Original subtitles

Talus. Metatarsal.

- Phalange. - Good.

The hand.

Scaphoid, trapezium.

- Revise later. - Difficult thoughts help me concentrate.

Oh, actually,

- I need to tell you something personal. - Uh-huh.

I've met someone.

OK. Does he have prospects?

Her mum's a dentist.

I see.

What do you think?

Er... Is she good?

Huh! I beg your pardon?

The mother. Always hard to find a good dentist.

Dad, you're annoying.

Are you happy?

- Very. - Then so am I.

- What's her name? - Kate.

Do you think Mum'll be OK with it?

- Yeah, of course she'll be OK... - Shit!

- Are you OK? - Yeah.

Take a breath. Take a breath. I've got you. I've got you.

Go for it again.

Here we go.

Well done, well done.

Can we not tell Mum?

What about? The fall or the girlfriend?

Both.

She's stressed at the moment.

Yeah, OK, we've all got problems.

Yeah, we've all got problems. That's right, mate.

We do, but all I'm asking you is that when you get home tonight...

.. just take it easy with Mum, yeah?

- Why? - She's having trouble at work.

- What sort of trouble? - She's trying to pass this exam

and one of the supervisors isn't...

Look, I don't know exactly what it is, mate,

but you know what I'm saying. Be kind. Be nice.

- Yeah, OK. - And smile. I know you can.

Do my best.

Just smile.

- Yeah. - OK. Thanks, mate.

All right, Dad. See you.

I'll see you later. Bye.

Well, let's get going.

- You all right, Tony? Feeling better? - Yes, mate.

Good, good.

- Hot today. - Mexico sent it up the Gulf Stream apparently.

How's the family?

What's the bad news?

What? Nothing.

I'm not gonna like this, am I?

- How are the kids, though? - The kids are beautiful.

Now why don't you tell me what I don't want to know.

They're going to cut your level of management: give half to me, half to team leaders.

- They don't think they can justify... - So promote me.

You can tell from my tone that's not what this is.

- I've got three kids, mate. - That's why I asked how they were.

So if one of them had leukaemia, would that make any difference?

You'll be told officially in the next few days

- but I wanted to give you... - Yeah, yeah.

Month's notice, but I thought you might want to start looking.

Sorry.

It's not your fault.

- Drink? - What?

I could really do with a drink.

Whoooo!

- Happy birthday, Dad. - Happy birthday, darling.

Oh, thank you.

- Oh, plates. Two secs! - Yes!

I'll help.

Do you remember my 30th?

Ah, we don't need to talk about that!

- What happened? - He er... he came over with Lisa.

No!

Right, er... Sorry. Something happened at work.

It's not good. I...

- What's the matter? - Alex isn't home.

I've tried his mobile. Jack. Everyone.

No-one knows where he is.

- Are you on call? - Er, no.

Hello?

Right, well, I, er...

Yeah. No. Of course. Of course. I'm on my way.

- Thanks for coming in. - No problem.

- You missed us. - Couldn't stay away.

It's not your night, but Mr Franks is stuck in another code red.

- Honestly, it's fine. - Been rushed off our feet tonight.

I lost track earlier. Introduced myself twice to the same person!

- Nora's drank too much coffee. - I'm fine. A few cups.

- Seven. - Wow!

One was a decaf.

- Gentlemen. Good evening. - Evening.

- Sam, how are the shoes? - The shoes are not for work.

Guess how much he spent on a pair of shoes.

- My brother's wedding. - A thousand.

What? Where do you get that kind of money?

Don't eat, don't do drugs, no kids.

- I save. - Everyone good?

- Ready. - All ready.

This is Alex Bowker.

Stabbed left upper abdomen: small puncture site, minimal bleeding.

- Confused but conscious. - Thank you.

Don't worry, Alex, we're going to look after you.

- Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. - Oi.

- Sorry. My... my... my son. - Sir, can you wait a moment, please?

- I'm not going to queue. - Can I help?

Yeah, my son. Erm... I rang his mobile.

The police answered and said he was in hospital here.

- They told me to go home and wait... - What's your son's name?

- Alex. Alex Bowker. - OK.

Alex?

Oh, Jesus.

Hey. Hello, mate.

Hello. You're gonna be all right. You're gonna be fine. I promise.

- Mr Bowker? - Yeah. Who... who...

- Who...? - Mr Allerton, senior trauma surgeon here.

- Is he all right? They said a stabbing. - Yes, he's been stabbed on the left side.

Just under the ribs. But the ultrasound didn't show any sign of internal bleeding.

- So that's reassuring. - Is he...

We're going to take him for a full scan just to be sure. But, Mr Bowker? Mr Bowker?

The trauma centre is the most well-resourced part of the hospital.

Given what's happened, he couldn't be in a better place.

- Should I be... - He's disorientated as you would expect.

But medically, he's doing very well. If you'll just give me five minutes,

- I will come back and update you. - Can I go with him?

We'll look after him. Trust us.

Please.

- Jon? - Mm-hm? Yeah?

Sorry, I need you to sign that again.

I know. I know.

What's happened? Did you speak to the doctor?

- Sorry, I was at the pub. - What? You...

- It doesn't matter. Dan, the doctor. - Is your mum all right?

Worried. Is he... is he all right? Where is he?

He's... I've seen him. He's OK, he's OK.

His eyes were open. Er, then, yeah, the doctor said he'd been stabbed.

- Oh, my God. - In his side, I think.

But, er... Why...? Who would...

He's not like that. He... he doesn't mix with people who'd...

The doctor said he'd be here in five minutes. It's been ten.

Yes, yes?

Mr Bowker. I'm DS Carl Harris, this is DC Lancing. Can we have a word, please?

- Mr Bowker... - Look, Dan. My name's Dan.

Thank you. Do you mind if we ask you a few questions?

- The doctor's supposed to be coming any... - Of course. If the doctor comes we'll leave.

Can you think of any reason anyone might want to do this to Alex?

- No. - He's popular. He's got friends.

- Was Alex taking or dealing drugs at all? - No.

Has he been involved in any groups of gangs that you know of?

No. He's not like that.

Obviously, he was out quite late. Were you aware of where he was?

No. Erm... We were... we were worried.

We couldn't get through on his phone. Er...

- His mates, his friends were at home. - Where is he?

- Sorry? - He said he'd be five minutes.

- It's been almost 15. - I'm sure if he said he'd update you...

He's probably told you more than he's told us, been more honest with you.

- I can see if there's any... - He's on his own.

- What? - Alex. He's going through all this on his own.

- We should be with him. - Mr Bowker, if you'll...

Suction, please, Nurse.

- Charging. - Charged.

Clear.

- He's still in VF. - OK.

I need more blood.

Alex. Is that Alex?

Could someone please help this boy's dad?

You need to tell me what's happening!

What's going on? Is he going to be all right?

- Is he going to be all right? - Yes, if we can focus. More blood.

We have to put him first. Mr Bowker,

the best you could do right now would be to step away and let us do this.

He's still in VF, Jon.

- Jon? - Shock him again.

Paddles, please.

- Charging. - Charged.

Clear.

Come on, come on!

He's in asystole now.

Jon.

Jon.

Erm...

12:54, please.

- You want me to... - No, no, no.

It's all right, erm... I'll do it.

Erm... Can we, er... go into a side room?

You can tell us here. That was him.

Er, yes.

Can I see him?

I'm afraid we did everything we could, but Alex died.

Oh, God.

- I'm sorry. - I want to go and see him!

- I'm very sorry. Can... - Let me see him.

Please... Side room.

Dan! Dan...

Erm, Mr Bowker...

Would you step this way?

You said he was going to be all right.

Erm... It seems the knife entered the body and went upwards,

er... making a small hole in the heart.

Erm... At first the bleeding was contained, didn't even show up on the ultrasound.

Erm... But then it got much worse very quickly.

When we opened the body, opened the chest...

.. it was impossible to control the size of the hole.

I don't know what any of that means.

We did everything that we could.

You went for a scan, you said it was... reassuring.

- Mr Bowker... - Are you telling us the truth?

- Dan... - No, no.

Because... you don't look to me...

like someone... who is telling the truth.

Staring at me, what you're doing with your hands.

Did you make a mistake?

When a knife goes into the body like that,

there are all sorts of possibilities for damage.

The arteries, the heart, the lungs.

We try to be comprehensive.

We would like to know what we need to repair.

But there's always a chance, as with Alex,

that there's something we can't see.

- So you missed it? - There was no way of knowing.

What's your name?

Mr Allerton.

Your first name.

Jon.

Jon, can you honestly say...

.. that you did everything you could...

.. to save our son?

Yes.

Is... is he OK?

Oh, God!

Come on, come on.

Are you all right?

Erm...

A 15-year-old boy died.

- I'm sure you did everything you could. - Yeah. Yeah.

Oh, hi, Dad. This is Kate.

Hi, Kate. Pleasure to meet you.

Hi, Jon! You too.

- You should be in bed. - Er... Are you making tea?

- Yeah! - Then I'll give you a hand.

- I couldn't sleep. - That's not like you.

That's his room there.

I promise we'll be very careful with everything.

- Hi. - Oh, hi, er... Mr er...

Daniel Bowker.

- My son was Alex. - Yes.

Yes, of course. How are you?

I wondered, could we talk?

Er... Have you called ahead?

Well, no, you said that if I needed to speak more...

It would have been better if you'd made an appointment.

You can understand how busy we are.

Well, I haven't got much time off, so... if you have a moment now?

Give me five minutes. I'll be right back.

- That's what you said on the night. - I'm sorry?

"Five minutes".

I told my wife. I said, "He'll be back, he'll tell us what's going on."

You never did.

If you'd like to wait here.

- He's been through a lot. - So's everyone.

Everyone wants to sit in a room and go through it second by second,

but we can't drop everything just because...

What is it? Is there something about him?

No. What?

- You didn't do anything wrong. - Hah. I know.

Do you have any specific questions about what happened here?

- Just one. - Sure.

Did you make a mistake?

- I don't believe so. - Because you... you seemed so calm.

When I first saw you.

- You reassured me. - At that point Alex was stable.

It's important that we remain calm.

The methodology is precise in trauma. We can't afford for there to be too much emotion.

But when you were working on him, just before he died, you didn't seem calm.

- You looked... - I was working.

.. guilty.

- I was trying everything I could. - You were panicking.

I saw you look down, then look up.

In your eyes. I could tell.

And then, later, when you explained to us that he was... dead...

.. and what had happened,

you were talking very quickly, much quicker than you're talking now.

You seemed like you were... covering something.

- Well, I promise... - Do you actively seek out dangerous situations?

- Is that why you're doing this job? - Absolutely not.

And in your life? Your spare time.

You like... to do dangerous things?

I don't think so.

Climbing. It's on your page. It's on the website.

- Mr Bowker... - Dan. My name's Dan.

Dan. I promise, there wasn't a mistake.

It was just part of the... injuries caused by the stabbing.

The bleeding was too severe.

- It wasn't when he came in. - It was. We just couldn't see it.

So if, if you'd have noticed that hole earlier,

you could have helped him?

If we'd known about it we would have dealt with it immediately, yes.

- So it was a mistake? - No, no.

Just an example that... you can't see everything going on in a body.

So why were you panicking like that?

I could see it in your face.

I think you misread the room.

- I'm upset... - I'm sure.

Mad. Not in my right mind.

- That's not what I'm saying. - Do you have children?

- Yes. - One.

I... One, yes. How did you know?

Just a guess. You're busy. Busy people often just have one child.

Huh.

Dan... Why don't you say whatever it is you want to say?

I wake up thinking about him.

That room. What I saw.

The moment that Alex died.

When I wasn't there.

Do you wake up thinking about it?

Alex. That moment.

If you couldn't deal with death in this job, you wouldn't be working here.

- So you don't think about it? - I... I think about it.

But you don't lose sleep?

No.

How long have you been doing this job?

Erm... I've been a surgeon 20 years nearly.

- And you're how old? - 46.

You look older.

Oh! No, sorry.

Actually, I'm, er... 47 now.

- Recent birthday? - Last week.

- You had a party? - A family thing.

Cake? Few drinks?

Er, yeah. A nice dinner with the family and a few friends.

It's his funeral.

Next week.

Thursday. If you want to come?

Oh, erm... thank you, but er...

we don't normally attend funerals. It's because...

Well, on the website there's testimonies from former patients' families.

- OK, yes... - They talk about the continued support.

The relationship you develop over time.

Occasionally. If the patient has been under our care for a long time,

then, well, yes,

- the family do become... - But you don't know us well enough?

No.

I feel like you're an important part of his life.

You were there at the end. I wasn't there.

- My wife wasn't there. - Dan, would you like to see someone?

- I'm sorry? - There are a number of charities that, er...

can provide support for relatives at a time like this.

If you want to come to the funeral, you're welcome.

Thank you.

Mate...

How are you doing?

Yeah, you know. Good to be back at work.

- Yeah, I thought you'd be off longer. - Well, good to be busy.

Yeah. Yeah, of course.

But for how long?

What?

I missed the meeting. The big staff meeting they had about it.

But from what I understand, nothing was said, no complaints were made.

No union action, just a load of us were dumped.

And what happened to Alex is not going to make any difference, is it? The decision still stands.

- They're not actually firing you. - Redundancy.

You'll get a good reference.

I've got two other kids and a wife that works in Asda.

And a funeral to pay for now.

I certainly wasn't insured for that,

and I'll be fucked if he's going out in a cardboard coffin.

- The lads have had a whip-round. - I know.

Wanted to help out.

- Wasn't much. - What?

I'm not being funny but it was 30 quid.

Number of lads, they've known me for ages. Years, most of them.

So I'd say 30 quid is a bit disappointing.

What do you think?

It's tough for everyone at the moment.

How long have I got before I'm let go?

End of the month. But, with what's happened,

if you just want to go now, they'll pay you anyway.

Do you ever think: If I was born in a different place...

.. if my mum and dad had more money...

.. I'd be a completely different person?

If my dad had money, he would have sent me to a better school.

I would have done A levels, maybe even university.

Things would have been better, made things better for myself.

I would have put my son through private school, and now maybe he wouldn't be dead.

Because that what's going through my mind pretty much all the time right now.

That really he... he died because of me, because I'm a failure.

- No, Dan. - I just wasn't born to the right people.

And neither was my son.

Pfft!

I'll leave now then.

- Afternoon. - Afternoon.

What do people make of you two at school?

- What? - Well, you know... going out with a girl.

Well, it's normal. So...

Yeah. Good. OK.

Yeah, more importantly, can we get back to preparation, please?

The interview is three weeks away.

And this is my future we're talking about.

- Dad? - Oh.

Sorry!

- I'm proud of you, you know that? - Yeah?

So, tell me... Alana,

why do you wish to become a doctor?

To shut my dad up.

Sounds like a very good reason to me.

Nah, it's important to me that my chosen profession

helps people in a tangible way.

I feel also that I am organised,

precise, quick to learn,

but with good people skills.

I come from a medical family background. This...

Dad?

Dad, are you OK?

Er, yeah. Yeah. I just, er...

Yeah, I, er... just thought I saw someone...

.. someone I knew.

You work too hard.

Are you all right?

- Yeah. Yeah. - I can't do this.

- Who's that? - The surgeon.

What is he doing here?

I didn't think you'd come.

Well, maybe I owe it to Alex. Like you said, it's important.

Do you want to say a few words?

Wh... er...

I... I don't think that I...

It was a joke.

Right.

Good suit.

Thank you.

Best suit here.

Dan, we're going in.

[This way, please.]

The difficult thing about this is...

.. that Alex always talked about the future...

.. ever since he was a little boy.

When he learnt to ride a bike...

.. suddenly he wanted to become a motorbike racer.

He went to the sea, he'd become a marine biologist.

The most recent thing was that he was...

.. he was going to be a music journalist.

Yeah.

Well...

Alex isn't going to become anything.

And... I don't believe in God.

The afterlife.

I think he's just...

.. stopped.

And he didn't have to.

And at the moment...

I'm... I'm just looking for someone to blame.

I'm sure that's the wrong reaction.

But I'm angry and I'm looking for that person to blame

because that's how I think Alex would feel.

A-A... A real...

.. injustice...

.. that he wasn't able to do all the things that he wanted to do.

He could have been anything that he'd set his mind to.

He could have been anything.

So what today is really about is...

.. waste.

I think it didn't have to happen.

I think he'd still be with us now if...

.. if the world hadn't failed him.

If we... if we...

if we'd somehow just...

I don't know...

.. looked after him better.

Hi. Hi, Dan. Mrs Bowker.

Erm... It was a... a beautiful service.

Alex was clearly a wonderful young man.

I have to go, but I just wanted to say, once again, how sorry I am.

For what?

Well, for your loss. That Alex died.

Did you know what I meant when I said we all have to share responsibility?

Dan...

I'm not sure I entirely agree.

I think responsibility lies firmly in the hands of whoever attacked him.

- Do they know yet who it was? - They're still trying to find out.

- Well, I do hope... - Can you listen to me?

You have a responsibility too.

- Dan. - Because he was in your care.

Can I reassure you once again, Mr Bowker, that I did my absolute best.

Your wife is a psychiatrist.

- I'm sorry? - I looked you up.

I have to go. Bye.

You told me... you told me you'd been drinking the night you treated him.

- What? - It was your birthday the night he died.

And you told me that you'd had a few drinks.

Now if you'd been drinking, you shouldn't have been at work.

- I'm not sure I said that I... - You said "I had a few drinks for my birthday."

- I don't think I said that. - Did you have a drink that evening?

Because you told me that... when it was just the two of us together,

you told me that you did.

Now did you have a drink that night?

No.

Now I know that you're lying about all of it.

Now that you've changed your story,

I now know... that you made a mistake.

And you know...

in here... what you did.

That you let him down.

Admit it.

Admit it!

Hey.

Dan.

- Dan... - Aargh!

Dan! What are you doing?

- Dan? - Please.

What is going on?

How was it?

Er... difficult.

I said you shouldn't go.

- You're an idiot. - Hm. Yeah.

Come on.

Did you know him?

- My son. - Oh. Oh, I'm so sorry.

- This is where he died? - No, it isn't.

Today is a great day!

The birds are singing, the sun's shining.

Oh, my beautiful daughter. Mwah!

And my... reasonably attractive wife.

Your reasonably attractive wife will give you a smack!

Ooh-ah!

Both in their own ways on the brink of greatness.

- I am a happy man. - There's no coffee.

- What? - I finished it last night.

Up till half-three... apparently.

- Revision? - Yeah. Revision.

Mm-hm.

No coffee, no problem. I can get a coffee at work.

- Why are you talking funny? - Because he's in a good mood.

You are gorgeous!

Ah! No, thank you!

Did you sleep all right last night? It felt like you were awake.

- Really? - Mm.

No, I slept fine.

You both... have a great day.

- Morning. - Morning.

Hello.

Hi. I'm Dan.

My son died a few weeks ago. You probably don't even...

You're... you're working here?

First day.

Well, er... I'd better get on.

Yeah.