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In my younger and
more vulnerable years,
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my father gave me some advice.
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00:00:10,130 --> 00:00:12,317
He said, "The laziest
way to tell a story
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00:00:12,380 --> 00:00:15,145
is through voice-over narration."
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00:00:15,185 --> 00:00:18,286
With that in mind, I tell the
tale of the tragic collision
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00:00:18,322 --> 00:00:20,688
between the last tycoon of the Jazz Age
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00:00:20,724 --> 00:00:24,125
and the king of a hip-hop empire.
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00:00:24,160 --> 00:00:25,326
It began with an old man
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feeling like his best
years had passed him by.
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00:00:29,865 --> 00:00:31,165
You seem glum, sir.
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How about a blood transfusion?
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We have some new small batch,
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single donor plasmas.
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Mmm. Better make it a double.
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My life used to be so lively,
so full of excitement.
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♪ Monty! ♪
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Such shindigs I threw
at my summer estate.
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00:00:48,683 --> 00:00:51,017
In an age of shameful excess,
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00:00:51,053 --> 00:00:54,354
my parties were legendary for
their magnificent excess.
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00:00:54,389 --> 00:00:56,956
Fortunes were won and lost at my tables.
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Affairs were launched on my dance floor
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and consummated on my floor-floor.
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00:01:01,195 --> 00:01:04,196
Sultans mingled with Sultans of Swat.
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♪ Monty! ♪
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And presiding over it all was me,
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00:01:09,836 --> 00:01:12,037
Monogram Monty Burns.
27
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Well...
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what if we throw a classic shindig
29
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at your old summer place?
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00:01:21,247 --> 00:01:22,380
Why, yes.
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A beachside bacchanal
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just like the Roaring Twenties.
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That'll put the Cole back in my Porter.
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What fun.
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Now, I have 45 close friends
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who are all pretty
amazing party planners.
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I'm not squandering money
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on some chap to bring in a photo booth.
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I'll take care of every detail myself.
40
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Everything, sir?
41
00:01:41,600 --> 00:01:43,500
Oh, fine. You can fetch the ice.
42
00:01:43,535 --> 00:01:45,402
Okay. How many bags?
43
00:01:45,437 --> 00:01:48,305
Oh, no. None of those
pricey store-bought cubes.
44
00:01:48,340 --> 00:01:50,506
Now, you head up to Northern Canada
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00:01:50,541 --> 00:01:52,674
and get me a quarter ton of lake ice.
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Hand-sawn and tong-carried.
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Risk my life in the arctic wilderness
48
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just to bring you some ice.
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It would be an honor.
50
00:02:00,684 --> 00:02:02,985
Would you like it packed in
cedar sawdust or Spanish oak?
51
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Oh, who cares? Ice is ice.
52
00:02:05,423 --> 00:02:07,489
It says Mega Stuf on the package,
53
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but these are Double Stuf at best.
54
00:02:09,792 --> 00:02:11,493
What?
55
00:02:11,528 --> 00:02:14,629
Send me a free tub of Stuf and
I'll shut down my Web site.
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00:02:14,664 --> 00:02:16,331
Mmm.
57
00:02:16,366 --> 00:02:18,899
Simpson, you seem fairly popular,
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00:02:18,935 --> 00:02:21,336
at least based on the cheers you
got at employee karaoke night.
59
00:02:21,371 --> 00:02:24,471
It's not me, it's "Mustang Sally."
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00:02:24,507 --> 00:02:26,240
Mr. Burns is throwing a little party,
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00:02:26,275 --> 00:02:29,976
and most of his invitees are
either dead or fictional.
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Uh, to, uh, well, fill out the crowd,
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00:02:31,813 --> 00:02:34,014
uh, perhaps you could, uh,
distribute these invitations
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00:02:34,049 --> 00:02:36,450
to your more, uh, presentable friends.
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I know just who to invite.
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00:02:38,987 --> 00:02:40,620
- You're not invited.
- To what?
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None of your business!
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00:02:43,591 --> 00:02:45,358
All right.
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00:02:45,393 --> 00:02:47,360
"Your esteemed
presence is requested
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"for an evening of madcap
magic and mischief
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at Monty Burns' Middle Hampton estate."
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The card stock is so thick.
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Bart, get in here and feel this stock.
74
00:02:58,405 --> 00:03:01,339
Oh, man, that's heavy.
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00:03:01,375 --> 00:03:02,774
The Springfield Hamptons?
76
00:03:02,809 --> 00:03:04,476
That's on Lengthy Island,
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00:03:04,511 --> 00:03:07,179
where rich people hang
out on summer weekends.
78
00:03:07,214 --> 00:03:11,349
I know all about it from
cartoons in literary magazines.
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00:03:11,385 --> 00:03:14,018
I'm not reading all that.
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00:03:14,054 --> 00:03:16,220
Well, now to select the
perfect guest list
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00:03:16,255 --> 00:03:19,990
of our city's sharpest wits
and glittering socialites.
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00:03:28,100 --> 00:03:31,201
Boy oh boy, a '20s shindig
at Old Man Burnsie's.
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00:03:31,236 --> 00:03:33,236
Probably gonna be
bathtubs full of shrimp
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00:03:33,271 --> 00:03:35,071
and Jacuzzis full of brisket.
85
00:03:35,106 --> 00:03:38,374
Maybe I'll meet a rich bachelor
who will sweep me off my feet.
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00:03:38,410 --> 00:03:40,276
How do I smell?
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00:03:40,312 --> 00:03:43,446
Like a wood fire put out
by dumping coffee on it.
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00:03:43,481 --> 00:03:45,281
Oh! Perfect.
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00:03:45,317 --> 00:03:46,382
Hey, everyone, hey!
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I'm off-duty, so please
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00:03:48,385 --> 00:03:50,419
don't feel weird doing
drugs in front of me.
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00:03:50,454 --> 00:03:52,254
Uh, or with me.
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00:03:52,289 --> 00:03:54,289
I became a cop too young.
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00:03:54,325 --> 00:03:55,757
I never lived.
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00:03:55,792 --> 00:03:57,593
I didn't live.
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00:03:57,628 --> 00:03:59,428
And so I entered
a world of wealth.
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00:03:59,463 --> 00:04:00,829
Where mansions are called "cottages."
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00:04:00,864 --> 00:04:02,497
And getting drunk on a boat
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00:04:02,533 --> 00:04:04,899
is called "sailing."
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00:04:11,140 --> 00:04:13,107
Get ready for fancy.
101
00:04:19,582 --> 00:04:21,081
I don't see any magic.
102
00:04:21,117 --> 00:04:22,949
And not a hint of mischief.
103
00:04:22,984 --> 00:04:24,451
Off-brand Ritz cracker?
104
00:04:24,486 --> 00:04:25,752
Salt pile?
105
00:04:25,787 --> 00:04:27,420
Nothing in a blanket?
106
00:04:27,456 --> 00:04:30,290
Dad, did Mr. Burns cheap out?
107
00:04:30,325 --> 00:04:31,658
That's impossible.
108
00:04:31,693 --> 00:04:33,826
He's the richest man in town.
109
00:04:33,862 --> 00:04:35,928
If I had known this was a cash bar,
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00:04:35,964 --> 00:04:39,065
I would've gotten wasted beforehand!
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00:04:39,100 --> 00:04:40,733
At my sister's house!
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Welcome, honored guests.
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Leave your inhibitions at the door.
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And write your name on your drink cup,
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you will not receive a second.
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Now, dance the night away on my
vintage 1920s parquet floor.
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The cleaning of which is not cheap,
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00:04:58,918 --> 00:05:01,319
so be sure to don your
protective booties.
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00:05:05,592 --> 00:05:07,057
Look, Mr. Burns,
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00:05:07,093 --> 00:05:09,560
nobody loves a party with
rules more than I do.
121
00:05:09,596 --> 00:05:12,129
Even I'm baffled by the
toilet payment system.
122
00:05:12,165 --> 00:05:14,298
Oh, it's simple, bring the chit
from the applicable restroom
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00:05:14,333 --> 00:05:15,965
to the purser...
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00:05:16,001 --> 00:05:18,769
You might've been fun a
hundred years ago, Burnsie,
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00:05:18,804 --> 00:05:20,504
but now you're a cheap, old lamewad.
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00:05:20,539 --> 00:05:23,440
And trust me, I know cheap.
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00:05:23,475 --> 00:05:25,275
That's right, I bought a suit,
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00:05:25,311 --> 00:05:27,844
Xeroxed it, returned
it, and wore the copy.
129
00:05:30,015 --> 00:05:32,615
- Waste of my time.
- Why is everyone leaving?
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00:05:32,650 --> 00:05:34,450
Of course, no ice.
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00:05:34,485 --> 00:05:36,352
Mm, that lazy Smithers is probably
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00:05:36,387 --> 00:05:38,321
sipping hot buttered rum in a ski chalet
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overlooking Lake Louise.
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Ah.
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00:05:47,997 --> 00:05:50,264
Uh-oh.
136
00:05:50,300 --> 00:05:52,066
Aw.
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00:05:59,749 --> 00:06:02,310
Hey, Mr. Burns, fun party.
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00:06:02,346 --> 00:06:04,978
No one felt any pressure
to talk or laugh
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00:06:05,013 --> 00:06:06,814
or stay past 7:30.
140
00:06:06,849 --> 00:06:08,114
Super chill.
141
00:06:08,150 --> 00:06:10,451
Oh, hush. I'm a worn-out old miser
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00:06:10,486 --> 00:06:13,387
who's forgotten the meaning of fun.
143
00:06:14,724 --> 00:06:16,623
Great Gatsby!
144
00:06:16,659 --> 00:06:18,325
What is that?
145
00:06:20,429 --> 00:06:22,729
Someone else is having a
party across the bay.
146
00:06:22,764 --> 00:06:24,530
Once I
would've thought nothing
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00:06:24,566 --> 00:06:27,032
of rowing across the water
and crashing that party.
148
00:06:27,068 --> 00:06:29,335
All doors would open for Monogram Monty.
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00:06:29,371 --> 00:06:31,371
That was a long time ago.
150
00:06:33,375 --> 00:06:34,940
Aw, I'll row you over.
151
00:06:34,976 --> 00:06:36,442
How hard could it be?
152
00:06:38,379 --> 00:06:39,611
Oh, so hard.
153
00:06:39,646 --> 00:06:40,912
Would it help if I whipped you?
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Maybe.
155
00:06:42,315 --> 00:06:43,615
Yeah, a little.
156
00:06:43,650 --> 00:06:45,684
Yeah, yeah.
157
00:06:46,920 --> 00:06:48,920
Yeah.
158
00:06:51,258 --> 00:06:53,258
♪ ♪
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Whoa, it's a white party.
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Just the kind I used to throw.
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00:06:59,532 --> 00:07:01,365
Although we interpreted the
theme a bit differently
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00:07:01,401 --> 00:07:02,900
in those days.
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♪ Aah! ♪
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00:07:04,303 --> 00:07:06,904
♪ Got a whole lot of money,
got a whole lot of money... ♪
165
00:07:06,939 --> 00:07:09,540
Mm, whoever is throwing
this magnificent to-do
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00:07:09,575 --> 00:07:12,009
knows how to enjoy their wealth.
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00:07:12,044 --> 00:07:13,342
♪ Got a whole lot of money ♪
168
00:07:13,378 --> 00:07:16,212
Ooh, excessive.
169
00:07:16,247 --> 00:07:18,347
Tell me, where can I find our host?
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00:07:18,383 --> 00:07:19,716
I haven't met him.
171
00:07:19,751 --> 00:07:21,885
No one has ever met him.
172
00:07:21,920 --> 00:07:23,252
He doesn't exist.
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00:07:23,288 --> 00:07:24,754
Oh, he's upstairs in his office.
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♪ ♪
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00:07:29,327 --> 00:07:31,126
Ooh.
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00:07:31,161 --> 00:07:34,396
Are you the host of
this incredible soiree?
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00:07:34,432 --> 00:07:36,498
I must tell you, it's
the most incandescent,
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00:07:36,534 --> 00:07:37,800
most dazzling...
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00:07:37,835 --> 00:07:39,468
My name is Jay G.
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00:07:39,503 --> 00:07:41,603
And nobody crashes my party.
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00:07:41,639 --> 00:07:44,339
Not even you nobodies.
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00:07:45,709 --> 00:07:47,308
Let's go, Mr. Burns.
183
00:07:47,343 --> 00:07:48,776
What did you say?
184
00:07:48,812 --> 00:07:50,812
Mr. Burns and I were just leaving.
185
00:07:50,847 --> 00:07:54,782
Are you Montgomery Burns,
the despised billionaire?
186
00:07:54,818 --> 00:07:57,017
Well, that's what my cuff links say.
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00:07:57,053 --> 00:08:00,455
There's something I've wanted
to tell you for a long time,
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00:08:00,490 --> 00:08:02,423
you ruthless monster.
189
00:08:03,647 --> 00:08:06,481
I love you.
190
00:08:09,443 --> 00:08:13,092
I can't believe I'm
meeting the Monty Burns.
191
00:08:13,117 --> 00:08:14,917
How do you know me?
192
00:08:14,952 --> 00:08:18,086
You're the dude who wrote
The Rungs of Ruthlessness.
193
00:08:18,121 --> 00:08:20,889
Yes, back then
they'd give a book contract
194
00:08:20,924 --> 00:08:24,426
to any CEO with a power
tie and a bonsai tree.
195
00:08:24,461 --> 00:08:26,060
When I was a boy, I found a copy
196
00:08:26,096 --> 00:08:27,896
left on the seat of a bus I stole.
197
00:08:27,931 --> 00:08:31,466
And after I read it, I knew I'd
jacked my last courtesy shuttle.
198
00:08:31,502 --> 00:08:34,068
Your book became my bible.
199
00:08:34,104 --> 00:08:36,304
"Every empire needs an emblem."
200
00:08:36,339 --> 00:08:38,472
See? There you told me to find a symbol
201
00:08:38,508 --> 00:08:39,940
to represent my brand.
202
00:08:39,975 --> 00:08:44,445
And there he is, the living
logo of Golden Goose Records,
203
00:08:44,480 --> 00:08:46,480
Goosius.
204
00:08:46,516 --> 00:08:49,850
You make me believe I can fly.
205
00:08:49,885 --> 00:08:51,751
Goosius is on everything
206
00:08:51,787 --> 00:08:53,486
from my cognac-flavored vodka
207
00:08:53,522 --> 00:08:56,323
to the brake pads I
coproduced with Lil Wayne.
208
00:08:58,593 --> 00:09:01,561
Aw, he eats the same way I do,
209
00:09:01,596 --> 00:09:03,262
without swallowing.
210
00:09:03,298 --> 00:09:06,566
You've flown south for the
winter with my heart.
211
00:09:06,601 --> 00:09:07,667
Ow!
212
00:09:07,703 --> 00:09:10,669
I hope this bite never heals.
213
00:09:10,705 --> 00:09:12,471
When I wrote an advice
book, I never dreamed
214
00:09:12,506 --> 00:09:14,005
it would help anyone.
215
00:09:14,041 --> 00:09:17,175
Everything I am I owe to you.
216
00:09:18,646 --> 00:09:19,778
And a little bit to Baz Luhrmann.
217
00:09:19,814 --> 00:09:22,614
♪ When I was born, our
cupboards were barren ♪
218
00:09:22,650 --> 00:09:25,283
♪ Now I'm inside of a blue McLaren ♪
219
00:09:25,319 --> 00:09:26,283
♪ Blue McLaren? ♪
220
00:09:26,319 --> 00:09:27,485
♪ They all be starin' 'cause ♪
221
00:09:27,520 --> 00:09:28,453
♪ He's a hip-hop Vanderbilt ♪
222
00:09:28,488 --> 00:09:29,821
♪ I'm so established ♪
223
00:09:29,856 --> 00:09:31,589
- ♪ My life is fabulous
♪ - ♪ Sugar trust. ♪
224
00:09:31,624 --> 00:09:33,624
♪ ♪
225
00:09:35,528 --> 00:09:38,963
This. This is what I thought
I'd never have again.
226
00:09:38,998 --> 00:09:41,131
Well, then good news, Monty.
227
00:09:41,167 --> 00:09:43,567
This is your party.
228
00:09:46,605 --> 00:09:49,740
And so was forged the
most unlikely of friendships.
229
00:09:49,775 --> 00:09:51,908
A man who discovered Rick Ross
230
00:09:51,943 --> 00:09:54,911
and a man who dated Betsy Ross.
231
00:09:54,946 --> 00:09:58,047
The next day, my family
explored Middle Hampton.
232
00:09:58,083 --> 00:09:59,849
A wonderland of boutiques
233
00:09:59,884 --> 00:10:01,484
paid for by rich husbands
234
00:10:01,519 --> 00:10:03,652
wanting to keep their wives busy.
235
00:10:03,688 --> 00:10:05,388
Mainly second wives.
236
00:10:05,423 --> 00:10:08,824
♪ Hampton, ah, Hampton. ♪
237
00:10:08,860 --> 00:10:11,494
What kind of crazy flavors are these?
238
00:10:11,529 --> 00:10:13,028
Quince jelly and pepper?
239
00:10:13,063 --> 00:10:14,363
Market greens?
240
00:10:14,399 --> 00:10:15,598
Bone broth brittle?
241
00:10:15,633 --> 00:10:17,432
I don't know what this place hates more,
242
00:10:17,467 --> 00:10:18,767
kids or ice cream.
243
00:10:18,802 --> 00:10:21,202
Really, man, a 3 Series?
244
00:10:21,237 --> 00:10:22,470
I mean, what is he?
245
00:10:22,506 --> 00:10:23,805
A sophomore at Exeter?
246
00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:26,073
Yeah, one cup of salted caramel.
247
00:10:26,109 --> 00:10:28,976
Woo-woo-woo, scoop with
the stripe, stupid.
248
00:10:29,012 --> 00:10:30,278
I mean...
249
00:10:30,313 --> 00:10:31,946
That kid just cut in line.
250
00:10:31,981 --> 00:10:33,747
Are you gonna let him do that?
251
00:10:33,783 --> 00:10:35,582
That's Blake Black.
252
00:10:35,618 --> 00:10:37,150
His dad runs BlackLake Investments.
253
00:10:37,185 --> 00:10:38,452
So?
254
00:10:38,487 --> 00:10:40,421
Richest dad rules?
255
00:10:40,456 --> 00:10:41,655
Everyone knows that.
256
00:10:41,690 --> 00:10:43,390
Well, I don't.
257
00:10:43,426 --> 00:10:44,458
Don't misunderstand me,
258
00:10:44,493 --> 00:10:47,294
Mats Wilander may have
been a decent player,
259
00:10:47,329 --> 00:10:50,663
but until his inglés gets
just a little bit better,
260
00:10:50,698 --> 00:10:52,197
he can coach somebody else.
261
00:10:52,233 --> 00:10:53,299
Pardon me a second.
262
00:10:53,334 --> 00:10:55,301
What is it, head points, what?
263
00:10:55,336 --> 00:10:57,102
Just because your father has money
264
00:10:57,138 --> 00:10:58,871
doesn't mean you can cut.
265
00:10:58,907 --> 00:11:01,474
Hmm, it kind of looks like it does.
266
00:11:01,509 --> 00:11:02,642
All right, I'll tell you what:
267
00:11:02,677 --> 00:11:04,076
because I am a nice guy,
268
00:11:04,111 --> 00:11:06,813
I am going to pay for everyone's cones.
269
00:11:06,848 --> 00:11:09,414
Is that okay? Does that make it okay?
270
00:11:09,450 --> 00:11:10,649
- Yeah!
- Yes!
271
00:11:10,684 --> 00:11:11,716
No!
272
00:11:11,752 --> 00:11:13,418
I would never accept ice cream
273
00:11:13,454 --> 00:11:16,588
from someone whose manners are
in the bottom one percent!
274
00:11:17,958 --> 00:11:19,324
Boom.
275
00:11:20,393 --> 00:11:21,827
So, hey, hi.
276
00:11:21,862 --> 00:11:23,328
Are you going to the Allens'
277
00:11:23,363 --> 00:11:24,695
hot-dog-and-horseshoes thing later?
278
00:11:24,730 --> 00:11:25,696
No.
279
00:11:25,731 --> 00:11:27,798
The Forstmans' firefly thing?
280
00:11:27,834 --> 00:11:28,799
No.
281
00:11:28,835 --> 00:11:30,668
The Olins' jellyfish fry thing?
282
00:11:30,703 --> 00:11:33,270
I'm not going to any things at all!
283
00:11:33,305 --> 00:11:36,674
But I want to, um, hang out.
284
00:11:36,709 --> 00:11:38,208
What? Why?
285
00:11:38,243 --> 00:11:40,277
I've never met anyone like you before.
286
00:11:40,312 --> 00:11:42,645
Anyone with, you know, I don't know, um,
287
00:11:42,681 --> 00:11:43,880
morals.
288
00:11:43,915 --> 00:11:45,314
Oh.
289
00:11:45,350 --> 00:11:47,517
Well, I guess it is a little judgy of me
290
00:11:47,552 --> 00:11:50,453
to be completely disgusted by you.
291
00:11:50,489 --> 00:11:52,755
Great, I'll set something up.
Erin, are you on?
292
00:11:52,791 --> 00:11:55,725
Okay, I need to bail on the
Kravises' freeze tag thing.
293
00:11:55,760 --> 00:11:57,560
No, I know, I have to.
294
00:11:57,596 --> 00:11:59,361
Send the big basket.
295
00:11:59,396 --> 00:12:00,696
What's wrong, honey?
296
00:12:00,731 --> 00:12:02,430
Lisa's got a rich boyfriend,
297
00:12:02,466 --> 00:12:04,766
Dad's hanging out with a
hip-hop super producer,
298
00:12:04,802 --> 00:12:06,334
and I'm stuck window-shopping
299
00:12:06,370 --> 00:12:09,137
with you two fun-sucking stink buckets.
300
00:12:09,172 --> 00:12:10,372
It's not fair!
301
00:12:10,407 --> 00:12:12,173
Life's not fair, kid.
302
00:12:12,209 --> 00:12:13,375
Do I know you?
303
00:12:13,410 --> 00:12:15,643
If life was fair, you would know me.
304
00:12:15,678 --> 00:12:18,312
But know this: Jay G ain't all that.
305
00:12:18,347 --> 00:12:19,179
What do you mean?
306
00:12:19,215 --> 00:12:20,848
Buy a candle and I'll tell you.
307
00:12:20,884 --> 00:12:22,349
What's your cheapest one?
308
00:12:22,385 --> 00:12:23,885
$55.
309
00:12:23,920 --> 00:12:27,421
No way. I could start a fire
in the woods for nothing.
310
00:12:27,456 --> 00:12:30,424
So Bart met someone who
I think comes back later.
311
00:12:30,459 --> 00:12:32,092
I forget why.
312
00:12:32,128 --> 00:12:35,194
Hmm. Who would have thought
two billionaire Republicans
313
00:12:35,230 --> 00:12:37,764
from such different backgrounds
could end up as chums?
314
00:12:37,799 --> 00:12:41,001
Is not green a more powerful
color than black or white?
315
00:12:41,036 --> 00:12:44,004
The Lord picks a select few
to accumulate more money
316
00:12:44,039 --> 00:12:45,405
than anyone else.
317
00:12:45,440 --> 00:12:47,707
You and I bear that sacred avarice.
318
00:12:47,743 --> 00:12:50,776
Each of my enterprises has its own G6.
319
00:12:50,811 --> 00:12:52,411
What's that one?
320
00:12:52,446 --> 00:12:54,613
That's for my...
321
00:12:54,649 --> 00:12:56,515
personal horticulturalist.
322
00:12:56,551 --> 00:12:58,250
You know what I'm sayin'?
323
00:12:58,285 --> 00:12:59,585
I don't.
324
00:13:09,863 --> 00:13:11,529
You seem to get so much joy
325
00:13:11,565 --> 00:13:13,598
out of your money. I envy you.
326
00:13:13,633 --> 00:13:15,934
You've given me so much, Monty.
327
00:13:15,969 --> 00:13:19,704
Let me give you something back:
the freedom to live large.
328
00:13:21,708 --> 00:13:23,574
A charge plate?
329
00:13:23,609 --> 00:13:26,677
I've never had one of those
newfangled swipe-a-ma-jigs.
330
00:13:26,712 --> 00:13:29,846
It's an Obsidian Card,
the most exclusive.
331
00:13:29,882 --> 00:13:32,716
No spending limit, no store
has ever heard of it.
332
00:13:32,751 --> 00:13:34,651
But they have to accept it.
333
00:13:34,687 --> 00:13:37,153
Take it if you want to roll like G.
334
00:13:39,658 --> 00:13:40,590
Don't forget to sign it.
335
00:13:40,625 --> 00:13:41,791
Oh, right.
336
00:13:41,826 --> 00:13:44,660
No, no, not a felt-tip.
Oh! It'll smudge.
337
00:13:44,696 --> 00:13:46,462
Okay, quick, blow on it to dry the ink.
338
00:13:52,937 --> 00:13:55,905
Blake, I have to say, this whale watch
339
00:13:55,940 --> 00:13:58,707
was a very thoughtful idea.
340
00:13:58,742 --> 00:14:02,343
Oh, it's a whole family.
341
00:14:02,378 --> 00:14:04,012
But they're so far away.
342
00:14:04,047 --> 00:14:06,915
Far? Babe, when you whale watch with me,
343
00:14:06,950 --> 00:14:08,483
you sit pod-side.
344
00:14:08,518 --> 00:14:10,952
Fellas! What can we do here?
345
00:14:11,989 --> 00:14:15,756
This way, the whales know we are VIPs.
346
00:14:15,791 --> 00:14:17,491
Um, where's the baby?
347
00:14:17,526 --> 00:14:18,592
There's supposed to be a baby.
348
00:14:18,628 --> 00:14:20,327
I paid for a calf.
349
00:14:20,362 --> 00:14:22,496
Does that mean anything?
350
00:14:22,531 --> 00:14:25,833
Whale-copters? VIP pod-view?
351
00:14:25,868 --> 00:14:27,501
This is awful!
352
00:14:27,536 --> 00:14:30,237
Well, if we went on
some lame econo-watch,
353
00:14:30,272 --> 00:14:32,304
we might not see blowhole one.
354
00:14:32,340 --> 00:14:33,640
I mean, what are you saying?
355
00:14:33,675 --> 00:14:34,841
Are you hearing yourself?
356
00:14:34,876 --> 00:14:37,443
Blake, I really believed
you could change.
357
00:14:37,478 --> 00:14:40,312
And you did, you became
even more horrible.
358
00:14:45,419 --> 00:14:47,720
These aren't VIP emotions.
359
00:14:47,756 --> 00:14:48,787
This is worse than the time
360
00:14:48,822 --> 00:14:51,356
I had to eat grocery store sushi.
361
00:14:51,391 --> 00:14:54,192
The shiso leaf was plastic!
362
00:14:54,227 --> 00:14:55,694
It was plastic!
363
00:14:55,729 --> 00:14:58,329
You got to buy it, M.B., it's fate.
364
00:15:01,001 --> 00:15:03,101
Oh, I don't know.
365
00:15:03,137 --> 00:15:05,903
$100,000 feels like a lot of money.
366
00:15:05,938 --> 00:15:07,571
You've got to splash the cash,
367
00:15:07,606 --> 00:15:09,674
fling the bling, spill them bills.
368
00:15:09,709 --> 00:15:12,442
It don't matter, just
splatter the batter.
369
00:15:12,478 --> 00:15:14,679
Splash the cash.
370
00:15:17,984 --> 00:15:21,218
Monogram Monty is back!
371
00:15:21,253 --> 00:15:22,986
♪ I got a whole lot of money ♪
372
00:15:23,021 --> 00:15:24,487
♪ A whole lot of money ♪
373
00:15:24,522 --> 00:15:25,889
- ♪ What you want? ♪ - ♪
A whole lot of money ♪
374
00:15:25,924 --> 00:15:27,390
- ♪ I got ♪ - ♪ A
who-whole lot of money ♪
375
00:15:27,425 --> 00:15:28,391
♪ How much? ♪
376
00:15:28,426 --> 00:15:29,693
♪ A whole lot of money ♪
377
00:15:29,728 --> 00:15:30,727
♪ Whole lot ♪
378
00:15:30,762 --> 00:15:32,028
- ♪ What's up? ♪ - ♪ Over here ♪
379
00:15:32,064 --> 00:15:33,029
- ♪ What's up? ♪ - ♪ Over there ♪
380
00:15:36,902 --> 00:15:38,968
♪ I got a whole lot of money ♪
381
00:15:39,004 --> 00:15:40,502
♪ A whole lot of money ♪
382
00:15:40,537 --> 00:15:42,137
- ♪ What you want? ♪ - ♪
A whole lot of money ♪
383
00:15:42,173 --> 00:15:44,339
♪ I got it ♪
384
00:15:44,374 --> 00:15:45,908
♪ When the night come on ♪
385
00:15:45,943 --> 00:15:49,111
♪ I already know what time it is ♪
386
00:15:49,146 --> 00:15:50,312
♪ She gon' drop. ♪
387
00:15:51,749 --> 00:15:54,016
Now, what are you generous
folks willing to pay
388
00:15:54,051 --> 00:15:56,418
for a basketball lesson
with Charles Barkley?
389
00:15:56,453 --> 00:15:57,418
$10,000.
390
00:15:57,453 --> 00:15:58,720
$20,000. $30,000.
391
00:15:58,755 --> 00:16:00,021
Do I hear $50,000?
392
00:16:00,056 --> 00:16:02,656
$1 million.
393
00:16:02,692 --> 00:16:05,359
M.B., if you could only feel
what I feel right now...
394
00:16:05,394 --> 00:16:08,362
$1 million, going once, going twice...
395
00:16:08,397 --> 00:16:09,563
$10 million!
396
00:16:10,600 --> 00:16:11,465
Sold!
397
00:16:11,500 --> 00:16:13,400
I just spent more money than I know
398
00:16:13,436 --> 00:16:15,001
on something I don't even want.
399
00:16:15,037 --> 00:16:17,337
And it's the greatest
feeling I've ever had!
400
00:16:21,017 --> 00:16:22,602
Still better than Shaq.
401
00:16:23,587 --> 00:16:26,406
Mr. Burns was living the highlight.
402
00:16:26,431 --> 00:16:29,799
splurging on every luxury, even
the ultimate indulgence...
403
00:16:30,173 --> 00:16:33,274
useless hangers-on like me.
404
00:16:35,745 --> 00:16:37,078
Noice.
405
00:16:37,113 --> 00:16:40,380
To think, all the years I
wasted without a posse.
406
00:16:40,415 --> 00:16:42,082
Good-bye, loneliness.
407
00:16:42,117 --> 00:16:43,416
We get all this stuff
408
00:16:43,451 --> 00:16:45,485
just for letting Mr. Burns
beat us in mini golf.
409
00:16:45,520 --> 00:16:46,953
What a deal!
410
00:16:46,989 --> 00:16:49,422
My whole job is to not
make eye contact with him.
411
00:16:52,527 --> 00:16:54,594
I thought I'd get tired
of window-shopping
412
00:16:54,629 --> 00:16:57,696
in this fancy little town,
but it ain't happening.
413
00:16:57,731 --> 00:17:00,966
A chessboard where the
pieces are lipsticks!
414
00:17:05,006 --> 00:17:07,173
A horse show!
415
00:17:08,242 --> 00:17:10,910
A protest!
416
00:17:10,945 --> 00:17:12,444
Huh?
417
00:17:13,446 --> 00:17:14,979
Blake, is that you?
418
00:17:15,015 --> 00:17:16,480
What happened to your privilege?
419
00:17:16,516 --> 00:17:17,715
I checked it.
420
00:17:18,751 --> 00:17:20,285
Lisa, when you rejected me,
421
00:17:20,320 --> 00:17:23,021
I knew I had to do whatever it took
422
00:17:23,056 --> 00:17:24,355
to become worthy of you.
423
00:17:24,390 --> 00:17:27,625
This now runs on solar
power and falafel.
424
00:17:27,660 --> 00:17:29,760
Now, that's sustainable!
425
00:17:29,796 --> 00:17:32,029
I've dedicated my entire allowance
426
00:17:32,064 --> 00:17:34,364
to Trustafarians for Horse Justice.
427
00:17:34,399 --> 00:17:36,633
Here's an upside down
bucket for you to drum on.
428
00:17:36,668 --> 00:17:38,635
Well, what girl could say no
429
00:17:38,670 --> 00:17:41,371
to a socially conscious drum circle?
430
00:17:41,406 --> 00:17:42,639
Yo, lamp dress,
431
00:17:42,674 --> 00:17:45,809
I've got all access paddock
passes to the horse show.
432
00:17:45,845 --> 00:17:48,377
Check out these sweet mane combs.
433
00:17:48,412 --> 00:17:50,713
I can get you up close to the horses
434
00:17:50,748 --> 00:17:53,316
for primo grooming time.
435
00:17:53,351 --> 00:17:54,951
Combing is murder!
436
00:17:54,986 --> 00:17:57,019
Combing is murder!
437
00:17:57,055 --> 00:17:59,188
Primo grooming time.
438
00:17:59,224 --> 00:18:01,590
The test of a
first-rate intelligence
439
00:18:01,625 --> 00:18:03,792
is the ability to hold
two opposing ideas
440
00:18:03,828 --> 00:18:05,593
in the mind at the same time
441
00:18:05,628 --> 00:18:08,463
and still retain the
ability to function.
442
00:18:08,498 --> 00:18:11,532
Horsey, horsey, horsey, horsey, horsey!
443
00:18:14,571 --> 00:18:17,839
For her, I gave up
what meant most to me:
444
00:18:17,875 --> 00:18:19,640
being a douche.
445
00:18:25,581 --> 00:18:29,416
Mr. Burns, your bill came
from the Obsidian Card.
446
00:18:29,451 --> 00:18:31,385
Are you sure you're not
spending too much money?
447
00:18:31,420 --> 00:18:33,020
Hush, you sound like Smithers.
448
00:18:33,055 --> 00:18:35,422
Where is that loafer with my ice?
449
00:18:51,572 --> 00:18:52,872
Fill her up!
450
00:18:52,908 --> 00:18:54,073
And make it snappy.
451
00:18:54,109 --> 00:18:55,540
My best pal and I are going shopping
452
00:18:55,575 --> 00:18:57,809
for those yachts that have
little submarines in them.
453
00:18:57,844 --> 00:19:00,012
Sir, your card was declined.
454
00:19:00,047 --> 00:19:01,313
Goulash!
455
00:19:01,348 --> 00:19:02,514
Absolute goulash!
456
00:19:02,549 --> 00:19:03,848
It's linked to my bank account.
457
00:19:03,884 --> 00:19:05,183
I'd have to be penniless
458
00:19:05,219 --> 00:19:06,518
before that card didn't work.
459
00:19:06,553 --> 00:19:09,321
Well, then that means you're broke.
460
00:19:09,356 --> 00:19:10,488
Broke?
461
00:19:10,524 --> 00:19:11,823
Me?
462
00:19:11,858 --> 00:19:14,091
Broke? Me?
463
00:19:14,127 --> 00:19:16,260
Yes, I'm afraid I have
to destroy your card.
464
00:19:16,296 --> 00:19:18,495
Good luck. It's tempered titanium
465
00:19:18,531 --> 00:19:20,531
and coated with powdered diamond.
466
00:19:26,072 --> 00:19:28,039
♪ I ain't got no money ♪
467
00:19:28,074 --> 00:19:30,073
♪ I ain't got no money. ♪
468
00:19:32,644 --> 00:19:34,444
Don't take it.
469
00:19:34,479 --> 00:19:37,713
This car leased in someone
else's name is who I am!
470
00:19:37,749 --> 00:19:41,084
My entire fortune, spent and gone.
471
00:19:41,119 --> 00:19:43,553
I splashed all my cash.
472
00:19:43,588 --> 00:19:45,455
Don't be so hard on yourself.
473
00:19:45,490 --> 00:19:47,289
It was your first credit card.
474
00:19:47,325 --> 00:19:50,392
And I handled it as well as a
freshman at Michigan State!
475
00:19:50,428 --> 00:19:54,163
Mr. Burns, I think Jay wanted
you to bankrupt yourself.
476
00:19:54,198 --> 00:19:55,297
Why would you say such a thing?
477
00:19:55,340 --> 00:19:58,140
It's number one on the charts.
478
00:19:58,169 --> 00:19:59,651
♪ ♪
479
00:19:59,676 --> 00:20:01,219
♪ Used to be the man, Burns ♪
480
00:20:01,244 --> 00:20:02,909
♪ Now you just a bad joke ♪
481
00:20:02,934 --> 00:20:04,431
♪ Used to be about to die ♪
482
00:20:04,456 --> 00:20:05,979
♪ Now you only dead broke ♪
483
00:20:06,004 --> 00:20:07,470
♪ I gave you the card, Burns ♪
484
00:20:07,495 --> 00:20:09,229
♪ And you spent your mind out ♪
485
00:20:09,254 --> 00:20:10,787
♪ It was all a trap, yo ♪
486
00:20:10,812 --> 00:20:12,463
♪ As you 'bout to find out ♪
487
00:20:12,582 --> 00:20:15,350
Jay G is CEO of Obsidian!
488
00:20:15,385 --> 00:20:18,073
Biotch!
489
00:20:18,098 --> 00:20:19,763
♪ Now your bank account is withering ♪
490
00:20:19,788 --> 00:20:21,354
♪ Your bottom lip is quivering ♪
491
00:20:21,379 --> 00:20:22,916
♪ You're Hufflepuff, I'm Slytherin ♪
492
00:20:22,941 --> 00:20:24,518
♪ There's no one doin' your Smitherin' ♪
493
00:20:24,936 --> 00:20:26,403
♪ This is where your money went ♪
494
00:20:26,428 --> 00:20:28,128
♪ Evict you from the one percent ♪
495
00:20:28,163 --> 00:20:30,130
♪ Now watch me as my fingers tent ♪
496
00:20:30,165 --> 00:20:32,499
♪ 'Cause I own you, it is excellent ♪
497
00:20:32,534 --> 00:20:34,901
♪ Excellent ♪
498
00:20:34,936 --> 00:20:38,337
♪ You're broke now ♪
499
00:20:38,373 --> 00:20:40,072
♪ Your cash was your passion ♪
500
00:20:40,108 --> 00:20:44,443
♪ Now Jay owns your ass, son. ♪
501
00:20:47,215 --> 00:20:49,382
If these rhymes are to be believed,
502
00:20:49,417 --> 00:20:52,418
Jay lured me into debt and
now he owns everything.
503
00:20:52,453 --> 00:20:54,386
Even my beloved nuclear plant.
504
00:20:54,421 --> 00:20:56,687
Our magical friendship was a sham!
505
00:20:56,723 --> 00:20:58,789
The loneliest
moment in someone's life
506
00:20:58,825 --> 00:21:01,326
is when they're watching their
whole world fall apart.
507
00:21:01,361 --> 00:21:05,163
And all they can do is stare blankly.
508
00:21:05,198 --> 00:21:08,166
Oh, no, wait, he's crying now.
That's worse.
509
00:21:08,201 --> 00:21:10,868
Now he's really sobbing heavy.
510
00:21:10,904 --> 00:21:14,371
Oh, now he's gone to his knees
and he ripped his shirt open.
511
00:21:14,407 --> 00:21:16,606
All of his buttons
fell off of his shirt.
512
00:21:16,642 --> 00:21:18,675
Oh, now he's kicking his porch.
513
00:21:18,710 --> 00:21:21,078
Oh, he hurt his foot and
he's hopping around.
514
00:21:21,113 --> 00:21:22,779
Oh, he tripped over a dog.
515
00:21:25,384 --> 00:21:27,051
That's way worse.
516
00:21:27,819 --> 00:21:31,153
Montgomery Burns had hit rock-bottom.
517
00:21:32,163 --> 00:21:34,461
F. Scott Fitzgerald onde wrote:
518
00:21:34,486 --> 00:21:36,883
"There are no second
acts in American lives."
519
00:21:36,908 --> 00:21:39,041
But he never said anything
about second parts
520
00:21:39,077 --> 00:21:41,177
in American TV shows.
521
00:21:41,403 --> 00:21:43,203
I should've seen it all coming.
522
00:21:43,228 --> 00:21:46,063
My eyes were clouded by
the cataracts of excess.
523
00:21:46,098 --> 00:21:48,131
And by an excess of cataracts.
524
00:21:48,167 --> 00:21:50,132
Wait. What happened to my posse?
525
00:21:50,168 --> 00:21:54,002
Don't you worry. A posse's
loyalty is forever.
526
00:21:54,038 --> 00:21:56,605
Hey, Burnsie, I didn't get any
brand-new sneakers today.
527
00:21:56,640 --> 00:21:59,241
I can't be wearing two-day-old sneakers.
528
00:21:59,277 --> 00:22:00,876
Hey, if there's no
more money, we'll take
529
00:22:00,911 --> 00:22:02,511
our personalized bowling balls,
530
00:22:02,547 --> 00:22:05,047
fold-up bicycles, and go.
531
00:22:11,654 --> 00:22:14,189
I'm here for my hounds.
532
00:22:16,126 --> 00:22:18,460
Huh! Preposterous. I raised
those hounds from pups.
533
00:22:18,495 --> 00:22:20,462
I'm the only master they've ever known.
534
00:22:20,497 --> 00:22:22,964
One word from me and
they'll rip you apart.
535
00:22:22,999 --> 00:22:24,098
Commence ripping!
536
00:22:28,670 --> 00:22:31,638
Dogs can smell power.
537
00:22:31,673 --> 00:22:34,341
Sign this release legally
releasing the hounds.
538
00:22:34,376 --> 00:22:37,478
If you don't, Mr. Jay G
will release the hounds.
539
00:22:41,016 --> 00:22:43,449
Jay, I don't understand. I
thought we were friends.
540
00:22:43,485 --> 00:22:46,085
We were going to open up a
money-losing winery together.
541
00:22:46,121 --> 00:22:49,155
We can still hang out. Even
though our owners are fighting.
542
00:22:50,225 --> 00:22:53,058
Not being bitten...
543
00:22:53,094 --> 00:22:54,994
hurts the most.
544
00:22:57,132 --> 00:22:59,564
Everyone's gone.
Even Smithers never bothered
545
00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:02,334
to return from Canada with my lake ice.
546
00:23:19,118 --> 00:23:22,085
Good Simpson. Faithful Simpson.
547
00:23:22,121 --> 00:23:23,787
You would never go back
to the nuclear plant
548
00:23:23,822 --> 00:23:25,389
that was so cruelly taken from me.
549
00:23:28,194 --> 00:23:29,393
What does your heart say?
550
00:23:29,428 --> 00:23:30,894
I looked deep into my heart,
551
00:23:30,929 --> 00:23:32,062
and it said...
552
00:23:32,097 --> 00:23:34,364
Uh... let me ask my wife.
553
00:23:34,399 --> 00:23:36,499
I don't care if Mr. Burns doesn't own
554
00:23:36,535 --> 00:23:40,170
the nuclear plant anymore. You
still have to work there.
555
00:23:40,205 --> 00:23:42,539
You have a wife, a family,
556
00:23:42,574 --> 00:23:44,374
and a store to support.
557
00:23:44,409 --> 00:23:45,975
You're right, you're right.
558
00:23:46,010 --> 00:23:47,510
Wait. A store?
559
00:23:47,546 --> 00:23:48,844
I have a store.
560
00:23:48,880 --> 00:23:50,212
How did that happen?
561
00:23:50,247 --> 00:23:52,013
Well, you spend enough
time in the Hamptons
562
00:23:52,049 --> 00:23:54,082
and you have any flair at all,
563
00:23:54,117 --> 00:23:56,151
you just wind up with a store.
564
00:23:56,187 --> 00:23:58,987
♪ What could possibly
go wrong with retail? ♪
565
00:23:59,022 --> 00:24:01,956
Where should we put the
19th century doctor's kits?
566
00:24:01,992 --> 00:24:05,827
Ooh, ooh! In the window next
to the state-shaped erasers.
567
00:24:05,862 --> 00:24:08,829
But I feel bad leaving Mr.
Burns. I'm all he's got.
568
00:24:08,864 --> 00:24:11,165
Can't we live off the
money from your store?
569
00:24:11,201 --> 00:24:13,167
Oh, God, no!
570
00:24:13,203 --> 00:24:15,670
Right now I'm still building inventory.
571
00:24:15,705 --> 00:24:17,471
Luckily, the pincushion
store across the street
572
00:24:17,507 --> 00:24:19,039
went out of business.
573
00:24:19,075 --> 00:24:22,210
I just swooped right in
and bought up everything.
574
00:24:22,245 --> 00:24:23,976
Okay.
575
00:24:24,012 --> 00:24:25,245
With my dear wife
losing her marbles,
576
00:24:25,280 --> 00:24:27,414
I had to turn my back
on poor, broken Burns
577
00:24:27,449 --> 00:24:32,452
and go to work at, well, the
sexiest nuclear plant on Earth.
578
00:24:32,487 --> 00:24:35,054
♪ Radioactive ♪
579
00:24:35,090 --> 00:24:36,690
♪ R-R-R-Radioactive ♪
580
00:24:36,725 --> 00:24:38,291
Homer Simpson?
581
00:24:38,327 --> 00:24:40,292
Boss wants to see you.
582
00:24:40,328 --> 00:24:42,228
- ♪ Booty like a power plant ♪
- WOMAN: Hey, baby.
583
00:24:42,263 --> 00:24:44,129
♪ You're blowin' up my pants,
I like the way you dance ♪
584
00:24:44,164 --> 00:24:45,631
Mixtape coming soon, ladies.
585
00:24:45,666 --> 00:24:48,867
♪ J-J-J-Jay's got the power! ♪
586
00:24:52,906 --> 00:24:56,074
"Rung six. To ensure
an employee's loyalty,
587
00:24:56,110 --> 00:24:59,310
you must crush their
attachments to the past."
588
00:25:00,614 --> 00:25:03,080
You wanted to see me, Mr. G?
589
00:25:03,116 --> 00:25:05,550
Relax, Homer, we're good.
When you entered my gates,
590
00:25:05,585 --> 00:25:08,720
I knew you'd turn your
back on Old Man Burns.
591
00:25:08,755 --> 00:25:10,121
And I respect that.
592
00:25:10,156 --> 00:25:12,123
Yeah. I ditched him, all right.
593
00:25:12,158 --> 00:25:13,891
In his hour of need.
594
00:25:13,926 --> 00:25:15,125
But I feel good about it.
595
00:25:15,160 --> 00:25:16,426
Really good.
596
00:25:17,730 --> 00:25:19,095
Ow! Ow!
597
00:25:19,131 --> 00:25:21,898
Oh... I missed that.
598
00:25:21,933 --> 00:25:23,900
Because I know you're so loyal to me,
599
00:25:23,935 --> 00:25:26,403
I have a very special job for you.
600
00:25:26,438 --> 00:25:28,538
Removing the last trace of Monty Burns
601
00:25:28,574 --> 00:25:30,574
from the power plant he loves.
602
00:25:44,722 --> 00:25:45,788
Don't look at me.
603
00:25:45,823 --> 00:25:47,523
Stop looking at me!
604
00:25:49,092 --> 00:25:51,393
You did good.
605
00:25:52,729 --> 00:25:54,996
Here's your reward.
606
00:25:57,100 --> 00:25:58,933
Cobbler.
607
00:25:58,968 --> 00:26:02,504
I've got a granny in Atlanta who
custom bakes them just for me.
608
00:26:02,539 --> 00:26:04,839
Peach, berry, cherry,
609
00:26:04,874 --> 00:26:06,106
rhubarb, pineapple.
610
00:26:06,141 --> 00:26:08,942
You can't cobbler pineapple.
611
00:26:08,977 --> 00:26:10,511
Yet here it is.
612
00:26:12,848 --> 00:26:14,348
Homie, what's wrong?
613
00:26:14,383 --> 00:26:19,320
I've never seen
such beautiful cobbler.
614
00:26:19,355 --> 00:26:22,155
But there was a hole in me
that even a thousand pans
615
00:26:22,191 --> 00:26:23,790
of hot fruit couldn't fill.
616
00:26:23,825 --> 00:26:26,992
I had betrayed Mr. Burns
and felt sick about it.
617
00:26:27,028 --> 00:26:29,228
Searching for an open
grave in which to barf,
618
00:26:29,263 --> 00:26:31,331
I heard a horrible sound,
619
00:26:31,366 --> 00:26:33,533
which I was strangely drawn towards.
620
00:26:33,568 --> 00:26:37,169
♪ After
the ball is over ♪
621
00:26:37,205 --> 00:26:40,205
♪ After the break of dawn ♪
622
00:26:40,240 --> 00:26:43,208
♪ After the dancers' leaving ♪
623
00:26:43,243 --> 00:26:46,878
♪ After the stars are gone. ♪
624
00:26:46,913 --> 00:26:49,748
Mr. Burns, what are you
doing in this death hole?
625
00:26:49,783 --> 00:26:51,883
All I have left is my family mausoleum.
626
00:26:51,918 --> 00:26:53,852
Would you like a sip of grief soup?
627
00:26:53,887 --> 00:26:56,054
I stewed it from flowers left on graves.
628
00:26:56,089 --> 00:26:58,188
I confess, I went back
to work at the plant.
629
00:26:58,224 --> 00:27:00,290
Jay G seduced me with cobbler.
630
00:27:00,326 --> 00:27:03,461
But after the eighth pan,
it tasted like ashes.
631
00:27:03,496 --> 00:27:05,363
Ice cream got me through
three more pans,
632
00:27:05,398 --> 00:27:07,064
but after that, ashes.
633
00:27:07,099 --> 00:27:09,900
Well, now you have to
decide, once and for all,
634
00:27:09,935 --> 00:27:12,570
where your allegiance lies.
635
00:27:12,605 --> 00:27:15,071
I'm not going back to that job.
636
00:27:15,106 --> 00:27:17,907
I'm gonna stay here with you
and we're going to get even
637
00:27:17,942 --> 00:27:19,275
with Jay G.
638
00:27:19,310 --> 00:27:21,043
And as God is my witness,
639
00:27:21,079 --> 00:27:24,247
I will not tell my wife what I'm up to.
640
00:27:25,313 --> 00:27:26,625
Oh, that's good.
641
00:27:28,766 --> 00:27:30,132
Come on, Simpson.
642
00:27:30,157 --> 00:27:32,477
Give me more ideas to get back at Jay G.
643
00:27:32,548 --> 00:27:34,414
- Fill his office with balloons?
- Too soft.
644
00:27:34,449 --> 00:27:35,968
Fill his office with scorpions?
645
00:27:35,993 --> 00:27:38,249
Eh, I'm having a fight
with my scorpion guy.
646
00:27:38,290 --> 00:27:40,200
Oh, oh, oh. Banana in his tailpipe.
647
00:27:40,235 --> 00:27:41,701
I can't afford a banana!
648
00:27:42,971 --> 00:27:45,338
What's that? A spy! Grab him.
649
00:27:45,373 --> 00:27:46,739
Come here, spy.
650
00:27:46,774 --> 00:27:48,108
What are you doing here, boy?
651
00:27:48,143 --> 00:27:50,243
You're not dead. Are you?
652
00:27:50,278 --> 00:27:52,878
I followed you. I got suspicious
when you came home last night
653
00:27:52,914 --> 00:27:54,481
covered in grave dirt.
654
00:27:54,516 --> 00:27:56,483
Be gone, urchin. We have work to do.
655
00:27:56,518 --> 00:27:57,882
Wait, wait! He can help.
656
00:27:57,918 --> 00:28:00,885
No one's better at nasty
schemes than this kid.
657
00:28:00,921 --> 00:28:02,921
I mean, he's messed up.
658
00:28:02,956 --> 00:28:06,492
Look at him. You got to figure
his family life's a disaster.
659
00:28:06,527 --> 00:28:08,393
Why should I help Burns
now that he's broke?
660
00:28:08,429 --> 00:28:10,362
I've got more money than he does.
661
00:28:10,397 --> 00:28:12,431
Would the cape and gloves
662
00:28:12,466 --> 00:28:14,732
of the infamous Gaslight Strangler
663
00:28:14,767 --> 00:28:17,502
change your mind?
664
00:28:17,537 --> 00:28:19,903
If you want to take down a
rapper, you got to destroy
665
00:28:19,939 --> 00:28:23,407
the thing that's most
important to him: his rep.
666
00:28:23,443 --> 00:28:26,944
Rep means reputation.
667
00:28:26,979 --> 00:28:29,413
To do that, we got to go
to the ultimate expert
668
00:28:29,449 --> 00:28:31,381
on urban culture.
669
00:28:31,416 --> 00:28:32,982
A white nerd.
670
00:28:33,018 --> 00:28:35,385
So, in South Central
Springfield in the '90s,
671
00:28:35,420 --> 00:28:37,320
there were four major
hip-hop sub-scenes.
672
00:28:37,356 --> 00:28:39,956
The Good Time Mafia, Licorice Avenue,
673
00:28:39,991 --> 00:28:42,759
The Dirty, Dirty North, and The FLTA.
674
00:28:42,794 --> 00:28:44,494
The Fine Ladies Thug Army.
675
00:28:44,530 --> 00:28:46,329
Fascinating.
676
00:28:47,866 --> 00:28:49,131
Yes, yes. But do you have anything
677
00:28:49,167 --> 00:28:52,067
we can use against my
sworn enemy, Jay G?
678
00:28:52,102 --> 00:28:54,903
Before he was Jay G,
he was Jeremy Gilroy,
679
00:28:54,938 --> 00:28:57,373
a founding member of
The Five Boyfriends,
680
00:28:57,408 --> 00:28:58,974
a soulful R&B quintet.
681
00:28:59,009 --> 00:29:00,776
Hey, I know this guy.
682
00:29:00,811 --> 00:29:03,579
He tried to sell me a $55 candle!
683
00:29:03,614 --> 00:29:06,247
That's Jazzy James, the Lyrical Miracle.
684
00:29:06,283 --> 00:29:08,316
He wrote all of Jay's early hits.
685
00:29:08,351 --> 00:29:09,750
But they had a falling out,
686
00:29:09,786 --> 00:29:12,153
and he was never heard from again.
687
00:29:12,189 --> 00:29:14,322
Then only one man can write the rap
688
00:29:14,357 --> 00:29:17,392
that will ruin the rep of Jay G.
689
00:29:17,427 --> 00:29:18,959
Jazzy James.
690
00:29:18,995 --> 00:29:21,162
I told you this
guy would come back.
691
00:29:21,198 --> 00:29:22,563
Told you.
692
00:29:22,598 --> 00:29:25,265
Yeah, I used to be Jazzy James.
693
00:29:25,301 --> 00:29:27,067
The Lyrical Miracle?
694
00:29:27,102 --> 00:29:29,002
My skills were empirical.
695
00:29:29,037 --> 00:29:32,939
I wrote all the rhymes for Jay
G's first hip-hop record.
696
00:29:32,974 --> 00:29:36,610
I didn't get a dime, because I
signed over all the rights.
697
00:29:36,645 --> 00:29:37,811
Why'd you do that?
698
00:29:38,847 --> 00:29:39,812
All right, all right.
699
00:29:39,847 --> 00:29:41,080
I'll sign!
700
00:29:43,484 --> 00:29:45,851
He took my money, stole my girl,
701
00:29:45,886 --> 00:29:49,855
made me get a tattoo of the
baseball from Major League.
702
00:29:49,890 --> 00:29:51,624
It broke me. I fell hard,
703
00:29:51,659 --> 00:29:52,991
into scented candles.
704
00:29:54,829 --> 00:29:56,794
Quince.
705
00:29:56,830 --> 00:29:58,830
Listen, Jazzy. We're
gonna tear down Jay G
706
00:29:58,865 --> 00:30:00,798
with the ultimate revenge rap.
707
00:30:00,834 --> 00:30:02,033
And you're gonna write it.
708
00:30:02,068 --> 00:30:03,868
Oh...
709
00:30:04,904 --> 00:30:06,104
I'm in.
710
00:30:06,139 --> 00:30:07,606
Excellent.
711
00:30:07,641 --> 00:30:09,341
What is... rap?
712
00:30:09,376 --> 00:30:10,342
Hmm?
713
00:30:10,377 --> 00:30:11,743
Hmm.
714
00:30:11,778 --> 00:30:13,544
Quick, boy! Hide this thing.
715
00:30:16,882 --> 00:30:20,718
Homie, it's so sweet of you
to come visit me at my store.
716
00:30:20,753 --> 00:30:23,721
But aren't you gonna get in
trouble for missing work?
717
00:30:23,756 --> 00:30:26,390
You let me worry about
the nuclear plant.
718
00:30:26,425 --> 00:30:28,024
The important thing for you to do
719
00:30:28,060 --> 00:30:30,593
is believe I still work there.
720
00:30:30,629 --> 00:30:33,863
I can't wait to show you
the changes I've made.
721
00:30:33,898 --> 00:30:36,432
We're getting a lot of foot traffic.
722
00:30:36,468 --> 00:30:38,934
Three people used the
bathroom yesterday.
723
00:30:38,970 --> 00:30:40,936
How much should I charge
for these handbags
724
00:30:40,972 --> 00:30:43,640
made from the speaker
covers of old jukeboxes?
725
00:30:43,675 --> 00:30:45,642
Five dollars. No, no, no, no, no.
726
00:30:45,677 --> 00:30:48,109
A hundred dollars!
727
00:30:48,145 --> 00:30:50,679
It's happening. It's happening.
728
00:30:50,714 --> 00:30:53,282
I love my store!
729
00:30:53,317 --> 00:30:56,585
We're putting up new wallpaper.
730
00:30:58,955 --> 00:31:01,089
Is Mom gonna be okay?
731
00:31:01,124 --> 00:31:04,125
I don't know, son, I don't know.
732
00:31:04,161 --> 00:31:05,893
Oh, it's not her, fellas.
733
00:31:05,928 --> 00:31:08,396
It's the curse of the
adorable little store.
734
00:31:08,431 --> 00:31:10,798
Didn't always used to be like this.
No, no.
735
00:31:10,833 --> 00:31:13,267
Once, this land was
full of actual stores,
736
00:31:13,303 --> 00:31:15,135
as far as the eye could see.
737
00:31:15,171 --> 00:31:18,172
Then the rich people came. They
didn't need to make money,
738
00:31:18,207 --> 00:31:20,941
they just needed a place for
their friends to wander into,
739
00:31:20,976 --> 00:31:22,975
after spin class.
740
00:31:23,011 --> 00:31:24,577
Yeah, that's progress for you.
741
00:31:24,613 --> 00:31:26,346
I suppose.
742
00:31:26,381 --> 00:31:29,349
And so, with
Jazzy James on board,
743
00:31:29,384 --> 00:31:32,585
Mr. Burns set out to produce
the ultimate revenge rap.
744
00:31:33,822 --> 00:31:35,087
♪ Uh, listen up, suckers ♪
745
00:31:35,123 --> 00:31:36,856
♪ I'm-a say how I feel ♪
746
00:31:36,891 --> 00:31:39,858
♪ My dealings with Jay G have
been less than... ideal. ♪
747
00:31:39,893 --> 00:31:41,627
I...
748
00:31:41,662 --> 00:31:43,629
It's... It's no use. I've lost it.
749
00:31:43,664 --> 00:31:46,998
I need you to rap like
your world is ending.
750
00:31:47,034 --> 00:31:48,900
Like you just found out
that capital gains
751
00:31:48,936 --> 00:31:51,403
are going to be taxed at the
same rate as ordinary income.
752
00:31:51,439 --> 00:31:53,439
I need you to put your
entire soul into it.
753
00:31:53,474 --> 00:31:55,573
Now rhyme, Jazzy, rhyme!
754
00:31:55,608 --> 00:31:58,343
I got nothin'. Just take
me back to my candles.
755
00:31:58,378 --> 00:31:59,744
I need my quince!
756
00:31:59,779 --> 00:32:01,612
Wait, I have another idea.
757
00:32:01,648 --> 00:32:02,747
I'm feelin' it!
758
00:32:02,782 --> 00:32:04,248
I'm feelin' it!
759
00:32:04,283 --> 00:32:05,750
Now, almost drop me.
760
00:32:05,785 --> 00:32:07,618
Why does this work?
761
00:32:07,654 --> 00:32:09,320
♪ ♪
762
00:32:09,356 --> 00:32:10,822
♪ Jay, you're a rhyme thief ♪
763
00:32:10,857 --> 00:32:12,456
♪ A hip-hop perjurer ♪
764
00:32:12,491 --> 00:32:14,157
♪ If my words were beef patties ♪
765
00:32:14,192 --> 00:32:15,692
♪ You'd be the Hamburglar ♪
766
00:32:15,728 --> 00:32:17,394
♪ My beats are the freshest ♪
767
00:32:17,429 --> 00:32:18,862
♪ My beats are the freshest ♪
768
00:32:18,897 --> 00:32:20,664
♪ You reached out and stole 'em ♪
769
00:32:20,699 --> 00:32:22,198
♪ Like Gollum did precious ♪
770
00:32:22,234 --> 00:32:24,234
♪ Time for the truth to be paid off ♪
771
00:32:24,269 --> 00:32:26,002
♪ You're a lyrical Madoff ♪
772
00:32:26,037 --> 00:32:27,738
♪ So if you want to go to war, brah ♪
773
00:32:27,773 --> 00:32:29,339
♪ Hit me up and I'll
write the rap for ya. ♪
774
00:32:29,374 --> 00:32:30,339
Yeah!
775
00:32:30,375 --> 00:32:31,340
Whoa, it rhymed!
776
00:32:32,910 --> 00:32:34,209
Now that's what I call
777
00:32:34,245 --> 00:32:35,978
a corking revenge rap.
778
00:32:36,013 --> 00:32:38,481
If anyone's hungry, we've
set up a deli platter
779
00:32:38,516 --> 00:32:39,482
in the lobby.
780
00:32:39,517 --> 00:32:40,549
I'm hungry!
781
00:32:40,585 --> 00:32:42,050
For gettin' what's mine.
782
00:32:45,089 --> 00:32:48,390
Oh. Ain't no deli platter
ordered for a recording session
783
00:32:48,425 --> 00:32:50,726
that Praline doesn't hear about. Mm-mm.
784
00:32:50,751 --> 00:32:52,551
Praline? She's Jay G's ex-wife.
785
00:32:52,764 --> 00:32:54,163
I thought you were in prison.
786
00:32:54,188 --> 00:32:55,954
That's what the guards said,
787
00:32:56,086 --> 00:32:57,687
but I wasn't having that.
788
00:32:58,769 --> 00:32:59,901
Oh, we duckin' now?
789
00:32:59,936 --> 00:33:01,335
So that's how it is?
790
00:33:01,371 --> 00:33:02,637
I see.
791
00:33:02,672 --> 00:33:03,637
Oh, no, he didn't.
792
00:33:03,672 --> 00:33:04,738
No, he did not.
793
00:33:04,774 --> 00:33:06,206
- Shut up, Miata.
- Oh.
794
00:33:06,241 --> 00:33:07,841
Put that rare roast beef in a baggie.
795
00:33:07,877 --> 00:33:09,075
Mm-hmm, that one.
796
00:33:09,111 --> 00:33:12,746
So, Praline, are you
with us or against us?
797
00:33:12,782 --> 00:33:15,181
Jay G took everything from me.
798
00:33:15,217 --> 00:33:19,386
You best believe I'm going
to take everything from him.
799
00:33:19,422 --> 00:33:20,686
Get the ham!
800
00:33:20,722 --> 00:33:22,121
We're really glad to have you.
801
00:33:22,156 --> 00:33:23,122
Thanks for your help.
802
00:33:23,157 --> 00:33:24,424
Who you thankin'?
803
00:33:24,459 --> 00:33:26,426
I'm not doing this for
you, boo boo kitty.
804
00:33:26,461 --> 00:33:27,927
With an angry
ex-wife on our team,
805
00:33:27,962 --> 00:33:29,562
we were unstoppable.
806
00:33:29,597 --> 00:33:31,431
Praline brought in an all-star lineup
807
00:33:31,466 --> 00:33:33,365
of Jay G's enemies to lend their hatred
808
00:33:33,401 --> 00:33:35,902
to the world's greatest diss rap.
809
00:33:35,937 --> 00:33:39,905
RZA, Snoop and Common.
810
00:33:40,974 --> 00:33:44,443
♪ Yo, I want to back-smack Jay G, son ♪
811
00:33:44,478 --> 00:33:46,778
♪ He took that name Tang Clan from me ♪
812
00:33:46,814 --> 00:33:49,448
♪ And since there couldn't be two ♪
813
00:33:49,483 --> 00:33:51,883
♪ I had to change my Tang Clan to Wu ♪
814
00:33:51,919 --> 00:33:54,752
♪ I seen Jay G pimp, lie and rob ♪
815
00:33:54,787 --> 00:33:57,354
♪ Took my handyman off a job ♪
816
00:33:57,389 --> 00:33:58,689
♪ And when I complained ♪
817
00:33:58,724 --> 00:34:00,524
♪ All he did was laugh ♪
818
00:34:00,560 --> 00:34:03,561
♪ Now I got half a gazebo,
and not even the good half ♪
819
00:34:03,596 --> 00:34:05,763
♪ I would never wish
hate on my brother ♪
820
00:34:05,798 --> 00:34:08,365
♪ 'Cause we're all from the
same celestial mother ♪
821
00:34:08,400 --> 00:34:10,935
Wait, I just remembered
Jay crashed my Jet Ski.
822
00:34:10,970 --> 00:34:13,803
I hope he get food poisoning
from nachos. Peace!
823
00:34:13,839 --> 00:34:15,404
Yo, Common, that was tight.
824
00:34:15,440 --> 00:34:16,973
Respect, 'House.
825
00:34:18,643 --> 00:34:21,478
Oh, when this track drops,
some feelings gonna get hurt.
826
00:34:21,513 --> 00:34:22,979
Obliverated.
827
00:34:23,014 --> 00:34:26,382
Indeed. I just wish Smithers
and his ice were here
828
00:34:26,417 --> 00:34:27,917
to witness my revenge.
829
00:34:27,953 --> 00:34:29,985
Fight, fight, fight.
830
00:34:42,533 --> 00:34:43,765
Prepare for
831
00:34:43,801 --> 00:34:45,500
the turning of the worms.
832
00:34:45,535 --> 00:34:46,801
No offense, worms.
833
00:34:46,836 --> 00:34:51,171
I now drop "Choke on
Diss," aka "Rhyme Crime,"
834
00:34:51,207 --> 00:34:54,942
by Hate Squad, featuring
the Rhyme Crime All-Stars.
835
00:34:57,179 --> 00:34:58,779
Why isn't it dropping?
836
00:34:58,815 --> 00:35:00,548
Release the sounds!
837
00:35:01,410 --> 00:35:02,242
Damn!
838
00:35:03,451 --> 00:35:06,285
Sorry to crash your party
as a hologram, M.B.,
839
00:35:06,321 --> 00:35:08,755
but I'm having a little
celebration of my own.
840
00:35:08,790 --> 00:35:10,356
I just bought the master recording
841
00:35:10,392 --> 00:35:12,826
of your so-called diss rap.
842
00:35:12,861 --> 00:35:13,793
Ha, no way.
843
00:35:13,829 --> 00:35:15,461
Jazzy James and Hate Squad,
844
00:35:15,497 --> 00:35:17,330
featuring the Rhyme Crime
All-Stars hate you!
845
00:35:17,365 --> 00:35:18,832
They'd never sell out.
846
00:35:18,867 --> 00:35:19,999
They would...
847
00:35:20,034 --> 00:35:22,167
for money!
848
00:35:22,202 --> 00:35:23,435
Sorry, Monty.
849
00:35:23,470 --> 00:35:25,270
Jay G is the best producer in the world
850
00:35:25,305 --> 00:35:28,674
and you're a tone-deaf
pauper who lives in a grave.
851
00:35:28,709 --> 00:35:29,675
Ouch.
852
00:35:29,710 --> 00:35:32,044
I thought I hated him, but now I don't.
853
00:35:32,079 --> 00:35:33,846
So now I'm here.
854
00:35:33,881 --> 00:35:36,015
If you can't handle a
strong female hologram,
855
00:35:36,050 --> 00:35:37,248
that's on you.
856
00:35:37,283 --> 00:35:39,851
Jay G and D-O-double-G.
857
00:35:39,886 --> 00:35:40,985
We flipped the script.
858
00:35:41,021 --> 00:35:43,021
This ultimate betrayal
859
00:35:43,056 --> 00:35:44,889
is part of your spiritual journey.
860
00:35:44,925 --> 00:35:46,925
Lesson one: protect your neck.
861
00:35:46,960 --> 00:35:49,861
Say good-bye to your
revenge rap forever.
862
00:35:49,896 --> 00:35:51,495
'Cause it's about to drop.
863
00:35:53,399 --> 00:35:55,098
Mmm.
864
00:35:55,133 --> 00:35:57,000
Party at the power plant, y'all.
865
00:35:59,838 --> 00:36:02,005
I swear on the squid
beak of Lord Cthulhu
866
00:36:02,041 --> 00:36:03,807
and all his briny shoggoths,
867
00:36:03,842 --> 00:36:06,309
I will get revenge on you, Jay G.
868
00:36:06,344 --> 00:36:08,411
And so Mr. Burns beat on,
869
00:36:08,447 --> 00:36:10,243
fists against the hologram,
870
00:36:10,268 --> 00:36:13,602
punching back ceaselessly
into his own face.
871
00:36:16,611 --> 00:36:18,469
Which new name do you like better?
872
00:36:18,494 --> 00:36:20,180
Next Doorables...
873
00:36:20,205 --> 00:36:22,587
or the Lavender Zeppelin?
874
00:36:22,658 --> 00:36:24,457
I just don't know anymore.
875
00:36:25,560 --> 00:36:27,027
A customer!
876
00:36:27,062 --> 00:36:28,729
Oh, it's you.
877
00:36:28,764 --> 00:36:30,030
Baby, I'm sorry.
878
00:36:30,065 --> 00:36:31,932
I stayed loyal to Mr. Burns,
879
00:36:31,967 --> 00:36:34,034
coproduced a failed revenge rap,
880
00:36:34,069 --> 00:36:35,468
and now we've got nothing.
881
00:36:36,839 --> 00:36:39,439
I know it's crazy, but he needed me.
882
00:36:39,474 --> 00:36:41,273
Oh, it's okay, Homie.
883
00:36:41,308 --> 00:36:42,908
You're not mad?
884
00:36:42,944 --> 00:36:45,778
Your heart told you to stick with Mr.
Burns,
885
00:36:45,813 --> 00:36:47,780
and the thing I love about you most
886
00:36:47,815 --> 00:36:50,950
is you've got a heart
as big as The Ritz.
887
00:36:50,985 --> 00:36:54,453
Wow, Mom, you just made an F.
Scott Fitzgerald reference.
888
00:36:54,488 --> 00:36:57,922
Lisa, please, I did
graduate high school.
889
00:37:06,099 --> 00:37:10,969
I've just hatched a plan for
the most delicious revenge.
890
00:37:11,004 --> 00:37:12,737
Simpson, we must away.
891
00:37:12,773 --> 00:37:14,104
Did you want to buy that?
892
00:37:14,140 --> 00:37:15,773
Just looking.
893
00:37:15,808 --> 00:37:17,775
We can't afford the store anymore!
894
00:37:17,810 --> 00:37:19,143
Oh, thank God.
895
00:37:19,178 --> 00:37:21,011
Ha! I'm free!
896
00:37:23,215 --> 00:37:25,816
Well, before long, another aimless soul
897
00:37:25,851 --> 00:37:28,118
will open another adorable store here.
898
00:37:28,154 --> 00:37:31,520
And when they do, Old
Sam the Sign Hanger
899
00:37:31,555 --> 00:37:34,690
will be ready, with his
level and his ladder.
900
00:37:34,725 --> 00:37:36,959
Oh, why, here comes one now.
901
00:37:36,995 --> 00:37:39,095
Oh, honey, isn't it darling?
902
00:37:39,130 --> 00:37:40,096
Huh?
903
00:37:40,131 --> 00:37:42,131
We finally found the Bookmark Barn.
904
00:37:42,167 --> 00:37:44,733
Oh, this is Wicker Works.
905
00:37:44,769 --> 00:37:47,003
We're gonna sell so
many Yorkie sweaters.
906
00:37:47,038 --> 00:37:49,905
We can use the contractor
that did Karen's store.
907
00:37:49,940 --> 00:37:52,240
Mr. Burns' plan
was so horrifying,
908
00:37:52,276 --> 00:37:55,177
I could barely shut up
and go along with it.
909
00:37:55,212 --> 00:37:57,179
But I was the only friend
he had left in the world
910
00:37:57,214 --> 00:37:59,181
and he was whipping me so hard.
911
00:37:59,216 --> 00:38:01,616
Ow, ow!
912
00:38:01,651 --> 00:38:03,985
Oh, Goosius.
913
00:38:04,021 --> 00:38:06,653
Daddy's got your oatmeal.
914
00:38:06,689 --> 00:38:10,057
Golden raisins, just the
way you like 'em, baby.
915
00:38:15,298 --> 00:38:18,065
Goosey!
916
00:38:20,036 --> 00:38:22,368
Where's my goose?
917
00:38:22,403 --> 00:38:24,637
Why, he's right here.
918
00:38:24,672 --> 00:38:27,540
Fancy a bite of roast Goosius?
919
00:38:31,079 --> 00:38:32,411
You didn't!
920
00:38:32,447 --> 00:38:34,513
Oh, I did.
921
00:38:34,549 --> 00:38:37,183
Mmm. A trifle fatty,
but other than that,
922
00:38:37,219 --> 00:38:38,751
excellent.
923
00:38:38,786 --> 00:38:41,653
Damn, I didn't think you
had it in you, M.B.
924
00:38:41,688 --> 00:38:43,989
Oh, man.
925
00:38:44,024 --> 00:38:45,657
I don't want to live in a world
926
00:38:45,692 --> 00:38:49,094
without the mascot of my
multinational empire.
927
00:38:52,933 --> 00:38:54,233
Stop it!
928
00:38:54,268 --> 00:38:56,234
I saved your life, you stupid duck!
929
00:38:56,269 --> 00:38:59,636
Simpson, I told you to cook his goose.
930
00:38:59,672 --> 00:39:00,872
I couldn't do it.
931
00:39:00,907 --> 00:39:02,173
We just had our portrait done.
932
00:39:04,077 --> 00:39:05,910
Then, what did I eat?
933
00:39:05,945 --> 00:39:07,979
Roast goose from the gas station.
934
00:39:08,014 --> 00:39:10,047
Fine, then I'll kill it myself.
935
00:39:12,118 --> 00:39:14,684
The two rivals found
themselves doomed by the lusts
936
00:39:14,719 --> 00:39:16,753
that drive all men... money, power,
937
00:39:16,788 --> 00:39:19,689
and the pursuit of a goose.
938
00:39:24,596 --> 00:39:27,697
Damn it, Monty, I don't want to die.
939
00:39:27,732 --> 00:39:29,299
Well, if we have to end this way,
940
00:39:29,334 --> 00:39:31,233
at least it's of natural causes.
941
00:39:31,269 --> 00:39:33,702
A business deal gone wrong.
942
00:39:36,974 --> 00:39:38,073
Tell me, Jay.
943
00:39:38,109 --> 00:39:39,308
Why'd you betray me?
944
00:39:39,343 --> 00:39:40,943
We were kindred souls.
945
00:39:40,978 --> 00:39:42,311
Brothers in avarice.
946
00:39:42,346 --> 00:39:45,314
Why? Because you told me to!
947
00:39:45,349 --> 00:39:47,315
In your own last chapter.
948
00:39:50,486 --> 00:39:52,954
"You will never be truly ruthless
949
00:39:52,989 --> 00:39:55,089
until you destroy the one who made you."
950
00:39:55,125 --> 00:39:57,191
I had to tear you down, M.B.!
951
00:39:57,227 --> 00:39:59,860
It was the final rung.
952
00:40:03,733 --> 00:40:05,698
I just wanted to be ruthless,
953
00:40:05,734 --> 00:40:07,134
like you.
954
00:40:12,041 --> 00:40:15,175
That I inspired you to
such pure and evil greed,
955
00:40:15,210 --> 00:40:17,044
that is my greatest triumph.
956
00:40:17,079 --> 00:40:19,146
I am truly immortal.
957
00:40:19,181 --> 00:40:20,814
We're about to die, fool.
958
00:40:30,191 --> 00:40:33,525
Smithers, I ordered ice, not slush.
959
00:40:33,561 --> 00:40:35,161
Sorry I'm late, sir.
960
00:40:35,196 --> 00:40:36,329
A few of these French Canadian bikers
961
00:40:36,364 --> 00:40:37,729
got delayed at the border.
962
00:40:37,765 --> 00:40:40,165
Apparently, I'm their leader now.
963
00:40:40,200 --> 00:40:43,201
Smithers, Smithers, Smithers!
964
00:40:45,538 --> 00:40:47,172
Ow. That stings.
965
00:40:47,207 --> 00:40:48,906
Oh, that one's nice.
966
00:40:48,942 --> 00:40:50,508
How dare you.
967
00:40:50,543 --> 00:40:51,843
Fascinating.
968
00:40:51,878 --> 00:40:53,011
Excellent.
969
00:40:53,046 --> 00:40:54,879
Mr. Burns realized
970
00:40:54,914 --> 00:40:56,513
that his ruthless will to power
971
00:40:56,548 --> 00:41:00,250
would beat on forever
in another man's heart.
972
00:41:03,022 --> 00:41:05,822
Ah, I guess this summer's really over.
973
00:41:05,858 --> 00:41:09,860
I'm gonna miss Goosius.
974
00:41:09,895 --> 00:41:11,862
Aah!
975
00:41:11,897 --> 00:41:13,396
Thanks, boy.
976
00:41:13,431 --> 00:41:15,898
Do you think Mr. Burns learned
anything from all this?
977
00:41:15,933 --> 00:41:17,900
Could it have changed
him for the better?
978
00:41:17,935 --> 00:41:19,202
You know what?
979
00:41:19,237 --> 00:41:21,304
I have a feeling it did.
980
00:41:22,907 --> 00:41:24,340
Attention.
981
00:41:24,376 --> 00:41:26,075
For the sheer joy of it,
982
00:41:26,111 --> 00:41:29,577
every day will now include a
moment of musical appreciation.
983
00:41:29,613 --> 00:41:31,946
Yeah! ♪ Music makes the whole world ♪
984
00:41:31,982 --> 00:41:33,948
♪ Whole world ♪
985
00:41:33,984 --> 00:41:37,085
Mm, let's not do this tomorrow.
986
00:41:37,121 --> 00:41:39,888
♪ Oh ♪
987
00:41:39,923 --> 00:41:42,457
♪ Go round, hey ♪
988
00:41:42,493 --> 00:41:45,060
♪ Ah-ah-ha. ♪
989
00:41:45,119 --> 00:41:49,491
- sync and corrections by Mr.C -
- www.addic7ed.com -
990
00:42:25,132 --> 00:42:26,331
Shh!
70671
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