All language subtitles for My.Boyfriends.Dog.2015.HDRip.XviD.AC3-EVO

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LET'S GO THIS WAY.

OH, NO!

NO, NO.

OH, PLEASE?

WE'RE CLOSED.

HEY, HEY, HEY,
WHAT, ARE YOU KIDDING?

FOR HEAVEN'S SAKES,
LET THAT GIRL IN.

HERE YOU GO, SWEETHEART.

OH, MY GOODNESS.
OH, MY GOODNESS!

THANK YOU SO MUCH.

OH, LOOK AT YOU.

OH, MY GOODNESS.

-STAY.
-OH, THERE YOU GO.

OH, YOU'RE WET, TOO.
OH, DEAR.

THANK YOU SO MUCH.

YOU'RE WELCOME,
SWEETHEART.

ARE DOGS EVEN
ALLOWED IN HERE?

NO.

WELL, TECHNICALLY, NO,
BUT SINCE IT'S AFTER
HOURS...

AND, SO...
YOU LOOK--

LIKE SOMEONE
LOST A GROOM.

IT'S KIND OF
THE OTHER WAY AROUND.

DO YOU MIND IF I SIT DOWN?

KITCHEN'S CLOSED.

YEAH, YEAH, YEAH,
BUT THE TABLES,

THEY ARE STILL OPEN.

OH, HONEY, YOU ARE
JUST A MESS.

I'M SO SORRY TO SAY IT,
BUT YOU ARE A MESS.

I'LL BET THERE IS JUST
ONE HECK OF A STORY

TO EXPLAIN ALL OF THIS.

THERE BETTER BE.

I DON'T RE-OPEN THIS
PLACE FOR ANYBODY.

OH... [SCOFFS]

DON'T YOU WORRY
ABOUT HIM.

HE IS ALL BARK, BUT NO BITE.

IT ALL HAPPENED SO FAST.

YOU KNOW, I WAS WALKING
DOWN THE AISLE ONE MINUTE,

AND THE NEXT...

LOUIE, HEY, HEY, HEY.

WHAT?

BABE, COME,
SIT, SIT, SIT.

I THINK THIS IS
GONNA TAKE A WHILE.

OH, SWEETHEART.

WHAT'S YOUR NAME, KIDDO?

BAILEY.

BAILEY DALEY.

MUSICAL.

YEAH.
AND THIS IS ADAM, AND EVE

AND SHIRLEY.

[LAUGHS]
YOU'RE KIDDING. SHIRLEY?

SHIRLEY.

WELL, HELLO, SHIRLEY.

HELLO, SWEETHEART.

ALL RIGHT, BABY GIRL,

NOW, YOU START
AT THE VERY BEGINNING.

AND DON'T LEAVE OUT
ONE SINGLE THING.

[LAUGHS]

OKAY. UH...

I GUESS IT ALL STARTED

THE FIRST DAY I MOVED INTO
MY NEW HOUSE...

[♪♪♪]

I'D LOVED THE PLACE
FOREVER,

IT WAS MY LITTLE DREAM
HOUSE.

AND I SAVED UP MY MONEY
FOR YEARS AND YEARS,

JUST VOWING THAT
IF IT EVER CAME ON THE
MARKET,

I WOULD BUY IT,

AND, AT LONG LAST, I DID.

HONEY, I'M
SO PROUD OF YOU.

YOU HUNG IN THERE,
YOU STUCK IT OUT,

AND LOOK AT THIS,
YOU MADE IT.

WELL, IT DIDN'T HURT
THAT YOU CO-SIGNED ON THE
LOAN.

YOU KNOW WHO WOULD'VE
LOVED THIS PLACE?

-WHO?
-HOWIE.

OH, HOWIE.
BEAGLE EXTRAORDINAIRE.

YOU KNOW WHAT
I'M THINKING, SWEETIE.

MAYBE IT'S TIME
YOU GET A NEW DOG.

I MEAN, THIS IS THE LONGEST

YOU'VE EVER BEEN
WITHOUT ONE.

TOO SOON.

WHEN IT'S TIME,
I'LL KNOW.

AM I BEING A BABY?

WHY, BECAUSE YOU DON'T WANT
TO SPEND YOUR FIRST NIGHT

ALL ALONE IN YOUR NEW HOUSE,
WITH ONLY THE STRANGE
NOISES?

MAYBE.

OH, BALES,

A "TOTAL BABY"
DOESN'T BUY A HOUSE

ALL ON HER OWN,

TO LIVE IN AND TAKE CARE OF
ALL BY HERSELF.

SEE, THAT'S THE THING.

IT'S A GREAT HOUSE,

BUT I'M REALIZING
IT'S A HOME FOR TWO.

MEANING?

MEANING I HAVE
A JOB THAT I LOVE--

YES, YOUR STUDENTS ARE
CRAZY ABOUT YOU.

SO ARE YOURS.

NOBODY'S CRAZY
ABOUT THEIR FRENCH TEACHER,

EXCEPT FOR MAYBE THE FRENCH.

[LAUGHS]

I HAVE A GREAT MOM,

I HAVE AN AWESOME BFF,

GREAT NEW HOUSE....

THE ONLY THING
THAT'S MISSING IS--

A DOG, YES,

BUT LIKE YOU SAID,

YOU'LL KNOW
WHEN YOU'RE READY.

A MAN!

I'M TALKING ABOUT A MAN.

OH, ONE OF THOSE.

YEAH.

DO YOU KNOW,

THAT BETWEEN WORK,
HOWIE PASSING,

AND BUYING A HOUSE,

I HAVEN'T DATED ANYONE
SINCE RYAN?

THAT WAS AGES AGO.

I KNOW.

OKAY, YOU NEED TO GO
AND GET BOY-CRAZY.

NO, I DON'T.

I NEED TO FIND MY GUY,
MY PARTNER IN CRIME, YOU
KNOW?

AW...

THERE'S THE BAILEY DALEY
WE ALL KNOW AND LOVE.

[SCHOOL BELL RINGING]

THE NEXT BOOK
WE'RE GOING TO READ

IS ONE OF MY ALL-TIME
FAVORITES,

EMILY BRONTE'S
"WUTHERING HEIGHTS."

[CLASS GROANING]

NO, NO, NO, NO,
IT'S A VERY GOOD BOOK.

BUT IT'S REALLY SAD, ISN'T
IT?

IN A WAY,

BUT IT ALSO CONTAINS

ONE OF LITERATURE'S
MOST PASSIONATE

AND THRILLING ROMANCES.

HOW THRILLING CAN IT BE?

IT TAKES PLACE, LIKE,
A THOUSAND YEARS AGO!

MORE LIKE 200.

BUT IT'S NOT "WHEN"
THAT MATTERS,

IT'S THE STORY
THAT'S TIMELESS,

AND WHAT MAKES IT
SO THRILLING.

CATHY AND HEATHCLIFF HAVE
A ONCE-IN-A-LIFETIME LOVE

AND IT'S WHAT WE ALL ASPIRE
TO.

EXCEPT FOR THE PART
WHERE IT DESTROYS THEM

AND EVERYONE THEY KNOW.

OH, SOUNDS LIKE
MY LAST THREE GIRLFRIENDS.

AS THE GREAT POET
ALFRED LORD TENNYSON ONCE
WROTE,

"'TIS BETTER
TO HAVE LOVED AND LOST

THAN NEVER TO HAVE LOVED
AT ALL."

DO YOU REALLY BELIEVE
THAT, MISS DALEY?

YES, I DO.

WHAT WAS HIS NAME?

HOWIE.

ONLY THE BEST BEAGLE EVER.

[CHUCKLING]

SO...

EMILY BRONTE'S
"WUTHERING HEIGHTS."

OKAY, LASAGNA COULDN'T
ALL OF A SUDDEN

HAVE LESS CALORIES THAN
BAKED CHICKEN, COULD IT?

YEAH, NOT
ON THIS PLANET.

EARTH?

YEAH, THAT ONE.

MM...

BUMMER.

[SIGHING]

THANK YOU.

YOU LADIES COME HERE OFTEN?

NOT OFTEN ENOUGH,
APPARENTLY.

TRANSLATION--
ARE YOU NEW HERE?

WADE INGRAM,
SUBSTITUTE GYM TEACHER.

JUST FILLING IN
FOR TERRY JANSSEN

WHILE HE RECOVERS
FROM BACK SURGERY.

AND YOU ARE...?

UH, BAILEY DALEY.

POETRY?

ENGLISH.

COMP AND LIT.

AND THIS IS AMBER.

FRENCH.

I TEACH FRENCH,

I'M NOT FRENCH.

[CHUCKLING]

I GOT IT.

CHICKEN?

UH... BRAVE, ACTUALLY,
KIND OF.

I'M SOMEWHAT DARING
OCCASIONALLY.

I WAS TALKING ABOUT YOUR
MEAL,
BUT, YOU KNOW.

I, TOO, LIKE TO
ROLL THE DICE

EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE.

GOOD.

[CELL PHONE CHIMES]

EXCUSE ME.

OH...

I'M SORRY, IT'S MY DAD,

IT'S KIND OF A FANTASY
FOOTBALL LEAGUE CRISIS.

I SHOULD PROBABLY
GET GOING,

BUT I HOPE TO SEE YOU TWO
AROUND MORE OFTEN.

MAYBE GRAB A REAL MEAL
SOMETIME.

OH. OKAY.

ALL RIGHT.

ASK AND YOU SHALL RECEIVE.

YEAH.

[CHUCKLING]

SO, WHAT EXACTLY DOES
"SHARE A REAL MEAL" MEAN?

I THINK IT MEANS
HE WANTS TO TAKE ME OUT,

DON'T YOU THINK?

YEAH, THEN WHY DIDN'T HE
JUST ASK YOU OUT?

I DON'T KNOW, MOM,
WE JUST MET.

I COULD ASK HIM OUT
IF I WANTED TO, RIGHT?

YEAH, WELL, IF YOU WANT
TO PLAY IT THAT WAY.

AND BY THE WAY,
IF I RECALL CORRECTLY,

YOU ASKED DADDY OUT
FOR THE FIRST TIME, DIDN'T
YOU?

OH, YOUR SWEET FATHER,

SWEET, SHY FATHER,

GOD REST HIS SOUL.

YEAH, IF I DIDN'T MAKE
THE FIRST MOVE,

WE NEVER WOULD'VE
GOTTEN TOGETHER.

WELL, LUCKY FOR ME
YOU DID.

BE THAT AS IT MAY,

THIS WADE FELLOW,
FROM WHAT YOU TELL ME,

WILL DEFINITELY LET YOU KNOW
IF HE IS INTERESTED.

NOW, CHECK OUT THIS TABLE.

DEFINITELY
WORTH 75 CENTS.

WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT?

THIS IS A DIAMOND
IN THE ROUGH.

I SEE THE "ROUGH" PART.

[SIGHS IN FRUSTRATION]

GRAB ONE END.

OKAY, GOING THIS WAY?

-YES.
-OKAY.

[AMBER]: YOU'RE WORKING?

BUT IT'S SUNDAY FUN-DAY.

I KNOW IT'S SUNDAY FUN-DAY,

BUT IF I DON'T FINISH
GRADING THESE PAPERS,

I'M JUST GOING TO GET
BEHIND,

AND THEN I CAN'T HANG OUT
NEXT WEEKEND.

NO!

BALES, WHAT'S THE MATTER?

I LEFT HALF THE TESTS
AT SCHOOL.

I'M GOING TO CALL YOU BACK.

GOTTA GO.

HMM.

WHO'S GOING TO BE THERE
ON A SUNDAY?

[BARKING]

HI, BUDDY! HI!

OH, MY GOODNESS!
OKAY.

HI, BUDDY!

OH, AREN'T YOU
THE SWEETEST BOY EVER?

AREN'T YOU? HI...

-OOH...
-ADAM.

HI.

HE NEVER COULD MEET
A PRETTY WOMAN HE COULD
RESIST.

OH, OKAY.

THIS IS YOUR DOG?

YEAH, CAN'T YOU TELL

BY THE WAY THAT HE LIKES ME
MORE THAN YOU?

OH, DON'T WORRY, I HAVE
THIS EFFECT ON ANIMALS.

YOU KNOW, HUMANS NOT SO
MUCH.

OH, I DOUBT THAT.

SO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING
HERE ON A SUNDAY?

JUST RUNNING
SOME TRACK WITH ADAM.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE
ON A SUNDAY?

I'M JUST GETTING
THESE PAPERS THAT HE'S...

YEAH, THEY'RE
MY TEST PAPERS HERE.

-YEAH, I'M SORRY ABOUT THAT.
-THAT'S OKAY.

COME ON, ADAM.
COME ON.

LET'S NOT PEE
ON THE TEST PAPERS.

OKAY... OH, WOW.

[LAUGHING]
HERE YOU GO.

THANK YOU.

WELL, I, UH...

I GUESS I'D BETTER RUN,
AND YOU'D BETTER...

RUN.

MAYBE YOU SHOULD JOIN ME
FOR A RUN SOMETIME.

OKAY.

BEFORE OR AFTER
THE "REAL MEAL"?

BEFORE.

THAT WAY WE CAN WORK UP
A REAL APPETITE.

WHEN?

UH, SOON?

LIKE, REAL SOON.

OKAY.

I WILL...

SEE YOU SOON.

OKAY.

ADAM, COME HERE!

[WHISTLING TO DOG]

BYE, ADAM.

YOU CAN'T GO HOME WITH HER.
COME
HERE.

COME HERE.

ATTA BOY.

COME HERE.

I KNOW, IT'S GREAT.

BUT YOU DON'T EVEN JOG.

I MEAN, I DON'T EVEN THINK
I'VE EVER SEEN YOU WALK
FAST.

OKAY, I'M GOING TO
BE FINE.

I WILL DO SOME STRETCHING,

I'LL GET HOPPED UP
ON COFFEE...

MM-HMM.

I'LL PRETEND I'M A DOG,
AFTER A FRISBEE.

OH, THAT'S ATTRACTIVE.

YEAH. YOU KNOW.

DO YOU EVEN HAVE
ANYTHING TO WEAR?

AH-HAH.

PERFECT TIME
TO GO SHOPPING.

CUTE.

FIRST THINGS FIRST.

LET'S SEE WHAT YOU GOT.

COME ON. COME ON.

COME ON, COME ON.
PICK IT UP.

[YELPS, LAUGHING]

[GASPS WEARILY]

[LAUGHING]

[GASPING FOR AIR]

-YOU OKAY?
-YEAH.

YEAH?

I'M ALL RIGHT.

YEAH? NEED SOME SPACE.

[GROANING]

HAS ANYONE TOLD YOU
HOW BEAUTIFUL YOU ARE

WHEN YOU'RE EXHAUSTED?

I MUST NEVER HAVE BEEN
MORE BEAUTIFUL IN MY LIFE.

SO, WHAT DOES
BAILEY DALEY DO

WHEN SHE'S NOT
ENLIGHTENING

THE YOUNG MINDS
OF OUR TIMES?

[CHUCKLES]

UM... WELL...

SHE LIKES TO COOK ITALIAN,

AND READ BOOKS,
AND WATCH SAPPY MOVIES,

AND HANG OUT
WITH HER FRIEND, AMBER.

THE ONE WHO'S NOT FROM
FRANCE.

MM-HMM.

AND GO TO GARAGE SALES
WITH HER MOM,

WHO'S REALLY COOL.

SERIOUS? GARAGE SALES?

MM-HMM.

MAN, I LOVE GARAGE SALES.

I JUST PICKED UP
THIS ISIAH THOMAS B-BALL.

I GOT IT FOR EIGHT BUCKS.

I WENT ONLINE, FOUND
THE SAME THING FOR 150.

CAN YOU PUT IT UP FOR
SAVINGS?

[LAUGHS]

YOU REALLY NEED TO MEET
MY MOTHER.

I'D LOVE TO.

WHEN?

SOON.

DEAL.

HERE IT IS.

SO, THE LATEST
AND GREATEST?

MM-HMM.

WOW...
THIS ONE'S A BEAUTY.

I MEAN, LOOK AT
THE DETAIL ON THESE LEGS.

I KNOW, RIGHT?

SHE'S A REAL DIAMOND
IN THE ROUGH.

GUESS HOW MUCH
SHE PAID FOR IT.

25?

12.

-WHAT?
-YEAH.

-SWEET!
-I KNOW.

SHE'S GOT THE EYE.

HEY, LISTEN,

IF YOU EVER NEED
THIS THING REFINISHED,

I'M PRETTY GOOD
WITH A SANDER.

OKAY, GOOD TO KNOW.

IS THERE ANYTHING YOU CAN'T
DO?

I KNOW, LOOK, YOU GOT
THIS WOMAN RUNNING.

THAT IS AN ACCOMPLISHMENT
IN ITSELF.

WELL, SHE HELD UP
LIKE A CHAMP.

THEN,

SHE CHOWED DOWN
LIKE A PRO.

AH.

THAT'S MY KINDA GAL.

[CHUCKLES]

OH, LOOK AT YOU!

OH, ADAM, YOU ARE
SUCH A GOOD KISSER!

TAUGHT HIM
EVERYTHING I KNOW.

I BET YOU DID.

[CHUCKLING]

MORNING, LADIES.

AREN'T YOU THE PICTURE
OF PERFECTION THIS MORNING.

HEY, DID YOU DO
SOMETHING WITH YOUR HAIR?

YEAH, WASHED IT.

YEAH, SHAMPOO, IT'S
AN AMAZING INVENTION.

SHAMPOO, THAT'S FUNNY.

MM-HMM.

SHE'S FUNNY.

HEY, LISTEN, I'M DOING THIS
5K CHARITY RUN THIS WEEKEND.

I WAS WONDERING
IF YOU WANT TO JOIN ME.

SURE, SIGN ME UP.

YEAH?

YEAH.

HAVE I TOLD YOU
YOU'RE THE BEST?

MAYBE. THANK YOU.

BYE.

BYE.

BE STILL
MY BEATING HEART.

HE'S KINDA FLIRTY,
ISN'T HE?

NO, HE'S JUST NICE.

HE COMPLIMENTS.
HE'S SWEET.

HMM, ARE YOU SURE
ABOUT THIS 5K RACE?

YOU KNOW THAT'S LIKE
FOUR MORE KS THAN ONE.

IT'S LIKE THREE MILES.

AND NOBODY ACTUALLY
RACES AT THESE THINGS.

IT'S FOR CHARITY.

[♪♪♪]

ARE WE LOSING?

OH, YEAH.

BUT DON'T WORRY,
IT'S JUST FOR FUN.

OKAY.

WHOA, HEY!

WHAT'S GOING ON?

WHY ARE YOU STOPPING?

IT'S JUST FOR FUN,

JUST FOR FUN...

WELL, YEAH, I MEAN,
BUT IF WE COMPLETELY STOP,

THEN WE HAVE NO CHANCE
OF WINNING AT ALL.

YEAH?

OKAY.

-GO?
-HIT IT!

YEAH!

YOU GOT THIS.

OKAY.

[♪♪♪]

TALK ABOUT
AN UPHILL BATTLE.

YEAH, IT'S JUST FOR
THIS LITTLE STRETCH.

YOU'RE DOING GREAT.

I'M DOING GREAT.

YEAH, YOU ARE.

[SIGHING] OKAY.

OH!

[WINCING]

WADE!

YEAH?

WADE!

WHAT?

I HOPE I DIDN'T
RUIN THE RACE FOR YOU.

OH, NO. NO, I MEAN,
NO WORRIES,

AS LONG AS YOU'RE OKAY.

ARE YOU?
ARE YOU OKAY?

I THINK SO.

OKAY, THIS SHOULD BE GOOD.

DO YOU WANT TO TRY STANDING?

OKAY.

GOOD.

YAY!

[LAUGHING]

YOU SHOULD BE FINE,

JUST GO EASY ON IT
FOR A WHILE.

OKAY.

RIGHT ON.

SO, YOU WANNA FINISH THE
RACE?

I'M JUST KIDDING.

BUT, SERIOUSLY,
YOU MIND IF I FINISH IT?

OH.

OKAY.

UM...

YEAH, I'LL BE... HERE.

MEET ME BACK HERE?

YEAH.

YEAH, UM...

I'LL BE HERE.

YOU'RE THE BEST.

THANKS.

AND YOU...

YOU'RE A LIFE SAVER.

THANKS, UM, BUT, UH,
I'M JUST DOING MY JOB.

YEAH, YOU WERE.

[GIGGLES]

UM...

YOU SURE
YOU'RE ALL RIGHT?

YEAH, I'M TOTALLY FINE.

I'M JUST SORRY I COULDN'T
RUN THAT LAST "K."

YOU'RE A GOOD SPORT,
YOU KNOW THAT?

SO, LISTEN,

I'VE KIND OF GOT
A HUGE FAVOR TO ASK YOU.

I'VE GOT TO GO AWAY
THIS WEEKEND

FOR THIS
BACHELOR PARTY THING--

WAIT, THIS WEEKEND?

YEAH, I KNOW, RIGHT?

WE PLANNED TO DRIVE
TO THE BEACH.

I TOTALLY SPACED
ON THE VEGAS THING.

ANYHOW, I WAS JUST
WONDERING,

MAYBE YOU COULD
WATCH ADAM FOR ME?

HMM?

YOU KNOW ADAM'S
AS CRAZY ABOUT YOU

AS I AM, RIGHT?

YOU KNOW, YOU CAN SAY "NO"
ONCE IN A WHILE.

IT MAKES THE "YES"'S
ALL THAT MUCH SWEETER.

SAY "NO" TO WHAT?

I JUST, I THINK

YOU DON'T NEED
TO TRY SO HARD.

I MEAN, AFTER ALL,

IT DIDN'T STOP WADE
FROM LEAVING YOU BEHIND,

WITH A BUM ANKLE,
AND A DOG.

[GASPING IN DELIGHT]

WHAT?

DOG ADOPTIONS!

NO. PUPPIES?

PUPPIES!

ADAM, WE'RE GOING TO
GO LOOK AT PUPPIES.

LET'S GO
SEE THE PUPPIES!

THIS WAY, COME ON.

LET'S GO.
GO, GO. COME ON.

LET'S GO SEE
WHAT THEY'VE GOT.

[GASPING IN DELIGHT]

OH, MY GOODNESS.

OH, MY GOODNESS,
LOOK AT THIS.

LOOK AT THIS.
HELLO.

HI!

OH, MY GOODNESS.

HI!

[SQUEALING IN DELIGHT]

HELLO!
AREN'T YOU PRETTY?

OH, LOOK AT
THEIR LITTLE FACES.

I KNOW,
LOOK AT THEM ALL.

I WANT EVERY
SINGLE ONE OF THEM.

I WANT TO TAKE YOU
ALL HOME WITH ME.

SORRY,

IT'S ONE DOG
PER PARENT.

OH, I'M JUST FANTASIZING.

BY THE WAY, I'M COLE.

WELCOME TO
MY HUMBLE ESTABLISHMENT.

I'M BAILEY.

AREN'T YOU
A HANDSOME DEVIL?

OH, YEAH.

WHAT'S YOUR DOG'S NAME?

OH, UH, THIS IS ADAM.

HE'S ACTUALLY
MY BOYFRIEND'S DOG.

IS ADAM IN THE MARKET
FOR A BROTHER OR SISTER?

YES.

YOU KNOW...

YEAH, MAYBE, NOT RIGHT NOW.

WELL, WHEN YOU'RE--
ADAM'S READY--

COME ON BACK.

DOG ADOPTIONS
ARE EVERY SATURDAY.

OKAY.

I WON'T BE ABLE TO HELP IT.

THANKS FOR COMING IN.

YOU BET.
NICE TO MEET YOU.

YOU TOO.

LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.

OKAY...

[CHUCKLING]

[SIGHING]

OH, YOU'LL BE BACK.

MOM, I HAVE A BOYFRIEND.

WHAT?

I'M TALKING ABOUT
TO ADOPT A DOG

WHEN THE TIME
IS RIGHT.

YUP, I WILL BE BACK
TO ADOPT A DOG

WHEN THE TIME IS RIGHT.

[CHUCKLING]

[CLEARS THROAT
AND SIGHS]

OH, YOU WANT SOME?

[CHUCKLING]

YOU MISS YOUR DAD, HUH?

WELL, I CAN'T SAY
I BLAME YOU.

I JUST HOPE HE MISSES US.

MM-HMM.

YOU KNOW, I HAVE
AN OBSERVATION TO MAKE

ABOUT YOUR DAD.

ON THE ONE HAND,
HE'S SWEET, AND HE'S FUN,

AND HE'S ADORABLE.

ON THE OTHER,

EVEN WHEN IT SEEMS LIKE
HE'S PAYING ATTENTION,

HE'S NOT.

IT'S LIKE HE'S WAITING
FOR SOMEONE ELSE TO SHOW UP.

I KNOW.

AS LONG AS THERE'S
FOOD IN YOUR BOWL,

WHO CARES, HUH?

THANK YOU.

MORNING, BEAUTIFUL.

YOU'RE BACK, I SEE.

SORRY I DIDN'T
RETURN YOUR, UH--

WELL, ADAM'S TEXT.

UH, "TEXTS." PLURAL.

YEAH, LISTEN, IT WAS
AN INSANE WEEKEND.

I MEAN, TOTALLY CRAZY.

OKAY?

YOU'RE REALLY COOKING
IN THOSE HEELS.

LOOK, I MISSED YOU SO MUCH.

HOW'S MY BOY?

HE'S GOOD.
WE HAD A GREAT WEEKEND.

AND...

I MISSED YOU, TOO.

I SO WANT TO KISS YOU
RIGHT NOW.

BUT WE'RE AT SCHOOL.

SAVE IT FOR SATURDAY.

THE PARTY
I TOLD YOU ABOUT?

-RIGHT.
-OKAY.

YEAH.

NO, GOOD THINGS COME
TO THOSE WHO WAIT, RIGHT?

MM-HMM.

JUST...

[CHUCKLES]

[LAUGHING]

OH, THIS IS A GREAT SONG.
COME ON, WE'VE GOT TO DANCE.

OH, I THINK MAYBE NOT.

MY ANKLE IS STILL
A LITTLE WEIRD.

BABE, IT'S BEEN TWO WEEKS.

YOU KNOW,
OLD SPORTS INJURIES.

YEAH, I KNOW, I KNOW,
BUT YOU'VE GOTTA BARREL PAST
IT.

YOU'VE GOT TO PUSH THOUGH,
YOU'VE GOT TO BE A WINNER.

I'M A WINNER.
OKAY, LET'S DANCE!

COME ON!

[LAUGHING]

COME ON.

SHOW ME HOW IT'S DONE.

[LAUGHING]

OKAY, HERE WE GO.
ALRIGHT.

[LAUGHING]

I'M GOING TO
TRY AND SPIN YOU.

OKAY.

OH!

WHOA.

[WINCING]

YOU OKAY?

OH, NOT REALLY.

WHAT HAPPENED?

I GUESS IT'S JUST
STILL WEAK.

CAN YOU-- ?
YEAH, THANK YOU.

YEAH, I'M SORRY.

[WINCING]

OH, MY--

THERE WE GO.

ANYTHING I CAN DO?

UH...

OR SAY?

YEAH. YEAH, SEE IF
THEY HAVE ANY ICE MAYBE?

YEAH. YEAH...

OKAY.

STAY RIGHT HERE.

[CHUCKLES]

OKAY, I'LL BE HERE.

OKAY, I'LL BE
RIGHT BACK.

OKAY.

[SIGHS]

HI.

[GIGGLING] HI.

HOW YOU DOING?

I'M WELL.
HOW ARE YOU?

I WAS LOOKING
FOR SOME ICE.

[CHATTING]

SO, SEATTLE, HUH?

I HEARD IT'S PRETTY RAD
THERE,
ACTUALLY.

I KNOW,
IT'S FREEZING,

BUT MY GIRLFRIEND OPENED UP
A NEW DANCE STUDIO,

SO I FIGURED, I WANT TO
HELP HER OUT, YOU KNOW?

BESIDES, I HAVEN'T REALLY
MET ANYONE SPECIAL

TO KEEP ME
AROUND HERE--

WADE...

BALES, HEY.

AND SUSIE.

UH, BAILEY, SUSIE.
SUSIE, BAILEY.

SERIOUSLY?

I'M WAITING FOR YOU
AND THIS IS WHAT YOU'RE
DOING?

YOU'RE FLIRTING WITH
"RUNNER-UP" OVER HERE?

UH, I SHOULD GO.

YEAH, SORRY,
YOU SHOULD GO.

WE WERE JUST TALKING.

YOU'RE SO OVERREACTING ON
THIS.

I'M NOT OVERREACTING.

YOU FLIRT WITH EVERYONE.

YOU THINK I DIDN'T
NOTICE THAT, BUT I DID.

AMBER.

AND THAT NURSE AT THE 5K,
YOU MADE HER DAY.

OKAY, SO I'M A FRIENDLY GUY.

YOUR DOG IS "FRIENDLY."

YOU ARE A PLAYER.

AND I DON'T WANT TO
PLAY ANYMORE.

CAN I GET BY HERE, PLEASE?

[WINCING]

BAILEY, HEY.

HI.

I SAW WHAT
HAPPENED THERE.

I GOT SOME FROZEN PEAS.

OH. PET STORE GUY.

-YEAH.
-HI.

-HEY.
-THANK YOU. OKAY.

PLEASE, SIT DOWN.

[WINCING]

AND THE THING IS,

IT WAS JUST NICE
TO BE DATING AGAIN, YOU
KNOW,

AND, I CAN'T LIE,

HE WAS EASY
ON THE EYES.

AND I LOVE
HIS DOG, ADAM.

HIS DOG IS SO GREAT.

HE'S SUCH A SWEET GUY.

OKAY, THIS IS BORING.

NO, NOT AT ALL.

[LAUGHING] OKAY.

YOU KNOW WHAT
I LOVE ABOUT DOGS?

NOT JUST THAT THEY DON'T
TALK BACK, THERE'S THAT,

BUT THAT THEY'RE SO
ACCEPTING.

THEY'RE SO CAPABLE
OF THAT UNCONDITIONAL LOVE

THAT'S KIND OF
A SUPERHUMAN TRAIT,

YOU KNOW?

MY MOM SAYS,

"IF YOU CAN FIND A MAN
WHO CAN LOVE YOU LIKE A DOG,

YOU WILL HAVE FOUND
TRUE LOVE,"

WHICH IS... MAYBE WHY
SHE HASN'T FOUND ANYONE

IN THE 10 YEARS
SINCE MY DAD HAS DIED.

ALL RIGHT, I'M SHUTTING UP.
THANK YOU.

I REALLY FEEL MUCH BETTER,
SO THANKS.

HEY, NO PROBLEM.

YOU EVER SEE THAT
WADE CHARACTER AGAIN?

[GROANS]

AT SCHOOL A FEW TIMES,
BUT I PRETTY MUCH IGNORED
HIM.

I TRIED IGNORING LOUIE
FOREVER,

BUT I STILL COULDN'T
GET RID OF HIM.

OH, SO YOU TWO...?

MM-HMM,
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.

31 YEARS,

ROCKIN' AND SOCKIN'.

YEAH, LIFE'S FULL OF
CRAZY SURPRISES.

YEAH, WELL, THE OPERATIVE
WORD
THERE IS "CRAZY."

YOU NEED TO FINISH YOUR
STORY.

OKAY, SO ABOUT
A MONTH OR SO LATER,

I GET A CALL FROM WADE.

YEAH, SO, YOU KNOW,
TERRY JANSSEN'S COMING BACK,

MY GIG IS UP,
AND I'M THINKING,

"HEY, YOU KNOW,
MAYBE IT'S A SIGN,

"MAYBE IT'S TIME
TO SHAKE THINGS UP.

MOVE SOMEWHERE NEW,
START OVER."

WHAT'S HER NAME?

SUSIE.

WAIT, "RUNNER-UP"
FROM THE PARTY?

YEAH. YEAH, THAT'S HER.

"KILL ME NOW," SHE SAID.

OH, SUSIE'S ACTUALLY
A REALLY NICE GIRL,

AND SHE THOUGHT
THAT YOU WERE VERY PRETTY.

REMIND ME TO SEND HER
A THANK YOU NOTE.

ANYWAY, SHE'S MOVING
TO SEATTLE,

AND I'M GOING WITH HER,
SO I FIGURE, "HEY,

THEY TEACH GYM
EVERYWHERE, RIGHT?"

IS GYM REALLY SOMETHING
YOU TEACH,

OR IS IT MORE
JUST A STATE OF MIND?

ANYWAY, SUSIE'S GETTING
AN APARTMENT,

THEY'RE NOT ALLOWED
TO HAVE PETS THERE,

AND I THOUGHT, YEAH, I
DIDN'T
WANT TO SHOW UP WITH ADAM,

YOU KNOW, AND IT BE
ALL AWKWARD, SO--

SAY NO MORE.

I'M HAPPY TO ADOPT HIM.

YES.

ALL RIGHT, BUD.

THIS IS YOUR NEW HOME, 'KAY?

COME ON.

SEE?

GIVE ME HIS STUFF.

THANK YOU, BALES.

I KNEW YOU'D SAY YES.

YEAH, OF COURSE, YOU DID.

BYE.

AND THAT IS
HOW I GOT ADAM,

THE FIRST OF
THE THREE LOVES OF MY LIFE.

BUT THAT DOESN'T EXPLAIN
HOW YOU ENDED UP HERE,

IN THAT DRESS,

ON A NIGHT LIKE THIS?

PLEASE, LOUIE, GEEZ,

WOULD YOU JUST
LET THE GIRL FINISH?

SORRY, BAILEY, YOU GO AHEAD.

[CLEARS THROAT]

WELL, AS GREAT AS ADAM WAS,

HE CLEARLY NEEDED
SOME DISCIPLINE.

MM.

ADAM, DOWN.

BUDDY. ADAM.

GET DOWN.

SOMEBODY'S GOT
A MIND OF HIS OWN.

YEAH, HE JUST HAS TO LEARN

HE CAN'T GO AFTER
EVERYTHING HE SEES.

KIND OF LIKE HIS EX-DAD.

YEAH.

YEAH.

OH.

ACTUALLY,
EXACTLY LIKE HIS EX-DAD.

[CHUCKLING]

ADAM!

[LAUGHING] OH, WOW.

HI.

THIS IS ADAM.

COME ON, BUDDY,
COME HERE.

OH, WOW.

THANKS.

YOU KNOW, BALES,
I'VE GOTTA SAY,

I NEVER REALLY THOUGHT
WADE WAS FOR YOU.

YEAH. OKAY.

I KNOW, BUT
I LEARNED FROM IT.

WHAT?

THAT FUN AND CUTE
IS NOT ALL THERE IS.

THAT, YOU KNOW,

HONESTY AND LOYALTY
COME FIRST.

AND, WHILE WE'RE AT IT,

MAYBE A LITTLE MORE DEPTH,

A LITTLE MORE INTELLECT.

WELL, I WAS INVITED
TO AN ART OPENING NEXT WEEK.

TRAVIS IS COMING.

SHOULD BE CRAWLING

WITH THE DEEP AND THE
BRAINY.

WE SHOULD GO.

OKAY, GOOD.

WHICH ONE'S
YOUR FAVORITE HERE?

OH, UM, YEAH,
I DON'T KNOW.

THEY'RE ALL
PRETTY UNIQUE.

UM, WHAT'S YOURS?

WELL, SINCE
I'M A STRICT DISCIPLE

OF BOTH ABSTRACT
EXPRESSIONISM

AND FANTASTIC REALISM,

I PREFER THE INK WASHES
AND MEZZOTINTS.

YOU?

WHO WANTS
CHAMPAGNE?

I'M IN.

IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME
FOR JUST ONE MOMENT.

[CLEARS THROAT]

THANK YOU.

THAT WAS FAST.

HMM...

I WANT SOMEONE SMART,
NOT INCOMPREHENSIBLE.

DID YOU HEAR THAT?

THAT'S FUNNY,
BECAUSE, NORMALLY, IT'S MEN

WHO FIND THAT WOMEN
ARE HARD TO UNDERSTAND.

MAYBE IF THEY JUST
PAID ATTENTION.

IS THAT A CRACK ABOUT US
NOT GETTING MARRIED,

BECAUSE IF IT IS,
I KEEP TELLING YOU,

IF IT'S NOT BROKEN,
WHY BREAK IT?

HOW-HOW TO--

SEE?

IT MAKES SENSE.

YEAH.

I HOPE THAT'S
RHETORICAL,

AND ON BEHALF OF WOMEN
EVERYWHERE--

LIKE WHAT YOU SEE?

UM... YES.

I LIKE YOUR SCARF?

[LAUGHS] THANKS.

BUT I MEANT THE ART.

I'M SO GLAD
YOU MEANT THE ART.

[LAUGHS]

UM, THE ART IS...

UH, WHAT'S THE WORD
FOR IT?

PRETENTIOUS?

OH, THAT MIGHT WORK.

YEAH.

ARE YOU AN ARTIST?

YES, UH, BUT NOT
THIS KIND.

WORDS ARE MY CANVAS.

OH, A WRITER. MM-HMM.

PLAYWRIGHT, TO BE EXACT.

MM-HMM.

I'M JONATHAN.
JONATHAN MITCHELL.

BAILEY.
BAILEY DALEY.

HOW ALLITERATIVE.

UM... NO, THAT WOULD BE
"BAILEY BALEY."

YES...

OR "DAILEY DALEY."

...IDIOT.

NO, NO, I'M SO SORRY.

I'M AN ENGLISH
TEACHER, SO...

AN ENGLISH TEACHER?

YEAH.
[CLEARS THROAT]

LISTEN, UH...

I NEED TO GET BACK
TO MY FRIENDS, BUT...

OKAY.

ARE YOU KIDDING?

I-I LOVE JAZZ.

I'M A JAZZ... NUT.

YEAH?

YEAH.

SUPERB.

DO YOU WANT TO CATCH THE
SHOW
ON FRIDAY NIGHT

AT THE BAKERY?

I WOULD LOVE TO.

WHICH BAKERY?

Y-YOU KNOW, "THE" BAKERY--

THE JAZZ BAKERY.

OH. YES, THE JAZZ...
CLUB THAT I LOVE.

ON CRESCENT.

YES.

THE SHOW STARTS AT 9:00.

OKAY.

FRIDAY NIGHT, THEN.

FRIDAY NIGHT, THEN.

[SQUEAKING IN EXCITEMENT]

YES.

SO, I ALSO NEED TO LEARN
EVERYTHING I CAN ABOUT JAZZ

BETWEEN NOW AND FRIDAY.

YEAH. JAZZ.

MM-HMM, MM-HMM.

JAZZ NUT.

YOU HEARD THAT?

[LAUGHING]

WHAT WERE YOU
THINKING?

MILES DAVIS, STAN GETZ,
DAVE BRUBECK?

WHEN DID YOU BECOME
A FAN OF JAZZ?

JUST NOW.

IT'S A LITTLE CRASH COURSE
BEFORE MY DATE WITH
JONATHAN.

I SEE.

WHAT WILL YOU PLAY THEM ON,
YOUR IMAGINARY TURNTABLE?

OKAY, SO...

IT'S KIND OF JUST FOR SHOW.

I JUST, I WANT TO
HAVE THEM.

IT'S VERY HIP AND
INTELLIGENT.

WELL, IN CASE
YOU FORGOT,

YOU'RE ALREADY
A VERY INTELLIGENT WOMAN.

YES, MOM.

YOU TELL ME TO BE
OPEN TO NEW THINGS?

I'M OPEN TO NEW THINGS.

JAZZ!

MM-HMM.

JOHN COLTRANE,

IF YOU REALLY WANT
TO IMPRESS HIM.

OH, LISTEN TO YOU.

[CHUCKLES RUEFULLY]
OH, I WISH YOU WOULD.

WOW! THAT WAS SUBLIME.

YEAH.

YOU KNOW, I DON'T
MEET MANY WOMEN

THAT ARE INTO JAZZ.

I DON'T MEET MANY MEN

WHO USE
THE WORD "SUBLIME."

YOU WANT TO GO
SOMEWHERE FOR A DRINK?

SURE.

OKAY.

AND... GO.

WHOA!

GOOD BOY.
WELL DONE, MATE.

WOW, YOU TWO
ARE GETTING ALONG.

DON'T TAKE IT
PERSONALLY, THOUGH,

HE LIKES EVERYONE.

ADAM SHOULD MEET EVE.

UH, METAPHORICALLY
SPEAKING?

NO, EVE.

MY DOG.

YOU HAVE A DOG NAMED EVE?

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

WHAT ARE THE ODDS OF THAT?

WELL, CHEERS

TO ADAM AND EVE.

CHEERS.

[LAUGHS]

SHE'S A GOOD GIRL.

EVE CAN BE
A BIT MOODY.

KIND OF GOES
HER OWN WAY, YOU KNOW?

WELL, I ADORE ALL DOGS,
SO I'M HAPPY TO MEET HER.

[CLEARS THROAT
AWKWARDLY]

MILES, BRUBECK,

COLTRANE.

CLASSIC.

[LAUGHS]

YEAH. I MEAN, RIGHT?

IT JUST DOESN'T GET ANY
BETTER.

AND ON VINYL NO LESS.

VERY COOL.

WHERE'S YOUR TURNTABLE?

LET'S GIVE THEM A SPIN.

UM, MY, UH, TURNTABLE...

JUST COMPLETELY DIED LAST
WEEK.

IT'S BEING FIXED.

AH, WELL, A SHAME.

ANOTHER TIME.

YEAH.

SALINGER,

BRONTE, DICKENS...

YES, AS YOU KNOW,
I TEACH LITERATURE, SO...

VERY COOL.

[CHUCKLES]

BUT I KIND OF DIG
THE TOUGHER STUFF,

THOMAS PYNCHON,
JAMES JOYCE,

MARCEL PROUST.

TALK ABOUT DEEP.

SO DEEP.

YOU'VE READ PROUST, RIGHT?

WHAT AM I SAYING?
[CHUCKLES]

YOU TEACH LITERATURE.

OF COURSE, YOU HAVE.

I'M ACHING TO KNOW
WHERE YOU STAND

ON "IN SEARCH OF
LOST TIME."

IT'S SUCH A HUGE
CONVERSATION.

WHY DON'T WE JUST
SAVE IT FOR NEXT TIME?

PROUST?

YOU'RE KIDDING.

IT'S AMAZING.

I CAN'T BELIEVE
I'VE NEVER READ IT BEFORE.

HMM.

PAGE FIVE.

YOU'RE REALLY
RIPPING THROUGH IT.

IT'S ONE OF THE MOST
IMPORTANT
LITERARY WORKS

OF THE 20th CENTURY, SO
I'M...

SAID THE TALL, HOT
PLAYWRIGHT
WITH THE DREAMY ACCENT.

HE'S ALSO
A REALLY GOOD KISSER.

HMM.

KEEP READING.

[CHUCKLING]

OH!

I WANT TO INVITE JONATHAN
OVER TO MOM'S

FOR SUNDAY DINNER.

YOU AND TRAVIS
WILL BE THERE, YES?

DON'T YOU THINK
YOU SHOULD GO THROUGH

A FEW MORE CHAPTERS FIRST?

AND I'M NOT TALKING
ABOUT THE BOOK.

IT'LL BE FUN.

I JUST WANT HIM
TO MEET YOU GUYS.

OKAY.

'KAY.

YOU ALL RIGHT?

YEAH.

I'M JUST
A LITTLE WORRIED

ABOUT THE ENDING
OF MY NEW PLAY.

DOES IT WORK? NOT WORK?

I MEAN, THE REST
IS PRETTY GREAT,

EVEN IF I DO SAY SO MYSELF.

[LAUGHS]

WELL, YOU WOULDN'T HAVE TO
IF YOU'D LET ME READ IT.

THANKS, BUT I'D RATHER
YOU HEARD IT FRESH.

YOU KNOW, FOR THE FIRST TIME
AT THE STAGED READING NEXT
WEEK.

IT'S A WRITER THING.

OKAY, WELL,
I'M SURE IT'S BRILLIANT,

INCLUDING THE ENDING.

WELL, HERE'S HOPING.

[CHUCKLES]

HEY, SPEAKING
OF BRILLIANT,

ARE YOU READY
TO RAP ABOUT PROUST?

YOU KNOW, I AM RE-READING
"IN SEARCH OF LOST TIME,"

AND... [SIGHS]
IT'S INCREDIBLE.

WHICH VOLUME ARE YOU ON?

THE FIRST.

OKAY.

OKAY, WELL, WE'LL WAIT UNTIL
YOU'VE REVISITED ALL SEVEN,

AND THEN WE'LL GO AT IT,

YOU KNOW, PAGE BY PAGE.

[CLEARS THROAT AWKWARDLY]

WOULD YOU LIKE TO
COME OVER FOR DINNER

AT MY MOM'S HOUSE ON SUNDAY?

IT'S KIND OF A WEEKLY RITUAL
WITH MY FRIENDS.

AND I WANT
TO MEET EVE.

UNLESS YOU HAVE PLANS.
IT'S...

I'M NOT ALL THAT BIG ON...

RITUAL.

BUT, SURE...

[CHUCKLES]

IF IT MEANS SPENDING
IT WITH YOU.

[CHUCKLES]
OKAY, GOOD.

ADAM AND EVE
SURE ARE GETTING ALONG.

JONATHAN, HOW DO YOU
LIKE YOUR ROAST BEEF,

MEDIUM OR RARE?

MOM, JONATHAN'S
VEGETARIAN.

OH.

YOU KNOW WHAT,

I CAN GRILL YOU UP SOME
SALMON?
I DO HAVE SOME FROZEN.

PRETTY SURE
FISH IS AN ANIMAL.

NO, SOME VEGETARIANS
DO EAT FISH, DON'T THEY?

PESCATARIANS EAT FISH.

OKAY. YOU'RE THE TEACHER.

RICE AND SALAD
WILL BE JUST FINE.

THANK YOU.

OKAY.

WHEN IT COMES
TO VEGETABLES,

NOTHING BEATS
DINA'S CANDIED CARROTS.

THEY'RE AMAZING.

YEAH, I TRY TO
AVOID SUGAR, TOO.

BUT I WILL TAKE A ROLL.

GO CRAZY, PAL.

JONATHAN, TELL EVERYONE
ABOUT YOUR NEW PLAY.

OH, YES.

SO EXCITING.

WELL, IT'S CALLED
"SUFFER TIME."

I'M SORRY?

-"SUFFER TIME."
-"SUFFER TIME."

OKAY, UH...

WHAT'S IT ABOUT?

WELL, UH, DASHED HOPES,
LOST DREAMS,

UNREQUITED LOVE.

SO IT'S A COMEDY?

[LAUGHTER]

YOU KNOW, I'D REALLY
RATHER NOT DISCUSS IT,

IF THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

OH, YEAH.

WELL, EVERYTHING
LOOKS LOVELY, MOM.

IT'S SUPER,
AS USUAL, DINA.

HEY, JONATHAN, AFTER
WE'RE DONE EATING,

DO YOU WANT TO WATCH
SOME FOOTBALL?

I THINK MICHIGAN'S GONNA
CRUSH PENN STATE!

AMERICAN FOOTBALL'S
A LITTLE RAH-RAH FOR ME,

BUT, HEY, ENJOY.

I HOPE JONATHAN
ENJOYED HIMSELF.

HE SEEMS A LITTLE...

SERIOUS.

NO, HE'S JUST DEEPER
THAN MOST GUYS.

AND HE HAD A GREAT TIME,
I PROMISE.

WHAT ABOUT YOU?

YOU HARDLY TOUCHED
YOUR ROAST BEEF.

I TOLD YOU,
EVERYTHING WAS DELICIOUS.

I'M JUST TRYING TO BE--

TRYING TO BE CONSIDERATE
OF YOUR NEW BOYFRIEND.

DID YOU KNOW

VEGETARIANS CAN LIVE
EIGHT YEARS LONGER

THAN MEAT-EATERS?

DOESN'T MATTER IF A GUY
LIVES
TO BE A HUNDRED

IF HE ISN'T FOR YOU.

WELL, WHAT IF
HE IS FOR ME?

LOOK, ALL I'M SAYING
IS JUST...

WATCH OUT FOR
THOSE KIND OF...

COMPLICATED ONES,
OKAY, HONEY?

OKAY.

ADAM...

LOOK WHAT I HAVE
FOR YOU.

THERE'S A GOOD BOY.

LOOK WHAT I HAVE FOR YOU!
WANT ME TO PACK THIS UP?

YES, PLEASE.

THANK YOU.

OUR FATE CHOOSES US.

IT'S NOT AS EASY
AS ALL THAT, TOM.

IT'S AS EASY OR AS HARD
AS YOU MAKE IT,

WOULDN'T YOU SAY?

I WOULD SAY WE'RE
JUST LUCKY TO BE ALIVE.

OR ARE WE?

LUCKY?

NO... ALIVE.

[HESITANT APPLAUSE]

JONATHAN, HEY.

YOU HATED IT,
DIDN'T YOU?

NO, I DIDN'T.

IT WAS... STUNNING.

OH, SAVE IT, BAILEY.

IT STANK.

YOU KNOW IT, I KNOW IT,

THEY CERTAINLY KNOW IT.

YOU'RE BEING
WAY TOO HARD ON YOURSELF.

YOU SHOULD BE PROUD, YOU
KNOW?

YOU REALLY--YOU REALLY
ACCOMPLISHED SOMETHING.

SERIOUSLY?

SERIOUSLY.

YOU KNOW, YOU MADE
SOMETHING...

SO... SPECIAL.

YOU'RE RIGHT.

IT PROBABLY JUST NEEDS
A LITTLE BIT OF WORK.

YEAH.

MAYBE...

FILL IN A FEW GAPS,
CLEAN UP SOME DIALOGUE,

MAYBE EVEN TRIM A SCENE OR
TWO.

TRIM. TRIM, TRIM AWAY, YEAH.

YOU KNOW, LESS IS MORE.

THAT'S WHAT I TELL MY
STUDENTS.

THANKS, BAILEY!

LESS REALLY IS MORE.

HEY.

OH.

CHEERS.

[CLINKING GLASSES]

TO TRIMMING.

AND GENIUS.

[SIGHING]

SO IT WAS
REALLY THAT BAD?

I'M AN ENGLISH TEACHER

AND MY BOYFRIEND
IS A TERRIBLE PLAYWRIGHT.

IT'S DEEPLY AWKWARD
AND IRONIC.

AT LEAST YOU DIDN'T TWIST
YOUR ANKLE THIS TIME.

NO, JUST THE TRUTH.

[AMBER CHUCKLES] OH.

DINNER IS READY.

ALREADY?

ALREADY?
IT TOOK ME TWO HOURS.

WOW, I HAD NO IDEA.

OH, WELL, COME TASTE

THIS DELICIOUS,
DAIRY-FREE SOUP I MADE YOU.

ACTUALLY, I'M ON A MAJOR
ROLL
WITH THIS REWRITE,

BUT YOU... ENJOY.

NO, NO, NO, I'LL WAIT FOR
YOU.

I'LL KEEP IT WARM.

I APPRECIATE IT.

REALLY.

BUT I'M TRYING TO
MAKE THIS PLAY AMAZING,

AND, WELL, YOU WOULDN'T WANT
ME

TO INTERRUPT THE FLOW,
WOULD YOU?

NO... NO.

GO WITH THE FLOW.

[♪♪♪]

HEY, GUYS.

[WHISPERS] DOWN, GIRL.

LET'S SEE WHAT THIS IS
ABOUT.

[CHUCKLING]

OKAY...

BAILEY, HI.

-HI.
-WELCOME.

HEY, YOU.

I'M NOT ONE TO MISS
A "SUNNY SUNDAY SALE."

WHICH IS...
WHICH IS WHAT, EXACTLY?

IT'S SUNNY, IT'S SUNDAY,
AND STUFF'S ON SALE.

WHY NOT, RIGHT?

THERE YOU GO.

HOW'S MR. ADAM DOING?

HEY, HOW ARE YOU?

OH, HE'S GREAT,
AS YOU CAN SEE.

HE'S ALWAYS GREAT.

AND ADAM'S DAD?

UM, MOVED TO SEATTLE,

BELIEVE IT OR NOT,
WITH...

THE GIRL FROM THE PARTY.

NO. REALLY?

YES.

TRUTH IS STRANGER THAN
FICTION.

BUT I GOT ADAM
OUT OF THE DEAL,

SO, YOU KNOW, HAPPY ENDING.

HAS ADAM BEEN ASKING FOR
A BROTHER OR SISTER YET?

UM, HE ACTUALLY HAS KIND OF
A HALF-SISTER RIGHT NOW.

A DALMATIAN NAMED EVE.

ADAM AND EVE?

[LAUGHS] YEAH.

WHEN HER DAD, JONATHAN,

TOLD ME ABOUT THAT,

I DIDN'T EVEN
BELIEVE HIM.

ARE ADAM AND EVE CLOSE?

YEAH, THEY SEE QUITE
A BIT OF EACH OTHER,

SO YEAH,
THEY'RE GETTING THERE.

HI, SWEETHEART.

UM, SO, HEY,

IS DOG FOOD PART OF THE
SALE?

NO, BUT, UH,
FOR YOU AND ADAM,

I CAN MAKE AN EXCEPTION.

HOW ABOUT 10% OFF?

OKAY, 15, BUT THAT'S
MY FINAL OFFER.

[LAUGHS] OKAY.

WELL, WHAT CAN YOU SHOW ME

IN THE WAY OF A NICE
LAMB AND RICE KIBBLE?

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

[INSISTENT KNOCKING]

HEY!

LISTEN, I HAVE
GREAT NEWS!

YOU DO? WHAT?

I JUST FINISHED THE REWRITE.

THE PLAY IS OFFICIALLY DONE.

CONGRATULATIONS,
I CAN'T WAIT TO READ IT!

I CAN READ IT, RIGHT?

NOT ONLY CAN YOU READ IT,
YOU CAN READ IT RIGHT NOW.

BUT WE'LL HAVE TO BE
AT AMBER'S IN 10 MINUTES--

BAILEY, I NEED
YOUR OPINION.

IT CAN'T WAIT.

I HAVE TO KNOW WHAT I'VE
GOT.

WE'LL MISS THE WHOLE PARTY.

WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO GO
TO SOME SILLY PARTY

WHEN YOU COULD BE MAKING

SUCH AN IMPORTANT
CULTURAL CONTRIBUTION?

ALL RIGHT, I'M CONFUSED
ABOUT SOMETHING.

WHEN I WANTED TO
READ YOUR STUFF,

YOU PROTECTED IT FROM ME

LIKE IT WAS SOME
FRAGILE BUTTERFLY.

WHEN YOU WANT ME
TO READ YOUR STUFF,

I HAVE TO MISS MY BEST
FRIEND'S BIRTHDAY PARTY?

YOU WANTED AN ARTIST,
I'M AN ARTIST.

THAT'S WHAT WE DO.

I WANTED SOMEONE
BRIGHT AND INTERESTING,

NOT SOME MOODY,
SELF-ABSORBED
PSEUDO-INTELLECTUAL.

"PSEUDO?"

[QUIETLY] YEAH.

I KNEW THINGS
WOULDN'T WORK OUT BETWEEN
US.

LOOK HOW LONG IT TOOK YOU
TO RE-READ PROUST.

I MEAN, WHAT KIND OF
AN ENGLISH TEACHER ARE YOU?

ONE WHO LOVES TO READ

AND HAS NEVER BEEN
SO BORED BY A SET OF BOOKS

IN HER LIFE.

ARE YOU GOING TO
READ MY PLAY OR NOT?

HAVE YOU NOT HEARD
ANYTHING I'VE JUST SAID?

ACTUALLY, I THINK I'VE HEARD
MORE THAN I NEEDED TO.

GOODBYE, BAILEY.

GOODBYE.

DON'T LET THE DOOR
HIT YOU ON THE WAY OUT.

[SLAMS DOOR]

[SIGHS HEAVILY]

HE JUST LEFT YOU?
[SLAMS DOOR]

RIGHT THEN AND THERE?

WELL, IT WAS
PRETTY MUTUAL.

BUT IT WAS OKAY.

I HAD AMBER'S BIRTHDAY PARTY
TO GO TO,

SO I HAD A GREAT TIME.

ATTA GIRL,
YOU HAD SOMEWHERE TO GO,

AND YOU WERE ALL DRESSED UP.

THE GUY WAS A WET BLANKET.

WHO NEEDS HIM?

I DIDN'T EXACTLY
PUT ON BLINDERS WITH
JONATHAN.

BUT I DEFINITELY PUT ON
SOME ROSE-COLORED GLASSES.

HONEY, SOMETIMES, WE JUST
SEE
WHAT WE WANT TO SEE.

[LAUGHING]

IS THAT HOW YOU GOT
SPOT HERE?

WELL, REMEMBER I TOLD YOU
EVE WAS VERY MOODY?

TURNS OUT SHE WAS MORE
ATTACHED
TO ME THAN I KNEW.

SINCE WE BROKE UP,
SHE'S BEEN INCONSOLABLE.

I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO,

SO I BROUGHT HER HERE
TO SEE YOU.

EVE...

COME HERE.

SO YOU'LL TAKE HER?

UH... TO FOSTER, OR...?

JUST UNTIL SHE'S BACK
TO HER OLD SELF.

I DON'T KNOW.
I MEAN, SHE'S YOUR DOG.

NOBODY REALLY OWNS ANYBODY
OR ANYTHING.

BESIDES,

LOOK HOW MUCH BETTER
SHE ALREADY SEEMS

WITH YOU.

SO, THAT'S HOW EVE BECAME
MINE.

AND ONCE I HAD HER,
I WOULDN'T LET HER GO.

STILL DOESN'T
EXPLAIN THE DRESS.

YEAH, OR LITTLE MISS
SHIRLEY THERE.

WELL, NOW'S WHEN IT REALLY
GETS INTERESTING.

OH, HEY, I, UH,

I HEAR THERE'S A HOT
NEW SCIENCE SUB.

ROAMING THE HALLS.

WANT TO CHECK THAT OUT?

NO, NO.
NO MORE SERIAL DATING.

THE NEXT BOYFRIEND
WILL BE PERFECT,

OR THERE WILL BE
NO BOYFRIEND.

DEFINE "PERFECT"
AFTER WADE AND JONATHAN.

MM... BALANCED, TOGETHER,

KNOWS WHAT HE WANTS,

KNOWS WHO HE WANTS--

OF COURSE, AND WITH
THE FACE AND BODY OF A GOD.

[LAUGHS] YES.

LET'S GET FIT.

OH, HEY, WANT TO GO
POWER-HIKING

WITH ADAM AND EVE?

MM... LET'S DO YOGA.

YOGA, HMM...

AND CONTINUE
IN OUR DOWNWARD DOG,

HIPS UP TO THE CEILING,

SHOULDERS
AWAY FROM YOUR EARS,

FEET HIP-WIDTH APART.

I'VE NEVER SEEN A DOG
IN THIS POSITION,

DOWNWARD OR OTHERWISE.

THIS IS FUN, SHH.

-NO.
-NO?

IT'S NOT FUN.

AND COMING INTO
PLANK POSE...

LOWER TO CHATURANGA...

AND INTO UPWARD-FACING DOG.

BEGINNERS?

WHAT GAVE US AWAY?

ON A SCALE OF 1 TO 10,
HOW ARE WE DOING?

OH, UH, SOLID 7.

NICE.

DON'T WORRY,

YOU'LL BE "UPWARD DOGGING"
WITH THE BEST IN NO TIME.

NOW, WE'RE GOING TO STAY
HERE

AND TAKE A FULL
THREE BREATHS.

[BREATHING DEEPLY]

NO.

[EXHALING DEEPLY]

GOOD WORK, LADIES.

YOU'RE NOW OFFICIALLY
YOGA SURVIVORS.

I'M ERIC STRANG,
BY THE WAY.

I'M BAILEY.

AMBER.

SO, ERIC, UH,

WILL WE SEE YOU NEXT WEEK
AT THIS CLASS?

UH, IF I'M NOT
DRIVING GOLF BALLS.

I USUALLY SWITCH OFF
WITH YOGA, SO...

OH, I LOVE GOLF.

YOU DO?

YEAH.

YOU SHOULD SEE HER SLAM
AROUND THAT LITTLE BALL.

SHE SHOWS IT
NO MERCY.

SHE'S EXAGGERATING
A LITTLE BIT.

YEAH?

OKAY, WELL,
WHY DON'T YOU SHOW ME?

WHY DON'T YOU MEET ME
AT THE DRIVING RANGE

NEXT SATURDAY MORNING,

OVER ON BRIAR THERE.

WE'LL KNOCK OUT
A FEW BUCKETS.

MAYBE I WILL.

OKAY.

WELL, NICE MEETING YOU.

YOU DO KNOW

HE'S TALKING ABOUT
BIG BOY GOLF, RIGHT?

NOT THE WINDMILL,
LOOP-DE-LOOP KIND?

HOW HARD CAN IT BE?

RIGHT.

OH...KAY.

UH, I TOLD YOU
THAT AMBER EXAGGERATED.

NO WORRIES.

HEY, I'M JUST
GLAD YOU'RE HERE.

[LAUGHS]

SO, I AM NOT
AN EXPERT,

BUT, UH, CAN I GIVE YOU
SOME ADVICE, ABOUT GOLF?

"KEEP MY DAY JOB?"

"DON'T GO PRO."

BOTH OF THOSE ARE ACCURATE.

NO, I DOWNLOADED THIS APP
JUST IN CASE,

JUST TO HELP YOU HERE.

UM, SO SEE THIS GUY?

SEE WHAT HE'S DOING THERE
WITH THE FOLLOW THROUGH?

IT'S ALL ABOUT
THE FOLLOW THROUGH.

RIGHT?

OKAY.

OKAY, SO WATCH ME HERE.

YOU WANT TO, UH,

TRY TO THINK OF THE CLUB

AS LIKE A WHIP.

YOU WANT TO
WHIP THROUGH THE BALL

AND THEN FOLLOW THROUGH.

THE KEY IS
THE FOLLOW THROUGH, RIGHT?

NICE.

IT WAS ALL RIGHT.

WHY DON'T YOU GIVE IT A GO?

[LAUGHS] OKAY.

WHIP THROUGH THE BALL,
FOLLOW THROUGH.

OKAY.

FOLLOWING THROUGH.

IS THAT...?

OH.

WHOOPS.

THAT'S ALL RIGHT,
WE GOT THIS.

OKAY, GRAB
ANOTHER BALL,

AND, UM...

THAT'S GOOD.

OKAY, SO TAKE
THE POSITION AGAIN.

OKAY...

NOW, JUST RELAX,

AND REMEMBER
THE FOLLOW THROUGH,

AND NICE AND EASY SWING.

GIVE IT A SHOT.

OKAY.

FOLLOWING... THROUGH.

THERE WE GO!

[SQUEALS IN TRIUMPH]

I TOLD YOU
AMBER WAS EXAGGERATING.

NO, WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT?

I'M JUST GLAD
WE DID THIS.

IT WAS FUN.

IT WAS FUN.

IT WAS MORE FUN
THAN YOGA, I MUST SAY,

AND LESS PAINFUL.

WELL, I DON'T KNOW
ABOUT THAT.

I'VE HAD A FEW FOUR-PUTTS
THAT WERE PRETTY PAINFUL.

YEAH?

SO, I DIDN'T EVEN ASK,
WHAT DO YOU DO?

OH, I'M IN RETAIL.

WHAT ABOUT YOU?

I'M IN HIGH SCHOOL.

[MUMBLING] UH, I TEACH
HIGH SCHOOL ENGLISH...

I CAN HARDLY SPEAK IT.

[CHUCKLING]

WELL, ENGLISH,
THAT'S GOOD

BECAUSE I SPEAK ENGLISH.

THERE YOU GO.

YOU WANT SOME HELP?

LET ME HELP YOU.

SURE, THANK YOU.

UM... LET ME...

THERE YOU GO.

YEAH, A GOOD BOOK,
A GLASS OF WINE,

ROARING FIRE,
I'M A PRETTY HAPPY GUY.

NICE.

HAVE YOU EVER READ

"IN SEARCH OF LOST TIME"
BY PROUST?

BY WHO?

THAT IS ACTUALLY
THE CORRECT ANSWER.

PLEASE FORGET
THAT I MENTIONED IT.

OKAY, I'M GLAD
I PASSED THAT ONE,

WHATEVER THAT WAS.

I'M SORRY.

OKAY.

WELL, UH...
WE SHOULD DO THIS AGAIN--

NOT GOLF, BUT A PROPER DATE.

I WOULD LIKE THAT.

-YEAH?
-YEAH.

OKAY THEN.

UM...

PHONE NUMBER?

SO, OF COURSE,

I AM MISS GOLF KLUTZ
OF THE YEAR,

BUT ERIC IS SO KIND,

AND HE'S SO PATIENT,
AND SO SWEET,

THAT, BY THE END OF IT,

I KIND OF KNEW
WHAT I WAS DOING.

WELL, I CERTAINLY HOPE SO.

YOU HOPE SO HOW?

HONEY, DO YOU REMEMBER
WHEN YOU WERE SEEING WADE?

DO YOU REMEMBER
WHAT I SAID TO YOU?

YOU SAID TO
STOP SEEING WADE.

NO. [CHUCKLES] NO.

THE POINT IS, ANY GUY
WOULD BE LUCKY TO HAVE YOU,

WHETHER YOU RUN MARATHONS,
EAT MEAT, OR PLAY GOLF.

OH, ERIC DOWNLOADED
THIS APP FOR ME

THAT SHOWS ME
A PERFECT GOLF SWING

START TO FINISH.

IT'S SO HELPFUL.

HMM, AND THOUGHTFUL,

AND PRESUMPTUOUS.

OH, MY GOSH, MOM--

WHAT?

I SAVED THE BEST FOR LAST.

LISTEN,

I GOOGLED HIM.

YEAH?

HE'S ERIC STRANG
OF STRANG'S FASHION SALONS.

WHAT?

V.P. OF BUSINESS
DEVELOPMENT.

OKAY. OKAY,
SO HE'S THE HEIR

OF A HIGHLY SUCCESSFUL
NATIONAL CHAIN

OF HIGH-END
CLOTHING STORES,

BUT HE IS STILL
JUST A GUY.

A CLEARLY SOLID,
RESPONSIBLE, AMBITIOUS GUY.

MM-HMM.

BAILEY,

DO YOU LIKE ERIC?

I THINK
HE'S PRETTY GREAT.

OKAY, SO THEN,
AT THIS POINT IN TIME,

THERE'S REALLY
ONE OTHER THING

THAT SHOULD
MATTER TO YOU.

WHAT?

WHERE DOES HE STAND ON DOGS?

SO, ADAM HERE IS THE
SWEETEST,
HAPPIEST BOY EVER,

AND EVE IS, UH,
SHE'S MORE SERIOUS,

SHE'S KIND OF ANXIOUS.

YEAH...

DO YOU LIKE DOGS?

UH, TRUTH?

I'VE NEVER REALLY BEEN
A BIG DOG PERSON.

OKAY, YOU'VE NOT MET
THE RIGHT ONE, CLEARLY.

HERE, TRY THIS GUY ON
FOR SIZE.

OKAY...

[CHUCKLES]

HERE WE GO--
OH. ALL RIGHT.

HEY, WHO'S WALKING
WHO THERE?

WHAT DO I DO?

JUST-JUST STOP.

OKAY.

[CHUCKLING] OKAY.

PHEW!

HERE. OKAY, THANKS.

THANK YOU.

YES, SIR. OKAY.

HE'S ACTUALLY
CALMED DOWN QUITE A BIT

SINCE I'VE HAD HIM.

CALMED DOWN?

REALLY, THAT'S, UH...

YOU MUST HAVE HAD
YOUR WORK CUT OUT FOR YOU.

OH, YEAH.

UH, SPEAKING OF WORK,
YOU SAID YOU WERE IN RETAIL.

TURNS OUT,
YOU ARE RETAIL.

I GOOGLED.
COULDN'T RESIST.

YEAH, WELL,

WHEN YOU'RE A STRANG,

THERE'S NO ESCAPING
THE FAMILY BUSINESS.

NOT THAT I'D WANT TO,
THOUGH.

I MEAN, IT'S
THE BEST JOB IN THE WORLD.

IT'S CREATIVE, IT'S
CHALLENGING,
IT'S PURPOSEFUL.

IT'S GREAT.

YOU'RE A LUCKY GUY.

WELL, I MET YOU,
DIDN'T I?

YOU WANT TO SIT DOWN?

YEAH.

[SIGHING]

HERE, BOY.

[LAUGHING] OKAY...

OH. OH, WOW.

ALL RIGHT. OKAY.

OKAY, DOWN, BOY.

HE'S A LOVER.

WHAT'S THE--
WHAT DO I SAY?

I DON'T KNOW.

I DON'T KNOW
HOW TO STOP IT.

I NEVER TRIED.

UH, HE IS A GOOD KISSER,
I'LL SAY THAT.

[LAUGHING] OKAY, OKAY...

HERE, I THINK I HAVE...

I GUESS I'M NOT SO MUCH
GOOD WITH DROOL EITHER.

OH, WELL...

HOW AM I DOING?

I THINK YOU'RE ALL RIGHT.

I'VE GOT... YEAH.

THANK YOU.

[CHUCKLES]

[♪♪♪]

HI!

HI, YOU!

OH, MY GOODNESS,
LET ME SEE YOUR FACE.

[GASPS IN DELIGHT]

OH...

YOU THINK ANY OF THESE
DOGS HAVE PAPERS?

PROBABLY NOT.

IT'S NOT ABOUT PEDIGREE,
IT'S A RESCUE, YOU KNOW?

HEY, YOU GUYS.

THIS FELLA HERE
COULD USE A GOOD HOME.

HEY, COLE.
HOW'S IT GOING?

WAIT, IS THIS
THE FAMOUS EVE?

THIS IS THE ONE.

HI! HI.

WHICH, WAIT,
SHOULD MAKE YOU JONATHAN,
YES?

OH. NOPE.

UM...

SO, EVE WAS JONATHAN'S,

AND NOW SHE'S MINE,

AND THIS IS ERIC.

UM, BABE, THIS ONE
IS SO CUTE.

DID YOU SEE THE LITTLE FACE
ON THIS ONE?

WHAT KIND OF DOG IS HE?

OH, HE'S A LITTLE OF THIS,
A LITTLE OF THAT.

DO YOU HAVE ONE

THAT'S A LOT OF
ALL OF ONE THING, OR..?

AROUND HERE, ALL DOGS
ARE CREATED EQUAL.

BABE, LOOK AT HIS FACE.

HE'S A SWEET POTATO.

LOOK AT HIS FACE!

YUP.

[SQUEALING IN DELIGHT]

I KNOW,
BUT I GOTTA THINK ABOUT IT.

OKAY.

LOOK, IF I COME
ACROSS A PUREBRED,

I CAN GIVE YOU A SHOUT.

OKAY.

IT'S LIKE BUYING A CAR,
I WANT TO LOOK AROUND.

IT'S SO NOT LIKE
BUYING A CAR.

IT'S LIKE CHOOSING
A MEMBER OF YOUR FAMILY.

IT'S ABOUT LOVE.

[CHUCKLES]

IT IS.

COME ON, FELLA.

YOU'RE REALLY SPECIAL,
YOU KNOW THAT?

THANKS. SO ARE YOU.

THANK YOU.

SO, NOW THAT MY PARENTS ARE
BACK FROM THEIR WORLD
CRUISE,

I REALLY WANT YOU
TO MEET THEM.

I WOULD LOVE TO.
WHEN?

IT'S ALL SET.

A SUNDAY BRUNCH,

AT MY MOM AND DAD'S
COUNTRY CLUB.

A COUNTRY CLUB,
THAT'S SWANKY.

IT'S JUST A PLACE
THEY'VE BELONGED TO FOREVER.

MY GRANDPARENTS, TOO.

IT'S KIND OF LIKE
A STRANG TRADITION THING.

YEAH? DOES THAT
INCLUDE YOU?

UH, MARRIED
COUPLES ONLY.

AH-HAH.

BELIEVE IT OR NOT.

AN OLD BYLAW.

THIS WAY.

BUT I AM HOPING
TO BECOME A MEMBER

AT SOME POINT.

MM-HMM.

HEY, YOU!

BAILEY, WHAT'S YOUR
PLEASURE,
PROSECCO OR CHAMPAGNE?

OH, UM...

CHAMPAGNE.

IF IT'S OKAY WITH EVERYONE
ELSE.

A BOTTLE OF CRISTAL, 2004.

MIGHT I SUGGEST THE 2006?

IT WAS A BETTER
GROWING SEASON.

I'M IN YOUR CAPABLE
HANDS, ERNESTO.

WELL, BAILEY,

TELL US,
WHAT IS IT YOU DO AGAIN?

OH, I'M AN ENGLISH TEACHER.

AT PARKVIEW HIGH.

PARKVIEW HIGH?

ISN'T THAT A PUBLIC SCHOOL?

YES. YES, IT IS.

OH.

WELL.

ISN'T THAT NICE?

TEACHING IS
A NOBLE PROFESSION.

WE NEED MORE TEACHERS.

AND WHAT DO YOUR PEOPLE DO?

GRANDMA,

THAT'S A LITTLE PERSONAL.

NO, THAT'S FINE.

UM, MY FATHER DIED
ABOUT 10 YEARS AGO,

HE MANAGED

A VALU-MART DOWNTOWN,

AND MY MOTHER
WORKS FOR A DENTIST.

OH, HYGIENIST?

RECEPTIONIST.

WELL...

WHERE WOULD WE BE

WITHOUT THE GATEKEEPERS?

AM I RIGHT?

ABSOLUTELY.

SHE RUNS THAT OFFICE
LIKE A WELL-OILED MACHINE.

LOOK, I KNOW
THEY'RE A LITTLE FORMAL,

BUT THEY'VE BEEN
GREAT PARENTS.

AND MY GRANDMOTHER,

SHE'S ALWAYS
BEEN THERE FOR ME.

WELL, THEY SEEMED
VERY NICE.

I JUST HOPE
THEY LIKED ME.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
THEY LOVED YOU.

REALLY?

WHAT MAKES YOU SO SURE?

BECAUSE I LOVE YOU.

WHY ARE WE STOPPING?

I WANT YOU
TO SEE SOMETHING.

TAKE A LOOK.

WHO LIVES HERE?

DO YOU LIKE IT?

IT'S BEAUTIFUL.

YEAH, I'VE HAD MY EYE
ON IT FOR A WHILE.

TO BUY?

[CHUCKLES]

IT'S KIND OF
A BIG HOUSE, THOUGH,

FOR JUST ONE PERSON,
DON'T YOU THINK?

IT'S KIND OF A BIG HOUSE

FOR MY ENTIRE
TENTH GRADE ENGLISH CLASS.

[LAUGHS]

[BAILEY]: I MEAN, IT HAS,
LIKE, ITS OWN LITTLE FOREST.

AND THE STONEWORK OUT IN
FRONT,
IT'S AMAZING,

AND THEN THE HOUSE
IS SO HUGE.

IT'S LIKE A LOG CABIN
CROSSED WITH A CASTLE.

OOH.

YEAH, WELL,
FIRST THINGS FIRST, HONEY.

I MEAN, ERIC HASN'T EVEN
ASKED YOU TO MARRY HIM.

THE WAY HE'S BEEN
ACTING LATELY,

HE MAY AS WELL HAVE
AN ENGAGEMENT RING

TAPED TO HIS FOREHEAD.

HMM, AND IS THAT A GOOD
THING?

HE'S ALL
I'VE EVER WANTED

IN SOMEONE.

[PHONE CHIMES]

OKAY, BUT
DO YOU LOVE HIM?

OH, MY GOSH,
THIS IS SO PERFECT!

TWO PUREBREDS JUST
CAME IN FOR ADOPTION

AT COLE'S PET SHOP,

AND IT'S ERIC'S BIRTHDAY
COMING UP.

YOU WON'T FIND
A BETTER DOG.

WE NEVER GET
FULL-BRED LABS FOR RESCUE.

LAB, THAT'S LIKE
A GOLDEN RETRIEVER, RIGHT?

LIKE ADAM?

YEAH.

YEAH, UH...
ADAM IS A BIT, UM...

TOO ACTIVE FOR ME MAYBE.

AND, UH, HE'S A BIT WET.

THERE YOU GO.

WELL, THIS IS SAM,

HE'S A WIRE-HAIRED
JACK RUSSELL.

HE'S A SUPER LITTLE DUDE.

TERRIERS ARE PRETTY

HIGH STRUNG, THOUGH,

FROM WHAT I'VE READ.

THEY'RE PRETTY MUCH

AS HIGH STRUNG
AS WHOEVER RAISES THEM.

OKAY, BUDDY.

BUT THEY SHED, TOO, RIGHT?

WELL, MOST DOGS DO.

KNOW WHY?
THEY'RE DOGS.

WELL, UH...

LET ME SLEEP ON IT, OKAY?

DON'T SLEEP TOO LONG.

DOGS LIKE THESE, THEY GO
FAST.

I SO WANTED YOU
TO HAVE A DOG

FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY.

I KNOW.

[QUIET CLASSICAL MUSIC
PLAYS]

I DON'T KNOW
WHAT COULD BE KEEPING ERIC.

HE DID SAY HE HAD A
SURPRISE.

THE ONLY SURPRISE
IS THAT HE'S NOT HERE YET,

AND I AM STARVING.

[BARKING]

SURPRISE!

[GASPS IN DELIGHT]
OH, MY GOSH!

WHO'S THIS?

-WHO IS THIS?
-IT'S MY DOG.

MOTHER PICKED HER OUT.

OH, I THOUGHT
WE'D DO THAT TOGETHER?

OH, COME ON,
WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL?

I DIDN'T ACTUALLY
PICK HER OUT.

I HAVE AN ACQUAINTANCE
AT THE CLUB

WHO SHOWS DOGS,
AND WINS TROPHIES AND SUCH,

AND I ASKED HER TO RECOMMEND
A SMALL DOG

WITH GOOD BREEDING.

IT'S A SHIH TZU.

THEY DON'T SHED.
THEY'RE HYPO-ALLERGENIC.

AND THE BREEDER
PROMISES

THAT HERS RARELY BARK.

NEVER, IF PROPERLY
TRAINED.

WHAT'S HER NAME?

UH, BALTHAZAR'S
IMPERIAL BELLE,

ACCORDING TO
HER PAPERS.

OH, FANCY SCHMANCY.
[CHUCKLES]

OH, BELLE?

OH, I DON'T THINK SO.

NO, I THINK YOU'RE
MORE OF A SHIRLEY.

SHIRLEY?

MM-HMM.

THAT'S MY LATE SISTER'S
NAME!

OH, HOW NICE
IS THAT?

THEN YOU CAN THINK OF HER
EVERY TIME YOU SEE THE DOG.

[CHUCKLING]

I REALLY DON'T THINK
I WOULD WANT AN ANIMAL

NAMED AFTER MY SISTER.

OH, NOW,
MOTHER, HUSH.

IT'S ERIC'S DOG,

HE CAN NAME IT
WHATEVER HE WANTS.

SHIRLEY IT IS.

SHIRLEY IT IS.

TO SHIRLEY.

TO SHIRLEY.

TO SHIRLEY.

AW...

OH, WATCH
THE FURNITURE, DEAR.

OH.

OKAY.

YEAH, LET'S JUST...

DINNER WAS DELICIOUS,
MRS. STRANG, THANK YOU.

YES.

OH, WELL, I WISH I COULD
TAKE ALL THE CREDIT FOR IT,

BUT THE CREDIT GOES TO
SYBIL.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT
I WOULD DO WITHOUT HER.

YOU COULD START BY LEARNING
TO LIGHT THE STOVE.

THAT'S ENOUGH
WINE, MOTHER.

SYBIL, DEAR,

WILL YOU, UH, HELP ME
IN THE KITCHEN?

PLEASE?

I AM SO GLAD THAT
BOTH OF YOU ARE HERE

TO HELP CELEBRATE
MY BIRTHDAY.

I SECOND THAT.

COUNT ME IN.

AND I WOULD LIKE
TO THANK YOU

FOR WELCOMING US
INTO YOUR HOME.

YOU CAN THANK ME.

I PAID FOR IT.

[CHUCKLING AWKWARDLY]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY,
SWEETHEART!

[GUSHING IN DELIGHT]

LOOK AT THAT!

[LAUGHING]

OH, THANKS, MOM.

THAT IS BEAUTIFUL.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

THANK YOU SO MUCH.

PHEW.

[LAUGHING]

UM, BAILEY,

OKAY.

OKAY...

OH, MY, THIS COULD
FEED AN ARMY.

[CHUCKLING]

YOU BETTER BE HUNGRY.

WHAT IS THIS?

THIS IS...

TONIGHT'S REAL SURPRISE.

OPEN IT.

BAILEY DALEY,

WILL YOU MARRY ME?

[LAUGHS IN SHOCK] YES!

[LAUGHING] YES.

YES.

[CLAPPING IN JOYFULLY]

[LAUGHING]

THESE ARE JUST
SOME OF THE DRESSES

THAT WE SELL AT STRANG'S.

MY PERSONAL FAVORITE...

OH, WOW.

IS THE ONE WITH
PEARL BEADS

AND A HIGH-NECK BODICE.

TRES ELEGANT.

[CHUCKLES]

YOU'D LOOK AMAZING
IN THAT, BAILEY.

YOU HAVE TO GET IT.

OH, IT'S GORGEOUS,

I JUST--I'M SURE
I COULD NOT AFFORD THIS.

OH, NO, LISTEN, DEAR,

LIKE I'VE TOLD YOU BEFORE,

ERIC'S FATHER AND I,

WE'RE HANDLING EVERYTHING,

SO NOT TO WORRY.

AND THAT'S AN ORDER.

[CHUCKLING]

OH, AND THAT YOU WEAR

GRANDMOTHER STRANG'S
RUBY EARRINGS

AS YOUR "SOMETHING OLD."

YES.

OH, I WAS GOING TO WEAR
THESE LITTLE PEARL EARRINGS

THAT MY DAD GAVE ME
FOR MY 10th BIRTHDAY.

PEARL?

BUT, HONEY,
THESE ARE RUBY.

THEY'RE ONE OF A KIND.

YOU COULDN'T EVEN
BUY THEM TODAY.

MM-HMM. NO,
THEY'LL BE PERFECT.

YOU'LL LOOK BEAUTIFUL.

SO, OUR TABLE SHOULD BE
IMMEDIATE FAMILY ONLY,

OF COURSE.

WAIT, WHAT ABOUT
AMBER AND TRAVIS?

UH, AMBER AND TRAVIS
CAN SIT... HERE...

WITH MY ASSISTANT,
AND HER MOTHER,

AND MY COUSINS
FROM NEWPORT.

WAIT, BUT THEY DON'T
KNOW THOSE PEOPLE.

WELL, NOW THEY WILL.

ALL RIGHT, WHY ARE WE EVEN
DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?

WE HAVEN'T
SENT OUT INVITATIONS?

WE DON'T KNOW WHO'S COMING.

OH, I'M JUST
GETTING A HEAD START

ON MY TIMELINE.

YOU HAVE A TIMELINE?

OH, YEAH.

I HAVE SCHEDULED
EVERY SINGLE THING

WE NEED TO DO
FOR THE WEDDING,

IN ORDER, FROM A TO Z.

TAKES OUT
ALL THE GUESSWORK.

LOOK AT THIS.

OH, WOW.

IT TAKES OUT
ALL THE SURPRISE, TOO, HUH?

EXACTLY.

HI, EVE.

NO, NO, NO, NO!

OH...

BAILEY, COME ON...

WHY-WHY AREN'T YOU--

EVE-- OKAY.

WHY AREN'T YOU TRAINING
THEM?

BECAUSE THEY'RE DOGS.

BECAUSE WE'RE AT THE PARK
AND THEY'RE BEING DOGS.

WELL THEN, THEY SHOULD BE
ON A LEASH AT ALL TIMES.

NO, THEY SHOULD NOT.

AND LOOK AT SHIRLEY,
SHE DOESN'T RUN AROUND.

WHAT ABOUT THAT?
I MEAN...

NO, I KNOW, THIS IS...

THIS IS WHAT SHE'S DOING.

THIS IS WHO SHE IS.

YOU KNOW, ALL DOGS
ARE DIFFERENT.

WELL, AT LEAST SHE DOESN'T
SLOBBER ALL OVER EVERYONE.

I MEAN, DO YOU KNOW
HOW MANY GERMS

ARE IN A DOG'S MOUTH?

HOW MANY THINGS
YOU CAN GET FROM THEM?

ALL KINDS OF STUFF--

NOPE, ZERO.

LOOK IT UP.

OKAY...

YOU KNOW WHAT, BAILEY,

SOMETIMES, I THINK
YOU CARE MORE ABOUT DOGS

THAN YOU DO ABOUT PEOPLE.

YOU REALLY
DON'T LIKE DOGS, DO YOU?

THEY'RE NOT MY THING.

THEY'RE YOUR THING, BAILEY.

I TOLD YOU THAT,
REMEMBER?

AND SHIRLEY...

YEAH, I GOT HER JUST FOR
YOU.

YOU KNOW, IF YOU CAN'T
UNDERSTAND MY LOVE OF DOGS,

THEN YOU CAN'T UNDERSTAND
ME.

WHAT DOES ONE THING
HAVE TO DO WITH ANOTHER?

[SIGHS]

I THINK
IF I HAVE TO EXPLAIN THAT...

I DON'T KNOW,
WE SHOULD BE...

WE SHOULD RECONSIDER
WHAT WE'RE DOING HERE.

RECONSIDER?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
RECONSIDER?

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
RECONSIDER WHAT?

BAILEY...

I'M GONNA GO.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
YOU'RE GOING TO GO?

WHERE ARE YOU
GOING TO--

SHIRLEY, COME HERE.

BAILEY...

GOOD GIRL.

WATCH YOUR HEAD, ADAM.

DON'T JUST LEAVE,
LET'S TALK ABOUT THIS.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE
THERE IS TO SAY.

LISTEN, YOU BASICALLY THINK

THAT MY PRIORITIES
ARE ALL OUT OF WHACK,

BUT YOU'RE MISSING
WHAT MAKES ME ME.

NO, YOU'RE WRONG.

I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT THAT IS,
AND IT'S FINE, REALLY.

"FINE?"

"FINE" IS LIKE SOMETHING
YOU SAY ABOUT THE WEATHER.

IT'S NOT HOW YOU TALK ABOUT
SOMEONE THAT YOU LOVE.

BAILEY, JUST...

PLEASE, JUST TELL ME
WHAT YOU WANT.

I WANT SHIRLEY.

WHAT?

COME HERE, GIRL.

YOU CAN'T JUST
TAKE SHIRLEY.

YOU JUST TOLD ME THAT
YOU GOT HER ONLY FOR ME.

BESIDES, NO DOG SHOULD LIVE
WHERE THEY'RE NOT WELCOME.

ERIC. WHY DIDN'T HE
JUST TELL ME

THAT HE DIDN'T WANT A DOG
IN THE FIRST PLACE?

IT WOULD HAVE SAVED US
SO MUCH TIME AND TROUBLE.

I THINK HE DID,

JUST NOT IN A WAY
YOU WERE HEARING.

MM.

TO BE FAIR,

I HAVEN'T BEEN
COMPLETELY HONEST WITH HIM.

I SAID "YES" TO GETTING
MARRIED
WHEN I REALLY MEANT,
"MAYBE."

WELL, NOW THAT WE'RE
ACTUALLY TALKING ABOUT THIS,

WHY DID YOU?

BECAUSE MEN LIKE ERIC
DON'T GROW ON TREES.

I THINK WE CAN AGREE ON
THAT.

NO OFFENSE TO TRAVIS.

NONE TAKEN.

I WISH TRAVIS
HAD HALF OF ERIC'S INTEREST

IN MARRIAGE.

THERE IS SUCH A THING

AS TOO MUCH
OF A GOOD THING, YOU KNOW.

YOU KNOW, ON OUR FIRST DATE,

WHEN ERIC BROUGHT THOSE
PICTURES
OF THE PERFECT GOLF SWING,

I THOUGHT, "LOOK,
THIS GUY IS SUPER-PREPARED."

BUT... A BIT OF OVERKILL,
RIGHT?

GOOD.

THAT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE
A DEAL-BREAKER.

JUST KEEP IT IN CHECK.

EVERYONE'S
GOT SOMETHING.

SPEAKING OF TOO MUCH
OF A GOOD THING...

MM-MM.

IF I MUST.

[CHUCKLING]

OH, GOOD GIRLS,

SAFELY CROSSING THE STREET.

COLE, HEY.

BAILEY, HEY!

SO, WHATEVER HAPPENED WITH
YOUR BOYFRIEND'S DOG?

I NEVER HEARD FROM YOU.

OH, UH--

WHOA, WHO'S THIS?

THIS IS ERIC'S--
MY SHIH TZU.

SHIRLEY.

SHIRLEY THE SHIH TZU?
SWEET!

[LAUGHS]

THOUGH HE DIDN'T SEEM LIKE
THE LITTLE DOG TYPE.

NO, HE'S NOT, REALLY.

HE'S NOT
THE "ANY DOG" TYPE.

HE JUST GOT HER FOR ME,
SO...

WELL, YOU GOTTA LOVE
THAT, RIGHT?

UH, I DO?

TAKING IN A DOG
IS A HUGE DEAL.

IF SOMEONE WENT TO
THAT KIND OF TROUBLE FOR ME,

I'D BE LIKE, "WHAT ARE YOU
DOING
THE REST OF YOUR LIFE?"

EVEN IF SHE DIDN'T REALLY
LOVE DOGS?

AS LONG AS SHE REALLY LOVED
ME,
I'D FIGURE IT OUT--

PROVIDED I LOVED HER BACK,
OF COURSE.

RIGHT.

BUT, YOU KNOW,

I'M A LITTLE PIE-IN-THE-SKY
ABOUT ALL THAT STUFF.

YEAH, I THOUGHT
I WAS, TOO.

HEY, WATCH THIS.

ADAM, CATCH.

OH!

GOOD CATCH.

OKAY, THERE YOU GO.

GOOD GIRL.

HERE, YOU WANT TO TRY.

SURE, HERE, TAKE SHIRLEY.

I'LL HOLD THE DOGS, AND...

OKAY, OKAY, SIT.

WAIT, WAIT...

[GIGGLES]

HE'S INCHING CLOSER
AND CLOSER.

OH, GOOD CATCH!

COOL, WELL, NEXT TIME,

WE'LL KICK IT UP A NOTCH
WITH TENNIS BALLS.

OH, MY, WE'LL HAVE
OUR WORK CUT OUT FOR US.

SHIRLEY...

AW, GREAT DOG.

YEAH, SHE IS.

IT WAS GOOD TO SEE YOU.

YOU TOO.

COME ON.

COME ON,
WE'RE GOING TO GO HOME NOW.

THAT IS NOT
THE END OF THE STORY.

IS IT?

HOW COULD IT BE
THE END OF THE STORY?

WE STILL DON'T KNOW WHY

SHE'S WEARING
THAT WEDDING DRESS!

OH, THANK YOU.

LOOK WHO JUST GOT
HIS SECOND WIND.

CONTINUE, PLEASE.

WELL, THE NEXT FEW DAYS
WERE PRETTY EMOTIONAL.

ERIC KEPT CALLING.

I COULDN'T ANSWER THE
PHONE...

OKAY, EASY, GUYS.
COME ON.

WE'VE GOT TO LET SHIRLEY
KEEP UP WITH US.

COME ON.

COME ON, SHIRLEY GIRL.

OH, I KNOW, HEY,
WE'RE SO CLOSE.

HI.

I WANTED TO SEE SHIRLEY,
AND GIVE HER THESE.

OH. WELL--

COME HERE, SHIRLEY.

WOW, I DIDN'T KNOW
SHE, UH,

LIKES TULIPS.

EXCEPT MAYBE TO NIBBLE ON.

YEAH, WHAT WAS I THINKING?

DO YOU KNOW WHAT,
I HAVE AN IDEA,

WOULD YOU LIKE TO HAVE THEM?

I GUESS I'D HATE TO SEE THEM
GO TO WASTE.

HERE.

TRADE?

YEAH. [CHUCKLING]

I GOT HER.

SO, HOW IS SHIRLEY?

ASK HER YOURSELF.

HEY, GIRL,
HOW YOU DOING?

HUH?

SHE SEEMS GOOD.

YEAH, SHE IS GOOD.

[GROANING]
THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

SHE'S LOOSENED UP A BIT,
YOU KNOW.

ADAM HAS THAT EFFECT
ON OTHER DOGS.

YEAH?

YEAH.

BAILEY, I HAVE
TO SAY SOMETHING.

I MAY NOT...

LOVE DOGS AS MUCH
AS YOU DO, BUT...

I DO LOVE YOU.

HOW MUCH? [CHUCKLES]

VERY, VERY MUCH.

AND I'M...

I'M JUST HOPING
YOU STILL LOVE ME, TOO.

I DO.

I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH.

-YOU DO?
-I DO.

THIS IS REALLY GREAT,
YOU KNOW WHY?

[LAUGHING] WHY?

BECAUSE ACCORDING
TO MY SCHEDULE,

WE STILL CAN SEND OUT
THE INVITATIONS IN TIME

AND MAKE OUR
ORIGINAL WEDDING DATE.

THAT IS GOOD NEWS.

I KNOW.

INVITATIONS, CHECK.

CAKE, CHECK--

WAIT, DID WE DECIDE ON

A LEMON CAKE
WITH VANILLA FROSTING,

OR THE VANILLA CAKE
WITH LEMON FROSTING?

WHAT? NO, NO, NEITHER.

WE CHOSE THE RASPBERRY
BLACK SATIN FUDGE CAKE.

NO, YOU CHOSE THAT ONE.

I SAID SOMETHING LIGHTER
WOULD BE NICE.

BUT, BABE,
THAT BLACK SATIN CAKE,

I MEAN, THAT MAKES
A STATEMENT.

AND, DON'T FORGET,

THAT'S CHEF DUBOIS'
SIGNATURE DESSERT.

OKAY, PHOTOGRAPHER, CHECK.

VIDEOGRAPHER, CHECK.

WALTZ LESSONS,
WALTZ LESSONS--

WE STILL HAVE TO SCHEDULE
THOSE.

OKAY, SO,

LET'S TALK ABOUT THE WALTZ.

I'M ENVISIONING
SOMETHING DIFFERENT

FOR OUR FIRST DANCE.

LOOK, BAILEY, WE STRANGS
ARE A FAMILY OF WALTZERS.

I MEAN, THIS HAS BEEN
A WEDDING TRADITION

FOR, LIKE, FOREVER!

YOU'LL LOVE IT, YOU'LL SEE.

MUSIC, CHECK.

WEDDING DRESS, CHECK.

AMBER'S DRESS, CHECK.

UNCHECK.

SHE'S REALLY--SHE'S NOT
INTO THE WHOLE SUIT THING.

SO, ONE OF THOSE OTHER
OPTIONS
THAT WE LOOKED AT,

THE LIGHTER-COLORED ONES?

YEAH, BUT THE WHOLE POINT

WAS FOR HER DRESS TO MATCH
THE ROSES IN THE
CENTERPIECES,

SO, I'M SORRY,
THAT ONE'S NOT NEGOTIABLE.

[MUTTERING] GOT THOSE.
HAIRCUTS...

DID I GET A HAIRCUT?

YES, I DID.

BAILEY,
FOR PETE'S SAKE,

YOU HAVE TO STOP SHAKING,

I CANNOT GET THIS DRESS
ZIPPED UP.

IT'S SO COLD.

ISN'T IT FREEZING IN HERE?

MM-MM, NO,
IT'S ACTUALLY REALLY WARM.

THE ONLY THING THAT'S
FREEZING
ARE THE DAIQUIRIS.

OKAY, THERE, HOW'S THAT?

OH, SO TIGHT.

IT'S SO MUCH TIGHTER
THAN IT WAS.

I CAN'T REALLY BREATHE.

HONEY, IT FITS YOU
PERFECTLY.

YOU LOOK WONDERFUL.

OKAY...

AND DONE.

THANKS. OKAY.

GORGEOUS.

THANKS.

I AM SO SORRY...

ABOUT THE SUIT.

AH...

[SIGHS NERVOUSLY]

OKAY, UM,

I'M GOING TO GO
DOWNSTAIRS AND FIND TRAVIS.

[SIGHS EMOTIONALLY]

OKAY, NO, I PROMISE
I WON'T CRY UNTIL AFTER.

YEAH.

YOU LOOK SO GORGEOUS.

OH, BAILEY...

YOU LOOK
GORGEOUS.

THANKS.

BYE.

SHE'S RIGHT, YOU KNOW,

YOU'RE THE PRETTIEST BRIDE
EVER.

OH, I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT.

I'VE SEEN YOUR PICTURES.

HOW ARE YOU FEELING, HONEY?

BESIDES THE FACT THAT
I CAN'T REALLY BREATHE

AND I MIGHT PASS OUT?

I'M GOOD.

YEAH, I'M GOOD.

I SO WISH YOUR FATHER
WAS HERE TO SEE THIS.

HE WOULD HAVE BEEN
SO PROUD OF YOU.

WHEN DID YOU KNOW
THAT HE WAS...

YOU KNOW, THE ONE?

[CHUCKLES]

YOU KNOW WHAT,

IT WAS ACTUALLY

WHEN WE WERE
STANDING UP THERE

ABOUT TO GET MARRIED.

I LOOKED AT HIM

LIKE I HAD NEVER
SEEN HIM BEFORE,

AND I JUST KNEW,

HE WAS MY SOULMATE.

AND HE WOULD LOVE ME
FOR EXACTLY WHO I WAS,

AND ME, HIM,
COME RAIN OR SHINE.

HAVE I EVER TOLD YOU

YOU'RE THE BEST MOM
IN THE WORLD?

YOU DON'T HAVE TO.

[CHUCKLES FONDLY] OKAY.

ALL RIGHT.

BEAUTIFUL, ARE YOU READY

TO BECOME
MRS. ERIC STRANG?

I'LL BE OUT IN ONE MINUTE.

I LOVE YOU.

I LOVE YOU, TOO.

[SIGHING]

WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK?

AM I DOING THE RIGHT THING?

IS ERIC MY SOULMATE,
COME RAIN OR COME SHINE?

AM I HIS?

I'M TALKING TO DOGS.

OKAY.

[LAUGHS]
LET'S GET MARRIED!

[♪♪♪]

DEAR FRIENDS AND FAMILY,

WE ARE GATHERED HERE TODAY

TO WITNESS AND CELEBRATE

THE JOINING OF BAILEY AND
ERIC

IN HOLY MATRIMONY.

AND DO YOU, BAILEY,

TAKE ERIC

TO BE YOUR LAWFULLY
WEDDED HUSBAND?

FOR BETTER OR FOR WORSE,

FOR RICHER, FOR POORER,

IN SICKNESS
AND IN HEALTH,

TO LOVE, AND TO CHERISH

TILL DEATH DO YOU PART?

[STAMMERS QUIETLY] N-NO.

NO, I...

NO, I DON'T. I'M...

ERIC, I'M SO SORRY.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

I WANTED TO BE

WHO YOU WANT ME TO BE,

BUT I'M...

I'M NOT THAT PERSON.

WE CAN'T...

DO IT LIKE THAT.

BAILEY, WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT?

YOU KNOW YOU DON'T
BELIEVE THAT.

NOW, JUST, COME ON,
GET IT TOGETHER, AND--

I REALLY BELIEVE THAT.

ANY WOMAN
WOULD BE SO LUCKY

TO BE STANDING HERE WITH
YOU,

BUT YOU'VE HAD
THIS WHOLE THING PLANNED
OUT,

YOU KNOW, YOUR WHOLE LIFE
PLANNED OUT,

AND IT JUST--
IT WASN'T MY PLAN.

WHAT ARE YOU...

I'M SO SORRY.

COME HERE.

COME ON.

[CROWD MURMURING IN CONCERN]

[RAIN POURING]

SO, I GUESS...

I JUST REALIZED, YOU KNOW,

THAT I CAN'T FIND THE RIGHT
MAN

BY TRYING TO BE
THE RIGHT WOMAN FOR HIM.

I JUST HAVE TO BE...

YOU KNOW, YOU HAVE TO
BE TRUE TO YOURSELF,

AND THEN THE REST
FALLS INTO PLACE, HOPEFULLY.

THAT'S BEAUTIFUL,
BAILEY.

SEE, HE'S JUST A BIG
SOFTIE AFTER ALL.

AW...

[CHUCKLING]

[GIGGLES]

YOU TWO REALLY
LOVE EACH OTHER, DON'T YOU?

YEAH, WE'RE, UH,
WE'RE PRETTY INSEPARABLE.

YEAH, AND NOT JUST BECAUSE
OF THIS JOINT, EITHER.

OH, HONEY...

I HOPE TO SOMEDAY HAVE
WHAT YOU HAVE.

YOU KNOW WHAT,
SWEETIE,

I WAS JUST ABOUT YOUR AGE
WHEN I STARTED WORKING HERE.

I WOULD STAND BEHIND
THAT COUNTER EVERY DAY,

WAITING FOR
MY PRINCE CHARMING

TO COME WALKING
THROUGH THE DOOR.

GUYS CAME IN,
AND GUYS WENT OUT,

AND GUESS WHAT?

THERE WAS NOT
A SINGLE PRINCE AMONG THEM.

[CHUCKLES]
AND THEN, ONE DAY,

RIGHT OUTTA THE BLUE,

THIS ONE SAYS TO ME,

"HOW ABOUT
WE GO OUT SOMETIME?"

AND I'M LIKE,
"GO OUT WHERE?"

[LAUGHS]

HE'S LIKE,
"ON A DATE, DUMMY!"

[LAUGHING]

AND PRETTY MUCH

THE REST IS HISTORY.

[CHUCKLES]
ANCIENT HISTORY.

[LAUGHS] YOU SPEAK
FOR YOURSELF.

THE POINT IS, HONEY,

SOMETIMES--

SOMETIMES, THOSE ANSWERS
ARE RIGHT IN FRONT OF US.

WE JUST HAVE TO
OPEN UP OUR EYES

AND SEE THEM.

[DINER]: A KIND AND
BEAUTIFUL
WOMAN ONCE TOLD ME

"DOGS LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY.

"IF YOU FIND SOMEONE
WHO CAN LOVE YOU LIKE A DOG,

YOU JUST MAY HAVE FOUND
TRUE LOVE."

COLE?

HI, BAILEY.

GOOD STORY.

[GROANS IN EMBARRASSMENT]

YOU'VE BEEN SITTING THERE
THE WHOLE TIME?

OH, HONEY,
HE'S HERE EVERY NIGHT.

REALLY. TILL CLOSING
AND SOMETIMES AFTER.

SITTING OVER THERE,
HUNCHED OVER A BOOK.

YOU KNOW THIS GUY?

YEAH.

WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY
SOMETHING?

I DON'T KNOW,
I GUESS I JUST ENJOYED

HEARING THE SOUND OF YOUR
VOICE.

AH...

OKAY, I'M... I'M STILL
KIND OF EMBARRASSED,
ACTUALLY,

ABOUT EVERYTHING I TOLD YOU

AT THAT PARTY.

ARE YOU KIDDING?

THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL.

BESIDES, I'VE HAD THE
BIGGEST,
BADDEST CRUSH ON YOU

EVER SINCE.

OKAY, SO NOW YOU'VE HEARD
ALL OF THAT...

WHAT CAN I SAY?

I'M A GONER.

WHY DIDN'T YOU EVER
ASK ME OUT?

YOU WERE ALWAYS SEEING
SOMEONE,
OR BREAKING UP WITH SOMEONE,

AND IT WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN
RIGHT.

THAT'S SO NOT WHO I AM.

I REALLY HAVE NEVER
DATED AROUND MUCH.

IT'S JUST BEEN--

IT'S A CRAZY TIME.

WELL, I THINK YOU'RE GREAT,
JUST THE WAY YOU ARE.

[CHUCKLING AWKWARDLY]

[CHUCKLING]

[CLUCKING TO DOGS]
HERE WE GO.

THAT WAS
QUITE THE STORY.

[LAUGHS] WELL, YEAH.

SO...

WHERE ARE YOU
GOING NOW?

UM...

I DON'T KNOW.

I'M NOT TIRED, THOUGH.

WELL, HOW WOULD
YOU AND THE DOGS

LIKE TO MEET
MY NEW BEAGLE, FLAPJACK?

A BEAGLE?

OH, BOY.

I THINK
WE'D LIKE THAT.

COOL.

WHICH WAY?

ALL RIGHT.

[♪♪♪]

YOU MUST BE
FREEZING.

ADAM... GOOD BOY.

[♪♪♪]

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