Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:10,000
[MUSIC]
2
00:00:10,001 --> 00:00:20,000
[MUSIC]
3
00:00:20,001 --> 00:00:30,000
[MUSIC].
4
00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:55,000
[MUSIC]
5
00:00:55,001 --> 00:01:09,000
>> This is speed limit
in this statement, Tinex.
6
00:01:09,001 --> 00:01:10,000
45 miles an hour.
7
00:01:10,001 --> 00:01:12,000
>> How fast is that going, Ozzy?
8
00:01:12,001 --> 00:01:13,000
>> I'd say around 90.
9
00:01:13,001 --> 00:01:15,000
>> Suppose you get down off
your motorcycle, give me a ticket.
10
00:01:15,001 --> 00:01:17,000
>> Suppose I let you off
for the warning this time.
11
00:01:17,001 --> 00:01:18,000
>> Suppose it doesn't take.
12
00:01:18,001 --> 00:01:20,000
>> Suppose I have to
whack you over the knuckles.
13
00:01:20,001 --> 00:01:23,000
>> Suppose you're better
over the back of the chair now.
14
00:01:23,001 --> 00:01:24,000
>> You too.
15
00:01:24,001 --> 00:01:27,000
>> I guess I usually am.
16
00:01:27,001 --> 00:01:29,000
>> Same chair, same perfume, same anklet.
17
00:01:29,001 --> 00:01:32,000
>> Same bad wig, same boneyard.
18
00:01:32,001 --> 00:01:34,000
>> I wonder if you want.
19
00:01:34,001 --> 00:01:35,000
>> Shh.
20
00:01:35,001 --> 00:01:36,000
Shh.
21
00:01:36,001 --> 00:01:39,000
Look, pal, we're just trying
to watch the movie, okay?
22
00:01:39,001 --> 00:01:41,000
>> Just ignore him fine.
23
00:01:41,001 --> 00:01:42,000
>> Excuse me?
24
00:01:42,001 --> 00:01:43,000
Excuse me?
25
00:01:43,001 --> 00:01:45,000
Sorry, Martin.
26
00:01:45,001 --> 00:01:46,000
Martin.
27
00:01:46,001 --> 00:01:48,000
Martin.
28
00:01:48,001 --> 00:01:51,000
Fuck you, Martin.
29
00:01:51,001 --> 00:01:53,000
>> All right, asshole.
30
00:01:53,001 --> 00:01:55,000
Oh, my God.
31
00:01:55,001 --> 00:01:58,000
It's Elliot's turn.
32
00:01:58,001 --> 00:02:01,000
It's Elliot Stern's, the Elliot Stern's.
33
00:02:01,001 --> 00:02:02,000
>> Who?
34
00:02:02,001 --> 00:02:04,000
>> One of the greatest
natural wonders in America.
35
00:02:04,001 --> 00:02:06,000
One of the mightiest
spectacles in the world.
36
00:02:06,001 --> 00:02:07,000
>> A shallow land, the crematorium.
37
00:02:07,001 --> 00:02:09,000
He's one of the greatest living novelists.
38
00:02:09,001 --> 00:02:11,000
>> He's one of the
greatest living assholes.
39
00:02:11,001 --> 00:02:12,000
>> Come on, guys.
40
00:02:12,001 --> 00:02:13,000
I'll be right back.
41
00:02:13,001 --> 00:02:14,000
>> You're the jam and you know it.
42
00:02:14,001 --> 00:02:16,000
As you, all they want is my money.
43
00:02:16,001 --> 00:02:17,000
See you.
44
00:02:17,001 --> 00:02:19,000
>> I've always loved your work.
45
00:02:19,001 --> 00:02:20,000
>> Shh.
46
00:02:20,001 --> 00:02:22,000
>> I wonder if I know anything.
47
00:02:22,001 --> 00:02:23,000
>> What?
48
00:02:23,001 --> 00:02:24,000
>> That tears it.
49
00:02:24,001 --> 00:02:27,000
>> It wasn't so much prison, my mind.
50
00:02:27,001 --> 00:02:30,000
It was not getting laid
for two and a half years.
51
00:02:30,001 --> 00:02:33,000
>> Martin, I've got an
early morning tomorrow.
52
00:02:33,001 --> 00:02:34,000
I've got to get home.
53
00:02:34,001 --> 00:02:35,000
>> Okay, okay.
54
00:02:35,001 --> 00:02:36,000
I'll call you.
55
00:02:36,001 --> 00:02:37,000
You know?
56
00:02:37,001 --> 00:02:38,000
>> Great.
57
00:02:38,001 --> 00:02:39,000
>> I can't tell you what
a thrill it is to meet you.
58
00:02:39,001 --> 00:02:42,000
I mean, your work has always
been such an inspiration to me.
59
00:02:42,001 --> 00:02:44,000
>> Are you a writer, Martin?
60
00:02:44,001 --> 00:02:45,000
>> Well, sort of.
61
00:02:45,001 --> 00:02:47,000
I mean, it's always been a dream of mine.
62
00:02:47,001 --> 00:02:49,000
Of course, I've never
actually finished anything.
63
00:02:49,001 --> 00:02:51,000
>> You are being exceedingly modest.
64
00:02:51,001 --> 00:02:52,000
>> Yes.
65
00:02:52,001 --> 00:02:54,000
Yes, I'm a writer.
66
00:02:54,001 --> 00:02:56,000
>> I hate writers.
67
00:02:56,001 --> 00:02:59,000
>> Well, I'm really more of an editor.
68
00:02:59,001 --> 00:03:00,000
>> Really?
69
00:03:00,001 --> 00:03:02,000
Which house?
70
00:03:02,001 --> 00:03:03,000
>> Whitestone.
71
00:03:03,001 --> 00:03:04,000
We're a small, up-and-coming boutique.
72
00:03:04,001 --> 00:03:08,000
>> Oh, that's the one who does
those wretched romance novels.
73
00:03:08,001 --> 00:03:09,000
>> That's us.
74
00:03:09,001 --> 00:03:12,000
So, what have you been doing lately?
75
00:03:12,001 --> 00:03:16,000
>> I'm teaching a fiction
seminar at the university.
76
00:03:16,001 --> 00:03:20,000
I've got a few pages of a new
novel I've been working on.
77
00:03:20,001 --> 00:03:22,000
Would you like to see them?
78
00:03:22,001 --> 00:03:25,000
>> Oh, my God.
79
00:03:25,001 --> 00:03:27,000
>> Really?
80
00:03:27,001 --> 00:03:29,000
>> It would be such an honor, you know.
81
00:03:29,001 --> 00:03:31,000
I mean, just to see your pages.
82
00:03:31,001 --> 00:03:33,000
>> You can look at the pages, Martin.
83
00:03:33,001 --> 00:03:37,000
But stop blowing sunshine up my arse.
84
00:03:37,001 --> 00:03:39,000
>> Okay.
85
00:03:39,001 --> 00:03:42,000
[ Music ]
86
00:03:42,001 --> 00:03:45,000
>> Gibby, you are going to love me.
87
00:03:45,001 --> 00:03:46,000
>> I've always loved you, Marty.
88
00:03:46,001 --> 00:03:47,000
I thought you knew that.
89
00:03:47,001 --> 00:03:51,000
>> What would you say if I told
you I could get us the first novel in 12
90
00:03:51,001 --> 00:03:55,000
years by... ...Elliott Stearns?
91
00:03:55,001 --> 00:03:57,000
>> Not interested.
92
00:03:57,001 --> 00:03:58,000
>> What?
93
00:03:58,001 --> 00:03:59,000
>> Not interested.
94
00:03:59,001 --> 00:04:01,000
Oh, sure, he used to be something.
95
00:04:01,001 --> 00:04:04,000
He knew how to write a
hell of a fuck scene he did.
96
00:04:04,001 --> 00:04:05,000
But he's old fish now, Marty.
97
00:04:05,001 --> 00:04:07,000
It's all dried up.
98
00:04:07,001 --> 00:04:08,000
A drunken syphilitic has been.
99
00:04:08,001 --> 00:04:09,000
>> Oh, come on.
100
00:04:09,001 --> 00:04:10,000
Some of us are trying to eat here.
101
00:04:10,001 --> 00:04:12,000
>> He showed me his first chapter, Gibby.
102
00:04:12,001 --> 00:04:14,000
I mean, it was incredible.
103
00:04:14,001 --> 00:04:15,000
>> No.
104
00:04:15,001 --> 00:04:16,000
Sorry.
105
00:04:16,001 --> 00:04:17,000
Too risky.
106
00:04:17,001 --> 00:04:19,000
Everybody knows he's impossible.
107
00:04:19,001 --> 00:04:21,000
Whose office is this?
108
00:04:21,001 --> 00:04:24,000
>> Gibby, when I was 17,
I read "A Shallow Land."
109
00:04:24,001 --> 00:04:26,000
I didn't talk to my parents
for three weeks, you know.
110
00:04:26,001 --> 00:04:28,000
I mean, it totally changed my life.
111
00:04:28,001 --> 00:04:32,000
Now, what is it going to take
for you to let me do this book?
112
00:04:32,001 --> 00:04:36,000
>> You could guarantee his
advance against your salary.
113
00:04:36,001 --> 00:04:37,000
>> Oh.
114
00:04:37,001 --> 00:04:38,000
>> Right.
115
00:04:38,001 --> 00:04:42,000
Oh, thanks for the anecdote
about your formative years.
116
00:04:42,001 --> 00:04:47,000
>> So what?
117
00:04:47,001 --> 00:04:50,000
So somebody put a
whammy on this world dream.
118
00:04:50,001 --> 00:04:52,000
>> I'll do it.
119
00:04:52,001 --> 00:04:55,000
What a gigantic set of
testicles you have, Marty.
120
00:04:55,001 --> 00:04:57,000
You got your book.
121
00:04:58,000 --> 00:05:03,000
[ Music ]
122
00:05:03,001 --> 00:05:06,000
>> Now, this here is your love line.
123
00:05:06,001 --> 00:05:07,000
>> Here?
124
00:05:07,001 --> 00:05:08,000
What's it say?
125
00:05:08,001 --> 00:05:09,000
>> Sorry, I'm late.
126
00:05:09,001 --> 00:05:14,000
>> My goodness, it wraps clear
around to the back of your hand.
127
00:05:14,001 --> 00:05:17,000
You have a lot of love in you.
128
00:05:17,001 --> 00:05:19,000
>> That's true.
129
00:05:19,001 --> 00:05:21,000
Most people don't see that in me.
130
00:05:21,001 --> 00:05:25,000
>> Toby, do you think you could --
>> Hey, we're doing something here.
131
00:05:25,001 --> 00:05:27,000
>> You were saying?
132
00:05:27,001 --> 00:05:28,000
>> This pet will be.
133
00:05:28,001 --> 00:05:31,000
Why don't we continue this at another time?
134
00:05:31,001 --> 00:05:33,000
>> Any time, you sir.
135
00:05:33,001 --> 00:05:39,000
>> Did you ever see eyes so blue?
136
00:05:39,001 --> 00:05:41,000
>> Only in cartoons.
137
00:05:41,001 --> 00:05:43,000
>> Okay.
138
00:05:43,001 --> 00:05:47,000
So, where do we start?
139
00:05:47,001 --> 00:05:49,000
>> Here's a good place to look.
140
00:05:49,001 --> 00:05:50,000
>> No.
141
00:05:50,001 --> 00:05:51,000
No, thank you.
142
00:05:51,001 --> 00:05:54,000
But that's a beautiful flask.
143
00:05:54,001 --> 00:05:55,000
>> Thank you.
144
00:05:55,001 --> 00:05:59,000
It was a gift from Mr. Ernest Hemingway
when I was a few years younger than
145
00:05:59,001 --> 00:06:00,000
you are now.
146
00:06:00,001 --> 00:06:04,000
Just after he bought me my first tour.
147
00:06:04,001 --> 00:06:06,000
>> Hemingway, huh?
148
00:06:06,001 --> 00:06:09,000
Well, maybe just a sip.
149
00:06:09,001 --> 00:06:14,000
>> This may be the biggest
thing that's ever happened.
150
00:06:14,001 --> 00:06:19,000
>> What is that?
151
00:06:19,001 --> 00:06:20,000
>> Absar.
152
00:06:20,001 --> 00:06:21,000
Tasty, isn't it?
153
00:06:21,001 --> 00:06:23,000
But go carefully.
154
00:06:23,001 --> 00:06:26,000
Apparently it causes paralysis.
155
00:06:26,001 --> 00:06:31,000
>> Well, I have to tell you, I
thought your pages were terrific.
156
00:06:31,001 --> 00:06:34,000
You know, I really -- I can't
wait to see where it goes next.
157
00:06:34,001 --> 00:06:36,000
>> Neither can I.
158
00:06:36,001 --> 00:06:46,000
>> There is no cause for laughter
and there is reason to be angry.
159
00:06:46,001 --> 00:06:47,000
>> Oh.
160
00:06:47,001 --> 00:06:50,000
Do you have a direction in mind?
161
00:06:50,001 --> 00:06:52,000
>> To be honest, Martin.
162
00:06:53,000 --> 00:06:57,000
I've been staring at those
pages for the last 12 years.
163
00:06:57,001 --> 00:06:59,000
And I haven't got a clue.
164
00:06:59,001 --> 00:07:02,000
>> Get out there and do something.
165
00:07:02,001 --> 00:07:04,096
>> Well, I may be way
out of line here, but while
166
00:07:04,108 --> 00:07:06,000
I was reading it, you
know, I had a thought.
167
00:07:07,000 --> 00:07:09,000
>> Well, go ahead and be my guest.
168
00:07:09,001 --> 00:07:10,891
>> Well, I just
thought -- and I'm sure
169
00:07:10,903 --> 00:07:13,000
this has occurred to
you already, you know.
170
00:07:13,001 --> 00:07:18,000
But what if Sean and Colin were brothers?
171
00:07:18,001 --> 00:07:20,000
>> Brothers?
172
00:07:20,001 --> 00:07:23,000
>> Oh, I like that.
173
00:07:23,001 --> 00:07:27,000
Oh, that has a kind of
a twist to it, doesn't it?
174
00:07:27,001 --> 00:07:29,000
A sort of resonance.
175
00:07:29,001 --> 00:07:31,000
>> You should be very proud of yourself.
176
00:07:31,001 --> 00:07:33,000
>> Then the fight at the beginning
becomes -- >> Indeed, indeed.
177
00:07:33,001 --> 00:07:35,000
>> And when they get separated?
178
00:07:35,001 --> 00:07:36,000
>> Of course.
179
00:07:36,001 --> 00:07:37,000
>> And the woman? The woman at the funeral?
180
00:07:37,001 --> 00:07:39,000
>> Could be Kathleen.
181
00:07:39,001 --> 00:07:43,000
>> Well -- >> Martin,
this is so exciting.
182
00:07:43,001 --> 00:07:45,000
Damn, I've got an 11 o'clock seminar.
183
00:07:45,001 --> 00:07:49,000
Martin, we've got to get
some of these ideas on paper.
184
00:07:49,001 --> 00:07:50,000
Do me a favor.
185
00:07:50,001 --> 00:07:51,000
Jot it all down.
186
00:07:51,001 --> 00:07:55,000
And anything else that comes
to mind, I can't wait to tear into it.
187
00:07:55,001 --> 00:07:56,000
>> Great.
188
00:07:56,001 --> 00:07:57,000
I'll get them to you as soon as I can.
189
00:07:57,001 --> 00:08:00,000
>> Martin, I haven't been so inspired
since I wrote "To Shallow Land" in my
190
00:08:00,001 --> 00:08:02,000
mother's attic.
191
00:08:02,001 --> 00:08:03,000
>> Wow.
192
00:08:03,001 --> 00:08:04,001
>> Thank you.
193
00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:22,000
[ Music ]
194
00:08:22,001 --> 00:08:28,000
>> It is good to a small type
of piece with good companions.
195
00:08:28,001 --> 00:08:31,000
It is good for all blue beavers.
196
00:08:31,001 --> 00:08:34,000
It is good for all blue beavers.
197
00:08:34,001 --> 00:08:39,000
Him friend to all blue beavers.
198
00:08:39,001 --> 00:08:56,000
[ Music ]
199
00:08:56,001 --> 00:08:58,000
>> Your pages are set.
200
00:08:58,001 --> 00:08:59,000
>> Elliot?
201
00:08:59,001 --> 00:09:02,000
>> You expect me to sleep
after reading this garbage?
202
00:09:02,001 --> 00:09:03,000
>> What are you talking about?
203
00:09:03,001 --> 00:09:05,000
I mean, this is what we discussed, right?
204
00:09:05,001 --> 00:09:08,000
Yesterday, you liked everything I said.
205
00:09:08,001 --> 00:09:09,000
>> Ah.
206
00:09:09,001 --> 00:09:12,000
But then you had to go and write it down.
207
00:09:12,001 --> 00:09:17,000
It's like you get everything
you know from television.
208
00:09:17,001 --> 00:09:20,000
>> I don't know where
you got an idea like that.
209
00:09:20,001 --> 00:09:24,000
>> You've got the poison fingers, Martin.
210
00:09:24,001 --> 00:09:26,000
I can't work for this.
211
00:09:26,001 --> 00:09:29,000
It wasn't totally fleshed out.
212
00:09:29,001 --> 00:09:31,000
>> Well, maybe you
better flesh it out then.
213
00:09:31,001 --> 00:09:32,000
>> I'm sorry.
214
00:09:32,001 --> 00:09:36,000
>> I expect more from my editor, Martin.
215
00:09:36,001 --> 00:09:38,000
Some place you got here.
216
00:09:38,001 --> 00:09:39,000
>> Thank you.
217
00:09:39,001 --> 00:09:40,000
Thank you.
218
00:09:40,001 --> 00:09:45,000
I've, uh, I've had it for years.
219
00:09:45,001 --> 00:09:46,000
>> It's a coffin.
220
00:09:46,001 --> 00:09:48,000
>> Pardon me?
221
00:09:48,001 --> 00:09:50,160
>> Why don't you
put some handles
222
00:09:50,172 --> 00:09:53,000
on it and you can
lower it into the ground.
223
00:09:53,001 --> 00:09:55,000
>> Well, it is rent stabilized.
224
00:09:55,001 --> 00:09:57,000
>> No wonder you never made it as a writer.
225
00:09:57,001 --> 00:09:59,000
No wonder you never finished anything.
226
00:09:59,001 --> 00:10:01,000
>> Why don't you just
take the whole bottle?
227
00:10:01,001 --> 00:10:03,000
>> No, that'll do.
228
00:10:03,001 --> 00:10:07,000
>> Martin, Martin, Martin, what
are we going to do with you?
229
00:10:07,001 --> 00:10:09,000
>> I don't know that we
need to do anything with me.
230
00:10:09,001 --> 00:10:10,000
I think I'm doing just fine.
231
00:10:10,001 --> 00:10:11,000
>> Of course you are.
232
00:10:11,001 --> 00:10:13,000
But I want so much more for you.
233
00:10:13,001 --> 00:10:16,000
I want your life to be full of passion.
234
00:10:16,001 --> 00:10:21,000
I'm talking about grabbing this
whole fucking planet by the balls
235
00:10:21,001 --> 00:10:25,000
and saying, "Fuck you planet, I exist!"
236
00:10:25,001 --> 00:10:28,000
Have you ever done that?
237
00:10:28,001 --> 00:10:30,000
>> Not in so many words, no.
238
00:10:30,001 --> 00:10:31,000
>> Ha ha.
239
00:10:31,001 --> 00:10:35,000
Martin, I'm going to teach you to live.
240
00:10:35,001 --> 00:10:37,877
I'm going to teach
you what it takes to
241
00:10:37,889 --> 00:10:41,000
be a writer, like
Mr. Hemingway taught me.
242
00:10:41,001 --> 00:10:42,000
>> Really?
243
00:10:42,001 --> 00:10:45,000
>> Martin, I'm going to get you
out of here, out of this apartment,
244
00:10:45,001 --> 00:10:48,000
out of this city, out of New York.
245
00:10:48,001 --> 00:11:10,000
[music]
246
00:11:10,001 --> 00:11:11,000
>> Last place.
247
00:11:11,001 --> 00:11:13,000
I should have brought my tattoo.
248
00:11:13,001 --> 00:11:15,000
Why do you have it?
249
00:11:15,001 --> 00:11:20,000
>> I guess I'll get a glass of milk.
250
00:11:20,001 --> 00:11:21,000
>> Why?
251
00:11:21,001 --> 00:11:22,000
That's good.
252
00:11:22,001 --> 00:11:23,000
>> Shall I ride, please?
253
00:11:23,001 --> 00:11:25,000
>> No, you're done.
254
00:11:25,001 --> 00:11:28,000
We'll get the whole bottle.
255
00:11:28,001 --> 00:11:30,000
Put it over there.
256
00:11:30,001 --> 00:11:31,000
What the hell?
257
00:11:31,001 --> 00:11:34,000
I'll take the whole bottle.
258
00:11:34,001 --> 00:11:35,000
>> That'll be 70 bucks.
259
00:11:35,001 --> 00:11:38,000
>> Take credit cards?
260
00:11:38,001 --> 00:11:39,000
Cash will be fine.
261
00:11:39,001 --> 00:11:41,000
>> Goodness of squeeze, baby.
262
00:11:41,001 --> 00:11:43,000
>> Fuck you, Elliot.
263
00:11:43,001 --> 00:11:49,000
>> But if you're interested,
I got a mattress in the back.
264
00:11:49,001 --> 00:11:52,000
>> I'd pass that one up if I were you.
265
00:11:52,001 --> 00:11:53,000
>> I already have a mattress.
266
00:11:53,001 --> 00:11:58,000
>> Thank you.
267
00:11:58,001 --> 00:12:00,000
>> You're not entering
into the spirit of things.
268
00:12:00,001 --> 00:12:06,000
>> Ah, dear, have a drink.
269
00:12:06,001 --> 00:12:07,000
>> No.
270
00:12:07,001 --> 00:12:09,000
All the way down.
271
00:12:09,001 --> 00:12:19,000
>> You can't spatch as
you can, though, at all.
272
00:12:19,001 --> 00:12:22,000
>> What do you say?
273
00:12:22,001 --> 00:12:24,000
Another?
274
00:12:24,001 --> 00:12:27,000
Thank you.
275
00:12:27,001 --> 00:12:45,000
[ Laughter ]
276
00:12:45,001 --> 00:13:00,000
[ Singing ]
277
00:13:00,001 --> 00:13:06,000
>> That was so nice that
you was eating your own cake.
278
00:13:06,001 --> 00:13:08,000
Buy me another drink.
279
00:13:08,001 --> 00:13:10,000
>> She's got another drink.
280
00:13:10,001 --> 00:13:15,000
>> Excuse me.
281
00:13:15,001 --> 00:13:16,000
Excuse me, sir.
282
00:13:16,001 --> 00:13:20,000
I'll have with Tequila.
283
00:13:20,001 --> 00:13:27,000
[ Singing ]
284
00:13:27,001 --> 00:13:28,000
>> All right.
285
00:13:28,001 --> 00:13:29,000
Sorry.
286
00:13:29,001 --> 00:13:31,000
We were just having some fun.
287
00:13:31,001 --> 00:13:33,000
>> Martin, don't be afraid.
288
00:13:33,001 --> 00:13:35,000
This is what life's about.
289
00:13:35,001 --> 00:13:40,000
Drinking and pouring and
sinning in some asshole's face.
290
00:13:40,001 --> 00:13:42,000
There are consequences so much the better.
291
00:13:42,001 --> 00:13:46,000
>> Ellie, Ellie, this
guy could hurt us a lot.
292
00:13:46,001 --> 00:13:47,000
>> I know.
293
00:13:47,001 --> 00:13:49,000
That's why you must get drunk first.
294
00:13:49,001 --> 00:13:51,000
Have a Tequila.
295
00:13:51,001 --> 00:13:53,000
Have a Tequila.
296
00:13:53,001 --> 00:13:55,000
Have a taste.
297
00:13:55,001 --> 00:13:56,000
>> He's from another country, you know?
298
00:13:56,001 --> 00:13:57,000
He doesn't know what he's doing.
299
00:13:57,001 --> 00:14:00,000
He's deranged.
300
00:14:00,001 --> 00:14:10,000
[ Chatter ]
301
00:14:10,001 --> 00:14:12,000
>> There you little fucker.
302
00:14:12,001 --> 00:14:20,000
[ Chatter ]
303
00:14:20,001 --> 00:14:24,000
[ Chatter ]
304
00:14:24,001 --> 00:14:25,000
>> Whoa.
305
00:14:25,001 --> 00:14:29,000
That was living contact
flesh against flesh.
306
00:14:29,001 --> 00:14:31,000
>> I didn't even land a punch.
307
00:14:31,001 --> 00:14:33,000
>> How did it get to your feet
a lot longer than I expected?
308
00:14:33,001 --> 00:14:35,000
>> I did, didn't I?
309
00:14:35,001 --> 00:14:38,000
>> And the evening wasn't a total loss.
310
00:14:38,001 --> 00:14:43,000
During the fracas, I grabbed these.
311
00:14:43,001 --> 00:14:44,000
Oops.
312
00:14:44,001 --> 00:14:45,000
Here.
313
00:14:45,001 --> 00:14:46,000
On we go.
314
00:14:46,001 --> 00:14:51,000
[ Music ]
315
00:14:51,001 --> 00:14:54,000
>> Ah, Martin.
316
00:14:54,001 --> 00:14:58,000
Tonight was something, huh?
317
00:14:58,001 --> 00:14:59,000
It was something.
318
00:14:59,001 --> 00:15:02,000
>> You really impressed me, Martin.
319
00:15:02,001 --> 00:15:04,000
You drank like a writer.
320
00:15:04,001 --> 00:15:06,000
You fought like a writer.
321
00:15:06,001 --> 00:15:08,000
You puked like a writer.
322
00:15:08,001 --> 00:15:13,000
Now it's time for you
to fight like a writer.
323
00:15:13,001 --> 00:15:18,000
[ Music ]
324
00:15:18,001 --> 00:15:21,000
>> I couldn't be sick right now if I tried.
325
00:15:21,001 --> 00:15:37,000
[ Music ]
326
00:15:37,001 --> 00:15:39,000
>> Get away from me, you son of a bitch.
327
00:15:39,001 --> 00:15:40,000
>> Calm down.
328
00:15:40,001 --> 00:15:42,000
>> Who the hell do you think you are?
329
00:15:42,001 --> 00:15:43,000
All right.
330
00:15:43,001 --> 00:15:44,000
Stay right there.
331
00:15:44,001 --> 00:15:45,000
>> Calm down.
332
00:15:45,001 --> 00:15:47,000
>> Don't move.
333
00:15:47,001 --> 00:15:48,000
>> Hey.
334
00:15:48,001 --> 00:15:50,000
>> Stand back, Martin.
335
00:15:50,001 --> 00:15:51,000
>> I got a clear shot at him.
336
00:15:51,001 --> 00:15:52,000
>> Toby, what are you doing?
337
00:15:52,001 --> 00:15:54,000
>> That pervert tried to attack me.
338
00:15:54,001 --> 00:15:56,000
>> I was only saying hello.
339
00:15:56,001 --> 00:15:58,000
>> I'm sure it was just some
sort of misunderstanding.
340
00:15:58,001 --> 00:16:02,000
>> It's hard to misunderstand
the hand up your skirt.
341
00:16:02,001 --> 00:16:03,000
>> Okay, okay.
342
00:16:03,001 --> 00:16:04,000
That's enough.
343
00:16:04,001 --> 00:16:05,000
That's enough.
344
00:16:05,001 --> 00:16:08,000
Now why don't we get to work?
345
00:16:08,001 --> 00:16:09,000
Toby, I'm sorry.
346
00:16:09,001 --> 00:16:10,000
I'm sorry.
347
00:16:10,001 --> 00:16:14,000
Look, if you get a chance, I
think we could use some coffee.
348
00:16:14,001 --> 00:16:17,000
>> I think we could
use a restraining order.
349
00:16:17,001 --> 00:16:22,000
[ Music ]
350
00:16:22,001 --> 00:16:24,000
>> What the hell were you thinking?
351
00:16:24,001 --> 00:16:29,000
>> That if I just got my hand up
her skirt, the rest would be a snap.
352
00:16:29,001 --> 00:16:32,000
>> I think we're going
to have a little trouble.
353
00:16:32,001 --> 00:16:34,000
>> All right.
354
00:16:34,001 --> 00:16:37,000
All right, Elliot, what
have you got for me?
355
00:16:37,001 --> 00:16:43,000
>> Martin, it's not exactly an estate.
356
00:16:43,001 --> 00:16:45,000
>> Elliot, this is no good.
357
00:16:45,001 --> 00:16:46,000
This is no good.
358
00:16:46,001 --> 00:16:48,000
I've been giving you chapter after chapter.
359
00:16:48,001 --> 00:16:49,000
You wanted an outline.
360
00:16:49,001 --> 00:16:50,000
I gave you an outline.
361
00:16:50,001 --> 00:16:51,000
You wanted more detail.
362
00:16:51,001 --> 00:16:52,562
I gave you more detail,
but I've been doing
363
00:16:52,574 --> 00:16:54,000
everything but the
fucking punctuation.
364
00:16:54,001 --> 00:16:55,000
Now come on.
365
00:16:55,001 --> 00:16:56,000
When am I going to see
what you're doing with it?
366
00:16:56,001 --> 00:16:58,000
I've got a lot on the line here, Elliot.
367
00:16:58,001 --> 00:17:01,000
>> Martin, damn it.
368
00:17:01,001 --> 00:17:04,000
It's not exactly easy for me.
369
00:17:04,001 --> 00:17:10,000
I can't know what it's been
like these last 12 years.
370
00:17:10,001 --> 00:17:14,000
It's as if the words had abandoned me.
371
00:17:14,001 --> 00:17:17,000
They're coming now.
372
00:17:17,001 --> 00:17:20,000
>> Coming slowly.
373
00:17:20,001 --> 00:17:23,576
It's so frustrating,
particularly as your
374
00:17:23,588 --> 00:17:27,000
pages have been
coming in so brilliant.
375
00:17:27,001 --> 00:17:29,000
>> What was that last one?
376
00:17:29,001 --> 00:17:31,000
>> Your last few chapters?
377
00:17:31,001 --> 00:17:37,000
Oh, they're so far beyond what
you were doing a month ago.
378
00:17:37,001 --> 00:17:46,000
>> Passion? It's as if you tore into
yourself and spewed your entrails all
379
00:17:46,001 --> 00:17:46,000
over the pages.
380
00:17:46,001 --> 00:17:48,000
>> You like it?
381
00:17:48,001 --> 00:17:49,000
>> It's inspiring.
382
00:17:49,001 --> 00:17:51,000
It's made me want to write again.
383
00:17:51,001 --> 00:17:57,000
I can't tell.
384
00:17:57,001 --> 00:17:59,000
I want you to have this.
385
00:17:59,001 --> 00:18:02,000
>> Hemingway's flask?
386
00:18:02,001 --> 00:18:03,000
Oh, no.
387
00:18:03,001 --> 00:18:04,000
No, no.
388
00:18:04,001 --> 00:18:05,000
I couldn't.
389
00:18:05,001 --> 00:18:14,000
>> Thank you.
390
00:18:14,001 --> 00:18:17,000
>> You keep going, Martin.
391
00:18:17,001 --> 00:18:20,000
I'll catch up to you.
392
00:18:20,001 --> 00:18:40,000
>> Oh, my God.
393
00:18:40,001 --> 00:18:42,000
>> Elliot Stern.
394
00:18:42,001 --> 00:18:45,000
This must be so exciting for you.
395
00:18:45,001 --> 00:18:48,000
Tell me, what's he like?
396
00:18:48,001 --> 00:18:50,000
>> He has a handful.
397
00:18:50,001 --> 00:18:54,000
There are a few bars in
Hoboken I'm not allowed in now.
398
00:18:54,001 --> 00:19:01,000
But overall, I'd say he's pretty --
>> Where's that last chapter, Martin?
399
00:19:01,001 --> 00:19:03,000
I'm tired of waiting for it.
400
00:19:03,001 --> 00:19:06,000
>> What?
401
00:19:06,001 --> 00:19:08,000
I just gave you 20 pages.
402
00:19:08,001 --> 00:19:10,000
>> I want the rest of it.
403
00:19:10,001 --> 00:19:12,000
>> I can't just crank this stuff out.
404
00:19:12,001 --> 00:19:17,000
>> Oh, I see what's been keeping you.
405
00:19:17,001 --> 00:19:21,000
>> I've been doing a little
bit of this and that, have you?
406
00:19:21,001 --> 00:19:23,000
>> Elliot Sterns, this is Judith.
407
00:19:23,001 --> 00:19:25,000
She's my ex-wife.
408
00:19:25,001 --> 00:19:26,000
>> Ex-wife?
409
00:19:26,001 --> 00:19:28,000
Why'd you throw her out?
410
00:19:28,001 --> 00:19:35,000
She's a little bony, but -- I bet she
could wrap those legs round me twice.
411
00:19:35,001 --> 00:19:37,000
>> Elliot!
412
00:19:37,001 --> 00:19:38,000
Knock it off.
413
00:19:38,001 --> 00:19:43,000
>> Ever done it with a Pulitzer
Prize, when, Amy darlin'?
414
00:19:43,001 --> 00:19:46,000
Not good for me, eh?
415
00:19:46,001 --> 00:19:47,000
What are these?
416
00:19:47,001 --> 00:19:49,000
Those are not ready to show you yet.
417
00:19:49,001 --> 00:19:52,000
Those -- >> I sound
great to show my buttocks.
418
00:19:52,001 --> 00:19:53,000
That crap!
419
00:19:53,001 --> 00:19:57,000
This whole book is crap.
420
00:19:57,001 --> 00:19:59,000
>> Jude, Jude, Jude, wait, wait.
421
00:19:59,001 --> 00:20:01,000
I'm sorry about this.
422
00:20:01,001 --> 00:20:03,000
When he drinks, he gets crazy.
423
00:20:03,001 --> 00:20:04,000
He's really not a bad guy, you know?
424
00:20:04,001 --> 00:20:07,000
I mean, he's just kind of a character.
425
00:20:07,001 --> 00:20:14,000
>> Martin, he's pissing on your book.
426
00:20:14,001 --> 00:20:16,000
>> Elliot!
427
00:20:16,001 --> 00:20:17,000
What the fuck are you doing?
428
00:20:17,001 --> 00:20:19,000
>> Just a minor rewrite, son.
429
00:20:19,001 --> 00:20:21,000
>> Out, out, out, get out!
430
00:20:21,001 --> 00:20:23,000
>> I'll see you tomorrow.
431
00:20:23,001 --> 00:20:25,000
>> No, Elliot, no, I don't think so.
432
00:20:25,001 --> 00:20:26,000
This is it, Elliot.
433
00:20:26,001 --> 00:20:27,000
I've had it with your bullshit.
434
00:20:27,001 --> 00:20:30,000
I've laid it on the line for
you time and time again.
435
00:20:30,001 --> 00:20:43,000
And I -- I -- >> Looks
like I'm talking to myself.
436
00:20:43,001 --> 00:20:47,000
I'll get him up.
437
00:20:47,001 --> 00:20:51,000
>> It's very difficult to instill clean
Christian principles in the face of
438
00:20:51,001 --> 00:20:58,000
such poor sanitation.
439
00:20:58,001 --> 00:20:59,415
>> Listen, I told
you this was going to
440
00:20:59,427 --> 00:21:01,000
be a 200-foot -- >>
Toby, I'm off to lunch.
441
00:21:01,001 --> 00:21:03,000
>> Don't forget to chew.
442
00:21:03,001 --> 00:21:04,000
>> Do I look like I'm made of money?
443
00:21:04,001 --> 00:21:06,000
>> You're trash.
444
00:21:06,001 --> 00:21:09,000
>> Why don't you --
>> Oh, no, not here.
445
00:21:09,001 --> 00:21:12,000
>> You've been avoiding him ever
since you told Elliot to cheese off face at
446
00:21:12,001 --> 00:21:12,000
the back of the house.
447
00:21:12,001 --> 00:21:15,000
>> Why don't you just pay
Gibby and take it like a man?
448
00:21:15,001 --> 00:21:18,000
>> Look, I'll be at Tapper's office.
449
00:21:18,001 --> 00:21:22,000
Just get rid of him.
450
00:21:22,001 --> 00:21:23,000
>> Hello, Toby?
451
00:21:23,001 --> 00:21:25,000
>> He's in there.
452
00:21:25,001 --> 00:21:31,000
>> How comfy to have you in my corner.
453
00:21:31,001 --> 00:21:32,000
>> Marty!
454
00:21:32,001 --> 00:21:34,000
>> Gibby, hi.
455
00:21:34,001 --> 00:21:35,000
>> I was just on my way to lunch.
456
00:21:35,001 --> 00:21:39,000
>> In an interesting communication
with Elliot Stans this morning.
457
00:21:39,001 --> 00:21:42,000
>> Be a ways of punishing
little boys who do not tell the truth.
458
00:21:42,001 --> 00:21:44,000
>> I tell truth.
459
00:21:44,001 --> 00:21:46,000
>> Look, he was impossible to work with.
460
00:21:46,001 --> 00:21:47,000
You were right, okay?
461
00:21:47,001 --> 00:21:48,000
You were right.
462
00:21:48,001 --> 00:21:51,000
And I'll pay the money as soon as I can.
463
00:21:51,001 --> 00:21:55,000
>> Marty, as much as I enjoy hearing
phrases like "you were right" and "I'll
464
00:21:55,001 --> 00:21:56,000
pay you the money,"
465
00:21:56,001 --> 00:21:58,000
I haven't got the faintest
idea what you're talking about.
466
00:21:58,001 --> 00:22:04,000
>> Elliot Stans delivered
the book this morning.
467
00:22:04,001 --> 00:22:06,000
>> Amen.
468
00:22:06,001 --> 00:22:07,000
>> Of course he did.
469
00:22:07,001 --> 00:22:10,000
>> And I've got to tell
you, Marty, it's brilliant.
470
00:22:10,001 --> 00:22:11,000
>> This is great, you know?
471
00:22:11,001 --> 00:22:23,000
I just didn't expect -- >> The
little devil hasn't written a word.
472
00:22:23,001 --> 00:22:24,000
>> This is my book.
473
00:22:24,001 --> 00:22:25,000
>> Yes.
474
00:22:25,001 --> 00:22:27,000
Yes, it is, Marty.
475
00:22:27,001 --> 00:22:28,000
Congratulations.
476
00:22:28,001 --> 00:22:29,000
>> No, Gibby, no.
477
00:22:29,001 --> 00:22:30,000
This is my book.
478
00:22:30,001 --> 00:22:31,000
I wrote this book.
479
00:22:31,001 --> 00:22:33,000
>> Marty, Marty, Marty.
480
00:22:33,001 --> 00:22:35,000
Yes, of course it's your book.
481
00:22:35,001 --> 00:22:38,000
They are all our books when an
editor works as hard as you do.
482
00:22:38,001 --> 00:22:39,000
>> This is my book!
483
00:22:39,001 --> 00:22:42,000
>> And you should be very, very proud.
484
00:22:42,001 --> 00:22:49,000
>> What are we going to do now?
485
00:22:49,001 --> 00:23:06,000
[ Music ]
486
00:23:06,001 --> 00:23:07,000
>> Right, then.
487
00:23:07,001 --> 00:23:10,000
>> Then will you be going off below down?
488
00:23:10,001 --> 00:23:12,000
>> I used to look up to him.
489
00:23:12,001 --> 00:23:16,000
I think this is a man I want to become.
490
00:23:16,001 --> 00:23:18,000
>> I can't believe you did this to me!
491
00:23:18,001 --> 00:23:21,000
>> Hello, beloved lass.
492
00:23:21,001 --> 00:23:24,000
>> You mean -- >> Ah, now,
forget it, forget it, forget it.
493
00:23:24,001 --> 00:23:26,000
>> Oh, come on, Marty.
494
00:23:26,001 --> 00:23:27,000
It's on me.
495
00:23:27,001 --> 00:23:29,000
>> You put your name on my book, Elliot.
496
00:23:29,001 --> 00:23:31,000
>> I wrote the first chapter.
497
00:23:31,001 --> 00:23:32,000
I wrote the last.
498
00:23:32,001 --> 00:23:33,000
>> Yeah, I hated your last chapter.
499
00:23:33,001 --> 00:23:34,000
It was stupid.
500
00:23:34,001 --> 00:23:35,000
It was stupid.
501
00:23:35,001 --> 00:23:37,000
It just didn't make any sense.
502
00:23:37,001 --> 00:23:39,000
>> No, it made sense when I wrote it.
503
00:23:39,001 --> 00:23:41,842
Of course, I was a
little soaked at the
504
00:23:41,854 --> 00:23:45,000
time, but -- >> You
are fucking incredible.
505
00:23:45,001 --> 00:23:46,000
>> You read the dedication?
506
00:23:46,001 --> 00:23:47,000
>> What?
507
00:23:47,001 --> 00:23:48,000
>> Why?
508
00:23:48,001 --> 00:23:49,000
What dedication?
509
00:23:49,001 --> 00:23:54,000
>> For Martin, in truth, this is his book.
510
00:23:54,001 --> 00:23:55,000
>> Truth, huh?
511
00:23:55,001 --> 00:23:58,000
>> Oh, yes, well, this
makes me feel much better.
512
00:23:58,001 --> 00:23:59,000
Thank you.
513
00:23:59,001 --> 00:24:00,000
Thank you very much.
514
00:24:00,001 --> 00:24:02,000
>> Oh, Martin is all pissed off.
515
00:24:02,001 --> 00:24:04,000
>> All right, I took
something from him, yes.
516
00:24:04,001 --> 00:24:06,000
But I gave something back.
517
00:24:06,001 --> 00:24:08,000
>> You finished a book.
518
00:24:08,001 --> 00:24:09,000
>> That's true.
519
00:24:09,001 --> 00:24:10,000
>> Yeah, so?
520
00:24:10,001 --> 00:24:12,000
>> I just finished things.
521
00:24:12,001 --> 00:24:16,000
That's what separates them
from any old treadmill with a pen.
522
00:24:16,001 --> 00:24:20,000
>> You're a writer now.
523
00:24:20,001 --> 00:24:22,000
>> Yes.
524
00:24:22,001 --> 00:24:28,000
>> You don't have to thank me.
525
00:24:28,001 --> 00:24:31,000
>> Not a problem.
526
00:24:31,001 --> 00:24:37,000
>> You mean to say there's two of them?
527
00:24:37,001 --> 00:24:39,000
>> Did Hemingway give you two flasks?
528
00:24:39,001 --> 00:24:41,000
>> Oh, Martin.
529
00:24:41,001 --> 00:24:44,000
I buy these at Macy's.
530
00:24:44,001 --> 00:24:45,000
>> Made in Taiwan.
531
00:24:45,001 --> 00:24:51,000
>> Some fucking hero.
532
00:24:51,001 --> 00:24:52,000
Are you even Scottish?
533
00:24:52,001 --> 00:24:54,000
>> That part's true.
534
00:24:54,001 --> 00:24:59,000
>> You learned a great
deal from me, Martin.
535
00:24:59,001 --> 00:25:01,000
>> I really did.
536
00:25:01,001 --> 00:25:04,000
You taught me to drink like
a writer, to fight like a writer.
537
00:25:04,001 --> 00:25:07,000
You take the consequences,
flesh against flesh.
538
00:25:07,001 --> 00:25:10,000
Of course, it was mostly my flesh
that was taking the consequences.
539
00:25:10,001 --> 00:25:14,000
I never really got the
land of consciousness.
540
00:25:14,001 --> 00:25:16,000
>> You will, my boy.
541
00:25:16,001 --> 00:25:17,000
>> You will?
542
00:25:17,001 --> 00:25:19,000
>> Oh, yes.
543
00:25:19,001 --> 00:25:31,000
[ Music ]
544
00:25:31,001 --> 00:25:35,000
>> Comic actor Tom Covana
and funny man Jake Johansson.
545
00:25:35,001 --> 00:25:36,000
Join David Letterman.
546
00:25:36,001 --> 00:25:37,000
Next.
547
00:25:37,001 --> 00:26:06,000
[ Music ]
548
00:26:06,001 --> 00:26:33,000
[ Music ]
549
00:26:33,001 --> 00:26:45,000
[ Music ].
37610
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof