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1
00:00:01,716 --> 00:00:03,508
Oh, it's-it's you again.
2
00:00:03,591 --> 00:00:05,675
Okay, here's-here's what--
here's what happened.
3
00:00:05,758 --> 00:00:07,675
Carrie put on
this brown wig
4
00:00:07,758 --> 00:00:09,466
and was running out
into traffic,
5
00:00:09,550 --> 00:00:12,633
and the guy I thought
was the bad guy isn't,
6
00:00:12,716 --> 00:00:15,008
and her boyfriend
is the suicide bomber.
7
00:00:15,092 --> 00:00:17,258
You believe that shit?
[laughs]
8
00:00:17,341 --> 00:00:19,466
- [man] Wrong show, Frank.
- What?
9
00:00:19,550 --> 00:00:21,466
[man] That's Homeland,
not Shameless.
10
00:00:21,550 --> 00:00:23,591
Oh.
11
00:00:23,675 --> 00:00:24,883
Fuck.
12
00:00:24,967 --> 00:00:27,050
Wow.
13
00:00:27,133 --> 00:00:28,925
Don't mix Percocet
with beer.
14
00:00:29,008 --> 00:00:30,925
♪ rock music ♪
15
00:00:31,008 --> 00:00:32,925
- Who's the new barback?
- [Veronica] That's Santiago.
16
00:00:33,008 --> 00:00:34,758
He's staying with us
until we find his father.
17
00:00:34,842 --> 00:00:36,883
They were gonna go live
with his uncle in Indiana.
18
00:00:36,967 --> 00:00:39,258
How are we gonna find
some random Guatemalan guy
19
00:00:39,341 --> 00:00:40,716
in Gary, Indiana?
20
00:00:40,800 --> 00:00:42,299
I did a web search:
"Where to find
21
00:00:42,383 --> 00:00:44,341
illegal immigrants,
Gary, Indiana."
22
00:00:44,424 --> 00:00:46,008
Got a whole list of places.
23
00:00:46,092 --> 00:00:47,466
[Tommy] You find
Santiago's uncle?
24
00:00:47,550 --> 00:00:49,591
Oh, yeah. Found him
and then lost him.
25
00:00:49,675 --> 00:00:51,133
Fly, my Mexican friend!
26
00:00:51,216 --> 00:00:53,883
- Guatemalan.
- Guatemalan friend!
27
00:00:53,967 --> 00:00:55,466
Fly!
28
00:00:55,550 --> 00:00:57,925
Liam, your share
of the bills this month: $70.
29
00:00:58,008 --> 00:01:00,008
- I'm nine.
- Figure it out.
30
00:01:00,092 --> 00:01:02,800
Carl, your share of the bill
this month is 70 bucks.
31
00:01:02,883 --> 00:01:04,466
Maybe you should get
a real job
32
00:01:04,550 --> 00:01:05,842
and stop hanging out
with your girlfriend so much.
33
00:01:05,925 --> 00:01:07,550
Ingrid and I are pregnant.
34
00:01:07,633 --> 00:01:09,174
- Triplets?
- Sextuplets.
35
00:01:09,258 --> 00:01:11,092
And we're hiding
from a North Korean
36
00:01:11,174 --> 00:01:13,508
fertility specialist,
so make room.
37
00:01:13,591 --> 00:01:14,800
We are moving in.
38
00:01:14,883 --> 00:01:16,466
Oh, that's hysterical.
39
00:01:16,550 --> 00:01:18,133
Do you really think
we can afford more than one?
40
00:01:18,216 --> 00:01:19,383
You'll get a job.
41
00:01:19,466 --> 00:01:21,299
[laughs]
42
00:01:21,383 --> 00:01:23,092
"Dreams dead?
You're our man.
43
00:01:23,174 --> 00:01:25,133
Be the Hobo Loco Man."
Kev, what is this?
44
00:01:25,216 --> 00:01:26,716
They're holding a competition
45
00:01:26,800 --> 00:01:30,133
to choose the Hobo Loco
spokesperson.
46
00:01:30,216 --> 00:01:32,675
The winner gets
a $50,000 contract
47
00:01:32,758 --> 00:01:35,800
to be in a social media
campaign.
48
00:01:35,883 --> 00:01:37,508
This is me.
49
00:01:37,591 --> 00:01:39,550
I'm the Hobo Loco Man.
50
00:01:39,633 --> 00:01:41,550
You smell like a barroom floor.
51
00:01:41,633 --> 00:01:43,133
♪♪♪
52
00:01:43,216 --> 00:01:46,133
I don't need
anything from you!
53
00:01:46,216 --> 00:01:47,258
She do this a lot?
54
00:01:47,341 --> 00:01:48,550
[Lip] Yeah.
55
00:01:48,633 --> 00:01:50,383
Well, lately.
56
00:01:57,174 --> 00:02:00,133
♪ rock music ♪
57
00:02:00,216 --> 00:02:04,258
♪♪♪
58
00:02:04,341 --> 00:02:07,258
♪ Think of all
the luck you got ♪
59
00:02:07,341 --> 00:02:10,591
♪ Know that
it's not for naught ♪
60
00:02:10,675 --> 00:02:13,758
♪ You were beaming
once before ♪
61
00:02:13,842 --> 00:02:18,050
♪ But it's not like that
anymore ♪
62
00:02:18,133 --> 00:02:21,424
♪ What is this downside ♪
63
00:02:21,508 --> 00:02:24,883
♪ That you speak of? ♪
64
00:02:24,967 --> 00:02:26,967
♪ What is this feeling ♪
65
00:02:27,050 --> 00:02:31,633
♪ You're so sure of? ♪
66
00:02:31,716 --> 00:02:36,591
♪♪♪
67
00:02:38,550 --> 00:02:41,800
♪ Round up
the friends you got ♪
68
00:02:41,883 --> 00:02:44,883
♪ Know that
they're not for naught ♪
69
00:02:44,967 --> 00:02:48,216
♪ You were willing
once before ♪
70
00:02:48,299 --> 00:02:52,466
♪ But it's not like that
anymore ♪
71
00:02:52,550 --> 00:02:55,925
♪ What is this downside ♪
72
00:02:56,008 --> 00:02:59,341
♪ That you speak of? ♪
73
00:02:59,424 --> 00:03:01,174
♪ What is this feeling ♪
74
00:03:01,258 --> 00:03:05,216
♪ You're so sure of? ♪
75
00:03:06,133 --> 00:03:09,424
[distant siren wailing]
76
00:03:09,508 --> 00:03:11,133
[train rumbling]
77
00:03:15,925 --> 00:03:18,967
♪ rock music ♪
78
00:03:19,050 --> 00:03:23,925
♪♪♪
79
00:03:24,008 --> 00:03:26,633
♪ Silicone sour ♪
80
00:03:26,716 --> 00:03:29,842
♪ Burning the hours
of the night away ♪
81
00:03:29,925 --> 00:03:32,925
♪♪♪
82
00:03:33,008 --> 00:03:35,258
♪ In retro bass ♪
83
00:03:35,341 --> 00:03:39,050
♪ From the east side
moving right away ♪
84
00:03:39,133 --> 00:03:40,383
♪♪♪
85
00:03:40,466 --> 00:03:42,800
♪ You're a satellite ♪
86
00:03:42,883 --> 00:03:44,925
[humming]
87
00:03:45,008 --> 00:03:48,050
♪ And I'm on your website ♪
88
00:03:48,133 --> 00:03:50,466
♪♪♪
89
00:03:50,550 --> 00:03:53,466
♪ Miley doesn't miss you ♪
90
00:03:53,550 --> 00:03:57,383
♪ She got the spread
on the college issue ♪
91
00:03:57,466 --> 00:03:59,508
♪♪♪
92
00:03:59,591 --> 00:04:02,133
♪ You're gonna try
to save her ♪
93
00:04:02,216 --> 00:04:03,133
♪ You start to blame her... ♪
94
00:04:03,216 --> 00:04:04,967
Oh, shit.
95
00:04:05,050 --> 00:04:06,258
You open?
96
00:04:06,341 --> 00:04:08,967
♪ So you gotta be famous ♪
97
00:04:09,050 --> 00:04:11,050
Twenty-four hours.
98
00:04:11,133 --> 00:04:12,633
♪ It's a golden age ♪
99
00:04:12,716 --> 00:04:14,008
You sit wherever you want.
100
00:04:14,092 --> 00:04:15,675
♪♪♪
101
00:04:15,758 --> 00:04:19,092
♪ It's a golden age ♪
102
00:04:19,174 --> 00:04:20,508
♪♪♪
103
00:04:20,591 --> 00:04:22,258
♪ It's a golden age ♪
104
00:04:22,341 --> 00:04:24,299
I'll bring menus to you.
105
00:04:24,383 --> 00:04:25,550
Are you hiring?
106
00:04:25,633 --> 00:04:26,716
♪ It's a golden age ♪
107
00:04:26,800 --> 00:04:27,842
What?
108
00:04:27,925 --> 00:04:28,591
I'm a hard worker.
109
00:04:28,675 --> 00:04:30,758
♪♪♪
110
00:04:30,842 --> 00:04:32,092
[radio clicks off]
111
00:04:32,174 --> 00:04:33,633
How about this booth
right over here?
112
00:04:42,341 --> 00:04:44,299
Got any more
where this came from?
113
00:04:46,758 --> 00:04:50,341
Couple hours after last call,
but get you some coffee.
114
00:04:50,424 --> 00:04:52,550
So you're just drinking
on the job, then?
115
00:04:53,842 --> 00:04:56,216
Everything okay
out here, Fiona?
116
00:05:05,550 --> 00:05:07,258
Let's get out of here.
117
00:05:21,591 --> 00:05:22,675
[Fiona softly] Shit.
118
00:05:26,341 --> 00:05:28,341
Shit.
Shit.
119
00:05:28,424 --> 00:05:29,967
Shit.
120
00:05:30,050 --> 00:05:30,967
You all right?
121
00:05:33,299 --> 00:05:34,508
Yeah.
122
00:05:36,383 --> 00:05:37,758
Good.
123
00:05:39,383 --> 00:05:42,383
♪ rock music ♪
124
00:05:42,466 --> 00:05:47,550
♪♪♪
125
00:05:56,299 --> 00:05:58,008
Nothing but junk mail.
126
00:05:59,842 --> 00:06:01,842
Rat shit in the attic.
127
00:06:01,925 --> 00:06:03,341
Fires in the dryer vent.
128
00:06:03,424 --> 00:06:05,216
These ads are terrifying.
129
00:06:05,299 --> 00:06:07,424
Carbon monoxide leaks
from the furnace?
130
00:06:07,508 --> 00:06:09,050
Fiona always handled
this shit.
131
00:06:09,133 --> 00:06:11,008
Should I be worried
about these things?
132
00:06:11,092 --> 00:06:13,341
Ah, homeowner stuff.
133
00:06:13,424 --> 00:06:15,550
Sucks to be an adult.
134
00:06:23,216 --> 00:06:25,800
What?
I'm eating for seven now.
135
00:06:25,883 --> 00:06:27,466
Well, then all seven of you
are gonna need
136
00:06:27,550 --> 00:06:29,424
to cough up cash
if you're gonna be living here.
137
00:06:29,508 --> 00:06:30,675
All right.
138
00:06:30,758 --> 00:06:32,050
I'm gonna do
some therapy sessions
139
00:06:32,133 --> 00:06:33,591
on the phone
this afternoon.
140
00:06:33,675 --> 00:06:35,508
I'll write you a check later.
141
00:06:37,424 --> 00:06:38,967
[Debbie] Hey.
Where you guys going?
142
00:06:39,050 --> 00:06:40,716
Softball camp.
143
00:06:40,800 --> 00:06:43,424
I got a call from one of those
20 jobs I applied for.
144
00:06:43,508 --> 00:06:45,050
Nice.
Which one?
145
00:06:45,133 --> 00:06:46,591
Some seafood
restaurant place.
146
00:06:46,675 --> 00:06:49,133
Carl Gallagher's
going legit.
147
00:06:49,216 --> 00:06:50,424
Minimum wage?
148
00:06:50,508 --> 00:06:52,133
Only job someone like me
can get.
149
00:06:52,216 --> 00:06:53,716
You know, you really
can't put "drug dealer"
150
00:06:53,800 --> 00:06:55,299
or "gunrunner"
on your West Point app.
151
00:06:55,383 --> 00:06:57,466
Come on, babe.
152
00:06:57,550 --> 00:06:58,842
[Liam] Can we call
the plumber guy?
153
00:06:58,925 --> 00:07:01,299
Says he can snake our tub
for ten bucks.
154
00:07:01,383 --> 00:07:02,675
What's wrong with our tub?
155
00:07:02,758 --> 00:07:04,341
It has two inches
of scummy water in it
156
00:07:04,424 --> 00:07:06,216
all the time
that doesn't drain.
157
00:07:06,299 --> 00:07:07,967
Good morning, family one.
158
00:07:08,050 --> 00:07:09,716
Family two.
159
00:07:09,800 --> 00:07:11,341
Why do you look
like a farm animal?
160
00:07:11,424 --> 00:07:12,758
[Liam]
Smell like one too.
161
00:07:12,842 --> 00:07:15,675
Your father is gonna be
the new Hobo Loco
162
00:07:15,758 --> 00:07:17,842
beverage spokesperson.
163
00:07:17,925 --> 00:07:20,716
Now, I haven't won
the competition yet, Ingy.
164
00:07:21,174 --> 00:07:22,925
Hobo what-o?
165
00:07:23,008 --> 00:07:25,258
It's a delicious
alcoholic beverage.
166
00:07:25,341 --> 00:07:26,842
They're looking for someone
167
00:07:26,925 --> 00:07:28,424
with no purpose in life.
168
00:07:28,508 --> 00:07:30,758
I finally found my calling.
169
00:07:30,842 --> 00:07:34,383
Soon I'll be able
to support those I love.
170
00:07:35,133 --> 00:07:36,466
Oh, yeah.
171
00:07:39,842 --> 00:07:41,424
Wish me luck.
172
00:07:41,508 --> 00:07:45,299
Oh, you go get 'em,
my Hobo Loco tiger.
173
00:07:45,383 --> 00:07:47,842
Good-bye, little Frank-ettes.
174
00:07:50,424 --> 00:07:52,466
[both sigh]
175
00:07:54,008 --> 00:07:55,925
No need to even hold
a competition.
176
00:07:56,008 --> 00:07:57,424
If it involves alcohol,
177
00:07:57,508 --> 00:07:58,925
they should just
give him the prize.
178
00:08:00,383 --> 00:08:02,842
Think we need to worry
about termites?
179
00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:07,508
[train rumbling]
180
00:08:07,591 --> 00:08:09,216
The hell's going on?
181
00:08:09,299 --> 00:08:11,050
Jesus, it's almost 7:30.
182
00:08:11,133 --> 00:08:12,800
Place is closed.
183
00:08:12,883 --> 00:08:14,758
W-well, where's Fiona?
184
00:08:14,842 --> 00:08:16,633
We already turned away
a bunch of customers.
185
00:08:16,716 --> 00:08:18,050
Well, let's get set up fast
186
00:08:18,133 --> 00:08:19,842
so we don't lose
any more business.
187
00:08:20,842 --> 00:08:21,925
Okay, let's get
the coffee going.
188
00:08:22,008 --> 00:08:23,383
Fire up the grills.
189
00:08:23,466 --> 00:08:24,299
Make sure the ketchups
are married.
190
00:08:24,383 --> 00:08:25,508
I'll get the blinds.
191
00:08:27,383 --> 00:08:28,341
All right,
set the tables.
192
00:08:28,424 --> 00:08:29,883
Let's go, guys.
Come on.
193
00:08:35,258 --> 00:08:36,883
Hey, Eliza.
194
00:08:40,174 --> 00:08:42,092
[Eliza scoffs]
She alive?
195
00:08:42,174 --> 00:08:43,758
Yo, wakey-wakey!
196
00:08:43,842 --> 00:08:45,216
- Get the fuck away from me!
- Whoa, whoa!
197
00:08:45,299 --> 00:08:46,341
[Tyesha] Take it easy!
198
00:08:46,424 --> 00:08:48,341
[sighs] Shit.
199
00:08:48,424 --> 00:08:49,800
Sorry.
200
00:08:49,883 --> 00:08:51,424
You okay?
201
00:08:51,508 --> 00:08:53,967
Yeah.
Uh, what time is it?
202
00:08:54,050 --> 00:08:55,716
Why was this place locked?
203
00:08:57,424 --> 00:09:00,383
Oh, uh...
204
00:09:00,466 --> 00:09:03,008
I was doing the cash
out late,
205
00:09:03,092 --> 00:09:04,883
and I, uh, went
into the back office
206
00:09:04,967 --> 00:09:06,967
for a second,
and these...
207
00:09:07,050 --> 00:09:09,299
three sketchy guys
just came out of nowhere,
208
00:09:09,383 --> 00:09:10,800
and I thought they were
gonna rob me
209
00:09:10,883 --> 00:09:12,716
or...I don't know what.
210
00:09:12,800 --> 00:09:15,008
[Eliza] My God.
Are you okay?
211
00:09:15,092 --> 00:09:16,466
I-I locked up.
I didn't know
212
00:09:16,550 --> 00:09:17,925
if they were still
hanging around,
213
00:09:18,008 --> 00:09:19,383
and I didn't want to go home
or take the L that late
214
00:09:19,466 --> 00:09:21,008
in case they tried
to follow me.
215
00:09:22,716 --> 00:09:25,508
You left the cash out when
you went in the back office?
216
00:09:27,050 --> 00:09:28,092
Yeah, it's fine.
217
00:09:31,800 --> 00:09:33,008
All right.
218
00:09:33,092 --> 00:09:35,842
Um, I'm gonna go
and take a shower,
219
00:09:35,925 --> 00:09:39,383
and, uh, I will be back
for the lunch shift,
220
00:09:39,466 --> 00:09:41,258
and it won't happen again.
221
00:09:46,508 --> 00:09:48,216
[Tami] See?
Shampoo.
222
00:09:48,299 --> 00:09:50,383
Not dish liquid.
223
00:09:50,466 --> 00:09:52,008
That's an interesting concept.
224
00:09:52,133 --> 00:09:53,216
Here, let me show you.
225
00:09:54,800 --> 00:09:56,258
All right.
226
00:10:00,716 --> 00:10:03,633
Oh, man.
Yeah, that, uh...
227
00:10:03,716 --> 00:10:05,508
that actually feels
really good.
228
00:10:05,591 --> 00:10:07,466
I give great head, huh?
229
00:10:07,550 --> 00:10:08,967
Yeah, it's better
than your regular head.
230
00:10:09,050 --> 00:10:10,258
- Hey!
- [Tahetia] Knock, knock, knock!
231
00:10:10,341 --> 00:10:11,800
- Just me.
- [Lip] Jesus, dude!
232
00:10:11,883 --> 00:10:12,967
And I'm not looking
at your dick.
233
00:10:13,050 --> 00:10:14,050
I just left my retainer
in here.
234
00:10:14,133 --> 00:10:15,550
Ew!
235
00:10:15,633 --> 00:10:17,092
I lied.
I looked at your dick. Bye!
236
00:10:17,174 --> 00:10:18,633
Hey, your stupid boyfriend
still owes me $300
237
00:10:18,716 --> 00:10:20,800
for the Comcast bill!
238
00:10:22,675 --> 00:10:24,675
You gotta lose those guys.
239
00:10:24,758 --> 00:10:25,883
Yeah, then I gotta go
through the bullshit
240
00:10:25,967 --> 00:10:27,716
of getting a new roommate.
241
00:10:27,800 --> 00:10:29,883
Okay, turn around.
Your turn.
242
00:10:30,883 --> 00:10:33,174
- All right.
- Are you off today?
243
00:10:33,258 --> 00:10:34,633
Yeah.
244
00:10:34,716 --> 00:10:36,092
Me too.
245
00:10:36,174 --> 00:10:37,216
Oh.
246
00:10:37,299 --> 00:10:39,050
We should do something.
247
00:10:39,133 --> 00:10:41,092
Why? You're not
hanging around with Boone?
248
00:10:41,174 --> 00:10:43,383
[laughs] No, he's on his way
back to Yemen.
249
00:10:43,466 --> 00:10:45,216
Isn't that where
all those land mines are?
250
00:10:45,299 --> 00:10:46,925
Fingers crossed.
251
00:10:47,008 --> 00:10:49,258
So let's hang out.
Never done that before.
252
00:10:49,341 --> 00:10:51,675
We could see if we even
like each other.
253
00:10:51,758 --> 00:10:53,633
I got boring shit
to do all day.
254
00:10:53,716 --> 00:10:56,258
Me too.
We can do it together.
255
00:10:56,341 --> 00:10:59,299
Aah!
Turn around.
256
00:10:59,383 --> 00:11:01,050
- Take a look.
- Oh, nice.
257
00:11:01,133 --> 00:11:02,591
- It's good.
- Yeah, I like it.
258
00:11:02,675 --> 00:11:03,800
Right, you see,
I give good head too.
259
00:11:03,883 --> 00:11:06,925
[laughs]
What is this?
260
00:11:07,800 --> 00:11:11,216
[Santiago]
Diablas! Las diablas!
261
00:11:11,299 --> 00:11:12,716
Santiago.
262
00:11:12,800 --> 00:11:14,716
He probably had
a nightmare again.
263
00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:16,299
[Santiago yelling]
264
00:11:16,383 --> 00:11:17,508
- [Santiago] Ow!
- [girls] Die! Die!
265
00:11:17,591 --> 00:11:20,299
[Santiago] speaking Spanish
266
00:11:20,383 --> 00:11:22,341
Girls!
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
267
00:11:22,424 --> 00:11:25,383
- Stop. What are you doing?
- Hey! You're hurting him!
268
00:11:25,466 --> 00:11:27,508
- [Kev] You duct taped him?
- [Veronica] And handcuffs?
269
00:11:27,591 --> 00:11:29,092
Santiago, I am so sorry.
270
00:11:29,174 --> 00:11:30,800
You have to forgive them.
271
00:11:30,883 --> 00:11:32,800
The-the girls
are a little bit wild.
272
00:11:32,883 --> 00:11:35,341
Preschool was supposed
to be taming them.
273
00:11:35,424 --> 00:11:37,716
Come on, baby.
Let's go get you some juice.
274
00:11:38,967 --> 00:11:41,716
Girls, what has gotten
into you?
275
00:11:41,800 --> 00:11:44,174
- We don't hurt people.
- We don't?
276
00:11:44,258 --> 00:11:46,424
No, of course not.
We have to be nice,
277
00:11:46,508 --> 00:11:48,258
and Santiago's
part of our family.
278
00:11:48,341 --> 00:11:50,550
- No.
- Yes, honey,
279
00:11:50,633 --> 00:11:52,383
and his sister's
gonna be here soon too.
280
00:11:52,466 --> 00:11:54,591
No, they go home.
281
00:11:54,675 --> 00:11:56,591
They don't have a home.
282
00:11:56,675 --> 00:11:59,008
Bad people wanted
to turn them into sex slaves
283
00:11:59,092 --> 00:12:00,174
and gang members.
284
00:12:00,258 --> 00:12:01,758
Kev, please stop talking.
285
00:12:01,842 --> 00:12:03,174
I'm trying to teach them.
I'm--
286
00:12:03,258 --> 00:12:04,758
They're four years old.
Come on, girls.
287
00:12:04,842 --> 00:12:05,800
It's time to get dressed
for school.
288
00:12:05,883 --> 00:12:07,383
Take Santiago to the bar.
289
00:12:10,050 --> 00:12:11,299
[Kev] Santiago.
290
00:12:11,383 --> 00:12:13,174
What do you say?
291
00:12:13,258 --> 00:12:15,174
Me and you having some
quality dad time together?
292
00:12:15,258 --> 00:12:16,550
Huh?
Let's do it!
293
00:12:16,633 --> 00:12:18,133
- [whimpers]
- No, no.
294
00:12:18,216 --> 00:12:19,883
God, I'm so sorry.
295
00:12:21,508 --> 00:12:22,758
[indistinct chatter]
296
00:12:22,842 --> 00:12:24,008
Yeah, just hold up the shirt.
297
00:12:24,092 --> 00:12:26,383
Nice!
298
00:12:26,466 --> 00:12:29,842
Hey, Hobo Loco is trending
in the top 50 right now.
299
00:12:29,925 --> 00:12:31,383
Thought we'd have, like,
30 homeless here
300
00:12:31,466 --> 00:12:32,383
and that'd be it.
301
00:12:32,466 --> 00:12:35,216
[laughs]
Hey, everyone!
302
00:12:35,299 --> 00:12:37,424
Let me all hear you say,
303
00:12:37,508 --> 00:12:39,675
"I love Hobo Loco!"
304
00:12:39,758 --> 00:12:42,675
[all] I love Hobo Loco!
305
00:12:42,758 --> 00:12:45,883
[crowd cheering]
306
00:12:48,508 --> 00:12:50,174
Are you fucking kidding me?
307
00:12:50,258 --> 00:12:51,800
Who are all these people?
308
00:12:51,883 --> 00:12:53,883
Jesus.
309
00:12:53,967 --> 00:12:58,216
Hey, is everybody here
for the Hobo Loco competition?
310
00:12:58,299 --> 00:13:00,716
Apparently so,
but I'm gonna win this thing.
311
00:13:02,008 --> 00:13:04,800
Gonna be hard,
since I'm a shoo-in.
312
00:13:04,883 --> 00:13:06,508
That right?
313
00:13:06,591 --> 00:13:09,466
I've never held the same job
for more than 37 days.
314
00:13:09,550 --> 00:13:12,008
I spent my life savings
on a Blockbuster franchise
315
00:13:12,092 --> 00:13:13,633
in 2013.
316
00:13:15,008 --> 00:13:18,050
I buried a bipolar wife,
a cancer-riddled girlfriend,
317
00:13:18,133 --> 00:13:20,050
and a mother
who never loved me.
318
00:13:20,133 --> 00:13:22,050
Two-thirds of my penis
got blown off
319
00:13:22,133 --> 00:13:24,050
in the First Gulf War.
320
00:13:24,133 --> 00:13:26,591
I won the lottery in 2006
321
00:13:26,675 --> 00:13:28,466
and accidentally used
the winning ticket
322
00:13:28,550 --> 00:13:30,383
as a rolling paper.
323
00:13:30,466 --> 00:13:32,675
I grew up in Flint, Michigan.
324
00:13:37,299 --> 00:13:38,299
Frank Gallagher.
325
00:13:38,383 --> 00:13:39,925
Mikey O'Shea.
326
00:13:41,050 --> 00:13:43,133
Irish, huh?
327
00:13:43,216 --> 00:13:46,383
Well, the dead junkie
whose wallet I acquired was.
328
00:13:46,466 --> 00:13:47,925
Very impressive.
329
00:13:49,216 --> 00:13:50,508
Why do these fucking posers
330
00:13:50,591 --> 00:13:52,842
think they can steal
our thunder?
331
00:13:52,925 --> 00:13:54,508
Because their parents
told them
332
00:13:54,591 --> 00:13:56,424
they could be anything
they wanted to be.
333
00:13:56,508 --> 00:13:58,675
[laughs]
334
00:13:58,758 --> 00:14:00,258
Let's teach 'em a lesson.
335
00:14:00,341 --> 00:14:01,299
Let's kick ass.
336
00:14:01,383 --> 00:14:02,550
Excuse us.
Excuse us.
337
00:14:02,633 --> 00:14:03,550
- Excuse me!
- Excuse us.
338
00:14:03,633 --> 00:14:04,925
- VIP!
- Coming through.
339
00:14:05,008 --> 00:14:06,258
Coming through. This way.
One second.
340
00:14:06,341 --> 00:14:07,341
Look out. Oh, hey,
hey, hey, hey, hey.
341
00:14:07,424 --> 00:14:09,133
Let the real hobos through!
342
00:14:09,216 --> 00:14:10,925
Don't be rude.
Don't be rude.
343
00:14:11,008 --> 00:14:12,092
- Hey, hey, hey, hey!
- Come on, excuse us.
344
00:14:12,174 --> 00:14:14,174
- Hey! Hey, hey, hey.
- Good God.
345
00:14:14,258 --> 00:14:16,133
We're here
for the competition.
346
00:14:16,216 --> 00:14:18,299
- [Frank] Where do we sign?
- They cut the line!
347
00:14:18,383 --> 00:14:20,092
- [crowd yelling]
- And that's exactly
348
00:14:20,174 --> 00:14:21,716
the kind of spunk
we're looking for.
349
00:14:21,800 --> 00:14:23,050
Do you hear that,
Phi Piggie Piggie?
350
00:14:23,133 --> 00:14:24,550
That's what they're
looking for.
351
00:14:24,633 --> 00:14:27,174
Get your spunk-less ass
out of here!
352
00:14:27,258 --> 00:14:29,008
- [Frank] You should learn.
- [Amber] Hey, fellas.
353
00:14:29,092 --> 00:14:30,424
I just--I just need you
to sign in right here.
354
00:14:30,508 --> 00:14:31,508
Oh, right away.
355
00:14:31,591 --> 00:14:32,675
- Done.
- Again, yeah.
356
00:14:32,758 --> 00:14:34,092
Great.
Mm-hmm.
357
00:14:34,174 --> 00:14:35,424
Okay, next,
I'm gonna need to test
358
00:14:35,508 --> 00:14:37,550
your baseline
blood alcohol content.
359
00:14:37,633 --> 00:14:39,842
Right this way.
360
00:14:39,925 --> 00:14:41,842
Here we are.
361
00:14:43,758 --> 00:14:44,633
♪ rock music ♪
362
00:14:44,716 --> 00:14:46,675
[both blowing heavily]
363
00:14:46,758 --> 00:14:49,591
[devices beeping]
364
00:14:49,675 --> 00:14:50,800
Point two-three.
365
00:14:50,883 --> 00:14:52,174
Nice.
366
00:14:53,174 --> 00:14:54,925
Point two-seven.
367
00:14:55,008 --> 00:14:56,508
Whoa.
368
00:14:56,591 --> 00:14:57,883
All in a day's work.
369
00:14:57,967 --> 00:14:59,758
Whoo.
[laughs] Great job.
370
00:14:59,842 --> 00:15:01,341
Okay, now, over here,
371
00:15:01,424 --> 00:15:02,591
you're gonna need
to drink two ounces
372
00:15:02,675 --> 00:15:05,466
of Hobo Loco
in less than 15 seconds,
373
00:15:05,550 --> 00:15:07,133
and please,
no throwing up on me.
374
00:15:07,216 --> 00:15:09,550
Please use the trash can
over here.
375
00:15:09,633 --> 00:15:13,466
Okay, and...
376
00:15:13,550 --> 00:15:14,716
[timer clicks]
377
00:15:14,800 --> 00:15:16,800
OMG.
That was amazing.
378
00:15:16,883 --> 00:15:17,800
It's like drinking water.
379
00:15:17,883 --> 00:15:19,591
More like watered-down water.
380
00:15:19,675 --> 00:15:22,133
[laughs] Well,
have a Hobo Loco hat.
381
00:15:22,216 --> 00:15:23,466
Agency will be announcing
the contestants
382
00:15:23,550 --> 00:15:24,466
in just a bit.
383
00:15:24,550 --> 00:15:25,591
All right, next.
384
00:15:25,675 --> 00:15:27,341
[clicks tongue]
385
00:15:27,424 --> 00:15:29,341
Good luck, J-holes.
[laughs]
386
00:15:29,424 --> 00:15:30,675
You hear that, douchebags?
387
00:15:30,758 --> 00:15:31,800
[laughs]
388
00:15:31,883 --> 00:15:33,174
♪♪♪
389
00:15:33,258 --> 00:15:35,050
This is the dining area.
390
00:15:35,133 --> 00:15:36,800
I was really impressed
with your résumé.
391
00:15:36,883 --> 00:15:39,216
- Really?
- Kitchen.
392
00:15:39,299 --> 00:15:41,258
Yeah.
393
00:15:41,341 --> 00:15:42,758
Military man, hmm?
394
00:15:42,842 --> 00:15:44,341
Mmm-mmm.
395
00:15:44,424 --> 00:15:45,675
Um, okay.
396
00:15:45,758 --> 00:15:47,883
And this is
the employee lounge.
397
00:15:47,967 --> 00:15:51,092
Your uniform:
right in here.
398
00:15:51,174 --> 00:15:53,258
Let me know if you need
any help putting it on.
399
00:15:53,341 --> 00:15:54,341
Yeah.
400
00:15:54,424 --> 00:15:55,424
Hey, so what's the job?
401
00:15:55,508 --> 00:15:57,383
Busboy, uh, dishwasher?
402
00:15:57,466 --> 00:15:58,967
Street corner
sign spinner.
403
00:15:59,050 --> 00:16:03,633
♪ hip-hop music ♪
404
00:16:03,716 --> 00:16:06,466
♪ We lookin' fresh when
we steppin' in the VIP ♪
405
00:16:06,550 --> 00:16:09,550
- ♪ Look at us, look at us ♪
- ♪ Everybody gonna notice we ♪
406
00:16:09,633 --> 00:16:12,008
♪ Dressed so fly
like an F-16 ♪
407
00:16:12,092 --> 00:16:15,258
♪ They stare with they mouth
wide open, uh ♪
408
00:16:15,341 --> 00:16:17,883
♪ Close your mouth
and let me buy your drinks ♪
409
00:16:17,967 --> 00:16:20,299
♪ While I kick it
with this chick in pink ♪
410
00:16:20,383 --> 00:16:22,842
♪ She compliment me
on my cufflinks ♪
411
00:16:22,925 --> 00:16:25,299
♪ I compliment her
on some other things ♪
412
00:16:25,383 --> 00:16:28,633
♪ Okay, where all my fresh,
fly people on the East Side? ♪
413
00:16:28,716 --> 00:16:31,216
♪ Where all my fresh, fly
people on the West Side? ♪
414
00:16:31,299 --> 00:16:33,633
♪ Where all my fresh, fly
people on the South Side? ♪
415
00:16:33,716 --> 00:16:36,466
♪ North Side, any side? ♪
416
00:16:36,550 --> 00:16:38,842
♪ I'm so fly, yo,
they call me Aviator ♪
417
00:16:38,925 --> 00:16:41,466
♪ Plush with the finish
on my swag out the hangar ♪
418
00:16:41,550 --> 00:16:44,258
♪ Known for the hot 16s
and the bangers ♪
419
00:16:44,341 --> 00:16:45,883
♪ Think I'm 'bout to take
that three-piece ♪
420
00:16:45,967 --> 00:16:46,591
♪ Off the hanger... ♪
421
00:16:46,675 --> 00:16:48,508
Hey, Franny.
422
00:16:48,591 --> 00:16:50,092
What is that?
423
00:16:50,174 --> 00:16:53,341
Careful.
Here.
424
00:16:53,424 --> 00:16:55,633
- [Debbie straining]
- Hey.
425
00:16:55,716 --> 00:16:57,550
[retches]
426
00:16:57,633 --> 00:16:58,925
♪♪♪
427
00:16:59,008 --> 00:17:00,174
What's going on in here?
428
00:17:00,258 --> 00:17:02,925
[retches]
Morning sickness.
429
00:17:03,008 --> 00:17:04,466
[Debbie]
Snaking the tub.
430
00:17:04,550 --> 00:17:06,050
[grunts] I got it.
431
00:17:07,174 --> 00:17:08,800
That's disgusting!
432
00:17:08,883 --> 00:17:10,092
[retches]
433
00:17:10,174 --> 00:17:11,800
- Damn.
- [Ingrid] Oh.
434
00:17:11,883 --> 00:17:13,508
I should add "plumber"
to my welding résumé.
435
00:17:13,591 --> 00:17:15,424
All right, may I take
a shower, please?
436
00:17:15,508 --> 00:17:17,591
Yeah.
437
00:17:17,675 --> 00:17:20,633
Hey, do you ever do those things
in the saver special?
438
00:17:20,716 --> 00:17:23,008
Check for carbon monoxide leaks
or clean the dryer vent?
439
00:17:23,092 --> 00:17:25,424
[scoffs] No.
Too busy, you know,
440
00:17:25,508 --> 00:17:28,174
raising five kids and Frank.
441
00:17:28,258 --> 00:17:29,883
Well, make it quick
in there.
442
00:17:29,967 --> 00:17:31,133
Make sure you clean up
your hair in the drain after.
443
00:17:31,216 --> 00:17:32,466
Yeah, all right.
444
00:17:32,550 --> 00:17:35,800
♪ rock music ♪
445
00:17:35,883 --> 00:17:37,967
Debs.
446
00:17:38,050 --> 00:17:40,050
Sorry I snapped at you.
447
00:17:40,133 --> 00:17:41,508
You're doing a good job.
448
00:17:41,591 --> 00:17:43,174
Thanks.
449
00:17:43,258 --> 00:17:44,341
Also, I'm working
the lunch shift later,
450
00:17:44,424 --> 00:17:45,967
so I'll have money
for you today.
451
00:17:46,050 --> 00:17:47,258
Good.
452
00:17:47,341 --> 00:17:52,258
♪♪♪
453
00:17:52,341 --> 00:17:55,550
Really helps
my morning sickness.
454
00:17:55,633 --> 00:18:00,508
♪♪♪
455
00:18:02,883 --> 00:18:04,758
[Ingrid groans]
456
00:18:07,341 --> 00:18:10,508
So should we, like,
hold hands or something?
457
00:18:10,591 --> 00:18:13,050
I don't know.
Your hands get all sweaty?
458
00:18:13,174 --> 00:18:15,758
They will now
that you asked me like that.
459
00:18:15,842 --> 00:18:17,383
Are you a top
or bottom?
460
00:18:17,466 --> 00:18:18,842
- Bottom.
- Ah, see, me too.
461
00:18:18,925 --> 00:18:20,341
This will never work.
462
00:18:20,424 --> 00:18:22,050
It's all right.
We're here anyway.
463
00:18:23,591 --> 00:18:24,800
A nursing home?
464
00:18:24,883 --> 00:18:26,883
Yeah.
I volunteer here once a month.
465
00:18:26,967 --> 00:18:28,591
Come on,
you can help me.
466
00:18:28,675 --> 00:18:30,424
Shit.
467
00:18:30,508 --> 00:18:32,633
Hey, are we gonna
be cleaning bedpans or...
468
00:18:34,092 --> 00:18:35,758
What up, bitches?
469
00:18:35,842 --> 00:18:38,299
Tami, Audrey got
denture cream in my hair.
470
00:18:38,383 --> 00:18:39,716
Aww, let me see that.
471
00:18:39,800 --> 00:18:41,174
I did not do that.
472
00:18:41,258 --> 00:18:43,216
Tomorrow you'll say
you did do it.
473
00:18:43,299 --> 00:18:45,216
Make up
your Alzheimer's-y mind.
474
00:18:45,299 --> 00:18:47,633
All right, ladies.
Who's at the bowls first?
475
00:18:47,716 --> 00:18:50,341
I've got an assistant today,
so we can do two at a time.
476
00:18:50,424 --> 00:18:52,341
- Me.
- Me too.
477
00:18:52,424 --> 00:18:53,883
- What are we doing?
- Washing their hair.
478
00:18:53,967 --> 00:18:55,216
We're washing their hair?
479
00:18:55,299 --> 00:18:56,758
Yeah. Watch out for that one.
480
00:18:56,842 --> 00:18:57,925
She's handsy,
likes to grab a dick.
481
00:18:58,008 --> 00:19:00,633
Hey.
You all set?
482
00:19:00,716 --> 00:19:01,800
Oh.
483
00:19:01,883 --> 00:19:04,842
♪ upbeat music ♪
484
00:19:04,925 --> 00:19:06,633
♪♪♪
485
00:19:06,716 --> 00:19:07,967
♪ Whoo ♪
486
00:19:08,050 --> 00:19:10,466
♪ I died when I was born ♪
487
00:19:10,550 --> 00:19:13,133
♪ I'm living
through this nuclear age ♪
488
00:19:13,216 --> 00:19:14,716
♪ This money's
running dry... ♪
489
00:19:14,800 --> 00:19:15,758
Hey.
490
00:19:15,842 --> 00:19:17,008
Hey.
What's up, man?
491
00:19:17,092 --> 00:19:18,424
What are you doing?
492
00:19:18,508 --> 00:19:20,133
Giving Santiago
more of an American look
493
00:19:20,216 --> 00:19:21,508
before we go to The Alibi.
494
00:19:24,675 --> 00:19:27,216
♪ Let's get that paper ♪
495
00:19:27,299 --> 00:19:29,133
♪ You're losing
and I'm winning ♪
496
00:19:29,216 --> 00:19:30,508
♪ But who's keeping score... ♪
497
00:19:38,758 --> 00:19:40,633
♪ Let's get that paper ♪
498
00:19:40,716 --> 00:19:42,299
[Liam]
You're getting his sister too?
499
00:19:42,383 --> 00:19:44,008
Yeah.
Foster people are gonna be
500
00:19:44,092 --> 00:19:45,925
dropping her off
a little bit later.
501
00:19:46,008 --> 00:19:47,883
There you go.
502
00:19:47,967 --> 00:19:49,925
♪♪♪
503
00:19:50,008 --> 00:19:51,383
And the final touch.
504
00:19:51,466 --> 00:19:52,508
♪♪♪
505
00:19:52,591 --> 00:19:54,258
Huh?
506
00:19:54,341 --> 00:19:56,800
Oh.
Okay.
507
00:19:56,883 --> 00:19:58,633
How's he look?
508
00:19:58,716 --> 00:19:59,842
Like a cheesy American.
509
00:19:59,925 --> 00:20:01,675
Nice.
510
00:20:01,758 --> 00:20:03,466
♪♪♪
511
00:20:03,550 --> 00:20:06,591
[strumming softly]
512
00:20:07,466 --> 00:20:09,508
So you got a lady friend
back home?
513
00:20:09,591 --> 00:20:11,341
Mm, sure do.
514
00:20:11,424 --> 00:20:13,383
Jasmine Dawn.
515
00:20:13,466 --> 00:20:15,716
Except she kicked me out
three years ago.
516
00:20:17,424 --> 00:20:19,383
Strapping young man like you?
517
00:20:19,466 --> 00:20:20,925
Yeah, well, I had
too many blackouts
518
00:20:21,008 --> 00:20:23,133
for her to deal with.
519
00:20:23,216 --> 00:20:25,299
But I become the Hobo Loco Man,
though,
520
00:20:25,383 --> 00:20:27,424
she gotta take me back,
right?
521
00:20:27,508 --> 00:20:29,716
As long as she'll settle
for runner-up.
522
00:20:29,800 --> 00:20:31,216
Won't have to.
523
00:20:31,299 --> 00:20:33,508
You got loser
written all over you.
524
00:20:33,591 --> 00:20:36,092
[Ryan] All right,
good afternoon!
525
00:20:36,174 --> 00:20:38,092
- [crowd cheering]
- [Ryan] Yes, welcome.
526
00:20:38,174 --> 00:20:40,508
Thank you for entering
our Hobo Loco Man search--
527
00:20:40,591 --> 00:20:43,133
or Hobo Loco Woman,
528
00:20:43,216 --> 00:20:45,633
of course.
Yes, ladies.
529
00:20:45,716 --> 00:20:47,466
All right, we have reviewed
your applications,
530
00:20:47,550 --> 00:20:49,133
and we're ready to announce
the 20 contestants.
531
00:20:49,216 --> 00:20:51,133
If your name is called,
please come on up
532
00:20:51,216 --> 00:20:52,967
to the Hobo Loco porch.
533
00:20:53,050 --> 00:20:55,216
Bethany Houseman!
534
00:20:55,299 --> 00:20:57,383
- There's Bethany!
- Hey, all right.
535
00:20:57,466 --> 00:20:58,716
Next up, Victor...
536
00:20:58,800 --> 00:21:01,133
"Nag-high."
537
00:21:01,216 --> 00:21:02,842
- Victor! My man.
- Yay!
538
00:21:02,925 --> 00:21:04,174
- All right.
- Next up:
539
00:21:04,258 --> 00:21:05,842
Frank Gallagher!
540
00:21:05,925 --> 00:21:07,675
[Ryan] Whoo! Yes!
Where is he?
541
00:21:07,758 --> 00:21:08,716
- [Dax] Hey, there he is.
- [Ryan] That's Frank.
542
00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:10,258
[Dax] There he is!
543
00:21:10,341 --> 00:21:13,758
All right.
Gloria Sweetland.
544
00:21:13,842 --> 00:21:14,591
[crowd cheering]
545
00:21:14,675 --> 00:21:16,299
Oh, she's got fans.
546
00:21:16,383 --> 00:21:18,133
[Ryan] Uh-oh.
547
00:21:18,216 --> 00:21:21,424
[Dax] Mikey O'Shea!
548
00:21:21,508 --> 00:21:22,675
- Mikey, Mikey, Mikey.
- Yeah.
549
00:21:22,758 --> 00:21:25,092
Yay!
550
00:21:25,174 --> 00:21:26,675
We got a competition now.
551
00:21:26,758 --> 00:21:28,341
- Yeah.
- Hola.
552
00:21:28,424 --> 00:21:31,008
[Dax] Next up,
Mrs. O'Coin.
553
00:21:31,092 --> 00:21:32,967
[Ryan] Right.
There she is.
554
00:21:33,050 --> 00:21:35,383
[crowd cheering]
555
00:21:35,466 --> 00:21:38,174
[music playing softly
over speakers]
556
00:21:38,258 --> 00:21:40,299
Oh, hey.
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
557
00:21:40,383 --> 00:21:42,883
No means no, Audrey,
all right?
558
00:21:42,967 --> 00:21:44,216
There you go.
559
00:21:44,299 --> 00:21:45,925
♪♪♪
560
00:21:46,008 --> 00:21:47,216
So what boring stuff are you
561
00:21:47,299 --> 00:21:49,133
gonna have me do
with you today?
562
00:21:49,216 --> 00:21:52,008
Uh, gotta buy
a new phone charger,
563
00:21:52,092 --> 00:21:53,716
some socks,
564
00:21:53,800 --> 00:21:55,633
then go grocery shopping.
565
00:21:55,716 --> 00:21:56,883
Debs has us on rotation.
566
00:21:56,967 --> 00:21:58,550
It's my turn.
567
00:21:58,633 --> 00:22:00,758
I can help you get
some healthy stuff.
568
00:22:00,842 --> 00:22:03,133
Do you know they actually have
produce aisles
569
00:22:03,216 --> 00:22:04,591
at the grocery store?
570
00:22:04,675 --> 00:22:06,633
Hmm, you don't say.
571
00:22:06,716 --> 00:22:08,466
♪♪♪
572
00:22:08,550 --> 00:22:11,424
[Audrey] This feels so good.
573
00:22:11,508 --> 00:22:12,967
It's been a long time
since a boy's
574
00:22:13,050 --> 00:22:15,174
run his fingers
through my hair.
575
00:22:15,258 --> 00:22:17,424
[Audrey moans]
576
00:22:17,508 --> 00:22:19,424
Hey, uh, how long
you been volunteering here?
577
00:22:19,508 --> 00:22:21,174
[Tami] Uh, since beauty school.
578
00:22:21,258 --> 00:22:23,216
My Grandma Peggy
used to live here.
579
00:22:23,299 --> 00:22:25,050
Hmm?
What'd you say?
580
00:22:25,133 --> 00:22:27,216
I wasn't talking to you,
Broom Hilda.
581
00:22:28,050 --> 00:22:30,174
I was telling Lip
about my Grandma Peggy.
582
00:22:30,258 --> 00:22:32,216
The whore?
583
00:22:32,299 --> 00:22:35,008
She fucked your boyfriend
one time. Get over it.
584
00:22:35,092 --> 00:22:36,842
You know, that shit shouldn't
matter once you're past 75.
585
00:22:36,925 --> 00:22:38,383
I will never forget.
586
00:22:38,466 --> 00:22:39,967
Okay, well, that's good.
You hold on to that.
587
00:22:40,050 --> 00:22:41,341
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
588
00:22:41,424 --> 00:22:45,550
♪♪♪
589
00:22:45,633 --> 00:22:47,925
You're smiling at me
in that way.
590
00:22:48,008 --> 00:22:48,925
♪♪♪
591
00:22:49,008 --> 00:22:50,258
What way?
592
00:22:50,341 --> 00:22:52,341
That you like me.
593
00:22:52,424 --> 00:22:54,133
Well, it's kind of hard not to
when you're
594
00:22:54,216 --> 00:22:55,758
putting rollers
in some lady's hair
595
00:22:55,842 --> 00:22:57,383
on your day off.
596
00:22:58,383 --> 00:22:59,758
- Oh, whoa.
- Audrey, stop.
597
00:22:59,842 --> 00:23:02,133
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
- Leave him alone.
598
00:23:02,216 --> 00:23:03,800
That's my dick.
599
00:23:16,758 --> 00:23:19,424
[upbeat music playing
over speakers]
600
00:23:19,508 --> 00:23:20,716
'Sup, small fry?
601
00:23:20,800 --> 00:23:22,299
Saw the sign in the window.
602
00:23:22,383 --> 00:23:23,967
"Help Wanted."
I need a job.
603
00:23:24,050 --> 00:23:25,216
How old are you?
604
00:23:25,299 --> 00:23:26,216
Twenty-five.
605
00:23:26,299 --> 00:23:27,675
♪♪♪
606
00:23:27,758 --> 00:23:29,466
Yeah, come back
when you're 31.
607
00:23:29,550 --> 00:23:31,133
Okay.
608
00:23:31,216 --> 00:23:34,383
♪♪♪
609
00:23:34,466 --> 00:23:37,092
What do you do with those
squeezed-out lemons?
610
00:23:37,174 --> 00:23:37,883
[Dax] Whoo!
611
00:23:37,967 --> 00:23:40,591
[all cheering]
612
00:23:44,758 --> 00:23:47,466
Okay, congratulations,
hobos.
613
00:23:47,550 --> 00:23:48,633
For the next week,
you'll be sleeping
614
00:23:48,716 --> 00:23:50,842
in this backyard
and be required to drink
615
00:23:50,925 --> 00:23:53,716
16 ounces of Hobo Loco daily.
616
00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:55,883
Each day, you'll be given
timed challenges.
617
00:23:55,967 --> 00:23:57,716
Those of you who fail
to complete the tasks
618
00:23:57,800 --> 00:23:59,591
will be eliminated.
619
00:23:59,675 --> 00:24:02,050
You'll also need
to create brand awareness.
620
00:24:02,133 --> 00:24:05,508
You each get a phone
and two quarts of Hobo Loco.
621
00:24:05,591 --> 00:24:07,424
Take lots
of photos and videos
622
00:24:07,508 --> 00:24:09,675
of folks sampling
your Hobo Loco.
623
00:24:09,758 --> 00:24:11,675
All right, who's ready
for the first challenge?
624
00:24:11,758 --> 00:24:14,008
- [all] Yeah!
- [Ryan] Yay.
625
00:24:14,092 --> 00:24:16,424
In the spirit of a true hobo,
each contestant will forage
626
00:24:16,508 --> 00:24:19,050
for their own bedding
to sleep on tonight.
627
00:24:19,133 --> 00:24:20,591
You will be judged
628
00:24:20,675 --> 00:24:23,550
on creativity
and resourcefulness.
629
00:24:23,633 --> 00:24:26,591
- You have one hour.
- [button beeps]
630
00:24:26,675 --> 00:24:28,758
All right, let's go out there,
start hobo-ing!
631
00:24:28,842 --> 00:24:30,133
- [crowd yelling]
- [Ryan] Okay!
632
00:24:30,216 --> 00:24:31,758
- Frank!
- What are you doing?
633
00:24:31,842 --> 00:24:32,842
- Come on, Frank!
- Get off of me. No!
634
00:24:32,925 --> 00:24:34,716
Wait for me!
635
00:24:34,800 --> 00:24:36,341
[flatly] Argh, matey.
636
00:24:36,424 --> 00:24:38,716
Popcorn shrimp is back.
637
00:24:38,800 --> 00:24:39,758
♪ rock music ♪
638
00:24:39,842 --> 00:24:41,508
Fucking sh--
639
00:24:42,883 --> 00:24:45,174
Aye, aye, matey.
Popcorn shrimp is back.
640
00:24:45,258 --> 00:24:48,133
[man] Hey, butt pirate,
need a soda with your shrimp?
641
00:24:48,216 --> 00:24:49,341
Fuck you, douchebag!
642
00:24:49,424 --> 00:24:50,967
[man laughs]
643
00:24:51,050 --> 00:24:53,466
Fuck.
644
00:24:53,550 --> 00:24:55,466
Aye, aye, matey.
645
00:24:55,550 --> 00:24:58,341
Popcorn shrimp.
Fuck.
646
00:24:59,633 --> 00:25:01,633
When did we plant grass
in here?
647
00:25:01,716 --> 00:25:04,092
- [Veronica] That's mold.
- [Kev] Ah, fuck.
648
00:25:04,174 --> 00:25:06,174
[Tommy] When'd you guys
suddenly get into cleaning?
649
00:25:06,258 --> 00:25:07,883
[Veronica]
Makes Santiago happy.
650
00:25:07,967 --> 00:25:09,675
Yeah, we're doing stuff
he likes.
651
00:25:11,424 --> 00:25:13,133
Hey, uh, Santiago said
652
00:25:13,216 --> 00:25:15,174
your girls are trying
to murder him.
653
00:25:15,258 --> 00:25:16,675
What?
654
00:25:16,758 --> 00:25:18,216
Is that what they were doing
this morning?
655
00:25:18,299 --> 00:25:19,675
Wait, that's what they
were doing this morning?
656
00:25:19,758 --> 00:25:21,216
He called them
las diablas--
657
00:25:21,299 --> 00:25:23,174
the devils.
658
00:25:23,258 --> 00:25:24,258
But he's okay with it,
because he doesn't want you
659
00:25:24,341 --> 00:25:25,591
to send him back.
660
00:25:25,675 --> 00:25:27,383
We're not gonna
send him back.
661
00:25:27,466 --> 00:25:28,675
Why would the girls
want to murder him?
662
00:25:28,758 --> 00:25:30,341
They're not trying
to murder anyone.
663
00:25:30,424 --> 00:25:32,174
- They're just playing.
- Maybe they're jealous--
664
00:25:32,258 --> 00:25:33,842
sibling rivalry.
665
00:25:33,925 --> 00:25:35,466
[Tommy] Maybe they're
just not into having
666
00:25:35,550 --> 00:25:36,716
some random brown dude
who doesn't speak English
667
00:25:36,800 --> 00:25:37,800
living in their house.
668
00:25:37,883 --> 00:25:38,758
They're brown too.
669
00:25:38,842 --> 00:25:40,133
Different shade of brown.
670
00:25:40,216 --> 00:25:42,050
Oh, that's crazy.
671
00:25:42,133 --> 00:25:43,925
Just as crazy as white people,
who are actually pink,
672
00:25:44,008 --> 00:25:45,675
thinking all black people
are the same color.
673
00:25:45,758 --> 00:25:47,174
Well, what about
brownish white people,
674
00:25:47,258 --> 00:25:49,133
like some Italians
675
00:25:49,216 --> 00:25:51,174
or Portuguese or Spanish?
676
00:25:51,258 --> 00:25:52,842
They can be
as brown as Santiago.
677
00:25:52,925 --> 00:25:54,716
They're European brown.
678
00:25:54,800 --> 00:25:56,216
All right, I'm lost.
What are you talking about?
679
00:25:56,299 --> 00:25:57,716
Okay, it's real simple.
Your girls
680
00:25:57,800 --> 00:25:59,550
are a different brown
than Santiago,
681
00:25:59,633 --> 00:26:00,842
so they want
his different brown
682
00:26:00,925 --> 00:26:02,216
to go home where he belongs
683
00:26:02,299 --> 00:26:03,675
and leave their brown to get
684
00:26:03,758 --> 00:26:05,424
all the good stuff
from America.
685
00:26:05,508 --> 00:26:06,675
Are you saying our girls
are racist?
686
00:26:06,758 --> 00:26:08,174
He's saying Amy and Gemma
687
00:26:08,258 --> 00:26:10,258
don't understand
what's going on.
688
00:26:10,341 --> 00:26:11,675
What if they want
to murder Martina
689
00:26:11,758 --> 00:26:12,967
when she shows up?
690
00:26:13,050 --> 00:26:14,550
No one's murdering anyone.
691
00:26:14,633 --> 00:26:16,633
- [Kermit] Who's Martina?
- Santiago's sister.
692
00:26:16,716 --> 00:26:18,216
If she's the same color brown
as him,
693
00:26:18,299 --> 00:26:19,675
they're gonna want
to murder her.
694
00:26:19,758 --> 00:26:21,424
Oh, shut up, Tommy.
It'd like Kermit said.
695
00:26:21,508 --> 00:26:22,716
They're just jealous.
696
00:26:22,800 --> 00:26:24,216
We're gonna talk to them
after school
697
00:26:24,299 --> 00:26:25,424
and tell them there's plenty
of good stuff in America
698
00:26:25,508 --> 00:26:26,716
for all the brown people
699
00:26:26,800 --> 00:26:27,842
so they don't have
to end up in jail
700
00:26:27,925 --> 00:26:29,591
for murdering
the different brown people
701
00:26:29,675 --> 00:26:30,758
or something like that, right?
702
00:26:35,883 --> 00:26:37,633
Hey, I recognize you.
703
00:26:37,716 --> 00:26:39,424
You're that crazy lady's
ex-husband.
704
00:26:39,508 --> 00:26:42,050
- Yeah. Is she here?
- Gallaghers don't snitch.
705
00:26:42,133 --> 00:26:44,216
I got a phone app
that says she's in there.
706
00:26:44,299 --> 00:26:46,258
Oh, okay.
707
00:26:46,341 --> 00:26:48,216
Make yourself useful
and get the door.
708
00:26:48,299 --> 00:26:50,800
All right.
709
00:26:50,883 --> 00:26:52,883
There you go.
710
00:26:52,967 --> 00:26:55,050
[vacuum whirring]
711
00:26:55,133 --> 00:26:56,591
Cool if I look around?
712
00:26:56,675 --> 00:26:57,925
[Liam] Knock yourself out.
713
00:26:58,008 --> 00:26:59,299
Might be upstairs.
714
00:27:01,508 --> 00:27:02,716
- [Randy] Ingrid?
- You fall?
715
00:27:02,800 --> 00:27:04,216
- [Ingrid] No.
- [Randy] Ingrid!
716
00:27:04,299 --> 00:27:06,092
Just making sure
my embryos stay in.
717
00:27:06,174 --> 00:27:07,341
[Randy] Where are you?
718
00:27:07,424 --> 00:27:08,675
I'm selling lemonade
to make money
719
00:27:08,758 --> 00:27:10,299
so I can sleep indoors again.
720
00:27:10,383 --> 00:27:11,758
[Randy] Ingrid?
721
00:27:11,842 --> 00:27:12,508
[Liam] What the hell
are you doing?
722
00:27:12,591 --> 00:27:14,174
[Debbie] Vacuuming the lint
723
00:27:14,258 --> 00:27:15,675
out of the dryer vents
before they catch on fire.
724
00:27:15,758 --> 00:27:17,258
[Randy] Ingrid, where--
725
00:27:17,341 --> 00:27:18,883
Ingrid.
726
00:27:18,967 --> 00:27:20,967
Ingy.
727
00:27:21,050 --> 00:27:21,967
What are you doing here?
728
00:27:22,050 --> 00:27:23,216
Dr. Kwan called me.
729
00:27:23,299 --> 00:27:24,466
She told me you were pregnant.
730
00:27:24,550 --> 00:27:25,883
That's wonderful.
731
00:27:25,967 --> 00:27:27,842
Wonderful?
732
00:27:27,925 --> 00:27:29,550
You never wanted me
to have children
733
00:27:29,633 --> 00:27:31,258
because of my condition.
734
00:27:31,341 --> 00:27:32,925
[Randy] Well, now
that you are pregnant,
735
00:27:33,008 --> 00:27:34,424
it's a beautiful miracle.
736
00:27:34,508 --> 00:27:35,925
Let's do this together.
737
00:27:36,008 --> 00:27:37,133
What?
738
00:27:37,216 --> 00:27:38,800
They're not even yours.
739
00:27:38,883 --> 00:27:39,925
They're Frank's.
740
00:27:40,800 --> 00:27:42,925
Yes, but you just met him.
741
00:27:43,008 --> 00:27:44,883
You think he's really committed
to having more kids?
742
00:27:44,967 --> 00:27:47,050
[Ingrid] Yes.
Yes.
743
00:27:47,133 --> 00:27:48,883
But I'm the one who's always
been there for you,
744
00:27:48,967 --> 00:27:50,383
and I always will,
745
00:27:50,466 --> 00:27:52,508
so let's get you
back on your meds
746
00:27:52,591 --> 00:27:55,424
and then we'll go
for a checkup with Dr. Kwan.
747
00:27:55,508 --> 00:27:57,174
You're trying to trick me.
748
00:27:57,258 --> 00:27:59,800
You're gonna get me
on that exam table
749
00:27:59,883 --> 00:28:02,675
and then have Kwan just suck
the embryos out of me!
750
00:28:02,758 --> 00:28:04,883
No, I won't.
I won't, I promise.
751
00:28:04,967 --> 00:28:06,925
We'll keep two.
We'll have twins.
752
00:28:07,008 --> 00:28:08,133
Wouldn't that be great?
Twins?
753
00:28:08,216 --> 00:28:10,383
Bullshit.
754
00:28:10,466 --> 00:28:12,174
You don't want my babies.
755
00:28:12,258 --> 00:28:14,716
Frank does.
Frank loves me.
756
00:28:14,800 --> 00:28:18,341
He loves all six
of my embryos.
757
00:28:18,424 --> 00:28:20,883
I have a phone patient now,
758
00:28:20,967 --> 00:28:23,050
so please go.
759
00:28:24,550 --> 00:28:26,925
Okay, okay.
760
00:28:27,008 --> 00:28:28,050
[sighs]
761
00:28:29,008 --> 00:28:31,341
I'll check back in later.
762
00:28:37,633 --> 00:28:38,758
Hey, Debbie.
763
00:28:41,508 --> 00:28:42,967
Randy's wrong.
764
00:28:43,050 --> 00:28:45,758
Frank'll be committed
to my six babies, right?
765
00:28:45,842 --> 00:28:47,633
[scoffs]
Not a chance.
766
00:28:47,716 --> 00:28:50,591
♪ rock music ♪
767
00:28:50,675 --> 00:28:55,842
♪♪♪
768
00:28:57,424 --> 00:29:00,008
What are you on my ass for?
769
00:29:00,092 --> 00:29:02,008
Find your own bedding.
This is my spot.
770
00:29:02,092 --> 00:29:04,050
I thought we could make a pact.
771
00:29:04,133 --> 00:29:05,758
Either one of us wins,
772
00:29:05,842 --> 00:29:08,383
we split the spokesman money,
50/50.
773
00:29:08,466 --> 00:29:11,591
You trying to hone in
on my dough?
774
00:29:11,675 --> 00:29:14,133
Or am I trying to give you
half of mine, hmm?
775
00:29:14,216 --> 00:29:15,883
[scoffs]
776
00:29:15,967 --> 00:29:18,758
You're a crafty dude,
Mikey O.
777
00:29:20,550 --> 00:29:22,800
I'm a lone wolf.
Go.
778
00:29:24,341 --> 00:29:25,842
Suit yourself.
779
00:29:25,925 --> 00:29:27,508
- Suit yourself.
- Go!
780
00:29:27,591 --> 00:29:29,508
♪ Hey, man, don't you ♪
781
00:29:29,591 --> 00:29:31,258
♪ Don't you know ♪
782
00:29:31,341 --> 00:29:32,591
♪ Your mom don't care ♪
783
00:29:32,675 --> 00:29:34,050
♪ Hey, man... ♪
784
00:29:34,133 --> 00:29:35,424
Jackpot.
785
00:29:35,508 --> 00:29:36,591
♪♪♪
786
00:29:36,675 --> 00:29:39,008
♪ Forget what I said ♪
787
00:29:39,092 --> 00:29:42,050
[horn honking]
788
00:29:42,133 --> 00:29:44,008
[man] Hey, yo! What are you
doing in that truck?
789
00:29:44,092 --> 00:29:46,591
Get out of there!
790
00:29:46,675 --> 00:29:47,842
♪♪♪
791
00:29:47,925 --> 00:29:49,383
- [man] Hey!
- I-I'm, uh...
792
00:29:49,466 --> 00:29:51,092
[man] Get back here!
793
00:29:51,174 --> 00:29:53,216
Where the fuck
do you think you're going?
794
00:29:53,299 --> 00:29:55,925
♪♪♪
795
00:29:56,008 --> 00:29:57,258
[man] That's what you get!
796
00:29:57,341 --> 00:30:00,258
Serves you right, asshole!
797
00:30:00,341 --> 00:30:02,383
Yeah, you better
keep running!
798
00:30:02,466 --> 00:30:03,675
[Frank groans]
799
00:30:07,967 --> 00:30:09,967
So was it weird buying
actual green things
800
00:30:10,050 --> 00:30:11,258
at the grocery store?
801
00:30:11,341 --> 00:30:12,675
Hey, I've bought
green things before.
802
00:30:12,758 --> 00:30:15,299
Guacamole, Mountain Dew,
803
00:30:15,383 --> 00:30:17,216
Jell-O,
804
00:30:17,299 --> 00:30:18,967
mint chocolate chip ice cream.
805
00:30:19,050 --> 00:30:20,716
You gonna list every
crappy green thing?
806
00:30:20,800 --> 00:30:22,424
Yeah, I can go on.
Shamrock shakes.
807
00:30:22,508 --> 00:30:23,925
Green eggs and ham.
808
00:30:27,925 --> 00:30:29,466
Xan?
809
00:30:30,633 --> 00:30:32,591
I didn't know
where else to go.
810
00:30:36,174 --> 00:30:37,424
Aye, matey!
811
00:30:37,508 --> 00:30:38,842
[engine rumbling]
812
00:30:38,925 --> 00:30:41,008
Popcorn shrimp is back.
813
00:30:41,092 --> 00:30:43,008
[music blaring over car stereo]
814
00:30:43,133 --> 00:30:46,133
Oh, my God.
Check this out.
815
00:30:46,216 --> 00:30:47,258
Gallagher?
816
00:30:47,341 --> 00:30:48,508
Shit.
817
00:30:48,591 --> 00:30:49,883
What's up, Little Shins?
818
00:30:50,800 --> 00:30:52,675
What, you out here selling?
819
00:30:52,758 --> 00:30:53,591
Just popcorn shrimp.
820
00:30:53,675 --> 00:30:57,299
♪♪♪
821
00:30:57,383 --> 00:30:58,758
'Cause we took over
this corner.
822
00:30:58,842 --> 00:31:00,424
I don't like no competition.
823
00:31:00,508 --> 00:31:02,842
Hey, you won't have
any from me.
824
00:31:02,925 --> 00:31:04,341
So how do I know
this whole
825
00:31:04,424 --> 00:31:05,967
gay pirate shit
ain't some front?
826
00:31:06,050 --> 00:31:07,591
I've been out of the business
for years.
827
00:31:07,675 --> 00:31:09,133
I'm just working
at Captain Bob's now.
828
00:31:09,216 --> 00:31:11,424
♪♪♪
829
00:31:11,508 --> 00:31:14,883
I got trust issues, man.
What can I say?
830
00:31:14,967 --> 00:31:17,758
I'm gonna have to shake your
Johnny Depp-looking ass down,
831
00:31:17,842 --> 00:31:18,883
make sure
you ain't got no stash.
832
00:31:18,967 --> 00:31:21,299
Yo, I swear to you,
I don't.
833
00:31:21,383 --> 00:31:22,550
Shake him.
834
00:31:22,633 --> 00:31:25,133
Fuck.
They're just shrimp!
835
00:31:25,216 --> 00:31:28,216
♪ Put 'em on the battlefields
where they're dead... ♪
836
00:31:28,299 --> 00:31:29,925
[Carl] Come on, put me down,
motherfucker!
837
00:31:30,008 --> 00:31:31,925
Watch the hat!
838
00:31:41,633 --> 00:31:42,633
So what happened?
839
00:31:42,716 --> 00:31:44,008
Xan, where's your mom?
840
00:31:44,800 --> 00:31:45,925
Don't know.
841
00:31:47,008 --> 00:31:48,008
Here.
842
00:31:48,092 --> 00:31:49,883
I'll make you something to eat.
843
00:31:49,967 --> 00:31:52,466
W-when's the last time
you saw her?
844
00:31:52,550 --> 00:31:54,092
[Xan] She went to get pizza.
845
00:31:54,174 --> 00:31:56,591
I waited in the motel.
846
00:31:56,675 --> 00:31:58,133
Watched TV and stuff.
847
00:31:58,216 --> 00:31:59,258
What, and she never came back?
848
00:32:02,050 --> 00:32:04,925
♪ somber music ♪
849
00:32:05,008 --> 00:32:06,174
♪♪♪
850
00:32:06,258 --> 00:32:07,466
Here you go.
851
00:32:07,550 --> 00:32:10,633
♪♪♪
852
00:32:10,716 --> 00:32:12,174
Motel guy kicked me out.
853
00:32:12,258 --> 00:32:13,675
When did this happen?
854
00:32:13,758 --> 00:32:16,050
Couple days ago.
855
00:32:16,133 --> 00:32:17,967
Where have you been
since then, Xan?
856
00:32:19,258 --> 00:32:21,216
Sometimes my mom works
at this truck stop.
857
00:32:21,299 --> 00:32:22,842
I just hung out there.
858
00:32:22,925 --> 00:32:24,591
A truck stop?
859
00:32:24,675 --> 00:32:27,424
There's a bunch
of guys there, but...
860
00:32:27,508 --> 00:32:28,925
my mom never showed up.
861
00:32:29,008 --> 00:32:30,758
Wait, wait, wait,
a bunch of guys?
862
00:32:30,842 --> 00:32:32,174
W-what does that mean?
They fucking touch you?
863
00:32:32,258 --> 00:32:33,967
- [Tami] Chill out.
- No, I'm not gonna chill
864
00:32:34,050 --> 00:32:35,174
the fuck out.
Her mother ditched her again!
865
00:32:35,258 --> 00:32:38,341
Okay, well,
you are scaring her.
866
00:32:38,424 --> 00:32:39,967
I'll give her a bath.
I'll talk to her.
867
00:32:40,050 --> 00:32:41,800
I'll find out
if anything happened.
868
00:32:41,883 --> 00:32:43,842
Okay?
869
00:32:43,925 --> 00:32:46,216
Okay.
870
00:32:46,299 --> 00:32:50,591
♪♪♪
871
00:32:50,675 --> 00:32:52,591
It's okay.
872
00:32:52,675 --> 00:32:54,341
I'm sorry, Xan.
873
00:32:54,424 --> 00:32:59,216
♪♪♪
874
00:32:59,299 --> 00:33:00,800
[Todd] Lemonade!
875
00:33:00,883 --> 00:33:02,800
Lemonade!
Get your fresh lemonade!
876
00:33:02,883 --> 00:33:05,341
[Liam]
Come get your lemonade.
877
00:33:09,341 --> 00:33:12,008
Let me have one
for each one of my guys.
878
00:33:12,092 --> 00:33:14,174
That'll be five bucks.
879
00:33:15,716 --> 00:33:17,008
Keep the change.
880
00:33:17,092 --> 00:33:18,716
- [horn honks]
- Thanks.
881
00:33:18,800 --> 00:33:21,258
[truck doors close,
engine turns over]
882
00:33:23,133 --> 00:33:26,299
[music playing
over car stereo]
883
00:33:26,383 --> 00:33:28,258
How long are you guys
gonna be out here?
884
00:33:28,341 --> 00:33:29,800
I don't know.
A while.
885
00:33:29,883 --> 00:33:31,633
♪ I love who you are ♪
886
00:33:31,716 --> 00:33:34,008
♪♪♪
887
00:33:34,092 --> 00:33:37,008
♪ I love who you are ♪
888
00:33:37,092 --> 00:33:39,842
♪♪♪
889
00:33:39,925 --> 00:33:41,424
You're blocking my driveway.
890
00:33:41,508 --> 00:33:44,716
♪ Who you are ♪
891
00:33:45,842 --> 00:33:48,550
Lemonade!
Get your fresh lemonade!
892
00:33:52,800 --> 00:33:53,967
[car beeps]
893
00:33:56,550 --> 00:33:58,216
Jesus.
894
00:33:58,299 --> 00:33:59,216
Want some lemonade?
895
00:34:04,383 --> 00:34:07,092
[country music playing
over speakers]
896
00:34:07,174 --> 00:34:08,716
♪♪♪
897
00:34:08,800 --> 00:34:10,133
Just a Sprite.
898
00:34:10,216 --> 00:34:11,967
Last night fucked with me.
899
00:34:12,050 --> 00:34:13,466
Got a whole new attitude.
900
00:34:13,550 --> 00:34:15,341
- Great.
- Ah, perfect.
901
00:34:15,424 --> 00:34:17,842
Uh, Tina,
I got table 41's food for you.
902
00:34:17,925 --> 00:34:19,133
Yeah, okay.
903
00:34:19,216 --> 00:34:22,092
Grilled ham and cheese...
for you,
904
00:34:22,174 --> 00:34:24,050
and the tacos
must be for you.
905
00:34:24,133 --> 00:34:26,967
- Enjoy.
- Yes. Thank you.
906
00:34:27,050 --> 00:34:28,258
- Margo.
- Good afternoon.
907
00:34:28,341 --> 00:34:29,716
What brings you here?
908
00:34:29,800 --> 00:34:31,883
Police got a 911 call
last night
909
00:34:31,967 --> 00:34:34,258
about a possible robbery.
910
00:34:36,174 --> 00:34:37,925
A frantic woman called,
saying that three men
911
00:34:38,008 --> 00:34:39,508
were threatening her,
912
00:34:39,591 --> 00:34:41,758
and she said they left
but she was afraid
913
00:34:41,842 --> 00:34:44,133
they were gonna come back.
914
00:34:44,216 --> 00:34:47,341
And when the police arrived,
the restaurant was closed,
915
00:34:47,424 --> 00:34:51,174
which is interesting,
since we're open 24 hours.
916
00:34:51,258 --> 00:34:52,633
Maybe they had
the wrong address.
917
00:34:52,716 --> 00:34:53,758
Stop.
918
00:34:55,883 --> 00:34:57,174
I don't want your lies,
919
00:34:57,258 --> 00:34:59,008
and you smell like booze.
920
00:34:59,092 --> 00:35:01,258
I don't know
if you're drunk now
921
00:35:01,341 --> 00:35:02,842
or if you just drank
so much last night
922
00:35:02,925 --> 00:35:04,341
that it's just coming
out of your pores.
923
00:35:04,424 --> 00:35:05,758
No, I'm sober.
924
00:35:05,842 --> 00:35:07,174
You're fired.
925
00:35:07,258 --> 00:35:09,716
What?
926
00:35:09,800 --> 00:35:11,591
Well, why?
927
00:35:11,675 --> 00:35:13,800
I-I haven't had a drink
today, I swear.
928
00:35:13,883 --> 00:35:15,216
I've been getting calls
for the past month,
929
00:35:15,299 --> 00:35:18,341
from customers and vendors
and employees,
930
00:35:18,424 --> 00:35:21,341
saying that you had been drunk
on the job
931
00:35:21,424 --> 00:35:24,092
or asleep on the job
or angry on the job.
932
00:35:24,174 --> 00:35:26,133
Please don't fire me.
Please.
933
00:35:26,216 --> 00:35:28,092
I-I've had
a rough couple months,
934
00:35:28,174 --> 00:35:30,424
but-but I've turned a corner.
935
00:35:30,508 --> 00:35:32,258
People who say
they've "turned a corner"--
936
00:35:32,341 --> 00:35:33,967
they haven't turned a corner.
937
00:35:34,050 --> 00:35:36,341
They're just trying
to convince everyone they have.
938
00:35:37,341 --> 00:35:38,967
Please give me
another chance.
939
00:35:39,050 --> 00:35:41,383
I promise I'll straighten out.
940
00:35:41,466 --> 00:35:42,591
Good.
941
00:35:42,675 --> 00:35:43,800
- You should.
- Yes.
942
00:35:43,883 --> 00:35:46,424
But not on my watch.
943
00:35:46,508 --> 00:35:48,216
You're acting manager now,
944
00:35:48,299 --> 00:35:50,883
so you make sure she cleans
her things up and leaves.
945
00:35:50,967 --> 00:35:55,383
♪♪♪
946
00:35:55,466 --> 00:35:57,716
[scoffs]
947
00:35:57,800 --> 00:35:59,508
Fuck all of you.
948
00:36:00,299 --> 00:36:02,341
Ratting me out.
949
00:36:02,424 --> 00:36:04,216
[laughs]
950
00:36:04,299 --> 00:36:07,133
If it weren't for me,
none of you NA motherfuckers
951
00:36:07,216 --> 00:36:09,550
would even have a job.
Mm-hmm.
952
00:36:09,633 --> 00:36:12,050
I wanted to fire you
because you suck,
953
00:36:12,133 --> 00:36:13,424
but you called me, crying
954
00:36:13,508 --> 00:36:15,216
about your mother
and her medical bills,
955
00:36:15,299 --> 00:36:17,299
and I let you
keep your fucking job.
956
00:36:17,383 --> 00:36:18,258
[Eliza] Fiona, I think
we should just--
957
00:36:18,341 --> 00:36:20,174
Shut the fuck up, Eliza.
958
00:36:20,258 --> 00:36:22,383
[laughs]
I'm leaving.
959
00:36:23,591 --> 00:36:25,424
Oh, and guess what.
960
00:36:25,508 --> 00:36:28,550
The cook rubbed his dick
on all of your meals.
961
00:36:28,633 --> 00:36:30,383
Yeah, enjoy.
962
00:36:31,716 --> 00:36:33,216
[silverware clattering]
963
00:36:33,299 --> 00:36:34,842
[man] Can I get the check,
please?
964
00:36:34,925 --> 00:36:36,967
Fuck this, matey.
965
00:36:37,050 --> 00:36:41,174
[upbeat music playing
over speakers]
966
00:36:41,258 --> 00:36:42,842
[Lori] What happened to you?
967
00:36:42,925 --> 00:36:44,716
I got beat up,
shoes thrown at me,
968
00:36:44,800 --> 00:36:46,883
I don't even know how many
milk shakes and beers.
969
00:36:46,967 --> 00:36:49,216
[sighs]
You poor baby.
970
00:36:49,299 --> 00:36:51,716
Come here.
Come here.
971
00:36:54,008 --> 00:36:56,299
Um, yeah, I don't think
it's the best idea
972
00:36:56,383 --> 00:36:58,216
to be spinning signs out there.
973
00:36:58,299 --> 00:37:00,133
Got any other jobs in here?
974
00:37:00,216 --> 00:37:01,800
Are you kidding me?
975
00:37:01,883 --> 00:37:04,216
I got a folder full
of applicants wanting jobs:
976
00:37:04,299 --> 00:37:05,883
people with master's degrees,
977
00:37:05,967 --> 00:37:07,716
anthropologists
and English majors
978
00:37:07,800 --> 00:37:09,675
and useless things like that.
979
00:37:09,758 --> 00:37:11,216
Wow.
Oh, okay.
980
00:37:11,299 --> 00:37:13,466
Besides, you did a great job
out there today.
981
00:37:13,550 --> 00:37:15,800
Sales are up 20%.
982
00:37:15,883 --> 00:37:19,341
I'm ordering more
popcorn shrimp as we speak.
983
00:37:19,424 --> 00:37:21,758
So you'll be back tomorrow,
right?
984
00:37:21,842 --> 00:37:24,299
Uh, yeah.
Sure.
985
00:37:24,383 --> 00:37:25,842
Yeah.
986
00:37:25,925 --> 00:37:26,591
Yeah.
987
00:37:29,800 --> 00:37:32,008
Sweetie pies, why were you
hitting Santiago this morning?
988
00:37:32,092 --> 00:37:33,883
'Cause we don't like him.
989
00:37:33,967 --> 00:37:36,092
Why?
Santiago's a good guy.
990
00:37:36,174 --> 00:37:37,174
He leaves now?
991
00:37:37,258 --> 00:37:39,216
No, baby, he doesn't leave now.
992
00:37:39,299 --> 00:37:40,424
He's staying here with us.
993
00:37:40,508 --> 00:37:42,716
He's our family.
994
00:37:45,758 --> 00:37:47,341
Oh, fuck.
995
00:37:47,424 --> 00:37:49,550
Girls, is this
because Santiago's
996
00:37:49,633 --> 00:37:51,883
a different shade of brown
than you?
997
00:37:51,967 --> 00:37:55,174
Or, girls, is this because
you're jealous of Santiago?
998
00:37:55,258 --> 00:37:56,842
[Veronica]
We need to treat people
999
00:37:56,925 --> 00:37:58,258
how we want
to be treated.
1000
00:37:58,341 --> 00:37:59,758
There are people in this world
1001
00:37:59,842 --> 00:38:02,258
who want to send brown people
like us back to Africa,
1002
00:38:02,341 --> 00:38:04,341
but we won't stand for it,
will we?
1003
00:38:04,424 --> 00:38:06,758
No.
So we also won't stand
1004
00:38:06,842 --> 00:38:08,842
for them wanting to send
other kinds of brown people
1005
00:38:08,925 --> 00:38:10,842
back to Central America.
1006
00:38:10,925 --> 00:38:11,925
Get it?
1007
00:38:13,424 --> 00:38:15,925
Let me try.
Uh, snookums,
1008
00:38:16,008 --> 00:38:18,133
I used to have
sibling rivalry
1009
00:38:18,216 --> 00:38:20,383
with the kids
in my foster homes, okay?
1010
00:38:20,466 --> 00:38:22,800
Especially this one boy,
Joey Caccitore.
1011
00:38:22,883 --> 00:38:24,716
He used to kiss up
to my foster parents
1012
00:38:24,800 --> 00:38:26,508
all the time,
and they would give him
1013
00:38:26,591 --> 00:38:28,299
extra butterscotch pudding,
1014
00:38:28,383 --> 00:38:30,758
and I thought
that they loved him more,
1015
00:38:30,842 --> 00:38:32,133
but in reality,
1016
00:38:32,216 --> 00:38:34,424
they just hated all of us.
1017
00:38:34,508 --> 00:38:36,591
- Kev, how is that helping?
- I don't know.
1018
00:38:36,675 --> 00:38:38,383
I forget that's how
the story ended.
1019
00:38:38,466 --> 00:38:40,174
- [knock at door]
- I'll get it.
1020
00:38:40,258 --> 00:38:41,133
Talk about
the brown people more.
1021
00:38:41,216 --> 00:38:42,716
I think that was helping.
1022
00:38:43,341 --> 00:38:45,758
Just because Santiago's here
doesn't mean we love you less,
1023
00:38:45,842 --> 00:38:47,591
and just because he's different
1024
00:38:47,675 --> 00:38:49,050
doesn't mean that
we're gonna get rid of him.
1025
00:38:49,133 --> 00:38:50,424
- [Kev] V.
- Yeah?
1026
00:38:50,508 --> 00:38:52,508
- [Kev] Look who it is.
- Hi.
1027
00:38:52,591 --> 00:38:53,633
[Santiago] Martina!
1028
00:38:53,716 --> 00:38:54,675
[Martina] Santiago!
1029
00:38:55,675 --> 00:38:57,758
♪ rock music ♪
1030
00:38:57,842 --> 00:38:59,092
[laughs]
1031
00:38:59,174 --> 00:39:04,341
♪♪♪
1032
00:39:08,758 --> 00:39:10,092
[Dax] Only 30 seconds left.
1033
00:39:10,174 --> 00:39:12,258
What the hell was that?
1034
00:39:12,341 --> 00:39:14,258
Smacking me with
a two by four out there?
1035
00:39:14,341 --> 00:39:16,050
That's the way
we're gonna play this thing?
1036
00:39:16,133 --> 00:39:19,008
All's fair in love
and hobo wars, Frank.
1037
00:39:19,092 --> 00:39:20,383
♪♪♪
1038
00:39:20,466 --> 00:39:22,633
Gauntlet thrown, my friend.
1039
00:39:22,716 --> 00:39:26,675
♪♪♪
1040
00:39:26,758 --> 00:39:28,591
[Ryan] Just got off the phone
with the client.
1041
00:39:28,675 --> 00:39:30,466
Four Greek councils
have signed deals
1042
00:39:30,550 --> 00:39:32,299
to make Hobo Loco their
featured alcoholic beverage
1043
00:39:32,383 --> 00:39:33,967
at all
their fraternity parties.
1044
00:39:34,050 --> 00:39:35,883
- We're blowing up.
- Mm-hmm.
1045
00:39:35,967 --> 00:39:37,341
The Insta' Story I just posted
less than an hour ago
1046
00:39:37,424 --> 00:39:38,842
already has 100,000 viewers.
1047
00:39:38,925 --> 00:39:41,967
- [Ryan laughs]
- [buzzer blares]
1048
00:39:42,050 --> 00:39:43,591
Oh, sorry, Victor.
1049
00:39:43,675 --> 00:39:45,258
You've been eliminated.
1050
00:39:45,341 --> 00:39:46,883
And then there were 19.
1051
00:39:46,967 --> 00:39:49,008
Cardboard amateur.
1052
00:39:49,092 --> 00:39:50,050
Bubble wrap.
1053
00:39:50,133 --> 00:39:51,258
Nice touch, Frank.
1054
00:39:51,341 --> 00:39:53,550
♪♪♪
1055
00:39:53,633 --> 00:39:56,675
Ooh, but not as clever
as insulation and tarp!
1056
00:39:56,758 --> 00:39:58,424
- [Ryan] Ha!
- [Dax] You are the winner
1057
00:39:58,508 --> 00:40:00,299
- of this challenge, Mikey O.
- [Ryan] Yeah!
1058
00:40:00,383 --> 00:40:02,633
[Ryan and Dax cheering]
1059
00:40:02,716 --> 00:40:03,716
[Ryan] All right,
let's get out there
1060
00:40:03,800 --> 00:40:05,800
for our next challenge:
1061
00:40:05,883 --> 00:40:08,424
dumpster diving
for your dinner.
1062
00:40:08,508 --> 00:40:10,800
Who thinks they can bring back
the best meal?
1063
00:40:10,883 --> 00:40:12,466
- I can!
- Well, let's see!
1064
00:40:12,550 --> 00:40:14,133
- [button beeps]
- Whoo! Go! Go! Go!
1065
00:40:14,216 --> 00:40:15,842
- Whoo!
- [Dax] One hour! Let's go!
1066
00:40:15,925 --> 00:40:17,967
Don't forget to share
your Hobo Loco
1067
00:40:18,050 --> 00:40:19,925
on social media!
1068
00:40:20,008 --> 00:40:22,216
♪♪♪
1069
00:40:22,299 --> 00:40:23,424
We're gonna make
the American hobo
1070
00:40:23,508 --> 00:40:25,758
as famous as Joe Camel.
1071
00:40:47,092 --> 00:40:49,424
You did good, coming here.
1072
00:40:49,508 --> 00:40:51,758
You know, Lip's a smart guy.
1073
00:40:51,842 --> 00:40:53,758
I like him.
1074
00:40:53,842 --> 00:40:56,508
He'll figure this out.
1075
00:40:56,591 --> 00:40:58,174
Yeah.
1076
00:40:58,258 --> 00:41:00,675
But you can't be hanging out
at truck stops, right?
1077
00:41:00,758 --> 00:41:02,550
It's a lot of creepy people
out there.
1078
00:41:04,258 --> 00:41:06,550
Look, if I saw--
1079
00:41:06,633 --> 00:41:08,883
if I saw a little girl
on the street alone,
1080
00:41:08,967 --> 00:41:11,050
I would want to protect her,
1081
00:41:11,133 --> 00:41:13,591
make sure she was safe,
1082
00:41:13,675 --> 00:41:15,133
but there are
some bad people out there
1083
00:41:15,216 --> 00:41:16,967
who'd want to hurt her,
1084
00:41:17,050 --> 00:41:18,883
maybe say stuff
1085
00:41:18,967 --> 00:41:21,508
or do stuff to her.
1086
00:41:21,591 --> 00:41:23,424
If that ever happened,
1087
00:41:23,508 --> 00:41:24,925
you can tell me about it.
1088
00:41:26,925 --> 00:41:29,466
Hey, I'd listen to anything
you have to say,
1089
00:41:29,550 --> 00:41:31,424
try and make you feel better,
1090
00:41:31,508 --> 00:41:33,675
or maybe even beat the shit
out of that person.
1091
00:41:33,758 --> 00:41:35,008
I don't know.
1092
00:41:38,174 --> 00:41:39,424
Come on.
1093
00:41:39,508 --> 00:41:40,508
Let's go raid Lip's closet
1094
00:41:40,591 --> 00:41:41,758
and find you
something clean to wear.
1095
00:41:41,842 --> 00:41:43,174
♪ rock music ♪
1096
00:41:43,258 --> 00:41:44,800
[Ingrid] No, Sally,
I didn't say
1097
00:41:44,883 --> 00:41:47,216
that you were responsible
for Lou not remembering
1098
00:41:47,299 --> 00:41:49,466
your birthday.
1099
00:41:49,550 --> 00:41:51,424
I said you were responsible
1100
00:41:51,508 --> 00:41:52,716
for the way you reacted
1101
00:41:52,800 --> 00:41:54,716
to Lou not remembering
your birthday.
1102
00:41:54,800 --> 00:41:57,174
Guess who just got
fucking fired!
1103
00:41:57,258 --> 00:41:58,716
[shushing]
1104
00:41:58,800 --> 00:42:00,550
Are you shushing me
in my own house?
1105
00:42:00,633 --> 00:42:02,050
She's doing
a phone therapy session
1106
00:42:02,133 --> 00:42:03,550
with her client Sally.
1107
00:42:03,633 --> 00:42:05,800
[Fiona] Oh.
Hey, Sally.
1108
00:42:05,883 --> 00:42:08,842
Sally, I got all the therapy
you could ever need right here!
1109
00:42:08,925 --> 00:42:10,341
- [Ingrid] Sorry, Sally...
- What happened?
1110
00:42:10,424 --> 00:42:11,800
Why'd you get fired?
1111
00:42:11,883 --> 00:42:13,967
Bullshit this,
bullshit that,
1112
00:42:14,050 --> 00:42:15,800
blah, blah, blah.
1113
00:42:16,675 --> 00:42:18,092
So what's your plan now?
1114
00:42:18,174 --> 00:42:19,716
Gonna hang around here,
drinking all day?
1115
00:42:21,216 --> 00:42:23,800
Oh, no, I-I might
eat something too.
1116
00:42:23,883 --> 00:42:26,008
What about money?
1117
00:42:26,092 --> 00:42:28,550
Could you stop whining about
money for two seconds, maybe?
1118
00:42:28,633 --> 00:42:32,383
♪♪♪
1119
00:42:32,466 --> 00:42:35,591
Brought some popcorn shrimp
back from my shitty-ass job.
1120
00:42:35,675 --> 00:42:37,800
- [Fiona] Yum.
- I'm turning the furnace on.
1121
00:42:37,883 --> 00:42:39,633
Gotta check
for carbon monoxide leaks.
1122
00:42:39,716 --> 00:42:42,216
[sighs]
1123
00:42:42,299 --> 00:42:44,174
You need a job, Fiona.
1124
00:42:44,258 --> 00:42:46,050
Mm-hmm.
1125
00:42:46,133 --> 00:42:51,008
♪♪♪
1126
00:42:55,383 --> 00:42:56,842
[detector beeps]
1127
00:42:57,508 --> 00:42:59,424
What the hell?
1128
00:42:59,508 --> 00:43:04,466
♪♪♪
1129
00:43:04,550 --> 00:43:05,925
[detector beeps]
1130
00:43:07,050 --> 00:43:08,424
[detector beeps]
1131
00:43:09,466 --> 00:43:10,842
[detector beeps]
1132
00:43:12,133 --> 00:43:13,383
[detector beeps]
1133
00:43:14,341 --> 00:43:17,424
[detector beeping]
1134
00:43:17,508 --> 00:43:21,424
♪♪♪
1135
00:43:21,508 --> 00:43:24,675
[detector beeping]
1136
00:43:24,758 --> 00:43:26,591
- [gas hissing]
- No! Shit!
1137
00:43:26,675 --> 00:43:28,383
[detector beeping rapidly]
1138
00:43:28,466 --> 00:43:30,050
Come on.
1139
00:43:30,133 --> 00:43:31,758
[beeping continues]
1140
00:43:31,842 --> 00:43:34,508
- [beeping stops]
- [gas hissing]
1141
00:43:34,591 --> 00:43:36,092
[fabric rips]
1142
00:43:36,174 --> 00:43:37,050
Fuck.
1143
00:43:37,133 --> 00:43:38,424
Help!
1144
00:43:38,508 --> 00:43:39,883
I'm stuck down here!
1145
00:43:39,967 --> 00:43:42,424
[Fiona] I'm coming.
I'm coming.
1146
00:43:42,508 --> 00:43:43,842
[knocking]
1147
00:43:43,925 --> 00:43:45,883
I said I'm coming!
1148
00:43:45,967 --> 00:43:47,299
So, uh, what I'm hearing
you say, Sally,
1149
00:43:47,383 --> 00:43:49,758
is that even though
you're still mad at Lou,
1150
00:43:49,842 --> 00:43:52,216
you are willing to focus
on the good things he does.
1151
00:43:52,299 --> 00:43:54,842
Sally, your therapist
is having a tea party
1152
00:43:54,925 --> 00:43:56,258
- with stuffed animals.
- [knocking]
1153
00:43:56,341 --> 00:43:58,092
Door's open.
1154
00:43:58,174 --> 00:43:59,424
Yeah?
1155
00:43:59,508 --> 00:44:00,883
We're looking for Ingrid.
1156
00:44:00,967 --> 00:44:02,842
I'm her ex-husband.
This is Dr. Kwan--
1157
00:44:02,925 --> 00:44:04,092
Oh, I don't give a fuck
who you are.
1158
00:44:04,174 --> 00:44:05,258
She's right here.
1159
00:44:07,842 --> 00:44:08,967
[Ingrid]
Yeah, you know, Sally,
1160
00:44:09,050 --> 00:44:10,466
we will have
to continue this later
1161
00:44:10,550 --> 00:44:12,299
same time next week.
1162
00:44:15,967 --> 00:44:18,633
I cannot believe
that you betrayed me
1163
00:44:18,716 --> 00:44:20,258
and brought her here.
1164
00:44:20,341 --> 00:44:22,092
[Randy] Ingrid, Dr. Kwan
explained to me
1165
00:44:22,174 --> 00:44:24,092
that you will bleed out
and die
1166
00:44:24,174 --> 00:44:25,925
if you carry six babies
to term.
1167
00:44:26,008 --> 00:44:28,800
Then why did you implant
all those embryos in me?
1168
00:44:28,883 --> 00:44:30,341
Because there was only
a five percent chance
1169
00:44:30,424 --> 00:44:32,299
of any of them
surviving implantation
1170
00:44:32,383 --> 00:44:34,174
in your shriveled-up uterus.
1171
00:44:34,258 --> 00:44:36,383
So what you're saying is,
I'm a medical miracle?
1172
00:44:36,466 --> 00:44:37,967
You'll be a medical tragedy
1173
00:44:38,050 --> 00:44:39,967
if you carry all six
of those fetuses to term.
1174
00:44:40,050 --> 00:44:42,133
I am willing
to take my chances.
1175
00:44:42,216 --> 00:44:43,591
Ingrid, we are gonna go
to Dr. Kwan's office.
1176
00:44:43,675 --> 00:44:45,341
- No.
- She is gonna do
1177
00:44:45,424 --> 00:44:46,258
- the procedure, and then...
- No, no, no, no.
1178
00:44:46,341 --> 00:44:47,508
...I will take you home.
1179
00:44:47,591 --> 00:44:49,133
No!
Get out of my house!
1180
00:44:49,216 --> 00:44:51,383
Bitch, if you don't come
to my office right now,
1181
00:44:51,466 --> 00:44:54,008
I will go North Korean on you
and reach into your vagina
1182
00:44:54,092 --> 00:44:56,341
and rip those embryos
out of you with my bare hands!
1183
00:44:56,424 --> 00:44:58,383
- [both shouting]
- Doctor, please!
1184
00:44:58,466 --> 00:45:00,424
She is trying to kill
my babies!
1185
00:45:00,508 --> 00:45:02,341
[grunts exasperatedly]
1186
00:45:02,424 --> 00:45:04,341
[Randy] Ingrid?
1187
00:45:04,424 --> 00:45:05,508
♪ rock music ♪
1188
00:45:05,591 --> 00:45:07,299
Ingrid?
Oh, crap.
1189
00:45:07,383 --> 00:45:08,466
Ingy.
1190
00:45:08,550 --> 00:45:10,591
[laughing]
1191
00:45:10,675 --> 00:45:13,174
[Randy] Ingrid?
Open this door!
1192
00:45:13,258 --> 00:45:15,092
- Please.
- [Debbie] Hello?
1193
00:45:15,174 --> 00:45:16,675
- Is somebody down here?
- [Randy] Please!
1194
00:45:16,758 --> 00:45:17,883
- [Debbie] I'm trapped!
- [Randy] Ingrid.
1195
00:45:17,967 --> 00:45:20,383
Well, we all feel trapped
at some point.
1196
00:45:20,466 --> 00:45:22,216
Uh, do you want
to talk about it?
1197
00:45:22,299 --> 00:45:25,050
No, you crazy bitch!
It's Debbie!
1198
00:45:25,133 --> 00:45:27,591
I need to get out of here
and turn off the gas
1199
00:45:27,675 --> 00:45:29,008
before the house blows up!
1200
00:45:29,092 --> 00:45:31,341
Debbie?
1201
00:45:31,424 --> 00:45:32,174
Debbie?
1202
00:45:32,258 --> 00:45:33,341
Help!
1203
00:45:33,424 --> 00:45:35,466
Help!
1204
00:45:35,550 --> 00:45:37,133
Somebody help!
1205
00:45:37,216 --> 00:45:38,383
Debbie?
1206
00:45:38,466 --> 00:45:39,341
Kelly?
1207
00:45:39,424 --> 00:45:43,216
♪♪♪
1208
00:45:43,299 --> 00:45:44,466
My pants are stuck.
1209
00:45:44,550 --> 00:45:46,050
[Kelly] Can you take them off?
1210
00:45:46,133 --> 00:45:47,008
What?
1211
00:45:47,092 --> 00:45:49,550
Just take off your pants!
1212
00:45:49,633 --> 00:45:51,591
Oh.
1213
00:45:51,675 --> 00:45:54,383
[gas hissing]
1214
00:45:54,466 --> 00:45:56,008
Uh...
1215
00:45:57,550 --> 00:46:00,466
[grunting]
1216
00:46:00,550 --> 00:46:02,591
[grunts, pants]
1217
00:46:07,133 --> 00:46:08,383
- Oh, my God.
- [laughs]
1218
00:46:08,466 --> 00:46:10,008
[sighs]
1219
00:46:10,092 --> 00:46:12,758
[laughs, sighs]
1220
00:46:12,842 --> 00:46:13,716
♪ energetic rock music ♪
1221
00:46:13,800 --> 00:46:15,383
Nice ass.
1222
00:46:15,466 --> 00:46:17,008
[laughs]
1223
00:46:17,092 --> 00:46:18,383
Let's get that gas
turned off.
1224
00:46:18,466 --> 00:46:20,466
♪ And I got what you need ♪
1225
00:46:20,550 --> 00:46:24,050
♪ Sing hallelujah,
I'll make you believe ♪
1226
00:46:24,133 --> 00:46:27,758
♪ 'Cause you do what I do
and I do me... ♪
1227
00:46:27,842 --> 00:46:30,508
Thank you for dinner,
fancy French restaurant.
1228
00:46:30,591 --> 00:46:32,216
Oh, yeah!
1229
00:46:32,299 --> 00:46:34,550
Any escargots in here?
1230
00:46:35,508 --> 00:46:37,424
♪ Here we go, here we go... ♪
1231
00:46:37,508 --> 00:46:38,591
[Mikey]
Whoa! Hey!
1232
00:46:38,675 --> 00:46:40,800
Come on! Hey!
1233
00:46:40,883 --> 00:46:44,050
All's fair, Mikey O.
All's fair.
1234
00:46:44,133 --> 00:46:45,591
[Mikey] Come on, now!
1235
00:46:45,675 --> 00:46:48,092
Come on!
Aww!
1236
00:46:48,174 --> 00:46:51,092
[smooth music playing
over speakers]
1237
00:46:51,174 --> 00:46:53,758
♪♪♪
1238
00:46:53,842 --> 00:46:55,092
♪ Boredom, boredom,
boredom, boredom ♪
1239
00:46:55,174 --> 00:46:57,050
♪ Boredom, boredom, boredom ♪
1240
00:46:57,133 --> 00:46:59,216
♪ Boy my bedroom floor
is a cereal burial... ♪
1241
00:46:59,299 --> 00:47:01,050
What's going on, fellas?
1242
00:47:01,133 --> 00:47:02,883
Nothing.
Just selling lemonade.
1243
00:47:02,967 --> 00:47:04,842
Neighbor said
there was a disturbance.
1244
00:47:04,925 --> 00:47:06,133
Yeah, Officer, I called.
That was me.
1245
00:47:06,216 --> 00:47:07,550
Seems to be the problem?
1246
00:47:07,633 --> 00:47:09,383
[Clancy]
These kids are up to no good.
1247
00:47:09,466 --> 00:47:10,925
They are making
way too much noise, okay?
1248
00:47:11,008 --> 00:47:12,758
They are getting water
on my car.
1249
00:47:12,842 --> 00:47:14,466
[Todd] Noise?
That's Tyler the Creator.
1250
00:47:14,550 --> 00:47:15,675
They don't belong here, sir.
1251
00:47:15,758 --> 00:47:17,341
We live two streets over.
1252
00:47:17,424 --> 00:47:18,883
Well, I mean,
do you have a-a permit
1253
00:47:18,967 --> 00:47:19,967
to operate a food stand
in front of my house?
1254
00:47:20,050 --> 00:47:21,466
Ask them, sir.
Do they?
1255
00:47:21,550 --> 00:47:23,050
You need a permit
to sell lemonade?
1256
00:47:23,133 --> 00:47:26,716
[indistinct
police radio chatter]
1257
00:47:26,800 --> 00:47:29,174
Eighty-three-ten
will respond.
1258
00:47:29,258 --> 00:47:31,174
Move the lemonade stand
down the street
1259
00:47:31,258 --> 00:47:32,508
and turn down the music.
1260
00:47:32,591 --> 00:47:33,925
Wait, sir, that's it?
1261
00:47:34,008 --> 00:47:35,466
What do you
want me to do, lady?
1262
00:47:35,550 --> 00:47:37,050
Shut them down.
1263
00:47:37,133 --> 00:47:38,716
I just got my car washed.
1264
00:47:38,800 --> 00:47:40,050
[sighs]
1265
00:47:40,842 --> 00:47:42,758
You know what?
1266
00:47:42,842 --> 00:47:44,133
Looks like y'all made
enough money.
1267
00:47:44,216 --> 00:47:45,341
Why don't you close up shop
for the day?
1268
00:47:45,424 --> 00:47:46,883
What?
Why?
1269
00:47:48,216 --> 00:47:49,716
Just do it.
[sighs]
1270
00:47:49,800 --> 00:47:51,883
It's not worth the aggravation.
1271
00:47:51,967 --> 00:47:53,050
Here's 20 bucks.
1272
00:47:54,633 --> 00:47:56,508
Get yourself a permit.
1273
00:47:56,591 --> 00:48:00,341
♪♪♪
1274
00:48:00,424 --> 00:48:02,174
♪ Got some cars I can handle ♪
1275
00:48:02,258 --> 00:48:03,466
♪ But nowhere
for performance... ♪
1276
00:48:03,550 --> 00:48:05,758
Well, you heard the man.
Shut the shit down.
1277
00:48:05,842 --> 00:48:08,008
♪ But I hate eating solo ♪
1278
00:48:08,092 --> 00:48:09,925
♪ Need someone we can
loiter in parking lots ♪
1279
00:48:10,008 --> 00:48:12,466
♪ And sunsets at the border,
yeah ♪
1280
00:48:12,550 --> 00:48:14,967
♪ Ringy-dingy-dong,
I can't be alone ♪
1281
00:48:15,050 --> 00:48:16,299
♪ I been starting to feel-- ♪
1282
00:48:16,383 --> 00:48:17,174
[music stops]
1283
00:48:33,383 --> 00:48:35,424
This is great.
1284
00:48:35,508 --> 00:48:39,050
Big family dinner.
This is exactly what I wanted.
1285
00:48:39,133 --> 00:48:41,299
Are you enjoying
the food, Martina?
1286
00:48:41,383 --> 00:48:43,550
Better than what they had
in the holding cell.
1287
00:48:43,633 --> 00:48:45,050
Oh.
1288
00:48:45,133 --> 00:48:46,716
I am so sorry
they put you there.
1289
00:48:46,800 --> 00:48:49,883
This is not what America's
normally like.
1290
00:48:49,967 --> 00:48:50,925
I thought you were
supposed to be
1291
00:48:51,008 --> 00:48:52,550
the greatest country
in the world.
1292
00:48:53,675 --> 00:48:55,550
You caught us at a bad time.
1293
00:49:04,883 --> 00:49:07,508
Hey, what do you say we, um,
finish up dinner
1294
00:49:07,591 --> 00:49:09,216
and watch some TV?
Hmm?
1295
00:49:09,299 --> 00:49:11,758
You guys have Pawn Stars
in Guatemala?
1296
00:49:15,050 --> 00:49:17,424
Uh, we cannot stay
after dinner.
1297
00:49:17,508 --> 00:49:18,800
We have to go back.
1298
00:49:20,008 --> 00:49:22,341
Back?
To the detention center?
1299
00:49:22,424 --> 00:49:24,092
To Guatemala.
1300
00:49:24,174 --> 00:49:25,842
We go tonight
with our uncle.
1301
00:49:25,925 --> 00:49:27,092
Your uncle?
1302
00:49:27,174 --> 00:49:28,550
Jose Gomez?
1303
00:49:30,133 --> 00:49:32,216
Our father was deported,
so we have to go back
1304
00:49:32,299 --> 00:49:33,424
to be with him.
1305
00:49:33,508 --> 00:49:36,133
Deported?
I'm so sorry.
1306
00:49:36,216 --> 00:49:38,842
[Martina] Sí.
Thank you for
1307
00:49:38,925 --> 00:49:40,800
offering to foster us,
1308
00:49:40,883 --> 00:49:43,258
but your country
no longer wants
1309
00:49:43,341 --> 00:49:46,258
the tired and poor,
yearning to be free,
1310
00:49:46,341 --> 00:49:49,591
like the big green lady
in the New York Harbor says.
1311
00:49:49,675 --> 00:49:50,883
Big green lady?
1312
00:49:50,967 --> 00:49:52,341
Statue of Liberty.
1313
00:50:00,508 --> 00:50:03,050
She's been napping
a long time.
1314
00:50:03,133 --> 00:50:04,925
Probably hasn't slept
in days.
1315
00:50:05,800 --> 00:50:07,591
Yeah, you know,
you can go if you want.
1316
00:50:08,550 --> 00:50:09,842
Are you giving me permission?
1317
00:50:09,925 --> 00:50:10,591
No.
1318
00:50:10,675 --> 00:50:13,092
No, I just mean
1319
00:50:13,174 --> 00:50:15,258
if this is too much
to deal with,
1320
00:50:15,341 --> 00:50:16,424
you know, I understand.
1321
00:50:16,508 --> 00:50:17,550
You really think I do
1322
00:50:17,633 --> 00:50:18,883
anything I don't want to do?
1323
00:50:23,050 --> 00:50:26,174
No, probably not.
1324
00:50:26,258 --> 00:50:27,550
Damn right.
1325
00:50:35,383 --> 00:50:37,050
[visceral squelching,
bludgeoning sounds on TV]
1326
00:50:37,133 --> 00:50:38,842
Got you. Yes.
1327
00:50:40,716 --> 00:50:42,424
Hi.
1328
00:50:42,508 --> 00:50:44,092
Hey, buddy.
What's up?
1329
00:50:44,174 --> 00:50:45,550
Some lady called
the cops on me.
1330
00:50:45,633 --> 00:50:47,466
What'd you do?
1331
00:50:47,550 --> 00:50:49,299
Nothing, just selling lemonade
in front of her house.
1332
00:50:49,383 --> 00:50:52,299
Said we got water
on her fancy car.
1333
00:50:58,299 --> 00:50:59,758
What lady?
1334
00:50:59,842 --> 00:51:01,133
Over on Bundy.
1335
00:51:01,216 --> 00:51:02,550
The one who bought
Mr. Reeback's house
1336
00:51:02,633 --> 00:51:03,508
and redid it?
1337
00:51:03,591 --> 00:51:05,716
Uh-huh.
1338
00:51:05,800 --> 00:51:06,967
Who were you with?
1339
00:51:07,050 --> 00:51:08,050
Some friends from school,
1340
00:51:08,133 --> 00:51:09,550
Todd and De-shawn.
1341
00:51:09,633 --> 00:51:10,925
Black kids?
1342
00:51:11,008 --> 00:51:12,842
Yeah.
1343
00:51:12,925 --> 00:51:14,675
Motherfucker.
1344
00:51:16,967 --> 00:51:18,258
Yo!
1345
00:51:18,341 --> 00:51:22,508
[indistinct chatter]
1346
00:51:24,383 --> 00:51:26,716
We're not gonna eat
this stuff, right?
1347
00:51:26,800 --> 00:51:28,092
Oh, no, hell no.
1348
00:51:28,174 --> 00:51:29,633
We're gonna Fear Factor
this shit.
1349
00:51:29,716 --> 00:51:30,758
[Mikey] I made it!
1350
00:51:30,842 --> 00:51:31,716
- I made it.
- [buzzer blares]
1351
00:51:31,800 --> 00:51:34,258
Shit.
Damn it.
1352
00:51:36,466 --> 00:51:38,758
Can't keep this player
from the game, Frank.
1353
00:51:38,842 --> 00:51:39,842
How did you get out?
1354
00:51:39,925 --> 00:51:41,675
Garbage truck came by.
1355
00:51:41,758 --> 00:51:43,800
Dumped me in the back.
It was rough,
1356
00:51:43,883 --> 00:51:45,800
but a pile of old Big Macs
broke my fall.
1357
00:51:45,883 --> 00:51:47,383
[Ryan] All right, welcome back.
1358
00:51:47,466 --> 00:51:48,925
We'll now go around
and take our pick
1359
00:51:49,008 --> 00:51:52,299
for the dumpster dive
competition.
1360
00:51:53,633 --> 00:51:54,800
Sushi, huh?
1361
00:51:54,883 --> 00:51:56,050
Brave choice.
1362
00:51:57,633 --> 00:52:00,383
♪ rock music ♪
1363
00:52:00,466 --> 00:52:05,299
♪♪♪
1364
00:52:21,341 --> 00:52:22,800
Hey!
1365
00:52:22,883 --> 00:52:25,424
You know that new bitch
over on Bundy?
1366
00:52:25,508 --> 00:52:26,925
Yeah, she pulled
some racist shit
1367
00:52:27,008 --> 00:52:28,299
on my brother Liam,
1368
00:52:28,383 --> 00:52:30,008
so block party.
Come on.
1369
00:52:30,092 --> 00:52:33,633
♪ Hit 'em where it hurts ♪
1370
00:52:33,716 --> 00:52:36,258
♪ Get out now
and leave me in the dirt... ♪
1371
00:52:36,341 --> 00:52:38,299
Hey, Mr. Jackson.
We're throwing
1372
00:52:38,383 --> 00:52:40,424
a new racist neighbor
a welcome party.
1373
00:52:40,508 --> 00:52:41,883
Bring your pit bull.
1374
00:52:41,967 --> 00:52:43,633
[Mr. Jackson]
Come on, boy. Let's go.
1375
00:52:43,716 --> 00:52:45,383
♪ I'm making a comeback ♪
1376
00:52:45,466 --> 00:52:47,842
[crowd cheering]
1377
00:52:47,925 --> 00:52:49,341
♪ You gotta believe that ♪
1378
00:52:49,424 --> 00:52:52,675
♪ I'm making a comeback ♪
1379
00:52:52,758 --> 00:52:55,925
♪♪♪
1380
00:52:56,008 --> 00:52:58,050
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
1381
00:52:58,174 --> 00:52:59,758
Welcome to the South Side,
bitch!
1382
00:52:59,842 --> 00:53:01,883
[crowd cheering]
1383
00:53:01,967 --> 00:53:04,633
♪ I'm making a comeback ♪
1384
00:53:06,758 --> 00:53:09,092
You sure you want
to do this?
1385
00:53:09,174 --> 00:53:11,216
[Martina] Sí.
1386
00:53:25,716 --> 00:53:28,550
speaking Spanish
1387
00:53:48,341 --> 00:53:51,092
I have no idea
what he said.
1388
00:53:51,174 --> 00:53:53,424
It was good.
He smiled.
1389
00:53:56,758 --> 00:53:59,050
There goes my son.
1390
00:54:01,591 --> 00:54:04,508
[hip-hop music playing
over speakers]
1391
00:54:04,591 --> 00:54:06,133
♪♪♪
1392
00:54:06,216 --> 00:54:08,383
I have called the police.
1393
00:54:08,466 --> 00:54:09,925
♪♪♪
1394
00:54:10,008 --> 00:54:12,883
They are on their way.
1395
00:54:12,967 --> 00:54:15,383
You are disturbing the peace.
1396
00:54:15,466 --> 00:54:17,508
Hey, lady.
1397
00:54:17,591 --> 00:54:20,092
That was my brother
with the lemonade stand.
1398
00:54:20,174 --> 00:54:21,842
- What?
- That's right.
1399
00:54:21,925 --> 00:54:23,092
I got a black brother.
1400
00:54:23,174 --> 00:54:25,716
♪♪♪
1401
00:54:25,800 --> 00:54:27,508
What?
That's why you didn't want him
1402
00:54:27,591 --> 00:54:29,258
near your house, right?
1403
00:54:29,341 --> 00:54:31,591
'Cause he's black?
1404
00:54:31,675 --> 00:54:34,299
Okay, you need to go home.
1405
00:54:34,383 --> 00:54:36,341
Some of us have jobs.
1406
00:54:36,424 --> 00:54:37,591
You know, I lived
in this neighborhood
1407
00:54:37,675 --> 00:54:40,258
my whole life.
1408
00:54:40,341 --> 00:54:44,133
Kids have always
sold lemonade right here.
1409
00:54:44,216 --> 00:54:47,092
Black kids, white kids,
1410
00:54:47,174 --> 00:54:49,550
Russian kids, Mexican kids.
1411
00:54:49,633 --> 00:54:52,258
Would you get away
from my fence?
1412
00:54:52,341 --> 00:54:56,967
Nobody ever had a problem
with lemonade stands
1413
00:54:57,050 --> 00:55:00,424
until all of you bougie,
1414
00:55:00,508 --> 00:55:02,424
yoga-loving,
1415
00:55:02,508 --> 00:55:04,591
latte-sipping,
1416
00:55:04,675 --> 00:55:09,466
ankle tattoo-wearing,
racist assholes
1417
00:55:09,550 --> 00:55:11,842
moved into our neighborhood,
so your fence?
1418
00:55:13,050 --> 00:55:14,925
Fuck your fence.
1419
00:55:15,008 --> 00:55:16,758
♪♪♪
1420
00:55:16,842 --> 00:55:19,008
- [blow lands]
- [crowd gasps]
1421
00:55:19,092 --> 00:55:20,925
- [siren blips]
- [growls]
1422
00:55:21,008 --> 00:55:24,925
♪♪♪
1423
00:55:25,008 --> 00:55:27,174
Ah, shit!
1424
00:55:27,258 --> 00:55:28,133
[police officer] Hey!
1425
00:55:28,216 --> 00:55:31,133
♪ rock music ♪
1426
00:55:31,216 --> 00:55:36,341
♪♪♪
1427
00:55:43,633 --> 00:55:46,591
[crowd booing]
1428
00:55:46,675 --> 00:55:49,174
♪ Well, I'm about to explode ♪
1429
00:55:49,258 --> 00:55:51,383
♪ Let it out, let it go ♪
1430
00:55:51,466 --> 00:55:53,591
♪ And if you're down
for the show ♪
1431
00:55:53,675 --> 00:55:56,341
♪ I got something
I've been keeping secret ♪
1432
00:55:56,424 --> 00:55:58,591
♪ Shown never before ♪
1433
00:55:58,675 --> 00:56:00,925
♪ 'Bout to kick in the door ♪
1434
00:56:01,008 --> 00:56:03,008
♪ I know you want it
some more ♪
1435
00:56:03,092 --> 00:56:05,925
♪ But I've got no time left
for tongue in cheek and ♪
1436
00:56:06,008 --> 00:56:08,424
♪ I've got, got, got
to let it out ♪
1437
00:56:08,508 --> 00:56:10,383
♪ Ooh, ooh,
ooh, ooh ♪
1438
00:56:10,466 --> 00:56:12,383
♪ I've got, got, got to ♪
1439
00:56:12,466 --> 00:56:14,842
Video of the food challenge
went viral.
1440
00:56:14,925 --> 00:56:16,842
Over 400,000 views.
1441
00:56:16,925 --> 00:56:20,216
People are doing something
called the "Hobo Dragon."
1442
00:56:22,758 --> 00:56:24,675
[Ryan laughs]
1443
00:56:24,758 --> 00:56:28,466
We are totally getting
promoted after this.
1444
00:56:28,550 --> 00:56:30,466
[paramedic 1] Another
alcohol poisoning inside?
1445
00:56:30,550 --> 00:56:32,258
[paramedic 2]
Yeah, fourth one today.
1446
00:56:32,341 --> 00:56:37,550
♪♪♪
1447
00:56:37,633 --> 00:56:39,716
♪ I've got, got, got
to let it out ♪
1448
00:56:39,800 --> 00:56:42,133
♪ Let it out, let it out,
let it out ♪
1449
00:56:42,216 --> 00:56:44,550
- ♪ Ooh, ooh ♪
- ♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
1450
00:56:44,633 --> 00:56:47,258
- ♪ Ooh, ooh ♪
- ♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
1451
00:56:47,308 --> 00:56:51,858
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