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1
00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:03,680
The big news is that you have a
half-brother, Flo, called Austin.
2
00:00:03,680 --> 00:00:06,320
Famous children's book author,
son he never knew he had,
3
00:00:06,320 --> 00:00:08,640
tracks down his dad -
there could be a book in it.
4
00:00:08,640 --> 00:00:10,240
Or it could be a documentary.
5
00:00:10,240 --> 00:00:11,840
I think we should make this film.
6
00:00:11,840 --> 00:00:14,000
We even have a responsibility
to make this film.
7
00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:15,640
Get down! Down!
8
00:00:15,640 --> 00:00:17,200
Does separate bedrooms mean
9
00:00:17,200 --> 00:00:19,720
no creative workshops
outside office hours?
10
00:00:19,720 --> 00:00:22,720
'Creative workshops outside
office hours' means sex, right?
11
00:00:22,720 --> 00:00:23,880
Yes, mate. Yeah.
12
00:00:28,400 --> 00:00:31,440
OK. So I'm male and I'm silent.
13
00:00:32,720 --> 00:00:34,880
Yeah.
Honestly, I can't...
14
00:00:34,880 --> 00:00:36,640
Oh, come on! It's...
No, I can't think.
15
00:00:36,640 --> 00:00:39,000
I just literally can't think
of a single silent character.
16
00:00:39,000 --> 00:00:41,520
Well, there's hundreds of them.
You're so bad at this game!
17
00:00:41,520 --> 00:00:44,160
No, I'm not. I'm reigning family
champion, thank you very much.
18
00:00:44,160 --> 00:00:46,600
Well, that's only 'cause
you give us such obscure ones.
19
00:00:46,600 --> 00:00:48,200
Go on.
Um, OK.
20
00:00:49,200 --> 00:00:50,720
Oh, am I Batman?
21
00:00:50,720 --> 00:00:53,000
Batman? Batman talks all the time!
22
00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:55,440
Why would you guess Batman?
Do you see yourself as Batman?
23
00:00:55,440 --> 00:00:58,000
It's all about how you see me,
isn't it? You wrote it.
24
00:00:58,000 --> 00:01:00,400
Ah! Austin, your go.
25
00:01:00,400 --> 00:01:03,480
So, to re-cap, I'm known
for being on television...
26
00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:06,080
Yes. And film and stage.
And stage, yeah.
27
00:01:06,080 --> 00:01:07,680
I'm regarded as an expert
in my field.
28
00:01:07,680 --> 00:01:09,280
Definitely.
I'm English.
29
00:01:09,280 --> 00:01:10,760
Yes.
Very.
30
00:01:10,760 --> 00:01:12,480
Well-bred.
Certainly.
31
00:01:12,480 --> 00:01:15,000
Talented and awarded in my field.
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
32
00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:17,400
I'm regarded as a national treasure.
BOTH: Yes!
33
00:01:17,400 --> 00:01:19,360
And I Billie Piper?
34
00:01:20,760 --> 00:01:22,720
Nearly.
Uh...close?
35
00:01:22,720 --> 00:01:24,400
I mean...
Ish.
36
00:01:24,400 --> 00:01:27,880
I've never been to a slumber party
before but if I'm not Billie Piper,
37
00:01:27,880 --> 00:01:30,480
I think it's time
to retire to my quarters.
38
00:01:31,560 --> 00:01:33,480
You...you can take the sticker off.
39
00:01:35,160 --> 00:01:37,520
(LIVELY MUSIC)
40
00:01:50,240 --> 00:01:52,680
RADIO ANNOUNCER: Well, now
time for the shipping forecast,
41
00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:54,400
issued by the Met Office,
42
00:01:54,400 --> 00:01:57,360
on behalf of the Maritime
and Coastguard Agency
43
00:01:57,360 --> 00:02:01,000
at 0500 on Tuesday, 8 August.
44
00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:02,520
The general synopsis...
45
00:02:02,520 --> 00:02:04,240
(MOANS)
(YELLS) Holy shit!
46
00:02:04,240 --> 00:02:07,120
Oh, my... Bubs!
Hi!
47
00:02:07,120 --> 00:02:09,520
Bubs!
Hello!
48
00:02:09,520 --> 00:02:12,320
What are you doing here?
What are YOU doing here?
49
00:02:12,320 --> 00:02:14,320
Mmm.
Oh, my god.
50
00:02:14,320 --> 00:02:16,360
Mum, does that come on
every morning?
51
00:02:16,360 --> 00:02:18,800
Yeah, well, I like waking up
to the shipping forecast.
52
00:02:18,800 --> 00:02:23,000
I mean...oh! Oh, my god, Mum!
It's 5:00am! It's so early!
53
00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:25,720
The day doesn't start
for another six hours.
54
00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:29,760
Well, I like it.
Helps me prepare for the day.
55
00:02:29,760 --> 00:02:33,280
What - for all the sailing
you're going to do?
56
00:02:33,280 --> 00:02:35,000
How are you?
57
00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:36,880
What time did you get here?
58
00:02:36,880 --> 00:02:41,040
It must have been late.
I...did try to go into my room.
59
00:02:41,040 --> 00:02:43,480
But then I realised...
I'm sorry!
60
00:02:43,480 --> 00:02:45,320
It was fine.
I'm sorry.
61
00:02:45,320 --> 00:02:47,920
Yeah, I haven't actually, um,
met my secret half-brother yet,
62
00:02:47,920 --> 00:02:50,040
so it's probably a bit soon
for a top and tail.
63
00:02:50,040 --> 00:02:51,720
Yeah. Well, that was very wise.
64
00:02:51,720 --> 00:02:53,880
Save the pyjama party
for the next couple of days, eh?
65
00:02:53,880 --> 00:02:56,680
Mmm.
Mmmmmwah! Missed you.
66
00:02:56,680 --> 00:02:58,680
Mum, he does know
that I'm coming, right?
67
00:02:58,680 --> 00:03:00,400
Yeah, of course he does!
68
00:03:00,400 --> 00:03:02,760
Yeah, we were just expecting you
today, in the daylight.
69
00:03:02,760 --> 00:03:05,000
Well, I like driving at night.
Yeah. Fewer witnesses.
70
00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:06,480
Exactly.
71
00:03:07,480 --> 00:03:09,400
I do have a question.
Mm-hm.
72
00:03:10,400 --> 00:03:13,720
It just seems...very snug in here.
73
00:03:13,720 --> 00:03:17,880
I...I don't know - maybe somebody
is sleeping in here full-time.
74
00:03:17,880 --> 00:03:21,200
You're very perceptive, my Florence.
Have I told you that before?
75
00:03:21,200 --> 00:03:22,920
Yes.
Yeah.
76
00:03:22,920 --> 00:03:24,840
I am just, um...
77
00:03:25,920 --> 00:03:28,200
..taking a bit of space, you know?
78
00:03:28,200 --> 00:03:30,840
Trying to work out
what my next, uh, thing is.
79
00:03:30,840 --> 00:03:33,240
You know?
Mmm. Deep-sea fishing?
80
00:03:33,240 --> 00:03:36,200
(CHUCKLES) I have to say,
that does sound very appealing.
81
00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:37,520
Mmm.
82
00:03:43,960 --> 00:03:46,280
Morning, Austin!
Ah, good morning, Geoffrey.
83
00:03:46,280 --> 00:03:48,840
I'm just off down that new deli
down on the corner.
84
00:03:48,840 --> 00:03:50,880
They've got some beautiful
hummus down there.
85
00:03:50,880 --> 00:03:52,480
That sounds marvellous.
Yeah.
86
00:03:52,480 --> 00:03:54,520
Hey, you cleaned up at the darts,
didn't you?
87
00:03:54,520 --> 00:03:56,840
Yes. I believe I am
what you would call a natural.
88
00:03:56,840 --> 00:03:59,560
Yeah, well, you're better than
your dad, that's for sure.
89
00:03:59,560 --> 00:04:01,880
No, he let me down
quite badly, actually.
90
00:04:01,880 --> 00:04:03,760
I'm not surprised.
He's not very sporty.
91
00:04:03,760 --> 00:04:06,640
Hey - they've got a new competition
running next week.
92
00:04:06,640 --> 00:04:08,640
500 pounds cash prize.
93
00:04:08,640 --> 00:04:10,640
Interested? Want to team up?
94
00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:12,480
500 pounds.
95
00:04:12,480 --> 00:04:16,560
Otherwise known as a monkey.
You remembered! Well done! Good boy.
96
00:04:16,560 --> 00:04:19,080
Well...gooday!
97
00:04:19,080 --> 00:04:21,000
You remembered!
(LAUGHS)
98
00:04:22,360 --> 00:04:26,480
Austin...you'll say hi
to Ingrid for me, will ya?
99
00:04:26,480 --> 00:04:28,280
Will do.
Alright.
100
00:04:28,280 --> 00:04:31,000
Take care, Geoffrey.
I'll save you some hummus.
101
00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:36,000
BILL: I think he's set
for a day at home.
102
00:04:37,640 --> 00:04:40,000
Fancy some sight-seeing?
103
00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:43,200
Ever since I was a boy, I've been
fascinated with Stonehenge.
104
00:04:50,120 --> 00:04:52,080
Come in.
105
00:04:52,080 --> 00:04:55,560
Oh, Austin! That's so sweet.
Thank you so much.
106
00:04:55,560 --> 00:04:58,000
That's alright. Uh, hello, Florence.
107
00:04:58,000 --> 00:04:59,600
I didn't expect to see you here.
108
00:04:59,600 --> 00:05:01,240
Hi, Austin. Hi.
Sorry.
109
00:05:01,240 --> 00:05:03,000
We didn't mean to surprise you.
110
00:05:03,000 --> 00:05:05,120
Florence snuck in
under cloak of darkness.
111
00:05:05,120 --> 00:05:08,000
That's OK. Did you drive
through the night?
112
00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:11,000
Yeah, I did, but I do it
all the time and it's fine.
113
00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:14,520
Goodness, I'm... Sorry.
I'm surprised. Hi! Hi.
114
00:05:14,520 --> 00:05:17,560
It's a pleasure to meet you,
Florence, my half-sister.
115
00:05:17,560 --> 00:05:20,360
Um...do you hug?
Or...or is a handshake OK?
116
00:05:20,360 --> 00:05:22,640
Uh, have you washed them recently?
117
00:05:23,680 --> 00:05:25,720
No, she hasn't.
Maybe later, then.
118
00:05:25,720 --> 00:05:27,280
Sure. Totally. That's...that's fine.
119
00:05:27,280 --> 00:05:29,640
I mean, I'm gonna get a shower
in a minute anyway. I just...
120
00:05:29,640 --> 00:05:31,720
I actually stink.
Yes.
121
00:05:31,720 --> 00:05:34,760
But I have a question - can I
interest you in some breakfast?
122
00:05:34,760 --> 00:05:37,320
Awww, you don't need
to do that, Austin.
123
00:05:37,320 --> 00:05:39,280
I'm...I'm just gonna have muesli.
124
00:05:39,280 --> 00:05:42,000
Florence, how do you feel
about gentleman's relish
125
00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:44,360
with honey and marmalade
on toast with eggs?
126
00:05:44,360 --> 00:05:46,360
Uh...yeah, gentleman's relish -
is that...
127
00:05:46,360 --> 00:05:48,600
That's anchovy paste.
Anchovy paste.
128
00:05:49,800 --> 00:05:54,000
Gentleman's relish and marmalade
does sound delicious...
129
00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:55,800
Great! I'll get started.
130
00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:01,680
OK. So, you remember how I told you
he doesn't really do sarcasm?
131
00:06:01,680 --> 00:06:03,440
Yeah. Oh, sh...
Enjoy!
132
00:06:03,440 --> 00:06:05,240
Is he gonna make it?
133
00:06:06,640 --> 00:06:09,080
Gonna make Ingrid a cup of tea.
134
00:06:09,080 --> 00:06:11,640
Already done. Florence might
like some, though.
135
00:06:11,640 --> 00:06:13,120
Florence?
136
00:06:13,120 --> 00:06:14,800
You should warn her
that driving at night
137
00:06:14,800 --> 00:06:16,440
increases the risk
of a fatal car crash.
138
00:06:17,480 --> 00:06:20,080
Right. Yeah. Well, I'll be sure
to tell her off about that.
139
00:06:20,080 --> 00:06:23,520
Um, so...what, you guys have met?
140
00:06:23,520 --> 00:06:27,560
Um, how'd it go? I mean, was it OK?
Was it awkward?
141
00:06:27,560 --> 00:06:29,400
I'm sorry, mate.
I should have been there.
142
00:06:29,400 --> 00:06:31,000
Ingrid was there
143
00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:33,640
and also, Dad, sometimes I think
that the pomp and ceremony
144
00:06:33,640 --> 00:06:35,520
would make things more awkward.
145
00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:37,000
Oh, yeah. Quite right.
146
00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:39,800
So...how did she seem?
147
00:06:39,800 --> 00:06:41,680
She needs a good wash.
Oh.
148
00:06:41,680 --> 00:06:43,880
OK. Well, I'll be sure
to tell her that as well.
149
00:06:43,880 --> 00:06:45,400
I already did.
150
00:06:45,400 --> 00:06:47,640
I believe that honesty
is very important in a family,
151
00:06:47,640 --> 00:06:49,200
even between half-siblings.
152
00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:50,920
Ah. I couldn't agree more.
153
00:06:50,920 --> 00:06:53,840
You know, Austin, I think you're
gonna be an amazing influence
154
00:06:53,840 --> 00:06:55,360
on Julian and this family.
155
00:06:55,360 --> 00:06:56,960
I really do.
Absolutely.
156
00:06:56,960 --> 00:06:58,960
Although sometimes,
I think a little white lie
157
00:06:58,960 --> 00:07:01,000
to preserve someone's feelings
is permitted.
158
00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:02,760
Should I have said
that she smelt nice?
159
00:07:02,760 --> 00:07:04,920
Usually it's better
to compliment something else,
160
00:07:04,920 --> 00:07:06,720
like, um...I don't know -
"I love your hair."
161
00:07:06,720 --> 00:07:08,760
Her hair is very messy.
Now, sit down and relax, Dad.
162
00:07:08,760 --> 00:07:10,320
I'm making everybody breakfast.
163
00:07:10,320 --> 00:07:12,200
So, Austin, have you got
any plans for today?
164
00:07:12,200 --> 00:07:14,160
I was gonna pick up some more cheese.
165
00:07:14,160 --> 00:07:16,320
Great! Great.
I think we need more cheese.
166
00:07:16,320 --> 00:07:17,960
That's what I thought.
167
00:07:17,960 --> 00:07:20,440
I was joking. I mean, it...
t doesn't matter. Sorry.
168
00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:22,960
So, what is going on with
this documentary screening?
169
00:07:22,960 --> 00:07:24,440
Ah! Yes.
170
00:07:24,440 --> 00:07:27,560
Well, uh, it starts at 4 o'clock, so
I thought we'd get there about 3:30,
171
00:07:27,560 --> 00:07:29,280
grab a few snacks,
maybe some popcorn.
172
00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:30,840
But who's coming?
173
00:07:30,840 --> 00:07:33,080
Well, I mean, the four of us,
Heidi, Ginny and Sue...
174
00:07:33,080 --> 00:07:35,960
It's only just a handful, really.
It's only a rough-cut screening.
175
00:07:35,960 --> 00:07:39,520
Oh - uh, Heidi has invited
a few buyers but no replies yet.
176
00:07:39,520 --> 00:07:42,480
Buyers? Surely it's too premature
for buyers.
177
00:07:42,480 --> 00:07:44,440
No, no, this is exactly
what you do, you know?
178
00:07:44,440 --> 00:07:46,760
Bit of light flirting, tease them
with the promise of it.
179
00:07:46,760 --> 00:07:49,000
But how promising is a rough cut?
It's really promising.
180
00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:51,320
Is it, though? Have you seen it?
I'm right across it.
181
00:07:51,320 --> 00:07:53,440
OK. Well, that makes me
feel a lot better.
182
00:07:53,440 --> 00:07:55,800
What could possibly go wrong?
I'll wear my business suit.
183
00:07:55,800 --> 00:07:58,760
First impressions are very important.
Quite right. Yeah, me too.
184
00:07:58,760 --> 00:08:01,640
I'm gonna pop on one of my best
suits, really look the part.
185
00:08:01,640 --> 00:08:04,640
What, you mean one of the suits
you had made in Turkey in the '90s?
186
00:08:04,640 --> 00:08:06,640
The '90s is back in fashion,
I'll have you know.
187
00:08:06,640 --> 00:08:08,120
Is it?
188
00:08:08,120 --> 00:08:09,600
(CHUCKLES)
189
00:08:09,600 --> 00:08:11,560
Actually, they're not all
made in Turkey.
190
00:08:11,560 --> 00:08:14,440
I've got a really nice blue one
here, from that photoshoot with GQ.
191
00:08:14,440 --> 00:08:16,440
What photoshoot with GQ?
192
00:08:16,440 --> 00:08:18,160
Oh, what the hell?
193
00:08:18,160 --> 00:08:20,720
Julian, did you get asked to do
another photoshoot without me?
194
00:08:20,720 --> 00:08:23,240
And you sold a bloody suit!
I'm sure you were there.
195
00:08:23,240 --> 00:08:25,760
Well, if I was there, where's my
designer contraband, then?
196
00:08:25,760 --> 00:08:28,240
Ooh! That's nice. Very dapper.
197
00:08:28,240 --> 00:08:32,160
Florence has gone to the studio to
look for some hacksaws and machinery.
198
00:08:32,160 --> 00:08:34,040
Should I be concerned?
199
00:08:34,040 --> 00:08:36,600
No, she's got a side hustle making
jewellery out of objet trouve.
200
00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:38,080
Discarded rubbish.
201
00:08:38,080 --> 00:08:40,600
Yes, it's extremely hygienic
and highly profitable.
202
00:08:40,600 --> 00:08:42,560
Was that...
Sorry.
203
00:08:42,560 --> 00:08:45,600
Uh, more sarcasm. Sorry, Austin.
Oh, no. Please don't apologise.
204
00:08:45,600 --> 00:08:49,360
I love replaying every sentence to
determine if it's genuine or not.
205
00:08:49,360 --> 00:08:51,000
Nice.
Very good.
206
00:08:52,120 --> 00:08:53,600
OK. (CLEARS THROAT)
207
00:08:54,720 --> 00:08:56,640
What do you think?
No. Horrid.
208
00:08:56,640 --> 00:08:58,480
Annie Leibovitz said
it really suited me.
209
00:08:58,480 --> 00:08:59,960
I know you like blue
210
00:08:59,960 --> 00:09:02,120
but that's a very different thing
from it suiting you.
211
00:09:02,120 --> 00:09:03,880
Blue's always been
my favourite colour.
212
00:09:03,880 --> 00:09:06,240
Yeah, well, I mean, sometimes,
your favourite colour...
213
00:09:06,240 --> 00:09:07,720
doesn't work for you anymore.
214
00:09:07,720 --> 00:09:09,560
What's that supposed to mean?
215
00:09:09,560 --> 00:09:11,200
Well, it's just complex, isn't it?
216
00:09:11,200 --> 00:09:14,080
I mean, that's not even blue -
it's...it's Prussian slate.
217
00:09:14,080 --> 00:09:16,400
OK. I just really love
wearing Prussian slate.
218
00:09:16,400 --> 00:09:18,120
Well...
219
00:09:18,120 --> 00:09:19,800
at the moment,
220
00:09:19,800 --> 00:09:24,000
Prussian slate isn't sure
if it loves you wearing it.
221
00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:27,040
Is Prussian slate gonna be
worn by someone else?
222
00:09:27,040 --> 00:09:29,000
That's not what this is about!
223
00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:32,480
Prussian slate doesn't want or need
to be worn by anyone else right now.
224
00:09:32,480 --> 00:09:34,720
Just...you need to wear grey.
225
00:09:34,720 --> 00:09:37,040
Grey? Is that... Who's grey?
226
00:09:37,040 --> 00:09:39,200
Nobody's grey. Grey's just a colour.
Oh, good.
227
00:09:39,200 --> 00:09:41,400
Grey's actually
very sophisticated, Dad.
228
00:09:41,400 --> 00:09:45,080
The foreign minister back in Canberra
always wears grey.
229
00:09:45,080 --> 00:09:47,000
In that case, my mind's made up.
230
00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:48,600
I'll wear Prussian slate.
231
00:09:49,880 --> 00:09:51,400
Good for you.
232
00:09:54,520 --> 00:09:57,480
I can't see anything
through this incessant drizzle.
233
00:09:57,480 --> 00:09:59,800
They say that often,
the most unlikely hypothesis
234
00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:01,360
is the correct one.
235
00:10:01,360 --> 00:10:03,360
Who says that?
Mathematicians.
236
00:10:03,360 --> 00:10:04,720
Really?
237
00:10:04,720 --> 00:10:06,640
Well, just because
it doesn't make sense to you,
238
00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:08,200
doesn't mean it's not true.
239
00:10:08,200 --> 00:10:09,960
It doesn't make sense to anyone.
It does!
240
00:10:09,960 --> 00:10:11,640
Otherwise, how would
I know about it?
241
00:10:11,640 --> 00:10:13,600
Dad...
Melanie, just hear me out.
242
00:10:13,600 --> 00:10:15,400
They could see
that the ancient people
243
00:10:15,400 --> 00:10:17,560
weren't gonna be able
to manage on their own,
244
00:10:17,560 --> 00:10:20,920
so they popped down
and used their advanced technology
245
00:10:20,920 --> 00:10:24,000
to buzz around a bit and voila!
246
00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:25,720
Stonehenge.
247
00:10:33,400 --> 00:10:35,640
Hey, Flossie!
How are you getting on?
248
00:10:35,640 --> 00:10:37,840
Oh, my word!
What are these all doing out?
249
00:10:37,840 --> 00:10:40,560
Well, I just found them
when I was moving some boxes.
250
00:10:40,560 --> 00:10:42,600
Oh, that is Wolfie.
251
00:10:42,600 --> 00:10:44,440
Who's Wolfie?
252
00:10:44,440 --> 00:10:48,800
Wolfie from the Vienna School of Art
has the most amazing co...
253
00:10:48,800 --> 00:10:51,280
I just have...I'm sorry, I just
haven't seen these for ages.
254
00:10:51,280 --> 00:10:53,800
Were they out the back?
Yeah, they were just hiding.
255
00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:55,320
It's my phallum series.
256
00:10:55,320 --> 00:10:57,920
It was feminist, for reasons
I no longer recall.
257
00:10:57,920 --> 00:11:00,800
Jesus Christ, Mum -
is...is that Dad?
258
00:11:00,800 --> 00:11:03,800
Yeah. 20 years ago.
259
00:11:03,800 --> 00:11:05,800
OK, Mum. No, focus, please.
260
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:09,000
I think this should be
your next thing.
261
00:11:11,000 --> 00:11:12,920
Well, this is my forever thing.
262
00:11:12,920 --> 00:11:15,480
This is...I just...I just
put this on pause when I...
263
00:11:15,480 --> 00:11:17,120
They are really good.
264
00:11:17,120 --> 00:11:20,000
Are you serious?
I think you should exhibit.
265
00:11:20,000 --> 00:11:21,760
What?! Exhibit?
266
00:11:21,760 --> 00:11:23,320
Mmm.
These?
267
00:11:23,320 --> 00:11:26,240
Poppet? Chockie mow-wow?
Oh, thanks.
268
00:11:26,240 --> 00:11:28,720
Oh, having a clear-out?
No!
269
00:11:28,720 --> 00:11:30,720
Florence thinks
I should exhibit these.
270
00:11:30,720 --> 00:11:32,400
What?
But where?
271
00:11:33,440 --> 00:11:37,080
Ooh, I actually have a mate in East
with a space. Let me just...
272
00:11:37,080 --> 00:11:39,400
Yeah, let me just
give him a call, OK?
273
00:11:39,400 --> 00:11:40,920
The nudes. Right.
274
00:11:40,920 --> 00:11:43,000
No, well, yes, I mean,
I've always been, uh...
275
00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:47,680
very supportive of your,
um...nudity, er...uh, nudes.
276
00:11:47,680 --> 00:11:49,360
My phallum series.
Phallum series.
277
00:11:49,360 --> 00:11:50,840
Have you been supportive?
278
00:11:50,840 --> 00:11:52,640
'Cause I remember
your actual words were,
279
00:11:52,640 --> 00:11:54,640
"Oh, well - as long as it's
tax-deductible."
280
00:11:54,640 --> 00:11:56,440
Yeah, well, supportive
of both of us.
281
00:11:56,440 --> 00:11:58,320
But, uh, are you sure
you want to exhibit?
282
00:11:58,320 --> 00:12:00,680
You know, are you ready
for that, uh, scrutiny?
283
00:12:00,680 --> 00:12:02,720
Well, I don't need
your blessing, Julian.
284
00:12:02,720 --> 00:12:04,920
This is me going back
to my creative source.
285
00:12:04,920 --> 00:12:09,200
No more paws, no more claws, no more
ears, no more vestigial tails.
286
00:12:09,200 --> 00:12:11,440
I'm going back
to what inspires me - Man.
287
00:12:11,440 --> 00:12:13,560
Oh, I'm sorry - I didn't realise
that working with me
288
00:12:13,560 --> 00:12:15,600
on a beloved series
that brought joy to millions
289
00:12:15,600 --> 00:12:17,200
was quite so soul-destroying.
290
00:12:17,200 --> 00:12:19,960
Obviously it wasn't but I've been
through a lot of pain, Julian,
291
00:12:19,960 --> 00:12:21,800
and I just need something good
to come of it.
292
00:12:21,800 --> 00:12:24,040
What are you doing?
I think we should have a bonfire.
293
00:12:24,040 --> 00:12:26,240
Kind of a cremation, a ceremony.
294
00:12:26,240 --> 00:12:30,040
Great! Yes! Let's set fire to our
entire life's work! Fabulous!
295
00:12:30,040 --> 00:12:32,800
Well, it... Fine. You have the
sketches in your office, then.
296
00:12:32,800 --> 00:12:34,720
If I'm going to do this exhibition,
297
00:12:34,720 --> 00:12:37,000
I'm going to need space
to finish my canvasses.
298
00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:38,920
I'm feeling a bit...no.
299
00:12:38,920 --> 00:12:41,560
I'm feeling a bit...no!
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
300
00:12:41,560 --> 00:12:43,480
First you decide to start
sleeping in here,
301
00:12:43,480 --> 00:12:46,200
then you decide to start...
painting willies again!
302
00:12:46,200 --> 00:12:48,400
And burn all our history?!
303
00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:50,320
Don't be such a cry-baby!
304
00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:55,840
Is that...Geoffrey from next door?
305
00:13:00,560 --> 00:13:02,600
BILL: OK. So, giants.
306
00:13:02,600 --> 00:13:04,080
People were bigger then,
307
00:13:04,080 --> 00:13:07,480
so they could pick up the stones
and carry them from Wales.
308
00:13:07,480 --> 00:13:10,320
Giants? What, "Fee, fi, fo, fum?"
309
00:13:10,320 --> 00:13:12,160
No, OK. Fine.
310
00:13:12,160 --> 00:13:14,320
Alright - what about
that fellow, Merlin?
311
00:13:14,320 --> 00:13:16,560
I mean, who are we to say
that magic doesn't exist?
312
00:13:16,560 --> 00:13:18,200
Have you ever seen any magic?
313
00:13:18,200 --> 00:13:19,720
Well, good magic would be so good,
314
00:13:19,720 --> 00:13:21,720
you wouldn't even know
it was magic, right?
315
00:13:21,720 --> 00:13:24,360
Dad, I really don't think
Merlin built Stonehenge.
316
00:13:25,360 --> 00:13:28,600
(SIGHS) If we can't get
out of the sodding car,
317
00:13:28,600 --> 00:13:30,520
we'll never know, will we?
318
00:13:33,800 --> 00:13:36,160
Come in.
Ah, hello, Florence.
319
00:13:36,160 --> 00:13:39,160
How are you?
I'm great, thanks.
320
00:13:39,160 --> 00:13:41,000
What d'you think?
321
00:13:41,000 --> 00:13:42,480
Very...
322
00:13:43,800 --> 00:13:45,720
I like your hair.
323
00:13:45,720 --> 00:13:48,160
(CHUCKLES) You don't have to
give me false compliments.
324
00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:50,080
It's alright. We can do literal.
325
00:13:50,080 --> 00:13:52,040
I love literal.
OK. That's good.
326
00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:54,640
Because I do think that
the earrings are quite ugly.
327
00:13:54,640 --> 00:13:56,840
But I admire your creativity.
328
00:13:56,840 --> 00:13:59,560
And your hair certainly looks a lot
better than it did this morning.
329
00:13:59,560 --> 00:14:02,520
Well, thank you. And you, my friend,
are in a wicked suit.
330
00:14:02,520 --> 00:14:03,880
Thank you.
331
00:14:03,880 --> 00:14:06,400
Well, I came to say that we need
to leave shortly for the cinema.
332
00:14:06,400 --> 00:14:09,600
Oh, right! The, uh...the
documentary...viewing...thing.
333
00:14:09,600 --> 00:14:11,240
Yes.
OK.
334
00:14:11,240 --> 00:14:13,080
Refreshments will be provided.
Great.
335
00:14:13,080 --> 00:14:15,120
Do you like popcorn?
I love popcorn.
336
00:14:15,120 --> 00:14:17,080
And see, if you put
small bits of chocolate in
337
00:14:17,080 --> 00:14:18,720
with the sweet and salty, it just...
338
00:14:18,720 --> 00:14:21,120
Delicious.
That does sound delicious.
339
00:14:21,120 --> 00:14:24,640
OK. Well, I'm gonna go get ready,
I guess. Get changed.
340
00:14:24,640 --> 00:14:26,640
Oh, are these your paintings?
341
00:14:26,640 --> 00:14:30,000
No! They are Mum's.
Pretty racy, huh?
342
00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:32,320
Personally, I don't
approve of graphic nudity.
343
00:14:32,320 --> 00:14:35,040
However, I am aware that
a lot of people do love it.
344
00:14:35,040 --> 00:14:37,640
Yeah. Well, she's planning on
doing an exhibition, so...
345
00:14:37,640 --> 00:14:39,400
They'll be on display in public?!
346
00:14:39,400 --> 00:14:42,720
(LAUGHS) Yeah!
Wait...is that our dad?
347
00:14:43,760 --> 00:14:45,960
Yeah.
I really wish I didn't see that.
348
00:14:45,960 --> 00:14:47,520
I know.
349
00:14:51,120 --> 00:14:53,400
(CHATTER, LAUGHTER)
350
00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:02,880
I recognise everyone here.
351
00:15:02,880 --> 00:15:04,360
Well, I'd expect even you
352
00:15:04,360 --> 00:15:06,400
to recognise 10 of your
closest friends, Julian.
353
00:15:06,400 --> 00:15:09,400
Apart from those people with
Yolanda. Are they buyers?
354
00:15:09,400 --> 00:15:10,880
No.
355
00:15:10,880 --> 00:15:13,040
So who's coming? Channel 4?
The Beeb?
356
00:15:13,040 --> 00:15:14,760
No.
The art channel?
357
00:15:14,760 --> 00:15:16,760
No.
So really, no-one replied?
358
00:15:16,760 --> 00:15:19,480
Well, I want to get it out there!
You know, share it with the world.
359
00:15:19,480 --> 00:15:22,000
Julian, have you considered that,
on the whole,
360
00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:23,600
you might be a tiny bit shit
361
00:15:23,600 --> 00:15:25,720
at knowing what to share
with the world and when?
362
00:15:25,720 --> 00:15:27,600
Actually, Channel 5 will take a look
next week,
363
00:15:27,600 --> 00:15:29,240
once the final cut is finished,
364
00:15:29,240 --> 00:15:32,040
so there is some, sort of, morbid,
car-crash curiosity.
365
00:15:32,040 --> 00:15:35,000
Anyway, news flash -
366
00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:37,480
I have some quite exciting news
to share.
367
00:15:37,480 --> 00:15:39,400
You've reconsidered
working with Sean?
368
00:15:39,400 --> 00:15:40,960
Are you sleeping with Sean?
369
00:15:40,960 --> 00:15:42,560
Actually, don't answer that.
370
00:15:42,560 --> 00:15:45,440
I have realised that, while
there are no original stories,
371
00:15:45,440 --> 00:15:47,320
particularly Sean's,
372
00:15:47,320 --> 00:15:49,240
there is original art
373
00:15:49,240 --> 00:15:53,200
and I have been always -
and still am, actually -
374
00:15:53,200 --> 00:15:55,800
quite an original artist.
375
00:15:55,800 --> 00:15:58,360
Really?
I'm going to have an exhibition!
376
00:15:58,360 --> 00:16:00,040
Oh! Of what?
377
00:16:00,040 --> 00:16:02,160
Of my nudes. The phallum series.
378
00:16:02,160 --> 00:16:04,120
I've got around a dozen of them.
379
00:16:04,120 --> 00:16:05,680
Some of them are unfinished
380
00:16:05,680 --> 00:16:08,360
but anyway, Florence has
this friend who has a gallery...
381
00:16:08,360 --> 00:16:10,440
I'm sorry, but do you...are you...
382
00:16:10,440 --> 00:16:12,960
oh, do you mean those
paintings of Julian?
383
00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:15,040
Yeah but they're not all of Julian.
384
00:16:15,040 --> 00:16:17,920
No, apparently some of the men from
the neighbourhood also feature.
385
00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:19,400
He posed for me, Julian.
386
00:16:19,400 --> 00:16:21,920
It's not like he and I
had a secret child
387
00:16:21,920 --> 00:16:23,800
that I kept hidden for decades.
388
00:16:23,800 --> 00:16:25,840
Yeah. Walked into that, didn't I?
389
00:16:25,840 --> 00:16:27,480
I'm...I'm going... (MUTTERS)
390
00:16:27,480 --> 00:16:29,760
Ingrid, look, I know that
you're a very free woman...
391
00:16:29,760 --> 00:16:33,280
Well, I...I actually am.
Yeah but you know, artists.
392
00:16:33,280 --> 00:16:35,120
Typically hard-off, aren't they?
393
00:16:35,120 --> 00:16:38,040
Yeah but that doesn't apply to me.
I am aware it's a privilege.
394
00:16:38,040 --> 00:16:42,040
Great. But...what are the real
monetisation opportunities?
395
00:16:42,040 --> 00:16:44,800
Heidi, I don't expect you
to understand this
396
00:16:44,800 --> 00:16:48,000
but I'm doing it
kunst fur die kunst -
397
00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:51,760
art for art's sake, for the sheer
wild joy of it.
398
00:16:51,760 --> 00:16:53,240
Happy for you.
399
00:16:53,240 --> 00:16:56,160
Anyway, Florence has got this friend
who's got a gallery in Shoreditch,
400
00:16:56,160 --> 00:16:58,280
E2RT - it's got a slight
mould problem...
401
00:16:58,280 --> 00:17:00,040
Oh, great. Classy. Can't wait.
402
00:17:00,040 --> 00:17:03,160
Which...which is perfect,
'cause it needs to be a bit squalid
403
00:17:03,160 --> 00:17:05,320
for my phoenix-from-the-ashes
moment, you know,
404
00:17:05,320 --> 00:17:07,120
or I'm not gonna be taken seriously.
405
00:17:07,120 --> 00:17:08,720
Yeah. Um, I don't know.
406
00:17:08,720 --> 00:17:11,880
Have you considered what price point
you want to sell these paintings for?
407
00:17:11,880 --> 00:17:14,240
Yeah, Florence says, like,
10 grand each.
408
00:17:15,840 --> 00:17:18,840
Is there room on that phoenix for me,
as soon as I'm not so busy anymore?
409
00:17:18,840 --> 00:17:20,320
(LAUGHS)
410
00:17:20,320 --> 00:17:23,400
Be careful - I'm hot.
Mmm.
411
00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:25,840
Do you like lemonade?
Yeah.
412
00:17:25,840 --> 00:17:27,960
But I prefer it flat.
413
00:17:27,960 --> 00:17:30,000
Oh, my god, me too!
414
00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:32,000
I just like the flavour.
Same here.
415
00:17:33,080 --> 00:17:34,840
Do you sneeze
when you look at the sun?
416
00:17:34,840 --> 00:17:36,600
Sometimes.
417
00:17:36,600 --> 00:17:39,120
OK. How about...
418
00:17:39,120 --> 00:17:41,080
Do you get the hiccups
if you laugh too much?
419
00:17:41,080 --> 00:17:43,760
Actually, that's happened only once
but yes.
420
00:17:43,760 --> 00:17:46,320
This is amazing.
I suppose it could be the genetics.
421
00:17:46,320 --> 00:17:48,400
Oh, do you get the squits
if you drink too much milk?
422
00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:50,280
Uh...no.
423
00:17:50,280 --> 00:17:52,600
I actually happen to love dairy.
Oh.
424
00:17:52,600 --> 00:17:55,400
Particularly cheese.
I must just get that from Mum.
425
00:17:58,440 --> 00:18:00,360
Um, can we have
a bit of schtum, guys?
426
00:18:00,360 --> 00:18:02,760
Guys, can we have
a little bit of...schtum?
427
00:18:02,760 --> 00:18:04,400
Thank you.
428
00:18:04,400 --> 00:18:08,520
Um, it's wonderful to see some of
our favourite faces here today.
429
00:18:08,520 --> 00:18:10,720
Welcome to my film.
Yeah.
430
00:18:10,720 --> 00:18:15,000
Well, uh...my money, my ideas, so
it's probably more my film, really.
431
00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:17,720
(LAUGHS) So sorry, everyone.
432
00:18:17,720 --> 00:18:19,880
We don't have any idea
what we're doing.
433
00:18:19,880 --> 00:18:22,480
We're not actually film-makers.
Well, no, I...I am.
434
00:18:22,480 --> 00:18:24,000
Award-winning, actually.
435
00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:26,400
Like I say, without financing,
what have you got?
436
00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:28,600
My integrity.
Money makes the world go round.
437
00:18:28,600 --> 00:18:32,000
It's, um, wonderful to see
some of our, uh, fave...
438
00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:33,640
Oh, sorry. I've done that bit.
439
00:18:34,840 --> 00:18:36,520
Hello.
440
00:18:37,640 --> 00:18:39,680
S-sorry, Austin - did you
want to say something?
441
00:18:39,680 --> 00:18:41,640
Yeah, I would, if that's alright.
442
00:18:41,640 --> 00:18:43,120
Thanks.
443
00:18:43,120 --> 00:18:45,000
Hello. I'm Austin.
444
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:46,720
I've met three of you already.
445
00:18:46,720 --> 00:18:48,360
I just wanted to say thank you
446
00:18:48,360 --> 00:18:50,920
for coming to support
my dad and stepmother.
447
00:18:50,920 --> 00:18:53,720
Dad has been working very hard
on this documentary
448
00:18:53,720 --> 00:18:55,360
and we hope it will assist him
449
00:18:55,360 --> 00:18:58,360
in being recognised for something
other than re-posting a Nazi,
450
00:18:58,360 --> 00:19:01,160
as he has barely shown any
racist qualities since then.
451
00:19:01,160 --> 00:19:02,760
Thank you so much, Austin.
452
00:19:02,760 --> 00:19:06,080
The best introduction to art
is no introduction to art.
453
00:19:06,080 --> 00:19:09,200
Hear, hear. As a fine artist,
I agree with that.
454
00:19:09,200 --> 00:19:12,360
Be an embryo, ready to evolve.
455
00:19:12,360 --> 00:19:13,880
Empty.
456
00:19:13,880 --> 00:19:17,160
But it is a bit of a myth that
we can ever actually be empty.
457
00:19:17,160 --> 00:19:20,760
I mean, all us are basically full,
aren't we, of blood and ideas...
458
00:19:20,760 --> 00:19:23,520
(OTHERS BEGIN SPEAKING AT ONCE)
..so many of our favourite...
459
00:19:23,520 --> 00:19:26,000
This dynamic isn't working.
Can we please just roll the piece?
460
00:19:26,000 --> 00:19:28,000
Ro... Uh, roll it, please. Yeah.
461
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:29,480
Yep.
462
00:19:29,480 --> 00:19:32,000
(POIGNANT MUSIC PLAYS)
463
00:19:44,880 --> 00:19:46,760
Are you nervous?
464
00:19:48,040 --> 00:19:50,880
AUSTIN: All my life, I have
wondered where I came from.
465
00:19:50,880 --> 00:19:53,440
I was on a quest
to understand my origins
466
00:19:53,440 --> 00:19:55,920
and now I have finally found them.
467
00:19:55,920 --> 00:19:59,600
I am an Englishman
and I am the son of an author.
468
00:19:59,600 --> 00:20:03,000
Separated by thousands of miles.
469
00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:05,440
I didn't even know of his existence.
470
00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:07,200
I love marmalade
471
00:20:07,200 --> 00:20:10,480
and also Marmite,
as long as it's not too strong.
472
00:20:10,480 --> 00:20:13,200
These are two condiments
recognised the world over
473
00:20:13,200 --> 00:20:15,000
for their British heritage
474
00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:18,080
and I hope that I will be
recognised for mine.
475
00:20:18,080 --> 00:20:24,880
We were on a path. Birds were flying
down and...and landing near us.
476
00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:27,560
Before I found my father,
I was stuck.
477
00:20:27,560 --> 00:20:30,280
I wasn't sure how I was gonna fit in
in this world.
478
00:20:30,280 --> 00:20:32,480
There is this thing, when you are,
479
00:20:32,480 --> 00:20:35,040
um...a bit royal
480
00:20:35,040 --> 00:20:37,400
that does kind of mess with your
head, 'cause you're like,
481
00:20:37,400 --> 00:20:39,200
"Well," you know,
"does it mean anything?"
482
00:20:39,200 --> 00:20:42,000
You know, the divine right of kings,
am I different?
483
00:20:42,000 --> 00:20:44,360
I didn't know my father.
484
00:20:44,360 --> 00:20:47,000
I thought that I was
the product of a sperm donor.
485
00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:49,000
He didn't know about me but...
486
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:51,600
you know, I wonder, can you
feel a father's presence,
487
00:20:51,600 --> 00:20:53,360
even when there's absence?
488
00:20:53,360 --> 00:20:55,320
Don't know. Can you?
Is he joking?
489
00:20:55,320 --> 00:20:57,120
I don't know. I hope so.
490
00:20:57,120 --> 00:21:01,480
The sun was shining and the path
was a little bit muddy
491
00:21:01,480 --> 00:21:04,120
but...it was beautiful.
492
00:21:05,320 --> 00:21:07,160
(SIGHS) I wasn't there.
493
00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:10,440
And now I am.
494
00:21:12,160 --> 00:21:14,080
"And now I am."
495
00:21:14,080 --> 00:21:16,960
To be a father,
or to be a good father -
496
00:21:16,960 --> 00:21:21,000
um, I think it's about...balance.
497
00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:22,840
You know, since meeting Austin,
498
00:21:22,840 --> 00:21:25,560
I've had to re-evaluate,
really, everything.
499
00:21:25,560 --> 00:21:28,680
I did eventually come to see
that he's a narcissist
500
00:21:28,680 --> 00:21:30,280
but if somebody is a narcissist,
501
00:21:30,280 --> 00:21:32,640
that means they just have
something to work on.
502
00:21:32,640 --> 00:21:34,600
I've...I've made mistakes.
503
00:21:34,600 --> 00:21:36,240
No shit, Sherlock.
504
00:21:36,240 --> 00:21:38,560
I've lapsed in judgement but...
505
00:21:38,560 --> 00:21:40,400
you know, I'm...
506
00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:43,600
..I think I'm evolving.
507
00:21:45,360 --> 00:21:47,360
Your past does not equal
your future.
508
00:21:48,360 --> 00:21:50,240
That's Tony Robbins.
509
00:21:50,240 --> 00:21:52,080
Shh!
510
00:21:52,080 --> 00:21:53,680
I mean, our entire relationship
511
00:21:53,680 --> 00:21:55,840
was based on the birth
of this fictional creature -
512
00:21:55,840 --> 00:21:58,240
this Big Bear was our firstborn.
513
00:21:58,240 --> 00:22:02,440
What appealed to me most about
Big Bear is that he's adventurous
514
00:22:02,440 --> 00:22:04,960
and he's always trying
to look on the positive side.
515
00:22:04,960 --> 00:22:07,000
And now Julian's...
516
00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:09,760
..effectively killed him.
517
00:22:09,760 --> 00:22:12,080
(FLORENCE LAUGHS)
That's not funny!
518
00:22:12,080 --> 00:22:14,000
Mum, what the hell?
519
00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:16,000
It's not funny!
So much!
520
00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:21,000
And, um...well, I mean, not very
many marriages survive...
521
00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:23,880
..the death of a child,
522
00:22:23,880 --> 00:22:25,520
fictional or...
523
00:22:25,520 --> 00:22:28,520
Well, I mean, they probably do
survive fictional deaths.
524
00:22:30,000 --> 00:22:31,640
Thinking about it.
525
00:22:31,640 --> 00:22:34,000
Julian's a good father...
526
00:22:34,000 --> 00:22:35,920
You look great.
527
00:22:35,920 --> 00:22:39,120
..in that he doesn't try too hard.
528
00:22:39,120 --> 00:22:40,760
I mean, he's best at play.
529
00:22:40,760 --> 00:22:42,560
He is the hero of his own story
530
00:22:42,560 --> 00:22:44,720
and the rest of us
are the supporting cast,
531
00:22:44,720 --> 00:22:46,760
which is...which is fine.
532
00:22:46,760 --> 00:22:53,040
The fool doth think he's a wise man
but the wise man knows he's a fool.
533
00:22:53,040 --> 00:22:54,720
That's definitely Shakespeare.
534
00:22:54,720 --> 00:22:56,800
As You Like It, act V. Touchstone.
535
00:22:59,800 --> 00:23:01,680
(WEEPS)
536
00:23:01,680 --> 00:23:03,680
(HEIDI LAUGHS)
Oh, my god.
537
00:23:03,680 --> 00:23:05,280
(SOBS)
538
00:23:16,000 --> 00:23:17,800
How DID they get it here?
539
00:23:17,800 --> 00:23:19,880
We'll never know. Was it aliens?
540
00:23:19,880 --> 00:23:21,640
Merlin? Giants?
541
00:23:21,640 --> 00:23:24,240
I'll have to go to my grave
wondering.
542
00:23:24,240 --> 00:23:25,760
Drive me mad.
543
00:23:25,760 --> 00:23:28,000
Do you want to get out?
Seems to have eased a bit.
544
00:23:28,000 --> 00:23:29,840
Well, it's too bloody dark now.
545
00:23:29,840 --> 00:23:32,000
(SIGHS) This country!
546
00:23:35,120 --> 00:23:37,440
JULIAN: Fathering is not something
perfect men do.
547
00:23:37,440 --> 00:23:40,200
Fathering perfects the man.
548
00:23:41,240 --> 00:23:43,760
I think that's...was that
William D. Wattles?
549
00:23:43,760 --> 00:23:45,280
I think so.
550
00:23:45,280 --> 00:23:47,240
I...I am a human.
551
00:23:47,240 --> 00:23:50,880
At the end of the day, I am a human.
Yes, I'm a father but I am a human.
552
00:23:50,880 --> 00:23:54,880
We are a family.
553
00:23:54,880 --> 00:23:57,760
Where am I?
Where's Florence?
554
00:23:57,760 --> 00:23:59,440
Dad, that's really hurtful.
555
00:23:59,440 --> 00:24:02,000
Family in metamorphosis.
556
00:24:07,840 --> 00:24:10,160
Oh, my god.
557
00:24:10,160 --> 00:24:12,840
(AUDIENCE APPLAUDS)
558
00:24:15,240 --> 00:24:18,080
Whew! Really takes you
on a journey, doesn't it?
559
00:24:18,080 --> 00:24:20,360
I didn't really like the music.
No?
560
00:24:20,360 --> 00:24:22,080
Well, we can change that.
561
00:24:22,080 --> 00:24:24,880
Very artistic, in an
artistic-licence sort of way.
562
00:24:24,880 --> 00:24:26,240
Thank you.
563
00:24:26,240 --> 00:24:27,960
Why did she do all that filming
564
00:24:27,960 --> 00:24:29,960
if she was only gonna use
you crying on a stool?
565
00:24:29,960 --> 00:24:31,680
It's not finished, though, is it?
No.
566
00:24:31,680 --> 00:24:33,600
No.
OK. So...yeah. I have thoughts.
567
00:24:34,600 --> 00:24:37,480
Congratulations, Julian. It really is
your...Octopus's Garden.
568
00:24:37,480 --> 00:24:39,280
Oh, thank you, Heidi.
569
00:24:39,280 --> 00:24:40,920
I think.
570
00:24:43,000 --> 00:24:44,480
Are you coming?
571
00:24:44,480 --> 00:24:46,320
I'll be there in a minute.
572
00:24:46,320 --> 00:24:48,120
I like to stay for the entire
credit sequence,
573
00:24:48,120 --> 00:24:50,400
out of respect for everyone
who worked on it.
574
00:24:50,400 --> 00:24:53,400
Well, I'll see you out there.
Do you fancy another lemonade?
575
00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:08,560
(SIGHS)
576
00:25:08,560 --> 00:25:10,680
(PHONE RINGS)
577
00:25:10,680 --> 00:25:13,600
Sorry. Uh, Yolanda,
do you mind if I take this?
578
00:25:13,600 --> 00:25:15,080
OK.
579
00:25:16,160 --> 00:25:18,160
Heidi! Hi. Yeah.
580
00:25:18,160 --> 00:25:20,160
No, no. It's fine. We've had to...
581
00:25:20,160 --> 00:25:22,040
It's a lot of noise from the rain.
582
00:25:22,040 --> 00:25:23,920
Yeah. Austin?
583
00:25:23,920 --> 00:25:26,000
Yeah, no, he's...he's doing
really well. Yeah.
584
00:25:26,000 --> 00:25:30,160
He's playing ball. Yep.
Um... (LAUGHS)
585
00:25:30,160 --> 00:25:32,000
No, I don't really see it, myself.
586
00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:34,600
No, he's nothing like me.
Absolutely nothing like me.
587
00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:37,080
Mind you, we haven't had
the results of the DNA test yet,
588
00:25:37,080 --> 00:25:39,200
so maybe he isn't my son after all.
(CHUCKLES)
589
00:25:39,200 --> 00:25:40,720
Yeah.
590
00:25:40,720 --> 00:25:42,600
Good for PR, though, right?
591
00:25:42,600 --> 00:25:44,400
Yeah. (LAUGHS)
592
00:25:45,400 --> 00:25:47,240
OK. Yep. Yep.
593
00:25:47,240 --> 00:25:49,640
Austin...
(ON SCREEN) Absolutely. Yeah.
594
00:25:49,640 --> 00:25:51,280
Righto. Yep...
595
00:25:56,000 --> 00:25:57,840
Wait!
596
00:26:02,400 --> 00:26:05,400
Captions by Red Bee Media
597
00:26:08,000 --> 00:26:11,000
Copyright
Australian Broadcasting Corporation
598
00:26:12,960 --> 00:26:14,560
I'm just trying to get a handle
599
00:26:14,560 --> 00:26:16,680
on how many times a father
can lose his son in a week.
600
00:26:16,680 --> 00:26:18,760
He's gone exploring.
He wanted some space.
601
00:26:18,760 --> 00:26:21,760
I'm actually writing a book about
how the English use English.
602
00:26:21,760 --> 00:26:23,600
And what are your findings?
603
00:26:23,600 --> 00:26:25,600
That the English misuse English,
of course.
604
00:26:25,600 --> 00:26:27,960
Your paintings have been hung
and they look amazing.
605
00:26:27,960 --> 00:26:30,720
So my paintings are not just
well hung - they are also hung well.
606
00:26:30,720 --> 00:26:32,640
Is that a penis joke?
Yeah.
607
00:26:32,640 --> 00:26:34,960
I'm a writer too but
the, uh, journalist kind.
608
00:26:34,960 --> 00:26:36,440
Cool!
609
00:26:36,440 --> 00:26:38,880
I have some big news - I met a woman.
Oh!
47146
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