All language subtitles for The Patrick Star Show s01e13 Nitwit Neighborhood News.eng
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1
00:00:06,666 --> 00:00:08,363
- Hi! I'm Patrick Star!
2
00:00:08,450 --> 00:00:11,366
And I live with my parents!
3
00:00:11,453 --> 00:00:13,934
Ow!
This is my dad!
4
00:00:16,110 --> 00:00:19,548
This is my mom!
5
00:00:19,635 --> 00:00:22,072
This is my sister!
She's shy.
6
00:00:22,159 --> 00:00:24,249
This is my grandpa!
7
00:00:24,336 --> 00:00:26,947
This is my room!
8
00:00:27,034 --> 00:00:29,906
And this...
9
00:00:29,993 --> 00:00:33,475
This is my show!
10
00:00:33,562 --> 00:00:35,216
[upbeat music]
11
00:00:39,046 --> 00:00:41,875
- [munches loudly]
12
00:00:43,790 --> 00:00:47,184
Good morning, and welcome
to "Star Inaction News."
13
00:00:47,272 --> 00:00:48,969
In today's household news--
14
00:00:49,056 --> 00:00:50,884
[grunts]
Huh?
15
00:00:50,971 --> 00:00:54,017
Dad is stuck on top
of the refrigerator again.
16
00:00:54,104 --> 00:00:56,890
- [whimpers]
17
00:00:56,977 --> 00:00:59,414
- Come on, Mr. Star.
Jump!
18
00:00:59,501 --> 00:01:02,112
- Don't worry, Cecil!
We'll catch you!
19
00:01:02,199 --> 00:01:05,594
- Uh-uh!
It's scary!
20
00:01:05,681 --> 00:01:09,076
- A mysterious
cookie jar theft has...
21
00:01:09,163 --> 00:01:10,120
[munches loudly]
22
00:01:10,207 --> 00:01:12,732
Rocked the Star household!
23
00:01:12,819 --> 00:01:13,472
Huh?
24
00:01:17,780 --> 00:01:21,915
And a laundry pile-up causes
a clean underwear shortage!
25
00:01:22,002 --> 00:01:23,569
Hmm?
26
00:01:23,656 --> 00:01:25,266
[buzzes]
Ooh.
27
00:01:25,353 --> 00:01:29,401
We have incoming breaking news!
28
00:01:29,488 --> 00:01:31,968
The upstairs bathtub drain
is clogged!
29
00:01:32,055 --> 00:01:34,928
Already on the scene
is our roving reporter,
30
00:01:35,015 --> 00:01:37,017
Patrick, uh...
31
00:01:37,104 --> 00:01:38,584
Stair!
- Star!
32
00:01:38,671 --> 00:01:40,412
Patrick Star!
33
00:01:40,499 --> 00:01:43,980
- That's what I said!
Snootrick Spar.
34
00:01:44,067 --> 00:01:45,547
Thanks, Patrick.
35
00:01:45,634 --> 00:01:48,420
First responders are
tackling the problem!
36
00:01:52,380 --> 00:01:54,687
Whoa.
- [grunts]
37
00:01:54,774 --> 00:01:57,603
This looks like
a hairy situation.
38
00:01:57,690 --> 00:01:59,735
[grunts]
39
00:01:59,822 --> 00:02:02,172
- Ow!
[grunts]
40
00:02:02,259 --> 00:02:05,611
- Oh, it would appear
the clog is just an old coot.
41
00:02:05,698 --> 00:02:09,615
- I got lost on the way
to the race track!
42
00:02:09,702 --> 00:02:12,966
[grunts]
43
00:02:13,053 --> 00:02:16,099
Out of my way, looky-loos!
The derby's about to begin!
44
00:02:16,186 --> 00:02:18,406
Hyah!
[neighs]
45
00:02:18,493 --> 00:02:20,365
- And now, we go live
to the fourth race
46
00:02:20,452 --> 00:02:22,758
of the Coffee Pot derby!
47
00:02:22,845 --> 00:02:24,934
Take it away, Cecil.
- Thanks, son!
48
00:02:25,021 --> 00:02:27,067
The seahorses are
at the starting gate.
49
00:02:27,154 --> 00:02:28,721
And they're off!
50
00:02:28,808 --> 00:02:30,375
Friendly Barnacle
has a fast start,
51
00:02:30,462 --> 00:02:32,507
but now, Coral Face Fanny
takes the lead.
52
00:02:32,594 --> 00:02:34,422
But what's this?
Coming up on the outside rail
53
00:02:34,509 --> 00:02:35,989
are Big Boy
and the Little Wonder!
54
00:02:36,076 --> 00:02:39,601
- How does it feel to be
distracted from the race?
55
00:02:39,688 --> 00:02:42,212
- Scram, you scandal monger!
[grunts]
56
00:02:42,299 --> 00:02:45,433
- They're coming down
the hallway, past the credenza.
57
00:02:45,520 --> 00:02:47,609
GrandPat takes the lead
into the basement,
58
00:02:47,696 --> 00:02:50,307
around the boiler,
and into the kitchen!
59
00:02:50,395 --> 00:02:52,919
- [panting]
Ow, cramp!
60
00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:55,878
[both grunt]
61
00:02:55,965 --> 00:02:59,839
- What did I say about playing
reporter inside of this house?
62
00:02:59,926 --> 00:03:02,363
Go outside
and report in the street!
63
00:03:02,450 --> 00:03:03,886
It's safer.
64
00:03:03,973 --> 00:03:07,194
- Aw, now we have
to find new news!
65
00:03:07,281 --> 00:03:10,415
- Well, Squidina, if you want
to find a good scoop,
66
00:03:10,502 --> 00:03:12,765
you have to dig deep!
67
00:03:12,852 --> 00:03:14,027
[grunts]
68
00:03:14,114 --> 00:03:15,985
- Whoo-hoo!
69
00:03:16,072 --> 00:03:19,119
- [hums]
70
00:03:19,206 --> 00:03:20,903
[cackles]
Bam!
71
00:03:20,990 --> 00:03:23,732
- And now, it's time
for Geezer Gardening Tips!
72
00:03:23,819 --> 00:03:25,212
- Huh? Ow!
73
00:03:25,299 --> 00:03:27,301
- What you got growing, Granny?
74
00:03:27,388 --> 00:03:30,217
- Oh!
[growls]
75
00:03:30,304 --> 00:03:35,048
I've nurtured these beautiful
flowers from bulb to blossom,
76
00:03:35,135 --> 00:03:37,311
but I'm ripping 'em out
77
00:03:37,398 --> 00:03:41,620
and replacing them
with pest-resistant plants...
78
00:03:41,707 --> 00:03:43,404
[cackles]
79
00:03:43,491 --> 00:03:46,320
That keep out pesky reporters.
80
00:03:46,407 --> 00:03:48,017
- Oh!
- [giggles]
81
00:03:48,104 --> 00:03:51,325
Now that's
how you get rid of pests!
82
00:03:51,412 --> 00:03:52,457
- Whoa!
- [cackles]
83
00:03:52,544 --> 00:03:54,328
- Huh?
- Ew!
84
00:03:54,415 --> 00:03:56,461
- [munches loudly, cackles]
85
00:03:56,548 --> 00:03:59,028
- [grunts]
"Inaction News"!
86
00:03:59,115 --> 00:04:00,290
- Rolling your way!
87
00:04:00,377 --> 00:04:02,249
[both whimper shakily]
88
00:04:02,336 --> 00:04:04,294
[all grunt]
89
00:04:04,381 --> 00:04:05,905
- Pardon me, sir.
90
00:04:05,992 --> 00:04:08,821
What are your views
of the shorts shortage?
91
00:04:08,908 --> 00:04:11,084
- Oh, I wish
I could talk, Patrick,
92
00:04:11,171 --> 00:04:14,130
but I'm waiting for
my first-ever driving lesson!
93
00:04:14,217 --> 00:04:15,218
[giggles]
94
00:04:15,305 --> 00:04:17,699
- Hello, SpongeBob.
95
00:04:17,786 --> 00:04:20,354
Are you ready
for your first lesson?
96
00:04:20,441 --> 00:04:21,747
- Oh, yes, Mrs. Puff.
97
00:04:21,834 --> 00:04:25,881
I've memorized
the entire handbook,
98
00:04:25,968 --> 00:04:28,014
from avoiding
windshield wiper hypnosis
99
00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:31,496
to stifling a sneeze
at a four-way stop.
100
00:04:31,583 --> 00:04:34,760
- This is the perfect
opportunity for a ride-along!
101
00:04:34,847 --> 00:04:36,501
- [panting]
Oopsie.
102
00:04:36,588 --> 00:04:38,198
- Excuse me. Press.
103
00:04:38,285 --> 00:04:40,243
- Oh, my. No.
104
00:04:40,330 --> 00:04:43,812
SpongeBob isn't licensed
to carry passengers.
105
00:04:43,899 --> 00:04:47,729
- No problem.
He can use my license!
106
00:04:49,862 --> 00:04:52,125
- Would you please just go?
107
00:04:52,212 --> 00:04:53,909
- You got it, Mrs. Puff!
108
00:04:53,996 --> 00:04:55,041
both: Whoa!
- Whoo-hoo!
109
00:04:55,128 --> 00:04:56,433
- Ah!
110
00:04:56,521 --> 00:04:58,348
- [giggles]
111
00:04:58,435 --> 00:05:00,655
- So what are your thoughts
on the current state
112
00:05:00,742 --> 00:05:02,614
of the autoboative industry?
113
00:05:02,701 --> 00:05:06,095
- I think I can best
express myself through poetry.
114
00:05:06,182 --> 00:05:07,270
Ahem.
115
00:05:07,357 --> 00:05:09,664
? Tires go round,
engines go putt ?
116
00:05:09,751 --> 00:05:11,840
? Fall out of the boat,
and you'll land on your-- ?
117
00:05:11,927 --> 00:05:13,538
- Butt out, Patrick!
118
00:05:13,625 --> 00:05:16,541
You're distracting my student.
119
00:05:16,628 --> 00:05:17,977
- Mrs. Poofy!
- [grunts]
120
00:05:18,064 --> 00:05:19,935
- Do you think we'll see
an exciting boat crash?
121
00:05:20,022 --> 00:05:23,156
- I'm afraid
we'll be in a boat crash!
122
00:05:23,243 --> 00:05:25,767
- Oh, I'll need a better angle
for that.
123
00:05:25,854 --> 00:05:29,379
- [gasps]
Have you lost your mind?
124
00:05:29,466 --> 00:05:32,948
- Don't worry.
I have my seat belt on.
125
00:05:33,035 --> 00:05:34,950
- You're blocking
the driver's view.
126
00:05:35,037 --> 00:05:37,518
- It's okay.
I can see around her.
127
00:05:37,605 --> 00:05:40,652
[groans]
128
00:05:40,739 --> 00:05:43,480
Ouch!
Eye cramp!
129
00:05:43,568 --> 00:05:45,395
all: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
130
00:05:45,482 --> 00:05:48,181
[all screaming]
131
00:05:48,268 --> 00:05:51,445
- And the pack pushes
past the Porous Peril
132
00:05:51,532 --> 00:05:53,142
into the straightaway!
133
00:05:53,229 --> 00:05:55,971
[all scream]
134
00:05:59,279 --> 00:06:00,846
- [screams]
135
00:06:00,933 --> 00:06:03,239
Hit the brakes!
136
00:06:03,326 --> 00:06:05,111
- If you say so.
137
00:06:05,198 --> 00:06:06,155
[grunts]
138
00:06:06,242 --> 00:06:08,157
[tires squeal]
139
00:06:10,638 --> 00:06:11,639
- [sighs in relief]
140
00:06:15,164 --> 00:06:17,732
That's it!
141
00:06:17,819 --> 00:06:19,081
[both grunt]
- Whoa!
142
00:06:22,084 --> 00:06:23,477
How'd I do, Mrs. Puff?
143
00:06:23,564 --> 00:06:24,826
- [sighs]
144
00:06:24,913 --> 00:06:28,787
Well, that was
lesson number one.
145
00:06:28,874 --> 00:06:31,790
Next week,
lesson number one.
146
00:06:34,227 --> 00:06:36,708
- [growls]
147
00:06:36,795 --> 00:06:39,580
- Hey!
- Ooh.
148
00:06:39,667 --> 00:06:42,017
That guy must be a celebrity!
149
00:06:42,104 --> 00:06:43,976
He covered his face
with a ski mask
150
00:06:44,063 --> 00:06:46,500
so he won't be noticed
by pepperoni!
151
00:06:46,587 --> 00:06:48,458
- You mean paparazzi.
152
00:06:48,545 --> 00:06:49,982
- Gesundheit!
153
00:06:50,069 --> 00:06:53,681
It's time for Creeping Up
on Famous People!
154
00:06:53,768 --> 00:06:55,291
- Mind if I borrow this?
155
00:06:55,378 --> 00:06:57,642
- [babbles]
156
00:06:57,729 --> 00:06:59,644
- [mumbles excitedly]
Huh?
157
00:06:59,731 --> 00:07:01,210
- This is a stick-up!
158
00:07:01,297 --> 00:07:04,953
Don't do nothin' stupid!
This diaper is stinky!
159
00:07:05,040 --> 00:07:07,173
- [gasps]
Don't aim that thing at me!
160
00:07:07,260 --> 00:07:09,697
- Boop! Patrick Star
with "Inaction News"!
161
00:07:09,784 --> 00:07:13,179
The public wants to know
the man behind the baby.
162
00:07:13,266 --> 00:07:17,139
- Whoa, no one's ever asked me
about me before.
163
00:07:17,226 --> 00:07:20,360
My name is Tony Tuna.
I'm a Capricorn.
164
00:07:20,447 --> 00:07:22,579
And I like taking candy
from babies.
165
00:07:22,667 --> 00:07:24,494
- Candy?
- Thank you.
166
00:07:24,581 --> 00:07:26,975
- How exciting!
167
00:07:27,062 --> 00:07:29,238
Can we talk
about your love life?
168
00:07:29,325 --> 00:07:31,327
Are you seeing anybody?
169
00:07:31,414 --> 00:07:33,939
- I see my parole officer
every week.
170
00:07:34,026 --> 00:07:36,028
- Can we just move
this robbery along?
171
00:07:36,115 --> 00:07:37,986
I got a business to run!
172
00:07:38,073 --> 00:07:39,684
- Uh, hold this a minute.
173
00:07:39,771 --> 00:07:42,077
[hums]
Thank you.
174
00:07:42,164 --> 00:07:43,992
There.
[chuckles]
175
00:07:44,079 --> 00:07:45,341
- Just a sec.
176
00:07:45,428 --> 00:07:47,300
One Krabby Patty to go, please.
177
00:07:47,387 --> 00:07:50,477
- This one's on me.
- Ooh!
178
00:07:50,564 --> 00:07:53,436
- Mmm!
- Thank you! Come again!
179
00:07:53,523 --> 00:07:55,525
- [chuckles]
180
00:07:55,612 --> 00:07:57,440
- [burps]
- Ooh.
181
00:07:57,527 --> 00:08:00,443
- [babbles]
182
00:08:00,530 --> 00:08:03,403
- Hey, you'd make
a great flunky.
183
00:08:03,490 --> 00:08:07,233
- Huh, you're telling me!
I've flunked everything.
184
00:08:10,192 --> 00:08:12,238
- [whistles]
185
00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:14,457
[both grunt]
186
00:08:14,544 --> 00:08:16,329
[both panting]
187
00:08:16,416 --> 00:08:18,810
- Don't forget
to start the meter!
188
00:08:18,897 --> 00:08:21,987
[sirens wailing]
189
00:08:22,074 --> 00:08:26,556
- Wow! A police escort?
You must be super famous!
190
00:08:26,643 --> 00:08:30,082
- Well, I have been getting
a lot of exposure lately.
191
00:08:30,169 --> 00:08:32,258
[quietly]
I gotta ditch these cops!
192
00:08:32,345 --> 00:08:35,914
- I get ya!
You want some privacy!
193
00:08:36,001 --> 00:08:38,003
- Whoa!
- I know just the place!
194
00:08:38,090 --> 00:08:40,135
[jaunty elevator music]
195
00:08:40,222 --> 00:08:42,181
[sirens wailing]
196
00:08:48,187 --> 00:08:50,842
- Welcome to my secret hideout.
197
00:08:50,929 --> 00:08:52,365
- We're coming to you live
198
00:08:52,452 --> 00:08:55,237
as we snoop
around a celebrity's crib!
199
00:08:55,324 --> 00:08:58,806
- Whoa!
200
00:08:58,893 --> 00:09:02,375
- [muffled laughter]
- Ooh! Tres shabby chic.
201
00:09:02,462 --> 00:09:04,943
[aggressive knocks on door]
202
00:09:05,030 --> 00:09:07,772
- Take cover!
It's gotta be the cops!
203
00:09:07,859 --> 00:09:12,515
- "Inaction News" update!
Star reporter answers a door!
204
00:09:12,602 --> 00:09:16,693
- Perch Perkins here with a
"Bikini Bottom News" exclusive.
205
00:09:16,781 --> 00:09:19,653
Your intrepid reporter has
tracked the infamous Tony Tuna
206
00:09:19,740 --> 00:09:21,655
to his clandestine hideout.
207
00:09:21,742 --> 00:09:23,222
- Hey!
- Huh?
208
00:09:23,309 --> 00:09:26,138
- This is
my celebrity interview!
209
00:09:26,225 --> 00:09:29,271
- This isn't some
frivolous celebrity puff piece!
210
00:09:29,358 --> 00:09:30,925
It's a hard-hitting
crime report!
211
00:09:31,012 --> 00:09:33,145
- Celebrity news!
- Crime report!
212
00:09:33,232 --> 00:09:34,624
- Celebrity news!
213
00:09:34,711 --> 00:09:36,017
- Crime report!
214
00:09:36,104 --> 00:09:39,281
- Ha-ha!
En guard, scoop stealer!
215
00:09:39,368 --> 00:09:42,197
- Have at thee,
gossip varlet!
216
00:09:42,284 --> 00:09:44,286
[both grunt]
217
00:09:44,373 --> 00:09:45,984
- I gotta get outta here
before...
218
00:09:46,071 --> 00:09:48,464
[sirens wailing]
219
00:09:48,551 --> 00:09:51,685
[all growl]
220
00:09:51,772 --> 00:09:54,383
Johnny Law shows up.
221
00:09:54,470 --> 00:09:57,386
- Okay, guys.
hold hands.
222
00:09:57,473 --> 00:09:59,127
[all growl]
223
00:09:59,214 --> 00:10:02,522
Come on out!
We have you surrounded!
224
00:10:02,609 --> 00:10:06,221
- Oh, no!
Not the dreaded daisy chain!
225
00:10:06,308 --> 00:10:11,009
Huh, if I only had some stupid
saps to take the fall for me.
226
00:10:11,096 --> 00:10:12,445
- [panting]
- Huh?
227
00:10:12,532 --> 00:10:15,883
Oh.
[evil laughter]
228
00:10:15,970 --> 00:10:18,320
Sappy to meet you!
229
00:10:18,407 --> 00:10:20,453
- Oh!
230
00:10:20,540 --> 00:10:23,021
- [grunts] Sappy birthday!
- Huh? Ah!
231
00:10:23,108 --> 00:10:25,284
- Have a nice sap.
232
00:10:25,371 --> 00:10:27,982
Mind the sap.
- [giggles]
233
00:10:28,069 --> 00:10:30,245
- Hey!
Don't push the press!
234
00:10:30,332 --> 00:10:31,638
- Huh?
235
00:10:31,725 --> 00:10:34,075
[all grunt, gasp]
236
00:10:34,162 --> 00:10:36,295
- You're all under arrest!
237
00:10:36,382 --> 00:10:39,211
- Hey, I'm no crook!
I'm a reporter!
238
00:10:39,298 --> 00:10:41,822
- This just in,
Perch Perkins arrested!
239
00:10:41,909 --> 00:10:43,432
Film at 11:00.
240
00:10:43,519 --> 00:10:46,958
- We've had complaints of
reporters harassing citizens!
241
00:10:47,045 --> 00:10:50,091
We're taking everyone in
for questioning!
242
00:10:50,178 --> 00:10:52,528
[all grunt]
- You're interviewing me?
243
00:10:52,615 --> 00:10:55,227
All right!
I'm gonna be on the news!
244
00:10:55,314 --> 00:10:58,143
- [grunts]
245
00:10:58,230 --> 00:11:00,014
- What's
your favorite donut flavor?
246
00:11:00,101 --> 00:11:02,016
Glazed or sprinkles?
247
00:11:02,103 --> 00:11:03,844
[both grunt]
248
00:11:03,931 --> 00:11:06,064
- And that wraps up
the crime report.
249
00:11:06,151 --> 00:11:07,413
[whinnying]
Huh? What's this?
250
00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:09,937
- [grunts]
251
00:11:10,024 --> 00:11:12,418
Ha! Whoo!
252
00:11:12,505 --> 00:11:14,159
- GrandPat coming
around the turn,
253
00:11:14,246 --> 00:11:16,204
gill and gill
with Coral Face Fanny!
254
00:11:16,291 --> 00:11:18,903
And GrandPat wins by a nose!
255
00:11:21,688 --> 00:11:25,474
- Welcome to "The Patrick Show"
mid-season finale!
256
00:11:25,561 --> 00:11:29,696
I'm Perch Perkins, coming to
you live from the pink carpet!
257
00:11:29,783 --> 00:11:32,351
Here come the stars now!
258
00:11:32,438 --> 00:11:33,743
[all grunt]
259
00:11:33,830 --> 00:11:36,398
Patrick and Squidina Star,
that is.
260
00:11:36,485 --> 00:11:38,444
[grunts]
261
00:11:38,531 --> 00:11:40,185
Guys, tonight,
all your fans
262
00:11:40,272 --> 00:11:42,448
are itching to know
just one thing:
263
00:11:42,535 --> 00:11:45,233
who are you wearing?
264
00:11:45,320 --> 00:11:47,627
- I'm wearing
SpongeBob's underpants.
265
00:11:47,714 --> 00:11:50,021
[chuckles
266
00:11:50,108 --> 00:11:53,807
- And I'm wearing SpongeBob!
267
00:11:53,894 --> 00:11:56,679
- I'm haute couture.
[giggles]
268
00:11:58,290 --> 00:11:59,160
[all gasp]
269
00:11:59,247 --> 00:12:02,163
[hum]
270
00:12:06,733 --> 00:12:07,603
- Oh!
- Huh?
271
00:12:07,690 --> 00:12:10,171
[all grunt]
272
00:12:10,258 --> 00:12:14,871
- And now, everyone's
favorite silly siblings,
273
00:12:14,959 --> 00:12:18,223
Patrick and Squidina!
274
00:12:18,310 --> 00:12:19,920
[both grunt]
275
00:12:20,007 --> 00:12:21,966
- What?
[both hum]
276
00:12:22,053 --> 00:12:24,925
[cheers and applause]
277
00:12:27,275 --> 00:12:29,538
- You know, Squidina,
278
00:12:29,625 --> 00:12:34,761
I can't believe it's been
a whole mid-season already!
279
00:12:34,848 --> 00:12:36,893
- I can't either,
big brother,
280
00:12:36,981 --> 00:12:39,679
but I'd like to give
a shout-out to our allowance
281
00:12:39,766 --> 00:12:41,855
for making this show possible.
282
00:12:41,942 --> 00:12:45,554
[cheers and applause]
283
00:12:45,641 --> 00:12:48,949
- And don't forget, sis,
coming up later,
284
00:12:49,036 --> 00:12:52,474
we have a big,
surprise celebrity guest!
285
00:12:52,561 --> 00:12:55,521
all: Ooh!
286
00:12:55,608 --> 00:12:56,696
both: Whoa!
287
00:12:56,783 --> 00:12:58,698
- This is so cool, Patrick.
288
00:12:58,785 --> 00:13:01,831
Why did we come all the way
up here to the moon?
289
00:13:01,918 --> 00:13:04,443
To explore and collect samples?
290
00:13:04,530 --> 00:13:07,446
- No, I had to fart.
291
00:13:07,533 --> 00:13:08,621
[grunts]
292
00:13:08,708 --> 00:13:10,753
[laughter]
- Huh?
293
00:13:10,840 --> 00:13:13,495
- That'll teach you
to tell stinky jokes!
294
00:13:13,582 --> 00:13:15,062
- What a shame.
295
00:13:15,149 --> 00:13:18,196
"The Patrick Show"
has really gone downhill
296
00:13:18,283 --> 00:13:20,676
since the first three episodes.
297
00:13:20,763 --> 00:13:22,461
all: Aww.
298
00:13:22,548 --> 00:13:25,246
- Looks like it's time
for a showstopper!
299
00:13:25,333 --> 00:13:27,379
- Okay.
You asked for it!
300
00:13:27,466 --> 00:13:31,687
Here's Bunny Star
and her trained tattoos!
301
00:13:31,774 --> 00:13:33,341
[both giggle]
302
00:13:33,428 --> 00:13:34,690
- [laughs haughtily]
303
00:13:34,777 --> 00:13:37,780
[hums]
[laughter]
304
00:13:37,867 --> 00:13:38,999
[upbeat music]
305
00:13:39,086 --> 00:13:41,262
- So, you come here often?
306
00:13:41,349 --> 00:13:42,742
- All the time.
307
00:13:42,829 --> 00:13:45,875
I'm stuck here
just like you, idiot.
308
00:13:45,962 --> 00:13:47,616
- Whoo! Whoo!
[both grunt]
309
00:13:47,703 --> 00:13:49,444
Coochie-coochie-coo!
310
00:13:49,531 --> 00:13:50,924
[gasps]
Oops!
311
00:13:51,011 --> 00:13:52,186
- Ew!
312
00:13:52,273 --> 00:13:54,188
all: Yay!
We are free!
313
00:13:54,275 --> 00:13:55,972
- I'm free! Yeah!
314
00:13:56,060 --> 00:13:57,800
[wheels skidding]
315
00:13:57,887 --> 00:14:00,542
- [laughs]
316
00:14:00,629 --> 00:14:02,718
Oops!
[cheers and applause]
317
00:14:02,805 --> 00:14:06,548
I'm okay!
318
00:14:06,635 --> 00:14:09,508
- And now,
Slappy's Poem Corner.
319
00:14:11,771 --> 00:14:15,340
- ? How do I smell thee?
Let me count the ways ?
320
00:14:15,427 --> 00:14:18,256
? Whether it's funky
or just kind of ripe ?
321
00:14:18,343 --> 00:14:21,607
? Everything stinks
and decays ?
322
00:14:21,694 --> 00:14:24,740
- Just like this show!
[laughter]
323
00:14:24,827 --> 00:14:26,916
- Mmm!
324
00:14:27,003 --> 00:14:31,704
[inhales deeply]
I like your smell.
325
00:14:31,791 --> 00:14:34,228
- Really?
- It's revolting.
326
00:14:34,315 --> 00:14:36,100
[both giggle]
327
00:14:36,187 --> 00:14:39,581
- Aw! Mmm.
328
00:14:39,668 --> 00:14:41,670
[both gag]
329
00:14:41,757 --> 00:14:44,499
- I told you this show stinks!
330
00:14:44,586 --> 00:14:46,849
[laughter]
331
00:14:46,936 --> 00:14:50,114
- Hey, Squidina!
- Yeah, Pearl?
332
00:14:50,201 --> 00:14:53,639
- Can you keep a secret?
- Ooh, I sure can!
333
00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:55,684
- Good!
So can I.
334
00:14:55,771 --> 00:14:58,905
- [growls]
[laughter]
335
00:14:58,992 --> 00:15:03,039
- Oh, Flying Dutchman?
- Yes, my dear?
336
00:15:03,127 --> 00:15:05,825
- Why were you reading
the obituaries this morning?
337
00:15:05,912 --> 00:15:08,610
- Just checking
to see who's single!
338
00:15:08,697 --> 00:15:10,917
[both scat, grunt]
339
00:15:11,004 --> 00:15:12,614
[both laugh]
340
00:15:12,701 --> 00:15:15,139
- Huh?
- Boo!
341
00:15:15,226 --> 00:15:17,880
Ya haunted hucksters!
- Boo!
342
00:15:17,967 --> 00:15:20,144
- Today's magic word is--
343
00:15:20,231 --> 00:15:21,536
[grunts]
- Don't say it!
344
00:15:21,623 --> 00:15:23,669
- Today's magic word is--
345
00:15:23,756 --> 00:15:25,061
[grunts]
- Don't say it!
346
00:15:25,149 --> 00:15:27,281
- Today's magic word is--
347
00:15:27,368 --> 00:15:29,675
[grunts]
- Don't say it!
348
00:15:29,762 --> 00:15:31,633
- Explosion!
349
00:15:31,720 --> 00:15:33,548
- [grunts]
350
00:15:33,635 --> 00:15:36,072
I told him not to say it.
351
00:15:36,160 --> 00:15:39,641
- ? Tinkle ?
- [panting]
352
00:15:39,728 --> 00:15:42,122
- ? That's Tinkle ?
353
00:15:42,209 --> 00:15:44,646
- [barks]
- What is it, boy?
354
00:15:44,733 --> 00:15:46,822
Did somebody fall
in the well?
355
00:15:46,909 --> 00:15:49,738
- [chomps]
- Ow!
356
00:15:49,825 --> 00:15:51,871
[snap]
My leg!
357
00:15:51,958 --> 00:15:54,265
- [barks]
- What is it, boy?
358
00:15:54,352 --> 00:15:56,092
Did someone fall
in the well?
359
00:15:56,180 --> 00:15:59,139
- [chomp]s
- Ouch! Ow!
360
00:15:59,226 --> 00:16:02,273
Oh, me carapace.
361
00:16:02,360 --> 00:16:05,580
- [barks]
362
00:16:05,667 --> 00:16:08,844
- What is it, boy?
Did someone fall in the well?
363
00:16:08,931 --> 00:16:09,932
- [growls]
364
00:16:10,019 --> 00:16:10,542
[TV static drones]
365
00:16:10,629 --> 00:16:12,761
- [hums]
366
00:16:12,848 --> 00:16:14,023
- You're on next, Pat!
367
00:16:14,110 --> 00:16:17,026
all: I'm ready to sing!
368
00:16:17,113 --> 00:16:20,291
- I'm sorry.
I meant Caveman Patrick.
369
00:16:20,378 --> 00:16:22,075
- How come he gets to go next?
370
00:16:22,162 --> 00:16:23,946
[all clamoring]
371
00:16:24,033 --> 00:16:26,906
- Forget it!
You're all fired!
372
00:16:26,993 --> 00:16:28,821
Bring in the dancing Patricks!
373
00:16:28,908 --> 00:16:30,475
[all grunt]
- Ow!
374
00:16:30,562 --> 00:16:32,085
- [laughs]
375
00:16:32,172 --> 00:16:34,914
- Ow!
- Saut�!
376
00:16:35,001 --> 00:16:38,657
- What did the electric general
say to his battery army?
377
00:16:38,744 --> 00:16:41,225
- Charge!
[laughter]
378
00:16:41,312 --> 00:16:43,705
- [grunts]
379
00:16:43,792 --> 00:16:49,145
- Remember to stay turned for
our special celebrity guest.
380
00:16:49,233 --> 00:16:50,756
[laughter]
[TV static drones]
381
00:16:50,843 --> 00:16:52,453
- Oh, wow, honey.
382
00:16:52,540 --> 00:16:56,588
I never thought
our son would go so far!
383
00:16:56,675 --> 00:16:59,939
- Yeah. Now let's see
how far our daughter goes.
384
00:17:00,026 --> 00:17:02,202
[both grunt]
385
00:17:02,289 --> 00:17:04,030
[crash]
- Uh...
386
00:17:04,117 --> 00:17:06,946
I'm so proud of them.
387
00:17:07,033 --> 00:17:12,212
all: Guess what me thinking!
388
00:17:12,299 --> 00:17:14,345
- We play game!
[ding]
389
00:17:14,432 --> 00:17:17,826
You! Guess what me thinking!
390
00:17:17,913 --> 00:17:20,351
[growls]
391
00:17:20,438 --> 00:17:21,961
- What that?
392
00:17:22,048 --> 00:17:24,355
Is food? No.
393
00:17:24,442 --> 00:17:26,226
Is mud? No.
394
00:17:26,313 --> 00:17:30,317
Is subatomic nuclei? No.
395
00:17:30,404 --> 00:17:34,800
If pressed to guess,
me say snakes!
396
00:17:34,887 --> 00:17:36,671
Snakes!
397
00:17:36,758 --> 00:17:38,369
- Is correct!
398
00:17:38,456 --> 00:17:40,022
- I win!
399
00:17:40,109 --> 00:17:42,155
- [munches shrilly]
400
00:17:42,242 --> 00:17:44,113
- [munches loudly]
401
00:17:44,200 --> 00:17:48,248
- Uh, you win?
402
00:17:48,335 --> 00:17:50,163
- I love you, Antoinette,
403
00:17:50,250 --> 00:17:54,385
like the fluttering sea-fly
loves the morning's first dung.
404
00:17:54,472 --> 00:17:58,519
- Oh, Louis, you know
I can't resist poetry.
405
00:17:58,606 --> 00:18:01,696
all: Aww.
406
00:18:01,783 --> 00:18:06,440
- Hey, Mr. Star, you still owe
me five bucks for newspapers.
407
00:18:06,527 --> 00:18:08,703
- The check is
in the mail, kid!
408
00:18:08,790 --> 00:18:11,315
- Give me my money,
you cheap-o!
409
00:18:15,101 --> 00:18:17,233
- Fresh!
410
00:18:17,321 --> 00:18:20,628
[laughter and applause]
411
00:18:20,715 --> 00:18:22,500
- [grunts]
412
00:18:22,587 --> 00:18:24,676
I can't wait anymore,
Squidina!
413
00:18:24,763 --> 00:18:27,026
When are we gonna reveal
our big celebrity guest?
414
00:18:27,113 --> 00:18:28,549
all: Ooh!
415
00:18:28,636 --> 00:18:31,160
- But that's
our finale's finale.
416
00:18:31,247 --> 00:18:32,858
We can't do that yet!
417
00:18:32,945 --> 00:18:35,251
all: Aww!
418
00:18:35,339 --> 00:18:37,602
- Message for Patrick Star.
419
00:18:37,689 --> 00:18:39,560
- Huh? Wow!
420
00:18:39,647 --> 00:18:42,781
It says here I finally
passed my clown exam!
421
00:18:42,868 --> 00:18:45,000
[laughter]
422
00:18:45,087 --> 00:18:47,481
I'm a clown now!
423
00:18:47,568 --> 00:18:50,354
- Congrats, big brother!
I love clowns!
424
00:18:50,441 --> 00:18:53,444
[grunts, growls]
[laughter]
425
00:18:53,531 --> 00:18:56,534
- Message for Squidina.
426
00:18:56,621 --> 00:18:58,666
- Huh?
What a coincidence!
427
00:18:58,753 --> 00:19:02,801
I just passed my evil
ventriloquist dummy exam!
428
00:19:02,888 --> 00:19:07,022
[grunts]
429
00:19:07,109 --> 00:19:09,024
all: Oh! Ooh!
430
00:19:09,111 --> 00:19:10,983
- Uh-oh.
431
00:19:11,070 --> 00:19:14,160
[screams]
- [evil laughter]
432
00:19:14,247 --> 00:19:15,944
- Boo!
433
00:19:16,031 --> 00:19:19,034
Clowns aren't funny!
I can't believe we're related!
434
00:19:19,121 --> 00:19:20,819
- Boo to you!
435
00:19:20,906 --> 00:19:24,213
I love evil ventriloquist
dummies, you dummy!
436
00:19:24,300 --> 00:19:26,781
- So it's mutiny, eh?
437
00:19:26,868 --> 00:19:30,568
Okay, then. I challenge you
to an air battle!
438
00:19:30,655 --> 00:19:33,092
- Well, flap away, Flabby!
439
00:19:33,179 --> 00:19:34,267
Huh!
- [growls]
440
00:19:34,354 --> 00:19:37,531
- [panting]
441
00:19:39,272 --> 00:19:41,405
[kettles whistle]
442
00:19:41,492 --> 00:19:44,495
[laughter and cheers]
443
00:19:44,582 --> 00:19:46,845
- How 'bout some coffee
with that tea?
444
00:19:46,932 --> 00:19:48,455
[cackles]
445
00:19:48,542 --> 00:19:50,979
- Huh?
[glug]
446
00:19:51,066 --> 00:19:55,027
That tea took
three hours to brew!
447
00:19:55,114 --> 00:19:56,724
[growls]
448
00:19:56,811 --> 00:20:00,119
- Huh?
- Eat scones, ya flabby pappy!
449
00:20:00,206 --> 00:20:02,251
- Uh-oh!
[grunts]
450
00:20:02,338 --> 00:20:04,906
[screams]
451
00:20:04,993 --> 00:20:06,908
[grunts]
452
00:20:06,995 --> 00:20:10,608
[moans]
453
00:20:10,695 --> 00:20:12,392
[cheers and applause]
- Thank you!
454
00:20:12,479 --> 00:20:14,568
Thank you so much!
455
00:20:14,655 --> 00:20:17,005
- Baby, you're the greatest!
456
00:20:17,092 --> 00:20:19,051
all: Aww.
457
00:20:19,138 --> 00:20:23,577
both: And now, the magic
of time-lapse photography!
458
00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:30,976
both: Whee!
- Whoo-hoo!
459
00:20:31,063 --> 00:20:34,240
- Ready for our big ending,
big brother?
460
00:20:34,327 --> 00:20:35,763
- I'm ready!
461
00:20:35,850 --> 00:20:39,027
But I forgot where I put it.
all: Aww.
462
00:20:39,114 --> 00:20:42,161
- Well, it's gotta be
around here somewhere.
463
00:20:42,248 --> 00:20:44,424
- Ending! Here, ending!
- Here, ending, ending!
464
00:20:44,511 --> 00:20:45,643
- Ending.
- Come on, ending.
465
00:20:45,730 --> 00:20:46,644
- Come on, ending,
ending, ending.
466
00:20:46,731 --> 00:20:49,255
- Come out.
Come out.
467
00:20:49,342 --> 00:20:51,649
- ? Where are you, ending?
Where are you, ending? ?
468
00:20:51,736 --> 00:20:53,564
? We're all looking for you ?
469
00:20:53,651 --> 00:20:55,261
? Where did you go? ?
470
00:20:55,348 --> 00:20:59,221
? Our finale's pending
without an ending ?
471
00:20:59,308 --> 00:21:02,660
? If we can't find it,
we can't end the show! ?
472
00:21:02,747 --> 00:21:05,097
? Yeah ?
[laughter]
473
00:21:05,184 --> 00:21:07,969
- Hey! Why don't we just fast
forward to the end of the show
474
00:21:08,056 --> 00:21:10,232
and get to the celebrity guest?
475
00:21:10,319 --> 00:21:12,539
- Great idea, Patrick!
476
00:21:12,626 --> 00:21:14,149
- [grunts]
- [growls]
477
00:21:14,236 --> 00:21:15,411
- [grunts]
478
00:21:15,499 --> 00:21:17,892
- [howls]
479
00:21:17,979 --> 00:21:19,938
all: Aww...
480
00:21:20,025 --> 00:21:22,854
- Well, where's
the big celebrity guest?
481
00:21:22,941 --> 00:21:24,769
- [panting]
I'm sorry I'm late!
482
00:21:24,856 --> 00:21:26,640
I was locked
in the bathroom!
483
00:21:26,727 --> 00:21:28,990
- Wait a barnacle,
484
00:21:29,077 --> 00:21:34,039
if you're the real Patrick,
then who are you?
485
00:21:34,126 --> 00:21:37,303
- It's me,
Bootsy Collins, baby.
486
00:21:37,390 --> 00:21:39,479
And I'm just filling in
for Patrick, yeah.
487
00:21:39,566 --> 00:21:40,741
- Why, thank you,
488
00:21:40,828 --> 00:21:43,527
internationally famous
celebrity person!
489
00:21:43,614 --> 00:21:46,007
- Today's magic word is--
490
00:21:46,094 --> 00:21:47,400
- Don't say it!
491
00:21:47,487 --> 00:21:49,097
all: Explosion!
492
00:21:49,184 --> 00:21:50,925
[boom]
493
00:21:51,012 --> 00:21:52,492
[laughter]
494
00:21:52,579 --> 00:21:54,015
- I told 'em not to say it.
495
00:21:57,192 --> 00:22:00,892
- [laughs]
496
00:22:00,979 --> 00:22:03,808
- Oh, I can see my house
from here!
497
00:22:06,462 --> 00:22:09,335
[upbeat music]
498
00:22:09,422 --> 00:22:16,603
? ?
499
00:22:16,653 --> 00:22:21,203
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