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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:27,444 [triumphant bagpipe music playing] 2 00:01:00,810 --> 00:01:03,188 [inspirational music playing] 3 00:01:21,956 --> 00:01:23,166 [man in distorted voice] Eggy. 4 00:01:25,877 --> 00:01:28,046 You mind if I share your cab? 5 00:01:37,680 --> 00:01:38,681 Charlie? 6 00:01:42,393 --> 00:01:43,770 It's ironic, isn't it? 7 00:01:44,854 --> 00:01:47,065 You look like a gentleman, I look like a pleb. 8 00:01:48,316 --> 00:01:50,110 If I was you, I'd unlock your cab. 9 00:02:03,081 --> 00:02:04,374 [beeping] 10 00:02:07,836 --> 00:02:09,546 [Charlie grunts] 11 00:02:09,629 --> 00:02:11,381 Pete, get us out of here! 12 00:02:12,298 --> 00:02:14,676 -[Charlie grunting] -[tires squealing] 13 00:02:17,720 --> 00:02:19,389 [grunting] 14 00:02:20,932 --> 00:02:22,934 ["Let's Go Crazy" playing] 15 00:02:31,568 --> 00:02:32,944 [electricity crackling] 16 00:02:33,778 --> 00:02:35,238 You think that shit's gonna work this time? 17 00:02:36,656 --> 00:02:38,158 You're way out of your depth. 18 00:02:39,617 --> 00:02:40,660 [yells] 19 00:02:43,830 --> 00:02:45,415 [metal scraping] 20 00:02:56,968 --> 00:02:58,469 [yells] 21 00:02:59,429 --> 00:03:00,638 [screams] 22 00:03:16,112 --> 00:03:17,363 [groans] 23 00:03:20,950 --> 00:03:22,327 [yells] 24 00:03:22,785 --> 00:03:23,870 [gasps] 25 00:03:24,370 --> 00:03:25,371 Fuck! 26 00:03:25,997 --> 00:03:27,081 [yells] 27 00:03:36,883 --> 00:03:37,884 [grunting] 28 00:03:44,390 --> 00:03:45,391 [screams] 29 00:03:45,808 --> 00:03:47,018 [grunts] 30 00:04:07,622 --> 00:04:08,623 [yells] 31 00:04:09,791 --> 00:04:10,875 [grunts] 32 00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:24,555 [yells] 33 00:04:52,083 --> 00:04:53,376 [panting] 34 00:05:01,926 --> 00:05:03,553 [engine revving] 35 00:05:04,762 --> 00:05:06,097 [whirring] 36 00:05:09,892 --> 00:05:11,394 [tires squealing] 37 00:05:35,710 --> 00:05:37,420 Take him out! 38 00:05:48,097 --> 00:05:49,515 Merlin! We've got a Code Purple. 39 00:05:49,599 --> 00:05:50,600 My driver's down. 40 00:05:50,683 --> 00:05:52,393 Permission to blow these fuckers away. 41 00:05:52,727 --> 00:05:53,728 [Merlin] Denied. 42 00:05:53,811 --> 00:05:55,563 Cannot be contained. 43 00:05:56,189 --> 00:05:57,398 Head south, I'm clearing the route. 44 00:06:06,074 --> 00:06:07,283 [gasping] 45 00:06:41,234 --> 00:06:42,276 Shit! 46 00:06:48,699 --> 00:06:49,992 Merlin, I'm entering Hyde Park. 47 00:06:50,076 --> 00:06:51,369 Can I get on with it? 48 00:06:55,414 --> 00:06:56,457 Merlin! 49 00:06:56,541 --> 00:06:58,417 Dark zone confirmed. Permission to fire. 50 00:06:58,501 --> 00:06:59,544 Oh, thank fuck for that! 51 00:06:59,627 --> 00:07:00,628 [beeps] 52 00:07:15,685 --> 00:07:18,020 [Merlin] No time to relax. Police are right behind you. 53 00:07:18,438 --> 00:07:20,565 You have 30 seconds before they reach your position. 54 00:07:20,648 --> 00:07:22,692 Go directly to Rendezvous Swan. 55 00:07:33,619 --> 00:07:36,205 Merlin, you do realize I haven't even got a windscreen right now? 56 00:07:36,372 --> 00:07:39,292 I remember from your training you were good at holding your breath. 57 00:07:39,417 --> 00:07:41,127 [sirens wailing] 58 00:07:43,254 --> 00:07:44,630 [sighs] 59 00:08:06,068 --> 00:08:07,236 [deep inhale] 60 00:09:07,171 --> 00:09:08,464 [gasping] 61 00:09:09,799 --> 00:09:11,842 [coughing] 62 00:09:18,057 --> 00:09:19,600 [Merlin] It wasn't a revenge mission. 63 00:09:19,684 --> 00:09:21,644 Charlie could've just killed you immediately. 64 00:09:21,727 --> 00:09:23,437 Not boasting, but I trained him well enough 65 00:09:23,521 --> 00:09:24,981 that even he wouldn't mess that up. 66 00:09:25,064 --> 00:09:27,483 [Eggsy] I'm sorry, we're gonna do the debrief tomorrow. 67 00:09:27,567 --> 00:09:29,819 I've got to get to a dinner tonight and if I miss it, 68 00:09:29,902 --> 00:09:31,153 Charlie might as well have killed me. 69 00:09:31,237 --> 00:09:33,698 If you can't wait for the police to clear the park, 70 00:09:33,781 --> 00:09:35,324 there's another way out in the corner. 71 00:09:43,165 --> 00:09:44,375 [gags and coughs] 72 00:09:45,626 --> 00:09:46,627 Fuck! 73 00:09:46,711 --> 00:09:48,421 -[chuckles] -[Eggsy groans] 74 00:09:48,504 --> 00:09:50,298 How important is that dinner? 75 00:09:53,676 --> 00:09:54,760 [sighs] 76 00:09:55,177 --> 00:09:56,262 Let me show you. 77 00:10:08,566 --> 00:10:09,900 [whirring] 78 00:10:23,831 --> 00:10:25,875 [dramatic music playing] 79 00:10:31,714 --> 00:10:32,965 [grunts] 80 00:10:33,341 --> 00:10:34,508 [gasping] 81 00:10:41,599 --> 00:10:43,017 For fuck's sake! 82 00:10:46,437 --> 00:10:48,481 -[door opens] -Babe. 83 00:10:49,774 --> 00:10:50,858 I'm home! 84 00:10:50,941 --> 00:10:51,984 I'm here. 85 00:10:58,532 --> 00:11:00,451 What the hell happened? 86 00:11:00,534 --> 00:11:03,412 It's a long story that deserves a kiss. 87 00:11:03,954 --> 00:11:06,332 [chuckles] Not even JB would kiss you right now. 88 00:11:08,459 --> 00:11:10,795 [Eggsy] If you really love me, just one little kiss. 89 00:11:13,798 --> 00:11:14,882 [gasps] 90 00:11:14,965 --> 00:11:16,300 You were really gonna do it? 91 00:11:16,384 --> 00:11:17,468 Yeah. 92 00:11:17,551 --> 00:11:19,220 Now, that is true love right there. 93 00:11:19,303 --> 00:11:21,305 Amazing. I'm gonna go get changed. 94 00:11:23,474 --> 00:11:25,726 [all singing] ♪ Happy birthday to you! ♪ 95 00:11:28,354 --> 00:11:30,064 [cheering and whooping] 96 00:11:30,773 --> 00:11:33,234 And Tilde made that for you herself, bruv. 97 00:11:33,317 --> 00:11:34,652 [Princess Tilde] Mmm-hmm. 98 00:11:34,735 --> 00:11:36,320 The royal baker's not available. 99 00:11:36,404 --> 00:11:38,989 -[laughter] -Oh, shut up, Brandon. 100 00:11:39,073 --> 00:11:41,367 Especially if you want some of this. 101 00:11:41,450 --> 00:11:43,369 Wait. Is that that Swedish stuff right there? 102 00:11:43,452 --> 00:11:44,453 Yes. 103 00:11:44,537 --> 00:11:45,704 No. I ain't drinkin' that. 104 00:11:45,788 --> 00:11:47,623 Last time here, I was wrecked, man. 105 00:11:47,706 --> 00:11:49,333 That's 'cause you were a lightweight. 106 00:11:49,417 --> 00:11:50,751 [laughing] 107 00:11:50,835 --> 00:11:53,504 No, no, babe, I'm good. Not for me, thank you. 108 00:11:53,754 --> 00:11:55,714 Oh, what? What's going on, man? 109 00:11:55,798 --> 00:11:58,175 I'm meeting her parents for the first time tomorrow night. 110 00:11:58,259 --> 00:11:59,385 [whooping] 111 00:11:59,468 --> 00:12:01,429 I wanna make a good impression, so what? 112 00:12:01,720 --> 00:12:05,474 Oh, yeah, Jamal, are you free to dogsit JB tomorrow night while we're there? 113 00:12:05,558 --> 00:12:07,476 Sorry, I've got to look after my nan tomorrow. 114 00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:08,727 But Liam's free, though. 115 00:12:08,811 --> 00:12:09,895 [Eggsy] Oh, yeah? 116 00:12:09,979 --> 00:12:11,856 I can't, mate. I'm allergic to dogs. 117 00:12:11,939 --> 00:12:12,940 Bullshit. 118 00:12:13,023 --> 00:12:14,191 Dogshit, actually. 119 00:12:14,275 --> 00:12:15,359 [laughing] 120 00:12:15,443 --> 00:12:17,445 That leaves you. What you doing tomorrow night? 121 00:12:17,528 --> 00:12:20,239 Yeah, I'll look after your dog, mate, but I got one condition. 122 00:12:20,531 --> 00:12:21,615 What's that? 123 00:12:21,699 --> 00:12:23,159 -You have a drink with us. -Yeah. 124 00:12:23,242 --> 00:12:24,452 Got to do it, babe. 125 00:12:24,535 --> 00:12:25,661 -Got to do it. -[exclaims] 126 00:12:25,744 --> 00:12:27,121 Brandon, happy birthday! 127 00:12:27,872 --> 00:12:29,081 [all] Happy birthday. 128 00:12:29,373 --> 00:12:30,624 -[Jamal] Yeah. -[Eggsy] Cheers. 129 00:12:31,125 --> 00:12:32,126 Shit. 130 00:12:35,171 --> 00:12:37,923 [Poppy] My drugs are everywhere. 131 00:12:40,009 --> 00:12:41,594 They were never my thing, 132 00:12:41,677 --> 00:12:42,887 but here I am, 133 00:12:42,970 --> 00:12:45,931 running the biggest drug cartel in the world. 134 00:12:47,183 --> 00:12:51,562 The only downside is having to live in the middle of nowhere. 135 00:12:54,064 --> 00:12:57,735 You know, these ruins are technically undiscovered. 136 00:12:57,818 --> 00:13:00,654 I just added a few touches to remind me of home. 137 00:13:02,156 --> 00:13:05,826 I grew up on all that awesome '50s nostalgia. 138 00:13:06,285 --> 00:13:09,538 Grease. American Graffiti. Happy Days. 139 00:13:10,873 --> 00:13:12,333 But I digress. 140 00:13:12,500 --> 00:13:14,293 The thing you need to understand 141 00:13:14,376 --> 00:13:16,337 is the hard work and ingenuity 142 00:13:16,504 --> 00:13:19,673 it took to achieve a global monopoly 143 00:13:19,757 --> 00:13:21,717 on the drug trade. 144 00:13:22,259 --> 00:13:25,387 And that's all on me. Not to toot my own horn… 145 00:13:25,471 --> 00:13:28,682 I just think it's really important for new recruits to understand 146 00:13:28,766 --> 00:13:31,644 the history of The Golden Circle. 147 00:13:36,190 --> 00:13:39,276 So. Lifelong friends, huh? 148 00:13:39,985 --> 00:13:43,030 Charles, do you think your buddy here is worthy of joining us? 149 00:13:43,531 --> 00:13:46,534 I would not have brought him all the way if I didn't think so. 150 00:13:46,617 --> 00:13:48,452 Excellent. Well, you hungry? 151 00:13:48,536 --> 00:13:49,745 Starving. 152 00:13:49,828 --> 00:13:52,248 Wonderful! Right this way. 153 00:13:52,331 --> 00:13:53,749 Make yourselves at home. 154 00:13:55,251 --> 00:13:57,503 So, fellas, 155 00:13:57,586 --> 00:14:01,173 I have a couple of things that I wanna clarify. 156 00:14:02,591 --> 00:14:04,677 You understand that in The Golden Circle 157 00:14:04,760 --> 00:14:08,097 my authority is never to be questioned, right? 158 00:14:08,180 --> 00:14:09,807 And the importance of following orders? 159 00:14:09,890 --> 00:14:11,559 Do you understand that? 160 00:14:12,101 --> 00:14:13,936 And the value of loyalty? 161 00:14:15,145 --> 00:14:16,939 It's easy to nod, isn't it? 162 00:14:19,858 --> 00:14:22,486 I don't like easy. I like proof. 163 00:14:23,988 --> 00:14:25,406 [sighs] 164 00:14:27,575 --> 00:14:29,785 -What's your name? -Angel, ma'am. 165 00:14:30,244 --> 00:14:31,829 Angel, baby. 166 00:14:31,912 --> 00:14:32,913 Hey. 167 00:14:33,038 --> 00:14:34,999 Your old pal, Charles, has messed up. 168 00:14:35,499 --> 00:14:37,918 That's all I'll tell, 'cause that's all you need to know. 169 00:14:38,002 --> 00:14:39,378 So put him in the mincer, okay? 170 00:14:42,131 --> 00:14:43,882 [laughing] 171 00:14:51,932 --> 00:14:53,517 [whirring] 172 00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:02,651 [whistles] 173 00:15:05,195 --> 00:15:06,822 [growling] 174 00:15:08,365 --> 00:15:09,909 [whirring] 175 00:15:19,460 --> 00:15:21,545 [dramatic music playing] 176 00:15:21,629 --> 00:15:22,796 [barking] 177 00:15:38,979 --> 00:15:40,397 [yelling] 178 00:15:41,815 --> 00:15:43,817 No, Miss Poppy! [screaming] 179 00:16:03,212 --> 00:16:04,338 Good job! 180 00:16:04,421 --> 00:16:06,006 [panting] 181 00:16:06,090 --> 00:16:07,967 See my salon across the way? 182 00:16:11,637 --> 00:16:13,347 Head there for your makeover. 183 00:16:19,311 --> 00:16:20,646 [sizzling] 184 00:16:23,816 --> 00:16:26,402 [Princess Tilde] Eggsy, I hope you're hungry. 185 00:16:29,405 --> 00:16:31,949 Oh, babe, I was gonna grab breakfast at work. 186 00:16:32,032 --> 00:16:33,701 This looks lovely, but I'm running late. 187 00:16:33,784 --> 00:16:36,912 I just thought maybe we could practice? 188 00:16:36,996 --> 00:16:37,997 For tonight. 189 00:16:38,497 --> 00:16:39,748 -Practice? -Mmm-hmm. 190 00:16:39,832 --> 00:16:40,833 Eating? 191 00:16:40,958 --> 00:16:44,044 You said you've never eaten at a palace before. 192 00:16:44,128 --> 00:16:47,589 And Pappa is sort of picky about table manners. 193 00:16:47,673 --> 00:16:50,843 Well, as it happens, babe, I've got this shit on lock. 194 00:16:50,926 --> 00:16:54,054 I know what every single one of them knives and forks is for. 195 00:16:56,682 --> 00:16:58,600 This is a butter knife. 196 00:16:58,934 --> 00:17:01,395 It's the only one you need to remember, the rest is easy. 197 00:17:01,478 --> 00:17:04,356 You start from the outside, and you work your way in with each course. 198 00:17:04,898 --> 00:17:07,401 And never let anyone describe you as "HKLP." 199 00:17:07,484 --> 00:17:08,610 What's that? 200 00:17:08,694 --> 00:17:10,404 "Holds knife like pen." 201 00:17:10,487 --> 00:17:13,532 A habit erroneously believed to be upper-class dining etiquette. 202 00:17:13,699 --> 00:17:15,534 It is quite the opposite. 203 00:17:18,120 --> 00:17:21,749 White wine, pudding wine, red wine, water and pop. 204 00:17:22,541 --> 00:17:24,084 Or whatever tipple takes your fancy. 205 00:17:26,128 --> 00:17:28,839 Am I supposed to wait before I start eating? 206 00:17:28,922 --> 00:17:30,424 [Harry] Only if the dish is cold. 207 00:17:30,507 --> 00:17:33,469 Or if the Queen is present. Otherwise tuck in. 208 00:17:35,137 --> 00:17:37,639 Got to be honest, never really thought the royalty bit 209 00:17:37,723 --> 00:17:38,891 would be relevant. 210 00:17:39,808 --> 00:17:41,018 Harry would've been chuffed. 211 00:17:41,518 --> 00:17:44,855 Oh. I wish I could've met him. 212 00:17:50,486 --> 00:17:52,780 You miss him too, don't you, Mr. Pickle? 213 00:17:54,573 --> 00:17:55,657 Mmm? 214 00:18:05,125 --> 00:18:06,418 Mr. Pickle says, "Yeah." 215 00:18:08,212 --> 00:18:09,880 Hey, no, no, sit down, I'm fine. 216 00:18:10,047 --> 00:18:11,924 I'm fine. Have a good day. 217 00:18:12,716 --> 00:18:13,717 Okay. 218 00:18:15,135 --> 00:18:17,179 [sentimental music playing] 219 00:18:40,911 --> 00:18:43,872 Ah, Galahad! You're late. 220 00:18:44,164 --> 00:18:47,543 We were wondering if you'd had a second encounter with Charlie. 221 00:18:48,001 --> 00:18:50,546 I wish. I'm looking forward to finishing him off. 222 00:18:55,259 --> 00:18:56,385 All right, gents. 223 00:18:58,011 --> 00:18:59,054 Merlin, come in. 224 00:18:59,888 --> 00:19:02,933 Galahad and Lancelot, please remain for Merlin's debrief. 225 00:19:03,308 --> 00:19:06,728 Everyone else, reconvene at 1900 hours. 226 00:19:08,063 --> 00:19:09,064 So… 227 00:19:10,899 --> 00:19:12,776 the man who attacked Galahad in the taxi 228 00:19:12,860 --> 00:19:14,486 was Charlie Hesketh. 229 00:19:14,570 --> 00:19:16,613 Rejected Kingsman applicant turned bad. 230 00:19:16,697 --> 00:19:19,074 We last saw him back at Richmond Valentine's HQ. 231 00:19:19,158 --> 00:19:21,451 [Eggsy] I've caught a fucking spy! 232 00:19:21,535 --> 00:19:23,453 [electricity crackling] 233 00:19:25,956 --> 00:19:27,207 Like everyone else there, 234 00:19:27,291 --> 00:19:29,251 Charlie had a security implant in his neck. 235 00:19:29,418 --> 00:19:32,087 A weakness we had no choice but to exploit. 236 00:19:34,381 --> 00:19:38,093 Hey, Merlin. Still fucking spectacular, eh? 237 00:19:41,013 --> 00:19:43,265 Come on, guys, loosen up. We saved the world. 238 00:19:44,057 --> 00:19:45,309 [Merlin] Yeah. 239 00:19:45,392 --> 00:19:48,478 Unfortunately, Galahad, you also saved Charlie. 240 00:19:49,479 --> 00:19:52,399 When you electrocuted him, you damaged his implant. 241 00:19:52,482 --> 00:19:56,236 Instead of his head exploding, he only lost an arm and his vocal chords. 242 00:19:57,404 --> 00:19:58,739 Fucker should be thanking me. 243 00:19:58,822 --> 00:20:00,449 And now he's back for revenge? 244 00:20:00,532 --> 00:20:02,117 We don't think so, sir. 245 00:20:02,201 --> 00:20:04,536 He's being recruited by an unknown organization. 246 00:20:04,620 --> 00:20:05,829 Lancelot? 247 00:20:05,913 --> 00:20:10,208 Got the police autopsy reports from Charlie's colleagues in the SUVs. 248 00:20:10,292 --> 00:20:11,627 They're not just goons for hire. 249 00:20:12,544 --> 00:20:13,921 Fingerprints removed. 250 00:20:14,004 --> 00:20:15,088 Teeth filed smooth. 251 00:20:15,172 --> 00:20:17,424 I did a face recognition. Nothing. 252 00:20:17,591 --> 00:20:18,800 And that thing? 253 00:20:18,884 --> 00:20:22,137 A cosmetic tattoo made of 24-carat gold. 254 00:20:22,763 --> 00:20:24,181 They all had them. 255 00:20:24,556 --> 00:20:28,060 Seems like we're looking at some kind of underworld organization. 256 00:20:32,189 --> 00:20:34,483 Señora Poppy has sent me for my makeover. 257 00:20:34,566 --> 00:20:35,651 Follow me. 258 00:20:40,364 --> 00:20:41,448 Please take your shirt off. 259 00:20:51,416 --> 00:20:52,584 [whirring] 260 00:21:08,058 --> 00:21:09,268 [groaning] 261 00:21:12,062 --> 00:21:13,563 [yelling] 262 00:21:15,065 --> 00:21:16,733 [panting] 263 00:21:20,904 --> 00:21:22,781 [mellow music playing] 264 00:21:23,573 --> 00:21:24,616 It's beautiful, isn't it? 265 00:21:25,826 --> 00:21:27,327 Not that. 266 00:21:28,370 --> 00:21:29,705 This. 267 00:21:29,788 --> 00:21:32,457 ♪ The sun is out, the sky is blue ♪ 268 00:21:32,541 --> 00:21:34,459 Bon appétit. 269 00:21:34,543 --> 00:21:37,796 ♪ There's not a cloud to spoil the view ♪ 270 00:21:37,879 --> 00:21:40,090 ♪ But it's raining ♪ 271 00:21:42,009 --> 00:21:44,845 ♪ Raining in my heart ♪ 272 00:21:47,806 --> 00:21:54,271 ♪ Oh, misery, misery ♪ 273 00:21:57,149 --> 00:22:03,238 ♪ What's gonna become of me? ♪ 274 00:22:14,499 --> 00:22:15,917 How is it? 275 00:22:16,084 --> 00:22:18,086 It's delicious. 276 00:22:19,338 --> 00:22:22,299 Welcome to Golden Circle. 277 00:22:23,216 --> 00:22:26,636 ♪ Raining in my heart ♪ 278 00:22:32,726 --> 00:22:34,728 [classical music playing] 279 00:22:35,395 --> 00:22:36,897 [Eggsy] Mmm. 280 00:22:36,980 --> 00:22:38,190 [in Swedish] This is delicious. 281 00:22:38,899 --> 00:22:40,358 [chuckling] 282 00:22:40,984 --> 00:22:45,155 [in English] I think we should do you the favor of conversing in English, yes. 283 00:22:47,991 --> 00:22:50,410 So, tell me, what do you do? 284 00:22:50,494 --> 00:22:53,288 I work for Kingsman, the tailors, Your Highness. 285 00:22:53,371 --> 00:22:56,541 You may address my daughter as "Your Highness." 286 00:22:56,625 --> 00:23:00,003 Please address the Queen and myself with "Your Majesty." 287 00:23:00,087 --> 00:23:04,341 Pappa, this is a family dinner, not some state function. 288 00:23:04,883 --> 00:23:07,636 -Well, then, Eggsy. -[clears throat] 289 00:23:07,719 --> 00:23:11,932 What do you make of the current situation in the Indian financial markets? 290 00:23:12,557 --> 00:23:13,475 Pappa! 291 00:23:14,267 --> 00:23:15,477 [Eggsy] Uh… 292 00:23:18,313 --> 00:23:19,397 Well… 293 00:23:22,275 --> 00:23:24,111 I don't think we can underestimate the impact 294 00:23:24,194 --> 00:23:26,113 of ECB's quantitative easing measures, 295 00:23:26,196 --> 00:23:29,449 and the liquidity wave from the US Federal Reserve rate hike 296 00:23:29,533 --> 00:23:30,826 getting pushed back. 297 00:23:36,081 --> 00:23:37,624 [clinking] 298 00:23:40,502 --> 00:23:41,753 Frida Kahlo. 299 00:23:42,379 --> 00:23:45,715 Well, other than the 1939 acquisition by the Louvre, 300 00:23:45,799 --> 00:23:49,177 she wasn't really acknowledged until the new Mexicanísimo art movement 301 00:23:49,261 --> 00:23:50,971 of the late 1970s. 302 00:23:52,848 --> 00:23:53,932 [clinking] 303 00:23:55,851 --> 00:23:56,935 Moorish revival. 304 00:23:57,060 --> 00:23:59,521 Ah. The Palazzo Sammezzano. 305 00:23:59,604 --> 00:24:00,730 In Tuscany. 306 00:24:01,565 --> 00:24:03,150 Beautiful. 307 00:24:03,233 --> 00:24:04,442 [clinking] 308 00:24:04,526 --> 00:24:05,819 Bluetooth technology. 309 00:24:05,902 --> 00:24:07,404 Which, of course, got its name 310 00:24:07,487 --> 00:24:10,365 from the legendary Danish king, Harald Blåtand, 311 00:24:10,448 --> 00:24:13,618 whose name translates to "Bluetooth" in English. 312 00:24:14,286 --> 00:24:17,247 And the Bluetooth logo is his initials in Norse runic symbols. 313 00:24:17,330 --> 00:24:18,874 And, as I'm sure you know, 314 00:24:18,957 --> 00:24:23,378 the Bluetooth logo is his initials in Norse runic symbols. 315 00:24:24,296 --> 00:24:25,297 [Roxy] Oh, my God, Eggsy. 316 00:24:25,380 --> 00:24:27,257 Why isn't he eating his fucking pudding? 317 00:24:27,340 --> 00:24:29,050 I need to research this gold tattoo. 318 00:24:29,134 --> 00:24:31,678 I found records of other people with the same body modifications. 319 00:24:33,555 --> 00:24:35,056 They have high-level involvement 320 00:24:35,140 --> 00:24:36,975 with crime and international drug trafficking. 321 00:24:37,309 --> 00:24:40,020 And there's rumors of something called The Golden Circle. 322 00:24:40,187 --> 00:24:41,146 Hmm. 323 00:24:41,730 --> 00:24:43,148 [beeping] 324 00:24:47,861 --> 00:24:49,154 Best agent or best friend? 325 00:24:53,825 --> 00:24:55,160 [JB barking] 326 00:24:58,371 --> 00:24:59,998 [Brandon] Come on, JB. Give it a rest, mate. 327 00:25:01,166 --> 00:25:04,044 Stop scratching the door. I'm gonna get the blame now. 328 00:25:04,127 --> 00:25:05,212 There you are. Happy? 329 00:25:20,310 --> 00:25:21,937 With the decks and all that. 330 00:25:22,020 --> 00:25:23,396 [beeps] 331 00:25:24,439 --> 00:25:25,690 Shit, boy! 332 00:25:25,774 --> 00:25:27,067 [exclaims] What the… 333 00:25:34,574 --> 00:25:35,659 Do you reckon, JB, 334 00:25:36,868 --> 00:25:38,036 model material? 335 00:25:38,703 --> 00:25:40,205 [Eggsy chuckling] 336 00:25:41,122 --> 00:25:43,959 I must say, you're really not as I expected. 337 00:25:45,335 --> 00:25:46,962 Well, thank you very much, 338 00:25:47,462 --> 00:25:48,672 Your Majesty. 339 00:25:49,297 --> 00:25:50,966 [Brandon] Eggsy? Is that you, mate? 340 00:25:51,049 --> 00:25:52,884 What the fuck is going on here? 341 00:25:52,968 --> 00:25:54,135 You a gangster now or something? 342 00:25:54,469 --> 00:25:56,930 Fuckin' hell. Is that Tilde's mom and dad's house? 343 00:25:57,013 --> 00:25:58,515 Whatever you're doing, I want in. 344 00:25:58,598 --> 00:26:00,141 [device activates, beeping] 345 00:26:00,225 --> 00:26:01,851 Put it down! 346 00:26:02,519 --> 00:26:03,770 Why? 347 00:26:04,521 --> 00:26:06,481 I said, put it down now! 348 00:26:06,564 --> 00:26:07,565 What's wrong with it? 349 00:26:08,525 --> 00:26:10,110 Shut it! Fucking shut it! 350 00:26:10,193 --> 00:26:11,987 -Eggsy. -I beg your pardon? 351 00:26:12,070 --> 00:26:13,738 -[rapid beeping] -Shut it now! 352 00:26:13,822 --> 00:26:16,074 All right, mate. Chill your boots. 353 00:26:16,157 --> 00:26:17,158 [sighs] 354 00:26:17,242 --> 00:26:18,910 Eggsy, what… 355 00:26:19,911 --> 00:26:21,705 Oh, no. Oh, my God, no. I'm so sorry. 356 00:26:21,788 --> 00:26:22,789 [barking] 357 00:26:22,872 --> 00:26:24,374 Shut up. You got me in enough trouble. 358 00:26:35,552 --> 00:26:36,845 [alarm blaring] 359 00:26:36,928 --> 00:26:38,138 [grunts] 360 00:26:52,235 --> 00:26:54,362 The next order of business, 361 00:26:54,446 --> 00:26:56,281 Agent Percival. 362 00:27:02,954 --> 00:27:04,039 Arthur. 363 00:27:07,792 --> 00:27:08,793 Oh, fuck. 364 00:27:14,799 --> 00:27:15,842 [Poppy] Yep. 365 00:27:16,384 --> 00:27:19,637 Kingsman is crumpets. 366 00:27:21,473 --> 00:27:25,185 Like toast, but British. 367 00:27:25,310 --> 00:27:27,187 And to say thank you, 368 00:27:27,270 --> 00:27:29,147 I got you a present, Charlie. 369 00:27:29,773 --> 00:27:34,527 My guys made you this. 370 00:27:36,946 --> 00:27:41,326 Bigger, badder, better. I call it, 371 00:27:41,493 --> 00:27:43,912 "ARMageddon." 372 00:27:50,168 --> 00:27:51,586 [whirring] 373 00:28:03,431 --> 00:28:05,058 Let's see if your game improves. 374 00:28:17,987 --> 00:28:19,239 Ouch. 375 00:28:57,402 --> 00:29:00,280 [Eggsy] Someone decides to wipe out every Kingsman property, 376 00:29:00,989 --> 00:29:03,283 every agent, and somehow, 377 00:29:03,658 --> 00:29:05,410 conveniently, you weren't at home. 378 00:29:06,244 --> 00:29:07,871 I could say the same thing about you. 379 00:29:07,954 --> 00:29:09,664 What, you think I'd kill Roxy? 380 00:29:10,498 --> 00:29:13,001 And my mate, Brandon, and my fucking dog? 381 00:29:13,084 --> 00:29:14,085 [Merlin] No. 382 00:29:16,463 --> 00:29:17,630 You think I would? 383 00:29:22,302 --> 00:29:24,637 This thing 384 00:29:25,847 --> 00:29:27,140 hacked us. 385 00:29:28,308 --> 00:29:30,560 Clearly, this arm can be remotely controlled. 386 00:29:31,895 --> 00:29:35,315 I'm only alive because my address wasn't on the database with the agents. 387 00:29:36,441 --> 00:29:37,775 Whoever Charlie's working with 388 00:29:37,859 --> 00:29:42,280 doesn't think that mere staff are missile-worthy. 389 00:29:43,281 --> 00:29:44,741 This ain't funny. 390 00:29:44,824 --> 00:29:46,951 Roxy is dead! 391 00:29:47,035 --> 00:29:49,162 Everyone's dead! Gone! Do you even care? 392 00:29:49,245 --> 00:29:50,538 Pull yourself together. 393 00:29:50,663 --> 00:29:52,207 Remember your training. 394 00:29:53,291 --> 00:29:55,585 There's no time for emotion in this scenario. 395 00:29:58,463 --> 00:29:59,547 Now, 396 00:29:59,631 --> 00:30:01,800 as all surviving agents are present, 397 00:30:01,883 --> 00:30:03,802 we follow the doomsday protocol. 398 00:30:04,344 --> 00:30:07,388 When that's done, and only then, 399 00:30:09,682 --> 00:30:11,184 you may shed a tear in private. 400 00:30:11,935 --> 00:30:13,853 -[sighs] -[thunder rumbling] 401 00:30:14,646 --> 00:30:15,772 Okay. 402 00:30:16,648 --> 00:30:18,066 What's the doomsday protocol? 403 00:30:19,651 --> 00:30:21,152 We go shopping. 404 00:30:35,667 --> 00:30:38,419 We're from Kingsman. We'd like to buy some wine. 405 00:30:39,087 --> 00:30:41,840 And use tasting room number three, please. 406 00:30:45,635 --> 00:30:49,264 Not one of my predecessors has ever been in this situation before. 407 00:30:51,516 --> 00:30:52,725 Thank God. 408 00:30:56,020 --> 00:30:57,021 A-ha. 409 00:31:00,692 --> 00:31:01,901 Remember this? 410 00:31:01,985 --> 00:31:03,111 [Eggsy] How could I forget? 411 00:31:12,704 --> 00:31:15,540 Whatever's in that safe is the answer to all our problems. 412 00:31:23,172 --> 00:31:24,299 Huh. 413 00:31:26,634 --> 00:31:28,720 [suspenseful music playing] 414 00:31:31,848 --> 00:31:32,932 Is that it? 415 00:31:33,016 --> 00:31:35,101 I suppose that must be upper-class humor. 416 00:31:37,020 --> 00:31:38,021 I don't get it. 417 00:31:38,104 --> 00:31:40,064 Me neither. What are we supposed to do now? 418 00:31:42,025 --> 00:31:44,861 We should drink a toast to our fallen comrades. 419 00:31:49,616 --> 00:31:50,700 To Roxy. 420 00:31:50,783 --> 00:31:51,868 Roxy. 421 00:31:55,955 --> 00:31:57,040 Ooh. 422 00:32:00,293 --> 00:32:02,128 -To Arthur. -Arthur. 423 00:32:05,840 --> 00:32:06,925 Mmm. 424 00:32:07,342 --> 00:32:08,384 Should we do one for JB? 425 00:32:08,509 --> 00:32:09,761 I think we should. 426 00:32:16,184 --> 00:32:17,936 [Merlin sobbing] 427 00:32:23,483 --> 00:32:25,318 I should have seen it coming. 428 00:32:26,194 --> 00:32:27,737 Charlie, the taxi. 429 00:32:27,820 --> 00:32:29,280 It's all my fault. 430 00:32:29,364 --> 00:32:32,867 No, that's bullshit, Merlin. It ain't all your fault. 431 00:32:33,910 --> 00:32:35,453 You're the best, bruv. 432 00:32:35,536 --> 00:32:36,704 Honestly, without you… 433 00:32:37,664 --> 00:32:39,666 I'd have lost it a long time ago. 434 00:32:39,749 --> 00:32:41,042 [Merlin mumbles] 435 00:32:42,627 --> 00:32:44,212 I think we should drink to Scotland. 436 00:32:44,295 --> 00:32:46,923 I think we've probably had enough, to be honest. 437 00:32:48,091 --> 00:32:49,300 You're probably right. 438 00:32:51,135 --> 00:32:53,262 [inspirational music playing] 439 00:32:56,975 --> 00:32:58,643 -Merlin. -Aye? 440 00:32:59,435 --> 00:33:01,479 I think we're going to Kentucky… 441 00:33:01,562 --> 00:33:03,439 Fried Chicken? 442 00:33:03,523 --> 00:33:04,732 I love fried chicken. 443 00:33:04,816 --> 00:33:07,235 No, proper Kentucky. Look. 444 00:33:08,319 --> 00:33:10,238 You know what else I love? 445 00:33:10,321 --> 00:33:11,781 Country and western music. 446 00:33:12,782 --> 00:33:14,993 [singing] ♪ Country roads ♪ 447 00:33:15,785 --> 00:33:17,787 ♪ Take me home ♪ 448 00:33:18,705 --> 00:33:22,542 ♪ To the place I belong ♪ 449 00:33:24,085 --> 00:33:26,504 [instrumental "Take Me Home, Country Roads" continues] 450 00:33:37,515 --> 00:33:39,767 [tour guide chattering] 451 00:33:41,185 --> 00:33:44,147 Oh! Here's where we leave the casks to age. 452 00:33:44,230 --> 00:33:48,067 Unfortunately, we can't go in, as it's a temperature-controlled environment. 453 00:33:48,151 --> 00:33:50,903 So let's move on to our world class stud farm, 454 00:33:50,987 --> 00:33:53,197 and meet three of our Kentucky Derby winners. 455 00:33:53,656 --> 00:33:54,949 [whirring] 456 00:33:56,826 --> 00:34:00,455 Biometric security scanner just to protect a few old barrels of whiskey? 457 00:34:01,164 --> 00:34:02,665 Pull the other one, love. 458 00:34:03,499 --> 00:34:04,667 Got it. 459 00:34:12,175 --> 00:34:13,426 Are you getting anything? 460 00:34:14,260 --> 00:34:15,470 Not yet. 461 00:34:17,388 --> 00:34:18,514 [Eggsy] Fucking hell. 462 00:34:18,598 --> 00:34:20,099 [Merlin] It's a shame it's not Scotch. 463 00:34:22,351 --> 00:34:23,352 Hang on. 464 00:34:24,228 --> 00:34:27,607 According to this, there's a huge underground structure right beneath us. 465 00:34:27,815 --> 00:34:29,484 And if my calculations are correct… 466 00:34:33,321 --> 00:34:34,322 This 467 00:34:35,114 --> 00:34:36,532 is the way in. 468 00:34:39,202 --> 00:34:40,912 Fucking hell, Merlin. Shit. 469 00:34:40,995 --> 00:34:42,413 [man] You know, my mama, 470 00:34:43,372 --> 00:34:44,874 she always told me, 471 00:34:45,708 --> 00:34:48,544 us Southerners get our good manners from the British. 472 00:34:49,128 --> 00:34:51,756 I was thinkin', ain't that a pity. 473 00:34:52,340 --> 00:34:54,175 Y'all didn't keep nothing for yourselves. 474 00:35:01,432 --> 00:35:03,851 Y'all ain't never heard of knocking before you enter? 475 00:35:05,103 --> 00:35:07,063 Well, actually we had an invitation. Didn't we? 476 00:35:07,146 --> 00:35:08,314 -Yeah. -Oh, did you now? 477 00:35:08,397 --> 00:35:10,441 Yeah. It came in the shape of a bottle. 478 00:35:11,359 --> 00:35:14,237 We're from the Kingsman tailor shop in London. Maybe you've heard of us? 479 00:35:14,654 --> 00:35:15,780 Oh, the Kingsman. 480 00:35:15,863 --> 00:35:17,240 -Yeah. -Huh. 481 00:35:18,157 --> 00:35:21,202 That's where y'all got them suits and them fancy spectacles y'all got on? 482 00:35:21,285 --> 00:35:22,662 -Exactly. -That's right. 483 00:35:22,745 --> 00:35:24,330 Y'all look damn sharp. 484 00:35:25,164 --> 00:35:26,541 Let me see if I got it right. 485 00:35:26,624 --> 00:35:29,168 You want me to believe that it's normal for a tailor 486 00:35:30,044 --> 00:35:33,131 to hack through an advanced biometric security system 487 00:35:33,214 --> 00:35:35,633 with nothing but a little-bitty old watch on? 488 00:35:41,097 --> 00:35:42,765 I can promise you, 489 00:35:42,849 --> 00:35:44,016 that dog don't hunt. 490 00:35:44,100 --> 00:35:47,687 So why don't you get down on your knees and tell me who you really work for. 491 00:35:55,111 --> 00:35:56,112 [spits] 492 00:35:58,531 --> 00:36:01,117 That's 1963 Statesman Reserve. 493 00:36:01,200 --> 00:36:02,451 You just made it personal. 494 00:36:05,371 --> 00:36:07,123 [grunting] 495 00:36:11,502 --> 00:36:12,503 [groans] 496 00:36:18,968 --> 00:36:20,052 [beeping] 497 00:36:21,637 --> 00:36:23,264 [panting] 498 00:36:23,347 --> 00:36:25,391 Who the fuck are you? 499 00:36:36,068 --> 00:36:38,070 [man] A bottle in a secret wall. 500 00:36:40,031 --> 00:36:42,033 You really expect me to take that seriously? 501 00:36:43,618 --> 00:36:45,453 See, I think your story's horseshit. 502 00:36:45,536 --> 00:36:48,205 Y'all just trying to cover for a failed rescue mission. 503 00:36:49,123 --> 00:36:51,292 You here for the lepidopterist, ain't you? 504 00:36:55,671 --> 00:36:57,965 Okay, so your mystery bottle, huh? 505 00:37:00,509 --> 00:37:02,053 Look anything like that, right there? 506 00:37:02,136 --> 00:37:04,221 Yes. Same brand, much older. 507 00:37:04,889 --> 00:37:05,890 All right. 508 00:37:07,516 --> 00:37:08,601 Let's see here. 509 00:37:10,061 --> 00:37:14,023 You know why the measurement of alcohol content's called "proof"? 510 00:37:14,482 --> 00:37:15,650 Oh, fuck off! 511 00:37:15,733 --> 00:37:17,735 Oh, for Pete's sake. 512 00:37:18,819 --> 00:37:20,571 See, comes from back in the old days 513 00:37:20,655 --> 00:37:23,282 when pirates wanted to test the strength of their rum. 514 00:37:23,366 --> 00:37:25,368 They used to pour a little bit out on gunpowder. 515 00:37:27,870 --> 00:37:28,871 [exhales] 516 00:37:29,372 --> 00:37:31,207 That'll make you wanna slap your mama, boy. 517 00:37:32,833 --> 00:37:35,503 And if the gunpowder, if it burnt when they set it alight, 518 00:37:35,586 --> 00:37:36,671 they considered it proof 519 00:37:37,255 --> 00:37:39,257 that their rum was good and strong. 520 00:37:41,425 --> 00:37:43,844 But see, I ain't got no gunpowder on me, do I? 521 00:37:46,013 --> 00:37:48,808 But I'm pretty sure you boys'll make just as impressive of a sound 522 00:37:48,975 --> 00:37:50,393 when I set your balls on fire. 523 00:37:53,479 --> 00:37:54,647 [chuckles softly] 524 00:37:54,730 --> 00:37:57,149 Or you could just tell me who the fuck y'all really are, 525 00:37:57,233 --> 00:37:58,401 and how the hell y'all found us. 526 00:37:58,484 --> 00:38:02,321 [Merlin] Look, for the last time, we have nothing to protect but our honor. 527 00:38:02,405 --> 00:38:05,241 So you can take your cheap horse piss that you call whiskey, 528 00:38:05,324 --> 00:38:07,034 which is spelled without an "E," 529 00:38:07,201 --> 00:38:09,328 and is nothing compared to a single malt Scotch, 530 00:38:09,495 --> 00:38:11,622 -and you can go fuck yourself. -[chuckles] 531 00:38:12,415 --> 00:38:13,916 [chuckles sarcastically] 532 00:38:14,583 --> 00:38:15,793 What about you? 533 00:38:15,876 --> 00:38:17,003 -Me? -Yeah. 534 00:38:17,086 --> 00:38:18,921 No, I love a Jack and Coke, bruv. 535 00:38:19,755 --> 00:38:22,591 But I do agree with the part where you go fuck yourself. 536 00:38:26,512 --> 00:38:27,555 All right. 537 00:38:27,638 --> 00:38:29,473 Y'all ain't got nothing to protect other than your honor. 538 00:38:31,183 --> 00:38:33,102 Let's see what happens when we change things up. 539 00:38:34,228 --> 00:38:36,689 [dramatic music playing] 540 00:38:41,277 --> 00:38:42,903 -Fuck me. -Harry? 541 00:38:42,987 --> 00:38:44,780 Y'all got three seconds to tell me the truth. 542 00:38:44,864 --> 00:38:45,865 [Merlin] Wait. No. 543 00:38:45,948 --> 00:38:47,158 -No! -Harry! 544 00:38:47,241 --> 00:38:49,076 He can't hear you. But I can, so talk. 545 00:38:49,201 --> 00:38:51,203 -No! -Get down, Harry! 546 00:38:51,370 --> 00:38:53,164 -[Merlin] Harry! Harry! -That's two. 547 00:38:53,247 --> 00:38:54,457 -Harry! -Harry! 548 00:38:54,623 --> 00:38:56,042 -[Eggsy] Harry! -Three. 549 00:38:56,125 --> 00:38:57,668 Stop! 550 00:38:58,544 --> 00:39:00,421 Their story checked out. 551 00:39:00,504 --> 00:39:03,758 I opened our doomsday scenario locker and that umbrella was in it. 552 00:39:04,508 --> 00:39:07,511 Kingsman. It's got our logo on it. 553 00:39:09,055 --> 00:39:10,097 I'm really sorry. 554 00:39:10,181 --> 00:39:12,933 [laughing] My apologies, boys. 555 00:39:13,017 --> 00:39:14,810 I hope there ain't no hard feelings. 556 00:39:14,894 --> 00:39:15,978 I was just doin' my job. 557 00:39:17,104 --> 00:39:20,608 Welcome to the Statesman, independent intelligence agency. 558 00:39:20,691 --> 00:39:21,901 Just like y'all, I reckon. 559 00:39:22,068 --> 00:39:24,028 But our founders went into the booze business. 560 00:39:24,111 --> 00:39:25,196 Thank the sweet Lord above. 561 00:39:25,905 --> 00:39:26,906 This is Ginger Ale. 562 00:39:26,989 --> 00:39:28,741 She's our strategy executive. 563 00:39:28,824 --> 00:39:29,825 Hello. 564 00:39:30,701 --> 00:39:32,161 I'm Agent Tequila. 565 00:39:32,953 --> 00:39:34,622 This is the part where you untie us. 566 00:39:38,334 --> 00:39:39,418 [Merlin] Thank you. 567 00:39:45,800 --> 00:39:46,801 Harry. 568 00:39:46,926 --> 00:39:48,260 -Hello. -Hello, mate. 569 00:39:53,349 --> 00:39:54,809 Harry. 570 00:39:54,892 --> 00:39:55,935 How do you do? 571 00:39:57,144 --> 00:39:58,145 Have we met before? 572 00:39:59,188 --> 00:40:02,358 Harry, it's okay. It's fine. They know that we know you. 573 00:40:03,484 --> 00:40:05,319 I think there must be some mistake. 574 00:40:06,028 --> 00:40:07,780 It's been such a long time, Harry. 575 00:40:08,697 --> 00:40:10,783 I need to get my brogues resoled. 576 00:40:11,909 --> 00:40:14,161 Yeah, and my oxfords are done in as well. 577 00:40:14,745 --> 00:40:16,872 Why are you telling me about your shoes? 578 00:40:22,044 --> 00:40:23,170 I'm a lepidopterist. 579 00:40:24,088 --> 00:40:25,423 You're a what? 580 00:40:25,506 --> 00:40:26,924 I study butterflies. 581 00:40:31,178 --> 00:40:34,348 [Merlin] Well, you wanted to be before you joined the army, but… 582 00:40:36,517 --> 00:40:37,852 Harry, look at me. 583 00:40:44,567 --> 00:40:45,776 It's good to see you. 584 00:40:46,944 --> 00:40:48,070 We'll be back soon. 585 00:40:48,154 --> 00:40:51,323 So these fellas right here are our doomsday protocol? 586 00:40:51,407 --> 00:40:54,326 Turns out, our founder's tailor was Kingsman. 587 00:40:57,204 --> 00:40:58,330 What have you done to him? 588 00:40:58,414 --> 00:41:00,708 Nothing. Only tried to help him. 589 00:41:00,791 --> 00:41:02,084 He's got retrograde amnesia. 590 00:41:02,168 --> 00:41:04,295 We knew from his eyeglasses that he was intelligence. 591 00:41:04,378 --> 00:41:05,421 We just didn't know whose. 592 00:41:06,797 --> 00:41:08,132 How did he get here? 593 00:41:10,676 --> 00:41:12,678 -[alarm blaring] -[Ginger] What the hell? 594 00:41:12,761 --> 00:41:15,139 Tequila, I'm getting a crazy spike 595 00:41:15,306 --> 00:41:17,766 of extreme low frequency waves 11 miles from here. 596 00:41:17,850 --> 00:41:19,518 I'm gonna need you to escort me there. 597 00:41:35,784 --> 00:41:38,162 [triumphant music playing] 598 00:41:47,838 --> 00:41:49,215 I need your alpha gel. 599 00:41:51,050 --> 00:41:52,635 [Tequila] I'll go check the church. 600 00:42:05,231 --> 00:42:06,649 [hissing] 601 00:42:07,525 --> 00:42:09,401 [Ginger] We developed our alpha gel technology 602 00:42:09,485 --> 00:42:10,736 for our own agents, 603 00:42:10,819 --> 00:42:12,488 in the event of a head shot. 604 00:42:12,571 --> 00:42:14,073 The gel protects the brain. 605 00:42:14,156 --> 00:42:19,328 Then, in the lab, we use nanites, micro-bots, to repair tissue damage. 606 00:42:26,001 --> 00:42:27,461 There are side effects. 607 00:42:27,545 --> 00:42:30,798 Partial amnesia, regression to the younger self. 608 00:42:30,881 --> 00:42:34,593 With no idea who he was, there was nothing we could do. 609 00:42:35,761 --> 00:42:37,846 But now you guys are here, 610 00:42:37,930 --> 00:42:40,140 there's a good chance we can bring him back. 611 00:42:51,735 --> 00:42:53,904 [sinister music playing] 612 00:43:08,460 --> 00:43:09,545 [Poppy] You're late. 613 00:43:09,628 --> 00:43:11,380 Why are you still wearing that? 614 00:43:11,463 --> 00:43:14,466 Until you get rid of the perimeter land mines, 615 00:43:15,050 --> 00:43:16,969 I'll keep wearing the suit, thank you very much. 616 00:43:17,303 --> 00:43:18,387 [Poppy] Scaredy-cat. 617 00:43:18,470 --> 00:43:19,847 Shut up and sit down. 618 00:43:19,930 --> 00:43:21,098 -Let's go! -[beeps] 619 00:43:24,143 --> 00:43:26,395 [Charlie] "Crocodile Rock," please. 620 00:43:28,230 --> 00:43:29,607 Fuck you! 621 00:43:30,316 --> 00:43:31,984 -[electricity crackling] -[groaning] 622 00:43:32,318 --> 00:43:35,404 Hey, hey, Elton, language. 623 00:43:35,904 --> 00:43:38,782 Okay, as fabulous as your catalogue is, 624 00:43:39,241 --> 00:43:41,660 I think I want to hear some Gershwin. 625 00:43:41,744 --> 00:43:42,745 [sighs] 626 00:43:42,828 --> 00:43:45,164 -[playing piano] -I still can't believe 627 00:43:45,247 --> 00:43:47,833 you got away with kidnapping Elton John. 628 00:43:47,916 --> 00:43:50,669 I know! But with Valentine abducting those celebrities, 629 00:43:50,753 --> 00:43:53,339 it seemed silly not to take advantage of the confusion. 630 00:43:55,132 --> 00:43:57,343 Shit. Has Elton got the blue rash? 631 00:44:00,679 --> 00:44:01,680 Lights. 632 00:44:01,764 --> 00:44:03,140 [piano playing stops] 633 00:44:03,682 --> 00:44:05,559 Hey, Elton. 634 00:44:05,643 --> 00:44:07,603 Have you been a bad boy again? 635 00:44:07,686 --> 00:44:08,687 Mmm-mmm. 636 00:44:08,771 --> 00:44:11,106 You're lying. Look at your hands. 637 00:44:14,860 --> 00:44:16,111 What is it? 638 00:44:16,195 --> 00:44:18,489 It's proof that my plan is gonna work. 639 00:44:19,198 --> 00:44:23,035 It's also the first sign of a slow and horrible death. 640 00:44:23,285 --> 00:44:24,620 [gasps] 641 00:44:25,037 --> 00:44:27,289 Don't worry, I can fix it. 642 00:44:27,456 --> 00:44:28,707 Tell me who you partied with. 643 00:44:30,667 --> 00:44:32,002 [sighs] 644 00:44:32,711 --> 00:44:34,171 It was Angel. 645 00:44:34,963 --> 00:44:38,217 Huh, not very angelic. 646 00:44:38,967 --> 00:44:40,511 Gonna have to clip his wings. 647 00:44:41,804 --> 00:44:43,013 [sighs] 648 00:44:53,649 --> 00:44:56,235 [uplifting music playing] 649 00:45:17,256 --> 00:45:18,924 Close the door behind you. 650 00:45:27,599 --> 00:45:29,935 [man] At what point are you going to start behaving 651 00:45:30,060 --> 00:45:31,728 like a Statesman, Tequila? 652 00:45:31,937 --> 00:45:34,314 You wanna go back to being a rodeo clown? 653 00:45:34,398 --> 00:45:36,275 No, sir. I apologize, sir. 654 00:45:38,610 --> 00:45:39,945 I'm Champagne. 655 00:45:40,696 --> 00:45:42,781 But anyone who knows what's good for him, 656 00:45:44,408 --> 00:45:45,784 calls me Champ. 657 00:45:46,785 --> 00:45:48,287 Sorry for your troubles. 658 00:45:49,288 --> 00:45:51,290 As your American cousins, 659 00:45:51,373 --> 00:45:53,041 I'm placing all of Statesman's 660 00:45:53,125 --> 00:45:56,128 considerably larger resources at your disposal. 661 00:45:58,881 --> 00:46:01,341 Can you imagine us in the clothing business? 662 00:46:01,467 --> 00:46:02,468 [chuckles] 663 00:46:05,053 --> 00:46:07,222 Now, how can I help you? 664 00:46:07,306 --> 00:46:09,141 [Eggsy] First of all, I've got to thank you 665 00:46:09,266 --> 00:46:10,601 for saving Agent Galahad. 666 00:46:10,684 --> 00:46:11,894 Wait. 667 00:46:11,977 --> 00:46:13,812 You said that you were Galahad. 668 00:46:13,896 --> 00:46:16,148 Oh, no, he's talking about the butterfly guy. 669 00:46:16,273 --> 00:46:17,858 -That used to be his handle. -Oh. 670 00:46:17,941 --> 00:46:20,360 [Eggsy] Galahad said, "Look at the bigger picture, 671 00:46:20,444 --> 00:46:21,945 ask 'why' as well as 'who'." 672 00:46:22,488 --> 00:46:24,490 So if someone wanted to take out Kingsman, 673 00:46:24,573 --> 00:46:26,492 then they've got to be planning something major. 674 00:46:26,575 --> 00:46:27,868 So what do you know? 675 00:46:27,951 --> 00:46:29,369 They're a drug cartel, we think. 676 00:46:29,453 --> 00:46:31,538 The name "Golden Circle" keeps coming up. 677 00:46:31,622 --> 00:46:34,208 Mmm. We'll look into them. What else? 678 00:46:34,291 --> 00:46:36,710 One of our former trainees is working with them. 679 00:46:36,793 --> 00:46:38,962 Charlie Hesketh. Total prick. 680 00:46:39,588 --> 00:46:41,590 You got any promising leads on him? 681 00:46:41,673 --> 00:46:42,841 His ex-girlfriend. 682 00:46:42,925 --> 00:46:45,177 I've been tracking her through social media. 683 00:46:45,928 --> 00:46:48,347 We believe she's still in contact with him. 684 00:46:49,431 --> 00:46:52,851 And she's going to Glastonbury Music Festival. 685 00:46:54,144 --> 00:46:55,521 Oh, good. 686 00:46:56,271 --> 00:46:58,398 Agent Tequila, break out your dancing shoes. 687 00:46:58,482 --> 00:46:59,733 You have a new mission. 688 00:46:59,816 --> 00:47:00,943 Yes, sir. 689 00:47:01,860 --> 00:47:02,861 [Champ] Hold up. 690 00:47:05,364 --> 00:47:06,573 You feeling okay? 691 00:47:06,657 --> 00:47:09,034 I'm a little tired, but fine, thanks. 692 00:47:09,451 --> 00:47:10,577 Galahad, you ready? 693 00:47:10,661 --> 00:47:11,745 [Champ] Your face… 694 00:47:11,828 --> 00:47:13,038 You got… 695 00:47:15,958 --> 00:47:17,251 What the fuck? 696 00:47:18,043 --> 00:47:19,545 [Champ] Oh, shit. 697 00:47:20,837 --> 00:47:22,047 Head to the sick bay. 698 00:47:22,130 --> 00:47:24,174 Have Ginger check you out. 699 00:47:24,800 --> 00:47:27,386 [whistles] Hey, give him your glasses. 700 00:47:31,723 --> 00:47:33,976 You're in luck, kid. Put 'em on. 701 00:47:35,310 --> 00:47:38,814 You get our finest senior agent to join you instead. 702 00:47:39,064 --> 00:47:41,483 Right now, he's in our New York office. 703 00:47:41,567 --> 00:47:44,069 Galahad, meet Agent Whiskey. 704 00:47:46,738 --> 00:47:47,739 [Whiskey] Kid, 705 00:47:48,240 --> 00:47:51,201 looks like we're hookin' up with a chick at a rock concert. 706 00:47:51,827 --> 00:47:53,829 My favorite kind of mission. 707 00:47:54,204 --> 00:47:56,248 I'm sending my jet to pick you up. 708 00:48:07,509 --> 00:48:09,886 [Ginger] We've dealt with this kind of amnesia before. 709 00:48:10,554 --> 00:48:13,849 Harry's like a computer that needs to be rebooted. 710 00:48:15,434 --> 00:48:19,187 We need to recreate a shock or trauma from his past 711 00:48:19,271 --> 00:48:20,439 to trigger his memory. 712 00:48:22,107 --> 00:48:23,275 [Merlin] I hope you're right. 713 00:48:27,863 --> 00:48:29,072 [gasps] 714 00:48:33,076 --> 00:48:34,494 Uh, excuse me. 715 00:48:34,578 --> 00:48:37,164 There seems to be some sort of a problem here. 716 00:48:37,247 --> 00:48:39,708 Help! Somebody! 717 00:48:39,791 --> 00:48:42,961 What the hell is going on? Help me! 718 00:48:45,964 --> 00:48:47,049 Help! 719 00:48:48,925 --> 00:48:49,968 Oh, God! 720 00:48:50,052 --> 00:48:52,220 Stop! Fuck! 721 00:49:13,492 --> 00:49:14,826 Get him out now. 722 00:49:14,910 --> 00:49:16,578 No, wait. His instincts are gonna kick in. 723 00:49:20,248 --> 00:49:21,750 [muffled yelling] 724 00:49:28,840 --> 00:49:30,342 No. I'm sorry to do this. 725 00:49:40,435 --> 00:49:42,187 [coughing] 726 00:49:45,482 --> 00:49:46,775 [gasping] 727 00:49:51,530 --> 00:49:53,490 -Are you okay? -What happened? 728 00:49:53,865 --> 00:49:56,159 Harry, you've forgotten who you are. 729 00:49:56,451 --> 00:49:58,662 We thought this might jog your memory. 730 00:49:59,871 --> 00:50:02,708 Look, when you were young, you had a choice. 731 00:50:03,041 --> 00:50:05,627 To either be a lepidopterist or to join the army. 732 00:50:05,711 --> 00:50:08,463 You chose the army. That led to Kingsman. 733 00:50:08,547 --> 00:50:11,466 You became a Kingsman agent. 734 00:50:11,550 --> 00:50:13,844 I doubt whether I'd work for anyone who drowns their employees. 735 00:50:14,970 --> 00:50:16,138 I want to go home. 736 00:50:16,388 --> 00:50:17,889 I want my butterfly collection. 737 00:50:19,224 --> 00:50:20,684 I want to see Mother. 738 00:50:22,352 --> 00:50:24,229 [Ginger] There's nothing more we can do. 739 00:50:25,731 --> 00:50:27,232 It's time to let him go. 740 00:50:37,075 --> 00:50:40,245 [Eggsy] I wish I could stay longer, but I've got to go on with this mission. 741 00:50:40,328 --> 00:50:41,580 Wait, wait, wait. 742 00:50:43,498 --> 00:50:45,751 Before you go, I wanna show you something. 743 00:50:48,211 --> 00:50:49,254 [Eggsy] Aw! 744 00:50:49,337 --> 00:50:53,049 I know he could never replace JB, but… 745 00:50:55,260 --> 00:50:57,429 Oh, my days. 746 00:50:57,512 --> 00:50:59,514 I hoped he might make you happy. 747 00:51:01,391 --> 00:51:02,476 [chuckles] 748 00:51:02,559 --> 00:51:05,061 And give you another reason to come back home soon. 749 00:51:05,937 --> 00:51:07,105 I love him. 750 00:51:07,439 --> 00:51:09,274 But I don't need another reason to come home. 751 00:51:12,110 --> 00:51:13,236 [horn blaring] 752 00:51:16,448 --> 00:51:19,618 I apologize. Just waiting for my friend. 753 00:51:20,368 --> 00:51:21,995 I'll be back as soon as I can, I promise. 754 00:51:23,914 --> 00:51:25,999 -Got to go save the world? -Yep. 755 00:51:26,082 --> 00:51:27,793 Well, if you save the world, 756 00:51:29,085 --> 00:51:30,712 you know what that means. 757 00:51:30,796 --> 00:51:32,380 Yeah, all right. 758 00:51:35,717 --> 00:51:36,718 Bye, buddy. 759 00:51:43,225 --> 00:51:44,643 Got the passes from my contact. 760 00:51:45,727 --> 00:51:47,437 You're gonna love Glastonbury. 761 00:51:48,605 --> 00:51:50,565 Well, that's the easy part, kid. 762 00:51:50,649 --> 00:51:52,484 Take a look in the glove box. 763 00:51:56,988 --> 00:51:58,365 [Eggsy] Fucking hell, bruv. 764 00:51:58,448 --> 00:52:00,992 Thought everything was supposed to be bigger in America. 765 00:52:01,076 --> 00:52:03,245 Is this why you overcompensate with these cars? 766 00:52:03,328 --> 00:52:04,329 Goes on your finger. 767 00:52:04,913 --> 00:52:06,540 The surveillance tracker is in the tip. 768 00:52:06,623 --> 00:52:09,751 Apply light pressure for three seconds to release it. 769 00:52:09,835 --> 00:52:11,711 -[crowd cheering] -[rock music playing] 770 00:52:15,924 --> 00:52:18,343 [Eggsy] Okay, so according to her Instagram feed, 771 00:52:18,426 --> 00:52:21,346 Charlie's ex-girlfriend is up ahead at the VIP bar. 772 00:52:21,429 --> 00:52:23,139 Which one of us is gonna plant the tracker? 773 00:52:23,265 --> 00:52:24,432 Bands, boys. 774 00:52:25,350 --> 00:52:26,351 Yeah, that's fine. 775 00:52:27,435 --> 00:52:29,271 [Whiskey] I say we both make an approach. 776 00:52:30,105 --> 00:52:32,190 Whoever gets on best, goes for it. 777 00:52:32,274 --> 00:52:33,733 It doesn't have to be a competition. 778 00:52:33,817 --> 00:52:34,860 Why don't we just go up to her, 779 00:52:35,026 --> 00:52:38,113 shake her hand, pat her on the back, whatever, you know. Job done. 780 00:52:38,655 --> 00:52:41,575 The hand is not a mucous membrane, Eggsy. 781 00:52:41,658 --> 00:52:43,034 Neither is the back. 782 00:52:43,869 --> 00:52:45,579 They teach you anything at Kingsman? 783 00:52:45,662 --> 00:52:47,122 What are you talking about? 784 00:52:47,205 --> 00:52:49,791 Our trackers are designed to enter the bloodstream. 785 00:52:49,875 --> 00:52:53,044 They circulate harmlessly, providing full audio and GPS. 786 00:52:53,128 --> 00:52:54,296 [Eggsy] Mucus membrane. 787 00:52:54,379 --> 00:52:56,047 That's like up the nose, isn't it? 788 00:52:56,214 --> 00:52:57,883 What the fuck am I gonna do? Stick my finger… 789 00:53:02,012 --> 00:53:03,972 It's not just inside the nose, is it? 790 00:53:04,055 --> 00:53:06,308 -No, Eggsy, it ain't. -Fuck. 791 00:53:07,058 --> 00:53:08,560 All right, I'll take the first crack. 792 00:53:08,894 --> 00:53:10,312 Watch and learn, buddy. 793 00:53:10,437 --> 00:53:11,855 [scoffs] 794 00:53:13,398 --> 00:53:14,649 Good luck. 795 00:53:20,655 --> 00:53:22,490 -Here you go, ma'am. -Thank you. 796 00:53:22,574 --> 00:53:23,575 Miss, I beg your pardon. 797 00:53:23,700 --> 00:53:25,160 Now, I don't wanna pester you, 798 00:53:25,243 --> 00:53:27,746 but I just have to know, what time are you playing? 799 00:53:28,914 --> 00:53:30,248 I'm not in a band. 800 00:53:30,749 --> 00:53:32,083 Oh, God. Who did you think I was? 801 00:53:32,167 --> 00:53:33,627 Please don't say someone ghastly. 802 00:53:33,710 --> 00:53:35,253 God damn it, now I feel like a fool. 803 00:53:36,338 --> 00:53:39,841 I just assumed that a woman with your charisma, 804 00:53:40,842 --> 00:53:42,677 well, she just had to be somebody. 805 00:53:42,761 --> 00:53:43,929 Right. 806 00:53:44,554 --> 00:53:45,680 Thank you. 807 00:53:45,764 --> 00:53:48,475 No, it's okay. I know you didn't mean to make me feel like a dumbass. 808 00:53:48,558 --> 00:53:51,436 So I'll let you make it up to me by letting me buy you a drink. 809 00:53:52,270 --> 00:53:53,438 Follow my finger. 810 00:53:58,068 --> 00:54:00,028 [chuckles] What are we doing? 811 00:54:00,445 --> 00:54:02,155 Swiping to the left. 812 00:54:02,238 --> 00:54:04,324 What, you don't do Tinder in America? 813 00:54:04,407 --> 00:54:05,533 Tinder what? 814 00:54:05,617 --> 00:54:08,411 Do you know, I think it's probably a generational thing. 815 00:54:08,912 --> 00:54:11,623 It translates as, "Go away, old man." 816 00:54:15,126 --> 00:54:16,127 Be good, be cool. 817 00:54:16,711 --> 00:54:17,796 Bye. 818 00:54:19,297 --> 00:54:21,049 Thank you for that. 819 00:54:21,132 --> 00:54:22,968 -I'm Clara. -River. 820 00:54:23,385 --> 00:54:25,470 Bloody hell, is that the time? 821 00:54:26,388 --> 00:54:28,765 You know what, I'm so jetlagged, I don't know if I'm coming or going. 822 00:54:29,474 --> 00:54:31,184 Where've you been? Anywhere nice? 823 00:54:31,267 --> 00:54:34,312 South America. Been spending a bit of time out there. 824 00:54:34,396 --> 00:54:35,480 Training with the shaman, 825 00:54:35,563 --> 00:54:37,732 and trying to really connect with my spirit animal. 826 00:54:37,816 --> 00:54:39,901 -Yeah. -I'm a crow. 827 00:54:39,985 --> 00:54:41,569 And, hang on, let me guess… 828 00:54:41,653 --> 00:54:43,405 -No. -Jaguar. 829 00:54:43,488 --> 00:54:45,573 What? No! Oh, my God! 830 00:54:45,657 --> 00:54:47,701 -Yes? -How did you even know that? 831 00:54:47,784 --> 00:54:50,328 Look, it totally is. Check it out. 832 00:54:50,412 --> 00:54:53,081 Oh. Ino Moxo. Black jaguar. Very nice. 833 00:54:53,164 --> 00:54:56,167 You know what? I wanna buy you a drink. 834 00:54:58,503 --> 00:55:00,296 [indistinct chatter] 835 00:55:05,010 --> 00:55:06,678 [Merlin] Eggsy sent this from Glastonbury. 836 00:55:09,014 --> 00:55:11,433 And #bluerash is trending on Twitter. 837 00:55:12,517 --> 00:55:14,853 Have you found any correlation between these cases? 838 00:55:14,936 --> 00:55:16,771 Only recreational drug use. 839 00:55:16,855 --> 00:55:17,856 Ah. 840 00:55:19,274 --> 00:55:21,192 I know. Not very Statesman-like. 841 00:55:21,860 --> 00:55:22,986 Tequila here, 842 00:55:23,778 --> 00:55:26,322 he is our resident bad boy. 843 00:55:27,032 --> 00:55:30,618 You don't think this could be related to The Golden Circle, do you? 844 00:55:30,702 --> 00:55:34,205 A drug cartel poisoning its customers? 845 00:55:34,622 --> 00:55:35,707 Doesn't make sense. 846 00:55:36,166 --> 00:55:37,375 Mmm. 847 00:55:42,881 --> 00:55:44,841 [Charlie] Poppy, would you pass the sugar, please? 848 00:55:45,508 --> 00:55:46,843 [Poppy] Okay. 849 00:55:47,135 --> 00:55:50,346 But it's really bad for you. 850 00:55:51,097 --> 00:55:54,059 Eight times more addictive than cocaine. 851 00:55:54,142 --> 00:55:56,644 Five times more likely to cause death. 852 00:55:56,728 --> 00:56:00,398 But it's legal, so, you go ahead. Knock yourself out. 853 00:56:02,067 --> 00:56:05,153 Don't get me started on tobacco and alcohol. 854 00:56:05,236 --> 00:56:07,489 Peddle that stuff and you're in Fortune 500. 855 00:56:07,572 --> 00:56:09,074 But me? No! 856 00:56:09,157 --> 00:56:13,244 I'm out here hiding in the middle of nowhere. Homesick. 857 00:56:13,328 --> 00:56:14,662 Because I sell drugs. 858 00:56:14,829 --> 00:56:18,124 Oh, Pops. You're doing this because you're homesick? 859 00:56:18,208 --> 00:56:19,834 [Poppy] Yes. 860 00:56:19,918 --> 00:56:22,170 I want freedom. 861 00:56:22,253 --> 00:56:24,339 I want fame. 862 00:56:24,422 --> 00:56:27,634 Our profits were $250 billion last year. 863 00:56:27,717 --> 00:56:31,179 I am the most successful businesswoman in the world, but nobody knows who I am. 864 00:56:31,262 --> 00:56:32,430 Pops, Pops. 865 00:56:32,514 --> 00:56:34,349 It's not long now, eh? 866 00:56:34,432 --> 00:56:36,351 You're right, thank you. 867 00:56:36,434 --> 00:56:37,852 [Angel] Sorry to interrupt you. 868 00:56:37,936 --> 00:56:40,438 You wanted to see me, Madam Poppy? 869 00:56:40,522 --> 00:56:43,525 Yes, Angel. In The Golden Circle, 870 00:56:43,608 --> 00:56:45,735 we do not sample the merchandise, 871 00:56:45,819 --> 00:56:48,822 and we do not break the rules. 872 00:56:48,905 --> 00:56:51,533 Which is why I have invested in robots 873 00:56:51,616 --> 00:56:56,204 because they are so much more reliable and trustworthy than human beings. 874 00:56:57,122 --> 00:56:58,289 [whistles] 875 00:57:01,751 --> 00:57:03,128 [panting] 876 00:57:04,462 --> 00:57:05,463 Oh! 877 00:57:09,759 --> 00:57:11,386 [yelling] 878 00:57:12,971 --> 00:57:14,389 [screaming] 879 00:57:25,984 --> 00:57:27,652 Oh! Oh, no. Whoa! Whoa! 880 00:57:37,328 --> 00:57:38,955 [sighs] 881 00:57:39,664 --> 00:57:42,333 -[crowd cheering] -[rock music playing] 882 00:57:44,919 --> 00:57:46,671 [Clara] Sorry we never found your friends. 883 00:57:47,422 --> 00:57:49,382 Well, we all go on our separate journeys, 884 00:57:49,466 --> 00:57:52,719 but, ultimately, we'll all arrive at the same destination. 885 00:57:52,802 --> 00:57:55,346 Shall we check my tent? See if they're there? 886 00:57:55,847 --> 00:57:57,974 -Uh… Yeah. -Oh, come on. 887 00:58:03,021 --> 00:58:04,355 Wow. 888 00:58:04,689 --> 00:58:06,274 This is amazing. 889 00:58:07,817 --> 00:58:08,860 Come on. 890 00:58:08,943 --> 00:58:12,405 Uh, you know what, I'm busting for a pee, actually. [chuckles] 891 00:58:12,489 --> 00:58:14,115 You could do it on me if you want. 892 00:58:14,866 --> 00:58:15,992 Uh… 893 00:58:16,701 --> 00:58:17,994 Maybe in a bit. 894 00:58:18,870 --> 00:58:19,954 Give me a sec, yeah? 895 00:58:20,538 --> 00:58:22,874 Okay, but hurry up, River. 896 00:58:23,208 --> 00:58:25,877 Been waiting all night for you to at least kiss me. 897 00:58:27,212 --> 00:58:28,463 [chuckles] 898 00:58:29,214 --> 00:58:31,049 [cell phone ringing] 899 00:58:32,842 --> 00:58:33,843 Hey! 900 00:58:33,927 --> 00:58:35,970 [Eggsy] Hi, babe. Uh, bit of a nightmare. 901 00:58:37,013 --> 00:58:38,056 I've got to sleep with a target, 902 00:58:38,223 --> 00:58:40,892 but I won't do it, unless you agree that it's all right. 903 00:58:41,142 --> 00:58:43,061 You've got to be fucking kidding. 904 00:58:43,561 --> 00:58:45,563 What was I, target practice? 905 00:58:45,647 --> 00:58:47,982 Babe, surely it's better that I'm honest with you, 906 00:58:48,066 --> 00:58:49,859 rather than me doing it and not telling you. 907 00:58:49,943 --> 00:58:52,487 Kind of got a bit of a "save the world" situation here. 908 00:58:52,570 --> 00:58:55,740 How the fuck is screwing someone gonna save the world? 909 00:58:56,241 --> 00:58:58,076 Well, it's a bit complicated, 910 00:58:58,159 --> 00:59:00,787 but trust me, I would not be doing it if I didn't have to. 911 00:59:04,249 --> 00:59:06,501 Babe, please believe me. I love you. 912 00:59:06,584 --> 00:59:08,920 You are the person I wanna spend the rest of my life with. 913 00:59:11,047 --> 00:59:12,131 Is that a proposal? 914 00:59:14,425 --> 00:59:15,510 Um… 915 00:59:15,593 --> 00:59:17,428 Because I think I'd give you my permission. 916 00:59:17,762 --> 00:59:20,598 Having that security, knowing that we were committed… 917 00:59:21,558 --> 00:59:24,269 In that context, yeah. Yeah, I'd feel different. 918 00:59:25,353 --> 00:59:27,272 Right. Well, I mean… 919 00:59:27,355 --> 00:59:30,024 I want to be with you, but being a public figure, babe, 920 00:59:30,108 --> 00:59:31,401 like a prince… 921 00:59:32,402 --> 00:59:34,779 It's a bit of a factor, you know, what with my job and stuff. 922 00:59:36,573 --> 00:59:38,199 Oh, no, no, no, come on. Okay. 923 00:59:38,283 --> 00:59:40,827 Uh, look, we need to talk about this properly. 924 00:59:40,910 --> 00:59:42,787 Just give me five minutes, okay? 925 00:59:43,913 --> 00:59:45,790 Don't put yourself down, Eggsy. 926 00:59:46,582 --> 00:59:48,626 I'm sure you can last longer than that. 927 00:59:54,632 --> 00:59:55,967 [sighs] 928 01:00:03,808 --> 01:00:05,143 [flushes] 929 01:00:15,153 --> 01:00:17,155 -What's the matter? -Nothing. 930 01:00:17,780 --> 01:00:20,867 I just feel that our spirit animals need more time to get in sync, 931 01:00:20,950 --> 01:00:24,078 and find a harmonious bond on the spiritual plane. 932 01:00:24,162 --> 01:00:25,413 Totally. 933 01:00:25,496 --> 01:00:26,914 Yeah? 934 01:00:26,998 --> 01:00:29,334 Or we could just… 935 01:00:30,668 --> 01:00:31,836 Fuck? 936 01:00:37,800 --> 01:00:38,926 Clara, I don't think I can. 937 01:00:48,936 --> 01:00:49,979 But you know what? 938 01:00:50,855 --> 01:00:53,191 My crow is looking for a place to nest. 939 01:01:37,235 --> 01:01:38,403 [Merlin] Good work, Eggsy! 940 01:01:38,486 --> 01:01:41,364 -Tracker fully functional. -[Clara moaning on speakers] 941 01:01:42,198 --> 01:01:44,742 Don't worry, I've been through this with Whiskey before. 942 01:01:46,035 --> 01:01:48,246 Nice to be working with an agent who knows what he's doing. 943 01:01:49,038 --> 01:01:50,081 [sighs] 944 01:01:50,415 --> 01:01:53,668 [Clara] Wow, Mr. Crow. My turn. 945 01:01:53,751 --> 01:01:55,586 [Eggsy] I'm sorry. I can't. 946 01:01:55,670 --> 01:01:56,963 I'm in a relationship. 947 01:01:57,046 --> 01:01:59,382 That's adorable. Listen, so am I. 948 01:01:59,507 --> 01:02:02,927 What happens at Glasto, stays in Glasto. 949 01:02:03,720 --> 01:02:04,762 I can't. 950 01:02:05,346 --> 01:02:06,431 Bye, Clara. 951 01:02:10,852 --> 01:02:11,936 [line ringing] 952 01:02:12,019 --> 01:02:14,480 [on voicemail] This is Princess T, please leave a message. 953 01:02:16,732 --> 01:02:17,859 [man on phone] Motor Manor Hotel… 954 01:02:17,942 --> 01:02:19,569 Yeah, can you put me through to Princess Tilde, please. 955 01:02:20,445 --> 01:02:23,030 Oh, actually, sir, I'm just looking at my computer 956 01:02:23,114 --> 01:02:25,700 and I'm afraid that the princess is already checked out. 957 01:02:25,783 --> 01:02:26,784 [Eggsy] Thank you. 958 01:02:29,620 --> 01:02:30,621 Fuck! 959 01:02:57,815 --> 01:02:58,816 Harry. 960 01:03:01,152 --> 01:03:03,154 -What's going on? -I was just packing. 961 01:03:03,571 --> 01:03:06,908 Look at these lovely toiletries Merlin very kindly gave me as a leaving present. 962 01:03:06,991 --> 01:03:08,034 Here, try this aftershave. 963 01:03:09,494 --> 01:03:10,870 Yeah, I know, Harry. I'm wearing it. 964 01:03:13,998 --> 01:03:15,208 Listen, you can't just give up. 965 01:03:16,459 --> 01:03:17,877 Give up? 966 01:03:17,960 --> 01:03:20,797 No, on the contrary. I'm about to achieve my dream. 967 01:03:20,880 --> 01:03:22,131 Researching rare butterflies 968 01:03:22,215 --> 01:03:24,509 alongside some of the finest minds in entomology. 969 01:03:34,393 --> 01:03:36,812 You know, you may as well have me stuck up on this wall. 970 01:03:38,231 --> 01:03:41,442 'Cause you're never gonna find a butterfly more interesting than me. 971 01:03:41,526 --> 01:03:42,610 Sorry? 972 01:03:43,236 --> 01:03:47,240 When you and I first met, I was just, like, a maggot. 973 01:03:47,323 --> 01:03:48,407 Maggots turn into flies. 974 01:03:48,533 --> 01:03:50,243 Perhaps you mean larva. 975 01:03:50,326 --> 01:03:54,121 Larva, yeah, okay. Whatever. The point is everyone wanted to squash me. 976 01:03:55,414 --> 01:03:56,415 But not you. 977 01:03:56,916 --> 01:03:59,961 You helped me to become a caterpillar. 978 01:04:00,044 --> 01:04:01,546 And now I've got wings. 979 01:04:02,755 --> 01:04:06,551 I'm flying higher than I ever dreamed and that is all thanks to you. 980 01:04:06,634 --> 01:04:08,386 I hate to seem rude, but I need to finish packing 981 01:04:08,469 --> 01:04:09,637 and get some sleep. 982 01:04:09,720 --> 01:04:11,097 Harry, you can't just walk away. 983 01:04:11,222 --> 01:04:12,682 Kingsman needs you. 984 01:04:12,765 --> 01:04:14,892 The whole world needs you. 985 01:04:17,895 --> 01:04:19,355 I need you. 986 01:04:20,439 --> 01:04:24,902 Eggy, whoever the Harry was that you knew, he's gone, I'm afraid. 987 01:04:25,361 --> 01:04:26,445 Goodbye. 988 01:05:02,857 --> 01:05:05,109 [slow country music playing on speakers] 989 01:05:05,610 --> 01:05:06,944 That's not a martini. 990 01:05:07,028 --> 01:05:08,904 It is in Kentucky. 991 01:05:08,988 --> 01:05:09,989 Fair enough. 992 01:05:18,623 --> 01:05:19,832 [Harry] Here's to you, Eggsy. 993 01:05:19,915 --> 01:05:22,168 You're exactly what Kingsman needs. 994 01:05:31,344 --> 01:05:32,595 [line ringing] 995 01:05:33,012 --> 01:05:35,640 [on voicemail] This is Princess T. Please leave a message. 996 01:05:39,352 --> 01:05:40,937 Can I have another martini, please? 997 01:05:41,020 --> 01:05:42,355 Sure. 998 01:05:43,356 --> 01:05:44,440 Thanks. 999 01:05:50,738 --> 01:05:52,448 [cell phone chimes] 1000 01:05:58,454 --> 01:05:59,580 [scoffs] Give up. 1001 01:06:08,547 --> 01:06:09,715 [chuckles] 1002 01:06:24,939 --> 01:06:27,441 [music swells] 1003 01:06:34,490 --> 01:06:35,950 You know what? 1004 01:06:36,033 --> 01:06:38,244 That was the best martini I've ever had. 1005 01:06:39,412 --> 01:06:40,746 Keep the change. 1006 01:06:40,913 --> 01:06:41,997 Thanks. 1007 01:06:45,793 --> 01:06:46,836 [whimpers] 1008 01:06:56,887 --> 01:06:58,097 [Eggsy] It's all right. Don't panic. 1009 01:06:58,180 --> 01:07:00,683 Just thought I'd bring you a little leaving present. 1010 01:07:06,397 --> 01:07:07,606 What do you think? He's lovely, isn't he? 1011 01:07:07,690 --> 01:07:08,858 [chuckles] 1012 01:07:08,941 --> 01:07:10,359 Would you like to hold him? 1013 01:07:13,446 --> 01:07:14,655 Hello. 1014 01:07:23,789 --> 01:07:25,416 Do you think I should shoot him? 1015 01:07:26,125 --> 01:07:28,419 -Are you quite mad? -What? What's the problem? 1016 01:07:28,502 --> 01:07:30,588 -No! You can't! -Eh? What? 1017 01:07:30,671 --> 01:07:32,548 -No, you'll have to shoot me! -Shoot you? 1018 01:07:32,673 --> 01:07:33,799 Well, I will shoot you. 1019 01:07:33,883 --> 01:07:35,176 No. No one's sick enough to shoot a puppy! 1020 01:07:35,259 --> 01:07:36,260 Well, what about you, Harry? 1021 01:07:36,343 --> 01:07:37,553 You were sick enough to shoot a puppy! 1022 01:07:37,636 --> 01:07:38,763 Do you remember? 1023 01:07:39,680 --> 01:07:41,390 [heavy breathing] 1024 01:07:43,434 --> 01:07:44,518 [gasps] 1025 01:08:01,410 --> 01:08:03,078 [Eggsy] You were sick enough to shoot a puppy! 1026 01:08:31,190 --> 01:08:32,983 -It was a blank. -Yes, Harry. Yes! 1027 01:08:33,150 --> 01:08:34,193 It was a fucking blank! 1028 01:08:34,276 --> 01:08:35,277 That's right. It was a blank! 1029 01:08:35,361 --> 01:08:36,654 I would never hurt Mr. Pickle! 1030 01:08:36,737 --> 01:08:38,489 -Yes, Harry! -He lived to a ripe old age! 1031 01:08:38,572 --> 01:08:39,907 He died of pancreatitis! 1032 01:08:46,121 --> 01:08:47,748 You're not Mr. Pickle. 1033 01:08:55,005 --> 01:08:55,840 Eggsy. 1034 01:08:57,967 --> 01:08:59,135 Hello, Harry. 1035 01:09:11,897 --> 01:09:13,315 Eggsy. 1036 01:09:18,571 --> 01:09:20,197 -Valentine has to be stopped. -No, I know. 1037 01:09:20,281 --> 01:09:21,490 -He has a device. -It's all right. 1038 01:09:21,574 --> 01:09:23,325 It's sorted. Don't worry. 1039 01:09:23,409 --> 01:09:25,202 We got a lot of catching up to do. 1040 01:09:26,162 --> 01:09:27,580 Well, well. 1041 01:09:28,455 --> 01:09:30,499 I suppose I should cancel that taxi. 1042 01:09:31,375 --> 01:09:32,585 [Harry] Yes. 1043 01:09:32,668 --> 01:09:34,044 If you don't mind… 1044 01:09:35,713 --> 01:09:36,964 Merlin. 1045 01:09:38,799 --> 01:09:40,009 Welcome back… 1046 01:09:40,885 --> 01:09:42,011 Galahad. 1047 01:09:46,932 --> 01:09:48,809 [Eggsy] Now that we've finished the debrief, Harry, 1048 01:09:48,893 --> 01:09:50,352 here's a couple of welcome back gifts. 1049 01:09:50,436 --> 01:09:51,312 First up, 1050 01:09:52,354 --> 01:09:54,189 a brand-new Kingsman watch. 1051 01:09:54,356 --> 01:09:55,441 Advanced software, 1052 01:09:55,524 --> 01:09:57,526 it can hack into anything with a microchip. 1053 01:09:57,693 --> 01:09:58,777 It is the bollocks. 1054 01:09:58,903 --> 01:09:59,820 And Merlin… 1055 01:10:00,571 --> 01:10:01,572 [Merlin] I made you these. 1056 01:10:05,117 --> 01:10:06,243 A-ha. 1057 01:10:24,678 --> 01:10:27,097 Thank you, Merlin, Eggsy. 1058 01:10:27,181 --> 01:10:29,266 -How do I look? -You look… 1059 01:10:29,350 --> 01:10:33,103 Like some faggot lookin' for an eye fuckin'. 1060 01:10:34,813 --> 01:10:36,065 Now, 1061 01:10:36,148 --> 01:10:38,817 why don't you get out of our bar 1062 01:10:39,485 --> 01:10:41,487 before I take out your other one? 1063 01:10:42,404 --> 01:10:46,033 Now, is that any way to welcome a visitor from out of town, moonshine? 1064 01:10:46,116 --> 01:10:47,368 Okay. 1065 01:10:48,827 --> 01:10:51,121 Suck my southern dick, 1066 01:10:51,372 --> 01:10:52,414 bitch. 1067 01:10:53,249 --> 01:10:55,542 Oh, I don't think that'll be necessary. 1068 01:10:56,877 --> 01:10:58,295 Good day, sir. 1069 01:11:02,549 --> 01:11:04,218 Well? 1070 01:11:04,301 --> 01:11:06,095 What are you ladies waitin' for? 1071 01:11:06,553 --> 01:11:07,930 Manners… 1072 01:11:09,598 --> 01:11:10,724 Maketh… 1073 01:11:13,394 --> 01:11:14,645 Man. 1074 01:11:16,397 --> 01:11:17,982 Do you know what that means? 1075 01:11:20,234 --> 01:11:22,152 Then let me teach you a lesson. 1076 01:11:32,705 --> 01:11:34,540 Are we going to stand around here all day? 1077 01:11:34,623 --> 01:11:35,833 -Or are we going to… -[grunts] 1078 01:11:35,916 --> 01:11:37,543 [glass shatters] 1079 01:11:37,626 --> 01:11:39,336 -[man] You big… -[men whooping] 1080 01:11:40,337 --> 01:11:41,964 [grunting] 1081 01:11:51,056 --> 01:11:52,182 [groans] 1082 01:11:57,688 --> 01:11:59,064 Well, pick him up. 1083 01:11:59,648 --> 01:12:02,985 Now, that is not what I call a Kentucky welcome. 1084 01:12:05,029 --> 01:12:08,198 Manners maketh man. 1085 01:12:09,241 --> 01:12:10,492 Let me translate that for you. 1086 01:12:13,078 --> 01:12:14,538 [grunting] 1087 01:12:30,512 --> 01:12:31,638 What's wrong with me, Merlin? 1088 01:12:31,722 --> 01:12:32,848 I thought you fixed me? 1089 01:12:32,973 --> 01:12:35,267 Well, we rebuilt your neural pathways. 1090 01:12:35,351 --> 01:12:37,436 But it'll take time to get your coordination back. 1091 01:12:37,519 --> 01:12:39,021 [screams and groans] 1092 01:12:44,234 --> 01:12:45,235 [whip cracks] 1093 01:12:58,207 --> 01:12:59,958 And the phantom butterflies? 1094 01:13:00,042 --> 01:13:02,920 You will experience episodes, lapses of clarity. 1095 01:13:03,045 --> 01:13:04,922 You'll be back to normal soon. 1096 01:13:05,672 --> 01:13:07,591 [grunting] 1097 01:13:20,062 --> 01:13:21,230 Whoo. 1098 01:13:22,356 --> 01:13:24,316 I feel like a tornado in a trailer park. 1099 01:13:24,775 --> 01:13:29,029 [choir singing on TV] ♪ Golden Circle proudly presents ♪ 1100 01:13:29,696 --> 01:13:32,533 Mr. President, my name is Poppy Adams. 1101 01:13:32,699 --> 01:13:35,202 I believe the UN has no teeth. 1102 01:13:35,285 --> 01:13:37,704 So I've selected you, as leader of the free world, 1103 01:13:37,788 --> 01:13:38,997 to receive this communication. 1104 01:13:39,665 --> 01:13:41,458 And I invite you to begin negotiations 1105 01:13:41,542 --> 01:13:45,295 on the largest scale hostage situation in history. 1106 01:13:45,379 --> 01:13:46,588 A few weeks ago, 1107 01:13:46,672 --> 01:13:51,093 an engineered virus was released, contained in all varieties of my product. 1108 01:13:51,510 --> 01:13:57,141 Cannabis, cocaine, heroin, opium, ecstasy and crystal meth. 1109 01:13:58,475 --> 01:14:01,228 Some of you are already infected. 1110 01:14:01,311 --> 01:14:04,481 And this is what you can expect in the coming days. 1111 01:14:05,357 --> 01:14:10,028 After a brief incubation period, victims present with stage one symptoms. 1112 01:14:10,112 --> 01:14:11,447 [snaps fingers] 1113 01:14:11,530 --> 01:14:12,531 A blue rash. 1114 01:14:13,699 --> 01:14:14,783 Next… 1115 01:14:14,867 --> 01:14:16,827 Second stage symptoms appear. 1116 01:14:16,910 --> 01:14:18,579 [snaps fingers] Mania… 1117 01:14:18,662 --> 01:14:20,372 As the virus enters the brain. 1118 01:14:20,456 --> 01:14:24,376 [whispers] Very distressing to the victim and those around them. 1119 01:14:25,586 --> 01:14:26,712 Stage three… [snaps fingers] 1120 01:14:28,172 --> 01:14:29,423 -[gasping] -Paralysis. 1121 01:14:29,506 --> 01:14:32,301 Muscles enter a state of catastrophic seizure. 1122 01:14:32,384 --> 01:14:34,428 And once the muscles of the thorax become affected, 1123 01:14:35,262 --> 01:14:37,681 breathing becomes impossible 1124 01:14:37,764 --> 01:14:41,935 leading to a very nasty death within 12 hours. 1125 01:14:43,103 --> 01:14:49,151 But I have good news to the millions already affected. 1126 01:14:49,234 --> 01:14:50,777 It doesn't have to be this way. 1127 01:14:50,903 --> 01:14:53,906 I have an antidote. 1128 01:14:54,031 --> 01:14:55,240 [snaps fingers] 1129 01:15:09,004 --> 01:15:12,049 What have you done to me, you fucking bitch? 1130 01:15:14,176 --> 01:15:15,802 -[sighs] -100% effective, 1131 01:15:15,886 --> 01:15:19,306 and ready to ship out worldwide at a moment's notice. 1132 01:15:19,389 --> 01:15:21,350 -Get out of my room! -You have my word. 1133 01:15:21,433 --> 01:15:23,227 -Get out! -I will do this, 1134 01:15:23,310 --> 01:15:26,730 if the following conditions are met. 1135 01:15:26,813 --> 01:15:29,316 Get out of my fucking room! 1136 01:15:30,692 --> 01:15:34,988 First, you agree to end the war on drugs, once and for all. 1137 01:15:35,072 --> 01:15:37,658 All classes of substance are legalized, 1138 01:15:37,741 --> 01:15:39,660 paving the way to a new marketplace 1139 01:15:39,743 --> 01:15:43,997 in which sales are regulated and taxed as per alcohol. 1140 01:15:44,122 --> 01:15:49,002 And second, my colleagues and I receive full legal immunity. 1141 01:15:49,586 --> 01:15:50,712 Meet my terms 1142 01:15:50,796 --> 01:15:53,465 and I look forward to helping you keep our beloved country great, 1143 01:15:54,174 --> 01:15:58,512 boosting our ailing economy, and easing spending on law enforcement. 1144 01:15:58,595 --> 01:16:00,973 Or continue this blinkered, outmoded, 1145 01:16:01,139 --> 01:16:04,935 and, frankly, disastrous exercise in prohibition, 1146 01:16:05,018 --> 01:16:07,104 and live with blood on your hands. 1147 01:16:08,188 --> 01:16:10,607 Save lives. Legalize. 1148 01:16:16,530 --> 01:16:18,407 I told you that shit was no good for you. 1149 01:16:28,125 --> 01:16:29,835 [news anchor] Who is Poppy Adams? 1150 01:16:29,918 --> 01:16:31,545 After graduating Harvard Business School, 1151 01:16:31,628 --> 01:16:34,881 Adams was briefly held for serious mental health issues 1152 01:16:34,965 --> 01:16:36,967 before disappearing without a trace. 1153 01:16:37,050 --> 01:16:39,594 Intelligent, ambitious, ruthless, 1154 01:16:39,678 --> 01:16:43,265 lacks empathy, superficial charm. 1155 01:16:43,348 --> 01:16:46,351 All the elements of a great CEO. 1156 01:16:46,893 --> 01:16:49,146 Or a psychopath. 1157 01:16:49,229 --> 01:16:51,857 Following the broadcast of Adams's message to the president, 1158 01:16:51,940 --> 01:16:54,109 there were scenes of chaos today 1159 01:16:54,192 --> 01:16:56,737 at medical centers across the country and around the world. 1160 01:16:56,820 --> 01:16:58,155 [doctor] We have no more beds available. 1161 01:16:58,238 --> 01:17:00,449 The hospital is at full capacity. 1162 01:17:01,366 --> 01:17:04,161 The blue rash is now being renamed "The Dancing Disease," 1163 01:17:04,244 --> 01:17:07,289 as victims begin to exhibit stage two symptoms. 1164 01:17:13,295 --> 01:17:14,755 Let's prep the cryo unit. 1165 01:17:15,255 --> 01:17:16,298 [Merlin] You want to freeze him? 1166 01:17:16,423 --> 01:17:17,841 [Ginger] Exactly. 1167 01:17:17,924 --> 01:17:21,845 [news anchor 1] Victims of the virus caused by contaminated recreational drugs 1168 01:17:21,928 --> 01:17:25,474 flooded hospitals and clinics in fear for their lives. 1169 01:17:25,557 --> 01:17:27,017 [clamoring] 1170 01:17:28,727 --> 01:17:30,228 [news anchor 2] Curfews and no travel orders 1171 01:17:30,312 --> 01:17:33,648 are being considered as authorities assess the scale of the disaster. 1172 01:17:34,191 --> 01:17:35,776 Close it. 1173 01:17:37,527 --> 01:17:40,906 [news anchor 2] But there has still been no official response from the president, 1174 01:17:40,989 --> 01:17:42,908 who remains locked in emergency talks. 1175 01:17:45,702 --> 01:17:47,537 Prepare a presidential decree. 1176 01:17:48,538 --> 01:17:50,666 Tell intelligence and law enforcement to stand down. 1177 01:17:50,749 --> 01:17:52,834 We're gonna dance to this lady's tune. 1178 01:17:52,918 --> 01:17:53,960 [Fox] Good. 1179 01:17:54,044 --> 01:17:55,420 We can make this work. 1180 01:17:55,545 --> 01:17:58,840 We… We spin it that it's not a matter of negotiating with terrorists. 1181 01:17:59,007 --> 01:18:00,842 No, what I'm proposing, 1182 01:18:01,009 --> 01:18:05,347 is we appear to agree to her demands to prevent global panic, 1183 01:18:05,430 --> 01:18:10,602 and then let the junkie scum go down in flames. Huh? 1184 01:18:10,686 --> 01:18:12,688 [laughing] 1185 01:18:12,771 --> 01:18:14,356 Huh? Yeah. 1186 01:18:14,981 --> 01:18:18,902 Take Poppy Adams and her so-called Golden Circle down with them. 1187 01:18:18,985 --> 01:18:22,280 No drug users, no drug trade. It's a win-win situation here. 1188 01:18:23,615 --> 01:18:26,743 But, sir, we're not talking about a handful of hostages. 1189 01:18:26,827 --> 01:18:30,163 We could be looking at the deaths of hundreds of millions worldwide. 1190 01:18:30,247 --> 01:18:32,749 Hundreds of millions of criminals, burdens to society. 1191 01:18:33,792 --> 01:18:35,085 Am I right, McCoy? 1192 01:18:35,210 --> 01:18:36,336 Absolutely, sir. 1193 01:18:36,420 --> 01:18:37,462 But, sir, that's… 1194 01:18:38,463 --> 01:18:40,882 What about people who were just experimenting? 1195 01:18:41,007 --> 01:18:42,926 Folks who self-medicate? 1196 01:18:43,009 --> 01:18:45,846 Functioning professionals? Kids? 1197 01:18:45,929 --> 01:18:47,472 Oh, spare me the crap, Fox. 1198 01:18:47,597 --> 01:18:49,099 [chuckles] The fact is, 1199 01:18:49,182 --> 01:18:52,185 this presidency has just won the war on drugs. 1200 01:18:52,269 --> 01:18:53,311 Congratulations, sir. 1201 01:18:54,020 --> 01:18:55,689 Thank you. 1202 01:18:57,899 --> 01:19:00,360 And that deserves a toast. 1203 01:19:01,069 --> 01:19:03,280 [Fox] This is totally unethical, sir. 1204 01:19:03,613 --> 01:19:05,240 [president] Fox, shut up! 1205 01:19:06,116 --> 01:19:07,951 McCoy, declare martial law. 1206 01:19:08,326 --> 01:19:10,912 We need to keep control, commandeer stadiums, 1207 01:19:10,996 --> 01:19:12,831 schools, civic centers… 1208 01:19:12,914 --> 01:19:14,374 Order a press blackout. 1209 01:19:14,458 --> 01:19:18,086 And put the military on standby to round these junkies up. 1210 01:19:19,254 --> 01:19:23,091 Whether they broke the law or not, those victims are human beings. 1211 01:19:25,427 --> 01:19:26,428 Tequila. 1212 01:19:27,679 --> 01:19:29,097 He's a great guy. 1213 01:19:30,599 --> 01:19:31,892 And a great agent. 1214 01:19:32,726 --> 01:19:36,396 Right now, he's lying in deep freeze waitin' on our help. 1215 01:19:36,480 --> 01:19:38,690 We can't make this personal, sir. 1216 01:19:38,773 --> 01:19:39,775 Personal? 1217 01:19:40,275 --> 01:19:42,569 Agent, we can't stand by and let folks like him die. 1218 01:19:43,069 --> 01:19:45,489 These people, we're their only hope. 1219 01:19:47,449 --> 01:19:49,201 Now, we have to find that antidote. 1220 01:19:49,284 --> 01:19:51,828 Poppy's stockpiles, well, they could be anywhere. 1221 01:19:51,912 --> 01:19:53,705 [Harry] She must have some on hand. 1222 01:19:53,789 --> 01:19:55,248 Locate Poppy, 1223 01:19:56,666 --> 01:19:58,668 and obtain a sample for analysis. 1224 01:19:59,377 --> 01:20:00,420 Maybe it can be replicated. 1225 01:20:01,254 --> 01:20:02,798 [Ginger] Sorry to cut in, guys. 1226 01:20:02,881 --> 01:20:04,257 But Charlie is on the phone with his girlfriend. 1227 01:20:04,341 --> 01:20:05,800 Looping you in now. 1228 01:20:06,676 --> 01:20:08,053 [Clara] Don't worry. I'm on a payphone, 1229 01:20:08,136 --> 01:20:10,639 covered in a fucking blue rash. 1230 01:20:10,722 --> 01:20:12,057 Why didn't you tell me? 1231 01:20:12,140 --> 01:20:14,809 All you said was, "Don't take any drugs." 1232 01:20:14,893 --> 01:20:17,103 It was a music festival, for fuck's sake. 1233 01:20:17,187 --> 01:20:21,024 Fuck. Shit. Shit! Okay. 1234 01:20:22,442 --> 01:20:24,361 Listen, you need to get to the lab in Italy. 1235 01:20:24,444 --> 01:20:25,904 Do you remember where we went skiing? 1236 01:20:25,987 --> 01:20:27,864 Yes. Yes, I remember. 1237 01:20:28,365 --> 01:20:31,409 Yeah. Meet me there and I'll give you the antidote. 1238 01:20:31,493 --> 01:20:32,827 [sighs] 1239 01:20:32,911 --> 01:20:34,037 Okay. 1240 01:20:38,083 --> 01:20:39,835 All right. Jet's ready. 1241 01:20:39,918 --> 01:20:42,337 Whiskey, Galahad, get to Italy. 1242 01:20:46,550 --> 01:20:48,385 You two need to fix this code name thing. 1243 01:20:48,468 --> 01:20:49,844 And with all due respect, sir… 1244 01:20:49,928 --> 01:20:52,764 I don't think Galahad senior is ready to return to fieldwork. 1245 01:20:53,890 --> 01:20:56,184 -I did actually mean… -Of course. 1246 01:20:56,268 --> 01:20:57,978 And with all disrespect… 1247 01:20:58,770 --> 01:21:00,480 I'm not going anywhere without him. 1248 01:21:01,815 --> 01:21:04,442 Brains, skills, 1249 01:21:05,694 --> 01:21:06,695 skipping rope? 1250 01:21:08,280 --> 01:21:09,322 [laughs] 1251 01:21:09,406 --> 01:21:10,907 -It's a lasso. -[Eggsy] Whatever. 1252 01:21:11,658 --> 01:21:12,909 Come on. 1253 01:21:12,993 --> 01:21:14,369 [Champ laughs] 1254 01:21:15,120 --> 01:21:16,705 Go on. Vamoose. 1255 01:21:16,830 --> 01:21:17,956 [Whiskey] Yes, sir. 1256 01:21:30,844 --> 01:21:32,053 Drink it. 1257 01:21:32,804 --> 01:21:34,014 [sighs] 1258 01:21:38,393 --> 01:21:39,686 [gasping] 1259 01:21:42,898 --> 01:21:43,982 Wow. 1260 01:21:44,065 --> 01:21:45,525 [Clara] It's working already. 1261 01:21:45,609 --> 01:21:47,360 [sighs] Thank God. 1262 01:21:48,153 --> 01:21:49,154 Agent Whiskey. 1263 01:21:49,321 --> 01:21:51,531 Antidote confirmed at the target's location. 1264 01:21:51,948 --> 01:21:53,116 Good luck. 1265 01:22:01,916 --> 01:22:04,002 [Whiskey] Hold up. We need you down here, Galahad. 1266 01:22:04,085 --> 01:22:05,462 To secure the control room. 1267 01:22:05,545 --> 01:22:07,047 [Eggsy] Probably a good idea, Harry. 1268 01:22:08,214 --> 01:22:09,799 Call you from the top, yeah? 1269 01:22:18,516 --> 01:22:19,893 Buongiorno! 1270 01:22:20,477 --> 01:22:21,811 -Buongiorno. -[in Italian] 1271 01:22:21,895 --> 01:22:23,021 I'm here to inspect the system. 1272 01:22:23,813 --> 01:22:24,814 May I see your ID please? 1273 01:22:25,482 --> 01:22:26,316 Of course. 1274 01:22:28,109 --> 01:22:29,110 [beeping] 1275 01:22:31,112 --> 01:22:32,072 What is this? 1276 01:22:34,783 --> 01:22:35,867 Hey! 1277 01:22:35,951 --> 01:22:37,118 What the hell are you doing? 1278 01:22:37,202 --> 01:22:38,203 [in English] So sorry about this. 1279 01:22:43,875 --> 01:22:46,002 At the controls. In position. 1280 01:23:05,397 --> 01:23:07,440 Keep this cable car here till we get back. 1281 01:23:07,524 --> 01:23:08,942 [Harry] Roger that, Eggsy. 1282 01:23:09,025 --> 01:23:10,485 Clara's definitely here. 1283 01:23:11,027 --> 01:23:12,237 We're getting warmer. 1284 01:23:17,367 --> 01:23:20,537 Harry Hart, Harry Hart, super spy, super spy. 1285 01:23:21,579 --> 01:23:23,832 Looks like we've got a door. 1286 01:23:23,957 --> 01:23:24,874 [Ginger] Yep. 1287 01:23:26,167 --> 01:23:27,168 There you go. 1288 01:23:37,721 --> 01:23:39,264 I'll cover. 1289 01:23:40,432 --> 01:23:41,433 Hi, there. 1290 01:23:41,891 --> 01:23:42,892 Whew. 1291 01:23:43,018 --> 01:23:44,811 Sorry I'm late. 1292 01:23:44,894 --> 01:23:47,105 You guys did not make this place easy to find. 1293 01:23:47,188 --> 01:23:48,231 Who are you? 1294 01:23:49,107 --> 01:23:50,942 I'm here to collect this antidote. 1295 01:23:51,735 --> 01:23:52,610 For Singapore? 1296 01:23:53,611 --> 01:23:54,904 Yeah. 1297 01:23:58,408 --> 01:24:01,619 You are Wu Ting Feng? 1298 01:24:05,582 --> 01:24:06,583 Yes. 1299 01:24:08,251 --> 01:24:10,503 Hey, how are you still alive? 1300 01:24:10,587 --> 01:24:12,630 River, what are you doing here? 1301 01:24:12,714 --> 01:24:13,715 [Charlie] River? 1302 01:24:13,840 --> 01:24:15,008 [Eggsy] Hi, Clara. 1303 01:24:15,091 --> 01:24:17,969 What happens at Glasto, stays in Glasto. 1304 01:24:21,097 --> 01:24:22,724 -You motherfucker! -Bye, Charlie. 1305 01:24:22,807 --> 01:24:24,100 Sound the alarm! 1306 01:24:24,976 --> 01:24:26,561 -You fucking cockroach! -[alarm blaring] 1307 01:24:26,644 --> 01:24:28,438 -Jam the door! -Give… 1308 01:24:35,445 --> 01:24:36,905 Fuck! 1309 01:24:37,280 --> 01:24:39,032 [Whiskey] Galahad, we're coming. 1310 01:24:39,115 --> 01:24:40,784 All clear at the bottom? 1311 01:24:41,659 --> 01:24:43,244 Galahad, come in! 1312 01:24:44,162 --> 01:24:45,997 -Open the fucking door. -They've locked. 1313 01:24:46,081 --> 01:24:47,123 Open the door! 1314 01:24:49,125 --> 01:24:50,543 Harry, come on, we're in. Let's go. 1315 01:24:50,627 --> 01:24:51,628 Away, butterflies. 1316 01:24:52,128 --> 01:24:54,380 Butterfly? No, Harry. You've got to shut the doors, please. 1317 01:24:54,464 --> 01:24:56,382 Come on. We've gotta go now. Please! 1318 01:24:56,466 --> 01:24:57,801 Shut the fucking door, Harry! 1319 01:24:58,468 --> 01:24:59,969 Harry, are you there? 1320 01:25:01,429 --> 01:25:03,181 Well done, Harry. Good. Thanks, man. 1321 01:25:03,640 --> 01:25:04,682 Come on. Now! 1322 01:25:07,102 --> 01:25:08,311 -It's done. -Thank you. 1323 01:25:32,335 --> 01:25:33,920 You all good down there, Harry? 1324 01:25:34,003 --> 01:25:35,046 All clear. 1325 01:25:40,718 --> 01:25:41,803 Hello, Eggsy. 1326 01:25:43,179 --> 01:25:45,056 Enjoy the ride, bruv. 1327 01:25:54,357 --> 01:25:55,358 Oh, shit. 1328 01:25:55,817 --> 01:25:56,860 [grunts] 1329 01:25:58,736 --> 01:26:00,029 [both yelling] 1330 01:26:04,659 --> 01:26:06,452 All the buttons are dead. Controls gone. 1331 01:26:06,536 --> 01:26:08,580 Everything's in shutdown. You're on your own, Eggsy. 1332 01:26:10,081 --> 01:26:11,207 [laughs] 1333 01:26:13,543 --> 01:26:15,587 [both groaning] 1334 01:26:25,680 --> 01:26:27,599 [yelling] 1335 01:26:27,682 --> 01:26:29,392 [Whiskey gasping] 1336 01:26:54,417 --> 01:26:55,418 What the fuck is that? 1337 01:27:06,095 --> 01:27:08,223 [both yelling] 1338 01:27:11,768 --> 01:27:12,894 Oh, my God. 1339 01:27:20,276 --> 01:27:21,277 [groans] 1340 01:27:21,778 --> 01:27:23,279 [both yelling] 1341 01:27:27,492 --> 01:27:28,493 [both grunt] 1342 01:27:30,286 --> 01:27:31,412 [panting] 1343 01:27:33,957 --> 01:27:34,958 [both grunt] 1344 01:27:46,970 --> 01:27:48,805 You've gotta be fucking kidding! 1345 01:27:54,602 --> 01:27:55,770 [both grunting] 1346 01:27:58,648 --> 01:27:59,983 [panting] 1347 01:28:07,782 --> 01:28:09,492 -Jesus fucking Christ! -What the fuck is that? 1348 01:28:09,659 --> 01:28:11,744 What the hell is that? 1349 01:28:11,828 --> 01:28:12,829 Shit! 1350 01:28:13,830 --> 01:28:14,831 [panting] 1351 01:28:16,124 --> 01:28:17,834 [grunting] 1352 01:28:25,842 --> 01:28:27,802 [both yelling] 1353 01:28:27,885 --> 01:28:29,846 [both yelling] 1354 01:28:30,847 --> 01:28:32,724 [all yelling] 1355 01:28:36,853 --> 01:28:38,521 [panting] 1356 01:28:38,604 --> 01:28:42,859 That's the first decent shit I've had in three weeks. 1357 01:28:47,655 --> 01:28:49,824 Harry, meet us at the emergency rendezvous point. 1358 01:28:49,907 --> 01:28:51,159 Roger that. 1359 01:28:51,826 --> 01:28:53,161 Got you on the GPS. 1360 01:29:22,106 --> 01:29:25,068 [Eggsy] So weird to think this tiny thing could save the world. 1361 01:29:25,401 --> 01:29:26,611 Let me have a look. 1362 01:29:27,195 --> 01:29:28,863 [rhythmic knocking on door] 1363 01:29:30,740 --> 01:29:31,949 Harry. 1364 01:29:36,454 --> 01:29:37,872 Am I late? 1365 01:29:38,873 --> 01:29:39,916 You found the antidote. 1366 01:29:42,794 --> 01:29:43,920 Get down! 1367 01:29:53,096 --> 01:29:54,472 [gunshot] 1368 01:30:01,062 --> 01:30:02,396 You fucking dickhead! 1369 01:30:02,480 --> 01:30:04,065 Fuck you! I just saved your life! 1370 01:30:04,148 --> 01:30:06,150 Yeah, and cost millions of people theirs! 1371 01:30:11,072 --> 01:30:12,406 [panting] 1372 01:30:19,914 --> 01:30:22,792 All right, they're going for cover and reloading. 1373 01:30:22,875 --> 01:30:24,961 I'll fix their wagons. Cover me, boys! 1374 01:30:27,964 --> 01:30:29,215 Wait. 1375 01:30:29,298 --> 01:30:31,717 Eggsy, I think he could be working for the other side. 1376 01:30:31,801 --> 01:30:33,553 What the fuck is wrong with you? 1377 01:30:33,636 --> 01:30:35,638 You're having a brain fart! Look! 1378 01:30:36,347 --> 01:30:38,766 Does that look like he's working with them? 1379 01:30:39,809 --> 01:30:42,728 Harry, are you seeing butterflies again? 1380 01:30:42,812 --> 01:30:44,021 I know what I'm seeing. 1381 01:30:47,150 --> 01:30:48,776 [grunting] 1382 01:31:06,002 --> 01:31:07,170 [click] 1383 01:31:36,157 --> 01:31:37,992 Good job he didn't need our help. 1384 01:31:38,659 --> 01:31:41,329 Thank fucking Christ I didn't need any backup! 1385 01:31:47,877 --> 01:31:50,004 I'm out of ammo! Troop carrier coming in. 1386 01:31:50,087 --> 01:31:51,214 What've you got? 1387 01:31:53,049 --> 01:31:54,050 Fuck! 1388 01:31:58,429 --> 01:31:59,889 Shit! There's a fuck ton of 'em! 1389 01:32:03,351 --> 01:32:04,560 What is this? 1390 01:32:05,186 --> 01:32:07,897 Looks like you packed for a fucking slumber party, not a mission! 1391 01:32:09,232 --> 01:32:11,400 And they've got fucking Gatling guns! 1392 01:32:12,068 --> 01:32:15,196 [man] You have ten seconds to surrender before we open fire! 1393 01:32:15,279 --> 01:32:16,447 Guys, hurry up! 1394 01:32:16,530 --> 01:32:17,531 [man] Ten! 1395 01:32:17,615 --> 01:32:18,658 Hey! 1396 01:32:19,116 --> 01:32:21,077 -[man] Nine! -Butterfly guy! 1397 01:32:22,578 --> 01:32:23,621 Eight! 1398 01:32:23,704 --> 01:32:25,456 You don't look like Ginger fixed you right. 1399 01:32:25,539 --> 01:32:27,875 -Seven! -I said, I'm empty! 1400 01:32:27,959 --> 01:32:29,377 -Six! -Give me yours. 1401 01:32:29,919 --> 01:32:30,920 Five! 1402 01:32:31,045 --> 01:32:32,088 Harry, give him the fucking gun! 1403 01:32:32,171 --> 01:32:33,256 Four! 1404 01:32:34,799 --> 01:32:37,093 Harry, no! 1405 01:32:41,264 --> 01:32:42,807 Oh, fuck it! Fire! 1406 01:32:42,890 --> 01:32:43,933 Harry, get down! 1407 01:32:51,565 --> 01:32:54,360 I mean, honestly, Harry, what the fuck is wrong with you? 1408 01:32:54,443 --> 01:32:55,611 He broke the vial on purpose! 1409 01:32:56,946 --> 01:32:59,365 You're a fucking idiot! You're out of control, Harry! 1410 01:32:59,448 --> 01:33:01,284 If we made it out of here, he was gonna kill us both! 1411 01:33:06,414 --> 01:33:08,624 For fuck's sake, it looks like he wouldn't have fucking had to! 1412 01:33:08,749 --> 01:33:10,126 Oh, ye of little faith. 1413 01:33:12,586 --> 01:33:14,338 [explosion] 1414 01:33:32,189 --> 01:33:34,191 This does not mean you're off the fucking hook! 1415 01:33:35,151 --> 01:33:36,736 We need to go dark. 1416 01:33:36,819 --> 01:33:39,780 We don't know who else at Statesman could be working against us. 1417 01:33:40,489 --> 01:33:41,657 Shit! This is all my fault. 1418 01:33:41,741 --> 01:33:43,826 You weren't ready for the field and I pushed for it. 1419 01:33:43,951 --> 01:33:45,036 He showed his hand. 1420 01:33:45,119 --> 01:33:46,746 You think he'd have let us live? 1421 01:33:46,829 --> 01:33:48,789 You should be thanking me for saving our arses. 1422 01:33:48,873 --> 01:33:51,500 Saving our arses? Try saying that to fucking Whiskey! 1423 01:33:57,006 --> 01:33:58,549 [hissing] 1424 01:34:01,677 --> 01:34:03,179 You are unbelievable! 1425 01:34:04,221 --> 01:34:06,057 -Merlin, can you hear me? -[Merlin] Yes, Eggsy. 1426 01:34:06,140 --> 01:34:07,224 Whiskey's down. He's been shot. 1427 01:34:07,850 --> 01:34:09,143 What happened? 1428 01:34:16,192 --> 01:34:18,194 He got caught in the crossfire. 1429 01:34:19,070 --> 01:34:21,072 I've applied the alpha gel. We'll bring him in. 1430 01:34:21,155 --> 01:34:22,948 But first, I've gotta find a way to get back up to that lab 1431 01:34:23,032 --> 01:34:24,700 and retrieve more antidote. 1432 01:34:24,825 --> 01:34:25,868 [helicopter approaching] 1433 01:34:27,661 --> 01:34:30,456 [Clara] Charlie, what's happening? Where are you? 1434 01:34:30,539 --> 01:34:32,291 Everything's under control. 1435 01:34:32,375 --> 01:34:34,627 I'm sorry, Charlie. I'm so sorry. 1436 01:34:35,044 --> 01:34:37,296 Please don't tell Poppy it was me they followed. 1437 01:34:37,380 --> 01:34:38,672 [Charlie] Don't worry, darling. 1438 01:34:38,756 --> 01:34:40,758 What happens in Italy… 1439 01:34:40,841 --> 01:34:42,343 [panting] 1440 01:34:43,177 --> 01:34:44,428 Stays in Italy. 1441 01:34:45,679 --> 01:34:46,722 Thank you. 1442 01:34:48,849 --> 01:34:50,559 [explosions] 1443 01:35:00,111 --> 01:35:04,532 Merlin, change of plans. Wu Ting Feng, Singapore. 1444 01:35:04,615 --> 01:35:05,866 -Who? -[Eggsy] Exactly. 1445 01:35:05,950 --> 01:35:07,493 It's the only lead we've got. 1446 01:35:07,576 --> 01:35:09,203 So I suggest you find out who he is. 1447 01:35:11,080 --> 01:35:12,081 Come on. 1448 01:35:16,377 --> 01:35:18,462 Wu Ting Feng, he's an assistant at a law firm. 1449 01:35:19,088 --> 01:35:20,631 [Merlin] Let's get through their firewall. 1450 01:35:20,714 --> 01:35:21,757 [Ginger] Yep. 1451 01:35:22,883 --> 01:35:24,135 Merlin… 1452 01:35:24,218 --> 01:35:26,554 Have you ever wanted to do more than this? 1453 01:35:27,555 --> 01:35:29,014 -Are you serious? -Yeah. 1454 01:35:29,098 --> 01:35:30,182 This is vital. 1455 01:35:30,266 --> 01:35:31,851 Without us, they'd be lost. 1456 01:35:31,934 --> 01:35:34,228 I know, but you know what I mean. 1457 01:35:34,311 --> 01:35:35,563 Get out there in the field. 1458 01:35:36,605 --> 01:35:37,815 Well, have you ever asked? 1459 01:35:37,898 --> 01:35:38,983 Of course I have. 1460 01:35:39,066 --> 01:35:41,485 But every time an agent's position has come up… 1461 01:35:41,569 --> 01:35:44,238 Whiskey has voted against me. 1462 01:35:44,321 --> 01:35:46,407 -No. -Yeah. 1463 01:35:46,490 --> 01:35:48,534 Wait, wait, wait. Look, check it out. 1464 01:35:48,617 --> 01:35:51,620 Email in from Poppy, from a senior partner at the firm. 1465 01:35:53,122 --> 01:35:54,582 They're coordinates. 1466 01:35:58,085 --> 01:35:59,336 Cambodia? 1467 01:36:00,671 --> 01:36:03,007 You have any reconnaissance drones down in Asia? 1468 01:36:03,090 --> 01:36:04,842 [Ginger] Sure do. Sending them in right now. 1469 01:36:11,640 --> 01:36:14,310 [news anchor 1] The government today urged Golden Circle victims 1470 01:36:14,393 --> 01:36:19,064 to report to the temporary field hospitals now set up across the country. 1471 01:36:19,190 --> 01:36:20,941 [news anchor 2] The president's handling of the crisis 1472 01:36:21,066 --> 01:36:23,694 has been commended by other world leaders. 1473 01:36:23,777 --> 01:36:26,405 Damn. Politics has never been so easy. 1474 01:36:26,489 --> 01:36:28,574 Oh, Jesus, Fox. 1475 01:36:28,657 --> 01:36:29,825 What? 1476 01:36:38,000 --> 01:36:39,168 Oh, God. 1477 01:36:44,131 --> 01:36:45,174 Like I said, sir, 1478 01:36:45,299 --> 01:36:47,927 this affects all people from all backgrounds. 1479 01:36:48,010 --> 01:36:49,678 I'm disappointed, Fox. 1480 01:36:49,803 --> 01:36:51,555 Disappointed and disgusted. 1481 01:36:51,639 --> 01:36:56,894 Mr. President, I routinely work a 20-hour day for you, seven days a week. 1482 01:36:57,353 --> 01:37:00,189 Maybe some can do that without chemical help. 1483 01:37:00,523 --> 01:37:03,442 Countless people are going to die. 1484 01:37:03,526 --> 01:37:05,027 You can save them, sir. 1485 01:37:06,195 --> 01:37:07,696 Innocent people like me. 1486 01:37:10,157 --> 01:37:11,742 Not that innocent. 1487 01:37:14,703 --> 01:37:15,704 [clicks tongue] 1488 01:37:42,398 --> 01:37:43,440 He looks great. 1489 01:37:43,566 --> 01:37:44,608 Good. 1490 01:37:50,072 --> 01:37:51,490 Good news, gentlemen. 1491 01:37:51,574 --> 01:37:52,992 He'll be back on his feet in no time. 1492 01:37:53,075 --> 01:37:54,994 I'm not certain that's a good idea. 1493 01:37:55,077 --> 01:37:56,161 What do you mean? 1494 01:37:56,245 --> 01:37:58,080 I shot Agent Whiskey. Deliberately. 1495 01:37:58,581 --> 01:37:59,623 What, why? 1496 01:37:59,748 --> 01:38:00,874 He was working against us. 1497 01:38:00,958 --> 01:38:03,127 And until we find out why, I say we trust no one. 1498 01:38:03,210 --> 01:38:05,087 Merlin, Harry's sick. 1499 01:38:05,421 --> 01:38:07,214 This whole thing is my fault. 1500 01:38:07,298 --> 01:38:08,674 I thought he was ready. 1501 01:38:08,757 --> 01:38:10,301 -[cell phone ringing] -[sighs] 1502 01:38:14,096 --> 01:38:16,265 I'm sorry, I've got to take this. 1503 01:38:16,599 --> 01:38:17,641 Listen to me. 1504 01:38:18,100 --> 01:38:19,768 This is not about my mental health. 1505 01:38:19,935 --> 01:38:22,313 If there's a chance there's a double agent in our midst… 1506 01:38:22,396 --> 01:38:26,150 Or worse, if Statesman itself has a dark agenda, 1507 01:38:27,109 --> 01:38:28,861 we have to safeguard this mission. 1508 01:38:28,944 --> 01:38:32,281 We both know the president wants these victims dead. 1509 01:38:32,656 --> 01:38:34,116 [chuckles] Hey, baby. 1510 01:38:34,199 --> 01:38:35,534 [chuckles] 1511 01:38:36,118 --> 01:38:37,119 Hey. 1512 01:38:37,911 --> 01:38:39,163 [Princess Tilde laughs] 1513 01:38:39,580 --> 01:38:40,664 Fuck. 1514 01:38:40,748 --> 01:38:43,334 Look, Harry, I trust you. I always have. 1515 01:38:43,584 --> 01:38:48,047 But it's about this situation. We need Statesman's resources. 1516 01:38:48,130 --> 01:38:50,090 And I need to know that you are fit for work. 1517 01:38:50,215 --> 01:38:51,884 Babe, why didn't you call me? 1518 01:38:51,967 --> 01:38:53,552 Are you the banana man? 1519 01:38:53,636 --> 01:38:56,513 Listen, we're on the verge of finding an antidote. It's gonna be all right. 1520 01:38:56,597 --> 01:38:57,640 Now, look left for me. 1521 01:38:57,765 --> 01:38:58,766 There's nothing wrong with my brain. 1522 01:38:58,891 --> 01:39:00,351 Look right. 1523 01:39:00,476 --> 01:39:01,518 Can you remember the headline 1524 01:39:01,602 --> 01:39:03,437 when you uncovered that spy ring in the Pentagon? 1525 01:39:03,520 --> 01:39:05,689 The football. England beat Germany, 5-1. 1526 01:39:05,773 --> 01:39:07,149 Thatcher's assassination attempt. 1527 01:39:07,232 --> 01:39:08,192 Charles and Di's wedding. 1528 01:39:08,317 --> 01:39:09,777 [chuckles] Hey, Björn Borg. 1529 01:39:20,371 --> 01:39:24,416 Babe, if you can hear me, I want you to know that I love you. 1530 01:39:24,500 --> 01:39:26,418 And if we get through this, and you'll have me back, 1531 01:39:26,502 --> 01:39:29,296 I wanna be with you. No matter what. 1532 01:39:29,380 --> 01:39:30,422 I promise I won't let you down. 1533 01:39:30,506 --> 01:39:31,965 It's all gonna be all right. 1534 01:39:32,049 --> 01:39:33,550 My favorite singer. 1535 01:39:33,634 --> 01:39:35,552 I don't bloody know. How would I know that? 1536 01:39:35,636 --> 01:39:37,554 -It's John Denver. -Merlin! 1537 01:39:38,138 --> 01:39:39,515 Have you got eyes on that location yet? 1538 01:39:40,182 --> 01:39:42,184 Soon. The reconnaissance drone's about an hour away, 1539 01:39:42,309 --> 01:39:43,435 which gives us time to sort out… 1540 01:39:43,519 --> 01:39:45,104 Bollocks, we haven't got time for anything. 1541 01:39:45,187 --> 01:39:47,314 I'm leaving now, with or without you. 1542 01:40:05,541 --> 01:40:07,418 -Hello! -[guns cocking] 1543 01:40:07,501 --> 01:40:08,919 [guard] Identify yourself. 1544 01:40:09,002 --> 01:40:12,589 My name is Stacey Prewitt. I'm Ms. Poppy Adams' attorney. 1545 01:40:13,424 --> 01:40:15,467 Poppy, you expecting a lawyer tonight? 1546 01:40:15,551 --> 01:40:17,553 Oh, yes. Please send him in. 1547 01:40:17,636 --> 01:40:20,556 But don't forget to reactivate the land mines. 1548 01:40:23,058 --> 01:40:24,601 [protesters clamoring] 1549 01:40:25,936 --> 01:40:27,604 Good evening, Ms. Adams. 1550 01:40:27,688 --> 01:40:32,693 My lawyer is bringing you the document right now. 1551 01:40:32,776 --> 01:40:34,319 Hurry up. 1552 01:40:34,403 --> 01:40:35,487 And once you countersign, 1553 01:40:35,571 --> 01:40:37,948 it becomes an executive decree, and you can't back out, 1554 01:40:38,031 --> 01:40:39,324 and then I release the antidote. 1555 01:40:39,408 --> 01:40:42,494 Can you give me any assurance you can get it out there in time? 1556 01:40:42,578 --> 01:40:43,662 And where's it gonna come from? 1557 01:40:43,746 --> 01:40:45,038 How long it'll take to distribute? 1558 01:40:45,122 --> 01:40:47,666 I wouldn't worry about that. I have secure stockpiles 1559 01:40:47,750 --> 01:40:50,711 hidden in every major city worldwide. 1560 01:40:50,794 --> 01:40:53,005 And when I enter the access code, 1561 01:40:53,088 --> 01:40:56,800 my fleet of drones will distribute the antidote immediately. 1562 01:40:57,551 --> 01:41:01,638 So don't dilly-dally signin' that document 'cause time is running out. 1563 01:41:03,098 --> 01:41:04,349 [laughs] 1564 01:41:04,433 --> 01:41:05,893 You dumb bitch! 1565 01:41:15,819 --> 01:41:16,904 You all right? 1566 01:41:18,947 --> 01:41:20,783 What was that phone call you got? 1567 01:41:21,074 --> 01:41:22,618 Let's not, Harry. 1568 01:41:23,452 --> 01:41:24,745 I don't think you'd sympathize, 1569 01:41:24,828 --> 01:41:26,789 and I'm not really in the mood for a lecture. 1570 01:41:30,793 --> 01:41:31,835 All right. 1571 01:41:34,963 --> 01:41:37,633 How about a martini? For old times' sake? 1572 01:41:39,760 --> 01:41:40,803 Yeah, all right. 1573 01:41:53,982 --> 01:41:55,943 I had a girlfriend. 1574 01:41:58,195 --> 01:41:59,196 I lost her. 1575 01:42:00,614 --> 01:42:02,032 And it broke me. 1576 01:42:04,284 --> 01:42:06,537 And now, if this mission fails, 1577 01:42:08,121 --> 01:42:09,289 she's gonna die. 1578 01:42:11,500 --> 01:42:15,712 I know it's against Kingsman rules, having a relationship. 1579 01:42:19,716 --> 01:42:21,009 When I was shot, 1580 01:42:21,802 --> 01:42:24,638 can you guess what the last thing was that flashed through my mind? 1581 01:42:27,182 --> 01:42:30,853 It was absolutely nothing. 1582 01:42:33,188 --> 01:42:34,815 I had no ties. 1583 01:42:35,691 --> 01:42:37,901 No bittersweet memories. 1584 01:42:38,694 --> 01:42:40,529 I was leaving nothing behind. 1585 01:42:42,698 --> 01:42:44,825 Never experienced companionship, 1586 01:42:45,826 --> 01:42:47,202 never been in love, 1587 01:42:48,579 --> 01:42:50,455 and in that moment, 1588 01:42:50,539 --> 01:42:53,709 all I felt was loneliness 1589 01:42:54,209 --> 01:42:55,252 and regret. 1590 01:42:57,045 --> 01:42:58,463 I'm sorry. 1591 01:42:58,547 --> 01:42:59,548 Don't be. 1592 01:43:02,050 --> 01:43:04,219 Just know that having something to lose 1593 01:43:06,555 --> 01:43:08,891 is what makes life worth living. 1594 01:43:09,933 --> 01:43:11,852 Now, let's go and save your girl. 1595 01:43:13,228 --> 01:43:14,897 I missed you, Harry. 1596 01:43:20,110 --> 01:43:21,236 Gentlemen. 1597 01:43:21,695 --> 01:43:23,071 I hate to break up a party. 1598 01:43:23,572 --> 01:43:26,533 We're nearly there, so I suggest we get ready. 1599 01:43:27,910 --> 01:43:28,911 Follow me. 1600 01:43:38,629 --> 01:43:40,756 Oh, yes. 1601 01:43:47,763 --> 01:43:49,723 [gasping] 1602 01:43:50,307 --> 01:43:51,808 Hello, gorgeous. 1603 01:43:51,892 --> 01:43:53,268 I'm Jack. What's your name? 1604 01:43:53,352 --> 01:43:55,395 How would you like to ride home on a real cowboy? 1605 01:43:55,479 --> 01:43:58,398 I got a six pack of cold ones on ice and my roomie's out all night. 1606 01:43:58,482 --> 01:44:01,526 So you can scream my name as loud as you need to, sugar. 1607 01:44:01,610 --> 01:44:04,237 I hate to do this to you, Jack. 1608 01:44:04,321 --> 01:44:05,405 Who's this pretty lady? 1609 01:44:05,489 --> 01:44:06,490 She's dead. 1610 01:44:07,074 --> 01:44:09,534 Cops said wrong place, wrong time. 1611 01:44:09,618 --> 01:44:11,495 Hey, honey. I'm heading to the grocery store. 1612 01:44:16,750 --> 01:44:17,960 My name is Poppy Adams. 1613 01:44:24,549 --> 01:44:25,968 [chuckles softly] 1614 01:44:34,893 --> 01:44:35,978 Ginger. 1615 01:44:36,061 --> 01:44:39,398 Goddamn butterfly guy shot me in the fucking head. 1616 01:44:39,564 --> 01:44:40,899 Why would he do that? 1617 01:44:41,525 --> 01:44:43,568 [panting] 1618 01:44:43,652 --> 01:44:45,445 Well, I'm guessing you didn't fix him right. 1619 01:44:45,946 --> 01:44:47,656 And where the hell is he? 1620 01:44:47,739 --> 01:44:51,326 He's on his way to Cambodia with Eggsy and Merlin. 1621 01:44:51,410 --> 01:44:53,412 That's where Poppy's base is. 1622 01:44:53,495 --> 01:44:55,080 Eggsy's gonna need backup. 1623 01:44:55,163 --> 01:44:56,415 Yes, he is. 1624 01:44:56,498 --> 01:44:59,042 Get the Silver Pony on the runway and ready to take off. 1625 01:45:09,761 --> 01:45:11,096 [Eggsy] Hey, hey. 1626 01:45:11,179 --> 01:45:13,640 Looking good, Merlin. 1627 01:45:14,474 --> 01:45:15,976 Feeling good, Eggsy. 1628 01:45:16,351 --> 01:45:17,436 [chuckles] 1629 01:45:19,354 --> 01:45:21,440 Right. This is yours. 1630 01:45:22,941 --> 01:45:24,109 That's for you. 1631 01:45:36,872 --> 01:45:38,498 Press the "S." 1632 01:45:39,458 --> 01:45:40,876 Minesweeper. 1633 01:45:40,959 --> 01:45:42,169 Courtesy of Statesman. 1634 01:45:43,211 --> 01:45:44,796 -[Eggsy] And what about these? -[Merlin] Careful. 1635 01:45:45,297 --> 01:45:46,631 Those are hand grenades. 1636 01:45:48,967 --> 01:45:52,179 As discussed, this is for the endgame. 1637 01:45:53,055 --> 01:45:54,473 I'm entrusting it to you. 1638 01:46:01,271 --> 01:46:03,648 And I'm entrusting this… 1639 01:46:06,568 --> 01:46:07,652 to me. 1640 01:46:30,383 --> 01:46:33,386 [news anchor 1] Millions of Golden Circle victims worldwide 1641 01:46:33,512 --> 01:46:36,723 are now entering stage three paralysis. 1642 01:46:39,518 --> 01:46:40,602 [news anchor 2] In his latest statement, 1643 01:46:40,685 --> 01:46:43,563 the president promised he was doing everything in his power 1644 01:46:43,647 --> 01:46:46,817 to speed up negotiations and save lives. 1645 01:46:46,900 --> 01:46:50,403 But fears are growing that for many, it may soon be too late. 1646 01:46:50,487 --> 01:46:53,406 Our thoughts and prayers are with the victims. 1647 01:46:53,490 --> 01:46:54,616 God help us all. 1648 01:47:00,038 --> 01:47:01,623 [sobbing] 1649 01:47:38,076 --> 01:47:39,786 [Harry whispering] Right. This is where we split up. 1650 01:47:39,870 --> 01:47:41,037 Pincer movement. 1651 01:47:41,454 --> 01:47:42,831 Merlin, you're with me. 1652 01:47:42,914 --> 01:47:44,875 Eggsy, you signal when we're in position. 1653 01:47:46,126 --> 01:47:47,669 -[clicks] -[beeping] 1654 01:47:53,175 --> 01:47:55,218 [Merlin] Don't move. 1655 01:47:56,303 --> 01:47:58,930 You move, we die. 1656 01:48:07,480 --> 01:48:09,399 Luckily, I have this. 1657 01:48:18,116 --> 01:48:21,703 This spray will freeze the trigger mechanism 1658 01:48:21,870 --> 01:48:24,706 give us a split second. 1659 01:48:25,707 --> 01:48:28,043 So on the count of three, 1660 01:48:28,126 --> 01:48:29,377 what I want you to… 1661 01:48:29,461 --> 01:48:30,545 Merlin! 1662 01:48:36,676 --> 01:48:38,511 [panting] 1663 01:48:46,519 --> 01:48:47,896 Merlin, what the fuck have you done? 1664 01:48:48,647 --> 01:48:51,316 Our journey together began many years ago, 1665 01:48:52,400 --> 01:48:54,069 when your father did the same thing for us. 1666 01:48:54,945 --> 01:48:57,530 Our journey began with a mistake I made. 1667 01:48:57,614 --> 01:48:59,449 Give me the can. That's an order. 1668 01:49:00,075 --> 01:49:01,159 Can's empty. 1669 01:49:01,952 --> 01:49:03,161 Split second's over. 1670 01:49:03,745 --> 01:49:05,497 You two need to get going. 1671 01:49:05,580 --> 01:49:06,873 No, no, no. There's got to be another way. 1672 01:49:06,957 --> 01:49:07,958 [Harry] He's right. 1673 01:49:08,041 --> 01:49:09,626 Mission comes first. 1674 01:49:09,709 --> 01:49:10,835 Bollocks, mission comes first! 1675 01:49:10,919 --> 01:49:12,003 Eggsy! 1676 01:49:12,128 --> 01:49:14,798 This is no time for emotion. Remember your training. 1677 01:49:14,881 --> 01:49:16,132 Or we all die. 1678 01:49:18,551 --> 01:49:20,136 Now get on with it. 1679 01:49:20,303 --> 01:49:21,471 Do as you're told. 1680 01:49:21,638 --> 01:49:22,722 Move it! 1681 01:49:30,272 --> 01:49:31,273 Go. 1682 01:49:40,365 --> 01:49:41,366 It's been an honor. 1683 01:49:43,660 --> 01:49:44,661 Good luck. 1684 01:50:09,602 --> 01:50:11,771 [Merlin singing] ♪ Almost heaven ♪ 1685 01:50:11,855 --> 01:50:12,856 [guns cocking] 1686 01:50:13,565 --> 01:50:14,816 ♪ West Virginia ♪ 1687 01:50:16,943 --> 01:50:18,570 ♪ Blue Ridge Mountains ♪ 1688 01:50:18,653 --> 01:50:21,489 ♪ Shenandoah River ♪ 1689 01:50:22,615 --> 01:50:24,367 -Poppy, come in. -[Poppy] Roger. 1690 01:50:24,451 --> 01:50:25,493 ♪ Life is old there ♪ 1691 01:50:25,577 --> 01:50:26,703 [guard] Are you expecting another lawyer? 1692 01:50:26,786 --> 01:50:28,038 ♪ Older than the trees ♪ 1693 01:50:28,121 --> 01:50:29,581 [guard] There's a guy here singing. 1694 01:50:29,664 --> 01:50:31,207 ♪ Younger than the mountains ♪ 1695 01:50:31,291 --> 01:50:32,625 Singing? 1696 01:50:32,709 --> 01:50:34,127 ♪ Blowin' like a breeze ♪ 1697 01:50:34,210 --> 01:50:37,005 ♪ Country roads ♪ 1698 01:50:37,088 --> 01:50:39,466 ♪ Take me home ♪ 1699 01:50:39,758 --> 01:50:42,093 ♪ To the place ♪ 1700 01:50:42,719 --> 01:50:43,845 ♪ I belong ♪ 1701 01:50:43,928 --> 01:50:45,597 [Poppy] Bring him to me. 1702 01:50:45,680 --> 01:50:48,433 ♪ West Virginia ♪ 1703 01:50:48,516 --> 01:50:51,102 ♪ Mountain momma ♪ 1704 01:50:51,186 --> 01:50:53,938 ♪ Take me home ♪ 1705 01:50:54,022 --> 01:50:56,024 ♪ Country road ♪ 1706 01:50:57,776 --> 01:50:59,736 [guard] Poppy, we got a situation here. 1707 01:50:59,819 --> 01:51:02,072 ♪ Country roads ♪ 1708 01:51:02,155 --> 01:51:04,574 ♪ Take me home ♪ 1709 01:51:04,657 --> 01:51:09,579 ♪ To the place I belong ♪ 1710 01:51:09,662 --> 01:51:11,581 ♪ West Virginia ♪ 1711 01:51:13,375 --> 01:51:15,168 ♪ Mountain momma ♪ 1712 01:51:15,251 --> 01:51:17,754 ♪ Take me home ♪ 1713 01:51:17,837 --> 01:51:21,466 ♪ Country roads ♪ 1714 01:51:29,432 --> 01:51:30,600 [guards groaning] 1715 01:51:37,357 --> 01:51:38,441 [Poppy] Ooh. 1716 01:51:38,691 --> 01:51:40,151 He stepped on a land mine. 1717 01:51:41,069 --> 01:51:43,279 Can we get somebody out there to clean that up? 1718 01:51:45,198 --> 01:51:46,616 Hello? 1719 01:51:46,699 --> 01:51:48,493 [piano playing] 1720 01:52:01,381 --> 01:52:02,966 [gunfire] 1721 01:52:03,049 --> 01:52:04,801 Crap. We're under attack. 1722 01:52:04,968 --> 01:52:06,386 Code five. Code five. 1723 01:52:06,970 --> 01:52:09,139 You two, off your fuckin' asses. Guard the door. 1724 01:52:10,390 --> 01:52:12,225 Sir Elton, stay here. We're under attack. 1725 01:52:12,308 --> 01:52:14,269 [alarm blaring] 1726 01:52:15,395 --> 01:52:17,439 -Is it a rescue attempt? -Might be. 1727 01:52:18,440 --> 01:52:19,524 Yes! 1728 01:52:19,607 --> 01:52:21,443 [plays upbeat tune] 1729 01:52:21,526 --> 01:52:23,403 [Elton singing] ♪ Wednesday, Wednesday ♪ 1730 01:52:23,486 --> 01:52:25,238 ♪ Wednesday, Wednesday ♪ 1731 01:52:25,321 --> 01:52:27,615 ♪ Wednesday, Wednesday ♪ 1732 01:52:27,699 --> 01:52:29,617 ♪ Wednesday night's all right ♪ 1733 01:52:29,701 --> 01:52:30,785 ♪ Hey ♪ 1734 01:52:30,869 --> 01:52:32,162 Isn't that supposed to be Saturday? 1735 01:52:32,245 --> 01:52:34,038 -What day is it today? -Wednesday. 1736 01:52:34,122 --> 01:52:35,290 Exactly! 1737 01:52:35,373 --> 01:52:37,417 -[groans] -[grunts] 1738 01:52:42,422 --> 01:52:43,423 [beeping] 1739 01:52:44,966 --> 01:52:48,052 ["Saturday" playing] 1740 01:52:54,434 --> 01:52:56,644 -[grunting] -[groaning] 1741 01:53:16,247 --> 01:53:18,291 -Elton, just calm down. -Fuck you! 1742 01:53:23,796 --> 01:53:25,381 [guards yelling] 1743 01:53:30,220 --> 01:53:31,262 [guard] Stay there, Elton. 1744 01:53:31,387 --> 01:53:32,472 [Elton] Fuck off! 1745 01:53:32,555 --> 01:53:34,599 Or I'll fuck you up. 1746 01:54:09,425 --> 01:54:10,468 Fuck me. 1747 01:54:11,594 --> 01:54:12,637 [yelling] 1748 01:54:32,365 --> 01:54:34,325 [grunting] 1749 01:55:10,028 --> 01:55:12,196 Holy cow. Get this out of here. Go! 1750 01:55:14,240 --> 01:55:15,241 [Harry] Eggsy, get the case. 1751 01:55:17,702 --> 01:55:18,703 [beeping] 1752 01:55:20,288 --> 01:55:23,249 You are going to tell me what the access code is. 1753 01:55:23,333 --> 01:55:24,375 [whistles] 1754 01:55:30,965 --> 01:55:31,966 [bullet clinks] 1755 01:55:32,300 --> 01:55:34,010 [panting] 1756 01:55:36,304 --> 01:55:37,472 [grunting] 1757 01:55:43,603 --> 01:55:44,646 [groans] 1758 01:55:44,729 --> 01:55:45,730 [barking] 1759 01:55:47,857 --> 01:55:49,776 -[growling] -[grunting] 1760 01:55:54,405 --> 01:55:55,865 [grunting] 1761 01:56:25,687 --> 01:56:27,563 [panting] 1762 01:56:35,989 --> 01:56:37,156 [grunts] 1763 01:56:41,077 --> 01:56:42,704 [panting] 1764 01:56:54,048 --> 01:56:56,342 Come on, Jet. Good girl. 1765 01:56:59,303 --> 01:57:01,055 -[groans] -[yells] 1766 01:57:02,056 --> 01:57:04,434 -Motherfucker! -[groaning] 1767 01:57:09,355 --> 01:57:10,606 [grunts] 1768 01:57:20,116 --> 01:57:21,409 [panting] 1769 01:57:29,417 --> 01:57:31,377 ["Rocket Man" playing] 1770 01:57:35,798 --> 01:57:37,175 Get out of the way, Elton. 1771 01:57:38,217 --> 01:57:40,136 Stay down. It's not allowed to hurt me. 1772 01:57:40,303 --> 01:57:41,345 Thank you. 1773 01:57:43,306 --> 01:57:44,557 [Eggsy wheezing] 1774 01:57:46,476 --> 01:57:48,394 [sighing] 1775 01:57:57,904 --> 01:57:59,405 [beeping] 1776 01:58:03,659 --> 01:58:05,745 [grunting] 1777 01:58:11,501 --> 01:58:12,543 [groans] 1778 01:58:19,675 --> 01:58:20,927 Fuck you, Poppy! 1779 01:58:21,594 --> 01:58:22,970 Fuck you, Poppy! 1780 01:58:23,554 --> 01:58:25,556 Fuck you, Elton. 1781 01:58:27,058 --> 01:58:29,644 Kill Elton John. 1782 01:58:32,814 --> 01:58:33,856 Fuck! 1783 01:58:36,150 --> 01:58:37,777 Elton, take the ball. 1784 01:58:39,403 --> 01:58:40,446 [crackles] 1785 01:58:40,530 --> 01:58:41,656 [gasps] 1786 01:58:42,490 --> 01:58:44,617 -[whirring] -[barking] 1787 01:58:47,328 --> 01:58:48,371 Thank you. 1788 01:58:48,538 --> 01:58:51,040 Now, go off and save the world. 1789 01:58:51,124 --> 01:58:52,583 If I save the world, can I have two tickets 1790 01:58:52,667 --> 01:58:53,835 to your next concert? 1791 01:58:53,918 --> 01:58:57,672 Darling, if you save the world, you can have a backstage pass. 1792 01:59:00,258 --> 01:59:02,093 [groaning] 1793 01:59:06,013 --> 01:59:07,682 Fuck you. 1794 01:59:10,685 --> 01:59:11,727 Time's up. 1795 01:59:12,103 --> 01:59:13,187 Fuck! 1796 01:59:18,943 --> 01:59:19,944 [Poppy] Bennie, Bennie, Bennie! 1797 01:59:20,403 --> 01:59:21,445 Get them! 1798 01:59:21,529 --> 01:59:22,572 Got it. 1799 01:59:22,655 --> 01:59:24,782 -[barking] -[Charlie] Kill him, Bennie! 1800 01:59:25,241 --> 01:59:27,368 Here, heel! Heel! Good boy! 1801 01:59:27,451 --> 01:59:28,494 Come on! 1802 01:59:29,161 --> 01:59:30,163 [grunts] 1803 01:59:33,875 --> 01:59:34,959 [groans] 1804 01:59:35,042 --> 01:59:36,294 Give me the code. 1805 01:59:36,377 --> 01:59:38,045 No. We're not done yet. 1806 01:59:44,135 --> 01:59:45,428 Lucky for you, Charlie, 1807 01:59:45,511 --> 01:59:47,972 one of us understands what it means to be a gentleman. 1808 01:59:48,055 --> 01:59:49,348 [panting] 1809 01:59:53,686 --> 01:59:55,021 Let's make this fair. 1810 02:00:06,240 --> 02:00:07,783 [grunting] 1811 02:00:28,262 --> 02:00:30,181 [groaning] 1812 02:00:36,228 --> 02:00:37,605 [powering down] 1813 02:00:41,651 --> 02:00:42,902 Give me the code! 1814 02:00:43,069 --> 02:00:44,946 I can't. 1815 02:00:45,029 --> 02:00:46,030 Only Poppy knows it. 1816 02:00:47,031 --> 02:00:48,491 Well, then you're no use to me, are you? 1817 02:00:49,367 --> 02:00:50,409 For the record, Charlie, 1818 02:00:50,576 --> 02:00:52,828 I'm more of a gentleman than you'll ever be. 1819 02:00:53,996 --> 02:00:56,249 But right now, it's time to drop the gentle bit. 1820 02:00:57,667 --> 02:00:59,001 This is for Kingsman. 1821 02:01:00,002 --> 02:01:01,504 For my mate Brandon. 1822 02:01:02,463 --> 02:01:03,714 For Roxy. 1823 02:01:04,298 --> 02:01:05,716 For JB. 1824 02:01:08,094 --> 02:01:09,553 And for Merlin. 1825 02:01:11,264 --> 02:01:12,848 Good night, bruv. 1826 02:01:12,932 --> 02:01:14,684 -[neck snaps] -[panting] 1827 02:01:39,375 --> 02:01:41,252 Hey, fellas. 1828 02:01:41,669 --> 02:01:43,087 You're going to give us the code. 1829 02:01:43,170 --> 02:01:44,964 [gasps] Mmm. 1830 02:01:45,047 --> 02:01:46,382 Or what? 1831 02:01:46,465 --> 02:01:48,676 'Cause you don't seem like the kind of gentlemen 1832 02:01:48,759 --> 02:01:51,137 who would hurt a lady. 1833 02:01:54,181 --> 02:01:56,809 Perhaps not. Call me old-fashioned… 1834 02:01:56,976 --> 02:01:59,103 I don't consider genocide especially ladylike. 1835 02:01:59,186 --> 02:02:01,897 Right. Enough small talk. 1836 02:02:04,233 --> 02:02:05,276 Give us the code. 1837 02:02:05,401 --> 02:02:06,736 Sure. 1838 02:02:06,819 --> 02:02:08,904 No. I don't think so. 1839 02:02:09,655 --> 02:02:10,698 Ooh! 1840 02:02:13,200 --> 02:02:14,285 Ow! 1841 02:02:18,998 --> 02:02:20,041 Heroin. 1842 02:02:20,750 --> 02:02:21,792 You know, where I come from, 1843 02:02:21,876 --> 02:02:24,128 this shit you've been peddling's ruined a lot of lives. 1844 02:02:25,338 --> 02:02:26,964 But yours is even more deadly. 1845 02:02:27,548 --> 02:02:29,592 But it feels so nice, it's gonna make you 1846 02:02:29,675 --> 02:02:31,344 -lower your guard. -Mmm. 1847 02:02:31,427 --> 02:02:35,056 Our colleague, Merlin, may he rest in peace, 1848 02:02:35,139 --> 02:02:37,475 managed to synthesize your horrible little formula 1849 02:02:37,558 --> 02:02:38,893 and speed up its effects. 1850 02:02:38,976 --> 02:02:41,937 So I would say you have just under eight minutes 1851 02:02:42,021 --> 02:02:44,732 before paralysis sets in and your breathing stops. 1852 02:02:44,815 --> 02:02:47,651 But, of course, you know all about that. 1853 02:02:47,735 --> 02:02:48,944 [Eggsy] So here's the deal. 1854 02:02:49,070 --> 02:02:52,114 You release the antidote worldwide, and we make sure you get a dose. 1855 02:02:52,198 --> 02:02:54,408 I have to give you the code to live? 1856 02:02:54,492 --> 02:02:57,745 Honey, you're so smart. You should work for me. 1857 02:02:57,828 --> 02:02:59,371 Right. Give us the code. 1858 02:03:00,581 --> 02:03:04,126 Why not? The decree's getting signed soon… [sniffs] 1859 02:03:04,293 --> 02:03:05,920 Anyhoo. Um… 1860 02:03:06,712 --> 02:03:08,923 It's "Viva las vegan." 1861 02:03:10,049 --> 02:03:11,175 Get it? 1862 02:03:11,759 --> 02:03:14,303 "Viva las…" 1863 02:03:14,387 --> 02:03:15,596 Mmm. 1864 02:03:16,847 --> 02:03:18,682 [slurring] Come snuggle with me. 1865 02:03:19,642 --> 02:03:21,477 I like you. 1866 02:03:23,771 --> 02:03:25,773 [distorted] I don't think that's terribly likely. 1867 02:03:26,524 --> 02:03:28,901 [laughing] 1868 02:03:48,045 --> 02:03:49,088 She's OD'd. 1869 02:03:49,255 --> 02:03:50,548 You gave her too much. 1870 02:03:50,631 --> 02:03:51,882 Did I? 1871 02:03:52,424 --> 02:03:53,592 You know, I really don't have 1872 02:03:53,676 --> 02:03:54,802 as much experience with all this drug stuff 1873 02:03:54,885 --> 02:03:55,886 as people think. 1874 02:03:56,720 --> 02:03:57,888 Better be the right code. 1875 02:04:00,433 --> 02:04:01,600 [sighs] 1876 02:04:01,684 --> 02:04:05,229 "Viva las…" 1877 02:04:05,312 --> 02:04:06,438 So? 1878 02:04:10,151 --> 02:04:11,527 Don't move, kid. 1879 02:04:11,610 --> 02:04:14,530 You try anything funny, and I'll turn this thing electric. 1880 02:04:15,656 --> 02:04:18,200 Now give up your guns, fellas. Slide 'em over. 1881 02:04:23,831 --> 02:04:24,832 Whiskey. 1882 02:04:24,957 --> 02:04:26,792 We are all on the same side here. 1883 02:04:26,876 --> 02:04:27,877 You've had a head injury. 1884 02:04:28,002 --> 02:04:29,712 The exact same thing happened to Harry. 1885 02:04:29,795 --> 02:04:32,089 You're havin' some sort of brain glitch. 1886 02:04:32,173 --> 02:04:35,009 Nope. My brain's all good, kid. 1887 02:04:35,676 --> 02:04:37,136 And you know what? 1888 02:04:37,219 --> 02:04:40,473 I reckon the same was true for your friend Harry over here. 1889 02:04:41,015 --> 02:04:43,726 Real fine instincts, I'll give him that. 1890 02:04:43,809 --> 02:04:46,437 So stay still or I'll dice him up so small, 1891 02:04:46,520 --> 02:04:47,605 you can take him home in a bucket, 1892 02:04:47,688 --> 02:04:50,357 and still have room for what's left of your buddy, Merlin. 1893 02:04:51,650 --> 02:04:54,320 Well, that's just fucking great. You're working for the president? 1894 02:04:54,778 --> 02:04:57,281 That asshole? [chuckles] 1895 02:04:57,364 --> 02:05:01,285 Hell no. It's a matter of personal principle, agent. 1896 02:05:01,368 --> 02:05:03,370 No more drug users. 1897 02:05:04,121 --> 02:05:06,957 And the Statesman share price rockets. 1898 02:05:08,542 --> 02:05:11,462 So those are your principles? Making money? 1899 02:05:11,962 --> 02:05:15,341 Our agencies were founded to uphold peace, to protect the innocent. 1900 02:05:15,424 --> 02:05:17,468 Do you wanna know who was innocent? 1901 02:05:17,551 --> 02:05:20,304 My high school sweetheart. 1902 02:05:20,888 --> 02:05:22,139 Love of my life. 1903 02:05:22,973 --> 02:05:24,600 Pregnant with my little boy. 1904 02:05:25,726 --> 02:05:27,311 He'd be about your age now, 1905 02:05:27,728 --> 02:05:29,647 if his mama hadn't got caught in the crossfire 1906 02:05:29,730 --> 02:05:30,773 when two meth head freaks 1907 02:05:30,856 --> 02:05:33,692 decided to rob a fucking convenience store. 1908 02:05:35,945 --> 02:05:38,155 A world without those people in it, 1909 02:05:39,615 --> 02:05:41,242 sure smells like peace to me. 1910 02:05:42,910 --> 02:05:44,245 You break the law, 1911 02:05:44,912 --> 02:05:46,539 you pay the price. 1912 02:05:47,581 --> 02:05:49,250 Good riddance 1913 02:05:49,667 --> 02:05:51,752 to all of them. 1914 02:05:56,674 --> 02:05:59,134 That's why I got to destroy that case. 1915 02:06:00,052 --> 02:06:03,430 Now slide it over, Agent Galahad. 1916 02:06:08,519 --> 02:06:09,520 Thank you. 1917 02:06:10,062 --> 02:06:11,272 Do you know what, Harry? 1918 02:06:12,064 --> 02:06:13,148 I think he's got a point. 1919 02:06:15,943 --> 02:06:19,071 I think it sounds like a bright idea. 1920 02:06:19,822 --> 02:06:20,823 [beeps] 1921 02:06:28,872 --> 02:06:30,499 [crackling] 1922 02:06:35,045 --> 02:06:37,214 [The BossHoss' "Word Up" playing] 1923 02:06:49,810 --> 02:06:51,228 [grunting] 1924 02:07:07,328 --> 02:07:09,288 [grunting] 1925 02:07:28,724 --> 02:07:29,975 [both grunting] 1926 02:07:31,560 --> 02:07:32,603 [groans] 1927 02:07:39,568 --> 02:07:41,278 [both grunting] 1928 02:07:52,039 --> 02:07:53,290 [choking] 1929 02:08:35,958 --> 02:08:39,795 Put alpha gel on that, dickhead. 1930 02:08:41,255 --> 02:08:42,256 [lock clicks] 1931 02:08:49,930 --> 02:08:51,432 "Viva las vegan." 1932 02:08:52,266 --> 02:08:53,600 [beeps] 1933 02:08:53,684 --> 02:08:54,810 [Eggsy] This one's for you, Merlin. 1934 02:09:09,575 --> 02:09:13,203 It's a day of worldwide celebration as millions rejoice, 1935 02:09:13,287 --> 02:09:16,498 after they or their loved ones were saved from death. 1936 02:09:18,917 --> 02:09:20,252 [mother sighs] 1937 02:09:22,546 --> 02:09:25,257 [parents exclaiming] 1938 02:09:28,635 --> 02:09:31,096 [news anchor] Distribution of the antidote continues, 1939 02:09:31,263 --> 02:09:33,098 and field hospitals are emptying 1940 02:09:33,182 --> 02:09:36,351 as victims return to their homes tonight, cured. 1941 02:09:57,664 --> 02:09:59,917 Come on, Liam. Man, come on. 1942 02:10:00,000 --> 02:10:02,336 Yes! Yes! Yes! 1943 02:10:03,045 --> 02:10:04,254 Yes, bruv! 1944 02:10:04,338 --> 02:10:05,923 [both laughing] 1945 02:10:08,091 --> 02:10:09,593 -I love you, man! -I love you! 1946 02:10:09,676 --> 02:10:11,637 I'm never touching that shit again! 1947 02:10:15,098 --> 02:10:16,099 What happened? 1948 02:10:17,768 --> 02:10:19,937 -Did I miss something? -You sure did. 1949 02:10:20,062 --> 02:10:23,982 From now on, Tequila, I suggest you stick to booze. 1950 02:10:26,777 --> 02:10:28,445 [Fox] The president actively sanctioned 1951 02:10:28,529 --> 02:10:31,573 the deaths of hundreds of millions of people, 1952 02:10:32,407 --> 02:10:34,243 and lied to the public. 1953 02:10:35,077 --> 02:10:38,247 I am proud to be responsible for his impeachment, 1954 02:10:38,330 --> 02:10:42,459 and I will do everything I can to ensure a smooth transition of power. 1955 02:10:43,710 --> 02:10:46,255 [Champ] In honor of this historic occasion, 1956 02:10:46,338 --> 02:10:47,631 we have purchased 1957 02:10:48,924 --> 02:10:50,634 a distillery in Scotland. 1958 02:10:51,134 --> 02:10:52,177 [uncorks bottle] 1959 02:10:52,261 --> 02:10:53,679 This shows the world 1960 02:10:53,762 --> 02:10:58,350 that Kingsman is now joining the liquor business. 1961 02:10:59,142 --> 02:11:00,644 Before we were cousins. 1962 02:11:01,603 --> 02:11:04,982 Now we're brothers, working side-by-side. 1963 02:11:05,899 --> 02:11:08,986 All our resources are now yours. 1964 02:11:09,069 --> 02:11:10,279 You can rebuild. 1965 02:11:11,446 --> 02:11:13,323 Yeah, y'all shittin' in high cotton now. 1966 02:11:13,407 --> 02:11:14,533 -[chuckles] -[clinks bottle] 1967 02:11:14,616 --> 02:11:16,702 Agent Tequila, this is a formal occasion. 1968 02:11:16,827 --> 02:11:18,579 Where's your tie and jacket? 1969 02:11:18,662 --> 02:11:19,705 Sorry, sir. 1970 02:11:19,871 --> 02:11:23,542 Maybe the Kingsman boys can dress you properly. 1971 02:11:24,668 --> 02:11:26,128 To our union! 1972 02:11:27,212 --> 02:11:28,213 [all] To our union! 1973 02:11:30,090 --> 02:11:31,341 [sniffling] 1974 02:11:32,259 --> 02:11:34,011 Final order of business, 1975 02:11:35,012 --> 02:11:36,513 we would be honored 1976 02:11:36,597 --> 02:11:39,975 if one of you would be our new Agent Whiskey. 1977 02:11:40,058 --> 02:11:44,563 Yeah, this two Galahad thing is just fucking confusing. 1978 02:11:44,938 --> 02:11:46,064 [both hesitating] 1979 02:11:46,148 --> 02:11:47,441 Well, I'm very honored… 1980 02:11:49,818 --> 02:11:50,819 Champ… 1981 02:11:52,821 --> 02:11:54,823 I'd like to throw my hat in the ring. 1982 02:11:59,161 --> 02:12:00,245 All right! 1983 02:12:01,538 --> 02:12:02,706 Statesmen, the vote. 1984 02:12:05,959 --> 02:12:07,544 Looks like she's in. 1985 02:12:07,961 --> 02:12:09,087 Have a seat. 1986 02:12:10,380 --> 02:12:11,465 [chuckles] 1987 02:12:13,759 --> 02:12:15,427 To Agent Whiskey! 1988 02:12:15,510 --> 02:12:16,678 Agent Whiskey! 1989 02:12:24,186 --> 02:12:25,270 Cheers! 1990 02:12:30,317 --> 02:12:32,569 Are you sure I don't look like a dick? 1991 02:12:35,447 --> 02:12:36,531 Look in the mirror. 1992 02:12:42,579 --> 02:12:43,789 What do you see? 1993 02:12:44,081 --> 02:12:47,417 Someone who can't believe what the fuck is going on. 1994 02:12:47,501 --> 02:12:48,502 [sighs] 1995 02:12:48,835 --> 02:12:50,504 I see a man who is honorable, 1996 02:12:52,756 --> 02:12:53,840 brave, 1997 02:12:54,716 --> 02:12:55,884 loyal, 1998 02:12:56,593 --> 02:12:58,679 who's fulfilled his huge potential. 1999 02:13:00,514 --> 02:13:02,724 A man who's done something good with his life. 2000 02:13:04,101 --> 02:13:06,144 I owe you everything, Harry. 2001 02:13:07,479 --> 02:13:08,480 Thank you. 2002 02:13:09,022 --> 02:13:10,148 Don't mention it. 2003 02:13:11,483 --> 02:13:12,484 You ready? 2004 02:13:15,445 --> 02:13:17,364 Not a doubt in my mind. 2005 02:13:55,819 --> 02:13:57,821 [all cheering] 2006 02:14:09,207 --> 02:14:12,044 [Harry] As one of our founding Kingsman once said, 2007 02:14:12,127 --> 02:14:13,378 this is not the end. 2008 02:14:14,129 --> 02:14:16,798 It is not even the beginning of the end. 2009 02:14:17,340 --> 02:14:21,678 But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning. 2010 02:14:22,387 --> 02:14:23,722 Yeah! 2011 02:15:08,308 --> 02:15:10,685 [heroic music playing] 2012 02:15:13,021 --> 02:15:15,941 [country music playing] 139576

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