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00:00:03,743 --> 00:00:05,818
sync & correction by f1nc0
~ Addic7ed.com ~
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00:00:05,944 --> 00:00:06,944
All right, Stan.
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00:00:06,995 --> 00:00:09,947
Another day,
another random body pain.
4
00:00:09,949 --> 00:00:12,916
Here we go.
5
00:00:12,951 --> 00:00:15,035
Uhh!
6
00:00:15,086 --> 00:00:17,788
Dear Stan, I needed
something to carry milk in,
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00:00:17,839 --> 00:00:20,707
so I used your slippers.
Love, Mabel.
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00:00:20,759 --> 00:00:21,842
Uhh!
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00:00:26,965 --> 00:00:28,132
Ahh.
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00:00:31,936 --> 00:00:35,806
Dear Stan, I took these to
build a planetarium suit for Soos.
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00:00:35,808 --> 00:00:37,775
Sorry! Dipper.
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00:00:37,809 --> 00:00:38,892
Uhh!
13
00:00:41,146 --> 00:00:42,946
Whoa, let's not take this line.
14
00:00:42,981 --> 00:00:44,815
- There's an old person in it.
- Pshht!
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00:00:44,866 --> 00:00:46,150
Yeah, he's probably gonna pay with,
16
00:00:46,201 --> 00:00:48,819
like, pennies and war bonds.
17
00:00:48,870 --> 00:00:52,039
Hey! For your information, I
was gonna shoplift most of this!
18
00:00:52,073 --> 00:00:54,158
Security!
19
00:00:54,209 --> 00:00:56,160
Hahh! Smoke bomb!
20
00:00:58,963 --> 00:01:00,747
Aw, seriously?
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00:01:03,802 --> 00:01:06,970
Ahh. Rough start to a day,
but it's all gonna be worth it
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00:01:07,005 --> 00:01:11,058
- when I fix that light bulb.
- And we're done.
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00:01:12,845 --> 00:01:14,094
Does everyone see this?
24
00:01:14,145 --> 00:01:16,763
This is what a hero
looks like right here.
25
00:01:16,815 --> 00:01:18,765
I thought we were out of light bulbs.
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00:01:18,817 --> 00:01:20,901
Oh, we were.
So I invented my own.
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00:01:20,935 --> 00:01:22,186
It will last a thousand years,
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00:01:22,188 --> 00:01:24,771
and the light it emits
makes your skin softer.
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00:01:24,823 --> 00:01:27,908
- Oh!
- Never have I known such softness.
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00:01:27,942 --> 00:01:29,026
Anyway, where were you?
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00:01:32,113 --> 00:01:35,165
Well, TV, at least you appreciate me.
Give me the good news.
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00:01:35,200 --> 00:01:38,085
This just in.
The mayor is dead.
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00:01:38,119 --> 00:01:40,754
- What?!
- Whoa! What's goin' on?
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00:01:40,788 --> 00:01:42,089
Raised by bears in the wilderness,
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00:01:42,123 --> 00:01:44,208
Mayor Eustace "Huckabone"
Befufftlefumpter
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00:01:44,210 --> 00:01:46,126
was best known for
raising the water tower,
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00:01:46,177 --> 00:01:48,045
possibly starting World War I,
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00:01:48,047 --> 00:01:50,214
and putting town menace
Gideon Gleeful behind bars...
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00:01:50,216 --> 00:01:53,217
in actual adult prison.
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00:01:53,219 --> 00:01:55,886
A memorial statue is
already being carved
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00:01:55,937 --> 00:01:58,138
in the deceased mayor's honor.
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00:02:00,225 --> 00:02:03,861
I'm sorry. It's just been so
long since we've had real news.
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00:02:03,895 --> 00:02:05,896
I'm just so happy!
44
00:02:05,947 --> 00:02:07,948
There will be a Town Hall
meeting this afternoon
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00:02:07,982 --> 00:02:09,733
to discuss replacing him.
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00:02:09,784 --> 00:02:10,817
New mayor, huh?
47
00:02:10,869 --> 00:02:13,871
Wonder who it could be...
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00:02:26,581 --> 00:02:29,089
2x14 - The Stanchurian Candidate
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00:02:31,599 --> 00:02:33,984
All right, order, order everyone!
50
00:02:34,035 --> 00:02:35,986
Calm down, now.
51
00:02:36,037 --> 00:02:39,823
We're here to choose a mayor for
the first time in almost a century.
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00:02:39,874 --> 00:02:42,918
According to the town
charter, a worthy candidate
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00:02:42,919 --> 00:02:45,963
is defined as anyone
who can cast a shadow,
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00:02:45,997 --> 00:02:49,382
count to ten, and throw their
hat into the provided ring.
55
00:02:51,169 --> 00:02:55,005
Well, now, I do believe I
fulfill all the requirements.
56
00:02:55,056 --> 00:02:57,140
- Wait. Bud Gleeful?
- He looks good,
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00:02:57,175 --> 00:03:00,927
- considering we threw his son in jail.
- That was a good day.
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00:03:00,979 --> 00:03:02,896
Now, folks, I know our family's had
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00:03:02,930 --> 00:03:04,931
its fair share of
whoopsie-daisies in the past,
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00:03:04,983 --> 00:03:07,934
but I'd like to make up for
it by formally announcing
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00:03:07,986 --> 00:03:10,854
my candidacy for the
Mayor of Gravity Falls!
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00:03:10,856 --> 00:03:12,022
Any questions?
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00:03:12,024 --> 00:03:15,826
Yes. Are you still in
contact with Little Gideon?
64
00:03:15,860 --> 00:03:17,194
That's a great question!
65
00:03:17,245 --> 00:03:19,946
I'm giving you fifty
percent off a used car.
66
00:03:19,998 --> 00:03:23,166
Fifty percent?
Fifty percent?!
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00:03:23,201 --> 00:03:27,788
In fact, everyone look under your seats.
You get half off a used car,
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00:03:27,839 --> 00:03:30,040
- you get half off a used car...
- Better than cash!
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00:03:30,042 --> 00:03:34,761
Wow! A colorful piece of paper!
He's got my vote.
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00:03:34,796 --> 00:03:38,015
Guys, I've got a really bad feeling
about Bud Gleeful as mayor.
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00:03:38,049 --> 00:03:39,883
I don't know, dude,
it's not like we have
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00:03:39,885 --> 00:03:41,802
a lot of good mayor options.
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00:03:41,853 --> 00:03:45,806
Everyone in this town is a tad strange,
except, ironically, Tad Strange.
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00:03:45,890 --> 00:03:49,109
Hi, guys. Tad's the name,
and being normal's my game.
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00:03:49,143 --> 00:03:51,978
- Loving you, Tad!
- And I love bread.
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00:03:52,030 --> 00:03:54,064
It's a shame Ford isn't here.
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00:03:54,115 --> 00:03:58,151
He'd run and win
and be a great mayor.
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00:03:58,202 --> 00:04:00,037
So, since everyone's happy,
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00:04:00,071 --> 00:04:03,240
I'll just take the oath of office now,
sound good? Gavel up.
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00:04:03,242 --> 00:04:05,742
Hold it right there, Bud!
81
00:04:05,793 --> 00:04:07,828
I'm taking you on!
82
00:04:07,879 --> 00:04:09,963
Stanford? No offense,
83
00:04:09,997 --> 00:04:12,049
but you're just some
two-bit carnival barker,
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00:04:12,083 --> 00:04:14,835
and your head is more ears than face!
85
00:04:14,886 --> 00:04:19,973
Oh, yeah? Well, your face
is more fat than... not fat!
86
00:04:21,259 --> 00:04:22,893
Oh, snap.
87
00:04:22,927 --> 00:04:25,896
What do you say, folks?
Are we just gonna let Bud win?
88
00:04:25,930 --> 00:04:29,015
- How about a real election?
- Get in there, hat!
89
00:04:32,070 --> 00:04:34,905
Well, looks like we got
some competition here, folks.
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00:04:34,939 --> 00:04:36,857
Which I'm fine with, totally fine with.
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00:04:36,908 --> 00:04:40,077
I was gonna let bygones
be bygones, Stan,
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00:04:40,111 --> 00:04:42,245
but you just made a powerful enemy.
93
00:04:42,280 --> 00:04:44,781
I'll win either way, and when I do,
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00:04:44,832 --> 00:04:48,221
you might not like the
Gravity Falls you wake up in.
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00:04:49,837 --> 00:04:53,957
Election! Election! Election!
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00:04:54,008 --> 00:04:58,011
- Hee hee hee hee!
- Let the madness begin!
97
00:05:00,882 --> 00:05:04,050
- Grunkle Stan, what are you doing?!
- Running for mayor.
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00:05:04,102 --> 00:05:05,969
Did I... Did I not make that clear?
99
00:05:05,971 --> 00:05:08,855
Grunkle Stan, it's not that
we think you can't do it,
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00:05:08,890 --> 00:05:10,140
it's just... No, no, it's okay, Mabel.
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00:05:10,191 --> 00:05:13,424
- We don't think you can do it.
- Look, kids,
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00:05:13,459 --> 00:05:15,729
the mayor kicking
the bucket got me thinking.
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00:05:15,780 --> 00:05:17,948
I'm an old man and I'm
not getting any younger.
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00:05:17,982 --> 00:05:20,509
My dumb brother's research
is probably gonna make
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00:05:20,510 --> 00:05:23,036
him famous, and what do I
have to show for my life?
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00:05:23,070 --> 00:05:25,822
Do I really want "crooked
grifter" on my tombstone?
107
00:05:25,824 --> 00:05:29,960
- How about "crooked mayor"?
- Psst. Mabel, let's talk.
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00:05:29,994 --> 00:05:31,962
I know Stan isn't the best candidate...
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00:05:31,996 --> 00:05:34,164
heck, he's committing
voter fraud right now...
110
00:05:35,967 --> 00:05:37,968
but Bud's definitely up to something,
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00:05:38,002 --> 00:05:39,803
and we're the only
ones who can stop him.
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00:05:39,837 --> 00:05:40,921
You're right, Dipper.
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00:05:40,972 --> 00:05:43,757
Besides, Stan has a kind of charisma.
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00:05:43,808 --> 00:05:45,892
How hard could getting him elected be?
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00:05:49,180 --> 00:05:53,984
- Spread the word, pig.
- All right, everybody, eyes up here.
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00:05:55,069 --> 00:05:58,021
Okay, Gravity Falls elections
are based on two events:
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00:05:58,072 --> 00:06:01,908
the Wednesday Stump Speech,
held on an actual stump,
118
00:06:01,943 --> 00:06:04,194
and the Friday Debate, wherein
townsfolk throw bird seed
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00:06:04,196 --> 00:06:06,079
at the candidate they like most.
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00:06:06,113 --> 00:06:08,949
At the end, they
release a Freedom Eagle,
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00:06:09,000 --> 00:06:11,001
who will fly to the
candidate covered in more seed
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00:06:11,035 --> 00:06:13,753
and bestow a birdly kiss upon him,
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00:06:13,788 --> 00:06:16,073
anointing him mayor.
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00:06:16,207 --> 00:06:18,792
I couldn't make this up
if I wanted to.
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00:06:18,843 --> 00:06:20,794
Okay, Grunkle Stan,
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00:06:20,845 --> 00:06:22,929
are you ready for your
first radio interview?
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00:06:22,964 --> 00:06:27,133
- I got my mouth, don't I?
- Okay, you're on with the candidate.
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00:06:27,185 --> 00:06:28,935
You're listening to Falls Radio,
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00:06:28,970 --> 00:06:31,104
24-hour news and bear rampage alerts.
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00:06:31,138 --> 00:06:34,057
And now, here's the-T Man!
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00:06:34,059 --> 00:06:37,727
Hello.
Candidate Stan, first question:
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00:06:37,778 --> 00:06:40,197
How do you feel about
the American flag?
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00:06:40,231 --> 00:06:44,117
Eh. I can take it or leave it.
Too many stripes. Next question?
134
00:06:44,151 --> 00:06:46,152
I don't know about that.
135
00:06:46,204 --> 00:06:49,739
What would you do to
help educate our kids?
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00:06:49,790 --> 00:06:52,909
Heh! Simple. Put 'em on an island
and make 'em fight for dominance.
137
00:06:52,960 --> 00:06:57,130
Also teach kids swears.
That'll bring 'em into the real world.
138
00:06:57,164 --> 00:07:00,217
What would you do about
the crime in Gravity Falls?
139
00:07:00,251 --> 00:07:02,752
Wait.
Do you mean crime in general,
140
00:07:02,803 --> 00:07:04,971
or just the specific
crimes committed by m...
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00:07:05,006 --> 00:07:07,757
Okay, interview's over.
142
00:07:07,808 --> 00:07:11,061
- Candy, what's the damage?
- Your approval rating started at zero.
143
00:07:11,095 --> 00:07:13,096
Now it's a number lower than zero.
144
00:07:13,098 --> 00:07:16,733
You're meme-ing fast,
and none of them are good.
145
00:07:16,767 --> 00:07:19,769
Look, Grunkle Stan, people
are like smell markers,
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00:07:19,771 --> 00:07:22,822
and you're black licorice.
It's not that you're unsniffable,
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00:07:22,857 --> 00:07:25,775
you just need to learn
when to keep the cap on.
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00:07:25,826 --> 00:07:29,162
From now on, maybe you should
just read our prepared remarks.
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00:07:29,196 --> 00:07:31,759
Sorry, kids.
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00:07:31,846 --> 00:07:34,075
I only say words
that come out of my brain.
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00:07:34,101 --> 00:07:36,627
If my head says,
"That lady's got an ugly baby,"
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00:07:36,628 --> 00:07:40,227
my mouth says, "Whoa, lady!
You got one ugly baby!"
153
00:07:41,413 --> 00:07:46,129
- And he's insisting on speaking his mind!
- So this is an emergency.
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00:07:46,180 --> 00:07:48,098
The Stump Speech is in a couple of days,
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00:07:48,132 --> 00:07:51,184
and if he continues like this,
we'll lose to Bud for sure.
156
00:07:51,218 --> 00:07:53,186
Hmm. It's a shame
there isn't some device
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00:07:53,220 --> 00:07:55,805
that would allow you
to control someone else.
158
00:07:55,856 --> 00:07:58,141
Oh, wait. Of course.
Yes. There is.
159
00:07:58,192 --> 00:08:01,945
A long time ago I designed a prototype
for Ronald Reagan's masters.
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00:08:01,979 --> 00:08:03,113
Just get Stan to wear this,
161
00:08:03,147 --> 00:08:05,982
and you can make him
a literal talking head.
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00:08:05,984 --> 00:08:08,702
Whoa! This is amazing!
163
00:08:08,736 --> 00:08:10,704
And ethically ambiguous!
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00:08:10,738 --> 00:08:12,155
As long as you wear the matching one,
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00:08:12,157 --> 00:08:14,708
he'll say and do
whatever you want him to.
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00:08:14,742 --> 00:08:15,825
Thank you, Great Uncle Ford!
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00:08:15,876 --> 00:08:18,971
Yes, yes.
Use it responsibly and all.
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00:08:20,958 --> 00:08:23,510
Whoa, thanks for the
slammin' tie, dudes.
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00:08:23,561 --> 00:08:25,679
These stripes are so slimming.
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00:08:25,730 --> 00:08:28,932
You really think this mind
control tie is gonna work?
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00:08:28,983 --> 00:08:30,767
Flip the switch and test it out.
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00:08:32,770 --> 00:08:33,854
Whoa!
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00:08:33,905 --> 00:08:36,573
♪ Oh oh oh, I'm a dancing dude ♪
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00:08:36,607 --> 00:08:39,743
♪ I got the fancy moves
and a bad attitude ♪
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00:08:39,777 --> 00:08:41,778
Ohh!
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00:08:41,829 --> 00:08:44,498
Ha! That's amazing!
177
00:08:44,532 --> 00:08:46,616
Guys!
Something weird just happened.
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00:08:46,667 --> 00:08:47,834
I'm really freaked out!
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00:08:47,869 --> 00:08:51,872
I am Soos-tron.
Watch me eat this pinecone.
180
00:08:51,923 --> 00:08:55,792
- Mind control is awesome!
- Oh, my gosh!
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00:08:55,843 --> 00:08:59,546
My life just flashed
before my eyes! Ohh!
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00:09:00,631 --> 00:09:02,716
Education? Git it!
183
00:09:02,767 --> 00:09:04,684
Prosperity? Git it!
184
00:09:04,719 --> 00:09:08,522
A Gravity Falls we can
be proud of? Git it!!!
185
00:09:10,641 --> 00:09:12,526
Do I really have to wear this thing?
186
00:09:12,560 --> 00:09:14,528
It looks like a flag threw up on me.
187
00:09:14,562 --> 00:09:16,813
Grunkle Stan, just trust your lucky tie.
188
00:09:16,815 --> 00:09:19,533
And now, Stanford Pines!
189
00:09:19,567 --> 00:09:21,818
You're on, Grunkle Stan!
190
00:09:21,820 --> 00:09:25,137
Okay, we'll only jump in
if he starts doing badly.
191
00:09:25,164 --> 00:09:28,554
Hiya there! Stan Pines here.
Let's get real.
192
00:09:28,589 --> 00:09:31,828
Do you think the women of Gravity
Falls wear too much makeup?
193
00:09:31,830 --> 00:09:33,797
Jump in! Jump in!
194
00:09:33,831 --> 00:09:38,635
Uhh! Uh, what I meant to say was,
you ladies all look great.
195
00:09:38,669 --> 00:09:40,504
And have you done
something with your hair?
196
00:09:40,555 --> 00:09:42,722
Girl, you are workin' it!
197
00:09:42,757 --> 00:09:46,676
That is exactly what I
needed to hear right now!
198
00:09:46,727 --> 00:09:48,728
- Whew!
- I'm Stan Pines.
199
00:09:48,763 --> 00:09:51,248
You may know me as that guy
who accidentally let all those
200
00:09:51,249 --> 00:09:54,523
bees loose in that elementary
school a few years back.
201
00:09:55,820 --> 00:09:58,738
But I believe in things.
America. Freedom.
202
00:09:58,773 --> 00:09:59,856
Ameri-Freedom.
203
00:09:59,907 --> 00:10:02,776
Good.
He's saying all the right things!
204
00:10:02,827 --> 00:10:05,862
Like my opponent pointed out,
I may not have a pretty face,
205
00:10:05,913 --> 00:10:07,914
but if you want a candidate
that will listen to you,
206
00:10:07,949 --> 00:10:11,701
well, I'm proud to be all ears.
207
00:10:13,004 --> 00:10:16,540
Now watch me break it down!
208
00:10:16,542 --> 00:10:18,708
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
209
00:10:20,545 --> 00:10:22,596
Uhh!
210
00:10:27,852 --> 00:10:30,554
Grunkle Stan, that was amazing!
211
00:10:30,605 --> 00:10:32,606
Yeah!
How'd you do it, Mr. Pines?
212
00:10:32,640 --> 00:10:33,723
Uh, I don't know.
213
00:10:33,774 --> 00:10:35,859
I just opened my mouth
and spoke from the heart.
214
00:10:35,893 --> 00:10:39,563
Or gut. Or something.
What is that sound?
215
00:10:39,565 --> 00:10:41,731
Why are people jamming
their hands together?
216
00:10:41,782 --> 00:10:45,819
It's applause!
Grunkle Stan, they love you!
217
00:10:45,870 --> 00:10:48,655
They... love me?
218
00:10:48,706 --> 00:10:50,991
Stan! Stan! Stan!
219
00:10:52,743 --> 00:10:55,745
There he is!
Mr. Pines, can we get a picture?
220
00:10:55,747 --> 00:10:57,914
Yes we Stan!
221
00:11:08,926 --> 00:11:10,727
Doggone it!
222
00:11:10,761 --> 00:11:12,979
Gosh heck huckleberry
honeysuckle darn it!
223
00:11:13,014 --> 00:11:14,931
Excuse my language.
I'm so sorry.
224
00:11:14,982 --> 00:11:17,601
Oh, this is bad. This is real bad.
225
00:11:17,652 --> 00:11:19,903
I need to speak with
my campaign manager.
226
00:11:19,937 --> 00:11:22,939
Please excuse me for a moment.
227
00:11:22,990 --> 00:11:25,775
Look, I'm sorry about all this.
228
00:11:25,777 --> 00:11:29,746
This is a minor setback, but we'll win,
I'm sure of it.
229
00:11:29,780 --> 00:11:31,781
Minor setback?
230
00:11:31,832 --> 00:11:33,783
Minor setback?!
231
00:11:33,834 --> 00:11:35,869
You listen, Daddy, and you listen good.
232
00:11:35,920 --> 00:11:37,003
Prison is a nightmare!
233
00:11:37,038 --> 00:11:39,589
I eat the same slop every day!
234
00:11:39,624 --> 00:11:41,758
They have no hair products in here!
235
00:11:41,792 --> 00:11:45,595
I can't sleep because my cellmate
took my pillow for a wife!
236
00:11:45,630 --> 00:11:47,714
You think I've been having fun in here?!
237
00:11:47,765 --> 00:11:51,601
- Hey, best friend!
- Don't be late for Friendship Bracelet class!
238
00:11:51,636 --> 00:11:54,804
I have fingerpainting at the same time!
239
00:11:54,855 --> 00:11:57,557
Ooh. The mayor dying's my
one ticket out of here,
240
00:11:57,608 --> 00:11:59,025
which is why you're
gonna win this election,
241
00:11:59,060 --> 00:12:01,778
pardon me out of prison, and
we're not gonna let the Pines
242
00:12:01,812 --> 00:12:03,947
get in my way again!
243
00:12:03,981 --> 00:12:05,732
But... But you don't understand.
244
00:12:05,783 --> 00:12:08,785
He's going great in the polls.
It's almost like magic.
245
00:12:08,819 --> 00:12:11,621
Magic, you say.
246
00:12:11,656 --> 00:12:14,658
Well, maybe it's time
we fight fire with fire.
247
00:12:14,660 --> 00:12:16,710
I been saving this for a long time,
248
00:12:16,744 --> 00:12:18,795
waiting for the right moment.
249
00:12:18,829 --> 00:12:22,832
Boy, now, we discussed this.
No more spooky spells.
250
00:12:22,834 --> 00:12:24,634
Well, Daddy,
251
00:12:24,669 --> 00:12:28,004
maybe you just need to
have more of an open mind.
252
00:12:28,006 --> 00:12:32,759
_
253
00:12:32,810 --> 00:12:35,595
No, boy, not that!
254
00:12:35,646 --> 00:12:37,597
Anything but that!
255
00:12:43,679 --> 00:12:45,345
- Ooh, it's him!
- Oh.
256
00:12:48,399 --> 00:12:50,400
Lookin' good, mayor candidate.
257
00:12:50,434 --> 00:12:53,069
Hooeey!
It's the guy I'm gonna vote for!
258
00:12:53,104 --> 00:12:56,022
Lookin' A-OK,
Stanford, A-OK.
259
00:12:56,073 --> 00:12:58,358
Tad, that means so much coming from you.
260
00:12:58,409 --> 00:13:00,193
Hey-O!
261
00:13:00,244 --> 00:13:02,162
Stan!
262
00:13:02,196 --> 00:13:03,947
Now just the ladies.
263
00:13:03,998 --> 00:13:05,031
Stan!
264
00:13:05,082 --> 00:13:07,951
- Now just the ladies my age.
- Stan!
265
00:13:08,002 --> 00:13:09,002
Woof! Never mind.
266
00:13:10,204 --> 00:13:15,258
- On the house, Mr. Big Shot.
- Now, this I could get used to.
267
00:13:15,292 --> 00:13:18,344
Grunkle Stan, what's with the outfit?
You're missing your lucky tie.
268
00:13:18,379 --> 00:13:21,297
- Power tie. Gotta wear it.
- Come on, have you seen the polls?
269
00:13:21,348 --> 00:13:23,967
I could debate naked and I'd still win.
270
00:13:23,969 --> 00:13:25,351
Huh. Come to think of it...
271
00:13:25,386 --> 00:13:28,448
Ha ha. Seriously, though,
we need you to wear
272
00:13:28,500 --> 00:13:32,025
- that suit and tie, Grunkle Stan
- Suit and tie. Gotta wear it.
273
00:13:32,059 --> 00:13:35,028
Uhh! Why do you kids have to
constantly tell me what to do?
274
00:13:35,062 --> 00:13:37,280
Everyone in this town is
finally showing me respect...
275
00:13:37,314 --> 00:13:39,232
and maybe you kids should, too.
276
00:13:39,283 --> 00:13:41,718
Grunkle Stan, we'd
respect you if you took
277
00:13:41,719 --> 00:13:44,154
- things more seriously.
- I am taking this seriously!
278
00:13:44,205 --> 00:13:45,371
If you haven't noticed,
279
00:13:45,406 --> 00:13:46,990
everything's that's come
out of this golden mouth
280
00:13:47,041 --> 00:13:49,242
has put us on top, with or
without your dumb advice!
281
00:13:49,293 --> 00:13:51,294
- Dumb advice?!
- Yeah!
282
00:13:51,328 --> 00:13:53,329
- Dumb advice.
- Dang it, Stan!
283
00:13:53,380 --> 00:13:56,299
Every one of those speeches
we were controlling you!
284
00:13:56,333 --> 00:13:58,168
- Dipper!
- What?!
285
00:13:58,170 --> 00:14:01,171
This tie is a mind control
device invented by Ford.
286
00:14:01,222 --> 00:14:03,923
If it wasn't for this tie,
you'd be losing!
287
00:14:05,746 --> 00:14:07,163
Well, you can tell
that know-it-all Ford
288
00:14:07,214 --> 00:14:10,717
that he can keep his fancy
light bulbs and magic ties.
289
00:14:10,751 --> 00:14:12,969
I'm gonna win this debate on
my own, without any of you!
290
00:14:13,004 --> 00:14:14,838
Stan, wait! You can't!
291
00:14:16,841 --> 00:14:18,058
Oh, this is bad.
292
00:14:18,092 --> 00:14:21,011
If we want to beat Bud, we
need another candidate, fast.
293
00:14:21,062 --> 00:14:24,814
What we need is a blank slate,
someone totally suggestible,
294
00:14:24,849 --> 00:14:27,851
an empty piece of clay
we can mold to our whims.
295
00:14:27,902 --> 00:14:29,019
Hey, a little help, dudes?
296
00:14:29,021 --> 00:14:31,071
I accidentally got my head
stuck in my shirt sleeve.
297
00:14:31,105 --> 00:14:33,900
I guess this is my life now.
298
00:14:35,993 --> 00:14:38,194
Seed here! Support
your favorite candidate
299
00:14:38,196 --> 00:14:40,947
by throwing election seed!
300
00:14:40,998 --> 00:14:43,975
Welcome, all, to the final
debate in what's sure to be,
301
00:14:43,976 --> 00:14:46,953
on a cosmic scale, a forgettable
blip in human history.
302
00:14:47,004 --> 00:14:50,040
And here come the three
more popular candidates!
303
00:14:50,091 --> 00:14:52,876
Oh! Hello there, Stanford.
304
00:14:52,927 --> 00:14:56,129
Long time no see.
Hee hee. Whoo-hoo-hoo!
305
00:14:56,180 --> 00:14:59,215
Don't you "tee-hee" me.
I'll debate you into the ground!
306
00:14:59,266 --> 00:15:03,853
Oh, but I have a widdle
twick up my sweevie-weeves.
307
00:15:03,888 --> 00:15:06,723
You're making me very
uncomfortable right now.
308
00:15:06,725 --> 00:15:08,058
But what's this?
309
00:15:08,060 --> 00:15:10,894
One new candidate has entered the race!
310
00:15:10,945 --> 00:15:12,729
Wait a minute. What?!
311
00:15:15,149 --> 00:15:19,819
- Those backstabbing...
- Let the debate begin!
312
00:15:19,870 --> 00:15:23,206
First question:
What's your position on axes?
313
00:15:23,240 --> 00:15:25,992
Wait. I mean... taxes.
314
00:15:26,043 --> 00:15:29,913
Easy. Taxes are the worst.
I propose we stimulate the economy
315
00:15:29,915 --> 00:15:34,751
by waging wars on neighboring cities.
We have the cannons.
316
00:15:34,753 --> 00:15:36,886
Boo!
317
00:15:36,921 --> 00:15:38,171
What? Uh...
318
00:15:38,222 --> 00:15:40,090
I don't know much about taxes,
319
00:15:40,141 --> 00:15:42,976
but I can promise you
a kitten in every pot.
320
00:15:43,010 --> 00:15:44,144
That doesn't make sense, Mabel.
321
00:15:44,178 --> 00:15:47,147
You don't make sense, Dipper!
322
00:15:47,181 --> 00:15:51,067
Fwends. Fwends. Can't you see
what's happening on this stage?
323
00:15:51,102 --> 00:15:53,937
These politicians are
dancing around the issues.
324
00:15:53,988 --> 00:15:58,241
Well, I can sing round the issues!
325
00:15:58,275 --> 00:16:01,244
♪ Crime is bad,
crime is so, so bad ♪
326
00:16:01,278 --> 00:16:03,747
♪ Vote for Bud and it
ain't gonna be no crime ♪
327
00:16:03,781 --> 00:16:05,115
♪ Crime's bad.
Vote for Bud ♪
328
00:16:06,951 --> 00:16:09,002
You may now throw your birdseed.
329
00:16:11,205 --> 00:16:13,923
And now a quick intermission.
330
00:16:13,958 --> 00:16:15,759
We're getting eaten alive back there.
331
00:16:15,793 --> 00:16:18,845
Since when has Bud
been creepily adorable?
332
00:16:18,879 --> 00:16:21,181
I don't know!
It doesn't make sense!
333
00:16:21,215 --> 00:16:24,134
He's almost acting just like... like...
334
00:16:24,185 --> 00:16:27,971
Widdle old me.
335
00:16:28,806 --> 00:16:31,808
Aha! Hello there!
Long time no see.
336
00:16:31,810 --> 00:16:35,028
Except in my revenge fantasies
where I see you on an hourly basis.
337
00:16:35,062 --> 00:16:37,897
Gideon! I knew you were
somehow behind this!
338
00:16:37,948 --> 00:16:39,115
You've been controlling Bud!
339
00:16:39,150 --> 00:16:41,868
And it seems you've been
controlling Stanford!
340
00:16:41,902 --> 00:16:43,153
I have to hand it to both y'all.
341
00:16:43,155 --> 00:16:46,039
You've gotten much eviler
since I last saw ya.
342
00:16:46,073 --> 00:16:47,157
Daddy.
343
00:16:50,161 --> 00:16:52,745
Let go of us!
344
00:16:58,135 --> 00:17:01,805
Behold your grand view of the debate!
345
00:17:01,839 --> 00:17:05,925
Once I win this election,
I'll finally rule this backwoods town!
346
00:17:05,976 --> 00:17:08,928
You'll never get away with
this, you creepy little dork!
347
00:17:08,979 --> 00:17:12,849
Oh, I'd be happy to spare you,
Mabel... if you agree to be mine.
348
00:17:12,851 --> 00:17:15,768
I even made you this wedding
dress in crafts class.
349
00:17:15,820 --> 00:17:17,187
Don't ask what it's made of.
350
00:17:17,189 --> 00:17:19,856
Ew! I'd rather die, you creep!
351
00:17:19,858 --> 00:17:22,992
Fine! Have it your way.
Once I win,
352
00:17:23,027 --> 00:17:25,028
they'll hit the plunger
for the fireworks display,
353
00:17:25,030 --> 00:17:28,865
finishing the mountain's
construction, trapping you all inside.
354
00:17:28,867 --> 00:17:30,867
I've been trapped behind
concrete all summer...
355
00:17:30,918 --> 00:17:33,002
now see how you like it!
356
00:17:33,037 --> 00:17:36,206
Say hello to the next
Mayor of Gravity Falls, kids!
357
00:17:39,043 --> 00:17:40,877
And that is why, um,
358
00:17:40,879 --> 00:17:43,129
the Statue of Liberty
is our hottest landmark.
359
00:17:43,180 --> 00:17:44,881
Boo!!!
360
00:17:44,883 --> 00:17:46,966
Awright, I lied.
She's kind of mannish.
361
00:17:47,017 --> 00:17:48,637
What do you want from me?
362
00:17:51,805 --> 00:17:54,941
Ahh. You're dying out there, Stan.
363
00:17:56,060 --> 00:17:58,111
Kids, you were right all along.
364
00:17:58,145 --> 00:18:00,146
I shoulda listened to
you when I had the chance.
365
00:18:00,197 --> 00:18:02,899
- Help! Help us!
- What the...?!
366
00:18:02,901 --> 00:18:04,784
We're tied to a bunch of fireworks!
367
00:18:12,910 --> 00:18:13,910
Kids!
368
00:18:16,163 --> 00:18:19,132
Listen, everybody,
this debate is over.
369
00:18:19,166 --> 00:18:21,050
I gotta go save my family!
370
00:18:21,085 --> 00:18:23,920
No, those... those are just
some demolition dummies.
371
00:18:23,922 --> 00:18:27,056
- Nothin' to see here.
- Can it, Gleeful!
372
00:18:27,091 --> 00:18:28,808
Heeyahhh!
373
00:18:28,842 --> 00:18:30,810
In a shocking turn of events,
374
00:18:30,844 --> 00:18:33,096
Stan Pines has run to
the aid of two children
375
00:18:33,147 --> 00:18:35,815
who appear to be in danger.
376
00:18:35,849 --> 00:18:37,984
And the crowd is loving it!
377
00:18:38,018 --> 00:18:40,987
No! Stop it!
Thank you, but stop it!
378
00:18:41,021 --> 00:18:43,072
Get back, you terror birds!
379
00:18:53,951 --> 00:18:55,835
Grunkle Stan!
380
00:18:55,869 --> 00:18:58,922
Kids! Look, I'm sorry
I was being stubborn.
381
00:18:58,956 --> 00:19:00,907
I guess being the town's
hero wasn't enough...
382
00:19:00,908 --> 00:19:03,941
- I wanted to be yours, too.
- We're sorry, Grunkle Stan.
383
00:19:03,976 --> 00:19:05,962
We should have supported
you, win or lose.
384
00:19:05,964 --> 00:19:09,688
- Probably lose.
- I can still drop you, you know.
385
00:19:16,190 --> 00:19:20,143
No, no, no, no,
no, no, no, not again!
386
00:19:20,145 --> 00:19:23,029
Time to take care of
you once and for all!
387
00:19:23,063 --> 00:19:25,064
Oh no!
We have to get out of here!
388
00:19:25,115 --> 00:19:30,526
Kids, if I die, make sure I get
a bigger tombstone than Ford.
389
00:19:43,968 --> 00:19:45,835
No! No!
390
00:20:07,992 --> 00:20:13,029
Mayor Pines!
Mayor Pines! Mayor Pines!
391
00:20:13,031 --> 00:20:15,865
Well, I gues we know who won.
392
00:20:15,867 --> 00:20:19,202
This just in: Stanford Pines loses.
393
00:20:19,253 --> 00:20:20,787
What?!
394
00:20:20,838 --> 00:20:23,122
Despite winning an
overwhelming 95% of the vote,
395
00:20:23,173 --> 00:20:25,758
election officials had to disqualify him
396
00:20:25,793 --> 00:20:27,960
due to discovery of an
extensive criminal record.
397
00:20:28,012 --> 00:20:29,045
Oh boy.
398
00:20:29,096 --> 00:20:32,131
- Stan, what did you do?
- What didn't I do?
399
00:20:32,182 --> 00:20:35,134
Crimes include shoplifting,
teaching bears to drive,
400
00:20:35,185 --> 00:20:38,221
a new crime he invented
called "burgle-bezzlement,"
401
00:20:38,272 --> 00:20:40,773
first-degree llamacide...
402
00:20:40,808 --> 00:20:42,225
That llama knew too much.
403
00:20:42,227 --> 00:20:43,943
Due to this shocking development,
404
00:20:43,977 --> 00:20:46,062
it would appear the mayorship passes to
405
00:20:46,064 --> 00:20:48,898
the only candidate who actually
filled our their paperwork,
406
00:20:48,949 --> 00:20:52,368
local enthusiasm
enthusiast Tyler Cutebiker.
407
00:20:55,873 --> 00:20:57,156
Got it.
408
00:20:57,207 --> 00:20:59,075
We will dedicate the
rest of this broadcast
409
00:20:59,077 --> 00:21:01,077
to listing Stan's crimes.
410
00:21:01,079 --> 00:21:04,831
First-degree thermometer
theft, pug trafficking...
411
00:21:04,882 --> 00:21:06,916
Whoo! At least they didn't
list any of the bad ones.
412
00:21:06,967 --> 00:21:09,168
On an unrelated topic, I
have a lot of cheap pugs,
413
00:21:09,219 --> 00:21:12,889
- and I need to move them fast.
- I'm sorry, Stan.
414
00:21:12,923 --> 00:21:15,058
I actually think you as
mayor would have been fun.
415
00:21:15,092 --> 00:21:18,227
Ah. Maybe it's for the best.
I got close the dream, though, kids.
416
00:21:18,262 --> 00:21:23,711
Hey, I knit you something.
It's not official, but I think it fits.
417
00:21:26,186 --> 00:21:28,071
Grunkle Stan, are you crying?
418
00:21:28,105 --> 00:21:30,773
I got campaign confetti in my eyes.
419
00:21:30,775 --> 00:21:33,159
Come on, kids, want to go
vandalize Mayor Tyler's mansion?
420
00:21:33,193 --> 00:21:36,112
- Hey hey! Vandalism!
- Yay!!!
421
00:21:36,114 --> 00:21:39,999
I'm sorry the election thing
didn't work out for you, bro.
422
00:21:40,033 --> 00:21:43,119
If it makes you feel any better,
we're gonna throw a riot tonight.
423
00:21:43,121 --> 00:21:45,955
Does someone want to throw a riot?
424
00:21:45,957 --> 00:21:48,547
Thanks, Ghost Eyes,
I'm just not in the mood.
425
00:21:50,763 --> 00:21:54,215
This poster is the only
thing keeping me going.
426
00:21:58,597 --> 00:22:02,025
I'm finally ready to make a deal.
427
00:22:03,288 --> 00:22:06,526
sync & correction by f1nc0
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