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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:28,160 --> 00:00:30,480 LOL: LAST ONE LAUGHING POLAND 2 00:00:34,680 --> 00:00:36,760 Watch out. It's hot. Someone wanted coffee. 3 00:00:38,280 --> 00:00:41,320 Holy Mother, man, you scared me. 4 00:00:43,640 --> 00:00:44,960 Here comes a card. 5 00:00:50,880 --> 00:00:54,480 If it's for me because you scared me, that's not fair. 6 00:00:55,800 --> 00:00:56,880 I wonder, who is it. 7 00:00:58,000 --> 00:00:58,840 Jeez! 8 00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:01,080 It might be me. 9 00:01:01,760 --> 00:01:03,440 -He scared me. -No. 10 00:01:05,440 --> 00:01:07,880 Quiet. It's Czarek. 11 00:01:07,960 --> 00:01:10,400 -With him, it's not gonna... -No comments, Jerzy. 12 00:01:10,480 --> 00:01:12,520 -Excuse me... -Quiet. 13 00:01:13,520 --> 00:01:14,880 Dear friends... 14 00:01:18,920 --> 00:01:21,400 In a moment you will see the crime scene recording. 15 00:01:21,800 --> 00:01:22,640 Here you go. 16 00:01:28,960 --> 00:01:32,880 They went all the way there to laugh? Come on, guys... 17 00:01:32,960 --> 00:01:36,000 -Who? Both of them? -Both. 18 00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:38,800 -Both gentlemen. -No... 19 00:01:38,880 --> 00:01:42,640 -Seriously? -Jerzy, see? You are fu... laughing. 20 00:01:42,720 --> 00:01:44,320 Man. 21 00:01:44,920 --> 00:01:46,120 -Man! -Jerzy? 22 00:01:47,120 --> 00:01:51,560 Yellow card. Maciej? Yellow card. 23 00:01:51,640 --> 00:01:54,960 He said something. I don't even recall. A silly joke. 24 00:01:55,560 --> 00:01:59,479 Something about garlic perhaps? That I should add garlic to coffee. 25 00:01:59,560 --> 00:02:03,160 It made me laugh. And it wasn't even funny. 26 00:02:03,240 --> 00:02:05,720 It was a brief moment. 27 00:02:08,600 --> 00:02:10,479 That was enough. 28 00:02:10,560 --> 00:02:13,760 You lose focus, get distracted... It just takes a second. 29 00:02:20,160 --> 00:02:21,880 -Jerzy? -She is sly. 30 00:02:21,960 --> 00:02:26,160 -Sonia sent you to get coffee, right? -Yep. You see... It was on purpose. 31 00:02:26,600 --> 00:02:29,360 So, if we want something to drink, we should ask you. 32 00:02:30,160 --> 00:02:33,440 Sure. Water, coffee, tea. Now tea. 33 00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:36,000 -There is some juice as well. -Listen. 34 00:02:36,079 --> 00:02:37,880 We've got to watch her. She sent him. 35 00:02:38,000 --> 00:02:39,840 "Bring me coffee." And the two of them... 36 00:02:39,880 --> 00:02:42,400 -You get it? -Well... 37 00:02:42,440 --> 00:02:44,280 -Man... -But did he use the signal already? 38 00:02:44,360 --> 00:02:45,840 There was no ringing. Or was there? 39 00:02:46,720 --> 00:02:47,960 And we'll go with the green. 40 00:02:49,920 --> 00:02:51,440 Jeez, here it comes. 41 00:02:56,079 --> 00:02:59,200 -Attaboy. Congratulations. -Thanks a lot. 42 00:03:01,400 --> 00:03:04,200 It was before his time... Here he comes with a drink. 43 00:03:04,280 --> 00:03:07,320 Zosia, you are getting closer, darling. 44 00:03:07,400 --> 00:03:09,440 -And what are you doing? -I'm cooking, see? 45 00:03:09,520 --> 00:03:10,840 Guacamole? 46 00:03:14,400 --> 00:03:16,640 I went to the kitchen to take a look, 47 00:03:16,720 --> 00:03:22,240 there was garlic, stinky, and guacamole. 48 00:03:22,320 --> 00:03:24,720 And for a moment I thought 49 00:03:24,800 --> 00:03:28,600 that kitchen is a natural habitat of Master Chef Magda Gessler. 50 00:03:28,680 --> 00:03:30,880 -That's not how you make guacamole. -Really? 51 00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:33,400 Maciej makes this face... 52 00:03:34,560 --> 00:03:35,680 Trying not to smile. 53 00:03:35,760 --> 00:03:38,200 I've been in many Spanish restaurants 54 00:03:38,280 --> 00:03:39,800 and I know exactly 55 00:03:39,880 --> 00:03:41,840 how real guacamole should be made. 56 00:03:41,920 --> 00:03:44,160 -What you need to do is tap. -My Granny... 57 00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:46,360 -Something fell from your nose. -From my... 58 00:03:46,440 --> 00:03:49,640 Sometimes I do have a runny nose. 59 00:03:51,200 --> 00:03:52,720 Excuse me. 60 00:03:53,640 --> 00:03:56,520 I had similar stuff in my knickers when I woke up today. 61 00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:01,600 No... 62 00:04:03,280 --> 00:04:05,560 -Cool, it's sexy. -Sexy? 63 00:04:05,640 --> 00:04:07,040 Yeah, I've got that. 64 00:04:08,520 --> 00:04:10,840 I like you. The way you are. 65 00:04:12,680 --> 00:04:15,640 Sonia, you've got a problem. 66 00:04:20,800 --> 00:04:22,640 Jerzy was very serious. 67 00:04:22,720 --> 00:04:24,920 Scowled. 68 00:04:25,680 --> 00:04:27,560 Whittled his stick all the time. 69 00:04:27,640 --> 00:04:30,000 Whittled and scowled. 70 00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:33,080 "It's not funny at all. 71 00:04:34,159 --> 00:04:36,360 "What the hell am I doing here?" 72 00:04:37,560 --> 00:04:39,920 Look at him. A supposedly adult man... 73 00:04:43,520 --> 00:04:45,440 and he behaves like a scout? 74 00:04:45,520 --> 00:04:48,120 The stick is involved in a situation 75 00:04:48,200 --> 00:04:49,800 which goes back to long before the war. 76 00:04:49,920 --> 00:04:51,560 I whittle the stick. 77 00:04:51,640 --> 00:04:52,480 Right? 78 00:04:54,320 --> 00:04:57,920 And you can ask me now, "Why do you whittle the stick?" 79 00:04:58,040 --> 00:05:00,720 -Why do you whittle the stick? -Right. And I answer. 80 00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:03,000 You see, I whittle the stick, 81 00:05:03,080 --> 00:05:05,080 because if i die tomorrow, you'll say, 82 00:05:05,160 --> 00:05:08,920 "And just yesterday he was whittling his stick." 83 00:05:09,040 --> 00:05:11,800 -That's why I do it. -It's so deep. 84 00:05:11,880 --> 00:05:13,120 See. 85 00:05:14,240 --> 00:05:18,800 I was under the impression that it was a funny show. Perhaps I was wrong. 86 00:05:19,440 --> 00:05:22,160 It just got very serious. Still funny. 87 00:05:31,880 --> 00:05:33,720 Oh, a performance by the actor, 88 00:05:33,800 --> 00:05:35,480 Piotr Stramowski. 89 00:05:35,560 --> 00:05:37,040 He is getting ready. 90 00:05:40,360 --> 00:05:42,080 -Good, bravo! -Let's go. 91 00:05:42,159 --> 00:05:43,600 Come everybody, let's see it! 92 00:05:43,680 --> 00:05:45,400 -Come on! -No! 93 00:05:45,880 --> 00:05:47,600 -Hi. -Hey. 94 00:05:47,680 --> 00:05:49,920 Here it comes. Listen. 95 00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:52,280 -In general, I... -Can you hand it to me? 96 00:05:53,440 --> 00:05:56,680 I'd like to read you an autobiography. 97 00:05:56,760 --> 00:05:59,480 -At last. -So simple. 98 00:05:59,560 --> 00:06:02,760 -Oh, mummy. -Let's begin with... 99 00:06:04,320 --> 00:06:07,560 Here you go. I Am Not Mister Blot by Piotr Fronczewski. 100 00:06:08,160 --> 00:06:09,000 Jeez. 101 00:06:10,560 --> 00:06:11,880 Autobiography. 102 00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:16,080 "I'm telling her, I want raspberry tomatoes 103 00:06:16,160 --> 00:06:19,240 "and four pickled cucumbers, 104 00:06:19,320 --> 00:06:21,360 "and this lovely lady tells me 105 00:06:21,440 --> 00:06:24,400 "that I've got a voice like Piotr Fronczewski. 106 00:06:24,480 --> 00:06:26,600 "I smiled, 107 00:06:26,680 --> 00:06:32,240 "and I told her that I actually am King Bruce Lee Karate Master." 108 00:06:32,320 --> 00:06:34,960 All right! 109 00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:37,840 -Well, mister... -Huge talent. 110 00:06:37,920 --> 00:06:40,240 This tree will bring forth fruit. 111 00:06:40,320 --> 00:06:43,360 -Kasia, what do you think? -Some plums, definitely. 112 00:06:43,440 --> 00:06:45,880 -Bogusław Linda. -Linda, wait, Linda! 113 00:06:45,960 --> 00:06:47,560 Fasten your belts. 114 00:06:49,880 --> 00:06:51,360 Adam doesn't seem ready for this. 115 00:06:52,000 --> 00:06:53,960 I Don't Feel Like Writing This. 116 00:06:54,040 --> 00:06:54,880 Oh, no. 117 00:06:55,880 --> 00:06:59,120 -It's gonna be rough. -"On the movie set, the director asks me, 118 00:06:59,200 --> 00:07:02,720 "'What are we going to call it? The title was supposed to be Cats.' 119 00:07:02,800 --> 00:07:06,400 "But I told him, 'What cats? It's about cops, let's call it Pigs.'" 120 00:07:07,640 --> 00:07:08,920 Bravo! 121 00:07:13,680 --> 00:07:15,440 Not funny at all. 122 00:07:15,520 --> 00:07:19,120 For me, it was extremely hard to survive. 123 00:07:20,080 --> 00:07:22,720 And listen, I've got this... Michael Jackson. 124 00:07:22,800 --> 00:07:24,240 -No! -Billie Jean... 125 00:07:24,320 --> 00:07:26,680 -Don't do it. -...Is Not My Love. 126 00:07:28,240 --> 00:07:29,080 And? 127 00:07:42,840 --> 00:07:44,000 Bravo! 128 00:07:44,080 --> 00:07:45,400 Brilliant! 129 00:07:47,920 --> 00:07:50,280 Piotr is a funny guy, I did not know that. 130 00:07:50,360 --> 00:07:52,920 -Cool, I could not read it so well. -Bravo. 131 00:07:53,000 --> 00:07:54,920 -Great. -Thanks, I'll see you around. 132 00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:57,680 -Bravo! -Thank you very much. 133 00:07:58,280 --> 00:07:59,159 Wow. 134 00:07:59,240 --> 00:08:01,680 The man has it all, right? 135 00:08:01,760 --> 00:08:05,120 Look. He is funny and handsome. Please. 136 00:08:05,200 --> 00:08:09,000 It's some exotic mix. 137 00:08:21,760 --> 00:08:24,600 I had this intuition with whom I could horse around, 138 00:08:24,680 --> 00:08:27,600 and whom I could crack up. 139 00:08:27,680 --> 00:08:31,400 Zosia for sure was on my target list. 140 00:08:32,440 --> 00:08:34,919 -Zosia? -Don't talk to me. 141 00:08:37,640 --> 00:08:39,039 Can you help me in the kitchen? 142 00:08:42,400 --> 00:08:44,159 Come, we'll slice some onions together. 143 00:08:45,120 --> 00:08:48,000 I like onions. I definitely like onions. 144 00:08:48,080 --> 00:08:50,320 A lot. Onions are... 145 00:08:52,440 --> 00:08:54,960 -Zosia... -Maciej is extremely dangerous. 146 00:08:55,040 --> 00:08:55,880 Extremely. 147 00:08:55,960 --> 00:08:58,120 It's like he's smiling without moving his mouth. 148 00:08:58,200 --> 00:09:00,000 A very tough contender. 149 00:09:00,080 --> 00:09:02,320 -Are you going to eat it? -Yep. 150 00:09:02,400 --> 00:09:04,200 -Just warming it up. -Pity. 151 00:09:08,240 --> 00:09:09,520 Oh, mother. 152 00:09:16,200 --> 00:09:19,400 Is there anything a human wouldn't do to make another human laugh? 153 00:09:19,480 --> 00:09:23,760 I am interested in you for tonight. 154 00:09:24,520 --> 00:09:26,520 -It's her color. -One second. 155 00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:28,240 -I'll be back. -I thought about sucking. 156 00:09:28,320 --> 00:09:30,640 -I'd get ready, you know. -I'll be right back. 157 00:09:30,720 --> 00:09:32,240 -Zosia... -Okay. 158 00:09:34,600 --> 00:09:38,600 Interesting. Zosia's in the changing room. She seems to run on fumes. 159 00:09:39,600 --> 00:09:40,440 Fine. 160 00:09:41,400 --> 00:09:43,120 Stop! Come back. 161 00:09:43,760 --> 00:09:46,040 What's you name? Drac, come here. 162 00:09:46,120 --> 00:09:48,280 Drac, come to mamma. 163 00:09:48,360 --> 00:09:52,400 -Come, I am talking to you. -Look! 164 00:10:00,280 --> 00:10:01,200 Aspen stick? 165 00:10:02,520 --> 00:10:04,840 -Vampire al dente. -Michał... 166 00:10:04,880 --> 00:10:08,520 It wasn't supposed to be a vampire, it was supposed to be a walrus. 167 00:10:08,600 --> 00:10:09,840 You know, a huge seal. 168 00:10:11,360 --> 00:10:14,760 I have no idea why I went with the vampire. No idea at all. 169 00:10:23,600 --> 00:10:24,960 Do not laugh. 170 00:10:25,040 --> 00:10:26,600 Don't do it, girl. 171 00:10:39,120 --> 00:10:43,160 There are cobwebs on my holes 172 00:10:43,240 --> 00:10:47,040 In my veins a virginal current flows 173 00:10:47,120 --> 00:10:50,440 A pinhead electrician Wanted something to do 174 00:10:50,520 --> 00:10:54,320 And installed me here That's a huge mistake 175 00:10:54,400 --> 00:10:58,200 I'm ready for some voltage 176 00:10:58,280 --> 00:11:02,240 But no one seems to fit in 177 00:11:02,320 --> 00:11:06,120 Although there are many Who want to plug in 178 00:11:10,160 --> 00:11:13,480 I think I am going to cry. 179 00:11:13,560 --> 00:11:15,920 Is it a dream or is it really happening? 180 00:11:19,360 --> 00:11:21,760 Andrzej Wrona, in private Zosia's husband. 181 00:11:22,240 --> 00:11:23,960 Andrzej in a speed skater costume. 182 00:11:24,720 --> 00:11:27,080 -You want to finish me off. -A riot. 183 00:11:27,160 --> 00:11:30,640 Hundreds of sockets I have seen in my life 184 00:11:30,720 --> 00:11:34,360 But there was none Who would give me a charge 185 00:11:35,200 --> 00:11:38,440 Virginal Plugin they call me all day 186 00:11:38,520 --> 00:11:40,880 I'll end up alone 187 00:11:41,960 --> 00:11:46,720 In a drawer, okay 188 00:11:46,800 --> 00:11:50,240 What a handsome fellow, and how very long 189 00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:54,000 She is white as a snowflake I ask who she is 190 00:11:54,080 --> 00:11:56,240 Suddenly really it occurred to me 191 00:11:56,320 --> 00:11:58,160 He will be my husband, oh yes 192 00:11:58,240 --> 00:12:01,840 With her, I can stay Till my warranty ends 193 00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:09,280 -Oh, no! -I can't believe it. 194 00:12:10,240 --> 00:12:14,400 I mourn and I cry As I sing this song 195 00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:18,200 My pin has proven a little too long 196 00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:20,080 What now? 197 00:12:21,400 --> 00:12:22,240 Wait. 198 00:12:22,480 --> 00:12:25,920 Well, it's not the end. They still don't fit. 199 00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:30,040 Please, I don't want to see him plugging it in... 200 00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:38,680 Will we pass this test of true love? 201 00:12:38,760 --> 00:12:40,720 To deal with a disaster, for you 202 00:12:41,600 --> 00:12:43,000 I'll use an adapter 203 00:12:46,640 --> 00:12:49,720 It's so silly! 204 00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:51,640 Yet, so funny. 205 00:12:59,160 --> 00:13:03,440 The perfect fit, integrity 206 00:13:04,880 --> 00:13:07,320 We will blow breakers in the whole city. 207 00:13:14,680 --> 00:13:17,600 This number almost got me. 208 00:13:17,680 --> 00:13:21,440 A perfect stage song for the festival in Wrocław. When? Tomorrow. Fine. 209 00:13:21,520 --> 00:13:22,720 -That was great. -Yes. 210 00:13:22,800 --> 00:13:26,280 It will be shown in schools 211 00:13:26,360 --> 00:13:29,280 during sex ed. 212 00:13:29,360 --> 00:13:30,920 Why an adapter? 213 00:13:31,480 --> 00:13:34,560 This is for Polish schools in Canada, in the US... 214 00:13:34,640 --> 00:13:37,160 -They have English there. -That's why you need an adapter. 215 00:13:37,240 --> 00:13:39,880 You need an adapter to get anywhere. 216 00:13:39,960 --> 00:13:42,640 But isn't the adapter an allusion to contraception? 217 00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:43,560 Exactly. 218 00:13:43,640 --> 00:13:45,520 Do not use the "c" word. We don't need... 219 00:13:46,920 --> 00:13:47,880 Bravo! 220 00:13:50,200 --> 00:13:53,880 -Cunning woman. She brought a husband. -Where is the adapter-man? 221 00:13:56,240 --> 00:13:57,680 -Adam? -Yes? 222 00:13:57,760 --> 00:14:01,480 -Did you like it? -Listen. The thing is, I... 223 00:14:01,560 --> 00:14:03,960 -I'll tell you... -Zosia, are you Zosia? 224 00:14:04,040 --> 00:14:07,760 Listen, I am a movie producer. I'm gonna shoot this movie. 225 00:14:07,840 --> 00:14:13,240 Adam's hair, when you touch it, it is like a dream. 226 00:14:13,320 --> 00:14:16,240 -Zosia, I have to... -Can I suck your earlobe? 227 00:14:16,320 --> 00:14:17,160 No. 228 00:14:17,280 --> 00:14:18,920 I'm sorry, Andrzej. 229 00:14:21,160 --> 00:14:22,000 We don't do this. 230 00:14:22,080 --> 00:14:24,760 Am I talking to an actor? I've got a movie to shoot. 231 00:14:24,840 --> 00:14:26,720 Everybody fondles Adam. 232 00:14:26,800 --> 00:14:30,120 You are an actress, too. You can be in the movie. Or I'll take your sister. 233 00:14:30,200 --> 00:14:32,120 -I'll tell you something, Zosia. -Calm down. 234 00:14:32,200 --> 00:14:33,200 Move along. 235 00:14:33,320 --> 00:14:35,440 -It's boiling. -Hello! 236 00:14:35,520 --> 00:14:37,960 -I can, you know... -Hello! Whose pasta is this? 237 00:14:38,080 --> 00:14:41,760 -Some Italian guy's, surely. -Your pasta is boiling over. 238 00:14:41,840 --> 00:14:44,160 -Can I sit here too? -Yes. 239 00:14:44,240 --> 00:14:46,960 I know, I am a movie producer 240 00:14:47,040 --> 00:14:49,760 -and everybody wants to be in my movie. -You are the producer? 241 00:14:49,880 --> 00:14:51,720 Adam was supposed to be the producer. 242 00:14:51,800 --> 00:14:53,080 No, I will not engage at all. 243 00:14:53,160 --> 00:14:55,280 Don't you get it? I wanted to talk to an actor. 244 00:14:55,360 --> 00:14:57,440 -Not necessarily. -Are you an actress too? 245 00:14:57,560 --> 00:14:59,400 What do you sing? I don't know. 246 00:14:59,480 --> 00:15:00,640 Like a small family. 247 00:15:00,760 --> 00:15:03,480 I think that we have overdone it... 248 00:15:03,560 --> 00:15:04,400 Adam? 249 00:15:04,960 --> 00:15:06,440 -Do you need help? -No. 250 00:15:06,520 --> 00:15:10,400 -Now, Jerzy? -I have to offer you this role. 251 00:15:10,480 --> 00:15:12,240 Give me this man for a moment. 252 00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:15,800 -Let the man go when they ask for him. -I'll be right back, girls. 253 00:15:15,880 --> 00:15:17,040 I'll wipe it. 254 00:15:17,120 --> 00:15:21,000 I am good at wiping. I see right away if it's wet or dry. 255 00:15:21,080 --> 00:15:23,680 I look now and I know. It's wet. 256 00:15:23,760 --> 00:15:27,000 I just came upon one of the most beautiful love poems. 257 00:15:27,080 --> 00:15:27,920 And you want... 258 00:15:29,200 --> 00:15:33,960 I want you to read it, but please give it all you've got. 259 00:15:34,040 --> 00:15:34,880 Good. 260 00:15:34,960 --> 00:15:37,880 -You did learn poetry in school? -I did. 261 00:15:37,960 --> 00:15:40,320 -You did go to school? -Yep. 262 00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:44,280 Listen, I'll tell you. I am a movie producer, I am shooting a movie. 263 00:15:45,040 --> 00:15:47,760 The movie's title is Golden-haired Warsaw. 264 00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:51,400 -Something for me, really. -I was just thinking that. 265 00:15:51,480 --> 00:15:54,240 What scenes would I have? 266 00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:57,600 -Quite simple, you know. -Adult content? 267 00:15:57,680 --> 00:16:01,080 No. Just a bareback horse ride. 268 00:16:01,160 --> 00:16:03,440 You ride a horse. Bareback. 269 00:16:03,520 --> 00:16:04,480 Naked. 270 00:16:05,200 --> 00:16:07,600 That's the first scene. The second... 271 00:16:07,680 --> 00:16:10,680 It's in Warsaw, so you are in the Palace of Culture, 272 00:16:10,760 --> 00:16:13,200 and you jump from the top floor with a parachute. 273 00:16:13,280 --> 00:16:14,720 Quiet, please! 274 00:16:14,800 --> 00:16:15,840 He seems nervous. 275 00:16:16,560 --> 00:16:19,760 Where will you be comfortable? Better come here, you know... 276 00:16:19,840 --> 00:16:22,680 Not on the stage. Come here, it will be more intimate. 277 00:16:23,600 --> 00:16:26,000 -You stand, okay? -I'm scared. 278 00:16:26,080 --> 00:16:28,120 -When will you be ready? -I am ready now. 279 00:16:28,760 --> 00:16:31,560 Poem by Adam Asnyk. Read by Adam... 280 00:16:31,640 --> 00:16:33,120 May I present you? 281 00:16:36,160 --> 00:16:38,520 Adam Woronowicz. Adam Asnyk. 282 00:16:42,680 --> 00:16:43,920 Bravo. 283 00:16:46,640 --> 00:16:47,680 Adam Asnyk. 284 00:16:48,240 --> 00:16:49,600 There Was Nothing Between Us. 285 00:16:49,680 --> 00:16:50,520 Right. 286 00:16:51,120 --> 00:16:55,920 "There was nothing between us No confessions, no professions" 287 00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:56,960 A little slower. 288 00:16:57,680 --> 00:17:00,520 -I'm sorry, I... -Let him start over again. 289 00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:04,040 Perfect. The actor interprets, and he goes, "A little slower." 290 00:17:04,079 --> 00:17:05,920 Slower. 291 00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:08,359 He started too fast, and lost all the rhythm. 292 00:17:09,000 --> 00:17:10,720 I mean it to be... 293 00:17:10,800 --> 00:17:12,319 I beg you. 294 00:17:12,440 --> 00:17:15,319 Adam did go to school. You did, you told me so, right? 295 00:17:16,280 --> 00:17:17,560 Adam did go to school. 296 00:17:17,680 --> 00:17:19,800 Adam Woronowicz. Adam Asnyk. 297 00:17:19,920 --> 00:17:22,319 There Was Nothing... I'll say the title. 298 00:17:22,400 --> 00:17:23,760 -There Was Nothing... -Wait! 299 00:17:23,800 --> 00:17:25,319 You wait! 300 00:17:27,560 --> 00:17:29,800 Adam Woronowicz. Adam Asnyk. 301 00:17:30,440 --> 00:17:32,400 There Was Nothing Between Us. 302 00:17:32,480 --> 00:17:35,480 -We knew it already. -Between who? 303 00:17:35,560 --> 00:17:36,440 You two. 304 00:17:36,520 --> 00:17:39,560 If there was nothing, you wouldn't repeat it so many times. 305 00:17:39,680 --> 00:17:40,720 "There was 306 00:17:42,680 --> 00:17:43,520 "nothing between us" 307 00:17:43,560 --> 00:17:44,440 Bravo. 308 00:17:45,760 --> 00:17:46,760 "No confessions... 309 00:17:47,560 --> 00:17:48,680 "No... 310 00:17:51,080 --> 00:17:51,960 "professions 311 00:17:54,080 --> 00:17:57,200 "We really have shared nothing 312 00:17:57,960 --> 00:18:00,000 "Perhaps just in the spring 313 00:18:03,440 --> 00:18:05,200 "There were some false dreams" 314 00:18:05,280 --> 00:18:09,240 Adam is up the creek without a paddle now. I wouldn't want to be in his shoes. 315 00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:14,280 Can you start from the beginning? The damn thing is out of tune. 316 00:18:14,320 --> 00:18:15,520 Okay. 317 00:18:15,560 --> 00:18:16,920 One more time, listen up. 318 00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:20,760 -But you have to present it again. -Adam Woronowicz. Adam Asnyk. Come on... 319 00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:23,760 Let's do this project, okay. 320 00:18:29,320 --> 00:18:32,000 Michał, you've got one yellow card. 321 00:18:32,080 --> 00:18:35,440 I felt it from my head, somewhere inside that... 322 00:18:38,960 --> 00:18:39,800 Now. 323 00:18:41,200 --> 00:18:43,280 "There was nothing between us 324 00:18:44,200 --> 00:18:49,240 "No confessions, no professions 325 00:18:50,680 --> 00:18:53,560 "We really have shared nothing 326 00:18:54,280 --> 00:18:57,720 "Perhaps just in the spring There were some false dreams" 327 00:18:58,880 --> 00:19:03,520 It came up that Jerzy was born to play the recorder. 328 00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:07,800 Kind of funny, because Jerzy does not strike me as a recorder player. 329 00:19:07,920 --> 00:19:11,800 When you look up close, perhaps you can feel the breath of a recorder player, 330 00:19:11,920 --> 00:19:13,640 but from a distance, I could never tell. 331 00:19:13,720 --> 00:19:16,280 "Perhaps this clear creek 332 00:19:16,320 --> 00:19:19,080 "From which our hearts could drink" 333 00:19:19,560 --> 00:19:21,320 -Is it much longer? -Almost finished. 334 00:19:22,280 --> 00:19:24,640 "Perhaps those primroses, moonflowers 335 00:19:25,520 --> 00:19:28,880 -"There was nothing between us" -There was nothing... 336 00:19:33,520 --> 00:19:35,320 -Beautiful, stirring. -Powerful! 337 00:19:35,440 --> 00:19:38,800 I have this author in high regard. 338 00:19:39,320 --> 00:19:41,560 Adam Asnyk-Woronowicz. High regard. 339 00:19:42,080 --> 00:19:44,880 -Someone is cooking pasta? -Someone. 340 00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:47,640 Without the timer... Is it going to be overcooked? 341 00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:49,240 -Jeez. -Jesus. 342 00:19:50,520 --> 00:19:51,560 Got you. 343 00:19:57,720 --> 00:19:59,720 -Hi, Czarek. -It's going to be a woman. 344 00:19:59,800 --> 00:20:01,520 No, don't do it... 345 00:20:01,560 --> 00:20:04,920 -What do you think? -Simple. 346 00:20:05,040 --> 00:20:06,880 -No! -Yellow or red? 347 00:20:06,960 --> 00:20:08,720 -Yellow! -Yellow! 348 00:20:08,800 --> 00:20:10,160 -Quiet! -Wait. 349 00:20:10,240 --> 00:20:12,080 Czarek, do you have to? 350 00:20:12,200 --> 00:20:15,280 You'll see what not to do in this show and you will remember. 351 00:20:15,320 --> 00:20:16,960 You still have a few more hours. 352 00:20:17,040 --> 00:20:18,440 Would you care to watch? 353 00:20:18,520 --> 00:20:21,560 -Yes. -Ladies and gentlemen, just for you. 354 00:20:23,400 --> 00:20:25,080 He's got a problem with me again? 355 00:20:28,240 --> 00:20:29,080 See. 356 00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:35,320 Man! 357 00:20:37,440 --> 00:20:40,440 When I saw the recording, my first thought was, 358 00:20:40,520 --> 00:20:43,000 "Boy, what a huge double chin I've got." 359 00:20:43,080 --> 00:20:47,000 I never noticed his smile. I was surprised 360 00:20:47,080 --> 00:20:49,800 that he got the yellow card. 361 00:20:49,880 --> 00:20:53,280 -Obvious. -It was obvious. 362 00:20:53,320 --> 00:20:55,080 I knew I did it. 363 00:20:55,160 --> 00:20:58,040 We've got five thousand cameras here. 364 00:20:58,080 --> 00:21:01,240 At least one had to catch it, especially that it was so... 365 00:21:06,440 --> 00:21:08,760 They are so a nice. I pity them. 366 00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:12,440 The cards... Perhaps I'll throw them away? And we'll stay here all night. 367 00:21:12,520 --> 00:21:17,320 You know what's best? Sonia first sent you there for coffee 368 00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:21,560 and you got caught, and I went there for her pasta. 369 00:21:21,680 --> 00:21:24,160 -She'll finish off us all. -Yep. 370 00:21:24,240 --> 00:21:26,040 Exactly, with trifles like that. 371 00:21:26,080 --> 00:21:29,080 You've got to have fun. You've got to confront people. 372 00:21:29,200 --> 00:21:30,480 Back to the game. 373 00:21:31,960 --> 00:21:33,560 Jesus, already. Fine. 374 00:21:39,720 --> 00:21:41,920 You actually cannot smile. 375 00:21:42,560 --> 00:21:45,960 Today one noodle did it. 376 00:21:46,040 --> 00:21:51,600 He had a noodle in his hand. He smiled. And that was it. 377 00:21:51,680 --> 00:21:52,840 Exactly. 378 00:21:53,280 --> 00:21:56,640 Sonia is preparing for her performance. Bah! 379 00:21:58,480 --> 00:22:00,680 No. Holy moly. 380 00:22:10,320 --> 00:22:11,640 Oh snap. 381 00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:13,640 She did her homework. 382 00:22:17,280 --> 00:22:18,600 It's gonna be huge. 383 00:22:25,160 --> 00:22:26,440 Merino! 384 00:22:26,520 --> 00:22:29,560 -It's the same merino... -Merino, as sure as gun. 385 00:22:34,360 --> 00:22:35,280 Then I noticed... 386 00:22:37,040 --> 00:22:38,200 that trees were not moving. 387 00:22:40,040 --> 00:22:41,360 Thank you and good bye. 388 00:22:45,920 --> 00:22:47,400 Excuse me, guys. 389 00:22:48,200 --> 00:22:49,920 She needs adapter. 390 00:22:52,200 --> 00:22:54,440 Okay, one more time in a bit. 391 00:22:54,520 --> 00:22:56,520 -Good. -Forgive me, okay? 392 00:22:56,600 --> 00:22:59,240 -Excuse me, the curtain! -The curtain! 393 00:23:01,840 --> 00:23:04,640 Cool sheep. Short story, but cool. 394 00:23:04,720 --> 00:23:09,160 That was very funny. Listen to me, very funny. 395 00:23:10,080 --> 00:23:12,520 -This is not the end, I think. -This is the end. 396 00:23:12,600 --> 00:23:15,480 -That's what she'd prepared? -Might be bait. 397 00:23:15,560 --> 00:23:20,120 Was it supposed to be like that or not at all? 398 00:23:20,680 --> 00:23:24,160 Holy smoke. Sonia said she had those extra gigs. 399 00:23:24,240 --> 00:23:26,480 She was proud of them. 400 00:23:26,560 --> 00:23:29,760 -It was cool, really. -Super. Cool sheep. 401 00:23:29,840 --> 00:23:31,920 You know what's awesome? Now we want something. 402 00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:33,920 -Want something. -Anything. 403 00:23:34,000 --> 00:23:35,520 Now do a horizontal cartwheel. 404 00:23:38,040 --> 00:23:41,080 -Very good. -I hit the floor hard. 405 00:23:41,160 --> 00:23:42,520 Extremely painful. 406 00:23:44,880 --> 00:23:46,440 Adam is getting ready. 407 00:23:49,160 --> 00:23:50,560 He's a cosmonaut. 408 00:23:50,640 --> 00:23:52,760 -Oh my. -Oh. 409 00:23:52,840 --> 00:23:54,960 -No. -Oh no. 410 00:23:55,040 --> 00:23:56,720 No. 411 00:23:56,800 --> 00:23:59,480 Welcome. Hello. 412 00:23:59,560 --> 00:24:01,760 Go away, Adam. Please. 413 00:24:01,840 --> 00:24:03,880 Let's focus, really. 414 00:24:03,960 --> 00:24:04,880 Hi, Adam. 415 00:24:04,960 --> 00:24:07,160 He is dangerous and should be avoided, 416 00:24:07,240 --> 00:24:09,440 but we are not allowed to avoid performances. 417 00:24:09,520 --> 00:24:11,280 I won this casting. 418 00:24:11,360 --> 00:24:13,240 -For terminator. -All I can tell 419 00:24:13,320 --> 00:24:14,800 it's a sequel. 420 00:24:14,880 --> 00:24:17,520 I will not tell you what movie. Takes place in outer space. 421 00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:21,400 Nightmare. I'm finished. 422 00:24:21,520 --> 00:24:25,240 The costume is not much, but it's a Polish movie, and it cost 70,000. 423 00:24:25,320 --> 00:24:28,200 I brought the costume here to get the feel of it. 424 00:24:28,280 --> 00:24:30,760 Great costume, great role. 425 00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:35,040 Great engagement. I envy him the role in such a great movie. 426 00:24:35,120 --> 00:24:36,720 But, most importantly. 427 00:24:36,800 --> 00:24:39,240 I need Maciej and Piotr here 428 00:24:39,320 --> 00:24:41,600 -for coordination. -Yes, sir. 429 00:24:41,680 --> 00:24:44,640 They tell me that in this costume, 430 00:24:44,720 --> 00:24:46,360 I'll penetrate walls. 431 00:24:46,440 --> 00:24:47,640 Cool. 432 00:24:48,800 --> 00:24:51,680 This button here. Top notch electronics. 433 00:24:51,760 --> 00:24:54,080 They brought it here by sea. 434 00:24:54,160 --> 00:24:55,480 -From America. -From China. 435 00:24:55,560 --> 00:24:59,640 I have to learn to do everything in this costume. Run, walk. 436 00:24:59,720 --> 00:25:00,960 -How about sex? -Fight. 437 00:25:01,040 --> 00:25:05,040 I have to practice it all. Now, I want to check if I will penetrate a wall. 438 00:25:05,120 --> 00:25:06,400 Ambitious. 439 00:25:06,480 --> 00:25:09,720 I must practice. Straight from here I am going to the movie set. 440 00:25:09,800 --> 00:25:11,680 -Sure. -How can I help? 441 00:25:11,760 --> 00:25:15,200 You know how to practice. If something goes wrong 442 00:25:15,280 --> 00:25:17,120 -you just catch me. -Okay. 443 00:25:17,200 --> 00:25:19,640 He had madness in his eyes, 444 00:25:19,720 --> 00:25:23,480 which he needed to relieve. I knew he was going to get physical. 445 00:25:23,560 --> 00:25:25,640 -I penetrate metal. -Do you? 446 00:25:25,720 --> 00:25:27,720 -Got to believe it. -What about your lamps? 447 00:25:27,800 --> 00:25:30,480 I should go through into the elevator. 448 00:25:30,560 --> 00:25:31,640 What if it doesn't work? 449 00:25:39,560 --> 00:25:41,640 Hold. Careful with the costume! 450 00:25:41,720 --> 00:25:44,840 -Watch out. -Don't wreck it. Put me on the floor! 451 00:25:44,920 --> 00:25:45,760 Don't wreck... 452 00:25:52,080 --> 00:25:53,760 We mustn't wreck the costume! 453 00:25:53,840 --> 00:25:55,080 Don't wreck the costume! 454 00:25:58,120 --> 00:25:59,400 Don't wreck it! 455 00:26:02,040 --> 00:26:03,280 It's okay, Adam. 456 00:26:04,520 --> 00:26:05,560 Not bad at all. 457 00:26:07,840 --> 00:26:10,680 Adam, hold my sausage! 458 00:26:13,080 --> 00:26:14,640 -Wait. -I've got it. 459 00:26:16,760 --> 00:26:19,960 I tried to look the other way. I struggled not to see it. 460 00:26:20,040 --> 00:26:21,760 And it went on forever. 461 00:26:21,840 --> 00:26:24,520 It was the longest five seconds in my life. 462 00:26:24,600 --> 00:26:27,160 Adam, quick, the sausage. You must regain strength. 463 00:26:27,240 --> 00:26:29,880 -...it's wrecked. -They'll patch it up, Adam. 464 00:26:29,960 --> 00:26:31,520 Don't think about it now. 465 00:26:31,600 --> 00:26:35,160 I only ask who's gonna call Kubrick and tell him it's wrecked. 466 00:26:35,240 --> 00:26:37,640 Take a bite, Adam. Really, don't worry. 467 00:26:37,720 --> 00:26:40,240 -I'm sorry, Adam. -You will get this role. 468 00:26:40,320 --> 00:26:41,680 Bring some glue. 469 00:26:41,760 --> 00:26:45,200 I think Adam won't get a role in Poland ever again. 470 00:26:45,840 --> 00:26:48,760 The costume is all wrecked. Never mind. 471 00:26:48,840 --> 00:26:50,320 Thanks for your fu... help. 472 00:26:50,400 --> 00:26:52,240 Relax, really. 473 00:26:52,320 --> 00:26:55,200 -Please. -I know, the emotions. But Adam... 474 00:26:59,680 --> 00:27:00,920 Bummer. 475 00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:04,280 You know what's impressive? He never let the sausage go. 476 00:27:04,360 --> 00:27:05,800 -Who? -Adam. 477 00:27:05,880 --> 00:27:10,720 -He fell, and someone held out a sausage. -Yes, it was Paweł. 478 00:27:10,800 --> 00:27:12,360 -Bravo, Paweł. -But he... 479 00:27:12,440 --> 00:27:14,960 It didn't help. What, "Bravo"? It didn't help. 480 00:27:15,040 --> 00:27:18,440 Did it happen to you? You gave someone a sausage, and it helped? 481 00:27:18,520 --> 00:27:20,480 Happens to me every other day. 482 00:27:29,720 --> 00:27:32,720 It's time for a heavy blow. Figuratively and literally. 483 00:27:32,800 --> 00:27:34,600 Something they never expected. 484 00:27:37,760 --> 00:27:39,480 -In tune. -Pumping. 485 00:27:42,160 --> 00:27:44,600 -Who is this? -Who's this? 486 00:27:44,680 --> 00:27:48,600 Joanna Jędrzejczyk, MMA, Muay Thai, 487 00:27:48,680 --> 00:27:52,160 kick boxing and boxing champion. 488 00:27:52,240 --> 00:27:53,920 I wonder whom she will knock out today. 489 00:27:54,000 --> 00:27:57,240 -Ms. Halina. -Ms. Joanna. I watched all your fights. 490 00:27:57,320 --> 00:28:01,480 Well, maybe not all, they are usually late at night, 491 00:28:01,560 --> 00:28:03,160 but I watched whenever I could. 492 00:28:03,240 --> 00:28:04,720 Did she come out of the fridge? 493 00:28:04,800 --> 00:28:06,960 -Yes. -She must be training there. 494 00:28:07,040 --> 00:28:09,080 Fridge toughens you up. 495 00:28:09,160 --> 00:28:10,400 She doesn't hear us. 496 00:28:10,480 --> 00:28:12,560 -She's in another dimension. -Hello? 497 00:28:12,640 --> 00:28:14,480 -She doesn't hear us. -Hello? 498 00:28:14,560 --> 00:28:17,400 See? She's behind seven walls. 499 00:28:18,200 --> 00:28:19,600 Damn, you know what's there? 500 00:28:19,680 --> 00:28:22,560 Yep. You shouldn't steal sausages. 501 00:28:22,640 --> 00:28:25,200 It's difficult to stay serious like that. 502 00:28:25,280 --> 00:28:27,240 Thank you! 503 00:28:27,320 --> 00:28:29,760 Excuse me, it is not how you use it. 504 00:28:29,840 --> 00:28:32,800 She will mix it, drink it and then she will beat us up. 505 00:28:33,960 --> 00:28:35,160 Is this guacamole? 506 00:28:35,680 --> 00:28:37,280 -Off she went. -With the green stuff. 507 00:28:40,720 --> 00:28:44,360 We don't know if it was Michał Szpak or Joanna Jędrzejczyk, 508 00:28:44,440 --> 00:28:48,120 -they look similar. -They are siblings. 509 00:28:48,200 --> 00:28:49,680 What? Who is? 510 00:28:49,760 --> 00:28:50,960 Szpak and Joanna. 511 00:28:52,360 --> 00:28:54,480 -They look alike. -They are siblings? 512 00:28:54,560 --> 00:28:56,440 -Regular siblings... -Yes. 513 00:28:56,520 --> 00:29:00,240 They are from the same town. They don't know about this miller guy. 514 00:29:01,440 --> 00:29:03,760 No, you are making this up. 515 00:29:03,840 --> 00:29:05,320 Don't you see, they look alike. 516 00:29:05,400 --> 00:29:08,480 And now Joanna Jędrzejczyk on stage. 517 00:29:10,960 --> 00:29:12,400 -Attention! -Yes. 518 00:29:13,480 --> 00:29:16,360 -It's for us, I guess. -Let us welcome... 519 00:29:16,440 --> 00:29:19,080 -the legendary... -Zosia, help me. 520 00:29:21,880 --> 00:29:24,360 Joanna 521 00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:30,560 Jędrzejczyk! 522 00:29:31,400 --> 00:29:33,440 LOL: LAST ONE LAUGHING POLAND 523 00:29:33,520 --> 00:29:36,800 This will be the time of your lives... 524 00:29:36,880 --> 00:29:40,120 IN NEXT EPISODES 525 00:29:47,200 --> 00:29:48,400 This appeals to me. 526 00:29:50,760 --> 00:29:53,320 -Preserve my dignity. -We've got a problem. 527 00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:54,920 You are the chosen ones! 36155

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