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-I called this broadcast
today to announce

that for the time being, the
government of the United States

still stands and will continue
to do so until the very end.

The attacks on our nation's
soil over the last 30 hours

have been brutal, efficient,
and devastatingly thorough.

Over 300 million American
lives have been lost,

and 17 of our largest
and proudest cities

have fallen forever.

Without question, we are
all unwilling participants

in the most terrible tragedy
in the entire harrowing history

of mankind.

I feel that if there were ever
a time to be fully honest,

that time is now.

My fellow Americans, for
the first time in my life,

I confess that I
have lost all hope.

And as we near the end,
I-- I pray for our nation.

May God protect you all and
forgive us for the world

that we have left our children.

[ELEVATOR MUSIC]

NARRATOR: Of course,
as far as we know,

the worst event ever to befall
mankind was the sunstroke days.

The days between May 17
and May 19 of the year

of our lord 2075 AD, when the
systematic liquidation of Old

America was
successfully initiated.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

There were survivors,
just over a million,

who shut themselves
underground for over 20

dark and cold years.

And then one day,
the poison passed.

With no law and no
unified moral order,

America was once again
a savage frontier.

In 2097, the race for
sociological power began.

And what erupted is
political turmoil,

Shakespearean in its scope.

This was the time when
our nation's legends were

born into the national
consciousness, the men

and women you learned about
in school time and time

again, our nation's forefathers.

This is the time when our
nation's story begins,

the epic, fantastical
story of New America.

This is Tex Kennedy.

The belief is not
uncommon that Tex Kennedy

is, in fact, the
father of our nation.

And the two in back
are Yul and Quincy.

Yul and Quincy are both
robots and programmed

to stand by Tex Kennedy
throughout his life.

However, they were
built in the year 2042,

decades before Tex
Kennedy was born.

Yul was given an
actual human heart.

This makes it impossible to
reprogram Yul against his will.

Quincy was gifted
with the convenience

of being able to generate any
wounds inflicted upon him.

Yul and Quincy's
original mission

was to stand by and guard US
President Randal Carter when

humans could no
longer be trusted.

However, they failed in
their prime objective.

[GUNSHOT]

[SCREAMING]

Yul and Quincy were
deemed a national failure.

Their synthetic self esteem
and sense of self worth

were dangerously low.

So they did with many men
would do in their situation.

They drank and drank for 19
straight years, until finally,

a new mission arrived-- to
protect the young, orphaned Tex

Kennedy, son of the late heroes
Scott and Eloise Kennedy.

When the end of Old
America arrived,

Yul and Quincy secured the
seven-year-old Tex Kennedy

underground and then fought off
attackers for several hours,

until the first bomb went off.

It was too late to join
young Tex underground.

Opening the hatch
would have killed him.

For over 20 years,
Yul and Quincy

waited outside the bunker.

And for over 20
years, Tex Kennedy

grew up alone underground.

Tex survived.

Time passed.

And Tex emerged into
the world a grown man.

But the year was now 2097,
and Tex Kennedy's troubles

were only beginning.

-Here we are, boys.

The edge of the world.

The goddamn threshold of hell.

Look boys, it's our
old friend Richie.

-Welcome [INAUDIBLE] Jesus.

-Where you coming from, Richie?

-Yeah, Richie.

-Richie, you look like shit.

-You really do.

You look like shit, I noticed.

You thought you could
phone Benny first?

-We were outside the bunker.

We were about to get Benny when
suddenly, like out of nowhere,

this guy dropped out of the
sky like he was waiting for us.

[SCREAM]

-So I blacked out, and
I woke up just in time

to see the bastard rip
Sally's spine out of her back.

And then this guy, who
had to be the Antichrist,

came up to me and he said--

-You go out, and you
tell all the outsiders

what happens here.

-Well, Richie, I can't
leave you like this.

-Hey guys, look at me.

Look at me.

We're going to be fine, OK?

We have a duty to this nation.

And the world's not going
to change itself, is it?

Is it?

-No.

-No.

It's not going to change itself.

-OK.

Let's do this.

NARRATOR: Tex and
the robots were now

completing the final steps of
a 3,000 mile campaign trail

across the unforgiving
wasteland of New America.

All the while, they had
preached a new gospel of hope

to every godforsaken
pocket of civilization

they happened across.

-Hey today, sir.

My name's Tex Kennedy.

These are my-- how are you?

Good to see you.

-Yeah, hey.

These are my colleagues,
Yul and Quincy Mozart.

-How's it going?

-We don't want to take
up too much of your time.

Just wanted to let you know that
the new tomorrow is dawning.

-My guts are dry.

-Well, uh, we can do
something about that

if we can count on
your support for when

the new tomorrow comes.

[MAKING BIRD SOUNDS]

-Why, if that's a problem,
we've got an answer for him.

Things are about to get a whole
lot brighter for you sad sacks.

NARRATOR: However, it was here,
at the end of their journey,

where the true
nightmares would begin.

MAN (OFFSCREEN): Zachary,
why are you here?

Why aren't you doing your job?

-I did.

-Didn't I ask you nicely?

Make sure nobody gets to him.

-Ow!

Jesus!

-Yeah, right.

-Quincy.

Quincy.

Quincy.

Please do not
touch anything, OK?

-I'm sorry.

-Do not touch anything.

-Gosh, that's just amazing.

-No, thank you.

This is it, boys.

Everything's just
like Remington said.

-All hail Remington.

-Any sign of the Antichrist?

-Nope.

Richie was just
trying to scare us.

-A pretty elaborate
way to do it.

-Yeah.

-Ain't one of his arms cut off?

-Yeah.

-All that to scare us, man?

-Yul, there's no Antichrist, OK?

-Are we going to do this?

-Yeah, we're going
to-- [SIGH] Yeah.

-I can never get
this top button.

-Here.

-Oh, it's fine, man.

You look great.

-It's like my neck got
bigger or something.

-Nah, I don't think so.

-Is that possible?

-No, no.

-Can your neck get bigger?

-No, the model before that--

-Shh.
-You could--

-Shh.
Shh.

-That would--

-What?
-Shh.

-What?
-Shh.
-Shh.
Shh.

-Shh.
Shh.

Shh.
-What?

-Thank you.
Thank you.

-We're going to help you, man.

-Yo, Benny, you in there?

-[INAUDIBLE]

-Shh.

-Benny!

We're going to come in.

-I got it.

-OK.
I'm going to open it.

All right.
Back up from the door.

-I'm going to open the door.
-You're going to do it?

-Just step aside.

Get out of the way.

[INTERPOSING VOICES]

-I really don't think
you should do it.

-Thank you.
Thank you.

Get out of the way please.

Thank you.

-Let him open the door.

-[INAUDIBLE] go ahead.

-Benny, step away
from the door, please.

Why'd you let me do that?

-What?

-Why'd you let me do that?

-What do you mean

-Quincy, please, will
you do it, please?

-OK.

-Thank you.

-That's what I was saying
in the first place.

[DOOR CREAKING]

The door opens outwards.

-I know.

Woo.

Whoa.

You guys should-- it smells like
Satan's sweaty crotch in here.

Hello!

Hello!

Anybody in here?

Any Americans?

Whoa.

Hey, Benny.

Hey.

[SOBBING]

-You're sitting in the
goddamn dark, friend.

You look like life tugged
your sack a little.

We came a long ways to find you.

You got a lot of
people looking for you.

But we got here
first, didn't we?

Let me get you out
there in the sun.

Whoa, Benny.

NARRATOR: Benjamin Remington.

You wouldn't know
it to see him here,

but he was destined
to save us all.

TEX (OFFSCREEN): How long
ago did your power burn out?

You're like a god
damned night bat.

You've been in here
23 years, Benny.

It's time for you
to come on out.

We have a lot of work to
do, and you're in charge.

I'm just gonna-- I'm just
gonna help you out here.

[SCREAMS]

QUINCY (OFFSCREEN): Oh, shit.

YUL (OFFSCREEN): Tex, that's
what I was talking about.

You can't just throw
him out like that.

TEX (OFFSCREEN): You
know, I told you.

This kind of thing, you gotta
hold your breath and jump in.

YUL (OFFSCREEN): Well, you
could show some respect.

-[SCREAMS]

-Benny, it's for your
own good, partner.

-[SCREAMS]

-You gotta soak it up, OK?

You gotta soak up that sun.

You were, what, three
the last time you saw it?

-Hey, you're in
the clear now, man.

Half life's expired
two years ago.

You've been, um, sitting up
in there, wasting your time.

TEX (OFFSCREEN):
Benny, man, you should

have splurged for the XL 20s.

These bunker L9s
are pieces of shit.

You got your XL
20s, the electricity

guaranteed not to go out.

Still have your eyes at least.

I bet you got 20/20
hindsight now though, huh?

Here, Benny.

Benny, buddy, this
is the problem here

with the-- with the smell.

You should've-- you should've
ate this meat in here as soon

as the power went out, then
stuck with the non-perishables,

OK?

-Oh, yeah.

-Let's air this out a bit.

Oh.

-Oh.

-I couldn't be more
embarrassed right now.

Oh, it's his parents.

I'm sorry as all hell.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

-Benny, I just
want to say, first

of all, what a humongous honor
it is to finally meet you

after all these years.

YUL (OFFSCREEN): We came
a long way to find you.

TEX (OFFSCREEN): We started
out in Los Angeles, California.

-Well, what used
to be Los Angeles.

TEX (OFFSCREEN): They got
15 people living there now.

YUL (OFFSCREEN): I
can't believe that shit.

-We would have liked to
have stayed there a while,

but we gotta get
going, keep moving.

-We're on the campaign trail.

-Quincy, can I see
you for a minute?

-What?

-Would you just-- would you
just do me a favor and just

shut your mouth and
let me handle this?

Just let me do it.

You don't need to do anything.

Just shut your mouth, OK?

OK?
-OK.

-OK?

-OK.

-We're on the campaign trail.

-Well, we're running for office.

We're hoping to get--

-I'm running for the office
of the Vice King of the New

America, if you'll have me.

YUL (OFFSCREEN): I'm
going to be general.

-Yeah, Yul is general.

-I'll be treasurer.

Treasurer and Senator of the
New Republic of Louisiana.

-Quincy's a robot.

-No, I'm not.

-Yeah, he is.

-There's no reason to upset him.

-Yul's mostly a robot.

He's got a human heart, so he's
not like a full-fledged robot.

-Now you're starting with this.

-Quincy's the real deal though.

He's a robot.

-No, no, no, no.

No, I'm not.

I'm not.

-Anyways, the important
thing is that we found you.

-You're the key, what we
all have been looking for.

-You're what King Clark
Remington had in mind.

-He was your uncle, man.

That's fucking rowdy.

-You have no idea the kind
of influence your uncle

had to all of us in the
underground communities.

I can only say that Jesus Christ
himself would have had less.

-Who's Jesus Christ?

Who's Jesus Christ?

-Shut up.

Shut up, Quincy.

Just shut up.

Just shut up!

You've been pulling
this shit all day.

-OK.

-Would you please
just shut your mouth?

Just shut your mouth.

Look at me.

Look at me.

Shut up.

OK?

Just shut your mouth.

-Yeah.

-OK?

-OK.

I'm not saying anything else.

-Shh.

OK.

I'm sorry.

-What?

-I'm sorry.

-That's cool.

-I'm sorry.

-Yeah.

-I'm sorry.

Um-- [MAKES SOUNDS]

I'm sorry.

Um, your uncle gave us
comfort and guidance

through gamma radio
broadcasts for the duration

of our underground lives.

-Yeah, there was, um, Clark
Remington and his nightly radio

show, "The Remington Hour."

Um, very few people deny
that Remington's influence

over the early years of New
America was immeasurable.

But the thing is-- and a lot
of people forget this-- is, um,

he was-- yes, he
was King of America.

But he was the self
proclaimed King of America.

And I think he sold cars
before the sunstroke days.

-No money down and
nothing up my sleeve.

It's true at
Remington Automotive,

or I ain't [CLICKS]
quick deal Clark.

-But after the sunstroke
days when he was underground,

and he could communicate
with his radio,

he convinced the
underground communities

that he was King
basically because he

had this-- he had this certain
kind of charisma-- charisma

about him that-- that, you
know, in the other-- the other

American underground
people, they--

they had no other option.

-Ladies and gentlemen
of the New America,

this is Clark Remington,
speaking to you now

for the last time.

I have held your hand
through the darkest span

in our human timeline.

But there is a light ahead.

We all can see it.

And now is the era of a
new time and a new people.

I am at the twilight of my days
here on this cursed planet.

I ask that no tears
be shed in my passing,

but rather that my memory be
preserved through perseverance

and through a commitment to the
plans I have laid before you.

One year and seven months
into our future, the citizens

of this nation will emerge
onto the soil once again.

And you will need a
new king to guide you.

I call out today, May
27, 2094, to announce

that the new king shall be
Benjamin Remington, my nephew.

I call all of you who believe
in the promises of tomorrow

to journey to the dark
corner of the world,

exalt this young man,
and bring him to power.

He has the answers
to the future.

And he will bring you home.

This is Clark Remington,
saying be strong.

Do not compromise.

And God bless you all.

-Uh, yeah.

People wonder why Tex Kennedy
was so obsessed with, um,

following out
Remington's orders.

But, you know, people
have to understand

that, uh, Tex was an orphan.

And when he was-- when
he was underground,

Remington's radio show
was the only parent

that-- that Tex had.

And, you know, the fact
that Benjamin Remington

had to become his
successor was-- oh, my god.

That was the gospel to Tex.

That was simply mandatory.

Does that make sense?

-Benny Remington.

That's you.

-Quincy, he knows who he is.

-Well, the problem was that your
uncle had the broadcast from

a gamma radio 2,800X

-So in order for the
nation to stand again,

it had had to be unified.

Well, unfortunately,
though, by the time

the information got to the East
Coast, it was misunderstood,

and it was distorted.

And I'd say, [CLICKS] less
than 25% of the population

actually received
a usable signal.

It's pretty sad.

-Out there in the
threshold of hell

is the answer to
all our problems.

They have a gamma radio
12,000X, the most powerful radio

transmitter in the
history of the world,

capable of reaching all the
borders of New America at once.

-If we take control
of the radio,

we have control of
the communication.

-If we control
the communication,

we can unify the people.

-The world's about to
get a shitload brighter.

YUL (OFFSCREEN): A
fresh new one coming

around the corner, a new nation.

-We heard rumors that there
are over 100,000 Americans

surviving somewhere over those
purple mountain majesties.

We gotta find them all.

We've got to reorganize
and we need this rock

if we are going to
stay a united nation.

-And an army.

-An army.

-That's right, friend, an army.

We've got to raise if
we're going to find off

the foreign oppressors that
want to section us out and claim

the land that belongs to us.

I'm talking about Canada.

I'm talking about Mexico.

I'm talking about Arizona.

I'm talking about
England, goddamn it.

NARRATOR: What Tex and
the robots didn't know

was that Benny was much
clearer on the situation

than they could
ever have imagined.

MAN (OFFSCREEN):
Do you want to keep

thinking at this scale, huh?

NARRATOR: Benjamin had begun
to see the visions when

his eyes had failed completely.

And when he was ready, Benjamin
would know just what to do.

TEX (OFFSCREEN): Yes, sir.

Yes, sir.

Yes, sir.

Us native Americans
have to stick together.

You're the chief, kid.

You get a full itinerary.

-Tex, we gotta get Sue.

-What?

-Well, we gotta get Sue.

-Yul, I'm the one who decides
what we do with Sue, OK?

-She's gonna be mad, you leave
her in that cage like that.

-Quincy.

-I'm right.

-OK, OK.

QUINCY (OFFSCREEN): Yeah,
I mean, Yul said it.

What?

-Can I just borrow
that real quick?

[SCREAMS]

QUINCY (OFFSCREEN): Who are you?

-Oh, I don't know
why I did that.

Quincy, I apologize.

-The glory is
bleeding from my knee!

-Hold on.

I don't see what the drama is.

Just run the regeneration
program real quick.

OK?

I'm sorry.

OK?

I apologize.

-Regeneration initiated.

-Tyrannical, man.

-Yul, I just said I was sorry.

MAN (OFFSCREEN):
Just because he's

a robot with
regenerative properties.

-Why does everyone
keep saying that?

-He's a robot with
regenerative properties

and a counterproductive,
smart ass mouth.

ELECTRONIC VOICE: Please wait.

-Where are you going?

-Yul, I'm going to
explain something to you,

and I hope you can understand.

ELECTRONIC VOICE: Please wait.

-I don't answer to anybody.

What's my last name, Yul?

Kennedy.

Kennedy.

I am a Kennedy.

I don't answer to you two.

-Well, I don't know what
that has to do with anything.

-Well, because you're retarded.

ELECTRONIC VOICE:
Regeneration complete.

-Well, where are you going?

-I'm going to go get Sue.

I'm going to go bring her here.

Relax for a second in your--

-If there were one
historical figure that's

more responsible for capturing
the imaginations of New

Americans, it would
have to be Cannibal Sue.

Her Christian name,
Cannibal Susan.

[GROWLING]

-Here, guys.

You happy now?

You gonna stop crying?

-She's pissed off.

-Yul, what the-- what the
hell are you doing, man?

-All right.

Relax.

-Keep away from the cage.

She Is not a toy.

-I know that.

-Sue is not a toy.

-I know that OK?

-She will eat your face.

-OK.

QUINCY (OFFSCREEN): She
will suck out your cock.

-All right.

OK.

[GROWLING]

-Hey, Sue.

-Yes?

-Sue, I'm going to let you
out of the box now, OK?

-OK.

-OK?

-OK.

-If you hurt anyone, I'm
bringing out the lightning rod,

OK?

-I won't.

-You bite anybody, I'm going
to cut your kneecaps off.

-I won't.

-You won't what?

-Bite anyone.

-I know you won't.

-Oh.

Thank you guys for
putting me in that box.

I appreciate it.

-OK.

That's far enough.

We don't want you
coming any closer, OK?

-Hey, hey.

-Or I'm going to shock
the shit out of you.

SUE (OFFSCREEN): Do
you have any food?

-We might, OK?

We might.

But it's not going
to be human flesh.

You gotta learn to eat
something different.

-Just anything.

I'm starving.

-Here.

It's Sue, an honest
to god cannibal.

Nobody knows where she came
from, but a battalion of scouts

found her in the
middle of the desert.

-Hello.

-Hey, boys.

I think I have to go pop one.

[GROWLING]

-Goddamn it.

-She was gnawing on
their skulls, had guts

coming out of her teeth.

It was the most terrible thing
I'd ever seen in my life.

-Tex, it wasn't.

You're embellishing.

-Hey, you ate every one of them.

SUE (OFFSCREEN): OK.

-End of story.

ROBERT (OFFSCREEN): And
historically, Cannibal Sue

became a national hero.

Cannibal Sue is of
course the reason

why we celebrate Cannibal
Day every November 9,

when all good Americans
sit down to enjoy

a three ounce cut
of human flesh.

-Happy Cannibal Day, everyone.

-I hate Cannibal Day.

-It's a shame your uncle
Richie couldn't join us.

-Oh, boy.

Here it comes.

-He'd be delicious
with some lemon pepper.

[LAUGHING]

-[INAUDIBLE] talk about it if
you're not going to let me--

-So we found her
days after that.

And luckily, she wasn't
hungry, or else she

would have eaten us too.

-Tex, you're so dramatic.

-We got big plans for her.

-Cannibal Sue.

-When, you know--
when she gets hungry,

she has the strength of 10 men.

She's like a mythical beast.

QUINCY (OFFSCREEN):
Except she's pretty.

-Yeah.

She's a looker beast.

-You guys are pathetic.

-Hey, hey, hey.

I will shock the darkest
reaches of your soul.

SUE (OFFSCREEN): Come on.

[CRACKLE]

NARRATOR: Always a
few steps behind Tex

was Vincent Remington,
Benjamin's first cousin

and the son of the dead
king, Clark Remington.

Vincent became widely known
by his war name, Mr. Jackle.

Marcellus was Jackle's
right hand man

from the mysterious
Republic of Arizona.

-Hi, Vincent.

-I told you not to call me that.
-Right.

Yes.
Sorry.

You're right, sir.

Sorry.

Mr. Jackle, well, I thought you
could use a little cheering up.

So I, uh, threw a little
something together.

We were short on nutmeg, which
is usually my secret recipe.

But I found some cayenne pepper,
and actually that-- All right.

Fine.

-We're close.

I'll bet my father's life on it.

-Your father's life?

-I know, Marcellus.

-Well, that's--

-Ridiculous?

I know.

-Well, I--

-Seeing as how I
killed him, seeing

as how I killed my own father.

NARRATOR: Jackle was intent
on convincing the world

that he'd murdered his father,
which wasn't exactly true.

-Uh, the-- now the relationship
between Vincent Remington

and his father-- oh, that
was a nightmare beyond--

beyond imagination.

It was really, really horrible.

-I call out today, May
27, 2094, to announce

that the new king shall
be Benjamin Remington.

-What are you staring at,
you pathetic little shit?

-I thought I was going
to be the next king.

-Shut up, Vincent.

You open your mouth
again, and I'm

going to knock it
off your skull.

You thought you would be the
next king, did you, Vincent?

My sociopathic son?

What is it now, after, uh,
17 attempts on my life?

God knows how I
made it this long.

But I will tell you one thing.

This country has a shot
at a second chance.

And you are not going
to fuck it up, Vincent.

You are to stay away from
the threshold to hell.

And you stay away
from your cousin.

[CHUCKLES] Look at
you, Vincent, my son.

My son is a little girl.

Hey, buddy, you want to
close the goddamn door

before the whole
fucking room liquifies?

This is it, then.

Give it a good one.

-I'm not going to
kill you, Vincent.

But I am going to take
something from you.

[SCREAMS]

-His ear drum.

The guy took out his ear drum.

[GROANING]

NARRATOR: And so Jackle
resurfaced, assembled

a small band of mercenaries,
and set out on his dark quest

to murder his cousin and take
the throne of new America

for himself.

-It doesn't matter.

They have my cousin.

We track them down.

Our plans stay the same.

-It won't be easy.

It's not a problem.

It's a challenge.

But we're going to have to
face up to Tex and his robots.

-And Cannibal Sue.

-Vincent.

-Whatever.

The point is my cousin
Benny must be eviscerated.

-Now listen, you've
got 50 men out there

eager to hear from you.
-Let me think, Marcellus.

-And if you need--

-Let me think, Marcellus!

-(UNDER BREATH) Any [INAUDIBLE],
and I can punk your dismembered

head across the heavens.

-What?

-Sorry, you still thinking?

-Something about my--

-I'm going to go round
up the troops, OK?

You stay happy.

[YELLING]

-Hey, listen, uh, Marcellus.

Look, there's a couple things
that, uh, me and the fellas

here thought that
maybe we could talk

to you about just real quick.

We think Jackle's lost his shit.

XAVIER (OFFSCREEN):
It's not that.

Well, it's just that we've been
tromping through the desert.

We just want to know,
what's the buzz?

-Yeah, we deserve to
know who we're chasing.

-Exactly.

I mean, that's the least
you could do for us.

-We all think it's the
least you could do.

-All right, guys.

OK.

If you have a
complaint, you're going

to have to elect a
single representative,

and then we'll hear you.

-I elect Xavier.

-Yeah, Xavier, you do it.

-Yeah, OK.

All right.

Yeah, I'll be the
representative for the crew.

-Xavier, you accept
this responsibility?

-Yeah, I-- yes.

[GROANS]

-It's all right.

[GROANING]

That's right.

[GROANING]

All right, guys,
what we need now

is confidence in your leaders.

-Yeah, we know.

I know.

-Uh-huh.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

-We're going to sit at the
throne of the new world.

But you have to trust us.

[UKULELE MUSIC PLAYING]

-(SINGING) With honor,
my love, down by the sea.

Ask myself what else
would an island be.

Down by the sea.

With you and me.

Love so tenderly.

Down by the sea.

Went to the market
down by the sea.

Ask myself what I would
buy in a market by the sea.

Maybe kiwis or orange-ies
or apple-ies or kumquat-ies,

but definitely goat's milk.

Monkey see, monkey do as I
go to the market with you.

Yeah.

Monkey see, monkey do
as I'm lighting my fire

and drinking my goat's milk.

[HUMMING]

[SINGING]

-Benny I-- I-- I know you're
going through some hard times

here.

But you really need to get
your shit together and try

to come up with some
kind of strategy.

[SQUEAL]

-OK, that's not--
that's not helpful.

Um, our goal, Benny,
uh-- and listen hard.

Our goal is this.

Your uncle foretold of
our nation's new capital

residing 10
kilometers from here.

It's Fort Brando.

And before you can
take over as king,

we have to overtake that fort.

And it's not going to be easy.

-Hey, I'm freezing over here.

-Sue, can it.

-Can I just hang out by
the fire with you guys?

YUL (OFFSCREEN): Hell no.

-Tex.

-Tex, tell her hell no.

-You want me to freeze?

You want to lock me in a box
and then let me freeze to death?

-Do you promise
not to eat anybody?

YUL (OFFSCREEN): Tex.

TEX (OFFSCREEN): Let me
at least get the dynamite.

NARRATOR: As Tex and
Benjamin progressed slowly

toward their fate,
Benjamin began to speak up,

spouting the indecipherable
wisdom of the ages.

-I feel it.

It's the power of 3,216
and 42 degrees in, please.

Life is so much more
than just the trillions

of reflections of light.

I smell porpoise.

That's not always a good sign.

NARRATOR: The
solitary tracker named

Thorn was a former resident
of the threshold of hell

and the estranged twin
brother of Zach Jefferson.

-Zach, I didn't know
it was you, man.

-I'm not Zach.

-Oh, you're his twin
brother, aren't you?

Uh, Thorn.

-Back from the dead.

-You can be injured, dickwad.

Wait.

NARRATOR: Thron was
returning to the threshold

for the first time in two years.

However, his objectives
were not political.

His intentions were of a
far more personal nature.

-Gentlemen, when you all
came to me, lost and poisoned

sacks of shit, I offered
you a purpose, a destiny,

an opportunity to
participate in one

of the most important acts
in our new human history.

Most of you won't survive.

-[MUMBLING]

-I'm sorry.

What was that?

-Nothing.

-No, no.

You have something to share.

By all means.

MARCELLUS (OFFSCREEN):
We're all family here.

There's no reason to be shy.

-That's right.

What was your name again?

-Ian.

-Carry on.

-Well, I just had a brainstorm.

I mean, why don't we just
leave your cousin there

in the threshold of
hell, let him die?

And we can continue to take
over the world from here.

-No, no.

It's a good idea.

Your way is so much
easier and simpler.

Just ignore the natural
order of nature.

Just ignore our destiny.

Just put the fate of our
nation and all my dreams

into the hands of a bunch
of goddamn motherfucking

sociopaths while we sit here
like a bunch of goddamn--

fucking goddamn--

-Maybe if you [INAUDIBLE].

[MOTOR REVVING]

[SCREAMS]

-We leave at dawn.

Those of you not with us
will be hunted and gutted

like a lizard.

-Just a little while
longer, Marcellus, and this

will all be in your hands.

VINCENT (OFFSCREEN): What?

-Nothing.

Do your breathing
exercises, Vincent.

Enjoy breathing while it lasts,
Vincent, you gargled puss.

VINCENT (OFFSCREEN): What?

-The legend of Yorick, the
children of the second son,

and the beach party at
the threshold of hell,

from at least
several perspectives,

goes something like this.

It was in March, 2075 when a
man using the completely bogus

appellation Yorick arrived at
an area that later became known

as the threshold of hell
during an annual event known

in Old American as spring break.

Yorick chose a few hundred of
the most attractive and vibrant

young people he could
find and convinced them

through skillful
persuasion or mind trickery

or what have you to start a
commune, a type of pagan cult.

Now cult leaders throughout time
have promised their followers

that the world was about to end
and that through their faith

these followers
would be protected

from that devastation.

But in this case,
Yorick actually

followed through on his promise.

For whatever reason,
dark magic or whatever,

the radiation did not affect
the members of the commune.

And to top that off, legend
says that the children

of the second son never
aged, could not be injured.

And their only
responsibility was

to make sure that no one
entered the threshold of hell.

But on the night of July
14, 2097, by some miracle,

Tex Kennedy did
just that, coming

face to face with Yorick, the
children of the second son,

and the infamous ritual
known as the beach party

at the threshold of hell.

[DANCE MUSIC]

-Hey.

Hey, it's Yorick!

[CHEERING]

-You ever seen some
shit like that before?

-Is everybody here?

Is everybody happy?

-Uh.

[SCREAMS]

-Let's note this then.

-Hey.

Good morning.

Wake up.

Rise and shine.

It's a brand new day.

[CRACKLE]

And you boys aren't
supposed to be here.

-Yeah.

Who the hell are you, slippy?

-How'd you get here?

-Listen, buddy, we
got a lot to do today.

So forgive us if we don't
stick around for the chitchat.

-I'm telling you, you
better turn around.

-And I'm telling
you that we walked

3,000 miles on foot to get here.

And things are going
to start changing.

I guarantee you that.

-Yeah, I'm not gonna
warn you again.

-Where's the, uh--
where's the guy?

-You're not getting
in to see Yorick.

-Yeah, Yorick.

Let's go see Yorick.

Let's go.

-Uh, only the purest of
heart get in to see Yorick.

-That's me, baby.

-Look, I'm going to
give you five seconds.

And then I'm going to
show you your lungs.

-Oh, word?

-Whoa.

Whoa.

Yeah, whoa.

Was that a threat?

Oh, I just-- I really,
um-- I hope it wasn't.

Because let me explain
something to you.

-Now things are going to
get real ugly around here.

You're coming in
and contaminating

the one pure source-- [GROANS]

-That's right.

Step right up.

Everybody's a winner.

-Ooh, it's really real now.

You ready to get low?

-Damn it.

You broke my rib.

-Oh, shit.

-Oh, god.

ELECTRONIC VOICE: Sector
six regeneration initiated.

-[INAUDIBLE]

[SCREAMING]

-Hey, listen, I know that you
and I have had our differences.

But you've got to come out
here and kill this guy, OK?

Just-- oh, balls.

[CHUCKLES]

MAN (OFFSCREEN): Shit.

Oh, shit, Benny.

Oh, shit.

TEX (OFFSCREEN): Good.

That worked out
pretty well for me.

NARRATOR: And so Tex Kennedy
met Yorick for the first time.

The man was ancient and, without
a more reasonable explanation,

was recorded in the
annals of history

as a spawn of lord Lucifer
of the kingdom of hell.

-Ha.

Benny Remington,
you're here at last.

-Hello, Yorick.

-Hello, Benny.

-You two know each other?

-Well, let's say
I know of Benny.

Benny Remington, oh,
the big celebrity,

here to lead the pack
and yackety yackety yack.

We got some machines.

-You're a Deluxe
R12 model, right?

-I'm the model of
headbutting you in.

-No.

-OK, uh, Benny, so I-- I
guess this is all as, uh,

King Clark Remington
prophesized, huh?

-My uncle.

Yeah.

Here I am.

-Here to take over for me.

-As far as I know.

-Uh-huh.

Well, that's horse shit.

-Well, that's not the
greatest attitude.

-Just joking, Benny.

I'm so glad having
you around here.

I wouldn't have thought you'd
be here in a million years.

-They found me in my bunker
four kilometers from here.

-Yeah.

You see, Zachary
here was supposed

to be the welcoming party--

-[SCREAMS] Jesus.

-For anybody trying
to come to get you.

And there you go.

So--

-Excuse me, uh, there's
some answers I still need.

-Another R56 model!

-Yo, you better
back up off me, man.

-This is my lucky day.

-What you doing, man?

Get off me.

There's no regenerative
properties on this one.

Still a sweet deal though.

I can reprogram these guys.

-I gotta remind you, you know
we have to execute the humans.

-What?

-You know, the mortals.

-Oh.

Oh, no, no, no.

They're all with me.

YORICK (OFFSCREEN): Well, it's
time we get rid of them, Ben.

-They're all needed here.

-Fuck it.

-No, there's--
there's things about--

-Benny, fuck it!

-Hey, hey, hey, hey.

OK.

Listen, I really apologize
for interrupting.

But, uh, I think I may have
an idea that can make us all

happy, um, in this--
this thing that--

YORICK (OFFSCREEN): Human, huh?

-Yeah, OK.

-Worthless to us.

-Oh, well, just
lay it on me, man.

Don't-- don't be
sensitive to my feelings.

-What does your face
look like after someone

kicks it in as hard as they can?

[CHUCKLING]

-OK, so I see.

We're just going to
start getting cute now.

[GROANS]

[COUGHING]

OK, good.

OK.

Hey!

You can't-- you can't
leave me in here!

Help!

There's a goddamn
animal in here.

Hey, Sue.

I think that, um, you and
I got off to a bad start.

I sure didn't want any
bad blood between us.

-It's too late for that now.

-I was going to bring you in
on every accomplishment that

had befell me and the boys.

-Really

-I was just-- I just
needed some time

to-- to kind of create an
understanding with you.

-An understanding between us?

-Are you gonna eat me?

-I'm not going to eat you.

-You're not?

-I don't think so.

TEX (OFFSCREEN): You don't know?

-No.

-Why the hell not?

-I don't know.

-You're not going to eat me?

-I'm not promising.

-After I locked you in a cage.

-Well.

-Like a goddamn circus freak.

-I don't know.

I don't know.

-Hey, Sue, back away.

Sue, get-- Sue,
back off, please.

-Yeah.

I'll take that.

-Sue could've killed
Tex any time, any time.

I don't care how many
robots you threw at her.

But she had this thing for Tex.

And in a way, they became New
America's first power couple.

I-- I don't know
what she saw in Tex.

I don't really understand women.

NARRATOR: And so the bizarre
reprogramming of Yul and Quincy

began.

-Rebooting.

Rebooting.

Rebooting.

NARRATOR: What Henry didn't know
was that Yul's human heart made

it impossible for him to be
reprogrammed against his will.

-Yo, what the hell
are you doing, man?

-Ah.

You didn't reboot.

-My bad.

Rebooting.

Rebooting.

Rebooting.

-You guys are
getting reprogrammed.

-Yay!

Stop copy.

Stop copy.

I'm blind!

[LAUGHING]

-Stop.

You look like an idiot.

Ugh, I'm tired of this.

No.

No.

Never, ever, never, never
touch the master's eyes.

Never, ever.

Yeah, good.

-That was fucking magical.

-Woo-hoo.

-Oh.

Ow.

[GROANS]

-Good morning.

-That was rough.

-I get carried away.

-You two should really rest up.

They say they're going
to get the train.

Let me introduce myself.

My name is Javier Castro.

-That's Sue.

I'm Tex.

-Kennedy.

I know, OK?

I know.

It's ironic, no?

Eight generations ago, your
forefather, President John

Kennedy, disputed my
forefather, Fidel Castro.

That was back home when
Cuba was still Communist.

-There's no such
thing as Communists.

-OK.

But now, after all
this strife, here we

are, trapped together,
a Kennedy and a Castro

in the threshold of hell.

-You came here from Cuba?

-[INAUDIBLE]

-There's no such thing as Cuba.

-Yes, there is.
-No, there's not.

-Yes, there is.
-No, there's not.

-Yes, there is.

Look, I came here three
days ago on a raft

to instill democracy,
theo-democratic individual

capital socialism to be a
[INAUDIBLE], a framework

for a civilized society here
in the anarchy of America,

a new world.

I made the journey from Havana.

But I did not expect to find
this aggressive encroachment

upon me.

I come in peace, OK?

And now, I just waiting to die,
which should be any day now.

-Well, that's sweet, kid.

You're like a--

-But you are going
to die with me.

You, me, and your
human eating friend.

-Hey, hey, hey.

My human eating girlfriend.

-Aw, isn't that precious?

-Quincy!

Praise Elvis.

There you are.

Where've you been, man?

Hey, we need to--
we need to-- we

need to get us out of here ASAP.

-Hold on.

Hold on.

What'd you call me?

TEX (OFFSCREEN): What?

-You called me Quincy, fuckface.

-They obviously
reprogrammed him.

-Javier, thank you.

I'm trying to my friend and--
Quincy, did they reprogram you?

-I don't know what the fuck
you two are talking about.

-That's the dumbest
thing I've ever heard.

You know that's the dumbest
thing I've ever heard.

-Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Hold on.

Listen, you ready to die?

TEX (OFFSCREEN):
Quincy, snap out of it.

-I fucking said,
you ready to die?

-Quincy, get off
the wall please.

You're going to hurt yourself.
-I'm not going to hurt myself.

-Get off before you
hurt yourself please.

-I can't-- I can't--
I never fall.

I never fall, because
I'm the fucking--

-Javier.

-Get up. [INAUDIBLE]

-Hey, Yul, help us out here.

-Oh, you're talking to me?

Dog, you don't
know me, all right?

-Tex, death is not your destiny.

-Oh, yes it is.

-No, it's not.

-Benny, do me a fucking favor.

Shut the fuck up.

-Oh, yeah.

They're right there.

-So, uh, what's the plan?

-Well, I-- I want to be fair.

I'll just wait here.

And you go get them.

-Our nation from
these poisoned masses.

I condemn the there of you
to death by radiated sea

snake in our bile lake!

[LAUGHING]

-Water's hot.

Jump right in.

-Let's make a deal, guys, OK?

You guys don't have anything
to worry about except

for me, because if you don't
go out there and get them,

I'm going to hang you from
a tree by your intestines.

OK?

-OK.

Uh, well, we'll just
head out into the water.

-Head first now.

That's good.

That's my boys.

-Hey, Yul, now's as
good a time as any

to tell him about
your human heart, OK?

QUINCY (OFFSCREEN): Oh, quit
your yapping and die already.

-It's not true, is it?

-Well, yeah.

I got a human heart.

-But bots can't be
reprogrammed with human hearts.

And

-I know.

-So what's the buzz, man?

-Well, I mean, I
figure, you know,

you motherfuckers
can only get killed

when you get your
eyes tagged, right?

-No, no, no.

So?

-So--

[SCREAMS]

-[INAUDIBLE]

[SCREAMING]

-Bye-bye, cutie pie.

-Whoa, whoa.

-[SCREAMS]

-Asshole.

Hold on.

I'm coming to get you.

-Hustle.

Come on.

That's my good old, dear old
boys, going down, down so deep

for me.

[SCREAMING]

[GASPING]

-Why'd it let us go?

-I don't know.

-Benjamin, let's seal the deal.

You're the king.

I still run this joint.

And, uh, we're going
to go announce it

over the gamma radio.

-Good.

-Zachary.

ZACH (OFFSCREEN): Yeah.

-Zachary.

-Yeah.

-Circle the lake.

Make sure everyone's dead.

-I can tell you right
now that they're not.

-You like that?

-Never do that again.

-We have to go back there.

-To the port?

-Yeah, you know, I walked
3,000 miles and all that.

-Well, Tex, I have to say,
I don't think that's--

-Listen, don't
worry about me, OK?

I got a plan.

And I think things
are going to be OK.

I'm angry now.

And when I'm angry,
I'm invincible.

-That's how you do it.

-You know I have to
kill you now, right?

NARRATOR: And so Tex and
Sue were captured yet again.

But this time, things
would be different.

Meanwhile, Yul found
himself scouring

the forests of the threshold
in his search for Tex.

-Oh.

-Oh, man.

I've been looking
everywhere for you.

-Quincy?

-Who's Quincy, numb nuts?

-Come on, man.

I don't have time for this, man.

-Time for what?

-Stop playing around, man.

I thought we had a--

-Time for this?

-What the hell are you doing?

Quincy, you're making
a big mistake, man.

-Oh, yeah?

-Oh, shit.

-The biggest mistake
you ever made

was turning on master Henry.

-[INAUDIBLE] an asshole, man.

57 years to every second
of every day of our life.

57 years, OK?

Come on, Quincy.

-Who the hell is Quincy?

-You gotta work with me.

You're getting really close
to my bio-drive, OK, Quincy?

ELECTRONIC VOICE:
Critically damaged.

-I hate robots.

ELECTRONIC VOICE: Face
card critically damaged.

-What the--

ELECTRONIC VOICE:
Shut down initiated.

-Shut down.

Shut down.

Shut down.

Shut down.

ELECTRONIC VOICE:
Shutdown complete.

-Shut down.

Shut down.

That's right!

That's right.

That's right!

Oh, this is the worst.

This is the worst place
that God ever puked up.

-Hey, Sue.

Hey.

My name's Franklin.

And the girls are
Veronica and Allison.

Yorick assigns me and the
girls to break our visitors

in because we're sadists.

-So Franklin, you're next, huh?

[LAUGHING]

-Yes!

-Let's get started.

[CHUCKLING]

You ready, sweetie?

[SCREAMS]

Honey, you're gonna want to
go with the flow on this one.

It'll make things a lot easier.

-Oh, good.

It's you.

-Hey, how's your head?

-Oh, you know, it's got
a little crack in it.

-Yeah.

Look, I'm done with this.

And I'm going to put
you out your misery.

[CHUCKLES]

-Maybe it's for the best.

-Yeah.

Well, when I kill you,
it's going to be personal.

So, um, you ever heard
of a little thing

called a slug monkey before?

-You're going to
have to remind me.

Is that with the,
um-- with a triple--

-Yeah, no.

That's where I stick my
hand down your throat

and I pull out your innards
through your big fat fucking

mouth.

-That sounds harsh.

-Yeah.

Well, man, you have no idea.

-OK.

OK.

Oh, hey.

Oh.

-Thorn.

-We have a lot to talk about.

-Good god.

Yeah, look, I'm-- I'm kind of
in the middle of something right

now.

So--

-It'll only take a sec.

-I thought you were dead.

-I'm not.

-You are blessed, my man.

You have no business here.

You don't belong here.

You were banished.

-My own brother let me die.

-Yeah, well, here you are.

-Well, it's payback time.

-Listen, I'm stronger than you.

You think there's honestly
anything you can do to hurt me?

I warned you.

[CHUCKLES] Your spine
is going to look

so great in my collection.

Identical.

[SWING MUSIC PLAYING]

-I think this is yours.

-I love it! [LAUGHS]

-Is this the radio room?

-Benny, do you
think-- you actually

think for one second I would
bring you into the radio room?

-Well then, would you please
just stop wasting my time?

I'm really not here to--

[SPLASH]

What is that?

-Oh, you mean the gasoline?

-Oh, stop it.

That stings.

-You like that?

Hey Ben, I gotta
tell you something.

I saw a picture
of the prophecies.

And you know something else?

I found something absolutely
fascinating in them.

You know what it was, Benny?

It was your destiny, Benny.

And it said, Benny
burns to death.

We don't need a unified America.

There's a reason
why the empire fell.

And, Benny, it's going to sting.

And that's why.

-I've travelled 3,000
miles to kill Benny,

and I'm not going to
let you do it for me.

T section, attack!

Hans, set an example.

-For fuck's sake, Jackle.

-Girdle, earn your umlaut.

-Mr. Jackle.

-Come on, Bock.

Go.

Go!

Aw.

Watch your step.

No.

Yeah-- OK.

Ha.

Oh, shit.

Jackle.

[SCREAMING]

-OK, so that didn't
work so well.

[MOTOR REVVING]

[YELLS]

-Let's just get out of here, OK?

-OK.

All right.

Let me take hear head.

[YELLS]

-So explain to me.

You came all this
way to get this guy.

And now what?

[YELLING]

Shut the fuck up.

[SCREAMING]

Fuck.

Oh, Benny. [SCREAMING]

Not the fucking eye.

Benny, god fucking damn it.

I told you thousands
of time, and you

through your fucking
bullshit prophecies

that Tex is the only one
that can take me down.

And Tex-- he's dead.

-I got you, didn't I?

Huh?

First time.

NARRATOR: And even as he was
defeating the spawn of Satan,

Tex had the sinking feeling
that this was all too easy.

-Whoa.

-When Yorick died or went
back to hell or whatever,

the children of the second
sun became vulnerable

for the first time in 20 years.

Now they could be hurt again.

Now they would have to age
like everyone else, which

of course was extremely poor
timing for three of them

in particular.

[YELLING] [SCREAMS]

-Fuck.

I can't--

-Franklin, what's the problem?

-[INAUDIBLE]

-Heal up.

Let's go.
-It's not working.

VERONICA (OFFSCREEN): What's
the hold up, Franklin?

-Back off, Veronica.

-It's not healing, Allison.

-Yes, I am.

I am.
I am.

It's just it's taking some time.

-I see a little bit, OK?

It looks like he's
healing a little bit just

around the edge here.

-Tell us, Franklin.

-Shut up.

Shit.

-[INAUDIBLE] and we have
to turn him in, you know.

If he lost the faith, and
he's not chosen anymore,

then we have to let him go.

-No one is turning
anyone in here.

-You stick with him,
this is your problem.

And I don't give a shit.

I'm going to go tell Yorick.

You decide whatever you want
to do, but he is not worth it.

[SCREAMS]

-You know, you're really
playing with fire here.

[SCREAMING]

-OK.

All right.

Hey, Jackle.

-Hi.

-You look like shit, man.

You gotta-- you
gotta give this up.

-Yeah, you know, it's not my
fault that your dad hated you.

-Benny.

-This is exactly what I
need right now, fellas.

Please, can you just
please get me down?

-I think we're going to
have to leave you here.

-I swear, this is-- I
will stomp your children.

-OK.

Well, um, I gotta go find Sue.

So, uh, you know,
keep it strong.

[SCREAMS]

Sorry.

I'm just going to--
I'm just going to go.

Benny, if you don't mind.

-Little girl.

You're a little girl.

You're a little girl.

You're a little girl.

[SCREAMING]

NARRATOR: Javier Castro
and the battered robot Yul

made their escape from the
borders of New America.

However they would later
return, bringing with them

New America's first foreign
ally, the lost island of Cuba.

-That's right.

Ever been to Havana, my friend?

Beautiful.

-Uh, Sue?

Hey, Sue?

Ah!

Son of a bitch.

Hey.

Ah, gross.

-How'd everything
turn out up there?

-Uh, you know, a lot
of pain and violence.

Satan was there.

-Things are about to
get a whole lot better.

-OK.

OK.

Just, uh, you got-- you
got something on your face.

NARRATOR: And so, as the first
phase of our nation's birth

draws to a close, Tex
Kennedy, having set forth

the events that would lead
to the rise of New America,

could finally focus on
his initial objective,

leading Benjamin Remington
to the radio tower,

broadcasting his voice to
all of New America's borders

and exalting him
as the new king.

However, as we know,
history has never

progressed quite
according to plan.

-All right.

We gotta rethink everything.

We gotta regroup.

First of all, has anybody
seen Yul or Quincy?

-Where the hell am I?

-Benny, I just want to be
the first one to apologize.

We completely underestimated
this entire deal.

We tried to play nice.

And we've done nothing but
get kicked in our asses.

But I swear to you all
right now that we've

got it all under
control, and there's not

going to be any more surprises.

MAN (ON RADIO): I
pray now as this day

has reached its conclusion--

-Oh, what is that?

MAN (ON RADIO): --that somewhere
over the vast deserts and wide

valleys--

-What is that noise?

MAN (ON RADIO): --over the tall
mountains and blue waters--

-Who is that?

MAN (ON RADIO): --that
my voice reaches you all

and gives you comfort.

NARRATOR: And so,
the radio tower

sprang to life for the
first time in three decades.

And the worst fear of
Tex Kennedy was realized.

-The future is now,
ladies and gentlemen.

I will lead this
handful of brave men

and brave women into the
breach of the unknown.

I may not have a million
mindless drone soldiers,

but we have the spirit that
made this nation great--

-Wow.

You see, I-- I didn't
see that coming.

MARCELLUS (ON RADIO):
--three centuries ago.

This message is for
the oppressors--

-If it's not one thing,
it's another, right?

MARCELLUS (ON RADIO):
--who have shut down

every element of humanity
that we inherently hold dear.

-I'll go with you.

-No, no no, no.

Just-- just go get Benny, OK?

-What if he's dangerous?

-Listen, he's not.

And anyway, I can't have my
girlfriend fighting for me, OK?

It's goddamn embarrassing.

MARCELLUS (ON
RADIO): I say to you

now that this is the
beginning of the end--

-Is any of this ever
going to get any easier?

MARCELLUS (ON RADIO):
--that the revolution

will begin here upon this soil.

-All right.

MARCELLUS (ON RADIO): And then
it will spread like a glow,

illuminating the hearts of the
masses of the masses of those

who have toiled without the
benefit of justice or freedom.

We are the future.

We are the hope.

I give you, throughout
the world, notice

that the nation of New
America has been born

and that the people of this
nation will not bow down,

will not cower.

And I will be there
every step of the way.

Finally, I call to the
people of New America.

It's time to be proud.

The road is before us now.

And anything is possible.

[PANTING]

-That was pretty good.

I was gonna say a lot
of that stuff myself.

[CHUCKLES]

That's a climb, huh?

Well, um, we got it
all under control here.

So if you just want
to go back downstairs,

I'll just take over.

-Tex, everything's just
been set in motion.

-I-- I'm sorry.

Who the hell are you?

-I came up today with Vincent.

-Ah, did you?

Yeah, Jackle.

He's having a bad day, huh?

-Where are your little robots?

-Um, uh, got me.

I lost them a while back.

-You came up here alone?

-Listen, would you just get
away from the microphone, man?

-You shouldn't have
come up alone, Tex.

-OK.

OK.

I get it.

Just-- that was,
what, 30 stories?

OK.

[PANTING]

-No reflex, as usual.

[GROANING]

-All right.

Relax.

That was good, man.

That really hurt because
that rib was broken already.

You know, to your
credit, a very small guy,

but, uh, you got a
pretty powerful-- yay.

[LAUGHS] I can be
fast too, right?

Oh, and he's not even limping.

That's awesome.

-Your purpose has more or less
run out in this whole thing.

I'm going to have to let you go.

But please understand that
this is all for the best.

-Well, I am great, huh?

That's, uh-- that's
good, actually,

because now I don't feel
like quite such a pussy.

Easy.

Easy.

-Your spirit is pretty good.

But you're just
thinking too small.

And this situation is infinitely
bigger than you can imagine.

[LAUGHS]

-You hear that?

First click.

[GROANS]

That's two clicks.

Die!

-Really, I don't hate you, Tex.

You should just pass
out and let this

happen without all the pain.

-I take pain for a living, pal.

I'd bet on me at this point.

-I knew you had it in you.

[FEEDBACK]

-Check.

Check.

One, two, three.

Check.

Ladies and gentlemen
of New America, this

is Tex Kennedy, your Vice King.

[DOOR CREAKING]

In just a few moments,
I'm going to let

you hear from your new
king, Benjamin Remington.

So, you know, stay
tuned for that.

But first of all, I
just want to let you all

know that this new nation does
not have to be afraid anymore,

because a new
tomorrow is dawning.

And I just want to promise
each and every last one of you

that the world's about to
get a shit load brighter.

[RADIO STATIC]

[MUSIC - POLAROID
KISS, "DAY TO DAY"]

[MUSIC - PRESERVATION HALL
JAZZ BAND, "BILL BAILEY"]