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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:02:37,303 --> 00:02:37,967 Line up, please. 2 00:02:37,970 --> 00:02:41,704 Parking permits, locker rentals. Library fines over here. 3 00:02:41,708 --> 00:02:43,841 And please have the right change. I'm not a bank. 4 00:02:43,842 --> 00:02:47,743 Mrs. Stebbins. Mrs. Stebbins. It says see you immediately. 5 00:02:47,745 --> 00:02:48,577 I sent this weeks ago. 6 00:02:48,580 --> 00:02:51,580 Yeah, I know, I know. See, I've been sick in bed for two days, 7 00:02:51,582 --> 00:02:54,482 but as soon as I got it I raced right over. 8 00:02:54,484 --> 00:02:56,083 Well... 9 00:02:56,218 --> 00:02:58,584 Bailey, Harry. 10 00:02:59,188 --> 00:03:01,421 Bailey... 11 00:03:01,422 --> 00:03:05,456 Bailey. Harry Bailey. Bailey. 12 00:03:16,670 --> 00:03:20,238 You owe this university $156 in tuition fees. 13 00:03:20,240 --> 00:03:20,904 But I signed a note. 14 00:03:20,907 --> 00:03:22,939 It was due last week. Well, I'll sign another one. 15 00:03:22,942 --> 00:03:24,107 No, you won't. 16 00:03:24,109 --> 00:03:24,640 No, but look... 17 00:03:24,643 --> 00:03:29,578 In two weeks, I get my master's, then I'll be able to get a teaching credential. 18 00:03:29,581 --> 00:03:31,380 I'll teach and I'll pay you back. 19 00:03:31,381 --> 00:03:32,313 At the end of the week, that's all. 20 00:03:32,315 --> 00:03:35,816 No tuition, no credits, no grades, and no more classes. 21 00:03:35,818 --> 00:03:37,149 Well, look, I mean, I... 22 00:03:37,152 --> 00:03:37,750 Are you infectious? 23 00:03:37,753 --> 00:03:39,219 Just when I cough. You see, I really... 24 00:03:39,220 --> 00:03:40,052 Don't cough. 25 00:03:40,054 --> 00:03:41,786 No, I won't. But you really have to... 26 00:03:41,789 --> 00:03:43,722 Well, make sure. 27 00:03:53,198 --> 00:03:55,263 Hey, Harry, you busy? 28 00:03:55,267 --> 00:03:55,898 Hey, man. 29 00:03:55,900 --> 00:03:57,199 You want to go to the aquarium? 30 00:03:57,201 --> 00:03:59,968 We'll turn on and dig the fish like we used to. 31 00:03:59,969 --> 00:04:00,733 You got any money? 32 00:04:00,737 --> 00:04:01,602 No, I'm tapped out, man. 33 00:04:01,603 --> 00:04:04,603 You still owe me from the bail when you were busted, you know? 34 00:04:04,606 --> 00:04:08,040 Yeah, I know. I got that written down. 35 00:04:08,042 --> 00:04:08,673 Well, that's good. 36 00:04:08,676 --> 00:04:10,842 Hey, say, where have you been for the last couple of days, man? 37 00:04:10,844 --> 00:04:13,077 I've been looking for you. Hey, what's the rush? 38 00:04:13,079 --> 00:04:14,710 I'm late for Wilhunt's class. I got a test. 39 00:04:14,713 --> 00:04:17,480 That's too bad 'cause I met the grooviest spade chick 40 00:04:17,481 --> 00:04:19,780 who loves to ball intellectuals. Yeah? 41 00:04:19,783 --> 00:04:20,814 Yeah, I can set you up. 42 00:04:20,817 --> 00:04:21,548 I can't. I got no time. 43 00:04:21,552 --> 00:04:24,218 That's too bad. I mean, she even let me do it when I showed her my degree. 44 00:04:24,221 --> 00:04:27,088 Yeah, at last, a practical use for your diploma. I got to split. 45 00:04:27,090 --> 00:04:32,058 Come on, Harry, forget the test. We'll turn on. I'll call the chick. 46 00:04:32,061 --> 00:04:33,226 You'd learn more that way, anyway. 47 00:04:33,227 --> 00:04:34,392 I didn't come here to learn more, Nick. 48 00:04:34,395 --> 00:04:36,026 I came here to get my teaching credentials. 49 00:04:36,028 --> 00:04:38,327 Why, Harry? Jesus, why a teacher? 50 00:04:38,330 --> 00:04:38,861 Money, Nick! 51 00:04:38,864 --> 00:04:43,866 Money and power, and little girls to molest! It's a great life! 52 00:04:46,671 --> 00:04:48,102 Harry, you lied to me. 53 00:04:48,104 --> 00:04:50,370 You told me that you were going to be at the free-speech meeting. 54 00:04:50,372 --> 00:04:53,305 No, you lied to me. You said there was going to be free food. 55 00:04:53,308 --> 00:04:56,308 Harry, what happened? What's the matter with you? 56 00:04:56,311 --> 00:05:00,879 Harry, you used to be the great rebel. The great leader. 57 00:05:00,882 --> 00:05:03,048 Harry, what are you afraid of? 58 00:05:03,050 --> 00:05:03,847 Of being late for class. 59 00:05:03,850 --> 00:05:08,285 Harry, in six months from now, the entire military-industrial complex 60 00:05:08,287 --> 00:05:11,887 is going to have us in concentration camps in Arizona. 61 00:05:11,890 --> 00:05:13,422 Don't knock Arizona, Judy. It's a great state. 62 00:05:13,425 --> 00:05:19,327 They have the lowest incidence of lung cancer, homosexuality and crabs. 63 00:06:05,772 --> 00:06:07,304 Harry. 64 00:06:07,605 --> 00:06:08,069 God! 65 00:06:08,073 --> 00:06:11,274 You really scared me. I thought it was somebody from the SPCA. 66 00:06:11,276 --> 00:06:13,575 I've got such guilt about doing this. 67 00:06:13,578 --> 00:06:15,411 Do you have the test papers? 68 00:06:15,412 --> 00:06:16,344 I haven't finished them yet. 69 00:06:16,346 --> 00:06:18,445 Jan, I told Kasper he'd have them before lunch. You knew that. 70 00:06:18,449 --> 00:06:20,382 No test papers, no dinner for the rest of the week. 71 00:06:20,384 --> 00:06:26,286 I know. I know. It's just that I was kind of busy until late last night. 72 00:06:26,788 --> 00:06:27,753 I remember. 73 00:06:27,755 --> 00:06:28,653 I'll have 'em for you, Harry. 74 00:06:28,655 --> 00:06:30,554 I've only got a few more to correct. 75 00:06:30,557 --> 00:06:31,756 Have I ever failed you? 76 00:06:31,758 --> 00:06:34,791 Okay. Right. I'll come back. 77 00:06:34,794 --> 00:06:38,094 You don't have to worry about the SPCA. 78 00:06:38,297 --> 00:06:38,661 What? 79 00:06:38,664 --> 00:06:41,964 Your patient just jumped off the table. 80 00:07:06,854 --> 00:07:09,253 Which poem is that? 81 00:07:25,606 --> 00:07:28,038 Well, Mr. Bailey, nice of you to drop by. 82 00:07:28,040 --> 00:07:29,705 I'd be interested to know how you do 83 00:07:29,709 --> 00:07:34,610 in this test in the next 20 minutes. 84 00:07:35,580 --> 00:07:37,379 When you've completed your test papers, 85 00:07:37,380 --> 00:07:38,411 turn them down, raise your hand 86 00:07:38,414 --> 00:07:39,579 and the monitors will pick them up. 87 00:07:39,582 --> 00:07:41,347 Be sure to mark them clearly... You're going to get an A, 88 00:07:41,349 --> 00:07:44,615 bring up the curve and make it hard for the rest of us. 89 00:07:44,618 --> 00:07:48,820 Don't worry, they're gonna need a lot of teachers. 90 00:07:48,822 --> 00:07:49,687 Are you kidding? 91 00:07:49,690 --> 00:07:51,321 Who wants to be a teacher? 92 00:07:51,324 --> 00:07:52,489 I thought you did. 93 00:07:52,491 --> 00:07:54,357 Don't be ridiculous. 94 00:07:55,727 --> 00:07:58,260 Do you know how much a teacher makes in this state? 95 00:07:58,261 --> 00:08:01,362 Yeah, more than a secretary, and less than a hooker. 96 00:08:01,365 --> 00:08:04,098 Someplace in between there. 97 00:08:07,571 --> 00:08:11,339 I trust your grade will not reflect your lack of attention. 98 00:08:11,340 --> 00:08:13,840 Of course, for those who allow their averages to drop, 99 00:08:13,842 --> 00:08:16,842 I wouldn't be too concerned. Mr. Bailey. 100 00:08:16,845 --> 00:08:22,714 I'm told that South Vietnam is very pleasant this time of year. 101 00:08:22,917 --> 00:08:23,948 Not really, Dr. Wilhunt. 102 00:08:23,951 --> 00:08:25,850 You see, it's the rainy season. 103 00:08:25,852 --> 00:08:29,620 And on the Mekong Delta we used to get these fantastic mudslides 104 00:08:29,623 --> 00:08:33,690 that used to wash down and open up all the shallow graves. 105 00:08:33,692 --> 00:08:35,023 So, if you really want to enjoy yourself 106 00:08:35,026 --> 00:08:37,893 I would go in the late summertime. 107 00:08:40,364 --> 00:08:43,598 I'll see you in my office at 11:00. 108 00:08:43,600 --> 00:08:47,068 See if you can make it promptly at 11:00. 109 00:09:02,518 --> 00:09:04,117 Hey, Harry, wait a minute. 110 00:09:04,119 --> 00:09:04,850 I can't. I'm late. 111 00:09:04,853 --> 00:09:06,618 Okay, I got your book. I'll get it later. 112 00:09:06,620 --> 00:09:08,419 Hey, come on, man. Hey, the book's here. 113 00:09:08,422 --> 00:09:11,523 I read it and we're drafting the constitution tonight. 114 00:09:11,524 --> 00:09:13,189 Great. 115 00:09:13,792 --> 00:09:15,157 Hey, now, wait. Now, wait, wait, wait. 116 00:09:15,161 --> 00:09:17,427 Look, I hear you were pretty active in the movement 117 00:09:17,429 --> 00:09:18,860 back in the "ban the bomb" days. 118 00:09:18,863 --> 00:09:20,329 We could really use you there tonight. 119 00:09:20,330 --> 00:09:21,761 Yeah, look, I'd love to, but I got 120 00:09:21,765 --> 00:09:23,497 about 500 years of English lit 121 00:09:23,499 --> 00:09:24,431 to read before Friday morning. 122 00:09:24,433 --> 00:09:25,698 Yeah, man, look, we got 300 years 123 00:09:25,701 --> 00:09:28,133 of being treated like a bunch of puke. 124 00:09:28,135 --> 00:09:29,067 Now, Harry, look, we've got to have 125 00:09:29,069 --> 00:09:30,568 a Black Studies Department on this campus, 126 00:09:30,571 --> 00:09:32,804 and you can't give us an hour of your time? 127 00:09:32,806 --> 00:09:33,638 Sorry, I can't. Not this week. 128 00:09:33,639 --> 00:09:36,338 Yeah, you remember, baby, without us, you ain't got no causes. 129 00:09:36,342 --> 00:09:37,673 You just got a bunch of bored white kids 130 00:09:37,676 --> 00:09:40,676 trying to solve their acne problem with their old man's money. 131 00:09:40,679 --> 00:09:42,845 Without us, you don't have a social revolution. 132 00:09:42,847 --> 00:09:46,181 That's terrific, Ellis, I like things just the way they are. 133 00:09:46,184 --> 00:09:48,816 I mean, I got 18 cents in my pocket, you know that? 134 00:09:48,819 --> 00:09:51,419 18 cents. My car runs on one gear. 135 00:09:51,421 --> 00:09:52,720 I'm probably going to flunk out 136 00:09:52,722 --> 00:09:54,955 and the last meal I had was yesterday morning. 137 00:09:54,957 --> 00:09:57,724 So good luck with your race. I've got my own to run. 138 00:09:57,725 --> 00:09:58,489 Hey, Harry, look. 139 00:09:58,493 --> 00:10:00,025 Now, that's cop-out time, Harry. 140 00:10:00,026 --> 00:10:01,758 That's cop-out time. I know where your head's at. 141 00:10:01,762 --> 00:10:04,128 I know you do. And I know where your head's at. 142 00:10:04,130 --> 00:10:07,430 I've been watching it for the last five minutes. 143 00:10:07,433 --> 00:10:10,333 Hey, man, you don't have to worry about that. 144 00:10:10,335 --> 00:10:12,501 I don't want to marry your sister. 145 00:10:12,504 --> 00:10:13,970 You, marry my sister? 146 00:10:13,971 --> 00:10:16,137 Ellis, I will arrange it for you, man! 147 00:10:16,140 --> 00:10:20,708 With the analyst and the astrologist and the two neurotic kids 148 00:10:20,711 --> 00:10:22,010 and the payments on the pool. 149 00:10:22,012 --> 00:10:23,478 And the bill for the hysterectomy. 150 00:10:23,479 --> 00:10:27,713 You can be husband number four she wipes out. 151 00:10:30,919 --> 00:10:32,951 Stop trying to join up, will you? 152 00:10:32,955 --> 00:10:34,888 You gotta be better than we are! 153 00:10:34,890 --> 00:10:38,156 Hey, we already are in certain areas. 154 00:10:38,159 --> 00:10:38,823 Yeah, I notice. 155 00:10:38,826 --> 00:10:40,858 How come that's the only stereotype 156 00:10:40,861 --> 00:10:43,127 none of you ever bother to deny? 157 00:11:15,527 --> 00:11:19,295 Dr. Wilhunt, I was just on my way. 158 00:11:36,680 --> 00:11:39,980 Listen, I'll try turning on the water. Sometimes it helps. 159 00:11:39,983 --> 00:11:42,516 You know, Mr. Bailey, it happens every year in my class. 160 00:11:42,518 --> 00:11:46,485 There's always one dedicated know-it-all who feels called upon 161 00:11:46,488 --> 00:11:49,788 to criticize the teaching practices of this department, 162 00:11:49,792 --> 00:11:53,793 who's just got to save the youth and change the system. 163 00:11:53,796 --> 00:11:57,096 This year the smart-ass is you. 164 00:12:05,573 --> 00:12:08,272 Why are you doing so poorly, Harry? 165 00:12:08,275 --> 00:12:10,508 I thought I was doing fine. 166 00:12:10,510 --> 00:12:12,942 If this machine gives me a good grade on today's test, 167 00:12:12,946 --> 00:12:18,149 I'll have a three-point average, even with the absences. 168 00:12:21,319 --> 00:12:23,351 You here speak to the machine, you see. 169 00:12:23,355 --> 00:12:25,888 But I have been getting damn good grades. 170 00:12:25,890 --> 00:12:26,921 I have my own yardstick. 171 00:12:26,924 --> 00:12:29,124 Considering I should get the best average. 172 00:12:29,125 --> 00:12:33,092 Now, let me describe it from my perspective. 173 00:12:33,096 --> 00:12:34,761 Attitude and discipline are also part 174 00:12:34,764 --> 00:12:37,598 of this course and yours are rotten. 175 00:12:47,142 --> 00:12:49,942 Do you really want to be a teacher, Harry? 176 00:12:50,444 --> 00:12:52,944 Yes, I do. Very much. 177 00:12:52,946 --> 00:12:58,181 Well, that's nice. That's interesting. I suppose you do. 178 00:12:58,184 --> 00:13:03,921 Returning to school after a six-year absence. 179 00:13:03,922 --> 00:13:11,159 It might be interpreted as some sort of dedication. 180 00:13:12,464 --> 00:13:15,965 Why do you want to be a teacher, Harry? 181 00:13:15,966 --> 00:13:18,232 I mean, really. 182 00:13:19,768 --> 00:13:21,234 Well, I think it's very important. 183 00:13:21,237 --> 00:13:24,805 Well, we all do, but what else? 184 00:13:28,143 --> 00:13:32,612 Well, look, if people are smart enough to build this... 185 00:13:32,614 --> 00:13:33,712 This concrete erection, you know what I mean? 186 00:13:33,715 --> 00:13:36,781 They got to be smart enough to finally learn how to live in it. 187 00:13:36,783 --> 00:13:38,782 Yeah, I know what you mean. You come into a classroom, 188 00:13:38,785 --> 00:13:42,752 and there on the fourth row is a boy, and you read his composition, 189 00:13:42,756 --> 00:13:44,922 "How I Spent My Summer Vacation," 190 00:13:44,923 --> 00:13:46,922 and suddenly you realize that, 191 00:13:46,925 --> 00:13:51,226 in 10 years, with a little help, a little push, 192 00:13:51,230 --> 00:13:56,032 perhaps another Salinger. That's it, isn't it? 193 00:13:58,036 --> 00:13:58,400 Okay. 194 00:13:58,403 --> 00:14:00,202 And what about the other 35 boys, Harry? 195 00:14:00,203 --> 00:14:02,803 What about the other 175 boys and girls 196 00:14:02,805 --> 00:14:06,573 you're going to see the rest of the day in the other English classes? 197 00:14:06,576 --> 00:14:09,842 The green dots, Harry. The mean. 198 00:14:09,845 --> 00:14:13,212 You're talking about the red dots. The special ones. 199 00:14:13,214 --> 00:14:14,245 With a passing thought to the blues. 200 00:14:14,248 --> 00:14:21,552 But what about the green, and what about the little gray ones? 201 00:14:21,923 --> 00:14:27,859 Since I've been head of this department, 202 00:14:28,194 --> 00:14:30,394 15,000 teachers have gone on 203 00:14:30,396 --> 00:14:35,731 to teach over a million elementary and secondary students. 204 00:14:35,734 --> 00:14:37,132 To do what? 205 00:14:40,071 --> 00:14:41,970 To write letters home, 206 00:14:41,972 --> 00:14:46,140 to balance checkbooks, to function on a day-to-day basis. 207 00:14:46,141 --> 00:14:48,206 Robots can function, too. 208 00:14:58,218 --> 00:15:01,218 Here, see if you can handle this. There. 209 00:15:01,221 --> 00:15:06,489 Now, this is a state-supported university, Harry. 210 00:15:06,492 --> 00:15:08,457 We graduate taxpayers. 211 00:15:08,460 --> 00:15:11,426 A Salinger doesn't need you. He can make it on his own. 212 00:15:11,428 --> 00:15:16,931 Our job is to educate the population of the state. 213 00:15:16,933 --> 00:15:17,931 Now, what do you want to do? 214 00:15:17,934 --> 00:15:21,567 I just don't want to see another generation whose horizons 215 00:15:21,570 --> 00:15:24,437 are limited to balancing their checkbooks. 216 00:15:25,674 --> 00:15:29,341 Harry, for the last time, stop trying to inject morality 217 00:15:29,343 --> 00:15:34,179 and ethics and sociology into the teaching of English grammar. 218 00:15:34,182 --> 00:15:36,081 You're going to flunk me, aren't you? 219 00:15:36,083 --> 00:15:38,883 You're very close. We'll see. 220 00:15:38,884 --> 00:15:43,086 I've been thinking of practice teaching assignments. 221 00:15:43,088 --> 00:15:46,522 Yours will be in subject A, right here on campus. 222 00:15:46,525 --> 00:15:51,027 You might start with the 12:00 in Building B. 223 00:15:51,029 --> 00:15:52,027 Convenient? 224 00:15:52,030 --> 00:15:53,262 Dumbbell English? 225 00:15:53,264 --> 00:15:55,896 We don't refer to subject A by that name. 226 00:15:55,899 --> 00:15:59,467 The gray dot by any other name. 227 00:16:02,571 --> 00:16:04,170 Dr. Wilhunt! 228 00:16:04,339 --> 00:16:05,737 Hmm? 229 00:16:08,209 --> 00:16:09,508 I got an A. 230 00:16:09,510 --> 00:16:14,512 Well, Harry, that's better than a D, I guess, isn't it? 231 00:16:33,499 --> 00:16:37,500 All right, I think we should spend some... 232 00:16:43,208 --> 00:16:45,307 Okay, let's see if you can... 233 00:16:49,446 --> 00:16:51,478 Let's see if you can conjugate... 234 00:16:54,417 --> 00:17:00,620 Okay, okay, let's see if you can conjugate the irregular verb "to be." 235 00:17:02,091 --> 00:17:03,924 Mr. Haji. 236 00:17:06,395 --> 00:17:09,195 I be, you be, he be. 237 00:17:13,302 --> 00:17:17,470 Most verbs have been given a common form for the first, 238 00:17:17,471 --> 00:17:21,405 second and third person, but "to be" 239 00:17:21,408 --> 00:17:23,507 is used so much in everyday speech 240 00:17:23,511 --> 00:17:25,943 that it retains individual forms, 241 00:17:25,945 --> 00:17:30,613 such as, "I am, he is and you are." 242 00:17:30,617 --> 00:17:32,916 That's terrific. 243 00:17:32,919 --> 00:17:34,218 Okay. I think it would be easier 244 00:17:34,220 --> 00:17:36,053 if we tried to use it in a sentence. 245 00:17:36,054 --> 00:17:37,819 Now, who can give me a sentence using 246 00:17:37,823 --> 00:17:42,491 the past tense of the verb "to be"? 247 00:17:43,527 --> 00:17:45,326 Mr. Garcia. 248 00:17:52,635 --> 00:17:54,534 Mr. Garcia? 249 00:17:57,673 --> 00:17:58,972 I didn't get that far. 250 00:17:58,974 --> 00:18:01,606 Well, could you stand up, please? 251 00:18:05,512 --> 00:18:11,081 I didn't get that far in senior English in high school. 252 00:18:14,052 --> 00:18:20,355 On account of football come in six period. 253 00:18:20,692 --> 00:18:25,026 And though they promised me, 254 00:18:25,629 --> 00:18:28,129 I didn't get no credit for the course. 255 00:18:30,398 --> 00:18:32,297 So, you see, 256 00:18:33,900 --> 00:18:34,798 I was kind of shafted. 257 00:18:34,801 --> 00:18:37,601 You were what? 258 00:18:37,802 --> 00:18:41,670 Well, I... I said, 259 00:18:45,109 --> 00:18:45,806 I was shafted. 260 00:18:45,809 --> 00:18:49,176 That's right. That's correct. 261 00:18:49,178 --> 00:18:51,011 That's very good. 262 00:18:51,014 --> 00:18:55,182 "I was shafted." 263 00:18:56,050 --> 00:19:02,087 The past tense, first person of the verb "to be." I was. 264 00:19:02,090 --> 00:19:03,355 That's very good, Garcia. Now, 265 00:19:03,357 --> 00:19:05,557 how would you use the same sentence... 266 00:19:05,558 --> 00:19:08,091 Now, how would you use the same sentence 267 00:19:08,093 --> 00:19:11,460 in the second person singular? 268 00:19:11,464 --> 00:19:14,364 The girl who came in late, what's your name? 269 00:19:14,365 --> 00:19:15,429 Sheila Rohl. 270 00:19:15,433 --> 00:19:16,831 Sheila Rohl. 271 00:19:16,833 --> 00:19:19,499 You were shafted. 272 00:19:19,502 --> 00:19:22,502 Yeah, when they gave you this class. 273 00:19:24,241 --> 00:19:26,340 Third person singular. 274 00:19:26,342 --> 00:19:28,407 She was shafted. 275 00:19:28,411 --> 00:19:32,445 Nice going, Haji. That's great. Now look... 276 00:19:32,748 --> 00:19:36,348 So, you see, the verb "to be" is only irregular 277 00:19:36,351 --> 00:19:38,250 in the first and third person singular. 278 00:19:38,252 --> 00:19:40,418 In the plural, "We were shafted, 279 00:19:40,419 --> 00:19:42,652 "you were shafted, they were shafted." 280 00:19:42,654 --> 00:19:45,154 We all get shafted the same, right? 281 00:19:45,156 --> 00:19:46,487 We never learned that in high school English. 282 00:19:46,490 --> 00:19:50,524 Well, what do high school teachers know about fancy shafting? 283 00:19:51,195 --> 00:19:54,795 Look, don't forget about the book-report assignment. 284 00:20:19,687 --> 00:20:21,719 Hi. Hi. 285 00:20:22,289 --> 00:20:24,388 Hey, I really like you. 286 00:20:26,226 --> 00:20:27,825 Oh, no, I don't want you to think I'm saying 287 00:20:27,827 --> 00:20:30,060 that 'cause I want to get a good grade. 288 00:20:30,063 --> 00:20:34,731 Well, do you think you could like somebody from dumbbell English? 289 00:20:36,634 --> 00:20:37,466 Well, I'll tell you something. 290 00:20:37,469 --> 00:20:41,571 You know, there are two basic rules for the wise teacher. 291 00:20:41,572 --> 00:20:44,939 One is that the wise teacher never neglects 292 00:20:44,943 --> 00:20:47,076 the dull student for the bright one. 293 00:20:47,077 --> 00:20:49,544 And the other one is that the wise teacher 294 00:20:49,547 --> 00:20:52,947 never comes on with a pretty... 295 00:20:52,949 --> 00:20:55,450 Well, he never tries to make out... Well, I don't... 296 00:20:55,453 --> 00:20:58,620 I forget it, but I know he doesn't do it the first week of class. 297 00:20:58,622 --> 00:20:59,220 I remember that. 298 00:20:59,222 --> 00:21:01,187 Well, then, in the meantime, maybe you could suggest 299 00:21:01,190 --> 00:21:02,955 a book for me to make a report on. 300 00:21:02,957 --> 00:21:04,922 Oh, sure. When I get in the library, 301 00:21:04,925 --> 00:21:06,491 I see so many books I get confused. 302 00:21:06,494 --> 00:21:08,826 I just wander around for hours. 303 00:21:08,828 --> 00:21:09,826 I know. I know, I know. 304 00:21:09,829 --> 00:21:13,697 I had an aunt who used to have the same problem. 305 00:21:13,699 --> 00:21:15,532 But I think you'll like this book. 306 00:21:15,535 --> 00:21:20,037 This is quite a popular book. 307 00:21:20,706 --> 00:21:27,876 The Complete, Unexpurgated Works of the Marquis de Sade. 308 00:21:27,879 --> 00:21:29,544 No, it's the Marquis de Sade. 309 00:21:29,547 --> 00:21:32,080 You see, he was a Frenchman. 310 00:21:32,082 --> 00:21:34,481 He was a pervert. 311 00:21:34,717 --> 00:21:36,148 My high school English teacher 312 00:21:36,150 --> 00:21:39,083 already tried to turn me on with that. 313 00:21:40,787 --> 00:21:43,086 See you tomorrow. 314 00:21:43,422 --> 00:21:45,021 And so thousands of sperm 315 00:21:45,023 --> 00:21:47,455 fight their way up the vaginal canal toward the ovum. 316 00:21:47,459 --> 00:21:50,459 How did they get in the canal, Daddy? 317 00:21:50,462 --> 00:21:51,793 Tell me that part. 318 00:21:54,298 --> 00:21:57,564 ...in a follicle in the ovary. 319 00:21:58,768 --> 00:22:00,733 Hi, do you have the papers? 320 00:22:00,736 --> 00:22:02,401 30 C's, 6 B's and 3 A's. 321 00:22:02,404 --> 00:22:05,204 Oh, honey, Dr. Kasper's going to know I didn't grade these. 322 00:22:05,205 --> 00:22:07,038 It doesn't look good without any D's or F's. 323 00:22:07,041 --> 00:22:08,340 ...is drawn into the fallopian tube... 324 00:22:08,342 --> 00:22:10,141 Okay, next time, I'll give the girls D's and F's. 325 00:22:10,142 --> 00:22:12,275 At least if they flunk out they can get married. 326 00:22:12,277 --> 00:22:13,809 They won't have to get drafted. 327 00:22:13,812 --> 00:22:16,878 The healthiest and strongest of the sperm reach the ovum. 328 00:22:16,880 --> 00:22:21,848 And remember, it takes only one sperm to conceive. 329 00:22:21,851 --> 00:22:23,182 Back, back, you fools! 330 00:22:23,186 --> 00:22:25,953 We've been tricked! It's only a wet dream. 331 00:22:27,222 --> 00:22:29,654 I'll see you at 9:00. 332 00:22:31,224 --> 00:22:32,222 Can you make it 8:30? 333 00:22:32,225 --> 00:22:33,356 The movie starts at 9:00. 334 00:22:33,360 --> 00:22:34,725 Look, honey, would you mind if we just 335 00:22:34,728 --> 00:22:36,294 skipped the movie and go to your place? 336 00:22:36,296 --> 00:22:39,764 I got an exam. I have to study. 337 00:22:39,765 --> 00:22:42,031 I've got my period. 338 00:22:43,502 --> 00:22:44,400 No, you don't. 339 00:22:44,402 --> 00:22:46,134 Boy, you really count, don't you? 340 00:22:46,136 --> 00:22:47,134 Yeah, I count. 341 00:22:47,137 --> 00:22:48,636 Look, darling, I need you. 342 00:22:48,639 --> 00:22:51,305 Sexual repression breeds violence. 343 00:22:51,308 --> 00:22:51,839 Am I not right? 344 00:22:51,841 --> 00:22:53,640 I mean, look at Vietnam and Korea, Canada. 345 00:22:53,641 --> 00:22:55,006 You're right. 7:30. Come at 7:30. 346 00:22:55,009 --> 00:22:56,308 The door will be open. I'll be ready. 347 00:22:56,310 --> 00:22:59,144 It's the least I can do to prevent World War III. 348 00:22:59,146 --> 00:23:00,945 Right. 349 00:23:03,550 --> 00:23:05,515 She's getting better. 350 00:23:05,518 --> 00:23:06,916 Whose paper's that? 351 00:23:06,919 --> 00:23:10,086 No, not the student. I mean Jan. 352 00:23:10,287 --> 00:23:11,718 Jan? I'm getting on in years, 353 00:23:11,722 --> 00:23:15,590 I know, and my eyesight's not what it used to be, 354 00:23:15,592 --> 00:23:17,657 but I can still tell the difference between 355 00:23:17,660 --> 00:23:20,827 one of your pupils and one of mine. 356 00:23:20,829 --> 00:23:23,261 I do hope she wasn't too harsh on the poor little darlings. 357 00:23:23,263 --> 00:23:24,661 No. She's been overly generous. 358 00:23:24,664 --> 00:23:26,597 Can I use some of that hot water? 359 00:23:26,599 --> 00:23:29,499 Fire away. Help yourself. 360 00:23:30,201 --> 00:23:34,135 You know, Harry, I worry about you. 361 00:23:35,372 --> 00:23:38,705 How are you going to survive teaching in high school 362 00:23:38,709 --> 00:23:40,074 where the pupils are really stupid? 363 00:23:40,077 --> 00:23:43,945 I know. Wilhunt says I'd make a lousy high school teacher, too. 364 00:23:43,947 --> 00:23:46,613 No, you'll probably make a wonderful high school teacher. 365 00:23:46,616 --> 00:23:51,819 And you'd probably make an excellent shoe salesman, too. 366 00:23:51,821 --> 00:23:53,654 But what a waste, Harry. 367 00:23:53,655 --> 00:23:54,854 You belong here, my boy. 368 00:23:54,856 --> 00:23:57,623 I'm going to get you a fellowship in the English Department. 369 00:23:57,626 --> 00:23:59,625 Thanks, but I couldn't make another four years. 370 00:23:59,628 --> 00:24:04,196 In four years I'll be to these kids like Wilhunt is to me. 371 00:24:04,199 --> 00:24:06,498 It could just kill the very thing that might 372 00:24:06,501 --> 00:24:08,867 make me a really good teacher now. 373 00:24:08,869 --> 00:24:09,834 You know what I mean? 374 00:24:09,836 --> 00:24:11,835 Is that the way you see us, Harry? 375 00:24:11,838 --> 00:24:15,706 Men in eggshells suspended in time? 376 00:24:16,008 --> 00:24:16,539 $10? 377 00:24:16,542 --> 00:24:18,141 Harry, I'm doing you a favor. 378 00:24:18,143 --> 00:24:19,841 We sell books this time of year. 379 00:24:19,844 --> 00:24:20,608 We don't buy them. 380 00:24:20,610 --> 00:24:23,042 Yeah, but I gotta pay my rent. 381 00:24:23,046 --> 00:24:26,814 All right, okay, fine. $10. Come on, give me. 382 00:24:28,850 --> 00:24:29,848 Where are the books? 383 00:24:29,851 --> 00:24:31,916 Well, I'll bring them next week after finals. 384 00:24:31,918 --> 00:24:33,384 Harry, for goodness sake. 385 00:24:33,387 --> 00:24:35,186 I need them to study. 386 00:24:35,187 --> 00:24:39,022 Okay, fine. All right. I'll go get 'em now. 387 00:25:35,310 --> 00:25:40,645 If you break that, a new lock will cost you $12, Mr. Bailey. 388 00:25:40,647 --> 00:25:41,978 It's stuck. 389 00:25:41,981 --> 00:25:43,280 It's locked. 390 00:25:43,282 --> 00:25:44,680 That's ridiculous. 391 00:25:44,684 --> 00:25:46,349 Four weeks rent. 392 00:25:46,352 --> 00:25:47,651 Mrs. Kuntz, let me get my books. 393 00:25:47,653 --> 00:25:50,085 I was just going to sell them. 394 00:25:50,087 --> 00:25:51,619 You heard that one before. 395 00:25:51,622 --> 00:25:52,153 Come on, Harry. 396 00:25:52,155 --> 00:25:56,489 What about kindness, and human compassion, and mercy? 397 00:25:56,492 --> 00:25:58,891 How's about if I leave you my clothes? 398 00:25:58,893 --> 00:26:01,460 I've already got 'em. 399 00:26:01,462 --> 00:26:02,394 What's this? 400 00:26:02,397 --> 00:26:04,462 I only kept the clean ones. 401 00:26:04,797 --> 00:26:05,996 That's insane! 402 00:26:05,998 --> 00:26:08,164 Mrs. Kuntz, four weeks rent, $68... 403 00:26:08,167 --> 00:26:09,932 Look, let me take my books. If I don't come back, 404 00:26:09,934 --> 00:26:12,134 my jackets alone are worth more than that. 405 00:26:12,137 --> 00:26:14,303 I don't think so, Harry. 406 00:26:14,305 --> 00:26:16,438 You have very short arms. 407 00:26:59,778 --> 00:27:01,577 Harry! 408 00:27:04,715 --> 00:27:06,981 You're beautiful. 409 00:27:07,583 --> 00:27:09,014 No, I got short arms. 410 00:27:09,018 --> 00:27:13,220 Yeah, but you've got an awfully long tongue. 411 00:27:13,322 --> 00:27:16,322 How long are you going to stay? 412 00:27:17,358 --> 00:27:20,691 I don't know. Two or three days. 413 00:27:23,097 --> 00:27:23,662 Harry. 414 00:27:23,664 --> 00:27:26,898 I think there's something you ought to know. 415 00:27:26,900 --> 00:27:28,432 You're what? 416 00:27:28,433 --> 00:27:30,465 I'm pregnant. 417 00:27:34,205 --> 00:27:35,203 It's good. 418 00:27:35,206 --> 00:27:37,072 That is great. It's just what I need. 419 00:27:37,075 --> 00:27:41,210 How could you be pregnant when you take pills? 420 00:27:44,380 --> 00:27:46,045 Okay, so I'm not pregnant. 421 00:27:46,048 --> 00:27:47,112 "Okay, so I'm not pregnant." 422 00:27:47,116 --> 00:27:48,682 Then why'd you tell me you were pregnant for? 423 00:27:48,684 --> 00:27:51,116 To see if you'd act exactly like you're acting. 424 00:27:51,118 --> 00:27:52,283 Boy, I'm gonna tell you something. 425 00:27:52,286 --> 00:27:55,387 You are not worth the pain, baby. 426 00:27:59,826 --> 00:28:00,724 Harry, I'm sorry. 427 00:28:00,726 --> 00:28:02,959 I'm sorry. That was a rotten thing to do. 428 00:28:02,960 --> 00:28:05,693 I didn't mean to do that. 429 00:28:06,229 --> 00:28:07,293 Yeah, okay. Me, too. 430 00:28:07,297 --> 00:28:09,996 It's just that once in a while, I wish 431 00:28:09,998 --> 00:28:12,565 you'd buy me a bag of popcorn, you know? 432 00:28:12,568 --> 00:28:13,933 Make me feel like a date. 433 00:28:13,935 --> 00:28:16,435 Oh, Christ, Jan. 434 00:28:16,438 --> 00:28:18,671 I'm sorry, that's just the way I feel. 435 00:28:18,673 --> 00:28:19,238 Look, I told you. 436 00:28:19,239 --> 00:28:21,938 You gotta be patient. Two weeks. Just... You gotta wait. 437 00:28:21,942 --> 00:28:24,542 Look, Jan, in two weeks, I will have clawed 438 00:28:24,544 --> 00:28:25,542 my way through all of this crap, 439 00:28:25,545 --> 00:28:30,714 and then I will buy you a popcorn machine. Okay? 440 00:28:30,915 --> 00:28:33,148 With melted butter? 441 00:28:33,216 --> 00:28:35,449 Sweet or salty? 442 00:28:36,319 --> 00:28:37,317 Where are we going? 443 00:28:37,320 --> 00:28:38,051 We're going to the library. 444 00:28:38,053 --> 00:28:42,387 I got an exam and I'm practice-teaching again. 445 00:28:44,793 --> 00:28:46,993 Oh, Christ, I got nothing clean to wear. 446 00:28:46,995 --> 00:28:49,394 Look, could you do me a... 447 00:28:49,396 --> 00:28:51,662 Never mind, I'll do it myself. 448 00:28:51,664 --> 00:28:52,094 What? 449 00:28:52,097 --> 00:28:53,795 Well, would you put these into the machine for me, 450 00:28:53,799 --> 00:28:57,233 so that they'll be dry by the time I leave in the morning? 451 00:28:57,234 --> 00:28:58,932 But don't put my sport shirts in with 452 00:28:58,935 --> 00:29:02,069 the underwear because then they'll run. 453 00:29:02,072 --> 00:29:03,238 Harry, I know that. 454 00:29:03,240 --> 00:29:05,773 Do you want the underwear ironed? 455 00:29:05,774 --> 00:29:08,840 Well, you don't have to do the T-shirts, 456 00:29:08,844 --> 00:29:12,177 but I would like it if you did the shorts. 457 00:29:14,514 --> 00:29:16,479 What's the matter? 458 00:29:16,482 --> 00:29:16,879 Nothing. 459 00:29:16,882 --> 00:29:18,448 Come on, come on. What's the matter? 460 00:29:18,450 --> 00:29:19,848 Well, what do you expect? 461 00:29:19,852 --> 00:29:22,385 I mean, for months, I have been living alone here. 462 00:29:22,386 --> 00:29:24,752 And now, just because it's convenient, 463 00:29:24,756 --> 00:29:26,322 you announce you're moving in, 464 00:29:26,323 --> 00:29:29,424 you empty my icebox, you pull me into bed, 465 00:29:29,426 --> 00:29:31,758 and now you want me to do your laundry. 466 00:29:31,761 --> 00:29:33,594 You know, you're doing it again. 467 00:29:33,597 --> 00:29:37,098 No, Harry, you're doing it again. 468 00:29:37,100 --> 00:29:39,333 I mean, what do you think I am, anyway? 469 00:29:39,334 --> 00:29:46,038 I don't know, baby, but I know what you were when I met you! 470 00:29:46,241 --> 00:29:48,741 Yeah, a lot happier! 471 00:29:48,742 --> 00:29:49,907 Yeah, right. That's right. 472 00:29:49,910 --> 00:29:50,641 It's Miss Homecoming Queen. 473 00:29:50,643 --> 00:29:54,778 Miss Kiss-the-Boys-Good-Night on the front porch and let them feel you up, 474 00:29:54,781 --> 00:29:57,014 maybe on the third date, if they were lucky. 475 00:29:57,016 --> 00:30:01,485 I dropped out of that lunacy long before I met you. 476 00:30:01,487 --> 00:30:03,185 Yeah. Two weeks before. 477 00:30:03,188 --> 00:30:05,388 And only when the Campus Crusade 478 00:30:05,390 --> 00:30:07,088 for Christ tried to convert you 479 00:30:07,091 --> 00:30:09,723 because of a sexual indiscretion. 480 00:30:09,726 --> 00:30:11,391 Which I didn't commit. 481 00:30:11,394 --> 00:30:13,693 Much to your discredit. 482 00:30:17,166 --> 00:30:19,032 What are we fighting about? 483 00:30:19,033 --> 00:30:21,065 I don't know. 484 00:30:22,136 --> 00:30:23,834 Come here. 485 00:30:39,484 --> 00:30:40,950 Ow! 486 00:30:42,621 --> 00:30:44,454 What the hell was that for, huh? 487 00:30:44,456 --> 00:30:46,755 Because it felt good! 488 00:30:47,125 --> 00:30:47,957 Where are you going now? 489 00:30:47,958 --> 00:30:52,025 I'm going to the bathroom to get a Band-Aid! 490 00:30:53,296 --> 00:30:55,129 Hi, Harry. What are you doing here? 491 00:30:55,130 --> 00:30:56,261 Drying my hair. 492 00:30:56,265 --> 00:30:59,265 Have you been sitting here all this time, listening to everything? 493 00:30:59,267 --> 00:31:00,799 What's that? I can't hear you. 494 00:31:00,802 --> 00:31:03,201 I said, have you been sitting... 495 00:31:05,306 --> 00:31:08,606 Do you know your girlfriend is in there, drying her hair? 496 00:31:08,609 --> 00:31:10,674 I tried to tell you that when you came 497 00:31:10,676 --> 00:31:11,975 in here with your laundry bag, 498 00:31:11,977 --> 00:31:13,608 but you know how you are when you're in heat. 499 00:31:13,611 --> 00:31:15,643 Right, but what would have happened if she'd have walked 500 00:31:15,646 --> 00:31:17,178 in here when we were in the middle of... 501 00:31:17,180 --> 00:31:18,712 Harry, you and your fantasies. 502 00:31:18,715 --> 00:31:19,512 Well, tell her to go. 503 00:31:19,514 --> 00:31:22,381 I can't. They're painting her apartment. 504 00:31:22,383 --> 00:31:24,415 What about me? 505 00:31:24,919 --> 00:31:27,452 Well, is it my fault? 506 00:31:27,887 --> 00:31:31,587 I didn't know you were ready to spend the night, move in. 507 00:31:31,589 --> 00:31:35,890 I didn't know you were ready to make that kind of commitment. 508 00:31:38,729 --> 00:31:40,794 You're right. 509 00:31:41,565 --> 00:31:43,364 I'm not. 510 00:31:45,468 --> 00:31:47,233 I'll see you around, lady. 511 00:31:47,235 --> 00:31:50,703 Sure. Drop in anytime for a boff. 512 00:31:50,705 --> 00:31:52,004 Look, I want to tell you something. 513 00:31:52,006 --> 00:31:54,606 I don't want you to feel guilty or break out in hives or anything, 514 00:31:54,608 --> 00:32:01,112 but on this whole planet, there is no place for me to sleep tonight. 515 00:32:01,180 --> 00:32:03,113 Try the moon! 516 00:32:15,595 --> 00:32:18,462 Make the next right, please. 517 00:32:19,565 --> 00:32:22,666 Harry, you know I can't figure you out, man. 518 00:32:22,667 --> 00:32:26,901 I mean, how come you really want to get back in? 519 00:32:26,904 --> 00:32:28,669 It's just to get my... 520 00:32:28,673 --> 00:32:29,271 No, no, man. 521 00:32:29,273 --> 00:32:30,572 I don't mean the rooming house. 522 00:32:30,574 --> 00:32:35,275 I mean the looney-tune, blue-meanie world, man. I mean... 523 00:32:35,278 --> 00:32:39,245 Well, you dropped out. You were one of us. 524 00:32:40,314 --> 00:32:42,980 Well, it was getting cold out there, you know. 525 00:32:42,984 --> 00:32:49,154 And I was getting older, so I decided to drop in again, that's all. 526 00:32:49,589 --> 00:32:50,554 But how? I mean... 527 00:32:50,556 --> 00:32:54,758 You know, once you've seen this whole ugly oyster-tight-ass world, man, 528 00:32:54,760 --> 00:32:57,627 I mean, how can you want to go and swallow it again? 529 00:32:57,629 --> 00:32:58,794 I don't want to swallow it, Nick. 530 00:32:58,795 --> 00:33:01,127 I just want to find a way to live in it. 531 00:33:01,130 --> 00:33:02,929 Stop here. 532 00:33:03,932 --> 00:33:05,964 Thanks, Julie. 533 00:33:10,237 --> 00:33:13,338 Good scientist. Lousy lay. 534 00:33:19,244 --> 00:33:23,912 Hey, Nick, I really appreciate what you're doing, man. 535 00:33:25,516 --> 00:33:28,950 That's okay. This is good combat training. 536 00:33:28,953 --> 00:33:31,453 I got my draft notice today, man. 537 00:33:31,455 --> 00:33:33,721 What about your school deferment? 538 00:33:33,723 --> 00:33:35,788 I'm short on two units. 539 00:33:35,791 --> 00:33:39,626 I took two courses over, and they wouldn't count them. 540 00:33:39,628 --> 00:33:40,893 Did you flunk 'em? 541 00:33:40,895 --> 00:33:43,395 No, I just liked them. 542 00:33:43,597 --> 00:33:45,562 Can you get out of it? 543 00:33:45,565 --> 00:33:46,463 Are you kidding? 544 00:33:46,465 --> 00:33:49,999 I don't know. The best I could do was a corpsman. 545 00:33:50,001 --> 00:33:52,267 Harry, hang loose. 546 00:33:53,102 --> 00:33:57,237 There are a million ways for a cool head. 547 00:33:57,240 --> 00:33:58,938 You sure? 548 00:33:58,940 --> 00:33:59,872 Don't worry, man. 549 00:33:59,875 --> 00:34:02,174 I mean, there's nothing but room. 550 00:34:02,177 --> 00:34:04,176 You can have the whole apartment. 551 00:34:15,856 --> 00:34:21,792 So with the Marines recruiting here on campus, 552 00:34:21,794 --> 00:34:24,661 we should be allowed to have our 553 00:34:24,663 --> 00:34:27,396 "Resist the Draft" information booth 554 00:34:27,399 --> 00:34:28,664 alongside of it. 555 00:34:28,666 --> 00:34:31,833 That's what my cousin Roberta wrote me they did. 556 00:34:31,835 --> 00:34:37,972 And she is a very influential member of the SDS at Michigan State. 557 00:34:37,975 --> 00:34:39,606 Hey, will you stop that crap? 558 00:34:39,609 --> 00:34:44,144 The SDS wouldn't waste a six-cents postage stamp on this group. 559 00:34:45,714 --> 00:34:46,511 What's wrong, Ellis? 560 00:34:46,513 --> 00:34:48,812 Well, your attitude. That's what's wrong. 561 00:34:48,815 --> 00:34:50,347 You don't ask for what's yours. 562 00:34:50,350 --> 00:34:52,583 I mean, when we get a Black Studies Department on this campus 563 00:34:52,585 --> 00:34:55,385 we'll tell them who's going to teach the group. 564 00:34:55,386 --> 00:34:58,153 I don't think they'll allow that. 565 00:34:58,156 --> 00:34:58,787 Allow? 566 00:34:58,789 --> 00:35:00,388 We should be permitted to circulate 567 00:35:00,390 --> 00:35:03,723 a petition for a referendum to legalize grass. 568 00:35:03,725 --> 00:35:07,593 We only need 25,000 signatures, right, Harry? 569 00:35:07,596 --> 00:35:10,196 What? It's 50,000. 570 00:35:10,198 --> 00:35:13,598 It's based on one percent of the registered vote. 571 00:35:13,600 --> 00:35:15,265 I think that we should ask to vote... 572 00:35:15,269 --> 00:35:20,372 We should demand an end to the separation of the sexes in the dorms. 573 00:35:20,373 --> 00:35:22,004 We have a good chance of getting it 574 00:35:22,007 --> 00:35:26,341 because the whole campus is getting out of hand. 575 00:35:34,317 --> 00:35:38,318 Furthermore, I think we have a strong chance of attaining these goals. 576 00:35:38,321 --> 00:35:42,955 Especially since there's been a lot of precedence set for it recently. 577 00:35:42,959 --> 00:35:43,524 Right, Harry? 578 00:35:43,525 --> 00:35:46,825 Yeah. Yale in '67, and Sarah Lawrence last month. 579 00:35:46,828 --> 00:35:48,627 You ain't gonna get laid no how. 580 00:35:48,629 --> 00:35:50,628 I mean, a draft-resistance booth on campus. 581 00:35:50,631 --> 00:35:53,798 I mean, "We gotta get a booth because they got a booth." 582 00:35:53,801 --> 00:35:57,002 I mean, they also got ROTC, Dow Chemical recruiting, 583 00:35:57,004 --> 00:35:58,435 and they got the CIA everywhere. 584 00:35:58,437 --> 00:36:00,303 They don't have the CIA on this campus. 585 00:36:00,306 --> 00:36:01,704 What do you know about the CIA? 586 00:36:01,706 --> 00:36:05,440 I mean, this is a state university with federal funds, boy. 587 00:36:05,444 --> 00:36:06,075 They got the CIA. 588 00:36:06,077 --> 00:36:09,545 Look, I don't say this with any hostility whatsoever, 589 00:36:09,546 --> 00:36:10,411 but you're full of crap. 590 00:36:10,414 --> 00:36:11,845 Now, look, my father is the head 591 00:36:11,847 --> 00:36:14,847 of the Alumni Association at this university, 592 00:36:14,851 --> 00:36:19,085 and if there was a CIA group on this campus, I would know about it. 593 00:36:20,888 --> 00:36:22,253 The Alumni Association? 594 00:36:22,256 --> 00:36:22,887 Right! 595 00:36:22,889 --> 00:36:25,588 The head of the Alumni Association. 596 00:36:25,592 --> 00:36:27,124 Let me get out of here. 597 00:36:27,125 --> 00:36:28,390 What am I doing with you idiots? 598 00:36:28,392 --> 00:36:29,823 Please, Ellis, Ellis. Don't get excited. 599 00:36:29,827 --> 00:36:33,328 Ellis, listen, we've got to stay and work together, Ellis. 600 00:36:33,329 --> 00:36:35,661 We can't fight among ourselves. We've got to work together. 601 00:36:35,665 --> 00:36:38,297 We've got to be united. Settle down and just do it. 602 00:36:38,300 --> 00:36:40,099 Right, right. That's right. Right. 603 00:36:40,100 --> 00:36:42,065 That is right. Right. United. 604 00:36:42,068 --> 00:36:45,068 You know, we represent 400 students 605 00:36:45,071 --> 00:36:50,039 in a university of 15,000 gutless wonders 606 00:36:50,043 --> 00:36:53,076 who are too damned self-involved 607 00:36:53,078 --> 00:36:55,845 to give a crap about what's going on. 608 00:36:55,848 --> 00:36:57,013 Right, Harry? 609 00:36:57,014 --> 00:37:00,647 I said, right, Harry the expert? 610 00:37:02,185 --> 00:37:02,883 Yeah, right. Right. 611 00:37:02,885 --> 00:37:04,684 I mean, is that why you're not involved, Harry? 612 00:37:04,687 --> 00:37:08,020 You're too busy getting A's to spare the time? 613 00:37:08,023 --> 00:37:10,289 Yeah, right. Right, Ellis. I can't spare the time 614 00:37:10,291 --> 00:37:11,523 to stand in front of the Student Union building 615 00:37:11,525 --> 00:37:16,426 passing out pamphlets to protest for the rights of monkeys 616 00:37:16,429 --> 00:37:17,895 to copulate in Biology Lab 617 00:37:17,896 --> 00:37:20,162 before we turn them over for vivisection. 618 00:37:20,164 --> 00:37:22,496 One of the burning issues of our time. 619 00:37:22,499 --> 00:37:26,099 Harry, we're not monkeys. 620 00:37:26,102 --> 00:37:26,899 We're human beings. 621 00:37:26,903 --> 00:37:29,169 We're involved in a protest for self-rule, 622 00:37:29,171 --> 00:37:33,640 to have something to say in shaping our own futures. 623 00:37:33,642 --> 00:37:37,076 Okay. Look, I apologize. Go do it. 624 00:37:37,177 --> 00:37:40,678 Besides, it's been a dull year and it's a good, safe target. 625 00:37:40,680 --> 00:37:43,079 What's a good, safe target? 626 00:37:43,083 --> 00:37:45,115 The campus, where it's safe to measure 627 00:37:45,118 --> 00:37:47,183 ding-a-lings with the establishment 628 00:37:47,185 --> 00:37:48,984 because they let you. 629 00:37:48,987 --> 00:37:51,220 I don't have a ding-a-ling, Harry. 630 00:37:51,222 --> 00:37:52,120 Why protest on the campus? 631 00:37:52,121 --> 00:37:54,888 Why not out in the real world where it will do some good? 632 00:37:54,891 --> 00:37:56,457 You want to sell draft tips? 633 00:37:56,459 --> 00:37:57,156 Forget about college kids! 634 00:37:57,159 --> 00:37:58,625 I mean, they'll take care of themselves. 635 00:37:58,626 --> 00:38:00,425 Set your booth outside of a munitions factory 636 00:38:00,428 --> 00:38:02,594 where those poor, ignorant suckers don't have a chance. 637 00:38:02,596 --> 00:38:06,164 Of course, you just might get your teeth kicked in for your trouble. 638 00:38:06,166 --> 00:38:07,965 Hey, don't worry about us, man. We're not worried about 639 00:38:07,966 --> 00:38:09,597 getting our teeth kicked in by anybody! 640 00:38:09,600 --> 00:38:11,800 Hey, Ellis, will you stop hating so much, man? 641 00:38:11,803 --> 00:38:13,302 I mean, you get so caught up in it, 642 00:38:13,303 --> 00:38:15,001 you never get anything important done. 643 00:38:15,672 --> 00:38:18,371 Don't tell a black man what's important and what's not important. 644 00:38:18,373 --> 00:38:22,640 Man, you walk around in a black skin before you do that! 645 00:38:22,743 --> 00:38:24,309 Okay, man. 646 00:38:24,311 --> 00:38:26,376 I take it back. 647 00:38:26,747 --> 00:38:29,713 It's vital, yeah, it's crucial, to the future of your people 648 00:38:29,716 --> 00:38:32,716 whether a white man or a black man teaches you 649 00:38:32,718 --> 00:38:34,017 that Nat Turner had hemorrhoids, 650 00:38:34,019 --> 00:38:35,952 or that Beethoven's mother was an octoroon. 651 00:38:35,954 --> 00:38:38,053 Yeah, I know that Black Studies is important, 652 00:38:38,057 --> 00:38:39,755 but do you think it's more important than Selma, 653 00:38:39,758 --> 00:38:42,024 where they took on the cops, the National Guard and the Governor? 654 00:38:42,026 --> 00:38:44,559 Is it more important than sitting in at a Woolworths counter 655 00:38:44,561 --> 00:38:48,462 and not letting anybody eat the tuna fish unless everybody can? 656 00:38:48,463 --> 00:38:49,929 Selma was then, and this is now! 657 00:38:49,931 --> 00:38:53,231 Hey, man, and besides, you got a big mouth for a college boy 658 00:38:53,234 --> 00:38:55,434 who's never been south of Bitville. 659 00:38:55,437 --> 00:38:58,770 I mean, you talk about Selma like you were there! 660 00:39:00,173 --> 00:39:02,272 I was there, man. 661 00:39:02,276 --> 00:39:06,577 Then you think what we're doing isn't important? 662 00:39:06,579 --> 00:39:07,944 Isn't valid? 663 00:39:07,947 --> 00:39:09,679 Of course it's important. Do it, do it. 664 00:39:09,683 --> 00:39:11,816 Look, I'm not putting it down. I've just done it already. 665 00:39:11,817 --> 00:39:15,818 Will you... Go and do it, and let me study, will you? 666 00:39:37,976 --> 00:39:39,875 Didn't you just take those out of the dryer? 667 00:39:39,876 --> 00:39:41,207 Hey, Wade. Yeah. 668 00:39:41,211 --> 00:39:42,609 It's the fourth time through. 669 00:39:42,612 --> 00:39:43,510 But it's not bad, though. 670 00:39:43,512 --> 00:39:45,979 The wash-and-dry cycle takes two hours. 671 00:39:45,980 --> 00:39:48,379 That's two hours of heat, light 672 00:39:48,383 --> 00:39:49,481 and a quiet place to sit and study, 673 00:39:49,484 --> 00:39:52,284 only for a quarter. You want me to help you? 674 00:39:52,286 --> 00:39:53,752 Would you like the warm cycle, 675 00:39:53,753 --> 00:39:55,953 or would you like the hot cycle? 676 00:39:55,956 --> 00:39:56,720 Man, I don't know. 677 00:39:56,722 --> 00:39:59,655 My wife usually does this, but that dumb machine's broken. 678 00:39:59,658 --> 00:40:01,023 You're gonna find this hard to believe, 679 00:40:01,026 --> 00:40:02,592 but I've spent so much time with these machines 680 00:40:02,594 --> 00:40:05,494 that we have a very close relationship going. 681 00:40:05,496 --> 00:40:07,028 Morris, this is my friend, Wade. 682 00:40:07,031 --> 00:40:09,531 Harry, how would you like a job? 683 00:40:09,533 --> 00:40:10,131 Doing what? 684 00:40:10,132 --> 00:40:13,532 You know, at school, helping me out with the brochures, 685 00:40:13,536 --> 00:40:15,835 guided tours, press releases. 686 00:40:15,838 --> 00:40:20,773 It's easy, especially with your background in writing. 687 00:40:21,208 --> 00:40:23,041 Why don't you come to dinner tonight? 688 00:40:23,043 --> 00:40:24,174 We'll talk it over. 689 00:40:24,178 --> 00:40:26,177 Okay. Bring Jan. 690 00:40:26,180 --> 00:40:27,178 Certainly. 691 00:40:27,181 --> 00:40:27,978 Have you got any change? 692 00:40:27,980 --> 00:40:29,645 Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got lots of change. 693 00:40:29,648 --> 00:40:31,114 What's that, a half a buck? Mmm-hmm. 694 00:40:31,117 --> 00:40:36,854 There's 25, there's 31, there's 42... 695 00:40:36,856 --> 00:40:40,223 Harry, no, no, no, no pennies. 696 00:40:40,226 --> 00:40:41,191 You'll owe me a nickel. 697 00:40:41,193 --> 00:40:42,425 Hey, Wade, wait a second. 698 00:40:42,427 --> 00:40:43,558 A job, dinner, that's fine. 699 00:40:43,560 --> 00:40:45,225 But you've got to leave a man something, Wade. 700 00:40:45,228 --> 00:40:50,463 I mean, heck, a man has to retain his dignity. Now we're even. 701 00:40:51,601 --> 00:40:53,534 No, no, it went fine. It went fine, Nick. 702 00:40:53,536 --> 00:40:55,402 I just don't know what I'm gonna do tomorrow. 703 00:40:55,403 --> 00:40:57,835 I got that goddamned visual-aids test 704 00:40:57,839 --> 00:41:00,238 right during my practice teaching. 705 00:41:00,240 --> 00:41:01,405 Harry, could you take a left here? 706 00:41:01,408 --> 00:41:05,910 Listen, Nick, I don't mind dropping you off, but I got to go meet Kasper. 707 00:41:05,912 --> 00:41:08,978 I don't have time to make a tour of the ghetto. 708 00:41:08,980 --> 00:41:11,379 Hey, is that Bromdecker's visual-aids course? 709 00:41:11,383 --> 00:41:12,882 You know, the one with the cellophane 710 00:41:12,883 --> 00:41:15,083 cutouts and the colored paper? 711 00:41:15,086 --> 00:41:16,150 Yeah. 712 00:41:16,152 --> 00:41:17,783 I took that course. 713 00:41:17,786 --> 00:41:20,118 You want me to take the exam for you? 714 00:41:22,824 --> 00:41:24,189 You think you could? 715 00:41:24,192 --> 00:41:25,057 Oh, yeah. 716 00:41:25,059 --> 00:41:26,558 Harry, stop. Stop the car. 717 00:41:26,559 --> 00:41:28,825 I just saw my deferment. 718 00:41:29,662 --> 00:41:32,562 Ma'am! Hey, ma'am! I'd like to talk to you! 719 00:41:32,564 --> 00:41:33,062 Hey, Nick. 720 00:41:33,063 --> 00:41:35,362 Ma'am, could I talk to you, please? Hey, Nick! 721 00:41:35,365 --> 00:41:36,796 Wait a minute. I'm not the heat. 722 00:41:36,800 --> 00:41:39,267 I want to marry you. See, I... 723 00:41:40,036 --> 00:41:40,833 Hey, Nick! 724 00:41:40,835 --> 00:41:41,667 What the hell is that? 725 00:41:41,670 --> 00:41:43,136 Who do you think you are? 726 00:41:43,137 --> 00:41:44,402 Come back here, man! 727 00:41:56,349 --> 00:42:02,985 So, Jeff had this little reversal problem, and they called us in, 728 00:42:02,987 --> 00:42:08,090 but luckily they catch these things in time, and now he's reading fine. 729 00:42:08,093 --> 00:42:11,928 Well, that's great. That's really great. 730 00:42:12,297 --> 00:42:13,195 Would you like some help? 731 00:42:13,196 --> 00:42:14,662 I could get the ice tray for you. 732 00:42:14,665 --> 00:42:18,365 No, you don't have to. It's automatic. 733 00:42:18,868 --> 00:42:19,800 Oh! 734 00:42:19,802 --> 00:42:22,068 That's great, too. 735 00:42:22,836 --> 00:42:23,434 No, no, no problem. 736 00:42:23,437 --> 00:42:27,438 I'll get it for you tomorrow at the office. An advance. 737 00:42:27,440 --> 00:42:31,140 Harry Bailey, $20, advance. 738 00:42:31,144 --> 00:42:32,943 No problem. 739 00:42:33,178 --> 00:42:34,543 Have another drink? 740 00:42:34,545 --> 00:42:35,910 No, I'm fine. 741 00:42:35,913 --> 00:42:37,445 Give me the ball! 742 00:42:37,448 --> 00:42:39,480 Give me the ball! 743 00:42:39,482 --> 00:42:41,180 So, what'll I write? 744 00:42:41,183 --> 00:42:42,715 Build the school image. 745 00:42:42,717 --> 00:42:45,016 Every time one of these kids with long hair 746 00:42:45,019 --> 00:42:46,984 blows his nose, it makes page one. 747 00:42:46,987 --> 00:42:48,853 Then the alumni contributions fall off, 748 00:42:48,855 --> 00:42:52,188 and the regents get on my back. 749 00:42:52,191 --> 00:42:55,725 If the kids would only stop trying to run the schools themselves 750 00:42:55,727 --> 00:42:59,027 and mind their own business, and keep out of left-wing politics. 751 00:42:59,030 --> 00:43:01,864 Wade, it has nothing to do with left-wing politics. 752 00:43:01,866 --> 00:43:03,631 It's happening all over the world. 753 00:43:03,634 --> 00:43:04,765 Look, they're having more trouble 754 00:43:04,769 --> 00:43:08,203 in Peking right now than we are at Berkeley. 755 00:43:08,338 --> 00:43:11,705 Okay, everybody, dinner's on the table. Come while it's hot. 756 00:43:11,707 --> 00:43:15,608 Children, hey, what about washing those paws, huh? 757 00:43:15,610 --> 00:43:18,143 Chop-chop. Soup's on. 758 00:43:19,246 --> 00:43:20,978 Now, why don't you sit right over here, Harry? 759 00:43:20,982 --> 00:43:22,347 I want to sit next to Daddy! 760 00:43:22,350 --> 00:43:23,282 I want to sit next to Daddy! 761 00:43:23,284 --> 00:43:24,583 All right, all right. Now, come on. 762 00:43:24,585 --> 00:43:25,450 You'll both sit next to me. 763 00:43:25,451 --> 00:43:28,285 Go ahead. There you go. I'll take that, Jan. 764 00:43:28,287 --> 00:43:29,652 Just sit right down there. 765 00:43:29,655 --> 00:43:30,854 Where's your drink? 766 00:43:30,856 --> 00:43:31,887 Inside. 767 00:43:31,890 --> 00:43:34,690 That looks real nice, hon. 768 00:43:35,192 --> 00:43:36,190 I wanna plug it in! 769 00:43:36,193 --> 00:43:37,458 I wanna plug it in! I wanna plug it in! 770 00:43:37,460 --> 00:43:40,092 Okay, Jeff, you can plug it in. 771 00:43:40,095 --> 00:43:42,628 Okay, kids, two big slices each, 772 00:43:42,630 --> 00:43:46,498 so you'll grow up nice and strong. 773 00:43:46,500 --> 00:43:47,631 Gotta get that old energy 774 00:43:47,635 --> 00:43:51,503 for marching and picketing and breaking through police lines. 775 00:43:51,505 --> 00:43:53,304 Wade, please stop it. 776 00:43:53,305 --> 00:43:54,970 Then when you grow up and get arrested, 777 00:43:54,973 --> 00:43:57,005 why, you can blame your poor old parents 778 00:43:57,008 --> 00:43:58,841 'cause they were too nice to you. 779 00:43:58,843 --> 00:44:01,009 Fed you too well, isn't that right, Harry? 780 00:44:01,012 --> 00:44:02,211 Roquefort or Thousand Island? 781 00:44:02,212 --> 00:44:03,210 Wade, are you sure you understand 782 00:44:03,213 --> 00:44:05,680 what it's all about with the kids? 783 00:44:05,682 --> 00:44:06,247 Politics. 784 00:44:06,250 --> 00:44:07,549 Make sure the kids get beans, will you? 785 00:44:07,551 --> 00:44:09,450 No, it has nothing to do with politics, Wade. 786 00:44:09,452 --> 00:44:10,249 It's personal identity. 787 00:44:10,251 --> 00:44:12,184 Harry, could we talk about it after dinner? 788 00:44:12,186 --> 00:44:13,584 What would you like on your salad? 789 00:44:13,587 --> 00:44:15,853 Personal identity, crap. The trouble is 790 00:44:15,855 --> 00:44:17,020 they don't believe in anything. 791 00:44:17,023 --> 00:44:17,888 You mean, they don't believe in 792 00:44:17,890 --> 00:44:19,189 all the bullshit you and I believed in, 793 00:44:19,191 --> 00:44:20,889 which, right off the bat, makes them a lot better off. 794 00:44:20,892 --> 00:44:25,193 They're real lovely, they are. 12-year-old girls on LSD. 795 00:44:25,195 --> 00:44:26,494 Taking LSD at 12. 796 00:44:26,496 --> 00:44:28,228 I mean, what kind of trip could that be? 797 00:44:28,231 --> 00:44:30,030 What kind of memories could you have at 12? 798 00:44:30,033 --> 00:44:31,798 Snow White, Winnie the Pooh? 799 00:44:31,800 --> 00:44:33,065 Well, you go ahead and make your joke, 800 00:44:33,067 --> 00:44:36,602 but you wouldn't think it was so funny if you had a daughter. 801 00:44:36,604 --> 00:44:39,537 Then when they get to be 16, you see them on television 802 00:44:39,540 --> 00:44:42,806 in living color in Chicago, rioting at the Convention. 803 00:44:42,809 --> 00:44:44,541 Hey, Wade, I saw that, too, and it was 804 00:44:44,544 --> 00:44:46,010 the police who were swinging the clubs. 805 00:44:46,013 --> 00:44:49,581 What do you expect with what those monsters were doing, 806 00:44:49,583 --> 00:44:54,217 cursing and defecating in the halls of the Hilton Hotel? 807 00:44:54,219 --> 00:44:55,283 Wade... 808 00:44:55,286 --> 00:44:55,983 We're eating dinner, Wade. 809 00:44:55,987 --> 00:44:59,020 Dumping garbage out of the hotel windows on people's heads 810 00:44:59,023 --> 00:45:03,125 and mocking our most sacred democratic institution of free elections. 811 00:45:03,127 --> 00:45:05,894 Wade, those kids are protesting a bunch of maniacs 812 00:45:05,895 --> 00:45:09,429 who are sending them off to drop napalm on people. 813 00:45:09,432 --> 00:45:10,863 You know, just ordinary people 814 00:45:10,865 --> 00:45:11,863 like you and Alice and the kids. 815 00:45:11,866 --> 00:45:16,234 Merely defecating in the lobby of the Hilton Hotel 816 00:45:16,238 --> 00:45:17,869 seems to be a pretty tame gesture. 817 00:45:17,872 --> 00:45:19,937 I'd call it fantastic restraint. 818 00:45:20,572 --> 00:45:23,305 What are you laughing at? 819 00:45:23,309 --> 00:45:26,042 No, come on, tell me. You have to tell me. 820 00:45:29,078 --> 00:45:30,743 Oh, come on. That's not fair. 821 00:45:30,746 --> 00:45:32,979 What are you laughing at? 822 00:45:32,981 --> 00:45:37,783 Oh, God, Harry. You really did it again. 823 00:45:37,785 --> 00:45:38,916 What a great speech. 824 00:45:38,920 --> 00:45:41,619 You're really lucky he didn't fire you. 825 00:45:41,622 --> 00:45:42,686 I know, I know, I know. 826 00:45:42,688 --> 00:45:44,386 I just couldn't help it, you know. 827 00:45:44,389 --> 00:45:45,086 I mean, I just... 828 00:45:45,089 --> 00:45:46,688 It was just too much, the whole scene. 829 00:45:46,690 --> 00:45:48,890 It just was too much. I couldn't stand it. 830 00:45:48,892 --> 00:45:50,124 Yeah, I mean, that little boy, 831 00:45:50,127 --> 00:45:52,927 I wanted to throw my baked potato at him. 832 00:45:53,161 --> 00:45:54,492 What do you mean? 833 00:45:54,495 --> 00:45:56,494 Oh, you know, Jan, suburbia. 834 00:45:56,498 --> 00:46:01,267 A picture-windowed look at the neighbor's adultery! 835 00:46:01,635 --> 00:46:03,534 I don't know what you're talking about, Harry. 836 00:46:03,536 --> 00:46:06,136 Of course you know what I'm talking about. 837 00:46:06,138 --> 00:46:08,004 I mean, you hate that ricky-tick existence 838 00:46:08,007 --> 00:46:10,706 as much as I do. As much as they do. 839 00:46:10,708 --> 00:46:12,908 I don't think that they hate it, Harry. 840 00:46:12,911 --> 00:46:15,144 I think that they're perfectly happy. 841 00:46:15,146 --> 00:46:18,112 They have a good marriage, and they have a lovely house. 842 00:46:18,115 --> 00:46:22,884 Yeah, so lovely, they made another 100 just like it. 843 00:46:22,886 --> 00:46:25,686 Oh, shut up, shut up. 844 00:46:25,687 --> 00:46:29,087 What do you mean, shut up, Jan? 845 00:46:29,091 --> 00:46:30,323 There's nothing intrinsically immoral 846 00:46:30,324 --> 00:46:34,159 about getting married and living in a tract house, Harry. 847 00:46:34,161 --> 00:46:38,529 Only you'll never know anything about that, will you? 848 00:46:38,533 --> 00:46:40,832 Not you, Harry. 849 00:46:50,211 --> 00:46:53,211 Oh, Harry, Jan, wait. Hey, you weren't gonna 850 00:46:53,214 --> 00:46:54,212 walk by, were you? I was waiting for you. 851 00:46:54,215 --> 00:46:57,049 We were having a party, left the door open, we were waiting for you. 852 00:46:57,051 --> 00:47:00,051 Thanks, Jake, but some other time. I'm really bushed. 853 00:47:00,054 --> 00:47:01,752 Oh, man. Come in just for just one drink. 854 00:47:01,755 --> 00:47:03,520 Come on, don't... Who's there? 855 00:47:03,522 --> 00:47:04,953 Everybody. All the rejects. 856 00:47:04,957 --> 00:47:05,822 No, really, I'm going to crash. 857 00:47:05,823 --> 00:47:07,788 I'm very tired. Harry, let's go in and have a drink. 858 00:47:07,792 --> 00:47:09,324 Harry, please, come on, just one drink. 859 00:47:09,325 --> 00:47:11,124 Harry... Come on, I'm very... 860 00:47:11,127 --> 00:47:12,225 Harry, come on. 861 00:47:12,227 --> 00:47:13,826 Jan, I gotta... 862 00:47:40,787 --> 00:47:41,918 Harry. 863 00:47:41,920 --> 00:47:43,985 Nick, you all right? 864 00:47:44,121 --> 00:47:45,152 Yeah, I'm fine. 865 00:47:45,155 --> 00:47:47,288 Sure. What happened with that lady in the street? 866 00:47:47,291 --> 00:47:50,224 Oh, no, it didn't work out, man. 867 00:47:50,227 --> 00:47:50,958 She was married already. 868 00:47:50,960 --> 00:47:53,893 Yeah. Probably one of those guys who was chasing you, right? 869 00:47:53,896 --> 00:47:54,494 To all of them. 870 00:47:54,496 --> 00:47:59,665 Hey, you know, that chick collects $900 a week on welfare. 871 00:47:59,668 --> 00:48:00,799 I'll see you later. 872 00:48:00,801 --> 00:48:01,465 Hey, wait a minute. 873 00:48:01,468 --> 00:48:02,833 Don't go away without saying goodbye now. 874 00:48:02,837 --> 00:48:07,171 Because that big silver bird in the sky leaves for Canada tonight. 875 00:48:07,174 --> 00:48:08,339 Really? 876 00:48:08,341 --> 00:48:10,006 All packed. 877 00:48:13,378 --> 00:48:15,177 This is crazy ding-a-ling. 878 00:48:15,180 --> 00:48:19,147 Look, you gotta give me my gas credit card back. 879 00:48:19,150 --> 00:48:22,450 My old lady saw the slips you signed. 880 00:48:22,453 --> 00:48:25,719 Harry the teacher. 881 00:48:25,722 --> 00:48:27,588 Not yet, Jake. Almost. Not yet, though. 882 00:48:27,590 --> 00:48:29,456 Interesting, of course, but doesn't it do 883 00:48:29,457 --> 00:48:31,590 something to your personal life? I mean... 884 00:48:31,593 --> 00:48:33,159 There have been times... 885 00:48:33,161 --> 00:48:34,526 I can imagine. 886 00:48:34,528 --> 00:48:35,426 Jan, come on, let's split. 887 00:48:35,429 --> 00:48:39,496 Oh, okay, Harry, I'll just finish my drink, is that all right? 888 00:48:39,498 --> 00:48:40,797 What did you say? 889 00:48:40,799 --> 00:48:42,999 I mean, where do you go from there? 890 00:48:43,001 --> 00:48:43,765 Well... 891 00:48:43,768 --> 00:48:45,833 Jan, come on, let's split. If I finish this drink 892 00:48:45,837 --> 00:48:47,235 I'm going to fall through the floor. 893 00:48:47,237 --> 00:48:51,339 And I still have to study tonight, remember? 894 00:48:51,574 --> 00:48:54,507 Okay. Okay. 895 00:48:56,980 --> 00:48:58,813 Bye, Doc. 896 00:48:58,815 --> 00:49:00,446 Harry, you know what? 897 00:49:00,449 --> 00:49:01,748 What? 898 00:49:01,750 --> 00:49:04,816 Hendrick. Hendrick, you maniac, later. 899 00:49:04,818 --> 00:49:08,386 I've gotta tell you why I've been acting like a bitch lately. 900 00:49:08,388 --> 00:49:09,286 It's okay, honey. Come on. 901 00:49:09,289 --> 00:49:12,555 No, the reason I've been acting like a bitch lately 902 00:49:12,558 --> 00:49:16,393 is because I think I want to get married. 903 00:49:16,560 --> 00:49:19,593 I know, I know. I know that it's the insane American syndrome 904 00:49:19,596 --> 00:49:22,929 to think that if you aren't married by the time you're 21, 905 00:49:22,933 --> 00:49:24,064 that you'll end up an old maid. 906 00:49:24,066 --> 00:49:28,067 But I really think that's what's happened to me. 907 00:49:32,341 --> 00:49:33,907 I really do. 908 00:49:34,575 --> 00:49:35,807 Jan, what's happened to you is 909 00:49:35,809 --> 00:49:37,140 that you're feeling very insecure lately 910 00:49:37,143 --> 00:49:40,611 because I haven't had the time to tell you what to do, okay? 911 00:49:40,613 --> 00:49:41,677 So, now, I will tell you what to do. 912 00:49:41,680 --> 00:49:43,880 We are going to go across the hall to your apartment 913 00:49:43,882 --> 00:49:47,616 and, we... I am going to read my chapters while you take a shower, 914 00:49:47,620 --> 00:49:49,453 then we're going to go to bed and make love, 915 00:49:49,454 --> 00:49:51,287 and in the morning you'll make me my breakfast 916 00:49:51,290 --> 00:49:53,656 and things will be just like the way they used to be. 917 00:49:53,658 --> 00:49:54,490 Now, what do you think of that? 918 00:49:54,493 --> 00:49:57,360 What have we here, one of those tawdry little domestics? 919 00:49:57,361 --> 00:49:59,194 I think I'll call a cop. 920 00:49:59,196 --> 00:50:02,796 Oh, marvelous, that's great! Wonderful, 921 00:50:02,799 --> 00:50:05,299 marvelous. She thinks she'll call a cop. 922 00:50:05,302 --> 00:50:06,333 That's just what I deserve, 923 00:50:06,335 --> 00:50:09,202 trying to change a WASP mannequin 924 00:50:09,205 --> 00:50:12,406 into a thinking, feeling human being. 925 00:50:12,573 --> 00:50:16,107 Imagine trying to educate a pathetic dum-dum like me. 926 00:50:16,109 --> 00:50:20,845 Offering the great ideas of our age to a girl who is so shallow 927 00:50:20,848 --> 00:50:22,813 she sees nothing wrong with wanting to get 928 00:50:22,816 --> 00:50:25,383 married and live in a nice neighborhood 929 00:50:25,385 --> 00:50:30,053 and sleep in a bed that doesn't fold down from out of the wall. 930 00:50:30,056 --> 00:50:32,189 I'm so middle-class I might even 931 00:50:32,190 --> 00:50:33,756 enjoy watching television with my husband. 932 00:50:33,758 --> 00:50:39,727 Well, lots of luck, baby, I hope both of you live happily ever after. 933 00:50:39,731 --> 00:50:42,298 Don't worry, Harry, I didn't mean you. 934 00:50:42,300 --> 00:50:45,266 You bet your sweet ass you didn't mean me. 935 00:50:45,269 --> 00:50:46,534 Jesus Christ! 936 00:50:46,536 --> 00:50:47,567 It certainly didn't take you long, did it? 937 00:50:47,570 --> 00:50:50,603 Five bloody minutes in suburbia, and you're ready to join up 938 00:50:50,605 --> 00:50:53,205 with the A & P, blue chip, Little League, 939 00:50:53,207 --> 00:50:54,372 pill-taking, once-a-week-on-Saturday-night, 940 00:50:54,375 --> 00:50:59,111 "I got a headache, Harry," shopping and chopping society! 941 00:51:01,380 --> 00:51:04,680 Well, the American bitch strikes again. 942 00:51:04,683 --> 00:51:07,583 Thank you, Ernest Hemingway, Philip Roth, 943 00:51:07,585 --> 00:51:10,651 Norman Mailer, F. Scott Fitzgerald! 944 00:51:10,655 --> 00:51:14,889 You know, that is what is really wrong with this rotten society! 945 00:51:14,892 --> 00:51:17,224 Instead of burning our draft cards, 946 00:51:17,227 --> 00:51:19,926 we should be out burning the library cards 947 00:51:19,928 --> 00:51:23,496 we give to dumb broads like that. 948 00:51:27,536 --> 00:51:29,135 Harry... 949 00:51:33,474 --> 00:51:35,105 Good girl. 950 00:51:35,874 --> 00:51:37,473 Harry? 951 00:51:38,776 --> 00:51:45,379 If you're so goddamned smart, why can't you make me happy? 952 00:51:48,985 --> 00:51:50,650 Listen, don't worry about me. 953 00:51:50,654 --> 00:51:51,351 I'm going to be fine. 954 00:51:51,354 --> 00:51:53,686 You know, I'm just concerned about you, you know. 955 00:51:53,689 --> 00:51:55,788 I mean, going there and not knowing anybody. 956 00:51:55,790 --> 00:51:57,923 Oh, no, no, don't worry about me. 957 00:51:57,926 --> 00:51:59,225 I don't want you to be alone. 958 00:51:59,227 --> 00:52:01,360 Now, look-it, I gave you Luan's number. 959 00:52:01,361 --> 00:52:02,560 Now, call her, will you? 960 00:52:02,562 --> 00:52:04,728 'Cause she is a great chick. 961 00:52:04,731 --> 00:52:05,495 And promise me you'll call. 962 00:52:05,497 --> 00:52:06,595 - Yeah. - Last call, 963 00:52:06,599 --> 00:52:11,001 Air Canada, Flight 701, Gate 4, now boarding. 964 00:52:11,002 --> 00:52:15,036 At least you'll have a good place to spend the night. 965 00:52:15,039 --> 00:52:17,305 Take care, man. 966 00:52:18,541 --> 00:52:20,107 Chief Running Water? 967 00:52:20,109 --> 00:52:20,840 Yeah. 968 00:52:20,843 --> 00:52:24,644 Also known as Nick Philbert? 969 00:52:28,183 --> 00:52:28,947 Yeah. 970 00:52:28,949 --> 00:52:33,951 Your check for $129, no account. 971 00:52:37,959 --> 00:52:39,390 Now, you stole their lands. 972 00:52:39,392 --> 00:52:41,791 You took our natural resources. 973 00:52:41,795 --> 00:52:42,492 You raped their women. 974 00:52:42,495 --> 00:52:43,860 You killed about 10 million of us. 975 00:52:43,862 --> 00:52:48,563 Now you won't even let us leave your damned country! 976 00:52:49,701 --> 00:52:51,132 Thug. 977 00:53:06,283 --> 00:53:07,815 Harry. 978 00:53:07,883 --> 00:53:11,884 What do you think of James Baldwin? 979 00:53:12,387 --> 00:53:15,353 Come on, you can be honest with me. 980 00:53:19,592 --> 00:53:23,926 Well, I think he's a hell of a writer. 981 00:53:26,864 --> 00:53:31,131 Did you ever make it with a black chick before? 982 00:53:31,134 --> 00:53:32,832 You got my cherry. 983 00:53:32,835 --> 00:53:36,636 You're pretty good. But a little inhibited. 984 00:53:36,638 --> 00:53:41,306 Yeah, well, you see, I was replaying the '55 World Series 985 00:53:41,309 --> 00:53:44,209 in my mind so I could last. 986 00:53:52,352 --> 00:53:55,652 Who's the greatest writer you ever read? 987 00:53:55,656 --> 00:53:58,389 Shakespeare, far and away. 988 00:53:58,524 --> 00:54:00,357 Then who? 989 00:54:02,295 --> 00:54:05,028 Name all the best ones. 990 00:54:06,432 --> 00:54:09,232 Well, there was Chaucer. 991 00:54:09,734 --> 00:54:13,801 And... Proust. 992 00:54:15,771 --> 00:54:18,470 And Tolstoy. 993 00:54:21,376 --> 00:54:23,074 Cummings. 994 00:54:23,843 --> 00:54:25,375 Malamud. 995 00:54:25,378 --> 00:54:29,078 Faulkner, sometimes. Fitzgerald. 996 00:54:29,080 --> 00:54:31,213 Wait a minute. 997 00:54:41,993 --> 00:54:45,059 Here. Write those down for me, will you? 998 00:54:45,061 --> 00:54:50,396 I should know better, but I could send you some if you like. Some books. 999 00:54:50,400 --> 00:54:56,736 No, thanks. I mean, that's kind of like you paid me, if you dig. 1000 00:54:56,738 --> 00:54:57,937 I didn't mean it that way. 1001 00:54:57,940 --> 00:55:00,372 I can find them in the library. 1002 00:55:00,374 --> 00:55:01,906 You got a card, too, huh? 1003 00:55:01,908 --> 00:55:04,841 Yeah. You just write them down. 1004 00:55:04,844 --> 00:55:07,777 You'd be surprised how much I learn that way. 1005 00:55:07,780 --> 00:55:09,613 No, no, not a bit. 1006 00:55:09,616 --> 00:55:12,817 In fact, your whole approach to education is fantastic. 1007 00:55:12,819 --> 00:55:16,519 It beats the hell out of group dynamics and the unit system. 1008 00:55:16,521 --> 00:55:19,187 Of course, a class of 50 would cripple 1009 00:55:19,190 --> 00:55:21,957 the teacher over the long haul. 1010 00:55:21,960 --> 00:55:27,129 Well, well, look who's alive again, and so soon. 1011 00:55:27,131 --> 00:55:28,396 Huh? 1012 00:55:29,098 --> 00:55:30,529 Oh... 1013 00:55:30,732 --> 00:55:35,066 Ignore him, he has no conscience. 1014 00:55:58,157 --> 00:55:59,855 Hey, Nick? 1015 00:56:02,026 --> 00:56:03,057 Nick? 1016 00:56:03,060 --> 00:56:04,893 Good morning, my child. 1017 00:56:04,895 --> 00:56:07,261 For Christ sakes. 1018 00:56:10,366 --> 00:56:13,266 For Christ sakes, man, what are you dressed up like that for? 1019 00:56:13,268 --> 00:56:14,899 Oh, not for Christ's sake. 1020 00:56:14,902 --> 00:56:16,701 For Buddha's sake. 1021 00:56:16,704 --> 00:56:17,501 A religious deferment. 1022 00:56:17,503 --> 00:56:20,303 Yes, yes. You see, we of the Bahia 1023 00:56:20,306 --> 00:56:22,004 Baba Buddha Buddhist Brotherhood 1024 00:56:22,006 --> 00:56:24,773 are committed to noninvolvement. 1025 00:56:24,776 --> 00:56:26,075 Right. But you're also committed 1026 00:56:26,077 --> 00:56:27,309 to take a test for me today, remember? 1027 00:56:27,310 --> 00:56:30,576 Oh, yes, yes, I know. I have not forgotten. 1028 00:56:30,580 --> 00:56:31,845 Nick, are you high? Yes, 1029 00:56:31,846 --> 00:56:35,681 on love, and brotherhood, inner peace... 1030 00:56:35,683 --> 00:56:37,048 Yeah, what else, what else? 1031 00:56:37,051 --> 00:56:37,649 Oh, come on, Harry. 1032 00:56:37,651 --> 00:56:39,616 Don't. I mean, it's too early in the morning 1033 00:56:39,619 --> 00:56:41,752 for that. I just had breakfast. 1034 00:56:41,755 --> 00:56:42,886 I can smell the brownies on your breath. 1035 00:56:42,888 --> 00:56:45,655 Yeah. And it's better in brownies than in Rice Krispies. 1036 00:56:45,658 --> 00:56:48,958 Nick, are you going to be able to remember the answers? 1037 00:56:48,961 --> 00:56:50,926 Remember the... Harry. 1038 00:56:50,928 --> 00:56:53,795 Okay. Then miss one or two just to make it look good, okay? 1039 00:56:53,798 --> 00:56:55,063 And the building you see across the quad is 1040 00:56:55,065 --> 00:57:00,367 the second-largest college library in the United States. 1041 00:57:00,636 --> 00:57:01,634 It's a wonderful school. 1042 00:57:01,637 --> 00:57:05,405 You'll have a groovy time. Terrific memories. 1043 00:57:05,407 --> 00:57:08,473 New parking spaces coming next fall. 1044 00:57:08,476 --> 00:57:11,376 Lots of laughs, plenty of chicks. 1045 00:57:11,378 --> 00:57:13,311 Contraception is compulsory. 1046 00:57:13,313 --> 00:57:16,980 For every three loose-leaf books, you get a package of pills. 1047 00:57:16,982 --> 00:57:24,920 Over there is the Dory Rush Pavilion. And that is the Ladies' Gym, 1048 00:57:24,923 --> 00:57:28,424 and over there is a protest, 1049 00:57:29,126 --> 00:57:33,027 which we hope doesn't turn into a riot. 1050 00:57:33,130 --> 00:57:35,263 And that's my girl in between those two guys. 1051 00:57:35,264 --> 00:57:37,197 That pretty one with the rosy glasses 1052 00:57:37,199 --> 00:57:39,465 and the perfectly chiseled nose. 1053 00:57:39,467 --> 00:57:41,165 Excuse me a second. Don't go away. 1054 00:57:41,168 --> 00:57:42,900 Don't apply to another school. 1055 00:57:42,904 --> 00:57:45,170 I'll be right back. 1056 00:57:47,273 --> 00:57:50,107 Jan! Jan! 1057 00:57:50,110 --> 00:57:51,309 I don't believe it. What are you doing here? 1058 00:57:51,311 --> 00:57:54,277 Last night you were ready to move to the suburbs, remember? 1059 00:57:54,280 --> 00:57:56,312 You said that, Harry. I didn't say that. 1060 00:57:56,315 --> 00:57:58,214 Look, will you put the sign down 1061 00:57:58,216 --> 00:57:59,448 and stop screwing around with history? 1062 00:57:59,450 --> 00:58:03,717 Harry, I'm not taking classes from you anymore, remember? 1063 00:58:03,720 --> 00:58:06,554 I dropped out last night. 1064 00:58:10,192 --> 00:58:11,791 One other thing. 1065 00:58:11,792 --> 00:58:13,157 What? 1066 00:58:13,161 --> 00:58:16,194 A man who can't believe in a cause can never believe in himself, 1067 00:58:16,196 --> 00:58:18,963 and that goes for a woman, too, Harry. 1068 00:58:18,966 --> 00:58:20,231 I hope that doesn't sound too much 1069 00:58:20,232 --> 00:58:22,699 like your precious Fitzgerald. 1070 00:58:22,702 --> 00:58:24,133 Look, it doesn't sound like Fitzgerald. 1071 00:58:24,135 --> 00:58:25,266 It sounds like me when I was 12. 1072 00:58:25,270 --> 00:58:27,536 You should have stuck around and finished the course, you know. 1073 00:58:27,538 --> 00:58:28,969 You would have saved yourself a lot of marching. 1074 00:58:28,971 --> 00:58:30,369 Look, will you guys please cut it out? 1075 00:58:30,373 --> 00:58:31,939 You're holding up the whole march. 1076 00:58:31,940 --> 00:58:32,838 Now get back in the line. 1077 00:58:32,840 --> 00:58:36,240 If you have to play Virginia Woolf, do it in the coffee shop. 1078 00:58:36,244 --> 00:58:39,644 She hit me in the head with a sign. 1079 00:59:00,500 --> 00:59:04,602 - We want Vandy! We want Vandy! - We want Vandy! We want Vandy! 1080 00:59:04,605 --> 00:59:08,272 We want Vandy! We want Vandy! We want Vandy! We want Vandy! 1081 00:59:08,275 --> 00:59:11,241 All right now, kids, get the hell out of here. 1082 00:59:11,243 --> 00:59:13,176 Come on, now. Clear out. All of you. 1083 00:59:13,178 --> 00:59:15,477 Not until we see President Vandenburg. 1084 00:59:15,480 --> 00:59:16,177 No, negative. 1085 00:59:16,180 --> 00:59:18,212 Now, go on, clear out, all of you. 1086 00:59:19,650 --> 00:59:23,118 Now, remember, anybody over 30 is the enemy. 1087 00:59:23,120 --> 00:59:27,354 So be careful when you cheat on your college boards, okay? 1088 00:59:27,357 --> 00:59:28,289 I'll see you next semester. 1089 00:59:28,290 --> 00:59:30,790 And for God's sake, girls, save yourselves. 1090 00:59:30,792 --> 00:59:34,660 We'll be waiting for you in the fall. 1091 00:59:47,106 --> 00:59:51,208 Now, get back to your classes, or you'll get absentee slips! 1092 00:59:53,212 --> 00:59:56,879 This is our school, and we're not leaving till we have a meeting! 1093 00:59:56,882 --> 00:59:58,481 - Yeah! - Yeah! 1094 00:59:58,483 --> 01:00:00,582 Yeah, well, you just had your meeting. 1095 01:00:00,586 --> 01:00:02,885 Now, clear out, all of you. 1096 01:00:03,354 --> 01:00:07,456 Come on, kids. Please get off the steps. 1097 01:00:09,027 --> 01:00:11,760 Will you please get off the steps? 1098 01:00:11,762 --> 01:00:14,061 Hey! Police brutality! 1099 01:00:18,168 --> 01:00:21,168 All right, now, go on. Beat it. 1100 01:00:27,743 --> 01:00:28,540 What did they want? 1101 01:00:28,544 --> 01:00:30,110 They want to meet with Vandenburg. 1102 01:00:30,111 --> 01:00:32,076 What do they think this is, Berkeley? 1103 01:00:32,079 --> 01:00:33,645 Wow, wow, thank God you stopped them. 1104 01:00:33,647 --> 01:00:38,548 I mean, you have got to draw the line someplace, right? 1105 01:00:40,353 --> 01:00:45,254 And that's the difference between syntax and whatever it is. 1106 01:00:45,257 --> 01:00:47,022 - I don't know what it is. - Meaning. 1107 01:00:47,024 --> 01:00:47,555 Meaning, right. 1108 01:00:47,557 --> 01:00:52,792 Okay, we'll continue the discussion tomorrow. Class is dismissed. 1109 01:02:06,165 --> 01:02:07,563 Jan? 1110 01:02:10,267 --> 01:02:11,698 Jan? 1111 01:02:37,324 --> 01:02:39,089 How's everything? 1112 01:02:39,493 --> 01:02:41,092 Good. 1113 01:02:41,526 --> 01:02:43,191 You? Good. 1114 01:02:43,662 --> 01:02:45,461 Beautiful. 1115 01:02:47,664 --> 01:02:49,763 What's happening? 1116 01:02:49,766 --> 01:02:53,667 Nothing. Just have a few people over. 1117 01:02:55,804 --> 01:02:58,004 Why don't you come on in? 1118 01:02:58,007 --> 01:03:01,407 I know you two know each other. 1119 01:03:01,910 --> 01:03:06,544 And this is my friend, Dr. Bill Greengrass. 1120 01:03:09,684 --> 01:03:10,715 PhD? 1121 01:03:10,718 --> 01:03:11,616 No, medical. 1122 01:03:11,618 --> 01:03:13,917 Oh, what's your specialty? 1123 01:03:13,920 --> 01:03:15,551 GYN. 1124 01:03:17,455 --> 01:03:18,219 Gynecologist. 1125 01:03:18,222 --> 01:03:24,491 I know that a GYN is a gynecologist! 1126 01:03:24,826 --> 01:03:26,625 Oh, crap! 1127 01:03:26,628 --> 01:03:28,994 No, no, that's a proctologist, Harry. 1128 01:03:28,997 --> 01:03:31,530 Harry, how about a cup of coffee? 1129 01:03:31,532 --> 01:03:32,930 Sweetheart, get Harry a cup of coffee. 1130 01:03:32,932 --> 01:03:35,732 Two lumps, buddy? Harry, Bill has been telling us 1131 01:03:35,735 --> 01:03:36,633 the most interesting thing. 1132 01:03:36,634 --> 01:03:39,567 Harry's going to be a teacher, Bill, so I think 1133 01:03:39,570 --> 01:03:42,103 that he would fit right in there, wouldn't he? 1134 01:03:42,105 --> 01:03:44,070 Oh, sure. Sure, he would. 1135 01:03:44,073 --> 01:03:45,137 Of course, there'd be absolutely 1136 01:03:45,141 --> 01:03:46,572 no problem at all. He'd fit in fine. 1137 01:03:46,575 --> 01:03:49,175 Well, Bill... Well, anyway, Harry, this... 1138 01:03:49,177 --> 01:03:52,810 Bill has a plan that he was just telling us about. 1139 01:03:52,812 --> 01:03:56,346 No, no, no, I'm sorry. It's not really my plan, 1140 01:03:56,348 --> 01:03:57,580 actually. It's called a Keho plan. 1141 01:03:57,583 --> 01:03:59,315 Well, it's the most interesting thing. 1142 01:03:59,317 --> 01:04:01,616 Why don't you tell Harry about the Keho plan? 1143 01:04:01,619 --> 01:04:04,086 Go ahead and tell Harry about the plan. 1144 01:04:04,089 --> 01:04:04,921 Sure. 1145 01:04:04,922 --> 01:04:07,888 Yes, tell Harry about the plan, Bill. 1146 01:04:07,891 --> 01:04:13,961 Sure. Well, you see, instead of just buying straight life insurance, 1147 01:04:13,963 --> 01:04:15,228 you buy mutual funds, 1148 01:04:15,230 --> 01:04:16,294 then you go and you borrow the money 1149 01:04:16,297 --> 01:04:19,164 to pay for a short-term life-insurance policy. 1150 01:04:19,166 --> 01:04:22,333 Now, the dividends, you see, from the mutual funds will, in fact, 1151 01:04:22,336 --> 01:04:24,169 pay for the premium on the life, 1152 01:04:24,170 --> 01:04:25,969 so that, say, at the end of 20 years, 1153 01:04:25,971 --> 01:04:28,937 instead of just having a paid-up life insurance policy 1154 01:04:28,940 --> 01:04:33,442 you'll wind up with a good $500,000 estate. 1155 01:04:34,279 --> 01:04:36,044 That's terrific. That's... 1156 01:04:36,047 --> 01:04:37,178 Yeah. 1157 01:04:37,180 --> 01:04:39,313 But I'm a little confused. 1158 01:04:39,315 --> 01:04:40,180 Well, I'll send you a brochure. 1159 01:04:40,183 --> 01:04:44,351 No, no, no. I mean, I thought that you were a gynecologist. 1160 01:04:44,352 --> 01:04:48,153 You know, gynecologist, women, pain, babies, 1161 01:04:48,155 --> 01:04:53,123 and now I find out that you are really the Vice President 1162 01:04:53,126 --> 01:04:54,959 of the City National Bank! 1163 01:04:54,961 --> 01:04:57,127 Harry, it's your own philosophy. 1164 01:04:57,130 --> 01:04:59,195 I mean, why be victims of the insurance companies, 1165 01:04:59,197 --> 01:05:02,497 letting them make millions off us, when we can do it ourselves? 1166 01:05:02,500 --> 01:05:05,701 Oh, you're going to explain capitalism to me now, right? 1167 01:05:05,703 --> 01:05:09,303 That is just what I need, for you to tell me that! 1168 01:05:09,306 --> 01:05:11,338 I mean, when did you become a capitalist? 1169 01:05:11,341 --> 01:05:13,140 Last night at 3:00 in the morning? 1170 01:05:13,143 --> 01:05:15,475 Yesterday, you were out marching with the picket lines, 1171 01:05:15,477 --> 01:05:18,611 and now you're telling me about how to make $1,000,000! 1172 01:05:18,614 --> 01:05:23,350 You know, you have the loyalty of a snail! 1173 01:05:23,785 --> 01:05:25,216 What happens tomorrow, huh? 1174 01:05:25,218 --> 01:05:28,319 George Rockwell comes back from the dead, 1175 01:05:28,322 --> 01:05:29,821 and he gives you a quick hump, 1176 01:05:29,822 --> 01:05:31,187 and you're going to be telling me that they 1177 01:05:31,190 --> 01:05:34,557 should send the Negroes back to Africa? 1178 01:05:35,862 --> 01:05:37,260 That's very true. 1179 01:05:37,262 --> 01:05:37,692 What? 1180 01:05:37,695 --> 01:05:41,530 No, what you were saying about women, Harry. It's very true, really. 1181 01:05:41,532 --> 01:05:43,163 They seem to have, you know, 1182 01:05:43,166 --> 01:05:46,166 that marvelous ability to adapt to whatever man they're with. 1183 01:05:46,169 --> 01:05:50,537 That's one of their more charming traits, actually. 1184 01:05:50,541 --> 01:05:53,441 Yeah. Oh, you know about women. 1185 01:05:53,443 --> 01:05:56,010 I know you know about women. 1186 01:05:56,012 --> 01:05:57,744 I know what you know about women, 1187 01:05:57,747 --> 01:06:01,080 and I know where you know about women! 1188 01:06:01,082 --> 01:06:02,413 Well, then, you've got to admit that's 1189 01:06:02,416 --> 01:06:06,217 not a bad way to know about women, right? 1190 01:06:06,219 --> 01:06:08,218 Harry, you're making a fool of yourself. 1191 01:06:08,221 --> 01:06:11,689 Doctor, you have found the perfect girl! 1192 01:06:11,692 --> 01:06:14,793 As a matter of fact, she is your specialty. 1193 01:06:14,794 --> 01:06:16,360 The two of you belong together! 1194 01:06:16,362 --> 01:06:18,361 I hope you have a happy life! 1195 01:06:18,364 --> 01:06:19,495 And when it's all over 1196 01:06:19,499 --> 01:06:22,633 and this disloyal little girl with the hot pants 1197 01:06:22,634 --> 01:06:26,168 has run off with a 6'4" Greek dishwasher, 1198 01:06:26,170 --> 01:06:27,501 a little teeny-weeny little man is going 1199 01:06:27,504 --> 01:06:28,736 to come knocking at your door, 1200 01:06:28,738 --> 01:06:30,337 and he's going to say, "Doctor, Doctor, 1201 01:06:30,339 --> 01:06:34,340 "here's your check for $500,000 on the Keho plan," 1202 01:06:34,343 --> 01:06:37,143 which, considering the inflationary spiral, 1203 01:06:37,145 --> 01:06:38,143 buddy, should be worth just about enough 1204 01:06:38,146 --> 01:06:42,413 to grab a cab to the nearest dock where you can jump off, 1205 01:06:42,416 --> 01:06:43,747 you poor son of a bitch, 1206 01:06:43,750 --> 01:06:45,916 and drown yourself! 1207 01:06:49,389 --> 01:06:50,554 He isn't usually like this. 1208 01:06:50,555 --> 01:06:52,788 No, no, it's all right, really. 1209 01:06:52,790 --> 01:06:54,121 You're very funny, Harry. 1210 01:06:54,124 --> 01:06:56,991 A very amusing guy, really. 1211 01:06:57,727 --> 01:06:59,425 Very funny. 1212 01:07:19,780 --> 01:07:21,211 Harry, it really is exciting. 1213 01:07:21,214 --> 01:07:26,016 I mean, really tremendous, the great things that are being accomplished. 1214 01:07:26,018 --> 01:07:28,518 It was the most marvelous thing that could ever happen 1215 01:07:28,521 --> 01:07:31,521 to those poor people in the Appalachian region. 1216 01:07:31,523 --> 01:07:34,056 Sheila, it's really getting late. 1217 01:07:34,059 --> 01:07:36,792 Want me to call you a cab? 1218 01:07:37,761 --> 01:07:38,593 A cab? 1219 01:07:38,596 --> 01:07:41,329 Yeah. I'm really beat. 1220 01:07:41,465 --> 01:07:45,065 But, Harry, this is my apartment. 1221 01:07:45,267 --> 01:07:46,733 Huh? 1222 01:07:47,737 --> 01:07:49,203 Oh. 1223 01:07:49,605 --> 01:07:51,337 Oh, yeah, all right, well, listen, 1224 01:07:51,340 --> 01:07:56,875 tell me some more of the wonderful things Lyndon B. Johnson did. 1225 01:08:02,016 --> 01:08:02,881 Okay, now, listen. 1226 01:08:02,882 --> 01:08:04,614 Don't come on too strong, you know. 1227 01:08:04,618 --> 01:08:05,883 Don't be too obvious. 1228 01:08:05,885 --> 01:08:08,418 Oh, don't worry, man, I'm cool. 1229 01:08:08,419 --> 01:08:09,618 Hey, good luck. 1230 01:08:09,620 --> 01:08:11,018 No sweat. 1231 01:08:29,707 --> 01:08:33,875 Yoo-hoo, sir, I've come to take my physical. 1232 01:08:33,877 --> 01:08:34,508 Sure, honey, sure. 1233 01:08:34,510 --> 01:08:37,344 Back there with the rest of the fags. 1234 01:08:37,345 --> 01:08:39,077 Come on, let's go. 1235 01:08:39,748 --> 01:08:41,214 Hup, two, three and a four! 1236 01:08:41,215 --> 01:08:42,380 Spread your cheeks! 1237 01:08:42,383 --> 01:08:44,950 Don't get worried about the master's oral. 1238 01:08:44,952 --> 01:08:46,650 After all, there's a limit to what they can 1239 01:08:46,653 --> 01:08:50,053 put you through in a matter of three hours. 1240 01:08:50,055 --> 01:08:52,454 Where's freedom now? 1241 01:08:52,458 --> 01:08:55,825 1:00 tomorrow. Mass student meeting 1242 01:08:55,827 --> 01:08:57,126 in the Student Union Building. 1243 01:08:57,128 --> 01:09:00,662 Dr. Ramsgate will examine you in Chaucer. 1244 01:09:00,665 --> 01:09:03,398 How is your Chaucerian English? 1245 01:09:03,400 --> 01:09:04,632 Middling. 1246 01:09:04,634 --> 01:09:06,032 Oh, by the way, 1247 01:09:06,035 --> 01:09:11,438 Dr. Lysander will question you on the 20th century. 1248 01:09:12,841 --> 01:09:14,239 Be careful. 1249 01:10:33,350 --> 01:10:37,084 Nick, are you all right? Where did you get that haircut? 1250 01:10:37,086 --> 01:10:40,352 I beat it, man. I beat them. 1251 01:10:43,859 --> 01:10:45,725 You mean the fag routine worked? 1252 01:10:45,727 --> 01:10:50,662 Oh, no, no, man. They took me. But I beat it. 1253 01:10:50,665 --> 01:10:51,897 I mean, I foxed them. 1254 01:10:51,899 --> 01:10:55,700 I went next door and enlisted in the Marines. 1255 01:10:58,603 --> 01:11:00,869 At least you haven't lost your sense of humor. 1256 01:11:00,871 --> 01:11:03,237 Oh, no, no! 1257 01:11:04,041 --> 01:11:07,175 Oh, listen, man. You should see those guys. 1258 01:11:07,177 --> 01:11:07,742 They're tough. 1259 01:11:07,743 --> 01:11:12,778 Oh, boy, are they tough. Oh, and some of the guns and stuff, 1260 01:11:12,782 --> 01:11:15,682 like automatic weapons and things. 1261 01:11:15,684 --> 01:11:18,950 Oh, Harry, it is wild. 1262 01:11:19,719 --> 01:11:21,885 Gee, that's swell, Nick. 1263 01:11:21,888 --> 01:11:23,920 Look, why don't you take it easy? 1264 01:11:23,922 --> 01:11:24,754 You're on a bummer. 1265 01:11:24,757 --> 01:11:26,822 You want to lie down, you could use my bed. 1266 01:11:26,825 --> 01:11:31,827 Oh, no, no. Harry, listen. I'm straight. 1267 01:11:32,095 --> 01:11:37,932 I've even got myself signed up to train for a special job, 1268 01:11:37,934 --> 01:11:40,067 belly gunner in a helicopter, 1269 01:11:40,070 --> 01:11:42,436 John Wayne-ing it in an open door 1270 01:11:42,439 --> 01:11:44,672 with a .50-caliber machine gun. 1271 01:11:48,343 --> 01:11:53,746 Come on, Nick. Look, don't be upset. 1272 01:11:54,615 --> 01:11:55,880 I mean, we'll get you out of it. 1273 01:11:55,882 --> 01:12:00,384 We'll go down there, and we'll explain it to them. 1274 01:12:00,653 --> 01:12:02,351 You may have to go away for a couple of months. 1275 01:12:02,353 --> 01:12:05,720 Jesus Christ, what a crazy thing to do, Nick. 1276 01:12:05,723 --> 01:12:07,054 Hey, hey, wait a minute. Wait a minute. 1277 01:12:07,058 --> 01:12:11,460 What kind of a cruddy, yellow attitude is that? 1278 01:12:11,794 --> 01:12:14,261 Now, come on, Harry, this country is in trouble. 1279 01:12:14,264 --> 01:12:18,331 I mean, we could be fighting on Coney Island in just two weeks. 1280 01:12:18,333 --> 01:12:21,933 Nick, they don't want Coney Island. 1281 01:12:23,738 --> 01:12:27,038 Not since we tore down the rollercoaster. 1282 01:12:27,041 --> 01:12:31,276 You listen to me, man, we've got enemies! 1283 01:12:31,812 --> 01:12:34,878 This ain't no free ride! 1284 01:12:36,248 --> 01:12:37,447 We have got to do our duty! 1285 01:12:37,450 --> 01:12:39,650 Great. You go do your duty and come back 1286 01:12:39,652 --> 01:12:40,884 when you feel better, all right? 1287 01:12:40,885 --> 01:12:42,084 Hey, wait a minute. Now, don't you go 1288 01:12:42,086 --> 01:12:45,520 pushing me around. You understand? 1289 01:12:47,725 --> 01:12:49,824 Oh, shit. You all right? 1290 01:12:49,827 --> 01:12:55,630 Why, listen, man, I came here because I love you. 1291 01:12:56,698 --> 01:12:57,462 Are you all right? 1292 01:12:57,465 --> 01:12:59,731 I just hope you've got the guts 1293 01:12:59,733 --> 01:13:03,133 to do what you know is right, like I'm doing. 1294 01:13:03,137 --> 01:13:06,605 Nick, you're not feeling guts. 1295 01:13:06,607 --> 01:13:08,639 You can't play by your own rules, Harry. 1296 01:13:08,642 --> 01:13:10,174 We've got rules in this country. 1297 01:13:10,175 --> 01:13:12,207 Boy, you break them, you're gonna pay the price. 1298 01:13:12,211 --> 01:13:16,079 Nick, will you get the hell out of here? 1299 01:13:16,246 --> 01:13:17,277 You gotta tell them, Harry. 1300 01:13:17,280 --> 01:13:20,114 Nick, you tell them. You're doing great. 1301 01:13:20,116 --> 01:13:23,416 No! No! No! No. 1302 01:13:24,353 --> 01:13:27,720 It was your test. It's gotta come from you. 1303 01:13:27,723 --> 01:13:28,153 What? 1304 01:13:28,157 --> 01:13:31,423 You gotta tell Wilhunt that you cheated. 1305 01:13:31,426 --> 01:13:32,625 Oh, come on! 1306 01:13:32,626 --> 01:13:35,426 Harry, I can't go away and fight 1307 01:13:35,428 --> 01:13:39,963 for my country with that on my conscience. 1308 01:13:40,266 --> 01:13:43,166 Now, if you don't do it, I'm gonna have to. 1309 01:13:43,168 --> 01:13:45,034 Nick, you're out of your mind. 1310 01:13:45,036 --> 01:13:46,902 You're going to get me expelled. 1311 01:13:46,903 --> 01:13:49,936 Well, I don't have any choice. 1312 01:13:49,940 --> 01:13:54,875 Harry, I made a commitment to decency today. 1313 01:13:54,878 --> 01:13:58,079 Oh, Jesus, it feels good. 1314 01:13:59,181 --> 01:14:01,648 Now, you think about that. 1315 01:14:02,084 --> 01:14:04,149 Nick! 1316 01:14:04,218 --> 01:14:06,283 You're not going to tell them? 1317 01:14:06,286 --> 01:14:10,854 Well, I'm sure I won't have to, Harry, 'cause I got faith in you. 1318 01:14:10,857 --> 01:14:13,123 - Action now! Action now! - Action now! 1319 01:14:13,125 --> 01:14:14,057 Action now! Action now! Action now! 1320 01:14:14,059 --> 01:14:17,527 Harry, Harry, listen, man, you gotta keep that goddamn friend 1321 01:14:17,528 --> 01:14:20,160 of yours away from me 'cause next time I see him, I'm going to bust him. 1322 01:14:20,164 --> 01:14:22,931 Who? What? I don't know who you're... Nick Philbert. 1323 01:14:22,932 --> 01:14:23,629 When did you see Nick? 1324 01:14:23,632 --> 01:14:24,931 About 10 minutes ago, man. He's crazy. 1325 01:14:24,933 --> 01:14:26,866 He's trying to get me kicked out of the Art Department 1326 01:14:26,868 --> 01:14:28,233 for subversive painting. 1327 01:14:28,236 --> 01:14:29,934 Oh, Christ. He's really flipped. 1328 01:14:29,938 --> 01:14:33,406 I mean, My Wife's Ass is a subversive painting? 1329 01:14:33,407 --> 01:14:37,007 Action now! Action now! Action now! 1330 01:14:37,010 --> 01:14:39,442 Action now! Action now! Action now! Action now! 1331 01:14:39,446 --> 01:14:41,913 Action now! Action now! Action now! Action now! 1332 01:14:41,914 --> 01:14:44,580 Action now! Action now! Action now! Action now! 1333 01:14:44,584 --> 01:14:48,085 Action now! Action now! Action now! 1334 01:14:48,086 --> 01:14:50,853 Action now! Action now! Action now! 1335 01:14:50,856 --> 01:14:55,058 Action now! Action now! Action now! 1336 01:14:55,060 --> 01:14:56,225 Action now! Action now! 1337 01:14:56,226 --> 01:14:57,391 Come on! More! More! 1338 01:14:57,394 --> 01:15:00,495 Action now! Action now! Action now! 1339 01:15:00,496 --> 01:15:02,028 Action now! Action now... 1340 01:15:02,030 --> 01:15:03,695 Action now! Action now... 1341 01:15:15,475 --> 01:15:18,275 Pigs go home! Pigs go home! 1342 01:15:18,277 --> 01:15:21,077 Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! 1343 01:15:21,080 --> 01:15:23,647 Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! 1344 01:15:23,649 --> 01:15:26,315 Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! 1345 01:15:26,318 --> 01:15:29,085 Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! 1346 01:15:29,086 --> 01:15:31,819 Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! 1347 01:15:31,823 --> 01:15:34,590 Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! 1348 01:15:34,591 --> 01:15:37,290 Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! 1349 01:15:37,293 --> 01:15:40,226 Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! 1350 01:15:40,229 --> 01:15:43,963 Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! 1351 01:15:44,333 --> 01:15:46,632 Hi. How are you? 1352 01:15:48,437 --> 01:15:50,970 How's everything going? 1353 01:15:52,039 --> 01:15:55,072 Piggy, piggy, piggy. Piggy, pig. 1354 01:15:55,074 --> 01:15:59,242 Piggy, piggy, piggy. Piggy, piggy, piggy. 1355 01:16:04,916 --> 01:16:09,951 Keep your line straight and push them back to the stairs. 1356 01:16:11,589 --> 01:16:13,621 Move them back. 1357 01:16:16,126 --> 01:16:17,891 Keep your line straight. 1358 01:16:17,893 --> 01:16:21,094 Push them back down the stairs. 1359 01:16:21,496 --> 01:16:23,729 Down the stairs. 1360 01:16:24,632 --> 01:16:28,066 How much are you getting paid to break in heads today? 1361 01:16:28,067 --> 01:16:32,668 Have you been practicing on your wife and kids? 1362 01:16:33,305 --> 01:16:37,606 Say, do you know what fascism means, huh, piggy? 1363 01:16:37,609 --> 01:16:40,609 You're mine and I want you, baby. 1364 01:16:59,294 --> 01:17:02,828 This is a peaceful demonstration! 1365 01:17:06,834 --> 01:17:11,101 This is a peaceful demonstration! 1366 01:18:01,652 --> 01:18:05,787 This is a peaceful demonstration! 1367 01:18:28,110 --> 01:18:31,211 Tear gas, fire! 1368 01:18:31,746 --> 01:18:33,912 Get your gas masks on! 1369 01:18:33,914 --> 01:18:36,647 Get your gas masks on! 1370 01:18:42,155 --> 01:18:45,656 This is a peaceful demonstration! 1371 01:18:45,658 --> 01:18:47,690 Please, please, stop, leave him! 1372 01:18:47,693 --> 01:18:50,125 Stop, leave him! He's my friend! 1373 01:18:50,129 --> 01:18:54,063 You stupid bastard! You stupid... 1374 01:19:13,885 --> 01:19:17,720 This is a peaceful demonstration! 1375 01:20:29,959 --> 01:20:31,290 Jan! 1376 01:20:34,061 --> 01:20:36,928 Hey, have you seen Jan? 1377 01:20:41,101 --> 01:20:42,732 Jan! 1378 01:20:43,901 --> 01:20:45,367 Jan! 1379 01:21:24,075 --> 01:21:25,007 Jan. 1380 01:21:33,683 --> 01:21:37,283 Oh, my poor baby. 1381 01:21:42,992 --> 01:21:45,125 Oh, Jan. 1382 01:21:46,228 --> 01:21:50,229 Oh, my poor baby, Jan. 1383 01:21:58,005 --> 01:21:59,103 Harry. 1384 01:21:59,106 --> 01:22:01,138 Oh, Jan. 1385 01:22:51,691 --> 01:22:54,323 That was great. 1386 01:22:56,628 --> 01:23:00,062 That was just great. 1387 01:23:01,699 --> 01:23:05,233 It's always just great with you. 1388 01:23:07,336 --> 01:23:10,302 Better than with the gynecologist? 1389 01:23:10,305 --> 01:23:10,936 Wait a minute, 1390 01:23:10,938 --> 01:23:15,373 you don't have to answer that. I didn't mean that. 1391 01:23:15,743 --> 01:23:16,874 I know you didn't. 1392 01:23:16,876 --> 01:23:18,408 I didn't. 1393 01:23:18,777 --> 01:23:23,678 I guess you said a lot of things that you didn't mean. 1394 01:23:24,048 --> 01:23:27,314 Like me being a snail and a WASP. 1395 01:23:27,317 --> 01:23:30,751 Jesus, I really get crazy, don't I? 1396 01:23:31,588 --> 01:23:32,219 Uh-huh. 1397 01:23:32,221 --> 01:23:35,221 But it doesn't matter. So do I. 1398 01:23:35,389 --> 01:23:36,186 Yeah. 1399 01:23:36,190 --> 01:23:39,557 You really learned a lot from me. 1400 01:23:41,094 --> 01:23:43,027 I mean, I knew you didn't give a damn 1401 01:23:43,029 --> 01:23:46,362 for that idiot Dr. Greengrass. 1402 01:23:46,464 --> 01:23:50,866 By the way, look, I'm curious... 1403 01:23:51,536 --> 01:23:52,634 Did you sleep with him? 1404 01:23:52,636 --> 01:23:55,669 No, no, no, don't tell me, don't tell me. 1405 01:23:55,673 --> 01:23:57,672 I'm doing it again. 1406 01:23:57,675 --> 01:24:00,876 I mean, I knew it was all just a rebellion against me. 1407 01:24:00,878 --> 01:24:03,310 You know, like your big interest in the protest thing, 1408 01:24:03,312 --> 01:24:07,613 it was all just a reaction to my being a bully, 1409 01:24:07,616 --> 01:24:11,818 and trying to manipulate your mind, right? 1410 01:24:13,755 --> 01:24:14,819 Wrong. 1411 01:24:14,822 --> 01:24:16,721 You did sleep with Greengrass. 1412 01:24:16,723 --> 01:24:19,155 I do care about the protest. 1413 01:24:19,159 --> 01:24:21,525 And if you had been there and seen those kids 1414 01:24:21,527 --> 01:24:22,792 and everything they went through, 1415 01:24:22,795 --> 01:24:24,193 and those cops and what they did... 1416 01:24:24,195 --> 01:24:24,959 Yeah, I know, I know. 1417 01:24:24,963 --> 01:24:26,695 It was awful. They were having a ball. 1418 01:24:26,698 --> 01:24:30,365 Having a ball? Having their heads cracked open, 1419 01:24:30,367 --> 01:24:32,567 having their eyes burned out with Mace, 1420 01:24:32,570 --> 01:24:36,138 being dragged by their hair to police wagons? 1421 01:24:36,140 --> 01:24:37,505 If you had been there... 1422 01:24:37,507 --> 01:24:38,204 I was there. 1423 01:24:38,207 --> 01:24:40,807 I was there. I saw everything. 1424 01:24:40,809 --> 01:24:42,207 Well, then, how can you not care? 1425 01:24:42,211 --> 01:24:47,080 I mean, how can you of all people be so insensitive? 1426 01:24:47,082 --> 01:24:50,983 How can you be so cavalier? It was ugly! 1427 01:24:50,985 --> 01:24:52,818 It was sexy. 1428 01:24:52,819 --> 01:24:54,584 Sexy? 1429 01:24:55,087 --> 01:24:56,419 Sexy. 1430 01:24:56,422 --> 01:24:58,288 Okay, get out your notebook. 1431 01:24:58,291 --> 01:24:59,556 For three units, Riots 1A. 1432 01:24:59,558 --> 01:25:03,092 Jan, do you think you're the only one who got laid tonight? 1433 01:25:03,094 --> 01:25:04,393 Oh, you bastard, you! 1434 01:25:04,395 --> 01:25:05,594 Oh, come on, honey, come on. 1435 01:25:05,595 --> 01:25:09,063 I mean, all those boys and girls running and jumping and kicking 1436 01:25:09,065 --> 01:25:11,565 and squealing and tearing and pulling. 1437 01:25:11,568 --> 01:25:13,134 I mean, after the riots at the Sorbonne, 1438 01:25:13,136 --> 01:25:14,501 I could not stand up for two weeks, 1439 01:25:14,504 --> 01:25:17,705 and I didn't get within 500 feet of a cop. 1440 01:25:17,707 --> 01:25:18,939 Same thing at Berkeley. 1441 01:25:18,940 --> 01:25:21,239 Jan, when you came running in here tonight, 1442 01:25:21,242 --> 01:25:23,141 you were so turned on, you nearly slid out 1443 01:25:23,143 --> 01:25:26,377 of bed twice before I could even kiss you. 1444 01:25:26,379 --> 01:25:30,313 That's it. Finished. It's all over. 1445 01:25:30,316 --> 01:25:33,417 Oh, come on, honey, don't take me so literally. 1446 01:25:33,420 --> 01:25:35,319 That's it! That's it! 1447 01:25:35,321 --> 01:25:38,755 Come on, honey, don't take me so literally. 1448 01:25:38,756 --> 01:25:39,988 Will you come on back to bed? 1449 01:25:39,990 --> 01:25:43,256 Harry, I'd rather get back in bed with a eunuch! 1450 01:25:43,259 --> 01:25:44,991 Dr. Greengrass? 1451 01:25:45,594 --> 01:25:49,462 Hardly. At least when I leave his apartment I feel like a woman. 1452 01:25:49,464 --> 01:25:53,032 Woman? You're not a woman! 1453 01:25:53,201 --> 01:25:57,736 You're just a guy with a hole in the middle! 1454 01:26:06,578 --> 01:26:09,779 Thank God I don't love her. 1455 01:26:11,783 --> 01:26:15,483 Harry, Vandenburg wants you, and you're acceptable with the students, 1456 01:26:15,485 --> 01:26:16,182 so what's the problem? 1457 01:26:16,185 --> 01:26:19,052 The problem is it's a rotten thankless job, and I don't want to do it. 1458 01:26:19,054 --> 01:26:21,686 So, what's so difficult? You take the kids' requests, 1459 01:26:21,689 --> 01:26:22,521 and you take it to Vandenburg. 1460 01:26:22,524 --> 01:26:24,757 Wade, I got my master's oral tomorrow. 1461 01:26:24,759 --> 01:26:26,258 Look, it's an hour of your time. 1462 01:26:26,259 --> 01:26:28,092 I promise you it'll be quick and easy. 1463 01:26:28,095 --> 01:26:30,962 Look, if it's that easy, why don't you do it? 1464 01:26:30,964 --> 01:26:32,129 They don't trust me, Harry. 1465 01:26:32,130 --> 01:26:35,096 These kids don't trust anybody. 1466 01:26:40,071 --> 01:26:42,938 I can't imagine why. 1467 01:26:58,287 --> 01:27:02,789 And so, to the brave little band who made it here today, 1468 01:27:02,790 --> 01:27:05,557 I'd like to wish you all good luck next semester. 1469 01:27:05,560 --> 01:27:10,228 Hup, two, three, four. Hup, two, three, four. 1470 01:27:10,230 --> 01:27:13,163 If there is a next semester. 1471 01:27:13,166 --> 01:27:16,066 I think that concludes our business. 1472 01:27:16,068 --> 01:27:16,765 Except for Mr. Garcia. 1473 01:27:16,768 --> 01:27:19,635 Remember, I need that book report by the close of the day. 1474 01:27:19,637 --> 01:27:21,702 Yeah, you're gonna get it, Mr. Bailey. 1475 01:27:21,706 --> 01:27:22,671 I'm writing it right now. 1476 01:27:22,673 --> 01:27:25,406 As soon as I finish the last chapter. 1477 01:27:25,409 --> 01:27:28,977 Hey, don't laugh. That's good stuff. 1478 01:27:31,113 --> 01:27:34,647 I'll give it back to you, Garcia. 1479 01:27:34,649 --> 01:27:36,347 Wow. 1480 01:27:39,486 --> 01:27:41,518 Man, these things were my passion! 1481 01:27:41,521 --> 01:27:44,220 I used to lie in bed under the blankets, 1482 01:27:44,224 --> 01:27:45,389 and read them with my flashlight. 1483 01:27:45,390 --> 01:27:51,693 And it wasn't till years later that I found out why I really dug them. 1484 01:27:51,797 --> 01:27:53,663 You know, there's a definite similarity 1485 01:27:53,665 --> 01:27:56,165 between the crusading of a Batman, 1486 01:27:56,166 --> 01:27:58,933 or Captain Marvel, or Red Ryder, 1487 01:27:58,936 --> 01:28:01,403 and the heroics of Don Quixote. 1488 01:28:01,405 --> 01:28:04,506 It's that 19th-century romanticism 1489 01:28:04,507 --> 01:28:07,975 that 20th-century heroes are made of. 1490 01:28:11,281 --> 01:28:14,048 You finish that, Garcia. 1491 01:28:22,058 --> 01:28:25,592 Get the uniforms off this campus. 1492 01:28:34,335 --> 01:28:37,469 Well, Harry, up the rebels. They've won. 1493 01:28:37,470 --> 01:28:42,339 Some of those old biddies on the board put up a pretty good fight. 1494 01:28:42,341 --> 01:28:44,274 But hell, I don't mind a fight. 1495 01:28:44,276 --> 01:28:47,510 Really surprised me, though, when they came through. 1496 01:28:47,512 --> 01:28:51,013 That's great, sir. That's marvelous. 1497 01:28:51,016 --> 01:28:54,851 Have you ever spent four hours trying to convince a man 1498 01:28:54,853 --> 01:28:59,055 who owns five barber shops, with a mentality to match, 1499 01:28:59,057 --> 01:29:02,825 that he was once 18 years old himself? 1500 01:29:02,826 --> 01:29:05,759 Oh, yes, sir. About 10 years ago. 1501 01:29:05,762 --> 01:29:08,094 It was my father. 1502 01:29:08,097 --> 01:29:08,929 Who won the argument? 1503 01:29:08,932 --> 01:29:12,099 Well, I'm still smoking, sir. 1504 01:29:13,135 --> 01:29:14,266 It's too late for us. 1505 01:29:14,268 --> 01:29:16,300 But don't let your kids smoke, Harry. 1506 01:29:16,304 --> 01:29:19,471 Oh, that's right, sir. I certainly won't. 1507 01:29:19,472 --> 01:29:20,671 Well, let's get to it, 1508 01:29:20,673 --> 01:29:22,338 so that hopefully we can get back 1509 01:29:22,341 --> 01:29:24,073 to the dull business of education. 1510 01:29:24,076 --> 01:29:29,678 Now, on the coeducational restrictions in the dorms. 1511 01:29:29,748 --> 01:29:31,480 Beginning this coming semester, 1512 01:29:31,482 --> 01:29:34,215 we are raising the weekday curfews 1513 01:29:34,219 --> 01:29:36,485 one whole hour. 1514 01:29:37,320 --> 01:29:37,851 An hour? 1515 01:29:37,854 --> 01:29:41,655 Number two, the Black Studies courses on campus 1516 01:29:41,657 --> 01:29:45,024 are, of course, an impractical project, 1517 01:29:45,027 --> 01:29:47,760 financially and otherwise, at this time. 1518 01:29:47,762 --> 01:29:49,294 Nevertheless, there is every indication 1519 01:29:49,297 --> 01:29:53,031 that we can initiate a Negro History Week in the foreseeable future. 1520 01:29:53,033 --> 01:29:55,299 Number three, lowering the academic 1521 01:29:55,301 --> 01:29:57,366 requirements for the minority groups. 1522 01:29:57,370 --> 01:30:00,504 Beginning next summer, five Negro students 1523 01:30:00,505 --> 01:30:06,407 and five Mexican Americans will receive half-scholarships. 1524 01:30:06,411 --> 01:30:08,544 Now, that was the real battle, 1525 01:30:08,545 --> 01:30:09,810 but when I pointed out to them that 1526 01:30:09,812 --> 01:30:13,713 we could pick top athletes out of this group, 1527 01:30:13,716 --> 01:30:15,882 that was the butter in the frying pan. 1528 01:30:15,884 --> 01:30:16,515 We got it. 1529 01:30:16,517 --> 01:30:19,751 Didn't think we could win that one, 1530 01:30:20,586 --> 01:30:21,951 did you, Harry? 1531 01:30:21,954 --> 01:30:23,520 You're crazy. 1532 01:30:25,725 --> 01:30:28,391 I said you're crazy. 1533 01:30:28,393 --> 01:30:31,861 Are you feeling all right, Harry? 1534 01:30:31,864 --> 01:30:34,097 It's too late for these answers. 1535 01:30:34,099 --> 01:30:35,665 20 years too late. 1536 01:30:35,666 --> 01:30:37,398 Harry, this is a very reasonable 1537 01:30:37,402 --> 01:30:39,701 and generous set of counterproposals, 1538 01:30:39,704 --> 01:30:43,472 and it's the best they're going to get. 1539 01:30:45,775 --> 01:30:50,076 I feel like Lafayette in the court of Louis XVI. 1540 01:30:50,080 --> 01:30:52,680 I understand, Harry. Don't be nervous. 1541 01:30:52,682 --> 01:30:55,282 No, that's not what I meant. 1542 01:30:55,284 --> 01:30:59,753 The peasants are ready to burn down Versailles, 1543 01:30:59,888 --> 01:31:01,319 storm the Bastille, 1544 01:31:01,321 --> 01:31:05,489 and overturn the French monarchy, 1545 01:31:05,491 --> 01:31:08,157 and you are telling me 1546 01:31:08,560 --> 01:31:11,160 that if I go back to them 1547 01:31:11,162 --> 01:31:14,730 and tell them that 50 of them 1548 01:31:15,100 --> 01:31:20,870 can come to the next costume ball at the palace, 1549 01:31:22,205 --> 01:31:26,239 they'll keep quiet for another 100 years. 1550 01:31:27,444 --> 01:31:31,279 It's too late for those kind of answers. 1551 01:31:31,280 --> 01:31:35,415 You'll drive them crazy, Dr. Vandenburg. 1552 01:31:35,417 --> 01:31:37,182 They'll burn down your school! 1553 01:31:37,185 --> 01:31:42,187 You are turning them into full-scale revolutionaries. 1554 01:31:42,191 --> 01:31:44,724 Do you really believe we're going to turn 1555 01:31:44,726 --> 01:31:46,225 this school over to a bunch of kids 1556 01:31:46,226 --> 01:31:48,892 who pay a few hundred dollars a year nominal tuition 1557 01:31:48,895 --> 01:31:52,896 and that that qualifies them to run a university that has produced 1558 01:31:52,900 --> 01:31:54,331 four governors, three senators 1559 01:31:54,333 --> 01:31:56,732 and a president of the United States? 1560 01:31:56,735 --> 01:31:58,066 Dr. Vandenburg... 1561 01:31:58,070 --> 01:32:00,670 Harry, I am a liberal man! 1562 01:32:00,672 --> 01:32:02,271 A liberal, enlightened man 1563 01:32:02,273 --> 01:32:05,474 who has, I hope, the courage, when the chips are down, 1564 01:32:05,475 --> 01:32:08,508 not to be intimidated by a misguided mob 1565 01:32:08,512 --> 01:32:13,047 of pseudo-political novices with inflamed literary imaginations! 1566 01:32:13,049 --> 01:32:13,780 Please, stop it! 1567 01:32:13,783 --> 01:32:15,815 Stop it! Stop it! Some day you'll thank me! 1568 01:32:15,817 --> 01:32:19,051 Please, listen to me! Stop it! 1569 01:32:19,854 --> 01:32:22,920 You've been a naval commander. 1570 01:32:23,156 --> 01:32:25,022 You are a doctor. 1571 01:32:25,023 --> 01:32:27,689 You have a PhD in history. 1572 01:32:27,693 --> 01:32:29,959 Why haven't you learned anything? 1573 01:32:29,961 --> 01:32:35,664 It's all there, it's all there in Toynbee and those books on the shelf! 1574 01:32:35,665 --> 01:32:38,297 Suppression breeds violence! 1575 01:32:38,300 --> 01:32:41,366 You're going to raise the curfew an hour? 1576 01:32:41,370 --> 01:32:43,335 Will you look outside? 1577 01:32:44,438 --> 01:32:46,403 You see that kid? 1578 01:32:46,406 --> 01:32:48,672 Last week he just wanted to get laid! 1579 01:32:48,674 --> 01:32:52,074 Now he wants to kill somebody! 1580 01:32:52,478 --> 01:32:54,077 Pigs, go home! 1581 01:32:56,047 --> 01:32:58,614 You should have let him get laid! 1582 01:32:58,616 --> 01:33:00,549 Is this the issue? 1583 01:33:00,551 --> 01:33:04,852 Yes, freedom of choice is an issue! 1584 01:33:04,855 --> 01:33:08,389 Hypocrisy, sexual or otherwise, is an issue! 1585 01:33:08,391 --> 01:33:11,925 That's right! Let them run wild. 1586 01:33:11,926 --> 01:33:13,725 Five men on our board of regents 1587 01:33:13,727 --> 01:33:15,726 have daughters who go to this school. 1588 01:33:15,729 --> 01:33:16,594 What do you want me to tell them? 1589 01:33:16,597 --> 01:33:18,562 Go read Kinsey and Havelock Ellis? 1590 01:33:18,565 --> 01:33:19,730 What are you holding onto? 1591 01:33:19,731 --> 01:33:25,100 This university is just a small piece of the rest of the world! 1592 01:33:25,104 --> 01:33:28,672 The only way it's going to survive is if it changes! 1593 01:33:28,674 --> 01:33:30,240 If you didn't want them to think, 1594 01:33:30,242 --> 01:33:33,142 you shouldn't have given them library cards! 1595 01:33:33,144 --> 01:33:34,643 Now it's too late! 1596 01:33:34,644 --> 01:33:38,344 Harry, I am not giving them this school! 1597 01:33:38,348 --> 01:33:39,779 They don't want your school, 1598 01:33:39,781 --> 01:33:43,015 they just want a say in determining their future! 1599 01:33:43,017 --> 01:33:45,550 Then first let them learn to obey the law. 1600 01:33:45,553 --> 01:33:47,452 First let them ask if your laws are just. 1601 01:33:47,454 --> 01:33:50,821 Do you think people should be allowed to decide for themselves 1602 01:33:50,824 --> 01:33:53,024 whether a law is just? Why, that's anarchy. 1603 01:33:53,026 --> 01:33:55,493 This nation was founded on law and order. 1604 01:33:55,494 --> 01:33:59,262 Bullshit! This nation was born out of disorder 1605 01:33:59,265 --> 01:34:03,735 and founded on freedom and the will of the people! 1606 01:34:03,737 --> 01:34:06,337 People need guidance, Harry. 1607 01:34:06,339 --> 01:34:07,670 Give them what they want today, 1608 01:34:07,673 --> 01:34:10,140 and what will they ask for next, tomorrow? 1609 01:34:10,141 --> 01:34:14,142 I don't know. Maybe a 40-hour week. 1610 01:34:14,146 --> 01:34:15,177 Maybe the vote for women. 1611 01:34:15,180 --> 01:34:18,014 What difference does it make? 1612 01:34:18,016 --> 01:34:19,414 Will you let go? 1613 01:34:19,417 --> 01:34:24,986 Let go! Stop trying to hold back the hands of the clock! 1614 01:34:24,989 --> 01:34:27,889 It'll tear your arms out! 1615 01:34:34,030 --> 01:34:35,963 Go on, Harry. 1616 01:34:36,298 --> 01:34:38,431 Take it to them. 1617 01:34:38,732 --> 01:34:40,797 Just as it is. 1618 01:34:41,967 --> 01:34:43,866 You'll see. 1619 01:34:45,302 --> 01:34:46,901 Go on. 1620 01:34:58,614 --> 01:35:00,113 Harry. 1621 01:35:02,150 --> 01:35:03,716 We're not unreasonable men. 1622 01:35:03,719 --> 01:35:06,652 We're not as square as you might think. 1623 01:35:08,490 --> 01:35:10,289 This university may be a tower, 1624 01:35:10,290 --> 01:35:12,757 but it's not made out of ivory. 1625 01:35:12,760 --> 01:35:15,092 This won't be the first time in your Toynbee's history there 1626 01:35:15,095 --> 01:35:19,230 that a bunch of basically good kids with hyperthyroid convictions 1627 01:35:19,232 --> 01:35:22,766 thought they were going to save the world. 1628 01:35:22,767 --> 01:35:25,800 I understand their problems. 1629 01:35:26,904 --> 01:35:28,936 I share them. 1630 01:35:29,941 --> 01:35:31,540 Go on. 1631 01:35:32,309 --> 01:35:34,842 Take it to them. 1632 01:35:46,052 --> 01:35:50,788 They will not cheat us out of our rights and our responsibilities. 1633 01:35:50,791 --> 01:35:54,592 This is our university. This is our country. 1634 01:35:54,593 --> 01:36:00,096 And we will not let them rob us of our futures. 1635 01:36:00,098 --> 01:36:06,334 They will learn if they try, that we will not be silent any longer! 1636 01:36:11,743 --> 01:36:12,874 Pigs go home! Pigs go home! 1637 01:36:12,876 --> 01:36:15,609 Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! 1638 01:36:15,613 --> 01:36:18,180 Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! 1639 01:36:18,182 --> 01:36:20,982 Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! 1640 01:36:20,983 --> 01:36:23,382 Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! Pigs go home! 1641 01:36:23,386 --> 01:36:24,784 That's the scene here as tempers 1642 01:36:24,786 --> 01:36:26,785 and tensions continue to build. 1643 01:36:26,788 --> 01:36:29,754 There's one bright note on this troubled campus, 1644 01:36:29,757 --> 01:36:32,657 and that is tomorrow the current semester ends. 1645 01:36:32,659 --> 01:36:36,427 Let's hope that when school reopens here next Monday, 1646 01:36:36,430 --> 01:36:39,264 reason will once again prevail. 1647 01:36:39,265 --> 01:36:42,833 Today in Vietnam, American... 1648 01:36:45,304 --> 01:36:48,337 Pretty good color, isn't it? 1649 01:36:58,650 --> 01:36:59,882 I suppose you think 1650 01:36:59,885 --> 01:37:04,053 I've called you here to put you through some rigmarole about 1651 01:37:04,055 --> 01:37:08,756 classroom progress reports and student attendance. 1652 01:37:09,725 --> 01:37:12,225 Something you consider an utter waste of time. 1653 01:37:12,228 --> 01:37:13,827 No, not a waste of time, Dr. Wilhunt. 1654 01:37:13,829 --> 01:37:16,228 Do you want to start with the tardies? 1655 01:37:18,032 --> 01:37:22,366 Are you quite sure that you want to make a career of teaching, Harry? 1656 01:37:22,369 --> 01:37:24,000 Yes, I'm quite sure I want to make 1657 01:37:24,003 --> 01:37:25,368 a career of teaching, Dr. Wilhunt. 1658 01:37:25,370 --> 01:37:28,436 That's a shame, because I'm utterly convinced 1659 01:37:28,440 --> 01:37:30,306 that you'll never be a good teacher. 1660 01:37:30,307 --> 01:37:33,441 You'd be a disgrace to the profession. 1661 01:37:35,445 --> 01:37:36,744 Why? 1662 01:37:36,746 --> 01:37:39,513 Because you're dishonest. 1663 01:37:39,949 --> 01:37:44,183 This is your audio-visual exam booklet. 1664 01:37:50,992 --> 01:37:53,125 Nick Philbert's a deeply disturbed human being. 1665 01:37:53,126 --> 01:37:55,758 You'd know that if you talked to him. 1666 01:37:58,230 --> 01:38:00,029 Of course, I could see that he was upset. 1667 01:38:00,032 --> 01:38:03,699 That doesn't alter the fact that that printing isn't yours. 1668 01:38:03,702 --> 01:38:06,401 Look, Dr. Wilhunt. Dr. Wilhunt. Let me... 1669 01:38:06,403 --> 01:38:09,703 Dr. Wilhunt, you know what a farce this visual-aids course is. 1670 01:38:09,706 --> 01:38:11,337 If you like, I can take the exam again 1671 01:38:11,340 --> 01:38:12,639 right now and get a better grade 1672 01:38:12,641 --> 01:38:14,272 than this maniac did in the booklet. 1673 01:38:14,275 --> 01:38:15,841 Please let me prove it to you. 1674 01:38:15,843 --> 01:38:16,741 You miss the point, Harry. 1675 01:38:16,744 --> 01:38:19,344 I don't doubt your cleverness. 1676 01:38:19,346 --> 01:38:20,611 It's your integrity. 1677 01:38:20,613 --> 01:38:22,979 The fact is you cheated on the exam. 1678 01:38:22,981 --> 01:38:24,746 Right! Right! You're right! 1679 01:38:24,750 --> 01:38:26,249 I did cheat on that exam. 1680 01:38:26,250 --> 01:38:27,314 You're absolutely right. 1681 01:38:27,317 --> 01:38:29,817 Congratulations, I cheated on the exam. 1682 01:38:29,819 --> 01:38:31,652 You have saved the system. 1683 01:38:31,655 --> 01:38:33,454 So what if another witch is burned at the stake? 1684 01:38:33,455 --> 01:38:35,588 But you know something, you don't fool me. 1685 01:38:35,591 --> 01:38:36,423 You don't fool me, Dr. Wilhunt. 1686 01:38:36,424 --> 01:38:40,425 I'm not being crucified because of this visual-aids test, 1687 01:38:40,429 --> 01:38:42,262 I'm getting wiped out because I wouldn't 1688 01:38:42,263 --> 01:38:43,462 pay homage to your great scheme 1689 01:38:43,464 --> 01:38:46,231 of assembly-line mechanical teaching methods. 1690 01:38:46,234 --> 01:38:49,567 I wouldn't work in this ridiculous... 1691 01:38:49,570 --> 01:38:52,636 This ridiculous robot factory. 1692 01:38:53,139 --> 01:38:54,804 You're overreacting, Harry. 1693 01:38:54,807 --> 01:38:55,571 I'm not overreacting. 1694 01:38:55,573 --> 01:38:59,341 Contrary to what it is convenient for you to believe, 1695 01:38:59,344 --> 01:39:02,010 I am not Mephistopheles. 1696 01:39:02,279 --> 01:39:04,911 I don't want to ruin your life. 1697 01:39:04,914 --> 01:39:08,048 I'm not going to turn you in. 1698 01:39:09,316 --> 01:39:11,348 Unless I have to. 1699 01:39:13,253 --> 01:39:14,218 Then what do you want me to do? 1700 01:39:14,220 --> 01:39:17,153 I want you to resign from the Education Department. 1701 01:39:17,156 --> 01:39:21,824 I just don't want you to have a teaching credential. 1702 01:39:22,626 --> 01:39:24,257 Go get your master's. 1703 01:39:24,260 --> 01:39:25,625 Teach at the university. 1704 01:39:25,629 --> 01:39:27,862 But stay out of my department. 1705 01:39:27,863 --> 01:39:31,698 You're dangerous. You just don't fit in. 1706 01:39:32,268 --> 01:39:36,302 You really do believe in what you're doing, don't you? 1707 01:39:36,304 --> 01:39:38,036 You're a fool! You know, you're a fool. 1708 01:39:38,040 --> 01:39:39,973 You're not a monster, you're a... 1709 01:39:39,975 --> 01:39:41,174 Of course not, Harry. 1710 01:39:41,175 --> 01:39:45,476 Harry, we're none of us monsters. 1711 01:39:45,580 --> 01:39:47,746 Not even you. 1712 01:39:47,748 --> 01:39:49,981 But my class, what about my class? 1713 01:39:49,982 --> 01:39:50,814 Oh, it will be taken care of. 1714 01:39:50,817 --> 01:39:54,884 I've got the grade book, and the final papers are all in. 1715 01:39:54,886 --> 01:39:57,052 Dr. Wilhunt. 1716 01:40:01,992 --> 01:40:03,791 I love children. 1717 01:40:05,528 --> 01:40:08,395 That's not enough, Harry. 1718 01:40:54,609 --> 01:40:57,542 Harry, could I come in? I would like to talk to you. 1719 01:40:57,545 --> 01:40:58,876 I've made a decision. 1720 01:40:58,878 --> 01:40:59,476 Jan, please. 1721 01:40:59,479 --> 01:41:01,011 I'm in terrible trouble. And if I start talking to you, 1722 01:41:01,013 --> 01:41:04,646 I know we're going to have an insane fight, and I don't want to fight. 1723 01:41:04,649 --> 01:41:07,416 Because, look, it's always my fault, I admit that, 1724 01:41:07,417 --> 01:41:09,382 but my guts ache when it's over. 1725 01:41:09,385 --> 01:41:11,618 I want to talk to you, Jan. I really want to talk to you, 1726 01:41:11,620 --> 01:41:15,220 but it has to be tomorrow. I got to study tonight. 1727 01:41:17,091 --> 01:41:19,624 Harry, it's important. 1728 01:41:20,360 --> 01:41:24,495 I'm... Sure. I'm sorry. Come on in for a second. 1729 01:41:37,710 --> 01:41:38,741 Harry, what's wrong? 1730 01:41:38,745 --> 01:41:43,079 Nothing, really. It's the pressure, I guess. You know, I mean, 1731 01:41:43,082 --> 01:41:47,016 tomorrow's the big day, and I got my oral. 1732 01:41:47,818 --> 01:41:48,882 What did you want to tell me? 1733 01:41:48,886 --> 01:41:50,185 Harry, you look terrible. 1734 01:41:50,187 --> 01:41:51,386 What's the matter? 1735 01:41:51,387 --> 01:41:52,953 Nothing. 1736 01:41:54,890 --> 01:41:58,190 It's nothing that won't go away. 1737 01:42:01,462 --> 01:42:02,893 Here, read this. 1738 01:42:02,897 --> 01:42:06,131 I think you'll get a kick out of it. 1739 01:42:06,399 --> 01:42:08,798 Oh, yeah. Garcia. 1740 01:42:14,940 --> 01:42:17,407 "I finished Batman. 1741 01:42:23,614 --> 01:42:27,482 "And because of what Mr. Bailey say, 1742 01:42:28,886 --> 01:42:34,889 "I go to the library and read Don Quixote. 1743 01:42:36,659 --> 01:42:39,159 "He better than Batman. 1744 01:42:39,729 --> 01:42:41,662 "He braver." 1745 01:42:42,096 --> 01:42:44,061 Oh, Harry. 1746 01:42:44,265 --> 01:42:47,499 That's so beautiful. 1747 01:42:50,670 --> 01:42:53,504 He really understood. 1748 01:42:55,206 --> 01:42:56,705 Yeah. 1749 01:43:00,410 --> 01:43:03,010 But it's all over now. 1750 01:43:04,347 --> 01:43:08,614 I got booted out of the Education Department. 1751 01:43:10,285 --> 01:43:13,052 How? Wilhunt. 1752 01:43:13,454 --> 01:43:16,555 Nick Philbert took a test for... 1753 01:43:16,556 --> 01:43:19,255 I let him take a test. 1754 01:43:19,258 --> 01:43:21,257 You know me. 1755 01:43:21,560 --> 01:43:25,260 Self-destructive Harry Bailey. 1756 01:43:26,698 --> 01:43:28,831 And now I'm out. 1757 01:43:30,234 --> 01:43:32,333 You mean you can't go back? 1758 01:43:32,337 --> 01:43:32,767 Yeah. 1759 01:43:32,770 --> 01:43:37,805 I can get my master's if I pass the oral tomorrow. 1760 01:43:37,807 --> 01:43:39,673 And maybe my PhD someday, 1761 01:43:39,675 --> 01:43:44,043 and teach college along with Kasper and Wilhunt, 1762 01:43:44,046 --> 01:43:48,782 and the rest of the Ancient Mariners if I ever make it. 1763 01:43:50,819 --> 01:43:54,886 I might as well go through the motions. 1764 01:43:55,257 --> 01:43:58,624 There ain't nothing left to do. 1765 01:44:00,662 --> 01:44:03,361 Oh, Harry, I'm so sorry. 1766 01:44:03,364 --> 01:44:07,732 Yeah, I know. All those months 1767 01:44:10,103 --> 01:44:13,337 down the drain. Right? 1768 01:44:20,946 --> 01:44:23,746 I don't know what to say. 1769 01:44:23,914 --> 01:44:26,947 Just say, Goodbye, Mr. Chips. 1770 01:44:29,953 --> 01:44:36,890 Goodbye to the high school tennis team I'd volunteer to coach. 1771 01:44:38,960 --> 01:44:41,527 And the HI-Y dances 1772 01:44:43,230 --> 01:44:45,396 where Mr. Bailey 1773 01:44:47,534 --> 01:44:49,400 wins the day. 1774 01:44:53,105 --> 01:44:55,471 When all the boys 1775 01:44:57,208 --> 01:45:01,175 are allowed to wear their hair any way they want to. 1776 01:45:02,012 --> 01:45:06,481 Goodbye to the bright faces and bright minds 1777 01:45:06,484 --> 01:45:12,453 that could be anything if somebody would give them half a chance. 1778 01:45:16,193 --> 01:45:19,661 Goodbye, Garcia. 1779 01:45:20,329 --> 01:45:21,694 Oh... 1780 01:45:26,868 --> 01:45:28,400 Don't... 1781 01:45:28,402 --> 01:45:29,300 Jan, what's the matter? 1782 01:45:29,303 --> 01:45:31,569 It's what I came here to tell you. 1783 01:45:31,571 --> 01:45:32,069 Jan... 1784 01:45:32,070 --> 01:45:34,336 It's Bill. He's asked me to marry him. 1785 01:45:34,338 --> 01:45:34,969 Jan, don't... 1786 01:45:34,971 --> 01:45:38,472 And he wants an answer by tomorrow. 1787 01:45:39,775 --> 01:45:41,274 And... 1788 01:45:44,345 --> 01:45:45,911 And? 1789 01:45:49,583 --> 01:45:53,216 And I'm going to tell him yes. 1790 01:45:57,958 --> 01:46:02,659 I figured that I... I ought to tell you first. 1791 01:46:02,661 --> 01:46:06,995 I mean, I owe you that much. 1792 01:46:10,035 --> 01:46:11,733 Harry. 1793 01:46:12,736 --> 01:46:16,871 It wasn't going to work out between you and me. 1794 01:46:17,673 --> 01:46:22,842 I needed certain things just like you did. 1795 01:46:25,112 --> 01:46:30,181 I know that I was ruined and destroyed, 1796 01:46:32,019 --> 01:46:34,919 but that's the way I am now. 1797 01:46:38,089 --> 01:46:41,290 And I need a normal life. 1798 01:46:44,928 --> 01:46:47,227 Like you, Harry. 1799 01:46:49,399 --> 01:46:51,632 You went back to school 1800 01:46:51,634 --> 01:46:56,268 because you had to make something of your life. 1801 01:46:57,638 --> 01:47:00,171 Well, so do I. 1802 01:47:07,480 --> 01:47:09,012 Anyway, 1803 01:47:10,715 --> 01:47:12,648 I've decided, 1804 01:47:14,119 --> 01:47:16,652 and I want you to know. 1805 01:47:19,789 --> 01:47:23,756 I wish you'd yell at me or something, Harry. 1806 01:47:26,796 --> 01:47:29,029 Help me, Harry! 1807 01:47:31,033 --> 01:47:33,432 I can't help you. 1808 01:47:36,171 --> 01:47:39,204 I got nothing left to give. 1809 01:47:42,275 --> 01:47:44,808 They took everything. 1810 01:47:47,412 --> 01:47:49,278 Even you. 1811 01:47:51,916 --> 01:47:54,248 Let them have it. 1812 01:47:54,316 --> 01:47:58,283 Whatever they want. Do you understand? 1813 01:48:01,290 --> 01:48:05,091 'Cause they're not going to stop me. 1814 01:48:06,527 --> 01:48:12,096 I'm going to take the oral, and I'm going to pass it. 1815 01:48:13,132 --> 01:48:16,132 And I'm going to be a teacher, 1816 01:48:16,435 --> 01:48:19,101 and I'm going to teach 1817 01:48:21,440 --> 01:48:23,439 the truth 1818 01:48:27,279 --> 01:48:29,244 to somebody. 1819 01:48:34,151 --> 01:48:36,084 I love you. 1820 01:48:46,962 --> 01:48:48,694 Goodbye. 1821 01:49:38,848 --> 01:49:41,881 Harry, come on. 1822 01:49:41,884 --> 01:49:43,717 You know, I know I've been in a bad way. 1823 01:49:43,718 --> 01:49:46,350 And I don't remember what happened. 1824 01:49:46,354 --> 01:49:48,453 I mean, did I do something wrong? 1825 01:49:48,455 --> 01:49:51,222 Hey, you know, I went down the induction center, 1826 01:49:51,225 --> 01:49:53,591 and they wouldn't take me. 1827 01:49:53,594 --> 01:49:57,128 They stamped "constitutionally inferior" on my papers. 1828 01:49:57,130 --> 01:49:59,462 I mean, do you believe that? 1829 01:49:59,832 --> 01:50:00,296 It figures. 1830 01:50:00,298 --> 01:50:02,297 The Marines want guys who are crazy about killing. 1831 01:50:02,301 --> 01:50:06,403 They don't want guys who are just crazy. 1832 01:50:06,838 --> 01:50:10,138 Hey, man, are you mad at me? 1833 01:50:11,208 --> 01:50:14,808 I mean, look, you know, if I did something wrong... 1834 01:50:14,811 --> 01:50:15,542 Wow, I mean, I'm sorry. 1835 01:50:15,544 --> 01:50:19,712 I mean, I wouldn't do anything to hurt you. 1836 01:50:22,484 --> 01:50:23,181 Jesus Christ! 1837 01:50:23,184 --> 01:50:29,420 In this whole horrible mess, can't I even have the luxury of hating you? 1838 01:50:30,090 --> 01:50:32,323 Hold this, will you? 1839 01:50:38,464 --> 01:50:39,963 Nick. 1840 01:50:48,873 --> 01:50:50,972 Oh, here you are, Harry. 1841 01:50:50,974 --> 01:50:52,907 Come on, they're waiting for you. 1842 01:50:52,909 --> 01:50:55,308 The committee has assembled to create a bad impression. 1843 01:50:55,311 --> 01:50:58,478 ...from the dragon, who is represented by Error. 1844 01:50:58,480 --> 01:51:01,981 And it takes 12 cantos for the knight to prevail. 1845 01:51:01,984 --> 01:51:04,451 But perhaps more interesting 1846 01:51:04,453 --> 01:51:09,354 is the political allegory beneath the moral allegory. 1847 01:51:09,357 --> 01:51:13,358 Elizabeth I is the knight's Queen. 1848 01:51:13,361 --> 01:51:17,262 Lord Leicester is Prince Arthur, 1849 01:51:17,264 --> 01:51:22,734 and Mary Queen of Scots is represented by Duessa or Falsehood. 1850 01:51:22,736 --> 01:51:26,237 That's very good. 1851 01:51:27,539 --> 01:51:32,942 Who's your favorite contemporary American novelist? 1852 01:51:36,213 --> 01:51:38,813 Fitzgerald is, for one, with Gatsby. 1853 01:51:38,815 --> 01:51:41,548 William Faulkner, Sound and Fury. 1854 01:51:41,551 --> 01:51:44,084 Nathanael West's Miss Lonelyhearts. 1855 01:51:44,086 --> 01:51:46,085 Excuse me? 1856 01:51:46,088 --> 01:51:47,554 Can we go back? 1857 01:51:47,557 --> 01:51:51,291 There's fairly general agreement, at least among scholars, 1858 01:51:51,293 --> 01:51:55,428 that Tender Is the Night is Fitzgerald's major work, 1859 01:51:55,430 --> 01:51:59,697 but you... You mentioned Gatsby. 1860 01:52:00,300 --> 01:52:00,764 Why? 1861 01:52:00,768 --> 01:52:05,504 Well, I suppose because the character of Gatsby fascinates me so. 1862 01:52:05,505 --> 01:52:10,708 His great illusion that you can use wealth or power 1863 01:52:10,710 --> 01:52:15,712 to buy back the life you misspent trying to acquire them. 1864 01:52:15,849 --> 01:52:17,782 It's the American dream. 1865 01:52:17,784 --> 01:52:21,785 And the character of Nick Carraway is masterfully drawn. 1866 01:52:21,787 --> 01:52:23,786 From page one, it's fascinating 1867 01:52:23,789 --> 01:52:25,420 how Fitzgerald makes you believe 1868 01:52:25,423 --> 01:52:27,656 he's going to be telling you the truth. 1869 01:52:27,658 --> 01:52:29,124 Ahhh! 1870 01:52:29,127 --> 01:52:32,027 And does Carraway tell the truth? 1871 01:52:33,130 --> 01:52:35,330 Sure, so far as he knows it. 1872 01:52:36,032 --> 01:52:39,065 So far as he knows it. 1873 01:52:40,302 --> 01:52:41,567 And as quickly as he finds it out, 1874 01:52:41,569 --> 01:52:45,303 we get Gatsby's whole story, beautifully complete. 1875 01:52:45,305 --> 01:52:48,271 And Carraway's whole story. 1876 01:52:48,274 --> 01:52:50,673 Carraway's story? Mmm-hmm. 1877 01:52:52,245 --> 01:52:55,211 Carraway's story? It's not his book. 1878 01:52:56,681 --> 01:52:58,914 I'm afraid you miss the point, Mr. Bailey. 1879 01:52:58,916 --> 01:53:02,417 It is, in a most important way, Carraway's story. 1880 01:53:02,420 --> 01:53:05,254 Let me show you what I mean another way. 1881 01:53:05,256 --> 01:53:08,090 What woman serves as Carraway's 1882 01:53:08,091 --> 01:53:11,292 romantic interest in the book? 1883 01:53:12,662 --> 01:53:13,793 Jordan Baker. 1884 01:53:13,797 --> 01:53:14,962 Jordan Baker. 1885 01:53:14,963 --> 01:53:17,629 It's an odd name, isn't it? 1886 01:53:18,066 --> 01:53:20,732 Do you recall her physical traits? 1887 01:53:22,102 --> 01:53:23,668 Of course, yes. 1888 01:53:23,670 --> 01:53:28,072 She was lean and she was athletic. 1889 01:53:28,141 --> 01:53:29,205 Yes. 1890 01:53:29,207 --> 01:53:30,638 And she... 1891 01:53:32,775 --> 01:53:34,007 She played golf. 1892 01:53:34,010 --> 01:53:35,975 Yeah. She played golf. 1893 01:53:36,410 --> 01:53:38,409 A man's game. 1894 01:53:39,012 --> 01:53:42,146 She was lean, small-breasted. 1895 01:53:42,149 --> 01:53:47,184 In fact, she was altogether very boyish, wasn't she? 1896 01:53:48,787 --> 01:53:50,086 Carraway found her attractive. 1897 01:53:50,088 --> 01:53:54,022 Precisely, but not attractive enough 1898 01:53:54,025 --> 01:53:57,425 to overshadow the primary repressed lust, 1899 01:53:57,429 --> 01:54:00,830 that of Carraway for Gatsby! 1900 01:54:00,832 --> 01:54:04,066 You think Carraway was queer for Gatsby? 1901 01:54:06,670 --> 01:54:08,402 I'm sorry. 1902 01:54:09,973 --> 01:54:11,738 I'm sorry. 1903 01:54:12,842 --> 01:54:17,076 It's just that it's such a revelation. 1904 01:54:17,079 --> 01:54:20,012 Your naivete amazes me, Mr. Bailey. 1905 01:54:20,015 --> 01:54:23,648 Did you truly overlook the homosexuality 1906 01:54:23,651 --> 01:54:26,384 at the core of The Great Gatsby? 1907 01:54:29,557 --> 01:54:31,156 I did. 1908 01:54:31,657 --> 01:54:33,123 I... 1909 01:54:36,928 --> 01:54:39,695 I guess basically I did. 1910 01:54:41,765 --> 01:54:45,633 Because my mind was on other things. 1911 01:54:46,402 --> 01:54:48,668 But now that you've 1912 01:54:50,739 --> 01:54:52,605 pointed out, 1913 01:54:55,408 --> 01:54:57,473 I can see how 1914 01:54:58,143 --> 01:54:59,841 you can interpret it that... 1915 01:54:59,845 --> 01:55:00,810 Interpret it? 1916 01:55:00,812 --> 01:55:05,046 F. Scott Fitzgerald was driven by a terrible need 1917 01:55:05,049 --> 01:55:08,783 to express his own homosexual panic 1918 01:55:08,785 --> 01:55:12,686 through his characters, Mr. Bailey! 1919 01:55:28,669 --> 01:55:31,001 Homosexual panic? 1920 01:55:32,872 --> 01:55:33,704 Fitzgerald? 1921 01:55:33,707 --> 01:55:37,575 The man was a homosexual, Mr. Bailey. 1922 01:55:38,710 --> 01:55:39,875 I don't think he was. 1923 01:55:39,878 --> 01:55:43,112 Well, everybody knows that. 1924 01:55:48,319 --> 01:55:49,151 Well... 1925 01:55:49,152 --> 01:55:50,884 Isn't that right? 1926 01:56:02,498 --> 01:56:04,163 It's... 1927 01:56:08,504 --> 01:56:11,671 It's possible. It's... 1928 01:56:17,210 --> 01:56:22,845 It's possible, but... I don't... He wouldn't... 1929 01:56:32,123 --> 01:56:33,754 It's possible. I... 1930 01:56:35,358 --> 01:56:37,925 But I feel, if it's... 1931 01:56:40,329 --> 01:56:44,563 It's possible. I think it might... it would be... 1932 01:56:48,803 --> 01:56:51,637 It's possible, but it's... 1933 01:56:52,874 --> 01:56:56,976 It's going to be a surprise to Sheila Graham! 1934 01:56:56,978 --> 01:56:57,609 I beg your pardon? 1935 01:56:57,610 --> 01:57:01,111 I said, it's going to be a hell of a surprise to Sheila Graham! 1936 01:57:01,113 --> 01:57:02,412 Mr. Bailey. 1937 01:57:02,414 --> 01:57:04,647 Zelda is not going to believe that! 1938 01:57:04,649 --> 01:57:07,883 Mr. Bailey, what is the major verse form of English literature? 1939 01:57:07,885 --> 01:57:12,920 The limerick is the major verse form of the English language! 1940 01:57:12,924 --> 01:57:13,822 Calm yourself, Mr. Bailey. 1941 01:57:13,823 --> 01:57:18,724 No, no, no, the limerick is very pertinent to our discussion 1942 01:57:18,727 --> 01:57:20,993 of Fitzgerald's sexuality! 1943 01:57:20,995 --> 01:57:23,327 Haven't you heard? Haven't you heard? 1944 01:57:23,330 --> 01:57:23,928 Mr. Bailey! 1945 01:57:23,930 --> 01:57:26,029 One day gay F. Scott in his gloom 1946 01:57:26,033 --> 01:57:27,765 Took a lesbian up to his room 1947 01:57:27,767 --> 01:57:30,567 They argued all night As to who had the right 1948 01:57:30,570 --> 01:57:33,671 To do what and with which and to whom! 1949 01:57:33,672 --> 01:57:35,138 I think we've had enough of this! 1950 01:57:35,141 --> 01:57:36,039 No, no, no! 1951 01:57:36,041 --> 01:57:40,476 Dr. Hesselwhite, the writers of your century had their hang-ups, too. 1952 01:57:40,477 --> 01:57:42,809 Even Shakespeare. Stop it! Stop it, Mr. Bailey! 1953 01:57:42,812 --> 01:57:43,644 Do you know Shakespeare? 1954 01:57:43,647 --> 01:57:46,279 A young bawd in a brothel did waken 1955 01:57:46,281 --> 01:57:48,748 To find all her organs were aching 1956 01:57:48,751 --> 01:57:51,117 She thought it was Will's doing 1957 01:57:51,120 --> 01:57:53,920 But all that rough screwing 1958 01:57:53,921 --> 01:57:57,655 Was authored by Sir Francis Bacon! 1959 01:57:57,659 --> 01:57:58,323 Stop it! 1960 01:57:58,325 --> 01:58:00,290 Stop this farce! Stop it! 1961 01:58:00,293 --> 01:58:01,759 This farce! Stop it! Wait! 1962 01:58:01,762 --> 01:58:05,864 Gentlemen, scholars! From this inspired beginning, 1963 01:58:05,865 --> 01:58:10,067 the limerick evolved downward to its present level. 1964 01:58:10,069 --> 01:58:13,637 Until by the 18th century we had... 1965 01:58:13,639 --> 01:58:17,807 Blind Milton left God in the skies 1966 01:58:17,810 --> 01:58:20,442 To leap on his wife by surprise 1967 01:58:20,445 --> 01:58:25,581 He said, "Dear, I can't see So if you'll open your knee 1968 01:58:25,583 --> 01:58:28,417 "It will help to me find paradise!" 1969 01:58:28,418 --> 01:58:32,385 How dare you do that in here! 1970 01:58:33,188 --> 01:58:36,188 Filthy, rotten, trashy boy! 1971 01:58:37,326 --> 01:58:40,493 This board of examiners is adjourned! 1972 01:58:40,962 --> 01:58:43,729 Wait a minute, gentlemen! 1973 01:58:53,471 --> 01:58:56,271 This is my master's oral! 1974 01:58:56,273 --> 01:58:58,238 This is my master's! 1975 01:58:58,241 --> 01:59:00,774 I need some attention! 1976 01:59:02,878 --> 01:59:04,509 Let go of me! Leave me alone! 1977 01:59:04,512 --> 01:59:05,143 Come here. 1978 01:59:05,145 --> 01:59:08,613 You look like an anal invert 1979 01:59:08,616 --> 01:59:09,915 who practices autoeroticism. 1980 01:59:09,917 --> 01:59:12,484 Oh, God. Please don't! 1981 01:59:12,486 --> 01:59:14,551 You son of a... 1982 01:59:17,255 --> 01:59:22,057 Have you heard about the old man from Corfu? 1983 01:59:22,059 --> 01:59:25,325 Or the young man from Kent? 1984 01:59:47,883 --> 01:59:49,816 Why, Harry? 1985 01:59:50,751 --> 01:59:54,384 Why throw it all away like that? 1986 01:59:56,889 --> 01:59:59,022 I'm sorry, Kasper. 1987 02:00:00,026 --> 02:00:02,025 I truly am. 1988 02:00:05,197 --> 02:00:07,629 I couldn't help it. 1989 02:00:09,066 --> 02:00:11,799 What are you going to do now? 1990 02:00:14,337 --> 02:00:15,968 Kasper. 1991 02:00:16,538 --> 02:00:19,571 Don't you understand? 1992 02:00:22,143 --> 02:00:25,978 It's not what you do that counts. 1993 02:00:28,048 --> 02:00:32,183 It's what you are. 1994 02:01:21,265 --> 02:01:22,864 Whoopee. 1995 02:02:29,227 --> 02:02:32,560 Jan! Jan! 1996 02:02:32,863 --> 02:02:37,497 Jan, I got it back! I got it back! 1997 02:02:37,700 --> 02:02:42,702 I failed! I failed the master's! 1998 02:02:43,440 --> 02:02:45,405 How come? 1999 02:02:45,408 --> 02:02:47,507 I didn't like it. 2000 02:02:47,509 --> 02:02:50,208 I don't belong there. 2001 02:02:53,081 --> 02:02:56,114 What about Dr. Greengrass? 2002 02:02:57,917 --> 02:03:00,216 I told him no. 2003 02:03:02,655 --> 02:03:04,521 How come? 2004 02:03:05,689 --> 02:03:10,323 I don't like him. I don't belong there. 151140

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