERTAINER, NICK CANN UN. NICK CANN UN. 1296 00:48:31,702 --> 00:48:34,837 NICK CANN UN. NICK CANN UN. >> I HEARD YOU. 1297 00:48:34,839 --> 00:48:37,239 NICK CANN UN. >> I HEARD YOU. A NEW TREND AMONG PARENTS IS TO 1298 00:48:37,241 --> 00:48:40,275 >> I HEARD YOU. A NEW TREND AMONG PARENTS IS TO CHOOSE BABY NAMES THAT SOUND 1299 00:48:40,277 --> 00:48:41,710 A NEW TREND AMONG PARENTS IS TO CHOOSE BABY NAMES THAT SOUND COOL AS TIKTOK HANDLES. 1300 00:48:41,712 --> 00:48:44,546 CHOOSE BABY NAMES THAT SOUND COOL AS TIKTOK HANDLES. GREAT NEWS FOR LITTLE BABY TRICK 1301 00:48:44,548 --> 00:48:48,617 COOL AS TIKTOK HANDLES. GREAT NEWS FOR LITTLE BABY TRICK SHOT COVID HOAX. 1302 00:48:48,619 --> 00:48:50,519 GREAT NEWS FOR LITTLE BABY TRICK SHOT COVID HOAX. FLACO, THE BELOVED OWL THAT 1303 00:48:50,521 --> 00:48:51,954 SHOT COVID HOAX. FLACO, THE BELOVED OWL THAT ESCAPED FROM THE CENTRAL PARK 1304 00:48:51,956 --> 00:48:54,189 FLACO, THE BELOVED OWL THAT ESCAPED FROM THE CENTRAL PARK ZOO DIED LAST WEEK AFTER HE FLEW 1305 00:48:54,191 --> 00:48:57,026 ESCAPED FROM THE CENTRAL PARK ZOO DIED LAST WEEK AFTER HE FLEW INTO A BUILDING. 1306 00:48:57,028 --> 00:48:58,761 ZOO DIED LAST WEEK AFTER HE FLEW INTO A BUILDING. FLACO WILL BE REMEMBERED FOR HIS 1307 00:48:58,763 --> 00:49:04,666 INTO A BUILDING. FLACO WILL BE REMEMBERED FOR HIS FAMOUS LAST WORDS, OH, COOL, 1308 00:49:04,668 --> 00:49:05,100 FLACO WILL BE REMEMBERED FOR HIS FAMOUS LAST WORDS, OH, COOL, ANOTHER OWL. 1309 00:49:05,102 --> 00:49:08,337 FAMOUS LAST WORDS, OH, COOL, ANOTHER OWL. >> STATEN ISLAND OFFICIALS ARE 1310 00:49:08,339 --> 00:49:11,273 ANOTHER OWL. >> STATEN ISLAND OFFICIALS ARE HOLDING A SEPARATE ST. PATRICK'S 1311 00:49:11,275 --> 00:49:13,342 >> STATEN ISLAND OFFICIALS ARE HOLDING A SEPARATE ST. PATRICK'S DAY PARADE THAT WILL WELCOME 1312 00:49:13,344 --> 00:49:17,312 HOLDING A SEPARATE ST. PATRICK'S DAY PARADE THAT WILL WELCOME LBGTQ GROUPS WHO WERE BANNED 1313 00:49:17,314 --> 00:49:17,946 DAY PARADE THAT WILL WELCOME LBGTQ GROUPS WHO WERE BANNED FROM THE OFFICIAL PARADE. 1314 00:49:17,948 --> 00:49:20,215 LBGTQ GROUPS WHO WERE BANNED FROM THE OFFICIAL PARADE. SADLY ON STATEN ISLAND, LBGTQ 1315 00:49:20,217 --> 00:49:22,051 FROM THE OFFICIAL PARADE. SADLY ON STATEN ISLAND, LBGTQ STANDS FOR LET'S GO BULLY THE 1316 00:49:22,053 --> 00:49:22,384 SADLY ON STATEN ISLAND, LBGTQ STANDS FOR LET'S GO BULLY THE QUEERS. 1317 00:49:22,386 --> 00:49:24,053 STANDS FOR LET'S GO BULLY THE QUEERS. I KNOW. 1318 00:49:24,055 --> 00:49:25,254 QUEERS. I KNOW. THAT'S A -- THAT'S NOT WHAT IT 1319 00:49:25,256 --> 00:49:28,524 I KNOW. THAT'S A -- THAT'S NOT WHAT IT SHOULD STAND FOR. 1320 00:49:28,526 --> 00:49:31,260 THAT'S A -- THAT'S NOT WHAT IT SHOULD STAND FOR. >> I FEEL ATTACKED. 1321 00:49:31,262 --> 00:49:34,129 SHOULD STAND FOR. >> I FEEL ATTACKED. A NEW STUDY CLAIMS FREMONT, 1322 00:49:34,131 --> 00:49:35,798 >> I FEEL ATTACKED. A NEW STUDY CLAIMS FREMONT, CALIFORNIA IS THE HAPPIEST CITY 1323 00:49:35,800 --> 00:49:37,633 A NEW STUDY CLAIMS FREMONT, CALIFORNIA IS THE HAPPIEST CITY IN AMERICA, WHILE THE SADDEST 1324 00:49:37,635 --> 00:49:40,002 CALIFORNIA IS THE HAPPIEST CITY IN AMERICA, WHILE THE SADDEST CITY IN AMERICA IS ONCE AGAIN 1325 00:49:40,004 --> 00:49:42,404 IN AMERICA, WHILE THE SADDEST CITY IN AMERICA IS ONCE AGAIN PUPPY GRAVE, INDIANA. 1326 00:49:42,406 --> 00:49:44,540 CITY IN AMERICA IS ONCE AGAIN PUPPY GRAVE, INDIANA. WHICH INCIDENTALLY IS THE 1327 00:49:44,542 --> 00:49:45,274 PUPPY GRAVE, INDIANA. WHICH INCIDENTALLY IS THE FAVORITE VACATION SPOT OF MITCH 1328 00:49:45,276 --> 00:49:49,445 WHICH INCIDENTALLY IS THE FAVORITE VACATION SPOT OF MITCH McCONNELL. 1329 00:49:49,447 --> 00:49:52,414 FAVORITE VACATION SPOT OF MITCH McCONNELL. >> MARCH IS WOMEN'S HISTORY 1330 00:49:52,416 --> 00:49:52,948 McCONNELL. >> MARCH IS WOMEN'S HISTORY MONTH, WHICH IS -- 1331 00:49:52,950 --> 00:49:57,252 >> MARCH IS WOMEN'S HISTORY MONTH, WHICH IS -- [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 1332 00:49:57,254 --> 00:49:58,487 MONTH, WHICH IS -- [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] -- WHICH IS ALWAYS NICE, EXCEPT 1333 00:49:58,489 --> 00:49:59,354 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] -- WHICH IS ALWAYS NICE, EXCEPT FOR THAT ONE WEEK WHERE IT'S A 1334 00:49:59,356 --> 00:50:07,896 -- WHICH IS ALWAYS NICE, EXCEPT FOR THAT ONE WEEK WHERE IT'S A HUGE BITCH. 1335 00:50:07,898 --> 00:50:09,198 FOR THAT ONE WEEK WHERE IT'S A HUGE BITCH. >> REMEMBER WHEN YOU CHEERED FOR 1336 00:50:09,200 --> 00:50:14,169 HUGE BITCH. >> REMEMBER WHEN YOU CHEERED FOR THE BEGINNING? 1337 00:50:14,171 --> 00:50:15,337 >> REMEMBER WHEN YOU CHEERED FOR THE BEGINNING? KFC HAS INTRODUCED A NEW ITEM 1338 00:50:15,339 --> 00:50:17,606 THE BEGINNING? KFC HAS INTRODUCED A NEW ITEM THAT'S A COMBO OF FRIED CHICKEN 1339 00:50:17,608 --> 00:50:21,510 KFC HAS INTRODUCED A NEW ITEM THAT'S A COMBO OF FRIED CHICKEN AND PIZZA CALLED CHEETZA THOUGH 1340 00:50:21,512 --> 00:50:23,579 THAT'S A COMBO OF FRIED CHICKEN AND PIZZA CALLED CHEETZA THOUGH THEY WARN IT COULD CAUSE A 1341 00:50:23,581 --> 00:50:25,247 AND PIZZA CALLED CHEETZA THOUGH THEY WARN IT COULD CAUSE A REACTION CALLED VOMIRRHEA. 1342 00:50:25,249 --> 00:50:27,449 THEY WARN IT COULD CAUSE A REACTION CALLED VOMIRRHEA. >> CHARLOTTE, A ROUND STING RAY 1343 00:50:27,451 --> 00:50:32,154 REACTION CALLED VOMIRRHEA. >> CHARLOTTE, A ROUND STING RAY THAT'S LIVED FOR YEARS WITHOUT A 1344 00:50:32,156 --> 00:50:33,155 >> CHARLOTTE, A ROUND STING RAY THAT'S LIVED FOR YEARS WITHOUT A MALE COMPANION IS PREGNANT 1345 00:50:33,157 --> 00:50:34,590 THAT'S LIVED FOR YEARS WITHOUT A MALE COMPANION IS PREGNANT MAKING PEOPLE WONDER WHO'S THE 1346 00:50:34,592 --> 00:50:36,658 MALE COMPANION IS PREGNANT MAKING PEOPLE WONDER WHO'S THE FATHER AND HOW DID THIS HAPPEN. 1347 00:50:36,660 --> 00:50:38,627 MAKING PEOPLE WONDER WHO'S THE FATHER AND HOW DID THIS HAPPEN. HERE TO COMMENT IS CHARLOTTE, 1348 00:50:38,629 --> 00:50:39,795 FATHER AND HOW DID THIS HAPPEN. HERE TO COMMENT IS CHARLOTTE, THE PREGNANT STING RAY. 1349 00:50:39,797 --> 00:50:42,064 HERE TO COMMENT IS CHARLOTTE, THE PREGNANT STING RAY. >> MICHAEL, MICHAEL, MICHAEL, 1350 00:50:42,066 --> 00:50:43,932 THE PREGNANT STING RAY. >> MICHAEL, MICHAEL, MICHAEL, BOY DO I HAVE SOME NEWS FOR YOU. 1351 00:50:43,934 --> 00:50:47,369 >> MICHAEL, MICHAEL, MICHAEL, BOY DO I HAVE SOME NEWS FOR YOU. YOU GON' BE A DADDY! 1352 00:50:47,371 --> 00:50:49,271 BOY DO I HAVE SOME NEWS FOR YOU. YOU GON' BE A DADDY! >> WHAT? 1353 00:50:49,273 --> 00:50:49,705 YOU GON' BE A DADDY! >> WHAT? STOP PLAYING. 1354 00:50:49,707 --> 00:50:50,706 >> WHAT? STOP PLAYING. >> NO, YOU STOP PLAYING. 1355 00:50:50,708 --> 00:50:52,374 STOP PLAYING. >> NO, YOU STOP PLAYING. I'M A LITTLE ON EDGE RIGHT NOW. 1356 00:50:52,376 --> 00:50:55,043 >> NO, YOU STOP PLAYING. I'M A LITTLE ON EDGE RIGHT NOW. ALL THIS ATTENTION IS A LOT FOR 1357 00:50:55,045 --> 00:50:55,377 I'M A LITTLE ON EDGE RIGHT NOW. ALL THIS ATTENTION IS A LOT FOR ME. 1358 00:50:55,379 --> 00:50:56,745 ALL THIS ATTENTION IS A LOT FOR ME. MAYBE THIS FAME STUFF IS NORMAL 1359 00:50:56,747 --> 00:50:59,248 ME. MAYBE THIS FAME STUFF IS NORMAL FOR YOU, BUT YOU DO NOT WANT TO 1360 00:50:59,250 --> 00:51:00,782 MAYBE THIS FAME STUFF IS NORMAL FOR YOU, BUT YOU DO NOT WANT TO BE A FAMOUS ANIMAL. 1361 00:51:00,784 --> 00:51:05,320 FOR YOU, BUT YOU DO NOT WANT TO BE A FAMOUS ANIMAL. YOU SEEN HOW THEY DID HARAMBAY 1362 00:51:05,322 --> 00:51:05,621 BE A FAMOUS ANIMAL. YOU SEEN HOW THEY DID HARAMBAY RIGHT? 1363 00:51:05,623 --> 00:51:07,890 YOU SEEN HOW THEY DID HARAMBAY RIGHT? >> PEOPLE ARE CONFUSED HOW YOU 1364 00:51:07,892 --> 00:51:08,790 RIGHT? >> PEOPLE ARE CONFUSED HOW YOU GOT PREGNANT. 1365 00:51:08,792 --> 00:51:10,492 >> PEOPLE ARE CONFUSED HOW YOU GOT PREGNANT. >> DO YOU KNOW HOW INSULTING IT 1366 00:51:10,494 --> 00:51:12,261 GOT PREGNANT. >> DO YOU KNOW HOW INSULTING IT IS TO HAVE SOMEONE LOOK AT YOU 1367 00:51:12,263 --> 00:51:14,196 >> DO YOU KNOW HOW INSULTING IT IS TO HAVE SOMEONE LOOK AT YOU AND SAY WHO GOT YOU PREGNANT? 1368 00:51:14,198 --> 00:51:16,465 IS TO HAVE SOMEONE LOOK AT YOU AND SAY WHO GOT YOU PREGNANT? I'LL TELL YOU WHO, MR. "WEEKEND 1369 00:51:16,467 --> 00:51:18,300 AND SAY WHO GOT YOU PREGNANT? I'LL TELL YOU WHO, MR. "WEEKEND UPDATE" AND HIS LATEX ALLERGY. 1370 00:51:18,302 --> 00:51:20,169 I'LL TELL YOU WHO, MR. "WEEKEND UPDATE" AND HIS LATEX ALLERGY. >> WE'RE GOING TO STOP WITH 1371 00:51:20,171 --> 00:51:20,869 UPDATE" AND HIS LATEX ALLERGY. >> WE'RE GOING TO STOP WITH THAT, OKAY? 1372 00:51:20,871 --> 00:51:22,905 >> WE'RE GOING TO STOP WITH THAT, OKAY? SOME PEOPLE THINK THAT YOU GOT 1373 00:51:22,907 --> 00:51:24,907 THAT, OKAY? SOME PEOPLE THINK THAT YOU GOT PREGNANT VIA IMMACULATE 1374 00:51:24,909 --> 00:51:25,307 SOME PEOPLE THINK THAT YOU GOT PREGNANT VIA IMMACULATE CONCEPTION. 1375 00:51:25,309 --> 00:51:27,576 PREGNANT VIA IMMACULATE CONCEPTION. >> YEAH, IT WAS IMMACULATE IN 1376 00:51:27,578 --> 00:51:30,045 CONCEPTION. >> YEAH, IT WAS IMMACULATE IN THAT YOU IMMACK LATED, THEN I 1377 00:51:30,047 --> 00:51:32,548 >> YEAH, IT WAS IMMACULATE IN THAT YOU IMMACK LATED, THEN I IMMACK LATED THREE TIMES BACK TO 1378 00:51:32,550 --> 00:51:32,881 THAT YOU IMMACK LATED, THEN I IMMACK LATED THREE TIMES BACK TO BACK. 1379 00:51:32,883 --> 00:51:34,583 IMMACK LATED THREE TIMES BACK TO BACK. I WOULD SAY YOU BROKE MY BACK, 1380 00:51:34,585 --> 00:51:38,086 BACK. I WOULD SAY YOU BROKE MY BACK, BUT I AIN'T GOT NO BONES. 1381 00:51:38,088 --> 00:51:40,822 I WOULD SAY YOU BROKE MY BACK, BUT I AIN'T GOT NO BONES. >> I DON'T LIKE THIS. 1382 00:51:40,824 --> 00:51:42,391 BUT I AIN'T GOT NO BONES. >> I DON'T LIKE THIS. SO THIS IS A VIRGIN CONCEPTION? 1383 00:51:42,393 --> 00:51:44,893 >> I DON'T LIKE THIS. SO THIS IS A VIRGIN CONCEPTION? >> MICHAEL, I AIN'T BEEN A 1384 00:51:44,895 --> 00:51:46,295 SO THIS IS A VIRGIN CONCEPTION? >> MICHAEL, I AIN'T BEEN A VIRGIN SINCE I WAS TWO, AND 1385 00:51:46,297 --> 00:51:48,363 >> MICHAEL, I AIN'T BEEN A VIRGIN SINCE I WAS TWO, AND THAT'S LATE FOR A STING RAY. 1386 00:51:48,365 --> 00:51:50,799 VIRGIN SINCE I WAS TWO, AND THAT'S LATE FOR A STING RAY. IF YOU MUST KNOW, I GOT A 1387 00:51:50,801 --> 00:51:51,433 THAT'S LATE FOR A STING RAY. IF YOU MUST KNOW, I GOT A FOUR-DIGIT BODY COUNT. 1388 00:51:51,435 --> 00:51:52,201 IF YOU MUST KNOW, I GOT A FOUR-DIGIT BODY COUNT. >> HOLD ON. 1389 00:51:52,203 --> 00:51:53,035 FOUR-DIGIT BODY COUNT. >> HOLD ON. FOUR DIGITS? 1390 00:51:53,037 --> 00:51:55,304 >> HOLD ON. FOUR DIGITS? >> SO YOU JEALOUS? 1391 00:51:55,306 --> 00:51:58,574 FOUR DIGITS? >> SO YOU JEALOUS? YOU DON'T NEED TO BE INSECURE, 1392 00:51:58,576 --> 00:51:58,974 >> SO YOU JEALOUS? YOU DON'T NEED TO BE INSECURE, BOO. 1393 00:51:58,976 --> 00:52:00,976 YOU DON'T NEED TO BE INSECURE, BOO. YOU PUT IT DOWN BETTER THAN ALL 1394 00:52:00,978 --> 00:52:01,944 BOO. YOU PUT IT DOWN BETTER THAN ALL THEM FISH. 1395 00:52:01,946 --> 00:52:04,046 YOU PUT IT DOWN BETTER THAN ALL THEM FISH. AFTER YOU SWUNG BY MY TANK, 1396 00:52:04,048 --> 00:52:05,914 THEM FISH. AFTER YOU SWUNG BY MY TANK, LET'S JUST SAY A BITCH COULDN'T 1397 00:52:05,916 --> 00:52:06,982 AFTER YOU SWUNG BY MY TANK, LET'S JUST SAY A BITCH COULDN'T SWIM STRAIGHT FOR WEEKS. 1398 00:52:06,984 --> 00:52:10,986 LET'S JUST SAY A BITCH COULDN'T SWIM STRAIGHT FOR WEEKS. >> CHARLOTTE, HAVE YOU BEEN NEAR 1399 00:52:10,988 --> 00:52:11,486 SWIM STRAIGHT FOR WEEKS. >> CHARLOTTE, HAVE YOU BEEN NEAR A MAIL STING RAY? 1400 00:52:11,488 --> 00:52:15,257 >> CHARLOTTE, HAVE YOU BEEN NEAR A MAIL STING RAY? >> OH, I'VE BEEN NEAR MALES, BUT 1401 00:52:15,259 --> 00:52:16,892 A MAIL STING RAY? >> OH, I'VE BEEN NEAR MALES, BUT NONE OF THEM BEEN MEN. 1402 00:52:16,894 --> 00:52:20,162 >> OH, I'VE BEEN NEAR MALES, BUT NONE OF THEM BEEN MEN. NONE OF THEM BEEN MR. MICHAEL 1403 00:52:20,164 --> 00:52:20,462 NONE OF THEM BEEN MEN. NONE OF THEM BEEN MR. MICHAEL CHE. 1404 00:52:20,464 --> 00:52:22,231 NONE OF THEM BEEN MR. MICHAEL CHE. >> CHARLOTTE, RELAX. 1405 00:52:22,233 --> 00:52:24,166 CHE. >> CHARLOTTE, RELAX. DON'T FEMALE STING RAYS MATE 1406 00:52:24,168 --> 00:52:26,235 >> CHARLOTTE, RELAX. DON'T FEMALE STING RAYS MATE WITH MULTIPLE MALES AND IN THE 1407 00:52:26,237 --> 00:52:26,768 DON'T FEMALE STING RAYS MATE WITH MULTIPLE MALES AND IN THE SPRING -- 1408 00:52:26,770 --> 00:52:29,771 WITH MULTIPLE MALES AND IN THE SPRING -- >> OKAY, NAT GEO, THAT IS NOT 1409 00:52:29,773 --> 00:52:30,706 SPRING -- >> OKAY, NAT GEO, THAT IS NOT YOUR BUSINESS. 1410 00:52:30,708 --> 00:52:31,773 >> OKAY, NAT GEO, THAT IS NOT YOUR BUSINESS. MULTIPLE MALES. 1411 00:52:31,775 --> 00:52:33,976 YOUR BUSINESS. MULTIPLE MALES. YOU NOT ABOUT TO HAVE ME ON TV 1412 00:52:33,978 --> 00:52:35,177 MULTIPLE MALES. YOU NOT ABOUT TO HAVE ME ON TV LOOKING LIKE A HO. 1413 00:52:35,179 --> 00:52:38,780 YOU NOT ABOUT TO HAVE ME ON TV LOOKING LIKE A HO. YOU TALKING REAL CRAZY SITTING 1414 00:52:38,782 --> 00:52:42,517 LOOKING LIKE A HO. YOU TALKING REAL CRAZY SITTING NEXT TO A STING RAY YOU KNOCKED 1415 00:52:42,519 --> 00:52:42,784 YOU TALKING REAL CRAZY SITTING NEXT TO A STING RAY YOU KNOCKED UP. 1416 00:52:42,786 --> 00:52:45,988 NEXT TO A STING RAY YOU KNOCKED UP. YOU LUCKY I'M KEEPING IT. 1417 00:52:45,990 --> 00:52:47,856 UP. YOU LUCKY I'M KEEPING IT. I WAS LIKE, DAMN, GUESS I'M 1418 00:52:47,858 --> 00:52:51,026 YOU LUCKY I'M KEEPING IT. I WAS LIKE, DAMN, GUESS I'M HAVING A LITTLE CHE RAY. 1419 00:52:51,028 --> 00:52:53,328 I WAS LIKE, DAMN, GUESS I'M HAVING A LITTLE CHE RAY. >> WELL, YOU'RE NOT JUST 1420 00:52:53,330 --> 00:52:54,129 HAVING A LITTLE CHE RAY. >> WELL, YOU'RE NOT JUST PREGNANT WITH ONE. 1421 00:52:54,131 --> 00:52:56,732 >> WELL, YOU'RE NOT JUST PREGNANT WITH ONE. I HEARD YOU'RE HAVING 1422 00:52:56,734 --> 00:52:57,165 PREGNANT WITH ONE. I HEARD YOU'RE HAVING QUADRUPLETS. 1423 00:52:57,167 --> 00:53:01,670 I HEARD YOU'RE HAVING QUADRUPLETS. >> WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH 1424 00:53:01,672 --> 00:53:04,072 QUADRUPLETS. >> WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH FOUR OF YOUR BABIES? 1425 00:53:04,074 --> 00:53:07,109 >> WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH FOUR OF YOUR BABIES? THERE'S NO WAY YOU CAN SUPPORT 1426 00:53:07,111 --> 00:53:07,876 FOUR OF YOUR BABIES? THERE'S NO WAY YOU CAN SUPPORT FOUR BABIES. 1427 00:53:07,878 --> 00:53:10,279 THERE'S NO WAY YOU CAN SUPPORT FOUR BABIES. YOU WORK ONE DAY A WEEK. 1428 00:53:10,281 --> 00:53:10,646 FOUR BABIES. YOU WORK ONE DAY A WEEK. QUESTION. 1429 00:53:10,648 --> 00:53:12,514 YOU WORK ONE DAY A WEEK. QUESTION. WHO'S THE BEST ABORTION DOCTOR? 1430 00:53:12,516 --> 00:53:14,583 QUESTION. WHO'S THE BEST ABORTION DOCTOR? I KNOW YOU THE 1431 00:53:38,091 --> 00:53:43,662 >>> OKAY. LET'S SEE WHAT I MADE IN TIPS TODAY. 1432 00:53:43,664 --> 00:53:44,429 LET'S SEE WHAT I MADE IN TIPS TODAY. 40, 41, 42 BUCKS. 1433 00:53:44,431 --> 00:53:45,063 TODAY. 40, 41, 42 BUCKS. NOT BAD. 1434 00:53:45,065 --> 00:53:47,466 40, 41, 42 BUCKS. NOT BAD. >> DAMN, I MADE 39. 1435 00:53:47,468 --> 00:53:48,033 NOT BAD. >> DAMN, I MADE 39. SO CLOSE. 1436 00:53:48,035 --> 00:53:50,635 >> DAMN, I MADE 39. SO CLOSE. >> WELL, LOOKS LIKE I'M THE TIP 1437 00:53:50,637 --> 00:53:51,303 SO CLOSE. >> WELL, LOOKS LIKE I'M THE TIP QUEEN TONIGHT. 1438 00:53:51,305 --> 00:53:52,838 >> WELL, LOOKS LIKE I'M THE TIP QUEEN TONIGHT. HOW ABOUT YOU, NEW GIRL? 1439 00:53:52,840 --> 00:53:53,505 QUEEN TONIGHT. HOW ABOUT YOU, NEW GIRL? >> OH. 1440 00:53:53,507 --> 00:53:54,306 HOW ABOUT YOU, NEW GIRL? >> OH. LET ME SEE. 1441 00:53:54,308 --> 00:53:54,973 >> OH. LET ME SEE. >> YEAH. 1442 00:53:54,975 --> 00:53:57,509 LET ME SEE. >> YEAH. HOW MUCH TIPS DID YOU MAKE? 1443 00:53:57,511 --> 00:54:02,447 >> YEAH. HOW MUCH TIPS DID YOU MAKE? >> 31, 32, $36,000. 1444 00:54:02,449 --> 00:54:03,882 HOW MUCH TIPS DID YOU MAKE? >> 31, 32, $36,000. >> JESUS. 1445 00:54:03,884 --> 00:54:04,516 >> 31, 32, $36,000. >> JESUS. >> WHAT? 1446 00:54:04,518 --> 00:54:05,484 >> JESUS. >> WHAT? >> IS THAT LOW? 1447 00:54:05,486 --> 00:54:08,253 >> WHAT? >> IS THAT LOW? >> I WOULDN'T SAY LOW. 1448 00:54:08,255 --> 00:54:08,854 >> IS THAT LOW? >> I WOULDN'T SAY LOW. >> YEAH. 1449 00:54:08,856 --> 00:54:10,589 >> I WOULDN'T SAY LOW. >> YEAH. THAT'S PRETTY GOOD, TINA. 1450 00:54:10,591 --> 00:54:11,823 >> YEAH. THAT'S PRETTY GOOD, TINA. >> WELL, ANOTHER BAD DAY FOR 1451 00:54:11,825 --> 00:54:14,559 THAT'S PRETTY GOOD, TINA. >> WELL, ANOTHER BAD DAY FOR DENNIS. 1452 00:54:14,561 --> 00:54:17,062 >> WELL, ANOTHER BAD DAY FOR DENNIS. ALL I GOT IN TIPS WAS 12 CENTS 1453 00:54:17,064 --> 00:54:19,264 DENNIS. ALL I GOT IN TIPS WAS 12 CENTS AND THIS NOTE THAT SAID, YOU 1454 00:54:19,266 --> 00:54:20,032 ALL I GOT IN TIPS WAS 12 CENTS AND THIS NOTE THAT SAID, YOU RUINED MY DAY. 1455 00:54:20,034 --> 00:54:22,267 AND THIS NOTE THAT SAID, YOU RUINED MY DAY. >> WELL, THAT'S THE JOB. 1456 00:54:22,269 --> 00:54:24,036 RUINED MY DAY. >> WELL, THAT'S THE JOB. IT'S UP AND IT'S DOWN SOMETIMES. 1457 00:54:24,038 --> 00:54:24,803 >> WELL, THAT'S THE JOB. IT'S UP AND IT'S DOWN SOMETIMES. >> YEAH. 1458 00:54:24,805 --> 00:54:25,837 IT'S UP AND IT'S DOWN SOMETIMES. >> YEAH. TABLE SIX STIFFED ME. 1459 00:54:25,839 --> 00:54:26,671 >> YEAH. TABLE SIX STIFFED ME. >> YEAH. 1460 00:54:26,673 --> 00:54:27,873 TABLE SIX STIFFED ME. >> YEAH. THAT'S GONNA HAPPEN. 1461 00:54:27,875 --> 00:54:29,207 >> YEAH. THAT'S GONNA HAPPEN. >> I'M SO SORRY. 1462 00:54:29,209 --> 00:54:32,878 THAT'S GONNA HAPPEN. >> I'M SO SORRY. I HAD TO RUN TO THE BANK. 1463 00:54:32,880 --> 00:54:34,513 >> I'M SO SORRY. I HAD TO RUN TO THE BANK. HERE'S YOUR TIP, NEW GIRL. 1464 00:54:34,515 --> 00:54:35,113 I HAD TO RUN TO THE BANK. HERE'S YOUR TIP, NEW GIRL. DAMN SHE FINE. 1465 00:54:35,115 --> 00:54:36,548 HERE'S YOUR TIP, NEW GIRL. DAMN SHE FINE. >> THAT IS INSANE. 1466 00:54:36,550 --> 00:54:38,183 DAMN SHE FINE. >> THAT IS INSANE. I SERVED THAT GUY LAST WEEK. 1467 00:54:38,185 --> 00:54:40,685 >> THAT IS INSANE. I SERVED THAT GUY LAST WEEK. WHEN I BROUGHT THE CHECK, HE 1468 00:54:40,687 --> 00:54:42,554 I SERVED THAT GUY LAST WEEK. WHEN I BROUGHT THE CHECK, HE PATTED HIS POCKETS AND SAID, 1469 00:54:42,556 --> 00:54:43,889 WHEN I BROUGHT THE CHECK, HE PATTED HIS POCKETS AND SAID, SORRY, I JUST GOT LAID OFF. 1470 00:54:43,891 --> 00:54:45,857 PATTED HIS POCKETS AND SAID, SORRY, I JUST GOT LAID OFF. >> WHEN I SERVED HIM, HE SAID 1471 00:54:45,859 --> 00:54:47,826 SORRY, I JUST GOT LAID OFF. >> WHEN I SERVED HIM, HE SAID ARE THERE ANY LADIES WHO WORK 1472 00:54:47,828 --> 00:54:48,226 >> WHEN I SERVED HIM, HE SAID ARE THERE ANY LADIES WHO WORK HERE? 1473 00:54:48,228 --> 00:54:51,063 ARE THERE ANY LADIES WHO WORK HERE? >> OKAY, GUYS, RAZZ THE NEW 1474 00:54:51,065 --> 00:54:51,363 HERE? >> OKAY, GUYS, RAZZ THE NEW GIRL. 1475 00:54:51,365 --> 00:54:53,131 >> OKAY, GUYS, RAZZ THE NEW GIRL. BUT HONESTLY, I THINK IT'S JUST 1476 00:54:53,133 --> 00:54:54,499 GIRL. BUT HONESTLY, I THINK IT'S JUST ABOUT GREAT SERVICE. 1477 00:54:54,501 --> 00:54:54,800 BUT HONESTLY, I THINK IT'S JUST ABOUT GREAT SERVICE. WATCH. 1478 00:54:54,802 --> 00:54:55,634 ABOUT GREAT SERVICE. WATCH. I'M GOING TO GO DEAL WITH TABLE 1479 00:54:55,636 --> 00:55:00,472 WATCH. I'M GOING TO GO DEAL WITH TABLE EIGHT. 1480 00:55:00,474 --> 00:55:01,239 I'M GOING TO GO DEAL WITH TABLE EIGHT. HI, BOYS. 1481 00:55:01,241 --> 00:55:02,908 EIGHT. HI, BOYS. WHO WANTS A REFILL? 1482 00:55:02,910 --> 00:55:05,710 HI, BOYS. WHO WANTS A REFILL? >> US, US, WE DO! 1483 00:55:05,712 --> 00:55:08,647 WHO WANTS A REFILL? >> US, US, WE DO! >> COMING RIGHT UP. 1484 00:55:08,649 --> 00:55:09,581 >> US, US, WE DO! >> COMING RIGHT UP. OH, MY GOSH. 1485 00:55:09,583 --> 00:55:11,416 >> COMING RIGHT UP. OH, MY GOSH. I AM SUCH A KLUTZ. 1486 00:55:11,418 --> 00:55:12,451 OH, MY GOSH. I AM SUCH A KLUTZ. I AM SO SORRY. 1487 00:55:12,453 --> 00:55:12,884 I AM SUCH A KLUTZ. I AM SO SORRY. >> IT'S OKAY. 1488 00:55:12,886 --> 00:55:16,154 I AM SO SORRY. >> IT'S OKAY. ANYTHING YOU DO IS OKAY. 1489 00:55:16,156 --> 00:55:19,157 >> IT'S OKAY. ANYTHING YOU DO IS OKAY. >> OH, IT LOOKS LIKE THERE'S A 1490 00:55:19,159 --> 00:55:20,625 ANYTHING YOU DO IS OKAY. >> OH, IT LOOKS LIKE THERE'S A LITTLE BEER LEFT IN THE PITCHER. 1491 00:55:20,627 --> 00:55:22,127 >> OH, IT LOOKS LIKE THERE'S A LITTLE BEER LEFT IN THE PITCHER. WHO WANTS SOME? 1492 00:55:22,129 --> 00:55:22,394 LITTLE BEER LEFT IN THE PITCHER. WHO WANTS SOME? YOU? 1493 00:55:22,396 --> 00:55:22,994 WHO WANTS SOME? YOU? >> OH, WHAT THE HECK. 1494 00:55:22,996 --> 00:55:23,295 YOU? >> OH, WHAT THE HECK. SURE. 1495 00:55:23,297 --> 00:55:26,398 >> OH, WHAT THE HECK. SURE. >> OKAY. 1496 00:55:26,400 --> 00:55:29,267 SURE. >> OKAY. >> OH, AWESOME. 1497 00:55:29,269 --> 00:55:33,572 >> OKAY. >> OH, AWESOME. THE BEST PART IS I'VE BEEN SOBER 1498 00:55:33,574 --> 00:55:35,040 >> OH, AWESOME. THE BEST PART IS I'VE BEEN SOBER FOR 22 YEARS, AND THAT'S OVER 1499 00:55:35,042 --> 00:55:35,574 THE BEST PART IS I'VE BEEN SOBER FOR 22 YEARS, AND THAT'S OVER NOW. 1500 00:55:35,576 --> 00:55:36,975 FOR 22 YEARS, AND THAT'S OVER NOW. >> HEY, CAN WE BUY YOU A CAR OR 1501 00:55:36,977 --> 00:55:39,444 NOW. >> HEY, CAN WE BUY YOU A CAR OR SOMETHING? 1502 00:55:39,446 --> 00:55:44,950 >> HEY, CAN WE BUY YOU A CAR OR SOMETHING? >> YOU GUYS ARE HILARIOUS. 1503 00:55:44,952 --> 00:55:45,217 SOMETHING? >> YOU GUYS ARE HILARIOUS. SEE. 1504 00:55:45,219 --> 00:55:46,318 >> YOU GUYS ARE HILARIOUS. SEE. WAS THAT SO HARD? 1505 00:55:46,320 --> 00:55:48,353 SEE. WAS THAT SO HARD? >> YOU SPILLED ALL OVER THEM AND 1506 00:55:48,355 --> 00:55:49,554 WAS THAT SO HARD? >> YOU SPILLED ALL OVER THEM AND MADE ONE GUY RELAPSE. 1507 00:55:49,556 --> 00:55:50,122 >> YOU SPILLED ALL OVER THEM AND MADE ONE GUY RELAPSE. >> THEY JUST LIKE YOU. 1508 00:55:50,124 --> 00:55:54,192 MADE ONE GUY RELAPSE. >> THEY JUST LIKE YOU. WATCH. 1509 00:55:54,194 --> 00:55:56,027 >> THEY JUST LIKE YOU. WATCH. HEY, GUYS, I JUST WANTED TO 1510 00:55:56,029 --> 00:55:57,696 WATCH. HEY, GUYS, I JUST WANTED TO OFFER YOU A FREE ROUND. 1511 00:55:57,698 --> 00:55:59,764 HEY, GUYS, I JUST WANTED TO OFFER YOU A FREE ROUND. >> I'M GOING TO STOP YOU RIGHT 1512 00:55:59,766 --> 00:56:00,098 OFFER YOU A FREE ROUND. >> I'M GOING TO STOP YOU RIGHT THERE. 1513 00:56:00,100 --> 00:56:02,534 >> I'M GOING TO STOP YOU RIGHT THERE. I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU. 1514 00:56:02,536 --> 00:56:03,468 THERE. I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU. I DON'T WANT TO KNOW YOU. 1515 00:56:03,470 --> 00:56:06,271 I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU. I DON'T WANT TO KNOW YOU. I WANT OTHER GIRL. 1516 00:56:06,273 --> 00:56:07,372 I DON'T WANT TO KNOW YOU. I WANT OTHER GIRL. >> AND I'LL TAKE THAT. 1517 00:56:07,374 --> 00:56:11,176 I WANT OTHER GIRL. >> AND I'LL TAKE THAT. >> GREAT. 1518 00:56:11,178 --> 00:56:12,644 >> AND I'LL TAKE THAT. >> GREAT. SO, YEAH, IT WAS A LITTLE 1519 00:56:12,646 --> 00:56:13,512 >> GREAT. SO, YEAH, IT WAS A LITTLE DIFFERENT FOR ME. 1520 00:56:13,514 --> 00:56:13,845 SO, YEAH, IT WAS A LITTLE DIFFERENT FOR ME. >> YEAH. 1521 00:56:13,847 --> 00:56:14,179 DIFFERENT FOR ME. >> YEAH. EXACTLY. 1522 00:56:14,181 --> 00:56:17,516 >> YEAH. EXACTLY. WATCH THIS. 1523 00:56:17,518 --> 00:56:18,016 EXACTLY. WATCH THIS. HELLO, MY GUYS. 1524 00:56:18,018 --> 00:56:18,316 WATCH THIS. HELLO, MY GUYS. >> NO! 1525 00:56:18,318 --> 00:56:22,154 HELLO, MY GUYS. >> NO! >> OF COURSE. 1526 00:56:22,156 --> 00:56:22,921 >> NO! >> OF COURSE. >> SEE. 1527 00:56:22,923 --> 00:56:25,657 >> OF COURSE. >> SEE. NO OFFENSE, TINA, BUT YOU'RE 1528 00:56:25,659 --> 00:56:27,159 >> SEE. NO OFFENSE, TINA, BUT YOU'RE MAKING US FEEL BAD AND YOU'RE 1529 00:56:27,161 --> 00:56:30,295 NO OFFENSE, TINA, BUT YOU'RE MAKING US FEEL BAD AND YOU'RE TAKING ALL OUR TIPS. 1530 00:56:30,297 --> 00:56:31,596 MAKING US FEEL BAD AND YOU'RE TAKING ALL OUR TIPS. >> YEAH. 1531 00:56:31,598 --> 00:56:32,297 TAKING ALL OUR TIPS. >> YEAH. 1532 00:56:32,299 --> 00:56:33,331 >> YEAH. MAYBE HOOTERS ISN'T THE RIGHT 1533 00:56:33,333 --> 00:56:33,832 MAYBE HOOTERS ISN'T THE RIGHT PLACE FOR YOU. 1534 00:56:33,834 --> 00:56:34,332 MAYBE HOOTERS ISN'T THE RIGHT PLACE FOR YOU. >> OH. 1535 00:56:34,334 --> 00:56:37,335 PLACE FOR YOU. >> OH. YOU KNOW, I ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT 1536 00:56:37,337 --> 00:56:38,703 >> OH. YOU KNOW, I ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT THIS PLACE WAS THE ONE PLACE I 1537 00:56:38,705 --> 00:56:39,704 YOU KNOW, I ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT THIS PLACE WAS THE ONE PLACE I WOULD FEEL AT HOME. 1538 00:56:39,706 --> 00:56:41,907 THIS PLACE WAS THE ONE PLACE I WOULD FEEL AT HOME. I'VE TRIED TO WORK AT OTHER 1539 00:56:41,909 --> 00:56:42,641 WOULD FEEL AT HOME. I'VE TRIED TO WORK AT OTHER JOBS, AND I CAN'T. 1540 00:56:42,643 --> 00:56:44,943 I'VE TRIED TO WORK AT OTHER JOBS, AND I CAN'T. I WORKED AT AN AIRPORT, NO 1541 00:56:44,945 --> 00:56:45,844 JOBS, AND I CAN'T. I WORKED AT AN AIRPORT, NO PLANES TOOK OFF. 1542 00:56:45,846 --> 00:56:46,611 I WORKED AT AN AIRPORT, NO PLANES TOOK OFF. I WAS A CROSSING GUARD, 1543 00:56:46,613 --> 00:56:49,281 PLANES TOOK OFF. I WAS A CROSSING GUARD, THOUSANDS DIED. 1544 00:56:49,283 --> 00:56:50,849 I WAS A CROSSING GUARD, THOUSANDS DIED. BUT IF YOU DON'T THINK I BELONG 1545 00:56:50,851 --> 00:56:55,187 THOUSANDS DIED. BUT IF YOU DON'T THINK I BELONG AT HOOTERS, I'LL GO. 1546 00:56:55,189 --> 00:56:55,720 BUT IF YOU DON'T THINK I BELONG AT HOOTERS, I'LL GO. >> WAIT! 1547 00:56:55,722 --> 00:56:59,324 AT HOOTERS, I'LL GO. >> WAIT! >> OH, MY GOD, HOOTERS MASCOT 1548 00:56:59,326 --> 00:57:00,192 >> WAIT! >> OH, MY GOD, HOOTERS MASCOT HOOTER THE OWL? 1549 00:57:00,194 --> 00:57:01,092 >> OH, MY GOD, HOOTERS MASCOT HOOTER THE OWL? >> THAT'S ME. 1550 00:57:01,094 --> 00:57:03,495 HOOTER THE OWL? >> THAT'S ME. AND I CAME TO SAY YOU CAN'T 1551 00:57:03,497 --> 00:57:04,162 >> THAT'S ME. AND I CAME TO SAY YOU CAN'T LEAVE. 1552 00:57:04,164 --> 00:57:07,465 AND I CAME TO SAY YOU CAN'T LEAVE. YOU ARE MY HARRY POTTER, AND 1553 00:57:07,467 --> 00:57:10,135 LEAVE. YOU ARE MY HARRY POTTER, AND THIS IS YOUR HOGWARTS. 1554 00:57:10,137 --> 00:57:10,735 YOU ARE MY HARRY POTTER, AND THIS IS YOUR HOGWARTS. SO PLEASE STAY. 1555 00:57:10,737 --> 00:57:14,072 THIS IS YOUR HOGWARTS. SO PLEASE STAY. >> IF YOU REALLY WANT ME TO. 1556 00:57:14,074 --> 00:57:14,372 SO PLEASE STAY. >> IF YOU REALLY WANT ME TO. OKAY. 1557 00:57:14,374 --> 00:57:15,440 >> IF YOU REALLY WANT ME TO. OKAY. >> THANK YOU. 1558 00:57:15,442 --> 00:57:16,741 OKAY. >> THANK YOU. >> AND WHAT ABOUT US? 1559 00:57:16,743 --> 00:57:19,077 >> THANK YOU. >> AND WHAT ABOUT US? >> I DON'T CARE. 1560 00:57:19,079 --> 00:57:20,378 >> AND WHAT ABOUT US? >> I DON'T CARE. NOW, I MUST GO. 1561 00:57:20,380 --> 00:57:22,280 >> I DON'T CARE. NOW, I MUST GO. I HAVE A FUNERAL TO ATTEND. 1562 00:57:22,282 --> 00:57:23,481 NOW, I MUST GO. I HAVE A FUNERAL TO ATTEND. MY FRIEND FLACO FLEW INTO A 1563 00:57:23,483 --> 00:57:25,183 I HAVE A FUNERAL TO ATTEND. MY FRIEND FLACO FLEW INTO A BUILDING. 1564 00:57:25,185 --> 00:57:29,087 MY FRIEND FLACO FLEW INTO A BUILDING. I'M VERY SAD. 1565 00:57:29,089 --> 00:57:31,456 BUILDING. I'M VERY SAD. SO IF SOMEONE COULD SHOW ME 1566 00:57:31,458 --> 00:57:32,424 I'M VERY SAD. SO IF SOMEONE COULD SHOW ME THEIR BREASTS. 1567 00:57:32,426 --> 00:57:33,291 SO IF SOMEONE COULD SHOW ME THEIR BREASTS. >> I'LL DO IT. 1568 00:57:33,293 --> 00:57:34,859 THEIR BREASTS. >> I'LL DO IT. >> I'LL JUST LEAVE. 1569 00:57:34,861 --> 00:57:41,566 >> I'LL DO IT. >> I'LL JUST LEAVE. >> GOOD-BYE, HOOTER THE OWL! 1570 00:58:05,591 --> 00:58:12,364 >>> ONCE AGAIN, KACEY MUSGRAVES! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] ♪♪ 1571 00:58:12,366 --> 00:58:21,506 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] ♪♪ ♪♪ 1572 00:58:21,508 --> 00:58:23,141 ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪ MADE SOME BREAKFAST 1573 00:58:23,143 --> 00:58:25,276 ♪♪ ♪ MADE SOME BREAKFAST MADE SOME LOVE 1574 00:58:25,278 --> 00:58:26,378 ♪ MADE SOME BREAKFAST MADE SOME LOVE THIS IS WHAT DREAMS 1575 00:58:26,380 --> 00:58:28,013 MADE SOME LOVE THIS IS WHAT DREAMS ARE MADE OF ♪ 1576 00:58:28,015 --> 00:58:29,648 THIS IS WHAT DREAMS ARE MADE OF ♪ ♪ ON A CLOUDY 1577 00:58:29,650 --> 00:58:33,418 ARE MADE OF ♪ ♪ ON A CLOUDY MONDAY MORNING ♪ 1578 00:58:33,420 --> 00:58:34,986 ♪ ON A CLOUDY MONDAY MORNING ♪ ♪ SUMMER'S GONE 1579 00:58:34,988 --> 00:58:36,621 MONDAY MORNING ♪ ♪ SUMMER'S GONE AND YOU'RE STILL HERE 1580 00:58:36,623 --> 00:58:38,223 ♪ SUMMER'S GONE AND YOU'RE STILL HERE FOR BOTH OF US 1581 00:58:38,225 --> 00:58:40,358 AND YOU'RE STILL HERE FOR BOTH OF US IT'S BEEN A YEAR ♪ 1582 00:58:40,360 --> 00:58:40,925 FOR BOTH OF US IT'S BEEN A YEAR ♪ ♪ A TIDAL WAVE 1583 00:58:40,927 --> 00:58:45,764 IT'S BEEN A YEAR ♪ ♪ A TIDAL WAVE WITHOUT A WARNING ♪ 1584 00:58:45,766 --> 00:58:47,365 ♪ A TIDAL WAVE WITHOUT A WARNING ♪ ♪ PLEASE DON'T 1585 00:58:47,367 --> 00:58:52,237 WITHOUT A WARNING ♪ ♪ PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME REGRET ♪ 1586 00:58:52,239 --> 00:58:54,372 ♪ PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME REGRET ♪ ♪ OPENIN' UP 1587 00:58:54,374 --> 00:58:58,143 MAKE ME REGRET ♪ ♪ OPENIN' UP THAT PART OF MYSELF 1588 00:58:58,145 --> 00:58:59,210 ♪ OPENIN' UP THAT PART OF MYSELF THAT I'VE BEEN SCARED 1589 00:58:59,212 --> 00:59:01,880 THAT PART OF MYSELF THAT I'VE BEEN SCARED TO GIVE AGAIN ♪ 1590 00:59:01,882 --> 00:59:05,150 THAT I'VE BEEN SCARED TO GIVE AGAIN ♪ ♪ BE GOOD TO ME 1591 00:59:05,152 --> 00:59:08,353 TO GIVE AGAIN ♪ ♪ BE GOOD TO ME AND I'LL BE GOOD TO YOU 1592 00:59:08,355 --> 00:59:12,157 ♪ BE GOOD TO ME AND I'LL BE GOOD TO YOU BUT PLEASE DON'T BE 1593 00:59:12,159 --> 00:59:18,663 AND I'LL BE GOOD TO YOU BUT PLEASE DON'T BE TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE ♪ 1594 00:59:18,665 --> 00:59:20,265 BUT PLEASE DON'T BE TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE ♪ ♪ IN MY MIND 1595 00:59:20,267 --> 00:59:22,967 TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE ♪ ♪ IN MY MIND WE'RE IN NEW YORK 1596 00:59:22,969 --> 00:59:24,569 ♪ IN MY MIND WE'RE IN NEW YORK YOU HAD NEVER BEEN BEFORE ♪ 1597 00:59:24,571 --> 00:59:26,204 WE'RE IN NEW YORK YOU HAD NEVER BEEN BEFORE ♪ ♪ BUT BABY 1598 00:59:26,206 --> 00:59:30,542 YOU HAD NEVER BEEN BEFORE ♪ ♪ BUT BABY NOW IT'S OUR TOWN ♪ 1599 00:59:30,544 --> 00:59:32,677 ♪ BUT BABY NOW IT'S OUR TOWN ♪ ♪ I'LL ADMIT 1600 00:59:32,679 --> 00:59:34,279 NOW IT'S OUR TOWN ♪ ♪ I'LL ADMIT THAT I'M IN DEEP 1601 00:59:34,281 --> 00:59:35,346 ♪ I'LL ADMIT THAT I'M IN DEEP THAT I DON'T KNOW 1602 00:59:35,348 --> 00:59:37,549 THAT I'M IN DEEP THAT I DON'T KNOW HOW ELSE TO BE ♪ 1603 00:59:37,551 --> 00:59:38,116 THAT I DON'T KNOW HOW ELSE TO BE ♪ ♪ AND I DON'T WANNA 1604 00:59:38,118 --> 00:59:42,387 HOW ELSE TO BE ♪ ♪ AND I DON'T WANNA SLOW DOWN ♪ 1605 00:59:42,389 --> 00:59:44,522 ♪ AND I DON'T WANNA SLOW DOWN ♪ ♪ PLEASE DON'T 1606 00:59:44,524 --> 00:59:48,760 SLOW DOWN ♪ ♪ PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME REGRET ♪ 1607 00:59:48,762 --> 00:59:50,929 ♪ PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME REGRET ♪ ♪ OPENIN' UP 1608 00:59:50,931 --> 00:59:54,733 MAKE ME REGRET ♪ ♪ OPENIN' UP THAT PART OF MYSELF 1609 00:59:54,735 --> 00:59:56,334 ♪ OPENIN' UP THAT PART OF MYSELF THAT I'VE BEEN SCARED 1610 00:59:56,336 --> 00:59:59,070 THAT PART OF MYSELF THAT I'VE BEEN SCARED TO GIVE AGAIN ♪ 1611 00:59:59,072 --> 01:00:02,207 THAT I'VE BEEN SCARED TO GIVE AGAIN ♪ ♪ BE GOOD TO ME 1612 01:00:02,209 --> 01:00:05,443 TO GIVE AGAIN ♪ ♪ BE GOOD TO ME AND I'LL BE GOOD TO YOU 1613 01:00:05,445 --> 01:00:08,113 ♪ BE GOOD TO ME AND I'LL BE GOOD TO YOU BUT PLEASE DON'T BE 1614 01:00:08,115 --> 01:00:11,916 AND I'LL BE GOOD TO YOU BUT PLEASE DON'T BE TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE ♪ 1615 01:00:11,918 --> 01:00:17,322 BUT PLEASE DON'T BE TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE ♪ ♪♪ 1616 01:00:17,324 --> 01:00:20,525 TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE ♪ ♪♪ ♪ OH 1617 01:00:20,527 --> 01:00:24,863 ♪♪ ♪ OH MM-MM 1618 01:00:24,865 --> 01:00:26,431 ♪ OH MM-MM OH-OH 1619 01:00:26,433 --> 01:00:29,667 MM-MM OH-OH MM-MM ♪ 1620 01:00:29,669 --> 01:00:36,608 OH-OH MM-MM ♪ ♪♪ 1621 01:00:36,610 --> 01:00:38,209 MM-MM ♪ ♪♪ ♪ MADE SOME BREAKFAST 1622 01:00:38,211 --> 01:00:39,878 ♪♪ ♪ MADE SOME BREAKFAST MADE SOME LOVE 1623 01:00:39,880 --> 01:00:41,479 ♪ MADE SOME BREAKFAST MADE SOME LOVE IF THIS IS WHAT DREAMS 1624 01:00:41,481 --> 01:00:45,216 MADE SOME LOVE IF THIS IS WHAT DREAMS ARE MADE OF ♪ 1625 01:00:45,218 --> 01:00:48,686 IF THIS IS WHAT DREAMS ARE MADE OF ♪ ♪ PLEASE DON'T WAKE ME ♪ 1626 01:00:48,688 --> 01:00:52,490 ARE MADE OF ♪ ♪ PLEASE DON'T WAKE ME ♪ [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] 1627 01:01:07,623 --> 01:01:09,924 >>> BLAND. >> GENERIC. >> DOWN RIGHT UNINVITING. 1628 01:01:09,926 --> 01:01:11,426 >> GENERIC. >> DOWN RIGHT UNINVITING. >> IF THESE ARE THE VIBES YOU'RE 1629 01:01:11,428 --> 01:01:13,261 >> DOWN RIGHT UNINVITING. >> IF THESE ARE THE VIBES YOU'RE GOING FOR, THEN WE'RE YOUR 1630 01:01:13,263 --> 01:01:13,595 >> IF THESE ARE THE VIBES YOU'RE GOING FOR, THEN WE'RE YOUR GIRLS. 1631 01:01:13,597 --> 01:01:15,029 GOING FOR, THEN WE'RE YOUR GIRLS. >> BECAUSE WE'RE THE NATION'S 1632 01:01:15,031 --> 01:01:18,800 GIRLS. >> BECAUSE WE'RE THE NATION'S NUMBER ONE INTERIOR DESIGNERS 1633 01:01:18,802 --> 01:01:20,468 >> BECAUSE WE'RE THE NATION'S NUMBER ONE INTERIOR DESIGNERS FOR -- AIRBNBs. 1634 01:01:20,470 --> 01:01:25,807 NUMBER ONE INTERIOR DESIGNERS FOR -- AIRBNBs. ♪♪ 1635 01:01:25,809 --> 01:01:27,408 FOR -- AIRBNBs. ♪♪ >> I'M CHANEL. 1636 01:01:27,410 --> 01:01:28,510 ♪♪ >> I'M CHANEL. >> AND I'M CHANNEL. 1637 01:01:28,512 --> 01:01:31,379 >> I'M CHANEL. >> AND I'M CHANNEL. >> AND TOGETHER, WE CAN MAKE 1638 01:01:31,381 --> 01:01:33,448 >> AND I'M CHANNEL. >> AND TOGETHER, WE CAN MAKE YOUR RENTALS POP WITH PLAIN 1639 01:01:33,450 --> 01:01:34,449 >> AND TOGETHER, WE CAN MAKE YOUR RENTALS POP WITH PLAIN FURNITURE AND ART FOR NOBODY. 1640 01:01:34,451 --> 01:01:36,251 YOUR RENTALS POP WITH PLAIN FURNITURE AND ART FOR NOBODY. >> ART PIECES LIKE -- 1641 01:01:36,253 --> 01:01:38,052 FURNITURE AND ART FOR NOBODY. >> ART PIECES LIKE -- >> ALBERT EINSTEIN WITH HIS 1642 01:01:38,054 --> 01:01:38,486 >> ART PIECES LIKE -- >> ALBERT EINSTEIN WITH HIS TONGUE OUT. 1643 01:01:38,488 --> 01:01:41,022 >> ALBERT EINSTEIN WITH HIS TONGUE OUT. >> BLACK AND WHITE CHILD HOLDING 1644 01:01:41,024 --> 01:01:41,523 TONGUE OUT. >> BLACK AND WHITE CHILD HOLDING RED BALLOON. 1645 01:01:41,525 --> 01:01:43,925 >> BLACK AND WHITE CHILD HOLDING RED BALLOON. AND OF COURSE, A SINGLE 1646 01:01:43,927 --> 01:01:44,959 RED BALLOON. AND OF COURSE, A SINGLE UNSETTLING PHOTO OF THE FAMILY 1647 01:01:44,961 --> 01:01:49,130 AND OF COURSE, A SINGLE UNSETTLING PHOTO OF THE FAMILY THAT ACTUALLY LIVES HERE. 1648 01:01:49,132 --> 01:01:52,200 UNSETTLING PHOTO OF THE FAMILY THAT ACTUALLY LIVES HERE. WHY STAY IN A HOTEL WHEN FOR 1649 01:01:52,202 --> 01:01:54,102 THAT ACTUALLY LIVES HERE. WHY STAY IN A HOTEL WHEN FOR BASICALLY THE SAME AMOUNT OF 1650 01:01:54,104 --> 01:01:56,437 WHY STAY IN A HOTEL WHEN FOR BASICALLY THE SAME AMOUNT OF MONEY YOU CAN STAY IN A PLACE 1651 01:01:56,439 --> 01:01:59,040 BASICALLY THE SAME AMOUNT OF MONEY YOU CAN STAY IN A PLACE WITH WORSE SHEETS AND A CAMERA 1652 01:01:59,042 --> 01:01:59,507 MONEY YOU CAN STAY IN A PLACE WITH WORSE SHEETS AND A CAMERA IN THE TOILET. 1653 01:01:59,509 --> 01:02:00,074 WITH WORSE SHEETS AND A CAMERA IN THE TOILET. >> HI. 1654 01:02:00,076 --> 01:02:02,277 IN THE TOILET. >> HI. >> BUT OUR DESIGNS AREN'T JUST 1655 01:02:02,279 --> 01:02:03,578 >> HI. >> BUT OUR DESIGNS AREN'T JUST BEAUTIFUL BUT ALSO FUNCTIONAL. 1656 01:02:03,580 --> 01:02:05,146 >> BUT OUR DESIGNS AREN'T JUST BEAUTIFUL BUT ALSO FUNCTIONAL. >> THAT'S WHY WE'LL MAKE SURE 1657 01:02:05,148 --> 01:02:07,982 BEAUTIFUL BUT ALSO FUNCTIONAL. >> THAT'S WHY WE'LL MAKE SURE YOUR LISTING HAS -- AN 1658 01:02:07,984 --> 01:02:12,153 >> THAT'S WHY WE'LL MAKE SURE YOUR LISTING HAS -- AN IMPOSSIBLY COMPLICATED LOCK BOX, 1659 01:02:12,155 --> 01:02:12,720 YOUR LISTING HAS -- AN IMPOSSIBLY COMPLICATED LOCK BOX, 700 K CUPS. 1660 01:02:12,722 --> 01:02:17,091 IMPOSSIBLY COMPLICATED LOCK BOX, 700 K CUPS. >> 12-PAGE PACKET ON HOW TO TAKE 1661 01:02:17,093 --> 01:02:18,326 700 K CUPS. >> 12-PAGE PACKET ON HOW TO TAKE OUT THE GARBAGE. 1662 01:02:18,328 --> 01:02:20,695 >> 12-PAGE PACKET ON HOW TO TAKE OUT THE GARBAGE. >> POLITICALLY AMBIGUOUS ART 1663 01:02:20,697 --> 01:02:22,564 OUT THE GARBAGE. >> POLITICALLY AMBIGUOUS ART WORK, AND OF COURSE A BOAR 1664 01:02:22,566 --> 01:02:26,034 >> POLITICALLY AMBIGUOUS ART WORK, AND OF COURSE A BOAR BODING CLOSE ET LABELED OWNER'S 1665 01:02:26,036 --> 01:02:26,601 WORK, AND OF COURSE A BOAR BODING CLOSE ET LABELED OWNER'S STUFF, DO NOT TOUCH. 1666 01:02:26,603 --> 01:02:27,402 BODING CLOSE ET LABELED OWNER'S STUFF, DO NOT TOUCH. >> STILL NOT SOLD? 1667 01:02:27,404 --> 01:02:28,870 STUFF, DO NOT TOUCH. >> STILL NOT SOLD? JUST LISTEN TO ONE OF OUR 1668 01:02:28,872 --> 01:02:30,538 >> STILL NOT SOLD? JUST LISTEN TO ONE OF OUR SATISFIED CUSTOMERS. 1669 01:02:30,540 --> 01:02:33,141 JUST LISTEN TO ONE OF OUR SATISFIED CUSTOMERS. >> BEFORE CHANEL AND CHANNEL 1670 01:02:33,143 --> 01:02:35,310 SATISFIED CUSTOMERS. >> BEFORE CHANEL AND CHANNEL DECORATED BY AIRBNB, IT WAS A 1671 01:02:35,312 --> 01:02:39,013 >> BEFORE CHANEL AND CHANNEL DECORATED BY AIRBNB, IT WAS A LITTLE DRAB, BUT NOW THERE'S SO 1672 01:02:39,015 --> 01:02:39,581 DECORATED BY AIRBNB, IT WAS A LITTLE DRAB, BUT NOW THERE'S SO WRITING ON THE WALL. 1673 01:02:39,583 --> 01:02:43,518 LITTLE DRAB, BUT NOW THERE'S SO WRITING ON THE WALL. >> YOU MAY KNOW OUR WORK FROM 1674 01:02:43,520 --> 01:02:45,286 WRITING ON THE WALL. >> YOU MAY KNOW OUR WORK FROM COZY CASITA STEPS. 1675 01:02:45,288 --> 01:02:48,890 >> YOU MAY KNOW OUR WORK FROM COZY CASITA STEPS. >> AND THE WONKA IN GLASGOW. 1676 01:02:48,892 --> 01:02:51,259 COZY CASITA STEPS. >> AND THE WONKA IN GLASGOW. STILL DON'T BELIEVE US? 1677 01:02:51,261 --> 01:02:53,194 >> AND THE WONKA IN GLASGOW. STILL DON'T BELIEVE US? JUST LISTEN TO ONE OF OUR 1678 01:02:53,196 --> 01:02:54,095 STILL DON'T BELIEVE US? JUST LISTEN TO ONE OF OUR SATISFIED CUSTOMERS. 1679 01:02:54,097 --> 01:02:54,829 JUST LISTEN TO ONE OF OUR SATISFIED CUSTOMERS. >> WHAT? 1680 01:02:54,831 --> 01:02:55,163 SATISFIED CUSTOMERS. >> WHAT? >> HI. 1681 01:02:55,165 --> 01:02:57,065 >> WHAT? >> HI. >> YOU ALREADY DID ME. 1682 01:02:57,067 --> 01:02:57,398 >> HI. >> YOU ALREADY DID ME. >> OH. 1683 01:02:57,400 --> 01:03:01,369 >> YOU ALREADY DID ME. >> OH. >> SO COME ENJOY OUR CLASSIC 1684 01:03:01,371 --> 01:03:04,772 >> OH. >> SO COME ENJOY OUR CLASSIC DESIGNS WITH THE UTMOST PRIVACY. 1685 01:03:04,774 --> 01:03:05,073 >> SO COME ENJOY OUR CLASSIC DESIGNS WITH THE UTMOST PRIVACY. BYE. 1686 01:03:05,075 --> 01:03:11,446 DESIGNS WITH THE UTMOST PRIVACY. BYE. >> CHANEL AND CHANNEL 1687 01:03:21,457 --> 01:03:23,992 >>> OKAY. TABLE FOR TWO RIGHT HERE. >> THANK YOU. 1688 01:03:23,994 --> 01:03:24,592 TABLE FOR TWO RIGHT HERE. >> THANK YOU. >> THANKS. 1689 01:03:24,594 --> 01:03:26,027 >> THANK YOU. >> THANKS. >> ENJOY. 1690 01:03:26,029 --> 01:03:28,196 >> THANKS. >> ENJOY. >> WOW, HONEY, THIS PLACE IS 1691 01:03:28,198 --> 01:03:28,496 >> ENJOY. >> WOW, HONEY, THIS PLACE IS NICE. 1692 01:03:28,498 --> 01:03:29,197 >> WOW, HONEY, THIS PLACE IS NICE. >> YEAH. 1693 01:03:29,199 --> 01:03:31,032 NICE. >> YEAH. I'M GLAD WE'RE DOING THIS. 1694 01:03:31,034 --> 01:03:31,766 >> YEAH. I'M GLAD WE'RE DOING THIS. IT'S BEEN TOO LONG SINCE WE'VE 1695 01:03:31,768 --> 01:03:34,135 I'M GLAD WE'RE DOING THIS. IT'S BEEN TOO LONG SINCE WE'VE HAD A DATE NIGHT. 1696 01:03:34,137 --> 01:03:35,803 IT'S BEEN TOO LONG SINCE WE'VE HAD A DATE NIGHT. >> THAT'S CRAZY! 1697 01:03:35,805 --> 01:03:38,640 HAD A DATE NIGHT. >> THAT'S CRAZY! >> I SWEAR THIS CHICK, TOTAL 1698 01:03:38,642 --> 01:03:40,808 >> THAT'S CRAZY! >> I SWEAR THIS CHICK, TOTAL TEN, POPS OUT A FULL SET OF 1699 01:03:40,810 --> 01:03:41,175 >> I SWEAR THIS CHICK, TOTAL TEN, POPS OUT A FULL SET OF DENTURES. 1700 01:03:41,177 --> 01:03:43,578 TEN, POPS OUT A FULL SET OF DENTURES. >> GNARLY! 1701 01:03:43,580 --> 01:03:45,713 DENTURES. >> GNARLY! DUDE, DUDE. 1702 01:03:45,715 --> 01:03:46,447 >> GNARLY! DUDE, DUDE. >> THESE GUYS ARE SO LOUD. 1703 01:03:46,449 --> 01:03:48,483 DUDE, DUDE. >> THESE GUYS ARE SO LOUD. >> YOU WANT ME TO GO SAY 1704 01:03:48,485 --> 01:03:48,850 >> THESE GUYS ARE SO LOUD. >> YOU WANT ME TO GO SAY SOMETHING? 1705 01:03:48,852 --> 01:03:50,184 >> YOU WANT ME TO GO SAY SOMETHING? >> YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THAT. 1706 01:03:50,186 --> 01:03:52,287 SOMETHING? >> YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THAT. >> DUDES, DID YOU GUYS WATCH THE 1707 01:03:52,289 --> 01:03:56,958 >> YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THAT. >> DUDES, DID YOU GUYS WATCH THE GAME LAST NIGHT? 1708 01:03:56,960 --> 01:03:58,459 >> DUDES, DID YOU GUYS WATCH THE GAME LAST NIGHT? >> YO, LeBRON WENT OFF! 1709 01:03:58,461 --> 01:03:59,460 GAME LAST NIGHT? >> YO, LeBRON WENT OFF! >> LeBRON JAMES! 1710 01:03:59,462 --> 01:04:01,796 >> YO, LeBRON WENT OFF! >> LeBRON JAMES! >> THAT'S IT. 1711 01:04:01,798 --> 01:04:02,697 >> LeBRON JAMES! >> THAT'S IT. I'M GOING TO GO SAY SOMETHING. 1712 01:04:02,699 --> 01:04:03,598 >> THAT'S IT. I'M GOING TO GO SAY SOMETHING. IT'S OUR DATE NIGHT. 1713 01:04:03,600 --> 01:04:05,133 I'M GOING TO GO SAY SOMETHING. IT'S OUR DATE NIGHT. I'M GOING TO TELL THEM TO JUST 1714 01:04:05,135 --> 01:04:06,934 IT'S OUR DATE NIGHT. I'M GOING TO TELL THEM TO JUST KEEP IT DOWN. 1715 01:04:06,936 --> 01:04:10,038 I'M GOING TO TELL THEM TO JUST KEEP IT DOWN. HEY! 1716 01:04:10,040 --> 01:04:11,272 KEEP IT DOWN. HEY! >> CAN WE HELP YOU? 1717 01:04:11,274 --> 01:04:11,773 HEY! >> CAN WE HELP YOU? >> YEAH. 1718 01:04:11,775 --> 01:04:16,344 >> CAN WE HELP YOU? >> YEAH. I JUST WANTED TO SAY YOU GUYS 1719 01:04:16,346 --> 01:04:17,945 >> YEAH. I JUST WANTED TO SAY YOU GUYS SEEM LIKE REALLY CLOSE FRIENDS. 1720 01:04:17,947 --> 01:04:19,947 I JUST WANTED TO SAY YOU GUYS SEEM LIKE REALLY CLOSE FRIENDS. THAT'S SPECIAL. 1721 01:04:19,949 --> 01:04:24,585 SEEM LIKE REALLY CLOSE FRIENDS. THAT'S SPECIAL. HOPE YOU GUYS TREASURE THAT. 1722 01:04:24,587 --> 01:04:27,121 THAT'S SPECIAL. HOPE YOU GUYS TREASURE THAT. WISH I HAD A GROUP OF GUYS LIKE 1723 01:04:27,123 --> 01:04:27,422 HOPE YOU GUYS TREASURE THAT. WISH I HAD A GROUP OF GUYS LIKE THIS. 1724 01:04:27,424 --> 01:04:30,958 WISH I HAD A GROUP OF GUYS LIKE THIS. YOU MUST REALLY LOVE EACH OTHER. 1725 01:04:30,960 --> 01:04:33,995 THIS. YOU MUST REALLY LOVE EACH OTHER. >> YEAH, I GUESS I LOVE THEM. 1726 01:04:33,997 --> 01:04:35,530 YOU MUST REALLY LOVE EACH OTHER. >> YEAH, I GUESS I LOVE THEM. >> DON'T SAY IT TO ME. 1727 01:04:35,532 --> 01:04:36,631 >> YEAH, I GUESS I LOVE THEM. >> DON'T SAY IT TO ME. SAY IT TO THEM. 1728 01:04:36,633 --> 01:04:38,333 >> DON'T SAY IT TO ME. SAY IT TO THEM. >> OH. 1729 01:04:38,335 --> 01:04:41,102 SAY IT TO THEM. >> OH. YEAH, I LOVE YOU GUYS. 1730 01:04:41,104 --> 01:04:41,469 >> OH. YEAH, I LOVE YOU GUYS. >> COOL. 1731 01:04:41,471 --> 01:04:42,103 YEAH, I LOVE YOU GUYS. >> COOL. >> THANKS, MAN. 1732 01:04:42,105 --> 01:04:42,437 >> COOL. >> THANKS, MAN. >> YEAH. 1733 01:04:42,439 --> 01:04:43,237 >> THANKS, MAN. >> YEAH. DEFINITELY. 1734 01:04:43,239 --> 01:04:47,408 >> YEAH. DEFINITELY. >> NICE. 1735 01:04:47,410 --> 01:04:48,176 DEFINITELY. >> NICE. ANYWAY, YOU FELLAS ENJOY 1736 01:04:48,178 --> 01:04:53,681 >> NICE. ANYWAY, YOU FELLAS ENJOY YOURSELVES. 1737 01:04:53,683 --> 01:04:55,483 ANYWAY, YOU FELLAS ENJOY YOURSELVES. WELL, I DON'T THINK WE'LL BE 1738 01:04:55,485 --> 01:04:56,517 YOURSELVES. WELL, I DON'T THINK WE'LL BE HEARING FROM THEM ANYMORE. 1739 01:04:56,519 --> 01:04:57,885 WELL, I DON'T THINK WE'LL BE HEARING FROM THEM ANYMORE. >> BABE, WHAT WAS THAT? 1740 01:04:57,887 --> 01:05:00,254 HEARING FROM THEM ANYMORE. >> BABE, WHAT WAS THAT? I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO TELL 1741 01:05:00,256 --> 01:05:00,788 >> BABE, WHAT WAS THAT? I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO TELL THEM TO BE QUIET. 1742 01:05:00,790 --> 01:05:02,724 I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO TELL THEM TO BE QUIET. >> OH, THEY'LL BE QUIET NOW. 1743 01:05:02,726 --> 01:05:04,392 THEM TO BE QUIET. >> OH, THEY'LL BE QUIET NOW. YOU SEE, NOTHING SHUTS UP A 1744 01:05:04,394 --> 01:05:06,861 >> OH, THEY'LL BE QUIET NOW. YOU SEE, NOTHING SHUTS UP A GROUP OF GUYS LIKE AN EARNEST 1745 01:05:06,863 --> 01:05:08,763 YOU SEE, NOTHING SHUTS UP A GROUP OF GUYS LIKE AN EARNEST EXPRESSION OF HOW MUCH THEY MEAN 1746 01:05:08,765 --> 01:05:09,230 GROUP OF GUYS LIKE AN EARNEST EXPRESSION OF HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO EACH OTHER. 1747 01:05:09,232 --> 01:05:10,031 EXPRESSION OF HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO EACH OTHER. >> SERIOUSLY? 1748 01:05:10,033 --> 01:05:11,132 TO EACH OTHER. >> SERIOUSLY? THAT WORKS? 1749 01:05:11,134 --> 01:05:13,101 >> SERIOUSLY? THAT WORKS? >> SEE FOR YOURSELF. 1750 01:05:13,103 --> 01:05:16,037 THAT WORKS? >> SEE FOR YOURSELF. >> HOW'S YOUR STEAK? 1751 01:05:16,039 --> 01:05:17,171 >> SEE FOR YOURSELF. >> HOW'S YOUR STEAK? >> LOOKS GOOD. 1752 01:05:17,173 --> 01:05:20,274 >> HOW'S YOUR STEAK? >> LOOKS GOOD. >> COOL. 1753 01:05:20,276 --> 01:05:21,175 >> LOOKS GOOD. >> COOL. >> THAT'S CRAZY. 1754 01:05:21,177 --> 01:05:22,610 >> COOL. >> THAT'S CRAZY. >> OH, YEAH. 1755 01:05:22,612 --> 01:05:24,679 >> THAT'S CRAZY. >> OH, YEAH. ONE TIME AT A SLEEPOVER IN 1756 01:05:24,681 --> 01:05:26,314 >> OH, YEAH. ONE TIME AT A SLEEPOVER IN MIDDLE SCHOOL, I TOLD MY FRIENDS 1757 01:05:26,316 --> 01:05:27,982 ONE TIME AT A SLEEPOVER IN MIDDLE SCHOOL, I TOLD MY FRIENDS THAT LAUGHING WITH THEM WAS THE 1758 01:05:27,984 --> 01:05:29,150 MIDDLE SCHOOL, I TOLD MY FRIENDS THAT LAUGHING WITH THEM WAS THE HIGHLIGHT OF MY DAY. 1759 01:05:29,152 --> 01:05:31,419 THAT LAUGHING WITH THEM WAS THE HIGHLIGHT OF MY DAY. HAVEN'T SPOKEN TO THEM SINCE. 1760 01:05:31,421 --> 01:05:33,020 HIGHLIGHT OF MY DAY. HAVEN'T SPOKEN TO THEM SINCE. ANYWAY, NOW THAT WE HAVE SOME 1761 01:05:33,022 --> 01:05:34,288 HAVEN'T SPOKEN TO THEM SINCE. ANYWAY, NOW THAT WE HAVE SOME QUIET, TELL ME ABOUT YOUR DAY. 1762 01:05:34,290 --> 01:05:36,657 ANYWAY, NOW THAT WE HAVE SOME QUIET, TELL ME ABOUT YOUR DAY. >> OKAY. 1763 01:05:36,659 --> 01:05:37,258 QUIET, TELL ME ABOUT YOUR DAY. >> OKAY. WELL, TODAY AT WORK -- 1764 01:05:37,260 --> 01:05:40,962 >> OKAY. WELL, TODAY AT WORK -- >> AND THAT'S WHEN I SAID TO 1765 01:05:40,964 --> 01:05:46,968 WELL, TODAY AT WORK -- >> AND THAT'S WHEN I SAID TO HIM, I DON'T CHASE, I ATTRACT! 1766 01:05:46,970 --> 01:05:48,703 >> AND THAT'S WHEN I SAID TO HIM, I DON'T CHASE, I ATTRACT! >> ANOTHER NOISY GROUP. 1767 01:05:48,705 --> 01:05:49,237 HIM, I DON'T CHASE, I ATTRACT! >> ANOTHER NOISY GROUP. IT'S FINE. 1768 01:05:49,239 --> 01:05:51,072 >> ANOTHER NOISY GROUP. IT'S FINE. I GOT THIS. 1769 01:05:51,074 --> 01:05:51,472 IT'S FINE. I GOT THIS. EXCUSE ME. 1770 01:05:51,474 --> 01:05:51,939 I GOT THIS. EXCUSE ME. >> SORRY. 1771 01:05:51,941 --> 01:05:52,940 EXCUSE ME. >> SORRY. IS THERE A PROBLEM? 1772 01:05:52,942 --> 01:05:53,441 >> SORRY. IS THERE A PROBLEM? >> YEAH. 1773 01:05:53,443 --> 01:05:56,811 IS THERE A PROBLEM? >> YEAH. I JUST WANTED TO SAY DO YOU EVER 1774 01:05:56,813 --> 01:05:58,146 >> YEAH. I JUST WANTED TO SAY DO YOU EVER THINK ABOUT HOW YOUR MOM IS JUST 1775 01:05:58,148 --> 01:06:01,082 I JUST WANTED TO SAY DO YOU EVER THINK ABOUT HOW YOUR MOM IS JUST A GIRL TOO? 1776 01:06:01,084 --> 01:06:02,517 THINK ABOUT HOW YOUR MOM IS JUST A GIRL TOO? JUST A GIRL LIVING LIFE FOR THE 1777 01:06:02,519 --> 01:06:05,753 A GIRL TOO? JUST A GIRL LIVING LIFE FOR THE FIRST TIME JUST LIKE YOU. 1778 01:06:05,755 --> 01:06:08,756 JUST A GIRL LIVING LIFE FOR THE FIRST TIME JUST LIKE YOU. YOU KNOW, THIS IS STUPID, BUT I 1779 01:06:08,758 --> 01:06:10,825 FIRST TIME JUST LIKE YOU. YOU KNOW, THIS IS STUPID, BUT I ACTUALLY HAVE THIS PHOTO OF MY 1780 01:06:10,827 --> 01:06:13,261 YOU KNOW, THIS IS STUPID, BUT I ACTUALLY HAVE THIS PHOTO OF MY MOM PAINTING MY NURSERY WHILE 1781 01:06:13,263 --> 01:06:16,164 ACTUALLY HAVE THIS PHOTO OF MY MOM PAINTING MY NURSERY WHILE SHE WAS PREGNANT WITH ME IF 1782 01:06:16,166 --> 01:06:18,433 MOM PAINTING MY NURSERY WHILE SHE WAS PREGNANT WITH ME IF Y'ALL WANT TO LOOK AT IT AND 1783 01:06:18,435 --> 01:06:20,201 SHE WAS PREGNANT WITH ME IF Y'ALL WANT TO LOOK AT IT AND THINK ABOUT YOUR MOMS, YOU CAN 1784 01:06:20,203 --> 01:06:20,501 Y'ALL WANT TO LOOK AT IT AND THINK ABOUT YOUR MOMS, YOU CAN TOO. 1785 01:06:20,503 --> 01:06:21,869 THINK ABOUT YOUR MOMS, YOU CAN TOO. >> SHE CALLED ME YESTERDAY, AND 1786 01:06:21,871 --> 01:06:23,371 TOO. >> SHE CALLED ME YESTERDAY, AND I LET IT GO TO VOICE MAIL. 1787 01:06:23,373 --> 01:06:25,840 >> SHE CALLED ME YESTERDAY, AND I LET IT GO TO VOICE MAIL. >> WHEN I WAS 15, I TOOK HER CAR 1788 01:06:25,842 --> 01:06:28,576 I LET IT GO TO VOICE MAIL. >> WHEN I WAS 15, I TOOK HER CAR AND SMOKED A FULL PACK OF 1789 01:06:28,578 --> 01:06:31,779 >> WHEN I WAS 15, I TOOK HER CAR AND SMOKED A FULL PACK OF CIGARETTES IN IT AND THEN BARFED 1790 01:06:31,781 --> 01:06:32,914 AND SMOKED A FULL PACK OF CIGARETTES IN IT AND THEN BARFED IN THE FRONT SEAT. 1791 01:06:32,916 --> 01:06:34,048 CIGARETTES IN IT AND THEN BARFED IN THE FRONT SEAT. THE SMELL NEVER LEFT. 1792 01:06:34,050 --> 01:06:36,217 IN THE FRONT SEAT. THE SMELL NEVER LEFT. >> ONE TIME, I THREW A SUITCASE 1793 01:06:36,219 --> 01:06:38,386 THE SMELL NEVER LEFT. >> ONE TIME, I THREW A SUITCASE AT MY MOM BECAUSE SHE WOULDN'T 1794 01:06:38,388 --> 01:06:39,821 >> ONE TIME, I THREW A SUITCASE AT MY MOM BECAUSE SHE WOULDN'T LET ME SHAVE MY HEAD. 1795 01:06:39,823 --> 01:06:42,123 AT MY MOM BECAUSE SHE WOULDN'T LET ME SHAVE MY HEAD. I REALLY REGRET THAT. 1796 01:06:42,125 --> 01:06:43,191 LET ME SHAVE MY HEAD. I REALLY REGRET THAT. >> YEAH. 1797 01:06:43,193 --> 01:06:46,093 I REALLY REGRET THAT. >> YEAH. ANYWAY, I'M SORRY TO BOTHER YOU. 1798 01:06:46,095 --> 01:06:51,299 >> YEAH. ANYWAY, I'M SORRY TO BOTHER YOU. ENJOY YOUR MEAL. 1799 01:06:51,301 --> 01:06:52,800 ANYWAY, I'M SORRY TO BOTHER YOU. ENJOY YOUR MEAL. WELL, THAT OUGHT TO TAKE CARE OF 1800 01:06:52,802 --> 01:06:53,100 ENJOY YOUR MEAL. WELL, THAT OUGHT TO TAKE CARE OF THAT. 1801 01:06:53,102 --> 01:06:54,035 WELL, THAT OUGHT TO TAKE CARE OF THAT. >> WOW. 1802 01:06:54,037 --> 01:06:55,136 THAT. >> WOW. THAT SURE WAS SOMETHING. 1803 01:06:55,138 --> 01:06:55,536 >> WOW. THAT SURE WAS SOMETHING. >> YEP. 1804 01:06:55,538 --> 01:06:57,605 THAT SURE WAS SOMETHING. >> YEP. NOTHING QUIETS UP A GROUP OF 1805 01:06:57,607 --> 01:07:00,141 >> YEP. NOTHING QUIETS UP A GROUP OF WOMEN QUITE LIKE A REMINDER OF 1806 01:07:00,143 --> 01:07:01,843 NOTHING QUIETS UP A GROUP OF WOMEN QUITE LIKE A REMINDER OF THEIR MOTHER'S HUMANITY. 1807 01:07:01,845 --> 01:07:04,712 WOMEN QUITE LIKE A REMINDER OF THEIR MOTHER'S HUMANITY. >> NICE JOB, HONEY. 1808 01:07:04,714 --> 01:07:06,481 THEIR MOTHER'S HUMANITY. >> NICE JOB, HONEY. NOW WE CAN GET BACK TO DATE 1809 01:07:06,483 --> 01:07:06,781 >> NICE JOB, HONEY. NOW WE CAN GET BACK TO DATE NIGHT. 1810 01:07:06,783 --> 01:07:08,950 NOW WE CAN GET BACK TO DATE NIGHT. YOU SAID SOMETHING HAPPENED AT 1811 01:07:08,952 --> 01:07:09,417 NIGHT. YOU SAID SOMETHING HAPPENED AT WORK TODAY? 1812 01:07:09,419 --> 01:07:10,117 YOU SAID SOMETHING HAPPENED AT WORK TODAY? >> YEAH. 1813 01:07:10,119 --> 01:07:12,019 WORK TODAY? >> YEAH. I CHEATED ON YOU WITH MY BOSS, 1814 01:07:12,021 --> 01:07:13,754 >> YEAH. I CHEATED ON YOU WITH MY BOSS, AND I THINK WE SHOULD BREAK UP. 1815 01:07:13,756 --> 01:07:16,157 I CHEATED ON YOU WITH MY BOSS, AND I THINK WE SHOULD BREAK UP. >> HEY, BABY CAKES, WANT TO GET 1816 01:07:16,159 --> 01:07:16,924 AND I THINK WE SHOULD BREAK UP. >> HEY, BABY CAKES, WANT TO GET OUT OF HERE? 1817 01:07:16,926 --> 01:07:17,258 >> HEY, BABY CAKES, WANT TO GET OUT OF HERE? >> YEAH. 1818 01:07:17,260 --> 01:07:19,160 OUT OF HERE? >> YEAH. SORRY. 1819 01:07:19,162 --> 01:07:23,931 >> YEAH. SORRY. >> AW, MAN. 1820 01:07:23,933 --> 01:07:26,534 SORRY. >> AW, MAN. >> HEY, MAN, ARE YOU OKAY? 1821 01:07:26,536 --> 01:07:29,604 >> AW, MAN. >> HEY, MAN, ARE YOU OKAY? >> I'LL BE ALL RIGHT. 1822 01:07:29,606 --> 01:07:32,273 >> HEY, MAN, ARE YOU OKAY? >> I'LL BE ALL RIGHT. THANKS FOR CHECKING IN ON ME, 1823 01:07:32,275 --> 01:07:32,573 >> I'LL BE ALL RIGHT. THANKS FOR CHECKING IN ON ME, GUYS. 1824 01:07:32,575 --> 01:07:34,141 THANKS FOR CHECKING IN ON ME, GUYS. IT REALLY MEANS A LOT THAT YOU 1825 01:07:34,143 --> 01:07:36,010 GUYS. IT REALLY MEANS A LOT THAT YOU CARE SO MUCH ABOUT ME. 1826 01:07:36,012 --> 01:07:37,278 IT REALLY MEANS A LOT THAT YOU CARE SO MUCH ABOUT ME. OH, THEY'RE GONE. 1827 01:07:37,280 --> 01:07:42,083 CARE SO MUCH ABOUT ME. OH, THEY'RE GONE. GOD, I GOT TO STOP DOING THAT. 1828 01:07:55,898 --> 01:08:00,801 >>> THANK YOU, EVERYONE FOR TONIGHT. THIS HAS BEEN SUCH AN AMAZING 1829 01:08:00,803 --> 01:08:01,102 TONIGHT. THIS HAS BEEN SUCH AN AMAZING WEEK. 1830 01:08:01,104 --> 01:08:02,670 THIS HAS BEEN SUCH AN AMAZING WEEK. THANK YOU LORNE, THANK YOU TO 1831 01:08:02,672 --> 01:08:04,305 WEEK. THANK YOU LORNE, THANK YOU TO THE AMAZING CAST. 1832 01:08:04,307 --> 01:08:07,074 THANK YOU LORNE, THANK YOU TO THE AMAZING CAST. THANK YOU, KACEY AND GLENN. 1833 01:08:07,076 --> 01:08:09,644 THE AMAZING CAST. THANK YOU, KACEY AND GLENN. THIS HAS BEEN SO WONDERFUL. 1834 01:08:09,646 --> 01:08:10,278 THANK YOU, KACEY AND GLENN. THIS HAS BEEN SO WONDERFUL. AH, SUCH A GREAT TIME! 1835 01:08:10,280 --> 01:08:17,585 THIS HAS BEEN SO WONDERFUL. AH, SUCH A GREAT TIME! THANK YOU! 198827