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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:04,003 ? Dramatic music playing ? 2 00:00:08,509 --> 00:00:11,512 ? theme playing ? 3 00:00:37,079 --> 00:00:40,999 ? 4 00:00:42,668 --> 00:00:45,795 - I'm surprised you didn't call in sick this morning, Fry. 5 00:00:45,796 --> 00:00:47,755 Isn't it a special day? 6 00:00:47,756 --> 00:00:49,298 - No, just my birthday. 7 00:00:49,299 --> 00:00:53,094 All I want is to enjoy the quiet desolation of space 8 00:00:53,095 --> 00:00:54,847 for a few peaceful hours. 9 00:00:55,597 --> 00:00:58,058 ALL: Surprise! [party favor blowing] 10 00:00:58,934 --> 00:01:01,310 - Uh, 'kay. This really wasn't... 11 00:01:01,311 --> 00:01:03,563 - Happys birthdays! - Happy whatchacallit! 12 00:01:03,564 --> 00:01:05,189 - Surprise! - Surprise! 13 00:01:05,190 --> 00:01:07,733 [dribbling] - Happy B-day, Fry. 14 00:01:07,734 --> 00:01:10,069 - Jeez. How many people did you invite? 15 00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:12,405 - Only a few. Less than 40. 16 00:01:12,406 --> 00:01:14,448 MORE GUESTS: Surprise! 17 00:01:14,449 --> 00:01:16,284 [floor squeaks] - Surprise, sailor. 18 00:01:16,285 --> 00:01:18,661 - [sighs] Thanks, everyone. 19 00:01:18,662 --> 00:01:20,162 - What's the matter, Fry? 20 00:01:20,163 --> 00:01:22,456 You look sick and so darn blue. 21 00:01:22,457 --> 00:01:24,417 - Chicken cordon bleu!? B'kaw! 22 00:01:24,418 --> 00:01:27,671 - I don't wanna talk about it. [sniffles] 23 00:01:28,505 --> 00:01:29,755 [sighs, sniffles] 24 00:01:29,756 --> 00:01:31,924 [megaphone feedback] - Attention, party people. 25 00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:35,428 We got a code 99. Birthday boy unresponsive. 26 00:01:35,429 --> 00:01:36,679 - We need backup. 27 00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:39,891 So, I'ma turn the music back up. [clicking, whirring] 28 00:01:39,892 --> 00:01:41,559 ? disco music playing ? 29 00:01:41,560 --> 00:01:44,563 [cheering] 30 00:01:45,647 --> 00:01:47,398 - Hey! Please, just... 31 00:01:47,399 --> 00:01:48,774 [cheering] 32 00:01:48,775 --> 00:01:50,693 [ship creaking, crashes] [alarm blaring] 33 00:01:50,694 --> 00:01:53,613 - Emergency! All butts to battle cushions! 34 00:01:53,614 --> 00:01:56,908 [engines straining] 35 00:01:56,909 --> 00:01:58,534 We're being pulled off-course 36 00:01:58,535 --> 00:02:00,703 by some huge gravitational force! 37 00:02:00,704 --> 00:02:01,996 A black hole! 38 00:02:01,997 --> 00:02:03,247 ? Dramatic sting ? 39 00:02:03,248 --> 00:02:04,957 - Scruffy begs to differ. 40 00:02:04,958 --> 00:02:06,918 I see it as more of a gray-brown, 41 00:02:06,919 --> 00:02:09,086 or perhaps toasted umber. 42 00:02:09,087 --> 00:02:10,630 - Impact in three! 43 00:02:10,631 --> 00:02:11,632 I mean, one! 44 00:02:13,091 --> 00:02:16,594 [all screaming] 45 00:02:16,595 --> 00:02:18,846 [ship creaks] [all groaning] 46 00:02:18,847 --> 00:02:21,933 - Is everybody okay? 'Cause I'm not. 47 00:02:21,934 --> 00:02:24,102 [wind blowing] 48 00:02:25,854 --> 00:02:27,772 - Coming out! [clanging] 49 00:02:27,773 --> 00:02:30,067 Ow! [spitting] 50 00:02:31,360 --> 00:02:33,361 [fizzling, whirring] 51 00:02:33,362 --> 00:02:36,365 ? eerie music playing ? 52 00:02:41,286 --> 00:02:43,913 - We heard a girlish scream. Are you okay? 53 00:02:43,914 --> 00:02:45,414 - Did anyone else see that? 54 00:02:45,415 --> 00:02:47,416 - No. I was busy making a tourniquet 55 00:02:47,417 --> 00:02:49,252 out of my tiny, tiny shirt. 56 00:02:49,253 --> 00:02:53,130 - What kind of hellhole has Leela brought us to this time? 57 00:02:53,131 --> 00:02:55,883 - A barren wasteland devoid of life. 58 00:02:55,884 --> 00:02:58,135 Like Fire Island after Labor Day. 59 00:02:58,136 --> 00:03:00,012 There's literally nothing here. 60 00:03:00,013 --> 00:03:02,265 Except that tasteless suburban teardown. 61 00:03:02,266 --> 00:03:03,641 ? 62 00:03:03,642 --> 00:03:06,978 - [gasps] That's the tasteless suburban teardown I grew up in! 63 00:03:06,979 --> 00:03:08,230 [door opens, creaks] 64 00:03:08,730 --> 00:03:10,231 Whoa, weird. 65 00:03:10,232 --> 00:03:12,900 I was just repressing a memory of this. 66 00:03:12,901 --> 00:03:16,445 It's set up exactly like my 8th birthday party. 67 00:03:16,446 --> 00:03:19,699 The theme was Game Night Afternoon. 68 00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:22,703 ? Mystical music playing ? 69 00:03:24,872 --> 00:03:26,205 - What's wrong, son? 70 00:03:26,206 --> 00:03:28,207 Worried about our boys in Grenada? 71 00:03:28,208 --> 00:03:31,669 - No. It's just I-I'm not very good at games, Dad. 72 00:03:31,670 --> 00:03:33,796 I don't wanna lose on my birthday. 73 00:03:33,797 --> 00:03:35,089 - Oh, don't worry. 74 00:03:35,090 --> 00:03:37,508 Not everything in life is about winning. 75 00:03:37,509 --> 00:03:40,303 But most things are. Almost everything. 76 00:03:40,304 --> 00:03:41,388 [knocking] 77 00:03:42,347 --> 00:03:45,183 FRIENDS: Whoa! Happy birthday! 78 00:03:45,184 --> 00:03:46,767 - Here's Josh Gedgie! 79 00:03:46,768 --> 00:03:48,478 High five, best bud! 80 00:03:48,979 --> 00:03:50,730 - Oh! So close! 81 00:03:50,731 --> 00:03:53,149 [both laughing] 82 00:03:53,150 --> 00:03:54,275 ? 83 00:03:54,276 --> 00:03:57,737 I can't believe it. Everything is exactly how it was, 84 00:03:57,738 --> 00:04:00,489 right down to the two-liter bottle of Dr. Peeper. 85 00:04:00,490 --> 00:04:02,575 - What kind of weirdos would go to the trouble 86 00:04:02,576 --> 00:04:06,037 of recreating a low-budget store brand birthday party? 87 00:04:06,038 --> 00:04:08,414 - It was we! [whirring] 88 00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:09,916 [all gasp] 89 00:04:09,917 --> 00:04:12,168 - He meant us. It was us! 90 00:04:12,169 --> 00:04:14,253 - I don't know. I thought "we" sounded better. 91 00:04:14,254 --> 00:04:15,880 - Look, never mind the grammar. 92 00:04:15,881 --> 00:04:18,466 How did you big-heads get my old house here? 93 00:04:18,467 --> 00:04:20,760 - I'ds likes to hears about the grammars. 94 00:04:20,761 --> 00:04:23,971 - Recreating Fry's house was mere child's play, 95 00:04:23,972 --> 00:04:27,391 thanks to the power of our machine. Behold! 96 00:04:27,392 --> 00:04:29,143 ? Dramatic sting ? 97 00:04:29,144 --> 00:04:31,437 It scours the minds of visitors 98 00:04:31,438 --> 00:04:34,190 for powerful memories of conflict. 99 00:04:34,191 --> 00:04:36,567 - And recreates those conflicts 100 00:04:36,568 --> 00:04:38,361 in every detail! 101 00:04:38,362 --> 00:04:40,279 - Today, we shall reenact 102 00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:43,241 Philip J. Fry's 8th birthday party, 103 00:04:43,242 --> 00:04:47,745 including all the thrilling children's games he played! 104 00:04:47,746 --> 00:04:50,998 - I do enjoy Twister. 105 00:04:50,999 --> 00:04:54,168 - No Twister! You wouldn't believe what the mean kids used to twist. 106 00:04:54,169 --> 00:04:56,796 - Then, we shall begin with the classic 107 00:04:56,797 --> 00:04:59,173 yet copyright-free game 108 00:04:59,174 --> 00:05:01,676 Barrel of Primates! 109 00:05:01,677 --> 00:05:04,804 ? Mystical music playing ? 110 00:05:04,805 --> 00:05:07,098 - Who's ready to link monkey parts? 111 00:05:07,099 --> 00:05:08,266 KIDS: I am! Me! 112 00:05:08,267 --> 00:05:11,185 - They call me Monkey Breath for a reason. 113 00:05:11,186 --> 00:05:12,854 - Longest chain wins. 114 00:05:12,855 --> 00:05:15,690 Players, start your chains! 115 00:05:15,691 --> 00:05:17,275 [plastic clattering] 116 00:05:17,276 --> 00:05:20,946 ? tense music playing ? 117 00:05:21,947 --> 00:05:24,907 - You shall play as two traditional teams 118 00:05:24,908 --> 00:05:26,784 of 17! 119 00:05:26,785 --> 00:05:29,412 - Only instead of boring plastic pieces, 120 00:05:29,413 --> 00:05:31,539 you shall be the primates. 121 00:05:31,540 --> 00:05:33,291 ? Dramatic sting ? 122 00:05:33,292 --> 00:05:35,293 Kindly enter the barrels when ready. [beep] 123 00:05:35,294 --> 00:05:38,630 [hissing, whirring] [yelling] 124 00:05:39,923 --> 00:05:41,967 - I'm ready now. [snorts] 125 00:05:45,179 --> 00:05:48,181 - Let the game begin! 126 00:05:48,182 --> 00:05:49,932 - Uh, okay. 127 00:05:49,933 --> 00:05:51,351 We should probably obey the heads. 128 00:05:53,020 --> 00:05:55,480 - [giggling] This is kind of fun. 129 00:05:56,940 --> 00:05:58,983 - Dang. You must work out a lot. 130 00:05:58,984 --> 00:06:01,986 - I'm a leg. Every day is leg day. 131 00:06:01,987 --> 00:06:04,113 ? Mysterious music playing ? 132 00:06:04,114 --> 00:06:08,075 [pained groaning, murmuring] 133 00:06:08,076 --> 00:06:11,829 - I don't remember this being so hard when I was 8. Oh... 134 00:06:11,830 --> 00:06:14,833 [groaning continues] 135 00:06:17,127 --> 00:06:19,795 - Did we mention there's a twist? 136 00:06:19,796 --> 00:06:22,965 - I knew you were twist guys! [beep, hiss] 137 00:06:22,966 --> 00:06:25,426 ? dramatic music playing ? 138 00:06:25,427 --> 00:06:27,637 - Oh, great. A pool of acid? 139 00:06:27,638 --> 00:06:30,056 - No. We're not monsters! 140 00:06:30,057 --> 00:06:33,684 - It's actually a highly alkaline liquid. 141 00:06:33,685 --> 00:06:34,894 That's the twist! 142 00:06:34,895 --> 00:06:37,480 It'll dissolve you twice as fast as acid! 143 00:06:37,481 --> 00:06:39,649 - But I have a fear of dissolving! 144 00:06:39,650 --> 00:06:41,275 How do we get down from here? 145 00:06:41,276 --> 00:06:43,736 - By falling, of course. 146 00:06:43,737 --> 00:06:44,946 [all gasp] 147 00:06:44,947 --> 00:06:46,739 For in another twist, 148 00:06:46,740 --> 00:06:49,575 these party games shall be... 149 00:06:49,576 --> 00:06:51,118 to the death! 150 00:06:51,119 --> 00:06:52,495 ? Dramatic sting ? 151 00:06:52,496 --> 00:06:55,165 MRS. WONG: Although we kinda guessed that from the bones. 152 00:06:56,166 --> 00:06:59,335 ? Light music playing ? 153 00:06:59,336 --> 00:07:01,712 - Ooh, and it's a real barn-burner! 154 00:07:01,713 --> 00:07:03,422 Phil's the sentimental favorite, 155 00:07:03,423 --> 00:07:05,842 but the smart money's on four-eyes. 156 00:07:05,843 --> 00:07:08,594 - The name's Gedgie, and it may look close, 157 00:07:08,595 --> 00:07:10,806 but I've got the Gedge. 158 00:07:12,599 --> 00:07:14,517 [kids gasp] - Fry's still in it! 159 00:07:14,518 --> 00:07:15,519 Ah-choo! 160 00:07:16,103 --> 00:07:17,603 - Look at him hook! 161 00:07:17,604 --> 00:07:20,690 - Impressive, but my superior dexterity will... 162 00:07:20,691 --> 00:07:22,441 [stammering] Aah! 163 00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:23,485 [crash] 164 00:07:23,944 --> 00:07:26,654 - I... w-won at something? 165 00:07:26,655 --> 00:07:29,532 I hope my grandma's proud of me down in Hell. 166 00:07:29,533 --> 00:07:31,742 - [sighs] Nice job, Phil, 167 00:07:31,743 --> 00:07:34,370 but I'll Gedge you next time. [laughs] 168 00:07:34,371 --> 00:07:36,373 - [giggling] That never gets old. 169 00:07:37,666 --> 00:07:39,584 ? Dramatic music playing ? 170 00:07:39,585 --> 00:07:42,588 [all groaning, wailing] 171 00:07:44,173 --> 00:07:47,008 - I say, I say, I don't know how much longer 172 00:07:47,009 --> 00:07:49,719 these old hollow bird bones can hold out. 173 00:07:49,720 --> 00:07:51,846 - Why did you monsters dream this up? 174 00:07:51,847 --> 00:07:53,431 And are the streaming rights available? 175 00:07:53,432 --> 00:07:56,100 - Our motivations are three. 176 00:07:56,101 --> 00:07:57,935 Mine is to gain knowledge 177 00:07:57,936 --> 00:08:00,146 by making people crash on our planet 178 00:08:00,147 --> 00:08:03,441 and subjecting them to bizarre experiments! 179 00:08:03,442 --> 00:08:06,777 - As for me, I don't have any motivations. 180 00:08:06,778 --> 00:08:09,614 - And I have two motivations! 181 00:08:09,615 --> 00:08:13,409 Gambling, and making these cool masks. 182 00:08:13,410 --> 00:08:16,621 Let the gambling begin! 183 00:08:16,622 --> 00:08:19,832 - Fifty quids on the red team. 184 00:08:19,833 --> 00:08:22,293 - A hundred quids on blue! 185 00:08:22,294 --> 00:08:24,170 - [gasps] Listen up, people! 186 00:08:24,171 --> 00:08:27,924 If we're going to survive, we all need to work together! 187 00:08:27,925 --> 00:08:30,426 - Or we can shake the other team's bar 188 00:08:30,427 --> 00:08:32,553 and make those losers fall first! 189 00:08:32,554 --> 00:08:35,056 - I vote for the shaking thing. 190 00:08:35,057 --> 00:08:37,558 [blue team groaning] [Bender laughing] 191 00:08:37,559 --> 00:08:39,977 [wailing, yelling] 192 00:08:39,978 --> 00:08:42,855 - Cut it out, Bender! Cheating is against the rules! 193 00:08:42,856 --> 00:08:44,982 - There are no rules. 194 00:08:44,983 --> 00:08:46,443 Oh wait. Here are the rules. 195 00:08:48,362 --> 00:08:51,656 It just says, "Fun for ages 3 to 99." 196 00:08:51,657 --> 00:08:53,950 - No wonder I'm not enjoying it! 197 00:08:53,951 --> 00:08:56,244 - Now, hold on a minute. 198 00:08:56,245 --> 00:08:58,120 According to the laws of calculus, 199 00:08:58,121 --> 00:09:00,873 we might just be able to link chains 200 00:09:00,874 --> 00:09:03,709 to form a stable structure known as a catenary. 201 00:09:03,710 --> 00:09:04,919 [crack] [yelps] 202 00:09:04,920 --> 00:09:07,839 Damn! My dribbling and differentiating arm! 203 00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:09,590 [blue team screaming] 204 00:09:09,591 --> 00:09:11,593 [splashing] 205 00:09:13,595 --> 00:09:14,595 - Ah! 206 00:09:14,596 --> 00:09:17,849 - Is okay. Is only water. Just as I foresaw. 207 00:09:17,850 --> 00:09:19,684 [sizzling] Oh. Oh, wait. 208 00:09:19,685 --> 00:09:21,185 [yelping] 209 00:09:21,186 --> 00:09:24,857 ? Squid Game -esque vocalizing ? 210 00:09:26,567 --> 00:09:28,652 [all gasping, murmuring] 211 00:09:29,653 --> 00:09:30,862 [Amy crying] 212 00:09:30,863 --> 00:09:33,781 - That game was not fun! 213 00:09:33,782 --> 00:09:36,033 - Congratulations to the red team! 214 00:09:36,034 --> 00:09:39,036 I'm sure you'll all want to celebrate with some birthday cake. 215 00:09:39,037 --> 00:09:40,121 [Leela crying] 216 00:09:40,122 --> 00:09:43,124 - My parents and my grandmother a-are dead! 217 00:09:43,125 --> 00:09:44,584 [sobbing] 218 00:09:44,585 --> 00:09:47,253 - I'm so sorry for your loss, Leela. 219 00:09:47,254 --> 00:09:48,713 Can I have their cake? 220 00:09:48,714 --> 00:09:50,716 ? Dramatic music playing ? 221 00:09:54,928 --> 00:09:56,846 - Where'd you get the snazzy candles? 222 00:09:56,847 --> 00:09:58,681 - Our machine made them! 223 00:09:58,682 --> 00:09:59,682 - Oh, right, right. 224 00:10:01,602 --> 00:10:05,062 GAMESTER 1: The next game is a simple one. 225 00:10:05,063 --> 00:10:08,566 Fry must blow out all the candles 226 00:10:08,567 --> 00:10:10,985 in a single breath. 227 00:10:10,986 --> 00:10:12,153 - I can do that. 228 00:10:12,154 --> 00:10:14,405 - But, there's a twist. 229 00:10:14,406 --> 00:10:17,325 - I like a good twist. That's what keeps the audience watching. 230 00:10:17,326 --> 00:10:21,037 - For each candle Fry doesn't blow out, 231 00:10:21,038 --> 00:10:24,999 the corresponding player will die! 232 00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:26,667 - W-Wait, what, what, what? 233 00:10:26,668 --> 00:10:30,214 - Don't worry, guys. I'm actually, like, really good at this. 234 00:10:30,797 --> 00:10:31,797 [deep inhale] 235 00:10:31,798 --> 00:10:33,132 ? mystical music playing ? 236 00:10:33,133 --> 00:10:34,133 [deep inhale continues] 237 00:10:34,134 --> 00:10:36,802 - [scoffs] That's a lot of candles, old man. 238 00:10:36,803 --> 00:10:37,970 You'll never do it. 239 00:10:37,971 --> 00:10:40,473 [inhales, blows] 240 00:10:40,474 --> 00:10:42,892 ? 241 00:10:42,893 --> 00:10:44,143 [blowing] 242 00:10:44,144 --> 00:10:45,229 ? dramatic sting ? 243 00:10:46,647 --> 00:10:48,232 [grunting] 244 00:10:49,733 --> 00:10:52,068 [panting] [kids cheer] 245 00:10:52,069 --> 00:10:53,444 - Good going, brother! 246 00:10:53,445 --> 00:10:55,154 [blowing] 247 00:10:55,155 --> 00:10:58,032 - Come on, gas bag! Blow your face off! 248 00:10:58,033 --> 00:11:00,953 - No fair! I got about 12 wicks! 249 00:11:05,749 --> 00:11:08,501 - Uh... look! 250 00:11:08,502 --> 00:11:10,378 He's still blowing somehow! 251 00:11:10,379 --> 00:11:11,838 It's going out! [snip] 252 00:11:11,839 --> 00:11:13,047 [fire roaring] [Zoidberg whooping] 253 00:11:13,048 --> 00:11:14,423 [all gasp] 254 00:11:14,424 --> 00:11:15,466 ? 255 00:11:15,467 --> 00:11:19,179 My only regret is not getting any cake! 256 00:11:22,182 --> 00:11:25,685 ? Pop Goes the Weasel playing ? 257 00:11:25,686 --> 00:11:27,521 [cranking] 258 00:11:28,480 --> 00:11:31,190 [creaking] 259 00:11:31,191 --> 00:11:33,526 ? mystical music playing ? 260 00:11:33,527 --> 00:11:34,735 - And the winner 261 00:11:34,736 --> 00:11:38,114 of the Tri-State Musical Chairs Championship 262 00:11:38,115 --> 00:11:40,867 is Philip J. Fry! 263 00:11:40,868 --> 00:11:43,369 Yay! 264 00:11:43,370 --> 00:11:46,873 ? Pop Goes the Weasel continues ? 265 00:11:46,874 --> 00:11:49,625 - [groans] It's been six hours. 266 00:11:49,626 --> 00:11:52,044 Can't you at least play something a little catchier? 267 00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:55,464 - No. We have one song, and we really like it. 268 00:11:55,465 --> 00:11:58,467 [creaking] 269 00:11:58,468 --> 00:11:59,844 ? song stops ? 270 00:11:59,845 --> 00:12:01,846 - Oh, breadcrumbs. 271 00:12:01,847 --> 00:12:04,307 - Nobody panic! Two to a seat! 272 00:12:04,308 --> 00:12:06,767 - You heard her! Start panicking! Ah! 273 00:12:06,768 --> 00:12:08,811 [all yelling] 274 00:12:08,812 --> 00:12:10,479 - Oh! Oh! [grunts] 275 00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:13,983 [muttering] 276 00:12:13,984 --> 00:12:15,235 [squishing] 277 00:12:16,069 --> 00:12:17,486 - Ow! Mom! 278 00:12:17,487 --> 00:12:19,405 ? Squid Game -esque vocalizing ? 279 00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:21,157 - Ah! B'kaw! 280 00:12:21,158 --> 00:12:25,120 [nervous murmuring] 281 00:12:25,913 --> 00:12:28,915 [weasel snarling] 282 00:12:28,916 --> 00:12:30,082 [roars] 283 00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:33,086 [screaming] 284 00:12:34,588 --> 00:12:36,380 [slurps] 285 00:12:36,381 --> 00:12:37,883 [belches] 286 00:12:38,342 --> 00:12:39,592 [growls] 287 00:12:39,593 --> 00:12:43,262 [whimpering, shivering] 288 00:12:43,263 --> 00:12:45,389 - Who likes pi๏ฟฝatas? 289 00:12:45,390 --> 00:12:48,477 ? Mystical music playing ? 290 00:12:50,938 --> 00:12:52,730 [groaning, yelps] [body thuds] 291 00:12:52,731 --> 00:12:54,732 - Good try, Bartholomew. 292 00:12:54,733 --> 00:12:56,235 - No, it wasn't. 293 00:13:00,364 --> 00:13:03,282 [grunting] 294 00:13:03,283 --> 00:13:05,660 - [scoffs] That's impossible. 295 00:13:05,661 --> 00:13:07,995 It'd take all three Hulks to break that. 296 00:13:07,996 --> 00:13:10,791 Incredible, She, and Hogan. 297 00:13:12,042 --> 00:13:13,042 [grunting] 298 00:13:13,043 --> 00:13:14,043 ? 299 00:13:14,044 --> 00:13:17,296 - That's the first time I ever swung a bat and hit something! 300 00:13:17,297 --> 00:13:18,965 ? Tense music playing ? 301 00:13:18,966 --> 00:13:20,883 [beep] [whirring] 302 00:13:20,884 --> 00:13:23,261 GAMESTER 2: Since no one likes candy, 303 00:13:23,262 --> 00:13:26,556 we have filled our pi๏ฟฝata with quids! 304 00:13:26,557 --> 00:13:27,807 - I like candy. 305 00:13:27,808 --> 00:13:28,850 [groans] 306 00:13:28,851 --> 00:13:32,103 - [wails] My husband is dead! 307 00:13:32,104 --> 00:13:34,230 I can't go on! 308 00:13:34,231 --> 00:13:35,732 - Okay. [beep] 309 00:13:36,149 --> 00:13:37,650 [bones crunch] [grunts] 310 00:13:37,651 --> 00:13:39,235 - That wasn't candy. 311 00:13:39,236 --> 00:13:41,238 - I didn't realize you were still alive. 312 00:13:42,114 --> 00:13:43,114 [twang] 313 00:13:43,115 --> 00:13:44,866 - Less yakking, more whacking! 314 00:13:44,867 --> 00:13:47,870 [sticks clacking] [all grunting] 315 00:13:48,453 --> 00:13:50,162 PROFESSOR: Oh! Ow... [thuds] 316 00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:52,081 - Guys, I'm good at this. 317 00:13:52,082 --> 00:13:54,584 The secret is backswing... - Ouch! 318 00:13:54,585 --> 00:13:56,169 - and follow-through. 319 00:13:56,170 --> 00:13:58,630 [squishing] 320 00:13:59,423 --> 00:14:00,591 Whoop. Sorry. 321 00:14:01,466 --> 00:14:02,967 ? Triumphant music playing ? 322 00:14:02,968 --> 00:14:05,553 - I'm rich! Finally, I can give up limbo 323 00:14:05,554 --> 00:14:08,055 and start a professional sex league. 324 00:14:08,056 --> 00:14:09,765 [thud] [elephant trumpets] 325 00:14:09,766 --> 00:14:11,768 [grunts] Ah, hey, mon! 326 00:14:12,644 --> 00:14:15,188 - Oh no! My side piece! 327 00:14:15,189 --> 00:14:16,397 [elephant trumpets] 328 00:14:16,398 --> 00:14:17,398 ? 329 00:14:17,399 --> 00:14:20,526 - And now for the penultimate game! 330 00:14:20,527 --> 00:14:23,571 - And then it will be over? Th-This is the last game? 331 00:14:23,572 --> 00:14:26,574 - Penultimate means next to last. 332 00:14:26,575 --> 00:14:28,868 You lose the vocabulary game! [beep] 333 00:14:28,869 --> 00:14:30,703 ? 334 00:14:30,704 --> 00:14:31,746 [Kif grunts] 335 00:14:31,747 --> 00:14:34,248 - Kiffy! No! 336 00:14:34,249 --> 00:14:35,751 [sobbing] 337 00:14:37,252 --> 00:14:40,796 - This fiendish game will be a treasure hunt 338 00:14:40,797 --> 00:14:43,799 for these orbs of horsehide! 339 00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:46,385 - Blernsballs? - No, baseballs. 340 00:14:46,386 --> 00:14:47,762 My mom had balls signed 341 00:14:47,763 --> 00:14:50,848 by her favorite members of the 1962 Mets. 342 00:14:50,849 --> 00:14:53,392 She hid them all over the house, and we had to find them. 343 00:14:53,393 --> 00:14:54,977 - There are seven of you, 344 00:14:54,978 --> 00:14:58,564 but only four hidden baseballs! 345 00:14:58,565 --> 00:15:02,193 That's all we had. And the machine can't make baseballs. 346 00:15:02,194 --> 00:15:04,237 It's not magic, for God's sake. 347 00:15:04,238 --> 00:15:07,031 - Let the hunt begin! 348 00:15:07,032 --> 00:15:09,868 ? Mystical music playing ? 349 00:15:11,537 --> 00:15:14,705 - [gasps] I found a baseball in the moldy tangerines! 350 00:15:14,706 --> 00:15:16,541 Ah-choo! Ah-choo! 351 00:15:16,542 --> 00:15:18,376 - One ball left, kids! 352 00:15:18,377 --> 00:15:19,961 And it's the grand prize, 353 00:15:19,962 --> 00:15:22,463 signed by Choo-Choo Coleman himself. 354 00:15:22,464 --> 00:15:25,466 - It's as good as Gedgie's. 355 00:15:25,467 --> 00:15:28,470 ? Mysterious music playing ? 356 00:15:33,225 --> 00:15:34,851 [cabinet creaks] 357 00:15:34,852 --> 00:15:37,353 Don't bother. I already checked the fridge. 358 00:15:37,354 --> 00:15:39,063 - Yeah, but things get lost in there. 359 00:15:39,064 --> 00:15:41,858 Just last night, we had bicentennial meatloaf. 360 00:15:41,859 --> 00:15:44,735 Red, white, and green. [jars rattle] 361 00:15:44,736 --> 00:15:47,405 ? 362 00:15:47,406 --> 00:15:48,615 A-ha! 363 00:15:49,324 --> 00:15:51,450 - Way to go, Phil! - That's my boy! 364 00:15:51,451 --> 00:15:54,745 - B-B-But, I searched every inch of that fridge. 365 00:15:54,746 --> 00:15:56,163 Fry must be cheating! 366 00:15:56,164 --> 00:15:59,167 - That would explain why he's winning everything. 367 00:15:59,168 --> 00:16:01,836 - I am not a cheater! I'm not! 368 00:16:01,837 --> 00:16:04,922 ? Melancholy music playing ? 369 00:16:04,923 --> 00:16:07,425 [cabinets creak] [Bender whirring] 370 00:16:07,426 --> 00:16:09,177 ? tense music playing ? 371 00:16:09,178 --> 00:16:12,138 - Come on, Fry. This was your house. 372 00:16:12,139 --> 00:16:15,391 Please tell me where the baseballs are. 373 00:16:15,392 --> 00:16:17,476 - You want me to cheat? 374 00:16:17,477 --> 00:16:18,936 I can't do that, Leela. 375 00:16:18,937 --> 00:16:22,231 I am not a cheater. I'm not. 376 00:16:22,232 --> 00:16:25,151 - Ooh, lookie-see what I found in the crawlspace! 377 00:16:25,152 --> 00:16:27,862 Signed by both Bob Millers. 378 00:16:27,863 --> 00:16:29,823 - [gasps] There's only one left! 379 00:16:32,367 --> 00:16:33,993 Please, Fry! 380 00:16:33,994 --> 00:16:37,663 I know you don't wanna cheat, but it's me. Leela! 381 00:16:37,664 --> 00:16:40,583 The woman you occasionally say you love. 382 00:16:40,584 --> 00:16:42,210 - I always love you, Leela, 383 00:16:42,211 --> 00:16:44,670 but there are two things I just can't do. 384 00:16:44,671 --> 00:16:47,256 Almost anything, and cheat. 385 00:16:47,257 --> 00:16:49,509 ? Melancholy music playing ? 386 00:16:49,510 --> 00:16:50,760 - You're right. 387 00:16:50,761 --> 00:16:53,679 You're sticking to your principles. [sniffles] 388 00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:56,224 I'm proud of you. 389 00:16:56,225 --> 00:16:59,228 [wailing, sobbing] 390 00:17:00,896 --> 00:17:03,981 - I've never cheated in my life. Never. 391 00:17:03,982 --> 00:17:06,151 But I'll do it. This once. 392 00:17:08,403 --> 00:17:10,613 - Well, he cheated. You win that bet. 393 00:17:10,614 --> 00:17:12,533 - Time to celebrate with a new mask! 394 00:17:14,368 --> 00:17:15,743 [Fry sniffles] 395 00:17:15,744 --> 00:17:18,287 - Please remember me as a guy who never, 396 00:17:18,288 --> 00:17:21,291 ever cheated. Until now. 397 00:17:23,335 --> 00:17:26,963 - As the last orb has been found, the hunt is over. 398 00:17:26,964 --> 00:17:28,632 Winners, step forward. 399 00:17:30,551 --> 00:17:32,969 You're not the winners. Who said you were the winners? 400 00:17:32,970 --> 00:17:35,263 - I forgot to mention the winners are the ones 401 00:17:35,264 --> 00:17:37,849 who don't find the baseballs! 402 00:17:37,850 --> 00:17:39,393 That's on me, guys. [beep] 403 00:17:40,894 --> 00:17:44,856 [fizzling] [wailing, sobbing] 404 00:17:44,857 --> 00:17:48,401 - Ooh. That was some impressive reverse cheating, Fry. 405 00:17:48,402 --> 00:17:51,279 - For the last time, I'm not a cheater. 406 00:17:51,280 --> 00:17:54,365 Just shut up, Gedgie. I-I mean, Bendy. 407 00:17:54,366 --> 00:17:58,327 - [gasps] How dare you mangle my blessed name! 408 00:17:58,328 --> 00:18:00,913 - Whoa, whoa! Save it for the finale. 409 00:18:00,914 --> 00:18:04,333 A game which will be played... to the death! 410 00:18:04,334 --> 00:18:05,668 ? Dramatic sting ? 411 00:18:05,669 --> 00:18:07,671 - They were all to the death! 412 00:18:08,672 --> 00:18:10,506 ? Dramatic music playing ? 413 00:18:10,507 --> 00:18:12,633 - The final game shall be a test 414 00:18:12,634 --> 00:18:14,719 of raw physical prowess! 415 00:18:14,720 --> 00:18:16,554 Prepare yourselves 416 00:18:16,555 --> 00:18:20,392 for a brutal, no-holds-barred match of... [beep] 417 00:18:21,518 --> 00:18:24,478 Pin the Tail on the Donkey! 418 00:18:24,479 --> 00:18:27,357 - Aw, he's a cute little whatchacallit. 419 00:18:27,941 --> 00:18:30,276 [roaring, snarling] 420 00:18:30,277 --> 00:18:31,986 Donkey. [growls] 421 00:18:31,987 --> 00:18:34,655 - The beast is clad in armor, 422 00:18:34,656 --> 00:18:38,492 save for this tiny area on its rear. 423 00:18:38,493 --> 00:18:40,703 - It is the donkey's Achilles butt. 424 00:18:40,704 --> 00:18:43,581 All its vital organs are clustered there. 425 00:18:43,582 --> 00:18:45,208 - Just like me! [clanging] 426 00:18:45,209 --> 00:18:47,877 GAMESTER 1: Simply pin the tail on the butt 427 00:18:47,878 --> 00:18:51,255 to slay the donkey and claim victory. 428 00:18:51,256 --> 00:18:52,965 - I'm shivering with excitement 429 00:18:52,966 --> 00:18:54,884 because this game involves... 430 00:18:54,885 --> 00:18:56,887 masks! [beep] 431 00:19:00,224 --> 00:19:03,184 ? mystical music playing ? 432 00:19:03,185 --> 00:19:06,229 - Phil, Semitic kid, it's down to you two. 433 00:19:06,230 --> 00:19:07,980 - Yes! - Go, Gedgie! 434 00:19:07,981 --> 00:19:09,440 - Woo-hoo! 435 00:19:09,441 --> 00:19:12,360 - Yes! Everything's coming up Gedgie. 436 00:19:12,361 --> 00:19:14,612 Beat that, REO Cheatwagon. 437 00:19:14,613 --> 00:19:16,781 ? Mysterious music playing ? 438 00:19:16,782 --> 00:19:19,283 - [whispers] How's this for cheating? 439 00:19:19,284 --> 00:19:21,577 ? Dramatic music playing ? 440 00:19:21,578 --> 00:19:24,039 [kids yelling] 441 00:19:24,748 --> 00:19:27,124 [stab] - Oh, well. I guess you can't win 'em... 442 00:19:27,125 --> 00:19:28,668 ? dramatic sting ? 443 00:19:28,669 --> 00:19:31,212 all? - Look at my boy! 444 00:19:31,213 --> 00:19:34,341 You stabbed that donkey like a professional donkey stabber! 445 00:19:35,384 --> 00:19:37,468 - I'm so proud of you. 446 00:19:37,469 --> 00:19:40,388 We'll go get your presents, so you can open them. 447 00:19:40,389 --> 00:19:42,807 - Aw! - This party sucks! 448 00:19:42,808 --> 00:19:44,934 - Told you Fry was a cheater. 449 00:19:44,935 --> 00:19:46,561 - Happy birthday, Fry. 450 00:19:46,562 --> 00:19:49,272 I hope you had fun cheating 'cause nobody else did! 451 00:19:49,273 --> 00:19:51,691 ? Melancholy music playing ? 452 00:19:51,692 --> 00:19:53,192 [door creaks, slams] 453 00:19:53,193 --> 00:19:55,027 [crying] 454 00:19:55,028 --> 00:19:57,030 - But I didn't cheat! 455 00:19:59,908 --> 00:20:03,661 - I lost a best friend a long time ago 'cause he thought I was cheating, 456 00:20:03,662 --> 00:20:05,955 and I'm not gonna let it happen again. 457 00:20:05,956 --> 00:20:08,249 - I don't wanna lose you either, Fry. 458 00:20:08,250 --> 00:20:11,252 - So I'm gonna prove I'm not cheating. 459 00:20:11,253 --> 00:20:13,671 Gouge out my eyes! - Good idea! 460 00:20:13,672 --> 00:20:16,883 - Fry's suggestion is beyond horrific. 461 00:20:16,884 --> 00:20:20,511 Therefore, we shall do it! - But, to make the game fair, 462 00:20:20,512 --> 00:20:23,264 we shall remove the eyes of all the players! 463 00:20:23,265 --> 00:20:25,641 - Wait, hold on. What, what? - Fear not. 464 00:20:25,642 --> 00:20:29,228 Our machine can remove eyes painlessly. 465 00:20:29,229 --> 00:20:30,730 [click, squishing] 466 00:20:30,731 --> 00:20:32,064 [Fry screaming] 467 00:20:32,065 --> 00:20:34,192 Oops! Sorry. I stepped on your foot. 468 00:20:34,193 --> 00:20:36,570 - It's okay. I'm fine. [click, whirring] 469 00:20:37,237 --> 00:20:39,739 - Let the animal abuse begin! 470 00:20:39,740 --> 00:20:42,575 [roaring, snarling] 471 00:20:42,576 --> 00:20:45,161 - Alright, you monster whosit. 472 00:20:45,162 --> 00:20:48,998 I'm gonna stick this doohickey where the dealy don't whatsit. 473 00:20:48,999 --> 00:20:51,292 [snarls, gulps] 474 00:20:51,293 --> 00:20:53,211 [roaring] 475 00:20:53,212 --> 00:20:55,880 - I'm sorry I called you a cheater, buddy. 476 00:20:55,881 --> 00:20:57,882 - [sniffles] Thanks, Bender. 477 00:20:57,883 --> 00:21:00,259 What do you say we team up and go out fighting? 478 00:21:00,260 --> 00:21:02,929 - I say, aw yeah, baby! 479 00:21:02,930 --> 00:21:04,430 Friends to the end! 480 00:21:04,431 --> 00:21:08,017 [both yelling] 481 00:21:08,018 --> 00:21:09,060 [Bender yelps] 482 00:21:09,061 --> 00:21:11,229 My vital ass organs! 483 00:21:11,230 --> 00:21:13,856 You are a cheater! 484 00:21:13,857 --> 00:21:15,942 [grunting, gagging] 485 00:21:15,943 --> 00:21:16,943 ? 486 00:21:16,944 --> 00:21:18,779 - Bender? Bender?! 487 00:21:19,905 --> 00:21:23,199 - Congratulations, Philip J. Fry. 488 00:21:23,200 --> 00:21:24,951 You are the winner! 489 00:21:24,952 --> 00:21:28,204 - Return his eyes that he might gaze upon 490 00:21:28,205 --> 00:21:30,039 the horror he has wrought! 491 00:21:30,040 --> 00:21:31,666 And the confetti. [beep] 492 00:21:31,667 --> 00:21:33,460 [party horns blowing] 493 00:21:34,795 --> 00:21:36,587 ? melancholy music playing ? 494 00:21:36,588 --> 00:21:40,299 [crying] 495 00:21:40,300 --> 00:21:44,304 [Donkey gagging] 496 00:21:44,805 --> 00:21:46,472 [Fry grunting] 497 00:21:46,473 --> 00:21:47,807 [roars] 498 00:21:47,808 --> 00:21:50,685 - Well, that's that. I gotta get to church. 499 00:21:50,686 --> 00:21:53,563 - The games are now complete. 500 00:21:53,564 --> 00:21:56,774 The winner is... her. Whoever she is. 501 00:21:56,775 --> 00:22:00,028 We thank the players for their efforts. [beep] 502 00:22:01,029 --> 00:22:04,533 [all gasping, murmuring] 503 00:22:05,909 --> 00:22:07,910 - How the shmeck are we alive? 504 00:22:07,911 --> 00:22:11,873 - The machine can easily bring people back to life. 505 00:22:11,874 --> 00:22:13,749 Did I not mention that either? 506 00:22:13,750 --> 00:22:15,334 - Farewell! 507 00:22:15,335 --> 00:22:17,963 ? 508 00:22:20,465 --> 00:22:24,427 - Well, that was the second worst birthday party I ever had. 509 00:22:24,428 --> 00:22:28,055 All I ever wanted was for people to believe I'm not a cheater. 510 00:22:28,056 --> 00:22:29,682 - We believe you, Fry. 511 00:22:29,683 --> 00:22:32,894 - Yeah, seeing as how that old lady killed you so easy. 512 00:22:32,895 --> 00:22:35,438 - He went down like a sack of shoes. 513 00:22:35,439 --> 00:22:38,357 - I sure did. Thank you, everybody. 514 00:22:38,358 --> 00:22:40,861 - Group hug. Come on! Group hug! 515 00:22:42,696 --> 00:22:45,199 ? Mystical music playing ? 516 00:22:46,158 --> 00:22:49,076 ? melancholy music playing ? 517 00:22:49,077 --> 00:22:50,078 [cabinet creaks] 518 00:22:50,954 --> 00:22:54,624 - Eh, you really think a games party is a good idea? 519 00:22:54,625 --> 00:22:57,376 I mean, Phil's not much of a competitor. 520 00:22:57,377 --> 00:23:00,546 - Yeah, I know. He still can't work a zipper. 521 00:23:00,547 --> 00:23:03,841 But, he's my son, and I love him, 522 00:23:03,842 --> 00:23:05,635 and I wanna give him a birthday 523 00:23:05,636 --> 00:23:09,138 that'll leave him feeling like a winner for once. 524 00:23:09,139 --> 00:23:12,643 ? Ur Mum by Wet Leg playing ? 525 00:23:14,686 --> 00:23:17,188 [blowing] 526 00:23:17,189 --> 00:23:20,192 ? 527 00:23:20,859 --> 00:23:21,859 [record scratch] 528 00:23:21,860 --> 00:23:23,529 ? 529 00:23:28,242 --> 00:23:31,453 ? 530 00:23:34,915 --> 00:23:38,252 ? 531 00:23:38,877 --> 00:23:41,171 ? Mm, mm, mm ? 532 00:23:50,055 --> 00:23:53,140 - ? I feel so dumb, dumb, dumb ? 533 00:23:53,141 --> 00:23:55,059 ? Mm, mm ? 534 00:23:55,060 --> 00:23:56,519 ? music fades ? 535 00:23:56,520 --> 00:24:00,356 ? When I think about what you've become ? 536 00:24:00,357 --> 00:24:04,110 ? I feel sorry for your mum ? 537 00:24:04,111 --> 00:24:07,697 ? You say we're all having fun ? 538 00:24:07,698 --> 00:24:11,492 ? Do you know you're the only one? ? 539 00:24:11,493 --> 00:24:14,496 ? Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb ? 540 00:24:14,913 --> 00:24:17,916 ? Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb ? 541 00:24:18,458 --> 00:24:21,378 ? Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb ? 542 00:24:22,254 --> 00:24:24,672 ? Mm, mm, mm ? 543 00:24:24,673 --> 00:24:25,882 ? song fades ? 544 00:24:25,883 --> 00:24:28,886 >>>>oakislandtk<<<<< www.opensubtitles.org 545 00:24:28,936 --> 00:24:33,486 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 37447

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