Original subtitles

[pan flute playing]

[knocking on door]

[knocking on door]

[knocking on door] Yes!

Professor, I think I'm onto something.

Ah.

[energetic music]

[eerie music]

[phone ringing]

I said "hi" Sidney.

Oh hey Luke.

You okay?

Yeah. Yeah I'm fine,

[phone ringing] So how's the piece coming?

Good. The article is going really well.

Just a few more details.

Yeah but Sidney I don't have any copy of it.

You'll have it first thing in the morning.

Alright.

[church bell rings]

- Coffee, professor? - Please.

Thank you.

Jesus, it's hot.

Sorry.

Not a problem.

Alexander Hamilton once asked Thomas Jefferson

"Why do we have to have a House of Representatives and a Senate"

Thomas Jefferson said: Because, just as I pour

my coffee into the saucer,

to keep from harming my lips,

so I protect the delicate membranes of our constitution

by pouring our new laws from the House of Representatives

into the Senate.

I know I've been excited before

Ah! [laughs] Excited.

- Okay, over-excited. - Mm-hmm.

But this time I think I found something.

[eerie music]

Who schedules an interview for the middle of the night, anyway?

It's not the middle of the night, Sam.

It's 8.30.

It's for Artemis, remember?

The dating service?

Artemis?

Did you read any of the emails I sent you?

Not on purpose.

Like I said, you want me to open an email,

I gotta at least have the prospect of seeing boobs.

Minimum.

Sam, nice.

Always the gentleman.

I guess I'll continue not to read them then.

And your unyielding sense of professionalism

never ceases to amaze me.

Hum, excuse me.

Where are your "Photographer of the Year" awards,

the last three years running?

Charm and humility? Sam!

You're the total package.

That you are still single is truly a mystery.

I'm still single because I wanna be, thank you.

Whatever, Romeo.

Let's go.

Ow! What do you mean?

First it's all "wait, wait, wait", and now you've got a bug up your ass?

Well make up your mind!

Let's just get this over with, please.

[eerie electronic sounds]

Are you deaf?

Just hold on, I want to show you something.

Come here.

What?

Just come here.

This better be good.

Riveting.

Can we go now?

[suspenseful music]

What the hell is this?

It's the Vampire Web.

The what?

The Vampire... Just watch, it gets better.

Oh my god.

That is so fake.

Please tell me you don't actually believe this shit.

Maybe I do.

Disgusting.

The site from where these images originate

is owned by the same entity that owns Artemis.

Artemis and the Vampire Web originate through the same server.

If we don't go right now Sam, I swear to God.

Just a sec.

How can you not totally dig this I mean, look at them.

Look at them, they're like ravenous

vampire sluts, what's not to like?

You're pathetic.

Yeah, I'm pathetic. I'm pathetic, right.

I pray for the woman you end up with, you know that?

Oh really?

Really!

And why is that?

Because you are a degenerate pervert. That's why.

[keys dropping]

Ow.

Right.

Nice one.

We've magnified the images.

And it's almost certain that the blood originates

from beneath the victim's skin.

And as for the women, they are, all of them,

- literally drinking the blood. - Hmm.

It's not a trick. These are vampires.

Then they're doing a bloody good job of faking it.

No pun intended.

[Sydney] I understand the fetish.

I have no problem with that.

What gets you off, gets you off.

It's the intellectual aspect of it that bothers me.

The what, now?

What we writers like to call verisimilitude,

or in this case the lack of it.

Veri... What? What the hell are you talking about?

Intuitive mythology.

Even I know you can't see vampires on film.

So how is it you can see them on the web?

It's ridiculous.

Because it's not film, Genius. It's digital.

Whatever.

I guess this is it.

[receptionist] Good evening, How may I help you?

Hi, I'm Sydney St. James, this is Sam Francis.

Hey, how are you doing?

We're from the magazine.

Of course.

I'm afraid Anna's running a bit late.

Have a seat and I'll call you the minute she's ready.

[phone ringing]

Yes.

[Van Helsing] You have to explain this to me again.

How do these elements relate?

What is Artemis?

It's a dating service, Professor.

A very special one.

What does it do?

A dating service.

I'm not following you.

Oh I'm sorry. Yeah, I'm just going to...

You are such a knob!

[inaudible]

What did you call me?

God are you ever boring, man!

You know it's like you've got some kind of,

I don't know man, you're screwed up.

Like a fucking nun or something.

That's nice. You kiss your mother with that mouth?

Yeah, and whatever this condition is,

it prevents you from having fun.

I know how to have fun, thank you.

Right, yeah. When's the last time you got laid?

I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that.

You know what? I bet you don't even remember.

You know what, Come on, tell me.

Sam just shut up.

Seriously be honest with me. When's the last time you got laid.

No really shut your mouth.

Wait a minute! I remember!

Sam I swear to God...

What was that dudes name? He had the little thing here?

That little mark... Pablo!

His name was not Pablo.

His name was Pablo Cannelloni or Marco Rigotone or something like that, right?

Right?

It was what? Three, four years ago?

That's a long time.

Are you finished?

- Done. - Great.

These days many people are using the internet to meet people.

I mean I'm more of a traditionalist,

a romantic, so I only ever hook up when...

Hook up?

Yeah, you know. Meet people, go out with dates,

Well... You know.

Yes I'm fully aware what dating is all about,

I'm not that old.

My question is, what does this have to do with the price of coffee in Brazil?

Perhaps I should get to the point?

Perhaps you should.

Look, I'm just telling you, I'm here for you.

Sam's got a whole lot of love to give.

How about... Um, never.

Never, never, never, never.

Artemis. The site designed by,

run by and catering to the needs of women.

I can't believe I'm asking you this, but tell me about this stupid vampire thing again.

Oh, it's not stupid.

You know there are people who believe it's real.

- Really? - Yeah, societies of vampire people.

And they're not just into it for the sex either.

Like, It's a lifestyle. They actually live like that.

A lifestyle?

- Yeah, absolutely. - Wait, wait, please.

These people don't have a life, let alone a lifestyle.

[footsteps]

[energetic music]

It's the guy who didn't touch a breast till second year of college.

The girl who works in the library and daydreams

of being ravaged by the guy who sweeps the floor.

I mean, it's pathetic.

These people don't even realize how pathetic their lives... Really are...

What?

What?

Are you still talking to me?

Oh forget it.

Anna's ready. You may come in now.

About time.

- Did you see that? - See what?

This, um...

Need help there Einstein?

I hate you.

[in German] But are you done?

Yes, that's right.

[ominous music]

Hello, I'm Anna.

Hi, Sam.

Sydney.

[ominous sounds]

Pleasure to meet you, Sydney.

After you.

This is a great space you've got here.

[Sam] Very cool.

Actually I think I've shot here before.

[Anna] Really? How interesting.

Are there still studios in here?

Other than my own, no.

We actually purchased the building last year.

Oh, jeez, I guess business is good then.

Yes it is quite good.

Syd...

Sydney.

Right.

Um, do you mind?

Not at all.

Now tell me, how did you come into contact with this group?

Well, it was originally a posting in a news group,

But then one of the organization's filters caught it

And that mythology professor in Boston, what's his name?

Quisling, he's an idiot.

Okay, anyway. He followed it up.

He says that it met at least seven criteria on your protocol.

Well from what you've shown me I would say at least seven.

But I might remind you that in Budapest there were nine.

[Sydney] So what led you to believe the world needed

another internet dating service?

Let's just say that I saw a need.

We find the traditional paradigm is rather male oriented.

Our goal is to level the playing field.

I see.

Membership is divided into dating, relationship and intimate encounters.

Each category has its own features and each caters

to the specific desires of our members.

I'll use dating as an example.

Okay.

Beyond the information given when a man becomes a member

female registrants are encouraged to post feedback.

Feedback about what?

Let's say that you and Sam go out on a date.

You would be asked to fill out a questionnaire.

Such as, "Did Sam pay?".

Yeah, in her dreams.

"How were his manners?".

"Did he drink, if so, how much?".

That sort of thing.

[Sydney] What about sex?

Do your members relate whether the man was good in bed,

that sort of thing?

Of course.

Do men get to do the same?

Post information on the women they meet?

No.

We believe that--

[phone ringing]

Yes?

Would you excuse me for a moment?

Of course.

So what do you think?

About what?

Anna.

You don't find her a little odd?

I think she's hot.

[footsteps]

Now, you were asking?

About why men don't enjoy the same privilege as women.

Isn't that sexist?

Maybe it is.

But none of the men have complained.

How about you Sam?

Sam?

What?

Would that bother you?

Women comparing notes about you?

Hell no!

No, not at all.

Yes, well he's not normal.

Our research has indicated that most men,

rather than minding it, actually relish it.

Hmm. Egomaniacs.

What is the function of ego?

We at Artemis like to utilize natural gender inclinations.

It makes the entire process easier for all involved.

[Sydney] Thank you for your time.

I'll let you know when the piece is finished.

It was a pleasure meeting you, Sydney.

[ominous sounds]

Sydney!

Please take one.

Thanks.

[ominous sounds]

[Van Helsing] It's actually brilliant.

[Tone] What is?

Brilliant!

That they could call prime samples from the population,

to maximize the effectiveness of their feeding.

It's brilliant!

But we have found them?

Yes, I think we have.

It's time.

It's their time. It must be.

Yes.

[phone ringing]

[Sydney] Hello... Hi.

No, no, no. It's fine, it's fine.

You're just a little bit early, that's all.

Yeah no, come on up.

Number 412. Yeah.

Who was that?

Uh... Madame Blavatzky.

The psychic?

Hmm-mm.

Are you doing a reading?

Yeah, why not?

Well, because you don't believe in that stuff.

I know.

So then why are you doing it?

Hey, what's up? You Alright?

Yeah I am. I'm fine.

I've just been in a little bit of a rut lately.

Yeah.

I'm thinking about quitting.

Quitting what?

Work.

What?

But you love what you do.

Yeah well after eight years of bullshit

like this Artemis article...

I don't know any more.

[emotional music]

[psychic] Let's deal them again.

Okay.

[ominous music]

What?

I um...

I'm sorry!

What?

Should I be worried?

What is it?

[Anna] We all know the date, and I have appreciated your patience.

It's taken longer than anticipated,

however, I am pleased to tell you that we have indeed found a suitable candidate.

[ominous sound]

What do you mean, nothing?

You didn't get to me?

We didn't get to me!

I don't understand.

She got all freaked out and then she just left.

Freaked out about what?

Look all I know is we did it four or five times.

She kept asking me to reshuffle the cards,

Then kept picking them up.

Gave me the whole "It's not you it's me" routine",

and then she gave me my money back.

And then she read my palm,

and she turned as white as a sheet...

And then?

And then she took off like a bat out of hell.

I have never heard of that before.

Ever.

Great.

Maybe you're cursed.

Not that it will affect our friendship or anything.

No, she didn't mention anything about a curse.

Although she did mention something about the danges

of having a raving slut for a best friend!

The whole tarred with one brush thing.

[suspenseful music]

[Tone] Is that a name, Professor?

Something I can look up, or...?

Hmm, its ah, Its called the ElioRa.

[ominous sound]

Ra as in the sun god?

Don't waste your time with that thing.

You'd be surprised what I can find out there.

Can you at least tell me what it's primary function is?

It's a vampire monitor.

It's intended to measure the strength of the sect's power.

[emotional music]

It was sent to us in the seventies from Cairo,

via the Vatican.

But I've never been able to get it to work.

What the hell.

Okay, your nickname.

Writer Babe.

[phone ringing]

Yes.

[ominous music]

I've got it.

Okay, I am a woman,

looking for a man.

Profile type "dating".

[dramatic music]

[in German] Come to me.

[Van Helsing] At the turn of each millennium

the vampires must regenerate themselves.

Excession quieso.

Literally deep sleep.

[Tone] Hibernation?

More or less.

It lasts for something in the order of 25 years.

Their powers are at their greatest in the weeks

and months preceding this regeneration.

To what end? I mean if you're already at your strongest,

why would you need to regenerate?

Because though their powers are at their peak,

They themselves are at their most vulnerable.

Why?

Well, for one to sleep, all must sleep.

And living forever requires resources.

If this is supposed to insure their future,

then they would need some person to look after it, won't they?

[trumpet playing]

[Van Helsing] This person is a repository for their living energy.

It has to be a woman.

She's the vampire version of the Christian Mary.

A vessel who will carry their collective seed

while the sect sleeps.

As this cycle nears its end,

they have precious little time to find this individual,

and they cannot take her by force as they do their victims.

They must convince her to become their protector.

She must do this willingly, of her own volition.

When, and if, this woman agrees,

The sect will literally disappear.

They remain invulnerable for the entire duration of their sleep.

So how do we stop them?

If these Artemis people really are a sect

then we must find the matriarch and kill her,

before they enter their deep sleep.

[Tone] Who's the matriarch?

The leader, of course.

Problem is, I have no idea who she is.

But Professor I have heard you speaking so many times on this subject,

I mean, how can you not know?

Well, I knew who she was but a long time has passed,

things could have changed.

The last time my grandfather encountered the sect

was in Madrid in 1906.

Which incidentally was the year of my father's birth.

The last time he had confirmation of their whereabouts...

Was... let's see...

Yes, here it is.

The sect was last known in what was then Koenigsberg,

which is now Kaliningrad in 1915.

Russia?

Yes, he thought they were heading to Petersburg.

He had a theory about Rasputin, about why the sect should want to go to Russia.

But of course not having seen them since Koenigsberg that could never be confirmed.

So now Professor, will you... will we go after them?

Yes.

No.

Perhaps it's too late for me.

In any case, we'll need someone else.

Someone more lethal.

[suspenseful music]

Someone less likely to be distracted.

[ominous sounds]

So how did you know that I...

When someone begins to register as you did.

We automatically follow up.

You can do that?

We do.

I guess I was just surprised when you called.

I don't usually follow up myself.

I just got the feeling that Artemis might be something

that could really benefit you.

How?

Are you seeing anyone?

No, that's not it.

It's just a dating service isn't really my thing.

I find it a little desperate, really.

I understand why some might feel that way.

But they don't understand that tools like these simply allow

us to get to know one another at a safe distance.

Well I guess I'm one of those rare people

who prefers face to face communication.

To be honest, so do I.

[ominous music]

Sydney...

you do realize that...

No, God no!

No that's not it.

I wasn't implying.

It's just that you never know, do you?

[ominous sounds]

[Van Helsing humming]

[ominous sounds]

[Van Helsing] Interesting.

Tone?

Tone!

[Tone] Professor?

I believe it's underway...

I believe they found her.

[suspenseful music]

Hey, Sam Fran!

Sorry Luke.

What is this you're watching?

It's this cult thing.

It's like Pirate Radio in the old days.

It's wicked.

It's vampires. It's called the Vampire Web.

Am I paying for this?

No, no, no. It's free.

Literally no one has a clue here it's from or who's behind it.

It's been on for like, I don't know, six months or so.

First it was on once a week, now it's daily.

Now it's on three or four times a day.

Maybe they're getting hungrier.

Yeah, maybe.

Um, anyway. Look, have you seen Sydney?

I haven't seen her.

[monitor sounds]

[monitor sounds]

[shutter sounds]

Hey Sam.

Boss is looking for you.

Artemis!

I joined last night.

I swear to God, I've got my screening tomorrow.

You're what?

My screening.

You have to have a physical, blood test, the works.

I mean they verify all your banking info,

make sure you work where you say you do ,all that.

Are you insane?

What? I've got nothing to hide.

Well, except your tail.

I keep telling you it's not a tail

and it's not a third leg either.

You wish.

Seriously, doesn't that bother you in the least?

How much information these people want on you?

No, makes sense.

Well, to me anyway.

I mean look, the good thing is when you meet somebody

you know right away that they're telling the truth.

You'd think a woman would appreciate that.

I guess.

Anyway, I'm out of here.

Don't forget Luke's looking for you.

Thanks.

Hey, Sam!

Yo?

Do you have the...

Check your inbox.

Do you not read any of my emails?

Not unless I'm gonna see boobs.

The file is called "Anna".

Thanks Sam.

[ominous music]

No.

No.

No.

Wait!

Zoom in on that one.

Anastasia.

Still in the game.

Give me the phone.

Now.

[dramatic music]

[ominous sounds]

For ever and ever.

[phone ringing]

Yes?

The one you just sent me, the one with the long blonde hair.

If the opportunity presents itself, don't hesitate.

And do it quickly.

[ominous sounds]

[Van Helsing humming]

Thank you for that.

[singing opera music]

yes.

[singing together]

[Sydney] What?

Where are you?

[suspenseful music]

[Jess] So?

Let's hear it.

Let's hear it.

Shit, I don't know where to start.

How about the beginning?

Okay.

Look, just listen to the whole story before you decide I'm crazy, okay?

Okay.

Promise?

I promise.

Okay.

[Jess] Well vampires represent transition

and you're in a transition right now with your job

and your feelings of being thieved.

Vampires thieve. Okay let me get this straight.

[mysterious music]

You're dreaming about vampires, and then--

No, It's not just vampires.

It's these women and this woman

and they're not real vampires.

[ominous sounds]

But it's not just dreams, it's more than dreams.

Okay, it's more than dreams.

OW!

It's much more than dreams.

Okay, well then what is it exactly?

You know what, let me just show you, okay?

[ominous music]

[Jess] So?

[grunts]

[Jess] no vampires yet?

They can see me.

Who can see you?

I think it has something to do with Artemis,

and the woman that I met there, Anna.

Except in my dreams, she goes by Anastasia.

Anastasia?

In my dreams, yeah.

Seriously?

Yes, seriously!

Okay, whoa.

Why do you think they're watching you?

I don't know, it's got something to do with this website.

That you can't find...

No.

It's a tough one.

[scary sounds]

[suspenseful music]

Is the lady of the house in?

Look, you don't click on anything, it just starts.

It's not like a regular website.

Sam explained it, like some...

Hold on, hold on, um, Sam?

Sam is a degenerate sociopath.

You know not every guy you sleep with is a sociopath, Jess.

I can't believe you just brought that up.

Has it ever occurred to you that Sam is behind this?

[Sydney] Trust me Jess, this has nothing to do with Sam.

Or any other man for that matter.

[ominous music]

Oh shit, it's late. I've got to go home.

Okay.

I'm sorry, Jess.

No, no, no, don't be stupid.

Nothing to be sorry about at all.

Look, I can stay here if you want.

But we have to go to bed. I have a huge, huge day tomorrow.

No, no, no. You go.

I'm going to crash.

I'll be fine.

I will put you to bed then.

No, I've been sleeping fine out here, actually.

But thanks.

Goodnight.

Call me, okay? If you need anything.

[ominous music]

[ominous sounds]

Just a scratch.

[knocking on door]

[knocking on door]

Hello?

Hello?

[Anna] Sydney?

[ominous sounds]

[Anna] Sydney, you have to let me in.

Please, come in.

[ominous music]

[Van Helsing] At least we now know the wood bullets are effective.

I followed her into the building.

There's no way she could have got out.

Not without me knowing.

[Van Helsing] Anastasia must have projected from the building.

Now she would not have done that except for a very good reason.

[Van Helsing] A feeding would not suffice.

And frankly, neither would Karpov's presence.

We must find this woman and determine if she has fallen under their spell.

And if she has?

If she has...

We must kill her.

We have no choice.

Hello?

[Tone] Who's this?

It's from the Matriarch's computer.

From her computer?

Well, luck may be on our side.

This could be her.

How do we find her?

We don't.

Oh God!

[ominous sounds]

[door opening]

- Oh! - Jesus.

[inaudible]

Good talking to you.

Do you know this woman?

Her name.

Sydney.

Sydney St. James.

[Sydney] Sam...

[ominous sounds]

[suspenseful music]

I need to get out of here now.

God, yes!

Meet me at the airport.

Jess?

Jess!

[ominous sounds]

Jesus!

Hello, Sydney.

How did you get in here?

Are you going somewhere?

Yes.

Yes?

Hmm-mm.

Why?

I feel like I'm losing my mind.

You're not losing your mind Sydney.

Far from it.

I don't understand any of this.

Understanding is not important.

Being true to your calling is.

[phone ringing]

I found the dungeon.

Hello?

[Van Helsing] Ah, Miss St. James.

[ominous sounds]

My name is Van Helsing, Dr. Abraham van Helsing.

You met a colleague of mine earlier.

The man in the dungeon?

He saved you?

That's what we're here for, to protect you.

You must stay right where you are, we'll be there in moments.

Miss. St. James?

Hello?

Sam?

[ominous sounds]

Sam, I thought you were dead!

Are you okay?

Sam?

[Sydney] Sam!

If Anastasia is with her, take no chances.

Kill them both.

For luck.

[suspenseful music]

Take this, and this.

You will stay here.

If anyone but us comes into this corridor leave immediately.

But I want to go in there with you.

No my son, not this time.

You're safe now.

There's much time.

Everything will be better than you can possibly imagine.

- Your life will be all that you ever wanted. - Your life will be over.

Make no mistake Sydney, this demon cares nothing for you.

Her own survival is all that matters.

Kill them!

Where is she?

All you have to do is deny them. Without you they have no hope.

Savor the last moments of your miserable existence.

Who are you?

I need to check you for bite marks.

I wasn't bitten.

Leave me alone.

You're afraid of us, Sydney.

He's threatened everything they believe.

Once you join us you'll see this isn't a heaven you have to suffer to enter.

Tone!

Tone?

I'm alright.

She hasn't been bitten.

You're sure?

Positive.

Stay back.

Sydney!

Sam!

[suspenseful music]

Anastasia.

Is there no end to your ridiculous family?

Worthless trinket.

Evil ones are obsessed with death.

We exist within the Natural Order.

We only take what we need.

You and your kind defile nature and God.

What do you know of God?

I know there is a divine order, and you are no part of it.

All living things must die.

Yes.

All living things must di.

Anna!

[dramatic music]

[knocking on door]

[knocking on door]