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1
00:00:45,834 --> 00:00:49,834
Ripped by Bornholm
2
00:02:01,835 --> 00:02:04,201
Andrew!
3
00:02:05,405 --> 00:02:07,396
Honey?
4
00:02:08,542 --> 00:02:11,477
- That was beautiful.
- Thanks, mom.
5
00:02:11,545 --> 00:02:14,480
Wash your hands.
Dinner'll be ready in 15 minutes.
6
00:02:14,548 --> 00:02:17,881
- I gotta finish my science project, mom.
- What's your project, son?
7
00:02:17,951 --> 00:02:21,580
To build a small but powerful
tv antenna...
8
00:02:21,655 --> 00:02:25,614
so i can pick up signals from real far away,
you know, like sacramento, oakland.
9
00:02:26,626 --> 00:02:28,560
Science is important,
but dinner's important too.
10
00:02:28,628 --> 00:02:30,425
Fifteen minutes.
Dinner.
11
00:03:21,414 --> 00:03:25,350
This has been a close game from the start,
as both teams need a victory tonight.
12
00:03:25,418 --> 00:03:28,979
These home fans really
show a lot of spirit.
13
00:03:29,055 --> 00:03:31,990
Idaho brings the ball down the court.
They drive toward the basket.
14
00:03:32,058 --> 00:03:35,323
They shoot-
no, it's off the rim! It's out!
15
00:03:35,395 --> 00:03:37,329
It's still Idaho leading, 38-32.
16
00:03:37,397 --> 00:03:39,262
Holy cow! I got Idaho!
17
00:03:39,332 --> 00:03:42,267
These fans are going wild!
18
00:03:46,840 --> 00:03:50,640
Aloha, aloha, aloha! It�s Kiahuna Pete!
19
00:03:54,414 --> 00:03:58,510
Yes, folks, if you can find a better deal
than right here at Kiahuna Pete�s,
20
00:03:58,585 --> 00:04:01,850
Hawaii?
I will personally eat a pineapple-
21
00:04:01,922 --> 00:04:04,322
yes, skin, leaves, the works!
22
00:04:04,391 --> 00:04:06,325
Oh, here�s a fixer-upper.
23
00:04:06,393 --> 00:04:09,829
Owned by a little old lady
from Pomona Valley-
24
00:04:31,585 --> 00:04:33,780
Dad!
25
00:04:33,853 --> 00:04:35,787
Dad! Come here, quick!
26
00:04:38,358 --> 00:04:40,292
Dad!
27
00:04:41,328 --> 00:04:43,262
Dad! Hurry up, hurry up!
28
00:04:43,330 --> 00:04:45,764
I got China, Dad!
I picked up China!
29
00:04:45,832 --> 00:04:49,097
- China? I think you mean Chinatown, son.
- No! Really! Look!
30
00:04:49,169 --> 00:04:53,105
I got Idaho, and then I got Hawaii,
and now China!
31
00:04:53,173 --> 00:04:56,700
My antenna works!
It really works! It looks like China.
32
00:05:08,622 --> 00:05:10,954
This�ll have to be-
33
00:05:11,024 --> 00:05:13,458
No. Okay,you know
Yeah, you have to-
34
00:05:13,526 --> 00:05:16,518
- No, you put that in after.
- All right.
35
00:05:17,664 --> 00:05:20,599
All right. Hey, be careful,
when you put that in. Not too much.
36
00:05:20,667 --> 00:05:23,602
Oh! Last night my antenna
got this really clear picture.
37
00:05:23,670 --> 00:05:26,605
Our antenna, Brain. You keep forgetting
this is a team project.
38
00:05:26,673 --> 00:05:28,607
Yeah, because
you two aren�t helping.
39
00:05:28,675 --> 00:05:31,610
But you kicked us out of your house last night.
Because you aren�t helping.
40
00:05:31,678 --> 00:05:34,613
Yeah, well, you think you�re helping
with this "I got China" stuff? I did!
41
00:05:34,681 --> 00:05:38,117
Pass the hydrochloric, please.
Yeah, yeah. We�re all probably gonna get three F�s.
42
00:05:38,184 --> 00:05:40,049
Hey, George,
this is the Brain talking.
43
00:05:40,120 --> 00:05:42,554
If he says he�s got it,
he�s got it.
44
00:05:42,622 --> 00:05:45,750
Look, if you want to you can come over tonight
and see for yourselves.
45
00:05:45,825 --> 00:05:47,759
Tonight?
Yeah.
46
00:05:47,827 --> 00:05:50,762
- I don�t know.
- Why not?
47
00:05:50,830 --> 00:05:54,823
Well, uh, I read the listings,
and there�s nothing good on in China.
48
00:05:55,902 --> 00:05:58,427
Whoa, whoa.
Uh-oh.
49
00:05:58,505 --> 00:06:02,100
Boy, look at that.
It�s amazing.
50
00:06:02,175 --> 00:06:05,303
Give me a break.
It worked yesterday.
51
00:06:05,378 --> 00:06:07,312
Here, let me help you.
52
00:06:07,380 --> 00:06:09,541
George! Hands off!.
Well, hey, it�s a team project!
53
00:06:09,616 --> 00:06:12,949
- Hey! Wait a minute! Freeze!
- What�s going on? What�s happening?
54
00:06:13,019 --> 00:06:15,453
Hey.! Watch it.!
Hey, freeze.
55
00:06:15,522 --> 00:06:17,217
Freeze.!
56
00:06:26,132 --> 00:06:28,066
What is it?
It�s not from China.
57
00:06:28,134 --> 00:06:29,999
It�s not from Earth.
58
00:06:31,071 --> 00:06:32,868
- Wow.
- What?
59
00:06:32,939 --> 00:06:34,873
You know what this is?
60
00:06:34,941 --> 00:06:37,136
It�s a signal from another planet.
61
00:06:38,545 --> 00:06:42,481
Who knows how strong this antenna is?
If it picked up China, why not?
62
00:06:42,549 --> 00:06:44,517
If he�s right,
we�ll all get A�s!
63
00:06:44,584 --> 00:06:49,180
The Way I figure it, the closest sun that can support,
a solar system like ours is ten light-years away.
64
00:06:49,255 --> 00:06:53,521
You mean, this signal was transmitted
from another planet,
65
00:06:53,593 --> 00:06:55,527
like, ten years ago?
66
00:06:55,595 --> 00:06:57,358
Exactly!
67
00:07:00,967 --> 00:07:02,901
Oh, Ricky!
68
00:07:02,969 --> 00:07:07,065
All right, Brain, this time you�ve gone too far.
Okay,Jimmy,you explain it.
69
00:07:07,140 --> 00:07:10,268
Do they look and talk like anything you�ve ever seen?
You have any idea What they�re doing?
70
00:07:10,343 --> 00:07:13,870
- Yeah, I think I do.
- What?
71
00:07:13,947 --> 00:07:17,576
Well, this is gonna sound crazy,
but I think they�re doing I Love Lucy.
72
00:07:17,650 --> 00:07:20,016
I Love Lucy?
You�re nuts!
73
00:07:20,086 --> 00:07:23,317
Yeah. Yeah, I�ve seen this episode
a million times.
74
00:07:23,389 --> 00:07:26,381
Now watch, here come the Mertzes.
Their furnace just blew up.
75
00:07:27,961 --> 00:07:31,192
Ohh!
76
00:07:31,264 --> 00:07:33,198
Is this possible?
77
00:07:33,266 --> 00:07:36,201
We�re getting their transmission
from 10 years ago.
78
00:07:36,269 --> 00:07:39,261
They must have gotten ours
from 20 or more.
79
00:07:44,210 --> 00:07:46,371
Listen. It�s the same song.
80
00:07:46,446 --> 00:07:48,380
I-I can�t believe this.
81
00:07:48,448 --> 00:07:51,076
W-We�re actually watching TV
from outer space.
82
00:07:51,151 --> 00:07:53,142
Got any nachos?
83
00:08:06,399 --> 00:08:09,334
Burns and Allen.
Six shoWs, six rip-offs.
84
00:08:09,402 --> 00:08:11,336
Why don�t they make up
their own shows?
85
00:08:11,404 --> 00:08:14,771
I don�t know.
Maybe it�s not a funny planet.
86
00:08:20,180 --> 00:08:22,114
Good night, Gracie.
87
00:08:22,182 --> 00:08:24,116
Hmm. Bye!
88
00:08:38,665 --> 00:08:40,599
Guys, come here.
89
00:08:49,576 --> 00:08:51,510
Hey, looks like astronauts.
90
00:08:51,578 --> 00:08:53,512
Yeah. Wonder
where they�re going.
91
00:08:53,580 --> 00:08:55,514
Hey!
That looks familiar.
92
00:08:55,582 --> 00:08:59,848
- It should,Jim. It�s Earth.
- Earth? We�re Earth.
93
00:09:01,788 --> 00:09:05,849
Hollywood.
94
00:09:05,925 --> 00:09:08,519
My God.
They�re coming here!
95
00:09:08,595 --> 00:09:11,325
Why?
I don�t know. Everybody comes here.
96
00:09:11,397 --> 00:09:15,390
Hollywood. Grauman�s Chinese Theater.
97
00:09:15,468 --> 00:09:17,402
Vine Street.
98
00:09:17,470 --> 00:09:21,372
Hey, these- these are
the old TV stars that they love:
99
00:09:21,441 --> 00:09:25,377
Lucy, Milton Berle,
100
00:09:25,445 --> 00:09:27,504
Jackie Gleason.
101
00:09:27,580 --> 00:09:29,912
Maybe they�re coming
to get their autographs.
102
00:09:29,983 --> 00:09:32,349
What are we gonna do?
103
00:09:32,418 --> 00:09:36,354
Nothing.
Hey, Jimmy, we got aliens coming to Hollywood.
104
00:09:36,422 --> 00:09:38,856
These signals
take 10 years to get here.
105
00:09:38,925 --> 00:09:41,860
This all happened 10 years ago.
Yeah, but they took off 10 years ago.
106
00:09:41,928 --> 00:09:44,362
I mean, when they land
is anyone�s guess.
107
00:09:44,430 --> 00:09:48,059
- You�d have to figure out where they�re coming from, how fast-
- No, no. no. Look.
108
00:09:48,134 --> 00:09:51,501
September 13, 1985.
109
00:09:51,571 --> 00:09:53,505
That�s tonight!
110
00:09:53,573 --> 00:09:55,564
They�re coming tonight.
111
00:10:01,648 --> 00:10:06,108
All right, look for people that look like
they�re from another planet.
112
00:10:06,185 --> 00:10:08,915
Everyone looks like
they�re from another planet.
113
00:10:19,465 --> 00:10:21,296
Maybe we can try-
114
00:10:21,367 --> 00:10:23,358
Excuse me.
No.
115
00:10:28,641 --> 00:10:31,804
What are we gonna do?
We�re never gonna find �em.
116
00:10:52,365 --> 00:10:54,299
It�s them.
117
00:10:54,367 --> 00:10:56,301
We found �em.
Can we go home now?
118
00:10:56,369 --> 00:10:58,894
Yeah.
119
00:11:00,673 --> 00:11:02,504
Don�t be afraid.
120
00:11:04,677 --> 00:11:07,339
We�re not gonna hurt you.
It�s okay.
121
00:11:15,455 --> 00:11:17,446
What�s that?
122
00:11:41,848 --> 00:11:43,782
Andy, play it back.
123
00:11:43,850 --> 00:11:46,944
What is it?
It�s an old TV signal. NBC.
124
00:11:57,430 --> 00:11:59,421
Wow.
125
00:12:08,041 --> 00:12:11,602
Temperatures are expected to reach
a high of 94 here-
126
00:12:11,677 --> 00:12:14,111
Okay, here we are.
127
00:12:14,180 --> 00:12:16,114
There we go.
128
00:12:16,182 --> 00:12:18,116
Okay, who gets the cheeseburger?
Me.
129
00:12:18,184 --> 00:12:20,118
Okay.
Who gets the hamburger?
130
00:12:20,186 --> 00:12:23,121
All right. For you.
This is well-done. Right?
131
00:12:23,189 --> 00:12:25,123
One for you too.
132
00:12:25,191 --> 00:12:27,125
Whoops.
Sorry about that.
133
00:12:27,193 --> 00:12:29,661
And I guess you get what�s left. Right?
Right.
134
00:12:29,729 --> 00:12:32,095
Here you are.
135
00:12:32,165 --> 00:12:34,759
Thank you very much.
136
00:12:40,006 --> 00:12:42,770
Mmm! Oh!
137
00:12:42,842 --> 00:12:44,833
No, no, no, no.
Like this.
138
00:12:46,412 --> 00:12:48,403
Ohh.!
139
00:12:55,488 --> 00:12:57,615
Good thing
we ordered the large.
140
00:13:04,063 --> 00:13:06,054
Ohh!
141
00:13:07,100 --> 00:13:09,796
Sugar on a hamburger?
142
00:13:09,869 --> 00:13:11,803
How gross.
143
00:13:11,871 --> 00:13:14,169
Ah.
144
00:13:35,328 --> 00:13:38,024
I think we�re gonna need
some more hamburgers.
145
00:13:38,097 --> 00:13:40,759
These guys look hungry enough
to eat a horse.
146
00:13:40,833 --> 00:13:43,666
Horse!
147
00:13:45,571 --> 00:13:47,766
- Horse.
- Horse?
148
00:13:47,840 --> 00:13:50,172
LittleJoe.
149
00:13:50,243 --> 00:13:52,143
LittleJoe?
150
00:13:52,211 --> 00:13:54,771
Hop Sing!
151
00:13:54,847 --> 00:13:56,576
Ponderosa!
152
00:13:56,649 --> 00:13:58,776
Ponderosa!
153
00:14:06,025 --> 00:14:09,085
Hop Sing!
154
00:14:25,611 --> 00:14:27,545
A real spaceship!
155
00:14:27,613 --> 00:14:31,310
R.F.D. Seven.
Stinkola moronica.
156
00:14:31,384 --> 00:14:34,979
Why don�t We pay for this
With this quick-drying melted rubber?
157
00:14:37,690 --> 00:14:40,056
Hup! Hup! Hup! Hup! Hup!
158
00:14:44,263 --> 00:14:47,061
Why, you- Come on!
Oh, don�t do that!
159
00:14:50,536 --> 00:14:52,470
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh!
160
00:14:52,538 --> 00:14:54,563
Oh, he broke it... I hope!
No, he didn�t.
161
00:14:54,640 --> 00:14:57,131
Oh! Why, you-
162
00:14:57,210 --> 00:14:59,144
Waa-waa-waa-waa-waa!
163
00:15:01,214 --> 00:15:04,308
Get outta here.!
Oh! Woo-woo-woo-woo-woo!
164
00:15:04,383 --> 00:15:07,546
Me Moe!
Me Moe!
165
00:15:09,188 --> 00:15:12,123
They must really trust us
to bring us here.
166
00:15:12,191 --> 00:15:14,455
We must really trust them
to come.
167
00:15:14,527 --> 00:15:17,087
Yeah. I can�t believe
we�re actually on a spaceship.
168
00:15:17,163 --> 00:15:19,597
Boy, what I wouldn�t give
for just one picture.
169
00:15:27,673 --> 00:15:29,664
Thanks.
170
00:15:34,513 --> 00:15:37,914
Movie star tour.!
Tour of the stars�homes.!
171
00:15:37,984 --> 00:15:39,975
Real movie stars.!
Live.!
172
00:15:40,052 --> 00:15:42,987
Why are we doing this?
They�re tourists. They�ll love it.
173
00:15:43,055 --> 00:15:45,990
Don�t worry. They�ll fit right in.
You wish.
174
00:15:46,058 --> 00:15:47,992
Step up, please.
Step up.
175
00:15:48,060 --> 00:15:50,995
Tickets, please. Tickets.
Thank you very much. Watch your step here.
176
00:15:51,063 --> 00:15:52,997
Tickets, please.
177
00:15:53,065 --> 00:15:54,999
Ralph Kramden!
178
00:15:57,069 --> 00:16:01,199
Thank you very much. Find a comfortable seat.
Enjoy the tour. Tickets, please.
179
00:16:02,375 --> 00:16:05,310
If you look out
the right side of the bus,
180
00:16:05,378 --> 00:16:10,281
You�ll see the home of America�s
number-one funny man, Mr. Morey Amsterdam.
181
00:16:10,349 --> 00:16:12,840
Yes, there�s
Morey Amsterdam�s home.
182
00:16:12,918 --> 00:16:14,909
Hey!
183
00:16:16,589 --> 00:16:18,580
Is that the new Polaroid?
184
00:16:20,559 --> 00:16:22,993
Could it be?
Well, I think it is.!
185
00:16:23,062 --> 00:16:28,432
Ladies and gentlemen, look out the left side of the bus.
It�s Uncle Miltie himself!.
186
00:16:28,501 --> 00:16:30,264
How about that?
187
00:16:32,171 --> 00:16:33,968
What�s going on?
Who�s that guy?
188
00:16:34,040 --> 00:16:37,601
It�s Milton Berle. He�s one of the biggest
comedy stars TV ever had.
189
00:16:37,677 --> 00:16:39,668
Uncle Miltie.!
190
00:16:39,745 --> 00:16:42,009
Bye-bye!
191
00:16:48,387 --> 00:16:52,346
Hi, Uncle Miltie.!
192
00:16:57,330 --> 00:16:59,321
I love you.
193
00:17:11,043 --> 00:17:14,979
There�s a sWitch.
Somebody stealing from Berle?
194
00:17:15,047 --> 00:17:18,847
They don�t mean to bother you, Mr. Berle.
They�re just real big fans of yours.
195
00:17:18,918 --> 00:17:20,818
What do they want?
Autographs?
196
00:17:29,395 --> 00:17:33,058
I do not understand
one word they said.
197
00:17:33,132 --> 00:17:34,895
Hey! Oh!
198
00:17:34,967 --> 00:17:37,993
Stop it-
Tell me, fellas, what do they want?
199
00:17:38,070 --> 00:17:39,935
It�s kinda hard to explain.
200
00:17:40,005 --> 00:17:43,202
Um, you see, they love
the TV shows that you used to make.
201
00:17:44,910 --> 00:17:50,041
- And now they want you to go
back with them to make some more.
202
00:17:51,183 --> 00:17:54,641
- What are they doing now?
- Negotiating.
203
00:17:54,720 --> 00:17:57,746
Negotiating. Oh.
204
00:17:57,823 --> 00:17:59,723
Well, thank you.
205
00:17:59,792 --> 00:18:02,522
Gave me a cigar.
206
00:18:02,595 --> 00:18:04,859
Thank you very, very much.
207
00:18:04,930 --> 00:18:06,921
You�re very cute.
208
00:18:10,669 --> 00:18:12,603
Uh-oh.
209
00:18:14,673 --> 00:18:18,609
That is the worst cigar I ever smoked.
Will you forget it. Forget it!
210
00:18:18,677 --> 00:18:21,669
I cannot work in a place
that doesn�t have a decent cigar.
211
00:18:24,650 --> 00:18:28,279
Guys? Guys, he said no.
212
00:18:28,354 --> 00:18:30,413
No.!
213
00:18:30,489 --> 00:18:34,755
- How are we gonna get them to understand?
- Leave it to me.
214
00:18:47,273 --> 00:18:49,207
Booked.
215
00:18:56,782 --> 00:18:58,716
Too busy.
216
00:18:58,784 --> 00:19:01,810
Ohh!
217
00:19:03,789 --> 00:19:05,723
I believe they understood me.
218
00:19:05,791 --> 00:19:08,624
We�ve gotta do something.
219
00:19:09,695 --> 00:19:11,629
They�re really depressed.
220
00:19:11,697 --> 00:19:13,631
Nobody Would go home With them.
221
00:19:13,699 --> 00:19:17,032
We never should have told them
Lucy and Desi split up.
222
00:19:17,102 --> 00:19:19,468
It�s gonna be a long trip home.
223
00:19:20,473 --> 00:19:22,703
I�ll get it.
224
00:19:27,246 --> 00:19:31,182
Wonderful! Come in!
All right, now don�t push. Take it easy.
225
00:19:31,250 --> 00:19:33,184
I get paid weekly.
226
00:19:33,252 --> 00:19:35,186
Very weakly.
227
00:19:35,254 --> 00:19:37,188
Look at it.
I love it!
228
00:19:37,256 --> 00:19:40,851
just like home! I told her her stockings Were Wrinkled.
She said she Wasn�t Wearing any stockings.!
229
00:19:40,926 --> 00:19:43,861
Who are these guys?
My mother was frightened by a porcupine! Ho-ho!
230
00:19:43,929 --> 00:19:45,863
Vaudevillians.
Where did you get �em?
231
00:19:45,931 --> 00:19:47,865
My grandfather�s
senior citizen club.
232
00:19:47,933 --> 00:19:50,697
They�re kinda old.
Nobody else was available!
233
00:19:50,769 --> 00:19:54,261
Besides, they�ve agreed
to go back home With them.
234
00:19:58,010 --> 00:20:03,676
Hi! I�m Professor Feathers, bringing you
sounds and songs of field and stream.
235
00:20:03,749 --> 00:20:07,014
The mallard drake.
236
00:20:07,086 --> 00:20:09,554
The Pacific eider duck.
237
00:20:09,622 --> 00:20:12,648
The blue-Winged teal.
238
00:20:12,725 --> 00:20:15,125
The California mockingbird.
239
00:20:17,429 --> 00:20:19,363
Now the typewriter.
240
00:20:22,501 --> 00:20:24,492
Ding!
241
00:20:27,473 --> 00:20:29,464
Ding.
242
00:20:40,486 --> 00:20:44,582
Ladies and gentlemen,
my new national anthem!
243
00:20:44,657 --> 00:20:47,057
Words and music by me!
244
00:20:49,361 --> 00:20:52,353
Rock it here, rock it there.
245
00:20:52,431 --> 00:20:55,127
Gonna rock it everywhere.
246
00:20:55,200 --> 00:20:58,067
Rollin� it here
Rollin� it there.
247
00:20:58,137 --> 00:21:00,503
Gonna roll it everywhere.
248
00:21:00,573 --> 00:21:03,440
Rock and roll
Rock and roll.
249
00:21:03,509 --> 00:21:06,376
Rock it, roll it
Rock and roll, whoo.
250
00:21:06,445 --> 00:21:09,005
Gonna rock it everywhere...
251
00:21:29,902 --> 00:21:31,836
My name is Jack Spoons,
252
00:21:31,904 --> 00:21:33,838
formerly with Billy Rose�s
Diamond Horseshoe.
253
00:21:33,906 --> 00:21:37,342
Take it away, my boy.
254
00:21:37,409 --> 00:21:41,743
Wow.!
255
00:21:55,728 --> 00:21:58,094
Wow.!
256
00:22:05,037 --> 00:22:06,800
Whoa.!
Wow.!
257
00:22:08,140 --> 00:22:10,131
WoW.!
258
00:22:54,420 --> 00:22:57,389
Thank you.
259
00:22:59,525 --> 00:23:01,959
Thank you.
Thank you.
260
00:23:02,027 --> 00:23:03,961
Take care.
Thank you.
261
00:23:04,029 --> 00:23:06,463
Thank you three boys and-
262
00:23:06,532 --> 00:23:08,466
Thank you very much.
263
00:23:08,534 --> 00:23:11,128
Let�s go, Jerry.
264
00:23:11,203 --> 00:23:13,137
You guys are funny.
265
00:23:13,205 --> 00:23:15,332
Thank you.
You�re welcome.
266
00:23:15,407 --> 00:23:17,773
Thank you.
267
00:23:22,848 --> 00:23:26,579
Those old vaudeville guys
sure are lucky. They really are.
268
00:23:26,652 --> 00:23:29,849
They�ll never believe us.
Who cares?
269
00:23:34,660 --> 00:23:37,094
Think they�ll ever
come back?
270
00:23:37,162 --> 00:23:39,096
They love our talent.
271
00:23:39,164 --> 00:23:41,724
Andrew.! No reason why they won�t,
come back and get more.
272
00:23:41,800 --> 00:23:43,734
What�s going on up there?
273
00:23:43,802 --> 00:23:45,827
- Hey, what you doin�?
- Practicing.
274
00:24:12,828 --> 00:24:15,828
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