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1
00:00:05,804 --> 00:00:07,723
[birds chirping]
2
00:00:11,977 --> 00:00:16,274
PHIL: I was thinking about how doctors
in the Middle Ages used to bleed people.
3
00:00:16,815 --> 00:00:18,109
{\an8}You know, they thought by...
4
00:00:18,693 --> 00:00:21,612
{\an8}cutting the patient
and letting them bleed, that they could...
5
00:00:21,695 --> 00:00:23,781
{\an8}pull the sickness out of them.
6
00:00:23,864 --> 00:00:28,077
{\an8}And I think in a way,
that was what I was trying to do.
7
00:00:29,412 --> 00:00:30,829
{\an8}When I made that first cut...
8
00:00:31,789 --> 00:00:35,876
{\an8}I could almost feel the wrong being...
9
00:00:36,753 --> 00:00:37,920
{\an8}sucked out of me,
10
00:00:39,130 --> 00:00:41,132
{\an8}and I actually felt high.
11
00:00:43,676 --> 00:00:46,262
[inhaling heavily] Its appeal must be
difficult to resist, Phil,
12
00:00:46,345 --> 00:00:48,765
but we know it's just like
any other drug, right?
13
00:00:49,181 --> 00:00:50,767
We've been chasing it for years now
14
00:00:50,849 --> 00:00:53,352
but the high's never been the same
nor the relief.
15
00:00:53,645 --> 00:00:55,647
- Yeah, that's true.
- DR. M: It's your time, Phil.
16
00:00:56,439 --> 00:00:58,190
Anything else you would like to share?
17
00:00:59,651 --> 00:01:00,943
[sniffles]
18
00:01:01,360 --> 00:01:02,320
I'm good.
19
00:01:02,403 --> 00:01:04,280
You cut yourself for fun,
I wouldn't say you are good, dude.
20
00:01:04,363 --> 00:01:05,948
Leave him alone.
21
00:01:07,074 --> 00:01:09,034
- Does she tie your shoes, too, Phil?
- DR. M: Chad.
22
00:01:09,410 --> 00:01:11,871
We're a non-confrontational
therapeutic group.
23
00:01:11,954 --> 00:01:14,290
Treat others as
you yourself want to be treated.
24
00:01:14,374 --> 00:01:15,249
OK.
25
00:01:15,375 --> 00:01:18,795
JANE: Diarrhea of the mouth
is a real sickness, huh, Chad?
26
00:01:18,878 --> 00:01:20,921
DR. M: All right, enough.
Enough, every one.
27
00:01:21,214 --> 00:01:23,633
Jane, I don't want you to handle that now.
28
00:01:24,634 --> 00:01:27,595
Well, I can't think of anything positive
to say right now.
29
00:01:27,679 --> 00:01:30,431
Come on, you've been
such a strong presence here, anything.
30
00:01:34,769 --> 00:01:35,687
OK.
31
00:01:38,189 --> 00:01:39,399
I'm a planner.
32
00:01:40,608 --> 00:01:43,944
And if I can't see what's ahead of me,
I lose my shit, which is...
33
00:01:44,904 --> 00:01:46,280
probably why I'm in here.
34
00:01:47,907 --> 00:01:51,411
Life is impossible to plan,
so I'm constantly losing my shit.
35
00:01:54,121 --> 00:01:57,291
I come from a family of... of suicides.
36
00:01:58,501 --> 00:02:00,754
My grandmother, my father...
37
00:02:02,129 --> 00:02:03,172
and now me.
38
00:02:05,132 --> 00:02:08,469
But you don't need to know any of that.
What you need to know is...
39
00:02:09,387 --> 00:02:13,600
when I get on that plane tonight,
I will never arrive home.
40
00:02:15,351 --> 00:02:16,603
My body will but...
41
00:02:17,395 --> 00:02:22,233
the airy part of me,
my soul, if you must, will not.
42
00:02:25,236 --> 00:02:28,573
When the lights go down
and everyone nods off to sleep,
43
00:02:28,656 --> 00:02:30,908
I will unbuckle my seatbelt,
44
00:02:32,285 --> 00:02:34,287
make my way to the lavatory,
45
00:02:35,538 --> 00:02:37,415
take a handful of oblivion
46
00:02:38,291 --> 00:02:41,502
and just sleep forever.
47
00:02:42,336 --> 00:02:43,212
DR. M: Jane?
48
00:02:43,504 --> 00:02:44,380
[thud]
49
00:02:45,715 --> 00:02:48,551
Is everything OK?
If you wanna say something? Last chance.
50
00:02:52,722 --> 00:02:53,807
Yeah...
51
00:02:55,266 --> 00:02:56,142
Um...
52
00:02:57,769 --> 00:02:58,728
[scoffs lightly]
53
00:02:59,103 --> 00:03:00,647
I'm gonna miss your faces.
54
00:03:02,565 --> 00:03:05,109
They saved me, more than once.
55
00:03:06,152 --> 00:03:09,656
And for that, I'm forever grateful but...
56
00:03:10,740 --> 00:03:12,533
I don't wanna ever be here again.
57
00:03:13,868 --> 00:03:17,037
And that's not to say that I don't want
to see any of you guys again, I just...
58
00:03:19,290 --> 00:03:20,667
not here.
59
00:03:26,798 --> 00:03:28,257
- Get a room, ladies.
- GIRL: Shut up!
60
00:03:28,341 --> 00:03:29,258
Chad...
61
00:03:29,509 --> 00:03:31,135
[speaking indistinctly]
62
00:03:35,807 --> 00:03:40,102
No, no, no, I'll be there, OK?
It's far too late.
63
00:03:40,186 --> 00:03:43,230
Mom, please don't pick me up.
I'll just take an Uber.
64
00:03:43,314 --> 00:03:45,650
WOMAN: Jane,
just don't argue with me, OK?
65
00:03:45,733 --> 00:03:48,444
I'll be there. It's New York.
It's not safe that late at night.
66
00:03:48,903 --> 00:03:51,405
I have a great day planned for us
in New York.
67
00:03:51,489 --> 00:03:54,575
We'll go to that chocolate shop,
you remember that? Serendipity?
68
00:03:54,951 --> 00:03:56,870
Frozen hot chocolate with your dad?
69
00:03:59,121 --> 00:03:59,956
Jane?
70
00:04:04,335 --> 00:04:05,461
I know, it's...
71
00:04:06,838 --> 00:04:08,172
It's my fault, Mom.
72
00:04:09,215 --> 00:04:12,259
You're just being good to me,
you've always just been good to me,
73
00:04:12,343 --> 00:04:16,472
I'm just so... I'm... useless,
I'm so fucking useless.
74
00:04:16,556 --> 00:04:20,810
- Jane, look, please, just... It's OK.
- Look, Mom, I gotta go.
75
00:04:21,227 --> 00:04:24,438
- WOMAN: Please don't go.- OK, but, I, I love you.
76
00:04:25,189 --> 00:04:26,566
Always remember that.
77
00:04:27,734 --> 00:04:30,862
["Smother" sung by Daughter]
♪ I should go now quietly ♪
78
00:04:31,445 --> 00:04:36,116
I looked in my mother's eyes this morning
knowing that what I was about to do to her
79
00:04:36,200 --> 00:04:39,078
would be so much worse
than what he did to me.
80
00:04:41,247 --> 00:04:44,417
I thought my father
a narcissist for leaving me.
81
00:04:45,418 --> 00:04:47,879
But this girl I see before me,
82
00:04:49,463 --> 00:04:51,007
she understands him.
83
00:04:52,884 --> 00:04:57,513
And yet it's the pain I feel now
is what he felt.
84
00:04:57,764 --> 00:05:01,100
♪ ...Meet my creators ♪
85
00:05:03,770 --> 00:05:04,979
I have to forgive him.
86
00:05:06,773 --> 00:05:11,611
♪ ...That I'm a suffocator ♪
87
00:05:12,194 --> 00:05:15,949
♪ ...Suffocator ♪
88
00:05:16,156 --> 00:05:19,911
♪ ...Suffocator ♪
89
00:05:20,077 --> 00:05:23,039
♪ ...Suffocator ♪
90
00:05:32,381 --> 00:05:33,215
[Dr. M speaking indistinctly]
91
00:05:34,258 --> 00:05:36,678
Deep breaths, what's up? What's going on?
92
00:05:37,512 --> 00:05:41,057
MAN: Ladies and gentlemen
flight 270 to Albuquerque, New Mexico...
93
00:05:41,223 --> 00:05:44,352
[cell phone ringing]
94
00:05:44,644 --> 00:05:46,938
WOMAN:
Let's keep the line moving people.
95
00:05:48,439 --> 00:05:50,274
[indistinct chatter]
96
00:05:50,441 --> 00:05:52,443
[scanner beeping]
97
00:05:53,110 --> 00:05:54,403
MAN: I've got it.
98
00:05:55,446 --> 00:05:59,617
- Looks like our CrossFit's paying off.
- ...Stop it!
99
00:05:59,784 --> 00:06:01,243
Oh, he's embarrassed!
100
00:06:02,328 --> 00:06:04,455
I'm sorry, we just got engaged.
101
00:06:06,165 --> 00:06:08,167
- Oh, it's beautiful.
- Oh, thank you.
102
00:06:08,250 --> 00:06:10,920
It was at his mom's, but I had it reset
103
00:06:11,170 --> 00:06:12,463
[whispers] ...with a much bigger stone.
104
00:06:12,630 --> 00:06:14,966
[scanner beeping]
105
00:06:15,800 --> 00:06:17,259
Something in your pockets?
106
00:06:17,719 --> 00:06:19,428
Your belt buckle?
No, it's the jacket.
107
00:06:19,595 --> 00:06:23,558
We're getting married on a mountain top
on New Year's Eve.
108
00:06:23,725 --> 00:06:24,767
[indistinct chatter]
109
00:06:24,976 --> 00:06:26,061
That sound's nice.
110
00:06:26,895 --> 00:06:28,437
MAN: There's so many zippers
on this thing.
111
00:06:29,438 --> 00:06:31,357
[scanner beeping]
112
00:06:32,984 --> 00:06:34,944
Wow, I don't know what else...
113
00:06:37,989 --> 00:06:39,032
Do we have a problem, miss?
114
00:06:39,323 --> 00:06:42,911
- Um... my flight is boarding.
- Let me see your boarding pass, please.
115
00:06:44,412 --> 00:06:45,580
It says 5:00 PM here.
116
00:06:46,706 --> 00:06:48,917
You have plenty of time.
Please wait in the line.
117
00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:51,335
- I can't.
- MAN: What do you mean you can't?
118
00:06:51,878 --> 00:06:54,130
[indistinct chatter]
119
00:06:54,463 --> 00:06:55,381
Miss?
120
00:06:56,925 --> 00:06:59,552
Hey, it's all good, man.
121
00:07:00,762 --> 00:07:01,804
She can go ahead.
122
00:07:02,847 --> 00:07:04,933
I'm holding up the line, it's my fault.
123
00:07:10,312 --> 00:07:13,816
So, forgot about my keys, sorry, man.
It has pockets everywhere.
124
00:07:13,942 --> 00:07:16,027
[cell phone ringing]
125
00:07:34,629 --> 00:07:36,672
[breathing heavily]
126
00:07:38,674 --> 00:07:40,635
Oh, shit, shit, shit!
127
00:07:43,638 --> 00:07:44,513
Breathe.
128
00:07:45,222 --> 00:07:46,557
[exhales] Five...
129
00:07:46,766 --> 00:07:48,225
Four, three,
130
00:07:48,601 --> 00:07:50,311
two, one.
131
00:07:50,645 --> 00:07:53,022
[cell phone ringing]
132
00:07:57,735 --> 00:07:58,611
Hey, Dr. M.
133
00:07:58,694 --> 00:08:00,989
DR. M: Jane, Jane, I have
a situation here at Life House
134
00:08:01,072 --> 00:08:02,490
I have Kara here with me
135
00:08:02,573 --> 00:08:04,742
and she's suggesting
that you're planning on doing something.
136
00:08:04,826 --> 00:08:05,701
Is that correct?
137
00:08:05,785 --> 00:08:08,370
Kara, she can't sleep
when I'm not there, you know that.
138
00:08:08,621 --> 00:08:09,872
Why don't you ask her about that?
139
00:08:09,956 --> 00:08:12,000
Is that true what she's saying
that you can't sleep?
140
00:08:12,083 --> 00:08:13,626
Are you trying
to keep her from living, Kara.
141
00:08:14,169 --> 00:08:16,545
OK, OK, Jane, listen to me,
I'm concerned.
142
00:08:16,629 --> 00:08:18,089
I want you to wait at the airport for me.
143
00:08:18,173 --> 00:08:20,216
I think we should speak in person
before you fly home.
144
00:08:20,299 --> 00:08:23,928
Dr.... Dr. M, I wish I could. I just...
It's Kara,
145
00:08:24,012 --> 00:08:26,347
you know what she's like,
she's not in her right mind.
146
00:08:26,430 --> 00:08:29,058
She's a liar, she's a compulsive liar.
She doesn't want me to leave
147
00:08:29,142 --> 00:08:31,060
because she's not loved herself.
148
00:08:31,560 --> 00:08:33,270
[Kara breathing heavily]
149
00:08:34,271 --> 00:08:38,609
KARA: I hate you! I hate you!
I hate you! I hate you!
150
00:08:40,111 --> 00:08:42,404
Um... Uh, Dr. M...
151
00:08:43,531 --> 00:08:45,241
I gotta go, I gotta go.
152
00:08:45,992 --> 00:08:48,494
My flight is boarding. Fuck!
153
00:08:48,661 --> 00:08:50,621
[Kara screams]
154
00:08:50,705 --> 00:08:51,956
Fuck.
155
00:08:55,751 --> 00:08:57,670
[glass shattering]
156
00:08:57,962 --> 00:08:59,922
I hate you! I hate you!
157
00:09:03,718 --> 00:09:06,262
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
158
00:09:22,486 --> 00:09:23,362
[door opens]
159
00:09:23,445 --> 00:09:24,321
MAN: Hello?
160
00:09:29,535 --> 00:09:30,411
Hello?
161
00:09:34,665 --> 00:09:36,126
[knock on the door]
162
00:09:36,209 --> 00:09:37,085
Is everything OK?
163
00:09:44,008 --> 00:09:44,842
Whoa!
164
00:09:44,926 --> 00:09:46,719
What are you doing in here?
165
00:09:46,886 --> 00:09:49,139
I'm sorry but the better question is
what are you doing in here?
166
00:09:49,222 --> 00:09:50,307
This is the mens' room.
12428
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