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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,303 --> 00:00:04,503 AND THAT'S WHY THE FRENCH DON'T WASH. 2 00:00:05,973 --> 00:00:09,186 OK, BOYS, SO WILL YOU BE HAVING ANYTHING ELSE? 3 00:00:09,210 --> 00:00:11,088 I'LL HAVE WHAT BRAD PITT'S HAVING. 4 00:00:11,112 --> 00:00:13,156 YEAH, YOU FIND ME BRAD PITT, 5 00:00:13,180 --> 00:00:14,992 I'LL SERVE IT UP HOT. 6 00:00:15,016 --> 00:00:17,694 YEAH, LET'S TALK ABOUT BRAD PITT. 7 00:00:17,718 --> 00:00:19,629 DID YOU SEE WHO'S PEOPLE MAGAZINE'S 8 00:00:19,653 --> 00:00:21,398 "SEXIEST MAN ALIVE" THIS YEAR? 9 00:00:21,422 --> 00:00:22,599 WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? 10 00:00:22,623 --> 00:00:25,290 THAT JOHN JOHN KENNEDY ISN'T SO SEXY ANYMORE? 11 00:00:26,494 --> 00:00:29,206 I'M NOT SO IMPRESSED WITH BRAD PITT. 12 00:00:29,230 --> 00:00:31,174 I DON'T THINK HE'S EVEN THAT GOOD-LOOKING. 13 00:00:31,198 --> 00:00:32,842 IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU THINK, OSWALD. 14 00:00:32,866 --> 00:00:35,045 THIS IS BIGGER THAN US. IT'S PEOPLE MAGAZINE. 15 00:00:35,069 --> 00:00:36,935 IT'S BEEN DECIDED. 16 00:00:38,372 --> 00:00:40,683 WELL, IF YOU DON'T THINK BRAD PITT'S GOOD-LOOKING, 17 00:00:40,707 --> 00:00:42,747 WHAT GUYS DO YOU THINK ARE GOOD-LOOKING? 18 00:00:43,844 --> 00:00:45,355 I DON'T KNOW. 19 00:00:45,379 --> 00:00:47,090 YOU CAN ONLY LOOK AT THEM 20 00:00:47,114 --> 00:00:49,092 WHEN THEY'RE NOT LOOKING AT YOU. 21 00:00:49,116 --> 00:00:50,527 WHAT?! 22 00:00:50,551 --> 00:00:52,262 WE'RE TALKING ABOUT MOVIES. 23 00:00:52,286 --> 00:00:54,164 WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 24 00:00:54,188 --> 00:00:55,499 I DON'T KNOW. 25 00:00:55,523 --> 00:00:57,600 I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT THIS ANYMORE. 26 00:00:57,624 --> 00:01:00,292 NO. NO, NO, NO. THIS IS INTERESTING. 27 00:01:01,495 --> 00:01:04,174 LET'S SAY YOU WERE IN PRISON. 28 00:01:04,198 --> 00:01:05,842 OH! 29 00:01:05,866 --> 00:01:07,477 NOW, ALL THE WOMEN 30 00:01:07,501 --> 00:01:11,614 HAVE BEEN KILLED BY A MYSTERIOUS DISEASE. 31 00:01:11,638 --> 00:01:12,982 PLUS THE FACT THAT YOUR PARENTS... 32 00:01:13,006 --> 00:01:14,873 VERY UNDERSTANDING. 33 00:01:16,877 --> 00:01:18,917 WHO DO YOU PICK TO BE YOUR CELLMATE? 34 00:01:24,518 --> 00:01:26,685 LIAM NEESON. 35 00:01:28,889 --> 00:01:29,866 AYE, LADDIE. 36 00:01:29,890 --> 00:01:31,268 HEY, WATCH IT. 37 00:01:31,292 --> 00:01:33,136 YOU KNOW, THE THING ABOUT THIS CONVERSATION IS 38 00:01:33,160 --> 00:01:34,704 WE ARE NOT TALKING ABOUT BRAD PITT. 39 00:01:34,728 --> 00:01:35,872 NO? NO. 40 00:01:35,896 --> 00:01:38,075 WE'RE TALKING ABOUT THE WOMEN BRAD PITT GETS. 41 00:01:38,099 --> 00:01:40,177 MAN, WHAT I COULD DO WITH THOSE WOMEN! 42 00:01:40,201 --> 00:01:41,244 YEAH, YOU CAN DRIVE 'EM BACK 43 00:01:41,268 --> 00:01:42,428 TO BRAD PITT'S HOUSE. 44 00:01:44,771 --> 00:01:46,516 YOU KNOW, THE BEAUTIFUL THING 45 00:01:46,540 --> 00:01:48,285 ABOUT SITTIN' IN THIS BAR HERE IN CLEVELAND 46 00:01:48,309 --> 00:01:49,919 IS THAT NOT ONE OF THESE WOMEN 47 00:01:49,943 --> 00:01:51,854 HAS A CHANCE IN HELL OF MEETING BRAD PITT. 48 00:01:51,878 --> 00:01:54,724 SO HERE'S TO US... 49 00:01:54,748 --> 00:01:57,616 THEIR COLD LITTLE SPLASH OF REALITY. 50 00:01:59,653 --> 00:02:01,198 โ™ช MOON OVER PARMA, 51 00:02:01,222 --> 00:02:03,032 โ™ช BRING MY LOVE TO ME TONIGHT โ™ช 52 00:02:03,056 --> 00:02:05,135 โ™ช GUIDE HER TO CLEVELAND โ™ช 53 00:02:05,159 --> 00:02:07,070 โ™ช UNDERNEATH YOUR SILVERY LIGHT โ™ช 54 00:02:07,094 --> 00:02:09,372 โ™ช WE'RE GOIN' BOWLIN' โ™ช 55 00:02:09,396 --> 00:02:11,508 โ™ช SO DON'T LOSE HER IN SOLIN โ™ช 56 00:02:11,532 --> 00:02:14,600 โ™ช MOON OVER PARMA TONIGHT โ™ช 57 00:02:17,138 --> 00:02:20,383 CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS. 58 00:02:20,407 --> 00:02:22,086 โ™ช TAKIN' CARE OF BUSINESS โ™ช 59 00:02:22,110 --> 00:02:23,987 โ™ช WORKIN' OVERTIME, LOOK OUT โ™ช 60 00:02:24,011 --> 00:02:26,389 DREW, LOOKING SHARP. 61 00:02:26,413 --> 00:02:27,691 FEELING SHARP, LEWIS. 62 00:02:27,715 --> 00:02:29,659 DON'T TOUCH ME, MAN. YOU'LL CUT YOURSELF. 63 00:02:29,683 --> 00:02:31,528 MAN, WHAT A PARTY. 64 00:02:31,552 --> 00:02:33,363 CAN'T BELIEVE YOU GUYS ARE STILL HERE. 65 00:02:33,387 --> 00:02:35,999 HEY, LOOK! IT'S TOMORROW. 66 00:02:36,023 --> 00:02:37,467 WHEN YOU GUYS GOING HOME? 67 00:02:37,491 --> 00:02:38,702 I DON'T KNOW ABOUT LEWIS, 68 00:02:38,726 --> 00:02:40,704 BUT I'M STILL WAITING FOR YOU TO PAY ME MY MONEY. 69 00:02:40,728 --> 00:02:42,139 OH, WELL, GET COMFORTABLE, PAL. 70 00:02:42,163 --> 00:02:44,274 YOU WERE THE WORST MOBILE DJ I EVER HIRED. 71 00:02:44,298 --> 00:02:45,809 NO WONDER YOU'RE MOBILE. 72 00:02:45,833 --> 00:02:47,211 YOU'RE ONE STEP AHEAD OF AN ANGRY MOB. 73 00:02:47,235 --> 00:02:48,411 HEY! 74 00:02:48,435 --> 00:02:50,147 I'M ONLY CHARGING YOU 50 BUCKS. 75 00:02:50,171 --> 00:02:51,915 PEOPLE PAY ME 150. 76 00:02:51,939 --> 00:02:53,550 PEOPLE LIKE YOUR SNAPPY PATTER 77 00:02:53,574 --> 00:02:54,584 BETWEEN THE SONGS? 78 00:02:54,608 --> 00:02:56,019 AH, COME ON, THEY LOVE THAT. 79 00:02:56,043 --> 00:02:57,621 HERE'S ONE FOR ALL THE LOVERS 80 00:02:57,645 --> 00:02:58,889 IN THE CROWD. 81 00:02:58,913 --> 00:03:00,390 HOW ABOUT ONE FOR ALL THE SNIPERS 82 00:03:00,414 --> 00:03:01,446 IN THE CROWD? 83 00:03:03,217 --> 00:03:05,528 THANKS FOR THE HELP, LEWIS. MAN, WHAT A MESS. 84 00:03:05,552 --> 00:03:06,764 YEAH, LOOK, I'LL FINISH THIS ROOM, 85 00:03:06,788 --> 00:03:07,765 BUT THEN I GOTTA GET HOME 86 00:03:07,789 --> 00:03:08,766 AND CHANGE FOR WORK. 87 00:03:08,790 --> 00:03:10,100 WE'RE DOING DRUG TESTING TODAY. 88 00:03:10,124 --> 00:03:11,268 DRUG TEST, HUH? 89 00:03:11,292 --> 00:03:15,072 THAT MUST BE A BIG PROBLEM AT A CHEMICAL COMPANY. 90 00:03:15,096 --> 00:03:16,473 WELL, 9 OUT OF 10 TIMES, 91 00:03:16,497 --> 00:03:17,507 IF SOMEONE FAILS THE TEST, 92 00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:18,909 IT'S A DRUGCO PRODUCT. 93 00:03:18,933 --> 00:03:21,211 OH, IT'D MAKE A GREAT ADVERTISING SLOGAN. 94 00:03:21,235 --> 00:03:22,880 DRUGCO... COME ON. 95 00:03:22,904 --> 00:03:24,882 ALL YOUR FRIENDS ARE DOING IT. 96 00:03:24,906 --> 00:03:26,738 HEY! 97 00:03:27,809 --> 00:03:30,020 YOU GOT INTO THE NONGENERIC BEER. 98 00:03:30,044 --> 00:03:32,990 OK, OK, SORRY. LEWIS AND I WILL BUY MORE BEER. 99 00:03:33,014 --> 00:03:35,025 HEY, LET'S TRY THAT NEW DRIVE-THROUGH LIQUOR STORE 100 00:03:35,049 --> 00:03:36,293 AT BROOK PARK AND RIDGE. 101 00:03:36,317 --> 00:03:39,062 MAN, A LIQUOR STORE WITH A WINDOW ON THE SIDE 102 00:03:39,086 --> 00:03:40,330 WHERE YOU CAN BUY WHISKEY, BEER, 103 00:03:40,354 --> 00:03:42,132 WHATEVER YOU WANT WHILE YOU'RE DRIVING. 104 00:03:42,156 --> 00:03:44,156 GOD BLESS AMERICA. 105 00:03:45,860 --> 00:03:47,737 JUST THE THING FOR THAT DRUNK DRIVER 106 00:03:47,761 --> 00:03:49,472 WHO'S CONSTANTLY ON THE GO. 107 00:03:49,496 --> 00:03:51,875 HEY, NO TIME TO STOP AT A REAL BAR. 108 00:03:51,899 --> 00:03:53,443 I GOT THINGS TO DO TODAY. 109 00:03:53,467 --> 00:03:55,913 PLACES TO GO, PEOPLE TO HIT. 110 00:03:55,937 --> 00:03:57,617 BUSY, BUSY, BUSY. POOM! 111 00:03:59,673 --> 00:04:01,651 โ™ช CHRISTMASTIME, UP ON THE SIDEWALK โ™ช 112 00:04:01,675 --> 00:04:02,820 โ™ช POOM POOM POOM โ™ช 113 00:04:02,844 --> 00:04:06,089 COMING. 114 00:04:06,113 --> 00:04:07,224 HEY, KATE! 115 00:04:07,248 --> 00:04:09,359 HI. SORRY I MISSED THE PARTY. 116 00:04:09,383 --> 00:04:11,295 BY THE TIME I DECIDED I WANTED TO LIVE, 117 00:04:11,319 --> 00:04:13,897 I FIGURED EVERYONE HAD GONE HOME. 118 00:04:13,921 --> 00:04:16,766 WELL, YOU MISSED A GREAT ONE, KATE. HEY! 119 00:04:16,790 --> 00:04:18,435 DID YOU KNOW THAT IF THE DOMINO'S GUY 120 00:04:18,459 --> 00:04:20,904 ISN'T BACK IN AN HOUR, THEY CALL THE POLICE? 121 00:04:20,928 --> 00:04:23,874 THAT CREEP BARRY FIRED ME THIS MORNING. 122 00:04:23,898 --> 00:04:25,608 FOR WHAT? FOR BEING LATE. 123 00:04:25,632 --> 00:04:29,579 OH-HO, THAT SUCKS. YOU DRIVE IN TOGETHER. 124 00:04:29,603 --> 00:04:31,581 THAT'S ONLY BECAUSE WE LIVE TOGETHER, 125 00:04:31,605 --> 00:04:32,782 BUT, YOU KNOW, THAT'S OVER. 126 00:04:32,806 --> 00:04:33,817 I THREW HIM OUT LAST NIGHT. 127 00:04:33,841 --> 00:04:36,453 HOLD IT. I'M GETTING SOMETHING. 128 00:04:36,477 --> 00:04:38,956 YOU LIVE WITH YOUR BOSS. 129 00:04:38,980 --> 00:04:40,590 YOU BROKE UP WITH HIM, 130 00:04:40,614 --> 00:04:43,426 AND HE FIRED YOU THE VERY NEXT DAY. 131 00:04:43,450 --> 00:04:45,762 HELLO, RIPLEY'S, YOU'RE NOT GOING 132 00:04:45,786 --> 00:04:47,030 TO BELIEVE THIS. 133 00:04:47,054 --> 00:04:48,631 WHY ARE GUYS LIKE THAT? 134 00:04:48,655 --> 00:04:50,901 I MEAN, YOU TELL THEM IT'S ALL OVER 135 00:04:50,925 --> 00:04:53,103 BECAUSE THE SIMPLE BIOLOGICAL FACT IS, 136 00:04:53,127 --> 00:04:55,494 YES, SIZE DOES COUNT A LITTLE. 137 00:04:58,665 --> 00:04:59,776 I MEAN, IT'S NOT LIKE 138 00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:00,810 I WASN'T THE BEST RECEPTIONIST 139 00:05:00,834 --> 00:05:02,579 HIS STUPID DAMN BODY SHOP EVER HAD, 140 00:05:02,603 --> 00:05:04,414 WHY'D HE HIRE ME IN THE FIRST PLACE? 141 00:05:04,438 --> 00:05:06,738 WAIT. I HAVE MR. OBVIOUS ON LINE TWO. 142 00:05:08,509 --> 00:05:11,588 HE GAVE YOU THE JOB SO HE COULD SLEEP WITH YOU. 143 00:05:11,612 --> 00:05:13,723 WELL, THEN HE'S PRETTY STUPID 144 00:05:13,747 --> 00:05:16,093 BECAUSE I SLEPT WITH HIM BEFORE I GOT THE JOB. 145 00:05:16,117 --> 00:05:17,249 HA! 146 00:05:19,120 --> 00:05:21,365 OH! 147 00:05:21,389 --> 00:05:22,465 HEY, KATE'S HERE. 148 00:05:22,489 --> 00:05:23,500 KATE, DID YOU BRING US BREAKFAST? 149 00:05:23,524 --> 00:05:24,801 YEAH, WHERE'S BREAKFAST? 150 00:05:24,825 --> 00:05:27,037 BREAKFAST? BREAKFAST. 151 00:05:27,061 --> 00:05:28,705 HEY! 152 00:05:28,729 --> 00:05:30,207 CANNED CORN. 153 00:05:30,231 --> 00:05:31,408 WOULD YOU HIT THEM WITH YOUR SHOES 154 00:05:31,432 --> 00:05:32,542 SO WE CAN TALK ABOUT ME? 155 00:05:32,566 --> 00:05:33,543 WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU? 156 00:05:33,567 --> 00:05:35,478 I JUST GOT FIRED. 157 00:05:35,502 --> 00:05:36,646 I'M SORRY, KATE. 158 00:05:36,670 --> 00:05:38,315 WELL, AT LEAST YOU STILL HAVE BARRY. 159 00:05:38,339 --> 00:05:39,649 OH! 160 00:05:39,673 --> 00:05:41,251 DON'T WORRY, KATE. YOU KNOW, THIS COULD BE 161 00:05:41,275 --> 00:05:42,719 THE BEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO YOU. 162 00:05:42,743 --> 00:05:44,388 YOU'RE WAY BETTER THAN THOSE DEAD END JOBS 163 00:05:44,412 --> 00:05:45,389 YOU KEEP TAKING. 164 00:05:45,413 --> 00:05:46,523 I MEAN, LOOK AT ME. 165 00:05:46,547 --> 00:05:48,258 WHEN I FIRST TOOK A JOB AS A SALES CLERK, 166 00:05:48,282 --> 00:05:49,692 I NEVER THOUGHT IT WOULD LEAD TO A CAREER. 167 00:05:49,716 --> 00:05:52,595 BUT NOW I'M ASSISTANT DIRECTOR OF PERSONNEL. 168 00:05:52,619 --> 00:05:55,232 I HAVE A POSITION OF INDIRECT RESPECT 169 00:05:55,256 --> 00:05:58,201 AND OBLIQUE POWER. 170 00:05:58,225 --> 00:06:00,304 YOU THINK YOU COULD YOU USE SOME OF THAT POWER 171 00:06:00,328 --> 00:06:01,738 TO GIVE ME A JOB? 172 00:06:01,762 --> 00:06:04,174 COME ON, KATE, YOU KNOW I CAN'T HIRE FRIENDS. 173 00:06:04,198 --> 00:06:06,376 BUT... I HATE YOU. 174 00:06:06,400 --> 00:06:08,445 I'VE ALWAYS HATED YOU. 175 00:06:08,469 --> 00:06:11,014 EVERYBODY HATES ME WHEN THEY WANT A JOB. 176 00:06:11,038 --> 00:06:12,349 YOU KNOW WHAT? 177 00:06:12,373 --> 00:06:14,451 I SAW THIS SAME THING ON THE "X" FILES. 178 00:06:14,475 --> 00:06:16,686 ONE ALIEN HIRES HIS FRIEND ALIEN 179 00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:18,555 TO HELP DOMINATE THE EARTH. 180 00:06:18,579 --> 00:06:20,157 SURE ENOUGH, HIS FRIEND ARRIVES LATE, 181 00:06:20,181 --> 00:06:23,026 DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO WORK THE GAMMA RAY MACHINE, 182 00:06:23,050 --> 00:06:25,128 NEXT THING YOU KNOW, 183 00:06:25,152 --> 00:06:28,565 THEY'RE BOTH WASHING DISHES ON VENUS. 184 00:06:28,589 --> 00:06:29,766 LEWIS. 185 00:06:29,790 --> 00:06:31,068 HUH? 186 00:06:31,092 --> 00:06:34,204 I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO START. 187 00:06:34,228 --> 00:06:35,372 COME ON, DREW, 188 00:06:35,396 --> 00:06:37,107 I WOULD BE PERFECT IN A DEPARTMENT STORE. 189 00:06:37,131 --> 00:06:38,475 YOU KNOW I'D WORK MY ASS OFF. 190 00:06:39,766 --> 00:06:41,578 YOU HEAR THAT? IT'S THE 8:02 HONK. 191 00:06:41,602 --> 00:06:43,213 IT'S MY ANAL RETENTIVE CAR POOL. 192 00:06:43,237 --> 00:06:44,414 I GOT TO GO. 193 00:06:44,438 --> 00:06:45,782 THINK ABOUT IT. 194 00:06:45,806 --> 00:06:47,851 OK. YOU'RE LYING! 195 00:06:47,875 --> 00:06:49,241 YES! 196 00:06:53,914 --> 00:06:55,314 UGH! 197 00:06:56,583 --> 00:06:58,161 8:41. 198 00:06:58,185 --> 00:07:00,897 YOU KNOW, LARRY, RIGHT ABOUT NOW 199 00:07:00,921 --> 00:07:02,932 I GOT INTERVIEWS STACKED UP AT THE OFFICE. 200 00:07:02,956 --> 00:07:04,368 PRETTY MUCH LIKE YOU GOT ANGRY MOTORISTS 201 00:07:04,392 --> 00:07:05,535 STACKED UP BEHIND YOU. DO YOU THINK 202 00:07:05,559 --> 00:07:07,904 YOU COULD FIRE UP THE BULLET TRAIN HERE? 203 00:07:07,928 --> 00:07:09,506 I DON'T LIKE DRIVING THAT FAST. 204 00:07:09,530 --> 00:07:12,142 IT'S NOT SAFE. 205 00:07:12,166 --> 00:07:15,467 HEY! LOOK AT THAT FAT GUY WALKING. 206 00:07:18,805 --> 00:07:21,151 WOW, LOOK AT THAT, WILL YOU? 207 00:07:21,175 --> 00:07:22,919 "LEARN VETERINARY MEDICINE 208 00:07:22,943 --> 00:07:24,021 THROUGH THE MAIL." 209 00:07:24,045 --> 00:07:27,357 MAN, I'D HATE TO BE A DOG IN THAT HOUSE. 210 00:07:27,381 --> 00:07:28,858 MAIL'S HERE! 211 00:07:28,882 --> 00:07:32,095 YAP YAP YAP YAP YAP! 212 00:07:32,119 --> 00:07:33,997 YAP... YAP... YAP. 213 00:07:34,021 --> 00:07:36,066 I JUST LOST MY DOG. 214 00:07:36,090 --> 00:07:38,301 MY KIDS HAVEN'T STOPPED CRYING FOR 2 DAYS. 215 00:07:38,325 --> 00:07:41,171 OH. 216 00:07:41,195 --> 00:07:42,772 MIND IF I TURN ON THE RADIO? 217 00:07:42,796 --> 00:07:43,806 LET ME CHECK. 218 00:07:43,830 --> 00:07:45,275 ALL IN FAVOR OF TURNING ON 219 00:07:45,299 --> 00:07:46,765 THE RADIO? 220 00:07:48,102 --> 00:07:49,379 YOU KNOW, I'VE BEEN IN THIS CAR POOL 221 00:07:49,403 --> 00:07:51,214 FOR 3 WEEKS. I HAVEN'T WON ONE VOTE. 222 00:07:51,238 --> 00:07:52,682 HOW COME YOU GET TO DECIDE WHEN WE VOTE? 223 00:07:52,706 --> 00:07:53,750 WHO VOTED ON THAT? 224 00:07:53,774 --> 00:07:55,485 I'VE BEEN IN SOME CAR POOLS 225 00:07:55,509 --> 00:07:57,087 THEY ACTUALLY GOT OUT OF THE CAR LAUGHING AND SINGING. 226 00:07:57,111 --> 00:07:58,721 THIS IS LIKE A FUNERAL WHERE THEY'RE NOT 227 00:07:58,745 --> 00:08:00,657 IN A HURRY TO BURY THE GUY. 228 00:08:00,681 --> 00:08:02,459 MY AUNT HAD A FUNERAL. 229 00:08:02,483 --> 00:08:04,327 WE ALL HAD A NICE TIME. 230 00:08:04,351 --> 00:08:05,828 THE FOOD'S ALWAYS GOOD THERE. 231 00:08:05,852 --> 00:08:07,230 OH, YEAH. 232 00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:11,601 THERE WAS A SWAN... 233 00:08:11,625 --> 00:08:13,136 FINALLY! 234 00:08:13,160 --> 00:08:15,827 FINALLY SOMETHING WE CAN ALL TALK ABOUT. 235 00:08:22,203 --> 00:08:24,683 SO HOW DID THE DOG DIE? 236 00:08:32,146 --> 00:08:34,591 HEY, HOW MUCH IS THE MONTHLY INCENTIVE 237 00:08:34,615 --> 00:08:35,992 FOR JOINING THE CARPOOL? 238 00:08:36,016 --> 00:08:37,627 45 BIG OL' DOLLARS. 239 00:08:37,651 --> 00:08:39,529 MAN, THAT ONLY LEAVES ME 10 BUCKS 240 00:08:39,553 --> 00:08:40,530 FOR BULLETS. 241 00:08:40,554 --> 00:08:43,433 NOT GETTING ANY BETTER, HUH? 242 00:08:43,457 --> 00:08:44,834 HE WON'T USE THE CARPOOL LANE. 243 00:08:44,858 --> 00:08:47,036 I USED TO GET HERE IN A HALF AN HOUR. 244 00:08:47,060 --> 00:08:48,438 NOW I HAVE TO GET UP A HALF HOUR EARLIER 245 00:08:48,462 --> 00:08:49,973 JUST TO GET HERE 10 MINUTES LATER. 246 00:08:49,997 --> 00:08:51,874 I MEAN, SURE, CLEVELAND'S AIR IS BETTER, 247 00:08:51,898 --> 00:08:53,343 BUT I'M STUCK IN A CAR WITH 7 PEOPLE 248 00:08:53,367 --> 00:08:55,567 WHO JUST HAD BREAKFAST BURRITOS. 249 00:08:56,270 --> 00:08:58,848 DID MR. BELL CALL YET? DOES HE KNOW I'M LATE? 250 00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:01,151 DAMN! 251 00:09:01,175 --> 00:09:02,852 GOOD LUCK, DREW. FROM HERE ON OUT, 252 00:09:02,876 --> 00:09:04,421 I DON'T KNOW YOU. 253 00:09:06,180 --> 00:09:07,657 Bell, on speakerphone: CAREY, IT'S BELL. YOU THERE? 254 00:09:07,681 --> 00:09:08,825 YES, SIR, MR. BELL. 255 00:09:08,849 --> 00:09:10,260 I'M JUST GOING THROUGH MY FILES. 256 00:09:10,284 --> 00:09:12,629 WOULDN'T HAPPEN TO BE THE COSMETIC COUNTER 257 00:09:12,653 --> 00:09:14,063 APPLICATIONS? 258 00:09:14,087 --> 00:09:15,398 YES, SIR. YOU MUST BE PSYCHIC. 259 00:09:15,422 --> 00:09:17,742 HEY, GUESS HOW MANY FINGERS I'M HOLDING UP. 260 00:09:20,261 --> 00:09:23,006 I NEED THAT POSITION FILLED BY MONDAY, CAREY. 261 00:09:23,030 --> 00:09:24,608 CUSTOMERS ARE COMPLAINING THAT THEY HAVE TO WANDER 262 00:09:24,632 --> 00:09:26,776 FROM COUNTER TO COUNTER LOOKING FOR HELP. 263 00:09:26,800 --> 00:09:28,278 YES, SIR, MR. BELL. 264 00:09:28,302 --> 00:09:29,982 YOU KNOW, IT'S ALWAYS A PLEASURE TO TALK... 265 00:09:30,937 --> 00:09:32,815 LOIS... 266 00:09:32,839 --> 00:09:34,251 WOULD YOU SEND BACK MY FIRST INTERVIEW, 267 00:09:34,275 --> 00:09:35,752 PLEASE? SURE. 268 00:09:35,776 --> 00:09:37,554 YES, MR. BELL. RIGHT AWAY, MR. BELL. 269 00:09:37,578 --> 00:09:38,788 HOW'S THE HEART, MR. BELL? 270 00:09:38,812 --> 00:09:41,625 OH, TOO BAD, MR. BELL. POOM! 271 00:09:41,649 --> 00:09:42,959 DREW. YES? 272 00:09:42,983 --> 00:09:44,894 MIMI BOBECK. 273 00:09:44,918 --> 00:09:46,363 I'M HERE FOR THE INTERVIEW. 274 00:09:46,387 --> 00:09:48,898 NICE TO MEET YOU, MIMI. 275 00:09:48,922 --> 00:09:50,700 WHAT DEPARTMENT ARE YOU APPLYING FOR? 276 00:09:50,724 --> 00:09:53,102 COSMETICS. 277 00:09:53,126 --> 00:09:54,871 OK, GREAT. 278 00:09:54,895 --> 00:09:56,495 PLEASE SIT DOWN. 279 00:09:58,832 --> 00:10:00,577 LET'S SEE HERE. 280 00:10:00,601 --> 00:10:03,213 HMM. "2 YEARS IN PHONE SALES. 281 00:10:03,237 --> 00:10:06,283 "DARKROOM ASSISTANT. 282 00:10:06,307 --> 00:10:08,207 READER FOR THE BLIND." 283 00:10:09,843 --> 00:10:11,854 I'M ALSO SINGLE, IF THAT HELPS. 284 00:10:11,878 --> 00:10:13,312 NOT ME. 285 00:10:15,349 --> 00:10:16,560 I MEAN, UH, YOU KNOW, WE DON'T COUNT 286 00:10:16,584 --> 00:10:18,295 MARITAL STATUS EITHER WAY. 287 00:10:18,319 --> 00:10:20,063 NOW, YOU KNOW, WE WILL BE INTERVIEWING 288 00:10:20,087 --> 00:10:21,598 QUITE A FEW PEOPLE FOR THIS JOB. 289 00:10:21,622 --> 00:10:24,501 OH, WELL, SO THAT'S THAT. WELL, NICE MEETING YOU. 290 00:10:24,525 --> 00:10:25,669 EXCUSE ME? 291 00:10:25,693 --> 00:10:27,003 THAT'S THE CODE. 292 00:10:27,027 --> 00:10:28,771 "INTERVIEWING QUITE A FEW PEOPLE" MEANS FORGET IT. 293 00:10:28,795 --> 00:10:30,740 JUST LIKE "THANKS FOR STOPPING BY" MEANS 294 00:10:30,764 --> 00:10:32,509 WE DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU EVER AGAIN. 295 00:10:32,533 --> 00:10:33,743 THAT'S NOT WHAT I WAS SAYING. 296 00:10:33,767 --> 00:10:35,478 CUT THE CRAP, MR. CAREY. 297 00:10:35,502 --> 00:10:36,979 I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING. 298 00:10:37,003 --> 00:10:38,248 YOU HAVE TO BE ONE OF THOSE CLASSICALLY 299 00:10:38,272 --> 00:10:40,483 GOOD-LOOKING WOMEN TO SELL COSMETICS. 300 00:10:40,507 --> 00:10:42,051 OH, NO, NOT NECESSARILY, 301 00:10:42,075 --> 00:10:43,220 YOUR LOOKS ARE JUST FINE. 302 00:10:43,244 --> 00:10:45,755 DID I SAY THEY WEREN'T? 303 00:10:45,779 --> 00:10:49,180 UH, I WAS HOPING SOMEBODY HAD. 304 00:10:50,984 --> 00:10:52,962 WELL, HOW DOES IT WORK, MR. CAREY, HUH? 305 00:10:52,986 --> 00:10:55,265 SOME EMPTY-HEADED BIMBO WALKS IN HERE, 306 00:10:55,289 --> 00:10:56,999 AND YOU FEEL SOMETHING IN YOUR GROIN, 307 00:10:57,023 --> 00:10:58,167 THEY GET THE JOB? WHAT? 308 00:10:58,191 --> 00:10:59,802 WHAT OTHER REQUIREMENTS DIDN'T I MEET? 309 00:10:59,826 --> 00:11:01,371 WASN'T MY SKIRT SHORT ENOUGH? 310 00:11:01,395 --> 00:11:03,973 DIDN'T I BEND OVER ENOUGH DURING THE INTERVIEW? 311 00:11:03,997 --> 00:11:05,208 WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO GET A SEXIST 312 00:11:05,232 --> 00:11:06,809 AS YOU TO HIRE ME? 313 00:11:06,833 --> 00:11:08,177 OH, YOU KNOW, YOU'RE... 314 00:11:08,201 --> 00:11:10,146 AHEM... CERTAINLY UNDER CONSIDERATION, 315 00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:11,214 SO THERE'S... AHEM... 316 00:11:11,238 --> 00:11:13,358 NO REASON TO BECOME DEFENSIVE. 317 00:11:13,940 --> 00:11:15,218 WHAT'S YOUR BOSS' NAME? 318 00:11:15,242 --> 00:11:16,720 I CAN FIND OUT IF YOU DON'T TELL ME. 319 00:11:16,744 --> 00:11:18,455 LOOK, HIS NAME'S MR. BELL. 320 00:11:18,479 --> 00:11:19,623 MR. BELL. 321 00:11:19,647 --> 00:11:21,358 BUT I THINK YOU'RE MAKING A BIG MISTAKE 322 00:11:21,382 --> 00:11:22,992 HERE. YOU KNOW, YOU'RE NOT BEING JUDGED BY 323 00:11:23,016 --> 00:11:23,993 ANYTHING BUT YOUR APPLICATION. 324 00:11:24,017 --> 00:11:25,828 HEY, I SEE YOU SPEAK SPANISH. 325 00:11:25,852 --> 00:11:28,965 YOU'RE IN REALLY BIG TROUBLE. YOU KNOW THAT? 326 00:11:28,989 --> 00:11:30,333 I DIDN'T COME IN HERE TO BE INSULTED 327 00:11:30,357 --> 00:11:32,969 BY SOME CREWCUT JERK WHO THINKS THIS JOB 328 00:11:32,993 --> 00:11:35,204 IS HIS OWN PERSONAL BEAUTY CONTEST. 329 00:11:35,228 --> 00:11:36,528 YOU'RE A PIG! 330 00:11:38,499 --> 00:11:39,998 WE'LL CALL AND LET YOU KNOW! 331 00:11:42,002 --> 00:11:44,670 THANKS FOR STOPPING BY! 332 00:11:51,278 --> 00:11:53,189 HEY, EVERYBODY READY TO GO? 333 00:11:53,213 --> 00:11:54,224 DREW'S NOT HOME YET. 334 00:11:54,248 --> 00:11:55,558 HOW'D THE DRUG TEST GO? 335 00:11:55,582 --> 00:11:56,692 WELL, I COULDN'T WAIT. 336 00:11:56,716 --> 00:11:58,561 NOW, I GOTTA DO A MAKEUP. 337 00:11:58,585 --> 00:12:00,597 ANY LUCK ON THE JOB FRONT? 338 00:12:00,621 --> 00:12:02,521 McNOTHING. 339 00:12:03,624 --> 00:12:05,868 COME ON, ASK ME ABOUT MY DAY. I DARE YA! 340 00:12:05,892 --> 00:12:07,437 ALL RIGHTY, DREW. HOW WAS YOUR DAY? 341 00:12:07,461 --> 00:12:08,704 YOU'RE NOT SINCERE ENOUGH. 342 00:12:08,728 --> 00:12:10,573 YOU! YOU ASK ME ABOUT MY DAY. 343 00:12:10,597 --> 00:12:13,243 OK, DREW, HOW WAS YOUR DAY? 344 00:12:13,267 --> 00:12:14,710 SO, YOU WANT TO KNOW HOW MY DAY WAS, HUH? 345 00:12:14,734 --> 00:12:16,078 IT WAS LOUSY. 346 00:12:16,102 --> 00:12:18,381 IT WAS LIKE THE RUBBER GLOVE PART OF A PHYSICAL EXAM. 347 00:12:18,405 --> 00:12:20,883 OOH! THAT'S A BAD DAY. 348 00:12:20,907 --> 00:12:21,984 MY GOD, WHAT HAPPENED? 349 00:12:22,008 --> 00:12:24,720 SOME CRAZY WOMAN I INTERVIEWED 350 00:12:24,744 --> 00:12:26,722 COMPLAINED TO MY BOSS. AND I GOT REAMED. 351 00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:29,225 YOU, MR. EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH? 352 00:12:29,249 --> 00:12:30,993 HEY, YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT I'M EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH. 353 00:12:31,017 --> 00:12:32,962 YOU KNOW WHY? 'CAUSE I DO MY JOB WELL. 354 00:12:32,986 --> 00:12:34,297 I TREAT EVERYONE FAIRLY. 355 00:12:34,321 --> 00:12:36,299 THIS WOMAN CALLED ME A SEXIST. 356 00:12:36,323 --> 00:12:37,767 YOU KNOW HOW MANY FORMS YOU HAVE TO FILL OUT 357 00:12:37,791 --> 00:12:38,901 WHEN SOMEONE CALLS YOU A SEXIST? 358 00:12:38,925 --> 00:12:41,937 8. 359 00:12:41,961 --> 00:12:43,973 WHAT'D YOU DO, HARASS HER? 360 00:12:43,997 --> 00:12:46,075 NO, I DIDN'T HARASS HER. 361 00:12:46,099 --> 00:12:47,259 SO SHE WANTED IT? 362 00:12:48,968 --> 00:12:52,114 NO. ALL SHE WANTED WAS A JOB 363 00:12:52,138 --> 00:12:53,216 IN THE COSMETICS DEPARTMENT, 364 00:12:53,240 --> 00:12:54,717 BUT I COULDN'T HIRE HER. 365 00:12:54,741 --> 00:12:58,076 SHE CAME IN LOOKING LIKE SOMETHING MY NEPHEW COLORED. 366 00:12:59,680 --> 00:13:01,023 OH, THERE'S AN OPENING 367 00:13:01,047 --> 00:13:02,258 AT THE COSMETICS DEPARTMENT? 368 00:13:02,282 --> 00:13:04,749 YEAH, BUT NOT FOR HER. THERE'S TOO MANY MIRRORS. 369 00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:09,332 YOU KNOW, WHAT REALLY TICKS ME OFF 370 00:13:09,356 --> 00:13:11,568 IS I'M UP FOR PROMOTION IN A FEW WEEKS. 371 00:13:11,592 --> 00:13:14,237 NOW, I GOT TO BUST MY HUMP TO GET OVER THIS BLACK MARK. 372 00:13:14,261 --> 00:13:16,239 YOU KNOW I'M NOT LOOKING TO BUY A FERRARI, 373 00:13:16,263 --> 00:13:17,973 BUT I'D LIKE TO GET A FEW PAYCHECKS AHEAD, 374 00:13:17,997 --> 00:13:19,409 MAYBE ACTUALLY GIVE SOMETHING TO CHARITY 375 00:13:19,433 --> 00:13:22,178 INSTEAD OF JUST LYING ABOUT IT ON MY TAXES. 376 00:13:22,202 --> 00:13:23,580 WHAT'S THE RUSH? 377 00:13:23,604 --> 00:13:25,981 HEY, I SET GOALS FOR MYSELF. 378 00:13:26,005 --> 00:13:27,983 MAN, I GOT DEADLINES. I DON'T WANT TO FIND OUT 379 00:13:28,007 --> 00:13:29,085 I GOT MY HIGH SCHOOL REUNION COMING UP, 380 00:13:29,109 --> 00:13:30,753 I ONLY GOT 6 MONTHS 381 00:13:30,777 --> 00:13:32,021 TO MAKE SOMETHING OF MYSELF. 382 00:13:32,045 --> 00:13:33,055 WHAT AM I GONNA DO? BE IN AN ALLEY? 383 00:13:33,079 --> 00:13:35,157 COME ON 7! DADDY NEEDS TO LOSE WEIGHT 384 00:13:35,181 --> 00:13:37,527 AND GET A NEW CAREER. COME ON, BABY! 385 00:13:37,551 --> 00:13:40,029 I NEED HAIR RIGHT NOW! 386 00:13:40,053 --> 00:13:42,332 MAN, IT'S KILLING ME. 387 00:13:42,356 --> 00:13:43,666 I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU'RE SAYING, DREW. 388 00:13:43,690 --> 00:13:46,336 MY PHARMACEUTICAL COMPANY'S DOING BIG THINGS. 389 00:13:46,360 --> 00:13:48,438 ANY DAY NOW AT DRUGCO COULD BE THE DAY 390 00:13:48,462 --> 00:13:50,240 THAT WE COME UP WITH THAT NEW MIRACLE DRUG. 391 00:13:50,264 --> 00:13:53,008 AND IT'S GONNA BE THE GUYS THAT WORKED AROUND THE CLOCK 392 00:13:53,032 --> 00:13:55,245 THAT GET ALL THE CREDIT. YOU KNOW WHAT? 393 00:13:55,269 --> 00:13:57,146 I WANT TO BE ONE OF THOSE GUYS. 394 00:13:57,170 --> 00:13:59,282 LEWIS. HUH? 395 00:13:59,306 --> 00:14:01,817 YOU'RE THE MAINTENANCE MAN. 396 00:14:01,841 --> 00:14:03,853 START WEARING ONE OF THOSE MASKS 397 00:14:03,877 --> 00:14:05,477 WHEN YOU SWEEP UP, WILL YA BUDDY? 398 00:14:10,550 --> 00:14:12,962 AHH, MEAT. 399 00:14:12,986 --> 00:14:14,530 HEY, YOU KNOW, PAL, THAT CHEESEBURGER'S 400 00:14:14,554 --> 00:14:16,065 GONNA GIVE YOU A HEART ATTACK. 401 00:14:16,089 --> 00:14:17,867 WHAT?! 402 00:14:17,891 --> 00:14:20,370 I ALMOST SWALLOWED THAT DAMN THING! 403 00:14:20,394 --> 00:14:22,805 DOESN'T THE GOVERNMENT REGULATE THIS STUFF? 404 00:14:22,829 --> 00:14:24,307 THANK GOD FOR YOU, SIR. 405 00:14:24,331 --> 00:14:26,531 I ALMOST HAD A MOMENT OF JOY. 406 00:14:28,101 --> 00:14:30,179 SAFETY NAZI, GET LOST. 407 00:14:30,203 --> 00:14:32,181 YOU KNOW, DREW, 408 00:14:32,205 --> 00:14:33,416 YOU'RE STILL A LITTLE ON EDGE. 409 00:14:33,440 --> 00:14:34,584 GEE, THINK SO? 410 00:14:34,608 --> 00:14:36,085 WELL, THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO TELL. 411 00:14:36,109 --> 00:14:37,520 LET'S DO A LITTLE STRESS TEST. 412 00:14:37,544 --> 00:14:39,021 OW! 413 00:14:39,045 --> 00:14:41,424 YOU KNOW, DREW, STRESS MANAGEMENT 414 00:14:41,448 --> 00:14:42,759 IS THE KEY TO LONGEVITY. 415 00:14:42,783 --> 00:14:45,027 I'VE ALWAYS FOUND THAT, UH, SENSORY DEPRIVATION 416 00:14:45,051 --> 00:14:46,228 USUALLY DOES THE TRICK. 417 00:14:46,252 --> 00:14:48,264 YOU'RE IN TOTAL DARKNESS 418 00:14:48,288 --> 00:14:51,634 GRADUALLY RELAXING EVERY MUSCLE IN YOUR BODY 419 00:14:51,658 --> 00:14:54,470 AS YOU LIE IN A WARM POOL OF WATER. 420 00:14:54,494 --> 00:14:56,238 UH-OH. 421 00:14:56,262 --> 00:14:58,129 I GOT TO PEE. 422 00:14:59,666 --> 00:15:02,712 THEY DON'T LET HIM BACK IN THOSE TANKS. 423 00:15:02,736 --> 00:15:04,146 OH, MY GOD! THERE SHE IS. 424 00:15:04,170 --> 00:15:05,214 WHO? 425 00:15:05,238 --> 00:15:06,571 MY INTERVIEW WITH A VAMPIRE. 426 00:15:08,842 --> 00:15:11,654 WOW. SHE WANTS TO SELL MAKEUP? 427 00:15:11,678 --> 00:15:13,289 WELL, SHE SHOULD KNOW SOMETHING ABOUT IT. 428 00:15:13,313 --> 00:15:16,359 SHE CERTAINLY BUYS ENOUGH OF IT. 429 00:15:16,383 --> 00:15:18,127 MAN, WHAT I'D LIKE TO SAY TO HER 430 00:15:18,151 --> 00:15:20,630 WELL, WHAT'S THIS THEN? 431 00:15:20,654 --> 00:15:22,231 AFTER A HARD DAY OF SCREWING 432 00:15:22,255 --> 00:15:24,166 QUALIFIED APPLICANTS OUT OF JOBS, 433 00:15:24,190 --> 00:15:25,857 IT'S MILLER TIME? 434 00:15:27,126 --> 00:15:29,872 DREW, NO NEED TO RESPOND. 435 00:15:29,896 --> 00:15:32,274 JUST IGNORE HER. LET IT GO. 436 00:15:32,298 --> 00:15:35,311 OH, AND YOU MUST BE THE TRASH THAT GOT THE JOB. 437 00:15:35,335 --> 00:15:36,512 DON'T GET UP. 438 00:15:36,536 --> 00:15:38,035 I DON'T WANT TO SEE WHERE HIS HAND IS. 439 00:15:39,840 --> 00:15:41,984 GET HER! 440 00:15:42,008 --> 00:15:43,653 IF YOU NEED ANY HELP, REMEMBER, 441 00:15:43,677 --> 00:15:46,622 I USED TO BE A RODEO CLOWN. 442 00:15:46,646 --> 00:15:47,824 NO, YOU KNOW WHAT? 443 00:15:47,848 --> 00:15:49,625 I'M NOT GONNA STOOP TO HER LEVEL. 444 00:15:49,649 --> 00:15:51,427 I'M JUST GONNA TELL HER THE TRUTH. 445 00:15:51,451 --> 00:15:52,451 SOMEBODY'S GOT TO. 446 00:15:56,656 --> 00:15:59,635 AHEM. EXCUSE ME, MS. BOBECK? 447 00:15:59,659 --> 00:16:01,303 OH, GREAT. YOU RUINED MY DAY. 448 00:16:01,327 --> 00:16:02,839 NOW YOU'RE GOING TO RUIN MY NIGHT? 449 00:16:02,863 --> 00:16:05,541 RUINED YOUR DAY? YOU ALMOST GOT ME FI... 450 00:16:05,565 --> 00:16:08,578 LISTEN, CAN WE TALK HONESTLY, 451 00:16:08,602 --> 00:16:10,246 JUST A COUPLE PEOPLE IN A BAR? 452 00:16:10,270 --> 00:16:11,848 NO INTERVIEWS, NO SUITS, NOTHING. 453 00:16:11,872 --> 00:16:13,182 JUST REGULAR FOLKS, OK? 454 00:16:13,206 --> 00:16:14,751 WHAT'RE YOU BOTHERING ME FOR? 455 00:16:14,775 --> 00:16:16,808 CAN'T YOU GET LAID HERE EITHER? 456 00:16:18,578 --> 00:16:20,823 LOOK, I DIDN'T COME OVER HERE TO UPSET YOU. 457 00:16:20,847 --> 00:16:22,057 BECAUSE IF YOU START TO CRY 458 00:16:22,081 --> 00:16:23,058 AND YOUR MAKEUP STARTS TO RUN, 459 00:16:23,082 --> 00:16:25,349 I DON'T HAVE THAT KIND OF TIME. 460 00:16:26,686 --> 00:16:27,897 JUST WANT YOU TO CONSIDER 461 00:16:27,921 --> 00:16:29,565 THE POSSIBILITY THAT IT MIGHT BE YOU. 462 00:16:29,589 --> 00:16:30,700 I MEAN, I COULDN'T HIRE YOU 463 00:16:30,724 --> 00:16:31,868 FOR ANY JOB IN THAT STORE. 464 00:16:31,892 --> 00:16:33,636 YOU'RE JUST A NASTY PERSON. 465 00:16:33,660 --> 00:16:36,994 SO MY LOOKS HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH IT? 466 00:16:42,068 --> 00:16:44,346 I SAID WE WERE GOING TO BE HONEST, 467 00:16:44,370 --> 00:16:48,250 AND, UM, YES, THEY DID. A LITTLE BIT. 468 00:16:48,274 --> 00:16:50,820 OH, NO. YOU'RE NOT SEXIST. YOU'RE JUST STUPID. 469 00:16:50,844 --> 00:16:53,489 HEY, SOMETIMES APPEARANCE MATTERS. 470 00:16:53,513 --> 00:16:54,524 YOU KNOW WHAT? 471 00:16:54,548 --> 00:16:55,858 I'M NEVER GOING TO MODEL SPEEDOS. 472 00:16:55,882 --> 00:16:56,893 I'D LOOK LIKE A BARTLETT PEAR 473 00:16:56,917 --> 00:16:57,894 WITH A RUBBER BAND 474 00:16:57,918 --> 00:16:59,662 WRAPPED AROUND THE BOTTOM. 475 00:16:59,686 --> 00:17:00,930 BUT THAT'S LIFE. 476 00:17:00,954 --> 00:17:01,931 YOU OUT AND FIND SOMETHING YOU'RE GOOD AT 477 00:17:01,955 --> 00:17:04,033 AND YOU QUIT BLAMING EVERYBODY ELSE. 478 00:17:04,057 --> 00:17:07,437 WELL, WHEN YOU PUT IT LIKE THAT, 479 00:17:07,461 --> 00:17:09,461 BITE ME, JACKASS! 480 00:17:11,498 --> 00:17:13,779 HEY, DREW, WHO'S YOUR GOOD-LOOKIN' FRIEND? 481 00:17:17,370 --> 00:17:18,448 CAN'T YOU COME UP WITH SOMETHING 482 00:17:18,472 --> 00:17:19,582 MORE ORIGINAL, LOUIS? 483 00:17:19,606 --> 00:17:21,840 SHE HEARS THAT ALL DAY LONG. 484 00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:28,591 GEE, YOU HAVE A LOT OF THE QUALITIES 485 00:17:28,615 --> 00:17:30,225 WE'RE LOOKING FOR IN THIS POSITION. 486 00:17:30,249 --> 00:17:33,696 HAVEN'T YOU EVER HAD A JOB ANYWHERE? 487 00:17:33,720 --> 00:17:35,798 LISTEN, UH, I HAVE TO FILL THIS JOB 488 00:17:35,822 --> 00:17:37,166 IN AN HOUR. SO... 489 00:17:37,190 --> 00:17:38,200 WHY DON'T YOU GO WAIT OUT IN THE LOBBY. 490 00:17:38,224 --> 00:17:39,769 AND I'LL TALK TO THE SUPERVISOR. 491 00:17:39,793 --> 00:17:42,004 THANK YOU SO MUCH. 492 00:17:42,028 --> 00:17:45,007 NO, THANK YOU. OH, GOD. FILL THIS OUT. 493 00:17:45,031 --> 00:17:46,141 GET IT APPROVED BY A SUPERVISOR. 494 00:17:46,165 --> 00:17:48,043 THAT'S ME AND THANK YOU, NATALIE. 495 00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:50,145 GET OUT BY 5:00. GO OVER TO OSWALD'S HOUSE. 496 00:17:50,169 --> 00:17:52,014 BURN IT DOWN. THAT'LL BE HIS STRESS TEST. 497 00:17:52,038 --> 00:17:53,048 AND I'LL HAVE A NAP. 498 00:17:53,072 --> 00:17:54,617 AHEM. KATE! 499 00:17:54,641 --> 00:17:56,452 HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING DOWNTOWN? 500 00:17:56,476 --> 00:17:57,587 YOU GOT AN INTERVIEW? 501 00:17:57,611 --> 00:17:58,654 YEAH. 502 00:17:58,678 --> 00:17:59,789 MAN, YOU'RE SHOO-IN. YOU LOOK GREAT. 503 00:17:59,813 --> 00:18:01,090 HEY YOU WANT TO GO OUT FOR A BITE TO EAT? 504 00:18:01,114 --> 00:18:02,558 I CAN LEAVE EARLY. I JUST FILLED THE JOB. 505 00:18:02,582 --> 00:18:04,494 OHH! NO, YOU DIDN'T. 506 00:18:04,518 --> 00:18:07,530 COME ON. JUST TAKE 10 MINUTES TO CONSIDER ME. 507 00:18:07,554 --> 00:18:08,531 NO. 508 00:18:08,555 --> 00:18:10,466 THIS WILL SCREW UP OUR RELATIONSHIP. 509 00:18:10,490 --> 00:18:12,334 IT'S EVEN WORSE THAN WHEN FRIENDS HAVE SEX. 510 00:18:12,358 --> 00:18:15,771 YOU KNOW, 'CAUSE AT LEAST THEN THEY HAD SEX. 511 00:18:15,795 --> 00:18:17,874 AHEM! EXCUSE ME, DREW. 512 00:18:17,898 --> 00:18:19,308 THE CARPOOL TOOK A VOTE. 513 00:18:19,332 --> 00:18:21,611 WE CHIPPED IN FOR THIS BUS PASS. 514 00:18:21,635 --> 00:18:22,712 IT'S OUR LITTLE WAY OF SAYING 515 00:18:22,736 --> 00:18:24,046 WE'RE SORRY THINGS DIDN'T WORK OUT. 516 00:18:24,070 --> 00:18:26,448 WHAT?! YOU CAN'T KICK ME OUT OF THE CARPOOL! 517 00:18:26,472 --> 00:18:28,117 I CAN'T GO BACK TO THE BUS. WHO AM I SUPPOSED 518 00:18:28,141 --> 00:18:29,118 TO DRIVE IN WITH? 519 00:18:29,142 --> 00:18:30,686 THE CARPOOL TOOK A VOTE. 520 00:18:30,710 --> 00:18:32,276 WE DON'T CARE. 521 00:18:33,647 --> 00:18:35,658 I'LL BE IN YOUR CARPOOL. 522 00:18:36,783 --> 00:18:38,628 EXCUSE ME. YES, MR. BELL. 523 00:18:38,652 --> 00:18:40,162 LISTEN, I DON'T WANT TO TELL YOU 524 00:18:40,186 --> 00:18:41,230 HOW TO DO YOUR JOB, 525 00:18:41,254 --> 00:18:43,332 BUT I SAW A YOUNG WOMAN IN THE LOBBY 526 00:18:43,356 --> 00:18:45,535 WHO SEEMS PERFECT FOR THE COSMETICS COUNTER. 527 00:18:45,559 --> 00:18:47,503 YOUNG, WELL-DRESSED 528 00:18:47,527 --> 00:18:48,671 I KNOW, MR. BELL. 529 00:18:48,695 --> 00:18:50,740 SHE'S WEARING A TIGHT BLUE SUIT, 530 00:18:50,764 --> 00:18:53,208 COME AND GET ME PUMPS. YOU CANNOT MISS THIS. 531 00:18:53,232 --> 00:18:54,977 I TELL YOU, WHEN SHE BENT OVER TO DRINK WATER, 532 00:18:55,001 --> 00:18:56,300 I NEARLY CHOKED ON... 533 00:18:58,572 --> 00:18:59,782 YES, SIR, MR. BELL. 534 00:18:59,806 --> 00:19:01,050 I KNOW I ONLY HAVE 45 MINUTES. 535 00:19:01,074 --> 00:19:02,117 I'M RIGHT ON TOP OF IT. 536 00:19:02,141 --> 00:19:03,452 I'LL DO IT RIGHT AWAY. 537 00:19:03,476 --> 00:19:05,655 I CAN'T DO THIS. 538 00:19:05,679 --> 00:19:07,056 WHAT IF I HAVE TO FIRE YOU? 539 00:19:07,080 --> 00:19:08,390 AND I'M SURE I'M GONNA HAVE TO. 540 00:19:08,414 --> 00:19:09,391 HOW WILL ARE WE SUPPOSED TO BE 541 00:19:09,415 --> 00:19:10,392 FRIENDS AFTER THAT? 542 00:19:10,416 --> 00:19:12,327 YOU WON'T HAVE TO FIRE ME. 543 00:19:12,351 --> 00:19:14,363 YOU COULD KILL ME. HOW'S THAT? 544 00:19:14,387 --> 00:19:16,198 YEAH. WELL, IT MAY SOLVE SOME PROBLEMS 545 00:19:16,222 --> 00:19:18,668 BUT, YOU KNOW, IT MAY CREATE OTHERS. 546 00:19:18,692 --> 00:19:20,335 COME ON, YOU SAID YOURSELF 547 00:19:20,359 --> 00:19:21,737 THAT I SHOULD WORK IN A NICE PLACE 548 00:19:21,761 --> 00:19:23,138 WHERE I COULD GET AHEAD FOR ONCE. 549 00:19:23,162 --> 00:19:25,274 NOBODY IS GOING TO HIRE ME FOR THIS KINDA JOB 550 00:19:25,298 --> 00:19:27,043 WITH MY BACKGROUND IN BODY SHOPS. 551 00:19:27,067 --> 00:19:29,845 YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE THAT WOULD GIVE ME A CHANCE. 552 00:19:29,869 --> 00:19:31,970 WHAT DO YOU SAY? 553 00:19:45,518 --> 00:19:47,797 WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO TELL NATALIE? 554 00:19:47,821 --> 00:19:49,198 SHE WAS REALLY LOOKING FORWARD 555 00:19:49,222 --> 00:19:50,265 TO HAVING A RESUME. 556 00:19:50,289 --> 00:19:53,202 OH, GOD, DREW, THANK YOU! 557 00:19:53,226 --> 00:19:54,904 LOOK, UH... 558 00:19:54,928 --> 00:19:56,772 JUST IN CASE THE BOSS ASKS, 559 00:19:56,796 --> 00:19:58,474 DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL QUALIFICATIONS 560 00:19:58,498 --> 00:19:59,575 THAT MAKE YOU BETTER FOR THE JOB 561 00:19:59,599 --> 00:20:01,110 THAN, YOU KNOW, NATALIE? 562 00:20:01,134 --> 00:20:03,012 I COULD BEAT THE CRAP OUT OF HER. 563 00:20:03,036 --> 00:20:05,748 YEAH, WELL. PHYSICAL SUPERIORITY 564 00:20:05,772 --> 00:20:06,816 IS SOMETHING YOU ALWAYS LOOK FOR 565 00:20:06,840 --> 00:20:08,818 IN A GOOD COSMETIC SALES PERSON. 566 00:20:08,842 --> 00:20:11,709 OW! NOT SO MUCH IN A FRIEND, THOUGH. 567 00:20:15,882 --> 00:20:17,827 WOW, LOOK AT IT COME DOWN. 568 00:20:17,851 --> 00:20:19,294 IS THAT HOT CHOCOLATE READY YET? 569 00:20:19,318 --> 00:20:20,729 COMING RIGHT UP. 570 00:20:20,753 --> 00:20:22,865 REAL NICE OF YOU TO GIVE KATE THAT JOB, DREW. 571 00:20:22,889 --> 00:20:24,533 WELL, YOU KNOW, IT WAS THE ONLY DECENT THING TO DO. 572 00:20:24,557 --> 00:20:25,668 SHE THREATEN YOU? 573 00:20:25,692 --> 00:20:27,091 YEAH. YEAH. 574 00:20:28,728 --> 00:20:31,440 YEAH, DREW, YOU'RE TOO GOOD TO US. 575 00:20:31,464 --> 00:20:33,075 YOU DON'T HAVE ANY PIE?! 576 00:20:33,099 --> 00:20:36,011 YOU CHEAP BASTARD. 577 00:20:39,005 --> 00:20:40,349 AAH! 578 00:20:40,373 --> 00:20:41,650 LOOK SHARP. 579 00:20:41,674 --> 00:20:43,394 EMPLOYED PERSON IN THE ROOM. 580 00:20:44,811 --> 00:20:46,922 HEY, BRAVO! 581 00:20:46,946 --> 00:20:47,923 I NEED YOUR HELP. 582 00:20:47,947 --> 00:20:49,625 I HAVE TO DECIDE WHAT PERFUMES SAMPLES 583 00:20:49,649 --> 00:20:52,027 TO PUSH TOMORROW. 584 00:20:52,051 --> 00:20:54,964 EVENING PASSION... 585 00:20:54,988 --> 00:20:56,732 MORNING MUSK. 586 00:20:56,756 --> 00:20:58,467 WHAT DO YOU HAVE AROUND MIDDAY? 587 00:20:58,491 --> 00:21:01,269 COME ON. HELP ME. 588 00:21:04,631 --> 00:21:06,041 JUST MY LUCK... 589 00:21:06,065 --> 00:21:08,677 I GET THE HAND THAT'S BEEN PETTING THE WET DOG. 590 00:21:08,701 --> 00:21:10,779 YOU'RE NOT HELPING, DREW. 591 00:21:10,803 --> 00:21:14,984 EEEYU! YOU'VE BEEN KISSING THAT DOG, TOO. 592 00:21:15,008 --> 00:21:16,785 GET OUT OF HERE! 593 00:21:16,809 --> 00:21:18,821 YOU KNOW WHAT? 594 00:21:18,845 --> 00:21:20,489 THIS CALLS FOR A CELEBRATION. 595 00:21:20,513 --> 00:21:21,979 SO... 596 00:21:23,282 --> 00:21:24,727 WHO'S COMING WITH ME? 597 00:21:24,751 --> 00:21:26,495 YOU JUST GO AHEAD, BUDDY. 598 00:21:26,519 --> 00:21:27,630 WE'LL WAIT IN HERE. 599 00:21:27,654 --> 00:21:28,964 ALL RIGHT... 600 00:21:28,988 --> 00:21:31,589 BUT YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE MISSING. 601 00:21:37,564 --> 00:21:40,230 LOOK AT THAT DUMB SON OF A GUN. 602 00:21:42,268 --> 00:21:43,979 HEY! HEY! HEY! 603 00:22:08,327 --> 00:22:11,306 CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS. 604 00:22:11,330 --> 00:22:14,330 CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE www.ncicap.org... 41711

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