Original subtitles

The servant of god Michael is baptized.

SON OF SOFIA

I prefer your hair down.

Yes, but it's too hot.

Did you bring the DVDs?

Yes.

There must be a lot.

60.

50!

30 per year.

Right...

I asked a friend to send us the new episodes.

Which friend?

You don't know him. He transferred to our school after you left.

He's expecting your new address.

Why did you move?

I had to move in with a gentleman I was hired to look after.

It's only temporary.

He had a mild stroke when his wife died.

I thought it'd be you and me.

It won't make a big difference.

The Greek Olympic Games mascot Phoebos was named afterApollo-Phoebos,

the god of light, prophecy, and music.

Mascot Athena was named afterAthena, the goddess of wisdom.

Sofia is Greek for wisdom. Sofia, same as your mother.

How about you, son? Do you know who you were named after?

Yes, after Misha, the bear.

Who's Misha the bear?

The Moscow Olympic Games mascot.

Whatever gave him that idea?

It's something his dad used to say...

We called him teddy bear when he was little.

Tell him he was wrong. He was named afterArchangel Michael.

Is Mr. Nikos very rich?

No.

All he has is this apartment.

How many rooms?

There's the dining room, living room, kitchen, two bathrooms,

Mr. Nikos' bedroom, yours, and mine.

Eight in total.

You can turn around.

I got the sizes all wrong.

I have to replace everything.

Whose are these?

They're new I just bought them.

So, where's your room?

Top of the corridor, to your left.

Jack started to climb down the beanstalk as fast as he could.

When he touched the ground, he sawthe giant coming after him.

Mum?

Mum?

Are you asleep?

You forgot the DVDs.

Yes, I found them in the morning.

I putthem in my room.

We'll watch them when I get back.

No, I couldn't hear you, I was asleep.

No, I won't be late.

Do as Mr. Nikos says, 0K?

He'll take you to replace the clothes.

I have to go now Talk to you later.

Bye!

What's up?

Misha brought some old Poor Vera episodes on DVD.

What for?

So you can watch them again together?

Yes.

I had no idea he liked it.

Bring him overto my place next time there's a new episode on.

Misha doesn't know I've already seen them.

He called me every week for two years,

to catch me up on the show.

Inevertold him you had a satellite dish.

I see...

You know what?

I'd love to watchthem again too!

Maybel should come over one evening.

And finally meet your husband

and Misha.

I'll pretend I haven't seen them!

Greek lesson No. 1.

The family.

Afamily consists of the father,

the mother,

the siblings, the grandparents, the uncles,

the brothers-in-law and sisters-in-law,

the cousins once removed,

and other kinfolk.

Let's examine each one in detail.

My father was Michael Benakis,

Michael, just like you!

General!

General!

Your father

was Boris And reyev,

but from now on, I'm going to be yourfather.

I'm going to be yourfather.

Let's try and write this word down.

"Fa...

ther."

"Fa-ther."

Nowyou try it!

Never write with your left hand.

Right hand only!

In the name of Vladimir Ilyich Lenin,

in the presence of my comrades I do solemnly swear

to love my Motherland dearly,

to live in a manner bequeathed by the great Lenin

and taught by the Communist Party,

and to hold sacred the Laws ofthe Pioneers ofthe Soviet Union.

I, Misha Romanov,

a young pioneer of the USSR...

This is Vera Stepanova.

And this is her son Misha.

Vera told Misha she's expecting a baby.

In a few months, Misha will have a brother,

a half-brother.

Since Misha's father died years ago.

Pioneer, be ready to defend the Communist Party of the Soviet Union!

Always ready!

To think Vera's previous husband was so much younger than her new one!

Enough with the communist invasion for today!

Off to bed!

Goodnight.

Don't turn it off.

Will you lie down with me?

I don't like these clothes.

Sleep,

My beautiful good boy

Bayushki bayu

Quietly the moon is looking

Into your bed

I will tell you fairy tales...

What were you doing in Michael's room for so long?

He doesn't need so much pampering.

He's a man!

I was taking a shower.

Did you turn offthe boiler?

Yes.

Panayiotis called for tomorrow's TV shoot.

I'll take Michael with me.

Some discipline will do him good.

Little Red Riding Hood:

Once upon a time, a pretty little country girl

lived in the woods with her mother.

Everyone called her Little Red Riding Hood

for she refused to part with her red cap.

Tell me something!

Didn't you and Sofia also meet on a TV shoot?

That's rig ht.

What were you shooting?

A restaurant scene.

That's the best kind!

You spend the whole day eating and drinking!

The National Youth Organization

was established by Governor loannis Metaxas,

and is one of the more radical changes

of the National Renaissance of August 4th 1936.

Sometimes, we fall asleep to yourfairy tales at night.

Will you give me an autograph?

The Fairytales of Grandpa Earth

Thanks so much! - You're welcome.

Are you going on holiday this summer?

Why leave when the Olympics are coming to town?

I'm taking Michael to every sporting event.

You're rig ht, it's a historic moment.

Whose picture are you taking? We'll get yelled at.

The leading lady's.

It's for my mum.

She's a big fan.

Where are you from?

From Ukraine.

Little Michael's country? - No, he's Russian.

No way! - Russia, Ukraine, same difference!

What's your name?

Misha.

Michael!

I'm Victor.

Little Michael doesn't speak any Greek yet, does he?

He will soon. I'm giving him intensive lessons.

Is there a doctor in the house?

Yes, right here!

Break a leg!

Are you married?

Do you have a pen?

King, homeland, religion, and family:

These are the cornerstones

of the National Youth Organization.

Call me, if you need to!

Let's do one more take! Ready and... action!

Misha hasn't fallen asleep yet. He's going to hear us.

Aren't you doing mine?

You're just a kid.

No one will notice if your clothes are creased.

I want to go with you.

You can't.

You'll stay home with Mr. Nikos.

I don't want to live here anymore.

We talked about this before.

Enough already! You're giving me a headache!

It's impolite to speak a language I don't understand.

We have to stay a while.

Just a minute!

I'll be late for work.

He longed to fill his stomach with the pods the pigs were eating,

but no one gave him any.

That's when the prodigal son said, "I'll go back to my father."

The father called his servants and said,

"Bring me the fattened calf!"

"This son of mine was dead and is alive again."

"He was lost and is found."

Five Olympic Rings.

Five merging continents celebrating the return of the Olympic Games

to their country of origin.

Stop snacking. We're going to sit down to dinner soon.

Can't you see you've been putting on weight?

Why did you stop eating?

I'm not hungry any more.

How long is this going to last?

About three hours.

When are we going to watch Poor Vera?

We're not. Not today.

Nine-year-old Michael in his paper boat...

Sturdy, like little old Greece, no biggerthan a dot on the map...

His name is Michael, just like you!

Is Mr. Nikos an actor?

No.

What did he do before?

He used to be a headmaster. He also had a TV show for kids.

Stop speaking that language or he'll never learn Greek.

Everything I taught him will go down the drain.

Where's your wedding ring?

I left it at work.

You left it at work?

Yes.

What about his wife?

She was a housewife.

No kids?

None.

How come? - I don't know Why all the questions?

How old is he?

68... 69...

Grand pa is 62.

Young man, there are rules in this house.

Since you don't seem to get it,

someone has to spell it out foryou.

And if your motherwon't, then I will!

Misha, open up!

What's going on?

Please open the door!

How about some pelmeni?

Stop speaking that language!

I have all the ingredients.

We're in Greece! Speak Greek! Or must I learn Russian?

Mr. Nikos is a good man.

How about oladushki?

Sofia, this is infuriating!

Just tell me what you want me to cook!

Sofia, what did I say?

Misha, I'm sorry! I should have explained.

Stop it!

It's not Mr. Nikos' fault.

He's only trying to help.

We got married right before you came.

I tried to tell you but couldn't.

I just told him we're married, he didn't know

Misha, I did it for you!

OthenNise, you'd have had to wait longer.

Open up!

Now you know everything!

I couldn't bear living without you.

Misha, open up!

Please, open up.

Sleep,

My beautiful good boy

Bayushki bayu

Quietly the moon is looking

Into your bed

I will tell you fairy tales

And sing you little songs

But you must dream

With your little eyes closed

The time will come when you will learn

The soldier's way of life

Boldly you'll place your foot into the stirrup

And take the gun

While preparing for the dangerous battle

Please remember your mother

Sleep, good boy, my beautiful

I will die of yearning

Inconsolably waiting for your return

I'll pray the whole daylong

And when night comes, I'll dream of where you are.

I'll worry that you're in trouble

Far away in a strange land

Sleep now and know no sorrows

This is the ?rst golden metal for the Greek Olympic team!

These old dudes are so horny,

they don't notice I take photos while I fuck them.

Isn't it a hoot?

Yes...

Once you start,

it's hard to give up.

You begin to like it.

You'll see foryourself

if you get into it...

Does your mum knoiAf?

She wouldn't give a crap.

As long as I don't ask herformoney,

she doesn't care what! Do.

Besides, I'm only doing it for her.

Where is she?

She was here, but she moved to Italy with some guy.

Is that hers?

Yes.

But me, I'm not going anywhere!

I've got my training.

I'll get Greek citizenship,

I'll qualify forthe next Olympics, and go to Beijing!

How will you get by on your own?

I hadn't thought about it.

I'll help you out at first.

Worst case scenario, you can always go back.

The old man's probably loaded, if your mum's with him.

Are they married?

She just works for him.

Where is yourdad?

Someplace.

Where?

Someplace!

Any brothers or sisters?

How about you?

Nope.

What about your dad? Where is he?

I'm closer to you than I everwas to my real brother.

Moms and dads, and brothers and sisters,

it's all bullshit!

Hold it!

Great!

Come on!

Let's go!

Like it?

Bronze medal for Russia!

That guy's Russian.

Silver medal for the Ukraine!

He's Ukrainian.

Gold medal for...

Greece.

He's Georgian.

But he moved to Greece and his coach adopted him

so he could be in the Olympics underthe Greek flag.

He's Greek now!

Ladies and gentlemen,

the Greek national anthem!

I recognize you by your face

That violently de?nes the land

From the sacred bones,

Of the Greeks arisen...

You�ll find someone to fantasize about when you fuck old dudes.

You'd better think fast though.

You don't want your mind to go blank

while you're on thejob.

I usually picture the leading lady from that TV show

Her tits!

They really turn me on!

Some pervs even think of their mothers or sisters.

How's the water?

Is it getting cold?

Michael arrived from Russia a 15 days ago.

He was going to stay here for good.

He was very excited to see his mother again.

A fter his father died,

his mother - my wife - emigrated to Greece.

So your mummy married this guy.

They spent almost two years apart,

and now...

God only knows who he ran into.

I'm sorry! Can't go on.

It's all right.

His mother is going out of her mind!

And so am I!

The three of us were so happy together. Like a real family.

I gave him all my fatherly love, and he made me feel complete.

I feel for you, Mr. Benakis,

Your affection for children is well-known.

Especially when it's your own.

You'll always be "Grandpa Earth" to me.

I owe you my coming of age!

Thank you so much, Mr. Paraskevas.

Let's hope this story will have a happy ending.

This picture of Michael was taken just a few days ago.

But let's hear from Michael's mother.

Misha,

my little teddy bear...

Please come home!

If you can hear me,

please

come home to mama-bear.

Are you coming up?

The old man's waiting foryou.

Come on!

Howl regret all the wasted years

Before I ?nally found you

After waiting so long

Oh how! Fear! Might lose you

Because I'll never forget you

Stay by my side my love

Because! Need you to know

How I fear! Might lose you

How am I to forget you?

When I love you so?

This singer's first name was Sofia, just like your mother.

Sofia Vem bo.

Howl regret all the wasted years

Before I ?nally found you

After waiting so long...

the owners of the house returned home.

They were the seven dwarves.

As soon as they arrived home, they realised someone had beenthere.

Things weren't the same as they had left them.

The ?rst one said, "Who has been sitting in my chair?"

The second one, "Who has been eating my lunch?"

The third one, "Who has been eating my bread?"

The fourth one, "Who has been eating my vegetables?"

The ?fth one, "Who has been using my fork?"

The sixth one, "Who has been cutting with my knife?"

This will be our little secret.

Come over here.

Watch your step!

All this will be yours one day.

I have no idea what I'd have done if you hadn't come.

I've waited forthis moment all my life, and didn't even know it.

When you left, I almost went out of my mind.

You're my son and heir!

My successor.

"Grandpa Earth" finally has a son.

Greek lesson number 5.

As soon as the baby was born,

the fatherwould take it to the Elders for inspection.

When the child turned 7,

it was taken from his mother and given to the state.

A rigorous discipline

and military-type education commenced,

lasting twelve years.

Overseen by a "boy-herder",

the boys were drilled in gymnastics,

running,

jumping,

and were also taught to endure pain and hardship,

hunger, thirst, cold,

fatigue, and lack of sleep.

They were only taught the basics

of reading and writing.

Their allegiance to their country was fierce,

to the point of self-sacrifice.

When a mother saw her son off to war,

she always told him to fight bravely,

honor his armor and die for his country, if necessary.

Calm down, Vera!

Vera...

We need a doctor! Is there a doctor?

She just passed out.

She's 5 months pregnant!

You think she'll lose the baby at her dad's funeral?

No, she won't!

We only watched it a few months ago, don't you remember?

Are you asleep?

I forgot to tell you about the show

I'd only seen that one episode, at Nina's house.

I'm going to bed. Goodnight.

Those were the days, my friend

We thought they'd never end

We'd sing and dance

Forever and a day

We'd live the life we choose

We'd ?ght and never lose

For we were young

And sure to have our way

Thank you!

Happy birthday, Misha!

Let pedestrians run oddly on the street by the puddles

And the asphalt is flooded by rain

They cannot understand, that this day is not simple

And why I'm so happy today

And I'm playing the accordion

And all the people gaze at me

Such a pity, birthday parties

Are only once a year

What do we say?

Thank you.

Long live Michael

And happy birthday

May you grow old

With white hair

Can we get a picture together later?

For my mum!

It's so hot, where's my fan!

I won't eat now

I'll take the food to go.

Are you eating? - No way!

How about you?

Are you eating?

He's learning, eh?

I'm doing my best.

Where did he run off to when you were on TV?

I sent him out for a newspaper and he got lost.

Sofia must have been in agony?

Mr. Nikos, what's wrong?

Help! Somebody help!

We need a doctor! Is there a doctor?

For real!

We need an ambulance!

Something's wrong!

Somebody calla doctor!

Is he going to die?

May be.

Will you be sorry if he does?

Yes.

Do you love him?

In my own way.

Like you loved dad?

That was different.

Grandpa Earth

Armed Forces Television

presents a children's show

by Nikolaos Benakis

GRANDPA EARTH

Good evening.

When was this made?

1971.

The tape is in pretty good shape for its age.

What is he talking about?

Got any more?

Yes. What is he talking about?

It's kind of like... parenting advice.

"The hero does things he never knew he could.

"He slays dragons and solves riddles,

"until he can rescue the fair princess and marry her."

"So the fairy tale implies that it's not the father

"who stands between the boy and his mother, it's the dragon!"

"The boy doesn't really want the mother."

Grandpa! Tell me a story!

Fast-fonNard it.

Press play!

He encounters a terrible dragon!

The dragon fed daily on young damsels.

It's a hoot!

He plays all the parts himself.

He changes costumes and alters his voice.

He was a knight earlier,

and then a dragon.

Now he's the princess.

The king said, "Whoever kills the dragon

"will have the maiden's hand in marriage."

Now he's reading fan mail.

He says it's from 8-year-old Sofia from Karditsa.

"Dear Mr. Nikos,

"I'd love a rerun

"of Goldilocks and the Three Bears.

"And I'd like you to tell Santa Claus

"to bring me a bear for Christmas."

Can you imagine this guy in a bear costume?

As soon as the baby was born,

the father would take it to the Elders for inspection.

If they found it was deformed or weakly,

they'd throw it in the chasm of a nearby mountain.

Otherwise, they would return it to its mother.

When the child turned 7, it was taken and given to the state.

A rigorous discipline and military-type education commenced,

lasting twelve years.

So when a mother saw her son

off to war,

she always reminded him

to ?ght bravely,

honor his armor,

and die for his country, if necessary.

We're home!

Misha, we're home!

Will you close the door?

Let your hair down! You don't look like my mum.

But it's too hot.

Now we look more alike.

No matterwhat you do, you still look like your dad.

I think I saw you.

You're in the back, right-hand corner. Can you see?

Yes.

A doctor! Is there a doctor in the house?

Yes, right here!

Are you married?

That's it!

I wonder what happens next!

Mr. Nikos is an old pro!

A real veteran.

He was not bad.

I heard the screenwriter was pretty upset about the stroke.

He'll have to write him out ofthe story.

Little Michael is starting to look a bit like him.

You can tell he's Mr. Nikos' son.

May be...

Why have you left the shutters open? It's so hot!

I told Andreas we need air conditioning.

Do you have AC? - Only in the bedroom.

Notthe living room, huh? - No.

Doesn't little Michael get hot?

Don't you get hot?

In your country, you're not used to this kind of weather!

He hasn't said anything.

Did you go to the Olympics at all?

Mr. Nikos took Misha to the shooting range.

He'd gotten tickets to a swim event, too.

We're doing well in the medals department!

It's dripping.

Are you Russian, too?

No, I was born here.

But my parents are Georgian.

Oh well, Russia, Georgia, Ukraine, same difference!

Are you married?

No.

I hope you find a nice man, like Sofia found Mr. Nikos.

Thank you.

And have kids.

Sofia got lucky, people like Mr. Nikos are rare nowadays.

He even signed overthe house, didn't he Sofia?

Not to me.

To Misha.

Is little Michael going to school in September?

Yes.

Will he go to a Greek school? - Yes.

What grade?

I'm not sure. Nikos handled that.

Yes, he told us he was tutoring him.

Howfar along where they in history?

I can't really say.

I'll just ask Michael then!

Michael?

How far have you gotten with history and geography?

Do you understand me?

Are you hot?

Yes, aren't you?

Yes.

The iron is only making it worse.

Maybe I won't iron Nikos' clothes.

Who's going to notice anyway?

You know what?

You could sleep in our bedroom nowthat it's so hot.

Since we have air conditioning...

Rapunzel.

Once upon a time,

When she turned 11,

a witch shut her up in a tower with neither stairs nor door.

Just a little window near the top.

When the witch wanted to go up, she stood beneath and cried:

"Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your hair to me."

Rapunzel had magni?cent long hair, fine as spun gold."

Did you feed him?

Good!

Atta b oy!

No, you don't have to do anything.

Get some rest.

Bye!

I love you.

"Dear Mr. Nikos,

"I live really faraway, but one day, I'll come find you.

"I told my mum, and we'll come together.

"We'll take the bus or the train.

"My mum is really pretty, I bet you'll like her.

"You can marry her if you want

"and we can all be together forever.

"I f it works out, the three of us will be very happy.

"You will have a young and beautiful wife,

"my mum will have a husband, and I'll have a daddy!

"I'm also sending a drawing,

"of the three of us...

I've known love aplenty

I've known love aplenty

I've mated and parted

But no matter where I darted

You were always on my mind

Even in my dreams

My lips yearned for you

My soul searched for you

In secret! Longed for you

Howl regret all the wasted years

Before I ?nally found you

After waiting so long

Oh how! Fear! Might lose you

Because I'll never forget you

Stay by my side my love

Because! Need you to know

How I fear! Might lose you

How am I to forget you?

When I love you so?

My boy!

What's with the disguises?

It's his birthday today and I'm throwing him a party.

Acostume party?

How old is he?

75.

I've never been to a party for a 75-year-old.

Duce puts on his uniform

And his tall, feathered cap

One moonlit night

He sets out to invade Greece, poor guy!

Up in the mountains he encounters our brave evzone

Let's put the TV on, see what Grandpa says!

Jack is a child who's already grappling

with adolescence,

but he still hasn't managed

to overcome his Oedipal syndrome.

Jack isn't mature enough

to handle his blossoming sexuality.

My little rosebud, wanna blossom with me?

I'm not ready, I'm not mature enough to blossom!

What is this faggot talking about?

Is he a faggot?

What else would he be?

I bow at your feet. I want you to tame me!

Grandpa, tell me a story.

Story time!

Story time!

Settle down!

Once upon a time,

He and his mother were alone in the world

after his father died.

All they had to live on,

was a cow called Milky White.

Milky White gave plenty of milk each and every morning.

The old man is very sick.

I can tell.

He's a total vegetable.

This is probably going to be his last birthday.

Too bad...

Turns out, he and my mother are married.

But it's kind of make-believe. He's a faggot.

You'd never guess.

My mum told me all about it.

That's why I called you. I thought he might as well die happy.

I'll pay you.

I don't want your money.

Consider it a gift to my little brother!

He even asked my mum to put an end to his life.

He can't stand living like this.

I wouldn't either.

But my mother can't do it.

It's a tough deal.

I'm thinking of doing it myself.

Hour?

With one of his guns.

I'm a little scared, but I feel sorry for him.

I'd make it look like a suicide.

Will you help me out?

And I'm playing the accordion

And all the people gaze at me

Such a pity, birthday parties

Are only once a year

One, two,

three, go!

Well done!

Happy birthday!

To his surprise the giant woke up,

yelling: "I'll kill you, I'll kill you!"

What's up?

None of your business!

Jack started to climb down the beanstalk as fast as he could.

When he touched the ground,

he saw the giant coming after him.

Jack grabbed an axe

and started chopping down the beanstalk.

The beanstalk toppled over.

And the giant fell with a crash.

His cries echoed through the land!

Startled by the noise, his mother came running.

"We'll never be poor again," said Jack.

His mother embraced him.

They never lacked anything again

and they lived happily ever after!

Quick!

It's time to extinguish the Olympic Flame.

The audience

completes this magical image.

Mum!

Open up!

Open up!

Open up!

The stadium stands

Are getting quiet...

Time of miracles

Is melting away

Farewell to you,

Our tender Misha,

Go back home

To your wood of fairy tales

love...

With no end...

Bright and clear echo

Of the Olympics...

Forgive me.

I love you.

So much.

My little teddy bear.

The stadium stands are getting quiet

Time of miracles is melting away

Farewell to you, our tender Misha

Go back home to your wood of fairy tales

So let's wish lots of luck to each other

Let's wish kindness and love with no end

Bright and clear echo of the Olympics

Will forever be cherished and sung

Farewell to you, Moscow, farewell

Farewell, Olympic fairy tale...

SON OF SOFIA