Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:05,010 --> 00:00:08,304
♪ Ba-ba-ba-ba, ba-ba-ba-ba ♪
2
00:00:08,305 --> 00:00:12,351
♪ Ba-ba, da-da-da-da-da-da
da-da-da ♪
3
00:00:15,020 --> 00:00:17,021
Oh, son, when you're young,
4
00:00:17,022 --> 00:00:20,275
it's easy to think that older
people have all the answers.
5
00:00:20,859 --> 00:00:21,943
But then you date one,
6
00:00:21,944 --> 00:00:24,550
and you realize we're
all just flying blind.
7
00:00:24,575 --> 00:00:26,421
Yeah,
I actually dated a senior
8
00:00:26,446 --> 00:00:29,033
for a few months last semester, so
I-I know what you mean, you know?
9
00:00:29,034 --> 00:00:31,537
Sweetie. I'm kind of in
the middle of a story here.
10
00:00:32,538 --> 00:00:36,123
Your generation just
loves to talk about themselves.
11
00:00:36,124 --> 00:00:38,000
Anyway, um,
12
00:00:38,001 --> 00:00:40,711
I had been dating
Robert for a few weeks,
13
00:00:40,712 --> 00:00:43,548
and it was putting a
real spring in my step.
14
00:00:45,050 --> 00:00:47,760
Guys! I just saw a pigeon
15
00:00:47,761 --> 00:00:49,929
on a romantic stroll...
16
00:00:49,930 --> 00:00:51,306
with a rat.
17
00:00:51,682 --> 00:00:54,725
Well, well, well, if it isn't
our long-lost lovestruck Sophie.
18
00:00:54,726 --> 00:00:58,229
You've been off in
Robert-land forever.
19
00:00:58,230 --> 00:01:00,273
The apartment's a wreck,
and Cowgirl Cleanup
20
00:01:00,274 --> 00:01:01,691
is a two-woman job.
21
00:01:02,943 --> 00:01:05,278
Whoa, Nelly!
22
00:01:05,279 --> 00:01:07,572
This bronco's got buck!
23
00:01:07,573 --> 00:01:11,367
We promised each other that we
wouldn't talk about Cowgirl Cleanup
24
00:01:11,368 --> 00:01:12,953
until the trademark clears.
25
00:01:15,372 --> 00:01:17,290
Okay. Yeah. I know
I've been gone a lot,
26
00:01:17,291 --> 00:01:20,627
but it's just that Robert keeps
planning all of these amazing dates.
27
00:01:20,961 --> 00:01:23,462
I have not set an
alarm in years.
28
00:01:23,463 --> 00:01:26,466
My body just naturally
wakes up at 6 AM.
29
00:01:27,301 --> 00:01:29,303
You're amazing.
30
00:01:30,220 --> 00:01:32,597
This is my tomato
bisque.
31
00:01:35,601 --> 00:01:37,019
Holy shit!
32
00:01:39,354 --> 00:01:40,479
Whoa!
33
00:01:40,480 --> 00:01:42,523
And then, we go back
to his apartment,
34
00:01:42,524 --> 00:01:45,318
which overlooks Central Park, and
we do it until the sun comes up.
35
00:01:45,319 --> 00:01:47,153
I got a question. When
you're "doing it,"
36
00:01:47,154 --> 00:01:50,239
do you ever accidentally
activate his Life Alert necklace?
37
00:01:51,450 --> 00:01:54,577
- Ha. 'Cause he's older.
- Yes.
38
00:01:54,578 --> 00:01:57,121
Does he sleep in one of those
floor-length grandpa nightgowns?
39
00:01:57,122 --> 00:01:59,081
Yeah, with one of
those long pointy hats?
40
00:01:59,082 --> 00:02:00,166
And he's all like,
41
00:02:00,167 --> 00:02:03,252
"honk-shoo, honk-shoo,
mimimimimi!"
42
00:02:03,253 --> 00:02:05,588
Ignore them, Soph.
I think it's great.
43
00:02:05,589 --> 00:02:08,466
It actually got me to widen the
age range on my dating apps,
44
00:02:08,467 --> 00:02:09,968
and I met someone.
45
00:02:10,802 --> 00:02:13,721
Wait, you're dating a new guy?
Well, how do I not know this?
46
00:02:13,722 --> 00:02:15,765
Well ... I'm
late to meet him.
47
00:02:15,766 --> 00:02:18,185
I'll fill you in later. We
can do Cowgirl Confessions.
48
00:02:18,852 --> 00:02:20,372
Save
it for the Sharks!
49
00:02:22,773 --> 00:02:25,066
Guys, Robert is going to
be here any minute, okay?
50
00:02:25,067 --> 00:02:27,151
So, no more old man jokes.
51
00:02:27,152 --> 00:02:29,862
Of course not. We want him to
feel totally comfortable here.
52
00:02:29,863 --> 00:02:31,739
That's why Sid put
prune juice on tap.
53
00:02:34,493 --> 00:02:35,535
What are we laughing at?
54
00:02:35,536 --> 00:02:38,746
We're just razzing our friend
'cause she's dating an old guy.
55
00:02:38,747 --> 00:02:40,081
Yeah.
56
00:02:40,082 --> 00:02:42,292
- I believe that's me.
- Oh, what?
57
00:02:43,877 --> 00:02:46,547
But, you're... beautiful.
58
00:02:48,257 --> 00:02:50,299
Uh, Robert, meet my friends.
59
00:02:50,300 --> 00:02:52,176
Friends, this is Robert.
60
00:02:52,177 --> 00:02:54,638
Zamn, Zaddy! Your
skin is golden.
61
00:02:55,389 --> 00:02:58,808
It's like the flesh of a sun-dappled
peach on a late summer's evening.
62
00:02:58,809 --> 00:03:00,310
- May I?
- Sure.
63
00:03:01,436 --> 00:03:04,438
Oh, my God. How do you get it
to stay so supple? It's so...
64
00:03:04,439 --> 00:03:06,774
- Okay, we don't need another
lawsuit. - Yeah.
65
00:03:06,775 --> 00:03:08,526
Introductions are over.
66
00:03:08,527 --> 00:03:10,528
Ah, your friends are nice.
Little handsy, but nice.
67
00:03:10,529 --> 00:03:13,030
Uh, yeah, th-that's
them in a nutshell.
68
00:03:13,031 --> 00:03:14,657
Hey, you know what?
69
00:03:14,658 --> 00:03:16,159
I was thinking...
70
00:03:16,910 --> 00:03:19,287
tonight, I would take you out.
71
00:03:19,288 --> 00:03:20,538
And by "out,"
72
00:03:20,539 --> 00:03:22,999
I mean, in to my apartment,
73
00:03:23,000 --> 00:03:25,002
where it's cozy. And cheap.
74
00:03:25,961 --> 00:03:28,838
A night in at your
place sounds great.
75
00:03:28,839 --> 00:03:30,215
Yeah.
76
00:03:31,300 --> 00:03:32,801
You okay?
77
00:03:33,177 --> 00:03:35,636
I just kind of thought he'd
be, like, some old novelty
78
00:03:35,637 --> 00:03:38,514
she'd be into for a while, and
then get tired of, you know?
79
00:03:38,515 --> 00:03:41,018
Like those two weeks she
tried being a top hat person.
80
00:03:41,727 --> 00:03:43,227
You're sure it's
not giving Lincoln?
81
00:03:43,228 --> 00:03:45,856
Only in that it's
blowing my brains out.
82
00:03:46,565 --> 00:03:47,940
I'm sorry.
83
00:03:47,941 --> 00:03:50,484
Maybe his organs are in worse
shape than his outer body,
84
00:03:50,485 --> 00:03:51,987
and he won't live much longer.
85
00:03:53,363 --> 00:03:54,864
Probably not, though.
86
00:03:54,865 --> 00:03:56,867
He glows from within.
87
00:03:57,910 --> 00:03:59,577
Hey!
88
00:03:59,578 --> 00:04:01,245
Class of '88. Me, too.
89
00:04:01,246 --> 00:04:02,372
Huh?!
90
00:04:03,290 --> 00:04:05,499
I'm sorry. What, you
two are the same age?
91
00:04:05,500 --> 00:04:07,085
Looks like it.
92
00:04:08,170 --> 00:04:09,213
Does not!
93
00:04:11,298 --> 00:04:13,341
Sid, promise me that in 25
years, we're gonna look like him,
94
00:04:13,342 --> 00:04:15,176
and not like him.
95
00:04:15,177 --> 00:04:17,346
- Sorry, no offense.
- Huh?!
96
00:04:18,013 --> 00:04:21,141
Dude, of course, we're gonna
age like Robert. Look at us.
97
00:04:21,808 --> 00:04:23,017
No, you're right.
98
00:04:23,018 --> 00:04:24,936
And that one gray hair,
nothing to worry about.
99
00:04:24,937 --> 00:04:26,647
Exactly, dude. I
barely even see it.
100
00:04:27,564 --> 00:04:29,106
- What, me?
- Yeah.
101
00:04:29,107 --> 00:04:30,983
No, I meant your gray hair.
I don't have any gray hair.
102
00:04:30,984 --> 00:04:32,110
Neither do I.
103
00:04:32,569 --> 00:04:34,488
No, no!
104
00:04:37,908 --> 00:04:39,159
What's up, sad boy?
105
00:04:41,203 --> 00:04:42,662
Figured you could use a hang.
106
00:04:42,663 --> 00:04:45,164
Plus, Rachel's still in Florida
taking care of her aunt.
107
00:04:45,165 --> 00:04:47,124
I'm lonely, I'm bored,
108
00:04:47,125 --> 00:04:49,502
- and I miss my bae's touch!
- Okay.
109
00:04:49,503 --> 00:04:52,713
Not loving your touch right
now, but, uh, okay, fine.
110
00:04:52,714 --> 00:04:54,924
Yeah, I guess I could
use the company.
111
00:04:54,925 --> 00:04:56,300
I'll go order us a pizza.
112
00:04:56,301 --> 00:04:58,135
Can Robert do that?
113
00:04:58,136 --> 00:05:00,336
Probably just make it, since
he's a super-talented chef.
114
00:05:02,307 --> 00:05:05,269
I mean, I hate that old dirtbag!
115
00:05:07,062 --> 00:05:08,480
Ooh.
116
00:05:08,897 --> 00:05:09,982
Oh!
117
00:05:10,732 --> 00:05:12,900
Hey, babe. How's Boca? RACHEL
Don't know.
118
00:05:12,901 --> 00:05:15,528
I flew home early. My aunt's
Florida friends were all,
119
00:05:15,529 --> 00:05:16,904
"Don't say gay." And I was like,
120
00:05:16,905 --> 00:05:19,616
"You know what? I'm
gonna say it. Gay! Bye!"
121
00:05:20,200 --> 00:05:22,451
Come over. I
haven't seen you in weeks,
122
00:05:22,452 --> 00:05:25,746
and there's some things we
couldn't do on FaceTime.
123
00:05:25,747 --> 00:05:28,457
I'm dying to do those things,
but I promised Jesse we'd hang.
124
00:05:28,458 --> 00:05:29,709
Maybe I can bail?
125
00:05:29,710 --> 00:05:31,586
Yeah, hi. Yeah, I'll get
a sausage pie, please.
126
00:05:31,587 --> 00:05:34,547
Oh, a-and make it a large 'cause
I'm hangin' with my sister.
127
00:05:36,425 --> 00:05:37,467
I can't bail.
128
00:05:37,843 --> 00:05:40,095
You're so lucky your
brother's in prison.
129
00:05:40,637 --> 00:05:43,347
Oh, man. We are aging so
much faster than I thought!
130
00:05:43,348 --> 00:05:44,348
Oh, you're right.
131
00:05:44,349 --> 00:05:46,351
We look like Grace and
Frankie's grandfathers.
132
00:05:47,352 --> 00:05:49,395
The lighting in
here is not helping!
133
00:05:49,396 --> 00:05:50,916
Siddhartha, do not
blame the lighting!
134
00:05:51,648 --> 00:05:53,357
Two paths diverging
into the woods.
135
00:05:53,358 --> 00:05:55,359
One leads to gorgeous Robert,
136
00:05:55,360 --> 00:05:57,653
and the other leads to that
cranky old man at the bar
137
00:05:57,654 --> 00:05:59,865
whose head looks like a scrotum.
138
00:06:00,532 --> 00:06:01,782
Dude, you're right.
139
00:06:01,783 --> 00:06:03,868
We gotta start taking better
care of ourselves right now.
140
00:06:03,869 --> 00:06:06,078
That's how you get
to be a Robert.
141
00:06:06,079 --> 00:06:09,540
Just need to be calm about this.
Don't need to do anything drastic.
142
00:06:09,541 --> 00:06:12,711
Oh, absolutely.
Calm. Non-drastic.
143
00:06:13,337 --> 00:06:15,297
We will do anything
to look young forever!
144
00:06:30,395 --> 00:06:33,649
Wowza. I am romantic as butt.
145
00:06:34,608 --> 00:06:37,527
Hey, Val!
146
00:06:37,528 --> 00:06:38,694
Hey!
147
00:06:38,695 --> 00:06:41,198
Wait, did you sign up for Big
Brother, Big Sister without me?
148
00:06:42,491 --> 00:06:45,494
What? This is the guy I
told you about. Swish.
149
00:06:46,161 --> 00:06:46,995
Swish?
150
00:06:46,996 --> 00:06:48,746
Sup?
151
00:06:48,747 --> 00:06:51,624
We got kicked out of his dorm
for hustling a game of flip cup,
152
00:06:51,625 --> 00:06:55,586
and Swish lost his fake
ID, so he can't go to bars.
153
00:06:55,587 --> 00:06:57,713
Your guys' place is sick!
154
00:06:57,714 --> 00:07:00,092
- My girl is hella aspirational.
- Aw...
155
00:07:01,093 --> 00:07:04,595
Um, Val? Can I talk to you
in the kitchen for a minute?
156
00:07:04,596 --> 00:07:06,598
- Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
- Mm-hmm.
157
00:07:09,268 --> 00:07:10,268
How old is he?
158
00:07:10,269 --> 00:07:13,646
NYU, Class of '26, bay-bee!
159
00:07:13,647 --> 00:07:15,649
Two-six!
160
00:07:17,192 --> 00:07:20,486
Okay, I am super happy for you,
but you guys can't stay here
161
00:07:20,487 --> 00:07:23,567
'cause Robert's gonna be here any minute,
and I have this whole night planned.
162
00:07:23,699 --> 00:07:25,616
Soph, you've barely
been home for weeks,
163
00:07:25,617 --> 00:07:27,410
and now, you're
trying to kick me out?
164
00:07:27,411 --> 00:07:28,786
Please!
165
00:07:28,787 --> 00:07:30,997
- I'm trying to have a date.
- Me, too.
166
00:07:30,998 --> 00:07:33,417
Y'all have your own
bedrooms?! Damn!
167
00:07:34,418 --> 00:07:36,920
Okay, but yours is ridiculous.
168
00:07:38,046 --> 00:07:41,300
You and Robert are no less
ridiculous than me and Swish.
169
00:07:41,800 --> 00:07:43,634
And we're not going anywhere,
so I guess the four of us
170
00:07:43,635 --> 00:07:45,678
will just have to share
the apartment tonight.
171
00:07:48,432 --> 00:07:50,017
- Fine.
- Fine.
172
00:07:54,354 --> 00:07:55,856
Sup, sir? I'm Swish.
173
00:07:56,565 --> 00:07:58,108
Whoa, pink wine?
174
00:08:03,655 --> 00:08:05,531
This is our cryotherapy chamber.
175
00:08:05,532 --> 00:08:08,201
The subzero nitrogen
helps detoxify the body
176
00:08:08,202 --> 00:08:10,286
while also reducing
oxidative stress.
177
00:08:10,287 --> 00:08:12,997
You know, I am so glad scientists
gave up on climate change
178
00:08:12,998 --> 00:08:15,292
and started focusing
on making us look hot.
179
00:08:19,796 --> 00:08:22,590
Some people find it
helpful to sing a song
180
00:08:22,591 --> 00:08:24,509
to keep your mind off the pain.
181
00:08:24,510 --> 00:08:26,761
Sorry, the what
now?
182
00:08:26,762 --> 00:08:29,847
- Ah! Ah! Oh, my God! Cold! Cold!
- Ah! Ow! Ow!
183
00:08:29,848 --> 00:08:30,848
Try singing!
184
00:08:31,391 --> 00:08:33,100
Uh, la la la!
185
00:08:33,101 --> 00:08:34,727
La la la!
186
00:08:34,728 --> 00:08:37,188
- Are you singing or crying?
- Both!
187
00:08:48,200 --> 00:08:49,951
Would
you like more salad?
188
00:08:49,952 --> 00:08:52,538
No, I
never went to college.
189
00:08:53,622 --> 00:08:55,582
No, salad!
190
00:08:56,250 --> 00:08:57,751
Yeah.
191
00:08:59,711 --> 00:09:02,171
- Uh, so I was thinking...
- What?
192
00:09:02,172 --> 00:09:04,007
I was... Oh, my God.
193
00:09:05,133 --> 00:09:06,425
Val!
194
00:09:06,426 --> 00:09:07,553
Val!
195
00:09:12,140 --> 00:09:15,935
Hey. Why don't you join
us? We have plenty of food.
196
00:09:15,936 --> 00:09:18,521
You must have worked up an
appetite with all that jumping.
197
00:09:18,522 --> 00:09:21,148
Fire! I'd love to
throw a fork in that.
198
00:09:21,149 --> 00:09:24,443
Ah, yes. That is a
fire idea, Robert.
199
00:09:24,444 --> 00:09:27,071
See? My guy's mature
and deals with problems.
200
00:09:27,072 --> 00:09:28,115
Yeah. Back problems.
201
00:09:29,908 --> 00:09:32,035
Where's the mirror?
202
00:09:32,536 --> 00:09:34,037
I want to see how good we look.
203
00:09:34,705 --> 00:09:39,000
Oh, you won't see results
after just one treatment.
204
00:09:39,001 --> 00:09:41,168
Most of our clients like
to come in twice a week.
205
00:09:41,169 --> 00:09:43,881
Uh, we're looking for something
we'd only have to do, like,
206
00:09:44,590 --> 00:09:45,632
twice a year.
207
00:09:46,341 --> 00:09:47,384
Of course.
208
00:09:49,052 --> 00:09:50,928
Well, whatever she has in
mind, it can't possibly hurt
209
00:09:50,929 --> 00:09:52,680
as much as that just did.
210
00:09:52,681 --> 00:09:54,683
How do we feel about needles?
211
00:09:56,602 --> 00:09:58,520
Depends on where you're
gonna stick it, Kirstin.
212
00:10:01,273 --> 00:10:02,524
Sorry that took so long.
213
00:10:04,234 --> 00:10:05,276
Ellen?
214
00:10:10,824 --> 00:10:12,617
Oh, my God!
215
00:10:12,618 --> 00:10:14,243
Oh, my God! Get
out, get out, get out!
216
00:10:18,165 --> 00:10:20,041
I'm so, so sorry!
217
00:10:20,042 --> 00:10:22,168
Rachel came home early, and
I didn't wanna ditch you,
218
00:10:22,169 --> 00:10:24,503
so I asked her over here. And
then you were gone so long.
219
00:10:24,504 --> 00:10:25,588
And then one thing
led to another.
220
00:10:25,589 --> 00:10:27,465
And then I just need you to
know that it was not my boob!
221
00:10:27,466 --> 00:10:29,717
- What?!
- I think you saw a boob back there,
222
00:10:29,718 --> 00:10:33,095
a-and it's important to me that you know
that was your sister's girlfriend's boob
223
00:10:33,096 --> 00:10:34,890
and not your sister's boob!
224
00:10:35,599 --> 00:10:37,016
Why would you use my bed?
225
00:10:37,017 --> 00:10:40,019
At least somebody's using it.
226
00:10:40,020 --> 00:10:41,860
What is that supposed to
mean?! - Nothing!
227
00:10:42,314 --> 00:10:45,191
I-I might have told her that you haven't
slept with anyone since Meredith.
228
00:10:45,192 --> 00:10:46,651
What? For all you know,
229
00:10:46,652 --> 00:10:48,444
I could've slept with dozens
of women since Meredith!
230
00:10:48,445 --> 00:10:50,279
No, Sid hasn't texted me.
231
00:10:50,280 --> 00:10:51,822
You and Sid text
about my sex life.
232
00:10:51,823 --> 00:10:53,366
Not lately.
233
00:10:53,367 --> 00:10:54,909
How did this happen?!
234
00:10:54,910 --> 00:10:56,536
How did I become the guy
who has so little sex
235
00:10:56,537 --> 00:10:57,828
that people text about it?!
236
00:10:57,829 --> 00:10:59,080
I mean, I'm cool!
237
00:10:59,081 --> 00:11:01,791
I play the guitar! I
collect vintage T-shirts!
238
00:11:01,792 --> 00:11:05,754
Yes, 'cause you have a lot of
extra time from not having sex.
239
00:11:06,463 --> 00:11:09,633
Really glad we're finally getting
to spend some time together, Rachel.
240
00:11:10,801 --> 00:11:12,844
Jesse, yes, you're cool.
241
00:11:12,845 --> 00:11:15,721
But, you're also a softie
who's hung up on a hottie
242
00:11:15,722 --> 00:11:17,890
who's into an oldie. And
I hate to say it, bro,
243
00:11:17,891 --> 00:11:19,141
but you need to move on.
244
00:11:19,142 --> 00:11:20,852
Or, at the very least,
take back the bed.
245
00:11:20,853 --> 00:11:23,229
You're right. I need
to take back the bed.
246
00:11:23,230 --> 00:11:25,630
I'm gonna go out right now and
find a woman to have sex with.
247
00:11:26,608 --> 00:11:29,068
In a very respectful way
where she also mutually
248
00:11:29,069 --> 00:11:30,611
wants to have sex with me.
249
00:11:30,612 --> 00:11:32,154
- Totally! Get back out there.
- Oh, yes!
250
00:11:32,155 --> 00:11:33,239
Leave now! We'll
watch the place.
251
00:11:33,240 --> 00:11:35,199
No, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no.
252
00:11:35,200 --> 00:11:36,450
You're coming with me, okay?
253
00:11:36,451 --> 00:11:39,161
Nothing is creepier than a
single straight white guy
254
00:11:39,162 --> 00:11:41,539
sitting alone at a bar,
trying to pick up women.
255
00:11:41,540 --> 00:11:43,332
Fine. Great.
256
00:11:43,333 --> 00:11:45,543
I can't get laid until
my brother gets laid.
257
00:11:45,544 --> 00:11:48,254
Love it. Very Mormon.
258
00:11:50,465 --> 00:11:51,549
So, Swish?
259
00:11:51,550 --> 00:11:53,552
What'd you learn
at school today?
260
00:11:53,927 --> 00:11:56,137
Um, we've been studying
really old films.
261
00:11:56,138 --> 00:11:58,055
Uh, specifically
from the late '90s.
262
00:11:58,056 --> 00:11:59,932
My thesis is on the
Scream franchise.
263
00:11:59,933 --> 00:12:01,976
Ooh! I catered the
New York premiere.
264
00:12:01,977 --> 00:12:04,605
David Arquette loved my hummus.
265
00:12:05,397 --> 00:12:07,148
Mad respect, sir.
266
00:12:07,149 --> 00:12:08,941
Is it true landlines were
invented for that movie?
267
00:12:08,942 --> 00:12:10,151
Oh, Robert.
268
00:12:10,152 --> 00:12:12,528
You do not have to
help Swish with his homework.
269
00:12:12,529 --> 00:12:13,863
Oh, I don't know.
270
00:12:13,864 --> 00:12:17,326
I think it might be nice for
Swish to learn from his elders.
271
00:12:18,744 --> 00:12:20,454
Isn't that what
he's doing with you?
272
00:12:20,996 --> 00:12:23,456
Besides, Robert and
I have important...
273
00:12:23,457 --> 00:12:24,874
grown-up things to talk about.
274
00:12:24,875 --> 00:12:28,127
You know what? Nothing makes
you sound more like a dumb baby
275
00:12:28,128 --> 00:12:30,087
than when you call
something "grown-up."
276
00:12:30,088 --> 00:12:33,168
Oh, you should know a thing or two about
dumb babies 'cause you're dating one.
277
00:12:35,052 --> 00:12:36,372
We should just
stay quiet, right?
278
00:12:36,845 --> 00:12:38,554
You're very smart for your age.
279
00:12:43,268 --> 00:12:46,521
This is our top-of-the-line
age simulator.
280
00:12:46,522 --> 00:12:50,150
I can show you exactly how you'll
look in 25 years if you do nothing.
281
00:12:52,861 --> 00:12:56,781
Oh, my face.
Oh, my beautiful face!
282
00:12:56,782 --> 00:12:58,199
Well, good luck to you, buddy.
283
00:12:58,200 --> 00:13:00,369
I guess some of us are just
blessed with good genes.
284
00:13:00,911 --> 00:13:01,911
You know what they say.
285
00:13:01,912 --> 00:13:04,455
"South Asian don't raisin."
286
00:13:04,456 --> 00:13:07,709
Oops. I-I forgot to hit
play on your simulation.
287
00:13:10,587 --> 00:13:13,590
I'm a raisin! I'm a raisin!
288
00:13:14,550 --> 00:13:16,385
Shoot us up with
everything you've got.
289
00:13:20,889 --> 00:13:23,641
Jesse, I promise you
don't say "hello" weird.
290
00:13:23,642 --> 00:13:25,560
Just go talk to that cute girl.
291
00:13:25,561 --> 00:13:27,270
Are you sure? It feels
like it's coming out weird.
292
00:13:27,271 --> 00:13:29,146
Hello. Hallo. Hallo?
293
00:13:29,147 --> 00:13:31,149
- Just go with hi!
- Hi!
294
00:13:32,317 --> 00:13:34,820
- Hi! Hi!
- Hi! Hi.
295
00:13:36,864 --> 00:13:39,574
Wait, wait. C-can you do the
sound of the dial-up modem again?
296
00:13:39,575 --> 00:13:41,284
The modem goes like this.
297
00:13:44,746 --> 00:13:46,456
♪ beatboxing along ♪
298
00:13:48,208 --> 00:13:52,086
♪ harmonizing ♪
299
00:13:52,087 --> 00:13:54,005
Anyone need more
wine? I need wine.
300
00:13:54,006 --> 00:13:55,965
Hey, actually, I'm going to, uh,
301
00:13:55,966 --> 00:13:57,717
use the facility and get going.
302
00:13:57,718 --> 00:13:59,678
No. No no, don't get going.
303
00:14:00,095 --> 00:14:02,472
Valentina, can I talk to you
in the kitchen for a minute?
304
00:14:03,348 --> 00:14:05,433
You guys are
driving Robert out of here,
305
00:14:05,434 --> 00:14:07,435
and I know you're not
really that into Swish.
306
00:14:07,436 --> 00:14:09,645
You're wrong. I like Swish.
307
00:14:09,646 --> 00:14:11,522
I really like Swish.
308
00:14:11,523 --> 00:14:13,442
In fact, I think I love Swish.
309
00:14:16,028 --> 00:14:18,988
If you swear to me that
you're serious about Swish,
310
00:14:18,989 --> 00:14:21,617
then I'll drop it
and be happy for you.
311
00:14:24,870 --> 00:14:27,079
Fine. I'm not
serious about Swish.
312
00:14:27,080 --> 00:14:29,624
I was just mad that you
made fun of my relationship,
313
00:14:29,625 --> 00:14:31,792
and then tried to kick
me out of our apartment.
314
00:14:31,793 --> 00:14:32,793
Okay.
315
00:14:32,794 --> 00:14:34,795
And that was lame
of me, alright?
316
00:14:34,796 --> 00:14:37,298
But, I-I was just nervous
about hosting Robert.
317
00:14:37,299 --> 00:14:39,425
We never have grown-ups here
that aren't our parents.
318
00:14:39,426 --> 00:14:41,427
Soph, you have to
stop saying grown-ups.
319
00:14:41,428 --> 00:14:42,679
I know!
320
00:14:44,431 --> 00:14:46,682
Why are you hanging out with Swish
when you don't really like him?
321
00:14:46,683 --> 00:14:48,518
Oh, I like him fine.
322
00:14:48,519 --> 00:14:51,521
I mean, obviously, I'll
get bored and end it soon,
323
00:14:51,522 --> 00:14:52,980
but he's a lot of fun.
324
00:14:52,981 --> 00:14:55,233
And a hell of an ego boost.
325
00:14:55,234 --> 00:14:58,069
I do any basic adult
things, Swish is like,
326
00:14:58,070 --> 00:15:01,323
"Holy shit!" or, "Whoa!"
or, "You're amazing!"
327
00:15:02,950 --> 00:15:03,950
Oh no.
328
00:15:04,993 --> 00:15:05,993
Holy shit!
329
00:15:05,994 --> 00:15:07,036
Whoa!
330
00:15:07,037 --> 00:15:08,705
You're amazing.
331
00:15:09,790 --> 00:15:11,249
I'm Robert's Swish.
332
00:15:13,460 --> 00:15:16,212
What are you in the
mood for? Wine? Beer?
333
00:15:16,213 --> 00:15:17,213
I can make you a Manhattan
334
00:15:17,214 --> 00:15:20,133
if you promise not to judge
me for googling it.
335
00:15:24,012 --> 00:15:25,012
Please don't look at us!
336
00:15:25,013 --> 00:15:27,890
Just try to remember
me as I was!
337
00:15:27,891 --> 00:15:29,767
What the hell
happened to you two?
338
00:15:29,768 --> 00:15:32,103
We got some
preventative work done.
339
00:15:32,104 --> 00:15:34,063
But I had an allergic
reaction to the Botox.
340
00:15:34,064 --> 00:15:36,817
My body is literally
rejecting youth.
341
00:15:38,151 --> 00:15:40,654
I'm just a little bit
raw from the lasers.
342
00:15:41,613 --> 00:15:43,656
And the needling.
343
00:15:43,657 --> 00:15:45,616
And the chemical peel.
344
00:15:45,617 --> 00:15:49,162
Honestly, it is disgusting the
hoops we make men jump through.
345
00:15:50,205 --> 00:15:52,374
Anne, I'd like you to
meet Charlie and Sid.
346
00:15:58,922 --> 00:16:00,423
I really like your room.
347
00:16:00,424 --> 00:16:02,216
Thanks. I, uh,
348
00:16:02,217 --> 00:16:03,676
painted it myself.
349
00:16:03,677 --> 00:16:05,095
Ooh...
350
00:16:12,060 --> 00:16:14,353
Whose bra is this?
351
00:16:14,354 --> 00:16:15,563
D-do you have a girlfriend?
352
00:16:15,564 --> 00:16:17,648
No, no, no. H-honestly, it's
probably just my sister's.
353
00:16:17,649 --> 00:16:19,049
She was having sex
in here earlier.
354
00:16:19,776 --> 00:16:22,278
Not with me. We don't
do that. She's adopted.
355
00:16:22,279 --> 00:16:24,155
Don't know why I
said that. Uh...
356
00:16:26,366 --> 00:16:28,201
I'll call you a Lyft.
357
00:16:28,202 --> 00:16:29,203
Yeah.
358
00:16:31,581 --> 00:16:34,290
Soph! Relax. You are
not Robert's Swish.
359
00:16:34,291 --> 00:16:35,708
- He really likes you.
- Yeah,
360
00:16:35,709 --> 00:16:37,627
he likes me for the moment
361
00:16:37,628 --> 00:16:40,713
because I'm young and
fun and easily impressed.
362
00:16:40,714 --> 00:16:43,217
Okay, but what happens
when the novelty wears off?
363
00:16:44,009 --> 00:16:46,970
It's gonna be like that time when
I decided to be a top hat person.
364
00:16:47,679 --> 00:16:48,889
Nope!
365
00:16:50,015 --> 00:16:52,892
Okay, if you're feeling worried
about it, then test it out.
366
00:16:52,893 --> 00:16:55,394
Try to make plans with Robert
for, like, a month from now.
367
00:16:55,395 --> 00:16:58,106
If he commits, you're
golden. If he doesn't...
368
00:16:59,066 --> 00:17:00,317
you're his Swish.
369
00:17:01,360 --> 00:17:02,568
Genius.
370
00:17:02,569 --> 00:17:03,694
Mm-hmm.
371
00:17:03,695 --> 00:17:07,114
Swish and I will
give you guys some space...
372
00:17:07,115 --> 00:17:09,200
I don't know where he went.
373
00:17:09,201 --> 00:17:11,160
Maybe he has a curfew?
374
00:17:11,161 --> 00:17:12,828
Hey. That was fun.
375
00:17:12,829 --> 00:17:14,163
Thank you for dinner.
376
00:17:14,164 --> 00:17:16,457
Oh, come on! No,
it-it's still early.
377
00:17:16,458 --> 00:17:19,627
- No, I-I really gotta get home.
- Okay, but before you do, uh,
378
00:17:19,628 --> 00:17:23,381
the Fleet Foxes are playing
Webster Hall in a few weeks.
379
00:17:23,382 --> 00:17:24,382
We should go.
380
00:17:24,383 --> 00:17:26,008
Uh, call you tomorrow.
We'll talk all about it.
381
00:17:26,009 --> 00:17:27,176
Okay, but I have it right here.
382
00:17:27,177 --> 00:17:28,636
Hey, don't go rushing
into buying anything.
383
00:17:28,637 --> 00:17:30,264
No, no, no! Who's rushing?
384
00:17:32,015 --> 00:17:33,099
Just take a peep.
385
00:17:33,100 --> 00:17:36,227
Just send me the information, and,
you know, we'll figure it out.
386
00:17:36,228 --> 00:17:39,814
Oh! Maybe concerts aren't
your thing, but here is a list
387
00:17:39,815 --> 00:17:41,440
of upcoming events in the city.
388
00:17:41,441 --> 00:17:43,150
There's museums
and flea markets...
389
00:17:43,151 --> 00:17:45,278
Politically
incorrect puppet shows!
390
00:17:45,279 --> 00:17:46,405
Please let me go home!
391
00:17:47,239 --> 00:17:49,490
Our dates have kept me up
late for the last two weeks,
392
00:17:49,491 --> 00:17:50,908
and if I don't go home right now
393
00:17:50,909 --> 00:17:52,577
and get nine hours of sleep
394
00:17:52,578 --> 00:17:56,081
on my Tempur-Pedic mattress,
I-I'm gonna physically collapse.
395
00:17:58,000 --> 00:18:00,001
So, you're not avoiding
making plans with me
396
00:18:00,002 --> 00:18:03,213
because you don't wanna commit
to seeing me a month from now?
397
00:18:04,131 --> 00:18:05,339
What?
398
00:18:05,340 --> 00:18:07,216
No, I'm not making plans
399
00:18:07,217 --> 00:18:10,512
'cause I can't see your phone
without my reading glasses.
400
00:18:11,096 --> 00:18:12,513
But I didn't wanna tell you that
401
00:18:12,514 --> 00:18:14,724
or admit how tired I am
402
00:18:14,725 --> 00:18:16,934
because I don't want you
to feel like you're dating
403
00:18:16,935 --> 00:18:19,313
an old guy. Just an older guy.
404
00:18:21,690 --> 00:18:24,692
I'll tell you what. How
about next Saturday,
405
00:18:24,693 --> 00:18:28,071
or however far into the
future you want me to commit,
406
00:18:28,989 --> 00:18:31,365
we'll go to my place upstate.
407
00:18:31,366 --> 00:18:33,827
Whole weekend. Just me and you.
408
00:18:36,038 --> 00:18:37,288
I choose next Saturday.
409
00:18:37,289 --> 00:18:38,581
I was hoping you would.
410
00:18:41,293 --> 00:18:42,293
Val!
411
00:18:43,545 --> 00:18:44,712
V-Valentina?
412
00:18:44,713 --> 00:18:46,298
There you are!
413
00:18:47,758 --> 00:18:49,175
Look, uh,
414
00:18:49,176 --> 00:18:51,678
I-I know we've only been
dating for a few weeks, but...
415
00:18:52,888 --> 00:18:53,931
when you know, you know.
416
00:18:56,850 --> 00:18:59,018
I've never met anyone like you,
417
00:18:59,019 --> 00:19:00,978
and I love you, and...
418
00:19:00,979 --> 00:19:01,980
I know you love me, too.
419
00:19:02,898 --> 00:19:03,898
Will you marry me?
420
00:19:06,109 --> 00:19:07,527
- Yeah, okay.
- What?
421
00:19:07,528 --> 00:19:08,778
Ah!
422
00:19:08,779 --> 00:19:10,571
She said yes! You said yes!
423
00:19:10,572 --> 00:19:12,949
Oh, my gosh, I gotta
call my mom right now!
424
00:19:12,950 --> 00:19:15,244
Oh! Sorry.
425
00:19:17,454 --> 00:19:18,663
Why would you say yes?
426
00:19:18,664 --> 00:19:20,207
I didn't
wanna be mean!
427
00:19:21,083 --> 00:19:22,917
Kids these days have,
like, zero attention span.
428
00:19:22,918 --> 00:19:24,294
He'll forget about
it by tomorrow.
429
00:19:26,171 --> 00:19:27,839
He wouldn't.
32202
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof