All language subtitles for The.Drew.Carey.Show.S01E03.The.Joining.of.Two.Unlike.Elements.is.a.Mixture-ing

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,969 --> 00:00:03,202 OH, IT'S FROM DREW. 2 00:00:04,438 --> 00:00:06,350 IT'S A... 3 00:00:06,374 --> 00:00:08,785 PBS TOTE BAG. 4 00:00:08,809 --> 00:00:09,853 OH, NICE, DREW. 5 00:00:09,877 --> 00:00:12,822 YOU GET THAT FREE FOR THE MINIMUM DONATION. 6 00:00:12,846 --> 00:00:15,381 NO, YOU GET THAT WHEN YOU BUY THE WATCH. 7 00:00:16,984 --> 00:00:19,796 HEY, I GOT THE THREE TENORS. 8 00:00:19,820 --> 00:00:21,965 I DIDN'T KNOW THAT WAS IN THERE. GIMME THAT. 9 00:00:21,989 --> 00:00:25,035 I MEAN, UH, CONGRATULATIONS. 10 00:00:25,059 --> 00:00:27,371 JUST A LITTLE SOMETHING FOR YOUR HONEYMOON. 11 00:00:27,395 --> 00:00:29,172 IF YOU WORK UP AN APPETITE, IT'S EDIBLE. 12 00:00:29,196 --> 00:00:31,276 YEAH. THERE'S A BITE MISSING. 13 00:00:34,235 --> 00:00:36,179 THIS ONE GOT SEPARATED FROM THE GIFT. 14 00:00:36,203 --> 00:00:38,315 I'M STILL LOOKING FOR IT. 15 00:00:38,339 --> 00:00:39,349 IT'S FROM KATE. 16 00:00:39,373 --> 00:00:40,950 WELL, WHEREVER IT IS, THANKS, KATE. 17 00:00:40,974 --> 00:00:42,552 MY PLEASURE. CONGRATULATIONS. 18 00:00:43,677 --> 00:00:45,855 WHAT DID YOU, UH... WHAT DID YOU GET HER? 19 00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:48,414 A CARD WITH A PIECE OF WRAPPING PAPER TAPED TO THE BACK. 20 00:00:50,384 --> 00:00:52,662 WOW. NEXT OFFICE PARTY, 21 00:00:52,686 --> 00:00:53,863 I'M GOING IN ON A GIFT WITH YOU. 22 00:00:53,887 --> 00:00:55,865 HEY, IT'S MY FIFTH WEDDING SHOWER THIS MONTH 23 00:00:55,889 --> 00:00:57,334 FOR SOMEONE I BARELY KNOW. 24 00:00:57,358 --> 00:00:58,868 WHERE'S THE PARTY FOR SINGLE PEOPLE? 25 00:00:58,892 --> 00:01:00,504 JUST ONCE, I'D LIKE TO BLOW OUT THE CANDLES 26 00:01:00,528 --> 00:01:02,072 ON A "YES, I'M NOT PREGNANT" CAKE. 27 00:01:02,096 --> 00:01:03,473 EASY, KATE. MIGHT WANT TO SAVE 28 00:01:03,497 --> 00:01:05,737 SOME OF THAT BITTERNESS FOR YOUR FORTIES. 29 00:01:06,367 --> 00:01:07,377 DREW, CAN I TALK TO YOU? 30 00:01:07,401 --> 00:01:08,512 I WAS JUST GOING. 31 00:01:08,536 --> 00:01:09,812 KATE, YOU KNOW, I COULD NEVER FIND 32 00:01:09,836 --> 00:01:11,548 THAT GIFT YOU GAVE ME FOR MY BABY SHOWER. 33 00:01:11,572 --> 00:01:15,285 OH. IT WAS THAT THING THEY JUMP, 34 00:01:15,309 --> 00:01:17,429 YOU KNOW, WALK... RUN... EAT IN. THE TOY. 35 00:01:19,046 --> 00:01:20,290 OH... RIGHT. 36 00:01:20,314 --> 00:01:21,746 THANKS. 37 00:01:23,050 --> 00:01:24,661 SO, WHAT, BUDDY? HOW YOU DOING? 38 00:01:24,685 --> 00:01:26,629 YOU GOTTA FIRE ME. 39 00:01:26,653 --> 00:01:28,631 WHAT? 40 00:01:28,655 --> 00:01:31,134 LOOK, MY WIFE'S EXPECTING ANY DAY NOW, 41 00:01:31,158 --> 00:01:32,269 AND I'D LOVE TO SPEND SOME TIME 42 00:01:32,293 --> 00:01:33,537 WITH HER AND THE BABY. 43 00:01:33,561 --> 00:01:35,772 WE BOTH KNOW I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE WITH THIS JOB. 44 00:01:35,796 --> 00:01:38,530 I MEAN, HOW LONG CAN A GUY STAY IN WOMEN'S SHOES? 45 00:01:39,933 --> 00:01:42,112 HA HA HA. 46 00:01:42,136 --> 00:01:43,947 ANYWAY, THE ONLY WAY I COULD AFFORD TO DO THIS 47 00:01:43,971 --> 00:01:45,648 IS BY COLLECTING UNEMPLOYMENT. 48 00:01:45,672 --> 00:01:46,683 THAT'D BE GREAT. YOU COULD SHOW UP 49 00:01:46,707 --> 00:01:47,684 FOR YOUR KID'S CAREER DAY 50 00:01:47,708 --> 00:01:50,653 WITH A BEER AND A TV GUIDE. 51 00:01:50,677 --> 00:01:51,854 HEY, IF THE STORE HAD PATERNITY LEAVE, 52 00:01:51,878 --> 00:01:53,823 I WOULDN'T HAVE TO ASK YOU FOR THIS. 53 00:01:53,847 --> 00:01:55,058 SO WHAT DO YOU SAY? 54 00:01:55,082 --> 00:01:56,926 I DON'T KNOW. THIS IS WEIRD. 55 00:01:56,950 --> 00:01:58,462 NOBODY EVER ASKED TO BE FIRED BEFORE. 56 00:01:58,486 --> 00:02:00,430 ONE GUY WANTED TO BE CHASTISED AT OFFICE MEETINGS, 57 00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:02,832 BUT, YOU KNOW, GO DEAL WITH THAT. 58 00:02:02,856 --> 00:02:05,757 COME ON, DREW. I'D FIRE YOU IN A HEARTBEAT. 59 00:02:07,361 --> 00:02:08,371 THERE'S RULES, MAN. 60 00:02:08,395 --> 00:02:09,806 I COULD GET IN TROUBLE FOR THIS. 61 00:02:09,830 --> 00:02:11,874 I JUST CAN'T GO FIRING PEOPLE WILLY-NILLY. 62 00:02:11,898 --> 00:02:12,875 EENIE, MEENIE, MINEY, MO... 63 00:02:12,899 --> 00:02:14,777 YOU'RE FIRED! 64 00:02:14,801 --> 00:02:16,413 HOW ABOUT IF I HAD A BAD ATTITUDE? 65 00:02:16,437 --> 00:02:18,337 HEY, THE HECK WITH YOU, BUDDY! 66 00:02:22,209 --> 00:02:23,209 HOW'S THAT? 67 00:02:24,512 --> 00:02:25,522 OH, MAN. 68 00:02:25,546 --> 00:02:29,192 LOOK, I'LL FIRE YOU FOR THE KID. 69 00:02:29,216 --> 00:02:30,827 WHAT IF I JUST PUT DOWN, UH, 70 00:02:30,851 --> 00:02:32,829 I DON'T KNOW, INCOMPETENCE? 71 00:02:32,853 --> 00:02:35,064 THANKS. 72 00:02:35,088 --> 00:02:36,366 WHEN DID YOU HAVE LONG HAIR? 73 00:02:36,390 --> 00:02:38,023 THAT'S MY MOTHER. 74 00:02:41,595 --> 00:02:42,772 BETTER WATCH IT, PAL. 75 00:02:42,796 --> 00:02:45,742 YOU'RE THIS CLOSE TO GETTING YOUR JOB BACK. 76 00:02:45,766 --> 00:02:47,611 CONGRATULATIONS, ED. 77 00:02:47,635 --> 00:02:48,645 YOU'RE FIRED. 78 00:02:48,669 --> 00:02:50,380 FIRED. ALL RIGHT. 79 00:02:50,404 --> 00:02:51,404 WAIT TILL I TELL MY WIFE. 80 00:02:52,706 --> 00:02:53,683 WAIT. THERE'S MORE. 81 00:02:53,707 --> 00:02:55,907 YOU ONLY GOT SIX MONTHS TO LIVE. 82 00:02:58,179 --> 00:03:02,292 ♪ MOON OVER PARMA, BRING MY LOVE TO ME TONIGHT ♪ 83 00:03:02,316 --> 00:03:03,627 ♪ GUIDE HER TO CLEVELAND ♪ 84 00:03:03,651 --> 00:03:06,429 ♪ UNDERNEATH YOUR SILVERY LIGHT ♪ 85 00:03:06,453 --> 00:03:08,365 ♪ WE'RE GOIN' BOWLIN' ♪ 86 00:03:08,389 --> 00:03:10,433 ♪ SO DON'T LOSE HER IN SOLON ♪ 87 00:03:10,457 --> 00:03:12,068 ♪ MOON OVER PARMA, TONIGHT ♪ 88 00:03:12,092 --> 00:03:14,560 CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS. 89 00:03:16,463 --> 00:03:17,440 ♪ THAT'S THE WAY, UH-HUH, UH... ♪ 90 00:03:17,464 --> 00:03:18,441 WHOO. 91 00:03:18,465 --> 00:03:20,143 ♪ I LIKE IT, UH-HUH, UH-HUH ♪ 92 00:03:20,167 --> 00:03:21,645 ♪ THAT'S THE WAY, UH-HUH, UH-HUH ♪ 93 00:03:21,669 --> 00:03:23,045 WHOO! 94 00:03:23,069 --> 00:03:25,114 ♪ I LIKE IT, UH-HUH, UH-HUH ♪ 95 00:03:25,138 --> 00:03:26,305 WOW. FUZZY JELL-O. 96 00:03:27,874 --> 00:03:29,619 ♪ DO A LITTLE DANCE, UHH, UHH ♪ 97 00:03:29,643 --> 00:03:31,187 ♪ MAKE A LITTLE LOVE, UHH, UHH ♪ 98 00:03:31,211 --> 00:03:33,022 ♪ GET DOWN TONIGHT, UHH, UHH ♪ 99 00:03:33,046 --> 00:03:34,691 ♪ GET DOWN TONIGHT, OH ♪ 100 00:03:34,715 --> 00:03:36,593 ♪ DO A LITTLE DANCE, UHH, UHH ♪ 101 00:03:36,617 --> 00:03:38,194 ♪ MAKE A LITTLE LOVE, UHH, UHH ♪ 102 00:03:38,218 --> 00:03:39,929 ♪ GET DOWN TONIGHT, UHH, UHH ♪ 103 00:03:39,953 --> 00:03:41,564 ♪ GET DOWN TONIGHT ♪ 104 00:03:41,588 --> 00:03:42,588 AAH! 105 00:03:44,358 --> 00:03:46,336 JULES! 106 00:03:46,360 --> 00:03:47,771 JULES! 107 00:03:47,795 --> 00:03:49,361 HEY, BUDDY. 108 00:03:50,798 --> 00:03:53,410 YOU DON'T FLY, DO YOU? 109 00:03:53,434 --> 00:03:56,680 DIDN'T I FLUSH YOU DOWN THE TOILET 30 YEARS AGO? 110 00:03:56,704 --> 00:03:58,537 WHAT IS IT, DREW BUDDY? 111 00:03:59,740 --> 00:04:02,218 I BELIEVE THIS BELONGS TO YOU. 112 00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:03,219 OH, MAN. 113 00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:05,322 HARLEY. HARLEY. 114 00:04:05,346 --> 00:04:07,957 GO HOME. 115 00:04:07,981 --> 00:04:09,459 HOME. 116 00:04:09,483 --> 00:04:10,460 HARLEY... 117 00:04:10,484 --> 00:04:11,961 HOME. 118 00:04:11,985 --> 00:04:13,396 MAN, IS HE STUBBORN. 119 00:04:13,420 --> 00:04:14,831 THAT'S THE THIRD TIME THIS WEEK! 120 00:04:14,855 --> 00:04:16,399 YOU SAID YOU WERE GONNA GET A CAGE FOR HIM. 121 00:04:16,423 --> 00:04:18,267 YOU KNOW, DREW... 122 00:04:18,291 --> 00:04:20,726 WE TRY TO BE GOOD NEIGHBORS... 123 00:04:24,064 --> 00:04:25,041 BUT YOU KNOW, IT'S LIKE 124 00:04:25,065 --> 00:04:26,810 YOU GET RATTLED OVER EVERY LITTLE THING. 125 00:04:26,834 --> 00:04:30,146 I GOT A 6-FOOT LIZARD ON MY POOL TABLE! 126 00:04:30,170 --> 00:04:32,382 WHAT KIND OF WEIRDO 127 00:04:32,406 --> 00:04:33,850 PUTS A POOL TABLE OUTSIDE? 128 00:04:33,874 --> 00:04:37,854 THAT'S JUST ASKING FOR LIZARDS. 129 00:04:37,878 --> 00:04:39,578 I'M SORRY, JULES. I'LL KEEP THAT IN MIND. 130 00:04:42,583 --> 00:04:43,960 WHATEVER HAPPENED TO NORMAL PETS 131 00:04:43,984 --> 00:04:46,329 LIKE HAMSTERS AND BATS? 132 00:04:49,423 --> 00:04:51,534 Kate, yelling: HELP! OPEN UP! 133 00:04:51,558 --> 00:04:52,769 Oswald: NOW, GO! ECCH! 134 00:04:52,793 --> 00:04:54,437 Kate: OH! ECCH! UGH! JEEZ. 135 00:04:54,461 --> 00:04:55,972 GOD! UGH. UHH! 136 00:04:55,996 --> 00:04:57,474 HEY, JULES! 137 00:04:57,498 --> 00:05:00,899 TELL YOUR MONKEY TO QUIT WHIPPING HIS CRAP AT MY FRIENDS! 138 00:05:04,872 --> 00:05:07,472 IT'S LIKE LIVING IN A HITCHCOCK MOVIE, THIS DAMN HOUSE. 139 00:05:09,009 --> 00:05:11,721 SO, WHAT DO YOU GUYS WANT TO SEE TONIGHT? 140 00:05:11,745 --> 00:05:14,557 ANYTHING BUT ROMANCE OR PAULY SHORE. 141 00:05:14,581 --> 00:05:16,058 I DON'T GET IT. 142 00:05:16,082 --> 00:05:18,094 WHAT'S WRONG WITH ROMANCE? 143 00:05:18,118 --> 00:05:19,095 NOTHING'S WRONG WITH ROMANCE. 144 00:05:19,119 --> 00:05:20,930 I'LL SEE A ROMANTIC MOVIE 145 00:05:20,954 --> 00:05:22,031 AS LONG AS THERE'S BLOOD 146 00:05:22,055 --> 00:05:24,300 AND EVERYBODY GETS BLOWN UP AT THE END. 147 00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:26,803 LET'S SEE. WE GOT A COUPLE OF CHOICES HERE THEN... 148 00:05:26,827 --> 00:05:28,304 HEADLESS IN SEATTLE 149 00:05:28,328 --> 00:05:31,908 OR THE WAY WE WERE BEFORE YOU BLEW US UP. 150 00:05:31,932 --> 00:05:34,511 WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU? 151 00:05:34,535 --> 00:05:36,012 I'M SORRY. I JUST CAN'T STOP THINKING 152 00:05:36,036 --> 00:05:37,614 ABOUT THAT PARTY THIS MORNING. 153 00:05:37,638 --> 00:05:39,115 MOST OF THE GIRLS I WENT TO SCHOOL WITH 154 00:05:39,139 --> 00:05:40,750 ARE EITHER MARRIED OR GETTING MARRIED. 155 00:05:40,774 --> 00:05:42,985 AND I GUESS IT'S STARTING TO KIND OF BUG ME. 156 00:05:43,009 --> 00:05:44,153 MOST OF THE GUYS I WENT TO SCHOOL WITH 157 00:05:44,177 --> 00:05:45,288 ARE EITHER FAT OR GETTING FAT. 158 00:05:45,312 --> 00:05:46,912 YOU DON'T SEE ME CRYING ABOUT IT. 159 00:05:48,816 --> 00:05:50,048 CARRY ON. 160 00:05:51,452 --> 00:05:52,796 I DON'T THINK THERE'S ANY SPECIAL AGE 161 00:05:52,820 --> 00:05:54,163 YOU HAVE TO GET MARRIED. 162 00:05:54,187 --> 00:05:55,732 I MEAN, I THINK IT'S WHEN YOU MEET THE RIGHT PERSON. 163 00:05:55,756 --> 00:05:57,033 YOU KNOW? 164 00:05:57,057 --> 00:06:00,470 I MEAN, 50% OF ALL MARRIAGES IN AMERICA END IN FAILURE. 165 00:06:00,494 --> 00:06:02,772 A PERSON GETS HIT BY A CAR EVERY 10 MINUTES. 166 00:06:02,796 --> 00:06:07,209 2 1/2 ACRES OF RAIN FOREST DISAPPEAR EVERY SECOND. 167 00:06:07,233 --> 00:06:09,245 WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY? 168 00:06:09,269 --> 00:06:12,315 I GOT TO STOP SLEEPING WITH THE TV ON. 169 00:06:12,339 --> 00:06:14,551 COME ON. YOU COULD GET A HUSBAND LIKE THAT. 170 00:06:14,575 --> 00:06:15,652 YEAH. PLEASE. 171 00:06:15,676 --> 00:06:17,153 I DON'T NEED A HUSBAND. 172 00:06:17,177 --> 00:06:18,977 I JUST WANT A WEDDING. 173 00:06:20,080 --> 00:06:21,057 I DON'T WANT A HUSBAND EITHER. 174 00:06:21,081 --> 00:06:22,559 I JUST WANT SOMEONE TO APPRECIATE 175 00:06:22,583 --> 00:06:24,594 HOW HARD I WORK AROUND THIS HOUSE. 176 00:06:24,618 --> 00:06:25,595 OHH. 177 00:06:25,619 --> 00:06:28,264 YOU GUYS DON'T GET IT. 178 00:06:28,288 --> 00:06:29,432 WHEN I WAS A LITTLE GIRL, 179 00:06:29,456 --> 00:06:32,836 I SAW MYSELF GETTING MARRIED IN A BIG CHURCH 180 00:06:32,860 --> 00:06:34,403 FILLED WITH BEAUTIFUL FLOWERS, 181 00:06:34,427 --> 00:06:36,138 WEARING A WHITE WEDDING DRESS, 182 00:06:36,162 --> 00:06:39,241 AND I SAW MYSELF AT THE ALTAR 183 00:06:39,265 --> 00:06:42,411 NEXT TO, UM, DAVID CASSIDY. 184 00:06:42,435 --> 00:06:44,848 KATE, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT. 185 00:06:44,872 --> 00:06:46,349 I MEAN, LOOK AT THE BRIDE OF FRANKENSTEIN. 186 00:06:46,373 --> 00:06:48,417 SHE GOT MARRIED AFTER SHE WAS DEAD. 187 00:06:48,441 --> 00:06:49,908 THERE'S STILL HOPE FOR YOU. 188 00:06:51,111 --> 00:06:53,690 HUH? YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU'RE RIGHT. 189 00:06:53,714 --> 00:06:54,958 HERE I AM, SITTING WITH MY FRIENDS 190 00:06:54,982 --> 00:06:55,959 FEELING SORRY FOR MYSELF. 191 00:06:55,983 --> 00:06:56,960 MM-HMM. 192 00:06:56,984 --> 00:06:57,961 I COULD DO THIS AT HOME. 193 00:06:57,985 --> 00:06:59,625 SURE. BYE. 194 00:07:00,721 --> 00:07:01,881 AW, KATE. 195 00:07:03,289 --> 00:07:05,434 HEY, UH, YOU SURE YOU'RE OK? 196 00:07:05,458 --> 00:07:06,703 YEAH, I'M FINE. 197 00:07:06,727 --> 00:07:08,137 IF YOU WANT, YOU CAN TAKE MY RAINCOAT. 198 00:07:08,161 --> 00:07:10,540 YOU KNOW, IN CASE BOBO HAD A BIG BREAKFAST. 199 00:07:10,564 --> 00:07:12,909 THANKS. 200 00:07:12,933 --> 00:07:14,043 BOY, SHE'S REALLY OUT OF HER MIND 201 00:07:14,067 --> 00:07:15,277 WITH THIS WHOLE WEDDING THING. 202 00:07:15,301 --> 00:07:17,380 I MEAN, I WANT TO GET MARRIED... 203 00:07:17,404 --> 00:07:18,815 IN THEORY. 204 00:07:18,839 --> 00:07:20,884 YOU KNOW, WE ALL WANT TO GET MARRIED IN A PERFECT WORLD. 205 00:07:20,908 --> 00:07:21,951 HEH HEH HEH. 206 00:07:21,975 --> 00:07:23,386 MARRIAGE IS GREAT... 207 00:07:23,410 --> 00:07:25,243 HYPOTHETICALLY. 208 00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:27,957 WE'RE ALL SCARED, KID. 209 00:07:27,981 --> 00:07:31,728 ANYBODY WHO SAYS DIFFERENT'S A DAMN LIAR. 210 00:07:31,752 --> 00:07:33,362 HOO-HOO. HOO-HOO. 211 00:07:33,386 --> 00:07:35,598 HOO-HOO. HOO-HOO. 212 00:07:35,622 --> 00:07:38,100 STOP THAT. YOU'RE FREAKING ME OUT. 213 00:07:38,124 --> 00:07:40,670 I'M TALKING ABOUT KATE HERE. 214 00:07:40,694 --> 00:07:43,006 OH, SHE'S JUST FREAKED OUT ABOUT THE CEREMONY. 215 00:07:43,030 --> 00:07:45,174 I DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT THE CEREMONY, 216 00:07:45,198 --> 00:07:46,576 YOU KNOW, EXCEPT WHEN I WAS DATING JACKIE. 217 00:07:46,600 --> 00:07:47,744 WE DID ACTUALLY TALK ABOUT GETTING MARRIED 218 00:07:47,768 --> 00:07:49,679 IN THE FLOWER GARDEN IN HER PARENTS' BACKYARD. 219 00:07:49,703 --> 00:07:50,947 AND THEN YOU KNOW, 220 00:07:50,971 --> 00:07:52,515 LATER ON WHEN WE COULD AFFORD IT, 221 00:07:52,539 --> 00:07:55,852 WE'D HAVE A REAL CEREMONY IN VEGAS. 222 00:07:55,876 --> 00:07:58,287 YOU KNOW, ELVIS IMPERSONATOR, 223 00:07:58,311 --> 00:08:00,189 THE WHOLE SHEBANG. 224 00:08:00,213 --> 00:08:02,592 MAN, BETWEEN YOU AND KATE, YOU TWO SHOULD GET MARRIED. 225 00:08:02,616 --> 00:08:04,427 HEY, YOU KNOW, WHEN I WAS IN COLLEGE, 226 00:08:04,451 --> 00:08:05,762 THERE WAS THIS FRATERNITY 227 00:08:05,786 --> 00:08:08,064 THAT USED TO DO THIS SHOTGUN WEDDING PARTY EVERY SPRING. 228 00:08:08,088 --> 00:08:09,098 MAN, I'M TELLING YOU, IT WAS HUGE. 229 00:08:09,122 --> 00:08:11,100 IT WAS LIKE A BIG GAG CEREMONY. 230 00:08:11,124 --> 00:08:12,268 KATE WOULD BE THE CENTER OF ATTENTION. 231 00:08:12,292 --> 00:08:13,269 BOY, SHE'D LOVE IT. 232 00:08:13,293 --> 00:08:14,403 THAT'S PERFECT. 233 00:08:14,427 --> 00:08:15,939 THAT COULD REALLY CHEER KATE RIGHT UP. 234 00:08:15,963 --> 00:08:17,941 OK. ALL WE NEED IS A WEDDING DRESS, 235 00:08:17,965 --> 00:08:19,576 SOME HANDCUFFS, AND SOME FLOWERS. 236 00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:21,833 HEY! I GOT ALL THAT STUFF IN MY TRUNK. 237 00:08:23,369 --> 00:08:24,948 AND DREW, AS THE LUCKY GROOM, 238 00:08:24,972 --> 00:08:26,849 YOU GET TO PROVIDE YOUR OWN TUX. 239 00:08:26,873 --> 00:08:29,852 OH, MAN. MAYBE I COULD FIT INTO MY PROM TUX. 240 00:08:29,876 --> 00:08:32,176 I'D LIKE TO WEAR IT ONCE. 241 00:08:41,855 --> 00:08:42,832 HI, MIMI. 242 00:08:42,856 --> 00:08:44,155 HI, PIG. 243 00:08:48,161 --> 00:08:49,305 DING-DING-DING-DING-DING. 244 00:08:49,329 --> 00:08:50,629 "HI, PIG." 245 00:08:56,269 --> 00:08:57,714 DREW, YOU GOT A MINUTE? 246 00:08:57,738 --> 00:08:59,782 ED, YOU NEW DAD YOU. 247 00:08:59,806 --> 00:09:01,317 DON'T TELL ME. BABY PICTURES. 248 00:09:01,341 --> 00:09:02,418 HEY, CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF THOSE. 249 00:09:02,442 --> 00:09:03,419 'CAUSE YOU KNOW, 250 00:09:03,443 --> 00:09:04,954 BABIES LOOK SO DIFFERENT. 251 00:09:04,978 --> 00:09:06,522 NO PICTURES, DREW. I GOT A PROBLEM. 252 00:09:06,546 --> 00:09:07,690 WELL, YOU KNOW, IF YOU'RE HAVING ANY TROUBLE 253 00:09:07,714 --> 00:09:08,691 COMING UP WITH A NAME, 254 00:09:08,715 --> 00:09:10,860 I, UH... I DID FIRE YOU, YOU KNOW. 255 00:09:10,884 --> 00:09:12,629 WE GAVE HIM A NAME... CHAN, 256 00:09:12,653 --> 00:09:15,098 AFTER THE GUY MY WIFE HAD AN AFFAIR WITH. 257 00:09:15,122 --> 00:09:16,132 WHAT? 258 00:09:16,156 --> 00:09:17,399 THE BABY'S CHINESE. 259 00:09:17,423 --> 00:09:19,002 AND YOUR WIFE ISN'T? 260 00:09:19,026 --> 00:09:22,505 ARE YOU KIDDING? SHE WON'T EVEN EAT MANDARIN ORANGES. 261 00:09:22,529 --> 00:09:24,674 ED, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY. 262 00:09:24,698 --> 00:09:26,843 THIS IS UNBELIEVABLE. 263 00:09:26,867 --> 00:09:28,144 I WISH THERE WAS SOMETHING I COULD DO. 264 00:09:28,168 --> 00:09:29,746 GIVE ME MY JOB BACK. 265 00:09:29,770 --> 00:09:31,180 WHOA, ED, EVEN IF I WANTED TO, 266 00:09:31,204 --> 00:09:32,949 THE POSITION'S ALREADY BEEN FILLED. 267 00:09:32,973 --> 00:09:35,018 IT'S BEEN LESS THAN A WEEK. WHO'D YOU HIRE? 268 00:09:35,042 --> 00:09:38,442 OH... SOME GUY NAMED WONG. 269 00:09:40,013 --> 00:09:41,557 ANYWAY, I'D LOVE TO HELP YOU, 270 00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:43,860 BUT I PUT MY BUTT ON THE LINE FOR YOU THE FIRST TIME. 271 00:09:43,884 --> 00:09:45,895 I JUST CAN'T GO BACK THERE AND UNDO IT. 272 00:09:45,919 --> 00:09:48,264 FINE, MR. RULES GUY. IF YOU NEED ME, 273 00:09:48,288 --> 00:09:49,899 I'LL BE LIVING IN A CARDBOARD BOX. 274 00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:52,201 IF I'M NOT THERE, TRY THE GUN SHOP. 275 00:09:52,225 --> 00:09:54,025 AFTER THAT, JUST WATCH THE NEWS. 276 00:09:55,162 --> 00:09:56,539 WHOA. HEY, WAIT A MINUTE. 277 00:09:56,563 --> 00:09:57,707 I'LL SEE WHAT I CAN DO. 278 00:09:57,731 --> 00:09:59,008 NO PROMISES, OK, BUT I'LL... 279 00:09:59,032 --> 00:10:02,045 LOOK, I SPEND A LOT OF TIME 280 00:10:02,069 --> 00:10:03,512 TALKING TO MY EMPLOYEES ABOUT THEIR PROBLEMS, 281 00:10:03,536 --> 00:10:04,881 AND WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU 282 00:10:04,905 --> 00:10:06,115 ISN'T SO OUT OF THE ORDINARY. 283 00:10:06,139 --> 00:10:07,283 I MEAN, SURE, 284 00:10:07,307 --> 00:10:08,885 YOU GAVE UP A JOB YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO 285 00:10:08,909 --> 00:10:11,149 AND YOUR WIFE HAD SOMEBODY ELSE'S BABY... 286 00:10:12,079 --> 00:10:14,360 WELL, WE'LL SEE YOU AROUND, BUDDY. 287 00:10:17,417 --> 00:10:18,527 HEY. SO WHERE'S KATE? 288 00:10:18,551 --> 00:10:19,829 MAN, THIS IS GOING TO BE GREAT. 289 00:10:19,853 --> 00:10:21,330 SHE'S IN THE BRIDAL DEPARTMENT 290 00:10:21,354 --> 00:10:22,832 PUTTING ON THE DRESS. 291 00:10:22,856 --> 00:10:25,334 SHE THINKS I'M DRIVING HER TO A CATALOG PHOTO SHOOT. 292 00:10:25,358 --> 00:10:26,869 HOW'D YOU GET THE DRESS? 293 00:10:26,893 --> 00:10:28,671 THE SAME WAY I GOT THE BIG-SCREEN TV 294 00:10:28,695 --> 00:10:30,455 FOR WHEN SAVED BY THE BELL WENT TO FRANCE... 295 00:10:32,365 --> 00:10:33,375 I BOUGHT IT, 296 00:10:33,399 --> 00:10:34,766 AND I'M TAKING IT BACK TOMORROW. 297 00:10:36,469 --> 00:10:37,714 OH, HELLO. 298 00:10:39,139 --> 00:10:40,482 DIVE, DIVE. 299 00:10:40,506 --> 00:10:43,086 CHECK YOU OUT, BABY. WHOO! 300 00:10:43,110 --> 00:10:45,088 I'M SO LUCKY THAT MODEL GOT SICK. 301 00:10:45,112 --> 00:10:46,255 THAT WILL TEACH HER 302 00:10:46,279 --> 00:10:48,159 TO EAT TWICE IN ONE DAY. 303 00:10:49,049 --> 00:10:51,282 WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING HERE? 304 00:10:53,486 --> 00:10:54,964 WE'RE MODELING, TOO. YEAH. 305 00:10:54,988 --> 00:10:57,566 WE'RE GOING TO BE, UH... 306 00:10:57,590 --> 00:10:59,401 WE'RE, UH... 307 00:10:59,425 --> 00:11:02,605 WHAT ARE WE GOING TO BE, OSWALD? 308 00:11:02,629 --> 00:11:03,639 BEARS. BEARS. 309 00:11:03,663 --> 00:11:06,642 WAIT A S... WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 310 00:11:06,666 --> 00:11:09,378 OH! PUT ME DOWN! KNOCK IT OFF! 311 00:11:09,402 --> 00:11:12,522 OH! I'VE REALLY GOT TO GET SOME GIRLFRIENDS. 312 00:11:27,554 --> 00:11:29,131 ALL RISE. 313 00:11:32,058 --> 00:11:34,069 BOY, AM I GLAD I DIDN'T TELL YOU GUYS 314 00:11:34,093 --> 00:11:36,371 I WANTED A BABY. 315 00:11:36,395 --> 00:11:37,640 WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT? 316 00:11:37,664 --> 00:11:39,107 YOU NEVER SAW A BRIDE IN HANDCUFFS 317 00:11:39,131 --> 00:11:40,843 WALK DOWN THE AISLE TO POLKA MUSIC BEFORE? 318 00:11:40,867 --> 00:11:42,845 WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN? 319 00:11:42,869 --> 00:11:44,309 HEY, LOOK AT ME! I'M GETTING MARRIED! 320 00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:47,950 BEFORE WE BEGIN, ONE QUICK ANNOUNCEMENT... 321 00:11:47,974 --> 00:11:49,351 THE HAPPY COUPLE HAS MADE THEIR SELECTIONS 322 00:11:49,375 --> 00:11:51,219 IN THE WARSAW TAVERN BRIDAL REGISTRY. 323 00:11:51,243 --> 00:11:52,788 NOTHING IN CANS, BOTTLES ONLY. 324 00:11:52,812 --> 00:11:55,157 ALSO, IF ANYONE'S INTERESTED IN AN '84 FORD ESCORT, 325 00:11:55,181 --> 00:11:57,827 SEE ME AFTER. PADRE. 326 00:11:57,851 --> 00:11:59,094 THANK YOU. 327 00:11:59,118 --> 00:12:01,964 MARRIAGE... THE FINAL FRONTIER. 328 00:12:01,988 --> 00:12:03,466 WE ARE GATHERED HERE 329 00:12:03,490 --> 00:12:06,902 NOT ONLY TO WITNESS THE HUMILIATION OF OUR FRIEND KATE, 330 00:12:06,926 --> 00:12:08,904 BUT HOPEFULLY SELL A CAR 331 00:12:08,928 --> 00:12:11,006 AND, WHO KNOWS, MAYBE A USED SNOW BLOWER. 332 00:12:11,030 --> 00:12:13,375 50 BUCKS. CLEAN. Man: YEAH! 333 00:12:16,102 --> 00:12:17,112 DREW CAREY... 334 00:12:17,136 --> 00:12:19,114 ARE YOU PREPARED TO ENTER 335 00:12:19,138 --> 00:12:21,016 INTO THIS STATE OF HOLY ACRIMONY 336 00:12:21,040 --> 00:12:22,017 WITH KATE O'BRIEN, 337 00:12:22,041 --> 00:12:24,820 TO DRINK WITH HER, TO CLEAVE TO HER, 338 00:12:24,844 --> 00:12:28,457 TO BOLDLY GO WHERE AT LEAST 20 OR 30 MEN HAVE GONE BEFORE? 339 00:12:28,481 --> 00:12:29,992 WAIT, WAIT. 340 00:12:30,016 --> 00:12:32,461 SINGLE DIGITS, PLEASE. 341 00:12:32,485 --> 00:12:35,297 HEY, LOOK AT ME. I'M GETTING MARRIED. 342 00:12:35,321 --> 00:12:36,765 THEY CAN'T BELIEVE IT EITHER, DREW. 343 00:12:36,789 --> 00:12:39,256 WOULD YOU NOW PLEASE PLACE THE BEER IN HER HAND? 344 00:12:42,929 --> 00:12:44,607 AND YOU, KATE O'BRIEN, 345 00:12:44,631 --> 00:12:48,076 ARE YOU PREPARED TO WED DREW, TO BED DREW, 346 00:12:48,100 --> 00:12:50,546 TO BOLDLY GO WHERE NO WOMAN HAS GONE WILLINGLY 347 00:12:50,570 --> 00:12:51,881 WITHOUT THE PROMISE OF A FREE DINNER 348 00:12:51,905 --> 00:12:53,470 OR COLD, HARD CASH. 349 00:12:55,107 --> 00:12:56,585 I'VE HAD WORSE. 350 00:13:00,312 --> 00:13:02,713 20 OR 30 GUYS. YUCK. 351 00:13:05,284 --> 00:13:07,362 LET'S GET ON WITH IT. I'M LOSING MY BUZZ. 352 00:13:07,386 --> 00:13:08,531 DREW CAREY... 353 00:13:08,555 --> 00:13:11,967 DO YOU TAKE KATE TO BE YOUR UNLAWFULLY WEDDED WIFE? 354 00:13:11,991 --> 00:13:13,402 OW! 355 00:13:13,426 --> 00:13:15,103 GOOD ENOUGH. AND YOU, KATE, 356 00:13:15,127 --> 00:13:17,506 WILL YOU PLEASE TAKE DREW AS IS, 357 00:13:17,530 --> 00:13:19,241 NO REFUNDS, ALL SALES FINAL, 358 00:13:19,265 --> 00:13:21,577 STORE CREDIT WITH RECEIPT ONLY. 359 00:13:21,601 --> 00:13:23,561 DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING IN MY SIZE? 360 00:13:24,971 --> 00:13:26,481 IS THERE ANY REASON WHY THESE TWO 361 00:13:26,505 --> 00:13:27,683 SHOULD NOT BE JOINED TOGETHER? 362 00:13:27,707 --> 00:13:29,952 Crowd: YEAH! 363 00:13:29,976 --> 00:13:31,453 WELL, SINCE THERE ARE NO OBJECTIONS, 364 00:13:31,477 --> 00:13:32,821 I'D LIKE TO REMIND THE BRIDE 365 00:13:32,845 --> 00:13:34,256 BEFORE WE TAKE THE HANDCUFFS OFF 366 00:13:34,280 --> 00:13:35,991 THAT WE ONLY DID THIS TO MAKE HER HAPPY 367 00:13:36,015 --> 00:13:38,126 AND IT WAS ALL DREW'S IDEA. 368 00:13:38,150 --> 00:13:41,864 WITH THAT SAID, I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU DRUNK AND DISORDERLY. 369 00:13:41,888 --> 00:13:45,367 YOU MAY NOW KISS MY ASS. 370 00:14:08,014 --> 00:14:10,459 HEY, I THOUGHT WE REGISTERED FOR A SERVICE FOR EIGHT. 371 00:14:10,483 --> 00:14:12,260 YOU GOT CHEAP FRIENDS, WHAT DO YOU WANT? 372 00:14:12,284 --> 00:14:14,919 HEY, ANOTHER GIFT FROM THE BOYS AT THE BAR. 373 00:14:16,689 --> 00:14:18,166 BOY, YOU CAN NEVER HAVE TOO MANY OF THESE. 374 00:14:18,190 --> 00:14:19,167 YEAH. 375 00:14:19,191 --> 00:14:20,168 HEY, HONEY! 376 00:14:20,192 --> 00:14:22,192 A LITTLE SOMETHING FOR THE DEN! 377 00:14:23,630 --> 00:14:25,908 OH, YOU'RE A LUCKY MAN, DREW CAREY. 378 00:14:25,932 --> 00:14:27,643 YOU REALLY PICKED YOURSELF A WINNER THERE. 379 00:14:27,667 --> 00:14:29,377 YEP. KATE CLEANS UP PRETTY GOOD. 380 00:14:29,401 --> 00:14:31,279 WHY DO YOU THINK KATE'S NOT MARRIED, FOR REAL? 381 00:14:31,303 --> 00:14:33,215 'CAUSE SHE DATES LOSERS. 382 00:14:33,239 --> 00:14:34,282 SHE'S DEMANDING. 383 00:14:34,306 --> 00:14:36,218 SHE'S BOSSY. 384 00:14:36,242 --> 00:14:37,608 SHE HITS. 385 00:14:40,847 --> 00:14:42,091 YEAH, I GUESS. 386 00:14:42,115 --> 00:14:43,425 YOU EVER WONDER WHY, UH, 387 00:14:43,449 --> 00:14:45,027 ONE OF US NEVER MARRIED KATE? 388 00:14:45,051 --> 00:14:46,762 IT WOULD BE LIKE MARRYING YOUR SISTER. 389 00:14:46,786 --> 00:14:49,798 HEY, SOME COUNTRIES, THEY DO THAT. 390 00:14:49,822 --> 00:14:51,333 I'VE ALWAYS THOUGHT WE WERE SAVING HER, 391 00:14:51,357 --> 00:14:53,035 YOU KNOW, JUST IN CASE. 392 00:14:53,059 --> 00:14:55,570 IT IS KIND OF WEIRD THOUGH THAT NONE OF US EVER DATED HER. 393 00:14:55,594 --> 00:14:57,354 I MEAN, ESPECIALLY YOU, DREW. 394 00:14:58,197 --> 00:14:59,508 I GUESS I WAS TOO BUSY FANTASIZING 395 00:14:59,532 --> 00:15:01,198 ABOUT OSWALD'S MOM. 396 00:15:02,501 --> 00:15:03,812 YEAH. YOUR MOM WAS HOT. 397 00:15:03,836 --> 00:15:04,880 SHUT UP. 398 00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:07,683 JAZZERCISING IN HER LITTLE DISCO SHORTS. 399 00:15:07,707 --> 00:15:09,685 YEAH, WELL, MAYBE I WATCHED YOUR MOM, TOO, 400 00:15:09,709 --> 00:15:12,176 IN HER BIG POLYESTER PANTSUIT MOWING THE LAWN. 401 00:15:14,380 --> 00:15:16,525 WELL, I GUESS THAT'S THE REASON WHY 402 00:15:16,549 --> 00:15:17,559 WE NEVER DATED KATE. 403 00:15:17,583 --> 00:15:18,560 HOW ABOUT YOU? 404 00:15:18,584 --> 00:15:20,062 SHE KNEW ME TOO WELL. 405 00:15:20,086 --> 00:15:21,530 BUT I DID CARRY HER EIGHTH-GRADE PICTURE 406 00:15:21,554 --> 00:15:23,065 AROUND WITH ME IN MY WALLET. 407 00:15:23,089 --> 00:15:25,534 I TOLD EVERYBODY SHE WAS MY GIRLFRIEND. 408 00:15:25,558 --> 00:15:26,535 IT WAS KIND OF SWEET BACK THEN, 409 00:15:26,559 --> 00:15:29,171 BUT NOW I GET THE WEIRDEST LOOKS. 410 00:15:29,195 --> 00:15:30,673 I HAD THAT PICTURE... WITH THE LIP GLOSS, 411 00:15:30,697 --> 00:15:31,740 THE MOUTH SLIGHTLY PARTED. 412 00:15:31,764 --> 00:15:32,741 YEAH. UH-HUH. 413 00:15:32,765 --> 00:15:34,209 EIGHTH GRADE WAS A GOOD YEAR FOR KATE. 414 00:15:34,233 --> 00:15:36,478 I KNOW. HA HA HA! 415 00:15:41,974 --> 00:15:43,418 YOU KNOW WHY NONE OF US EVER DATED KATE? 416 00:15:43,442 --> 00:15:44,486 NO. 417 00:15:44,510 --> 00:15:45,988 BECAUSE SHE NEVER SHOWED 418 00:15:46,012 --> 00:15:48,290 THE SLIGHTEST ROMANTIC INTEREST IN ANY OF US. 419 00:15:48,314 --> 00:15:50,625 I DON'T KNOW. I KISSED HER ONCE. 420 00:15:50,649 --> 00:15:52,027 WHAT? 421 00:15:52,051 --> 00:15:53,528 I DID. GRADE SIX. 422 00:15:53,552 --> 00:15:55,712 SHE HAD MONO, AND SHE DARED ME. 423 00:15:56,322 --> 00:15:57,599 STILL COUNTS. 424 00:15:57,623 --> 00:15:58,723 MM-HMM. 425 00:16:00,593 --> 00:16:02,871 I, UH... 426 00:16:02,895 --> 00:16:04,873 I SAW KATE NAKED ONCE. 427 00:16:04,897 --> 00:16:06,308 WHAT? GET OUT OF HERE. 428 00:16:06,332 --> 00:16:08,532 HOW MUCH A THING LIKE THAT COST YOU? 429 00:16:09,769 --> 00:16:11,313 NOTHING. SHE WAS 16. 430 00:16:11,337 --> 00:16:12,781 16? 431 00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:14,416 YEAH. WE WERE UP IN HER HOUSE 432 00:16:14,440 --> 00:16:16,085 UP IN HER BEDROOM, AND, UH, BAM! 433 00:16:16,109 --> 00:16:17,452 SHE CHANGED RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. 434 00:16:17,476 --> 00:16:18,954 WOW. I HAVE A THEORY. 435 00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:20,544 IS SHE REAL HAIRY? 436 00:16:22,115 --> 00:16:23,325 WELL, SHE WASN'T THEN. 437 00:16:23,349 --> 00:16:25,360 THE POINT IS SHE CHANGED IN FRONT OF ME 438 00:16:25,384 --> 00:16:26,494 LIKE I WASN'T EVEN THERE. HMM. 439 00:16:26,518 --> 00:16:27,596 THAT'S WHEN I REALIZED 440 00:16:27,620 --> 00:16:28,897 SHE DIDN'T EVEN SEE ME AS A GUY. 441 00:16:28,921 --> 00:16:30,365 AAH. THAT'S GOTTA HURT. 442 00:16:30,389 --> 00:16:32,534 YEAH. SORRY, MAN. YEAH. 443 00:16:32,558 --> 00:16:33,535 STILL COUNTS, THOUGH. 444 00:16:33,559 --> 00:16:35,359 YOU BET IT DOES. HEY, YEAH. 445 00:16:38,898 --> 00:16:39,975 WHOO! 446 00:16:39,999 --> 00:16:41,543 WHAT A RUSH! 447 00:16:41,567 --> 00:16:44,534 NOW I KNOW WHY DOGS DO IT! 448 00:16:46,572 --> 00:16:48,050 FIRST RIDE IN A LIMO, KATE? 449 00:16:48,074 --> 00:16:50,452 ACTUALLY, IT'S MY SECOND, 450 00:16:50,476 --> 00:16:51,519 BUT MY MOM WOULDN'T LET ME DO THAT 451 00:16:51,543 --> 00:16:52,703 AT GRANDPA'S FUNERAL. 452 00:16:54,546 --> 00:16:56,825 WHY'D YOU GUYS DO ALL THIS ANYWAY? 453 00:16:56,849 --> 00:16:57,960 WELL, YOU KNOW, YOU SEEMED KIND OF DEPRESSED 454 00:16:57,984 --> 00:16:59,061 ABOUT HAVING A WEDDING AND ALL, 455 00:16:59,085 --> 00:17:00,462 SO WE FIGURED A LITTLE PUBLIC HUMILIATION 456 00:17:00,486 --> 00:17:02,297 WAS JUST WHAT THE DOCTOR ORDERED. 457 00:17:02,321 --> 00:17:05,333 YOU'RE THE BEST. ARE WE REALLY GOING TO MORTON'S? 458 00:17:05,357 --> 00:17:07,836 I CAN'T WAIT TO WALK IN LOOKING LIKE THIS. 459 00:17:07,860 --> 00:17:10,460 YEAH. HOPE I DON'T CLASH WITH THE MAITRE D'S HAIR. 460 00:17:12,231 --> 00:17:14,009 HEY, UH, LISTEN, UM... 461 00:17:14,033 --> 00:17:16,812 OSWALD AND LEWIS WERE KIND OF WONDERING 462 00:17:16,836 --> 00:17:18,313 WHY YOU NEVER GOT SERIOUS WITH EITHER OF THEM. 463 00:17:18,337 --> 00:17:20,015 OR YOU KNOW, ANY OF US, REALLY. 464 00:17:20,039 --> 00:17:21,516 ARE YOU KIDDING? 465 00:17:21,540 --> 00:17:24,153 I TOTALLY WOULD'VE. 466 00:17:24,177 --> 00:17:25,154 I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO COMPETE 467 00:17:25,178 --> 00:17:26,521 WITH OSWALD'S MOM. 468 00:17:26,545 --> 00:17:29,557 SHE HAD THE SERIOUS HOTS FOR YOU AND LEWIS. 469 00:17:29,581 --> 00:17:31,559 YOU'RE KIDDING? OH, MY GOD. 470 00:17:31,583 --> 00:17:34,118 WE WERE JUST TALKING AB... OH, YOU'RE KIDDING. 471 00:17:36,488 --> 00:17:37,554 SO... 472 00:17:39,091 --> 00:17:40,068 DID... 473 00:17:40,092 --> 00:17:42,070 ANY OF YOU, YOU KNOW, 474 00:17:42,094 --> 00:17:44,639 EVER HAVE A LITTLE CRUSH ON ME? 475 00:17:44,663 --> 00:17:46,741 MAYBE, YOU KNOW, WHEN WE WERE TEENAGERS. 476 00:17:46,765 --> 00:17:48,043 AND? 477 00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:49,744 THEN WE DISCOVERED MY BROTHER'S MAGAZINES, 478 00:17:49,768 --> 00:17:51,235 AND YOU BECAME OBSOLETE. 479 00:17:52,671 --> 00:17:54,917 COME ON. WE PRACTICALLY HUNG OUT TOGETHER 480 00:17:54,941 --> 00:17:55,918 ALL THE TIME. 481 00:17:55,942 --> 00:17:57,920 YOU PRACTICALLY LIVED AT MY HOUSE. 482 00:17:57,944 --> 00:17:59,955 YEAH, MAYBE A LITTLE MORE THAN I SHOULD HAVE. 483 00:17:59,979 --> 00:18:01,523 WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 484 00:18:01,547 --> 00:18:03,292 WELL, YOU KNOW, THERE WAS THAT TIME YOU, UH... 485 00:18:03,316 --> 00:18:05,928 CHANGED YOUR CLOTHES RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. 486 00:18:05,952 --> 00:18:07,462 I DID WHAT? 487 00:18:07,486 --> 00:18:08,463 WE WERE SIXTEEN, 488 00:18:08,487 --> 00:18:09,464 AND YOU CHANGED RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME 489 00:18:09,488 --> 00:18:10,966 LIKE I WAS THE CHAIR, 490 00:18:10,990 --> 00:18:12,467 THEN I WALKED HOME CRYING. 491 00:18:12,491 --> 00:18:14,258 NO, NO. DON'T FEEL BAD. 492 00:18:15,895 --> 00:18:17,039 THEN I WROTE YOU A LITTLE LETTER, 493 00:18:17,063 --> 00:18:20,508 WHICH I ACCIDENTALLY MAILED TO MY GRANDMA. 494 00:18:20,532 --> 00:18:21,877 SHE WROTE ME BACK SAYING 495 00:18:21,901 --> 00:18:23,045 THAT SHE LOVED ME, TOO, YOU KNOW, 496 00:18:23,069 --> 00:18:24,069 BUT NOT IN THAT WAY. 497 00:18:26,239 --> 00:18:28,783 DREW, I'M SO SORRY. 498 00:18:28,807 --> 00:18:29,985 WOW. 499 00:18:30,009 --> 00:18:32,988 YOU ACTUALLY THOUGHT ABOUT ME LIKE THAT. 500 00:18:33,012 --> 00:18:34,522 THAT'S SO WEIRD. 501 00:18:34,546 --> 00:18:35,757 OH, I DON'T KNOW. 502 00:18:35,781 --> 00:18:37,259 I DON'T THINK IT WOULD HAVE BEEN, YOU KNOW, SO BAD 503 00:18:37,283 --> 00:18:41,218 IF WE'D ACTUALLY DONE THIS, YOU KNOW, GOTTEN TOGETHER. 504 00:18:45,057 --> 00:18:47,569 OH, MY GOD. I'VE GOT HIVES! 505 00:18:47,593 --> 00:18:50,138 OH, MY GOD. YOU'RE COVERED WITH... 506 00:18:50,162 --> 00:18:52,574 DRIVER, TAKE US TO METRO GENERAL RIGHT AWAY. 507 00:18:52,598 --> 00:18:55,844 HEY! OUT OF THE WAY! WE GOT A SICK WOMAN HERE! 508 00:18:55,868 --> 00:18:57,579 WHOO-WHOO-WHOO-WHOO! 509 00:18:57,603 --> 00:18:59,214 WHOO-WHOO-WHOO-WHOO! 510 00:18:59,238 --> 00:19:00,437 WHOO-WHOO-WHOO-WHOO! 511 00:19:10,016 --> 00:19:12,327 HEY, DREW. I HEARD YOU GOT MARRIED LAST NIGHT. 512 00:19:12,351 --> 00:19:13,695 OH, NO, NOT REALLY. IT WAS JUST... 513 00:19:13,719 --> 00:19:15,430 OH, HEY, I DON'T MIND NOT BEING INVITED. 514 00:19:15,454 --> 00:19:17,565 I'M JUST, UH, GLAD A GUY LIKE YOU 515 00:19:17,589 --> 00:19:18,566 COULD FIND SOMEBODY. 516 00:19:18,590 --> 00:19:20,102 HERE. 517 00:19:20,126 --> 00:19:21,803 HEY, THANKS. 518 00:19:21,827 --> 00:19:23,038 I'LL INVITE YOU TO THE NEXT ONE. 519 00:19:23,062 --> 00:19:24,672 SHOULDN'T BE TOO LONG. I GAVE THE BRIDE HIVES. 520 00:19:24,696 --> 00:19:25,807 BUT JUST IN CASE THE MARRIAGE STICKS, 521 00:19:25,831 --> 00:19:28,191 YOU KNOW, WE'RE STILL LOOKING FOR A TOASTER. 522 00:19:31,904 --> 00:19:33,248 OH, DREW. 523 00:19:33,272 --> 00:19:34,383 WHAT? 524 00:19:34,407 --> 00:19:36,651 I THINK CAN HELP YOU WITH HIRING ED BACK. 525 00:19:36,675 --> 00:19:38,186 THERE'S AN OPENING IN SPORTSWEAR. 526 00:19:38,210 --> 00:19:39,621 NO, THERE ISN'T. THERE WILL BE 527 00:19:39,645 --> 00:19:40,822 ONCE YOU FIRE LESLIE. 528 00:19:40,846 --> 00:19:42,291 LESLIE WHO JUST HAD THE WEDDING SHOWER? 529 00:19:42,315 --> 00:19:43,525 BUT SHE'S ON HER HONEYMOON. 530 00:19:43,549 --> 00:19:45,027 COURTESY OF WINFRED-LOUDER. 531 00:19:45,051 --> 00:19:47,296 WE CAUGHT HER ON CAMERA STEALING CASH 532 00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:51,934 AND A BIKINI THAT I COULD USE AS AN EYE PATCH. 533 00:19:51,958 --> 00:19:53,601 GREAT, ALL YOU NEED IS A HOOK HAND AND A PEG LEG. 534 00:19:53,625 --> 00:19:55,070 THE OUTFIT WILL BE COMPLETE. 535 00:19:55,094 --> 00:19:58,340 HERE'S THE NUMBER OF HER HOTEL IN MAUI. 536 00:19:58,364 --> 00:20:01,343 OH, MAN. I HATE TO RUIN SOMEBODY'S HONEYMOON. 537 00:20:01,367 --> 00:20:03,334 THEN DON'T GET MARRIED. HA HA HA. 538 00:20:05,671 --> 00:20:07,416 DREW... 539 00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:08,817 UHH! 540 00:20:08,841 --> 00:20:11,519 DREW, WE'VE GOT TO TALK ABOUT MY HIVES. 541 00:20:11,543 --> 00:20:13,588 I KNOW. I FEEL TERRIBLE. 542 00:20:13,612 --> 00:20:16,224 OH, GOD, DREW. YOU KNEW! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME? 543 00:20:16,248 --> 00:20:18,927 IT JUST CAME OUT. IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK. 544 00:20:18,951 --> 00:20:21,330 WHAT I THINK? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 545 00:20:21,354 --> 00:20:22,697 WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 546 00:20:22,721 --> 00:20:24,532 FORMALDEHYDE. 547 00:20:24,556 --> 00:20:27,135 THEY FOUND FORMALDEHYDE ON THIS DRESS. 548 00:20:27,159 --> 00:20:29,938 YOU KNOW THE STORE'S "WE'LL TAKE ANYTHING BACK" POLICY? 549 00:20:29,962 --> 00:20:31,273 KNOW IT? I'M USING IT TO TRADE 550 00:20:31,297 --> 00:20:32,274 WHATEVER THIS PIECE OF CRAP IS 551 00:20:32,298 --> 00:20:33,308 IN FOR A TOASTER. 552 00:20:33,332 --> 00:20:35,510 DREW, SOMEONE BOUGHT THAT DRESS BEFORE YOU 553 00:20:35,534 --> 00:20:37,779 AND USED IT IN A FUNERAL. 554 00:20:37,803 --> 00:20:39,814 OH, MY GOD. THAT'S HORRIBLE. 555 00:20:39,838 --> 00:20:41,816 THEN THEY HAD WHATEVER SICK AND PERVERSE CEREMONY 556 00:20:41,840 --> 00:20:45,887 SOMEONE WHO WOULD PUT A WEDDING DRESS ON A CORPSE HAS AND RETURNED IT. 557 00:20:45,911 --> 00:20:48,278 DREW, THE DRESS CAME BACK FROM THE DEAD! 558 00:20:50,516 --> 00:20:53,236 WELL, YOU KNOW, IT'S NOT LIKE SHE WORE IT OUT. 559 00:20:53,785 --> 00:20:56,198 HELLO. PERSON WHO WORE THE DEATH DRESS 560 00:20:56,222 --> 00:20:57,799 AND GOT HIVES FROM IT HERE. 561 00:20:57,823 --> 00:21:00,469 I'M SORRY. IT'S JUST I'M SO RELIEVED. 562 00:21:00,493 --> 00:21:01,803 YOU'LL NEVER... HA HA... 563 00:21:01,827 --> 00:21:04,606 NEVER GUESS WHAT I THOUGHT GAVE YOU THE HIVES. 564 00:21:04,630 --> 00:21:05,707 WHAT? 565 00:21:05,731 --> 00:21:07,142 I THOUGHT IT WAS FROM WHAT I SAID 566 00:21:07,166 --> 00:21:08,210 TO YOU IN THE LIMO. 567 00:21:08,234 --> 00:21:09,744 YOU KNOW, ABOUT US GETTING TOGETHER. 568 00:21:09,768 --> 00:21:10,912 I DIDN'T REALLY MEAN 569 00:21:10,936 --> 00:21:12,147 WHAT YOU THOUGHT I MEANT. 570 00:21:12,171 --> 00:21:14,116 THAT'S NOT WHAT I THOUGHT YOU MEANT. 571 00:21:14,140 --> 00:21:16,818 IT JUST, UH, KINDA CAME OUT. 572 00:21:16,842 --> 00:21:18,253 YOU KNOW, I'M NOT, UH... 573 00:21:18,277 --> 00:21:19,921 IT'S NOT LIKE I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR YOU MY WHOLE LIFE. 574 00:21:19,945 --> 00:21:22,957 I'M JUST WAITING FOR THAT ONE GREAT LOVE I HAVEN'T FOUND. 575 00:21:22,981 --> 00:21:24,592 YET. 576 00:21:24,616 --> 00:21:26,194 YET. 577 00:21:26,218 --> 00:21:31,166 DREW, I SHOULD BE SO LUCKY TO MARRY SOMEONE LIKE YOU, 578 00:21:31,190 --> 00:21:33,168 BUT NOT YOU. 579 00:21:33,192 --> 00:21:35,904 AND I SHOULD BE SO LUCKY AS TO MARRY SOMEONE 580 00:21:35,928 --> 00:21:38,473 LIKE ANNA NICOLE SMITH... 581 00:21:38,497 --> 00:21:40,197 YOU KNOW, BUT HER. 582 00:21:43,269 --> 00:21:44,279 SO, UH... 583 00:21:44,303 --> 00:21:46,081 WE NEVER HAVE TO TALK ABOUT THIS AGAIN? 584 00:21:46,105 --> 00:21:47,916 I HOPE NOT. 585 00:21:47,940 --> 00:21:49,384 GOOD. 'CAUSE I'M STARTING TO ITCH. 586 00:21:49,408 --> 00:21:50,519 NOW, UH, 587 00:21:50,543 --> 00:21:52,687 WHY DON'T YOU GO DO WHATEVER YOU UNDEAD DO. 588 00:21:52,711 --> 00:21:53,988 I GOT TO MAKE A PHONE CALL. 589 00:21:54,012 --> 00:21:55,446 LATER. 590 00:22:03,289 --> 00:22:04,766 HELLO, MAUI SUITES? 591 00:22:04,790 --> 00:22:06,768 WELL, MAHALO TO YOU, TOO. 592 00:22:06,792 --> 00:22:08,070 LISTEN, I'D LIKE TO LEAVE A MESSAGE 593 00:22:08,094 --> 00:22:09,204 FOR MISS LESLIE BURKE. 594 00:22:09,228 --> 00:22:10,605 UH-HUH. YOU GOT A PEN READY? 595 00:22:10,629 --> 00:22:12,074 GOOD. 596 00:22:12,098 --> 00:22:13,575 "DEAR LESLIE, 597 00:22:13,599 --> 00:22:15,643 "THEY SAY THAT VACATIONS END TOO SOON. 598 00:22:15,667 --> 00:22:17,634 WELL, GOOD NEWS!" 599 00:22:22,708 --> 00:22:24,820 HEY, WANT TO PLAY A LITTLE JEOPARDY!? 600 00:22:24,844 --> 00:22:26,544 WINNER GETS TO EAT THE LOSER. 601 00:22:28,147 --> 00:22:29,892 MAN, WOULD YOU LOOK AT THESE CATEGORIES? 602 00:22:29,916 --> 00:22:32,193 FLIES, PREHISTORIC HISTORY, 603 00:22:32,217 --> 00:22:35,285 PROTECTIVE COLORING, FAMOUS AMPHIBIANS. 604 00:22:37,122 --> 00:22:39,902 HOW ABOUT SCRABBLE? 605 00:22:40,927 --> 00:22:43,393 NO, YOU CAN'T USE MY COMPUTER. 606 00:22:44,797 --> 00:22:46,775 I DON'T WANT TO MAKE OUT. 607 00:22:46,799 --> 00:22:49,778 CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS. 608 00:22:49,802 --> 00:22:52,802 CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE www.ncicap.org... 42163

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