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1
00:00:03,742 --> 00:00:06,176
( Jack Jones' "The
Love Boat" playing )
2
00:00:12,360 --> 00:00:14,631
♪ Love ♪
3
00:00:16,168 --> 00:00:18,672
♪ Exciting and new ♪
4
00:00:20,245 --> 00:00:22,381
♪ Come aboard ♪
5
00:00:24,288 --> 00:00:27,972
♪ We're expecting you ♪
6
00:00:27,996 --> 00:00:30,499
♪ And love ♪
7
00:00:32,206 --> 00:00:36,223
♪ Life's sweetest reward ♪
8
00:00:36,247 --> 00:00:38,450
♪ Let it flow ♪
9
00:00:40,191 --> 00:00:44,376
♪ It floats back to you ♪
10
00:00:44,400 --> 00:00:47,785
♪ The Love Boat ♪
11
00:00:47,809 --> 00:00:52,561
♪ Soon will be
making Another run ♪
12
00:00:52,586 --> 00:00:55,803
♪ The Love Boat ♪
13
00:00:55,827 --> 00:01:00,446
♪ Promises something
For everyone ♪
14
00:01:00,470 --> 00:01:02,853
♪ Set a course for adventure ♪
15
00:01:02,877 --> 00:01:06,983
♪ Your mind on a new romance ♪
16
00:01:08,856 --> 00:01:12,440
♪ And love ♪
17
00:01:12,464 --> 00:01:15,102
♪ Won't hurt anymore ♪
18
00:01:16,640 --> 00:01:20,660
♪ It's an open smile ♪
19
00:01:20,684 --> 00:01:24,737
♪ On a friendly shore ♪
20
00:01:24,761 --> 00:01:29,379
♪ It's love ♪
21
00:01:29,403 --> 00:01:35,013
♪ Welcome aboard It's love ♪
22
00:01:39,393 --> 00:01:41,330
( upbeat theme playing )
23
00:02:04,184 --> 00:02:06,965
Excuse me, how
long before we sail?
24
00:02:06,989 --> 00:02:10,140
Oh, about another
half an hour, sir.
25
00:02:10,164 --> 00:02:11,510
Thank you. Don't worry.
26
00:02:11,534 --> 00:02:12,713
She'll make it.
27
00:02:12,737 --> 00:02:13,850
Pardon me?
28
00:02:13,874 --> 00:02:17,356
Well, I figure a
handsome man like you...
29
00:02:17,380 --> 00:02:19,383
Well, thank you again. Mm-hm.
30
00:02:22,760 --> 00:02:24,696
( foghorn blowing )
31
00:02:28,138 --> 00:02:30,386
Uh, yes, sir, that's, uh,
the late-sitting dinner.
32
00:02:30,410 --> 00:02:33,160
Eight o'clock. Thank
you. Welcome aboard.
33
00:02:33,184 --> 00:02:34,429
Uh, ma'am, yes.
34
00:02:34,453 --> 00:02:38,839
Mrs. Corwin, you're
in 130, Fiesta Deck.
35
00:02:38,863 --> 00:02:41,880
Me? I'm standing right here.
36
00:02:41,904 --> 00:02:44,821
You must have me mixed
up with another Mrs. Corwin.
37
00:02:44,845 --> 00:02:47,960
No, ma'am, I meant your
cabin's on Fiesta Deck.
38
00:02:47,984 --> 00:02:49,832
Room 130.
39
00:02:49,856 --> 00:02:51,859
Oh, thank you.
40
00:02:52,829 --> 00:02:54,408
Hi. Welcome aboard.
41
00:02:54,432 --> 00:02:56,847
Uh, let's see...
Okay, you first.
42
00:02:56,871 --> 00:02:59,086
Uh, that's Aloha Deck.
That's right through here.
43
00:02:59,110 --> 00:03:01,024
Cabin 325.
44
00:03:01,048 --> 00:03:02,394
Now, let's see...
Oh, Doc, listen,
45
00:03:02,418 --> 00:03:04,165
give me a hand, will
you? I'm going crazy here.
46
00:03:04,189 --> 00:03:05,166
Are you kidding?
47
00:03:05,190 --> 00:03:06,836
I'm a physician,
not a room clerk.
48
00:03:06,860 --> 00:03:07,961
( sighs )
49
00:03:09,935 --> 00:03:12,550
Well, maybe just
this once. Excuse me.
50
00:03:12,574 --> 00:03:14,555
Uh, excuse me. Well, hi.
51
00:03:14,579 --> 00:03:15,891
Welcome aboard.
52
00:03:15,915 --> 00:03:17,427
Uh, thanks, Doc. I'll take over.
53
00:03:17,451 --> 00:03:19,733
Hi. I'm Yeoman Purser Smith.
54
00:03:19,757 --> 00:03:21,071
Dr. Adam Bricker.
55
00:03:21,095 --> 00:03:22,740
I'm Melanie Taylor, and...
56
00:03:22,765 --> 00:03:25,127
And this is my friend Jane Cole.
57
00:03:26,138 --> 00:03:27,517
And if you'll help
us find our cabin,
58
00:03:27,541 --> 00:03:28,787
you'll have a friend for life.
59
00:03:28,811 --> 00:03:29,958
I'll not only help you find it,
60
00:03:29,982 --> 00:03:31,695
I'll move in with you.
61
00:03:31,719 --> 00:03:34,134
Well, with Jane and
me and only two beds,
62
00:03:34,158 --> 00:03:36,171
I think it'll be a little
bit crowded, don't you?
63
00:03:36,195 --> 00:03:38,275
Oh, I don't mind
doubling up if you don't.
64
00:03:38,299 --> 00:03:39,880
BRICKER: Ah.
65
00:03:39,904 --> 00:03:41,918
As the ship's official
medical representative,
66
00:03:41,942 --> 00:03:43,122
I have to veto that idea.
67
00:03:43,146 --> 00:03:45,893
Overcrowded cabins are
a serious health hazard.
68
00:03:45,917 --> 00:03:48,332
Oh, and... And what do
you suggest we do, doctor?
69
00:03:48,356 --> 00:03:51,974
Well, come to my cabin instead.
70
00:03:51,998 --> 00:03:55,081
Can I come too? I always
wanted to see how doctors operate.
71
00:03:55,105 --> 00:03:58,521
Here you go, guys. You're in
Cabin C-122 on the Coral Deck.
72
00:03:58,545 --> 00:04:00,326
Have a wonderful cruise.
73
00:04:00,350 --> 00:04:02,231
Thanks, babe.
74
00:04:02,255 --> 00:04:03,903
Hello, beautiful lady.
75
00:04:03,927 --> 00:04:06,974
Hi. I'm Mike Andrews. This
is my friend Doug Ketcham.
76
00:04:06,998 --> 00:04:09,648
And we've come to
rescue you from this, uh,
77
00:04:09,672 --> 00:04:11,252
dangerous nautical type.
78
00:04:11,276 --> 00:04:12,956
Do I look like I need rescuing?
79
00:04:12,980 --> 00:04:15,929
You really can't trust a
grown man in a sailor suit.
80
00:04:15,953 --> 00:04:17,901
Okay, then I'll put
on my stethoscope.
81
00:04:17,925 --> 00:04:19,872
We could play doctor.
82
00:04:19,896 --> 00:04:22,044
Uh, Melanie, I-I don't
want to scare you,
83
00:04:22,068 --> 00:04:24,182
but if you attract any more
guys to this side of the ship,
84
00:04:24,206 --> 00:04:25,238
it's gonna list.
85
00:04:26,676 --> 00:04:27,777
Thank you.
86
00:04:29,718 --> 00:04:31,098
Hm.
87
00:04:31,122 --> 00:04:34,038
And you are on
Promenade Deck, Cabin 340,
88
00:04:34,062 --> 00:04:35,173
and that's the early sitting.
89
00:04:35,197 --> 00:04:36,508
Thank you. Welcome aboard.
90
00:04:36,532 --> 00:04:38,480
Uh... Uh, can't you
process the passengers
91
00:04:38,504 --> 00:04:40,752
more efficiently, purser? I
mean, I've been standing here
92
00:04:40,776 --> 00:04:42,790
for three minutes and
14 seconds by the clock.
93
00:04:42,814 --> 00:04:44,028
Well, I'm sorry, sir.
94
00:04:44,052 --> 00:04:45,763
Everybody's just
boarding at once.
95
00:04:45,787 --> 00:04:47,335
That's, uh, 21 seconds.
96
00:04:47,359 --> 00:04:48,704
The name is Waterman.
97
00:04:48,728 --> 00:04:50,297
Waterman.
98
00:04:53,307 --> 00:04:54,285
Dusty.
99
00:04:54,309 --> 00:04:56,488
Mr. Dusty Waterman.
100
00:04:56,512 --> 00:04:58,226
Uh, Marvin.
101
00:04:58,250 --> 00:04:59,462
Oh, Dusty Marvin.
102
00:04:59,486 --> 00:05:01,500
Good, I don't have a Waterman.
103
00:05:01,524 --> 00:05:04,141
But, Gopher, I can't
find Fiesta Deck.
104
00:05:04,165 --> 00:05:05,809
Well, I'm sure it's
where we left it, ma'am.
105
00:05:05,833 --> 00:05:08,082
Listen, just through the
lobby, into the elevator
106
00:05:08,106 --> 00:05:10,320
and down a floor.
Oh, thank you, Gopher.
107
00:05:10,344 --> 00:05:11,857
Not at all. Oh,
108
00:05:11,881 --> 00:05:13,362
and I've forgotten
my cabin number
109
00:05:13,386 --> 00:05:15,999
and I don't know
what time dinner is.
110
00:05:16,023 --> 00:05:17,603
One-thirty.
111
00:05:17,627 --> 00:05:19,664
Isn't that early for dinner?
112
00:05:20,802 --> 00:05:22,315
No, that's your cabin number.
113
00:05:22,339 --> 00:05:24,087
Dinner is at 8.
114
00:05:24,111 --> 00:05:25,255
Oh.
115
00:05:25,279 --> 00:05:26,890
Now I've got
everything straight.
116
00:05:26,914 --> 00:05:27,893
GOPHER: Good.
117
00:05:27,917 --> 00:05:30,800
Where's the lobby?
118
00:05:30,824 --> 00:05:32,505
Close your eyes.
119
00:05:32,529 --> 00:05:33,930
( sighs )
120
00:05:35,469 --> 00:05:37,149
Ta-da!
121
00:05:37,173 --> 00:05:38,685
Oh, thank you, Gopher.
122
00:05:38,709 --> 00:05:40,457
( chuckles ) Uh,
Marvin Waterman.
123
00:05:40,481 --> 00:05:43,063
It's been exactly five minutes,
18 seconds on the nose.
124
00:05:43,087 --> 00:05:44,567
Yes, sir.
125
00:05:44,591 --> 00:05:48,008
( speaking in foreign language )
126
00:05:48,032 --> 00:05:49,411
GOPHER: Hi.
127
00:05:49,435 --> 00:05:51,883
Uh, Zidreczky, Zidreczky.
128
00:05:51,907 --> 00:05:55,791
Oh, Zidreczky. Oh...
Ah, Mr. Zidreczky,
129
00:05:55,815 --> 00:05:58,097
uh, I'm taking
care of Mr., uh...?
130
00:05:58,121 --> 00:05:59,099
Waterman.
131
00:05:59,124 --> 00:06:02,863
Uh... Uh, you wait.
132
00:06:03,802 --> 00:06:05,113
Wait.
133
00:06:05,137 --> 00:06:10,225
You, uh, Promenade
Deck, three... Three.
134
00:06:10,249 --> 00:06:11,729
Can I just show you? Yes.
135
00:06:11,753 --> 00:06:13,800
WATERMAN: Obviously
a language barrier.
136
00:06:13,824 --> 00:06:16,972
Just go up these
stairs and turn right.
137
00:06:16,997 --> 00:06:20,114
So why don't you just slip into
something casual and have fun.
138
00:06:20,138 --> 00:06:22,141
This is something casual.
139
00:06:25,082 --> 00:06:26,283
Gopher.
140
00:06:27,922 --> 00:06:30,505
You should hear this too.
141
00:06:30,529 --> 00:06:34,048
I just had a tip from one of
my friends at the head office.
142
00:06:34,072 --> 00:06:37,187
A line is sending one of
their inspectors on this cruise.
143
00:06:37,211 --> 00:06:39,024
Now, he'll be
checking up on all of us
144
00:06:39,048 --> 00:06:42,566
and sending back a report
on how we perform our duties.
145
00:06:42,590 --> 00:06:44,104
Now, my advice to all of you is:
146
00:06:44,128 --> 00:06:45,906
watch your step.
147
00:06:45,930 --> 00:06:47,143
What's the problem, sir?
148
00:06:47,167 --> 00:06:48,946
We'll treat him like a king.
149
00:06:48,970 --> 00:06:50,083
STUBING: The problem is,
150
00:06:50,107 --> 00:06:51,085
I don't know who he is.
151
00:06:51,109 --> 00:06:53,325
Could be anyone on the ship.
152
00:06:53,349 --> 00:06:55,483
Well, it's not me.
That narrows it down.
153
00:06:57,089 --> 00:06:59,304
Sir, you have
nothing to worry about.
154
00:06:59,328 --> 00:07:00,941
We're a great crew.
155
00:07:00,965 --> 00:07:05,685
Sure. When it comes to services,
we cover the bases from A to Z.
156
00:07:05,709 --> 00:07:09,295
Z! Oh, I left Mr. Zidreczky
out on the deck.
157
00:07:09,319 --> 00:07:10,730
( sighs )
158
00:07:10,754 --> 00:07:13,057
We better start worrying.
159
00:07:16,667 --> 00:07:17,746
Sarah.
160
00:07:17,770 --> 00:07:18,748
Hi.
161
00:07:18,772 --> 00:07:19,851
BOTH: Oh.
162
00:07:19,875 --> 00:07:22,056
Baby... ( laughs )
163
00:07:22,081 --> 00:07:23,227
you look gorgeous.
164
00:07:23,251 --> 00:07:24,730
Oh.
165
00:07:24,754 --> 00:07:27,402
I couldn't have changed
that much in three weeks.
166
00:07:27,426 --> 00:07:30,976
I don't know. Three weeks
without you is much, much more
167
00:07:31,000 --> 00:07:32,848
than 21 days.
168
00:07:32,872 --> 00:07:35,687
No wonder he was nervous.
She's worth waiting for.
169
00:07:35,711 --> 00:07:36,989
Well, he's not exactly
170
00:07:37,013 --> 00:07:40,019
yesterday's mashed
potatoes either.
171
00:07:41,559 --> 00:07:43,240
Worth waiting for, isn't she?
172
00:07:43,264 --> 00:07:45,243
That's what Doc was just saying.
173
00:07:45,267 --> 00:07:48,183
And then Julie said
you're... Uh, excuse me.
174
00:07:48,207 --> 00:07:49,954
You're Mr., uh...? Sherwood.
175
00:07:49,978 --> 00:07:51,659
Brian Sherwood.
176
00:07:51,683 --> 00:07:55,132
And this is Mrs. Sarah Lambert.
177
00:07:55,157 --> 00:07:56,302
Well, how do you do?
178
00:07:56,326 --> 00:07:57,304
Hi.
179
00:07:57,328 --> 00:07:58,307
JULIE: Let's see.
180
00:07:58,331 --> 00:08:00,578
Mr. Sherwood,
you're in Cabin 350
181
00:08:00,602 --> 00:08:01,948
on the Promenade Deck.
182
00:08:01,972 --> 00:08:04,821
And Mrs. Lambert...
Well, what do you know?
183
00:08:04,845 --> 00:08:07,294
You're right next
door, Cabin 348.
184
00:08:07,318 --> 00:08:09,933
They're connected. Thank you.
185
00:08:09,957 --> 00:08:11,637
You didn't have
to get two rooms.
186
00:08:11,661 --> 00:08:14,077
Well, I thought you
might like some privacy.
187
00:08:14,101 --> 00:08:16,347
Besides, I didn't want
to tarnish your reputation.
188
00:08:16,371 --> 00:08:17,584
( giggles )
189
00:08:17,608 --> 00:08:20,524
( foghorn blowing )
190
00:08:20,548 --> 00:08:22,484
( upbeat theme playing )
191
00:08:24,324 --> 00:08:26,259
( all cheering and shouting )
192
00:08:54,527 --> 00:08:56,461
( foghorn blowing )
193
00:09:06,753 --> 00:09:09,838
You know, that
Mike is really cute.
194
00:09:09,862 --> 00:09:11,542
I've got my eye on him.
195
00:09:11,566 --> 00:09:13,212
Yeah, and if you saw
the look in his eyes,
196
00:09:13,237 --> 00:09:14,615
you'd know the
feeling is mutual.
197
00:09:14,639 --> 00:09:16,752
( sighs ) Not to mention
the other three guys.
198
00:09:16,776 --> 00:09:18,456
You're gonna have
a ball, as usual.
199
00:09:18,480 --> 00:09:19,660
Well, you are too.
200
00:09:19,684 --> 00:09:21,029
Oh, I don't know.
201
00:09:21,053 --> 00:09:23,236
I wish you never talked me
into coming on this cruise.
202
00:09:23,260 --> 00:09:24,806
Why?
203
00:09:24,830 --> 00:09:27,210
Well, because this is
your scene, not mine.
204
00:09:27,234 --> 00:09:29,449
And I'm afraid I'm
gonna be a drag to you.
205
00:09:29,473 --> 00:09:32,857
Oh, you are not. Now, come
on, none of this negative stuff.
206
00:09:32,881 --> 00:09:34,662
We're both gonna
have a great time,
207
00:09:34,686 --> 00:09:36,665
and we're gonna
have lots of dates.
208
00:09:36,689 --> 00:09:39,272
Yeah, you'll get the
dates and I'll get the pits.
209
00:09:39,296 --> 00:09:40,708
( chuckles )
210
00:09:40,732 --> 00:09:42,668
( mellow theme playing )
211
00:09:47,481 --> 00:09:50,197
You mean, the front office
sent somebody onboard
212
00:09:50,221 --> 00:09:51,401
to check up on us?
213
00:09:51,425 --> 00:09:52,669
Yeah, but as Julie says,
214
00:09:52,693 --> 00:09:55,006
we don't have
anything to worry about.
215
00:09:55,030 --> 00:09:57,213
Hey, we're a terrific crew.
216
00:09:57,237 --> 00:09:58,214
I don't know.
217
00:09:58,238 --> 00:09:59,719
A friend of mine, Cleofus,
218
00:09:59,743 --> 00:10:02,392
now, he thought he was
part of a pretty good crew too.
219
00:10:02,416 --> 00:10:04,764
But after the inspector
came on his ship,
220
00:10:04,788 --> 00:10:07,636
they fired the engineer,
the cruise director
221
00:10:07,660 --> 00:10:09,508
and half the kitchen staff.
222
00:10:09,532 --> 00:10:13,049
Boy, that guy must've
been pretty tough.
223
00:10:13,073 --> 00:10:14,454
CORWIN: Uh, excuse me,
224
00:10:14,478 --> 00:10:16,188
can you tell me where
the doctor's office is?
225
00:10:16,212 --> 00:10:18,160
Oh, I'm the doctor.
226
00:10:18,184 --> 00:10:19,898
Is anything bothering you?
227
00:10:19,922 --> 00:10:21,736
No.
228
00:10:21,760 --> 00:10:24,942
Well, then, uh, why are you
looking for the doctor's office?
229
00:10:24,966 --> 00:10:28,016
Well, just in case
something was bothering me,
230
00:10:28,040 --> 00:10:29,883
I wanted to know where to go.
231
00:10:30,981 --> 00:10:32,461
But it wouldn't matter anyway,
232
00:10:32,485 --> 00:10:34,366
because if I went there,
you wouldn't be there.
233
00:10:34,390 --> 00:10:35,734
You'd be here.
234
00:10:35,758 --> 00:10:39,310
Well, in that case,
they'd page me
235
00:10:39,335 --> 00:10:41,537
and I'd come to you
wherever you were.
236
00:10:43,344 --> 00:10:47,093
Well, if you'd come
to me wherever I was,
237
00:10:47,117 --> 00:10:49,589
then what do you
need an office for?
238
00:10:55,870 --> 00:10:57,518
She could be the inspector.
239
00:10:57,542 --> 00:11:01,594
It's obvious they aren't gonna
send us anybody too obvious.
240
00:11:01,618 --> 00:11:02,864
Obviously.
241
00:11:02,888 --> 00:11:06,538
But she's so unobvious
it makes her obvious.
242
00:11:06,562 --> 00:11:08,510
Ah. I didn't think of that.
243
00:11:08,534 --> 00:11:09,601
Obviously.
244
00:11:11,039 --> 00:11:12,686
( softly ): Aha.
245
00:11:12,710 --> 00:11:16,461
I think I know who
the inspector is.
246
00:11:16,485 --> 00:11:20,358
Did you ever see a more
suspicious-looking pair of legs?
247
00:11:26,140 --> 00:11:27,754
We can't take any chances.
248
00:11:27,778 --> 00:11:31,263
Uh-uh. I'd better
go investigate.
249
00:11:31,287 --> 00:11:33,223
( mellow theme playing )
250
00:11:35,929 --> 00:11:37,610
BRICKER: Hi.
251
00:11:37,634 --> 00:11:39,068
( chuckles )
252
00:11:42,612 --> 00:11:43,659
Thank you. Mm-hm.
253
00:11:43,683 --> 00:11:45,260
Thank you, Isaac. Sure.
254
00:11:45,284 --> 00:11:48,100
Oh, would you, uh, start
a tab for me, please?
255
00:11:48,124 --> 00:11:50,138
Uh, Promenade Cabin 348.
256
00:11:50,162 --> 00:11:53,112
No, I'm in 348. You're
in 350. Oh, that's right.
257
00:11:53,136 --> 00:11:55,283
Cabin 350, please.
Oh, I'd better watch you.
258
00:11:55,307 --> 00:11:57,590
You know it's pretty tough
when a guy can't sneak a drink
259
00:11:57,614 --> 00:11:58,992
through on a girl's bill.
260
00:11:59,016 --> 00:12:00,451
( coughing )
261
00:12:02,992 --> 00:12:04,005
You okay?
262
00:12:04,029 --> 00:12:05,205
Oh, fine.
263
00:12:05,230 --> 00:12:06,910
Just, uh, add a
little cough syrup
264
00:12:06,934 --> 00:12:08,179
to my next martini, will you?
265
00:12:08,203 --> 00:12:09,851
Is there any other
way to make 'em?
266
00:12:09,875 --> 00:12:11,209
( chuckles )
267
00:12:12,347 --> 00:12:13,349
Well...
268
00:12:14,553 --> 00:12:18,102
to, uh... our time together.
269
00:12:18,126 --> 00:12:20,096
That's my favorite toast.
270
00:12:25,075 --> 00:12:26,354
How's your husband?
271
00:12:26,378 --> 00:12:29,619
You never can bring yourself
to call him by his name.
272
00:12:30,755 --> 00:12:33,037
Fred. How is he?
273
00:12:33,061 --> 00:12:34,995
He's well.
274
00:12:36,467 --> 00:12:37,582
And the marriage?
275
00:12:37,606 --> 00:12:38,850
Better.
276
00:12:38,874 --> 00:12:40,287
Not good, but better.
277
00:12:40,311 --> 00:12:42,927
Are you planning
to stay with him?
278
00:12:42,951 --> 00:12:45,533
I think so.
279
00:12:45,557 --> 00:12:46,823
For the children.
280
00:12:49,299 --> 00:12:51,246
That's always a
difficult decision.
281
00:12:51,270 --> 00:12:53,083
Very.
282
00:12:53,107 --> 00:12:57,259
Let's see, you've been
divorced for four years now.
283
00:12:57,283 --> 00:12:59,588
Look how long you stayed
married for your children.
284
00:13:01,895 --> 00:13:04,243
If you ever decide... Please.
285
00:13:04,267 --> 00:13:07,015
This is supposed to
be our time together
286
00:13:07,039 --> 00:13:09,208
away from the rest of the world.
287
00:13:11,148 --> 00:13:12,461
You're right.
288
00:13:12,485 --> 00:13:13,487
I'm sorry.
289
00:13:16,527 --> 00:13:18,173
Mmm.
290
00:13:18,197 --> 00:13:20,112
Well, excuse me, both of you.
291
00:13:20,136 --> 00:13:22,785
I'm gonna go pick up
some film in the gift shop.
292
00:13:22,809 --> 00:13:25,758
Oh, well, thank
you. I have to go too.
293
00:13:25,782 --> 00:13:28,265
I, uh... I hear they're
having a sale on scalpels.
294
00:13:34,671 --> 00:13:35,737
( sighs )
295
00:13:40,115 --> 00:13:41,695
Hi, Jane. Where's Melanie?
296
00:13:41,719 --> 00:13:44,168
Oh, um, she went to
the gift shop with Doc.
297
00:13:44,192 --> 00:13:46,594
Oh. Thanks, Jane. See you later.
298
00:13:51,275 --> 00:13:52,876
( sighs )
299
00:13:56,385 --> 00:13:57,999
Hi, Jane. Hi.
300
00:13:58,023 --> 00:14:00,437
Where's Melanie?
301
00:14:00,461 --> 00:14:02,476
She's in the gift shop
with Doc and Mike.
302
00:14:02,500 --> 00:14:04,236
Thanks. See you around.
303
00:14:05,607 --> 00:14:08,489
( speaking in foreign language )
304
00:14:08,513 --> 00:14:10,316
She's in the gift shop.
305
00:14:17,065 --> 00:14:19,002
( upbeat theme playing )
306
00:14:20,709 --> 00:14:22,645
( band playing light jazz)
307
00:14:34,841 --> 00:14:36,408
( inaudible dialogue )
308
00:14:44,597 --> 00:14:46,408
You've had this lovely
young lady long enough.
309
00:14:46,432 --> 00:14:48,480
Time to share with a friend.
310
00:14:48,504 --> 00:14:51,322
Some things you don't
share, even with your friend.
311
00:14:51,346 --> 00:14:54,095
Very possessive, isn't
he? You think this is bad?
312
00:14:54,119 --> 00:14:56,280
You should see how
he is with his teddy bear.
313
00:15:07,917 --> 00:15:09,853
( music stops )
314
00:15:11,057 --> 00:15:13,607
I love watching them.
315
00:15:13,631 --> 00:15:15,375
They have such a
good time together.
316
00:15:15,399 --> 00:15:16,645
They're always touching.
317
00:15:16,669 --> 00:15:17,949
Who?
318
00:15:17,973 --> 00:15:19,821
Mr. Sherwood and his friend.
319
00:15:19,845 --> 00:15:21,781
( music resumes )
320
00:15:25,188 --> 00:15:27,236
That's not touching.
That's cradle snatching.
321
00:15:27,260 --> 00:15:30,311
Oh, you don't have a
poetic bone in your body.
322
00:15:30,335 --> 00:15:34,088
Well, Julie, he is a little old
for her, wouldn't you say?
323
00:15:34,112 --> 00:15:36,012
I think you're jealous.
324
00:15:37,551 --> 00:15:38,830
( sighs )
325
00:15:38,854 --> 00:15:40,501
Good evening.
326
00:15:40,525 --> 00:15:43,040
Good evening, sir.
Good evening, captain.
327
00:15:43,064 --> 00:15:46,314
Captain, you're a
man of the world.
328
00:15:46,338 --> 00:15:48,119
Why, thank you.
329
00:15:48,143 --> 00:15:49,688
Wouldn't you say
that man over there
330
00:15:49,712 --> 00:15:52,617
is just a little bit
too old for that lady?
331
00:15:53,355 --> 00:15:55,770
( both laugh )
332
00:15:55,794 --> 00:15:59,445
I don't know. He looks about
five years older than I do.
333
00:15:59,469 --> 00:16:00,803
Older? Tsk.
334
00:16:01,908 --> 00:16:02,886
Five years older?
335
00:16:02,910 --> 00:16:04,479
Gee, I would have guessed ten.
336
00:16:06,017 --> 00:16:09,188
Yes, I, uh... I can see
myself with a woman that age.
337
00:16:11,530 --> 00:16:13,065
They do look happy together.
338
00:16:15,003 --> 00:16:16,316
Well, if it works for them,
339
00:16:16,340 --> 00:16:18,609
that's what's
important, isn't it?
340
00:16:19,448 --> 00:16:22,063
After all, it is their affair.
341
00:16:22,087 --> 00:16:23,857
That's the word for it.
342
00:16:26,163 --> 00:16:28,510
Ah, now, here's your drink, sir.
343
00:16:28,534 --> 00:16:30,315
Thank you.
344
00:16:30,339 --> 00:16:33,323
Say, uh, how come you're
not out on the dance floor
345
00:16:33,347 --> 00:16:35,862
dancing with one of
those beautiful ladies?
346
00:16:35,886 --> 00:16:38,033
Your crew has them all.
347
00:16:38,057 --> 00:16:40,239
When do they find
time to do their work?
348
00:16:40,263 --> 00:16:42,812
Well, that is
part of their work.
349
00:16:42,836 --> 00:16:45,137
That's why they
never go on strike.
350
00:16:47,044 --> 00:16:48,678
On strike.
351
00:16:56,299 --> 00:16:58,213
May I cut in for
medical reasons?
352
00:16:58,237 --> 00:16:59,683
What medical reasons?
353
00:16:59,707 --> 00:17:01,510
I'm sick of you
dancing with her.
354
00:17:05,653 --> 00:17:07,021
( Melanie giggles )
355
00:17:11,634 --> 00:17:12,746
Hi, Jane.
356
00:17:12,770 --> 00:17:14,884
Hi, Gopher.
357
00:17:14,907 --> 00:17:16,922
Listen, um, when
Melanie gets back,
358
00:17:16,946 --> 00:17:18,692
would you please
tell that drink's for her?
359
00:17:18,716 --> 00:17:19,828
( sighs )
360
00:17:19,853 --> 00:17:21,166
Oh, of course.
361
00:17:21,190 --> 00:17:22,802
Thanks.
362
00:17:22,826 --> 00:17:24,340
Having a good time?
363
00:17:24,364 --> 00:17:25,441
Oh, yeah.
364
00:17:25,465 --> 00:17:27,079
Good.
365
00:17:27,103 --> 00:17:28,348
Bye.
366
00:17:28,372 --> 00:17:30,019
Bye.
367
00:17:30,043 --> 00:17:31,122
( sighs )
368
00:17:31,146 --> 00:17:32,758
I'm definitely
having a thrilling time
369
00:17:32,782 --> 00:17:37,057
watching Melanie dance
and watching Melanie's drink.
370
00:17:42,072 --> 00:17:43,083
May I cut in?
371
00:17:43,107 --> 00:17:45,041
Sure, try that
couple over there.
372
00:17:46,147 --> 00:17:47,348
Get lost, pal.
373
00:17:49,688 --> 00:17:51,157
Welcome home.
374
00:17:57,005 --> 00:18:00,088
( speaking in foreign language )
375
00:18:00,112 --> 00:18:02,816
I don't know. Can
you hum a few bars?
376
00:18:06,559 --> 00:18:08,773
Do you mind sharing this table?
377
00:18:08,797 --> 00:18:10,178
Oh, not at all.
378
00:18:10,202 --> 00:18:11,180
Who with?
379
00:18:11,204 --> 00:18:12,717
( laughing ): Me.
380
00:18:12,741 --> 00:18:15,590
( laughing ): Oh. Oh, excuse me.
381
00:18:15,614 --> 00:18:16,960
I'm such a ninny.
382
00:18:16,984 --> 00:18:18,830
( sighs )
383
00:18:18,854 --> 00:18:20,535
Beautiful day, wasn't it?
384
00:18:20,559 --> 00:18:22,373
Mm, yes.
385
00:18:22,397 --> 00:18:23,743
Did you take a swim?
386
00:18:23,767 --> 00:18:26,215
Well, I was going
to, but I didn't know
387
00:18:26,239 --> 00:18:28,202
how I'd get back
on the ship again.
388
00:18:29,613 --> 00:18:32,063
Uh, didn't anyone tell
you about the ship's pool?
389
00:18:32,087 --> 00:18:34,390
Oh, I never gamble.
390
00:18:37,063 --> 00:18:38,877
Very interesting.
391
00:18:38,901 --> 00:18:40,247
( chuckles )
392
00:18:40,271 --> 00:18:41,739
Gamble.
393
00:18:43,613 --> 00:18:46,060
Well, I know who
the inspector is.
394
00:18:46,084 --> 00:18:47,195
Who?
395
00:18:47,219 --> 00:18:49,001
( softly ): It's Mr. Waterman.
396
00:18:49,025 --> 00:18:50,193
( inaudible dialogue )
397
00:18:51,498 --> 00:18:53,879
He's been asking all
the passengers questions
398
00:18:53,903 --> 00:18:56,517
and taking notes.
399
00:18:56,541 --> 00:18:59,157
That's the guy that was checking
for dirt and walking around
400
00:18:59,181 --> 00:19:00,827
with a stopwatch.
401
00:19:00,851 --> 00:19:01,897
What'll we do?
402
00:19:01,921 --> 00:19:03,635
We don't do anything.
403
00:19:03,659 --> 00:19:06,829
We treat him exactly the
same as any other passenger.
404
00:19:10,574 --> 00:19:12,255
Hi, Mr. Waterman. How
are you this evening?
405
00:19:12,279 --> 00:19:14,227
Fine. Would you like to dance?
406
00:19:14,251 --> 00:19:15,761
Feeling all right,
sir? Mr. Waterman,
407
00:19:15,785 --> 00:19:17,264
I got some champagne here...
408
00:19:17,288 --> 00:19:18,935
Wait a minute, wait a
minute, wait a minute.
409
00:19:18,959 --> 00:19:21,643
Uh, would you care to
come up to see the bridge?
410
00:19:21,667 --> 00:19:23,134
Oh, excuse me.
411
00:19:25,408 --> 00:19:27,343
( upbeat theme playing )
412
00:19:32,991 --> 00:19:34,094
Mm.
413
00:19:42,147 --> 00:19:44,129
Why don't you come
in for a while, Mike.
414
00:19:44,153 --> 00:19:46,232
Well, I don't usually go to
a strange woman's cabin
415
00:19:46,256 --> 00:19:47,234
on the first date.
416
00:19:47,258 --> 00:19:49,573
Oh. But, uh, in your case,
417
00:19:49,597 --> 00:19:51,534
I'll make an exception.
418
00:19:57,982 --> 00:19:59,194
MELANIE: Oh, Janie,
419
00:19:59,218 --> 00:20:01,768
um, I didn't mean
to disturb you.
420
00:20:01,792 --> 00:20:03,293
See you later, okay?
421
00:20:04,465 --> 00:20:05,443
( sighs )
422
00:20:05,467 --> 00:20:07,079
Well, now what are we gonna do?
423
00:20:07,103 --> 00:20:08,315
How about your cabin? ( sighs )
424
00:20:08,339 --> 00:20:10,320
Same problem. Doug's in there.
425
00:20:10,344 --> 00:20:13,027
Well, I guess it's back
to the Acapulco Lounge.
426
00:20:13,051 --> 00:20:16,255
I wasn't exactly in the
mood for more dancing.
427
00:20:19,666 --> 00:20:21,380
Uh-huh.
428
00:20:21,404 --> 00:20:24,421
Oh, Doug, am I glad to see you.
429
00:20:24,445 --> 00:20:25,422
You are?
430
00:20:25,446 --> 00:20:27,159
Yeah, I have a big
favor to ask you.
431
00:20:27,183 --> 00:20:28,996
You want me to get
rid of this masher?
432
00:20:29,020 --> 00:20:30,567
Ha-ha. No, no.
433
00:20:30,591 --> 00:20:32,439
I want you to get
rid of my roommate.
434
00:20:32,463 --> 00:20:34,177
How about asking
her out for a drink?
435
00:20:34,201 --> 00:20:36,247
Yeah, for old time's sake.
What do you say, old buddy?
436
00:20:36,271 --> 00:20:37,616
Well, if I don't,
you guys are going
437
00:20:37,640 --> 00:20:38,952
to make a spectacle
of yourselves
438
00:20:38,976 --> 00:20:40,123
here in the passageway
439
00:20:40,147 --> 00:20:41,627
and embarrass
the hell out of me.
440
00:20:41,651 --> 00:20:43,414
Thanks, Doug. Thanks, old buddy.
441
00:20:44,523 --> 00:20:45,803
( knocks on door )
442
00:20:49,333 --> 00:20:50,512
Oh, hi, Jane.
443
00:20:50,536 --> 00:20:52,083
Uh, Melanie's out.
444
00:20:52,107 --> 00:20:54,055
I'm not looking for
Melanie. I'm looking for you.
445
00:20:54,079 --> 00:20:55,724
Would you like to
have a drink with me?
446
00:20:55,748 --> 00:20:58,987
So who'd you lose
out to, Doc or Mike?
447
00:21:00,360 --> 00:21:01,338
Mike.
448
00:21:01,362 --> 00:21:03,365
Figures. Let me get my purse.
449
00:21:05,538 --> 00:21:06,515
Let's go.
450
00:21:06,539 --> 00:21:08,475
( playful theme playing )
451
00:21:28,424 --> 00:21:29,669
There you go, Mr. Waterman.
452
00:21:29,693 --> 00:21:31,006
Can I get you
another pillow, sir?
453
00:21:31,030 --> 00:21:32,109
No.
454
00:21:32,133 --> 00:21:33,713
Can I get you something
to help you sleep?
455
00:21:33,737 --> 00:21:35,583
No, thank you. How
about a little nightcap?
456
00:21:35,607 --> 00:21:37,654
No. Listen, if you people
don't let me get some sleep,
457
00:21:37,678 --> 00:21:39,559
I'll never be able
to finish my book.
458
00:21:39,583 --> 00:21:41,397
Your book? Of course.
459
00:21:41,421 --> 00:21:44,638
I'm a writer. Why do you think
I've been making those notes?
460
00:21:44,662 --> 00:21:46,307
You're not an inspector?
461
00:21:46,331 --> 00:21:48,646
An inspector? I'm an author.
462
00:21:48,670 --> 00:21:50,116
You mean, you
haven't read my books?
463
00:21:50,140 --> 00:21:52,389
Heh. Well, they're
absolute classics.
464
00:21:52,413 --> 00:21:53,559
Take this one:
465
00:21:53,583 --> 00:21:55,495
uh, Marvin the Horse
Goes Skydiving.
466
00:21:55,519 --> 00:21:56,965
It's very, very popular.
467
00:21:56,989 --> 00:21:58,635
Marvin the Fish
Goes to Hollywood.
468
00:21:58,659 --> 00:21:59,805
Ooh.
469
00:21:59,829 --> 00:22:01,644
Marvin the Mosquito
Falls in Love.
470
00:22:01,668 --> 00:22:03,649
Oh, hey, I missed that one.
471
00:22:03,673 --> 00:22:06,219
When I was a kid,
for Pete's sake.
472
00:22:06,244 --> 00:22:08,725
Please leave me alone so I
can finish my latest and greatest:
473
00:22:08,749 --> 00:22:10,998
Marvin the Camel Takes a Cruise.
474
00:22:11,022 --> 00:22:12,335
And you're all in it.
475
00:22:12,359 --> 00:22:13,771
( all chuckle )
476
00:22:13,795 --> 00:22:16,443
We're sorry, Mr. Waterman.
We'll leave you alone.
477
00:22:16,467 --> 00:22:18,281
Have a good evening. Yes.
478
00:22:18,305 --> 00:22:19,806
Won't bother you again.
479
00:22:20,844 --> 00:22:22,157
( clears throat )
480
00:22:22,181 --> 00:22:23,360
Good night.
481
00:22:23,384 --> 00:22:26,354
( door closes, opens )
482
00:22:28,093 --> 00:22:29,071
( sighs )
483
00:22:29,095 --> 00:22:31,579
( playful theme playing )
484
00:22:31,603 --> 00:22:32,870
Do you mind?
485
00:22:34,108 --> 00:22:35,084
I love your work.
486
00:22:35,108 --> 00:22:36,377
( chuckles )
487
00:22:39,085 --> 00:22:42,036
Oh, terrific.
488
00:22:42,060 --> 00:22:43,908
They're in there
and I'm out here.
489
00:22:43,932 --> 00:22:45,977
Now where am I
supposed to sleep?
490
00:22:46,001 --> 00:22:48,283
I knew I shouldn't have
come on this trip with her.
491
00:22:48,307 --> 00:22:50,322
She always does this to me.
492
00:22:50,346 --> 00:22:51,825
You can sleep in my cabin.
493
00:22:51,849 --> 00:22:52,827
( scoffs )
494
00:22:52,851 --> 00:22:54,264
Doug, we just met.
495
00:22:54,289 --> 00:22:56,133
Oh, no, that... That's
not what I meant.
496
00:22:56,157 --> 00:22:57,660
I'm not asking you to, uh...
497
00:22:59,231 --> 00:23:00,445
Well, you know what I mean.
498
00:23:00,469 --> 00:23:02,282
No, I don't. What do you mean?
499
00:23:02,307 --> 00:23:04,187
Well, Mike's
inside with Melanie,
500
00:23:04,211 --> 00:23:06,858
so obviously there's an
empty bed in my cabin.
501
00:23:06,882 --> 00:23:09,064
You might as well
use it. It's convenient.
502
00:23:09,088 --> 00:23:10,702
Too convenient.
503
00:23:10,726 --> 00:23:14,712
I promise I'll sleep on my side
and you'll sleep on your side.
504
00:23:14,735 --> 00:23:17,371
There'll be no
hanky-panky. Scout's honor.
505
00:23:18,543 --> 00:23:20,022
Well,
506
00:23:20,046 --> 00:23:22,496
if you can't trust a
scout, who can you trust?
507
00:23:22,520 --> 00:23:23,499
Right.
508
00:23:23,523 --> 00:23:25,836
Just promise me one thing. What?
509
00:23:25,860 --> 00:23:28,074
Don't rub two sticks
together and start a fire.
510
00:23:28,098 --> 00:23:29,567
Heh-heh. Oh.
511
00:23:33,479 --> 00:23:35,413
( upbeat theme playing )
512
00:23:37,754 --> 00:23:40,035
You'll never get tired
of New York, will you?
513
00:23:40,059 --> 00:23:41,440
Never.
514
00:23:41,464 --> 00:23:43,342
It's one of a kind.
515
00:23:43,367 --> 00:23:46,650
The men always wear ties and
the ladies always wear dresses,
516
00:23:46,674 --> 00:23:49,056
and the city is always on
the verge of bankruptcy.
517
00:23:49,080 --> 00:23:50,694
( giggles )
518
00:23:50,718 --> 00:23:52,631
What about Beverly Hills?
519
00:23:52,655 --> 00:23:54,135
Oh, it never changes.
520
00:23:54,159 --> 00:23:58,110
We all sit there in our $60
jeans and watch the smog.
521
00:23:58,134 --> 00:23:59,948
Charming. ( laughs )
522
00:23:59,972 --> 00:24:02,521
Oh, you should see
my new penthouse.
523
00:24:02,545 --> 00:24:03,658
Knowing how you like flowers,
524
00:24:03,682 --> 00:24:06,629
I, uh, planted a
whole roof garden.
525
00:24:06,653 --> 00:24:09,571
How do you get anything to
grow in that New York soot?
526
00:24:09,595 --> 00:24:12,911
I figured out a way. I
planted black flowers.
527
00:24:12,935 --> 00:24:14,114
( laughs )
528
00:24:14,138 --> 00:24:16,452
When are you coming
back to L.A. again?
529
00:24:16,476 --> 00:24:19,125
Oh, in about, um,
a month, I hope.
530
00:24:19,149 --> 00:24:20,127
( coughs )
531
00:24:20,151 --> 00:24:21,130
Pardon.
532
00:24:21,154 --> 00:24:22,622
( coughing )
533
00:24:27,133 --> 00:24:28,581
They look better
on you than on Mike.
534
00:24:28,605 --> 00:24:30,719
Oh, yeah, perfect fit.
535
00:24:30,743 --> 00:24:31,855
Here, let me get that for you.
536
00:24:31,879 --> 00:24:33,157
Uh, no, thank you.
537
00:24:33,181 --> 00:24:35,496
I am perfectly capable of
rolling up my own pajama sleeve.
538
00:24:35,520 --> 00:24:36,898
Thank you.
539
00:24:36,922 --> 00:24:39,203
( playful theme playing )
540
00:24:39,227 --> 00:24:42,078
( clears throat ) Please
let me do that for you.
541
00:24:42,102 --> 00:24:45,105
I'm not trying to take them
off, I'm just trying to roll them up.
542
00:24:48,249 --> 00:24:49,851
There. Isn't that better?
543
00:24:53,463 --> 00:24:55,307
Well, would you like
something to eat?
544
00:24:55,331 --> 00:24:57,480
I can call room service.
545
00:24:57,504 --> 00:25:00,286
No. I'm not hungry.
546
00:25:00,310 --> 00:25:02,548
Well, then, would
you like a nightcap?
547
00:25:05,187 --> 00:25:06,399
Magazine?
548
00:25:06,423 --> 00:25:07,592
( sighs )
549
00:25:10,267 --> 00:25:12,214
Well, I guess there's
only one thing left to do.
550
00:25:12,238 --> 00:25:13,216
Let's go to bed.
551
00:25:13,240 --> 00:25:14,420
What?!
552
00:25:14,444 --> 00:25:16,022
To sleep.
553
00:25:16,046 --> 00:25:17,346
Oh.
554
00:25:18,418 --> 00:25:19,460
Of course.
555
00:25:26,871 --> 00:25:27,913
( sighs )
556
00:25:38,999 --> 00:25:40,500
( sighs )
557
00:25:43,945 --> 00:25:45,064
Good night, Jane.
558
00:26:04,592 --> 00:26:06,471
( clears throat )
559
00:26:06,495 --> 00:26:08,610
Mr. Waterman, I just
wanted to make sure
560
00:26:08,634 --> 00:26:10,877
you were getting
enough attention.
561
00:26:19,860 --> 00:26:21,796
( mellow theme playing )
562
00:26:24,970 --> 00:26:27,954
Did I tell you how handsome
you look this morning?
563
00:26:27,978 --> 00:26:29,056
No.
564
00:26:29,080 --> 00:26:30,160
Well, you do.
565
00:26:30,184 --> 00:26:31,698
Very handsome.
566
00:26:31,722 --> 00:26:32,866
Actually, you did.
567
00:26:32,890 --> 00:26:34,203
But I just wanted
to hear it again.
568
00:26:34,227 --> 00:26:35,303
Ha-ha-ha.
569
00:26:35,327 --> 00:26:37,010
( laughs ) Ha-ha-ha.
570
00:26:38,736 --> 00:26:40,951
Don't leave me.
571
00:26:40,975 --> 00:26:44,682
Darling, if it were
only up to me.
572
00:26:51,901 --> 00:26:53,179
Hi, sexy lady.
573
00:26:53,203 --> 00:26:54,515
Hello.
574
00:26:54,539 --> 00:26:55,516
Hi, Jane.
575
00:26:55,540 --> 00:26:56,519
Hi.
576
00:26:56,543 --> 00:26:58,490
Guess where she spent the night.
577
00:26:58,514 --> 00:27:00,562
MIKE: Doug? Ho-ho-ho.
578
00:27:00,586 --> 00:27:01,934
That son of a gun.
579
00:27:01,958 --> 00:27:04,139
All my training
hasn't been in vain.
580
00:27:04,163 --> 00:27:06,208
Was everything to
your satisfaction?
581
00:27:06,232 --> 00:27:07,511
Oh, yes.
582
00:27:07,535 --> 00:27:08,881
Uh, you have beautiful pajamas,
583
00:27:08,905 --> 00:27:11,889
but I think you should
have the sleeves shortened.
584
00:27:11,913 --> 00:27:14,094
I'll see the tailor after lunch.
585
00:27:14,118 --> 00:27:15,563
Come on, Melanie, I'm starving.
586
00:27:15,587 --> 00:27:16,633
We'll see you later, Jane.
587
00:27:16,657 --> 00:27:18,036
Bye, Jane. Have fun.
588
00:27:18,060 --> 00:27:19,708
Bye.
589
00:27:19,732 --> 00:27:21,975
Hey. Hello.
590
00:27:23,573 --> 00:27:24,752
Now I gotta admit,
591
00:27:24,776 --> 00:27:26,087
I like that outfit
a little better
592
00:27:26,111 --> 00:27:27,423
than the one you
had on last night.
593
00:27:27,447 --> 00:27:30,097
Of course, it
doesn't fit as well.
594
00:27:30,121 --> 00:27:31,769
( chuckles )
595
00:27:31,793 --> 00:27:35,074
By the way, where did
you go this morning?
596
00:27:35,098 --> 00:27:37,268
I wanted to thank
you for last night.
597
00:27:38,606 --> 00:27:40,087
You must be an early riser.
598
00:27:40,111 --> 00:27:41,759
Well, not really.
599
00:27:41,783 --> 00:27:44,230
I just figured you'd want
some privacy when you got up.
600
00:27:44,254 --> 00:27:46,133
You seemed a little
uncomfortable last night.
601
00:27:46,157 --> 00:27:48,371
Oh, uncomfortable? Me?
602
00:27:48,395 --> 00:27:50,644
Where did you get a
crazy idea like that?
603
00:27:50,668 --> 00:27:53,418
Oh, it's just a wild guess.
604
00:27:53,442 --> 00:27:55,353
I never saw anybody
sleep sitting up all night
605
00:27:55,377 --> 00:27:57,047
holding a sheet like this:
606
00:28:00,224 --> 00:28:01,537
How about some lunch?
607
00:28:01,561 --> 00:28:04,077
In your cabin or
the dining room?
608
00:28:04,101 --> 00:28:05,712
Let's try the dining room.
609
00:28:05,736 --> 00:28:07,979
I don't think you could
eat much through a sheet.
610
00:28:10,782 --> 00:28:12,796
How could we ever suspect a guy
611
00:28:12,820 --> 00:28:15,601
who wrote Marvin the
Worm Bakes a Pie?
612
00:28:15,625 --> 00:28:17,941
Well, it's gotta be somebody.
613
00:28:17,965 --> 00:28:20,079
Hey, you guys, guess who made
614
00:28:20,103 --> 00:28:22,284
three ship-to-shore
phone calls yesterday.
615
00:28:22,308 --> 00:28:24,256
Marvin the radio operator?
616
00:28:24,280 --> 00:28:25,892
( both laugh )
617
00:28:25,916 --> 00:28:28,732
No, Mrs. Corwin.
618
00:28:28,756 --> 00:28:30,136
No.
619
00:28:30,160 --> 00:28:32,341
We already eliminated her.
620
00:28:32,365 --> 00:28:35,212
Isaac, you make the
best coffee I ever tasted.
621
00:28:35,236 --> 00:28:36,883
Oh, thank you.
622
00:28:36,907 --> 00:28:38,720
The sweet rolls are delicious.
623
00:28:38,745 --> 00:28:39,991
Mm.
624
00:28:40,015 --> 00:28:42,351
I'm gonna mention
this in my next report.
625
00:28:44,793 --> 00:28:46,126
( clears throat )
626
00:28:46,864 --> 00:28:48,109
( elevator dings )
627
00:28:48,133 --> 00:28:49,546
( all chuckle )
628
00:28:49,570 --> 00:28:52,253
BRICKER: Now, wasn't
that a wonderful elevator ride?
629
00:28:52,277 --> 00:28:54,991
Uh, look, I'm just gonna
buy a couple of postcards.
630
00:28:55,015 --> 00:28:56,929
I mean, I really don't
need all this attention.
631
00:28:56,953 --> 00:28:58,467
Oh, well, that's
what we're here for.
632
00:28:58,491 --> 00:28:59,837
We'll help you pick 'em out.
633
00:28:59,861 --> 00:29:02,142
We're just treating you like
we do every other passenger.
634
00:29:02,166 --> 00:29:04,448
Oh, you've been
much too kind already.
635
00:29:04,472 --> 00:29:06,384
Oh, uh, by the way,
thanks for the copy
636
00:29:06,408 --> 00:29:07,955
of Marvin the Flea
Goes to Harvard.
637
00:29:07,979 --> 00:29:09,391
Oh.
638
00:29:09,415 --> 00:29:10,896
Now, let's see...
639
00:29:10,920 --> 00:29:13,034
I needed to buy two postcards.
640
00:29:13,058 --> 00:29:14,538
And there was one
more thing I needed
641
00:29:14,562 --> 00:29:16,975
before we get into Ensenada.
642
00:29:16,999 --> 00:29:21,085
( speaking in foreign language )
643
00:29:21,109 --> 00:29:25,027
That's it. A Spanish dictionary.
644
00:29:25,051 --> 00:29:26,894
I can get it for you!
645
00:29:29,160 --> 00:29:30,562
GOPHER: Hi. BOTH: Hi.
646
00:29:31,902 --> 00:29:34,483
I, uh, stopped by yesterday,
had it made up special.
647
00:29:34,507 --> 00:29:35,919
What is it?
648
00:29:35,943 --> 00:29:37,891
You'll see. Close your eyes.
649
00:29:37,915 --> 00:29:39,998
You didn't have to do that.
650
00:29:41,022 --> 00:29:44,028
I know, but I wanted to.
651
00:29:45,765 --> 00:29:46,978
Okay.
652
00:29:47,002 --> 00:29:48,983
I always wanted to
buy you a diamond.
653
00:29:49,007 --> 00:29:49,986
You're crazy.
654
00:29:50,010 --> 00:29:51,991
I was gonna have
it mounted in a ring.
655
00:29:52,015 --> 00:29:53,293
( laughs )
656
00:29:53,317 --> 00:29:56,021
Oh, the ace of diamonds
from my king of hearts.
657
00:29:58,061 --> 00:30:00,242
You know, I've been thinking.
658
00:30:00,266 --> 00:30:02,414
After the cruise I'd like to
go back to New York with you.
659
00:30:02,438 --> 00:30:05,185
Sarah, we've been
all through this.
660
00:30:05,209 --> 00:30:07,179
Please, I want to. No.
661
00:30:08,351 --> 00:30:12,358
Darling, we have an agreement.
662
00:30:16,736 --> 00:30:18,672
( upbeat theme playing )
663
00:30:21,281 --> 00:30:23,863
Isaac, another fog
cutter for Mrs. Corwin.
664
00:30:23,888 --> 00:30:25,098
Oh, no, captain.
665
00:30:25,122 --> 00:30:26,435
One more of those
666
00:30:26,459 --> 00:30:28,306
and I won't be able to
steer the ship straight.
667
00:30:28,330 --> 00:30:29,933
( all laugh )
668
00:30:31,471 --> 00:30:32,550
Oh, no, no.
669
00:30:32,574 --> 00:30:34,220
You're the one
who steers the ship,
670
00:30:34,244 --> 00:30:35,924
I'm the passenger.
671
00:30:35,948 --> 00:30:37,092
Oh, what the hey?
672
00:30:37,116 --> 00:30:39,331
Isaac, one more frog cutter.
673
00:30:39,355 --> 00:30:40,834
Uh, fog cutter.
674
00:30:40,858 --> 00:30:42,974
Not you, you're driving.
675
00:30:42,998 --> 00:30:44,466
( all laugh )
676
00:30:46,638 --> 00:30:48,574
( band playing light jazz )
677
00:30:51,383 --> 00:30:52,997
You know, it's sure nice of Doug
678
00:30:53,021 --> 00:30:55,200
to keep Jane occupied
this way, isn't it?
679
00:30:55,224 --> 00:30:57,907
Yeah, he's going way
beyond the call of duty.
680
00:30:57,932 --> 00:30:59,667
Heck of a good buddy.
681
00:31:05,515 --> 00:31:07,195
Fine cognac.
682
00:31:07,219 --> 00:31:10,058
A perfect ending
to a perfect meal.
683
00:31:11,597 --> 00:31:15,379
Do you remember the first time
you ever took me out for dinner?
684
00:31:15,403 --> 00:31:18,354
I mean, you know,
just the two of us alone?
685
00:31:18,378 --> 00:31:19,858
Of course.
686
00:31:19,882 --> 00:31:20,994
La Grenouille.
687
00:31:21,018 --> 00:31:22,264
Hm.
688
00:31:22,288 --> 00:31:25,036
In fact, I still remember
what you were wearing.
689
00:31:25,060 --> 00:31:26,272
No, you don't.
690
00:31:26,296 --> 00:31:27,876
Yes, I do.
691
00:31:27,900 --> 00:31:30,549
You... You had on
a pale blue dress,
692
00:31:30,573 --> 00:31:33,156
with, uh, lace
around the neckline
693
00:31:33,180 --> 00:31:35,259
and long sleeves.
694
00:31:35,283 --> 00:31:36,528
You're incredible.
695
00:31:36,552 --> 00:31:37,967
( chuckles )
696
00:31:37,991 --> 00:31:39,503
You know what I remember?
697
00:31:39,527 --> 00:31:40,706
What?
698
00:31:40,730 --> 00:31:43,346
I remember how impressed I was
699
00:31:43,370 --> 00:31:45,449
that the maitre d'
greeted you so personally
700
00:31:45,473 --> 00:31:46,987
and shook your hand.
701
00:31:47,011 --> 00:31:50,662
Oh, that's just because he
knew there was a $20 bill in it.
702
00:31:50,686 --> 00:31:54,472
And then when we
left, I remember thinking,
703
00:31:54,496 --> 00:31:57,600
"Gee, I hope I'm the only
girl he ever brings here."
704
00:31:59,807 --> 00:32:03,893
Then later, I remember you
carried me into the bedroom.
705
00:32:03,917 --> 00:32:06,564
( chuckles )
706
00:32:06,588 --> 00:32:11,610
Uh, I think that fellow at
the next table is listening.
707
00:32:11,634 --> 00:32:13,783
He just drank his candle.
708
00:32:13,807 --> 00:32:15,573
( both laugh )
709
00:32:17,080 --> 00:32:18,082
( kisses )
710
00:32:19,653 --> 00:32:21,221
( slurping )
711
00:32:23,194 --> 00:32:25,642
Another fog cutter, Mrs. Corwin?
712
00:32:25,666 --> 00:32:28,049
Oh, no, thank you.
713
00:32:28,073 --> 00:32:30,976
I'll be in no condition
to call in my report.
714
00:32:32,083 --> 00:32:33,527
Uh, I understand.
715
00:32:33,551 --> 00:32:35,452
Uh, business before pleasure.
716
00:32:36,157 --> 00:32:37,335
What business?
717
00:32:37,359 --> 00:32:39,541
My daughter paid for my trip.
718
00:32:39,565 --> 00:32:41,112
She makes me
call her twice a day
719
00:32:41,136 --> 00:32:43,059
to tell her
everything I'm doing.
720
00:32:45,211 --> 00:32:46,378
Your daughter?
721
00:32:47,650 --> 00:32:49,396
Or maybe it's my niece.
722
00:32:49,420 --> 00:32:51,055
They look so much alike.
723
00:32:54,234 --> 00:32:55,811
It's been lovely.
724
00:32:55,835 --> 00:32:57,281
Thank you.
725
00:32:57,305 --> 00:33:00,389
( speaking in foreign language )
726
00:33:00,413 --> 00:33:01,959
Why, certainly.
727
00:33:01,983 --> 00:33:03,853
I was just leaving.
728
00:33:11,172 --> 00:33:12,751
I really had fun today, Jane.
729
00:33:12,775 --> 00:33:14,311
Yeah, me too.
730
00:33:15,647 --> 00:33:17,094
Pick you up for breakfast?
731
00:33:17,118 --> 00:33:18,264
Eight o'clock okay?
732
00:33:18,288 --> 00:33:20,101
Okay.
733
00:33:20,125 --> 00:33:21,337
Well, good night.
734
00:33:21,361 --> 00:33:22,641
Good night.
735
00:33:22,665 --> 00:33:24,600
( romantic theme playing )
736
00:33:41,474 --> 00:33:43,488
( band playing light jazz )
737
00:33:43,512 --> 00:33:46,194
Well, looks like
your favorite couple's
738
00:33:46,218 --> 00:33:47,664
gonna close the joint.
739
00:33:47,688 --> 00:33:49,301
Yeah, aren't they terrific?
740
00:33:49,325 --> 00:33:51,874
They're never out
of each other's sight.
741
00:33:51,898 --> 00:33:54,680
ISAAC: You know, I've seen
a lot of couples come and go,
742
00:33:54,704 --> 00:33:57,017
but those two
have a relationship
743
00:33:57,041 --> 00:33:59,056
that's real special.
744
00:33:59,080 --> 00:34:00,148
Yeah.
745
00:34:05,527 --> 00:34:06,874
Well, good night, everybody.
746
00:34:06,898 --> 00:34:09,347
Well, good night, Isaac.
747
00:34:09,371 --> 00:34:10,349
Night, Doc.
748
00:34:10,373 --> 00:34:11,352
See you in the morning.
749
00:34:11,376 --> 00:34:12,744
Good night, Julie.
750
00:34:15,551 --> 00:34:17,231
Just one more, please.
751
00:34:17,255 --> 00:34:18,968
Do you know "You And I"?
752
00:34:18,992 --> 00:34:20,440
Would you play that, please?
753
00:34:20,464 --> 00:34:21,465
Thanks.
754
00:34:24,507 --> 00:34:26,442
( band playing "You and I" )
755
00:34:32,492 --> 00:34:35,641
♪ You and I ♪
756
00:34:35,665 --> 00:34:40,084
♪ Know the reason why ♪
757
00:34:40,108 --> 00:34:45,853
♪ A summer sky is blue ♪
758
00:34:47,057 --> 00:34:51,578
♪ And we know why ♪
759
00:34:51,602 --> 00:34:55,385
♪ Birds in the trees ♪
760
00:34:55,409 --> 00:35:01,702
♪ Sing melodies too ♪
761
00:35:01,726 --> 00:35:05,374
♪ And our love will grow ♪
762
00:35:05,398 --> 00:35:09,920
♪ From the first "hello" ♪
763
00:35:09,944 --> 00:35:15,431
♪ Until the last "goodbye" ♪
764
00:35:15,455 --> 00:35:16,701
( Sarah crying )
765
00:35:16,725 --> 00:35:17,927
Sarah!
766
00:35:18,931 --> 00:35:19,909
Sarah.
767
00:35:19,933 --> 00:35:21,737
( coughing )
768
00:35:23,275 --> 00:35:24,454
Are you all right?
769
00:35:24,478 --> 00:35:26,145
( coughing )
770
00:35:29,589 --> 00:35:31,123
( knocking on door )
771
00:35:34,967 --> 00:35:37,416
Tonight Mike invited
Melanie to my cabin.
772
00:35:37,440 --> 00:35:39,119
Ah, well, don't
just stand there.
773
00:35:39,143 --> 00:35:40,345
Come on in.
774
00:35:44,424 --> 00:35:46,169
Listen, if you're
uncomfortable about this,
775
00:35:46,193 --> 00:35:48,207
just tell me and I'll find
someplace else to go.
776
00:35:48,231 --> 00:35:51,214
Oh, no, no, no. I'm
not uncomfortable.
777
00:35:51,238 --> 00:35:52,719
I'm just worried
about one thing.
778
00:35:52,743 --> 00:35:54,055
What's that?
779
00:35:54,079 --> 00:35:56,213
How are you gonna look
in Melanie's pajamas?
780
00:35:57,854 --> 00:35:59,701
Uh, would you like
something to eat?
781
00:35:59,725 --> 00:36:00,970
I can call room service.
782
00:36:00,994 --> 00:36:02,273
No, thanks, I'm not hungry.
783
00:36:02,297 --> 00:36:03,678
Mm.
784
00:36:03,702 --> 00:36:04,742
How about a nightcap?
785
00:36:08,110 --> 00:36:10,359
Magazine?
786
00:36:10,383 --> 00:36:11,662
Oh, well,
787
00:36:11,686 --> 00:36:13,834
guess there's only one
thing left for us to do.
788
00:36:13,858 --> 00:36:15,469
Let's go to bed.
789
00:36:15,493 --> 00:36:17,429
( romantic theme playing )
790
00:36:34,871 --> 00:36:37,810
I'm sorry for that display.
791
00:36:39,783 --> 00:36:40,917
I know.
792
00:36:44,860 --> 00:36:46,496
Sarah...
793
00:36:48,737 --> 00:36:51,141
this isn't easy
for either of us.
794
00:36:53,850 --> 00:36:56,964
What am I gonna do without you?
795
00:36:56,988 --> 00:36:59,705
What am I gonna do?
796
00:36:59,729 --> 00:37:01,665
( crying )
797
00:37:12,292 --> 00:37:14,227
( upbeat theme playing )
798
00:37:16,300 --> 00:37:19,216
I'm gonna go and get
us some coffee, okay?
799
00:37:19,240 --> 00:37:21,276
I'll be right back.
You better be.
800
00:37:27,158 --> 00:37:28,638
Hey, buddy, I haven't
seen you around.
801
00:37:28,662 --> 00:37:29,807
Where you been?
802
00:37:29,831 --> 00:37:31,646
Well, Jane and I have
been keeping pretty busy.
803
00:37:31,670 --> 00:37:33,216
Yeah, I'll bet.
804
00:37:33,240 --> 00:37:34,585
Hey, I gotta tell
you, old buddy,
805
00:37:34,609 --> 00:37:37,023
you have really been a heck
of a good sport about this.
806
00:37:37,047 --> 00:37:38,327
And I won't forget it, either.
807
00:37:38,351 --> 00:37:39,328
What do you mean?
808
00:37:39,352 --> 00:37:40,900
You know, keeping
Jane out of our hair
809
00:37:40,924 --> 00:37:42,303
the way you've been doing.
810
00:37:42,327 --> 00:37:44,575
Asking her out for a drink
the other night was terrific.
811
00:37:44,599 --> 00:37:45,610
But keeping her busy
812
00:37:45,634 --> 00:37:47,413
so Mike and I could
be alone together,
813
00:37:47,437 --> 00:37:49,519
that's even better.
814
00:37:49,543 --> 00:37:51,423
Here's your coffee.
815
00:37:51,447 --> 00:37:53,384
( dramatic theme playing )
816
00:38:00,201 --> 00:38:01,715
DOUG: Jane!
817
00:38:01,739 --> 00:38:02,939
Goodbye.
818
00:38:06,983 --> 00:38:07,995
Oh, good morning.
819
00:38:08,019 --> 00:38:08,997
Morning.
820
00:38:09,021 --> 00:38:10,333
Where's Mr. Sherwood?
821
00:38:10,357 --> 00:38:12,607
This is the first time I've
ever seen you two apart.
822
00:38:12,631 --> 00:38:14,611
Well, uh, he had a
very restless night,
823
00:38:14,635 --> 00:38:16,882
so I'm letting him sleep late.
824
00:38:16,906 --> 00:38:18,520
I didn't want to wake him.
825
00:38:18,544 --> 00:38:20,859
Oh, I wish somebody'd
do that for me.
826
00:38:20,883 --> 00:38:22,685
Heh. Bye-bye. Bye-bye.
827
00:38:24,558 --> 00:38:27,238
How about...
828
00:38:27,262 --> 00:38:32,184
Marvin the Mole Meets
Starsky and Hutch?
829
00:38:32,208 --> 00:38:34,090
Uh, no, it won't work.
830
00:38:34,114 --> 00:38:36,950
Marvin the Mole
only works alone.
831
00:38:38,055 --> 00:38:41,539
( speaking in foreign language )
832
00:38:41,563 --> 00:38:43,109
Isn't that wonderful?
833
00:38:43,133 --> 00:38:46,471
They've translated your
books into every language.
834
00:38:49,113 --> 00:38:51,729
Well, we know the
inspector is not Mrs. Corwin
835
00:38:51,753 --> 00:38:52,899
or Mr. Waterman.
836
00:38:52,923 --> 00:38:54,335
That narrows it down.
837
00:38:54,359 --> 00:38:56,841
Yeah, uh, how many
passengers does that leave?
838
00:38:56,865 --> 00:38:59,234
Five hundred and ninety-eight.
839
00:39:00,205 --> 00:39:01,539
This is not going to be easy.
840
00:39:03,313 --> 00:39:06,028
Well, what are we gonna do?
841
00:39:06,052 --> 00:39:07,799
Well, we make
sure that everybody
842
00:39:07,823 --> 00:39:10,874
gets special treatment
before we hit L.A.
843
00:39:10,898 --> 00:39:12,611
Right.
844
00:39:12,635 --> 00:39:14,515
Well, let's get to it.
845
00:39:14,538 --> 00:39:16,373
( mellow theme playing )
846
00:39:20,052 --> 00:39:21,185
Jane?
847
00:39:22,223 --> 00:39:24,071
Jane?
848
00:39:24,095 --> 00:39:25,438
Open up.
849
00:39:25,462 --> 00:39:27,565
I'm going to stay
here until you do.
850
00:39:30,108 --> 00:39:32,456
I know hearing what
they said must've hurt,
851
00:39:32,480 --> 00:39:35,494
but what you don't know is
what I was going to say to them.
852
00:39:35,518 --> 00:39:37,521
That they did me a favor.
853
00:39:39,061 --> 00:39:41,243
( sighs )
854
00:39:41,267 --> 00:39:44,284
You're different from
any girl I've ever met.
855
00:39:44,308 --> 00:39:48,459
You're quiet and
sensitive and real.
856
00:39:48,483 --> 00:39:50,931
You don't have to worry
that you're not like Melanie.
857
00:39:50,955 --> 00:39:52,535
You're you.
858
00:39:52,559 --> 00:39:54,096
You're special.
859
00:39:56,201 --> 00:39:59,752
Well, anyway, I just
want you to know...
860
00:39:59,776 --> 00:40:01,623
I love you.
861
00:40:01,647 --> 00:40:04,119
Well, why didn't you
say so in the first place?
862
00:40:12,673 --> 00:40:15,889
Well, I'm glad to see
you two finally made up.
863
00:40:15,913 --> 00:40:18,729
Would you mind if
we use the cabin?
864
00:40:18,753 --> 00:40:20,554
Yes, we would.
865
00:40:31,716 --> 00:40:33,429
Let's go, sleepyhead, wake up.
866
00:40:33,453 --> 00:40:35,334
We've got a lot
of packing to do.
867
00:40:35,859 --> 00:40:37,259
Mrs. Lambert?
868
00:40:38,866 --> 00:40:40,278
Yes?
869
00:40:40,302 --> 00:40:44,055
May we have a word with
you in your cabin, please?
870
00:40:44,079 --> 00:40:46,224
What is it?
871
00:40:46,248 --> 00:40:47,583
Please.
872
00:40:48,989 --> 00:40:50,925
( dramatic theme playing )
873
00:40:59,713 --> 00:41:01,985
What is it? Tell me, please.
874
00:41:07,230 --> 00:41:09,278
Mr. Sherwood.
875
00:41:09,302 --> 00:41:14,757
A few hours ago...
He isn't... No, no.
876
00:41:14,781 --> 00:41:16,895
He's still alive.
877
00:41:16,919 --> 00:41:18,532
But he's in great pain.
878
00:41:18,556 --> 00:41:21,406
That's why I thought it best
that we take him to a hospital
879
00:41:21,430 --> 00:41:22,944
as quickly as possible.
880
00:41:22,968 --> 00:41:27,185
I had a launch take him to
Los Angeles about an hour ago.
881
00:41:27,209 --> 00:41:30,026
He asked me not to tell you.
882
00:41:30,050 --> 00:41:33,924
But, uh, he wanted
me to give you this.
883
00:41:35,963 --> 00:41:38,133
Oh, please, will...
Will you read it?
884
00:41:48,158 --> 00:41:52,711
"My dearest, darling Sarah,
885
00:41:52,735 --> 00:41:57,688
"the end is coming sooner
than the doctors foresaw,
886
00:41:57,712 --> 00:41:59,995
"and as we agreed,
887
00:42:00,019 --> 00:42:03,938
"I want to see this
thing through alone.
888
00:42:03,962 --> 00:42:06,576
"The short time I have left
889
00:42:06,600 --> 00:42:09,215
"would only be
torture for us both.
890
00:42:09,239 --> 00:42:14,794
"So I have left you
while joy was still with us,
891
00:42:14,818 --> 00:42:17,133
"as it has been from the moment
892
00:42:17,157 --> 00:42:19,627
"I first saw your
beautiful face.
893
00:42:23,740 --> 00:42:28,961
"Do not fret, my darling, Sarah.
894
00:42:28,985 --> 00:42:31,088
"Only my life is ending.
895
00:42:33,496 --> 00:42:39,909
"My undying love
for you will live on.
896
00:42:43,218 --> 00:42:48,294
"Your devoted... father."
897
00:42:50,402 --> 00:42:53,184
Um, where is he?
898
00:42:53,208 --> 00:42:54,774
What hospital?
899
00:43:00,691 --> 00:43:03,429
He asked me not to say.
900
00:43:04,268 --> 00:43:05,610
Uh, look.
901
00:43:05,634 --> 00:43:07,248
My father and I had a bargain
902
00:43:07,272 --> 00:43:09,687
that he... He wanted
to do this his way.
903
00:43:09,711 --> 00:43:13,097
But now I... Please,
tell me where he is.
904
00:43:13,121 --> 00:43:16,803
Dr. Bricker is in a
sensitive position.
905
00:43:16,827 --> 00:43:21,972
He has a doctor-patient
trust to uphold.
906
00:43:23,477 --> 00:43:24,488
Please.
907
00:43:24,512 --> 00:43:25,678
He needs me.
908
00:43:27,820 --> 00:43:30,057
Even if it's just
to hold his hand.
909
00:43:31,629 --> 00:43:33,310
And say "goodbye."
910
00:43:33,334 --> 00:43:34,667
Please.
911
00:43:39,113 --> 00:43:40,115
Adam?
912
00:43:42,054 --> 00:43:43,554
I'm not a doctor.
913
00:43:52,544 --> 00:43:55,414
He's at Cedars-Sinai
in Los Angeles.
914
00:43:57,221 --> 00:44:00,205
We'll be docking
in about an hour.
915
00:44:00,229 --> 00:44:01,863
I'll get you there.
916
00:44:07,777 --> 00:44:09,713
( funky theme playing )
917
00:44:11,787 --> 00:44:13,223
( sighs )
918
00:44:16,698 --> 00:44:18,178
( whistles )
919
00:44:18,202 --> 00:44:21,119
JULIE: That inspector
is driving us all crazy.
920
00:44:21,143 --> 00:44:22,278
( grunts )
921
00:44:25,318 --> 00:44:26,764
( sighs )
922
00:44:26,788 --> 00:44:29,171
I think I just broke
the world's record
923
00:44:29,195 --> 00:44:32,901
for consecutive Ping-Pong
games while playing shuffleboard.
924
00:44:33,873 --> 00:44:35,517
I'm exhausted.
925
00:44:35,541 --> 00:44:36,853
You?
926
00:44:36,877 --> 00:44:40,062
I'm gonna put a
sign over my bar.
927
00:44:40,086 --> 00:44:43,704
"Over One Million Served."
928
00:44:43,728 --> 00:44:44,894
( groans )
929
00:44:52,649 --> 00:44:53,917
( exhales )
930
00:44:55,286 --> 00:44:56,600
Hi.
931
00:44:56,624 --> 00:44:58,037
Can I help you?
932
00:44:58,061 --> 00:45:00,598
You're the only two I
haven't done anything for.
933
00:45:11,859 --> 00:45:13,840
Is that the way
you lounge around
934
00:45:13,864 --> 00:45:16,267
when there's an
inspector onboard?
935
00:45:20,413 --> 00:45:22,349
( upbeat theme playing )
936
00:45:33,676 --> 00:45:36,625
Marvin the Author Falls in Love.
937
00:45:36,649 --> 00:45:37,660
( chuckles )
938
00:45:37,684 --> 00:45:39,900
How about that,
Mrs. Corwin? Mmm?
939
00:45:39,924 --> 00:45:42,105
Wait'll my daughter
gets this report.
940
00:45:42,129 --> 00:45:43,831
( giggles )
941
00:45:44,468 --> 00:45:45,968
Oh, dear.
942
00:45:55,358 --> 00:45:56,738
It's been great, Melanie.
943
00:45:56,762 --> 00:45:58,442
You're a beautiful, sexy lady.
944
00:45:58,466 --> 00:46:00,903
And you're a
beautiful, sexy man.
945
00:46:05,114 --> 00:46:07,016
Well, we'll see you
sometime, okay?
946
00:46:08,289 --> 00:46:10,057
Uh... When?
947
00:46:11,530 --> 00:46:13,465
You know, sometime.
948
00:46:14,736 --> 00:46:15,737
Bye.
949
00:46:28,235 --> 00:46:29,646
I'll go get us all a cab, okay?
950
00:46:29,670 --> 00:46:31,273
Okay, don't be too long.
951
00:46:36,753 --> 00:46:39,269
Ah. Well, what can I
say? We're an item.
952
00:46:39,293 --> 00:46:42,544
Well, maybe you can ask
him to fix me up with a friend.
953
00:46:42,568 --> 00:46:43,869
Mm.
954
00:46:44,939 --> 00:46:46,118
ISAAC: Come back again.
955
00:46:46,142 --> 00:46:47,120
Bye.
956
00:46:47,144 --> 00:46:48,958
ALL: Bye!
957
00:46:48,982 --> 00:46:51,231
MELANIE: Bye. Bye.
958
00:46:51,255 --> 00:46:53,702
WOMAN: Bye.
959
00:46:53,726 --> 00:46:56,242
We've arranged for a car
to take you to the hospital.
960
00:46:56,266 --> 00:46:57,611
Thank you both for everything.
961
00:46:57,635 --> 00:46:59,582
I'm very sorry, Mrs. Lambert.
962
00:46:59,606 --> 00:47:00,819
Don't be.
963
00:47:00,843 --> 00:47:03,192
My father and I had as
near perfect a relationship
964
00:47:03,216 --> 00:47:04,882
as God will allow.
965
00:47:07,624 --> 00:47:08,626
Bye.
966
00:47:10,833 --> 00:47:12,313
( sighs )
967
00:47:12,337 --> 00:47:13,815
My God.
968
00:47:13,839 --> 00:47:16,687
He was her father and I thought
there was something going on.
969
00:47:16,711 --> 00:47:19,628
Why is it that we always
think the worst of people
970
00:47:19,652 --> 00:47:21,488
instead of the best?
971
00:47:29,006 --> 00:47:30,943
( upbeat theme playing )
972
00:47:38,963 --> 00:47:40,109
Mrs. Corwin was so nice...
973
00:47:40,133 --> 00:47:41,980
I must see someone
in charge immediately!
974
00:47:42,004 --> 00:47:44,586
Oh, well, sir, you're in
luck. Here's the captain.
975
00:47:44,610 --> 00:47:46,824
Oh, I am the company
inspector for the Princess Lines.
976
00:47:46,848 --> 00:47:48,928
You're the inspector? Mm-hm.
977
00:47:48,952 --> 00:47:51,502
STUBING: I don't remember
seeing you on this cruise.
978
00:47:51,526 --> 00:47:53,273
Well, that's what I
was trying to say.
979
00:47:53,297 --> 00:47:55,276
My father drove me to
the dock and disappeared.
980
00:47:55,300 --> 00:47:57,381
And while I was rushing
around, trying to find him,
981
00:47:57,405 --> 00:47:58,885
the ship sailed without me.
982
00:47:58,909 --> 00:48:00,990
You had seven days... (
speaking in foreign language)
983
00:48:01,014 --> 00:48:03,229
Papa!
984
00:48:03,254 --> 00:48:04,865
( laughing )
985
00:48:04,889 --> 00:48:06,536
JULIE: Excuse me, excuse me.
986
00:48:06,560 --> 00:48:08,507
That phrase that
your father just used.
987
00:48:08,531 --> 00:48:11,013
( speaks in foreign language )
988
00:48:11,037 --> 00:48:12,684
What does that mean?
989
00:48:12,708 --> 00:48:14,720
Uh, it means, uh...
990
00:48:14,744 --> 00:48:17,716
"Have you seen my
son, the inspector?"
991
00:48:19,055 --> 00:48:20,958
ALL: Oh!
992
00:48:33,356 --> 00:48:35,357
( Jack Jones' "The
Love Boat" playing )
67594
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