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1
00:00:02,580 --> 00:00:03,880
Here you go.
2
00:00:03,880 --> 00:00:05,330
Your favorite PJs are ready
3
00:00:05,330 --> 00:00:07,670
for your first
sleepover! What?
4
00:00:07,670 --> 00:00:09,540
I told you I never want
to go on a sleepover.
5
00:00:09,540 --> 00:00:11,540
Which is why I'm telling you
at the last second!
6
00:00:11,540 --> 00:00:13,500
I didn't want to hear you
complain all week.
7
00:00:13,500 --> 00:00:16,040
What if they make me
sleep next to an outlet
8
00:00:16,040 --> 00:00:19,420
and I roll over and my pinky
goes in and I get electrocuted?
9
00:00:19,420 --> 00:00:23,500
Then you're crying, "Why?
Why did I make my baby go?"
10
00:00:23,500 --> 00:00:24,620
You are going.
11
00:00:24,620 --> 00:00:27,960
You are too old to keep
dodging sleepovers.
12
00:00:27,960 --> 00:00:30,080
"She was so little!"
[ Door opens ]
13
00:00:31,750 --> 00:00:33,670
Still reading exams?
Yep,
14
00:00:33,670 --> 00:00:36,040
I have to get through these
50 essays this weekend.
15
00:00:36,040 --> 00:00:38,290
Mm-hmm.
It's exciting to see how students do under pressure.
16
00:00:38,290 --> 00:00:39,960
Some struggle,
but others soar!
17
00:00:39,960 --> 00:00:42,460
That's probably because
you're such a great teacher,
18
00:00:42,460 --> 00:00:44,080
mentor and father.
19
00:00:44,080 --> 00:00:46,000
Whatever it is,
I agree with Mom.
20
00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:47,460
Please, Daddy!
21
00:00:47,460 --> 00:00:49,250
Mama wants me to go
to a sleepover!
22
00:00:49,250 --> 00:00:50,790
Anna-Kat,
that's not true.
23
00:00:50,790 --> 00:00:53,500
I am forcing you
to go to a sleepover.
24
00:00:53,500 --> 00:00:55,250
You know Oliver only
cares about himself,
25
00:00:55,250 --> 00:00:57,460
so if you alienate me,
26
00:00:57,460 --> 00:01:00,750
all you'll be left with is
Taylor to take care of you.
27
00:01:00,750 --> 00:01:02,170
Not smart, Mama.
28
00:01:03,710 --> 00:01:04,960
[ Door opens ]
29
00:01:04,960 --> 00:01:06,420
Hi!
30
00:01:06,420 --> 00:01:08,210
[ Door closes ]
Ugh, trade.
31
00:01:08,210 --> 00:01:09,250
[ Violet cooing ]
32
00:01:09,250 --> 00:01:10,620
Ah, ooh.
33
00:01:10,620 --> 00:01:12,040
Hey, Violet.
34
00:01:12,040 --> 00:01:13,330
Oh.
35
00:01:13,330 --> 00:01:15,330
What happened
to your hair?
36
00:01:15,330 --> 00:01:17,250
I can't afford to
be blonde anymore.
37
00:01:17,250 --> 00:01:19,210
Pretty soon I'll be buying
second-hand clothes
38
00:01:19,210 --> 00:01:21,920
from garage sales
like...this.
39
00:01:21,920 --> 00:01:23,540
Ugh.
I'll have you know
40
00:01:23,540 --> 00:01:25,540
I won this
at Dave & Buster's.
41
00:01:25,540 --> 00:01:27,500
700 tickets.
42
00:01:27,500 --> 00:01:30,920
You know, I love Violet so much,
but being a mom is so hard.
43
00:01:30,920 --> 00:01:32,540
Why didn't anyone warn me?
44
00:01:32,540 --> 00:01:34,670
You can hear me screaming
at my kids from your house
45
00:01:34,670 --> 00:01:37,880
ten times a day.
Isn't that warning enough?
46
00:01:37,880 --> 00:01:40,080
Can I help you
find something?
47
00:01:40,080 --> 00:01:41,290
You know it's just me
over there
48
00:01:41,290 --> 00:01:43,330
in that giant house
all by myself.
49
00:01:43,330 --> 00:01:44,790
I can't afford a nanny,
50
00:01:44,790 --> 00:01:46,170
Pilates is too expensive
51
00:01:46,170 --> 00:01:48,250
so now I'm breastfeeding
to lose weight.
52
00:01:48,250 --> 00:01:50,040
I ballooned up
to a size four.
53
00:01:50,040 --> 00:01:51,420
[ Groans ]
54
00:01:51,420 --> 00:01:53,460
Katie,
your screaming pillow.
55
00:01:53,460 --> 00:01:54,920
Excuse me.
56
00:01:54,920 --> 00:01:56,380
[ Muffled scream ]
57
00:01:58,290 --> 00:02:00,460
See, you have Greg
to help you
58
00:02:00,460 --> 00:02:03,170
with everything,
especially the kids.
59
00:02:03,170 --> 00:02:05,250
[ Baby talk ] Who's got
the sweetest nosey
60
00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:06,580
on your face-face?
61
00:02:06,580 --> 00:02:08,460
You do!
And on the plus side,
62
00:02:08,460 --> 00:02:10,750
his baby talk doubles
as birth control.
63
00:02:10,750 --> 00:02:13,920
[ Rustling ]
64
00:02:13,920 --> 00:02:15,210
Viv, I know you're
a little broke,
65
00:02:15,210 --> 00:02:17,250
but you can't steal groceries
from my house.
66
00:02:17,250 --> 00:02:19,880
[ Chuckles ]
Hilarious, I love it!
67
00:02:19,880 --> 00:02:21,580
[ Groans ]
I don't know, Katie.
68
00:02:21,580 --> 00:02:25,960
I just...feel like I can't do
this alone anymore.
69
00:02:25,960 --> 00:02:28,670
Do you guys think that you could
watch Violet for me tonight?
70
00:02:28,670 --> 00:02:29,960
We'd love to!
71
00:02:29,960 --> 00:02:31,670
Why are we watching
the baby tonight?
72
00:02:31,670 --> 00:02:34,830
I am headed to Mario's
down by the train station
73
00:02:34,830 --> 00:02:37,120
where all the divorced
investment bankers go after work.
74
00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:38,920
I think I can snag one
75
00:02:38,920 --> 00:02:40,790
if I get there before all
the tramps take the good seats.
76
00:02:40,790 --> 00:02:42,960
What are
the good seats? Ooh.
77
00:02:42,960 --> 00:02:45,000
The barstools at the end.
78
00:02:45,000 --> 00:02:46,790
That way I can do this...
79
00:02:46,790 --> 00:02:49,710
[ Laughs loudly ]
80
00:02:49,710 --> 00:02:51,120
...without
hitting anybody.
81
00:02:55,620 --> 00:03:01,620
♪♪
82
00:03:05,790 --> 00:03:07,920
Are those my earrings?
83
00:03:07,920 --> 00:03:09,120
These are so nice!
84
00:03:09,120 --> 00:03:10,880
Can I borrow them?
No.
85
00:03:10,880 --> 00:03:13,620
I wore them to a business dinner
but saved the receipt.
86
00:03:13,620 --> 00:03:15,540
I'm returning them.
No wonder I like them more
87
00:03:15,540 --> 00:03:17,420
than the rest of your trash --
Treasures!
88
00:03:17,420 --> 00:03:18,710
Off now.
89
00:03:18,710 --> 00:03:20,040
They're expensive
90
00:03:20,040 --> 00:03:21,380
and if I don't return them
by tomorrow
91
00:03:21,380 --> 00:03:23,290
then I will be stuck
with a store credit
92
00:03:23,290 --> 00:03:25,380
that expires the day
before I find it
93
00:03:25,380 --> 00:03:27,460
in a drawer with
the extension cords.
94
00:03:30,750 --> 00:03:32,920
[ Cellphone chimes ]
95
00:03:32,920 --> 00:03:34,460
Ugh, news again.
96
00:03:34,460 --> 00:03:36,460
That's it.
I'm deleting this app.
97
00:03:36,460 --> 00:03:37,580
[ Cellphone dings ]
98
00:03:38,960 --> 00:03:40,080
No.
99
00:03:40,080 --> 00:03:41,920
No no no no no no!
100
00:03:41,920 --> 00:03:44,710
Bad dog! Luthor, sit!
101
00:03:44,710 --> 00:03:47,790
Now Luthor, reverse swallow.
102
00:03:47,790 --> 00:03:49,040
Reverse swallow!
103
00:03:50,670 --> 00:03:52,120
Okay, practice run.
104
00:03:52,120 --> 00:03:53,580
When the mom says
to go to sleep,
105
00:03:53,580 --> 00:03:56,250
you take your sleeping bag
and put it next to the bathroom
106
00:03:56,250 --> 00:03:58,620
just in case you want
to wash your hands a few times.
107
00:03:58,620 --> 00:04:00,830
Yeah, Mama, if you
want me to get covered
108
00:04:00,830 --> 00:04:03,040
in sewer water
when a pipe bursts.
109
00:04:03,040 --> 00:04:05,620
That is not gonna --
Mama, I dunno.
110
00:04:05,620 --> 00:04:07,960
This is all happening
so fast, Mama.
111
00:04:07,960 --> 00:04:09,380
You don't have to keep
saying "Mama."
112
00:04:09,380 --> 00:04:10,830
I know who
you're talking to.
113
00:04:10,830 --> 00:04:12,670
If you have any problems,
call us.
114
00:04:12,670 --> 00:04:14,170
No matter how late.
115
00:04:14,170 --> 00:04:15,460
Even if you just
want to talk.
116
00:04:15,460 --> 00:04:16,420
A word, Greg?
117
00:04:17,750 --> 00:04:19,540
[ Sighs ]
118
00:04:19,540 --> 00:04:21,460
As the years go on, coming into
this room alone with you
119
00:04:21,460 --> 00:04:23,500
has become
more scary than sexy.
120
00:04:23,500 --> 00:04:25,670
Why are you coddling her?
121
00:04:25,670 --> 00:04:27,750
She needs a push right now,
not a hug.
122
00:04:27,750 --> 00:04:29,330
She's nervous.
She's our baby --
123
00:04:29,330 --> 00:04:31,210
She is turning 10!
124
00:04:31,210 --> 00:04:35,000
And this is our opportunity
to help her grow up a little.
125
00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:36,420
I need this.
126
00:04:36,420 --> 00:04:38,250
I am getting "Mama"'d
to death in there.
127
00:04:38,250 --> 00:04:40,040
What's your hurry to
make her grow up?
128
00:04:40,040 --> 00:04:41,710
She's our last one.
Exactly.
129
00:04:41,710 --> 00:04:44,000
We're on the verge of
getting our lives back.
130
00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:45,580
Not if we take action.
131
00:04:45,580 --> 00:04:47,000
Let's have another baby.
132
00:04:49,960 --> 00:04:51,620
Can you get
my screaming pillow?
133
00:04:51,620 --> 00:04:53,670
I'm sad our kids
are getting big.
134
00:04:53,670 --> 00:04:55,500
I miss reading them books,
135
00:04:55,500 --> 00:04:57,420
they reach for your hand,
136
00:04:57,420 --> 00:04:59,420
I miss the way
they mispronounce words.
137
00:04:59,420 --> 00:05:00,960
Taylor still does it,
but it's not cute.
138
00:05:00,960 --> 00:05:02,210
It's more worrisome.
Mm-hmm.
139
00:05:02,210 --> 00:05:04,080
Playing with Viv's
baby today
140
00:05:04,080 --> 00:05:05,920
made me want to
start all over again.
141
00:05:05,920 --> 00:05:08,750
Well then I wish you and your
second wife the very best.
142
00:05:08,750 --> 00:05:09,750
[ Knock on door ]
143
00:05:13,080 --> 00:05:14,960
I can't go to
the sleepover, Mama.
144
00:05:14,960 --> 00:05:16,670
I think I'm getting
my period.
145
00:05:16,670 --> 00:05:18,460
No, you're not.
I'm telling you.
146
00:05:18,460 --> 00:05:20,540
I can feel my uterine wall
loosening.
147
00:05:20,540 --> 00:05:22,830
Stop Googling stuff
and go pack your bag!
148
00:05:22,830 --> 00:05:25,000
[ Sighs ]
Ugh.
149
00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:29,880
[ Piano music playing ]
150
00:05:29,880 --> 00:05:31,330
Can I ask you a favor?
151
00:05:31,330 --> 00:05:32,670
I need --
Not my problem.
152
00:05:32,670 --> 00:05:34,080
This is serious.
153
00:05:34,080 --> 00:05:36,380
Then it's seriously
not my problem.
154
00:05:36,380 --> 00:05:38,330
[ Chuckles ]
That's good stuff.
155
00:05:38,330 --> 00:05:40,790
I turned around and Luthor ate
Mom's expensive earrings.
156
00:05:40,790 --> 00:05:41,790
[ Chuckles ]
157
00:05:41,790 --> 00:05:43,380
You're in so much trouble.
158
00:05:43,380 --> 00:05:45,000
I read online it can
take a dog a month
159
00:05:45,000 --> 00:05:46,170
to pass something
like this.
160
00:05:46,170 --> 00:05:47,580
But I need them
by tomorrow.
161
00:05:47,580 --> 00:05:49,670
What do I do?
Oh, I know.
162
00:05:49,670 --> 00:05:51,290
Leave me out of it.
163
00:05:51,290 --> 00:05:52,750
I am on fire.
164
00:05:52,750 --> 00:05:54,420
You're always calling me
the dumb one.
165
00:05:54,420 --> 00:05:56,210
So I'm dumb.
Help me!
166
00:05:56,210 --> 00:05:58,500
All right, all right,
I'll help you.
167
00:05:58,500 --> 00:06:00,920
Don't forget to wear gloves.
168
00:06:00,920 --> 00:06:02,080
Three for three!
169
00:06:02,080 --> 00:06:08,380
♪♪
170
00:06:08,380 --> 00:06:11,120
Viv, did you steal my car keys
so I'd come over?
171
00:06:12,250 --> 00:06:13,080
No.
172
00:06:14,920 --> 00:06:16,290
[ Keys jingle ]
Yes.
173
00:06:16,290 --> 00:06:17,620
[ Groans ]
But, hey,
174
00:06:17,620 --> 00:06:19,380
would you just stay
and talk to me for, like,
175
00:06:19,380 --> 00:06:21,040
ten minutes about
anything adult?
176
00:06:21,040 --> 00:06:22,540
Look, just pick a topic.
177
00:06:22,540 --> 00:06:24,290
[ Gasps ]
Is this my magazine?
178
00:06:24,290 --> 00:06:26,210
Did you take this
from my bathroom?
179
00:06:26,210 --> 00:06:27,750
I left my phone
in the bedroom
180
00:06:27,750 --> 00:06:29,460
and had to read the shampoo
bottle like an animal!
181
00:06:30,830 --> 00:06:32,620
Hi, Viv.
Alan?!
182
00:06:34,000 --> 00:06:35,670
How the hell
did you get in here?
183
00:06:35,670 --> 00:06:38,210
I opened the door
with the light of my soul.
184
00:06:38,210 --> 00:06:40,540
And my key -- I still have
my key, and it works.
185
00:06:40,540 --> 00:06:42,830
This isn't your home anymore,
Alan.
186
00:06:42,830 --> 00:06:45,500
You and Viv are divorced.
She kicked you out a year ago.
187
00:06:45,500 --> 00:06:47,170
I know, and I deserved that.
188
00:06:47,170 --> 00:06:49,880
And in that time,
I've been in an ashram in India.
189
00:06:49,880 --> 00:06:51,290
I've been meditating.
190
00:06:51,290 --> 00:06:53,830
I've been finding myself,
reading other people's auras.
191
00:06:53,830 --> 00:06:55,620
Yours, by the way,
is very cloudy.
192
00:06:55,620 --> 00:06:57,250
That's not good.
193
00:06:57,250 --> 00:06:59,000
You might want to
have that looked at.
194
00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:00,920
What do you want, Alan?
195
00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:03,380
Listen, Viv, I wasn't
the greatest husband.
196
00:07:03,380 --> 00:07:04,580
But I want us
to have a fresh start.
197
00:07:04,580 --> 00:07:08,040
And I realize you are
the most important thing,
198
00:07:08,040 --> 00:07:10,080
and if you take me back
this time,
199
00:07:10,080 --> 00:07:11,750
I will give you everything
you deserve --
200
00:07:11,750 --> 00:07:13,710
champagne, travel...
201
00:07:13,710 --> 00:07:15,250
I will teach you
to levitate.
202
00:07:18,710 --> 00:07:20,580
Did you see that?
It's very subtle.
203
00:07:20,580 --> 00:07:24,120
I really would like to believe
that you've changed.
204
00:07:24,120 --> 00:07:26,580
Let me show you
that I've changed.
205
00:07:26,580 --> 00:07:30,330
If you take me back, I'll make
sure your energy is pure
206
00:07:30,330 --> 00:07:33,460
and your sandals
are Prada. [ Gasps ]
207
00:07:33,460 --> 00:07:37,170
Nice try, Alan, but Viv
doesn't need you anymore.
208
00:07:37,170 --> 00:07:39,960
She is a strong,
independent woman --
209
00:07:39,960 --> 00:07:42,000
Um, actually --
No, Viv.
210
00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:43,830
Um, actually, again.
Viv!
211
00:07:43,830 --> 00:07:46,540
Katie.
You do not need a man to make you happy.
212
00:07:46,540 --> 00:07:49,620
Viv, it's just us this time --
you and me.
213
00:07:49,620 --> 00:07:52,420
A-All my children
are in prep school,
214
00:07:52,420 --> 00:07:54,500
so there'll be no kids
to come between us.
215
00:07:54,500 --> 00:07:55,880
[ Violet crying ]
216
00:07:55,880 --> 00:07:57,290
Whose baby is that?
217
00:07:57,290 --> 00:07:58,960
[ Loudly ] Katie's!
[ Gasps ]
218
00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:00,710
Congratulations, Katie.
219
00:08:00,710 --> 00:08:02,500
"Namaste."
220
00:08:02,500 --> 00:08:04,540
That's a really neat phrase
I learned.
221
00:08:04,540 --> 00:08:06,120
It means "amazeballs."
222
00:08:09,580 --> 00:08:12,460
Everything's gonna be just
like it was only better.
223
00:08:12,460 --> 00:08:14,620
Oh.
I'm getting so healthy right now,
224
00:08:14,620 --> 00:08:17,120
I'm practically peeing
essential oils. Oh.
225
00:08:17,120 --> 00:08:18,540
And you will, too.
226
00:08:18,540 --> 00:08:19,920
I can't wait.
227
00:08:19,920 --> 00:08:22,040
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I'm gonna go fill our toilet
228
00:08:22,040 --> 00:08:23,540
with eucalyptus
and ylang-ylang.
229
00:08:23,540 --> 00:08:24,540
Mmm.
230
00:08:26,500 --> 00:08:28,210
[ Door opens ]
My baby?
231
00:08:28,210 --> 00:08:30,170
I don't know.
It was all I could think of.
232
00:08:30,170 --> 00:08:32,170
[ Violet cooing ]
She's your baby, Viv!
233
00:08:32,170 --> 00:08:34,040
Of course she is!
I'm just --
234
00:08:34,040 --> 00:08:36,920
Giving up your baby for a shot
with your terrible ex-husband?
235
00:08:36,920 --> 00:08:38,620
No, not giving her up,
236
00:08:38,620 --> 00:08:42,170
just buying time to see if Alan
and I can work it out.
237
00:08:42,170 --> 00:08:43,500
He's going to have
to know about her.
238
00:08:43,500 --> 00:08:46,250
She is not a banjo
you can store in my basement.
239
00:08:46,250 --> 00:08:47,670
Did I used to own a banjo?
240
00:08:47,670 --> 00:08:49,920
No, it could be anything.
It's a figure of speech!
241
00:08:49,920 --> 00:08:51,460
Well I don't
understand it. Viv!
242
00:08:51,460 --> 00:08:54,790
Katie, please,
just watch Violet for the night.
243
00:08:54,790 --> 00:08:57,120
Then Alan and I
will be back together,
244
00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:58,960
and I promise
I will come clean.
245
00:08:58,960 --> 00:09:00,380
By then he'll be
so in love with me
246
00:09:00,380 --> 00:09:02,170
he'll have to be
in love with her.
247
00:09:02,170 --> 00:09:04,790
This is a bad idea.
Please?
248
00:09:04,790 --> 00:09:06,580
Being a single mom
is so hard.
249
00:09:06,580 --> 00:09:08,670
And I want
my blond hair back.
250
00:09:08,670 --> 00:09:10,460
Brunettes lead sad,
miserable lives.
251
00:09:10,460 --> 00:09:12,170
You of all people should
understand that.
252
00:09:14,920 --> 00:09:16,750
Hey.
Why'd you want my old --
253
00:09:16,750 --> 00:09:19,120
Oh hell no!
254
00:09:19,120 --> 00:09:21,000
You had another one?!
255
00:09:21,000 --> 00:09:22,710
Do they just drop
out of you without warning?
256
00:09:22,710 --> 00:09:24,620
It is Viv's baby.
257
00:09:24,620 --> 00:09:26,920
I did not have time to
grab a stroller from her.
258
00:09:26,920 --> 00:09:29,330
[ Violet coos ]
Why would you want to babysit Viv's baby?
259
00:09:29,330 --> 00:09:31,040
Alan is back
260
00:09:31,040 --> 00:09:33,080
so I'm stuck taking care
of little Viv here
261
00:09:33,080 --> 00:09:35,790
until she can get up the guts
to tell Alan she had a baby.
262
00:09:35,790 --> 00:09:38,040
Since when do you do such
nice things for people?
263
00:09:38,040 --> 00:09:39,250
I don't know.
264
00:09:39,250 --> 00:09:41,670
I'm losing what
makes me special.
265
00:09:41,670 --> 00:09:43,960
The worst part is having this
little angel at our house
266
00:09:43,960 --> 00:09:45,380
is making Greg baby crazy.
267
00:09:45,380 --> 00:09:47,880
And I do not want
another baby.
268
00:09:47,880 --> 00:09:49,500
Sometimes the best cure
for wanting a baby
269
00:09:49,500 --> 00:09:50,920
is spending time
with a baby.
270
00:09:50,920 --> 00:09:52,330
Yeah, it's true.
271
00:09:52,330 --> 00:09:54,330
Make Greg watch the baby
all night.
272
00:09:54,330 --> 00:09:56,040
See how he
likes it then. Mm-hmm.
273
00:09:56,040 --> 00:09:57,960
I always say, if you want to
talk someone out of marriage,
274
00:09:57,960 --> 00:10:00,000
just hang out
with my ex-wife.
275
00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:02,670
What does that have
to do with the baby? I don't know,
276
00:10:02,670 --> 00:10:04,000
I just feel like we don't
talk about me enough.
277
00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:05,580
[ Chuckles ]
278
00:10:05,580 --> 00:10:07,750
[ Thudding ]
279
00:10:10,920 --> 00:10:13,790
Ready for your sleepover?
280
00:10:13,790 --> 00:10:15,710
It was nice
knowing you, boy.
281
00:10:15,710 --> 00:10:19,290
You with your shorter life span,
and here I am going first.
282
00:10:19,290 --> 00:10:21,210
You will be home
tomorrow morning.
283
00:10:21,210 --> 00:10:22,580
Get in the car.
284
00:10:29,710 --> 00:10:30,670
[ Door closes ]
285
00:10:30,670 --> 00:10:33,210
[ Violet cooing ]
286
00:10:35,790 --> 00:10:37,080
Here you go, Professor.
287
00:10:37,080 --> 00:10:38,500
Katie, I'm working.
288
00:10:38,500 --> 00:10:40,170
Not anymore.
289
00:10:40,170 --> 00:10:42,880
Oh, is having a baby
sometimes inconvenient?
290
00:10:42,880 --> 00:10:44,380
Good thing
she's not a toddler,
291
00:10:44,380 --> 00:10:46,210
because toddlers
do stuff like this.
292
00:10:49,710 --> 00:10:56,000
♪♪
293
00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:57,250
[ Violet cries ]
294
00:10:58,790 --> 00:11:01,210
[ Cellphone clicking ]
295
00:11:01,210 --> 00:11:02,790
You know how
you said the dog
296
00:11:02,790 --> 00:11:04,920
eating Mom's earrings
wasn't your problem?
297
00:11:04,920 --> 00:11:06,170
Yeah, that was great.
298
00:11:06,170 --> 00:11:07,920
And remember those
gold cufflinks
299
00:11:07,920 --> 00:11:09,080
that you got from Spencer?
300
00:11:09,080 --> 00:11:10,500
[ Chuckles ]
You mean the ones that he stole
301
00:11:10,500 --> 00:11:12,580
off Malcolm Forbes' corpse
at his funeral?
302
00:11:12,580 --> 00:11:14,290
[ Chuckles ] Right, those.
303
00:11:14,290 --> 00:11:15,750
Well, now we have
the same problem
304
00:11:15,750 --> 00:11:17,080
because Luthor ate them.
305
00:11:20,880 --> 00:11:22,380
How'd Luthor get them?!
306
00:11:22,380 --> 00:11:24,040
Well, they somehow
fell into a treat.
307
00:11:24,040 --> 00:11:26,250
That I fed him.
And then I laughed.
308
00:11:26,250 --> 00:11:28,040
Now grab some gloves
and join the party.
309
00:11:28,040 --> 00:11:29,120
[ Chuckles ]
310
00:11:33,120 --> 00:11:34,620
Hey.
Hey.
311
00:11:34,620 --> 00:11:36,250
I am back from dropping
Anna-Kat off.
312
00:11:37,920 --> 00:11:39,290
Where is Violet?
313
00:11:39,290 --> 00:11:42,380
She's napping in my office
like an angel.
314
00:11:42,380 --> 00:11:43,540
Is she?
Yeah.
315
00:11:43,540 --> 00:11:45,170
Hmm.
316
00:11:52,830 --> 00:11:54,420
[ Coins clang ]
317
00:11:54,420 --> 00:11:56,540
Why are you putting
loose change in the blender?
318
00:11:56,540 --> 00:11:58,500
You need to sharpen the blades
every six months.
319
00:11:58,500 --> 00:12:00,380
You are not staying
on top of it.
320
00:12:00,380 --> 00:12:01,500
I don't think tha--
321
00:12:01,500 --> 00:12:03,250
[ Blender whirring,
coins clanging ]
322
00:12:03,250 --> 00:12:05,000
You'll wake the baby!
323
00:12:05,000 --> 00:12:06,500
Oh, is she sleeping?!
324
00:12:06,500 --> 00:12:08,080
I forgot she was even here!
325
00:12:08,080 --> 00:12:10,000
We were just
talking about her!
326
00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:14,460
[ Whirring, clanging continue ]
327
00:12:14,460 --> 00:12:16,080
[ Blender shuts off ]
328
00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:20,580
Why isn't she crying?
329
00:12:20,580 --> 00:12:22,750
She's so calm.
I forgot how good babies can be.
330
00:12:22,750 --> 00:12:23,920
Oh.
331
00:12:23,920 --> 00:12:26,750
Such a good baby!
332
00:12:26,750 --> 00:12:29,040
Katie: Let's see how good
you are when I do this.
333
00:12:29,040 --> 00:12:29,920
[ Pacifier pops ]
334
00:12:31,500 --> 00:12:32,620
[ Giggles ]
335
00:12:34,120 --> 00:12:35,880
[ Coos ]
336
00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:37,460
I better clean
this pacifier.
337
00:12:37,460 --> 00:12:38,750
Newborns are the best.
338
00:12:38,750 --> 00:12:40,460
[ Dramatic music plays ]
339
00:12:40,460 --> 00:12:43,170
You've made
a powerful enemy, baby.
340
00:12:43,170 --> 00:12:46,290
[ Cellphone rings ]
341
00:12:46,290 --> 00:12:47,620
[ Cellphone clicks ]
342
00:12:47,620 --> 00:12:49,460
Anna-Kat, are you okay?
343
00:12:49,460 --> 00:12:50,750
You were so right.
344
00:12:50,750 --> 00:12:53,460
The sleepover is fun.
See?
345
00:12:53,460 --> 00:12:55,500
But we're having
a stuffed animal tea party
346
00:12:55,500 --> 00:12:57,620
and I didn't bring one.
347
00:12:57,620 --> 00:13:00,290
I'm going to be stuck using
an oven mitt like an idiot.
348
00:13:00,290 --> 00:13:01,880
Okay, calm down.
I'll be right there.
349
00:13:01,880 --> 00:13:03,420
Bring my stuffed turtle.
350
00:13:03,420 --> 00:13:05,290
The one with the friendly eyes.
351
00:13:05,290 --> 00:13:07,170
Not the one who looks like
he has a terrible secret.
352
00:13:07,170 --> 00:13:08,920
How am I supposed to
figure that out?
353
00:13:08,920 --> 00:13:10,170
You'll know.
354
00:13:10,170 --> 00:13:17,040
♪♪
355
00:13:17,040 --> 00:13:23,960
♪♪
356
00:13:23,960 --> 00:13:25,210
What do you know, turtle?
357
00:13:27,080 --> 00:13:28,670
[ Indistinct talking ]
Mama!
358
00:13:30,620 --> 00:13:32,460
Here's your turtle.
Forget the turtle.
359
00:13:32,460 --> 00:13:33,580
Let's get out of here.
360
00:13:33,580 --> 00:13:35,880
Wait, what about
the tea party?
361
00:13:35,880 --> 00:13:37,540
There was never
any tea party.
362
00:13:37,540 --> 00:13:39,500
Let me get my things,
and I'll explain in the car.
363
00:13:39,500 --> 00:13:41,790
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
You're not getting your things.
364
00:13:41,790 --> 00:13:43,210
Good thinking.
Leave 'em here.
365
00:13:43,210 --> 00:13:45,500
Collateral damage.
No.
366
00:13:45,500 --> 00:13:47,080
Just because
something is hard
367
00:13:47,080 --> 00:13:48,880
does not mean
you run away from it.
368
00:13:48,880 --> 00:13:51,040
This is an opportunity
for you to make friends
369
00:13:51,040 --> 00:13:52,960
with some nice girls.
370
00:13:52,960 --> 00:13:54,830
I am not taking you home.
371
00:13:54,830 --> 00:13:58,250
Woman: Kids, it's time to
decorate your own cupcake!
372
00:13:58,250 --> 00:14:00,330
[ Sighs ]
I'm in hell.
373
00:14:00,330 --> 00:14:06,420
♪♪
374
00:14:06,420 --> 00:14:07,580
Katie: Viv?
375
00:14:07,580 --> 00:14:09,080
What are you doing here?
376
00:14:09,080 --> 00:14:11,290
Other than breastfeeding and
making Greg uncomfortable.
377
00:14:11,290 --> 00:14:12,330
I couldn't figure out
378
00:14:12,330 --> 00:14:14,120
a way of getting past her
without looking.
379
00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:15,620
Before I go out
with Alan for the night,
380
00:14:15,620 --> 00:14:18,250
I had to feed my sweet,
beautiful Violet.
381
00:14:18,250 --> 00:14:20,460
This is always
the best part of my day.
382
00:14:20,460 --> 00:14:21,880
Mm.
383
00:14:21,880 --> 00:14:24,710
I remember when I had
best parts of my day.
384
00:14:24,710 --> 00:14:26,040
All right, Viv.
385
00:14:26,040 --> 00:14:27,420
[ Door closes ]
The car's out--
386
00:14:27,420 --> 00:14:29,830
Why are you breastfeeding
Katie's baby?
387
00:14:29,830 --> 00:14:32,000
Uh...
When you left Viv,
388
00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:36,620
she became so poor that...I had
to hire her...as my wet nurse.
389
00:14:36,620 --> 00:14:37,960
That's...right.
390
00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:39,620
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
391
00:14:39,620 --> 00:14:42,750
Um, Katie is just one of
my many clients that I wet for.
392
00:14:43,880 --> 00:14:46,040
I-I'm not an idiot, okay?
393
00:14:46,040 --> 00:14:47,580
Okay, Alan...
394
00:14:49,120 --> 00:14:50,580
...Violet's my baby.
395
00:14:50,580 --> 00:14:52,750
Since we've been divorced,
you had a baby?
396
00:14:52,750 --> 00:14:54,170
Alan, what you have
to understand --
397
00:14:54,170 --> 00:14:55,920
[Bleep] I looked.
398
00:14:59,210 --> 00:15:01,380
And the father
was a pig whisperer,
399
00:15:01,380 --> 00:15:02,790
he caught me at a very
vulnerable time.
400
00:15:02,790 --> 00:15:05,210
But then he left town and
I never heard from him again.
401
00:15:05,210 --> 00:15:07,000
Well, the "old me" would've
dumped you immediately.
402
00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:09,500
But Swami Gary's taught me
to think before I act.
403
00:15:09,500 --> 00:15:11,210
He calls it "thacting."
404
00:15:11,210 --> 00:15:13,000
What other vocab did
Swami Gary teach you?
405
00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:14,620
Douching, by chance?
406
00:15:14,620 --> 00:15:17,170
As in, the act
of being a douche?
407
00:15:17,170 --> 00:15:19,580
Here's my offer -- we're gonna
Westport the whole situation.
408
00:15:19,580 --> 00:15:21,670
We're gonna hire
an entire staff of nannies.
409
00:15:21,670 --> 00:15:23,670
They're gonna care for her.
They're gonna feed her.
410
00:15:23,670 --> 00:15:25,000
They're gonna take her
to tennis lessons, okay?
411
00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:26,420
When she's old enough,
412
00:15:26,420 --> 00:15:28,210
we're gonna get her into
a Swiss boarding school.
413
00:15:28,210 --> 00:15:29,670
And then you and I
will live our lives --
414
00:15:29,670 --> 00:15:31,000
our big, awesome,
amazing lives,
415
00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:32,880
and you are gonna want
for nothing.
416
00:15:32,880 --> 00:15:35,250
Um...
417
00:15:35,250 --> 00:15:37,040
I --
Viv?
418
00:15:37,040 --> 00:15:39,670
I'll be in the car,
okay?
419
00:15:39,670 --> 00:15:41,750
Amazeballs.
420
00:15:41,750 --> 00:15:43,620
Means "namaste,"
essentially.
421
00:15:45,920 --> 00:15:47,540
Okay, before you say anything,
422
00:15:47,540 --> 00:15:49,330
maybe it is a good plan.
[ Door opens, closes ]
423
00:15:49,330 --> 00:15:50,540
Maybe Violet
will be better off.
424
00:15:50,540 --> 00:15:52,250
Viv --
And you'll be better off!
425
00:15:52,250 --> 00:15:54,000
I won't be here all the time
426
00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:56,120
bothering you,
taking your stuff,
427
00:15:56,120 --> 00:15:58,290
showering at your place
when you guys are gone.
428
00:15:58,290 --> 00:16:00,170
It took you so long
to leave on Thursday.
429
00:16:00,170 --> 00:16:01,580
Oh.
Greg?
430
00:16:01,580 --> 00:16:02,830
A word?
431
00:16:02,830 --> 00:16:07,960
♪♪
432
00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:13,330
♪♪
433
00:16:13,330 --> 00:16:14,920
I called the vet,
and they said pumpkin
434
00:16:14,920 --> 00:16:17,500
will make him go immediately,
so I fed him a can and a half.
435
00:16:17,500 --> 00:16:18,960
Smart.
[ Luthor sniffing ]
436
00:16:18,960 --> 00:16:20,460
Come on, boy!
Give us some earrings!
437
00:16:20,460 --> 00:16:22,250
And cufflinks --
don't forget the cufflinks.
438
00:16:22,250 --> 00:16:23,920
Whoa, whoa.
He needs his space.
439
00:16:25,290 --> 00:16:27,250
Ooh,
I think he's ready to go.
440
00:16:27,250 --> 00:16:28,540
How can you tell?
441
00:16:28,540 --> 00:16:29,710
It looks like
he's trying to solve
442
00:16:29,710 --> 00:16:31,710
a really hard
math problem.
443
00:16:31,710 --> 00:16:34,120
[ Gasps ]
Good boy, good boy!
444
00:16:37,500 --> 00:16:39,040
[ Gasps ]
Mom's earrings!
445
00:16:40,460 --> 00:16:42,080
[ Sighs ]
Where are my cufflinks?
446
00:16:43,830 --> 00:16:45,290
Come on, boy.
What else you got in there?
447
00:16:45,290 --> 00:16:47,620
A thimble? A race car?
448
00:16:47,620 --> 00:16:49,420
Well, looks like he got
into Monopoly.
449
00:16:49,420 --> 00:16:51,120
Come on, boy.
Where are my cufflinks?
450
00:16:51,120 --> 00:16:53,080
Luthor never ate
your cufflinks.
451
00:16:53,080 --> 00:16:54,080
He didn't?
452
00:16:54,080 --> 00:16:55,250
Then where are they?
453
00:16:55,250 --> 00:16:56,960
I couldn't feed cufflinks
to our dog.
454
00:16:56,960 --> 00:16:58,580
I'm not a monster.
455
00:16:58,580 --> 00:17:00,000
I just needed you
to help me.
456
00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:01,420
[ Cufflinks jingle ]
457
00:17:01,420 --> 00:17:05,620
♪♪
458
00:17:05,620 --> 00:17:07,500
Really?
459
00:17:07,500 --> 00:17:08,790
You played me?
460
00:17:10,250 --> 00:17:11,920
All new respect.
461
00:17:11,920 --> 00:17:14,380
For the "dumb one,"
that was a pretty smart move.
462
00:17:14,380 --> 00:17:16,380
I think you mean
for the "dumb whom,"
463
00:17:16,380 --> 00:17:17,620
that was a pretty
smart move.
464
00:17:17,620 --> 00:17:20,040
♪♪
465
00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:22,500
Here's the problem --
466
00:17:22,500 --> 00:17:25,330
Evil Katie almost
has Viv out of her hair.
467
00:17:25,330 --> 00:17:27,380
She wants fewer people
depending on her
468
00:17:27,380 --> 00:17:29,120
so she can have
more of a life.
469
00:17:29,120 --> 00:17:32,750
And sending Viv off with Alan
would do that in spades.
470
00:17:32,750 --> 00:17:34,620
But Good Katie knows...
471
00:17:34,620 --> 00:17:38,080
That Viv and her baby
belong together.
472
00:17:38,080 --> 00:17:40,880
But Evil Katie is tired of
using Russian dressing
473
00:17:40,880 --> 00:17:43,750
to cover her blemishes because
Viv stole her concealer.
474
00:17:43,750 --> 00:17:45,920
But we're human beings,
and...
475
00:17:45,920 --> 00:17:48,170
And...we need to do
the right thing.
476
00:17:49,580 --> 00:17:51,380
Fine.
477
00:17:51,380 --> 00:17:53,960
I blame you for making me
a better person.
478
00:17:53,960 --> 00:17:55,120
It's very unpleasant.
479
00:17:59,830 --> 00:18:03,830
Viv, I know that
you have told me
480
00:18:03,830 --> 00:18:07,380
that you are not mom material,
but you are wrong.
481
00:18:07,380 --> 00:18:09,080
I am?
Yes.
482
00:18:09,080 --> 00:18:12,290
Violet is amazing.
483
00:18:12,290 --> 00:18:14,880
I tried to make her cry
repeatedly today -- Wait, why would you --
484
00:18:14,880 --> 00:18:17,290
It's not important, Viv.
[ Horn honks ]
485
00:18:17,290 --> 00:18:19,540
It's Alan.
[ Sighs ]
486
00:18:19,540 --> 00:18:22,790
You have got
the best baby ever.
487
00:18:22,790 --> 00:18:25,460
And there is only
one reason for it.
488
00:18:25,460 --> 00:18:28,830
Because she has got
the best mom ever.
489
00:18:28,830 --> 00:18:30,750
You really think
I'm a good mom?
490
00:18:30,750 --> 00:18:32,250
I know you are.
491
00:18:32,250 --> 00:18:33,620
Ugh!
492
00:18:33,620 --> 00:18:35,250
That is such a relief
493
00:18:35,250 --> 00:18:37,120
because I stole
your "best mom ever" mug,
494
00:18:37,120 --> 00:18:38,540
and I felt really bad
about it.
495
00:18:38,540 --> 00:18:40,170
But now I feel like
I earned it.
496
00:18:41,670 --> 00:18:42,750
You know what?
497
00:18:42,750 --> 00:18:46,250
I don't need a man
to make me happy.
498
00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:49,830
Because you make me happy.
499
00:18:49,830 --> 00:18:51,040
[ Coos ]
500
00:18:51,040 --> 00:18:52,750
Yes, you do.
501
00:18:52,750 --> 00:18:57,880
Violet, it'll be the two of us
against the world.
502
00:18:57,880 --> 00:19:02,670
It'll be the two of you plus the
Otto family against the world.
503
00:19:05,420 --> 00:19:07,920
I don't need a man.
504
00:19:07,920 --> 00:19:10,790
[ Chuckles ]
Because you're my man.
505
00:19:10,790 --> 00:19:16,540
[ Grunts ]
Oh, gosh, you're my big, strong, burly man.
506
00:19:16,540 --> 00:19:18,000
[ Smooches ]
507
00:19:19,420 --> 00:19:20,830
I could kill Good Katie.
508
00:19:20,830 --> 00:19:22,830
Mm.
509
00:19:22,830 --> 00:19:28,000
♪♪
510
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:30,000
Look who I have here.
511
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:32,620
Oh my God, Greg,
she's alive!
512
00:19:32,620 --> 00:19:33,920
She made it through
the sleepover
513
00:19:33,920 --> 00:19:35,830
and nothing bad happened!
514
00:19:35,830 --> 00:19:37,000
Alright, I get it.
515
00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:38,380
You were right,
it was good.
516
00:19:38,380 --> 00:19:40,710
We made S'mores and had
a marshmallow fight.
517
00:19:40,710 --> 00:19:42,670
I'm glad I stayed.
518
00:19:42,670 --> 00:19:44,500
Anna-Kat.
519
00:19:44,500 --> 00:19:46,670
Yeah?
520
00:19:46,670 --> 00:19:48,120
I am proud of you.
521
00:19:48,120 --> 00:19:50,120
[ Chuckles ]
Thanks, Mom.
522
00:19:50,120 --> 00:19:51,080
"Mom"?
523
00:19:51,080 --> 00:19:52,670
Yeah, "Mom."
524
00:19:52,670 --> 00:19:54,040
None of the kids
say "Mama."
525
00:19:54,040 --> 00:19:55,830
That's for babies.
526
00:19:55,830 --> 00:19:57,420
[ Sighs ]
527
00:19:59,500 --> 00:20:01,960
No more "Mama."
528
00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:04,080
I'm not "Mama" anymore.
529
00:20:04,080 --> 00:20:06,250
I'm now..."Mom."
530
00:20:06,250 --> 00:20:08,540
[ Groans ]
531
00:20:08,540 --> 00:20:10,080
"Mom."
532
00:20:10,080 --> 00:20:12,000
It's the end of an era.
533
00:20:14,040 --> 00:20:16,830
She was so little.
534
00:20:16,830 --> 00:20:19,380
So...fourth baby?
535
00:20:23,170 --> 00:20:24,380
Nah.
536
00:20:24,380 --> 00:20:26,460
I'm just gonna teach Luthor
to call me "Mama."
537
00:20:26,460 --> 00:20:28,920
I saw a husky do it
on the Internet.
538
00:20:34,620 --> 00:20:37,120
I am telling you
it is more fun
539
00:20:37,120 --> 00:20:39,040
to steal from restaurants
than your friends.
540
00:20:39,040 --> 00:20:40,330
Okay.
541
00:20:40,330 --> 00:20:42,120
One...two...
542
00:20:42,120 --> 00:20:43,540
three...now!
543
00:20:43,540 --> 00:20:45,000
[ Thud ]
544
00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:46,920
You're right.
And it's always stocked.
545
00:20:46,920 --> 00:20:49,880
I mean, I could never get real
maple syrup at your place,
546
00:20:49,880 --> 00:20:51,080
I mean, 'cause
you're always like,
547
00:20:51,080 --> 00:20:52,580
"glug, glug, glug,
glug, glug."
548
00:20:52,580 --> 00:20:55,040
[ Quietly ] When the manager
turns away, grab the ketchup.
549
00:20:55,040 --> 00:20:55,920
[ Whispering ]
Oh, no, no, no.
550
00:20:55,920 --> 00:20:57,040
I've already stolen like
551
00:20:57,040 --> 00:20:58,670
three ketchups from you.
552
00:20:58,670 --> 00:21:02,000
But they have those tiny
hot sauces, and I love those.
553
00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:03,620
Okay, on three.
Okay.
554
00:21:03,620 --> 00:21:05,670
One...Two...
555
00:21:05,670 --> 00:21:07,000
[ Gasps ]
Dibs!
556
00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:08,580
Oh.
It's taco night tonight.
557
00:21:08,580 --> 00:21:10,750
I'll make it up to you.
Next stop -- Starbucks.
558
00:21:10,750 --> 00:21:12,330
When you ask them
for almond milk,
559
00:21:12,330 --> 00:21:13,670
they hand you
a whole carton.
560
00:21:13,670 --> 00:21:15,080
So fun!
Yeah.
561
00:21:15,130 --> 00:21:19,680
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