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1
00:00:03,241 --> 00:00:05,678
( Jack Jones' "The
Love Boat" playing )
2
00:00:12,263 --> 00:00:14,132
♪ Love ♪
3
00:00:15,939 --> 00:00:18,977
♪ Exciting and new ♪
4
00:00:19,949 --> 00:00:21,885
♪ Come aboard ♪
5
00:00:23,859 --> 00:00:27,745
♪ We're expecting you ♪
6
00:00:27,769 --> 00:00:30,305
♪ And love ♪
7
00:00:31,945 --> 00:00:35,931
♪ Life's sweetest reward ♪
8
00:00:35,955 --> 00:00:37,958
♪ Let it flow ♪
9
00:00:39,965 --> 00:00:44,085
♪ It floats back to you ♪
10
00:00:44,109 --> 00:00:47,595
♪ The Love Boat ♪
11
00:00:47,619 --> 00:00:52,572
♪ Soon will be
making Another run ♪
12
00:00:52,597 --> 00:00:55,848
♪ The Love Boat ♪
13
00:00:55,872 --> 00:01:00,359
♪ Promises something
For everyone ♪
14
00:01:00,383 --> 00:01:02,564
♪ Set a course for adventure ♪
15
00:01:02,588 --> 00:01:06,830
♪ Your mind on a new romance ♪
16
00:01:08,670 --> 00:01:12,122
♪ And love ♪
17
00:01:12,146 --> 00:01:15,252
♪ Won't hurt anymore ♪
18
00:01:16,356 --> 00:01:20,309
♪ It's an open smile ♪
19
00:01:20,333 --> 00:01:24,653
♪ On a friendly shore ♪
20
00:01:24,677 --> 00:01:29,132
♪ It's love ♪
21
00:01:29,156 --> 00:01:33,630
♪ Welcome aboard It's love ♪
22
00:01:39,314 --> 00:01:41,250
( upbeat theme playing )
23
00:02:06,648 --> 00:02:08,629
Are...? Are you sure it's safe?
24
00:02:08,653 --> 00:02:10,334
I've never been
on a ship before.
25
00:02:10,358 --> 00:02:11,404
Of course it's safe.
26
00:02:11,428 --> 00:02:12,672
Well, nothing will happen to us?
27
00:02:12,696 --> 00:02:15,480
Denise, this is a
pleasure cruise.
28
00:02:15,504 --> 00:02:18,487
They're not gonna dump
us on a beach at Anzio.
29
00:02:18,511 --> 00:02:20,659
Come on, just relax.
30
00:02:20,683 --> 00:02:21,763
"Relax."
31
00:02:21,787 --> 00:02:23,868
Oh, that's easy for you to say.
32
00:02:23,892 --> 00:02:26,506
You haven't been president of
the PTA for the past two years.
33
00:02:26,530 --> 00:02:28,278
Parents screaming,
teachers screaming.
34
00:02:28,302 --> 00:02:29,515
All of them screaming at me.
35
00:02:29,539 --> 00:02:31,888
I know. That's why
I thought that, uh...
36
00:02:31,912 --> 00:02:33,291
And you're not a den mother.
37
00:02:33,315 --> 00:02:36,432
You didn't take 29 Brownies
to Disneyland last Sunday.
38
00:02:36,456 --> 00:02:39,673
Do you know how scary
it is to go to Disneyland
39
00:02:39,697 --> 00:02:42,647
with 29 little girls and
come home with 30?
40
00:02:42,671 --> 00:02:45,310
Denise, anyone
can make a mistake.
41
00:02:47,852 --> 00:02:49,030
Oh, the car pool.
42
00:02:49,054 --> 00:02:50,768
I-I'm supposed to do
the car pool next week...
43
00:02:50,792 --> 00:02:51,771
Denise. It's my turn.
44
00:02:51,795 --> 00:02:53,241
Don't you remember?
45
00:02:53,265 --> 00:02:55,413
You switched weeks with Betty?
46
00:02:55,437 --> 00:02:57,819
Oh. That's right. I forgot.
47
00:02:57,843 --> 00:03:01,661
Oh, my nerves are tight
as a drum from all this.
48
00:03:01,685 --> 00:03:02,730
Exactly.
49
00:03:02,754 --> 00:03:04,669
And that's why you
need a vacation.
50
00:03:04,693 --> 00:03:06,674
You never arranged
for a vacation
51
00:03:06,698 --> 00:03:08,546
since we've been
married. Why a cruise?
52
00:03:08,570 --> 00:03:12,455
'Cause that's the
kind of rest you need.
53
00:03:12,479 --> 00:03:14,951
( romantic theme playing )
54
00:03:27,383 --> 00:03:31,871
Roxy, you can't
run out like this!
55
00:03:31,895 --> 00:03:35,280
Gus, I am tired.
56
00:03:35,304 --> 00:03:39,010
If you do this to Bob
Hope, you'll be dead in TV.
57
00:03:41,586 --> 00:03:44,702
Roxy? Rox... Roxy.
58
00:03:44,726 --> 00:03:46,696
Roxy, will you listen to reason?
59
00:03:48,068 --> 00:03:51,186
Did I just die and go to
heaven, or is that Roxy Blue?
60
00:03:51,210 --> 00:03:52,451
Where?
61
00:03:54,551 --> 00:03:57,435
You died and went to
heaven. There's nobody there.
62
00:03:57,459 --> 00:03:58,704
She just came on board.
63
00:03:58,728 --> 00:04:01,043
I'm telling you, I know
Roxy Blue when I see her.
64
00:04:01,067 --> 00:04:02,915
He knows her when
he hears her too.
65
00:04:02,939 --> 00:04:05,521
He's played her Satin
Doll album so many times,
66
00:04:05,545 --> 00:04:07,793
she sounds like George C. Scott.
67
00:04:07,817 --> 00:04:10,000
Well, she's not on my list.
68
00:04:10,024 --> 00:04:12,305
Well, maybe she's traveling
under another name.
69
00:04:12,329 --> 00:04:16,115
Hey, Isaac, maybe we
can fix you up with her, man.
70
00:04:16,139 --> 00:04:18,542
Come on, man. Me and Roxy Blue?
71
00:04:20,049 --> 00:04:22,932
Well, at least get her to
sign your Satin Doll album.
72
00:04:22,956 --> 00:04:24,368
Yeah, and if she won't do that,
73
00:04:24,392 --> 00:04:27,476
maybe we can get
George C. Scott to sign it.
74
00:04:27,500 --> 00:04:29,437
( upbeat theme playing )
75
00:04:36,389 --> 00:04:38,337
Hi, Julie. Hi.
76
00:04:38,361 --> 00:04:39,740
We're Brett and
Denise Fredericks.
77
00:04:39,764 --> 00:04:43,183
Well, welcome aboard.
Fredericks, Fredericks.
78
00:04:43,207 --> 00:04:44,852
Yes, there you are.
79
00:04:44,876 --> 00:04:47,360
You're in cabin 104 on
the Promenade Deck.
80
00:04:47,384 --> 00:04:50,467
Go up the stairs, through
those doors and forward.
81
00:04:50,491 --> 00:04:52,204
Right. Thanks a lot.
82
00:04:52,228 --> 00:04:53,497
Mm-hm.
83
00:04:55,170 --> 00:04:57,083
You acted as if you knew her.
84
00:04:57,107 --> 00:04:58,219
I don't know her.
85
00:04:58,243 --> 00:04:59,256
I didn't say you knew her.
86
00:04:59,280 --> 00:05:01,261
I just said you acted
as if you knew her.
87
00:05:01,285 --> 00:05:02,964
I mean, you said, "Hi, Julie."
88
00:05:02,988 --> 00:05:04,602
Well, that's her name.
89
00:05:04,626 --> 00:05:05,738
Well, my name's Denise,
90
00:05:05,762 --> 00:05:07,576
but she didn't
say, "Hi, Denise."
91
00:05:07,600 --> 00:05:09,581
You're not wearing a
nametag that says Denise.
92
00:05:09,605 --> 00:05:11,586
She's wearing a
nametag that says Julie.
93
00:05:11,610 --> 00:05:12,878
( mouths ): Oh.
94
00:05:14,417 --> 00:05:16,220
I'll be back in a minute.
95
00:05:21,502 --> 00:05:23,172
Have a good time.
96
00:05:24,342 --> 00:05:25,754
Excuse me, Julie.
97
00:05:25,778 --> 00:05:28,161
Uh, I just wanna remind
you, I'm the one that called
98
00:05:28,185 --> 00:05:30,100
about the surprise
birthday party for my wife.
99
00:05:30,124 --> 00:05:31,603
( quietly ): Oh, yeah, I know.
100
00:05:31,627 --> 00:05:33,708
Uh, why don't you call me
later, and we'll make plans.
101
00:05:33,732 --> 00:05:35,580
You're a doll.
102
00:05:35,604 --> 00:05:38,120
( humming )
103
00:05:38,144 --> 00:05:40,058
I thought you didn't know her.
104
00:05:40,082 --> 00:05:41,060
I don't know her.
105
00:05:41,084 --> 00:05:42,764
Then how come
you were whispering
106
00:05:42,788 --> 00:05:44,101
to a perfect stranger?
107
00:05:44,125 --> 00:05:46,640
I told her of your concern
for the safety of the ship,
108
00:05:46,664 --> 00:05:48,879
and asked her to
tell the ship's captain
109
00:05:48,903 --> 00:05:50,250
to please drive carefully.
110
00:05:50,274 --> 00:05:54,260
Oh, heh, thank you.
111
00:05:54,284 --> 00:05:55,385
You're welcome.
112
00:05:56,522 --> 00:05:58,225
Did she say she would?
113
00:05:59,864 --> 00:06:01,411
Yes, sir, Mr. Fourgis.
114
00:06:01,435 --> 00:06:03,516
That's table 29,
the late sitting, sir.
115
00:06:03,540 --> 00:06:05,019
Thank you.
116
00:06:05,043 --> 00:06:06,890
Ah, welcome aboard, sir.
117
00:06:06,914 --> 00:06:08,261
Mr., uh...?
118
00:06:08,285 --> 00:06:11,436
Tanner. Capital T-A-N-N-E-R.
119
00:06:11,460 --> 00:06:13,173
But I guess you know that.
120
00:06:13,198 --> 00:06:14,477
Yes.
121
00:06:14,501 --> 00:06:17,015
I mean, I guess that's
the only way to spell it.
122
00:06:17,039 --> 00:06:19,021
There's not another
way to spell it, is there?
123
00:06:19,045 --> 00:06:21,160
Not in English, that I know of.
124
00:06:21,184 --> 00:06:23,599
Yeah, just T-A-N-N-E-R.
125
00:06:23,623 --> 00:06:25,705
Heh, heh, heh. Right.
126
00:06:25,729 --> 00:06:27,843
Capital T. I forgot to say that.
127
00:06:27,867 --> 00:06:29,381
Well, I got it.
128
00:06:29,405 --> 00:06:32,221
Uh, okay, uh, Mr. Tanner.
129
00:06:32,245 --> 00:06:35,430
That's, uh, table
14. Capital one-four.
130
00:06:35,454 --> 00:06:37,968
Heh. Ah, late sitting.
131
00:06:37,992 --> 00:06:40,575
Thank you. I do know
for a fact, though,
132
00:06:40,599 --> 00:06:42,547
there's only way to
spell my first name.
133
00:06:42,571 --> 00:06:43,583
Robert.
134
00:06:43,607 --> 00:06:45,654
If he spells it out,
I'm gonna scream.
135
00:06:45,678 --> 00:06:48,661
R-O-B-E-R-T.
136
00:06:48,685 --> 00:06:51,536
Of course, back home on the
farm they used to call me Bob,
137
00:06:51,560 --> 00:06:53,541
or Bobby, or Little
Bob, or Little Bobby.
138
00:06:53,565 --> 00:06:55,780
That's on account of my
Daddy's name was Robert too,
139
00:06:55,804 --> 00:06:57,251
and we'd get all
mixed up in the family
140
00:06:57,275 --> 00:06:59,389
if they called us
both Bob or Bobby.
141
00:06:59,413 --> 00:07:02,095
Well, those are the
breaks on the farm, I guess.
142
00:07:02,119 --> 00:07:04,133
Of course, I guess they
could have called him Big Bob
143
00:07:04,158 --> 00:07:07,208
or Big Bobby, but he was
so short, nobody never did.
144
00:07:07,233 --> 00:07:08,812
( chuckles )
145
00:07:08,836 --> 00:07:10,650
C'est la vie.
146
00:07:10,674 --> 00:07:13,122
There could be one problem
though, here on the boat.
147
00:07:13,146 --> 00:07:15,229
Yeah, I think I know
what that could be, yeah.
148
00:07:15,253 --> 00:07:17,065
What if there's
another Robert Tanner?
149
00:07:17,089 --> 00:07:20,007
Couldn't be. Uh,
next, please. Please.
150
00:07:20,031 --> 00:07:23,716
( light-hearted theme playing )
151
00:07:23,740 --> 00:07:24,819
Dullard!
152
00:07:24,843 --> 00:07:27,146
Ah, Mr. and Mrs.
Dullard. Welcome aboard.
153
00:07:29,119 --> 00:07:30,733
( crowd cheering )
154
00:07:30,757 --> 00:07:31,736
WOMAN: Goodbye.
155
00:07:31,760 --> 00:07:34,698
( upbeat theme playing )
156
00:07:43,723 --> 00:07:44,724
Look!
157
00:07:46,195 --> 00:07:48,131
( ship's horn blows )
158
00:07:50,640 --> 00:07:52,855
STUBING ( over PA ): Good
evening, ladies and gentlemen.
159
00:07:52,879 --> 00:07:54,392
This is Captain Stubing.
160
00:07:54,416 --> 00:07:56,397
Midnight buffet is
now being served
161
00:07:56,421 --> 00:07:58,156
in the Coral Dining Room.
162
00:07:59,330 --> 00:08:01,944
Uh, Kahlua on the rocks, please.
163
00:08:01,968 --> 00:08:03,068
Yes, ma'am.
164
00:08:03,973 --> 00:08:07,223
Yes, ma'am, Miss Blue!
165
00:08:07,249 --> 00:08:09,598
Sweetheart, will you
please do me a favor?
166
00:08:09,622 --> 00:08:11,936
Just put your eyeballs
back in your head
167
00:08:11,960 --> 00:08:14,141
and serve me my
Kahlua very quietly.
168
00:08:14,165 --> 00:08:15,979
I'd really appreciate that.
169
00:08:16,003 --> 00:08:17,785
Right.
170
00:08:17,809 --> 00:08:18,787
Okay. Right.
171
00:08:18,811 --> 00:08:19,856
Fine.
172
00:08:19,880 --> 00:08:21,560
Solid. Fine.
173
00:08:21,584 --> 00:08:24,000
You got it.
174
00:08:24,024 --> 00:08:25,671
What was it that you wanted?
175
00:08:25,695 --> 00:08:27,509
Kahlua.
176
00:08:27,533 --> 00:08:30,404
Right. Ha-ha.
177
00:08:33,112 --> 00:08:34,360
You got me kind of flustered.
178
00:08:34,384 --> 00:08:37,065
I... I mean, I can't
believe I'm standing here
179
00:08:37,089 --> 00:08:39,271
talkin' to Roxy... Shh.
180
00:08:39,296 --> 00:08:41,310
Shh. ( whispers ): Roxy Blue.
181
00:08:41,334 --> 00:08:42,313
( whispers ): Thank you.
182
00:08:42,337 --> 00:08:45,721
I own every record
you ever made.
183
00:08:45,745 --> 00:08:48,193
Is that so?
184
00:08:48,217 --> 00:08:51,736
Sister, I played Satin
Doll so many times,
185
00:08:51,760 --> 00:08:53,674
it is worn out.
186
00:08:53,698 --> 00:08:55,076
( laughs )
187
00:08:55,100 --> 00:08:58,319
Well, well, a real fan.
188
00:08:58,343 --> 00:09:02,730
And now you're here and
I'm actually talking to you.
189
00:09:02,754 --> 00:09:06,595
And you're even more
beautiful in person than...
190
00:09:09,571 --> 00:09:13,254
You know, uh, I kind of got
my nerve up to say something,
191
00:09:13,279 --> 00:09:17,322
and, uh, I think I better
say it before I lose it.
192
00:09:18,827 --> 00:09:20,239
( chuckles )
193
00:09:20,263 --> 00:09:23,682
Listen, um... Well,
you're on this ship,
194
00:09:23,706 --> 00:09:27,426
and so am I and...
195
00:09:27,450 --> 00:09:29,486
Well, I was wondering
if I could, um...
196
00:09:30,923 --> 00:09:33,306
see you, that's all.
197
00:09:33,330 --> 00:09:37,081
Well, you're lookin' at
me right now, sweetheart.
198
00:09:37,105 --> 00:09:38,786
Oh, no, no, no, no.
That's not what I mean.
199
00:09:38,810 --> 00:09:40,924
See, I... I kind
of want to, uh...
200
00:09:40,948 --> 00:09:42,952
Well, I... What
I'd like to do...
201
00:09:44,324 --> 00:09:45,335
( sighs )
202
00:09:45,359 --> 00:09:48,009
Ah, forget it.
203
00:09:48,033 --> 00:09:51,183
I mean, I'm just a bartender...
204
00:09:51,207 --> 00:09:52,542
and you're a star.
205
00:09:57,122 --> 00:10:01,544
Um... what time
do you get off work?
206
00:10:01,568 --> 00:10:03,135
In about an hour.
207
00:10:05,209 --> 00:10:06,644
Why don't we have one drink?
208
00:10:07,683 --> 00:10:09,598
One drink, mind you.
209
00:10:09,622 --> 00:10:10,866
In my suite.
210
00:10:10,890 --> 00:10:13,071
But, please, do me a favor:
211
00:10:13,095 --> 00:10:14,610
just keep it to yourself.
212
00:10:14,634 --> 00:10:17,551
I really don't want anybody
to know I'm on this ship.
213
00:10:17,575 --> 00:10:20,090
My lips are sealed, Miss Blue.
214
00:10:20,114 --> 00:10:22,228
Roxy.
215
00:10:22,252 --> 00:10:24,054
( mouths ): Roxy.
216
00:10:29,771 --> 00:10:32,119
Hey, captain. Oh,
I'm Mr. Tanner.
217
00:10:32,143 --> 00:10:33,757
Cabin A211, Aloha Deck.
218
00:10:33,781 --> 00:10:35,394
Well, how do you do.
I'm Captain Stubing.
219
00:10:35,418 --> 00:10:38,469
You know, it's an interesting
thing about that word, "aloha."
220
00:10:38,493 --> 00:10:40,608
You know, in Hawaiian
it means "goodbye,"
221
00:10:40,632 --> 00:10:43,180
but it also means "hello." True.
222
00:10:43,204 --> 00:10:45,554
Now, in English, we've
got two different words
223
00:10:45,578 --> 00:10:46,756
for "hello" and "goodbye."
224
00:10:46,780 --> 00:10:48,327
"Hello" and "goodbye."
225
00:10:48,351 --> 00:10:50,833
But in Hawaiian, they've
only got the one: "aloha."
226
00:10:50,857 --> 00:10:53,172
Aloha. Adios.
227
00:10:53,196 --> 00:10:55,310
I don't see how they
keep from gettin' confused.
228
00:10:55,335 --> 00:10:56,748
You know, like
being at an airport,
229
00:10:56,772 --> 00:10:58,719
and everybody saying, "aloha."
230
00:10:58,743 --> 00:10:59,956
Some of 'em meaning "hello,"
231
00:10:59,980 --> 00:11:01,694
and some of 'em meaning
"goodbye," you know,
232
00:11:01,718 --> 00:11:03,532
depending on whether
they're comin' or goin'.
233
00:11:03,556 --> 00:11:05,703
Yes. Well, uh, I
have to be going.
234
00:11:05,727 --> 00:11:06,973
Uh, aloha.
235
00:11:06,997 --> 00:11:08,610
Sometimes it's just
in the way you say it.
236
00:11:08,634 --> 00:11:10,337
Aloha!
237
00:11:13,548 --> 00:11:15,696
( mellow theme playing )
238
00:11:15,720 --> 00:11:16,721
( sighs )
239
00:11:33,598 --> 00:11:34,697
( door opens )
240
00:11:36,170 --> 00:11:37,404
Hi.
241
00:11:39,612 --> 00:11:41,158
Hi.
242
00:11:41,182 --> 00:11:42,896
You look nice.
243
00:11:42,920 --> 00:11:44,166
( giggles )
244
00:11:44,190 --> 00:11:45,804
I bet you say
that to all the girls,
245
00:11:45,828 --> 00:11:47,764
you smooth-talking devil, you.
246
00:11:50,204 --> 00:11:51,886
Listen, why don't
you come on inside.
247
00:11:51,910 --> 00:11:54,358
I'll play you some of my
favorite Ray Charles tapes,
248
00:11:54,382 --> 00:11:56,195
we put our feet
up, talk a little bit,
249
00:11:56,219 --> 00:11:59,505
and you'll tell
me about that suit
250
00:11:59,529 --> 00:12:02,935
and the herd of cows
that you got it from.
251
00:12:04,373 --> 00:12:05,495
( chuckles )
252
00:12:13,698 --> 00:12:15,634
( mellow theme playing )
253
00:12:18,041 --> 00:12:20,624
But I'm really not that
much of a photographer.
254
00:12:20,648 --> 00:12:23,598
All I need is some
candid shots of my wife.
255
00:12:23,623 --> 00:12:25,637
Then I can have 'em blown
up and hang 'em on the wall.
256
00:12:25,661 --> 00:12:26,906
Well, I can get
the blowups made.
257
00:12:26,930 --> 00:12:28,142
I mean, that's no problem.
258
00:12:28,166 --> 00:12:30,481
Neither are the candid
shots. What do you say?
259
00:12:30,505 --> 00:12:31,484
( sighs )
260
00:12:31,508 --> 00:12:32,486
Okay.
261
00:12:32,510 --> 00:12:34,190
Just don't let my wife see you.
262
00:12:34,214 --> 00:12:36,162
I want this whole
thing to be a surprise.
263
00:12:36,186 --> 00:12:39,672
Don't worry. Before this, I
used to be a hotel detective.
264
00:12:39,696 --> 00:12:41,576
And since that
night on the cruise
265
00:12:41,600 --> 00:12:43,213
when Miss America came aboard,
266
00:12:43,237 --> 00:12:45,017
I had to lock the door
to my cabin every night.
267
00:12:45,041 --> 00:12:46,621
Ahem. Morning, ma'am. Morning.
268
00:12:46,645 --> 00:12:47,925
Well, back to work.
269
00:12:47,949 --> 00:12:49,730
Gotta help the captain
find Puerto Vallarta.
270
00:12:49,754 --> 00:12:50,932
We're lost?
271
00:12:50,956 --> 00:12:52,269
It's just a joke, Denise.
272
00:12:52,293 --> 00:12:56,012
Oh. You know, he... He
seems very strange to me.
273
00:12:56,036 --> 00:12:57,717
He's a very sneaky man.
274
00:12:57,741 --> 00:12:59,287
Oh, you're right.
275
00:12:59,311 --> 00:13:01,960
It's his job. You see,
he's the Assistant Sneak.
276
00:13:01,984 --> 00:13:03,598
Aw. Funny.
277
00:13:03,622 --> 00:13:07,128
Ah, come on, Denise.
Lighten up, will ya?
278
00:13:12,778 --> 00:13:14,391
Hey there, sleepyhead.
279
00:13:14,415 --> 00:13:16,196
Can I get some service, please?
280
00:13:16,220 --> 00:13:19,303
You've got a person here
that really needs some coffee.
281
00:13:19,327 --> 00:13:22,834
Yes, indeed. Service
is my middle name.
282
00:13:25,877 --> 00:13:27,726
Uh, good morning.
283
00:13:27,750 --> 00:13:29,685
It certainly is.
284
00:13:31,726 --> 00:13:32,904
Hi.
285
00:13:32,928 --> 00:13:35,678
Hi. Want some coffee?
286
00:13:35,702 --> 00:13:38,952
No, just a coffee break.
Oh, it's not even noon,
287
00:13:38,976 --> 00:13:41,191
and my feet feel like
it's 3 in the morning.
288
00:13:41,215 --> 00:13:43,229
Well, I'm gonna have
to ask your feet to leave.
289
00:13:43,253 --> 00:13:44,622
This bar closes at 2.
290
00:13:45,995 --> 00:13:48,158
By the way, have you
seen Roxy Blue today?
291
00:13:49,771 --> 00:13:52,754
Roxy Blue.
292
00:13:52,778 --> 00:13:55,594
Now, that name
does sound familiar.
293
00:13:55,618 --> 00:13:57,732
Yeah, remember you said
you saw her get on board?
294
00:13:57,757 --> 00:14:00,428
Oh, that Roxy Blue.
295
00:14:01,801 --> 00:14:03,379
Well, the captain got wind of it
296
00:14:03,403 --> 00:14:04,851
and he's a big fan of hers,
297
00:14:04,875 --> 00:14:07,123
and he wants her to be his
guest at the farewell party.
298
00:14:07,147 --> 00:14:08,960
That is, if I can find her.
299
00:14:08,984 --> 00:14:10,665
If that was even her.
300
00:14:10,689 --> 00:14:12,335
Well, you know, I might
have been mistaken.
301
00:14:12,359 --> 00:14:14,241
That might not have been her.
302
00:14:14,265 --> 00:14:17,604
Besides, she sings like
George C. Scott anyway.
303
00:14:19,043 --> 00:14:20,858
Yeah. Will you keep
your eye out for her?
304
00:14:20,882 --> 00:14:22,428
Morning, Julie.
305
00:14:22,452 --> 00:14:24,366
Uh, where's the
shuffleboard tournament, huh?
306
00:14:24,390 --> 00:14:25,803
I was just on my way.
307
00:14:25,827 --> 00:14:27,228
Oh. Hi. Hi.
308
00:14:29,068 --> 00:14:31,450
Take care of those bunions.
309
00:14:31,474 --> 00:14:34,413
( light-hearted theme playing )
310
00:14:37,556 --> 00:14:40,773
I sing like George
C. Scott, huh?
311
00:14:40,797 --> 00:14:42,711
Only the high notes.
312
00:14:42,735 --> 00:14:45,051
You dog. Just you wait.
313
00:14:45,075 --> 00:14:47,123
I'm gonna get you for this.
314
00:14:47,147 --> 00:14:49,027
Promises, promises.
315
00:14:49,051 --> 00:14:50,353
( chuckles )
316
00:14:52,026 --> 00:14:53,962
( upbeat theme playing )
317
00:14:55,735 --> 00:14:58,084
So the jeweler was supposed
to have the bracelet ready
318
00:14:58,108 --> 00:15:01,157
before I left, but he goofed.
319
00:15:01,181 --> 00:15:05,201
So now I don't have a
birthday present for Denise.
320
00:15:05,225 --> 00:15:07,173
I tell you what.
321
00:15:07,197 --> 00:15:09,077
Later, I'll go down to
the gift shop with you
322
00:15:09,101 --> 00:15:10,481
and help you pick something out.
323
00:15:10,505 --> 00:15:11,951
Oh, that'll be hard.
324
00:15:11,975 --> 00:15:14,124
Every time I turn
around, Denise is there.
325
00:15:14,148 --> 00:15:16,084
( playful theme playing )
326
00:15:28,750 --> 00:15:31,734
Well, then, why don't you
come down with me now?
327
00:15:31,758 --> 00:15:33,104
I can't.
328
00:15:33,128 --> 00:15:35,744
If I stay away too long,
Denise will get suspicious.
329
00:15:35,768 --> 00:15:37,749
Then there's only
one thing we can do.
330
00:15:37,773 --> 00:15:39,520
We'll just have
to get rid of her.
331
00:15:39,544 --> 00:15:41,758
BRETT: That's not a bad idea.
332
00:15:41,782 --> 00:15:43,196
JULIE: I'll see you later.
333
00:15:43,220 --> 00:15:44,621
Right.
334
00:15:52,610 --> 00:15:54,190
Oh, hi, honey.
335
00:15:54,214 --> 00:15:57,899
Can I join you, or is
your friend coming back?
336
00:15:57,923 --> 00:15:59,136
My friend?
337
00:15:59,160 --> 00:16:00,728
The girl you don't know.
338
00:16:02,267 --> 00:16:03,580
You mean Julie?
339
00:16:03,604 --> 00:16:05,619
Oh, come on.
340
00:16:05,643 --> 00:16:06,921
She's just doing her job:
341
00:16:06,945 --> 00:16:08,592
trying to keep the
passengers happy.
342
00:16:08,616 --> 00:16:09,729
Strange.
343
00:16:09,753 --> 00:16:11,299
I'm a passenger, and she hasn't
344
00:16:11,323 --> 00:16:12,602
sat down with me once.
345
00:16:12,626 --> 00:16:15,899
Denise, please.
346
00:16:17,639 --> 00:16:19,587
What were you two talking about?
347
00:16:19,611 --> 00:16:20,822
Oh, nothing.
348
00:16:20,846 --> 00:16:22,427
Nothing. Just small talk.
349
00:16:22,451 --> 00:16:25,367
I bet you'd rather be on this
cruise alone, wouldn't you?
350
00:16:25,391 --> 00:16:26,371
Of course not.
351
00:16:26,395 --> 00:16:28,409
Just you and the
little pretty blond.
352
00:16:28,433 --> 00:16:29,579
That is ridiculous.
353
00:16:29,603 --> 00:16:31,216
Without old married
me in the way.
354
00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:32,585
You're being ridiculous. Just...
355
00:16:32,609 --> 00:16:34,324
Well, I'm not giving
you a divorce,
356
00:16:34,348 --> 00:16:36,295
and that's final!
357
00:16:36,319 --> 00:16:38,256
( tense theme playing )
358
00:16:45,208 --> 00:16:46,988
You should've known, Denise.
359
00:16:47,013 --> 00:16:50,230
Ooh, you should've known he
had something up his sleeve when...
360
00:16:50,254 --> 00:16:52,603
When he decided on this
cruise at the spur of the moment.
361
00:16:52,627 --> 00:16:53,906
Ha-ha.
362
00:16:53,930 --> 00:16:55,866
( melancholy theme playing )
363
00:16:58,508 --> 00:17:00,923
Then why...?
364
00:17:00,947 --> 00:17:03,897
( sobbing ): Why
didn't I realize it?
365
00:17:03,921 --> 00:17:05,289
Why didn't I know?
366
00:17:06,361 --> 00:17:07,505
( chuckling )
367
00:17:07,530 --> 00:17:09,477
Why didn't you know?!
368
00:17:09,501 --> 00:17:13,287
Because we wives are
always the last to find out.
369
00:17:13,311 --> 00:17:15,894
Listen to me, Denise,
this is only a fling.
370
00:17:15,918 --> 00:17:17,665
He'll get over it. Ha!
371
00:17:17,689 --> 00:17:20,539
Now, I want you to
get up, go have dinner,
372
00:17:20,563 --> 00:17:22,077
and act like you're having fun.
373
00:17:22,101 --> 00:17:23,479
Ha.
374
00:17:23,503 --> 00:17:25,184
( chuckles )
375
00:17:25,208 --> 00:17:28,793
Act like I'm having... Ah!
376
00:17:28,817 --> 00:17:30,720
Fun. ( phone rings )
377
00:17:31,858 --> 00:17:36,801
Oh, I have to answer...
I'll be right back.
378
00:17:39,911 --> 00:17:41,156
( sniffles )
379
00:17:41,180 --> 00:17:42,661
( low-voiced ): Hello?
380
00:17:42,685 --> 00:17:44,365
Mr. Fredericks,
381
00:17:44,389 --> 00:17:46,738
I haven't been able to get
a clean shot at your wife
382
00:17:46,762 --> 00:17:47,874
all day long.
383
00:17:47,898 --> 00:17:49,645
( suspenseful theme playing )
384
00:17:49,669 --> 00:17:52,452
See, I told you I
wasn't very good at this.
385
00:17:52,476 --> 00:17:54,719
I think maybe you'd
better do it yourself.
386
00:17:56,085 --> 00:17:58,589
But I can still arrange
to have her blown up.
387
00:18:02,401 --> 00:18:04,915
Who...?
388
00:18:04,939 --> 00:18:06,709
Whhhho...?
389
00:18:08,916 --> 00:18:10,759
( normal voice ): Who is this?
390
00:18:22,684 --> 00:18:24,332
( gasps ): Whoa,
it's that Mr. Tanner.
391
00:18:24,356 --> 00:18:25,333
Come on, Harvey, let's go.
392
00:18:25,357 --> 00:18:27,070
Will you sit down?
393
00:18:27,094 --> 00:18:28,809
I came on this
cruise for a rest,
394
00:18:28,833 --> 00:18:30,581
not to be playing
hide and go seek.
395
00:18:30,605 --> 00:18:32,285
Hey! Hey there!
Oh, it's too late.
396
00:18:32,309 --> 00:18:34,224
If he asks one more time
what we had for dinner,
397
00:18:34,248 --> 00:18:36,662
I'll slap his face.
398
00:18:36,686 --> 00:18:38,767
Hi. You mind if I join you?
399
00:18:38,791 --> 00:18:41,039
Uh, no, no. Sit down.
400
00:18:41,063 --> 00:18:42,477
What did you have for dinner?
401
00:18:42,501 --> 00:18:44,303
( moans )
402
00:18:46,678 --> 00:18:47,657
Liver and onions.
403
00:18:47,681 --> 00:18:49,293
No foolin'.
404
00:18:49,317 --> 00:18:51,834
You know, I was gonna
have liver and onions.
405
00:18:51,858 --> 00:18:53,102
As a matter of fact,
406
00:18:53,126 --> 00:18:54,841
I went so far as to order
the liver and onions,
407
00:18:54,865 --> 00:18:55,877
and then I changed my order.
408
00:18:55,901 --> 00:18:57,481
Really? Hm-hm.
409
00:18:57,505 --> 00:18:59,754
Yup. It's a funny thing about
me and liver and onions.
410
00:18:59,778 --> 00:19:01,523
I order it a lot,
411
00:19:01,547 --> 00:19:04,030
but then most of the time I
always end up changin' my order.
412
00:19:04,054 --> 00:19:06,437
Not all the time, but
just most of the time.
413
00:19:06,461 --> 00:19:09,042
That would make
a wonderful movie.
414
00:19:09,066 --> 00:19:11,583
You know, I was just settin'
over there with some people
415
00:19:11,607 --> 00:19:13,253
who must not have
had a very good dinner.
416
00:19:13,277 --> 00:19:15,727
Because suddenly all three
of 'em started getting queasy.
417
00:19:15,751 --> 00:19:17,732
Really? What'd they have?
418
00:19:17,756 --> 00:19:19,971
I don't know. I never did
get a chance to ask 'em.
419
00:19:19,995 --> 00:19:21,841
Well, that's what I
had. Harvey, listen,
420
00:19:21,865 --> 00:19:23,111
I'm getting a little queasy too.
421
00:19:23,135 --> 00:19:25,283
Good night, Mr. Tanner.
422
00:19:25,307 --> 00:19:27,430
Good night. Good night.
423
00:19:27,780 --> 00:19:30,229
( dramatic theme playing )
424
00:19:30,253 --> 00:19:33,102
Gosh, I better watch what I eat.
425
00:19:33,126 --> 00:19:36,379
Well, what finally
happens is that you, uh...
426
00:19:36,403 --> 00:19:37,948
You lose control.
427
00:19:37,972 --> 00:19:39,418
I mean, heh,
428
00:19:39,442 --> 00:19:42,694
I'm not just Roxy
Blue, working girl.
429
00:19:42,718 --> 00:19:45,232
I'm Roxy Blue Enterprises,
430
00:19:45,256 --> 00:19:48,475
Roxy Publishing, Roxy Records,
431
00:19:48,499 --> 00:19:51,717
Roxy Limited, London.
432
00:19:51,741 --> 00:19:55,458
Hm-hm. I'm a damn conglomerate.
433
00:19:55,482 --> 00:20:01,239
But I'm also bones
and nerve endings,
434
00:20:01,263 --> 00:20:03,780
and, you know, all that jazz.
435
00:20:03,804 --> 00:20:09,360
I suppose I just
really needed... to rest.
436
00:20:09,384 --> 00:20:11,599
Yeah, but you walked
out on Bob Hope.
437
00:20:11,624 --> 00:20:13,872
I mean, that's
like walking out on
438
00:20:13,896 --> 00:20:15,643
Bob Hope.
439
00:20:15,667 --> 00:20:18,617
So they'll get Donny and Marie.
440
00:20:18,641 --> 00:20:20,489
Oh, nobody will
know the difference.
441
00:20:20,513 --> 00:20:23,428
Yeah. You know, I always
get you three mixed up.
442
00:20:23,452 --> 00:20:24,932
( giggles )
443
00:20:24,956 --> 00:20:27,606
All right, so I'll pass
up one TV guest shot.
444
00:20:27,631 --> 00:20:30,145
To cruise on the
Pacific Princess
445
00:20:30,169 --> 00:20:32,652
( with Caribbean accent ):
with a very sexy bartender.
446
00:20:32,676 --> 00:20:35,058
Who thinks I sing
like George C. Scott.
447
00:20:35,082 --> 00:20:38,600
Now, don't get sexy
with me, please.
448
00:20:38,624 --> 00:20:39,937
I told you.
449
00:20:39,961 --> 00:20:43,612
You are messing with a very
vengeful corporation here.
450
00:20:43,637 --> 00:20:45,384
You know I was only having fun.
451
00:20:45,408 --> 00:20:48,190
You don't sing a bit
like George C. Scott.
452
00:20:48,214 --> 00:20:49,928
More like Lee Marvin.
453
00:20:49,952 --> 00:20:51,700
( giggles )
454
00:20:51,724 --> 00:20:54,027
Why don't you just
shut up and kiss me?
455
00:20:55,298 --> 00:20:57,703
Can't turn down a
vengeful corporation.
456
00:21:01,481 --> 00:21:03,417
( upbeat theme playing )
457
00:21:31,054 --> 00:21:32,991
( light-hearted theme playing )
458
00:21:34,797 --> 00:21:36,344
( gasps )
459
00:21:36,368 --> 00:21:37,614
( humming )
460
00:21:37,638 --> 00:21:39,318
So that's all
there is to it, huh?
461
00:21:39,342 --> 00:21:40,688
You just let go of the skeet
462
00:21:40,712 --> 00:21:43,562
and I try to pop
it off in midair.
463
00:21:43,586 --> 00:21:45,668
Hey, Denise!
464
00:21:45,692 --> 00:21:46,825
Denise!
465
00:21:48,098 --> 00:21:50,279
Hey!
466
00:21:50,303 --> 00:21:52,986
( yelling )
467
00:21:53,010 --> 00:21:54,923
( shutter clicking )
468
00:21:54,947 --> 00:21:56,015
( yells )
469
00:22:08,982 --> 00:22:11,219
( mellow theme playing )
470
00:22:12,424 --> 00:22:14,127
Doctor. Oh!
471
00:22:15,198 --> 00:22:16,444
I have to talk to somebody.
472
00:22:16,468 --> 00:22:17,948
My husband's trying
to kill me. Whoa.
473
00:22:17,972 --> 00:22:19,450
Slow down, Mrs. Fredericks.
474
00:22:19,474 --> 00:22:21,089
He's in love with another
woman and they...
475
00:22:21,113 --> 00:22:22,158
They want me out of the way.
476
00:22:22,182 --> 00:22:23,327
Easy. Easy, Mrs. Fredericks.
477
00:22:23,351 --> 00:22:24,865
It's a conspiracy. No, no, no.
478
00:22:24,889 --> 00:22:26,904
He's in cahoots with half
the people on the ship.
479
00:22:26,928 --> 00:22:28,641
I'm sure you're
mistaken, Mrs. Fredericks.
480
00:22:28,665 --> 00:22:30,045
( grunts ) Come
on into my office.
481
00:22:30,069 --> 00:22:31,717
I'll give you something
to help you relax.
482
00:22:31,741 --> 00:22:33,185
A mild sedative. ( gasps )
483
00:22:33,209 --> 00:22:36,127
You'll feel much better
when you get some sleep.
484
00:22:36,151 --> 00:22:38,788
You're in on it too.
485
00:22:43,068 --> 00:22:45,004
( light-hearted theme playing )
486
00:22:53,059 --> 00:22:56,510
Well, everybody seems to be
having a good time, Miss McCoy.
487
00:22:56,534 --> 00:22:57,847
Yes, sir.
488
00:22:57,871 --> 00:23:00,354
Well, sun, fun and rum is
an unbeatable combination.
489
00:23:00,378 --> 00:23:01,992
( chuckles )
490
00:23:02,016 --> 00:23:05,132
I wonder what's the matter
with Mr. Tanner up there.
491
00:23:05,156 --> 00:23:06,970
Is he talked out?
492
00:23:06,994 --> 00:23:07,973
( scoffs )
493
00:23:07,997 --> 00:23:10,479
Is Vesuvius out of
lava? ( chuckles )
494
00:23:10,503 --> 00:23:12,016
No, sir, he's a nice guy.
495
00:23:12,040 --> 00:23:13,854
He's just kind of boring.
496
00:23:13,878 --> 00:23:16,561
Well, we all have
faults, Miss McCoy.
497
00:23:16,585 --> 00:23:18,900
But I want all the passengers
to have a good time.
498
00:23:18,924 --> 00:23:20,037
Consider that a challenge.
499
00:23:20,061 --> 00:23:23,544
Swimming the English
Channel is a challenge.
500
00:23:23,568 --> 00:23:25,216
This is impossible.
501
00:23:25,240 --> 00:23:26,854
GOPHER: Los Angeles
newspapers, anyone?
502
00:23:26,878 --> 00:23:27,856
WOMAN: I'll have one.
503
00:23:27,880 --> 00:23:29,459
Here you go, ma'am.
504
00:23:29,483 --> 00:23:33,469
Los Angeles papers.
Los Angeles papers.
505
00:23:33,493 --> 00:23:35,507
Got a problem? Yeah.
506
00:23:35,531 --> 00:23:38,415
I'm running out of passengers
to assign to Mr. Tanner's table.
507
00:23:38,439 --> 00:23:40,453
Nobody seems to
make it through dessert.
508
00:23:40,477 --> 00:23:42,425
What about that
little old deaf lady?
509
00:23:42,449 --> 00:23:43,930
Look, I tried her,
510
00:23:43,954 --> 00:23:48,307
but she reads lips and she says
that Mr. Tanner has boring lips.
511
00:23:48,331 --> 00:23:49,878
Let me try.
512
00:23:49,902 --> 00:23:54,388
Hey, folks, uh, how would you
like to share your table tonight
513
00:23:54,412 --> 00:23:56,048
with Mr. Tanner?
514
00:23:58,957 --> 00:24:00,403
Does that mean maybe?
515
00:24:00,427 --> 00:24:02,275
Huh. What about you?
516
00:24:02,299 --> 00:24:04,313
What about you? I
thought I'd eat in my room.
517
00:24:04,337 --> 00:24:07,120
You know, enjoy my own
conversation for a change.
518
00:24:07,144 --> 00:24:08,925
( both laugh )
519
00:24:08,949 --> 00:24:10,863
My goodness.
520
00:24:10,887 --> 00:24:12,500
Harvey? Hm?
521
00:24:12,524 --> 00:24:15,074
Who does that look like?
522
00:24:15,098 --> 00:24:16,643
Mm, it's hard to see.
523
00:24:16,667 --> 00:24:18,481
Hat covers a lot of his face.
524
00:24:18,505 --> 00:24:21,758
That's Mr. Tanner.
I'm sure of it.
525
00:24:21,782 --> 00:24:23,127
Yeah, could be.
526
00:24:23,151 --> 00:24:24,998
It's the exact same kind of hat.
527
00:24:25,022 --> 00:24:27,237
But what's his picture
doing in the paper?
528
00:24:27,261 --> 00:24:29,508
What'd he do, win
the Pillsbury Bore-Off?
529
00:24:29,532 --> 00:24:32,550
Listen to this: "Los
Angeles police report
530
00:24:32,574 --> 00:24:34,188
"that despite an
intensive dragnet,
531
00:24:34,212 --> 00:24:36,693
"Roscoe Toler,
international jewel thief,
532
00:24:36,718 --> 00:24:38,732
has once again eluded capture ."
533
00:24:38,756 --> 00:24:41,472
"Roscoe Toler, jewel thief"?
534
00:24:41,496 --> 00:24:44,146
R.T.
535
00:24:44,170 --> 00:24:47,054
Those are the same
initials as Robert Tanner.
536
00:24:47,078 --> 00:24:48,156
That's him.
537
00:24:48,180 --> 00:24:49,392
You know, I think you're right.
538
00:24:49,416 --> 00:24:52,700
I knew that hick
accent was phony.
539
00:24:52,724 --> 00:24:54,772
Should we tell the captain?
540
00:24:54,796 --> 00:24:55,810
Why?
541
00:24:55,834 --> 00:24:58,248
So he can arrest him.
542
00:24:58,272 --> 00:25:01,924
Harvey, let the
captain arrest him later.
543
00:25:01,948 --> 00:25:03,694
Huh?
544
00:25:03,718 --> 00:25:06,836
First, let's... Let's
get to know him.
545
00:25:06,860 --> 00:25:08,707
I mean, how many
people do you know
546
00:25:08,731 --> 00:25:11,146
that can say that
they're best friends
547
00:25:11,170 --> 00:25:13,843
with an international
jewel thief?
548
00:25:15,214 --> 00:25:17,350
Two, maybe three, tops.
549
00:25:18,589 --> 00:25:20,403
( dramatic theme playing )
550
00:25:20,427 --> 00:25:23,344
GOPHER: You and Roxy Blue?
551
00:25:23,368 --> 00:25:25,582
Hey, man, this is
Isaac Washington.
552
00:25:25,606 --> 00:25:27,922
I mean, yeah, I know
I'm just a bartender
553
00:25:27,946 --> 00:25:31,833
and she's a star, but
you gotta know her.
554
00:25:31,857 --> 00:25:35,095
I mean, she's not like a star.
555
00:25:36,467 --> 00:25:38,037
She's...
556
00:25:39,541 --> 00:25:41,824
like a woman.
557
00:25:41,848 --> 00:25:44,752
I mean, you know, she's like...
558
00:25:45,656 --> 00:25:47,136
( sighs )
559
00:25:47,160 --> 00:25:49,810
Well, she's like
the kind of woman
560
00:25:49,835 --> 00:25:51,347
you wanna marry.
561
00:25:51,371 --> 00:25:54,154
( laughs ): Come on, be serious.
562
00:25:54,178 --> 00:25:55,657
I am serious.
563
00:25:55,681 --> 00:25:57,551
I think you are.
564
00:25:58,957 --> 00:26:00,370
I'm happy for you, man. Really.
565
00:26:00,394 --> 00:26:02,241
Thanks, Gopher.
566
00:26:02,265 --> 00:26:04,881
Now, you're sure that
she's the right one for you?
567
00:26:04,905 --> 00:26:08,545
Gopher, when you
meet the right woman,
568
00:26:10,118 --> 00:26:11,798
you know it.
569
00:26:11,822 --> 00:26:14,004
( chuckles )
570
00:26:14,028 --> 00:26:15,965
( tender theme playing )
571
00:26:18,205 --> 00:26:20,509
( upbeat theme playing )
572
00:26:22,149 --> 00:26:23,527
Don't worry, sir.
573
00:26:23,551 --> 00:26:25,432
Anything you want, I'll make.
574
00:26:25,456 --> 00:26:26,635
You name it.
575
00:26:26,659 --> 00:26:29,508
Just a small chocolate
cake. And on top:
576
00:26:29,532 --> 00:26:31,747
"Happy Birthday, Denise."
577
00:26:31,771 --> 00:26:32,918
Fine.
578
00:26:32,942 --> 00:26:37,729
"A beautiful wife and
a dedicated mother."
579
00:26:37,753 --> 00:26:38,967
Yes, sir.
580
00:26:38,991 --> 00:26:43,344
"With all my love,
"forever and ever
581
00:26:43,368 --> 00:26:45,315
till the end of time."
582
00:26:45,339 --> 00:26:46,318
That's it?
583
00:26:46,342 --> 00:26:47,821
Yeah. Oh...
584
00:26:47,845 --> 00:26:51,063
And I'd like it all spelled
out in strawberries.
585
00:26:51,087 --> 00:26:53,035
Strawberries?
586
00:26:53,059 --> 00:26:55,306
How about pineapples?
587
00:26:55,330 --> 00:26:57,500
( upbeat jazz music playing )
588
00:27:05,388 --> 00:27:08,206
I'm sorry I'm late, but I
just ordered the cake.
589
00:27:08,230 --> 00:27:10,545
I've never seen a man
go through so much trouble
590
00:27:10,569 --> 00:27:12,182
to give his wife
a surprise party.
591
00:27:12,206 --> 00:27:13,987
( sighing ): Oh, she's worth it.
592
00:27:14,011 --> 00:27:15,858
I found the
perfect gift for her.
593
00:27:15,882 --> 00:27:16,927
Oh yeah?
594
00:27:16,951 --> 00:27:19,066
It's a gold choker. Beautiful.
595
00:27:19,090 --> 00:27:21,906
A gold choker. You
know, that's a terrific idea.
596
00:27:21,930 --> 00:27:24,914
Good. By the way, what
size neck does she have?
597
00:27:24,938 --> 00:27:26,885
I don't know. Why?
598
00:27:26,909 --> 00:27:29,591
Well, it should fit
snugly to looks its best.
599
00:27:29,615 --> 00:27:31,296
Oh. What am I gonna do?
600
00:27:31,320 --> 00:27:34,037
I can't ask her her size,
because that'll give it away.
601
00:27:34,061 --> 00:27:35,807
And I can't just walk
up to her and measure it.
602
00:27:35,832 --> 00:27:38,103
Ooh, that's right.
603
00:27:45,455 --> 00:27:47,191
You got any ideas?
604
00:27:48,497 --> 00:27:50,478
Yes.
605
00:27:50,502 --> 00:27:52,449
Tonight, wait
until she's asleep,
606
00:27:52,473 --> 00:27:55,289
and then take the sash
from your bathrobe,
607
00:27:55,313 --> 00:27:56,727
and slip it around her neck...
608
00:27:56,751 --> 00:27:58,653
( mysterious theme playing )
609
00:28:13,358 --> 00:28:14,360
Oh!
610
00:28:46,808 --> 00:28:47,809
( gasps )
611
00:28:49,315 --> 00:28:51,252
( breathing heavily )
612
00:28:56,066 --> 00:28:57,667
( whimpers )
613
00:29:01,044 --> 00:29:03,148
Pull yourself together, Denise.
614
00:29:04,586 --> 00:29:06,667
That's better.
615
00:29:06,691 --> 00:29:08,306
Now, remember,
616
00:29:08,330 --> 00:29:10,344
when he knocks on
the door, don't let him in.
617
00:29:10,368 --> 00:29:11,747
Don't let him in all night.
618
00:29:11,771 --> 00:29:13,318
What'd you say? Agh!
619
00:29:13,342 --> 00:29:15,925
Oh, Denise, you look beautiful.
620
00:29:15,949 --> 00:29:17,394
What are you... doing here?
621
00:29:17,418 --> 00:29:19,968
Don't you remember?
We share a room.
622
00:29:19,992 --> 00:29:22,341
Honey, something the matter?
623
00:29:22,365 --> 00:29:24,146
No, oh. Ha-ha-ha-ha.
624
00:29:24,170 --> 00:29:27,286
No, nothing. I... I'm just
really not feeling very well.
625
00:29:27,310 --> 00:29:29,123
I have a cold, a slight cold.
626
00:29:29,147 --> 00:29:30,461
Oh, poor baby.
627
00:29:30,485 --> 00:29:32,031
Let me take a
look at your throat.
628
00:29:32,055 --> 00:29:35,105
No! Uh... it's nothing.
629
00:29:35,129 --> 00:29:36,576
I... You know,
630
00:29:36,600 --> 00:29:39,416
I think it's probably
better if I stayed in, though.
631
00:29:39,440 --> 00:29:40,886
Yes.
632
00:29:40,910 --> 00:29:42,724
Why... Why don't you go dancing.
633
00:29:42,748 --> 00:29:44,128
Alone?
634
00:29:44,152 --> 00:29:47,971
The way they dance
today, it doesn't matter.
635
00:29:47,995 --> 00:29:49,174
( giggles nervously )
636
00:29:49,199 --> 00:29:50,678
I, uh...
637
00:29:50,702 --> 00:29:52,248
I can't have a good
time without you,
638
00:29:52,272 --> 00:29:55,289
so why don't I stay in too.
639
00:29:55,313 --> 00:29:57,160
Hm? We'll relax,
640
00:29:57,184 --> 00:30:00,324
and, um, I'll catch
up on some reading.
641
00:30:03,234 --> 00:30:05,168
( suspenseful theme playing )
642
00:30:07,444 --> 00:30:09,725
( laughter )
643
00:30:09,749 --> 00:30:13,501
I had the veal
curry, three helpings.
644
00:30:13,525 --> 00:30:15,306
I had steak tartare.
645
00:30:15,330 --> 00:30:17,311
Please, Mr. Tanner
is our friend.
646
00:30:17,335 --> 00:30:19,698
Some people are so pushy.
647
00:30:21,044 --> 00:30:23,927
Would you like to know
what I had for dinner?
648
00:30:23,951 --> 00:30:26,267
I sure would.
That'd be real nice.
649
00:30:26,291 --> 00:30:28,973
Well, I had rack of lamb.
650
00:30:28,997 --> 00:30:30,611
Why didn't I think of that?
651
00:30:30,635 --> 00:30:32,114
Are you sure it
wasn't the leg of lamb?
652
00:30:32,138 --> 00:30:34,153
Didn't I have rack of lamb?
Tell him I had rack of lamb.
653
00:30:34,177 --> 00:30:35,890
Yes, she did. She
had the rack of lamb.
654
00:30:35,914 --> 00:30:37,527
What vegetables did you have?
655
00:30:37,551 --> 00:30:39,900
Broccoli. Golly.
656
00:30:39,925 --> 00:30:41,070
Oh, I had carrots.
657
00:30:41,094 --> 00:30:42,441
Brussels sprouts.
658
00:30:42,465 --> 00:30:43,443
I had zucchini.
659
00:30:43,467 --> 00:30:45,614
More important than what we had,
660
00:30:45,638 --> 00:30:48,356
Mr. Tanner, what did
you have for dinner?
661
00:30:48,380 --> 00:30:51,261
Well, you know how I
always order liver and onions,
662
00:30:51,286 --> 00:30:53,735
and then at the last
minute I change my order?
663
00:30:53,759 --> 00:30:55,339
Well, this time I didn't
change my order.
664
00:30:55,363 --> 00:30:56,742
I had the liver and onions.
665
00:30:56,766 --> 00:30:58,268
( all laugh )
666
00:31:00,877 --> 00:31:03,025
That's a beautiful
necklace, Mrs. Grove.
667
00:31:03,049 --> 00:31:04,963
Oh, thank you.
668
00:31:04,987 --> 00:31:06,601
Isn't it, Mr. Tanner?
669
00:31:06,625 --> 00:31:08,372
Oh, it sure is. But to
be honest with you,
670
00:31:08,396 --> 00:31:10,109
I don't really know
that much about jewelry.
671
00:31:10,133 --> 00:31:11,479
Oh!
672
00:31:11,503 --> 00:31:13,885
( all laugh )
673
00:31:13,909 --> 00:31:15,255
Well, you know, now,
674
00:31:15,279 --> 00:31:17,059
tomorrow night's
our last night out.
675
00:31:17,083 --> 00:31:19,399
And I have really given
a lot of thought to this.
676
00:31:19,423 --> 00:31:21,838
And I'm gonna
have the roast beef.
677
00:31:21,862 --> 00:31:22,841
Rare. Rare.
678
00:31:22,865 --> 00:31:24,679
( all applaud and cheer )
679
00:31:24,703 --> 00:31:26,271
You must sit at our table.
680
00:31:30,617 --> 00:31:32,498
Denise.
681
00:31:32,522 --> 00:31:34,670
Denise, why don't you go to bed?
682
00:31:34,694 --> 00:31:35,935
It's midnight.
683
00:31:37,602 --> 00:31:39,951
I'm hungry. I... I want
another sandwich.
684
00:31:39,975 --> 00:31:41,655
Denise,
685
00:31:41,679 --> 00:31:44,529
you've ordered up from
room service seven times.
686
00:31:44,553 --> 00:31:46,155
Come on.
687
00:31:47,727 --> 00:31:50,075
It's late.
688
00:31:50,099 --> 00:31:51,312
You'll be dead in the morning.
689
00:31:51,336 --> 00:31:53,384
( mysterious theme playing )
690
00:31:53,408 --> 00:31:54,410
Come on.
691
00:31:55,647 --> 00:31:56,926
Okay.
692
00:31:56,950 --> 00:31:59,967
I-I just wanna finish
reading this book first.
693
00:31:59,991 --> 00:32:02,072
I-I'm at the most exciting part.
694
00:32:02,096 --> 00:32:03,398
What page are you on?
695
00:32:04,503 --> 00:32:05,903
Three.
696
00:32:08,212 --> 00:32:10,627
( romantic theme playing )
697
00:32:10,651 --> 00:32:13,868
You know, all we've got
is what's left of tonight,
698
00:32:13,892 --> 00:32:16,008
then tomorrow night
and then it's all over.
699
00:32:16,032 --> 00:32:19,582
Yeah. That's about it.
700
00:32:19,606 --> 00:32:22,524
Roxy, nothing better than this
701
00:32:22,548 --> 00:32:24,127
has ever happened
to me in my whole life.
702
00:32:24,151 --> 00:32:27,703
Don't go getting
sentimental on me. Please.
703
00:32:27,727 --> 00:32:29,173
I mean it.
704
00:32:29,197 --> 00:32:31,311
Deep in my heart, I mean it.
705
00:32:31,335 --> 00:32:34,286
Deep in... What's with this
"deep in your heart" business?
706
00:32:34,310 --> 00:32:35,590
I'm on vacation.
707
00:32:35,614 --> 00:32:37,260
What are you getting mad about?
708
00:32:37,284 --> 00:32:40,836
Because you're getting
serious on me. Knock it off.
709
00:32:40,860 --> 00:32:42,240
I won't knock it off.
710
00:32:42,264 --> 00:32:44,245
Can't you see where
I'm comin' from?
711
00:32:44,269 --> 00:32:45,270
I love you.
712
00:32:46,306 --> 00:32:48,722
Don't say that anymore.
713
00:32:48,746 --> 00:32:50,126
What?
714
00:32:50,150 --> 00:32:51,696
"I love you"?
715
00:32:51,720 --> 00:32:53,233
I do.
716
00:32:53,257 --> 00:32:56,363
I love you more than I've
loved anybody before in my life.
717
00:32:57,902 --> 00:33:01,219
Well, you just blew that.
718
00:33:01,243 --> 00:33:03,893
You're acting like I
said something dirty.
719
00:33:03,917 --> 00:33:06,432
You're supposed to like it when
someone says they love you.
720
00:33:06,456 --> 00:33:08,539
You're supposed to
say "I love you too."
721
00:33:08,563 --> 00:33:11,046
And everybody's so happy
that they can't see straight.
722
00:33:12,506 --> 00:33:15,421
You really don't
understand, do you?
723
00:33:15,445 --> 00:33:17,426
I understand how I feel.
724
00:33:17,450 --> 00:33:20,034
You know, a lot of people
725
00:33:20,058 --> 00:33:22,272
have been bugging me
to get out of this cabin.
726
00:33:22,296 --> 00:33:24,311
I think I'll take up
727
00:33:24,335 --> 00:33:26,383
that standing invitation
from your captain.
728
00:33:26,407 --> 00:33:28,889
Isn't there gonna be a
farewell party tomorrow night?
729
00:33:28,913 --> 00:33:30,660
What's that got to
do with anything?
730
00:33:30,684 --> 00:33:33,033
Well, aren't you
going to be there?
731
00:33:33,057 --> 00:33:34,804
Of course I am. I'm working.
732
00:33:34,828 --> 00:33:37,476
Fine. I think we should
just get some sleep.
733
00:33:37,500 --> 00:33:39,248
It's getting late.
734
00:33:39,272 --> 00:33:40,652
I don't want to.
735
00:33:40,676 --> 00:33:42,256
Now, Roxy, I know you love me.
736
00:33:42,280 --> 00:33:43,992
Now, why can't you just
come out and admit it?
737
00:33:44,017 --> 00:33:48,271
Isaac... Close your eyes.
738
00:33:48,295 --> 00:33:51,078
We have tonight, tomorrow night
739
00:33:51,102 --> 00:33:53,383
and then it's over.
740
00:33:53,407 --> 00:33:54,987
Roxy, I just love you
so much. I know that.
741
00:33:55,011 --> 00:33:56,324
Oh, please, hush.
742
00:33:56,348 --> 00:33:59,465
( sighs )
743
00:33:59,489 --> 00:34:02,840
There's gonna be a
big party tomorrow night.
744
00:34:02,864 --> 00:34:06,884
Roxy Blue's gonna be there.
745
00:34:06,908 --> 00:34:10,683
So just hush and
let's go to sleep.
746
00:34:12,421 --> 00:34:14,358
( eerie theme playing )
747
00:34:19,505 --> 00:34:20,507
Denise?
748
00:34:22,313 --> 00:34:23,995
Are you asleep, honey?
749
00:34:28,696 --> 00:34:30,632
( playful theme playing )
750
00:34:56,131 --> 00:34:58,346
Aagh!
751
00:34:58,370 --> 00:35:02,055
Help! Murderer!
He's trying to kill me!
752
00:35:02,079 --> 00:35:03,714
Denise!
753
00:35:07,259 --> 00:35:08,504
( all chattering indistinctly )
754
00:35:08,528 --> 00:35:10,142
He's a murderer.
755
00:35:10,166 --> 00:35:11,167
So is he.
756
00:35:12,304 --> 00:35:14,285
Stop. Silence.
757
00:35:14,309 --> 00:35:16,557
Quiet!
758
00:35:16,581 --> 00:35:18,662
Would it be too
much for one person
759
00:35:18,687 --> 00:35:20,334
to explain what is happening
760
00:35:20,358 --> 00:35:23,942
in a simple, quiet,
logical, calm manner?
761
00:35:23,966 --> 00:35:25,780
Yes, sir... ( all chattering )
762
00:35:25,804 --> 00:35:28,543
I said, one person.
763
00:35:31,051 --> 00:35:33,333
You.
764
00:35:33,357 --> 00:35:34,737
Well, captain, it all started
765
00:35:34,761 --> 00:35:37,309
because I wanted to give my wife
766
00:35:37,333 --> 00:35:39,114
a surprise birthday party.
767
00:35:39,138 --> 00:35:41,353
Why didn't you tell me that?
768
00:35:41,377 --> 00:35:44,082
If I had told you, it wouldn't
have been a surprise.
769
00:35:45,420 --> 00:35:49,473
Oh, then who was that
man on the telephone
770
00:35:49,497 --> 00:35:51,433
who said he was
trying to shoot me?
771
00:35:52,939 --> 00:35:56,825
I confess. But this is what
I wanted to shoot you with.
772
00:35:56,849 --> 00:35:59,419
I wanted some candid
shots to put up at the party.
773
00:36:02,028 --> 00:36:03,976
Julie coordinated everything,
774
00:36:04,000 --> 00:36:05,847
even the present.
775
00:36:05,871 --> 00:36:07,450
A gold choker.
776
00:36:07,474 --> 00:36:09,918
I just woke the lady
in the gift shop to get it.
777
00:36:12,254 --> 00:36:15,671
I was only trying to
measure your neck, silly.
778
00:36:15,695 --> 00:36:18,545
( playful theme playing )
779
00:36:18,569 --> 00:36:20,974
( laughing )
780
00:36:25,921 --> 00:36:27,501
Oh.
781
00:36:27,525 --> 00:36:29,394
Bert, it's beautiful.
782
00:36:31,936 --> 00:36:34,118
Captain, it's after
3 in the morning.
783
00:36:34,142 --> 00:36:35,621
( mouths indistinctly )
784
00:36:35,645 --> 00:36:37,660
He's on his way.
785
00:36:37,684 --> 00:36:40,935
ALL: ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
786
00:36:40,959 --> 00:36:45,279
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
787
00:36:45,303 --> 00:36:49,690
♪ Happy birthday, dear Denise ♪
788
00:36:49,714 --> 00:36:54,469
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
789
00:36:54,493 --> 00:36:56,608
Oh. Oh, wow.
790
00:36:56,632 --> 00:36:59,748
Oh, honey, that's fantastic.
791
00:36:59,772 --> 00:37:02,422
"Happy birthday,
Denise. A beautiful wife
792
00:37:02,446 --> 00:37:05,329
and dedicated... moth."
793
00:37:05,353 --> 00:37:06,733
Moth?!
794
00:37:06,757 --> 00:37:08,738
I ran out of strawberries.
795
00:37:08,762 --> 00:37:10,697
( upbeat theme playing )
796
00:37:20,023 --> 00:37:21,959
( upbeat theme playing )
797
00:37:35,795 --> 00:37:38,646
Gee, where do you suppose he is?
798
00:37:38,670 --> 00:37:40,717
Say, you don't think he
found us too boring, do you?
799
00:37:40,741 --> 00:37:42,556
Oh, Myra.
800
00:37:42,580 --> 00:37:44,394
Hey, everybody.
801
00:37:44,418 --> 00:37:45,529
Hi.
802
00:37:45,553 --> 00:37:47,066
Hi.
803
00:37:47,090 --> 00:37:48,604
Set yourself down.
804
00:37:48,628 --> 00:37:49,873
I'm sorry I'm late.
805
00:37:49,897 --> 00:37:52,814
Say, did you all hear
the news? No. What?
806
00:37:52,838 --> 00:37:53,951
Well, there was supposed to be
807
00:37:53,975 --> 00:37:56,524
an international
jewel thief on board,
808
00:37:56,548 --> 00:37:58,751
but the police found
him on another ship.
809
00:38:02,396 --> 00:38:03,942
Where did you hear that?
810
00:38:03,966 --> 00:38:05,446
One of the ship's
officers told me.
811
00:38:05,470 --> 00:38:07,484
I don't remember his name.
He's kind of a short fella,
812
00:38:07,508 --> 00:38:10,259
you know, with long
sideburns and frizzy hair.
813
00:38:10,283 --> 00:38:12,864
Why, you little fake, ya!
814
00:38:12,888 --> 00:38:16,440
Come on, Harvey. I
told you he was nobody.
815
00:38:16,464 --> 00:38:18,378
MR. TANNER: Well, wait a minute.
816
00:38:18,402 --> 00:38:21,954
Wh-what's the
matter? Uh, what...?
817
00:38:21,978 --> 00:38:24,548
Don't... Don't you wanna know
what I'm gonna have for dinner?
818
00:38:29,463 --> 00:38:31,399
( band playing
funky jazz music )
819
00:38:47,642 --> 00:38:49,121
There she is.
820
00:38:49,145 --> 00:38:51,160
Ladies and gentlemen.
Ladies and gentlemen.
821
00:38:51,184 --> 00:38:53,299
Miss Roxy Blue!
822
00:38:53,323 --> 00:38:55,225
( all applauding )
823
00:39:15,111 --> 00:39:16,190
( both laughing )
824
00:39:16,214 --> 00:39:17,859
Miss Blue, it's a
tremendous honor
825
00:39:17,883 --> 00:39:19,064
having you with us.
826
00:39:19,088 --> 00:39:21,302
Uh, we were afraid you
were going to deny us
827
00:39:21,326 --> 00:39:23,540
the pleasure of your
company for the entire voyage.
828
00:39:23,564 --> 00:39:26,013
Oh, well, I thought
so too for a while,
829
00:39:26,037 --> 00:39:28,653
but then I got to
feeling like a party.
830
00:39:28,677 --> 00:39:29,956
( both laugh )
831
00:39:29,980 --> 00:39:31,894
Could I have your autograph?
832
00:39:31,918 --> 00:39:33,633
Uh, i-it's for my niece. Uh...
833
00:39:33,657 --> 00:39:34,902
she'll be thrilled.
834
00:39:34,926 --> 00:39:36,874
Are you sure this isn't for you?
835
00:39:36,898 --> 00:39:38,211
( chuckles )
836
00:39:38,235 --> 00:39:39,981
That's all right. Just
tell the truth, sugar.
837
00:39:40,005 --> 00:39:42,169
Okay. Thank you, thank you.
838
00:39:44,484 --> 00:39:46,407
( band playing
smooth jazz music )
839
00:39:54,576 --> 00:39:55,821
( laughs )
840
00:39:55,845 --> 00:39:59,197
Ha-ha-ha-ha. You're funny.
841
00:39:59,221 --> 00:40:00,800
And Dean's another
one, you know.
842
00:40:00,824 --> 00:40:03,674
He's been making outrageous
suggestions for years.
843
00:40:03,698 --> 00:40:06,882
Ha, ha. But I tell 'em all,
and I'll tell you too, sugar,
844
00:40:06,906 --> 00:40:08,953
I'm not a girl who
falls for uniforms.
845
00:40:08,977 --> 00:40:11,995
I'm only faithful
to that one man.
846
00:40:12,019 --> 00:40:13,332
( chuckles )
847
00:40:13,356 --> 00:40:16,273
And that one, and that one.
848
00:40:16,297 --> 00:40:18,043
( both laughing )
849
00:40:18,067 --> 00:40:19,680
And that one over there.
850
00:40:19,704 --> 00:40:20,784
Hi, honey.
851
00:40:20,808 --> 00:40:23,190
Isaac, a refill for
Miss Blue, please.
852
00:40:23,214 --> 00:40:25,896
Yes, just don't stand
there, sweetheart.
853
00:40:25,920 --> 00:40:28,056
Roxy is thirsty.
854
00:40:32,737 --> 00:40:34,340
Thank you.
855
00:40:37,282 --> 00:40:39,230
Mm.
856
00:40:39,254 --> 00:40:41,768
Miss Blue, I wonder...
857
00:40:41,792 --> 00:40:44,243
Now, I know this
may be an imposition,
858
00:40:44,267 --> 00:40:47,851
but, uh, could you,
as a favor to me...
859
00:40:47,875 --> 00:40:50,513
What did you have
in mind, honey?
860
00:40:51,951 --> 00:40:53,699
Could you possibly sing a song?
861
00:40:53,723 --> 00:40:55,437
( laughing ): Oh.
862
00:40:55,461 --> 00:40:58,009
Well, I'll try.
863
00:40:58,033 --> 00:40:59,647
But you know, I'm
really not prepared.
864
00:40:59,671 --> 00:41:01,585
Ha-ha. I haven't
rehearsed anything,
865
00:41:01,609 --> 00:41:03,424
and we didn't bring
any arrangements
866
00:41:03,448 --> 00:41:04,760
or anything like that.
867
00:41:04,784 --> 00:41:06,832
Of course, it's very
sweet of you to ask.
868
00:41:06,856 --> 00:41:09,239
STUBING: Ladies and
gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen.
869
00:41:09,263 --> 00:41:13,482
Miss Roxy Blue will
now honor us with a song.
870
00:41:13,506 --> 00:41:16,154
( applause )
871
00:41:16,178 --> 00:41:18,817
( pianist playing Harold Arlen's
"Come Rain Or Come Shine" )
872
00:41:31,584 --> 00:41:35,559
♪ I'm gonna love you ♪
873
00:41:36,864 --> 00:41:39,480
♪ Like nobody's ♪
874
00:41:39,504 --> 00:41:42,956
♪ Ever loved you ♪
875
00:41:42,980 --> 00:41:46,631
♪ Come rain ♪
876
00:41:46,655 --> 00:41:50,072
♪ Or come shine ♪
877
00:41:50,096 --> 00:41:54,285
♪ High as a mountain ♪
878
00:41:54,309 --> 00:41:58,828
♪ Deep as a river ♪
879
00:41:58,852 --> 00:42:02,638
♪ Come rain ♪
880
00:42:02,662 --> 00:42:06,604
♪ Or come shine ♪
881
00:42:10,146 --> 00:42:14,301
♪ I guess when you met me ♪
882
00:42:14,325 --> 00:42:16,259
♪ Yeah ♪
883
00:42:17,933 --> 00:42:19,780
♪ It was just ♪
884
00:42:19,804 --> 00:42:22,287
♪ One of those ♪
885
00:42:22,312 --> 00:42:24,481
♪ Things ♪
886
00:42:26,153 --> 00:42:30,908
♪ Well, don't ever bet me ♪
887
00:42:30,932 --> 00:42:35,854
♪ 'Cause I'm gonna be true ♪
888
00:42:35,878 --> 00:42:38,383
♪ If you let me ♪
889
00:42:39,954 --> 00:42:41,602
♪ Ah-ha-ha ♪
890
00:42:41,626 --> 00:42:45,244
♪ You're gonna love me, yeah ♪
891
00:42:45,268 --> 00:42:50,692
♪ Just like nobody's loved me ♪
892
00:42:50,716 --> 00:42:52,797
♪ Come rain ♪
893
00:42:52,821 --> 00:42:54,802
♪ Come rain ♪
894
00:42:54,826 --> 00:42:57,375
♪ Or come shine ♪
895
00:42:57,399 --> 00:43:00,817
♪ Happy together ♪
896
00:43:00,841 --> 00:43:04,660
♪ Unhappy together ♪
897
00:43:04,684 --> 00:43:11,064
♪ Won't that be fine... ♪
898
00:43:12,403 --> 00:43:14,338
( upbeat theme playing )
899
00:43:19,521 --> 00:43:20,733
GOPHER: Bye-bye, now.
900
00:43:20,757 --> 00:43:22,800
Thank you. Bye.
901
00:43:24,867 --> 00:43:26,246
So long, Mr. Tanner.
902
00:43:26,270 --> 00:43:27,917
Uh, sir, one moment.
903
00:43:27,941 --> 00:43:30,189
Uh... Uh-huh.
904
00:43:30,213 --> 00:43:31,426
I just wanted to make sure
905
00:43:31,450 --> 00:43:33,397
you weren't stealing
any liver and onions.
906
00:43:33,422 --> 00:43:34,668
( laughs )
907
00:43:34,692 --> 00:43:36,338
Oh, listen, thanks
for everything.
908
00:43:36,362 --> 00:43:37,675
Thank you, thank you.
909
00:43:37,699 --> 00:43:39,647
I'm gonna tell all my
friends to take this cruise.
910
00:43:39,671 --> 00:43:41,619
Bye-bye.
911
00:43:41,643 --> 00:43:43,546
Bye.
912
00:43:47,857 --> 00:43:49,794
( quiet upbeat theme playing )
913
00:43:57,381 --> 00:44:00,666
You didn't come
to see me last night.
914
00:44:00,690 --> 00:44:04,342
I was too tuckered out from
serving all that champagne.
915
00:44:04,366 --> 00:44:06,681
Us help get that way sometime.
916
00:44:06,705 --> 00:44:07,916
Hm.
917
00:44:07,940 --> 00:44:10,491
You gonna invite me in?
918
00:44:10,515 --> 00:44:13,687
Why not? I hope you don't
mind a servant's quarters.
919
00:44:23,146 --> 00:44:26,698
Isaac, I tried to tell
you how things are.
920
00:44:26,722 --> 00:44:28,792
It was pretty rough, huh?
921
00:44:31,567 --> 00:44:32,880
( sighs )
922
00:44:32,904 --> 00:44:34,785
Well, we...
923
00:44:34,809 --> 00:44:37,323
We had a little
world all our own,
924
00:44:37,347 --> 00:44:41,433
but it didn't have
anything to do with reality.
925
00:44:41,457 --> 00:44:44,576
I just had to show you
who Roxy Blue really is.
926
00:44:44,600 --> 00:44:46,948
She's just a... A showpiece.
927
00:44:46,972 --> 00:44:48,385
She's a... An object.
928
00:44:48,409 --> 00:44:51,882
She's... She's a star.
929
00:44:52,754 --> 00:44:54,332
She's also a woman,
930
00:44:54,357 --> 00:44:56,439
and that's the part I thought
I was getting through to.
931
00:44:56,463 --> 00:44:58,911
Oh, you did.
932
00:44:58,935 --> 00:45:00,750
You got through.
933
00:45:00,774 --> 00:45:04,425
You got through to a part
of me that I even forgot.
934
00:45:04,449 --> 00:45:07,087
Why can't that
part belong to me?
935
00:45:08,860 --> 00:45:11,375
Maybe another
time, another place,
936
00:45:11,399 --> 00:45:14,115
but this isn't another time.
937
00:45:14,139 --> 00:45:15,820
This is now.
938
00:45:15,844 --> 00:45:17,345
Now stinks.
939
00:45:18,550 --> 00:45:23,071
Look, Isaac, you're
too much of a man
940
00:45:23,095 --> 00:45:26,212
to ever be a Mr. Roxy Blue.
941
00:45:26,236 --> 00:45:28,484
I was married to
three other guys
942
00:45:28,508 --> 00:45:29,888
who went through
an awful lot of pain
943
00:45:29,912 --> 00:45:32,663
because they couldn't handle it.
944
00:45:32,687 --> 00:45:34,299
And they had a lot
more going for them
945
00:45:34,323 --> 00:45:36,166
out there in this
world than you do.
946
00:45:40,706 --> 00:45:42,052
I'm sorry.
947
00:45:42,076 --> 00:45:44,693
I know it's cruel,
948
00:45:44,717 --> 00:45:47,353
but you've got to understand.
949
00:45:48,760 --> 00:45:51,676
Even if you don't understand,
950
00:45:51,700 --> 00:45:53,882
please forgive me.
951
00:45:53,906 --> 00:45:55,787
Forgive you?
952
00:45:55,811 --> 00:45:58,192
For what?
953
00:45:58,216 --> 00:45:59,651
We had a few laughs.
954
00:46:01,224 --> 00:46:03,460
Oh, we had more than that.
955
00:46:09,577 --> 00:46:12,049
We had a lot more than that.
956
00:46:22,945 --> 00:46:24,892
Julie. Ah.
957
00:46:24,916 --> 00:46:26,797
Julie, thank you
again for everything.
958
00:46:26,821 --> 00:46:28,468
Uh-huh. Oh,
especially my present.
959
00:46:28,492 --> 00:46:29,805
You have wonderful taste.
960
00:46:29,829 --> 00:46:32,143
Well, it was fun being
part of your birthday.
961
00:46:32,167 --> 00:46:34,717
Just count me out
next year, okay?
962
00:46:34,741 --> 00:46:35,886
( both laugh )
963
00:46:35,910 --> 00:46:37,157
Bye-bye. Bye.
964
00:46:37,181 --> 00:46:39,028
We still have a couple
of days' vacation left,
965
00:46:39,052 --> 00:46:41,400
so, what do you say
we fly to Las Vegas?
966
00:46:41,424 --> 00:46:43,404
Fly? In a... In a plane?
967
00:46:43,428 --> 00:46:44,542
Over the mountains?
968
00:46:44,566 --> 00:46:45,978
A-across the desert?
969
00:46:46,002 --> 00:46:48,183
Relax, Denise.
970
00:46:48,207 --> 00:46:49,922
Helen loved the flight.
971
00:46:49,946 --> 00:46:52,060
Hel... Helen?
972
00:46:52,084 --> 00:46:53,497
Who's Helen?
973
00:46:53,521 --> 00:46:55,423
Your mother, Denise.
974
00:46:56,763 --> 00:46:57,741
Oh.
975
00:46:57,765 --> 00:46:59,747
( chuckles )
976
00:46:59,771 --> 00:47:01,272
( both chuckle )
977
00:47:07,856 --> 00:47:09,070
My jewelry!
978
00:47:09,094 --> 00:47:10,639
My jewelry's been
stolen! Captain.
979
00:47:10,663 --> 00:47:12,946
I've been robbed!
Calm down, calm down.
980
00:47:12,970 --> 00:47:14,082
Now, are you sure?
981
00:47:14,106 --> 00:47:16,154
Maybe you misplaced it. No! No!
982
00:47:16,178 --> 00:47:17,891
It was there this morning
when I was packing.
983
00:47:17,915 --> 00:47:19,896
Wasn't it, Harvey? Yes.
Yes, it certainly was.
984
00:47:19,920 --> 00:47:21,389
Captain, captain.
985
00:47:22,125 --> 00:47:23,405
My jewelry case!
986
00:47:23,429 --> 00:47:25,177
A man down on the dock
asked me to return this.
987
00:47:25,201 --> 00:47:27,014
Well, you see? Someone found it.
988
00:47:27,038 --> 00:47:29,153
Honesty is still
the best policy.
989
00:47:29,177 --> 00:47:30,355
Wait.
990
00:47:30,379 --> 00:47:31,860
It's empty!
991
00:47:31,884 --> 00:47:34,165
What's this?
992
00:47:34,189 --> 00:47:36,504
MR. TANNER ( voice-over ):
Please forgive my dishonesty.
993
00:47:36,528 --> 00:47:39,011
I'm sorry I lied to you
at dinner last night.
994
00:47:39,035 --> 00:47:41,050
I told you I was gonna
have the roast beef,
995
00:47:41,074 --> 00:47:43,188
but at the last minute
I changed my mind
996
00:47:43,212 --> 00:47:45,293
and I ordered the
crabmeat au gratin.
997
00:47:45,317 --> 00:47:46,596
R.T.
998
00:47:46,620 --> 00:47:48,233
That's capital R, period,
999
00:47:48,257 --> 00:47:49,971
capital T, period.
1000
00:47:49,995 --> 00:47:53,180
"P.S., I figure
your jewels I took
1001
00:47:53,204 --> 00:47:56,387
"are worth $90,000.
1002
00:47:56,411 --> 00:47:59,049
"Don't let the insurance
company rob you.
1003
00:48:00,890 --> 00:48:04,864
"R.T., Roscoe Toler."
1004
00:48:17,631 --> 00:48:19,567
( upbeat theme playing )
1005
00:48:35,175 --> 00:48:37,156
Nice lady.
1006
00:48:37,180 --> 00:48:39,828
I got to talk to her
a little bit last night.
1007
00:48:39,852 --> 00:48:41,121
She's okay.
1008
00:48:43,195 --> 00:48:45,409
So you gonna see her again?
1009
00:48:45,433 --> 00:48:48,116
No, I doubt it.
1010
00:48:48,140 --> 00:48:49,753
She was getting
too serious, right?
1011
00:48:49,777 --> 00:48:52,728
Talking about
marriage and everything.
1012
00:48:52,752 --> 00:48:55,201
Yeah, well, you know, that
sort of thing is for chumps.
1013
00:48:55,225 --> 00:48:56,203
Yeah.
1014
00:48:56,227 --> 00:48:57,673
Besides, I'm saving myself
1015
00:48:57,697 --> 00:49:00,447
for somebody really terrific.
1016
00:49:00,472 --> 00:49:03,054
So you dumped her, right?
1017
00:49:03,078 --> 00:49:04,791
Yeah, you could say that.
1018
00:49:04,815 --> 00:49:07,365
( melancholy jazz
theme playing )
1019
00:49:07,389 --> 00:49:08,671
( car engine starts )
1020
00:49:29,443 --> 00:49:31,447
( upbeat theme playing )
70752
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