Original subtitles

- Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ¶

¶ Whoa, whoa ¶

- Students, the annual Knight School Battle Royale

is quickly approaching.

- A battle royale! Is that like a dance battle?

Because you all are about to get served.

- No, man, don't do that.

- No, a battle royale is an epic fight fest.

And yeah, don't do that.

- She's correct. No weapons, no squads.

Everyone for themselves, just like all of my family reunions.

- And if you get knocked to the ground, you're out.

I'll be more than happy to show you.

- The ground's right there.

Now we're in their heads! [giggles]

- Previous winners include yours truly, Kraipan's brother Lopan,

and the brave Princess Eliza.

- Yes! You go, Eliza!

I'm just a big fan-- not a relative.

- The battle is slated for next week.

But our enemies don't keep a schedule,

so the competition begins now!

- ALL: [grunting]

- ¶

- [screams] - Take that, unicorns!

- Unicorn? More like uni-can't!

- ¶

- You heard the rules. No squads.

- Sorry, but we're gonna have to kick the Kraken out of you!

- [grunting]

- Surprise attack!

- [grunting]

- If you yell "surprise attack," it's not really a surprise.

- I realize that now.

- [grunts]

- [rumbling] - Prudy quake!

- Sage-nado!

- [grunts]

- ¶

- [grunting]

- Wazzah!

- ¶

- Arc and Ciara are the final two.

- Don't take this butt-kicking personally.

- My butt doesn't take anything personally.

- BOTH: [grunting]

- ¶

- SIR GARETH: Oh, ho, ho! Arc wins!

- [crowd applauds]

- I won? Can I do my dance now?

- Dance like no one's watching, buddy.

- ¶ Yay Arc, you're awesome ¶

¶ Your skills have started to blossom ¶

- Okay, calm down.

You won the battle, not "Astoria's Got Talent."

- [laughs]

Let's check the updated standings.

- ¶

- I'm not the top student anymore.

- Some guy named Arc is.

Wait, that's me.

- Brave Ciara, come to Prudie!

- I can't believe I'm in third place.

I used to rule this school!

- I'm number one...twice!

- That's an 11.

- Great battle royale, students.

Now make room so the school janitor can clean this mess up.

- Slobwick's gonna help. He works here now, too.

- [chatters]

- Oh, congratulations.

I'm not paying you either.

- [moans in disbelief]

- You okay? - Yeah, I'm happy for you.

I just wanted to win this like my sister did.

- It's not your fault I have an edge.

- What does that mean?

- I'm at the school pretending to be a Dragon Blood

because Ryker attacked my village, alright?

I train hard every day so that I can get revenge on him.

- Hey, I wanna take down Ryker, too.

- Yeah, but you have less time to train

because of your princess duties.

- Are you saying being the princess is a weakness?

- No, not a weakness, just... a huge disadvantage.

- That's another word for weakness!

- Not disadvantage!

Just something that's definitely holding you back!

Come back! I promise I'll stop talking!

- ¶ Oh, oh, oh, oh ¶

¶ Oh ¶

- Prudie, what's wrong?

You haven't touched your third plate of hamburgers.

- I'm bummed.

Arc and Ciara are at the top of the leaderboard, and we're--

- Just as good.

- Eh...

- Almost as good?

- Mm...

- The dead weight on the squad?

- If Phoenix Squad is ever going to become knights,

we need to be at the top of the leaderboard, too.

- Look, we will.

And trust me, Prudie, nobody thinks we're the dead weight.

- What's up, dead weight?

- Sage, don't pick on us just because you're in the top three.

- What? No one wants to be third.

It rhymes with turd!

- Also, smurd, which isn't a word.

But I'm working on it.

- Oh, Sir Gareth, if one was upset about one's ranking,

how would they go about raising it?

- Same question, less annoying.

- Well, students can earn hero points

for an extremely heroic act.

- Like offering you ketchup for your fries?

- Oh, do you have ketchup?

- No.

Okay, Prudie, we have to get those hero points.

- Not if we get them first.

- Yeah, this whole hero points thing sounds really smurd!

It's catching on! [giggles]

- [whoosh, tinkling]

- ¶ Oh oh ¶

- Princess?

I know you're mad at me,

so I got you a bag of marshmallows to say I'm sorry.

Then I passed a campfire, so...here's an empty bag.

- You don't need to apologize...

which is good, because that was a horrible apology.

You were just bringing up what I worry about every day.

- You know what I worry about?

Cavities.

I just ate a whole bag of marshmallows.

- I'm worried that being the princess is a weakness.

I miss so much training.

- Come on, you haven't missed that much.

- I missed knife throwing because I had a royal ball.

I also missed dragon riding because I had a royal ball.

I have to go to a lot of royal balls!

- Wow, that's terrible. - I know.

But at least I get shrimp wrapped in bacon.

- No, I was talking about that knight.

- ¶

- That's my sister!

- [pants]

Oh, hey, little sis.

- Eliza, you're really back!

- ¶

- ARC: Do you wanna know a secret?

- I'm a princess whose father won't let her become a knight.

Please let me go to Knight School, Daddy! Please, please!

So I use a magic ring and secretly train as Ciara.

Yes!

- ARC: And I'm Arc, a charming thief,

who has the same dream.

I'm destined to become a knight.

- CIARA: But people from outside the kingdom aren't allowed

in Knight School.

- ARC: So I'm pretending I belong here.

- CIARA: Now, we protect each other's secrets.

- ARC: So we can achieve our dream of becoming knights.

- ¶ We are the Knight Squad ¶

¶ Hey! ¶¶

- ¶

¶ Oh, na, na ¶

¶ Na, na, hey, hey, hey ¶¶

- [weepy] Royal guests!

My daughter Eliza has returned.

- Keep it together, Dad.

- I'm trying! [sniffles]

To celebrate this joyous occasion,

I'm sharing syrup from my chocolate fountain.

- Is this the same chocolate you take your morning bath in?

- Yes.

- If you don't want yours, I'll take it.

- [grunts] Hands off, Wizard.

- Princess Eliza will now say a few words.

Oh, I promised I wouldn't cry, but here come the tears of joy!

- Thank you, Dad.

Most of you were unaware that I was on a secret mission

to find the Armor of Astoria.

- I knew! We're tight like that.

- Since the armor makes whoever wears it invincible,

I wanted to use it to defeat Ryker.

- I knew that part. We're tight like that.

- No, we're not.

Before I could find the armor, I was intercepted by Ryker's army.

Thinking of the good people of Astoria

gave me the strength to fight them off.

- Yeah, she did! 'Cause she's my hero!

- Ryker is destroying every village in his path,

looking for the armor.

It's only a matter of time before he finds it.

- If Ryker finds that armor, he'll be invincible,

and Astoria is doomed.

- Way to bring down the party, Hogancross.

See, this is why I didn't invite you to my barbecue.

- Listen, we can't let our enemies ruin this feast.

So please continue celebrating Eliza's return

and eating my bathtub chocolate.

- [quietly] With all this Ryker stuff,

I hope you've been using that pixie crystal ring I gave you.

- Yeah, I turn into Ciara every chance I get

to train at Knight School. I was top student until--

- Until a handsome young warrior kicked your patootie!

- Arc, what are you doing here?

- Arc? I am Wizard Dumplebaggins.

- This feast is for royals and honored guests only.

- [normal voice] But I have to ask Eliza

where she thinks the invincible armor is.

I need to use it to get revenge on Ryker.

- I'll get rid of him.

Hogancross? - Hmm?

- Come meet Wizard Dummiebaggins.

- I thought I knew every wizard in the kingdom.

- You don't remember me?

We were bunkmates at wizard camp.

- I never went to wizard camp.

Didn't sell enough cookies.

Which means you're lying and about to eat fireballs!

- Would a fake wizard do this?

- [magic whooshs]

- Sorry Arc bugged you about the armor.

It's not like you know where it is.

- Actually... - [gasps]

I knew there was gonna be an "actually"!

- I do know where it is, and I have a map to where it's hidden.

But there's no way I can make it there with my injury.

- Then let's give the map to the knights.

They can get the armor. - Ryker's spies are everywhere.

There's only one person I trust to get it.

- Dad?

He hasn't gone anywhere by himself in 20 years.

- I have to potty. Let's go, people.

- Yeah, I wasn't talking about Dad, obviously.

I was talking about you. - Me?

- Remember how we used to pretend to be legendary knights

when we were kids?

Well, this is your chance to be one for real...

and save our kingdom.

- ¶

- [whoosh, tinkling]

- Students!

Ryker is close to getting the Armor of Astoria.

And with it, he can march through the crystal force field

into the castle.

- How do we defeat the armor?

- The simple answer is...

I haven't a clue.

- We're looking for ideas

from the best and brightest minds in the kingdom.

- [chatters excitedly]

- Slobby has an idea.

- [farts]

- No, just gas. - [giggles]

- Well, that's the second-best idea we've heard today.

Come on, Hogancross, poof me back to my chocolate fountain.

I think better with chocolate between my toes.

- [explosion blasts]

- Now, class, today, instead of training,

you will be brainstorming ideas

on how to defeat the Armor of Astoria.

- Prudie, if we figure out how to defeat the armor,

we'll get all the hero points.

- And then we'll move up on the leaderboard.

- Go, Team Dead Weight!

- Yeah, we should get a better team name.

- Mm.

- Did you hear that?

They're trying to defeat Ryker and take all the hero points.

We have to beat Giant Dork and Magic Dork to it.

- Great idea, Sage! Then we'll be the dorks!

- Everyone's thinking about this all wrong, alright?

We don't have to defeat the armor.

We just have to get to it first.

Did your sister say anything about where it might be?

- She...did not say anything,

and she certainly doesn't have a map!

- Oh my goblin, she has a map!

You know what this means?

I can find the armor and get revenge on Ryker.

- Eliza wants me to get it myself.

But I thought about it, and I'm going to tell her no.

- Why?

- How can I save the kingdom when I missed so much training

being the princess? I don't have what it takes.

- Lucky for you, you have the greatest weapon in the kingdom.

Me.

- Now I'm definitely not going.

- The greatest weapon is tired of you walking away from him!

- [whoosh, tinkling]

- ¶ Oh, oh, na, na, na ¶

- Oh! Sorry, Princess Eliza.

You survived a battle with Ryker,

only to be attacked by charming old me.

- You think you're charming. That's interesting.

- Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!

Look at us, palling around like new friends.

- My sister didn't tell me you were so weird.

Ha, ha, ha, ha!

I'm kidding. She told me.

- Well, she also told me something.

You have a map to the Armor of Astoria.

- You know?

- You're not the only one she tells everything to.

I am basically her other sister.

- Don't tell anybody about that map!

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna pretend I see a friend.

Hey, you! Ha!

- You think that hurts my feelings, and it kinda does!

I'll get over it, 'cause I just pickpocketed your map.

Time to get revenge on Ryker.

- ¶

- ¶ Oh, hey ¶

¶ Oh ¶

¶ Hey ¶¶

- So, are you ready to go get the armor?

- Look, Eliza, this is really hard to tell you,

because you're my hero.

But I think we should send the knights to do this.

- I told you you're the only person I trust.

Why won't you go?

- When you went to Knight School,

you trained full time.

I can't. You know Dad won't let me...

which is why I'm just not good enough.

- Well, I think you are.

And if your hero believes in you,

shouldn't you believe in yourself?

Astoria needs you to step up.

So take this map, which...

which I no longer have. Someone stole it!

- By any chance did you talk to Arc recently?

- Yeah, just a minute ago.

He stole it, didn't he?

- Yeah, that's what he does.

- ¶ Na na na hey ¶ - [whoosh, tinkling]

- So the Armor of Astoria makes whoever wears it invincible

unless we can find a way to damage it.

- I just wish there was a way to convince Ryker to take it off.

- Well, maybe we can...

through the power of the musical theater!

¶ Take that armor off, Mr. Ryker ¶

¶ If you anger this giant ¶

¶ You won't like her ¶

- Okay, you know I love it, but...

something tells me Ryker isn't a song-and-dance man.

- Well, the wizards made the armor with magic.

Maybe it can be defeated by magic, like one of your spells.

- Wait, that's a good idea.

Bookshelf, give me my book of spells!

Hey, this is Buttercup's "Book of Doodles and Happy Things."

Sage and Buttercup stole my spell book!

- They must be trying to sabotage us.

- Then let's go sabotage them!

- And sing about it on the way? - Of course!

¶ My heart is full of rage ¶

- PRUDENCE: ¶ We must get back at Sage ¶

¶ And Buttercup ¶

- ¶

- [whoosh, tinkling]

- Okay, I'll check out this battle axe

and some armor underpants.

- Sorry, Slobby already checked out

the last pair of armor underpants.

- Yah!

- Come on, Slobby, I need those.

- [growls]

- You...keep 'em.

- You can keep your fingers.

- Hey, Arc.

Checking out some weapons?

- Yeah. I-I need a haircut,

so I figured I'd just save some money and do it myself.

- Well, then, go ahead.

- I can't do it!

Okay, I stole the map and I'm going to get the armor.

- You were just planning to go by yourself?

- Yes, alright?

It's better than waiting for Ryker to find it.

People with face tattoos usually get what they want.

- Give me the map.

- [sighs]

Here.

I can't believe you're just gonna give it back to Eliza.

- I'm not.

I'm using it to go get the armor.

- Wait, you said you didn't have what it takes to do this.

- I'm not sure I do. But Astoria needs me to step up.

- And needs me to go with you so I can get the revenge

I so desperately want?

- Fine! - Yes! Thank you.

And I'm sorry about stealing the map.

It'll never happen again.

- You took it from me while we were talking, didn't you?

- Yes, I did.

- ¶ Hey, hey, hey ¶¶

- ¶

- It's freezing up here!

How did you know to dress so warm?

- The map says the armor's

hidden on top of Mount Yougonnafreeze.

- Just go.

Look!

The Armor of Astoria!

- We found it!

- It's trapped in ice.

- CIARA: There's a handprint on it.

- Hey, maybe that's how you get the armor out!

Okay, why don't you touch it while I wear your gloves?

And your scarf and your jacket.

- [zap]

- Whoa, the Armor of Astoria's ours!

- Now we can defeat Ryker!

- You'll have to defeat us first!

- ¶

- Ryker's goons! - Goons?

At least we know not to wear short sleeves on a mountaintop.

- If they get the armor, Ryker will be unstoppable.

- We'll have to fight them.

I'll take Smelly, Tiny, and Fish Face.

- That leaves me Itchy, Twitchy, and Fart Mask.

- [grunting]

- [whoosh, tinkling]

- Okay, all of the most powerful weapons in Astoria

are powered by-- - True love!

- If by true love, you mean battle crystals.

- Sure! [giggles]

- Okay.

[grunts]

So, let's see if this crystal-tipped arrow

is powerful enough to penetrate armor.

- ¶

- [click] - [clank]

- Cross that off the list, and cross the list off the list.

- If it can't penetrate regular armor,

how could it defeat the Armor of Astoria?

We need to find a way to boost the power of these crystals.

- How about we boost the power of...

the--the, uh, the...

Where's my spell book?!

- I don't know. - Oh!

Well, then, we don't know where your weapons are.

[roars]

- I think they're at the bottom of the cliff.

- Why would you do that?

I was going to give your spell book back

after we got the hero points.

I'm Sage! That's what I do!

- Well, give it to me now!

- Oh! Sure. Hmph.

Here you go.

Whoopsie.

- No! - No!

- How are we supposed to defeat the armor without my spells?

- How are we supposed to do it without my crystal weapons?

- Oh, I have a suggestion for how to defeat the armor!

- Please do not say true love.

- I no longer have a suggestion.

- [whoosh, tinkling]

- ALL: [grunting]

- ¶

- ALL: [grunting]

- ¶

- Fight harder, Arc! Astoria needs us!

- I'm trying! But I'm fighting them...

and frostbite!

- We can't let them get the armor!

- They won't! Because I will.

- Eliza, you've come to save us!

- [grunts]

Put down your weapons.

- You heard her, Goon Squad!

- I was talking to you two.

[grunts]

- Eliza, what are you doing?

- Giving the Armor of Astoria to our true ruler.

- Ryker? - That's right.

Eliza's working for me.

- ¶

- Now that I have the armor, Astoria will be mine!

[evil laugh]

- ¶

¶ Hey ¶

¶

¶ Hey ¶

¶

¶ Hey ¶

¶

¶¶

- ¶

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