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[MUSIC]
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[MUSIC]
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[MUSIC].
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[MUSIC].
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[MUSIC]
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>> It's so unfair.
7
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>> Just forget it, Jeremy.
8
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You're not spending $200
on a pair of roller blades.
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>> But it's my money.
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>> Yeah, but it was Nana's gift, right?
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And she wants you to
save that money for college.
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>> College costs $15,000.
13
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What difference is $200 gonna make?
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>> You should be proud of your son.
15
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He doesn't have to go to school.
16
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He knows everything.
17
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>> Jeremy, I just bought
your skates two months ago.
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>> I know, but those are the cheap ones.
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Shot in the back.
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>> Listen, this place is a mess.
21
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Your grandparents are
gonna be here any minute.
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So here, we'll talk about the skates later.
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>> Such bullshit.
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>> Excuse me?
25
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>> I said this is bullshit.
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>> Listen, young man, since
when do you talk like that?
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>> Dad, I'm gonna be 13 on Saturday.
28
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Do you even remember
what it was like to be 13?
29
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>> I ran away from home
rather than be bar mitzvah.
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>> Vaguely.
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>> Yeah, well, I'm a teenager now,
and I think I should be allowed to curse.
32
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I mean, you curse, mom curses.
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>> All right.
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You want to curse?
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Go ahead, curse.
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>> Bullshit.
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>> There you go.
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>> Tits.
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>> Fine.
40
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Fine.
41
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You think that makes you mature?
42
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You think that makes you an adult?
43
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>> It's a fucking start.
44
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[knocking]
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>> I'll go get the fucking door.
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>> That's your boy.
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>> That's right.
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That's my friend, Joy.
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>> Hello!
50
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>> Hey, how you doing, Dan?
51
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>> It's your birthday boy.
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>> You look good.
53
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>> You look good.
54
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>> Hello, sweetheart.
55
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>> Hi, Mom.
56
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How you doing?
57
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>> He's an orange, dear.
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>> Oh, thanks.
59
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>> Well, come on in.
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>> Oh, the apartment looks lovely.
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>> Thank you.
62
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>> So how much you paying
for this place these days?
63
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>> Dad.
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>> I'm asking.
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Roughly.
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>> Tell the court what it
wants to know and get off easy.
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>> 1,400.
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>> 1,400?
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1,400 a month?
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Jesus Christ.
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And what do you get for that?
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>> Well, I get to live here.
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>> 1,400?
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>> Yeah.
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And he won't even let me
get a pair of roller skates.
76
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>> He won't let you get roller skates?
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>> Mom, come on, please.
78
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>> You had roller skates?
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Why won't you let him get roller skates?
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>> He has roller skates.
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Brand-new roller skates.
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>> You want roller skates, sweetheart?
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I'll get you roller skates.
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>> That kid's a creep.
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>> Sit down, Mom.
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Come on, sit down.
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Sit down.
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Sit down.
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Dad, take a seat, will you?
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>> So, how's Florida?
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>> Florida's Florida.
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It's humid and there's oranges.
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>> Yeah.
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>> Let's see.
95
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>> I told you Rose Middleman passed away.
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Cancer.
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Oh, Dr. Weinstein died.
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Cancer.
99
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And remember that little woman, Mrs.
Green, on the first floor with the dog?
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Heart attack.
101
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The dog has cancer.
102
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>> What, are you guys near power lines?
103
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I mean, why don't you move or something?
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>> Well, that's about it.
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>> Actually, there is the other thing.
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>> We said we were going
to wait on the other thing.
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>> We said we were going
to have a pleasant hello first.
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>> This wasn't pleasant?
109
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>> What?
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What?
111
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What is it?
112
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>> Fine.
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You don't want to tell, we won't tell.
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>> Up to you.
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>> Fine.
116
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You want to wait?
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We'll wait.
118
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So sit down, sweetheart.
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Tell me how is school.
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>> You can't do that.
121
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You can't bring it up
and then just not tell.
122
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>> Take it easy, Dad.
123
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>> Well, come on.
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Come on.
125
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What?
126
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>> I think maybe Jeremy
should go to his room.
127
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>> It's okay, Grandma.
128
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I'm almost 13 and I'm not deaf.
129
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>> Please.
130
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Mom, come on.
131
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What?
132
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What is it?
133
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>> I'm afraid your father...
>> He's going to die, isn't he?
134
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>> Your father and I are getting a divorce.
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>> A divorce?
136
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Really?
137
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>> Holy shit.
138
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>> Divorce.
139
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>> A divorce?
140
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A divorce.
141
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There, now you know.
142
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>> Shicky.
143
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>> So what are we going to do for lunch?
144
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>> Aren't you a little old
to be getting divorced?
145
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>> What the hell does that mean?
146
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>> Well, I'm sorry.
147
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I'm just a little surprised.
148
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I mean, you know, you've been married
as long as I've known you, you know,
149
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and I just... Okay.
150
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Okay.
151
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I'm fine.
152
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I'm fine.
153
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>> Have you ever stopped to think
that a family should be the most wonderful
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thing in the world?
155
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That this family's just gone to pieces?
156
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>> We have?
157
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>> Of course we have.
158
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>> You see, sweetheart, it's
so difficult to talk personally.
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>> Mom.
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>> Now this is a nice suit.
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>> It's okay, Mom.
162
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I mean, you can talk to me.
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I'm not a little kid anymore.
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>> You're right.
165
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You're right.
166
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Zip up your fly.
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Look, I've put up with him long enough.
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He's stubborn.
169
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He doesn't communicate.
170
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He's a yeller, not a talker.
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Sesame rounds?
172
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>> No offense.
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>> There was a time when
it didn't mean so much.
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I had you kids, the house, but now...
175
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Well, you see,
sweetheart, I was thinking
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how routine and
predictable my life is.
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>> Your father really never
was able to satisfy me sexually.
178
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>> What?
179
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>> There's nothing so
sweet as a boy's mother.
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>> You wanted to know, so I'm telling you.
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>> I'm sorry.
182
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I'm sorry.
183
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Just go on.
184
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Please.
185
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>> You see, sweetheart, Daddy
doesn't know what to do in bed.
186
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>> Honey, would you like a piece of gum?
187
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>> Darling, it means so much to
me that I can talk to you like this.
188
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>> I'm here for you, Mom.
189
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>> With your father, there
never was much foreplay.
190
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>> Tonight, your husband
wants a little loving attention.
191
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>> And if you must know, he
was never really fond of... >> What?
192
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>> Oral.
193
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>> Surgery.
194
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>> Fixation.
195
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>> Roberts.
196
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>> Sex.
197
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>> Mom.
198
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>> Please.
199
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>> There is one other
thing you ought to know.
200
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>> No, no.
201
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If it's about Dad, I just
-- I don't want to hear it.
202
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>> It isn't.
203
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>> I've been seeing a man.
204
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>> What?
205
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>> Maybe I should come back later.
206
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>> Who?
207
00:07:24,001 --> 00:07:27,000
>> Do you remember Harry Grossman?
208
00:07:27,001 --> 00:07:28,000
From the club.
209
00:07:28,001 --> 00:07:31,000
The balding man with the Bermuda shorts.
210
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>> Oh, gee, well, that narrows it down.
211
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>> He's the nice man who throws
pennies to the kids in the pool.
212
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>> Hello.
213
00:07:39,001 --> 00:07:41,000
>> That's the guy you're
having an affair with?
214
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>> Oh, he's so good for me, honey.
215
00:07:44,001 --> 00:07:47,530
He listens, he's funny,
and romantically --
216
00:07:47,542 --> 00:07:51,000
>> The man who throws
pennies in the pool?
217
00:07:51,001 --> 00:07:52,000
>> You can't believe it.
218
00:07:52,001 --> 00:07:56,000
Things that I only read about in
those books that you published.
219
00:07:56,001 --> 00:07:59,346
For the first time in
my life, I'm experiencing
220
00:07:59,358 --> 00:08:02,000
multiple -- >>
Okay, okay, that's it.
221
00:08:02,001 --> 00:08:03,000
That's it.
222
00:08:03,001 --> 00:08:04,000
We're done sharing.
223
00:08:04,001 --> 00:08:08,000
>> I'm sorry, sweetheart.
224
00:08:08,001 --> 00:08:11,000
It's just that I'm so happy.
225
00:08:11,001 --> 00:08:15,000
>> Well, then I am too, Mom.
226
00:08:15,001 --> 00:08:24,000
[ Music ]
227
00:08:24,001 --> 00:08:28,000
>> Kind of small, isn't it?
228
00:08:28,001 --> 00:08:32,000
>> No, no, no, not really.
229
00:08:32,001 --> 00:08:35,000
>> When did they move you down here?
230
00:08:35,001 --> 00:08:36,000
>> Oh, Dad.
231
00:08:36,001 --> 00:08:37,000
This has always been my office.
232
00:08:37,001 --> 00:08:39,000
>> You know, Dad, I've always been here.
233
00:08:39,001 --> 00:08:40,000
>> No.
234
00:08:40,001 --> 00:08:43,000
This little room, it's
like a supply closet.
235
00:08:43,001 --> 00:08:46,000
>> You know, Dad, you visited
me here a dozen times, you know,
236
00:08:46,001 --> 00:08:49,000
and every time you come,
you say the same thing.
237
00:08:49,001 --> 00:08:51,000
>> Are you sure you
didn't have a bigger office?
238
00:08:51,001 --> 00:08:53,000
>> No, Dad, you had a bigger office.
239
00:08:53,001 --> 00:08:55,000
>> Well, sure, I had a bigger office.
240
00:08:55,001 --> 00:08:57,000
>> Don't make me do it, Pop.
241
00:08:57,001 --> 00:09:00,000
>> I hear you went shopping
with your mother yesterday.
242
00:09:00,001 --> 00:09:02,000
She tell you about Harry?
243
00:09:02,001 --> 00:09:03,000
>> You know about Harry.
244
00:09:03,001 --> 00:09:05,000
>> I know about Harry.
245
00:09:05,001 --> 00:09:08,000
I knew about Harry before
she knew about Harry.
246
00:09:08,001 --> 00:09:11,000
We used to play bridge with him and Arlene.
247
00:09:11,001 --> 00:09:13,000
I saw the way he looked at her.
248
00:09:13,001 --> 00:09:14,000
>> Harry's married?
249
00:09:14,001 --> 00:09:16,000
>> No, Arlene passed away.
250
00:09:16,001 --> 00:09:19,000
Cancer.
251
00:09:19,001 --> 00:09:22,000
>> So, you just let it happen?
252
00:09:22,001 --> 00:09:24,000
I mean, what, you knew
about it and you let it happen?
253
00:09:24,001 --> 00:09:27,000
>> Hey, I figured she'd have
her thing and be done with it.
254
00:09:27,001 --> 00:09:31,000
I mean, Christ, I've had one
or two women over the years,
255
00:09:31,001 --> 00:09:33,000
but I never let it affect the marriage.
256
00:09:33,001 --> 00:09:36,000
The marriage was sacred.
257
00:09:36,001 --> 00:09:38,000
You had one or two women?
258
00:09:38,001 --> 00:09:39,963
Then last week she
turns to me, we were
259
00:09:39,975 --> 00:09:42,000
in the pool, and she
says she wants out.
260
00:09:42,001 --> 00:09:44,000
She loves Harry.
261
00:09:44,001 --> 00:09:46,000
As it happens, I didn't hear any of this.
262
00:09:46,001 --> 00:09:48,000
I had the earplugs in.
263
00:09:48,001 --> 00:09:51,000
But that night, she was packing.
264
00:09:51,001 --> 00:09:52,000
One or two, Dad.
265
00:09:52,001 --> 00:09:53,000
I mean, which was it?
266
00:09:53,001 --> 00:09:54,000
One or two?
267
00:09:54,001 --> 00:09:56,000
Actually, three.
268
00:09:56,001 --> 00:09:57,000
Three?
269
00:09:57,001 --> 00:10:00,000
You, you, you, you, you.
270
00:10:00,001 --> 00:10:02,000
Look, come on, Daddy,
you got to get them all back.
271
00:10:02,001 --> 00:10:03,000
The hell with her!
272
00:10:03,001 --> 00:10:06,000
The hell with her and the hell with Harry.
273
00:10:06,001 --> 00:10:09,000
I don't want to be married to anybody
who doesn't want to be married to me.
274
00:10:09,001 --> 00:10:11,000
Okay, okay.
275
00:10:11,001 --> 00:10:15,000
I'm all right.
276
00:10:15,001 --> 00:10:18,000
What are we going to do for lunch?
277
00:10:18,001 --> 00:10:19,000
You want corned beef?
278
00:10:19,001 --> 00:10:20,963
When I come to New
York without getting
279
00:10:20,975 --> 00:10:23,000
corned beef, what's
the matter with you?
280
00:10:23,001 --> 00:10:25,000
Okay, you, how about the corgi?
281
00:10:25,001 --> 00:10:26,000
Forget it.
282
00:10:26,001 --> 00:10:27,370
They always make
the sandwiches too
283
00:10:27,382 --> 00:10:29,000
big and you have to
take half of it home.
284
00:10:29,001 --> 00:10:31,000
Then you got to throw it out.
285
00:10:31,001 --> 00:10:32,000
Catses?
286
00:10:32,001 --> 00:10:34,000
Too far!
287
00:10:34,001 --> 00:10:35,000
Just corned beef!
288
00:10:35,001 --> 00:10:36,000
Somewhere!
289
00:10:36,001 --> 00:10:37,000
Come on!
290
00:10:37,001 --> 00:10:38,000
Okay.
291
00:10:38,001 --> 00:10:42,000
Okay, Dad, we'll just, we'll
go to the place in the corner.
292
00:10:42,001 --> 00:10:46,000
Do they have it lean?
293
00:10:46,001 --> 00:10:47,000
Yeah.
294
00:10:47,001 --> 00:10:49,000
They haven't lean.
295
00:10:50,000 --> 00:10:52,000
[sniffing]
296
00:10:52,001 --> 00:11:12,000
So you're really doing okay?
297
00:11:12,001 --> 00:11:13,000
What, me?
298
00:11:13,001 --> 00:11:15,000
Yeah, I'm okay. Yeah, I'm fine.
299
00:11:15,001 --> 00:11:17,000
Bullshit, Dad.
300
00:11:17,001 --> 00:11:20,000
By the way, I wish you
and I had had a little chat
301
00:11:20,001 --> 00:11:23,000
before you gave him the green
light to start talking like a truck driver.
302
00:11:23,001 --> 00:11:24,000
It is bullshit.
303
00:11:24,001 --> 00:11:25,000
You're totally in denial, Dad.
304
00:11:25,001 --> 00:11:26,000
I am not.
305
00:11:26,001 --> 00:11:30,000
By the way, I wish you'd stop teaching
him these bullshit psychology terms.
306
00:11:30,001 --> 00:11:32,000
And I am not in denial. I'm just fine.
307
00:11:32,001 --> 00:11:34,000
Really.
308
00:11:34,001 --> 00:11:37,000
Believe it or not, just because you're
turning 13 doesn't mean you know
309
00:11:37,001 --> 00:11:37,000
everything, you know?
310
00:11:37,001 --> 00:11:39,000
There's a lot of stuff you don't know.
311
00:11:39,001 --> 00:11:42,000
Do you know that
lightning fertilizes the soil?
312
00:11:42,001 --> 00:11:45,000
And did you know that eggs
that are washed boil quicker?
313
00:11:45,001 --> 00:11:47,000
Just feel bad for Grandmama and Grandpapa.
314
00:11:47,001 --> 00:11:49,000
Hey, hey, sorry I'm late.
315
00:11:49,001 --> 00:11:50,000
Where are they?
316
00:11:50,001 --> 00:11:52,000
I don't know. I told them seven, you know?
317
00:11:52,001 --> 00:11:53,000
So how you doing?
318
00:11:53,001 --> 00:11:56,000
Would everybody stop? I'm fine. Come on.
319
00:11:56,001 --> 00:11:58,000
It's not like I'm a kid and
this is happening, you know?
320
00:11:58,001 --> 00:11:59,000
I mean, I can handle this.
321
00:11:59,001 --> 00:12:02,000
I'm just glad I can, you
know, be there for them.
322
00:12:02,001 --> 00:12:06,000
Okay. So how are they doing?
323
00:12:06,001 --> 00:12:07,000
Beautifully.
324
00:12:07,001 --> 00:12:08,000
How the hell?
325
00:12:08,001 --> 00:12:11,000
What? Just because we're
getting a divorce, I don't get a vote?
326
00:12:11,001 --> 00:12:12,000
That's right.
327
00:12:12,001 --> 00:12:15,000
Oh, thank you very much,
Mr. I make all the decisions.
328
00:12:15,001 --> 00:12:18,000
Hold it.
I thought I was Mr. Can-Hail-a-Cab.
329
00:12:18,001 --> 00:12:20,000
You're making me crazy!
330
00:12:20,001 --> 00:12:23,000
Oh, hello, everyone.
331
00:12:23,001 --> 00:12:25,000
Yours.
332
00:12:25,001 --> 00:12:26,000
Hi, Mom.
333
00:12:26,001 --> 00:12:27,000
Judith.
334
00:12:27,001 --> 00:12:28,000
Hi.
335
00:12:28,001 --> 00:12:30,000
How is that incredible husband of yours?
336
00:12:30,001 --> 00:12:33,000
Well... How can
another be so hard?
337
00:12:33,001 --> 00:12:37,000
We've been reading in People magazine
how they're naming a new element after
338
00:12:37,001 --> 00:12:38,000
him in the periodic table.
339
00:12:38,001 --> 00:12:40,000
Like we needed a new element.
340
00:12:40,001 --> 00:12:43,000
Look at you, Eddie Charles,
big shot talk show host.
341
00:12:43,001 --> 00:12:45,000
You know, all the guys
in my club love your show.
342
00:12:45,001 --> 00:12:48,000
Well, thanks, Mick.
Our numbers are really strong in Miami.
343
00:12:48,001 --> 00:12:52,000
Well, I can't forget when you wet
your pants in the back of my Oldsmobile.
344
00:12:52,001 --> 00:12:55,000
Yes, and you never
let me forget that either.
345
00:12:55,001 --> 00:12:57,398
Hey, Uncle Eddie,
will you like laughing
346
00:12:57,410 --> 00:13:00,000
really hard because
sometimes I'll drop it.
347
00:13:00,001 --> 00:13:02,000
Hi. I hope everybody's hungry.
348
00:13:02,001 --> 00:13:05,000
I'm sorry we're late.
Your father and I got into a thing.
349
00:13:05,001 --> 00:13:07,000
Let me ask you something.
350
00:13:07,001 --> 00:13:08,000
Doris.
351
00:13:08,001 --> 00:13:09,000
I'm just asking.
352
00:13:09,001 --> 00:13:12,000
You know your father and I
have a burial plot together.
353
00:13:12,001 --> 00:13:15,000
Yeah?
354
00:13:15,001 --> 00:13:17,037
Well, now your father
is informing me that
355
00:13:17,049 --> 00:13:19,000
he doesn't want to
be buried next to me.
356
00:13:19,001 --> 00:13:22,000
You don't want to be married to me.
I don't want to spend eternity with you.
357
00:13:22,001 --> 00:13:24,000
Go get buried with Harry.
358
00:13:24,001 --> 00:13:27,000
Dad, just lower your voice, please.
359
00:13:27,001 --> 00:13:29,000
Harry is being buried next to Arlene.
360
00:13:29,001 --> 00:13:31,000
I want to be buried next to my family.
361
00:13:31,001 --> 00:13:34,000
Well, you can't have everything, Doris.
You made your choice.
362
00:13:34,001 --> 00:13:38,000
By war. Why can't the world live in peace?
363
00:13:38,001 --> 00:13:40,000
Gee, look at the size of those shrimp.
364
00:13:40,001 --> 00:13:42,000
Jeremy, have you ever seen shrimp that big?
365
00:13:42,001 --> 00:13:44,000
Only in books, Dad.
366
00:13:44,001 --> 00:13:46,000
So what are you going
to do with the extra plot?
367
00:13:46,001 --> 00:13:51,000
I don't know. I'll...
I'll give it to Martin.
368
00:13:51,001 --> 00:13:54,000
Well, actually, Dad, Judith
and I already have our own plot.
369
00:13:54,001 --> 00:13:55,000
You do?
370
00:13:55,001 --> 00:13:56,000
We got them as a wedding
gift from Aunt Minnie.
371
00:13:56,001 --> 00:13:59,000
Uh, Martin, I imagine I'll
be buried next to Richard.
372
00:13:59,001 --> 00:14:02,000
Great. Great.
373
00:14:02,001 --> 00:14:04,000
What am I supposed
to do with an extra plot?
374
00:14:04,001 --> 00:14:06,000
Don't look at me.
I'm going to live forever.
375
00:14:06,001 --> 00:14:08,000
I want to be cremated.
376
00:14:08,001 --> 00:14:10,000
Maybe you should have
sounded a public school.
377
00:14:10,001 --> 00:14:11,000
Maybe that was our mistake.
378
00:14:11,001 --> 00:14:14,000
I know. I'll be buried with Martin.
379
00:14:14,001 --> 00:14:16,000
And, Mickey, you can keep your damn plot.
380
00:14:16,001 --> 00:14:19,000
Wait a minute.
You're going to be buried with her?
381
00:14:19,001 --> 00:14:21,000
What about me?
382
00:14:21,001 --> 00:14:25,000
Martin, who would you rather
be buried with? Your father or me?
383
00:14:25,001 --> 00:14:33,000
I can't do it, Mr. Her. I can't do it.
384
00:14:33,001 --> 00:14:36,000
Forget it. Forget it. This is ridiculous.
385
00:14:36,001 --> 00:14:38,000
Why don't you just say it?
You'd rather be buried with her.
386
00:14:38,001 --> 00:14:39,000
That's not true.
387
00:14:39,001 --> 00:14:42,000
What? You'd rather be buried with him?
388
00:14:42,001 --> 00:14:43,000
Mom, I didn't say that.
389
00:14:43,001 --> 00:14:47,000
You don't have to. If you want to
spend the rest of time with a woman
390
00:14:47,001 --> 00:14:49,000
picking lint off your suit, be my guest.
391
00:14:49,001 --> 00:14:50,000
Dad, come on now.
392
00:14:50,001 --> 00:14:54,000
I have lost my appetite.
Which way is the lady's room?
393
00:14:54,001 --> 00:15:00,000
Shattering, isn't it?
394
00:15:00,001 --> 00:15:10,000
[MUSIC]
395
00:15:10,001 --> 00:15:12,000
Okay. Okay. Come out now.
396
00:15:12,001 --> 00:15:15,000
Huh?
397
00:15:15,001 --> 00:15:18,000
Dad, this looks like a little kid's party.
398
00:15:18,001 --> 00:15:20,000
What? What? The balloons?
399
00:15:20,001 --> 00:15:23,000
Come on. I'm 38. I love balloons.
400
00:15:23,001 --> 00:15:25,000
You cut them party favors?
401
00:15:25,001 --> 00:15:27,000
With the kid's names on them?
402
00:15:27,001 --> 00:15:31,000
Come on. Your friends are going to
love them. You'll see. I got some really
403
00:15:31,001 --> 00:15:31,000
neat stuff.
404
00:15:31,001 --> 00:15:37,000
Happy birthday.
405
00:15:37,001 --> 00:15:41,000
This one is from me. I hope you like it.
406
00:15:41,001 --> 00:15:46,000
This one is from me. I know you like it.
407
00:15:46,001 --> 00:15:48,000
This is madness.
408
00:15:48,001 --> 00:15:51,000
Jeremy, why don't you start a present pile?
Go ahead.
409
00:15:51,001 --> 00:15:53,489
Now look, this is
Jeremy's day and I don't
410
00:15:53,501 --> 00:15:56,000
want you to do
anything to ruin his party.
411
00:15:56,001 --> 00:16:00,000
So if you're going to fight or make
a scene, I don't even want you here.
412
00:16:00,001 --> 00:16:01,000
Do you understand?
413
00:16:01,001 --> 00:16:03,000
We'll be good, sweetheart.
414
00:16:03,001 --> 00:16:05,000
As long as she doesn't start.
415
00:16:05,001 --> 00:16:09,000
Okay. Who wants another piece of cake?
416
00:16:09,001 --> 00:16:10,000
Huh?
417
00:16:10,001 --> 00:16:13,000
Come on. Come on. Fudge you.
The whale's melting over there.
418
00:16:13,001 --> 00:16:14,000
Dad.
419
00:16:14,001 --> 00:16:18,000
Oh. Okay. More for me then.
420
00:16:18,001 --> 00:16:21,000
Hey, hey. That's for me.
421
00:16:21,001 --> 00:16:22,000
Hey.
422
00:16:22,001 --> 00:16:30,000
Oh, wow.
423
00:16:30,001 --> 00:16:32,000
Claudia, thank you so much.
424
00:16:32,001 --> 00:16:35,000
This is the best present I ever got.
425
00:16:35,001 --> 00:16:37,000
Because of the blades.
426
00:16:37,001 --> 00:16:42,000
You want a divorce?
427
00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:44,000
The children won't be hurt too much.
428
00:16:44,001 --> 00:16:47,000
I have to go, Mr. Tupper.
Thank you for a very nice party.
429
00:16:47,001 --> 00:16:50,000
Uh, wait, wait, Mindy.
I'll get you your party favors.
430
00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:53,000
[chatter]
431
00:16:53,001 --> 00:17:02,000
You know, if I were you, I would
divorce me and marry another girl.
432
00:17:02,001 --> 00:17:04,000
That's okay, Mr. Tupper. No, thanks.
433
00:17:04,001 --> 00:17:07,000
Oh, come on. Come on, Mindy.
Everybody likes party flavors.
434
00:17:07,001 --> 00:17:09,000
Yeah. Open mine next.
435
00:17:09,001 --> 00:17:15,000
Thanks, Grandpa.
436
00:17:15,001 --> 00:17:18,000
You knew that I got him the roller blades.
437
00:17:18,001 --> 00:17:20,000
[footsteps]
438
00:17:20,001 --> 00:17:23,000
I wanted divorce!
439
00:17:23,001 --> 00:17:26,000
Divorce. Divorce.
Divorce. Divorce. Divorce.
440
00:17:26,001 --> 00:17:27,000
Well, it does happen.
441
00:17:27,001 --> 00:17:29,000
Really, Mr. Tupper, I don't want them.
442
00:17:29,001 --> 00:17:31,000
How could you not want them?
443
00:17:31,001 --> 00:17:33,000
I mean, look, Mindy, there's
some really cool glasses,
444
00:17:33,001 --> 00:17:34,865
and there's a
clicker-clacker, and wax
445
00:17:34,877 --> 00:17:37,000
lips, and look, there's
even a paddle ball.
446
00:17:37,001 --> 00:17:39,000
Yo-yo, I mean, who doesn't like it?
Yo-yo, come on, Mindy.
447
00:17:39,001 --> 00:17:41,000
Just take your goddamn party favors.
448
00:17:41,001 --> 00:17:43,000
My parents are getting divorced!
449
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:48,000
Excuse me.
450
00:17:48,001 --> 00:17:59,000
You know, there's something wonderful
about having a mother and a father
451
00:17:59,001 --> 00:18:01,000
when you're growing up.
452
00:18:01,001 --> 00:18:08,000
A mother who can take care of
you and kiss you when you cry,
453
00:18:08,001 --> 00:18:12,000
and a father who can do a lot of things.
454
00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:15,000
[somber music]
455
00:18:15,001 --> 00:18:26,000
And now on I depend on
nothing, no one but myself.
456
00:18:26,001 --> 00:18:31,000
Listen, maybe we could share a count.
457
00:18:31,001 --> 00:18:35,000
Hey, pal, how you doing?
458
00:18:35,001 --> 00:18:40,000
Listen, man, I just want you to know
that I'm taking home my party favors,
459
00:18:40,001 --> 00:18:42,000
and I'm gonna play with
every single one of them.
460
00:18:42,001 --> 00:18:44,000
Great.
461
00:18:44,001 --> 00:18:49,000
Are you feeling better?
462
00:18:49,001 --> 00:18:50,000
Not really.
463
00:18:50,001 --> 00:18:52,000
Here, call us later.
464
00:18:52,001 --> 00:18:56,000
There's two numbers here.
465
00:18:56,001 --> 00:18:58,000
We're staying at separate hotels, dear.
466
00:18:58,001 --> 00:19:02,000
We're sorry.
467
00:19:02,001 --> 00:19:03,000
We're sorry.
468
00:19:03,001 --> 00:19:14,000
Go sit, and I'll finish up.
469
00:19:14,001 --> 00:19:15,000
Thanks.
470
00:19:15,001 --> 00:19:27,000
So you want another party?
471
00:19:27,001 --> 00:19:29,000
Nah, it's okay.
472
00:19:29,001 --> 00:19:31,000
It's better than the
clown we had last year.
473
00:19:31,001 --> 00:19:32,000
[chuckles]
474
00:19:32,001 --> 00:19:36,000
You okay?
475
00:19:36,001 --> 00:19:38,000
Yeah, sure, sure.
476
00:19:38,001 --> 00:19:41,000
It's gonna be all right.
477
00:19:41,001 --> 00:19:43,000
Thanks.
478
00:19:43,001 --> 00:19:44,000
No, it is.
479
00:19:44,001 --> 00:19:47,000
Believe me, I know.
480
00:19:47,001 --> 00:19:49,000
Oh.
481
00:19:49,001 --> 00:19:51,000
Oh.
482
00:19:51,001 --> 00:19:52,000
Oh, yeah.
483
00:19:52,001 --> 00:19:55,000
You'll probably hate your mom for a while,
484
00:19:55,001 --> 00:19:58,000
and your dad, it kinda
flips back and forth.
485
00:19:58,001 --> 00:20:00,000
You really hated me?
486
00:20:00,001 --> 00:20:02,000
Sure, for a while.
487
00:20:02,001 --> 00:20:06,000
And you won't want to take
sides, but you will anyway.
488
00:20:06,001 --> 00:20:08,000
Mm.
489
00:20:08,001 --> 00:20:10,000
What's happening?
490
00:20:10,001 --> 00:20:12,000
I've never been through
this from the kid's side before.
491
00:20:12,001 --> 00:20:14,000
Sucks, doesn't it?
492
00:20:14,001 --> 00:20:16,000
Big time.
493
00:20:16,001 --> 00:20:21,000
You should be proud of your son.
494
00:20:21,001 --> 00:20:22,000
He doesn't have to go to school.
495
00:20:22,001 --> 00:20:23,000
He knows everything.
496
00:20:23,001 --> 00:20:26,000
Dad, do you know what
might make you feel better?
497
00:20:26,001 --> 00:20:27,001
What?
498
00:20:29,000 --> 00:20:31,000
Don't push, don't push, don't push.
499
00:20:31,001 --> 00:20:35,000
Don't let me go.
500
00:20:35,001 --> 00:20:36,000
Don't let me go.
501
00:20:36,001 --> 00:20:37,000
All right.
502
00:20:37,001 --> 00:20:38,000
Oh, yeah.
503
00:20:38,001 --> 00:20:39,000
Yeah, I feel much better now.
504
00:20:39,001 --> 00:20:40,000
Thank you.
505
00:20:40,001 --> 00:20:41,000
Oh, you have to go faster.
506
00:20:41,001 --> 00:20:42,000
Yeah?
507
00:20:42,001 --> 00:20:44,000
All right.
508
00:20:44,001 --> 00:20:53,000
Be careful.
509
00:20:53,001 --> 00:20:55,000
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
510
00:20:58,000 --> 00:20:59,000
You having fun now, Dad?
511
00:20:59,001 --> 00:21:03,739
Queen Latifah joins
David Letterman on
512
00:21:03,751 --> 00:21:09,000
the late show, and
that's coming right up.
513
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:12,000
[music playing].
514
00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:15,000
[music playing].
515
00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:18,000
[music playing].
516
00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:21,000
[music playing]
517
00:21:21,001 --> 00:21:23,000
[music playing]
518
00:21:23,001 --> 00:21:25,000
[music playing]
519
00:21:25,001 --> 00:21:27,000
[music playing]
520
00:21:27,001 --> 00:21:29,000
[music playing]
521
00:21:29,001 --> 00:21:31,000
[music playing]
522
00:21:31,001 --> 00:21:33,000
[music playing]
523
00:21:33,001 --> 00:21:35,000
[music playing]
524
00:21:35,001 --> 00:21:37,000
[music playing]
525
00:21:37,001 --> 00:21:39,000
[music playing]
526
00:21:39,001 --> 00:21:41,000
[music playing]
527
00:21:41,001 --> 00:21:44,000
(upbeat music)
528
00:21:44,001 --> 00:21:46,000
(upbeat music)
529
00:21:46,001 --> 00:21:49,000
(upbeat music)
530
00:21:49,001 --> 00:22:10,000
(snoring)
531
00:22:10,001 --> 00:22:11,000
(thud)
532
00:22:11,001 --> 00:22:13,000
(bird cawing)
533
00:22:13,001 --> 00:22:16,000
(upbeat music)
534
00:22:16,001 --> 00:22:19,000
[Music].
36348
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