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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:32,194 --> 00:00:33,653 - Anyone inside? - Not yet, sir. 2 00:00:34,238 --> 00:00:35,739 - Good morning, Mr Forst. - Good morning, Mr Forst. 3 00:00:35,823 --> 00:00:37,574 Good morning, Mr Forst. 4 00:00:44,081 --> 00:00:46,249 I have some correspondence and some papers for you to sign. 5 00:00:46,334 --> 00:00:48,918 Don't bother me with that stuff. 6 00:00:49,003 --> 00:00:51,421 - Would you like some coffee? - No. 7 00:00:52,340 --> 00:00:55,342 - You look lousy. - You're not in a good mood? 8 00:00:56,093 --> 00:00:59,387 - Anything I can do for you? - I'll give you a list of my maladies. 9 00:00:59,472 --> 00:01:01,097 You better give me a cup of coffee. 10 00:01:01,182 --> 00:01:03,558 I don't want to yawn in Mrs Miniver's face. 11 00:01:03,643 --> 00:01:05,143 - Yes, sir. - Hmm? 12 00:01:19,116 --> 00:01:20,575 Here you are. 13 00:01:20,660 --> 00:01:22,285 Will you take this thing out of my mouth? 14 00:01:22,370 --> 00:01:24,120 - Okay. - Thanks. 15 00:01:26,707 --> 00:01:29,584 - Good morning. - Good morning, Miss Whiteford. 16 00:01:30,461 --> 00:01:32,545 Hello, Nita. How'd they get you out of bed? 17 00:01:32,630 --> 00:01:34,089 Aw, shut up. 18 00:01:36,467 --> 00:01:39,719 Harry. Oh, you know Harry Selfrine. 19 00:01:39,804 --> 00:01:42,722 Do I know Harry Selfrine? Do I know Harry. 20 00:01:42,807 --> 00:01:44,307 Good morning. 21 00:01:44,392 --> 00:01:45,850 - Jim Mortensen. - Nice boy. 22 00:01:45,935 --> 00:01:47,268 Kazmier, Edward. 23 00:01:48,312 --> 00:01:50,605 Do you know Richard Forst, our manager? 24 00:01:50,690 --> 00:01:54,234 - Hello, darling. Lang. L-A-N-G. - How are you, dear? 25 00:01:55,903 --> 00:01:58,029 - Good morning, Mr Draper. - All right. 26 00:01:58,114 --> 00:02:01,241 When I was a kid, we used to play a game called, 27 00:02:01,325 --> 00:02:03,618 "Your mother wears army shoes". 28 00:02:03,703 --> 00:02:05,537 I'm not your mother. Sit down. 29 00:02:05,621 --> 00:02:08,707 ...Do you know Frederick P. Draper? 30 00:02:08,791 --> 00:02:10,291 Thank you, Emily Dickinson. 31 00:02:11,168 --> 00:02:13,753 - Here you are. - Thank you very much. 32 00:02:13,838 --> 00:02:15,296 Thank you. 33 00:02:15,381 --> 00:02:17,757 What are you gonna sell us this time, Harry? 34 00:02:17,842 --> 00:02:19,300 Money. 35 00:02:20,761 --> 00:02:22,345 Actually, it's a very good film. 36 00:02:22,430 --> 00:02:25,598 We call it the, uh, Dolce Vita of the commercial field. 37 00:02:25,683 --> 00:02:27,142 Is that so? 38 00:02:27,226 --> 00:02:29,102 I don't mean to insinuate it's a crude film. 39 00:02:29,186 --> 00:02:31,187 We were trying to capture several approaches. 40 00:02:31,272 --> 00:02:32,772 What Jim means is that we really... 41 00:02:32,857 --> 00:02:34,607 No, no. That's not what I mean at all. 42 00:02:34,692 --> 00:02:38,153 We were talking facts and figures until we practically went out of our minds. 43 00:02:38,237 --> 00:02:40,238 Losses, gains, ratings, schmatings. 44 00:02:40,322 --> 00:02:42,657 You can lose your mind if you keep analysing things like that. 45 00:02:42,742 --> 00:02:45,785 Then we came up with an impressionistic document that shocks. 46 00:02:45,870 --> 00:02:46,953 Is that so? 47 00:02:47,037 --> 00:02:48,705 I don't think it so much shocks as it's honest. 48 00:02:48,789 --> 00:02:51,458 It's honest, but it's a good piece in itself. 49 00:02:51,542 --> 00:02:54,544 So, you see, we're a little nervous about hitting you with this. 50 00:02:54,628 --> 00:02:57,255 Oh, now, they've got nothing to be nervous about. 51 00:02:57,339 --> 00:03:00,383 It's a shot in the dark, but it's strong and it's attractive. 52 00:03:00,468 --> 00:03:02,886 It better be better than the last one, Harry. 53 00:03:02,970 --> 00:03:05,221 I think I'll loan you my sleeping pills. 54 00:03:05,306 --> 00:03:07,515 You know, I have insomnia 55 00:03:07,600 --> 00:03:11,269 and I stay awake all night looking at pictures, worrying about pictures. 56 00:03:11,353 --> 00:03:12,812 I walk all over the place. 57 00:03:12,897 --> 00:03:14,063 Let's see it, J.P. 58 00:03:14,148 --> 00:03:15,398 I'd rather hear 'em talk about it again. 59 00:03:15,483 --> 00:03:18,443 - We'll talk about it later. - J.P. 60 00:03:18,819 --> 00:03:20,236 All right, Arnold. Roll it. 61 00:03:36,253 --> 00:03:39,422 You're after my money, huh? 62 00:03:41,300 --> 00:03:44,010 You're not gonna drink this? Too bad. 63 00:03:44,512 --> 00:03:46,012 Never let good liquor go to waste. 64 00:03:46,096 --> 00:03:48,765 ♪ Never let it go to waste Never let it... ♪ 65 00:03:48,849 --> 00:03:50,600 Ida. Ida, I adore you. 66 00:03:50,684 --> 00:03:52,685 Never let good liquor go to waste. 67 00:03:52,770 --> 00:03:55,522 - Arrivederci! Ciao! - Go on. Beat it. 68 00:03:55,606 --> 00:03:58,107 - Scusa pleasa. Bye-bye. - So long, sucker. 69 00:04:04,698 --> 00:04:07,534 I'll drive. I'll drive. Give me the keys. Give me the keys. 70 00:04:07,618 --> 00:04:09,911 Give me the keys. I'll drive. 71 00:05:16,896 --> 00:05:19,272 Don't make any noise, Jeannie. Here, Freddie. 72 00:05:19,356 --> 00:05:21,107 ...No, no, Freddie. 73 00:05:21,191 --> 00:05:22,775 - Drink, drink, drink. - Freddie. 74 00:05:22,860 --> 00:05:25,361 ...Drink, drink, drink, drink. 75 00:05:25,446 --> 00:05:27,113 - Come on. - No, I don't care if we wake 'em. 76 00:05:27,197 --> 00:05:28,323 We'll get 'em all a drink. 77 00:05:28,407 --> 00:05:31,743 Let everybody come in and have a drink. 78 00:05:46,675 --> 00:05:49,427 ♪ I got drunk tonight - Shh! 79 00:05:51,472 --> 00:05:55,141 ♪ I got drunk tonight like I never got drunk before 80 00:05:55,225 --> 00:05:58,811 ♪ When I'm drunk I'm happy as can be 81 00:05:58,896 --> 00:06:02,398 ♪ I am a member of the Souse family 82 00:06:02,483 --> 00:06:05,944 ♪ The Souse family is the best family 83 00:06:06,028 --> 00:06:09,155 ♪ That ever came over from old Germany ♪ 84 00:06:12,534 --> 00:06:14,369 Oh. Oh, boy. 85 00:06:20,668 --> 00:06:24,003 ♪ Deck the halls with boughs of holly 86 00:06:24,088 --> 00:06:27,298 ♪ Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la 87 00:06:27,383 --> 00:06:31,094 - What are you doing? ♪ 'Tis the season to be jolly 88 00:06:31,178 --> 00:06:34,389 ♪ Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la 89 00:06:34,890 --> 00:06:38,685 ♪ Troll the ancient Yuletide carols 90 00:06:38,769 --> 00:06:41,104 ♪ Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪ 91 00:06:41,188 --> 00:06:44,524 What the hell are we doing here? 92 00:06:50,322 --> 00:06:52,657 There's just... All of a sudden, 93 00:06:52,741 --> 00:06:55,702 we just joined the clan of I-don't-give-a-damners. 94 00:06:55,786 --> 00:06:57,870 Wake up and have a good time 95 00:06:57,955 --> 00:06:59,497 before the bad fairy comes and makes it midnight! 96 00:06:59,581 --> 00:07:04,502 Say, listen. If there's anything I can't stand, it's a bad fairy. 97 00:07:04,586 --> 00:07:06,796 What the hell do you know about Cinderella? 98 00:07:06,880 --> 00:07:10,049 Look, now. Sit down. I wanna tell you something. 99 00:07:10,467 --> 00:07:13,136 Just sit down. Sit down. 100 00:07:15,264 --> 00:07:18,766 Don't let this sophisticated exterior fool you. 101 00:07:20,185 --> 00:07:22,729 I believe in Aesop's Fables and Walt Disney. 102 00:07:22,813 --> 00:07:24,522 All right, Freddie. Okay. All right. 103 00:07:24,606 --> 00:07:27,025 "All right" my left eyeball! 104 00:07:28,777 --> 00:07:30,445 We met at a bar. 105 00:07:31,238 --> 00:07:32,697 - Right, Jeannie? - Right. 106 00:07:33,866 --> 00:07:36,325 And it was love at first sight. Right, Jeannie? 107 00:07:36,410 --> 00:07:39,537 - Right. - We were thrown out by Morey. 108 00:07:40,664 --> 00:07:42,415 But we had laughs. 109 00:07:42,499 --> 00:07:43,750 - Right? - Right! 110 00:07:43,834 --> 00:07:45,752 Shut up. Who asked ya? 111 00:07:46,378 --> 00:07:47,879 Listen. 112 00:07:50,299 --> 00:07:54,635 I think Forst is a holier-than-thou. 113 00:07:54,720 --> 00:07:58,056 - I am not. - Who asked ya? Now, cool it. 114 00:07:59,141 --> 00:08:01,184 You go to a psychiatrist, don't you, Dickie? 115 00:08:01,268 --> 00:08:03,394 - No, I don't. - Well, you look Freudian. 116 00:08:03,771 --> 00:08:06,689 - I never even met a psychiatrist. - He looks like Sigmund. 117 00:08:06,774 --> 00:08:09,525 Yes, he does! 118 00:08:09,610 --> 00:08:13,362 Do you know that Freud said if you go to the bathroom, it's supposed to be sexy? 119 00:08:16,033 --> 00:08:18,993 Sick, sick, sick, sick! 120 00:08:23,165 --> 00:08:25,291 Come on, now. Wait a minute. 121 00:08:25,375 --> 00:08:27,877 Wait a minute! What the hell are we talking about? 122 00:08:27,961 --> 00:08:29,504 - Who cares? - Who cares? 123 00:08:29,588 --> 00:08:32,381 Yeah. For a minute or two we act stupid. We have a good time. 124 00:08:32,466 --> 00:08:36,052 Who does it hurt? I mean, who makes up the rules anyway? 125 00:08:36,136 --> 00:08:39,555 I mean, always play it cool, always put everybody down. 126 00:08:39,640 --> 00:08:42,100 Standing around a corner looking out the side of your eye, 127 00:08:42,184 --> 00:08:43,476 see if anybody's lookin' at ya. 128 00:08:43,560 --> 00:08:46,521 - Listen. Hell, fellas. I'm 28... Uh-oh! Uh-oh! 129 00:08:46,605 --> 00:08:50,566 I'm 23 years old, and it's time for me to forget myself, right? 130 00:08:50,651 --> 00:08:52,860 Right! 131 00:08:55,447 --> 00:08:57,073 - Down with the middle class! - Right. 132 00:08:57,157 --> 00:08:59,909 - Down with the white-collar workers! - Down, down, down! 133 00:08:59,993 --> 00:09:02,245 - Down, down with the... - I'll give you the swiftest pain 134 00:09:02,329 --> 00:09:03,913 in the behind that was ever invented! 135 00:09:03,997 --> 00:09:07,041 Down with the, uh, lecturers and do-gooders. 136 00:09:07,126 --> 00:09:09,460 - You know who I hate? - Down with squealers. 137 00:09:09,545 --> 00:09:13,548 - On television! - I hate cheap people. 138 00:09:13,632 --> 00:09:16,217 Down with hospitals that keep people waiting until they get paid. 139 00:09:16,301 --> 00:09:17,927 - Right. - Some hospitals are okay. 140 00:09:18,011 --> 00:09:19,595 Down with hospitals! 141 00:09:19,680 --> 00:09:22,140 - Don't bully me! - Don't bully her! 142 00:09:22,224 --> 00:09:25,268 - You shut up. - Down with gossip columns! 143 00:09:25,352 --> 00:09:27,854 And to hell with politics. It stinks! 144 00:09:27,938 --> 00:09:29,856 Kill the finks for something! 145 00:09:31,483 --> 00:09:33,943 Down with Sunday schools! 146 00:09:34,027 --> 00:09:35,570 I like Sunday schools. 147 00:09:35,654 --> 00:09:38,823 Hey, I got one. 148 00:09:38,907 --> 00:09:40,491 What is it? 149 00:09:40,576 --> 00:09:43,202 Down with friendship. I think it's phony. 150 00:09:43,287 --> 00:09:45,580 Atta girl! 151 00:09:45,664 --> 00:09:48,082 Oh, wait a minute. You don't know what you're talking about. 152 00:09:48,167 --> 00:09:52,587 Friendship is a tradition. Friendship is useful. 153 00:09:52,671 --> 00:09:54,797 Dickie, I got the most terrible friends. 154 00:09:54,882 --> 00:09:56,340 I don't care. 155 00:09:56,425 --> 00:09:58,634 - Sometimes you need a friend. - So buy a dog! 156 00:09:58,719 --> 00:10:02,138 Oh, I'm talkin' about us, stupid! Why are you so stupid? 157 00:10:02,222 --> 00:10:04,056 You know how long I've known this jerk? 158 00:10:05,309 --> 00:10:07,977 - Well, Dickie, he's just... Dickie. - No, no, no. 159 00:10:08,061 --> 00:10:09,812 I'm not one of these guys who has a few... 160 00:10:09,897 --> 00:10:12,315 - I know. Ah, he didn't mean it. - Oh. There he is. 161 00:10:12,399 --> 00:10:14,567 Come on out, and to hell with the family and responsibilities. 162 00:10:14,651 --> 00:10:15,818 That's right. 163 00:10:15,903 --> 00:10:19,780 Come on. Let's ball it up, old buddy. We don't even know each other. 164 00:10:19,865 --> 00:10:21,949 I'm talking about somebody deep down! 165 00:10:22,034 --> 00:10:23,826 - That's right. That's right. - I'm talk... 166 00:10:27,164 --> 00:10:29,624 He's gonna cry. Do something. Freddie! 167 00:10:29,708 --> 00:10:31,542 I'm talking about something... 168 00:10:34,713 --> 00:10:37,590 Oh, Dickie, Dickie, Dickie. 169 00:10:37,674 --> 00:10:40,593 Hi, ho, Silver, away! 170 00:10:40,677 --> 00:10:43,679 Get 'em up, Scout! The Lone Ranger rides again. 171 00:10:43,764 --> 00:10:46,807 Masked bandits. Get 'em, Tonto! 172 00:10:49,269 --> 00:10:50,978 Aaah! My hand! 173 00:10:51,063 --> 00:10:54,273 Oh, and I shot your hand. That's a silver bullet. 174 00:10:54,358 --> 00:10:56,901 Hi, ho, Silver, away! 175 00:10:56,985 --> 00:10:59,320 Hey, Jeannie. Hey, Jeannie. 176 00:11:00,405 --> 00:11:03,783 Did you hear the one about the goose 177 00:11:03,867 --> 00:11:08,371 that went down into the subway and got peopled to death? 178 00:11:09,289 --> 00:11:11,540 Oh, isn't that... 179 00:11:11,625 --> 00:11:15,044 Listen, do you know that Dickie and I... 180 00:11:15,128 --> 00:11:18,881 ♪ Used to do routines in college ♪ 181 00:11:18,966 --> 00:11:20,758 Oh, boy! 182 00:11:20,842 --> 00:11:21,926 Hey, Freddie. 183 00:11:22,010 --> 00:11:23,886 Remember that time we auditioned for the nightclub? 184 00:11:23,971 --> 00:11:27,890 Ah, it closed! Hey, Freddie, let's do one of our routines for Jeannie, eh? 185 00:11:27,975 --> 00:11:30,101 Come on. Come on. Let's do it. 186 00:11:30,185 --> 00:11:33,104 - Well, come on! 187 00:11:33,188 --> 00:11:36,148 It wasn't funny then, buddy, and a hundred years wouldn't change it. 188 00:11:36,233 --> 00:11:38,276 Listen, Freddie, after what I saw on television, 189 00:11:38,360 --> 00:11:40,695 I'm not ashamed of any of our routines. 190 00:11:40,779 --> 00:11:43,906 - Now, come on. Come on. - Come on. I do want to see it. 191 00:11:43,991 --> 00:11:46,450 - Come on! - All right! Let's do it. 192 00:11:46,535 --> 00:11:50,121 - Come on, you crazy, shy son of a bitch. - Go ahead. 193 00:11:50,205 --> 00:11:51,664 Up on your feet. 194 00:11:51,748 --> 00:11:55,209 Come on. Come on! Come on! 195 00:11:55,294 --> 00:11:59,255 - She doesn't want to see it. - Come on! I'll do that goddamn routine! 196 00:11:59,339 --> 00:12:02,341 - No. To hell with ya. - Come on! Hey, listen. Get this. 197 00:12:02,426 --> 00:12:06,387 Ladies and gentlemen, the great Siegfried! 198 00:12:06,513 --> 00:12:09,015 Yay! Yay! 199 00:12:09,057 --> 00:12:12,226 Bow! Bow, will ya! Bow! 200 00:12:12,352 --> 00:12:14,228 Aw, come on, Dickie! Bow! 201 00:12:14,354 --> 00:12:17,023 Oh, phooey! Phooey, phooey, phooey! 202 00:12:17,065 --> 00:12:19,066 He spoiled the whole goddamn act. 203 00:12:19,192 --> 00:12:23,195 When the drum roll begins, he's supposed to bow. 204 00:12:23,238 --> 00:12:25,906 All right, you big chickens. I'll do mine. 205 00:12:26,033 --> 00:12:28,409 - Okay, you ready? Listen. - I'm ready! 206 00:12:28,493 --> 00:12:30,161 Neither one of you's a communist, are you? 207 00:12:30,245 --> 00:12:32,330 - Well, uh... - Oh, I don't care. 208 00:12:32,414 --> 00:12:34,540 I made this up. All right? 209 00:12:36,752 --> 00:12:39,420 ♪ There's a 210 00:12:39,546 --> 00:12:42,840 ♪ Moscow Theatre where the Reds love to go 211 00:12:42,924 --> 00:12:46,552 ♪ To see Sonia the cutie of the burleskovitch show 212 00:12:46,595 --> 00:12:50,097 ♪ All the commies love her stripping to the very last man 213 00:12:50,182 --> 00:12:53,225 ♪ They claim it's even better than the Five-Year Plan 214 00:12:53,268 --> 00:12:55,269 ♪ Take it off, take it off 215 00:12:56,855 --> 00:13:00,107 ♪ Take it off, take it off 216 00:13:00,192 --> 00:13:03,402 ♪ Take it off, take it off 217 00:13:03,445 --> 00:13:05,780 ♪ But she didn't join the fun ♪ 218 00:13:05,906 --> 00:13:08,449 Whee! 219 00:13:11,244 --> 00:13:13,579 - Come on, Dickie. Come on. - What? 220 00:13:13,622 --> 00:13:15,956 Now, listen. Get the picture. 221 00:13:16,917 --> 00:13:18,918 - Stand up there. - This is a fine... 222 00:13:18,960 --> 00:13:20,878 This is a fine impression we'll make with the lady, huh? 223 00:13:20,962 --> 00:13:22,421 - Stand up there! - "Stand up there." 224 00:13:22,464 --> 00:13:24,131 Listen. Get the picture. 225 00:13:24,216 --> 00:13:26,133 - We... - Boy, this is ridiculous! 226 00:13:26,259 --> 00:13:28,094 - Look, we're gonna do it... - All right. 227 00:13:28,136 --> 00:13:29,637 ...if my heart doesn't give out. 228 00:13:29,763 --> 00:13:32,390 Are you ready? Now, get the picture. 229 00:13:33,225 --> 00:13:36,644 Pinpoint spot. 230 00:13:36,770 --> 00:13:39,230 - I got the picture. I got it. - Got it? 231 00:13:41,274 --> 00:13:43,984 - Achtung! - Achtung! 232 00:13:44,069 --> 00:13:46,112 - Right turn! - Right turn! 233 00:13:46,154 --> 00:13:48,823 - Right turn! - Shoulders back! 234 00:13:48,949 --> 00:13:50,491 - Back! 235 00:13:57,165 --> 00:13:59,291 Cut. 236 00:14:05,257 --> 00:14:07,675 - Attention. - Attenzione! 237 00:14:12,264 --> 00:14:14,140 Ta-da! 238 00:14:14,182 --> 00:14:18,018 And I'm supposed to act like it's all a big mistake. 239 00:14:19,855 --> 00:14:22,606 - It's wonderful. You're wonderful. - Ooh, Jeannie. 240 00:14:22,691 --> 00:14:24,525 You're great. 241 00:14:24,651 --> 00:14:26,861 And now... 242 00:14:26,987 --> 00:14:29,363 And now, if you'll excuse me, 243 00:14:29,489 --> 00:14:32,533 I'm going into the boudoir to change into something more comfortable. 244 00:14:32,617 --> 00:14:36,287 Don't worry. You shall feel many guilt's but remain pure. 245 00:14:40,709 --> 00:14:42,626 Oh. My heart. 246 00:14:43,712 --> 00:14:45,838 It's beating. 247 00:14:45,881 --> 00:14:48,507 - I'm so excited. - Shit! 248 00:14:50,552 --> 00:14:52,219 What are we doin' on our knees? 249 00:14:54,848 --> 00:14:56,849 What is the matter with you? 250 00:15:00,896 --> 00:15:02,688 She's gonna change! 251 00:15:02,731 --> 00:15:07,234 Ooh, Dickie. Remember when we didn't have to worry about our wives and kids? 252 00:15:07,360 --> 00:15:09,028 Oh, God! 253 00:15:12,532 --> 00:15:13,991 Yeah. 254 00:15:24,586 --> 00:15:26,587 Remember when we had our own apartment 255 00:15:26,713 --> 00:15:29,715 and all the girls would come up and see us? 256 00:15:29,758 --> 00:15:31,592 And they'd mix drinks for us, 257 00:15:31,676 --> 00:15:33,761 and they would cook us anything we wanted, 258 00:15:33,845 --> 00:15:36,555 and then they'd give us their money and go to bed with us. 259 00:15:36,598 --> 00:15:38,349 - Don't you remember? - It never happened. 260 00:15:38,433 --> 00:15:40,267 Of course it did. Don't you remember 261 00:15:40,393 --> 00:15:42,603 Connie and Julie and what the hell's her name? 262 00:15:42,729 --> 00:15:43,938 - The one with the... - I don't know. 263 00:15:44,064 --> 00:15:48,526 Oh, my God, Dickie! You're getting old and grey, and I'm getting fat and grey. 264 00:15:50,612 --> 00:15:53,239 What the hell's she doing in there? 265 00:15:55,617 --> 00:15:57,868 ♪ I dream 266 00:15:57,953 --> 00:16:03,541 ♪ Of Jeannie with the light brown hair 267 00:16:03,625 --> 00:16:12,424 ♪ I dream of Jeannie with the light brown hair 268 00:16:12,467 --> 00:16:15,970 ♪ Hey, I dream of Jeannie with the light brown hair, hey 269 00:16:16,096 --> 00:16:29,775 ♪ I dream of Jeannie with the light brown hair 270 00:16:29,818 --> 00:16:33,654 ♪ I dream of Jeannie with the light brown hair, hey, hey 271 00:16:33,738 --> 00:16:39,243 ♪ I dream of Jeannie with the light brown hair 272 00:16:41,246 --> 00:16:42,746 ♪ Light brown hair 273 00:16:42,831 --> 00:16:45,416 ♪ I dream of Freddie with the light brown hair 274 00:16:45,500 --> 00:16:48,836 ♪ I dream of Jeannie 275 00:16:48,962 --> 00:16:52,298 ♪ With the light brown hair 276 00:16:58,305 --> 00:17:01,181 ♪ I dream of Jeannie with the... 277 00:17:01,308 --> 00:17:05,436 ♪ I dream of Dickie with the silver hair 278 00:17:05,979 --> 00:17:09,148 ♪ I dream of Jeannie with the light brown hair 279 00:17:09,190 --> 00:17:11,275 ♪ I dream of Jeannie... 280 00:17:11,359 --> 00:17:12,818 ♪ Light brown hair 281 00:17:12,861 --> 00:17:14,862 ♪ I dream... 282 00:17:16,656 --> 00:17:18,699 Sing it, Dickie. 283 00:17:19,951 --> 00:17:21,493 Hey, uh... 284 00:17:30,712 --> 00:17:33,881 ♪ I dream of Jeannie 285 00:17:33,965 --> 00:17:37,551 ♪ With the light brown hair 286 00:17:38,053 --> 00:17:41,555 ♪ Borne like a vapour 287 00:17:44,559 --> 00:17:46,894 ♪ I dream 288 00:17:47,020 --> 00:17:51,649 ♪ Of Jeannie with her light brown hair 289 00:17:59,032 --> 00:18:01,200 By the way, Jeannie, what do you charge? 290 00:18:01,242 --> 00:18:05,746 ♪ I dream of Jeannie with the light... ♪ 291 00:18:10,043 --> 00:18:11,502 Oh, Freddie. 292 00:18:11,586 --> 00:18:14,546 Aw, Freddie. Aw, no, Freddie. 293 00:18:15,423 --> 00:18:17,841 Don't spoil it, Freddie. Please. 294 00:18:25,433 --> 00:18:27,059 Spoil what? 295 00:18:28,561 --> 00:18:30,854 Honey, I'm game for anything. 296 00:18:31,356 --> 00:18:34,233 I just want to know how much you charge. 297 00:18:34,567 --> 00:18:36,026 It's legitimate, isn't it? 298 00:18:36,861 --> 00:18:38,904 I know I have to pay. 299 00:18:39,364 --> 00:18:40,906 I'm not too schooled in these things, 300 00:18:40,949 --> 00:18:42,449 but I know somewhere along the line, 301 00:18:42,534 --> 00:18:44,952 your little hand's gonna find its way into my pocket. 302 00:18:45,370 --> 00:18:48,038 You're shocked, aren't you, old Dickie, old pal? 303 00:18:48,123 --> 00:18:49,707 What do you think she is? 304 00:18:49,791 --> 00:18:51,792 You think she's some clean towel that's never been used? 305 00:18:53,128 --> 00:18:55,629 My God, Dickie. You think you don't pay? 306 00:18:55,755 --> 00:18:59,216 How many times a week does Maria ask you for some money? 307 00:18:59,300 --> 00:19:00,884 Money, Charlie, is a necessity. 308 00:19:00,969 --> 00:19:04,972 And don't you think that you don't work for it and pay for it. 309 00:19:07,976 --> 00:19:09,768 My God, wait. What is this? 310 00:19:09,811 --> 00:19:12,396 He thinks I'm insulting you. I'm offering you. 311 00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:14,314 Hell, look! 312 00:19:15,066 --> 00:19:16,817 What's the matter? 313 00:19:17,610 --> 00:19:19,987 If I went to one of those fancy restaurants, 314 00:19:20,071 --> 00:19:22,990 I'd probably tip the head waiter, the waiter, the busboy, 315 00:19:23,074 --> 00:19:25,617 and a hundred bucks goes flying down the drain. 316 00:19:25,660 --> 00:19:28,996 And I couldn't have any more fun than I could with Jeannie here. 317 00:19:29,080 --> 00:19:32,082 - Let go of my girl. - Dickie, wait. Please. 318 00:19:32,167 --> 00:19:33,751 Please. Please. Please. 319 00:19:33,835 --> 00:19:35,502 Don't be shocked. 320 00:19:35,628 --> 00:19:39,298 It's like this. Fred is a very sad man. 321 00:19:39,591 --> 00:19:41,675 - Now, you... - Will you let me finish! 322 00:19:41,760 --> 00:19:44,344 Because you're a man who doesn't say what you mean very well. 323 00:19:44,387 --> 00:19:46,221 What you meant was this was a wonderful evening, 324 00:19:46,347 --> 00:19:48,182 and you enjoy my house and you like me. 325 00:19:48,308 --> 00:19:50,684 But like you said, you're crude. 326 00:19:55,190 --> 00:19:58,984 I'm sorry. Honey, I was only tryin' to be funny. 327 00:19:59,027 --> 00:20:00,736 I thought you said you were trying to be funny. 328 00:20:00,862 --> 00:20:05,407 Well, you go with your... You go! If you're in such a damned hurry. 329 00:20:05,533 --> 00:20:07,868 My reputation's at stake here! 330 00:20:30,183 --> 00:20:31,600 Good night. 331 00:20:34,270 --> 00:20:36,104 Good night, Jeannie. 332 00:20:40,068 --> 00:20:41,902 I'm sorry. 333 00:20:55,083 --> 00:20:57,251 I don't know how you do it. 334 00:20:59,546 --> 00:21:01,088 Well, I just... 335 00:21:03,633 --> 00:21:07,261 I just close my eyes and I... 336 00:21:09,055 --> 00:21:11,056 I see how much liquor I can swallow. 337 00:21:13,476 --> 00:21:17,896 I pray that I'll die and be martyred by the church 338 00:21:17,939 --> 00:21:20,107 for my service to humanity. 339 00:21:22,443 --> 00:21:24,319 You're a lovely girl. 340 00:21:28,241 --> 00:21:30,284 I'm too old to be lovely. 341 00:21:30,952 --> 00:21:33,453 And I haven't got a heart of gold. 342 00:21:34,122 --> 00:21:35,998 The nights are long, and Little Orphan Annie 343 00:21:36,124 --> 00:21:38,959 of Hard Knoxville gets tough, you know. 344 00:21:41,796 --> 00:21:43,422 I think I'd better go. 345 00:21:43,464 --> 00:21:45,591 Then go ahead! Get the hell out! 346 00:21:45,633 --> 00:21:47,634 Beat it, snowball! 347 00:21:48,678 --> 00:21:50,262 - Right? - Right. 348 00:21:51,180 --> 00:21:53,307 You're on your own again. 349 00:22:13,661 --> 00:22:15,454 Yeah. Uh-huh. 350 00:22:36,392 --> 00:22:38,018 Come here. 351 00:22:38,061 --> 00:22:40,520 Well, how did you find that out? 352 00:22:42,815 --> 00:22:45,859 It's very important, but I don't think there's anything you can do about it. 353 00:22:45,985 --> 00:22:48,695 - Maria, I want to talk to ya. - Mmm-hmm. 354 00:22:51,407 --> 00:22:53,700 Louise, I just came home from the office. 355 00:22:53,826 --> 00:22:57,871 Yes, I had a very hard day and something important came up. 356 00:22:57,914 --> 00:23:00,207 Can she call you back later? 357 00:23:10,176 --> 00:23:11,593 Yeah? 358 00:23:24,607 --> 00:23:27,567 Louise, we'll call you back later. Goodbye. 359 00:23:28,736 --> 00:23:31,238 I'm gonna have a drink. You kill me. 360 00:23:31,364 --> 00:23:34,241 - Yeah? Why do I kill ya? 361 00:23:34,367 --> 00:23:36,243 Why do I kill ya? 362 00:23:43,918 --> 00:23:46,128 Why do I kill ya, huh? 363 00:23:46,254 --> 00:23:48,213 Why? What do you want to drink? 364 00:23:48,256 --> 00:23:50,882 Whatever it is, I want it on the rocks, straight and dirty, 365 00:23:50,925 --> 00:23:53,552 because I feel very, very bitchy tonight. 366 00:23:53,594 --> 00:23:56,805 Well, I feel very, very bitchy, too. That makes two of us. 367 00:23:56,931 --> 00:23:58,432 Blue Monday for me today. 368 00:23:58,474 --> 00:24:02,269 All day the phone rang and rang. "Hello, Maria?" "Goodbye, Maria." 369 00:24:02,311 --> 00:24:06,314 - "Hello, darling." "Goodbye, darling." - Hello, darling. 370 00:24:06,441 --> 00:24:08,817 Your sense of humour's going to destroy our marriage someday. 371 00:24:08,943 --> 00:24:10,402 I wasn't trying to be funny. 372 00:24:12,113 --> 00:24:14,156 Listen, Maria, go get me a cigarette, will ya? 373 00:24:14,282 --> 00:24:16,950 Ooh, we're out! I'm sorry. I smoked myself silly today. 374 00:24:16,993 --> 00:24:20,120 - You're such a conformist. - Like hell I am! 375 00:24:20,246 --> 00:24:23,457 Dickie, why don't you take me to a movie, okay? 376 00:24:23,499 --> 00:24:25,625 Why doesn't somebody fill these stupid boxes? 377 00:24:25,668 --> 00:24:27,127 You smoke too much. 378 00:24:27,253 --> 00:24:29,337 There's a Bergman film in the neighbourhood. 379 00:24:29,464 --> 00:24:31,798 I don't feel like getting depressed tonight. 380 00:24:32,967 --> 00:24:35,469 But you always love foreign film. 381 00:24:36,512 --> 00:24:39,681 - Where the hell are the cigarettes? - We're out! 382 00:24:39,807 --> 00:24:44,436 - What are you getting so huffy about? - There's nothing on television tonight. 383 00:24:44,479 --> 00:24:47,147 If I had a cigarette, I could think. 384 00:24:49,317 --> 00:24:51,193 - You're hungry. - Right! 385 00:24:51,319 --> 00:24:53,028 But you're always hungry. 386 00:24:53,154 --> 00:24:56,364 That's because I always come home at dinner time. 387 00:24:58,159 --> 00:25:01,119 Oh, I love you when you look like that. 388 00:25:01,162 --> 00:25:04,790 Look like what? Tell me quick, and I'll write it down. 389 00:25:05,541 --> 00:25:09,127 - You wanna fight, huh? - Yeah, I wanna fight. 390 00:25:09,170 --> 00:25:11,630 Smug. I knew it the first time I looked at you. 391 00:25:11,672 --> 00:25:13,673 - The better-than-you expression. - That's right. 392 00:25:13,800 --> 00:25:16,009 I'm the pompous puke of all times. 393 00:25:16,052 --> 00:25:18,678 Yeah, and you smell like a brewery, too. 394 00:25:18,721 --> 00:25:21,181 And I smell like a brewery, too. 395 00:25:30,358 --> 00:25:33,151 And you'll take me to a movie show? 396 00:25:33,194 --> 00:25:35,862 I'll take you 397 00:25:36,489 --> 00:25:39,825 any place that your little heart desires 398 00:25:40,576 --> 00:25:46,498 if you'll just keep that lovely mouth of yours closed for a couple of seconds. 399 00:25:46,541 --> 00:25:48,542 I have a lovely dinner for you. 400 00:25:48,668 --> 00:25:52,754 Come on. Take off your coat and stay a while, bright eyes. 401 00:25:52,880 --> 00:25:55,006 Well, that sounds like some kind of a proposition. 402 00:25:55,049 --> 00:25:56,550 Oh, Dickie, you're so innocent, 403 00:25:56,592 --> 00:25:58,552 it's hard to get through to you sometimes. 404 00:25:58,678 --> 00:26:00,679 Oh, really? 405 00:26:13,734 --> 00:26:15,902 - No place like home. - What? 406 00:26:18,197 --> 00:26:21,116 - I said have you ever been to Rome? - Italy? 407 00:26:21,450 --> 00:26:24,744 I love you. 408 00:26:24,787 --> 00:26:27,205 But you always love me when I bring food. 409 00:26:27,248 --> 00:26:30,709 - Well, that's because I'm a glutton. - Were you with Fred tonight? 410 00:26:30,751 --> 00:26:33,879 - Yeah. - I think he's a terrible father. 411 00:26:33,921 --> 00:26:37,048 He never talks to the kids or plays with 'em. 412 00:26:38,551 --> 00:26:40,260 The kids are grown up. 413 00:26:40,386 --> 00:26:42,596 Nineteen isn't grown. 414 00:26:45,266 --> 00:26:47,434 I don't like Fred any more. 415 00:26:47,935 --> 00:26:50,103 - Well, why don't you like Fred any more? - Because 416 00:26:52,064 --> 00:26:54,482 he cheats on his wife. 417 00:26:59,572 --> 00:27:02,324 - Now, who told you that? - Louise. 418 00:27:03,993 --> 00:27:05,994 Oh, Louise. 419 00:27:06,662 --> 00:27:09,581 - Oh. - Fred talks in his sleep. 420 00:27:09,624 --> 00:27:14,294 He comes home at night and he just stares at her. Doesn't say a word. 421 00:27:14,337 --> 00:27:16,922 They have a drink. Silence. 422 00:27:17,256 --> 00:27:20,258 - They eat, they say nothing. - Salt and pepper, please. 423 00:27:20,301 --> 00:27:23,136 They get into bed and they say nothing. 424 00:27:24,138 --> 00:27:26,973 And I forgot, he just barely looks at the kids, 425 00:27:27,016 --> 00:27:29,809 and Louise says that it's because of that. 426 00:27:31,395 --> 00:27:32,854 Because of what? 427 00:27:33,564 --> 00:27:36,983 Well, she reads, and he just rolls over and goes to sleep 428 00:27:37,026 --> 00:27:39,361 and talks to all these different girls. 429 00:27:39,487 --> 00:27:43,323 And Louise says that they have to be in compromising positions. 430 00:27:46,869 --> 00:27:48,828 Good old Freddie. 431 00:27:58,673 --> 00:28:01,007 He says things like... 432 00:28:01,050 --> 00:28:03,843 - Like, "Roll over". 433 00:28:04,595 --> 00:28:07,055 "Let's try that again." Yeah. 434 00:28:08,182 --> 00:28:09,599 Things like that. 435 00:28:10,393 --> 00:28:11,851 Things like that, huh? 436 00:28:12,395 --> 00:28:14,604 And do you know what he did with... 437 00:28:14,689 --> 00:28:17,399 Do you know what he did with Darlene? 438 00:28:17,525 --> 00:28:20,235 Darlene? Who the hell's Darlene? 439 00:28:20,361 --> 00:28:22,612 The girl in his dream. 440 00:28:28,035 --> 00:28:30,370 Well, what did he do with Darlene? 441 00:28:32,290 --> 00:28:33,748 You ain't gonna tell me? 442 00:28:35,459 --> 00:28:37,544 He kiss... He kisses her. 443 00:28:40,298 --> 00:28:41,756 You know. 444 00:28:50,891 --> 00:28:53,935 You mean, he goes... 445 00:29:03,321 --> 00:29:05,613 You... You mean he goes... 446 00:29:12,246 --> 00:29:14,581 - Bad! 447 00:29:15,499 --> 00:29:18,168 - Is that what you mean? - No. 448 00:29:23,758 --> 00:29:25,759 - No. 449 00:29:26,844 --> 00:29:29,304 - I... Yes, but... 450 00:29:33,434 --> 00:29:37,479 He says for her to do it to him. 451 00:29:38,689 --> 00:29:41,024 - That's funny. - When he gets... 452 00:29:43,652 --> 00:29:46,780 - Well... - Well, that's what he said. 453 00:29:46,822 --> 00:29:50,950 Yeah, well, you know, Freddie's getting on in years. 454 00:29:51,035 --> 00:29:53,161 And a man Freddie's age... 455 00:29:53,287 --> 00:29:55,288 You're Fred's age! 456 00:29:56,707 --> 00:30:00,627 Yeah, but sexual nightmares are not one of my problems. 457 00:30:00,711 --> 00:30:05,131 Besides, what the hell has that got to do with Fred being a good father? 458 00:30:08,719 --> 00:30:10,220 Well, I... 459 00:30:12,515 --> 00:30:15,642 I'm sorry I talk too much. 460 00:30:15,976 --> 00:30:20,647 Well, you know, Fred puts up with his kids' asinine friends. 461 00:30:21,148 --> 00:30:22,690 - You know that? - I... 462 00:30:22,817 --> 00:30:25,318 His kids wanna drink, he lets 'em drink. 463 00:30:25,361 --> 00:30:27,153 They want to smoke, he lets them smoke. 464 00:30:27,238 --> 00:30:30,657 He... Well, he sends the sons of bitches to college. 465 00:30:30,741 --> 00:30:33,243 They each have their own cars, you know. 466 00:30:33,327 --> 00:30:37,205 And he gives them 50 bucks a week spending money. 467 00:30:37,331 --> 00:30:39,165 Can you imagine that? 468 00:30:39,875 --> 00:30:42,210 And his daughter is beautiful. 469 00:30:42,336 --> 00:30:46,089 His son is a big 6'3" hunk of man, 470 00:30:46,173 --> 00:30:47,882 and the girls think he's cute. 471 00:30:48,008 --> 00:30:52,512 And he's got Simon, a 1-year-old baby. 472 00:30:52,763 --> 00:30:55,890 I wish I was that kind of a father. 473 00:30:56,016 --> 00:30:58,726 Well, we weren't discussing that part of it anyway. 474 00:30:58,853 --> 00:31:02,397 I'm talking about it from a woman's point of view. 475 00:31:04,024 --> 00:31:07,527 - A woman's point of... 476 00:31:08,737 --> 00:31:12,449 A woman's point of view. Oh, God. 477 00:31:12,533 --> 00:31:15,368 I can't go to the goddamn movie with you. 478 00:31:15,411 --> 00:31:18,788 Jesus Christ Almighty. Oh, boy. 479 00:31:21,876 --> 00:31:24,461 I can... I can see it all now. 480 00:31:26,547 --> 00:31:29,757 Boy. You know, one of these days, 481 00:31:29,884 --> 00:31:32,385 you girls are gonna go, "Charge!" 482 00:31:33,304 --> 00:31:35,597 And you know somethin' funny? 483 00:31:37,558 --> 00:31:40,393 We'll all surrender, and you can have everything. 484 00:31:40,436 --> 00:31:44,063 You can have the house and the cars and the office 485 00:31:44,148 --> 00:31:46,566 and the bills and the headaches, 486 00:31:47,610 --> 00:31:50,403 and we'll sit home and laugh! 487 00:31:50,488 --> 00:31:52,906 That's what we're gonna do. 488 00:31:54,742 --> 00:31:57,452 All we ask for is peace. 489 00:31:57,578 --> 00:32:01,915 To give us our daily beating and three square meals a day and bread and water 490 00:32:01,957 --> 00:32:04,417 and we'll just sit staring at the sun, 491 00:32:04,502 --> 00:32:06,252 going blind, okay? 492 00:32:06,337 --> 00:32:09,756 Oh, I'm so sorry. Do we emasculate you? 493 00:32:09,798 --> 00:32:12,258 Poor little boy losing his virility. 494 00:32:12,301 --> 00:32:14,677 Well, I don't have it any more! 495 00:32:16,096 --> 00:32:19,599 - What happened to it, huh? - I just don't appeal to you. 496 00:32:19,642 --> 00:32:21,935 Oh, you appeal to me all right. 497 00:32:21,977 --> 00:32:24,103 When I come home, you appeal to me. 498 00:32:24,188 --> 00:32:26,105 When I'm at the office, you appeal to me. 499 00:32:26,148 --> 00:32:28,149 I am not a sex machine! 500 00:32:28,275 --> 00:32:31,277 - No, you want to go to the movies! - Because I'm bored. 501 00:32:31,362 --> 00:32:33,446 That's how you get your jollies! 502 00:32:33,489 --> 00:32:36,115 - Don't be crude! - Crude, schmude. I'm crude! 503 00:32:36,200 --> 00:32:38,201 The minute you get home, you wanna jump into bed. 504 00:32:38,285 --> 00:32:40,453 That's the general idea. 505 00:33:20,661 --> 00:33:25,415 Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Huh? 506 00:33:25,499 --> 00:33:28,001 He wanted to see time fly. 507 00:33:35,175 --> 00:33:38,845 What does Dracula do every night at midnight? 508 00:33:38,887 --> 00:33:41,347 He takes a coffin break! 509 00:33:43,392 --> 00:33:46,686 What is it that's blue and whistles 510 00:33:46,729 --> 00:33:50,690 and hangs in a delicatessen? 511 00:33:58,198 --> 00:34:02,952 Aren't you gonna say, "But a herring doesn't whistle"? 512 00:34:03,037 --> 00:34:05,580 Huh? Aren't you gonna say, "But a herring isn't blue"? 513 00:34:05,706 --> 00:34:08,583 You're not gonna say that? How can I get to the joke? 514 00:34:14,214 --> 00:34:19,886 What is it that weighs 5,000 pounds and has got a stick through it? 515 00:34:22,431 --> 00:34:24,641 A hippo-Popsicle. 516 00:34:30,397 --> 00:34:35,109 What is it that's black and white and red all over? 517 00:34:35,235 --> 00:34:38,237 - A newspaper. - No. A zebra's ass. 518 00:34:51,752 --> 00:34:54,087 You don't think I'm very funny, do ya, huh? 519 00:34:54,171 --> 00:34:56,589 Of course I think you're funny. 520 00:34:56,632 --> 00:34:59,967 Well, I could... I could be funnier, you know. 521 00:35:00,052 --> 00:35:01,678 I really could. 522 00:35:01,762 --> 00:35:05,556 - If I tried a little harder. - Maybe you're not all that funny. 523 00:35:10,062 --> 00:35:13,564 Good night. 524 00:36:18,005 --> 00:36:20,381 - Dickie, I'm sorry. - I want a divorce. 525 00:36:37,357 --> 00:36:40,526 - Did you hear what I said? - Oh, Dickie. 526 00:36:43,739 --> 00:36:45,615 I want a divorce. 527 00:36:47,534 --> 00:36:50,286 That's the only thing to do, isn't it? 528 00:36:55,584 --> 00:36:57,710 Well, why don't you laugh? 529 00:36:58,712 --> 00:37:00,505 It's funny. 530 00:37:04,510 --> 00:37:06,594 Well, what's your answer? 531 00:37:07,971 --> 00:37:09,722 Answer me! 532 00:37:52,182 --> 00:37:53,766 Hello, Jeannie? 533 00:37:55,769 --> 00:37:58,020 Hold on a minute. 534 00:37:59,439 --> 00:38:03,401 I'll send for my clothes in the morning. I'm not coming back. 535 00:38:06,822 --> 00:38:08,531 I'm on the phone. 536 00:38:15,581 --> 00:38:18,082 This is Richard Forst. Hi. 537 00:38:19,209 --> 00:38:21,460 I'd like to see you tonight. 538 00:38:22,087 --> 00:38:24,213 Well, it's very important. 539 00:38:25,007 --> 00:38:27,008 Well, how busy are you? 540 00:38:30,637 --> 00:38:33,556 Well, I could meet you at the Losers Club. 541 00:38:34,141 --> 00:38:35,683 Twenty, thirty minutes. 542 00:38:36,935 --> 00:38:39,020 Take as long as you like. 543 00:38:40,022 --> 00:38:41,480 Fine. 544 00:38:42,983 --> 00:38:45,276 I'll see you later. 545 00:39:05,047 --> 00:39:08,883 ♪ Wars have come and wars have gone 546 00:39:08,967 --> 00:39:12,219 ♪ History, it goes on and on 547 00:39:12,304 --> 00:39:15,222 ♪ Ever since this world began 548 00:39:15,307 --> 00:39:18,684 ♪ Love not war has conquered man 549 00:39:18,769 --> 00:39:22,730 ♪ Caesar tried to gain control 550 00:39:22,814 --> 00:39:25,566 ♪ Through his wealth and through his gold 551 00:39:25,651 --> 00:39:28,945 ♪ Yeah, then Cleo played her hand 552 00:39:29,029 --> 00:39:32,406 ♪ And love conquered just as planned 553 00:39:32,491 --> 00:39:35,826 ♪ Henry Windsor went to eight 554 00:39:35,911 --> 00:39:39,205 ♪ He knew how to celebrate 555 00:39:39,289 --> 00:39:42,625 ♪ But when he reached for nine and 10 556 00:39:42,709 --> 00:39:45,628 ♪ Love not war then conquered him 557 00:39:45,712 --> 00:39:49,507 ♪ Give up, you're through 558 00:39:49,591 --> 00:39:51,592 ♪ You'll never get away from it 559 00:39:51,677 --> 00:39:55,221 ♪ Why try, I'm telling you 560 00:39:56,098 --> 00:40:00,351 ♪ This lovin' stuff is here with us till the day we die 561 00:40:00,435 --> 00:40:03,479 ♪ Stonewall Jackson played it rough 562 00:40:03,563 --> 00:40:06,357 ♪ Love to him was kiddie stuff 563 00:40:06,441 --> 00:40:10,027 ♪ Yeah, but Stoney swore that he'd never fall 564 00:40:10,112 --> 00:40:12,989 ♪ But love cracked that old Stonewall 565 00:40:13,073 --> 00:40:16,784 ♪ Give up, you're through 566 00:40:16,868 --> 00:40:18,869 ♪ You'll never get away from it 567 00:40:18,954 --> 00:40:23,499 ♪ Why try, I'm telling you 568 00:40:23,583 --> 00:40:27,837 ♪ This lovin' stuff is here with us till the day we die 569 00:40:27,921 --> 00:40:30,506 ♪ We're 570 00:40:30,590 --> 00:40:34,677 ♪ Talking to you, friends 571 00:40:34,761 --> 00:40:39,265 ♪ Love's goin' to get you 572 00:40:39,349 --> 00:40:41,559 ♪ In the end 573 00:40:41,643 --> 00:40:45,021 ♪ It's all part of nature's plan 574 00:40:45,105 --> 00:40:48,441 ♪ Love will always conquer man 575 00:40:48,525 --> 00:40:51,986 ♪ Love will always conquer man 576 00:40:52,070 --> 00:40:56,574 ♪ Love ♪ 577 00:41:11,048 --> 00:41:12,923 If you think I look like silly in this outfit, 578 00:41:13,008 --> 00:41:15,176 you oughta see me in a bathing suit. 579 00:41:15,260 --> 00:41:17,386 I look like a pair of pliers with a Band-Aid on. 580 00:41:20,098 --> 00:41:22,516 I'm in such bad shape. 581 00:41:22,601 --> 00:41:25,686 - I really am. 582 00:41:26,980 --> 00:41:28,689 I got a frog in my throat. 583 00:41:28,774 --> 00:41:31,734 First meat that's passed that way in an hour. 584 00:41:36,698 --> 00:41:38,949 I just wanted you to see my suit. 585 00:41:39,034 --> 00:41:41,869 Seersucker. Sears made it, and you're lookin' at the sucker that bought it. 586 00:41:46,792 --> 00:41:49,585 On top of that, I'm so flat-footed, when I get out of the bathtub, 587 00:41:49,669 --> 00:41:52,838 somebody has to rock me back and forth to break the suction. 588 00:41:58,470 --> 00:42:01,972 But, uh, the postman came with a letter 589 00:42:02,057 --> 00:42:06,143 and told me that the Great Society was having a war on poverty. 590 00:42:06,812 --> 00:42:10,356 So, uh, I told him if that was true, I wanted to be the first to surrender. 591 00:42:37,676 --> 00:42:40,261 There once was a girl from... 592 00:42:40,345 --> 00:42:42,429 ...who played the violin. 593 00:42:42,514 --> 00:42:45,558 Uh, she tucked it under her chin. 594 00:42:45,642 --> 00:42:48,519 She plucked at her strings... 595 00:42:48,603 --> 00:42:50,104 Like angel wings. 596 00:42:50,188 --> 00:42:54,441 She plucked at her strings, among numerous things, 597 00:42:54,526 --> 00:42:55,985 and tucked it under her chin. 598 00:43:10,500 --> 00:43:12,877 - Well, Mr McCarthy. - Jim. 599 00:43:13,712 --> 00:43:15,629 Jamie McCarthy. 600 00:43:15,714 --> 00:43:18,424 - Jamie. - Oh, that's a fine name. Fine. 601 00:43:18,508 --> 00:43:21,677 - My mother used to call me Jamie. - Did she now? 602 00:43:21,761 --> 00:43:23,637 Say, how would you like to call me Mother? 603 00:43:23,722 --> 00:43:25,431 Come on, will ya? 604 00:43:25,849 --> 00:43:28,392 I'm old enough to be your father. 605 00:43:28,476 --> 00:43:30,311 Listen. Listen. 606 00:43:30,395 --> 00:43:32,271 In that case, I'd like some fatherly advice. 607 00:43:32,355 --> 00:43:34,398 - All right. - I have a terrible problem. 608 00:43:34,482 --> 00:43:36,108 What's your problem, daughter? 609 00:43:36,193 --> 00:43:38,777 - Well, this fellow, a friend... - Mmm-hmm. 610 00:43:38,862 --> 00:43:41,530 ...an Irish friend, he just called me from the bar, 611 00:43:41,615 --> 00:43:44,700 and he's in terrible trouble and wants me to come rescue him. 612 00:43:44,784 --> 00:43:47,620 - What do you think of that? - What do you think of it? 613 00:43:47,704 --> 00:43:50,331 Well, I'm asking for your advice. You're the wise one. 614 00:43:50,415 --> 00:43:53,250 Be a hero. Tell me. Come on. 615 00:43:54,920 --> 00:43:56,837 - Hey, Jackson. - Yo. 616 00:43:56,922 --> 00:43:59,006 ...Hey, Jackson. 617 00:44:02,219 --> 00:44:05,554 Remember the time we went to New Orleans on a bet? 618 00:44:06,765 --> 00:44:08,349 Yes, sir, I do. 619 00:44:09,309 --> 00:44:12,519 We stayed up all night screaming at the top of our lungs. 620 00:44:12,604 --> 00:44:14,521 We had a... 621 00:44:14,606 --> 00:44:16,440 We had a... My nose itches. 622 00:44:16,524 --> 00:44:18,400 - We had a... - Going to kiss a fool? 623 00:44:18,485 --> 00:44:20,152 Yeah, I know. 624 00:44:21,655 --> 00:44:24,949 We had a couple bimbos. No, actually, they were very nice girls. 625 00:44:25,492 --> 00:44:28,202 - They reminded me a lot of you two. - Oh. 626 00:44:28,286 --> 00:44:30,829 But they knew more dirty limericks than you could shake a stick at. 627 00:44:30,914 --> 00:44:31,997 How nice. 628 00:44:32,082 --> 00:44:34,750 Well, I knew a guy who used to make them up and sell them. 629 00:44:34,834 --> 00:44:37,544 Really? He must have been an ex-convict. 630 00:44:37,629 --> 00:44:40,172 - That's right. Don't look so wide-eyed. - I'm not wide-eyed. 631 00:44:40,257 --> 00:44:42,424 Do you realise that ex-convicts and jailbirds 632 00:44:42,509 --> 00:44:44,385 are the ones that write all the limericks? 633 00:44:44,469 --> 00:44:45,970 Not all of them. 634 00:44:46,054 --> 00:44:48,430 Oh, don't argue with Mr McCarthy, miss. 635 00:44:48,515 --> 00:44:51,934 Jimmy Arno, he wrote a couple that were really funny. Didn't he, Jeannie? 636 00:44:52,018 --> 00:44:53,560 - That's right. He did. - Jimmy Arno? 637 00:44:53,645 --> 00:44:57,356 - Mmm-hmm. - Jimmy Arno? Not the Jimmy Arno. 638 00:44:57,440 --> 00:44:59,441 - Do you know him? - Never heard of him. 639 00:45:09,035 --> 00:45:11,078 Aw, come on, now. 640 00:45:11,162 --> 00:45:13,497 What the hell do we care about two whores? 641 00:45:13,581 --> 00:45:15,791 - You better watch... - Wait a minute! 642 00:45:15,875 --> 00:45:18,252 - Two whores! - I don't want you around! 643 00:45:18,336 --> 00:45:19,586 Come on. Come on. 644 00:45:19,671 --> 00:45:21,672 - You don't want us around? - That's right. 645 00:45:21,756 --> 00:45:24,800 Look who's saying she doesn't want us around! 646 00:45:24,884 --> 00:45:29,013 - You're coming on awfully strong. - Just who in the hell are you, huh? 647 00:45:29,097 --> 00:45:31,015 Just who in the hell are you? 648 00:45:31,099 --> 00:45:33,225 Wait a minute. Take it easy. What's the matter with you? 649 00:45:33,310 --> 00:45:35,060 Why be so violent? 650 00:45:35,770 --> 00:45:39,690 Take it easy. Just relax. Wait a minute, Jeannie. Wait, Jeannie. 651 00:45:53,580 --> 00:45:55,539 I'm sorry. 652 00:45:57,167 --> 00:45:59,168 Can I have a cigarette? 653 00:46:02,130 --> 00:46:03,672 Let me close this door. 654 00:46:06,843 --> 00:46:09,386 All right. I won't close the door. 655 00:46:14,768 --> 00:46:16,643 Ah, boy, what a life! 656 00:46:19,773 --> 00:46:23,400 Ah, what's the matter, Jeannie? Don't you like me? Hmm? 657 00:46:24,444 --> 00:46:26,904 Why not? Come on. I can take criticism. 658 00:46:27,822 --> 00:46:30,616 Hmm? What's the matter with me? 659 00:46:30,700 --> 00:46:33,619 You don't want me to be crude? All right, I won't be crude. 660 00:46:37,123 --> 00:46:39,708 Jeannie... Jeannie, I'm a nice guy. 661 00:46:40,502 --> 00:46:42,878 Would you think that I weigh 190 pounds? Huh? 662 00:46:45,465 --> 00:46:46,924 You're married. 663 00:46:47,717 --> 00:46:49,843 Oh, Jeannie, am I married. 664 00:46:51,012 --> 00:46:52,596 Yeah, I'm married. 665 00:46:53,348 --> 00:46:55,849 I got a son almost as old as you. 666 00:46:56,935 --> 00:46:58,811 He thinks he's a grown man. 667 00:46:58,895 --> 00:47:00,687 He goes to college. 668 00:47:01,231 --> 00:47:04,358 I wanted him to go to one of those Midwestern schools and play football, 669 00:47:04,442 --> 00:47:05,901 but his mother said, "No. No football". 670 00:47:05,985 --> 00:47:09,154 So he said, "All right. What the hell. Okay, no football". 671 00:47:09,239 --> 00:47:11,657 So instead he goes to Dartmouth. 672 00:47:12,158 --> 00:47:13,659 Goes out for tennis instead. 673 00:47:13,743 --> 00:47:16,703 All day long he walks around in tennis shoes. 674 00:47:16,788 --> 00:47:18,622 What kind of a thing is that for a grown boy 675 00:47:18,706 --> 00:47:21,458 to walk around in tennis shoes all day long? 676 00:47:21,543 --> 00:47:23,210 What the hell. He's my son. 677 00:47:23,294 --> 00:47:26,547 Even if he wants to nance around, I say, "So what?" 678 00:47:26,631 --> 00:47:29,716 Everybody's gotta lead their own life, right? 679 00:47:30,927 --> 00:47:33,720 So, he goes out for swimming and track, 680 00:47:36,558 --> 00:47:38,559 and wears tennis shoes. 681 00:47:42,814 --> 00:47:47,568 Jeannie, do you know what it is to be a promo man in a firm like mine, huh? 682 00:47:47,902 --> 00:47:49,403 I'll tell ya. 683 00:47:50,071 --> 00:47:52,489 You meet more millionaires and more presidents 684 00:47:52,574 --> 00:47:54,741 than you dream could exist. 685 00:47:56,619 --> 00:47:58,537 And that seems like a big thing to you, huh? 686 00:48:02,000 --> 00:48:04,918 So, what have I got after all those years? 687 00:48:05,670 --> 00:48:08,755 A big house, a kooky wife and a kid who wears sneakers. 688 00:48:33,448 --> 00:48:37,075 Hey, Jeannie baby! Hey. You're all right, Jeannie baby! 689 00:48:39,370 --> 00:48:41,330 Whoo! 690 00:48:41,414 --> 00:48:43,916 Hey. Turn out these lights, will ya? 691 00:48:44,000 --> 00:48:46,543 Looks like an office in here. 692 00:48:46,628 --> 00:48:48,629 How do you expect to make out with all these lights on? 693 00:48:48,713 --> 00:48:51,173 What do you say, Slick? 694 00:48:57,805 --> 00:49:00,557 Hey. You know what? You've got quite a tummy. 695 00:49:00,642 --> 00:49:02,434 You've got... Hasn't he got a... Huh? 696 00:49:02,519 --> 00:49:04,603 Hey, how about a little kiss for my buddy? 697 00:49:04,687 --> 00:49:06,396 How about a... Ooh! 698 00:49:08,983 --> 00:49:11,193 Stay. Have a good time. Stella, lock up when you go. 699 00:49:11,277 --> 00:49:12,861 Wait a minute. Where you goin'? Hold on! 700 00:49:12,946 --> 00:49:15,572 - Leave me alone. - Will you leave her alone! 701 00:49:15,657 --> 00:49:17,533 Just get out of here! 702 00:49:27,043 --> 00:49:29,962 Now, what are you makin' a scene for? Huh? 703 00:49:31,464 --> 00:49:33,715 - Come on. Give me a break. - Give you a break? 704 00:49:33,800 --> 00:49:36,552 Why? You think you deserve a break? 705 00:49:38,179 --> 00:49:41,431 - Look, I met this guy. - You met this guy. So? 706 00:49:41,516 --> 00:49:44,142 - Leave her alone. - Ah, shut up! Will you sit down? 707 00:49:44,227 --> 00:49:47,771 So you met this guy. Go ahead. So you met this guy. What about him? 708 00:49:47,855 --> 00:49:49,690 You in love with this guy? You hate this guy? 709 00:49:49,774 --> 00:49:51,358 - You went to college with this guy? - No. 710 00:49:52,360 --> 00:49:54,695 Come on. Don't do this. Don't. 711 00:49:57,907 --> 00:49:59,950 All right. Come on, will ya? 712 00:50:00,034 --> 00:50:01,702 Cut it out. 713 00:50:10,211 --> 00:50:12,004 You son of a bitch! 714 00:50:17,176 --> 00:50:20,304 There's this joke about the Siamese twins. 715 00:50:20,346 --> 00:50:21,847 What? 716 00:50:21,931 --> 00:50:25,100 Have you ever heard that old belly-twister, uh, 717 00:50:26,019 --> 00:50:28,020 about the Siamese twins? 718 00:50:28,146 --> 00:50:29,855 - No. 719 00:50:30,607 --> 00:50:33,442 One is named June and the other July. 720 00:50:33,526 --> 00:50:36,278 - Is that a real one? - Oh, no, no, no. 721 00:50:36,362 --> 00:50:38,488 Let me light that for you. 722 00:50:39,949 --> 00:50:41,366 Thank you. 723 00:50:42,035 --> 00:50:43,994 Oh, boy, women. 724 00:50:44,037 --> 00:50:46,955 If I live to be a million, I'll never understand 'em. 725 00:50:47,040 --> 00:50:48,498 Crazy broads. 726 00:50:48,541 --> 00:50:51,168 Aw, shoot, now. 727 00:50:51,210 --> 00:50:52,878 Come on over here, huh? 728 00:50:53,379 --> 00:50:55,797 Come on. Will ya? 729 00:50:55,882 --> 00:50:57,466 Come on. 730 00:50:58,134 --> 00:51:00,385 Come on, you son of a gun. 731 00:51:00,470 --> 00:51:03,472 Come on, now. Come on. 732 00:51:03,556 --> 00:51:05,682 Come on. Ooh, you. 733 00:51:06,476 --> 00:51:08,894 Come on! 734 00:51:09,020 --> 00:51:10,479 You know you're nuts? 735 00:51:10,563 --> 00:51:13,565 - You know that, don't you? 736 00:51:30,166 --> 00:51:32,417 No, wait a minute. Wait a minute. Don't go away. 737 00:51:32,543 --> 00:51:34,878 Come on in. Join the party. 738 00:51:34,921 --> 00:51:37,214 There's been a lot of controversy over you tonight. 739 00:51:37,256 --> 00:51:39,424 Oh, no, there hasn't been any controversy. 740 00:51:39,509 --> 00:51:40,926 Sure there has. 741 00:51:41,052 --> 00:51:43,261 - You're the one in the bar, right? - That's right. 742 00:51:43,388 --> 00:51:45,764 - Been waitin' a couple of hours? - That's right. 743 00:51:45,890 --> 00:51:47,599 Well, then, come on, take your coat off. 744 00:51:47,684 --> 00:51:49,184 - Relax, join the party. - Hey, stop that. 745 00:51:49,268 --> 00:51:50,769 Okay. Come on. Sit down. Sit down. 746 00:51:50,853 --> 00:51:53,522 We'll just have a couple drinks, then we'll get out of here, huh? 747 00:51:53,606 --> 00:51:55,440 You don't mind, do ya? 748 00:51:55,525 --> 00:51:58,902 - What's your name, by the way? - Richard. 749 00:51:58,945 --> 00:52:02,030 Well, Richard, Richard. Atta boy. That's a nice name, Richard. 750 00:52:02,115 --> 00:52:06,451 Isn't that a nice name, Jackson? Hey, Richard. Richard. Richard! 751 00:52:06,577 --> 00:52:08,745 I'm talkin' to you, boy. Come on. Pay attention. Let's go. 752 00:52:08,788 --> 00:52:12,124 I'm Jim, that's Joe and, uh, Stella I suppose you know. 753 00:52:12,375 --> 00:52:15,127 Hey, what do you do, Richard? 754 00:52:15,795 --> 00:52:17,421 I'm a businessman. 755 00:52:17,463 --> 00:52:19,965 - Insurance, huh? - That's right. 756 00:52:21,300 --> 00:52:23,802 At least he's not a fag, huh, Jeannie? 757 00:52:25,805 --> 00:52:28,140 - Well, maybe I am. 758 00:52:28,224 --> 00:52:30,642 The boy Richard is all right. Your friend Richard... 759 00:52:30,727 --> 00:52:33,395 He's got spirit, hasn't he, Jim? 760 00:52:33,479 --> 00:52:35,313 Listen, now that we're through with basic training, 761 00:52:35,398 --> 00:52:38,817 can we knock off the grade school theatrics? Jeannie, I... 762 00:52:38,901 --> 00:52:42,154 ♪ I used to work in Chicago in a department store 763 00:52:42,238 --> 00:52:45,824 ♪ I used to work in Chicago I do but I don't any more 764 00:52:45,908 --> 00:52:49,119 ♪ A lady came in, she asked for a whoop What kind of whoop said I 765 00:52:49,495 --> 00:52:53,331 ♪ Whoop she said, whoop I said I did but I don't any more ♪ 766 00:52:55,835 --> 00:52:58,420 Richard, you don't know a goddamn thing about women, do ya? 767 00:52:58,504 --> 00:53:01,173 You know that women are basically all whores? Did you know that? 768 00:53:05,178 --> 00:53:06,636 I'm sorry. 769 00:53:09,515 --> 00:53:11,600 Excuse me, Jeannie. 770 00:53:15,354 --> 00:53:17,355 You're married, right? Wouldn't you say he's married, Jackson? 771 00:53:17,440 --> 00:53:19,608 - Oh, yeah, he's married. - Very much so. 772 00:53:19,692 --> 00:53:21,443 Forty-eight, unhappy as hell. 773 00:53:21,527 --> 00:53:25,363 Uh-huh. Separated, out for a good time. Out for a good time! 774 00:53:25,490 --> 00:53:28,492 Lookin' for a little momentary relationship. 775 00:53:30,286 --> 00:53:32,370 Who the hell are you guys? 776 00:53:34,290 --> 00:53:36,541 Oh, didn't we tell ya, Richard? We're the police. 777 00:53:36,626 --> 00:53:39,044 - Oh, yeah, we're the vice squad. - Vice squad! 778 00:53:39,128 --> 00:53:41,338 They're not. They're just kidding. 779 00:53:41,380 --> 00:53:46,968 So, look, you run along home, sonny boy, and play with your own. 780 00:53:48,054 --> 00:53:52,140 Joe is Joe Jackson. Jim is Jim McCarthy. 781 00:53:52,225 --> 00:53:54,810 He's vice president of Metal... 782 00:53:54,894 --> 00:53:59,231 Industries of the Pacific West Coast and affiliate companies. 783 00:53:59,357 --> 00:54:00,816 Jackson's supposed to mix the drinks, right? 784 00:54:00,900 --> 00:54:02,734 - Right. - Jackson. 785 00:54:02,860 --> 00:54:05,403 - Get me a double-double scotch. - Straight? 786 00:54:05,488 --> 00:54:08,657 - No soda and no ice. - No soda, no ice. 787 00:54:08,741 --> 00:54:11,743 Neat, clean, straight down the line, huh? 788 00:54:14,205 --> 00:54:15,747 Dickie, why don't you go? 789 00:54:18,543 --> 00:54:20,585 What do I do now? 790 00:54:20,670 --> 00:54:22,379 Take my coat off? 791 00:54:22,755 --> 00:54:26,258 What you want me to do? Take my coat off? All right. 792 00:54:27,426 --> 00:54:29,511 - All right. Step outside. - No. 793 00:54:29,595 --> 00:54:30,679 What do you mean, "No"? 794 00:54:30,763 --> 00:54:32,597 If you think I'm gonna fight in the dark, you're crazy. 795 00:54:32,723 --> 00:54:34,599 - We can't fight in Miss Rapp's house. - Why not? 796 00:54:34,684 --> 00:54:37,435 Why not? Look, McCarthy, why don't you just get out of here? 797 00:54:37,562 --> 00:54:39,187 Nobody wants you around. 798 00:54:39,272 --> 00:54:41,356 - Oh, nobody wants me around, huh? - Right. 799 00:54:41,440 --> 00:54:44,568 A little while ago, you almost fainted when I offered you 200 bucks. 800 00:54:44,610 --> 00:54:46,194 - Oh! - Two hundred bucks. Who needs ya! 801 00:54:46,279 --> 00:54:47,737 You're not even pretty! 802 00:54:47,780 --> 00:54:50,448 - I hope he knocks you on your fat prat! - Take it easy, Jeannie. 803 00:54:50,575 --> 00:54:52,534 - You wanna fight or not? - You wanna go through with it? 804 00:54:52,618 --> 00:54:54,452 What are you, yellow? 805 00:54:59,417 --> 00:55:01,793 Oh, now you did it! Now you did it! 806 00:55:01,919 --> 00:55:04,629 Now your head's gonna leave your body. 807 00:55:04,755 --> 00:55:07,132 - Hey, do you need any help, boss? - No! 808 00:55:07,216 --> 00:55:09,593 No! No, I don't need any help! 809 00:55:09,635 --> 00:55:13,221 No! 810 00:55:20,897 --> 00:55:23,481 Ooh, you wanna fight dirty, eh? 811 00:55:23,566 --> 00:55:26,234 - Hey, hey, hey. - I'll kill him. Oh, my knee! 812 00:55:26,319 --> 00:55:29,154 My knee. I'll kill ya. Ooh, my knee, my knee! 813 00:55:29,238 --> 00:55:32,490 - You shouldn't have done it so long. - I'll kill him! I'll kill him! 814 00:55:32,575 --> 00:55:35,660 - All right. Come on. - Get out of my way! 815 00:55:36,913 --> 00:55:40,165 Come on. Will you go on? Come on, boy. 816 00:55:40,291 --> 00:55:43,501 I'll kill him. Oh, my knee, my knee. Take it easy, will ya? 817 00:55:43,628 --> 00:55:46,671 Ow! God! I'll kill that bum. 818 00:55:46,797 --> 00:55:48,673 I'll take him apart and put him together again! 819 00:55:48,799 --> 00:55:50,258 Yes, sir. Look, just a minute. 820 00:55:50,343 --> 00:55:52,010 For crying out loud, I know you'll kill him. 821 00:55:54,180 --> 00:55:57,307 What's the matter with you? Listen, I've taken guys twice his size. 822 00:55:57,350 --> 00:55:58,934 I'll bet you have. 823 00:55:59,018 --> 00:56:01,269 I had a 300-pound wrestler one time, gave me some gaff. 824 00:56:01,354 --> 00:56:04,439 I picked him up over my head, threw him to the ground. I broke his collarbone! 825 00:56:04,982 --> 00:56:07,025 You son of a gun. 826 00:56:11,364 --> 00:56:13,698 - You don't believe me, huh? - Oh, sure I do. 827 00:56:20,539 --> 00:56:23,041 - How did we get into this? - How did we get into it? 828 00:56:23,125 --> 00:56:24,960 How the hell do we get out of it? 829 00:56:29,006 --> 00:56:30,966 You son of a... 830 00:56:34,887 --> 00:56:37,472 Ah, shoot. You look fine. 831 00:56:37,556 --> 00:56:40,225 Now, take it easy, will ya? 832 00:56:41,227 --> 00:56:44,187 Okay. But one word out of him, and I'll... 833 00:56:46,065 --> 00:56:47,983 You son of a gun! 834 00:56:49,652 --> 00:56:51,903 All right. Come on. Let's go. 835 00:56:52,321 --> 00:56:55,907 I said, "I used to do a little bit of, uh... 836 00:56:56,033 --> 00:56:58,201 "A little bit of fighting." 837 00:57:20,433 --> 00:57:23,977 I understand you're a pretty big businessman. Is that right, Jim? 838 00:57:24,103 --> 00:57:25,562 Yeah, that's right. 839 00:57:25,604 --> 00:57:28,231 Stella tells me you're in advertising and promotion. 840 00:57:28,274 --> 00:57:29,774 Yeah, that's my title. 841 00:57:29,817 --> 00:57:33,486 They think I'm worth $150,000 a year plus expenses for it. 842 00:57:33,612 --> 00:57:36,156 Ah. Who's your biggest account? 843 00:57:37,324 --> 00:57:39,284 He doesn't believe me. 844 00:57:39,326 --> 00:57:41,786 - Hey, look. Here's a card. - I'm not interested. 845 00:57:41,829 --> 00:57:45,957 - No, he's not interested in that. - You buy, uh, brass and aluminium? 846 00:57:46,000 --> 00:57:49,627 Yep. I buy brass and aluminium. 847 00:57:49,754 --> 00:57:52,589 - Is that right? - That's right. Case closed. 848 00:57:52,631 --> 00:57:55,467 Hey. Hey, now. Look, you son of a gun. 849 00:57:55,593 --> 00:57:57,135 You told me in the kitchen. 850 00:57:59,638 --> 00:58:01,306 Okay. 851 00:58:07,855 --> 00:58:12,817 Hey, uh, you ever hear the one about the fag motorcycle driver? 852 00:58:12,943 --> 00:58:15,028 Yeah, I heard that. 853 00:58:15,654 --> 00:58:19,449 Well, how about the one about the little Jewish agent who... 854 00:58:19,492 --> 00:58:21,826 "Not necessarily." I heard that one, too. 855 00:58:21,952 --> 00:58:24,496 Hey, why don't you tell him about that one about "probably"... 856 00:58:24,538 --> 00:58:26,998 Oh, come on, now. You gave the punch line away. 857 00:58:27,041 --> 00:58:29,459 - What's the matter with you? - I heard that one. 858 00:58:29,502 --> 00:58:31,336 - How about the goose one? - The goose one? 859 00:58:31,462 --> 00:58:35,799 Yeah. The goose that goes down the subway and gets peopled to death. 860 00:58:36,467 --> 00:58:39,385 The goose that goes down the subway and gets peopled to death. 861 00:58:39,512 --> 00:58:43,515 Oh, you're too much. Oh, boy! 862 00:58:43,557 --> 00:58:45,475 Hey, did you hear the one about 863 00:58:45,518 --> 00:58:47,519 the little Jewish carpenter who was so mean... 864 00:58:47,645 --> 00:58:49,729 Once a schmuck, always a schmuck. 865 00:58:51,982 --> 00:58:53,900 That's not the ending I heard. 866 00:58:54,026 --> 00:58:56,820 That joke's old enough to have a beard. 867 00:58:58,906 --> 00:59:00,824 You're really uncanny. 868 00:59:00,866 --> 00:59:02,659 Oh, boy. 869 00:59:02,701 --> 00:59:06,204 Hey, you said you were in business. What kind, uh... 870 00:59:06,247 --> 00:59:07,831 He said he was in insurance business. 871 00:59:07,873 --> 00:59:10,083 Well, I'm in finance. That's a form of insurance. 872 00:59:10,209 --> 00:59:11,876 - Oh, really? - Yes. 873 00:59:11,919 --> 00:59:14,671 - What do you do there? - I'm chairman of the board. 874 00:59:14,713 --> 00:59:17,757 - We have one corporation. - Yeah? What's the firm? 875 00:59:17,883 --> 00:59:20,760 - Investment Finance. - That's a pretty big outfit. 876 00:59:20,886 --> 00:59:24,264 - Yeah. - Hey, uh, do you know Stewie Ray? 877 00:59:25,182 --> 00:59:28,393 - He's not kidding. - I'm not making it up. Stewie Ray. 878 00:59:28,519 --> 00:59:30,228 - Works for me. - No kidding? Really? 879 00:59:30,354 --> 00:59:33,189 - Yeah. - He's a nice guy. Hell of a nice guy. 880 00:59:33,232 --> 00:59:35,733 - You do business with him? - Ah, we talk once in a while. 881 00:59:35,860 --> 00:59:38,570 A firm like mine has to have a good credit rate. We talk. 882 00:59:38,696 --> 00:59:40,530 - That's very good. - Yeah. 883 00:59:40,573 --> 00:59:43,908 Enough of business already. I'm getting hungry. 884 00:59:43,951 --> 00:59:46,286 You been to Chicago, Dick? 885 00:59:46,412 --> 00:59:49,539 - Not often. - There he goes. He's... 886 00:59:49,582 --> 00:59:52,584 He's uncanny with this phraseology, you know that? 887 00:59:52,626 --> 00:59:54,419 No wonder you're chairman of the board. 888 00:59:54,461 --> 00:59:56,421 Jeannie, you know what chairman of the board is? 889 00:59:56,922 --> 01:00:00,884 He's the man. He's a killer. Boy, he's got all the weight. 890 01:00:00,926 --> 01:00:03,553 Did you ever tell Jean about the board of directors' meeting? 891 01:00:03,596 --> 01:00:06,389 I was just about to, but I didn't get the chance somehow. 892 01:00:09,894 --> 01:00:12,562 There he goes with that uncanny phraseology of his again. 893 01:00:12,605 --> 01:00:16,316 Boy, I'll bet you're a real murderer behind that big desk of yours. 894 01:00:16,442 --> 01:00:18,776 Well, I don't have a big desk. 895 01:00:19,778 --> 01:00:23,448 You know, you're all right. You're all right. You know... 896 01:00:23,490 --> 01:00:25,992 I've been a... I've been a road man all my life. 897 01:00:26,118 --> 01:00:28,995 I've been in every toilet in 50 states. 898 01:00:29,121 --> 01:00:32,582 I sort of prefer it that way. Hey, do you know the... 899 01:00:37,296 --> 01:00:41,132 Hey, you know what? Before they had planes, they had trains. 900 01:00:41,175 --> 01:00:43,927 Now they got these planes that fly like that. 901 01:00:43,969 --> 01:00:47,305 Four and a half hours from New York to Los Angeles. 902 01:00:47,431 --> 01:00:48,848 Four and a half hours. You believe that? 903 01:00:50,434 --> 01:00:52,769 - I don't wanna talk about business. - Huh? 904 01:00:52,811 --> 01:00:56,147 I don't wanna either. I'd rather play a game of billiards. 905 01:00:56,190 --> 01:00:57,649 Do you play billiards? 906 01:00:57,775 --> 01:01:01,611 I can tell by your expression you don't. I'll bet you're a golf man, right? 907 01:01:01,654 --> 01:01:05,448 - Tennis. - Tennis. My kid plays tennis, too. 908 01:01:05,491 --> 01:01:07,325 Is that right? Tennis? No kidding. 909 01:01:07,368 --> 01:01:09,661 I got a friend of mine who bought Don Budge's house. 910 01:01:09,703 --> 01:01:13,665 I know those guys. You know, Segura, Kramer, uh, Gonzales. 911 01:01:13,791 --> 01:01:15,333 I only play for myself. 912 01:01:15,459 --> 01:01:17,835 Sure. Go down, play a few sets, work off the gut. 913 01:01:17,962 --> 01:01:21,047 That'll keep your mind... Uh, body up with your mind. 914 01:01:21,173 --> 01:01:22,632 I got a kid who plays, too. 915 01:01:22,675 --> 01:01:24,842 He's a hell of a nice kid. Smart as a whip, too. 916 01:01:24,969 --> 01:01:28,346 - Nothing like his old man. - Why you S.O.B. 917 01:01:29,139 --> 01:01:32,183 - You're right. I am an S.O.B. - You are. 918 01:01:32,226 --> 01:01:36,354 Oh, boy. This kid's fantastic. He runs! He runs! 919 01:01:36,397 --> 01:01:40,692 And he runs for hours and hours. Summer, winter, snowing, rain. 920 01:01:40,818 --> 01:01:43,695 He doesn't care. He swims in any kind of weather. 921 01:01:43,737 --> 01:01:46,990 Oh, boy. I'm tellin' ya, I don't know where these kids get the energy. 922 01:01:47,032 --> 01:01:48,533 You ever see these Ivy League kids? 923 01:01:48,575 --> 01:01:51,202 They all look alike, skinny shoulders, sneakers. 924 01:01:51,704 --> 01:01:53,329 I don't know what the hell you're talking about. 925 01:01:57,751 --> 01:01:59,544 Oh, I don't know either. 926 01:01:59,670 --> 01:02:01,754 - Hey. Hey. - What? 927 01:02:02,506 --> 01:02:07,176 I think that Dickie would like to be alone with the young lady. 928 01:02:10,222 --> 01:02:13,224 Oh, sure. Who wouldn't? I would, too. You kidding? 929 01:02:13,350 --> 01:02:15,268 A couple of visiting firemen come in, cramp your style, 930 01:02:15,394 --> 01:02:17,228 step all over your feet, huh? 931 01:02:17,354 --> 01:02:19,897 Listen, McCarthy, if you don't get out of here, 932 01:02:19,940 --> 01:02:22,275 I'm gonna call the vice squad. 933 01:02:22,401 --> 01:02:26,362 - Hey, remember. We're the vice squad! - You're the vice squad! 934 01:02:26,572 --> 01:02:29,782 Okay. Hey, Stella, why don't you give that girl... What's her name? 935 01:02:30,200 --> 01:02:31,784 - Marta. - Marta. Why don't you give her a call? 936 01:02:31,910 --> 01:02:34,370 Now, come on, sweetheart? All right? Then we can get out of here. Okay? 937 01:02:35,205 --> 01:02:38,624 Oh, gee, Dick, how did we get into this situation anyway? 938 01:02:38,751 --> 01:02:41,419 I'm sorry. It's ridiculous, isn't it? 939 01:02:41,962 --> 01:02:43,588 Why don't I give you a call Monday? 940 01:02:43,714 --> 01:02:46,924 Maybe we can have lunch or, uh, maybe just talk on the phone, all right? 941 01:02:46,967 --> 01:02:50,720 - That's a very good idea. - Good. Okay. Stewie Ray. 942 01:02:52,806 --> 01:02:55,391 Ah. Oh, boy. 943 01:02:55,642 --> 01:02:57,769 Ah, Stewie Ray. Hey, come on. 944 01:02:57,895 --> 01:03:00,063 Oh, Jeannie, I'll call you the next time I get in town. 945 01:03:00,105 --> 01:03:02,065 Yes, yes, you do that. 946 01:03:02,107 --> 01:03:04,567 Come on, Stella. Let's go. Shake it up! 947 01:03:04,610 --> 01:03:06,611 - It's been a real pleasure. - Nice meeting you. 948 01:03:06,653 --> 01:03:08,404 - Richard, old boy. - Jim. 949 01:03:08,447 --> 01:03:10,573 - Nice meeting you. - Right. 950 01:03:11,158 --> 01:03:14,577 - Sorry about what happened. - Well, that's the way it goes. 951 01:03:14,620 --> 01:03:16,662 - Night. - Joey. 952 01:03:17,748 --> 01:03:19,248 It's really been a pleasure. 953 01:03:19,291 --> 01:03:22,960 - You're gonna get a raise, Joey. - I hope so. 954 01:03:23,003 --> 01:03:25,838 Come on, Stella, step it up, will ya? Let's go. Let's go. Come on. 955 01:03:25,964 --> 01:03:28,466 I'm glad she's not too tired. I gotta get my coat. Wait. 956 01:03:28,592 --> 01:03:30,468 Come on. Let's go. Let's go. 957 01:03:30,511 --> 01:03:33,304 - Wait till I get... - It's cold outside. 958 01:03:33,347 --> 01:03:34,847 - Come on. - Good night, Jeannie. 959 01:03:34,973 --> 01:03:36,641 Thanks. See you later. 960 01:03:36,725 --> 01:03:39,560 Good night again. Good night, Miss Rapp. 961 01:03:39,645 --> 01:03:41,979 Dickie, Stewie Ray, huh? 962 01:03:42,856 --> 01:03:44,857 Stewie Ray! 963 01:03:48,320 --> 01:03:51,322 - I thought they'd never leave. 964 01:03:52,699 --> 01:03:54,200 "Stewie Ray." 965 01:03:55,702 --> 01:03:58,663 - "You're a golf man, right, Richard?" - Tennis. 966 01:04:01,333 --> 01:04:03,042 I never laughed so hard. 967 01:04:03,168 --> 01:04:05,253 I was pretty good, wasn't I? 968 01:04:05,337 --> 01:04:08,005 - My hero. - Hi, ho, Silver! 969 01:04:11,260 --> 01:04:13,678 White horse hero. You get it? 970 01:04:13,762 --> 01:04:15,847 Yeah, I get it. 971 01:04:24,398 --> 01:04:26,607 Ah, Dickie, Dickie, Dickie. 972 01:04:26,692 --> 01:04:29,193 I like you, you know. I really do like ya. 973 01:04:29,236 --> 01:04:31,195 - Well, don't get serious. - I'm not. 974 01:04:31,280 --> 01:04:33,197 - Well, don't. - I wasn't. 975 01:04:33,240 --> 01:04:35,199 Definition of "seriousness". 976 01:04:35,284 --> 01:04:38,786 Noun. Grave or solemn of disposition. 977 01:04:39,872 --> 01:04:43,416 Yeah, well, I wasn't getting serious. I'm your friend. 978 01:04:44,251 --> 01:04:46,419 Well, you know how I feel about friendship. 979 01:04:46,545 --> 01:04:49,213 - No. How do you feel? - Definition of "friendship". 980 01:04:49,256 --> 01:04:52,258 Noun. One who's attached to another 981 01:04:53,260 --> 01:04:55,386 because of their personal regard. 982 01:04:55,471 --> 01:04:58,055 Companion, a comrade, a chum, 983 01:04:58,765 --> 01:05:01,434 and someone who doesn't get serious. 984 01:05:01,560 --> 01:05:04,061 - Friends never get serious? - Never. 985 01:05:04,813 --> 01:05:07,273 - Can a friend ask a question? - No. And shut up. 986 01:05:09,401 --> 01:05:11,569 Let's do Peter Piper picked a pickle... Peck a... 987 01:05:11,612 --> 01:05:14,780 - Ah, Dickie, I'm exhausted. - You can't be exhausted. 988 01:05:14,907 --> 01:05:16,741 Peter Piper picked a peck of peckled... 989 01:05:16,783 --> 01:05:18,075 Peter Piper picked a peck of... 990 01:05:18,118 --> 01:05:20,995 Hey, Dickie, why did you want to see me? 991 01:05:22,122 --> 01:05:24,332 I wanted to play with you. 992 01:05:24,416 --> 01:05:26,292 All right. Then what? 993 01:05:27,085 --> 01:05:29,086 Oh, we'd play, have a few laughs, 994 01:05:29,171 --> 01:05:30,963 see what developed. 995 01:05:31,340 --> 01:05:33,424 - I like you. - You like me. 996 01:05:33,842 --> 01:05:36,511 - I like you. - All right, you like me. 997 01:05:36,595 --> 01:05:40,431 - That's right. I like you. - Oh, Dickie, what's the matter? 998 01:05:42,267 --> 01:05:44,602 You think I'm one of those gross businessmen? 999 01:05:44,645 --> 01:05:46,604 You think I have a secretary that picks up the phone 1000 01:05:46,647 --> 01:05:48,856 and gets me whatever I want? 1001 01:05:48,941 --> 01:05:51,484 Jeannie, I buried eight relatives in the past six years. 1002 01:05:51,610 --> 01:05:54,195 There's nobody left but me. I'm just a mild success 1003 01:05:54,279 --> 01:05:56,614 in a dull profession, and I wanna start over again. 1004 01:05:56,657 --> 01:05:58,449 And I've got a bad kidney! 1005 01:06:02,329 --> 01:06:03,788 So? 1006 01:06:14,216 --> 01:06:16,300 Come on and take a bath. 1007 01:06:18,178 --> 01:06:20,012 I don't want a bath! 1008 01:06:23,642 --> 01:06:29,522 No bath? 1009 01:06:29,648 --> 01:06:31,315 No bath. 1010 01:06:31,358 --> 01:06:33,484 People drown in bathtubs. 1011 01:06:52,212 --> 01:06:54,171 No hard feelings? 1012 01:06:54,214 --> 01:06:56,757 You're aces high with me, Charlie. 1013 01:06:57,426 --> 01:07:00,511 ♪ I dream of Jeannie 1014 01:07:00,596 --> 01:07:03,889 ♪ With the light brown hair 1015 01:07:04,016 --> 01:07:08,561 ♪ Borne like a vapour on the summer air 1016 01:07:25,370 --> 01:07:27,622 You know, you're a very strange man. 1017 01:07:27,706 --> 01:07:31,626 - Well, you want me to leave, I'll leave. - But not sensitive. 1018 01:07:31,710 --> 01:07:34,879 And another thing, you don't make me insecure. 1019 01:07:35,714 --> 01:07:38,382 - That's not one of my problems. - Good. 1020 01:07:40,302 --> 01:07:41,761 Alrighty. 1021 01:07:42,971 --> 01:07:44,430 Now. 1022 01:07:45,223 --> 01:07:48,392 Okay, give me a foot. 1023 01:07:50,395 --> 01:07:52,229 ...Those are new socks. 1024 01:07:53,231 --> 01:07:54,649 Yeah? Good. 1025 01:07:55,275 --> 01:07:58,235 - Yeah, new socks make me insecure. 1026 01:07:59,988 --> 01:08:01,906 Clothes make the man. 1027 01:08:04,242 --> 01:08:06,619 - What does that do? - Makes your feet smell good. 1028 01:08:06,745 --> 01:08:08,579 Oh, that's fine. 1029 01:08:09,122 --> 01:08:11,832 Then I'm gonna dry them off, I'm gonna powder them down, 1030 01:08:11,917 --> 01:08:13,834 and then I'm gonna rub 'em till warm. 1031 01:08:13,919 --> 01:08:16,253 ♪ Oh, dem bones, dem bones They walk all over 1032 01:08:16,338 --> 01:08:17,630 ♪ Dem bones, dem bones ♪ Dem bones, dem bones 1033 01:08:17,756 --> 01:08:18,839 ♪ They walk all over ♪ Dry bones 1034 01:08:18,924 --> 01:08:20,758 ♪ Dem bones, dem bones ♪ Dem bones, dem bones, dry bones 1035 01:08:20,842 --> 01:08:22,927 ♪ Now hear the word of the Lord 1036 01:08:23,011 --> 01:08:24,845 ♪ Dem bones, dem bones ♪ Now the backbone 1037 01:08:24,930 --> 01:08:28,432 ♪ Oh, dem bones, dem bones They walk all over 1038 01:08:28,517 --> 01:08:30,768 ♪ Dem bones, dem bones gonna walk around ♪ 1039 01:08:30,811 --> 01:08:32,770 - I trust you. - What? 1040 01:08:34,022 --> 01:08:36,482 I said... I said I trust you. 1041 01:08:36,608 --> 01:08:38,025 Good. 1042 01:08:40,445 --> 01:08:42,530 Oh, boy. Oh, boy. 1043 01:08:50,789 --> 01:08:53,124 Oh, Freddie. 1044 01:08:56,461 --> 01:08:59,130 Jeannie. Hey, Jeannie. 1045 01:08:59,172 --> 01:09:01,382 Jeannie, you wanna hear a secret, huh? 1046 01:09:05,637 --> 01:09:10,307 Oh, Jeannie, I don't give a damn about racial, religious, 1047 01:09:10,392 --> 01:09:13,227 moral, economical, political problems. 1048 01:09:13,311 --> 01:09:16,564 - That makes two of us. - Eating meat disturbs me. 1049 01:09:17,816 --> 01:09:21,694 Right. Can you imagine raising poor little chickens, steers and lambs 1050 01:09:21,820 --> 01:09:23,320 to fill our tummies? 1051 01:09:23,405 --> 01:09:25,489 Now, there's a problem and nobody cares. 1052 01:09:25,532 --> 01:09:27,158 Right. 1053 01:09:27,242 --> 01:09:29,034 - Right? Huh? Right? - Right. 1054 01:09:29,161 --> 01:09:32,329 They take all the wool off the lamb, and then we eat it. 1055 01:09:32,414 --> 01:09:33,539 Oh, Dickie. 1056 01:09:33,665 --> 01:09:37,668 What is all this holier-than-thou crap that they hand us? 1057 01:09:38,170 --> 01:09:41,547 You know what I think? I think we were all created evil! 1058 01:09:41,673 --> 01:09:46,051 Then some wise guy... Some, uh... A left-winger or a... 1059 01:09:46,178 --> 01:09:50,389 A union organiser comes along and tells us that we all were created good. 1060 01:09:50,515 --> 01:09:53,517 We were all created in His image. Right? 1061 01:09:55,395 --> 01:09:57,730 - Wrong. 1062 01:09:57,856 --> 01:10:01,275 Hey, Jeannie. Jeannie, come here. 1063 01:10:01,359 --> 01:10:05,070 Now, I'm gonna tell you something. This is serious. 1064 01:10:06,198 --> 01:10:08,949 You're such a lovely girl, Jeannie, 1065 01:10:09,034 --> 01:10:10,951 but you talk too much. 1066 01:10:12,704 --> 01:10:14,371 I talk too much? 1067 01:10:14,456 --> 01:10:16,999 Didn't anybody ever tell you that? 1068 01:10:17,375 --> 01:10:19,126 You talk too much. 1069 01:10:20,337 --> 01:10:23,172 - I...? - Now turn out the lights. 1070 01:11:04,130 --> 01:11:05,798 I'm spending the night. 1071 01:11:14,975 --> 01:11:17,726 You're a son of a bitch. Do you know that? 1072 01:11:17,811 --> 01:11:20,104 Why am I a son of a bitch? 1073 01:11:20,188 --> 01:11:21,647 Because you get to me. 1074 01:11:22,440 --> 01:11:24,775 And anybody that gets to me... 1075 01:11:28,405 --> 01:11:29,947 You kill me. 1076 01:11:30,031 --> 01:11:31,949 Let's have some music. 1077 01:13:05,043 --> 01:13:06,543 ♪ Ow! 1078 01:13:06,628 --> 01:13:09,004 ♪ I said everybody 1079 01:13:10,131 --> 01:13:12,216 ♪ Throw up your hands now 1080 01:13:41,246 --> 01:13:45,374 ♪ Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah 1081 01:15:18,343 --> 01:15:21,095 ♪ I heard of skate-a-ling 1082 01:15:21,638 --> 01:15:23,555 ♪ Skate-a-ling 1083 01:15:23,640 --> 01:15:34,608 ♪ Skate-a-ling, skate-a-ling 1084 01:15:34,692 --> 01:15:38,070 ♪ Skate-a-ling, oh! 1085 01:16:05,682 --> 01:16:07,182 ♪ Ow! 1086 01:16:07,267 --> 01:16:09,643 ♪ I said everybody 1087 01:16:10,728 --> 01:16:12,813 ♪ Throw up your hands now 1088 01:16:41,718 --> 01:16:45,929 ♪ Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 1089 01:17:47,825 --> 01:17:49,284 Here we are. 1090 01:17:54,123 --> 01:17:55,582 Come on! 1091 01:17:56,042 --> 01:17:58,502 Well, come on. Here's the living room. 1092 01:17:58,586 --> 01:18:01,088 Come on. 1093 01:18:05,218 --> 01:18:06,885 Ooh! Oh! 1094 01:18:59,188 --> 01:19:01,064 Oh, oh, Chet. 1095 01:19:02,650 --> 01:19:04,359 Ooh, ooh, ooh. 1096 01:19:05,278 --> 01:19:08,613 ♪ You know, life's so funny, baby 1097 01:19:08,990 --> 01:19:12,075 ♪ Don't even know where I'm gonna run 1098 01:19:15,580 --> 01:19:18,832 ♪ You know, life's so funny, baby 1099 01:19:19,584 --> 01:19:23,545 ♪ Don't even know where I'm gonna run 1100 01:19:26,466 --> 01:19:29,551 ♪ You're still such a little darlin' 1101 01:19:30,178 --> 01:19:31,887 ♪ Expect so much ♪ 1102 01:19:31,971 --> 01:19:34,056 Leave her alone now, and stop it! 1103 01:19:34,140 --> 01:19:36,308 - Come and sit down. - Hey. 1104 01:19:36,392 --> 01:19:38,310 Let's just sit down! 1105 01:19:54,369 --> 01:19:55,869 It's a nice place you got here. 1106 01:19:58,206 --> 01:20:00,665 Thank you. It's 27 years old. 1107 01:20:00,750 --> 01:20:03,251 - Twenty-seven years old? - Oh, come on, Chettie! 1108 01:20:03,336 --> 01:20:06,588 Let's do some more twistin' and groovin'. 1109 01:20:06,672 --> 01:20:08,548 - Florence, the party's over. - Come on, Florence. 1110 01:20:08,633 --> 01:20:11,093 Oh, no. The party's just beginning. 1111 01:20:11,177 --> 01:20:13,345 - Right, Chettie? - Uh, yeah, right. 1112 01:20:13,429 --> 01:20:16,014 'Cause I'm mixing the drinkies. 1113 01:20:16,099 --> 01:20:18,016 Ladies, declare! 1114 01:20:18,101 --> 01:20:20,227 - Gin and tonic. - Scotch and soda. 1115 01:20:20,311 --> 01:20:22,979 Two glasses comin' up. Oh! 1116 01:20:29,028 --> 01:20:31,154 Look, I got these records. 1117 01:20:32,073 --> 01:20:33,532 Can we have some music, please? 1118 01:20:38,579 --> 01:20:41,331 Can we have some music or something, or are we just gonna sit here? 1119 01:20:42,500 --> 01:20:44,584 Where are you from, Chet? 1120 01:20:45,420 --> 01:20:46,878 Detroit. 1121 01:20:51,008 --> 01:20:52,467 Do you like Los Angeles? 1122 01:20:54,178 --> 01:20:56,012 Do you? 1123 01:20:57,140 --> 01:20:59,182 Well, I like the climate. 1124 01:21:00,184 --> 01:21:01,643 I do, too. 1125 01:21:11,028 --> 01:21:15,365 Well! Well, wasn't that some place tonight, huh? 1126 01:21:15,491 --> 01:21:20,120 And those dances. The, uh, Watusi and the Frug. 1127 01:21:20,204 --> 01:21:23,498 - Oh, yeah. - And the Dog and the Jerk. 1128 01:21:23,541 --> 01:21:25,542 - And the... - Did you like it? 1129 01:21:25,668 --> 01:21:27,627 With all those young boys? Of course I liked it. 1130 01:21:27,712 --> 01:21:29,171 Yeah. 1131 01:21:31,716 --> 01:21:33,800 - Yeah. - Of course I liked it. 1132 01:21:33,885 --> 01:21:37,012 I did notice that you handled yourself very well at the A-Go-Go. 1133 01:21:37,054 --> 01:21:39,347 Oh! Well, thank you. 1134 01:21:40,892 --> 01:21:43,560 You're definitely an individual type. 1135 01:21:44,520 --> 01:21:47,481 I mean, you don't seem to succumb to the atmosphere. 1136 01:21:47,565 --> 01:21:49,566 Who was the little blonde girl 1137 01:21:49,650 --> 01:21:53,236 with the big blue eyes and the big bazoom? 1138 01:21:54,697 --> 01:21:59,409 And did you notice the one in the black tights with the boots? 1139 01:21:59,494 --> 01:22:01,995 You have to have the figure for those tights. 1140 01:22:02,079 --> 01:22:04,080 I have never had any complaints, Louise. 1141 01:22:04,207 --> 01:22:06,333 Billie-May, I didn't say anything like that. 1142 01:22:12,423 --> 01:22:13,924 You... 1143 01:22:22,183 --> 01:22:25,769 Come on, now, you guys. I mean, like, you got nothin' to worry about. 1144 01:22:25,853 --> 01:22:28,230 Really. Believe me. None of ya. 1145 01:22:29,774 --> 01:22:31,274 Believe me, will ya? 1146 01:22:41,786 --> 01:22:44,120 You people are too much, man. Look... 1147 01:22:44,205 --> 01:22:45,455 Are you kiddin'? 1148 01:22:45,540 --> 01:22:48,124 Well, out of that whole room full of pretty, young chicks, 1149 01:22:48,251 --> 01:22:50,961 what made you come over to our table? 1150 01:22:51,212 --> 01:22:53,380 Oh, Billie-May, you know why? 1151 01:22:53,464 --> 01:22:56,258 Because there was something wrong with ya. 1152 01:22:56,300 --> 01:22:59,594 You guys were all sitting there like a bunch of... 1153 01:22:59,637 --> 01:23:02,806 Well, like you were gonna break into tears any minute. 1154 01:23:02,932 --> 01:23:06,142 Now, if I see someone trying to join in 1155 01:23:07,061 --> 01:23:08,895 and not knowing how, 1156 01:23:09,647 --> 01:23:11,815 if I myself know how 1157 01:23:11,941 --> 01:23:15,110 and always make it a point to know how with anybody, 1158 01:23:15,152 --> 01:23:16,820 and I say, "Go on over, man". 1159 01:23:16,904 --> 01:23:19,447 Kind of like, uh, Jesus said. You know. 1160 01:23:19,490 --> 01:23:22,325 ♪ Jesus said la, dee, da 1161 01:23:22,410 --> 01:23:25,287 ♪ God is love, love is dead ♪ 1162 01:23:25,329 --> 01:23:29,416 Kind of like Christ said, you know. Help thy neighbour, man. 1163 01:23:29,500 --> 01:23:31,835 - Is he the one that said that? Billie-May, 1164 01:23:31,961 --> 01:23:34,629 what difference does it make who said it? 1165 01:23:35,506 --> 01:23:37,591 What difference does it make who said it? 1166 01:23:37,675 --> 01:23:40,010 It could have been, uh... 1167 01:23:40,136 --> 01:23:41,595 It could have been Him. 1168 01:23:41,679 --> 01:23:44,347 It could have been Gandhi. It could have been Buddha. 1169 01:23:44,473 --> 01:23:47,100 It could have been spoodah. It could have been your daddy. 1170 01:23:47,184 --> 01:23:50,103 It could have been your mama. It could have been your uh-uh. 1171 01:23:50,187 --> 01:23:51,688 Could have been your huh-huh. 1172 01:23:51,772 --> 01:23:55,275 What difference, man? 1173 01:23:58,154 --> 01:24:01,114 Hey, listen, man. It's a very good way to express yourself. 1174 01:24:01,782 --> 01:24:03,199 What do you mean? 1175 01:24:04,327 --> 01:24:05,785 What? 1176 01:24:05,870 --> 01:24:08,038 I said, "What do you mean?" 1177 01:24:09,457 --> 01:24:12,208 Well, I said, like, take a guy my age. 1178 01:24:13,294 --> 01:24:15,962 I gotta have some kind of a release. 1179 01:24:16,047 --> 01:24:17,964 Now, do you wanna... 1180 01:24:18,049 --> 01:24:20,675 Well, I can't very well hold up a bank for kicks. 1181 01:24:20,718 --> 01:24:23,136 - That's against the law, right? - Right. 1182 01:24:23,220 --> 01:24:27,182 - Right, Chettie. - Then everybody agrees with me. 1183 01:24:27,892 --> 01:24:31,061 - Christ. So what do you do? - You dance. 1184 01:24:31,562 --> 01:24:34,314 - You dance. - You dance. 1185 01:24:34,398 --> 01:24:38,652 You have a few belts and go up to some chick's pad and make it, baby. 1186 01:24:39,862 --> 01:24:41,154 Make it? 1187 01:24:43,407 --> 01:24:46,660 Just make it, baby. You out-and-out lay down and... 1188 01:24:52,541 --> 01:24:54,042 And I... 1189 01:25:00,174 --> 01:25:03,259 Or you can sit around, have a drag and, uh, 1190 01:25:04,095 --> 01:25:06,221 think about what's wrong and all, you know? 1191 01:25:06,931 --> 01:25:08,431 Oh, I know what you mean. 1192 01:25:10,893 --> 01:25:13,395 - I think you do. - Oh, sure she does. 1193 01:25:13,437 --> 01:25:15,105 Sure she does. 1194 01:25:31,205 --> 01:25:33,081 - Well! - Well! 1195 01:25:40,131 --> 01:25:41,965 Yeah, boy. 1196 01:25:42,633 --> 01:25:46,136 Well, Louise, Maria, Florence, there it is. 1197 01:25:46,262 --> 01:25:47,804 This is it. 1198 01:25:47,930 --> 01:25:50,807 The, uh, new generation. The one our husbands... 1199 01:25:50,933 --> 01:25:53,810 That's fun... 1200 01:25:55,563 --> 01:25:57,439 That's funny as hell. 1201 01:25:58,482 --> 01:26:03,153 Billie-May, how'd you happen to get on the subject of our husbands again? 1202 01:26:07,575 --> 01:26:09,826 Well... Oh... 1203 01:26:11,829 --> 01:26:15,957 Because they're scared. They're scared men. I mean... 1204 01:26:18,669 --> 01:26:20,336 Well, they're... 1205 01:26:22,298 --> 01:26:24,174 They're scared of you. 1206 01:26:25,676 --> 01:26:28,678 They're scared of you. They're, uh... 1207 01:26:28,721 --> 01:26:30,305 - Really? - Mmm-hmm. 1208 01:26:30,347 --> 01:26:32,807 They are scared of your youth, 1209 01:26:34,685 --> 01:26:37,687 and your spirit, 1210 01:26:39,023 --> 01:26:41,065 and your build. 1211 01:26:42,234 --> 01:26:45,737 They think that they are the kings of the earth 1212 01:26:45,863 --> 01:26:49,908 and they do not want you takin' their place, see? 1213 01:27:01,670 --> 01:27:04,380 Well, I don't want it. I mean, not... 1214 01:27:08,010 --> 01:27:10,595 Well, I just don't want the hang-up. 1215 01:27:18,854 --> 01:27:20,522 Chettie! 1216 01:27:20,564 --> 01:27:24,234 You're a damn good-looking kid for only 23. 1217 01:27:24,360 --> 01:27:26,194 - Florence. - Let's dance. 1218 01:27:26,237 --> 01:27:29,864 ♪ Florence from Torrance She's got the insurance 1219 01:27:29,907 --> 01:27:33,409 ♪ Florence from Torrance The men all want Florence 1220 01:27:33,536 --> 01:27:36,871 ♪ The happiest chick that I ever did see 1221 01:27:36,914 --> 01:27:40,124 ♪ Until I met a girl named Billie-May 1222 01:27:40,251 --> 01:27:43,920 ♪ Come on, Billie-May I want it your way 1223 01:27:44,046 --> 01:27:48,049 ♪ Come on, Billie-May Make it any day 1224 01:27:48,092 --> 01:27:51,970 ♪ Come on, Billie-May I wanna do the thing 1225 01:27:52,096 --> 01:27:55,974 ♪ Do the little bell, babe Turn me on like hell, babe 1226 01:27:56,100 --> 01:28:00,603 ♪ Come on, Billie-May Hit the ray, you and me, Billie-May 1227 01:28:00,646 --> 01:28:04,148 ♪ Come on, now You will see everything for you and me 1228 01:28:04,275 --> 01:28:07,277 ♪ We will do all the things that we did before, my dear 1229 01:28:09,446 --> 01:28:11,322 ♪ Florence from Torrance 1230 01:28:11,448 --> 01:28:14,951 ♪ The hot-headed Florence Just what they can't see 1231 01:28:14,994 --> 01:28:18,246 ♪ The girl named Florence is groovy, you see 1232 01:28:18,289 --> 01:28:21,666 ♪ But all they want to do is spend her money 1233 01:28:21,792 --> 01:28:26,629 ♪ 'Cause she's got the insurance The girl from Torrance, Florence 1234 01:28:26,672 --> 01:28:30,133 ♪ Send all her allowance Florence from Torrance ♪ 1235 01:28:39,685 --> 01:28:41,185 - No. - Come on. 1236 01:28:41,770 --> 01:28:43,813 - No. - Come on. It's easy. 1237 01:28:44,690 --> 01:28:47,275 - No. No, Chet. I don't wanna. - Right shoe. 1238 01:28:47,318 --> 01:28:49,611 Right shoe. Yeah, baby. Put it right there. 1239 01:28:49,653 --> 01:28:51,362 - No. - Come on. 1240 01:28:51,488 --> 01:28:57,035 ♪ Put on the red meat, baby I want the red meat, baby 1241 01:28:57,161 --> 01:28:59,954 ♪ I like the rare meat, baby 1242 01:28:59,997 --> 01:29:04,500 ♪ Don't want no seasonin', baby No taters or no onions 1243 01:29:04,627 --> 01:29:06,836 ♪ All I wanna do is tonion 1244 01:29:06,879 --> 01:29:09,172 - Come on. That's it. 1245 01:29:09,673 --> 01:29:11,716 - Where are you... Come here. - No. 1246 01:29:11,842 --> 01:29:13,301 Right here, baby. It's easy. 1247 01:29:13,344 --> 01:29:16,012 ♪ I need your red meat, baby 1248 01:29:16,055 --> 01:29:19,015 ♪ It grooves me like your white meat, baby 1249 01:29:19,850 --> 01:29:23,478 ♪ Put it in the oven Want it big and round 1250 01:29:23,520 --> 01:29:26,689 ♪ Put it in the oven Eat it off the ground 1251 01:29:26,815 --> 01:29:29,317 ♪ Come on and do the slip and slide 1252 01:29:29,360 --> 01:29:31,361 ♪ I ain't had no goodies since your granny died 1253 01:29:33,030 --> 01:29:35,031 ♪ Put on the red meat, baby 1254 01:29:35,074 --> 01:29:37,158 ♪ Don't want no taters or onions 1255 01:29:37,201 --> 01:29:38,743 ♪ I just want a tonion 1256 01:29:38,869 --> 01:29:42,038 ♪ Come on and put on the red, baby 1257 01:29:45,042 --> 01:29:47,001 Come on. 1258 01:29:47,044 --> 01:29:49,545 ♪ I like the red meat, baby ♪ 1259 01:29:50,089 --> 01:29:53,091 Oh, I think we're makin' fools of ourselves. 1260 01:29:54,551 --> 01:29:56,844 - What? - Yeah. 1261 01:29:57,763 --> 01:29:59,722 I'm making a fool of myself? 1262 01:29:59,848 --> 01:30:01,599 Well, we are. Yeah. 1263 01:30:03,394 --> 01:30:06,604 - Well, who are you to criticise me? - I'm not criticising. I'm just saying... 1264 01:30:06,730 --> 01:30:09,232 You don't have to tell me I'm making a fool of myself. 1265 01:30:10,567 --> 01:30:13,069 Look, I know how to dance my way. 1266 01:30:13,112 --> 01:30:15,405 I don't need you to tell me about it. 1267 01:30:15,531 --> 01:30:17,073 I come from a musical background. 1268 01:30:17,199 --> 01:30:19,367 - I take care of a family of five. - Okay. Okay. 1269 01:30:19,410 --> 01:30:21,077 I have a college degree, 1270 01:30:21,203 --> 01:30:23,705 and I don't need you to tell me I'm making a fool of myself. 1271 01:30:23,747 --> 01:30:25,915 - Hey. Wait a minute. I'm sorry... - Don't touch me! 1272 01:30:38,929 --> 01:30:42,932 Chettie, you criticised her, honey. Criticise me. 1273 01:30:42,975 --> 01:30:46,561 At my age, I'm willing to learn, honey. Please. 1274 01:30:47,479 --> 01:30:50,440 Okay, you wanna cool it just for a moment? 1275 01:30:52,109 --> 01:30:56,779 ♪ Hot-headed Florence, she's from Torrance 1276 01:30:56,822 --> 01:31:00,491 ♪ The insurance for Chettie-boy 1277 01:31:00,617 --> 01:31:05,329 ♪ Oh, Billie-May She makes love in the hay 1278 01:31:06,790 --> 01:31:09,625 ♪ Hot-headed Florence 1279 01:31:09,752 --> 01:31:14,630 ♪ She's from Torrance with all the insurance 1280 01:31:15,007 --> 01:31:19,844 ♪ Hot-headed Florence Zoom, zoom, da-ditty 1281 01:31:22,431 --> 01:31:27,268 ♪ Oh, Maria You can't see Maria 1282 01:31:27,311 --> 01:31:32,315 ♪ Oh, you can't talk to Maria Oh, Maria ♪ 1283 01:31:36,653 --> 01:31:40,573 ♪ Louise, Louise, Louise, don't pee in the trees ♪ 1284 01:31:54,338 --> 01:31:55,838 Well. 1285 01:31:59,009 --> 01:32:03,513 Well, I think that I maintained my dignity throughout the entire thing. 1286 01:32:03,931 --> 01:32:07,350 I mean, hell, it isn't as if we did anything wrong. 1287 01:32:07,851 --> 01:32:10,686 All anybody has to do is just to look at the four of us. 1288 01:32:10,729 --> 01:32:13,689 I mean, to know that there was nothing wrong. 1289 01:32:13,732 --> 01:32:16,609 And if old Malcolm is gonna get upset over a... 1290 01:32:16,693 --> 01:32:18,736 Over a silly thing like that, then where are we? 1291 01:32:18,862 --> 01:32:20,446 But you know Louise. 1292 01:32:20,531 --> 01:32:23,241 She is gonna go home and talk about how vulgar it was 1293 01:32:23,367 --> 01:32:27,286 and how terrible we all behaved and how she went home the moment it all began. 1294 01:32:27,371 --> 01:32:28,454 But I don't... 1295 01:32:28,539 --> 01:32:32,041 Well, if she does, I'm just gonna tell her she's full of it. 1296 01:32:32,126 --> 01:32:34,961 But I don't think she will. Do you? 1297 01:32:35,045 --> 01:32:37,797 I mean, not that I give a damn anyway. 1298 01:32:41,218 --> 01:32:47,140 You know, this is gonna put her back on the couch for another 25 years. 1299 01:32:48,433 --> 01:32:50,893 I'll tell you something else funny, honey. 1300 01:32:50,978 --> 01:32:52,562 I love Malcolm. 1301 01:32:53,438 --> 01:32:56,566 Yes, I am in love with my husband. 1302 01:32:57,734 --> 01:32:59,235 How about that? 1303 01:33:09,580 --> 01:33:11,289 I think he's nice. 1304 01:33:12,291 --> 01:33:13,749 Don't you? 1305 01:33:17,087 --> 01:33:18,796 You know my Louie. 1306 01:33:19,798 --> 01:33:21,465 So short. 1307 01:33:21,592 --> 01:33:23,426 Those awful glasses. 1308 01:33:25,762 --> 01:33:29,098 And he can't carry a tune, much less dance. 1309 01:33:32,436 --> 01:33:34,187 What's the matter? 1310 01:33:35,105 --> 01:33:36,606 Are you tired? 1311 01:33:39,443 --> 01:33:43,279 Oh, come on. Don't be tired. The evening's young, you know. 1312 01:33:44,948 --> 01:33:47,658 You know, these dances, these wild, crazy dances, 1313 01:33:47,784 --> 01:33:50,953 I think they've succeeded where science failed. 1314 01:33:52,289 --> 01:33:55,499 'Cause, you know, I can go to a beauty parlour and sit there for hours 1315 01:33:55,626 --> 01:33:59,128 having my hair done and my nails polished, 1316 01:33:59,630 --> 01:34:01,964 but I don't feel any younger. 1317 01:34:02,674 --> 01:34:04,342 I might look it. 1318 01:34:05,469 --> 01:34:09,513 But these dances, these wild, crazy dances, 1319 01:34:09,973 --> 01:34:12,308 they do something to me inside. 1320 01:34:15,479 --> 01:34:18,731 Well, to hell with Louie. 1321 01:34:20,567 --> 01:34:24,153 Because do you know one of these days I'm gonna croak? 1322 01:34:24,821 --> 01:34:28,491 And I'm gonna flop down on the ground, and some goddamn preacher's 1323 01:34:28,533 --> 01:34:32,036 gonna preach a goddamn sermon over my goddamn body! 1324 01:34:34,206 --> 01:34:36,999 Oh, Chettie, Chettie, Chettie. 1325 01:34:37,042 --> 01:34:40,336 Oh! Oh, Chettie. 1326 01:34:41,838 --> 01:34:45,675 Let's put on another record and dance some more, shall we? 1327 01:34:46,510 --> 01:34:47,927 Shall we? 1328 01:35:07,406 --> 01:35:09,865 Oh. Oh, Chettie. 1329 01:35:09,950 --> 01:35:12,034 I'm so exhausted. 1330 01:35:12,077 --> 01:35:15,288 Oh! I'm so exhausted. 1331 01:35:16,707 --> 01:35:18,582 - I'm... - Oh. Wait. 1332 01:35:21,878 --> 01:35:24,547 Oh, Chettie! 1333 01:35:26,049 --> 01:35:29,218 ...Oh, Chettie. Chettie. 1334 01:35:29,803 --> 01:35:35,391 Oh, Chettie, you know, I just love to dance, don't you? 1335 01:35:36,393 --> 01:35:38,936 I love ya, Flo. I just love ya. 1336 01:35:39,062 --> 01:35:42,565 Oh, you know, I could... I could just dance... 1337 01:35:43,066 --> 01:35:45,234 Dance all night with you. 1338 01:35:45,277 --> 01:35:49,405 - Oh. You know it? - I know you could. 1339 01:36:22,939 --> 01:36:25,524 Oh, that's so wonderful. 1340 01:36:26,443 --> 01:36:28,277 You're wonderful. 1341 01:36:33,492 --> 01:36:34,950 Chettie, 1342 01:36:39,373 --> 01:36:41,123 would you kiss me? 1343 01:36:42,125 --> 01:36:43,542 Florence. Florence. 1344 01:37:17,369 --> 01:37:21,247 Chettie, will you drive me home? 1345 01:37:22,749 --> 01:37:24,208 Sure. 1346 01:37:25,669 --> 01:37:27,795 Sure. I'll drive you home. 1347 01:37:41,101 --> 01:37:43,644 Chettie! Chettie! 1348 01:37:43,728 --> 01:37:45,688 You said you'd drive me home. 1349 01:37:45,772 --> 01:37:47,523 I will. I will. 1350 01:37:48,608 --> 01:37:51,569 Maria, he is driving me home. 1351 01:37:51,653 --> 01:37:55,322 - Florence, you haven't got a car. - Let me have your car. 1352 01:37:56,783 --> 01:38:00,369 - I will drive you home. - I will return it tomorrow. 1353 01:38:04,708 --> 01:38:07,084 All right. Let me get the keys. 1354 01:38:11,298 --> 01:38:12,756 I'll drive. 1355 01:40:22,137 --> 01:40:24,138 You son of a... 1356 01:40:24,222 --> 01:40:26,432 - No, no. - Yes, yes, yes. 1357 01:40:26,516 --> 01:40:28,851 - No, no, no, no, no. - Yes, yes. 1358 01:42:11,830 --> 01:42:13,372 Let me change. 1359 01:42:14,916 --> 01:42:16,375 Okay. 1360 01:42:19,713 --> 01:42:23,424 ♪ If I find my love will I be a louse? 1361 01:42:23,508 --> 01:42:26,760 ♪ Who cares, man? I'm gonna do it anyway 1362 01:42:26,845 --> 01:42:29,221 ♪ Just the way I got to do it today 1363 01:42:29,305 --> 01:42:31,765 ♪ Turn around and we'll all play 1364 01:42:31,850 --> 01:42:34,810 ♪ Pull down the spread Pull down the covers 1365 01:42:34,894 --> 01:42:37,646 ♪ Gonna get in and have another's 1366 01:42:37,731 --> 01:42:40,482 ♪ Lovers' little bed and gonna have fun 1367 01:42:40,567 --> 01:42:43,444 ♪ Undress, baby, and we'll be one 1368 01:42:43,528 --> 01:42:46,488 ♪ Take down your pants Take down your drawers 1369 01:42:46,573 --> 01:42:49,450 ♪ Gonna show your daddy what his balls are for 1370 01:42:51,286 --> 01:42:53,996 ♪ Come on, honey, take off my socks ♪ 1371 01:43:27,322 --> 01:43:29,782 It's the lights. 1372 01:43:31,117 --> 01:43:32,951 I don't like lights. 1373 01:43:54,265 --> 01:43:56,725 Yeah, well, I'm all wet. 1374 01:43:58,186 --> 01:43:59,895 You know you have a beautiful body? 1375 01:44:00,355 --> 01:44:02,564 Yeah, well... 1376 01:44:02,649 --> 01:44:04,149 I've been told that, yes. 1377 01:44:13,201 --> 01:44:15,035 I have been seduced. 1378 01:44:23,837 --> 01:44:25,295 Is it a nice feeling? 1379 01:44:25,380 --> 01:44:28,090 I am not tired, if that's what you mean. 1380 01:44:28,466 --> 01:44:29,925 Eat your eggs. 1381 01:44:31,845 --> 01:44:33,512 What does that mean? 1382 01:44:34,389 --> 01:44:38,350 It means that your eggs are hot, and they're gonna get cold. 1383 01:44:43,940 --> 01:44:45,899 You're a lousy cook. 1384 01:44:45,984 --> 01:44:50,404 Thank you. I love to cook. My mom always told me, "You wanna eat, cook. 1385 01:44:50,488 --> 01:44:51,947 "Otherwise you'll be skinny. 1386 01:44:52,031 --> 01:44:54,825 "And skinny people are not like fat people. 1387 01:44:54,909 --> 01:44:56,785 "Fat people are jolly." 1388 01:44:56,870 --> 01:44:58,912 - Right? - Wrong. 1389 01:44:59,497 --> 01:45:02,749 Skinny people are happy because they're not fat. 1390 01:45:03,042 --> 01:45:04,710 Okay, I'll diet. 1391 01:45:05,169 --> 01:45:06,628 You're not fat. 1392 01:45:08,214 --> 01:45:10,674 - What? - You're voluptuous. 1393 01:45:13,177 --> 01:45:14,636 What? 1394 01:45:16,014 --> 01:45:18,098 I can't hear you, Dickie. 1395 01:45:18,975 --> 01:45:21,393 Oh. Dishes. 1396 01:45:52,008 --> 01:45:53,759 Well, that's a negative attitude. 1397 01:45:53,843 --> 01:45:55,969 - What? Putting on my pants? - Yeah. 1398 01:45:56,054 --> 01:45:58,138 Well, I just hate getting out of bed. That's all. 1399 01:45:58,222 --> 01:46:00,474 Stop apologising. I love ya. 1400 01:46:00,975 --> 01:46:04,019 - Don't be so bighearted. - What an answer. 1401 01:46:04,646 --> 01:46:07,522 - Well, you make lousy eggs. - I do? 1402 01:46:07,815 --> 01:46:10,275 Yes, and I don't know how anyone could make lousy eggs. 1403 01:46:10,360 --> 01:46:13,111 Look, in my whole life nobody ever told me I make lousy eggs. 1404 01:46:13,196 --> 01:46:15,155 Yeah, but nobody was ever honest with you before. 1405 01:46:15,239 --> 01:46:16,907 - Oh, yeah? - Yeah. 1406 01:46:17,909 --> 01:46:21,203 - What do you want? Cigarettes? - Oh, no, I quit. 1407 01:46:21,746 --> 01:46:24,289 I don't smoke either. I never did. 1408 01:46:25,124 --> 01:46:27,334 - Well, don't I get any credit for that? - No. 1409 01:46:28,127 --> 01:46:30,462 Did you know I steal in supermarkets? 1410 01:46:30,546 --> 01:46:32,464 And I don't like dogs. 1411 01:46:33,758 --> 01:46:37,135 - You don't like dogs? - Hate them. Puppies even. 1412 01:46:37,470 --> 01:46:39,554 What do you mean you steal? 1413 01:46:43,851 --> 01:46:45,352 Oh, you jerk. 1414 01:46:46,312 --> 01:46:50,148 Just don't ever say you know all of Jeannie Rapp's secrets. 1415 01:46:50,775 --> 01:46:53,485 - You're wearing false eyelashes. - So? 1416 01:46:53,945 --> 01:46:57,406 You're stupid. So help me God, you're stupid. 1417 01:46:57,991 --> 01:47:00,951 I'm stupid? You can't even say a decent, 1418 01:47:01,035 --> 01:47:02,452 "Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers". 1419 01:47:02,537 --> 01:47:06,164 All you do is say, "Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled poopers". 1420 01:47:06,249 --> 01:47:08,250 Well, that doesn't make any sense. 1421 01:47:08,334 --> 01:47:10,919 I dream of Jeannie, Peter Piper, 1422 01:47:11,713 --> 01:47:14,339 laughing, dancing, having a good time. 1423 01:47:14,966 --> 01:47:17,509 Does it begin to come back to you? 1424 01:47:17,844 --> 01:47:19,720 Oh, you're such a child. 1425 01:47:19,804 --> 01:47:22,723 I am not a child. You're a... You're a lousy dancer. 1426 01:47:22,807 --> 01:47:24,975 - You oughta take lessons. - Well, I took dances. 1427 01:47:25,476 --> 01:47:29,104 You know, you have a tin ear, too. You can't even carry a tune. 1428 01:47:29,188 --> 01:47:33,984 But last night, you danced and you sang and you just let it all go 1429 01:47:34,068 --> 01:47:36,445 and didn't we have a good time? 1430 01:47:36,821 --> 01:47:39,322 You liked making love to me, didn't you? 1431 01:47:39,699 --> 01:47:41,158 Yes, I did. 1432 01:47:41,242 --> 01:47:43,910 So, you see, there. That's good, isn't it? 1433 01:47:43,995 --> 01:47:47,039 And you enjoyed my company, too, didn't you? 1434 01:47:47,123 --> 01:47:48,582 I enjoyed your company. 1435 01:47:49,083 --> 01:47:52,169 And you said that you trusted me, didn't you? 1436 01:47:52,879 --> 01:47:54,379 Yes, I did. 1437 01:47:54,464 --> 01:47:59,051 And you thought Peter Piper was pretty important last night, didn't you? 1438 01:47:59,886 --> 01:48:02,304 - Didn't you? - Yes, I did. 1439 01:48:03,222 --> 01:48:07,392 You see? I'm always right. 1440 01:48:07,852 --> 01:48:10,020 I listened to your demented dialogue, too, didn't I? 1441 01:48:10,104 --> 01:48:13,398 - Yes, you did. - And I thought you were crazy, didn't I? 1442 01:48:13,483 --> 01:48:17,319 But I made love to you, and I held you in my arms all night. 1443 01:48:17,403 --> 01:48:19,321 And if you'd been out in the street last night, 1444 01:48:19,405 --> 01:48:22,157 they'd have had you committed. Wouldn't they? 1445 01:48:22,909 --> 01:48:24,576 Right? 1446 01:48:24,660 --> 01:48:26,161 I suppose so. 1447 01:48:26,829 --> 01:48:29,331 You son of a gun. 1448 01:48:31,375 --> 01:48:33,460 How come you hate me now? 1449 01:48:35,505 --> 01:48:36,963 Jeannie, 1450 01:48:39,801 --> 01:48:41,384 do me a favour? 1451 01:48:44,806 --> 01:48:46,848 Don't be silly any more. 1452 01:48:47,600 --> 01:48:49,309 Just be yourself. 1453 01:48:52,939 --> 01:48:54,606 But I am myself. 1454 01:48:56,526 --> 01:48:57,984 Who else would I be? 1455 01:48:58,694 --> 01:49:00,153 I'm serious. 1456 01:49:03,699 --> 01:49:05,742 Definition of "serious". 1457 01:49:06,828 --> 01:49:09,621 Blah, blah, blah, blah. 1458 01:49:25,930 --> 01:49:28,557 Let me get this garbage out of here. 1459 01:49:29,725 --> 01:49:34,062 ♪ I dream of Jeannie with the light brown hair 1460 01:49:34,689 --> 01:49:38,984 ♪ Borne like a vapour on the summer air 1461 01:49:39,777 --> 01:49:44,072 ♪ I see her tripping where the light something grows 1462 01:49:45,074 --> 01:49:50,203 ♪ I dream of Jeannie with the light brown hair 1463 01:49:50,621 --> 01:49:53,206 ♪ Borne like a... Ah! 1464 01:49:53,791 --> 01:49:55,959 ♪ On the summer air 1465 01:49:57,128 --> 01:50:00,005 ♪ I see her tripping 1466 01:50:01,090 --> 01:50:04,384 ♪ Where the light something grows 1467 01:50:06,429 --> 01:50:08,138 ♪ Happy as a... ♪ 1468 01:50:11,767 --> 01:50:13,226 Jeannie. 1469 01:50:14,937 --> 01:50:16,396 Jeannie? 1470 01:50:25,406 --> 01:50:29,367 Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers. 1471 01:50:29,452 --> 01:50:32,287 Now, if Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers, 1472 01:50:32,371 --> 01:50:34,664 where is the peck of pickled peppers Peter picked? 1473 01:50:35,499 --> 01:50:37,792 Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers. 1474 01:50:37,877 --> 01:50:40,420 If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers, 1475 01:50:40,504 --> 01:50:43,215 where's the peck of pickled peppers Peter picked? 1476 01:50:50,640 --> 01:50:53,350 Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers. 1477 01:50:53,434 --> 01:50:56,228 Now, if Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers, 1478 01:50:56,312 --> 01:50:59,231 where is the peck of pickled peppers Peter picked? 1479 01:50:59,315 --> 01:51:00,482 Peter Piper picked a peck... 1480 01:51:00,566 --> 01:51:02,234 Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers. 1481 01:51:02,318 --> 01:51:06,071 If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers... 1482 01:51:15,039 --> 01:51:18,917 Operator, I want the emergency rescue squad. 1483 01:51:19,919 --> 01:51:21,378 My number? 1484 01:51:22,421 --> 01:51:24,005 My number is... 1485 01:52:26,152 --> 01:52:27,610 No way. 1486 01:52:31,240 --> 01:52:32,699 Come on. 1487 01:53:01,729 --> 01:53:04,272 Come on, now, drink this, damn it! 1488 01:53:05,316 --> 01:53:07,442 Goddamn bitch. Drink this! 1489 01:53:40,226 --> 01:53:41,684 Please walk. 1490 01:53:47,483 --> 01:53:48,942 Walk. 1491 01:53:49,276 --> 01:53:51,111 Maria, walk, please. 1492 01:54:02,081 --> 01:54:04,416 Walk. Come on. 1493 01:55:24,622 --> 01:55:27,040 Come on, now. Don't go back out. 1494 01:55:55,069 --> 01:55:57,946 No. You gotta stay awake. Please. 1495 01:55:59,782 --> 01:56:01,241 I don't want you to die. 1496 01:56:11,168 --> 01:56:12,669 Please, lady. 1497 01:56:16,924 --> 01:56:21,427 You gotta stay awake. 1498 01:56:25,933 --> 01:56:28,142 - You gotta stay awake. 1499 01:56:36,193 --> 01:56:37,819 Hey. Come on. Come on. 1500 01:56:37,903 --> 01:56:39,696 Come on, now! God damn it! 1501 01:56:40,739 --> 01:56:42,240 Now, come on! 1502 01:56:51,375 --> 01:56:53,001 That's it! Oh! Oh! Oh! 1503 01:56:53,085 --> 01:56:55,628 Ooh, you gonna cry? Oh! Come on. 1504 01:56:56,171 --> 01:56:57,797 Come on. 1505 01:56:57,881 --> 01:57:01,342 I didn't want to hit you, but don't go to sleep on me. 1506 01:57:01,427 --> 01:57:05,179 Oh! Come on, now. Cry. That's it. That's life, honey. 1507 01:57:05,264 --> 01:57:08,016 Tears are happiness, man. Just do it. 1508 01:57:08,100 --> 01:57:10,351 Come on, now. Oh. 1509 01:57:10,436 --> 01:57:11,978 You silly nut. 1510 01:57:15,024 --> 01:57:17,066 Do you want some coffee? 1511 01:57:17,151 --> 01:57:19,569 Can I trust ya? Huh? Huh? 1512 01:57:20,154 --> 01:57:21,613 Okay. Wait a minute. 1513 01:57:21,697 --> 01:57:24,198 I don't trust ya anyway. I don't. 1514 01:57:24,617 --> 01:57:27,076 - Ah! You little sneaky, you. 1515 01:57:27,161 --> 01:57:29,037 I'm gonna get you some coffee. 1516 01:58:11,330 --> 01:58:12,789 I'm cold. 1517 01:58:52,246 --> 01:58:53,705 I like you. 1518 01:58:55,374 --> 01:58:58,501 I caused you a lot of pain and a lot of grief, 1519 01:58:59,169 --> 01:59:01,546 and I almost killed ya. 1520 01:59:01,630 --> 01:59:03,965 And I prayed, man. Oh... I prayed to God. 1521 01:59:04,049 --> 01:59:07,218 I said, "God, please, dear God, don't let anything happen to her 1522 01:59:07,302 --> 01:59:10,221 "'cause I love her so much, and I'll do anything you say, God". 1523 01:59:10,305 --> 01:59:12,598 And, man, I don't even believe in Him, you know. 1524 01:59:12,683 --> 01:59:16,144 But, I mean, it doesn't matter. I... We protect ourselves. 1525 01:59:16,228 --> 01:59:20,273 So, when you talk ethics and values and honesty, 1526 01:59:20,357 --> 01:59:23,609 and I'm a nice guy and you're a nice guy 1527 01:59:24,945 --> 01:59:27,363 and this and that, you know, I mean, it just doesn't matter. 1528 01:59:31,660 --> 01:59:33,119 Nobody cares. 1529 01:59:33,203 --> 01:59:37,415 Nobody has the time to be vulnerable to each other. 1530 01:59:38,917 --> 01:59:41,085 So, we just go on. 1531 01:59:41,170 --> 01:59:46,632 I mean, right away our armour comes out like a shield and goes around us 1532 01:59:46,717 --> 01:59:49,802 and we become like mechanical men. 1533 01:59:49,887 --> 01:59:52,388 Yeah. And I called you a mechanical woman, huh? 1534 01:59:52,473 --> 01:59:54,515 I got news. I'm so mechanical... 1535 01:59:54,600 --> 01:59:58,019 Honey, it's absolutely ludicrous how mechanical a person can be. 1536 02:00:00,981 --> 02:00:02,815 I am the sexiest guy in the world. 1537 02:00:05,694 --> 02:00:08,446 I have blond hair. 1538 02:00:09,615 --> 02:00:13,034 I can get all the women I want. 1539 02:00:13,827 --> 02:00:15,703 You're waking up, aren't ya? 1540 02:00:17,790 --> 02:00:19,874 You silly little puddin'. 1541 02:00:20,667 --> 02:00:23,169 Yes, I am a silly little puddin'. 1542 02:00:27,466 --> 02:00:31,219 You know, anybody that would pop a lot of sleeping pills, 1543 02:00:32,095 --> 02:00:33,596 anybody that would 1544 02:00:33,680 --> 02:00:36,682 their guts out, you know, in front of company, 1545 02:00:36,767 --> 02:00:41,771 anybody that would let a guy slap her and not be mad at him... 1546 02:00:41,855 --> 02:00:44,190 - You're supposed to be saving my life. - ...hasn't got much to say. 1547 02:00:44,274 --> 02:00:47,068 I've got lots to say. You wanna try me? 1548 02:00:48,362 --> 02:00:51,072 No, I hate you. I really hate you. 1549 02:01:30,112 --> 02:01:31,612 ♪ Yes, I know 1550 02:01:36,076 --> 02:01:37,952 ♪ Yes, I know 1551 02:01:38,036 --> 02:01:40,830 ♪ Oh, didn't Daniel in that lions' den 1552 02:01:48,714 --> 02:01:51,549 ♪ Oh, Lord, I'm ready 1553 02:01:51,633 --> 02:01:56,137 ♪ I'll be ready when that great day comes 1554 02:01:56,221 --> 02:01:58,681 ♪ Oh, glory, hallelujah 1555 02:01:58,765 --> 02:02:01,809 ♪ Ready, oh, Lord, I'm ready 1556 02:02:02,185 --> 02:02:04,979 ♪ I'll be ready when that great... ♪ 1557 02:03:04,539 --> 02:03:06,958 I thought you just had problems. 1558 02:03:13,674 --> 02:03:16,467 That's wonderful. That's something new. 1559 02:03:17,761 --> 02:03:19,553 A noble adulteress. 1560 02:03:21,139 --> 02:03:23,641 I think you ought to be rewarded. 1561 02:03:26,770 --> 02:03:31,565 I'll write it into a policy. You commit adultery, the adulterer gets killed. 1562 02:03:33,777 --> 02:03:37,655 The beneficiary, who is the adulteress, gets paid off, right? 1563 02:03:37,739 --> 02:03:39,615 Dickie, I don't care. 1564 02:03:44,204 --> 02:03:47,665 Rejected for the thousandth time in 14 years. 1565 02:03:51,586 --> 02:03:53,295 She doesn't care. 1566 02:03:57,968 --> 02:04:01,554 All I have to do is find that 10-year-old rapist and kill him. 1567 02:04:02,806 --> 02:04:04,348 And then you get paid off. 1568 02:04:04,433 --> 02:04:07,018 You don't need me, you don't need any man. 1569 02:04:07,102 --> 02:04:09,228 And I'll write the policy. 1570 02:04:21,366 --> 02:04:25,703 What the hell were you doing? Chasing each other all over the house? 1571 02:04:26,830 --> 02:04:30,249 You couldn't get laid in bed, so you come down to the kitchen? 1572 02:04:30,333 --> 02:04:34,086 Then you go up and take a shower to wash off the kitchen? 1573 02:04:39,092 --> 02:04:42,053 You get laid once and everything is solved! 1574 02:04:44,514 --> 02:04:49,602 Get all the soldiers in Vietnam laid and the whole Middle East problem is solved! 1575 02:04:52,647 --> 02:04:56,317 You want violence, huh? You want me to be violent? Is that it? 1576 02:04:56,401 --> 02:05:00,905 You want me to slap you across the face every time you open your mouth? 1577 02:05:08,038 --> 02:05:09,622 I hate my life. 1578 02:05:13,460 --> 02:05:15,377 I just don't love you. 1579 02:06:06,805 --> 02:06:09,098 Throw me a cigarette, please. 1580 02:06:17,691 --> 02:06:19,150 A light. 1581 02:06:33,290 --> 02:06:35,082 My lighter, please. 1582 02:07:01,610 --> 02:07:04,236 Those pills, they tie up your lungs. 1583 02:07:05,739 --> 02:07:07,198 Ouch. 1584 02:07:37,395 --> 02:07:40,064 ♪ Never felt like this before 1585 02:07:40,148 --> 02:07:47,863 ♪ Never felt like this before 1586 02:07:47,948 --> 02:07:51,575 ♪ I see you in the storm 1587 02:07:51,660 --> 02:07:54,745 ♪ And you hold me in your arms 1588 02:07:54,829 --> 02:07:58,624 ♪ And I feel safe and warm 1589 02:07:58,708 --> 02:08:02,253 ♪ I want you always by my side Don't you ever let me leave 1590 02:08:02,337 --> 02:08:04,546 ♪ Or get away from you 1591 02:08:04,631 --> 02:08:08,884 ♪ I'm gonna stick like glue 1592 02:08:08,969 --> 02:08:12,346 ♪ 'Cause you knew what I was after 1593 02:08:12,430 --> 02:08:15,891 ♪ Now the time is for laughter 1594 02:08:17,352 --> 02:08:19,853 ♪ What you doin' standin' way over there 1595 02:08:19,938 --> 02:08:24,525 - Excuse me. ♪ I want you to come stand over here 1596 02:08:24,609 --> 02:08:28,487 ♪ And never leave me here alone 1597 02:08:28,571 --> 02:08:31,323 ♪ Have you felt like this before 1598 02:08:31,408 --> 02:08:41,333 ♪ Never felt like this before 1599 02:08:41,710 --> 02:08:42,835 ♪ Never felt like this before ♪ 122787