All language subtitles for The Magicians s04e02 Lost, Found, Fucked.eg

.

- Previously on
"The Magicians."

- Alice is fine.
Depressed.

Surly.

Still asking to see you again.

- She's fixated on the thing

she says she saw
in the Castle.

She's worried
about her friends.

- I can't think of anyone
better protected than they.

They must stay where they are
as they are.

- They'll be fine.

Your spellwork was
was masterful.

[high-pitched whine]

- There's something
you need to know

and as soon as I start
telling you about this,

bad shit is gonna start
flying at our heads.

[glass shattering,
electricity sparking]

- So how do we figure out
who we really are?

- Hi. I'm Marina.

I'm here to help.

- So you're like
some powerful, benevolent

White Witch?

- Uh-huh.

Let's take a peek underneath

and see what you
really look like.

[all coughing, gagging]

- [gagging]

- Fix it.

- I don't know what
you want me to fix!

- Whatever the matter is
in Fillory!

- [screaming] Hello?

Hello?!

[dramatic musical sting]

[tense percussive music]

♪

- Old.

Things get old so fast,
don't they?

- Sorry, but where are we?

- I told you, Greece.

- Right, right.

- This is the temple of the god
we are summoning.

Enyalius.

God of war.

- Thought that was Ares.

- [chuckles]

Say that when you see him.

It makes him so mad.

So okay. Go in the woods.

Get a pig.

- Excuse me?

- A wild pig.

The younger the better.

- Sorry, I don't mean
to be difficult,

but couldn't you
just conjure one?

- Hmm, no.

It has to be caught
with human hands

and stained with human effort.

You know, that, that stuff

that comes out of your skin.

- Sweat?

- Hurry.

- [coughing]

What the fuck did you do?

- I didn't do anything.

That spell's a cunt with fangs.

- I thought your amulet
was supposed to protect us.

- It did. You're alive
and welcome, asshole.

- Well, great, that didn't work
and we're back to square one.

[phone buzzing]

Yeah?
- Hello,

whoever you are.

Do not tamper
with my enchantment.

- Holy shit,
it's James Earl Jones!

- Shut. Up.

- Yes, you've triggered
a read-me file voicemail.

And no, you may not take me
off speaker phone.

You will not circumvent
or defeat this spell.

Whoever you are, walk away.
Now.

Or your death is as certain
as those I've enchanted.

- So spells are basically
credit cards

with automated
fraud warning calls?

[laughing]
That's not super inspired.

- Well, neither is Henry Fogg.

You are his favorite students,
right?

[chuckling] Sit in the kitchen

until I tell you it's safe.

You stay.

[chuckling]

- She scares me.

- Yeah, well, she's not
the one with the Glock.

- I've got a theory
about you, stud.

- [grunts]
- Stand close.

- Ooh.

- Oh, Henry.
Such a good try.

- [laughing nervously]
What are you doing?

Ow.
- [chuckling]

I'm making you useful.

- Wait.

Where's Janet?

- Hello?

Anyone?

Mother Nature, can you hear me?

Wow, forests don't even talk.

Whole psychotic break
just lacks imagination.

- Again.

- Jesus.
- Dude.

The chips.

- How am I doing this?

[cackling]

- Yes.

This pond better be vodka.

[screams]

[eerie music]

♪

[gasping]

- Your Majesty?

- Jesus fuck.

[panting]

- Forgive the suddenness
of my introduction.

I know you're not
quite yourself, King Margo.

- What are you?

Where am I?

And why does everybody
in this nightmare

keep calling me king?

Is that even a thing?

- I'll endeavor to explain.

[bug buzzing]

[buzzing stops]

- Hello.

You're being kind of quiet.

- [sighs]

Look, you're nice and all.

Sort of. But I could use
some intel on this place

but how do I know
you're not a snitch?

- Well, because

like it or not, I'm Santa.

Which used to mean I was once
considered fairly honest.

Reasonably reliable,
but I, I don't know.

Maybe, uh...

slightly admired.

Then all of the sudden
everyone's like, "Hey.

You break into houses once
a year. What's up with that?"

And, uh,
"Kids sit on your lap.

How is that not creepy?"

Congratulations, Earth.

You ruined the name of Santa.

So you don't want
to hear from me?

Good.

'Cause I'm sure you don't need

this thing I could get you.

Called magic.

- How?

[water squelches]

- I am the Lord of All
Fillorian Fresh Water.

Which is a bit pretentious,

so, please, call me Lord Fresh.

- Assuming this
is actually happening,

you pulled me down here.

Why?

- Your birthright box.

- You and my birth box

ain't happening

so back up, "Shape of Water."

- No, no.
Your birthright box.

There.

- Oh.

Right.

- No, Majesty!

If you touch it,
it will harm you.

Even my protective wards
couldn't save you.

- You know about
that spell shit?

I'm really somebody else,

and if I try to figure out who

shit clobbers me, burns me?

- Correct.

Though, as I said,
you're safe down here.

Your birthright box,

which it has been
my honor to guard,

dictated your absence
from the kingdom,

your loss of self,
and your return

this day and hour.

But I must caution.

It also predicted

that you would learn what it is

to live and rule alone.

- Yeah? Well, alone's my jam,
grenouille.

And no matter what, I rule.

[cave rumbling]

- Your enchantment
is most powerful.

I'm not sure that my wards
will hold.

To come back and claim
your destiny,

you must find the god
who summoned you in the dream.

[cave rumbling]

Please accept my apologies.

I'm afraid I can't keep you
as safe as I had hoped.

[cave rumbling]

Walk toward the mountains.

- My destiny is to die
of pneumonia, isn't it?

You can tell me.

- Hardly, Majesty.

Please return
when the spell is lifted.

Here's your lunch.

- Ugh!

[screaming]

[typewriter clacking]

[space warping]

- Well, if he did anything
like my Henry,

he keeps most of his secrets...

in here.

[typewriter clacking]

Todd.

- Oh, my God.

Hansel?

- Hey.
- We gotta hustle.

- Yeah, uh...

anything I can do?

- Yeah. Take your shirt off

and make me a sandwich.

- Sorry, but I'm starved.

If it helps, I'm vegan,

so this sucks for me too.

[sword clanks]

- Todd? Jesus, are you drunk?

[groaning]

[labored breathing]

[groans] Marina.

- Hello, Henry.

- What is this?
What did you do?

- It's the same blue shit
you gave Hansel.

Only I knew you wouldn't
drink it at my request.

So here's the deal.

Give yourself the antidote.

- There is no antidote.

- Bullshit.

- Whoa, hoo, hoo, hoo!

So it's true!

Everything she's been
telling us is true!

- Us?

Who else is involved in this?

- Pretty much all
of your apple-shining,

ass-kissing teacher's pets.

- Christ.

Whatever she's saying she's

going to do to help you,
she isn't.

And how are you talking
about this without--

- Being attacked by the world?

It's magic, remember?

- What timeline are you from?

- The one where you owe me
child support.

I'm kidding.

So the spell takes what,

a day to kick in?

It's almost dawn.

You say there's no antidote.

You better get to a lab
and get to it.

Because I'm not turning you
into a DJ.

No.

You won't like the new you.

Unless you have a secret dream
to live in a moving box.

- [exhales deeply]

- You just hit the rethink
button, okay?

Let's go.

- Bye.

[space warps]

- Jesus.

- Todd.

How long have you been awake?

- We need to get you some help.

- No. And what you just saw
dies with you.

Do you understand?

.

[all yawning, snoring]

- This cannot continue.

- An infinity of pardons,

Acting High King Fen.

There is an urgent matter.

- An urgent poacher?

- Who claims to be
the High King.

- So an urgent, insane poacher.

- Was my first thought.
- Until?

- The name...was uttered.

- So.

You claim to be High King...

Margo?

- No!

[metallic thud]

- Ow!

- There you have it.

- So every time you say--

- [squeaks]

- Weird, huh?

- You look nothing like...her.

- Look.

I'm not saying I'm
who we are not talking about.

But I had this dream where
this goat god, Amber?

both: Ember.

- Whatevs.

Said I had to get here
quick and dirty.

- The reports are true.

Ember has indeed
returned to Fillory.

- Miraculously risen
from the dead.

- Look. If you know
where this Ember is--

- We don't, is the problem.

We don't want to find him.
We have to.

Something's happened
since his return.

- Oh, I'm nodding so you hurry

and you get to something
I actually understand.

- Oh.

Our air

has always been graced

with what you on Earth call

opium.

But now it's saturated.

For some it's tolerable.

Some get quite giddy,

a few succumb to sleep
at the most inconvenient times,

and then there are those who...

- Dance.

In the nude.

- It sounds lighthearted,

but it's actually resulted
in a number of deaths,

mainly in falling asleep
in the wrong place

at the wrong time.

- Trampled in the middle
of the road

being the most common.

Uh, however, a dancer
did die of exposure

on a glacier, though, uh,

by all accounts,
quite gracefully.

- Magic is now rationed.

And none of it is powerful
enough to reverse this.

And since it coincides
with Ember's return...

- His glorious resurrection
and divine rule!

- We hope.

We've come to believe

that this is his doing.

And perhaps if he could be told

of the damage it's causing,

he could be convinced
to reverse this.

- Guys.

I need to stress

how much I don't give a shit.

- Oh.

- But he's dodging you

and he wants me.

So let's find the fucker.

- Sassy.

- Hi.
- Hi!

Kim, sorry, I'm late.

- No, this won't take long.

I think I'm flunking out.

- Oh, first year nerves,
totally normal.

- No, no, no, I am literally
failing everything.

I mean, if I could
just pass one--

- And somebody told you
I have a cheating spell.

- Yes.

- Okay, I will hook you up
right now.

I'm trying not to freak.

- What's wrong?
- I can't tell you.

- Okay.
- I promised.

- Right.
- Dean Fogg is leaving. Shit!

Why did I just say that?

Because it's too much.

Why do I have to be
the only one who knows?

- Wait, he's leaving?
Why?

- Oh, believe me,
it is not his choice.

See, there's this
Hedge Witch, and she--

Dean Fogg, hi!
Sorry I'm late.

I will give you every
cheating spell I have

if you please don't
repeat this, okay?

Great. Thanks.
It's gonna be fine.

Oh, my God,
this is horrible.

So even after you're gone,

nothing about Marina
can go in the memoir?

- Write or breathe
a single word

and there will be blood
on your hands.

But the outstanding business
I'm attending to today

should be recorded
in minute detail.

Walter.

[chuckling] Walter.

You're the best drinking
companion I've ever had.

- Thanks.

I mean, we only drank
together twice.

- I'm a high-functioning
alcoholic, Walter.

We prefer to do
our serious drinking alone.

So that when we weep,
we can wallow in self-loathing

without embarrassment.

Did you get that, Todd?

- Fantastic.
- Excellent.

Walter, in my office bar

is an unopened bottle
of 1977 Hollcroft single malt

that I was going to drink
if I ever committed suicide.

Enjoy, my dear friend.

It's not your fault
I'm always broke, Ashley.

I'm a degenerate gambler
who can use magic

to alter the outcome
of any game.

But then I couldn't relive
the secret shame

I've held since I was
two years old.

What I crave most in the world

is the degradation of losing.

Thank you for every single
moment of that.

- You're $56 short.

- You're a cutthroat bookie.

- Gold.

- Magic has been a brutal
series of disappointments.

And after having
lived 40 timelines,

39 of which range
from the comically horrendous

to the apocalyptically absurd,

to find it was all
for nothing, well...

leaving this life
actually feels liberating.

Hold this, Todd. Thank you.
- Okay.

[blow lands]

- Tell Jennifer thank you
and goodbye.

I had an affair with his wife.

He behaved abominably.

Do you find all this
as cathartic as I do, Todd?

- I think you really hurt him.

- Well, back to my childhood.

I was raised by my grandmother,

the kindest, wisest person
I've ever known.

Of course I could never
tell her that

because all forms
of intimacy horrify me.

"All forms of intimacy
terrify the hell out of me."

[chuckling]

[knocking on door]
Yes?

Kim. What can I do for you?

- Look, I'm pretty sure
I shouldn't tell you this.

- Well, you probably shouldn't
have walked in and said that.

- [sighs] I don't think
that I belong here.

- As I said,
it would take some time.

And, I promise, you do.

- Right, and you're literally
the only one

that thinks that,
and you're leaving.

- Todd.

.

- Look, it's not his fault.

He's just upset.
I am too.

Anybody that knew would be.

- Please.

[sighs] I probably owe you
an explanation.

My life is mostly made up
of regrets.

I'm not looking
for contradiction or pity.

It's just a fact
I'm suddenly forced to face.

But of all my many regrets

the greatest is something
I did very recently

to some of the most maddeningly
millennial students

I ever had.

- What--

Were they gonna hit us?

- Advantage of being
the spell caster.

I'll never be able to correct
what I did to them.

But Kim,

one day you might.

- Me?

- You have no idea

what you're capable of.

I do.

- Okay, then if you want me
to help these students

can you tell me who they are?

- Their lives
were in grave danger.

I cast a spell that erased
their identities

and gave them new ones,

and now that same spell
has been cast on me.

- [exhales] Jesus.

I mean, isn't there
anything you can do?

- Well, if I reveal that
the spell can be reversed,

then someone would reverse
the spell on my students,

ensuring their deaths.

I will not allow
that to happen.

I have to do this.

I must accept this.

[door closes]

[melancholy music]

♪

[fabric tears]

- Ah, stubborn dude.

You got Plan B?

- B plans are for losers.

- Okay.

Uh, well, whatever happens,

thank you for trying.

I don't really know why

you're putting yourself out
so much for us, but...

it's pretty cool.

- Well, it's pretty
common knowledge

that I'm a very,
very good person

who lives to help others.

- [chuckles]

- Mm.

[coughing]
Oh.

- It's such a piece of shit.

- Hey. I like the artwork.

- Yep. Sure.

- You have to admit,
the characters? Us?

We're pretty complex.

- Oh, yeah, real complex.

Yeah, Isaac's big problem
is his dick is too big.

- Hey. It can be a problem.

Seriously.

It narrows the field

by a lot more than you think.

I've been on way
too many first dates

that end in urgent care, so...

- Gross.
- Look.

My life is pretty cool, so...

how do I know this other me

is gonna...

- Nail as many groupies?

- Whoa, hey, whoa, no.

That is not what Hansel
is about, okay?

- You know there's a chance
the real you

didn't bang your sister?

- Hey, no, that's--

she was my step sister, okay?

Step sister.

And we didn't know
till, till later.

- Mm.

- Too many stepdads.

- All right, well,
what about you?

What's your kink?

- Me? [scoffs]

No, see, I'm perfect.

Yeah, I catch drug dealers,
murderers,

arsonists, blackmailers, pimps.

I even stopped a girl
from giving herself

a coat-hanger abortion and
got her to Planned Parenthood.

You see, I...

I'm a hero.

- So why would you
give that up?

You sound awesome.

- I sound fake.

Which I am.

- Oh, like your thunder meat.

- All right, easy.

It's...it's a meat.

I don't know if it's thunder.

- We just never know
where his celestial,

newly-risen godliness
is going to pop up next.

From the brothel
in the Lower Meerskin,

Ember was then sighted
on the schooner

of the thin white duke
off Basher Island,

where there was a celebration
for three days and nights.

- Okay.

Well, so far, every sighting

he either gets
the party started

or he dives right into one

that's already jumping off.

- Ember has always
enjoyed his pleasures,

but this pace reeks
of self-destruction.

- Please.

One July 4th,

I bet I could snort
my bodyweight in coke.

This dude's an amateur.

Next.

- Landfall at
Shimmering Cliff Palace,

then an...orgy

at Sacred Sky Nunnery.

- Okay. That's almost
impressive.

So look, he's headed east.

If he keeps going,
what's the next hotspot?

- The Hare on the Ass.

- Seriously?

Whimsy.

I fucking hate it.

- So you found a whole
family of them, huh?

Mm.

What happened
to the mother pig?

[pig snorting]

Kill it.
[pig squeals]

- What?

- Enyalius won't come

without a sacrifice, silly.

Here.

Slit its belly open, please.

Entrails on the altar.

[pig snorting]

- No, I'm not, I'm not--

Look, I'm a person with a job

and a girlfriend and a life,

and I'm not your, your pal.
Or your playmate.

And I'm not scared of you
anymore.

So why don't you
just fucking kill me?

- I would never do that.

[bone snaps]

- Ah!

[screaming]

- [chuckling]

Hello, Etta.

[both chuckling]

- Oh, I suppose this is why
you summoned me.

- Thank you.

- Oh, and the answer is no.

Your new suit
is not finished yet.

- Oh, pity.

- You are usually
not this impatient.

Henry, would you like to see
the work in progress?

- Oh, yes.

- [chuckles] Okay.

- Ah.

Beautiful.

Of course.
[chuckles]

Damn it.
- What in the world?

- Magic ration.

My office had some
unexpected visitors today

who took a huge portion
of today's magic.

- Ah.
No worries.

Smell.

- [sniffs]

[crying]

I'm sorry.

That's my grandmother's
huckleberry pie.

- Wait, what?

What is it, Henry?

So why a comic book?

- Graphic novel, Etta.

Had a lot of characters
with detailed backstories.

And I could look at them.

So the glamour was
much easier to cast.

Doesn't matter now.

I'm about to live
a version of it.

Though, I'm assured,
one not quite as nice.

- Well, you seem
awfully sanguine.

- Fate's a fucker
that always wins.

- Okay, I've known you for 22--

well...23 years now.

And I've loved you dearly
every moment.

Fully aware that you can barely
stand yourself.

And that made me sad, but...

it also made you
my best customer. [chuckles]

- How so?

- Isn't it obvious?

Come on, the bespoke suits,

the hand-sewn shirts...

[sighs]

It's armor.

It's an armor
to keep the world away.

A disguise so that nobody

can see what a truly
loving heart you have.

- [chuckles]

[crickets chirping]

- You said if revealed
the spell can be reversed.

- Kim.

Don't.

[building rumbling]

- I'm one of them, aren't I?

You have to undo this
on all of us.

- And then what?

- And then we fight.

- I know I can't stop you.

But please, be more careful now

than you've ever been
in your life.

Well, lives.

Finally getting to be
your teacher...

[chuckles softly]

Has been an honor.

[somber music]

♪

[distant car horns]

- You're now the saddest loser
I ever buried.

Look.

- Marina.

- Hi, Dad.

.

[screw clatters]

- How's it going?

- Got it.

- Do you feel it?

- Stronger further up.

- My arm wouldn't even
fit in there.

- [straining]

- Go, little buddy.
Come on.

Come on, little buddy.

[gasps]

[footsteps echo]

- Hey. Hey, come on now.

Little narration.

- Fuck off.

Come on, little buddy.

[panting]

[phone ringing]

- Yes?

I realize that.

But these dossiers are private.

- [chuckling] Holy shit.

[hangs up phone]

[thudding footsteps]

[squish]

[gasps]

Sorry, little buddy.

- What happened?

What?

Did, did anyone ever tell you

you're kind of withholding,
you know?

Oh, come on.

You're not trying to
kill yourself again, are you?

- No.

Hey, is all of that chimney
stuff about you true?

- Never met one
I couldn't crack.

[pig grunting]

- Leg next?
- No, no, no, no, no.

Okay, I'm ready.
Whatever you want, okay?

[pig squealing]

Ah.

[bone snaps]

Oh.

- Time to die.
Yes it is.

Give me a little goodbye kiss.

Yes.

- Explains a lot
of weird shit, but...

I promised I'd keep everything
about him private.

- Okay. Yeah, and I'm trying
to save him.

So please.

How was that?
Was it good?

- Yeah.
- Can I have one?

- Oh, yes.
Of course.

- Thank you.

[magic shorting out]

- Magic's supposed to
stay on till 11:00.

- Spells take magic, right?

Which is rationed.
- Which sucks.

- And a spell like this would
take even more power

than a normal one, right?

I mean, six, seven,
eight people?

Plus whole lives?

- No. If you had any
interruption in the flow...

[glass shatters]

Wait. Magic's off.

- It's him.

It's the spell.

He told me that it would
try and kill us.

- Right, but without magic,
how...

Shit.

Maybe he actually finished it.

- Finished what?

- This thing he worked on
for years.

A perpetual battery.

- Come on.

- Pray a little harder, please.

- Is that suckling I smell?

- Enyalius?

- Well, fuck yeah it is.

- You know what's funny?

He sacrificed the pig.

He prayed.

And he's never heard of you.

- [grunting]

[groaning, laughs]

How dare you?

[grunting, growling]

[panting]

- I want it back.

Give it to me.

- Well, I have no idea
what "it" is

but I grant you permission

to search my ball sack
with your tongue.

- Fine.

I'll just take it.

- [screaming]

[groaning]

[screams, grunts]

[groaning]

[organs squelching]

[mysterious pulsating]

- Okay, so.

Remember, Fogg said be
really, really careful.

Because--

[energy bursts]
-[cries out]

[thud]

- Oh, my God.

Kim?

Kim.

No, no.

No, no, no.

Yeah, I need a medic.

Yeah, I think she's--

- [gasps]

- Sorry, prank.

Kim. Are you okay?

- Fine.

- No, see.

You kind of...

died.

.

- Well, maybe being un-killable
is my discipline.

- Yeah, that's not a thing.

- Hey.

How much juice do you think
this thing has?

- Well, it's perpetual.

- So...

it can be overloaded.

- I have no idea.

[energy bursts]

Oh, shit!

How is this a good idea?

- [gasps]

[breathing hard]

- Oh, God.

- [groaning]

- It's not in there!

You're not Enyalius, are you?

You're his servant.

A corybant.
Aren't you?

- All right, look, he's,
he's not who you want.

So just...

You know, let him go.

All right?

- [groaning]

- Why did your master
send you to trick me?

- He knows.

[horns, drums playing]

♪

- It's not even mid-day.

- Real ragers rave in the day.

Horn guy.
Is that him?

- Who is that?

- An imposter.

No wonder he won't see

anyone who knows him.

- Hey. Ember.

I'm here.

- Yeah, you are.

Congrats.

- Where are your hooves?

[energy bursts]

- [gasps]

[energy bursts, thud]

[gasps]

[energy bursts, thud]

[energy bursts, thud]

[energy bursts, thud]

[energy bursts, thud]

[energy bursts, thud]

[energy bursts, grunt]

[energy bursts, grunt]

[thud]

[energy sparks]

Todd.

[warbles]

[metallic clang]

[gasping]

[many distorted voices]

[crying]

- [grunts]

[many voices screaming]

[many distorted voices]

[dramatic music]

[many voices screaming]

- [grunting]

- Quentin. You're back.

- [exhales]

[body thuds]

Oh.

You wanted to play.

Sorry. He's too dead.

.

- Cool trick. Do it again.

[indistinct murmuring]

[all gasping softly]

- Okay, what the what now?

- What the fuck are you
doing here, Bacchus?

- [laughing] All right.

Have we banged?

- I followed you on Instagram.

Everybody did
till they kicked you off.

- Oh, I know, right? Dicks.

- Well.

That explains all the opium
in the air.

Nice touch, I like it.

- It's pretty sweet, right?

- Mm-hmm, all right, all right.

What are you doing here?

Why do you want everyone
thinking you're Ember?

- Hey, so, you really want
to go back to Earth, right?

- No, I want you to answer
my fucking question.

- Thanks for popping in.

[all gasping]

- Where is our High King?

- Who are you?

- A god

is all you need to know.

- I'm glad you're back,
Quentin.

I was getting a little tired
of the Brian game.

- Yeah, me too.

So maybe I missed something
when we were playing, but...

you had to torture him
to death.

Why, again?

- Gods are so tricky.

- Right.

But what about the one
that you were after today?

- Oh, we'll get him.

And I'll get back
what he took from me.

And then the others.

They all took.

- Took what, exactly?

- See, that's what I
don't really know.

They took this part of me

that knew things.

It's not fair.

- No, yeah, totally.

They owe you.

Got it.

- You really understand me,
Quentin.

It's good to have a friend
like you.

- You know,
speaking of friends,

when you get back

what the gods took from you...

maybe...

could I maybe have Eliot back?

- The one who tried to kill me?

- Hey, hey, no. No.
That was a mistake.

- You were there.
You...

like him more than me?

- No, I, I didn't say that.

- You miss him.

You...you miss
all your friends.

The...the ones in my castle

who tried to kill me.

Good.

[leaves rustling]

[fly zips]

- Huh.

Well, upsides and downsides.

- Yeah, no,
I remember everything.

Kind of like a dream.

- I was gonna say
acid trip myself.

Oh, my God.

- Mis hermanos.

- Where were you?
We looked everywhere.

- Stay back.
- Why?

- Because I'm not here to play.

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