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1
00:00:14,916 --> 00:00:16,291
Oh.
2
00:00:36,125 --> 00:00:38,708
Toothy! Toothy. Chill out.
3
00:00:38,791 --> 00:00:41,333
It's me, God. Shh.
4
00:00:41,416 --> 00:00:45,333
God? In a cat's body?
Wearing toddler pajamas?
5
00:00:47,416 --> 00:00:50,458
Dude, if you wanted
to have another costume orgy,
6
00:00:50,541 --> 00:00:52,958
I'd have brought
my Winnie the Pooh outfit, man.
7
00:00:53,041 --> 00:00:54,500
Sorry for tricking you.
8
00:00:54,583 --> 00:00:56,916
You know,
normally I'd never abuse tooth code,
9
00:00:57,000 --> 00:00:58,041
but I need a ride.
10
00:00:58,125 --> 00:01:00,541
A ride? To where?
11
00:01:00,625 --> 00:01:03,875
Heaven. I'm getting my job back.
12
00:01:12,375 --> 00:01:15,500
Long story short,
Heaven and Hell are merging.
13
00:01:15,583 --> 00:01:17,500
The boards are picking a new CEO,
14
00:01:17,583 --> 00:01:19,833
and I need to get up there
to throw my hat in the ring.
15
00:01:19,916 --> 00:01:23,250
Oh yeah. The merger.
They're already redoing the offices.
16
00:01:23,333 --> 00:01:27,000
They converted all the toilets
to be open-air experiences.
17
00:01:27,083 --> 00:01:29,333
What? You know about the merger too?
18
00:01:29,416 --> 00:01:30,958
Why didn't Cheryl tell me?
19
00:01:31,041 --> 00:01:34,583
This is why I didn't mention
any assistants in the Bible. Useless.
20
00:01:34,666 --> 00:01:37,833
Hey, maybe I should throw my hat
in the ring to be CEO.
21
00:01:37,916 --> 00:01:41,208
I got lots of good ideas. Like,
you know how people have morning breath?
22
00:01:41,291 --> 00:01:45,125
- What about afternoon breath, huh?
- Uh-huh.
23
00:01:45,208 --> 00:01:49,541
Or what if you could remove your tongue
and rub it on stuff to taste it?
24
00:01:49,625 --> 00:01:51,892
Let's see what else. I've got a...
25
00:01:51,916 --> 00:01:54,208
{\an8}♪...for some trouble
Outside of town ♪
26
00:01:54,291 --> 00:01:57,958
{\an8}♪ Take a hoe for a soul
Who had to go down ♪
27
00:01:58,041 --> 00:02:02,208
♪ But a shovel cost ten
And you only got five ♪
28
00:02:02,291 --> 00:02:05,375
♪ Need a deal that's a steal
Don't you give me no jive ♪
29
00:02:05,458 --> 00:02:06,458
Hmm.
30
00:02:07,333 --> 00:02:14,166
♪ Ain't no shame in whiskey for breakfast
No shame in finding a fair price ♪
31
00:02:14,916 --> 00:02:18,833
♪ Buy your wife that diamond necklace ♪
32
00:02:18,916 --> 00:02:22,416
- ♪ Cubic zirconium will also suffice ♪
- Mmm.
33
00:02:22,500 --> 00:02:24,333
♪ She won't notice believe me, boys ♪
34
00:02:27,291 --> 00:02:29,208
Abbie? You here?
35
00:02:31,708 --> 00:02:32,625
Hey, hon.
36
00:02:32,708 --> 00:02:34,916
This corgi got into
the employee locker room
37
00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:36,916
and ate my favorite sports bra.
38
00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:37,833
What's up?
39
00:02:37,916 --> 00:02:41,000
Grabbed this for dinner.
I figured Greta likes chicken,
40
00:02:41,083 --> 00:02:44,625
and Travis likes things
that have been graphically murdered, so...
41
00:02:44,708 --> 00:02:47,541
Oh. I thought you and I could go out
for dinner.
42
00:02:47,625 --> 00:02:50,083
Maybe that pub
near the comic book store you go to?
43
00:02:50,166 --> 00:02:52,333
I can't. I have to work late.
44
00:02:52,416 --> 00:02:54,833
Our janitor got poached by a rival store
45
00:02:54,916 --> 00:02:57,333
and those vomit puddles
aren't gonna mop themselves.
46
00:02:57,416 --> 00:02:58,916
How about tomorrow night?
47
00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:01,500
Dice rolling symposium at the Game Café.
48
00:03:01,583 --> 00:03:05,000
Wouldn't you rather go have a fun,
romantic adventure with your wife
49
00:03:05,083 --> 00:03:07,500
than play Monopoly with strangers?
50
00:03:07,583 --> 00:03:10,291
Okay. Well, A, I despise Monopoly.
51
00:03:10,375 --> 00:03:14,375
A game where a hat can own a hotel?
That's a bridge too far.
52
00:03:14,458 --> 00:03:18,875
And B, I play games with strangers
because you stopped going with me.
53
00:03:18,958 --> 00:03:21,666
You stopped caring about
everything I like.
54
00:03:21,750 --> 00:03:23,875
Yeah, because I'm not a twelve-year-old.
55
00:03:24,916 --> 00:03:27,041
You know those strangers
you're talking about?
56
00:03:27,125 --> 00:03:29,416
They don't mind
that I get Spider-Man henna.
57
00:03:29,500 --> 00:03:32,458
They actually like the person I am.
58
00:03:32,541 --> 00:03:34,291
Ooh.
59
00:03:42,291 --> 00:03:44,500
Yes, achievement unlocked.
60
00:03:44,583 --> 00:03:47,291
Fifty grand worth of Beanie Baby NFTs.
61
00:03:49,250 --> 00:03:51,458
Oh, hey, guys. What's going on?
62
00:03:51,541 --> 00:03:54,583
Do we have a rumble today
with another gang I didn't know about?
63
00:03:57,541 --> 00:03:59,291
Aidan? What do you want?
64
00:03:59,375 --> 00:04:02,166
Shut up, you two-faced r... r... rat boy.
65
00:04:02,250 --> 00:04:05,875
Aidan told me that you're always
making f... fun of my internet connection.
66
00:04:05,958 --> 00:04:10,208
It's not my fault
my area only has S... Spectrum.
67
00:04:10,291 --> 00:04:12,583
Aidan, that was a private convo.
68
00:04:12,666 --> 00:04:16,916
Guess you're too stupid to get it.
We're kicking you off our team.
69
00:04:25,416 --> 00:04:27,458
Even you, KingBallSack?
70
00:04:39,250 --> 00:04:41,125
You turned our whole team against me?
71
00:04:41,208 --> 00:04:46,166
I've been through enough family court
to know custody is about who acts first.
72
00:04:46,250 --> 00:04:48,416
Unless both parties refuse custody,
73
00:04:48,500 --> 00:04:51,500
but then the stenographer
will usually give you a ride home.
74
00:04:51,583 --> 00:04:54,625
Face it, I won and you lost, jerk.
75
00:04:54,708 --> 00:04:58,458
Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!
Fight! Fight! Fight!
76
00:04:59,083 --> 00:04:59,916
Kick his ass!
77
00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:01,458
Fight!
78
00:05:01,541 --> 00:05:03,291
Um, I don't really fight.
79
00:05:03,375 --> 00:05:06,250
Uh, I make love, not war.
80
00:05:32,208 --> 00:05:33,791
Ah, come on, seriously?
81
00:05:33,875 --> 00:05:35,916
I swear it's just the fillings.
82
00:05:46,875 --> 00:05:48,125
Hold it right there.
83
00:05:48,833 --> 00:05:50,833
God! Um... Hi, we were just...
84
00:05:50,916 --> 00:05:53,250
I know exactly what you were just.
85
00:05:53,750 --> 00:05:55,791
You sent me to Earth
to get me out of the way,
86
00:05:55,875 --> 00:05:59,250
so you could negotiate a merger,
didn't you? Didn't you?
87
00:05:59,333 --> 00:06:01,000
Fine. You got us.
88
00:06:01,083 --> 00:06:04,000
But look, that doesn't make the reason
we sent you down any less true.
89
00:06:04,083 --> 00:06:05,000
Exactly.
90
00:06:05,083 --> 00:06:07,583
You have been phoning it in for years.
91
00:06:07,666 --> 00:06:10,750
And look at what humans did
when left to their own devices.
92
00:06:10,833 --> 00:06:14,333
They spent a decade trying
to line up candy on their phones.
93
00:06:14,416 --> 00:06:15,666
You know what?
94
00:06:17,916 --> 00:06:20,166
Ooh. You're right.
95
00:06:20,250 --> 00:06:21,500
Huh?
96
00:06:21,583 --> 00:06:24,916
I saw humans going astray,
and I didn't care.
97
00:06:25,666 --> 00:06:27,875
But something happened down on Earth.
98
00:06:27,958 --> 00:06:31,500
At first, I was helping humans
just to get back up to Heaven.
99
00:06:31,583 --> 00:06:37,291
But after a while, I started to help them
because I actually cared about them.
100
00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:43,875
Like, all humans? Even the ones
who take their shoes off on airplanes?
101
00:06:43,958 --> 00:06:46,291
Crazy as it seems, yeah.
102
00:06:46,916 --> 00:06:50,208
You have to care about these idiots
if you're going to help them,
103
00:06:50,708 --> 00:06:53,041
and I'm the only one who does.
104
00:06:53,125 --> 00:06:57,125
So you should pick me as the new leader.
105
00:06:57,208 --> 00:07:00,208
What? No!
He's the reason we're in this mess!
106
00:07:00,291 --> 00:07:03,708
- Just hire me and then we can...
- I think we should consider him.
107
00:07:04,416 --> 00:07:07,291
I propose we do what gods have been doing
108
00:07:07,375 --> 00:07:10,541
for control of the universe
for millions of years.
109
00:07:10,625 --> 00:07:12,083
God Games!
110
00:07:13,750 --> 00:07:16,833
- You can't be serious.
- Those haven't been done in ages.
111
00:07:16,916 --> 00:07:18,392
- Think of the ratings.
- So barbaric.
112
00:07:18,416 --> 00:07:19,875
Juggernaut guaranteed.
113
00:07:19,958 --> 00:07:21,833
Could you, uh, give us a moment?
114
00:07:24,250 --> 00:07:25,708
What the heck are you doing?
115
00:07:25,791 --> 00:07:30,541
Beelzebub,
no one in Hell respects you.
116
00:07:30,625 --> 00:07:34,125
Remember that feces sprayed on the hood
of your car in the parking lot?
117
00:07:34,833 --> 00:07:36,916
A guy in accounting did that.
118
00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:39,458
You told me
one of the gargoyles had IBS!
119
00:07:39,541 --> 00:07:43,625
And they don't respect you
because this job was given to you.
120
00:07:43,708 --> 00:07:46,916
If you don't face legitimate competition,
121
00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:49,125
well, it'll just be more of the same.
122
00:07:49,208 --> 00:07:50,500
It's settled.
123
00:07:50,583 --> 00:07:51,916
You two will compete.
124
00:07:53,625 --> 00:07:58,125
Don't forget the other tradition
of the God Games, your mortal advisor.
125
00:07:58,208 --> 00:08:02,958
Every god contestant must work
alongside a mortal of their choice.
126
00:08:03,041 --> 00:08:06,208
Okay, here we go.
Classic two-party system.
127
00:08:06,291 --> 00:08:08,125
Why don't you change it up for once?
128
00:08:08,208 --> 00:08:11,375
Include an orthodontic enthusiast
with fresh ideas?
129
00:08:11,458 --> 00:08:13,375
Oh, for the love... Fine.
130
00:08:13,458 --> 00:08:15,583
We'll allow a handful
of other candidates too.
131
00:08:15,666 --> 00:08:17,958
Let it be known across the universe!
132
00:08:18,041 --> 00:08:21,083
God Games shall commence!
133
00:08:21,166 --> 00:08:23,083
Commence!
134
00:08:26,541 --> 00:08:28,166
Commence!
135
00:08:29,791 --> 00:08:31,375
{\an8}Commence!
136
00:08:36,333 --> 00:08:38,291
Commence!
137
00:08:38,916 --> 00:08:41,416
You have one hour
to go back down to Earth,
138
00:08:41,500 --> 00:08:42,958
choose your mortal advisor,
139
00:08:43,041 --> 00:08:45,541
and then you'll be transported
back for the games.
140
00:08:51,375 --> 00:08:53,750
Ugh. Could that ride be any bumpier?
141
00:08:53,833 --> 00:08:56,083
That's the first thing I'm fixing
when I'm CEO.
142
00:08:56,166 --> 00:08:59,458
That and the stench up there,
like a rotting strawberry.
143
00:08:59,541 --> 00:09:02,833
Yeah, a fairy died
in an AC vent a few years back
144
00:09:02,916 --> 00:09:03,958
and we can't find him.
145
00:09:04,041 --> 00:09:07,541
Oh, awfully convenient that
when you're about to lose your job,
146
00:09:07,625 --> 00:09:09,208
you suddenly care about Earth.
147
00:09:09,291 --> 00:09:10,958
You're the one who invented the plague
148
00:09:11,041 --> 00:09:13,041
because you wanted to cut back
on your hours.
149
00:09:13,125 --> 00:09:16,416
Well, you're the one who tricked me
into showing you how to do a job
150
00:09:16,500 --> 00:09:18,500
you're wildly underqualified for.
151
00:09:18,583 --> 00:09:21,458
You, madam, are the Kelly to my Regis.
152
00:09:22,625 --> 00:09:23,625
It's on.
153
00:09:23,708 --> 00:09:24,916
I'm gonna win this thing
154
00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:28,416
and keep you from ruining my creation,
no matter what.
155
00:09:29,291 --> 00:09:33,625
And now, I just need to find the smartest
and best human on Earth.
156
00:09:33,708 --> 00:09:36,333
Maybe a brain surgeon
or a nuclear physicist.
157
00:09:36,416 --> 00:09:38,833
Or that Papa John's guy,
you know who I mean.
158
00:09:38,916 --> 00:09:41,500
He looks like Dracula got Botox,
then drowned.
159
00:09:41,583 --> 00:09:44,583
Hey, whatcha working on?
160
00:09:44,666 --> 00:09:46,250
To combat human-driven climate change,
161
00:09:46,333 --> 00:09:48,500
I'm breeding a squirrel
that absorbs carbon.
162
00:09:48,583 --> 00:09:51,166
Only tough part is getting a squirrel
to mate with a tree.
163
00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:55,166
- But I have a solution.
- Gosh, you're so smart.
164
00:09:55,250 --> 00:09:57,958
Plus, I love that outfit.
Where did you get it?
165
00:09:58,916 --> 00:10:01,583
Okay, listen. Heaven and Hell are merging.
166
00:10:01,666 --> 00:10:05,458
They're going to pick a new CEO
using an age-old God competition.
167
00:10:05,541 --> 00:10:07,958
I'm going up against Godcat
and some other candidates.
168
00:10:08,041 --> 00:10:10,833
We each get to have a human advisor,
169
00:10:10,916 --> 00:10:12,583
and I'd like you to be mine.
170
00:10:13,083 --> 00:10:15,000
Why should I help you and not Godcat?
171
00:10:15,083 --> 00:10:18,875
Okay, well, I have a bachelor's degree
in trickery and deception.
172
00:10:18,958 --> 00:10:20,000
From where?
173
00:10:20,083 --> 00:10:21,166
Arizona State.
174
00:10:21,250 --> 00:10:22,250
Pass.
175
00:10:22,291 --> 00:10:24,250
What if I put you on the board?
176
00:10:24,333 --> 00:10:26,250
You could rewrite the laws of physics
177
00:10:26,333 --> 00:10:31,333
or create those carbon squirrels
by making trees hornier. Huh? Huh?
178
00:10:31,416 --> 00:10:35,000
Well, you are a good candidate,
and Godcat hasn't been a very good leader,
179
00:10:35,083 --> 00:10:37,041
and I did like the part
where you bribed me.
180
00:10:37,125 --> 00:10:38,125
Okay, I'm in.
181
00:10:39,916 --> 00:10:41,125
What the hell was that?
182
00:11:23,750 --> 00:11:25,125
Marvelous Bulkington?
183
00:11:25,750 --> 00:11:28,083
I'm Agent Tatum. This is Agent Brown.
184
00:11:28,166 --> 00:11:29,583
We're feds.
185
00:11:29,666 --> 00:11:32,708
Feds? Like FBI agents?
186
00:11:32,791 --> 00:11:38,250
Did we say FBI? No, we're
from the Food and Drug Administration.
187
00:11:38,333 --> 00:11:41,708
We're federal agents too, you know.
The FBI doesn't own the word.
188
00:11:41,791 --> 00:11:44,958
We have reason to believe
the organic chicken meat you sell here
189
00:11:45,041 --> 00:11:46,458
is actually pigeon meat.
190
00:11:46,541 --> 00:11:49,375
What? That's absurd. I was just...
191
00:11:50,666 --> 00:11:52,083
That's not all.
192
00:11:52,166 --> 00:11:55,125
We also have reason
to believe Big Bulk is involved
193
00:11:55,208 --> 00:11:57,125
in all sorts of crimes.
194
00:11:57,208 --> 00:11:59,958
Money laundering, counterfeit cheesing,
195
00:12:00,041 --> 00:12:02,375
hard to hear loudspeakers,
196
00:12:02,458 --> 00:12:04,625
unflattering lighting!
197
00:12:04,708 --> 00:12:06,958
Are those last ones even crimes?
198
00:12:07,041 --> 00:12:10,958
Ooh.
Looks like we got a lawyer on our hands.
199
00:12:11,041 --> 00:12:14,833
Well, counselor, I'll have you know
those are drummed-up charges,
200
00:12:14,916 --> 00:12:16,333
which are the worst kind.
201
00:12:16,916 --> 00:12:21,000
But we'll consider dropping them
if you're willing to... cooperate.
202
00:12:21,083 --> 00:12:22,625
Me, cooperate?
203
00:12:22,708 --> 00:12:26,458
Well, Mr. Bulkington,
you're CEO, aren't you?
204
00:12:26,541 --> 00:12:29,083
Then the buck stops with you.
205
00:12:29,166 --> 00:12:31,833
{\an8}Now, we have a warrant here
to search the premises,
206
00:12:31,916 --> 00:12:35,291
{\an8}and, uh... Ugh! You didn't get it signed!
207
00:12:35,375 --> 00:12:38,166
Oh. So now I'm in charge
of the a cappella group
208
00:12:38,250 --> 00:12:39,666
and getting warrants signed?
209
00:12:39,750 --> 00:12:41,125
Well, this is a bit awkward,
210
00:12:41,208 --> 00:12:45,333
but you wouldn't be willing
to let us look around without a warrant,
211
00:12:45,416 --> 00:12:48,625
would you? To like, uh, do us a solid?
212
00:12:48,708 --> 00:12:50,916
Um... No?
213
00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:53,083
We'll be back in the morning.
214
00:12:59,000 --> 00:13:03,625
Oh, no. Here's another handwritten receipt
from Big Bulk to Herb Bulkington.
215
00:13:03,708 --> 00:13:07,791
This one is for ten thousand copies
of an album called Rhythm in Bulk.
216
00:13:07,875 --> 00:13:12,250
And you better sit down for this one.
The store paid a million bucks for it.
217
00:13:12,333 --> 00:13:14,333
Well, it's very listenable.
218
00:13:14,416 --> 00:13:17,958
Oh man, this is bad.
The feds are coming back in the morning.
219
00:13:18,041 --> 00:13:20,125
If there's anything
that incriminates Big Bulk,
220
00:13:20,208 --> 00:13:22,166
{\an8}we got to find it before...
221
00:13:23,333 --> 00:13:26,000
Hi, hon. I brought ice cream.
222
00:13:26,500 --> 00:13:28,708
Whoa. What happened in here?
223
00:13:28,791 --> 00:13:33,000
Um, oh, nothing you should be compelled
to acknowledge knowing about under oath.
224
00:13:33,083 --> 00:13:35,291
I mean,
this is just how Dad kept his office.
225
00:13:35,375 --> 00:13:36,875
Isn't that right, Percy?
226
00:13:36,958 --> 00:13:40,500
I have never been in this office,
nor am I here now. Excuse me.
227
00:13:42,875 --> 00:13:44,083
What was that about?
228
00:13:44,166 --> 00:13:47,583
Oh, you know Percy.
Lost his arm in a trash compactor.
229
00:13:47,666 --> 00:13:50,416
Lost his mind
huffing Glade plugins.
230
00:13:50,500 --> 00:13:52,958
This isn't a great time, Abbie.
You should go.
231
00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:55,583
Marv, honey, I owe you an apology.
232
00:13:55,666 --> 00:13:57,833
{\an8}Accepted. Okay, I should get back...
233
00:13:59,708 --> 00:14:00,958
{\an8}When we got married,
234
00:14:01,041 --> 00:14:04,208
{\an8}I figured we'd be one of those fun,
exciting couples,
235
00:14:04,291 --> 00:14:08,458
like Mr. and Mrs. Smith or Bones
and her boyfriend with the giant face.
236
00:14:08,541 --> 00:14:10,041
And over time,
237
00:14:10,125 --> 00:14:14,375
I got frustrated I wasn't accomplishing
Mission Perfect Marriage.
238
00:14:14,458 --> 00:14:18,041
And now
I'm seeing how far we've drifted apart,
239
00:14:18,125 --> 00:14:22,291
but I want us to drift back to each other
because I love you.
240
00:14:25,791 --> 00:14:28,250
{\an8}Okay. Drive safe. Bye-bye, now.
241
00:14:37,250 --> 00:14:38,250
Hmm.
242
00:14:52,666 --> 00:14:55,041
I shouldn't have had
Korean tacos for lunch.
243
00:15:11,125 --> 00:15:13,500
Oh, would you come on already?
244
00:15:17,625 --> 00:15:22,208
For the last time, I don't wanna be
in some stupid competition!
245
00:15:22,291 --> 00:15:25,625
There's an online petition
to have my citizenship revoked.
246
00:15:25,708 --> 00:15:27,083
Where would I go?
247
00:15:27,166 --> 00:15:30,916
I don't speak Spanish at all,
and I can barely speak Cuban.
248
00:15:36,500 --> 00:15:38,458
Now you listen to me, young man.
249
00:15:38,541 --> 00:15:42,875
You've got all the traits we need
to win this thing. You're good at games.
250
00:15:42,958 --> 00:15:48,833
You're free for the next couple of hours.
You're currently near me. You can do this!
251
00:15:48,916 --> 00:15:49,916
What do you say?
252
00:15:52,750 --> 00:15:54,875
Up you get.
253
00:16:01,666 --> 00:16:07,750
God Games! God Games!
God Games! God Games! God Games!
254
00:16:07,833 --> 00:16:11,166
God Games! God Games! God Games!
255
00:16:26,250 --> 00:16:28,250
Rudolph, with your nose so bright,
256
00:16:28,833 --> 00:16:31,791
won't you eat my fists tonight?
257
00:16:31,875 --> 00:16:35,500
For your sake, I hope they have
a good funeral home in Flavortown.
258
00:16:44,500 --> 00:16:47,416
Welcome to God Games!
259
00:16:47,500 --> 00:16:53,500
The ultimate test of the qualifications
of a deity in mind and spirit.
260
00:16:53,583 --> 00:16:55,250
Now let the games begin.
261
00:17:23,541 --> 00:17:26,125
Whoa-ho! Good advising, Travis. Well done.
262
00:17:33,125 --> 00:17:36,666
Strange, without any calculating,
I just felt this urge to save you.
263
00:17:36,750 --> 00:17:38,041
Huh!
264
00:17:50,750 --> 00:17:54,833
God Games! God Games!
God Games! God Games! God Games!
265
00:17:58,125 --> 00:17:59,726
♪ And a man's gotta learn to take it... ♪
266
00:18:00,708 --> 00:18:03,125
♪ Try to believe
Though the going gets rough ♪
267
00:18:03,208 --> 00:18:05,500
♪ That you gotta hang tough to make it... ♪
268
00:18:05,583 --> 00:18:08,166
Not like this. Not again!
269
00:18:11,166 --> 00:18:15,333
{\an8}♪ Never doubt that you're the one
And you can have your dreams... ♪
270
00:18:15,416 --> 00:18:16,791
♪ You're the best around... ♪
271
00:18:16,875 --> 00:18:18,791
Great British Bake-Off?
272
00:18:18,875 --> 00:18:19,875
Humans love it.
273
00:18:19,916 --> 00:18:21,708
Guess it's like a cozy blanket
274
00:18:21,791 --> 00:18:25,750
when your planet is full
of wildfires and monkeypox...
275
00:18:25,833 --> 00:18:28,458
♪ You're the best around ♪
276
00:18:29,041 --> 00:18:31,541
♪ Nothing's gonna ever keep you down... ♪
277
00:18:36,500 --> 00:18:37,416
♪ Fight 'til the end... ♪
278
00:18:38,916 --> 00:18:41,208
{\an8}♪ On the strength
That you have inside you ♪
279
00:18:41,291 --> 00:18:43,958
{\an8}♪ Ah, gotta be proud
Standing out in the crowd ♪
280
00:18:44,041 --> 00:18:46,583
{\an8}♪ When the odds and the game defy you ♪
281
00:18:46,666 --> 00:18:49,750
♪ Try your best to win them all
And one day time will tell... ♪
282
00:18:51,625 --> 00:18:53,625
{\an8}♪ When you're the one
That's standing there ♪
283
00:18:56,541 --> 00:18:57,875
♪ You're the best... ♪
284
00:18:57,958 --> 00:18:58,958
Yeah!
285
00:18:59,625 --> 00:19:01,708
♪ Nothing's gonna ever keep you down ♪
286
00:19:01,791 --> 00:19:04,208
♪ You're the best around... ♪
287
00:19:05,416 --> 00:19:06,541
Flavortown!
288
00:19:07,291 --> 00:19:08,500
Donkey sauce!
289
00:19:09,791 --> 00:19:15,500
♪ Nothing's gonna ever keep you down... ♪
290
00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:29,000
Mmm, mmm, mmm.
291
00:19:34,833 --> 00:19:36,250
That's it, folks.
292
00:19:36,333 --> 00:19:39,125
We're down to our last two competitors
who'll compete in the finale
293
00:19:39,208 --> 00:19:40,416
for all the marbles.
294
00:19:40,500 --> 00:19:44,583
We are going to take a short intermission,
so go refill your sixteen-dollar beers.
295
00:19:44,666 --> 00:19:46,083
You won't wanna miss this.
296
00:19:46,791 --> 00:19:47,708
Yeah!
297
00:19:47,791 --> 00:19:50,083
♪ You're the best around ♪
298
00:19:50,166 --> 00:19:52,541
♪ Nothing's gonna ever keep you down... ♪
299
00:20:02,250 --> 00:20:03,375
Abbie?
300
00:20:07,375 --> 00:20:08,500
Who's there?
301
00:20:15,500 --> 00:20:16,666
Herb?
302
00:20:16,750 --> 00:20:19,916
God, what a year it's been.
303
00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:24,000
One minute you pass out with a DiGiorno
in the oven and burn down Heaven,
304
00:20:24,083 --> 00:20:26,750
and the next you're competing
to be CEO again.
305
00:20:26,833 --> 00:20:29,458
How have you made it this far
in the competition?
306
00:20:29,541 --> 00:20:32,458
First and foremost,
my faith in me. I am good,
307
00:20:32,541 --> 00:20:35,750
and I don't give myself anything more
than I can handle in one day.
308
00:20:35,833 --> 00:20:38,375
I'm also currently on steroids
309
00:20:38,458 --> 00:20:41,958
to treat the worms I got
from lick-washing my genitals.
310
00:20:42,041 --> 00:20:43,375
That's great.
311
00:20:43,875 --> 00:20:47,291
And Beelzebub, big year for Hell too.
312
00:20:47,375 --> 00:20:50,041
You launched a new non-alcoholic vodka.
313
00:20:50,125 --> 00:20:52,375
Your company, Spirit Airlines,
314
00:20:52,458 --> 00:20:54,958
started packing children
into overhead bins.
315
00:20:55,041 --> 00:20:58,166
Then you're sent to Earth in a cat's body.
316
00:20:58,250 --> 00:21:01,125
{\an8}I have to ask, who dressed you tonight?
317
00:21:01,208 --> 00:21:04,041
{\an8}Are you serious?
That's the question you're asking me?
318
00:21:04,125 --> 00:21:06,041
Okay, I think we got it. Thanks.
319
00:21:06,541 --> 00:21:07,958
Yeah!
320
00:21:09,833 --> 00:21:11,416
Good job.
321
00:21:11,500 --> 00:21:12,541
You too.
322
00:21:13,125 --> 00:21:16,041
Look, whatever happens out there,
if I win,
323
00:21:16,125 --> 00:21:19,083
there'll always be a place for you
in the company.
324
00:21:19,166 --> 00:21:22,125
- Do you know anything about running HR?
- Don't be an idiot.
325
00:21:22,208 --> 00:21:24,625
You can't have me around
if you're running things
326
00:21:24,708 --> 00:21:25,708
and vice versa.
327
00:21:26,166 --> 00:21:28,125
So this is...
328
00:21:28,208 --> 00:21:31,083
Yes, this is it...
329
00:21:31,791 --> 00:21:33,791
like it it.
330
00:21:35,416 --> 00:21:36,500
Okay. Let's focus.
331
00:21:36,583 --> 00:21:39,333
I've cross-referenced every competition
in the God Games archives.
332
00:21:39,416 --> 00:21:42,625
Typically, the final event involves
a team challenge with your advisor.
333
00:21:42,708 --> 00:21:44,666
Famously, Hercules was teamed
with a pterodactyl
334
00:21:44,750 --> 00:21:45,875
who chewed his legs off.
335
00:21:45,958 --> 00:21:48,250
Now, I think we should...
336
00:21:49,041 --> 00:21:50,541
Why do you keep vomiting?
337
00:21:50,625 --> 00:21:53,416
I don't know.
I've been feeling off for a while.
338
00:21:53,500 --> 00:21:56,708
I keep throwing up,
my nipples are sore and discolored.
339
00:21:56,791 --> 00:22:00,583
I'm bloated. I missed my period.
Must be a virus going around.
340
00:22:00,666 --> 00:22:02,375
Um... Or you're pregnant?
341
00:22:02,458 --> 00:22:03,708
Geez. How bad was that Incubus
342
00:22:03,791 --> 00:22:05,875
at describing the birds
and the bees to you?
343
00:22:05,958 --> 00:22:09,000
Pregnant? That is insane.
344
00:22:09,083 --> 00:22:11,500
I can't be pregnant. I haven't even...
345
00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:12,833
Oh no.
346
00:22:15,083 --> 00:22:16,750
♪ If I lay here... ♪
347
00:22:19,250 --> 00:22:21,416
♪ If I just lay here... ♪
348
00:22:21,500 --> 00:22:23,166
Oh God.
27899
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