Original subtitles

That was nasty, man.

Hello, Carol.

♪ A soap suds stickle back navy ♪

♪ A scrubbing brush landing craft ♪

- She's so cute. - I know, isn't she?

She takes after her mother.

Well, thank goodness for that.

♪ Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye ♪

Okay, everybody, since you were so good

and you ate all your dinner, everybody.

Is sweetie hungry? Sweetie, pumpkin pie, this one's for you. That one's for you.

♪ Tonight it's love by the fire ♪

♪ The wind plays over the coals ♪

♪ Passionate looks are my fancy ♪♪

She's got a lot more hair than you do.

Yes. You wear that so well. You do.

Look at what I have. Special one for you.

Oh, my God, Skyler. I'll take the pink one.

It's a pink one.

- Oh, Skyler. - I know, right?

Well, actually, they were my idea. You are all welcome.

- You are the devil. - Oh, my gosh.

Hey, buddy. Ready for a cold one?

No, no.

Not feeling 100 percent. Oh, I hope it's not something you ate.

No, no. I just--

We have Pepto, Uncle Hank.

Yeah.

Uh, no, I'm good, I, uh-- I think we need to shove off.

Yeah, okay. Yeah, yeah. Oh. Okay.

Sorry, Skyler, I hate to leave--

No, no. Don't worry about it. I have help.

And by that, she means me. Ha, ha.

- That is correct. - Holly can help.

- Let's go send them on their way. - Yeah.

Let's say goodbye to auntie and uncle.

Been too long.

Say, "Bye, auntie." Bye, sweetie, bye-bye.

You know, it's been about 100 years since we've been bowling.

- Then how about Thursday? - Oh, that sounds great.

Thank you for having us.

Absolutely. Take care of him. Hey. You okay to drive?

Yeah.

All right, well, feel better.

Say, "Bye, Uncle Hank. Bye-bye."

"Bye, Uncle Hank. Bye, Aunt Marie."

All right, let's get started on those dishes. Come on.

You. You.

No, you. You.

Washing, okay? I'll dry. You wash.

You're a good washer. Hello, Carol.

Oh, hi, Walt.

Europe.

I can't believe it. Were you there when she said that?

Yeah.

You okay? Your stomach okay?

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. Okay.

God, Jesus, Europe.

I just--

And, you know, where they were three or four months ago.

She was talking about it like it was a second honeymoon.

We need to go to Europe. We could go. Yeah.

Have it be like a business trip, you know?

It could, um, be Italy. To Lake Como...

Hank? Hank?

Hank? You okay?

Hank!

Oh, my God. Hank?

Hank? Hank?

Oh, my God. Hank?

No. Are you okay? I'm good.

Call an ambulance! Call an ambulance!

Okay. You okay?

Just take a breath. Yeah.

Oh, God, sweetie.

- An accident. It happens. - I'll make the appointment.

All you have to do is show up. For what?

Three hours in the emergency room, all for nothing.

All they did was rule out a heart attack.

What if it happens again? It won't happen again.

How can you know that? You can't say what it was.

Marie, baby. I'm okay. I'm fine, trust me. Discussion over.

And do not tell Skyler. What? Why?

Just don't.

There's nothing to be embarrassed about. Hank?

Luis.

Enrique. Ooh.

Hi.

Hi.

Okay.

Here you go. There's complimentary coffee inside. Have an A-1 day.

Air fresheners are high-margin, right?

At 30 cents wholesale? Yeah.

Right. So I'm thinking we reorganize the display.

Separate the food scents from the nature scents.

I mean, does bubble gum belong anywhere near ocean spray? No.

And pine is still our biggest seller, right?

So maybe we move that over to the cash register, by the 5-hour Energy drink.

Sure. That'd be fine. Yeah, yeah.

Come here.

Speaking of the business,

the story comes first.

The story is is that we are car wash owners, pure and simple.

But if our story is that the car wash is successful,

then what do successful car wash owners do?

They buy more car washes.

Listen.

Skyler, you'll be laundering that money for years.

Decades.

Wouldn't two be better than one?

Well, there's Gentle Hands over by Kirtland. I do love that location.

I'll think about it.

Yeah. Right, right. To be continued.

Okay.

Good morning. Welcome to A-1.

Just the regular, please.

Well, we're having a special on hand wax, 21.99

if you're interested in getting rid of those water spots.

Just the regular is fine.

Okay. Well, there's complimentary coffee inside while you're waiting.

Have an A-1 day.

Please give this to your car wash professional, and have an A-1 day.

Sixty-eight percent. And falling.

Good morning. May I have your ticket, please?

I knew there would be a drop in quality, but 68 percent?

This is not what I agreed to.

I left a viable operation. The rest was up to you.

May I have your ticket, please?

I'm only asking for a few days,

a week at most. Call it a tutorial.

That's the standard wash.

Fix this. Get the ship back on course. We'll make it worth your while.

That'll be 14.95, please.

Listen, this is a complicated situation. There are a lot of moving parts.

None of which are my concern.

You're putting me in a box here.

You know what could happen.

Again, none of my concern.

There's your change, and if you'll hand this to your car wash professional...

And have an A-1 day.

Listen-- It'll only be a few more minutes.

There's some complimentary coffee, if you like.

What's up?

Just wondering who washes a rental car.

Walt, who was that?

She's a former business associate

who wants me to go back.

And I won't.

Enrique, this one's finished.

Get out of here.

Now.

Excuse me?

Never come back here.

Do you understand me?

I-- Go.

Hey. Hey.

Oh, thanks.

You going in today?

Uh, no. No, no.

Good. You know, stay out of there till you're sure you're better.

Yeah. Stay home, rest,

don't even think about work. Okay.

All right? I'll see you later. All right.

Morning, Mrs. Schrader. Hey, guys. What's going on?

Dropping these off. Where'd you like them?

Bring them around to the garage, guys. I got it.

Have a good day.

You too.

Boss, Janice said to tell you a few of them might not have indexes.

We could give you a hand sorting through them.

No, I got it, thanks.

All right.

- Well, see you, boss. - Okay.

Okay, uh...

♪ Your world is in flames There ain't even a name ♪

♪ For the feelings you feel As you watch it all burn ♪

♪ There's a girl in the distance She's calling your name ♪

♪ But the name that she's calling Is not your name ♪

♪ She calls wordmule Wordmule, wordmule ♪

♪ But it's plowing the field That wordmule ♪

♪ Wordmule, wordmule ♪

♪ But it's plowing the field ♪

♪ My friends, look out for hustlers For preachers, for shysters ♪

♪ Them silver-tongued saints That pretend to do good ♪

♪ 'Cause they're geeks Biting chicken heads off ♪

♪ With their witty rejoinders ♪

♪ They ain't nothing but greasy fast food Wordmule ♪

♪ Yeah, wordmule ♪

♪ Some got it Wordmule ♪

♪ It will eat them live That wordmule ♪

♪ Uh-huh, wordmule Yuh-huh, wordmule ♪

♪ It's plowing the field ♪♪

Dude, you are tripping. I'm not dead.

I'm on the starship Enterprise, macking on Yeoman Rand

while the Andorian with the disruptor is back on Talos IV, or whatever.

What do you think all those sparkles and shit are?

Transporters are breaking you apart, man.

Down to your molecules and bones. They're making a copy.

That dude who comes out on the other side? He's not you. He's a color Xerox.

So you're telling me every time Kirk went into the transporter he was killing himself?

So over the whole series, there's, like, 147 Kirks?

At least. Dude, why do you think McCoy never likes to beam nowhere?

Because he's a doctor, bitch. Look it up. It's science.

I ever tell you about my Star Trek script?

Star Trek script? Yeah. I gotta write it down, is all.

The Enterprise is five parsecs out of Rigel XII.

Nothing's going on. Neutral zone is quiet.

The crew is bored, so they put on a pie-eating contest.

The whole crew's in the galley. They're eating tulaberry pies.

Tulaberry? Tulaberries, from Gamma Quadrant, yo.

That's Voyager, dude. Okay, blueberries, then.

They're eating blueberry pies Better.

as fast as the replicator can churn them out:

Finally it's down to just three: Kirk, Spock and Chekov.

Okay, Spock always wins these things.

How is Spock gonna beat Kirk, yo? Spock's like a toothbrush.

Look at Kirk. He's got room to spare.

Spock has total Vulcan control over his digestion. You wanna hear this or not?

Yeah. Yeah, go. Okay. Finally, Kirk,

he can't take it anymore. He yorks.

Now it's just down to Chekov and Spock.

But Chekov, you see, he's got a whole fat stack of quatloos riding on this

and he has figured out a way to win.

He's got Scotty back in the Transporter Room locked in on Chekov's stomach.

Every time Chekov eats a pie, Scotty beams it right out of him.

Where's he sending them? The toilet? Space.

Oh! There's blueberries just floating out there,

frozen, because it's in space.

And Chekov is just shoveling them into his mouth

and Spock's like, "I can't believe this Russian is defeating me."

Meanwhile, Scotty's in the Transporter Room

fiddling with levers when Lieutenant Uhura comes in.

She's got, you know, her big pointies, and Scotty's fingers are all sweaty.

No. Chekov screams.

He sprays blood out of his mouth.

Scotty beamed his guts into space.

No way!

Hey, man, where you going? You're missing the best part.

Just fill this out, bring it back to me.

[HOWE'S "THE BATTLE HYMN OF THE REPUBLIC" PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS]

Yo.

Yo!

You know you can't smoke that up in here.

Yeah, Jesse Pinkman's out here smoking pot.

Give me a break, man.

Pinkman. He'll see you now.

Woody Harrelson, live and in person. Pull up a bong and take a seat.

Hey, I'm kidding about the bong. Don't be doing that.

Uh, sorry to keep you on ice out there, kid. If I'd known it was you...

Well, that Francesca, I've warned her before.

One more time and it's back to the DMV.

So, uh, are we on our own today?

Barn door open.

Barn door?

Oh.

So how is the maestro? Things have been quiet on this end.

I haven't seen him.

Just as well, probably.

That whole thing in the jails. I mean,

when they start to whack lawyers, that's when I draw the line.

This goes to Kaylee Ehrmantraut

and that goes to Mr. and Mrs. Albert Sharp.

315 East Pueblo. It's up in White Horse.

It's 2 and a half million each. Total of 5.

Mr. and Mrs. who?

Drew Sharp's parents.

Drew Sharp? Uh, that's the kid on TV?

The missing--? So but why would you--?

Scratch that. Heh. I don't know, and I don't wanna know. Uh...

The thing is, what those folks want is to know what happened to their boy.

A sack full of cash on their doorstep? That's just gonna raise more questions.

Kaylee Ehrmantraut? That's Mike's granddaughter?

So this is Mike's money? It's mine.

It's your money. Okay. And you're giving it to Kaylee Ehrmantraut?

It's what Mike wanted.

So you and Mike, uh, you've been in touch?

So we're just talking about charity?

Yeah.

Okay, look, you know, um, shelling out money to the ex and her little boy,

I kind of get it. I mean, kind of. But this, ha, ha, this is a bridge too far.

I'm sorry to say, kid, but you're still gonna be two miracles short of sainthood.

Brass tacks. Okay, my job is to advise,

and my advice is, come on, already.

Mike left one step ahead of the boys in blue.

You better believe his family's on the radar.

A couple million bucks shows up, they're gonna snatch it.

The feds have already taken Kaylee's money twice.

What, are you going for a hat trick? I'll freaking do it myself, Saul.

No, no, no! I was just thinking out loud.

Enough bullshit, Saul. Are you gonna do this or not?

Yes, yes. Absolutely. I live to serve.

And, kid, you might wanna think about cleaning up a little, getting some rest.

You've looked better. Just get it done.

You know who this is? Don't hang up on me.

Yeah, there's a problem.

There's 5 million of them here in my office.

No, no, don't. Just hold on to it.

Yes.

Ye--

Yes.

Calm down.

I'll handle it.

Déjà vu, huh?

Jesus.

All right, look,

you wanna talk me through this?

What you were thinking?

What you asked Saul to do. I mean, come on.

It's just nonsensical.

Do you--?

Do you have any explanation at all?

Blood money. What?

It's like you said.

It's blood money.

I sa--?

Jesus. Okay, yes, all right. I said that.

I did.

But it was in the heat of the moment. I was trying to win an argument.

All right? And I was wrong.

This is your money.

Come on, you've earned it.

Drew Sharp.

That is a terrible memory, no doubt about it.

But, son,

you need to stop focusing on the darkness behind you.

The past is the past.

Look, nothing can change what we've done.

But now that's over.

You're out.

And so am I.

That's right. I'm done.

I've been out for about a month.

But there is nothing left for us to do except to try

to live...

ordinary, decent lives.

Why Kaylee Ehrmantraut?

She needs someone looking after her.

Mike is perfectly capable of looking after his own granddaughter.

I don't think so.

I don't think he is capable.

I don't think he's coming back.

What--? What are you saying?

You doing what you did,

offing Mike's guys?

If he was out there, you'd have to look over your shoulder for the rest of your life.

And that's not how you do things. So I think he's dead,

and I think you know that.

I don't know that.

I don't.

Listen to me.

I did not kill Mike.

The last time that I saw him, he had his bag, the one that I brought him.

And he got into his car, and he drove away.

And for all I know, he's alive and well.

And if...

If he does come back and he doesn't understand why I had to do what I did...

well, then, that's on me.

Jesse?

I need you to believe this.

It's not true. It's just not.

So he's out there?

He's okay?

Yes.

Mike is fine, wherever he is.

We both know that he can take care of himself.

And he's certainly capable to provide for his own family. Okay?

Jesse.

I need you to believe me.

Yeah.

Like you said.

He's alive.

Yeah.

Mike's alive.

Absolutely.

You've got to have a counselor. Are they bringing in someone new?

I don't know. Um, maybe she'll be back.

What if she's not? What are you supposed to do? What's Louis gonna do?

He's not worried.

Oh, yeah, sure. What's there to worry about? It's only college, right?

Right.

College. Nothing more important.

Oh, you know, Uncle Hank's still not feeling well,

so bowling's off tomorrow night.

- Really? - Really.

So you're spared a night out with the family.

You do not have to look so happy about it.

I'll be right back.

Um...

So if bowling's off,

can I get a late curfew?

Are you gonna turn off the light?

Have you seen Leaves of Grass?

Hm?

My book.

Walt Whitman. Dark green hardcover.

I didn't even know we had that.

Hm.

You don't think Junior...?

You're kidding, right?

Well,

it'll show up.

What's wrong with Hank? Mm...

It's a stomach bug, sounds like.

He hasn't been to work all week.

Well, good night.

Night.

Mister. Can you help me out?

Spare some change?

Hey.

Come back.

Yeah. You. Come here, I got something for you.

Here.

Take it.

Go ahead.

Just take it.

Take it.

Yeah.

Anything you want us to tell Steve Gomez?

Says he's worried about you.

Yeah. Tell him I already got two grandmas.

Listen, tell everybody more work and less worry.

Guess we better hit it. Yeah.

Yeah.

- Hey, guys. - Walt.

How are you? Good to see you.

How you doing?

Well, you know, I can't complain. Heh, heh.

How's your son's arm? I was thinking about that.

Back to 100 percent. Going to district.

Gonna be exciting. This Saturday?

This Saturday morning. I think first pitch is at 10 a.m.

Yeah, yeah. It'll be fun. Should be a big crowd.

Guys, you're still on the clock here! Let's go.

- See you, Walt. - See you, Artie.

All right, Scott. Be well.

They're good guys, huh? Yeah, they're good guys.

Well, it's good to see you up and about. Yeah.

How are you feeling? Well, you know. I've been better, but...

Yeah. Have you--?

Did you get to see a doctor? I mean,

when one of these things lasts more than three days,

you really should get that checked. Yeah, no, I did, and I'm fine.

I'm, what they say, on the upswing, you know?

Mm. Good. Good to hear. Yeah.

When I heard you weren't going in to work, I-- Well...

Looks like you have the work coming to you.

Perks of being the boss, huh?

Eh, you know...

How's, uh--?

How's things at the car wash?

Good. Yeah?

Yeah, really good.

Hey, did you have any of that potato salad?

I don't know. Maybe. Maybe. Yeah, I mean, no one else got sick,

so I probably shouldn't worry about it.

Well, Skyler will be very happy to hear that you're feeling better.

Which reminds me, I better get back to it.

If there's anything I can do...

Feel better.

You know...

you're gonna laugh, but I have to ask you about this.

Believe it or not, I found this on my car.

I mean, it looks just like the GPS tracker that we used on Gus Fring, doesn't it?

Back when we were tracking him, just the two of us.

You wouldn't know anything about this, would you, Hank?

You okay?

I gotta say, I don't like the way you're looking at me right now.

It was you.

All along, it was you!

You son of a bitch.

You drove into traffic to keep me from that laundry.

Calm down.

That call I got, telling me Marie was in the hospital,

that wasn't Pinkman.

You had my cell number.

You killed 10 witnesses to save your sorry ass.

Listen to me. You bombed a nursing home.

Heisenberg. Heisenberg.

You lying, two-faced sack of shit.

Hank.

Look, I don't know where this is coming from, Hank, but just--

I swear to Christ,

I will put you under the jail. Take a breath, okay? Listen to yourself.

These wild accusations, they could destroy our family. And for what?

You don't give a shit about family!

Hank, my cancer is back.

Good.

Rot, you son of a bitch.

I'm sorry you feel that way.

I wanna beat this thing, I do.

I'm back on chemo, and I am fighting like hell.

But the truth is, in six months, you won't have someone to prosecute.

But even--

Even if somehow you were able to convince anyone

that I was capable of doing these things,

you and I both know I would never see the inside of a jail cell.

I'm a dying man

who runs a car wash.

My right hand to God, that is all that I am.

What's the point?

Have Skyler bring the kids here.

And then we'll talk.

That is not going to happen.

I don't know who you are.

I don't even know who I'm talking to.

If that's true...

if you don't know who I am...

then maybe your best course...

would be to tread lightly.