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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:03:47,300 --> 00:03:50,600 It's not like that. It's an exaggeration. 2 00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:53,900 He has just got a certain success with the ladies. 3 00:03:54,100 --> 00:03:55,400 That's all. 4 00:04:25,500 --> 00:04:27,100 I'm not having it! 5 00:04:28,100 --> 00:04:30,400 Out! I can't have this! 6 00:04:30,600 --> 00:04:35,400 In my own house? I can't call it my own. My own house! Out! 7 00:04:35,700 --> 00:04:38,500 I am a schoolteacher, and I have to concentrate! 8 00:04:38,800 --> 00:04:39,800 Out! 9 00:04:40,200 --> 00:04:42,500 Need a steadying influence, that's what. 10 00:04:42,800 --> 00:04:46,500 That's what we need in this house, a real steadying influence. 11 00:04:48,000 --> 00:04:49,200 A monk! 12 00:04:49,600 --> 00:04:52,800 There must be monks or older men who are accountants... 13 00:04:53,200 --> 00:04:55,600 ...poor old men in sexless professions. 14 00:04:58,500 --> 00:05:01,700 "Just come to London? Nowhere to stay?" 15 00:05:01,800 --> 00:05:05,300 And glad of it we are! No trouble, us monks. 16 00:05:12,400 --> 00:05:15,900 Or some young lady, looking for a clean home, in clean surroundings. 17 00:05:26,600 --> 00:05:28,100 Just watch where you're treading. 18 00:05:28,300 --> 00:05:30,100 -After kicks? -Trampling eager. 19 00:05:30,300 --> 00:05:31,600 -For a fall. -I'm bound. 20 00:05:31,700 --> 00:05:33,900 -It's all happening. -lt'll end in tears. 21 00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:35,600 And no prince charming with a barrow. 22 00:05:35,800 --> 00:05:37,400 -Drugs. -I'm bound to disappoint. 23 00:05:37,600 --> 00:05:39,300 -Pupils of her eyes. -Look at her looking. 24 00:05:39,500 --> 00:05:42,100 I know what she wants, and it isn't the YWCA. 25 00:05:42,300 --> 00:05:45,200 Hoping, that's what she's doing. Hoping for being debauched. 26 00:05:45,300 --> 00:05:47,600 -Bound to end in tears. -lnnocent eyes of blue. 27 00:05:47,700 --> 00:05:50,100 What her legs are walking her into. 28 00:05:51,500 --> 00:05:53,400 -London? -Yes. 29 00:05:54,200 --> 00:05:55,300 Lovely. 30 00:07:24,700 --> 00:07:28,000 The guest book. Please restrict your comment to one word. 31 00:07:34,200 --> 00:07:35,400 My chair! 32 00:07:36,400 --> 00:07:38,400 -My chair! -My hair! 33 00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:40,300 What am I going to sit on? 34 00:07:40,400 --> 00:07:42,300 And there are gonna be some changes made. 35 00:07:42,500 --> 00:07:44,200 What was that, Colin? 36 00:07:44,700 --> 00:07:48,300 Can you spare a moment, Tolen? I don't mind about the chair. 37 00:07:48,500 --> 00:07:51,500 -I realize they've got to sit. -My hair! 38 00:07:52,200 --> 00:07:54,900 -You what, Colin? -Not now. I can't talk now. 39 00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:57,000 Have you something to say, Colin? 40 00:07:57,500 --> 00:08:00,300 It was only a comment. This is neither the time nor the place. 41 00:08:00,400 --> 00:08:02,700 -Got a woman yet, Colin? -I knew you'd say that. 42 00:08:02,900 --> 00:08:04,400 Shut up. 43 00:08:04,700 --> 00:08:07,300 Shall I show you, Colin? Shall I advise you? 44 00:08:07,500 --> 00:08:11,100 -Women like to be dominated. -Keep your advice to yourself! 45 00:08:11,400 --> 00:08:12,700 Certainly. 46 00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:27,200 The motorcycle is, I consider, their god, I find, 47 00:08:27,700 --> 00:08:30,800 -Is it? -It's merely high spirits, really, 48 00:08:31,100 --> 00:08:33,300 -Merely? -Every lane's a speedway, 49 00:08:33,400 --> 00:08:35,500 I blame the internal combustion, 50 00:08:35,700 --> 00:08:39,000 -They rule the streets, -I'd rule them, Conscription, 51 00:08:39,200 --> 00:08:42,100 S he'll regret she didn't wear a safety device. 52 00:08:46,000 --> 00:08:48,600 I feel for her chest, that's my feeling, 53 00:08:50,500 --> 00:08:53,200 -They've ruined the sea for me. -I'm bound. 54 00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:55,800 Legs up, all up the road. 55 00:08:55,900 --> 00:08:58,700 -I'm bound by my age, -Skirts up, showing all, 56 00:08:58,900 --> 00:09:00,100 -Where? -Where? 57 00:09:00,300 --> 00:09:01,500 -Who? -Where? 58 00:09:02,300 --> 00:09:05,400 Out all night and then a windy ride on a motorbike. 59 00:09:06,600 --> 00:09:09,100 -I think not. -That's no behavior. 60 00:09:09,200 --> 00:09:10,200 Out! 61 00:09:10,900 --> 00:09:14,500 Brown. You're all brown. Look at your hall. 62 00:09:14,700 --> 00:09:17,300 -I had to make a start. -Thank you. Out! 63 00:09:17,400 --> 00:09:21,400 Sick and tired of brown next to green. I hate green. 64 00:09:21,600 --> 00:09:24,900 -You'll like it when it's done. -lf I'd known you was a secret painter-- 65 00:09:25,100 --> 00:09:26,100 When it's finished. 66 00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:28,700 -Was you leaving an address? -For you? 67 00:09:29,200 --> 00:09:31,600 -I was not. -No more men. 68 00:09:32,500 --> 00:09:36,000 Some young lady, looking for a clean home with clean surroundings. 69 00:09:37,400 --> 00:09:40,400 Just come to London, nowhere to stay, and glad of it they are, 70 00:09:40,600 --> 00:09:44,900 Of course, I haven't got a daughter, Silent night, so it doesn't affect me, 71 00:09:45,100 --> 00:09:48,600 If you ask me, they're a new brand of person altogether,,, 72 00:09:48,900 --> 00:09:50,900 ,,,with their image they give, 73 00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:54,800 If that's all they can say of the hand that suckled them,,, 74 00:09:55,000 --> 00:09:57,300 ,,,I'm glad I'm on my last left leg, 75 00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:04,000 They're creeping back, the streets are full of them, 76 00:10:57,000 --> 00:10:59,600 -The streets are full of them! -I blame the army, 77 00:10:59,800 --> 00:11:02,600 -It's all strip and look big, -What has the cartoon come to? 78 00:11:02,800 --> 00:11:06,600 They do make better soldiers for it, Some blame the army, I don 't, 79 00:11:06,900 --> 00:11:08,100 Which army? 80 00:11:08,200 --> 00:11:11,600 National Service made a man of me, taught me the value of the belly laugh, 81 00:11:11,900 --> 00:11:13,100 -I blame-- -Shut up, 82 00:11:13,100 --> 00:11:16,500 I blame the teachers, if you ask me, That's my opinion, 83 00:11:17,200 --> 00:11:20,100 They have no conception, the teachers, really, I think, 84 00:11:22,300 --> 00:11:25,100 It's all milk in the schools now, isn 't it? 85 00:11:25,300 --> 00:11:28,300 -I blame the National Health, -I failed milk, 86 00:11:30,600 --> 00:11:34,200 They should have more tighter teachers, who 've seen the world, 87 00:11:34,400 --> 00:11:36,500 I've seen many a foreign part, 88 00:11:38,700 --> 00:11:42,100 Throw out the milk and bring back the belting, I advocate, 89 00:11:42,300 --> 00:11:44,000 That's what I froggle, 90 00:11:54,300 --> 00:11:55,600 Charlie! 91 00:11:55,800 --> 00:11:58,300 Come on up, Charles, and give me the blackguard. 92 00:12:03,400 --> 00:12:04,700 The YWCA? 93 00:12:04,800 --> 00:12:06,000 -ls it? -They're not in. 94 00:12:06,200 --> 00:12:08,100 -Windsor, are they? -What? 95 00:12:08,800 --> 00:12:11,600 -Tart, is it? -No, I'm looking for the YWCA. 96 00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:16,200 -The YW-- -Not here. 97 00:12:16,200 --> 00:12:19,200 We've never seen you before. Never. 98 00:12:19,400 --> 00:12:22,500 -He's been posted for his mother. -Try the orderly room. 99 00:12:22,800 --> 00:12:25,300 -Are you dancing? -S'cuse boots I am, darling. 100 00:12:25,500 --> 00:12:28,300 Haven't been west for a twelvemonth. So, I'm going ginger. 101 00:12:28,400 --> 00:12:30,500 -Married, are you? -No, I'm still young. 102 00:12:30,700 --> 00:12:32,900 Your best plan, I suggest, is the orderly room. 103 00:12:33,100 --> 00:12:34,800 Only we're in our bearskins. 104 00:12:38,700 --> 00:12:40,200 The YWCA? 105 00:12:40,500 --> 00:12:42,600 Can't help you, love. I'm on the bottling. 106 00:12:44,700 --> 00:12:47,300 -In the schools,,,, -We walked eight miles, 107 00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:50,600 -I walked 12 miles, -Kip, milk and biscuits, 108 00:12:50,700 --> 00:12:53,100 Can you wonder they're screaming out for roughage? 109 00:12:53,300 --> 00:12:56,900 We walked 20 miles barefoot to save dad's boots, 110 00:12:57,200 --> 00:13:01,700 -Excuse me, the YWCA, please. -First right, second left, straight across. 111 00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:04,500 -Can't miss it. -Thanks, awfully. 112 00:13:09,900 --> 00:13:11,600 That's not the YW. 113 00:13:13,800 --> 00:13:15,500 We are here today,,,, 114 00:13:15,600 --> 00:13:16,600 -It's up, -She's in, 115 00:13:16,800 --> 00:13:19,900 -Is it announced? -Here, at the heartbeat of a great nation, 116 00:13:20,100 --> 00:13:23,500 -Here today, great-- -Well-served by the finest, 117 00:13:23,800 --> 00:13:26,300 We walked 30 miles with gun and camera, 118 00:13:26,500 --> 00:13:29,800 -Great, great, -They're trained for it, 119 00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:32,300 Heritage in motion, 120 00:13:32,400 --> 00:13:35,900 God bless her sale and all who bought it, and I'm in labor, 121 00:13:36,400 --> 00:13:40,100 The angle of incidence is equal to the angle of reflection. 122 00:13:40,400 --> 00:13:44,600 The angle of incidence is equal to the angle of reflection. 123 00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:49,300 -The sine of the angle of incidence... -The sine of the angle of incidence... 124 00:13:49,600 --> 00:13:52,500 ...divided by the sine of the angle of refraction... 125 00:13:52,800 --> 00:13:55,700 ...divided by the sine of the angle of refraction... 126 00:13:55,800 --> 00:13:57,000 ...is constant. 127 00:13:57,300 --> 00:13:58,600 ...is constant. 128 00:14:38,500 --> 00:14:42,200 -Not that simple, is it? -Sir? That hurt, sir. 129 00:14:42,400 --> 00:14:43,900 You steaming nit, sir. 130 00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:45,900 Yes. 131 00:14:46,100 --> 00:14:47,600 Served the little bastard right. 132 00:14:47,700 --> 00:14:51,100 No, no! In this beautiful school? 133 00:14:52,700 --> 00:14:56,700 You see, I tried to be unsympathetic, because it's wrong. Isn't it wrong? 134 00:14:57,000 --> 00:14:58,300 I'm a failure. 135 00:15:00,100 --> 00:15:03,400 -I never get it where I want it. -I don't think they'd rape me. 136 00:15:03,700 --> 00:15:06,500 -Do you? -I don't know. 137 00:15:06,700 --> 00:15:10,300 -Yes. I mean, no. Why? -Best place is tight and hard... 138 00:15:10,500 --> 00:15:12,700 ...between the eyes on the bone where it hurts. 139 00:15:12,900 --> 00:15:15,700 I'm usually just off. Never get a bang-on shot. 140 00:15:15,800 --> 00:15:16,900 -Off? -Rape. 141 00:15:16,900 --> 00:15:19,800 Exchange teacher out at Camberwell. Part-time actress. 142 00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:21,800 -I had a beauty once. -Actress? 143 00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:24,300 Your class. She said you have no control. 144 00:15:24,500 --> 00:15:28,800 Skipping ricochet off a desk lid right up his nostril. His left one. 145 00:15:29,100 --> 00:15:31,500 No, I tell a lie, his right nostril. 146 00:15:31,600 --> 00:15:34,100 Half an inch of yellow chalk vanished from view. 147 00:15:34,300 --> 00:15:37,000 -Very satisfying. -The way your class was behaving! 148 00:15:37,300 --> 00:15:39,400 -My class? -Their behavior.... 149 00:15:40,100 --> 00:15:44,100 Her class was doing the behaving! My lads are made of flesh. 150 00:15:44,200 --> 00:15:48,300 All that leaping up and down in those.... That's what I behavior! 151 00:15:48,800 --> 00:15:50,500 That's provocative behavior! 152 00:15:50,600 --> 00:15:53,300 We've all got to make allowances, find our equilibrium. 153 00:15:53,400 --> 00:15:55,400 At every turn, how? 154 00:16:43,500 --> 00:16:47,600 I thought I would never see such purity of pattern, absolute rightness. 155 00:16:47,800 --> 00:16:51,700 I must please you, and I think I can. Don't fail me now. 156 00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:55,400 Or I'll never be able to trust myself with a woman ever again. 157 00:16:56,300 --> 00:16:57,600 Try it on. 158 00:16:58,100 --> 00:17:01,300 I'm sure. I know, absolutely, I can please you. 159 00:17:01,400 --> 00:17:02,800 Show me. 160 00:17:04,500 --> 00:17:05,800 Wait for me. 161 00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:17,800 I thought I would never see such purity of pattern, absolute rightness. 162 00:17:18,100 --> 00:17:21,200 I must please you, and I think I can. Don't fail me. 163 00:17:21,400 --> 00:17:24,500 Else I shall never be able to trust myself with a woman again, ever. 164 00:17:24,800 --> 00:17:27,300 Try it on. I'm sure. 165 00:17:27,500 --> 00:17:31,100 I know I can please you. Show me. Wait for me. 166 00:18:09,600 --> 00:18:13,100 I thought I would never see such purity of pattern, absolute rightness. 167 00:18:13,300 --> 00:18:16,000 I must please you, and I think can. 168 00:18:16,300 --> 00:18:18,200 Don't fail me now. 169 00:18:18,200 --> 00:18:22,500 Because I shall never be able to trust myself with a woman again, ever. 170 00:18:22,900 --> 00:18:24,300 Try it on. 171 00:18:24,600 --> 00:18:28,000 I'm sure. I know, absolutely, I can help you. 172 00:18:28,800 --> 00:18:31,800 -How much is this coat, please? -Show me. 173 00:18:33,400 --> 00:18:34,800 Wait for me. 174 00:18:35,700 --> 00:18:37,500 If I should see this girl.... 175 00:18:39,600 --> 00:18:41,600 Should I come across? 176 00:18:41,900 --> 00:18:45,300 Perhaps, would you show me? If.... Tolen! 177 00:18:45,700 --> 00:18:47,700 Why aren't you in school, Colin? 178 00:18:48,300 --> 00:18:49,900 -lsn't it nippy? -No. 179 00:18:49,900 --> 00:18:52,600 Free period and a half day for me while they have sports. 180 00:18:52,900 --> 00:18:55,200 I don't find it cold. You don't eat the right food. 181 00:18:55,400 --> 00:18:57,700 -It's not that, Tolen. -It's about that spare room. 182 00:18:57,900 --> 00:19:00,700 -You've at long last decided to let. -Listen. 183 00:19:00,800 --> 00:19:02,500 How can I get a-- 184 00:19:04,900 --> 00:19:06,800 How can I get a woman? 185 00:19:07,200 --> 00:19:09,200 -Want advice? -How? 186 00:19:09,300 --> 00:19:12,100 -The right food is important. -It's not that, listen! 187 00:19:12,400 --> 00:19:17,100 If I should see this girl, listen, should I come across.... 188 00:19:18,600 --> 00:19:20,300 Would you show me? 189 00:19:22,300 --> 00:19:26,100 -You mean, how I get women? -Yes. 190 00:19:26,300 --> 00:19:28,700 -Yes, I mean that. -But you haven't even started. 191 00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:31,000 -The right food. -The right food doesn't-- 192 00:19:31,100 --> 00:19:33,200 It's of the utmost importance, of the essence. 193 00:19:33,400 --> 00:19:35,200 One's body needs protein and energy. 194 00:19:35,400 --> 00:19:36,400 Yes, but look-- 195 00:19:36,600 --> 00:19:38,800 I find that with my perhaps unusual sexual demands... 196 00:19:39,000 --> 00:19:42,300 ...my body requires at least twice the normal daily intake of protein. 197 00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:44,900 I won't need that much, will l? 198 00:19:45,300 --> 00:19:46,800 -Protein! -No. 199 00:19:47,100 --> 00:19:50,400 You could do yourself damage. Stoke up the fire, block up the chimney. 200 00:19:50,600 --> 00:19:53,600 -Have you got a piece of paper, Tolen? -Cheese, eggs, milk, meat. 201 00:19:53,900 --> 00:19:56,700 -I drink about four pints of milk a day. -I want to get it down! 202 00:19:56,900 --> 00:19:58,500 -I eat a pound of steak. -Steak. 203 00:19:58,700 --> 00:20:01,800 Needn't be the most expensive. Cheaper cuts have the same value. 204 00:20:01,900 --> 00:20:03,500 -For instance, skirt. -Skirt. 205 00:20:03,700 --> 00:20:05,500 -Skirt. -ls that it? 206 00:20:05,500 --> 00:20:07,100 Cheese, eggs, milk, meat, skirt. 207 00:20:07,300 --> 00:20:08,400 -ls that it? -What? 208 00:20:08,500 --> 00:20:10,300 -How you do it? -Skirt is meat. 209 00:20:10,600 --> 00:20:12,200 How, though? How? 210 00:20:12,400 --> 00:20:16,200 I could tell you what I know intellectually, what my experience has been. 211 00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:18,200 But beyond that, it's intuition. 212 00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:23,200 -And intuition is, to some degree, inborn. -"lntuition is, to some degree, inborn." 213 00:20:23,500 --> 00:20:27,100 Intuition is, to some degree, inborn. 214 00:20:27,900 --> 00:20:31,300 But the feeling can be developed with experience and confidence. 215 00:20:31,400 --> 00:20:35,200 In certain people, to some degree, a man can develop the knack. 216 00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:38,000 "A man can develop the knack." 217 00:20:38,200 --> 00:20:40,600 A man can develop the knack, 218 00:20:43,900 --> 00:20:45,300 -Look at women. -Yes! 219 00:20:47,600 --> 00:20:49,700 -I can't hear you! -Women, 220 00:20:49,900 --> 00:20:52,000 Not individuals, Just types, 221 00:21:01,900 --> 00:21:03,900 That last one had very nice earlobes. 222 00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:05,200 Earlobes? 223 00:21:06,800 --> 00:21:10,300 -How do I acquire the knack? -Yes, how? The knack! 224 00:21:10,400 --> 00:21:13,200 Now, first you must establish contact. 225 00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:15,300 Yes! Contact? 226 00:21:15,500 --> 00:21:17,600 -I'm busy. -No, you were telling me. 227 00:21:17,700 --> 00:21:20,400 -Establish contact. -Yes, and I'm not referring to touch. 228 00:21:20,600 --> 00:21:22,400 -Not to touch. -Tactile communication. 229 00:21:22,600 --> 00:21:24,600 -But that comes later. -Touch comes later! 230 00:21:24,800 --> 00:21:27,100 Excuse me. I mean, there's a feeling between you. 231 00:21:27,300 --> 00:21:28,300 A feeling! 232 00:21:28,400 --> 00:21:29,700 -You're aware of her. -Aware! 233 00:21:29,900 --> 00:21:31,600 -The girl's aware of you. -She's aware! 234 00:21:31,700 --> 00:21:34,600 -There's a vibration between-- -Vibration! 235 00:21:35,800 --> 00:21:38,500 Hold on! It's fine for you with this job. 236 00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:42,300 I don't get this in the common room. Wait, tell me! 237 00:21:49,600 --> 00:21:52,000 Stop! No, don't stop! 238 00:21:52,100 --> 00:21:55,400 The knack! You haven't finished telling me! 239 00:21:55,700 --> 00:21:58,500 Tolen! I've wet my trousers! 240 00:21:58,700 --> 00:22:01,700 You know that you need help? You do know that, don't you? 241 00:22:01,800 --> 00:22:04,900 Yes. I mean, obviously, yes, I need help. 242 00:22:05,100 --> 00:22:06,000 Help! 243 00:22:06,200 --> 00:22:09,400 Tell me, how many women have you had? 244 00:22:10,300 --> 00:22:11,800 I was late starting. 245 00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:13,300 -Two? -Late! 246 00:22:13,400 --> 00:22:14,800 Two women in two years. 247 00:22:14,900 --> 00:22:16,800 Some of us have had more women in two hours. 248 00:22:16,900 --> 00:22:18,400 Late starting! 249 00:22:22,400 --> 00:22:24,300 I have a suggestion to make to you. 250 00:22:24,400 --> 00:22:26,700 A suggestion which I think you'll find interesting... 251 00:22:26,900 --> 00:22:28,200 ...and will help you very much. 252 00:22:28,400 --> 00:22:30,900 -I've been soaked. -It's an idea I've had. 253 00:22:31,100 --> 00:22:32,100 Here, my bed. 254 00:22:32,300 --> 00:22:34,500 Do you think it's any good, me getting a bigger bed? 255 00:22:34,700 --> 00:22:36,300 -Two women in two years. -Late! 256 00:22:38,500 --> 00:22:42,000 Now, I'm cramped in that bed. Will you shut the window? 257 00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:45,600 -Your bed is ample for your needs. -I'm gonna get pneumonia. 258 00:22:45,700 --> 00:22:48,600 -But future plans? -As you know, I have a number of friends. 259 00:22:48,700 --> 00:22:50,700 -Yes. -Men. 260 00:22:50,900 --> 00:22:54,500 They can help you as I can help you. I was thinking of Rory McBryde. 261 00:22:54,800 --> 00:22:56,800 -Rory? -McBryde. 262 00:22:57,000 --> 00:23:00,600 -The window! -Rory McBryde is a man. 263 00:23:00,800 --> 00:23:02,300 A clever man, a gifted man... 264 00:23:02,500 --> 00:23:04,800 ...a man I can respect, who knows many things. 265 00:23:04,900 --> 00:23:07,800 Rory McBryde was doing things at 13 that you haven't ever done. 266 00:23:08,000 --> 00:23:09,100 Things you don't know about. 267 00:23:09,300 --> 00:23:10,700 -What sort of things? -ln a moment. 268 00:23:10,800 --> 00:23:14,100 -Has he got the knack? Or these things? -First, let me tell you my idea. 269 00:23:14,400 --> 00:23:17,400 Look, I really do need a bigger bed. Don't l, really? 270 00:23:17,600 --> 00:23:19,100 I have a number of girlfriends. 271 00:23:19,300 --> 00:23:22,200 Regular girlfriends, regular women, women I regularly make. 272 00:23:22,400 --> 00:23:25,100 -These things-- -Rory has a number of regular women, too. 273 00:23:25,300 --> 00:23:27,200 Not quite so many as I have, but several. 274 00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:31,500 Rory and I were talking, comparing notes, and we decided it would be a good idea... 275 00:23:31,800 --> 00:23:34,800 ...if we saw each other more often, even live near each other. 276 00:23:35,300 --> 00:23:37,100 Perhaps in the same house. 277 00:23:38,200 --> 00:23:40,100 -What, here? -Share our women. 278 00:23:40,200 --> 00:23:41,100 Share? 279 00:23:41,300 --> 00:23:43,800 Of course, Rory realizes it could be dangerous for him. 280 00:23:43,900 --> 00:23:47,600 -He might lose a few of his women. -He wouldn't want that, would he? 281 00:23:48,300 --> 00:23:49,700 I mean, it's a big house. 282 00:23:49,800 --> 00:23:53,600 Rory is well aware that in the long run he will profit by the arrangement. 283 00:23:53,900 --> 00:23:56,800 He will learn much from the women who have been with me. 284 00:23:57,700 --> 00:23:59,000 No. 285 00:23:59,100 --> 00:24:01,600 -No? -No, not that spare room. 286 00:24:02,600 --> 00:24:04,800 That spare room needs a steadying influence. 287 00:24:05,000 --> 00:24:07,800 I would consider letting you come in on this arrangement. 288 00:24:08,700 --> 00:24:10,600 -Sharing? -You'd learn a great many things. 289 00:24:10,800 --> 00:24:13,200 -What sort of things? -lt'd be a privilege for you. 290 00:24:13,400 --> 00:24:14,500 No. 291 00:24:14,800 --> 00:24:17,000 I feel you deserve to be helped. 292 00:24:17,300 --> 00:24:19,600 Look, couldn't I just share.... 293 00:24:20,800 --> 00:24:23,300 -Do you think he will? -lf I ask him, he will. 294 00:24:23,500 --> 00:24:26,200 No, I don't think so. 295 00:24:26,400 --> 00:24:28,900 You'll like him. I'll tell him to call round. 296 00:24:29,100 --> 00:24:32,500 Perhaps not, it's a dirty room. Needs a lot of work on it. 297 00:24:32,700 --> 00:24:36,100 I wouldn't like any friend of yours.... It needs redecorating. 298 00:24:36,300 --> 00:24:38,400 It's no place to share women in and things. 299 00:24:38,600 --> 00:24:40,500 Look, what sort of things? 300 00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:43,800 The bed! The bed's terrible. 301 00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:45,700 He could not do.... 302 00:24:46,200 --> 00:24:48,500 He could have my old one when I get my new one. 303 00:24:48,800 --> 00:24:51,000 Rory McBryde has got a six-foot bed. 304 00:24:51,100 --> 00:24:54,200 -He wouldn't find mine big enough? -No. 305 00:24:54,500 --> 00:24:56,800 Couldn't I just share your women? 306 00:24:57,000 --> 00:24:59,100 You don't want him rampaging through the house... 307 00:24:59,300 --> 00:25:01,600 ...all over the place with women and things. 308 00:25:01,900 --> 00:25:05,100 A house full of women and sharing and doing things that none of us... 309 00:25:05,300 --> 00:25:06,900 ...ever dreamt of doing before! 310 00:25:50,700 --> 00:25:54,100 No. I could not. I couldn't stand the pace. Really. 311 00:25:54,300 --> 00:25:58,600 I'm not fussy about letting that room because it's always as well having a spare. 312 00:25:58,900 --> 00:26:02,000 You find it very useful to avoid clashes on the stairs, don't you? 313 00:26:02,300 --> 00:26:06,000 -No. I couldn't stand the pace. -Rory has a Chinese girl. 314 00:26:06,400 --> 00:26:08,100 -Slinky. -Slinky. 315 00:26:08,300 --> 00:26:10,200 Chinese, very slinky, very nice. 316 00:26:10,300 --> 00:26:12,200 -Do very well for you. -Chinese? 317 00:26:12,400 --> 00:26:16,600 -I'll tell him to call round, look at the room. -No. I couldn't stand the pace. 318 00:26:16,800 --> 00:26:18,500 Not two of you. I couldn't. 319 00:26:27,600 --> 00:26:29,200 I burnt my hand. 320 00:26:29,700 --> 00:26:31,100 -Colin? -No! 321 00:26:31,300 --> 00:26:34,300 -And a Swedish girl. -Swedish? 322 00:26:35,200 --> 00:26:36,700 Swedish. 323 00:26:37,800 --> 00:26:40,500 No! I couldn't stand it. It would drive me mad. 324 00:26:40,700 --> 00:26:43,500 Two of them? The stairs would be on the continual go. 325 00:26:43,700 --> 00:26:46,300 All those women. My blood's not up to it. 326 00:26:46,500 --> 00:26:50,300 And what about the bathroom? You'd never ever get near to the bathroom. 327 00:26:56,000 --> 00:26:58,000 That's not a gross exaggeration. 328 00:27:00,400 --> 00:27:02,100 I'm not having it. 329 00:27:04,900 --> 00:27:06,500 Having it. 330 00:27:07,900 --> 00:27:08,900 No! 331 00:27:09,900 --> 00:27:13,600 I'm not having it. Having it. No! 332 00:27:14,500 --> 00:27:15,900 Having it. No! 333 00:27:16,000 --> 00:27:18,500 Having it. No! I'm not having it! 334 00:27:18,700 --> 00:27:20,300 Having it. No! 335 00:27:21,500 --> 00:27:22,900 No Rory in my house. 336 00:27:23,100 --> 00:27:26,600 One is enough. One lot of women is enough for any house. 337 00:27:38,300 --> 00:27:40,100 If a job is worth-- 338 00:27:40,200 --> 00:27:43,700 A job is worth nothing these days of jobbery in high places, 339 00:27:43,800 --> 00:27:46,800 -Look at the Cabinet, -You can't get a good cabinet for love, 340 00:27:47,100 --> 00:27:50,700 They don 't seem to have the same pride in their craft they used to have, 341 00:27:50,900 --> 00:27:54,700 Craft has been flung out of the window, It's all the human body now, 342 00:27:56,400 --> 00:27:58,800 I adore a piece of wood, its feel, 343 00:27:59,400 --> 00:28:03,000 I hope I always get a kick from the feel of a length of wood, 344 00:28:03,200 --> 00:28:07,500 -Homegrown loans for self-improvement, -He's making improvements all the time, 345 00:28:07,800 --> 00:28:11,700 Two houses in every garage by 1970, You can 't say fairer than that, 346 00:28:11,900 --> 00:28:15,600 -Of course, it harbors rats, you know? -Jerry-built. Pardon my French. 347 00:28:30,500 --> 00:28:34,300 There is mastery in a job well done if you have a way with tools, 348 00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:38,400 -A good workman never blames his,,,, -I do, I blame the screwdriver, 349 00:28:40,400 --> 00:28:44,000 -I like the twist of a good screw, -I'm bound, 350 00:28:44,300 --> 00:28:46,800 You can 't get a good splinter these days, 351 00:28:47,000 --> 00:28:49,900 The art's gone out of it, It's quicker by tube, 352 00:28:50,100 --> 00:28:52,600 I'm bound to ask for a good finish, 353 00:28:55,900 --> 00:28:57,000 I say,,,, 354 00:28:57,100 --> 00:28:59,900 -Shame to hide a good screw, -Workers' Playtime, 355 00:29:00,000 --> 00:29:03,000 She took off her wooden leg, and she put it on the mantelpiece, 356 00:29:03,200 --> 00:29:07,400 Then she took out her glass eye, Well, I'll never see the like again, 357 00:29:09,900 --> 00:29:11,700 That is indeed a job. 358 00:29:14,500 --> 00:29:17,400 -I can't get out. -I can't get in. 359 00:29:18,300 --> 00:29:21,000 -But I feel better. -ls Rory there? 360 00:29:22,100 --> 00:29:23,700 There. Rory. I sent him round. 361 00:29:23,800 --> 00:29:24,800 -ln? -There. 362 00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:26,300 Out! 363 00:29:30,100 --> 00:29:32,500 -What's he look like? -Tell him I'll be there. 364 00:29:32,600 --> 00:29:33,600 Never mind. 365 00:29:47,700 --> 00:29:52,000 Small, vigorous, balanced, sensitive in his movements, painting-- 366 00:29:52,200 --> 00:29:54,700 Painting? Doesn't sound like Rory. 367 00:29:59,200 --> 00:30:01,500 What the hell are you doing in Rory's room? 368 00:30:03,400 --> 00:30:04,600 Who's this? 369 00:30:05,500 --> 00:30:08,200 -It's not? -No, it's not. That window's filthy. 370 00:30:08,500 --> 00:30:11,100 -I'll wash them. -You've let the room. 371 00:30:11,300 --> 00:30:12,500 -Tom. -Colin. 372 00:30:12,600 --> 00:30:14,700 The door was open, and I saw it was brown... 373 00:30:14,900 --> 00:30:19,300 ...and I thought I'd get stuck in right away before you said no. Just once. 374 00:30:20,000 --> 00:30:22,000 -Your sign. -"Room to let." 375 00:30:22,200 --> 00:30:23,800 -I'll take it. -I hope you'll be happy. 376 00:30:24,000 --> 00:30:25,100 -Look at this filth. -Tolen. 377 00:30:25,200 --> 00:30:28,100 -I'm going to wash the windows. -I've got some Windowlene. 378 00:30:41,300 --> 00:30:42,700 Got it. 379 00:30:44,500 --> 00:30:49,100 "Wipe it on, Windowlene, wipe it off, window clean." 380 00:30:49,400 --> 00:30:53,500 Washing with water and polishing with paper would have less electrostatic action. 381 00:30:53,800 --> 00:30:57,700 Would repel dirt more efficiently. Try the other half. Go on. 382 00:30:58,300 --> 00:30:59,900 -What? -The other half. 383 00:31:03,300 --> 00:31:07,400 You do realize that in order to clean the window you have to wipe off the cleaner. 384 00:31:07,600 --> 00:31:10,100 The white stuff has to be polished off the window. 385 00:31:10,200 --> 00:31:13,700 -He's not going to leave it on. -You can't leave it on. 386 00:31:14,200 --> 00:31:17,600 "Wipe on sparingly with a dry cloth, then wipe off immediately." 387 00:31:18,200 --> 00:31:20,600 You're not gonna leave that stuff on. 388 00:31:21,000 --> 00:31:23,700 It's as good as net curtains, only better. 389 00:31:23,900 --> 00:31:26,700 -Net curtains? -You should paint your windows white. 390 00:31:26,900 --> 00:31:30,100 White reflects heat. All right when the bomb drops. 391 00:31:30,200 --> 00:31:33,100 -What? -Okay when the bomb drops. 392 00:31:43,200 --> 00:31:44,700 The YWCA? 393 00:32:00,100 --> 00:32:03,000 The YWCA. 394 00:32:03,300 --> 00:32:07,500 YW-YW-YWCA. Martin's Grove, West 2. 395 00:32:20,600 --> 00:32:22,300 It's for me. 396 00:32:24,800 --> 00:32:26,600 Eighth of December. 397 00:32:28,200 --> 00:32:29,700 Albert Hall. 398 00:32:31,000 --> 00:32:32,700 Rory McBryde. 399 00:32:34,600 --> 00:32:36,200 I'll tell her. 400 00:32:39,200 --> 00:32:41,500 Don't you ever let me catch you in here again. 401 00:32:41,700 --> 00:32:42,600 Sorry. 402 00:32:45,200 --> 00:32:49,300 -What's this? -Brown. I can't bear brown. 403 00:32:49,600 --> 00:32:50,600 This. 404 00:32:57,600 --> 00:33:00,600 -What? -I have a friend coming down the stairs. 405 00:33:00,800 --> 00:33:03,800 -I have a friend in Newcastle. -This furniture.... 406 00:33:04,000 --> 00:33:05,000 Doesn't impress me. 407 00:33:05,200 --> 00:33:07,200 She won't like clambering over furniture. 408 00:33:07,400 --> 00:33:10,300 If she was an elephant, that would impress me. Tell me she is. 409 00:33:10,500 --> 00:33:13,800 After being with me, a girl doesn't feel like clambering over furniture. 410 00:33:14,100 --> 00:33:15,600 After an elephant, neither would you. 411 00:33:15,700 --> 00:33:17,900 -Are you a homosexual? -No. 412 00:33:18,000 --> 00:33:19,900 Thanks all the same. 413 00:33:21,300 --> 00:33:25,200 -Tolen! Hold on! -Would you come this way, sir? 414 00:33:29,300 --> 00:33:30,500 Tolen! 415 00:33:34,800 --> 00:33:36,900 I'm glad I didn't put my stockings on. 416 00:33:49,400 --> 00:33:51,900 That damn stuff in the passage, you'll have to move it. 417 00:33:52,100 --> 00:33:53,300 He can use the window. 418 00:33:53,500 --> 00:33:55,800 -I said, move it. -I'm not having it in here. 419 00:33:55,900 --> 00:33:58,800 -I'm not having it in the passage. -I'm not having it in here. 420 00:33:59,000 --> 00:34:01,900 When you take a furnished room, you take the furniture as well. 421 00:34:02,100 --> 00:34:04,300 -Not that. -What's wrong with my furniture? 422 00:34:04,500 --> 00:34:07,100 I'm not having it in here, that's what's wrong with it. 423 00:34:07,200 --> 00:34:09,200 If I were you, I'd take it to the market. 424 00:34:09,400 --> 00:34:13,300 I beg your pardon. That's my furniture, and I'm not having you sell it. 425 00:34:17,700 --> 00:34:20,000 Typical Rory McBryde trick, that. 426 00:34:22,900 --> 00:34:24,600 We can put it on the top landing. 427 00:34:24,800 --> 00:34:27,100 -Outside my room? -No. Inside your room. 428 00:34:27,300 --> 00:34:29,900 -I hoped you'd be a steadying influence. -That furniture-- 429 00:34:30,000 --> 00:34:31,600 -How long? -What? 430 00:34:31,600 --> 00:34:33,000 How long did you take this time? 431 00:34:33,200 --> 00:34:34,500 -Did you? -How long? 432 00:34:34,700 --> 00:34:36,800 -Did you time me? -Did you time yourself? 433 00:34:36,900 --> 00:34:40,900 It's the bed, isn't it? That's what does it. And did you? Have you? 434 00:34:41,100 --> 00:34:43,400 -No more than 10 minutes. -10 minutes! 435 00:34:43,600 --> 00:34:45,300 It's the bed. 10 minutes! 436 00:34:45,500 --> 00:34:49,000 Do you think I'm so crude, so vulgar, as to time myself when I'm at a-- 437 00:34:49,300 --> 00:34:52,400 -10 minutes. -How big is your bed, Tolen? 438 00:34:52,500 --> 00:34:56,300 Ten minutes from wink to blink, from start to finish? 439 00:34:56,600 --> 00:34:57,700 From hello to good-bye? 440 00:34:57,800 --> 00:35:01,900 Ten minutes. You're sliding, man. You're slipping. You're letting us down. 441 00:35:02,100 --> 00:35:03,900 You can do better than that. 442 00:35:04,100 --> 00:35:07,000 Faster, man, faster. You've got the capacity. 443 00:35:07,200 --> 00:35:10,100 -No. He's got a six-foot bed. -Listen, Tolen, four. 444 00:35:10,300 --> 00:35:11,800 Dreams, I've got for you. 445 00:35:12,000 --> 00:35:14,900 Four minutes. Four minutes from start to finish. 446 00:35:15,100 --> 00:35:16,900 Get it down to four minutes. 447 00:35:17,000 --> 00:35:21,300 Yours is quite big, isn't it? How big is your bed? 448 00:35:22,200 --> 00:35:25,100 The four-minute mile. Like the four-minute mile. 449 00:35:25,300 --> 00:35:27,800 Heroic. Think. A new series in the Olympic games. 450 00:35:27,900 --> 00:35:29,800 British native and all-comers record. 451 00:35:30,000 --> 00:35:32,600 Yes, and then by discipline, by training, by application... 452 00:35:32,800 --> 00:35:36,100 ...three minutes 59 seconds, three minutes 55, three minutes 50. 453 00:35:36,300 --> 00:35:39,700 And then one day, one unimaginable day... 454 00:35:39,800 --> 00:35:41,800 ...three minutes from start to finish! 455 00:35:54,700 --> 00:35:57,600 -Excuse me. The YWCA, please. -Yes. 456 00:36:02,700 --> 00:36:06,200 Then take the first turning over, then once more around left. 457 00:36:06,300 --> 00:36:07,900 There you'll find it. 458 00:36:13,700 --> 00:36:16,200 -ls it nicer faster? -Nice? 459 00:36:16,300 --> 00:36:20,500 -Nice, that's not the point. -I'm getting a new bed. 460 00:36:21,300 --> 00:36:24,700 -What's Tolen's first name? -He says he hasn't got one. 461 00:36:24,900 --> 00:36:26,800 -Not got one? -Well, he never uses it. 462 00:36:27,000 --> 00:36:29,900 Look, I want.... I will want to bring my old bed down. 463 00:36:30,100 --> 00:36:32,600 -lf he never uses it-- -My bed downstairs. 464 00:36:32,800 --> 00:36:35,200 -He must have it. -There's too much stuff in the passage. 465 00:36:35,400 --> 00:36:40,200 -Why do you want to bring it downstairs? -I'm getting another, a bigger one, six-foot. 466 00:36:40,700 --> 00:36:44,100 -Through the window. How big? -Vast. 467 00:36:45,100 --> 00:36:46,900 I know where there's a big bed. 468 00:36:51,300 --> 00:36:52,800 That? 469 00:36:52,800 --> 00:36:56,300 No. I want something sexy, quilted, with a very loud noise. 470 00:36:56,600 --> 00:36:58,100 A lilt of lrish laughter? 471 00:36:58,200 --> 00:37:02,500 If you like. I just don't see meself in a cast-iron bed. 472 00:37:02,800 --> 00:37:06,100 One mustn't be misled by apparent metal fatigue. 473 00:37:14,600 --> 00:37:16,000 I'll take it! 474 00:37:16,800 --> 00:37:20,200 And it's twice as big as Tolen's, almost. 475 00:37:23,300 --> 00:37:25,900 -I'll take it. -I should. It's musical. 476 00:37:26,000 --> 00:37:30,200 How much? I don't care. I don't care how much. 477 00:37:31,200 --> 00:37:32,600 Hark at that. 478 00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:35,100 -You want it? -I want it. 479 00:37:37,200 --> 00:37:39,200 At 13, were you promiscuous? 480 00:37:39,400 --> 00:37:42,400 Weren't all of us, more or less, sexual failures? 481 00:37:42,900 --> 00:37:46,500 -Tolen isn't a sexual failure. -He needs it five hours a day, he says. 482 00:37:46,700 --> 00:37:49,200 Then he can't be a sexual failure, can he? 483 00:37:50,900 --> 00:37:53,000 He can't be a sexual failure. 484 00:37:53,900 --> 00:37:57,300 He can't be a sexual failure, having it five hours a day, can he? 485 00:37:57,500 --> 00:38:00,700 -And it's bigger than Tolen's. -ls it? 486 00:38:02,100 --> 00:38:04,100 He can't be though, can he? 487 00:38:10,700 --> 00:38:14,000 There. Chat her up. 488 00:38:14,600 --> 00:38:17,400 -Speak to her. Ask her the time. -No. 489 00:38:17,600 --> 00:38:19,200 Ask her to lend you six pence. 490 00:38:19,400 --> 00:38:22,500 No. You. I want to buy my bed. 491 00:38:22,900 --> 00:38:24,500 Off to the flat. 492 00:38:24,600 --> 00:38:26,200 -The YWCA? -Yeah. 493 00:38:26,400 --> 00:38:27,700 How much? 494 00:38:27,700 --> 00:38:30,300 -Here? -What? No. 495 00:38:30,400 --> 00:38:32,200 I'll ask if anyone has seen it. 496 00:38:32,400 --> 00:38:34,600 -Will you take it? -Yes. I'll take it. 497 00:38:34,700 --> 00:38:35,900 Have you seen it? 498 00:38:36,100 --> 00:38:38,200 -Have I seen what? -The YWCA. 499 00:38:39,800 --> 00:38:41,000 She wants.... 500 00:38:41,100 --> 00:38:44,000 -Through the streets? -Yes. Through the streets. 501 00:38:44,200 --> 00:38:45,800 -Would you like a lift? -A lift? 502 00:38:46,000 --> 00:38:47,900 -I can't bring it round. -To the YW. 503 00:38:48,000 --> 00:38:52,100 -Yes. Is it on your way? -We'll take it. We'll have it. I'll have it. 504 00:38:52,400 --> 00:38:55,100 -We'll walk it. -Certainly, it's on our way. 505 00:38:55,300 --> 00:38:56,700 Where is it? 506 00:39:01,000 --> 00:39:03,700 She's coming to the YW. 507 00:39:03,900 --> 00:39:05,200 With that bed? 508 00:39:05,400 --> 00:39:07,700 That's not a bed. It's an Edwardian trampoline. 509 00:39:07,800 --> 00:39:10,400 -It's a bed. -No. Isn't it, Colin? 510 00:39:10,600 --> 00:39:13,300 -No. It's my bed. -It's a bed. 511 00:39:13,500 --> 00:39:16,000 With wheels. It's wheeled traffic. 512 00:39:16,200 --> 00:39:19,300 -Wheel it away. Come on. -Wagon, ho! 513 00:39:20,700 --> 00:39:22,500 Mods and rockers, 514 00:39:25,900 --> 00:39:27,300 My bed! 515 00:39:38,500 --> 00:39:42,300 There's not a bus route in London free of its share of youth, vice, 516 00:39:42,600 --> 00:39:45,700 Hand back the city to those with their fair share of legs, 517 00:39:45,900 --> 00:39:49,400 They'll do anything but use the good feet they were born with, 518 00:39:49,600 --> 00:39:52,300 -Anything but walk, -Mine's the same, 519 00:39:52,400 --> 00:39:53,800 They'll settle, 520 00:39:53,900 --> 00:39:57,100 I wouldn 't be seen dead on a bed, from a personal angle, 521 00:39:57,300 --> 00:39:59,200 It's a young man 's game, 522 00:40:04,400 --> 00:40:08,500 I mean, I'm broad-minded, but a bed's place is definitely in the home, 523 00:40:08,800 --> 00:40:11,700 -Definitely, -We have our own sleeping arrangements, 524 00:40:11,900 --> 00:40:13,300 Mods and rockers, 525 00:40:17,500 --> 00:40:18,700 See that? 526 00:40:21,100 --> 00:40:23,700 Just a minute. I'll be back. 527 00:40:27,100 --> 00:40:30,000 Excuse me, sir. You're wanted on the other fern. 528 00:40:46,400 --> 00:40:48,400 It's all initiative now. 529 00:41:08,000 --> 00:41:10,700 I don't personally subscribe to that sort of program. 530 00:41:10,900 --> 00:41:12,400 They'll answer in court. 531 00:41:12,600 --> 00:41:16,100 I come from Hampton Wick myself, so I'm used to innuendo. 532 00:42:46,100 --> 00:42:50,900 -There's no national heritage anymore. -No. It's all on the National Health. 533 00:43:49,400 --> 00:43:51,100 I was never given the opportunity,,, 534 00:43:51,200 --> 00:43:54,000 ,,,to so much as breaststroke before I was sent to sea,,, 535 00:43:54,200 --> 00:43:56,100 ,,,and I'm much better for it, 536 00:44:33,400 --> 00:44:36,600 What's the most frightening building in London? 537 00:44:36,700 --> 00:44:39,200 Great Ormond Street Hospital for Children. 538 00:44:39,300 --> 00:44:40,600 I believe you're right. 539 00:44:40,800 --> 00:44:42,000 What's that? 540 00:44:42,100 --> 00:44:44,300 Great Ormond Street Hospital for Children. 541 00:44:44,500 --> 00:44:48,500 That's nice. That's true. That's a nice thing to say. 542 00:44:48,700 --> 00:44:50,200 Do you think so? 543 00:45:00,700 --> 00:45:03,100 -I've been picked up, haven't l? -Have you? 544 00:45:04,000 --> 00:45:05,500 Yes, I have, haven't l? 545 00:45:09,900 --> 00:45:11,100 Like a howdah. 546 00:45:11,300 --> 00:45:13,200 -A what? -Howdy do! 547 00:45:13,200 --> 00:45:14,600 Like on an elephant. 548 00:45:14,800 --> 00:45:18,300 You know, the lndians keep elephants the way we keep cows. 549 00:45:18,500 --> 00:45:19,600 It's true. 550 00:45:19,800 --> 00:45:22,500 I always wondered how big an elephant's udder was. 551 00:45:22,700 --> 00:45:25,600 My God. Imagine it swishing round and round. 552 00:45:25,700 --> 00:45:29,500 In Walt Disney's early films, there were cows and the censor cut the udders out. 553 00:45:29,800 --> 00:45:33,200 Yeah, so he put brassieres on them. Imagine. 554 00:45:33,500 --> 00:45:38,100 Jersey cows wear brassieres, it's true. Jersey cows wear brassieres. 555 00:45:38,300 --> 00:45:41,200 There's something wrong there. Cows shouldn't need brassieres. 556 00:45:41,300 --> 00:45:43,900 Human beings need them because they stand upright. 557 00:45:44,100 --> 00:45:47,100 They used to go on all fours, and they hung downwards, vertically. 558 00:45:47,300 --> 00:45:50,700 Now they stand upright, and it puts on this terrible strain. 559 00:45:51,000 --> 00:45:53,400 All right. All right, but it's true. 560 00:45:59,100 --> 00:46:02,600 -That wouldn't arise with elephants. -I wish you'd push more and talk less. 561 00:46:02,800 --> 00:46:03,700 Showing off. 562 00:46:03,800 --> 00:46:05,400 -I don't show off. -And you do. 563 00:46:06,500 --> 00:46:09,000 -Wait till Tolen sees my bed. -Tolen? 564 00:46:09,200 --> 00:46:10,700 -Yeah, you won't like Tolen. -No. 565 00:46:10,900 --> 00:46:13,400 -I like who I want to like. -Good. You won't like him. 566 00:46:13,600 --> 00:46:16,600 -She might like Tolen or Rory. -Come on. Up. 567 00:46:17,800 --> 00:46:20,300 How can you tell when an elephant's been in the fridge? 568 00:46:20,500 --> 00:46:21,900 He leaves footprints in the butter. 569 00:46:22,100 --> 00:46:23,200 -You knew. -I don't. 570 00:46:23,200 --> 00:46:25,000 -I've heard it before. -Don't show off. 571 00:46:25,100 --> 00:46:26,100 Look! Your end! 572 00:46:26,200 --> 00:46:27,400 -lt'll never go. -lt will. 573 00:46:27,500 --> 00:46:28,900 -I do, sometimes. -Never. 574 00:46:29,000 --> 00:46:30,500 -You're not! -I am! 575 00:46:32,900 --> 00:46:35,600 My leg! I hurt my leg. 576 00:46:41,400 --> 00:46:42,800 She's in there. 577 00:46:43,600 --> 00:46:45,300 I know she's in there. 578 00:46:46,900 --> 00:46:49,800 I recognized your voice. You've got my daughter in there. 579 00:46:50,000 --> 00:46:53,500 I recognize her voice, too. Raves. You havin' raves? 580 00:46:53,600 --> 00:46:56,400 -Has it become one long rave? -I won't say any more. 581 00:46:56,600 --> 00:46:58,300 Just get your clothes on. 582 00:46:58,400 --> 00:47:00,900 I've just.... I don't live here. 583 00:47:01,200 --> 00:47:02,600 -You're the one. -The one? 584 00:47:02,600 --> 00:47:03,600 She's in there. 585 00:47:03,800 --> 00:47:05,800 -Did you want someone? -With Rory McBryde. 586 00:47:06,000 --> 00:47:07,000 Does he live here? 587 00:47:07,000 --> 00:47:08,300 -What, you don't live here? -No. 588 00:47:08,500 --> 00:47:10,600 -All right for my daughter. -Does she live here? 589 00:47:10,700 --> 00:47:14,300 -You trying to be funny? -No. I don't live here. Shall I get them? 590 00:47:14,500 --> 00:47:17,900 -She's never out of there. -ls it a friend? 'Cause the door's blocked. 591 00:47:18,200 --> 00:47:20,700 You first introduced her to the hemp from the Orient. 592 00:47:20,900 --> 00:47:23,000 -Me? -She comes home full of it. 593 00:47:23,100 --> 00:47:26,000 -Shall I get them? -With Rory McBryde. 594 00:47:26,800 --> 00:47:28,600 -Tolen? -Tolen? 595 00:47:30,500 --> 00:47:34,400 Dear. You're right. Wrong bloke. 596 00:47:34,600 --> 00:47:36,300 I can't keep track. 597 00:47:37,600 --> 00:47:39,800 -Well, you're not them. -No. 598 00:47:39,900 --> 00:47:41,600 I don't think so. I don't know him. 599 00:47:41,800 --> 00:47:44,800 Whatever you do, don't let them force you to submit to the hemp. 600 00:47:45,300 --> 00:47:47,200 -Good afternoon. -Right, then, Mr. Hemp. 601 00:47:47,200 --> 00:47:50,700 We were just a-chatting about you. Cold enough for you? 602 00:47:51,400 --> 00:47:55,300 They don't like that, you know. They must hear that 20 times a day. 603 00:47:55,800 --> 00:48:00,000 If you do see my daughter, you tell her Rory's got a bigger bed. 604 00:48:26,400 --> 00:48:27,900 Where's Colin? 605 00:48:34,000 --> 00:48:35,200 Look out! 606 00:48:49,200 --> 00:48:50,700 -That hall. -My leg. 607 00:48:50,800 --> 00:48:52,300 That bloody hall! 608 00:48:54,300 --> 00:48:57,400 -Look. I've hurt my leg. -I can't get up to my room. 609 00:48:57,600 --> 00:48:58,900 I can't get in the front door. 610 00:48:59,100 --> 00:49:01,600 -What about my leg? -I don't care about your leg. 611 00:49:01,700 --> 00:49:03,400 What about access? 612 00:49:05,100 --> 00:49:09,800 -You can have that. You can have access. -Just got to do a bit of climbing, that's all. 613 00:49:10,100 --> 00:49:13,300 Should be a sparkle, see your girlfriends climbing over that. 614 00:49:13,500 --> 00:49:16,000 I told you about that mess in the hall, didn't l? 615 00:49:16,200 --> 00:49:19,400 The thing is, you don't impress me. 616 00:49:21,000 --> 00:49:21,900 That mess. 617 00:49:22,000 --> 00:49:23,900 -What mess? -You made a mess.... 618 00:49:24,200 --> 00:49:25,100 -Jack? -No. 619 00:49:25,300 --> 00:49:27,800 -I mean that bloody bed. -Don't swear. 620 00:49:28,000 --> 00:49:31,000 -Just come off the boat, have you? -See Colin about the mess. 621 00:49:31,200 --> 00:49:33,800 It's his house, mate. It's not yours. 622 00:49:41,200 --> 00:49:43,600 Now, Colin. Tell him I want access. 623 00:49:50,700 --> 00:49:52,600 -Lions. -Lions. 624 00:49:52,800 --> 00:49:54,400 -Lions. -Must you be so childish? 625 00:49:54,600 --> 00:49:55,700 -What? -Colin! 626 00:49:55,800 --> 00:49:58,100 Want to know how they train lions to stand on boxes? 627 00:49:58,200 --> 00:50:00,800 -Access, Colin. -I'll tell you how they train them. 628 00:50:00,900 --> 00:50:03,700 Now first, you must have a box. This bucket. 629 00:50:03,800 --> 00:50:07,300 Look. Now, imagine that this is the limit of the cage... 630 00:50:08,200 --> 00:50:09,200 ...the bars. 631 00:50:09,300 --> 00:50:11,500 -Must you be so childish? -Childlike. 632 00:50:11,700 --> 00:50:14,500 Now, the trainer takes his whip. Whip. Whip. 633 00:50:14,800 --> 00:50:18,100 No. We'll do without a whip. A lion. Must have a lion. 634 00:50:18,300 --> 00:50:22,600 Who'll be a lion? Anyone. Anyway, he takes the box in his left hand... 635 00:50:22,900 --> 00:50:25,100 ...and the whip, imagine the whip, in his right. 636 00:50:25,300 --> 00:50:29,300 And he advances on the lion. And he drives, "Back! Back! Back!" 637 00:50:29,600 --> 00:50:30,900 To the bars. 638 00:50:31,100 --> 00:50:35,200 This is a critical moment, when the lion realizes... 639 00:50:35,400 --> 00:50:39,300 ...that he must leap at his attacker. Otherwise, it'll be too late. 640 00:50:39,600 --> 00:50:43,000 The trainer recognizes the critical moment. 641 00:50:43,300 --> 00:50:47,000 So at the moment the lion rears to attack, the trainer draws back... 642 00:50:47,200 --> 00:50:50,200 ...and the lion, no longer threatened, drops his forepaws... 643 00:50:50,500 --> 00:50:52,800 ...and finds himself standing on the box. 644 00:50:52,800 --> 00:50:55,700 Do this a few times, you've trained a lion to stand on a box. 645 00:50:56,000 --> 00:50:57,600 Colin. 646 00:50:58,100 --> 00:51:00,000 How did the box get there? 647 00:51:00,400 --> 00:51:03,300 -You've still got it in your hand. -The trainer puts it there. 648 00:51:03,500 --> 00:51:06,700 -When? -Look. Here, look. I'll be a lion. 649 00:51:09,700 --> 00:51:12,100 -Makes you feel sexy. -I'll be a lion. 650 00:51:12,200 --> 00:51:13,800 -All right. -And me. 651 00:51:15,000 --> 00:51:17,500 If I roared into something, it'd make more resonance. 652 00:51:18,000 --> 00:51:20,200 Look, that's the lion's box. 653 00:51:21,500 --> 00:51:23,000 This, then. 654 00:51:25,000 --> 00:51:27,500 -You can't have that. -It's all right. 655 00:51:31,000 --> 00:51:33,700 -Yeah, yeah! -Roar! 656 00:51:33,800 --> 00:51:36,300 You should wear a carrier bag more often. 657 00:51:41,600 --> 00:51:44,800 You're exciting him. Don't you realize he's a desperate man? 658 00:51:47,500 --> 00:51:49,000 Just a minute. 659 00:51:51,700 --> 00:51:54,200 -I'll be trainer, then, shall l? -All right. 660 00:51:56,100 --> 00:51:57,400 All right, ready? 661 00:51:59,100 --> 00:52:01,700 Back! Come on! Back! 662 00:52:45,400 --> 00:52:48,300 Just think what you could do with a real whip. 663 00:52:48,400 --> 00:52:49,800 A real whip. 664 00:53:09,700 --> 00:53:13,200 Some tea. Some tea you've indicated. 665 00:53:35,000 --> 00:53:36,600 I hurt my head. 666 00:53:37,400 --> 00:53:39,200 Put it through the wall. 667 00:53:40,200 --> 00:53:41,300 Colin? 668 00:53:45,300 --> 00:53:46,500 Come on. 669 00:53:50,300 --> 00:53:52,300 -Come on. -Kettle's boiling. 670 00:53:53,800 --> 00:53:58,300 Colin, throw that carrier bag away. Away! 671 00:53:59,500 --> 00:54:01,500 Shall we get the bed straight? 672 00:54:04,700 --> 00:54:07,100 The YWCA, that's where? 673 00:54:07,300 --> 00:54:09,700 -Where is it? -Address? 674 00:54:09,900 --> 00:54:12,000 Martin's Grove, West 2. 675 00:54:12,300 --> 00:54:13,700 Where's that? 676 00:54:14,100 --> 00:54:15,900 I'll get the map. 677 00:54:16,500 --> 00:54:19,100 -Thanks. -That's all right. 678 00:54:19,500 --> 00:54:21,700 -Thanks. -Don't mention it. 679 00:54:23,800 --> 00:54:25,500 I'll get you some tea. 680 00:54:28,100 --> 00:54:29,900 You've got Chinese eyebrows. 681 00:54:31,200 --> 00:54:34,800 Chinese eyebrows. Very clear arch, very delicate. 682 00:54:35,400 --> 00:54:37,900 -Have l? -Have you got a mirror? I'll show you. 683 00:54:38,300 --> 00:54:40,900 -What's your name? -Nancy. 684 00:54:41,300 --> 00:54:44,300 -Nancy Jones. What's yours? -Tolen. 685 00:54:44,800 --> 00:54:47,200 Tolen? Tolen what? 686 00:54:48,300 --> 00:54:50,800 Tolen. 687 00:54:51,500 --> 00:54:53,400 I see, like Mantovani. 688 00:54:53,700 --> 00:54:56,200 -Pardon? -Like Mantovani. 689 00:54:56,400 --> 00:54:58,400 Nothing Mantovani, Mantovani nothing. 690 00:54:58,600 --> 00:55:01,400 -Would you tell me what you mean? -Have you not heard of him? 691 00:55:01,600 --> 00:55:03,800 He's a conductor. He conducts. 692 00:55:04,300 --> 00:55:06,800 -ls it your surname or your Christian name? -Surname. 693 00:55:07,000 --> 00:55:09,300 -What's your Christian name? -I prefer not to use it. 694 00:55:09,400 --> 00:55:10,500 Why? 695 00:55:11,000 --> 00:55:14,700 I don't use it. I have no first name. I never use my first name. 696 00:55:15,300 --> 00:55:18,600 What's the matter? Is there anything the matter with you? 697 00:55:18,800 --> 00:55:19,800 No. 698 00:55:20,000 --> 00:55:22,000 -Why are you so nervous? -I'm not. 699 00:55:22,200 --> 00:55:23,700 You look nervous. 700 00:55:24,000 --> 00:55:25,600 Me, nervous? 701 00:55:26,400 --> 00:55:28,400 -Do l? -Yeah. 702 00:55:28,500 --> 00:55:30,000 -Yeah? -Nothing. 703 00:55:30,200 --> 00:55:32,600 -What's the matter? -It's-- 704 00:55:32,700 --> 00:55:34,400 -Well? -It's-- 705 00:55:34,600 --> 00:55:37,500 You are nervous, aren't you? Very nervous. 706 00:55:38,200 --> 00:55:41,200 -Why don't you take your coat off? -I don't want to. 707 00:55:41,500 --> 00:55:44,600 -My dear, you will take it off. -I don't want to. 708 00:55:44,700 --> 00:55:46,700 -Why don't you want to? -It's-- 709 00:55:46,900 --> 00:55:49,100 -Yes? -You're looking at me. 710 00:55:49,200 --> 00:55:50,500 -Am l? -Yeah. 711 00:55:50,700 --> 00:55:52,100 -How am I looking? -I don't know. 712 00:55:52,200 --> 00:55:53,400 How am I looking? 713 00:55:53,600 --> 00:55:54,700 -Yes? -What l-- 714 00:55:54,700 --> 00:55:56,400 -What? -I don't know. 715 00:55:56,600 --> 00:55:58,000 -What? -I feel-- 716 00:55:59,000 --> 00:56:00,200 You feel funny. 717 00:56:00,400 --> 00:56:03,900 Don't you? Go on, tell me. Go on, tell me. 718 00:56:04,100 --> 00:56:07,000 Don't you think you'd better find a Catholic girls' refuge? 719 00:56:07,100 --> 00:56:08,300 I'm not a Catholic. 720 00:56:08,500 --> 00:56:11,400 You'll find the address in any ladies' lav, any railway station. 721 00:56:11,500 --> 00:56:12,900 How do you know? 722 00:56:13,000 --> 00:56:16,500 There was a little piggy before there was an elephant. That's true. 723 00:56:16,700 --> 00:56:20,100 And this little piggy had two great big front teeth that stuck out. 724 00:56:20,400 --> 00:56:23,000 However, there are certain advantages in being big. 725 00:56:23,200 --> 00:56:25,700 You can eat off trees and things, like horses. 726 00:56:25,900 --> 00:56:28,900 -For you, this is remarkably incoherent. -Really? Thanks. 727 00:56:29,000 --> 00:56:32,600 This creature got big, and it grew an enormous, great long jaw. 728 00:56:32,900 --> 00:56:34,800 So that it could scoop up vegetation. 729 00:56:34,900 --> 00:56:37,500 An enormous jaw, seven-foot-long, you can imagine. 730 00:56:37,600 --> 00:56:38,700 As big as a door. 731 00:56:38,800 --> 00:56:42,500 Now, a seven-foot jaw involves certain difficulties... 732 00:56:42,800 --> 00:56:45,600 ...in getting the food from the front of the jaw to the back. 733 00:56:45,800 --> 00:56:48,900 It had to use its upper lip to shovel the garbage along. 734 00:56:49,300 --> 00:56:52,300 -You watching, Colin? -The upper lip began to grow. 735 00:56:52,400 --> 00:56:54,600 It grew so big it began to do all the work... 736 00:56:54,800 --> 00:56:57,100 ...and the creature didn't bother about the jaw. 737 00:56:57,300 --> 00:56:58,500 As you know-- 738 00:56:58,600 --> 00:57:00,600 -Why don't you look at me? -I can't. 739 00:57:00,700 --> 00:57:02,200 -As you know-- -Why can't you? 740 00:57:02,800 --> 00:57:03,800 What? 741 00:57:03,900 --> 00:57:07,100 As you know, any organ not in constant use atrophies. 742 00:57:07,300 --> 00:57:10,600 The jaw began to shrivel and shrivel, and.... 743 00:57:10,900 --> 00:57:12,400 And so, drop off. 744 00:57:13,100 --> 00:57:15,800 Not that you need worry about anything like that. 745 00:57:15,900 --> 00:57:17,400 Come on, why? 746 00:57:18,700 --> 00:57:20,300 -Why, then? -I'll laugh! 747 00:57:20,300 --> 00:57:21,800 -Why? -You'll make me laugh. 748 00:57:22,000 --> 00:57:23,100 -Why? -You will. 749 00:57:23,200 --> 00:57:24,500 -Will l? -Yeah. 750 00:57:24,700 --> 00:57:26,500 Come on, then. Look at me. 751 00:57:26,700 --> 00:57:29,100 Look at me. 752 00:57:29,300 --> 00:57:33,100 Laugh, look at me, laugh, look at me. Laugh, laugh, laugh. 753 00:57:34,200 --> 00:57:36,300 All right, Colin, she's all yours. 754 00:57:37,600 --> 00:57:39,900 -What? -You have a try. 755 00:57:40,100 --> 00:57:41,700 -Me? -Yes. 756 00:57:55,500 --> 00:57:57,600 Has Cardiff got big docks? 757 00:57:58,100 --> 00:58:01,400 -What? -Has Cardiff got big docks? 758 00:58:01,500 --> 00:58:02,600 -What? -Welsh. 759 00:58:02,800 --> 00:58:04,000 -Welsh? -Aren't you? 760 00:58:04,100 --> 00:58:07,900 -Where did you say the YWCA was? -Wales? 761 00:58:08,200 --> 00:58:09,200 It was the name, "Jones." 762 00:58:09,300 --> 00:58:10,300 Is it far? 763 00:58:10,500 --> 00:58:11,800 -Pardon? -ls it far? 764 00:58:11,800 --> 00:58:13,000 No, no, not very. 765 00:58:13,200 --> 00:58:15,500 -27 bus. -I'm off. 766 00:58:15,600 --> 00:58:20,200 And as for you, Mr. "only-one-name," Mr. " no-name," as for you.... 767 00:58:22,700 --> 00:58:26,500 -My Honey. Give me my Honey. -You want your magazine? 768 00:58:41,900 --> 00:58:44,300 -You see, it's not difficult. -That's it! 769 00:58:44,500 --> 00:58:47,400 I need this room, Tolen. Stay out of this room! 770 00:58:47,600 --> 00:58:50,000 -The bed. Shift the bed. -Shift it yourself! 771 00:58:50,200 --> 00:58:51,200 We'll shift it. 772 00:58:51,300 --> 00:58:52,900 -You'll shift it! -Please! 773 00:58:53,000 --> 00:58:55,700 All right, the best place for it is outside Tolen's room. 774 00:58:55,900 --> 00:58:58,800 -No, please, I want it in my room. -He wants it shifted! 775 00:58:59,100 --> 00:59:03,400 -What am I gonna sleep on, the stairs? -Why have you got such a big bed? 776 00:59:04,100 --> 00:59:05,300 Because. 777 00:59:07,400 --> 00:59:10,300 I want another one, that's why. I wanted another one. 778 00:59:10,400 --> 00:59:12,400 A bigger one. You know. 779 00:59:13,200 --> 00:59:16,400 Because it's more comfortable. And it's just in case. 780 00:59:17,200 --> 00:59:20,700 And to me, it is very important that I can always put up my married cousins. 781 00:59:21,000 --> 00:59:22,500 Come on, then. 782 00:59:39,500 --> 00:59:41,100 No one's going to rape you. 783 00:59:42,700 --> 00:59:45,500 No. Girls don't get raped unless they want it. 784 00:59:45,700 --> 00:59:46,900 Want it? 785 00:59:47,400 --> 00:59:51,300 I'm sorry about what happened. It was very clumsy. 786 00:59:52,100 --> 00:59:54,500 -That's right. -lt was because they were here. 787 00:59:54,700 --> 00:59:56,300 The clumsiness, I mean. 788 00:59:56,300 --> 00:59:58,800 -Was it? -ln a way, yes. 789 01:00:00,400 --> 01:00:02,100 Do you believe me? 790 01:00:02,200 --> 01:00:04,200 Please, believe me. 791 01:00:06,000 --> 01:00:08,300 -lt doesn't matter. -lt does matter. 792 01:00:08,500 --> 01:00:10,200 It matters very much. 793 01:00:11,300 --> 01:00:13,200 It matters very much to me. 794 01:00:18,500 --> 01:00:20,100 How sweet you are. 795 01:00:20,700 --> 01:00:23,500 Such a sweet face. Such sweetness. 796 01:00:25,300 --> 01:00:26,700 Come upstairs. 797 01:00:27,800 --> 01:00:28,800 Come. 798 01:00:29,500 --> 01:00:30,600 Come up. 799 01:00:31,100 --> 01:00:32,600 Come upstairs. 800 01:00:36,200 --> 01:00:38,400 -Where is he? -Who? 801 01:00:38,600 --> 01:00:39,700 Tolen. 802 01:00:42,200 --> 01:00:44,300 I've got some records upstairs. 803 01:00:44,500 --> 01:00:47,900 You'll like Thelonious, he's very deep. Very satisfying. 804 01:00:48,200 --> 01:00:49,600 You'll like his music. 805 01:00:50,100 --> 01:00:53,500 -I'll play you some of his records upstairs. -Not in my house. 806 01:00:53,700 --> 01:00:55,300 -What? -I'll come, too. 807 01:00:55,300 --> 01:00:56,700 -You will? -I'll come. 808 01:00:56,900 --> 01:00:57,800 -Where? -To find it. 809 01:00:57,900 --> 01:00:58,900 -What? -The YW. 810 01:00:59,100 --> 01:01:02,200 Why don't you go and look for the YWCA? 811 01:01:02,400 --> 01:01:04,200 -You're coming, aren't you? -Well.... 812 01:01:04,400 --> 01:01:05,900 -Come on. -What about the cases? 813 01:01:06,100 --> 01:01:07,400 -Cases? -I can't go without them. 814 01:01:07,500 --> 01:01:08,800 -He'll look after 'em. -Who will? 815 01:01:09,000 --> 01:01:10,000 -He will. -Me? 816 01:01:10,100 --> 01:01:11,600 -Where are you going? -I'm going out. 817 01:01:11,800 --> 01:01:13,600 -Yes, I'd like a walk. -So would l. 818 01:01:13,700 --> 01:01:14,800 -The cases? -You stay here. 819 01:01:14,900 --> 01:01:15,800 Why should l? 820 01:01:16,000 --> 01:01:17,000 -You could stay here. -Why? 821 01:01:17,000 --> 01:01:18,300 Who'd look after the cases? 822 01:01:18,500 --> 01:01:19,400 -He can. -Who can? 823 01:01:19,500 --> 01:01:21,900 -Tom can. -He's got his painting to do. 824 01:01:22,100 --> 01:01:24,900 -Can't they just stay here? -No, I need them at the YW. 825 01:01:25,200 --> 01:01:26,700 There's no YW up there. 826 01:01:26,800 --> 01:01:29,600 I'm not having my house turned into a common boarding house. 827 01:01:29,700 --> 01:01:32,100 You don't know what you're coming to, striding forth. 828 01:01:32,300 --> 01:01:33,500 That's it. The thing is-- 829 01:01:33,600 --> 01:01:36,500 Get those walls clean. A nice dusty brown throughout. 830 01:01:36,600 --> 01:01:39,500 -And there's no mixing on the stairs. -Are you coming? 831 01:01:42,100 --> 01:01:44,400 -To the YW? -Can't just you and me go? 832 01:01:44,600 --> 01:01:45,500 -Well-- -Well? 833 01:01:45,600 --> 01:01:46,800 I don't think I really-- 834 01:01:46,900 --> 01:01:48,100 -You said you did. -Did l? 835 01:01:48,200 --> 01:01:50,000 -What about the cases? -Why don't you go? 836 01:01:50,200 --> 01:01:52,300 -Me? -lf you're going, why don't you go? 837 01:01:52,500 --> 01:01:54,500 -Let's go for a walk. -What about the cases? 838 01:01:54,700 --> 01:01:56,200 -Why don't you carry them? -Her? 839 01:01:56,300 --> 01:01:57,800 -Yeah. -She can't carry them. 840 01:01:58,000 --> 01:02:00,500 -She's already carried them here. -She can't carry them! 841 01:02:00,600 --> 01:02:01,700 Why don't you carry them? 842 01:02:01,800 --> 01:02:03,600 -I want both hands free. -Smooth, dear. 843 01:02:03,700 --> 01:02:05,600 -Where are you going? -Anywhere. 844 01:02:05,800 --> 01:02:07,300 -Do you want to? -Do you want me to? 845 01:02:07,500 --> 01:02:08,800 If you want to, yeah. 846 01:02:09,600 --> 01:02:11,300 -Are you going to the YW? -Maybe. 847 01:02:11,500 --> 01:02:13,600 -Can I come, too? -What about the cases? 848 01:02:13,800 --> 01:02:15,100 What? 849 01:02:15,100 --> 01:02:18,200 Stay with them, Colin. Stick with them! 850 01:02:19,300 --> 01:02:22,300 -How does Tolen do it? -He hasn't, has he, yet? 851 01:02:22,500 --> 01:02:23,500 -What? -Done it. 852 01:02:23,700 --> 01:02:24,900 Come on. 853 01:02:26,400 --> 01:02:29,400 -The cases. Come on! -I'm coming. 854 01:02:37,300 --> 01:02:40,300 Come back! This is bound to end in tears! 855 01:02:40,600 --> 01:02:42,500 Come back here! 856 01:06:29,400 --> 01:06:33,800 Stop it. You're touching me. Keep off. 857 01:07:02,500 --> 01:07:05,200 Keep off. Do you hear? 858 01:07:05,800 --> 01:07:07,100 Don't touch me. 859 01:07:08,200 --> 01:07:09,400 All right? 860 01:07:12,800 --> 01:07:15,300 Now. Now, then. 861 01:07:16,700 --> 01:07:19,900 What is it? What do you want from me? 862 01:07:20,700 --> 01:07:23,900 What you tryin' on? What you trying to do? 863 01:07:25,600 --> 01:07:29,000 Smarty mister. You smart, Mr. Smarty? You think.... 864 01:07:29,500 --> 01:07:32,400 You think you're all right. You think you're pretty clever. 865 01:07:32,600 --> 01:07:35,400 You do, don't you, Mr. Smarty, tight trousers? 866 01:07:35,600 --> 01:07:39,300 Mr. Tight Trousers. Mr. Narrow Slacks. You think you're the kit, the cat's. 867 01:07:39,700 --> 01:07:41,300 I'll show you, Mr. Tight Trousers. 868 01:07:41,700 --> 01:07:44,100 Just you don't better come near me, do you hear? 869 01:07:44,500 --> 01:07:48,900 Just you don't better come near me. Just you, well, come near me.... 870 01:07:49,300 --> 01:07:54,100 Mr. Tight Slacks. Mister.... Come near me. Come near me. 871 01:07:54,600 --> 01:07:56,700 Come near me! Come! Come! 872 01:08:22,800 --> 01:08:24,900 -Did she-- -I never touched her, did l? 873 01:08:25,000 --> 01:08:27,400 -I knew it'd end like this. -You know I don't need.... 874 01:08:27,600 --> 01:08:30,300 -How many women have I got? -Didn't think you'd go this far. 875 01:08:30,500 --> 01:08:31,400 Surprising. 876 01:08:31,500 --> 01:08:33,200 -Well, is she dead? -Dead? 877 01:08:33,300 --> 01:08:35,300 -She's not. -It's been my constant fear. 878 01:08:35,500 --> 01:08:37,400 -I knew this would happen one day. -She's not. 879 01:08:37,600 --> 01:08:40,400 Why not relax, know what I mean? You're so carried away. 880 01:08:40,600 --> 01:08:42,000 -Feather. -You know how it is. 881 01:08:42,200 --> 01:08:44,000 -She's not. -It's happened. 882 01:08:44,300 --> 01:08:46,500 -Did you touch her neck at all? -No, not round, no. 883 01:08:46,700 --> 01:08:49,000 See if there are marks of violence around the neck. 884 01:08:49,200 --> 01:08:50,200 I have this fatal knack. 885 01:08:50,300 --> 01:08:51,900 -Me? -Contusions. 886 01:08:52,100 --> 01:08:53,000 Me? 887 01:08:55,900 --> 01:08:57,700 I don't like that sort of thing. 888 01:08:58,300 --> 01:08:59,900 -Breathing. -Warm was she? 889 01:09:00,000 --> 01:09:00,900 That's right. 890 01:09:01,000 --> 01:09:02,400 -Was she breathing? -I don't know. 891 01:09:02,600 --> 01:09:04,000 At least she's decent now. 892 01:09:04,100 --> 01:09:06,100 -Wasn't she decent before? -That kind of girl? 893 01:09:06,300 --> 01:09:09,100 -The pulse is the thing. -Have you had dealings with the pulse? 894 01:09:09,300 --> 01:09:10,900 -She was disgusting. -Kiss of life. 895 01:09:11,100 --> 01:09:12,100 She'd enjoy that. 896 01:09:12,100 --> 01:09:13,100 -You. -Me? 897 01:09:13,200 --> 01:09:16,400 -Feel her pulse. You attacked her. -I did not. Did l? 898 01:09:16,900 --> 01:09:18,700 -I didn't, did l? -I didn't, did l? 899 01:09:18,900 --> 01:09:22,000 I haven't got the knack to make a girl lie on her back in the rain. 900 01:09:22,200 --> 01:09:23,100 It's not raining. 901 01:09:23,300 --> 01:09:25,300 The same thing happened to a friend of mine... 902 01:09:25,400 --> 01:09:26,600 ...in Chatham Royal Naval Yard. 903 01:09:26,800 --> 01:09:28,500 Both were wafted away in an ambulance. 904 01:09:28,700 --> 01:09:30,000 -Both? -You didn't go, Tolen. 905 01:09:30,100 --> 01:09:32,000 Not me. It'd take more than that. 906 01:09:32,200 --> 01:09:34,200 No, he flaked out. He was in the navy. 907 01:09:34,400 --> 01:09:35,900 -Both of them were. -She's not dead. 908 01:09:36,100 --> 01:09:37,500 Hold it under her nose. 909 01:09:38,600 --> 01:09:40,600 Pulse. I can't find a thing. 910 01:09:41,000 --> 01:09:43,000 Have they got it in the same place as us? 911 01:09:43,400 --> 01:09:45,200 -Feather? -Perfect. Yes. 912 01:09:45,300 --> 01:09:47,000 -Feel her heart. -You feel it. 913 01:09:47,100 --> 01:09:48,500 I'll not feel her heart. 914 01:09:48,700 --> 01:09:50,300 -Tolen! -Feather, yes. 915 01:09:56,000 --> 01:09:58,100 -She's still warm. -Doesn't mean a thing. 916 01:09:58,300 --> 01:10:01,000 -She's not. -She would be, wouldn't she? Warm. 917 01:10:14,700 --> 01:10:15,800 I've been raped. 918 01:10:17,500 --> 01:10:18,400 Raped. 919 01:10:22,800 --> 01:10:25,600 -Raped. -Good. She's all right. 920 01:10:25,800 --> 01:10:28,800 -Raped. -You see? You see what happens? 921 01:10:29,300 --> 01:10:31,800 I didn't, you know. I did not rape that girl. 922 01:10:32,000 --> 01:10:34,400 -I mean, me? I ask you, now, is it likely? -Raped. 923 01:10:34,500 --> 01:10:37,000 -I've had 'em in queues. You've seen. -Raped. 924 01:10:37,200 --> 01:10:40,400 -Flash birds in all manner of rousy gear. -Rape! 925 01:10:40,600 --> 01:10:44,100 Lock her up. That's my reaction, because she can get into trouble. 926 01:10:44,300 --> 01:10:46,400 -Not me. -A cup of tea. Hot, sweet tea. 927 01:10:46,600 --> 01:10:49,600 Soon forget her rape nonsense, and you can get the knack again. 928 01:10:49,700 --> 01:10:52,600 -Rape. -You don't know the fears. 929 01:10:52,800 --> 01:10:56,200 -It's been my life's fear. -Get a gag on her and lock her up. 930 01:10:57,300 --> 01:10:59,000 My bike. My bleeding tires! 931 01:10:59,200 --> 01:11:01,600 -She must be stopped. -That'll have to be pushed. 932 01:11:01,800 --> 01:11:04,200 -They'll be ruined, those tires. -Stop her. 933 01:11:05,300 --> 01:11:06,700 Rape. 934 01:11:06,800 --> 01:11:08,700 Now, listen, let's talk about this bike. 935 01:11:08,900 --> 01:11:09,800 Rape. 936 01:11:11,000 --> 01:11:12,800 -Get out. -Let me have a word. 937 01:11:13,300 --> 01:11:17,800 -Hand. Get.... Good. Back, back. -Over the.... Hold on, hold on. 938 01:11:19,700 --> 01:11:22,500 -They're almost human, aren't they? -They're very good. 939 01:11:22,800 --> 01:11:25,000 I hear they're all doped to make them perform. 940 01:11:25,400 --> 01:11:28,900 -Look at the lovely bears. -They do look so funny. 941 01:11:29,100 --> 01:11:30,200 They don't. 942 01:11:30,700 --> 01:11:32,100 Don't leave me. 943 01:11:37,700 --> 01:11:38,900 Ra.... 944 01:11:43,900 --> 01:11:45,400 Just tidying up the park. 945 01:11:51,800 --> 01:11:53,000 Rape. 946 01:12:16,300 --> 01:12:18,600 -Rape. -Not today, thank you. 947 01:12:22,300 --> 01:12:24,300 -Rape. -There she is. 948 01:12:27,100 --> 01:12:29,600 Rape. 949 01:12:30,100 --> 01:12:32,900 Faster. The four-minute mile. Get it down to four minutes. 950 01:12:33,100 --> 01:12:34,200 Rape. 951 01:12:36,700 --> 01:12:38,800 -Rape. -My God, my records. 952 01:12:39,000 --> 01:12:42,400 She's breaking your records. The thing is, you must take it like a man. 953 01:12:42,600 --> 01:12:44,300 Not Thelonious. 954 01:12:45,600 --> 01:12:47,800 Listen. She's stopped. 955 01:12:47,900 --> 01:12:51,100 Now, let's look at this objectively. Some tea. 956 01:12:51,900 --> 01:12:54,700 You'll feel better after a nice cup of tea, I'm sure. 957 01:12:54,800 --> 01:12:58,500 I can hear you. Plotting who's next on the job, aren't you? 958 01:12:58,900 --> 01:13:00,400 I'll get the tea on. 959 01:13:00,600 --> 01:13:01,600 -Now, then. -Rape. 960 01:13:01,600 --> 01:13:02,700 -My dear girl. -Rape! 961 01:13:02,700 --> 01:13:04,500 -This all-- -Rape! 962 01:13:04,700 --> 01:13:06,000 -This is all-- -Rape. 963 01:13:06,100 --> 01:13:09,000 -A fantasy. -This is all a fantasy. 964 01:13:10,900 --> 01:13:11,900 Rape. 965 01:13:13,900 --> 01:13:16,400 -Starkers. Bare buff. -Let me see. 966 01:13:16,600 --> 01:13:18,300 -Get back. -Fantasy. 967 01:13:18,900 --> 01:13:22,000 -She was never raped. -10 years, and I'll sue you for paternity. 968 01:13:22,200 --> 01:13:26,300 -The tea, the tea. -Get in there and rape her. 969 01:13:26,600 --> 01:13:28,100 She's got nothing on. 970 01:13:28,300 --> 01:13:29,700 -Me? -Right, go on, Tolen. 971 01:13:30,000 --> 01:13:32,600 She wants you to rape her. That's what it's all about. 972 01:13:32,800 --> 01:13:35,500 So go in there, help her out of her little fantasy... 973 01:13:35,700 --> 01:13:37,100 ...and all will be well. 974 01:13:37,300 --> 01:13:39,000 -But why me? -It's your room. 975 01:13:39,100 --> 01:13:40,700 And you have got the knack. 976 01:13:40,900 --> 01:13:43,300 -I used to have. -Satisfy her. 977 01:13:43,500 --> 01:13:46,800 She wants raping, so go in there and rape her. 978 01:13:47,000 --> 01:13:48,800 I'm not being done twice. 979 01:13:48,800 --> 01:13:52,800 She must be examined now by a confident, competent physician... 980 01:13:53,000 --> 01:13:54,700 ...now, before she gets raped. 981 01:13:54,900 --> 01:13:57,200 These persons have raped me. 982 01:13:58,500 --> 01:14:02,200 -How do we know? -You, yeah, before we arrived. 983 01:14:02,500 --> 01:14:04,700 You don't believe that, do you? 984 01:14:04,900 --> 01:14:08,500 Very nasty situation here. Dear me. Yes, very nasty. 985 01:14:08,800 --> 01:14:11,500 Particularly vicious and so criminal. 986 01:14:11,600 --> 01:14:14,800 Yes, that's it. Positively criminal. They ought to be told. 987 01:14:15,000 --> 01:14:16,500 Somebody should. I shall phone 'em. 988 01:14:16,700 --> 01:14:19,400 The police, Scotland Yard. Whitehall, one-two-one-two. 989 01:14:19,600 --> 01:14:21,300 Rape, rape, rape, rape. 990 01:14:22,500 --> 01:14:23,600 Come on, Tolen. 991 01:14:23,800 --> 01:14:25,900 -Why don't you, then? -lndeed, I can't. 992 01:14:26,100 --> 01:14:28,300 I've got this bone in me leg. 993 01:14:28,500 --> 01:14:30,400 No, I'd love to help you, but-- 994 01:14:30,500 --> 01:14:33,000 Here, what day is this? It went clean out of my head. 995 01:14:33,300 --> 01:14:35,000 I can't get involved raping girls today. 996 01:14:35,100 --> 01:14:37,700 December 8, Albert Hall. I want my suit. 997 01:14:37,800 --> 01:14:40,600 -What? Your suit? -Certainly. The mohair. Excuse me. 998 01:14:40,900 --> 01:14:42,300 Very good. In you go. 999 01:14:42,400 --> 01:14:46,000 And while you're putting it on, you can help with our.... 1000 01:14:48,800 --> 01:14:50,300 Just a minute. 1001 01:14:50,600 --> 01:14:54,500 Listen, my girl. Shut up. Now, then.... 1002 01:14:55,800 --> 01:14:57,200 Just shut up. 1003 01:14:59,400 --> 01:15:01,100 There you are. 1004 01:15:01,200 --> 01:15:04,000 I know you've got nothing on underneath that. Now.... 1005 01:15:04,200 --> 01:15:06,400 You need a firm taste of.... 1006 01:15:06,900 --> 01:15:09,700 You just listen to me. I was there all the time. 1007 01:15:10,000 --> 01:15:12,000 And I saw it all, as a matter of fact. 1008 01:15:12,000 --> 01:15:15,400 I can assure you that you have not been raped, as it were. 1009 01:15:15,700 --> 01:15:17,500 You're bound to say that, aren't you? 1010 01:15:17,700 --> 01:15:20,800 Yes. So you can go home and feel intact. 1011 01:15:21,200 --> 01:15:23,200 -lt was you. -Me? 1012 01:15:23,300 --> 01:15:25,200 -lt was you raped me. -No, no. 1013 01:15:25,400 --> 01:15:29,600 -You're making a terrible mistake. -You'll get 10 years. Clothes. 1014 01:15:29,900 --> 01:15:33,200 -On. There's a good girl. -I'll report you. Clothes. 1015 01:15:33,300 --> 01:15:35,100 -Clothes? -Tore them off me. 1016 01:15:35,200 --> 01:15:37,600 -No. -Where are they, then? 1017 01:15:37,800 --> 01:15:40,100 -Where? -ln your house. 1018 01:15:40,200 --> 01:15:41,400 I can explain. 1019 01:15:42,200 --> 01:15:44,100 No one would ever guess. 1020 01:15:44,800 --> 01:15:47,400 -Lust. -That face. 1021 01:15:47,900 --> 01:15:50,600 -Lust. -Little did his pupils think.... 1022 01:15:50,900 --> 01:15:54,100 -Little did his pupils think,,, -Shut up! 1023 01:15:57,900 --> 01:16:02,400 -And you never can tell, can you? -That face. No girl would ever suspect. 1024 01:16:02,700 --> 01:16:05,300 -No? -But underneath, lust. 1025 01:16:07,100 --> 01:16:08,300 No, never. 1026 01:16:08,500 --> 01:16:11,700 Little did his pupils realize that beneath the handsome exterior... 1027 01:16:11,900 --> 01:16:14,600 ...of their tall, fair-haired, blue-eyed schoolteacher... 1028 01:16:14,800 --> 01:16:16,900 ...there lurked the heart of a beast... 1029 01:16:17,100 --> 01:16:19,800 ...Iusting for the blood of innocent virgins. 1030 01:16:20,000 --> 01:16:23,300 Little did they.... You wait'll you see the Sunday 'zette. 1031 01:16:23,900 --> 01:16:25,400 Have I really? 1032 01:16:25,700 --> 01:16:26,700 What? 1033 01:16:27,600 --> 01:16:29,000 Got a handsome exterior? 1034 01:16:30,900 --> 01:16:32,300 Lovely hands. 1035 01:16:35,700 --> 01:16:37,900 All right, love, feeling better? 1036 01:16:38,300 --> 01:16:41,000 Come round if you feel like it. 1037 01:16:41,500 --> 01:16:46,100 Albert Hall. It's informal. Just a small gathering. A few friends. 1038 01:16:47,400 --> 01:16:50,600 Women friends. Rory McBryde and I have many friends. 1039 01:16:50,900 --> 01:16:53,400 In a manner of speaking, it's a reunion. 1040 01:16:53,600 --> 01:16:57,900 Most of our girlfriends will be there, you know, in the guest book upstairs. 1041 01:16:58,400 --> 01:17:00,600 We needed a large hall. 1042 01:17:01,300 --> 01:17:04,600 Of course, not quite so many as me... 1043 01:17:04,900 --> 01:17:06,500 ...but a few. 1044 01:17:08,900 --> 01:17:12,700 It's a get-together, you see? Feeling better now, then? 1045 01:17:13,200 --> 01:17:15,600 You see. Nobody raped you. 1046 01:17:16,100 --> 01:17:17,600 And.... 1047 01:17:18,100 --> 01:17:20,900 You can get some clothes on, and I'll-- 1048 01:17:21,600 --> 01:17:24,500 Colin did her. Raped her. 1049 01:17:25,900 --> 01:17:26,800 Never. 1050 01:17:28,200 --> 01:17:30,100 He's a sexual incompetent. 1051 01:17:30,300 --> 01:17:31,900 -What's that? -Not good at it. 1052 01:17:32,100 --> 01:17:35,200 No good? Get on. He's marvelous. He raped me. 1053 01:17:35,400 --> 01:17:38,900 Now, then! Now, then, you've not been raped. 1054 01:17:39,300 --> 01:17:41,100 -I have. -Never, no. 1055 01:17:41,300 --> 01:17:42,200 He's rugged. 1056 01:17:44,100 --> 01:17:45,200 And handsome. 1057 01:17:47,200 --> 01:17:48,400 Now.... 1058 01:17:52,900 --> 01:17:54,500 Will you come round? 1059 01:17:55,000 --> 01:17:59,500 Get some.... And come round. Have a drink. 1060 01:17:59,800 --> 01:18:02,400 I'd like you both to meet Rory, if you feel like it. 1061 01:18:03,000 --> 01:18:06,000 -Tom. -And lovely hands. 1062 01:18:06,100 --> 01:18:09,300 -And he raped me marvelous-super. -Now, come on! 1063 01:18:09,400 --> 01:18:10,700 That.... 1064 01:18:11,600 --> 01:18:13,600 Why not? Think I couldn't? 1065 01:18:13,800 --> 01:18:15,200 -Yeah. -Shut up. 1066 01:18:20,200 --> 01:18:23,900 Adieu, I am not incapable. No, no. 1067 01:18:25,800 --> 01:18:29,300 Go on, out. I'll show you. 1068 01:18:30,600 --> 01:18:33,400 I didn't really, but I'd love to. 1069 01:18:34,500 --> 01:18:37,300 -I mean, I did, didn't l? -Yes. 1070 01:18:38,700 --> 01:18:41,300 You don't know one end of a woman from.... 1071 01:18:42,700 --> 01:18:44,700 Could you fill the Albert Hall? 1072 01:19:54,800 --> 01:19:56,300 It's exaggeration. 1073 01:19:56,700 --> 01:20:01,000 I mean, Rory's got these friends, that's all. I've got one or two regular. 1074 01:20:01,300 --> 01:20:02,700 Not as many as Rory, but.... 1075 01:20:11,600 --> 01:20:13,100 Don't you feel tired? 1076 01:20:14,600 --> 01:20:17,600 I mean, after all that rape? 1077 01:20:18,400 --> 01:20:20,600 I feel, you know.... 1078 01:20:21,600 --> 01:20:25,500 -No, how do you feel? -You know, sort of funny. 1079 01:20:32,700 --> 01:20:34,500 -Not nervous? -No. 1080 01:20:39,200 --> 01:20:40,700 -Go on. -What? 1081 01:20:40,800 --> 01:20:43,700 Keep asking me. Ask me what else I feel. 1082 01:20:49,900 --> 01:20:51,800 -Look at me. -Yes? 1083 01:20:54,200 --> 01:20:57,100 -You make me laugh. -And me. 1084 01:20:57,800 --> 01:20:59,400 Tom, excuse me. 1085 01:21:01,700 --> 01:21:04,300 -Colin? -Upstairs. 1086 01:21:07,300 --> 01:21:08,700 Is she moving in? 1087 01:21:09,300 --> 01:21:12,000 -I imagine so. -I see. 1088 01:21:13,300 --> 01:21:14,300 Yes. 1089 01:21:19,600 --> 01:21:22,100 Do you approve of that sort of thing? 1090 01:21:32,900 --> 01:21:34,300 Laugh, then. 1091 01:21:34,800 --> 01:21:35,900 Laugh? 1092 01:21:36,700 --> 01:21:38,000 Yes, laugh. 1093 01:21:39,300 --> 01:21:40,400 Go on. 1094 01:21:42,400 --> 01:21:44,800 It would be lovely to see you laugh. 1095 01:21:52,600 --> 01:21:55,300 There's a time and place for everything. 1096 01:21:55,500 --> 01:21:58,300 That's what I always say, and I always keep my place. 1097 01:21:58,500 --> 01:22:01,800 This is neither the time nor the place. Mods and rockers. 1098 01:22:02,000 --> 01:22:04,500 I've kept my eyes open on that washing line. 1099 01:22:04,800 --> 01:22:07,600 And it's not all what you'd expect three lads to wear... 1100 01:22:07,700 --> 01:22:10,300 ...which makes suspicious reading, to my way of thinking. 1101 01:22:10,500 --> 01:22:12,400 -She's moving in. -I'm bound. 1102 01:22:12,600 --> 01:22:15,600 -Got the whole idea from television. -Very bound. 1103 01:22:16,100 --> 01:22:18,800 He's living with her. I mean, she's moving in. 1104 01:22:18,900 --> 01:22:22,100 And not married, either. They're living together.... 85356

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