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1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:08,100
[DOORBELL RINGING]
2
00:00:08,133 --> 00:00:10,153
[SHUSHING]
3
00:00:10,183 --> 00:00:14,123
Who the heck is that
at 5:00 in the morning?
4
00:00:14,150 --> 00:00:16,220
They'll wake up
the whole house.
5
00:00:16,250 --> 00:00:18,280
[YELLS] Niles!
6
00:00:21,483 --> 00:00:23,373
Oh, good. You heard me.
7
00:00:23,400 --> 00:00:25,300
Van Gogh heard you.
8
00:00:26,383 --> 00:00:29,333
He's dead and missing an ear.
9
00:00:30,433 --> 00:00:32,173
Well, that's attractive.
10
00:00:32,200 --> 00:00:35,470
Oh, it's a bite plate.
I grind my teeth.
11
00:00:36,000 --> 00:00:38,180
You know, my cousin Eileen
12
00:00:38,216 --> 00:00:41,826
ground her teeth
down to the gums.
13
00:00:41,116 --> 00:00:43,496
She doesn't smile much
anymore,
14
00:00:43,830 --> 00:00:46,400
but my cousin Bob has
never been happier.
15
00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:53,160
What?
You sleep in your makeup?
16
00:00:53,500 --> 00:00:56,220
Honey, do you see
a ring on this finger?
17
00:00:57,166 --> 00:00:58,346
What if there was a fire?
18
00:00:58,383 --> 00:01:01,203
Do I need some gorgeous
fireman climbing over me
19
00:01:01,233 --> 00:01:04,153
to save the 16-year-old
heiress?
20
00:01:07,433 --> 00:01:11,333
Ma, what are you
doing here so early?
21
00:01:11,660 --> 00:01:13,270
This is how you sleep?
22
00:01:13,300 --> 00:01:15,130
Where are your earrings?
23
00:01:17,250 --> 00:01:18,470
Good girl.
24
00:01:19,000 --> 00:01:21,100
Oh, hello, Niles.
Good morning.
25
00:01:21,133 --> 00:01:25,433
Do I smell banana fritters
with fresh fruit compote?
26
00:01:25,466 --> 00:01:27,126
No.
27
00:01:28,150 --> 00:01:29,250
Could I?
28
00:01:33,500 --> 00:01:34,270
So, as long as I'm here,
29
00:01:34,300 --> 00:01:36,270
how did the date
with the doctor go?
30
00:01:36,300 --> 00:01:38,330
The date was canceled.
31
00:01:38,660 --> 00:01:39,430
Oh, well, you're gonna
have to get used to that
32
00:01:39,466 --> 00:01:42,276
when you're the
surgeon's wife.
33
00:01:42,316 --> 00:01:44,416
He's a tree surgeon, Ma.
34
00:01:44,450 --> 00:01:48,380
Meanwhile, you can still
make reservations under
"Dr. and Mrs."
35
00:01:48,416 --> 00:01:51,996
Ma, listen, I canceled
the date.
36
00:01:54,400 --> 00:01:56,300
Darling, you think
I'm gonna hit you?
37
00:01:56,333 --> 00:01:57,473
Well...
38
00:01:58,000 --> 00:02:00,120
You decided not to see
a doctor?
39
00:02:00,150 --> 00:02:01,380
What are you, sick?
40
00:02:01,416 --> 00:02:03,416
The kids needed me.
41
00:02:03,450 --> 00:02:06,380
Fran, you're obsessed
with these people.
42
00:02:06,416 --> 00:02:09,176
When are you gonna get
a life of your own?
43
00:02:09,216 --> 00:02:11,416
You know, Ma, I wanted
to surprise you,
44
00:02:11,450 --> 00:02:14,400
but I did meet someone.
45
00:02:14,433 --> 00:02:18,003
He's a very successful
investment banker
46
00:02:18,330 --> 00:02:19,300
worth zillions.
47
00:02:19,333 --> 00:02:21,163
[BOTH EXCLAIMING]
48
00:02:21,500 --> 00:02:25,130
The only thing is I had
to sign a prenup.
49
00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:32,120
You see, Ma? I could kill you
if I want.
50
00:02:34,660 --> 00:02:36,120
Now, lay off.
51
00:02:36,150 --> 00:02:38,100
Fine. Live alone,
52
00:02:38,133 --> 00:02:41,453
have no one to talk to
across the dining table,
53
00:02:41,483 --> 00:02:43,373
no one to make love with.
54
00:02:43,400 --> 00:02:47,480
Believe me, darling,
I know what that's like.
55
00:02:48,160 --> 00:02:50,660
Ma, you have Daddy.
56
00:02:50,100 --> 00:02:51,450
Where am I losing you?
57
00:02:57,216 --> 00:03:00,196
SINGER:♪♪ She was workingin a bridal shopin Flushing, Queens ♪♪
58
00:03:00,233 --> 00:03:01,433
♪♪ 'Til her boyfriendkicked her out ♪♪
59
00:03:01,466 --> 00:03:03,396
♪♪ In one of thosecrushing scenes ♪♪
60
00:03:03,433 --> 00:03:05,253
♪♪ What was she to do?Where was she to go? ♪♪
61
00:03:05,283 --> 00:03:08,183
♪♪ She was out on her fanny ♪♪
62
00:03:08,216 --> 00:03:11,656
♪♪ So over the bridgefrom Flushingto the Sheffields' door ♪♪
63
00:03:11,100 --> 00:03:13,280
♪♪ She was thereto sell makeup,but the father saw more ♪♪
64
00:03:13,316 --> 00:03:15,476
♪♪ She had style!She had flair!She was there! ♪♪
65
00:03:16,160 --> 00:03:19,230
♪♪ That's howshe became the nanny! ♪♪
66
00:03:19,266 --> 00:03:22,276
♪♪ Who would have guessedthat the girlwe've described ♪♪
67
00:03:22,316 --> 00:03:24,446
♪♪ Was just exactly whatthe doctor prescribed? ♪♪
68
00:03:24,483 --> 00:03:26,203
♪♪ Now the fatherfinds her beguiling ♪♪
69
00:03:26,233 --> 00:03:27,433
♪♪ Watch out, C.C.! ♪♪
70
00:03:27,466 --> 00:03:29,156
♪♪ And the kidsare actually smiling ♪♪
71
00:03:29,500 --> 00:03:31,660
♪♪ Such joie de vivre! ♪♪
72
00:03:31,100 --> 00:03:35,370
♪♪ She's the lady in redwhen everybody elseis wearing tan ♪♪
73
00:03:35,400 --> 00:03:38,000
♪♪ The flashy girlfrom Flushing ♪♪
74
00:03:38,330 --> 00:03:40,220
♪♪ The nanny named Fran! ♪♪
75
00:03:42,116 --> 00:03:45,326
Glen, we couldn't possibly
open
our new show without you.
76
00:03:45,366 --> 00:03:48,166
Look what you did for
Sunset Boulevard.
77
00:03:48,200 --> 00:03:50,000
Sure, I'll hold.
78
00:03:50,330 --> 00:03:51,330
You missed a spot.
79
00:03:51,660 --> 00:03:52,300
Where?
80
00:03:52,333 --> 00:03:53,423
There.
81
00:03:58,133 --> 00:04:01,153
Oh, nothing. Just playing
with
the domestic's head.
82
00:04:01,183 --> 00:04:04,133
Uh-huh.
83
00:04:11,233 --> 00:04:14,303
Maxwell, your coffee's ready.
84
00:04:18,316 --> 00:04:20,156
I'm never gonna
pass this test.
85
00:04:20,500 --> 00:04:22,120
I might as well just go
to a locksmith college.
86
00:04:22,150 --> 00:04:25,120
B, you're gonna
do great, honey.
87
00:04:25,150 --> 00:04:28,330
Just go out there and
bring me home an A.
88
00:04:28,366 --> 00:04:31,656
Fran, you're supposed to
tell him to do his best
89
00:04:31,100 --> 00:04:33,000
or you'll make him
feel undue pressure
90
00:04:33,330 --> 00:04:35,420
and he'll develop
performance anxiety.
91
00:04:37,383 --> 00:04:40,303
I have a history of that
with men. B!
92
00:04:42,160 --> 00:04:44,000
B, you know what?
Pass or fail,
93
00:04:44,330 --> 00:04:46,000
what difference does it
make, really?
94
00:04:46,330 --> 00:04:50,500
The important thing is, in four
years, you get your trust fund.
95
00:04:50,830 --> 00:04:52,320
-Have a good day at school.
-Thank you, Fran, bye.
96
00:04:52,350 --> 00:04:56,000
Oh, peace at last.
97
00:04:56,330 --> 00:04:58,300
Finally I can do something
for myself.
98
00:04:58,333 --> 00:05:02,203
Niles, would you pour me a cup
of coffee and give me the
paper?
99
00:05:02,233 --> 00:05:04,123
Miss Fine, it's
right there.
100
00:05:04,150 --> 00:05:06,370
[GROANING]
101
00:05:09,160 --> 00:05:11,180
Thank you.
102
00:05:11,216 --> 00:05:16,826
Oh, why do they show pictures
with wedding announcements?
103
00:05:16,116 --> 00:05:19,166
Who cares what someone looks
like if they're not available?
104
00:05:19,200 --> 00:05:21,160
Divorce announcements,
105
00:05:21,500 --> 00:05:23,280
that's where I want
to see a picture.
106
00:05:23,316 --> 00:05:25,496
-[BELL BUZZING]
-Thank you.
107
00:05:27,350 --> 00:05:28,330
Thanks.
108
00:05:28,366 --> 00:05:30,166
Oh, Fran, I'm desperate.
109
00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:31,450
Well, join the club.
110
00:05:31,483 --> 00:05:34,663
We meet once a year
at the Coliseum.
111
00:05:34,100 --> 00:05:36,370
Here I am, I'm
33 years old...
112
00:05:36,400 --> 00:05:37,480
[COUGHING]
113
00:05:40,830 --> 00:05:41,420
How old did you say?
114
00:05:41,450 --> 00:05:43,450
I thought you two were in
the same class.
115
00:05:43,483 --> 00:05:47,103
Well, I skipped a few grades.
I was very brilliant.
116
00:05:48,433 --> 00:05:50,403
She got left back.
117
00:05:52,283 --> 00:05:53,433
[SIGHING]
118
00:05:53,466 --> 00:05:56,196
I can't stand living
at home anymore.
119
00:05:56,233 --> 00:05:58,353
My parents treat me
like a child.
120
00:05:58,383 --> 00:06:02,173
Well, you can't afford
rent on your allowance.
121
00:06:02,200 --> 00:06:04,230
Maybe if I got a roommate...
122
00:06:04,266 --> 00:06:06,326
Yeah, well, that's
a good idea.
123
00:06:06,660 --> 00:06:08,220
Oh, no, no, no.
124
00:06:08,250 --> 00:06:10,000
Come on, Fran.
125
00:06:10,330 --> 00:06:11,150
I found this great place
126
00:06:11,183 --> 00:06:13,333
just crawling with
single guys.
127
00:06:13,366 --> 00:06:15,096
You could still work here
during the day
128
00:06:15,133 --> 00:06:17,323
and, you know, maybe
have a life.
129
00:06:17,350 --> 00:06:19,180
Have you been talking
to my mother?
130
00:06:19,216 --> 00:06:23,496
Please. It's bad enough I have
to talk to my mother.
131
00:06:23,830 --> 00:06:26,000
Now you think I spend my spare
time talking to yours?
132
00:06:27,283 --> 00:06:29,253
Well, maybe you're right.
133
00:06:29,283 --> 00:06:34,303
I'm never going to meet
a rich, eligible bachelor
around this place.
134
00:06:34,333 --> 00:06:35,283
Hello.
135
00:06:35,316 --> 00:06:37,166
-Hi.
-Hi.
136
00:06:40,830 --> 00:06:42,100
Oh, what am I
talking about?
137
00:06:42,133 --> 00:06:43,423
I have a life.
138
00:06:43,450 --> 00:06:45,470
I got a date with
a podiatrist.
139
00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:47,370
A foot doctor?
Mmm-hmm.
140
00:06:47,400 --> 00:06:50,330
You better go do your toes.
141
00:06:50,660 --> 00:06:53,370
Oh. Unless, of course, you
don't
have personal time.
142
00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:56,400
Oh, Val, this is only
my first date.
143
00:06:56,433 --> 00:06:59,333
What am I, a tramp?
144
00:06:59,660 --> 00:07:03,320
These little piggies don't
have
to go to his market so fast.
145
00:07:05,266 --> 00:07:07,376
Is that a bunion poking
through your shoe,
146
00:07:07,416 --> 00:07:10,426
or are you just
happy to see me?
147
00:07:13,330 --> 00:07:15,280
Maybe I shouldn't
open with that.
148
00:07:15,316 --> 00:07:16,376
Hey, Fran.
149
00:07:16,416 --> 00:07:18,156
Brighton, Brighton!
150
00:07:18,500 --> 00:07:20,660
You're not five years old
anymore.
151
00:07:20,100 --> 00:07:21,150
Why don't you knock?
152
00:07:21,183 --> 00:07:24,223
Because I'm not five years old
anymore.
153
00:07:26,150 --> 00:07:29,270
At least Niles pretends
to vacuum.
154
00:07:30,466 --> 00:07:32,476
So we've got a date tonight?
Yes, we do.
155
00:07:33,160 --> 00:07:35,230
Where's he taking you?
What's he do for a living?
156
00:07:35,266 --> 00:07:37,446
Ma! Go out of here.
157
00:07:37,483 --> 00:07:40,153
You have more privacy
on a kibbutz.
158
00:07:40,183 --> 00:07:41,303
Fran, when are you
going to help me
159
00:07:41,333 --> 00:07:43,153
with my dinosaur project?
160
00:07:43,183 --> 00:07:46,323
Oh, honey, honey, I promise,
I promise I'll do it
tomorrow.
161
00:07:46,350 --> 00:07:50,130
[WHINING]
162
00:07:50,166 --> 00:07:53,196
Gracie, that whining
is so annoying.
163
00:07:53,233 --> 00:07:56,833
Where did you
pick that up?
164
00:08:00,366 --> 00:08:03,446
MAGGIE: Fran, help! My hair's
caught in my blow dryer!
165
00:08:03,483 --> 00:08:07,003
Oh, I should have
stopped after one.
166
00:08:09,416 --> 00:08:12,996
[VACUUM CLEANER WHIRRING]
167
00:08:17,350 --> 00:08:20,160
She's not here.
168
00:08:24,400 --> 00:08:26,450
[GIGGLING]
169
00:08:28,830 --> 00:08:33,000
I've never played footsie
with a pro before.
170
00:08:48,116 --> 00:08:50,376
Relax. It's not like we're
two kids out on the porch
171
00:08:50,416 --> 00:08:52,316
and your dad's flicking
the lights.
172
00:08:52,350 --> 00:08:53,420
Yeah.
173
00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:59,350
Fran, you're 24 years old.
174
00:08:59,383 --> 00:09:01,333
Well...
175
00:09:01,660 --> 00:09:03,120
Not till July.
176
00:09:04,416 --> 00:09:06,166
He shouldn't be
doing this to you.
177
00:09:06,200 --> 00:09:07,330
I know.
178
00:09:07,366 --> 00:09:09,326
Daddy!
179
00:09:10,450 --> 00:09:13,830
Maybe I should go.
I'll call you.
180
00:09:13,116 --> 00:09:15,176
Oh, bye. Thank you.
181
00:09:21,266 --> 00:09:23,376
Oh, good. You're back.
182
00:09:23,416 --> 00:09:26,416
Brighton insists
you tuck him in.
183
00:09:26,450 --> 00:09:28,180
We'll discuss that later.
184
00:09:28,216 --> 00:09:30,126
Margaret is sobbing
in front of a mirror,
185
00:09:30,166 --> 00:09:31,476
"My bangs! My bangs!"
186
00:09:32,160 --> 00:09:35,270
And I have a dinosaur
perma-glued to my hand.
187
00:09:39,416 --> 00:09:41,146
What?
188
00:09:41,183 --> 00:09:42,323
What?
189
00:09:42,350 --> 00:09:44,250
Didn't you see what just
happened?
190
00:09:44,283 --> 00:09:46,503
I was in the middle
of a date,
191
00:09:46,830 --> 00:09:47,300
and you interrupted me.
192
00:09:47,333 --> 00:09:50,103
Well... calm down, Miss Fine.
193
00:09:50,133 --> 00:09:51,423
It happens so infrequently.
194
00:09:51,450 --> 00:09:53,320
No.
195
00:09:53,350 --> 00:09:57,830
You are always cutting
into my personal time.
196
00:09:57,116 --> 00:09:59,826
No, I meant you having
a date.
197
00:10:00,416 --> 00:10:04,496
Meanwhile, I'm not the one
sitting home on a Saturday
night
198
00:10:04,830 --> 00:10:07,300
with his hand glued
to his brontosaurus.
199
00:10:08,483 --> 00:10:11,163
Just tell me how to
get it off.
200
00:10:11,500 --> 00:10:12,450
Try blowing in his ear.
201
00:10:18,660 --> 00:10:20,170
All right. There's
a special trick.
202
00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:23,000
Put your other hand
over your mouth.
203
00:10:23,330 --> 00:10:25,830
[MUFFLED SCREAMING]
204
00:10:29,266 --> 00:10:31,496
You know, I'm telling you,
Mr. Sheffield,
205
00:10:31,830 --> 00:10:32,420
between you
and the kids,
206
00:10:32,450 --> 00:10:34,450
I don't have a life
of my own.
207
00:10:34,483 --> 00:10:39,663
Maybe I should've told Val
I'd move into that apartment
with her.
208
00:10:39,100 --> 00:10:43,000
Come on, Miss Fine, you live
upstairs and you're late for
work.
209
00:10:47,150 --> 00:10:50,500
Well, excuse me, but I like
to
look presentable.
210
00:10:50,830 --> 00:10:52,170
I'm not the type to
come down to breakfast
211
00:10:52,200 --> 00:10:53,280
looking like a schlub
212
00:10:53,316 --> 00:10:56,326
in a big bathrobe and
fuzzy slipper...
213
00:10:56,466 --> 00:10:59,246
Look, the point is...
214
00:10:59,283 --> 00:11:02,163
we're getting off
the subject, here.
215
00:11:02,500 --> 00:11:05,170
The thing is, you don't have
to
get so defensive with me
216
00:11:05,200 --> 00:11:09,830
just because I said that
I might need some space.
217
00:11:09,116 --> 00:11:11,146
I know you'd miss me.
218
00:11:11,183 --> 00:11:15,163
Yes, well, let's see, what
would I miss most...
219
00:11:15,500 --> 00:11:19,160
sitting on your Daisy Razor
every time I step into
the Jacuzzi tub,
220
00:11:19,500 --> 00:11:21,480
or having to readjust my
treadmill every morning
221
00:11:22,160 --> 00:11:23,350
after you've set it
to schlep?
222
00:11:26,333 --> 00:11:30,403
You know, you're no prize to
live with either, mister.
223
00:11:30,433 --> 00:11:32,123
I got a newsflash
for you.
224
00:11:32,150 --> 00:11:33,470
That accent of yours?
225
00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:36,830
Very annoying.
226
00:11:38,383 --> 00:11:40,133
And why, every time
you leave the room,
227
00:11:40,166 --> 00:11:42,366
do you have to
mention cereals?
228
00:11:42,400 --> 00:11:44,330
What the bloody hell are you
talking about now?
229
00:11:44,366 --> 00:11:47,196
Cheerios! Cheerios!
230
00:11:48,283 --> 00:11:50,833
Well, I'll have you know
you have some
231
00:11:50,116 --> 00:11:52,476
pretty annoying little habits
of your own.
232
00:11:57,383 --> 00:12:00,433
Well, I'm waiting. Give me
your best shot.
233
00:12:00,466 --> 00:12:03,156
All right. Fine.
Get your own place.
234
00:12:03,500 --> 00:12:04,300
You'll come crawling back.
235
00:12:04,333 --> 00:12:06,103
Only after you beg me,
236
00:12:06,133 --> 00:12:08,473
'cause you won't even
last a week without me.
237
00:12:09,000 --> 00:12:12,280
What, you think I'm incapable of
putting three children to sleep?
238
00:12:12,316 --> 00:12:14,656
No. Not at all.
Just plop them
239
00:12:14,100 --> 00:12:16,000
in the front row
of your new show.
240
00:12:16,330 --> 00:12:18,330
All right. That's it.
Out. Go on, get out.
241
00:12:18,660 --> 00:12:20,420
I--I want to be seeing you
from the rear.
242
00:12:20,450 --> 00:12:24,300
Oh, it's too late for
flattery now, mister.
243
00:12:33,216 --> 00:12:36,176
[BOTH] Schlemiel! Schlimazel!
244
00:12:36,216 --> 00:12:37,996
[BOTH MUMBLING]
245
00:12:38,330 --> 00:12:40,000
..incorporated!
..incorporated!
246
00:12:42,316 --> 00:12:44,466
Oh, my God. Val...
247
00:12:45,416 --> 00:12:47,466
This is it?
248
00:12:48,160 --> 00:12:50,230
Well, I said it was
a little small.
249
00:12:50,266 --> 00:12:51,416
"A little small"?
250
00:12:51,450 --> 00:12:54,280
Thing had more
room than this.
251
00:12:54,316 --> 00:12:57,496
Well, at least it's a roof
over our heads
252
00:12:57,830 --> 00:12:59,130
to keep us dry
from the rain.
253
00:12:59,166 --> 00:13:01,296
It's not raining, Val.
254
00:13:01,333 --> 00:13:04,473
Hey, lady!
Curb your dog!
255
00:13:05,000 --> 00:13:08,160
Oh, my God! A roach!
A roach!
256
00:13:08,500 --> 00:13:10,400
Well, take your shoe off
and kill it.
257
00:13:16,160 --> 00:13:17,830
Oh, my God.
258
00:13:17,116 --> 00:13:19,426
I moved in with Forrest Gump.
259
00:13:21,266 --> 00:13:24,096
Val, I can't believe
you leased this place.
260
00:13:24,133 --> 00:13:26,103
Boy, I'd like to see
the moron
261
00:13:26,133 --> 00:13:28,233
that talked you
into this dump.
262
00:13:28,266 --> 00:13:29,396
Hello.
263
00:13:34,450 --> 00:13:39,500
Welcome, ladies, to
my humble commode.
264
00:13:39,830 --> 00:13:41,100
You got that right.
265
00:13:41,133 --> 00:13:43,233
So, let me guess.
You're the landlord?
266
00:13:43,266 --> 00:13:46,156
Oh, no. You flatter me.
267
00:13:46,500 --> 00:13:48,230
I share the landlording
responsibilities
268
00:13:48,266 --> 00:13:51,396
with my significant
other other, Leonard.
269
00:13:51,433 --> 00:13:56,333
Why, we've been together
now for, oh, 17 years.
270
00:13:56,660 --> 00:13:58,380
17 years and still
no children.
271
00:13:58,416 --> 00:14:00,196
[TUTTING]
272
00:14:00,233 --> 00:14:02,333
But we keep trying.
273
00:14:04,330 --> 00:14:07,660
The place is just crawling
with single men, Val?
274
00:14:07,100 --> 00:14:09,420
Perhaps somebody should have
thought twice
275
00:14:09,450 --> 00:14:11,350
before renting
an apartment
276
00:14:11,383 --> 00:14:16,663
across the street from
the Judy Holliday Inn.
277
00:14:16,100 --> 00:14:17,660
[COUGHING]
278
00:14:17,100 --> 00:14:18,150
Excuse me, ladies.
279
00:14:18,183 --> 00:14:20,223
I must bid you a doo-doo
280
00:14:20,250 --> 00:14:24,420
because tonight is our
17th anniversary
281
00:14:24,450 --> 00:14:29,350
and Leonard is very busy
preparing a beef bourguenine.
282
00:14:32,100 --> 00:14:35,160
17 is meat.
283
00:14:40,366 --> 00:14:42,296
All right. Calm down.
284
00:14:42,333 --> 00:14:44,273
There's got to be at least
a couple guys here
285
00:14:44,300 --> 00:14:47,250
who'll be interested in us.
286
00:14:47,283 --> 00:14:50,373
SINGER:♪♪ Clang, clang,clang went the trolley ♪♪
287
00:14:50,400 --> 00:14:54,220
♪♪ Ding, ding,ding went the bell ♪♪
288
00:15:07,450 --> 00:15:11,000
[JACKHAMMER DRILLING]
289
00:15:15,116 --> 00:15:16,216
Oh, my God.
290
00:15:16,250 --> 00:15:18,220
Val! Val! I overslept.
291
00:15:18,250 --> 00:15:20,250
I'm gonna be late for work.
292
00:15:20,283 --> 00:15:23,233
What are we doing up
at the crack of dawn?
293
00:15:23,266 --> 00:15:26,416
I don't think it's dawn's
crack
we're looking at.
294
00:15:30,500 --> 00:15:32,420
Well, there you go.
It's 8:03.
295
00:15:32,450 --> 00:15:34,130
She's late.
296
00:15:34,166 --> 00:15:38,426
The tramp, she probably woke up
in some gigolo's apartment.
297
00:15:38,466 --> 00:15:42,146
What luck. She can probably
return your toiletries.
298
00:15:44,100 --> 00:15:48,420
Oh, I just love being
an independent woman.
299
00:15:48,450 --> 00:15:50,170
Niles, thanks for
the casserole.
300
00:15:50,200 --> 00:15:53,430
The whites are in the wash.
The darks are in the sink.
301
00:15:53,466 --> 00:15:55,146
MAXWELL: So, who's
the bigger nut,
302
00:15:55,183 --> 00:15:57,153
the woman who takes two buses
and a subway
303
00:15:57,183 --> 00:15:59,223
in her bathrobe and fuzzy
slippers,
304
00:15:59,250 --> 00:16:02,380
or the man who pays her
to raise his children?
305
00:16:02,416 --> 00:16:06,316
Nanny Fine, it must be great
to have your own place
306
00:16:06,350 --> 00:16:09,450
and not be just a brunette
Kato Kaelin.
307
00:16:12,116 --> 00:16:15,346
Like he's a natural blond.
308
00:16:15,383 --> 00:16:18,153
Of all people not to
know that.
309
00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:21,450
Oh, Fran, I'm so jealous.
310
00:16:21,483 --> 00:16:23,483
So, are there any cute guys
in your new building?
311
00:16:24,160 --> 00:16:28,130
Oh, are you kidding? They're
coming out of the closet.
312
00:16:32,416 --> 00:16:34,146
So, uh, tell me,
313
00:16:34,183 --> 00:16:35,483
how was your first night
without me?
314
00:16:36,160 --> 00:16:37,150
Well, actually, Miss Fine,
315
00:16:37,183 --> 00:16:39,383
the evening went off
without a hitch.
316
00:16:39,416 --> 00:16:40,996
Yes, we did our homework,
317
00:16:41,330 --> 00:16:42,480
we tidied our rooms,
318
00:16:43,160 --> 00:16:44,320
we roughhoused.
319
00:16:44,350 --> 00:16:47,420
And then Mr. Sheffield
came home from the club.
320
00:16:47,450 --> 00:16:51,000
Niles, maybe you should
close the window
321
00:16:51,330 --> 00:16:53,430
before your Christmas
bonus flies out.
322
00:16:53,466 --> 00:16:58,326
I'm going to be late.
Dad, I need that 50 bucks for
those books in school today.
323
00:16:58,660 --> 00:17:00,270
Well, right.
Yes, here you go, Son.
324
00:17:00,300 --> 00:17:03,200
Have a good day at school.
Bye.
325
00:17:03,233 --> 00:17:06,503
Uh, Dad, I need some
lunch money.
326
00:17:06,830 --> 00:17:08,000
Oh, right. There you are,
sweetheart.
327
00:17:08,330 --> 00:17:09,230
Thanks.
328
00:17:09,266 --> 00:17:12,656
So, you see, Miss Fine?
329
00:17:12,100 --> 00:17:15,100
I can manage perfectly well
without you.
330
00:17:15,133 --> 00:17:16,303
Uh-huh.
331
00:17:16,333 --> 00:17:18,283
You do know it's Saturday?
332
00:17:20,400 --> 00:17:23,350
SINGER:
♪♪ Celebrate good times ♪♪
333
00:17:23,383 --> 00:17:25,273
♪♪ Come on ♪♪
334
00:17:29,283 --> 00:17:32,333
Oh, live and let live.
335
00:17:32,660 --> 00:17:33,280
Isn't this great?
336
00:17:33,316 --> 00:17:35,996
It's Saturday night, and we're
living in a building
337
00:17:36,330 --> 00:17:37,370
filled with guys.
338
00:17:37,400 --> 00:17:40,830
All gay.
339
00:17:41,330 --> 00:17:43,280
I could change them.
340
00:17:46,433 --> 00:17:50,163
Val, did I forget to thank
you
for picking a building
341
00:17:50,500 --> 00:17:53,330
walking distance from
Grandma Yetta's home?
342
00:17:53,660 --> 00:17:56,430
SINGER:♪♪ There's a partygoing on right here ♪♪
343
00:17:56,466 --> 00:17:59,826
♪♪ A celebration ♪♪
344
00:18:06,333 --> 00:18:09,183
Uh, may we please be excused?
345
00:18:09,216 --> 00:18:11,176
No.
346
00:18:11,216 --> 00:18:13,176
This is family time.
347
00:18:13,216 --> 00:18:17,216
We should talk about...
family things.
348
00:18:26,216 --> 00:18:27,396
Okay.
349
00:18:27,433 --> 00:18:29,503
When you go,
350
00:18:29,830 --> 00:18:30,320
have you already
decided who gets what,
351
00:18:30,350 --> 00:18:33,320
or can we go around and put
little stickers on stuff?
352
00:18:33,350 --> 00:18:35,220
All right. You may be excused.
353
00:18:35,250 --> 00:18:36,430
Thank you.
354
00:18:41,660 --> 00:18:43,450
Niles, old man, pull up a
chair
and have a cup of coffee.
355
00:18:43,483 --> 00:18:45,333
Oh, thank you, sir.
356
00:18:52,660 --> 00:18:53,350
There you go.
357
00:18:56,183 --> 00:18:58,283
May I have some cream, sir?
358
00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:01,330
Yeah, of course, old man.
359
00:19:04,266 --> 00:19:05,296
Say when.
360
00:19:05,333 --> 00:19:06,423
When.
361
00:19:10,100 --> 00:19:11,350
I'll take a little sugar.
362
00:19:19,116 --> 00:19:20,316
Oh, two lumps.
363
00:19:24,266 --> 00:19:27,266
And I've got such a yen for
those Pepperidge Farms Mint
Milano...
364
00:19:27,300 --> 00:19:29,270
Don't push it, Niles.
365
00:19:29,300 --> 00:19:30,380
Yes, sir.
366
00:19:35,166 --> 00:19:36,246
You know, Niles,
367
00:19:36,283 --> 00:19:38,333
it really is
rather peaceful
368
00:19:38,366 --> 00:19:42,176
without having Miss Fine
flapping about.
369
00:19:42,216 --> 00:19:45,146
You see, this is what a real
nanny is supposed to do.
370
00:19:45,183 --> 00:19:48,453
Take care of the children,
then go home.
371
00:19:48,483 --> 00:19:51,163
How do you propose
we get her back?
372
00:19:51,500 --> 00:19:53,000
I don't know. Any ideas?
373
00:19:59,383 --> 00:20:01,403
Well,
374
00:20:01,433 --> 00:20:03,163
I'm on my way home.
375
00:20:03,500 --> 00:20:04,180
Unless, of course,
there's something
376
00:20:04,216 --> 00:20:07,156
you need me for that
you can't admit to.
377
00:20:07,466 --> 00:20:09,416
No.
378
00:20:09,450 --> 00:20:13,220
Unless there's some reason
you want to stay that you
can't fess up to.
379
00:20:13,250 --> 00:20:15,150
Huh! Fat chance.
380
00:20:15,183 --> 00:20:16,483
[DOORBELL RINGING]
381
00:20:17,160 --> 00:20:18,660
Oh.
382
00:20:20,400 --> 00:20:22,660
Ma, what are you doing here?
383
00:20:22,100 --> 00:20:24,470
I came to talk to him.
384
00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:26,380
I beg your pardon?
385
00:20:26,416 --> 00:20:28,826
How can you sleep at night
386
00:20:28,116 --> 00:20:30,316
knowing my daughter
is living in that dump,
387
00:20:30,350 --> 00:20:33,470
traveling back and forth
at all hours of the night?
388
00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:36,230
Ma, you can't talk to
my boss like that.
389
00:20:36,266 --> 00:20:38,366
And you. Pack your bags.
You're moving back in.
390
00:20:38,400 --> 00:20:41,180
No! I'm a grown woman.
I'm not afraid of you.
391
00:20:41,216 --> 00:20:43,496
[EXCLAIMING]
392
00:20:43,830 --> 00:20:44,320
I'm sorry, Mommy.
393
00:20:44,350 --> 00:20:47,170
Sylvia, it appears your
daughter
has made her decision.
394
00:20:47,200 --> 00:20:49,170
And it's simply
not your place...
395
00:20:51,433 --> 00:20:54,153
I'll send the limo
for her things.
396
00:20:54,183 --> 00:20:57,323
Ma, this is the most
embarrassing thing you
have ever...
397
00:20:57,350 --> 00:21:01,330
oh, good, he's gone.
Ma, you were fabulous!
398
00:21:04,216 --> 00:21:06,296
I owe you.
399
00:21:06,333 --> 00:21:09,473
All I ask in return
is a cup of coffee,
400
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:11,430
a few Snackwells
401
00:21:11,466 --> 00:21:13,466
and maybe a grandchild.
402
00:21:15,330 --> 00:21:16,380
Well, let's start with
the cup of coffee.
403
00:21:16,416 --> 00:21:18,226
That I can make by myself.
404
00:21:22,216 --> 00:21:25,096
Sylvia, you were sublime.
405
00:21:28,416 --> 00:21:30,826
Here, as promised,
406
00:21:30,116 --> 00:21:32,276
two tickets toShow Boat
for you and Morty.
407
00:21:32,316 --> 00:21:34,826
Oh.
408
00:21:34,116 --> 00:21:37,196
I guess we'll eat
at home first.
409
00:21:40,116 --> 00:21:42,826
And dinner for two
at Sardi's.
410
00:21:42,116 --> 00:21:44,346
Oh, if you insist.
411
00:21:49,466 --> 00:21:53,166
So, I--I take it you're
moving back in.
412
00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:56,250
Well, you know,
for Ma's sake.
413
00:21:56,283 --> 00:22:00,133
Well, she only has your
interests at heart.
414
00:22:03,500 --> 00:22:04,470
How much did it cost you?
415
00:22:08,150 --> 00:22:10,500
Show Boat
You?
416
00:22:11,330 --> 00:22:12,150
Grandchildren.
417
00:22:15,660 --> 00:22:19,000
Uh, look, um, I intended this
as
an apartment-warming present,
418
00:22:19,330 --> 00:22:20,400
but, uh, well...
419
00:22:20,433 --> 00:22:21,473
Welcome home.
420
00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:24,200
Oh, Mr. Sheffield,
421
00:22:24,233 --> 00:22:28,273
that is so sweet.
422
00:22:28,300 --> 00:22:31,330
Judy Garland.
423
00:22:32,266 --> 00:22:35,196
[MUSIC PLAYING]
424
00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:45,420
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
29165
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