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1
00:00:01,551 --> 00:00:03,917
Ooh, more details
about the new Star Trek film.
2
00:00:04,087 --> 00:00:08,251
There's going to be a scene
depicting Spock's birth.
3
00:00:08,425 --> 00:00:12,020
I'd be more interested in a scene
depicting Spock's conception.
4
00:00:12,696 --> 00:00:18,157
Oh, please. For Vulcans, mating,
or, if you will, Pon farr...
5
00:00:18,334 --> 00:00:21,667
...it's an extremely private matter.
- I'd like to know the details.
6
00:00:21,838 --> 00:00:24,830
His mother was human. His father
was Vulcan. They couldn't conceive.
7
00:00:25,008 --> 00:00:28,102
Maybe they had to go to a clinic.
Can you imagine Spock's dad...
8
00:00:28,278 --> 00:00:31,975
...with a copy of
Pointy Ears and Shapely Rears?
9
00:00:33,116 --> 00:00:36,313
How come on Star Trek
everybody's private parts are the same?
10
00:00:36,486 --> 00:00:41,116
No alien lady ever told Captain Kirk,
"Hey, get your thing out of my nose. "
11
00:00:43,293 --> 00:00:44,317
Hi. Can you help me?
12
00:00:44,494 --> 00:00:46,792
I was writing an e-mail
and the A key got stuck.
13
00:00:46,963 --> 00:00:49,625
Now it's just going, "Aaaah. "
14
00:00:49,966 --> 00:00:52,127
- What'd you spill on it?
- Nothing.
15
00:00:53,169 --> 00:00:54,466
Diet Coke.
16
00:00:55,739 --> 00:00:57,707
And yogurt.
17
00:00:57,874 --> 00:00:59,136
And a little nail polish.
18
00:00:59,309 --> 00:01:00,936
I'll take a look at it.
19
00:01:01,111 --> 00:01:03,875
Gentlemen, switching
to local nerd news...
20
00:01:04,047 --> 00:01:06,982
...Fishman, Chen, Chaudury and McNair
aren't fielding a team...
21
00:01:07,150 --> 00:01:09,015
...in the Physics Bowl this year.
22
00:01:09,185 --> 00:01:12,052
- You're kidding. Why not?
- They formed a barbershop quartet...
23
00:01:12,222 --> 00:01:15,385
...and got a gig playing
Knott's Berry Farm.
24
00:01:16,059 --> 00:01:20,758
Wow. So in your world,
you're like the cool guys.
25
00:01:21,498 --> 00:01:23,659
Recognize.
26
00:01:25,001 --> 00:01:26,969
This is our year. With those guys out...
27
00:01:27,137 --> 00:01:29,833
...the entire Physics Bowl
will kneel before Zod.
28
00:01:30,006 --> 00:01:32,736
- Zod?
- Kryptonian villain. Long story.
29
00:01:32,909 --> 00:01:34,240
Good story.
30
00:01:37,614 --> 00:01:39,844
- Count me out.
- What? Why?
31
00:01:40,016 --> 00:01:43,213
You want me to use my intelligence
in a tawdry competition?
32
00:01:43,787 --> 00:01:46,984
Would you ask Picasso
to play Pictionary?
33
00:01:47,223 --> 00:01:50,283
Would you ask Noah Webster
to play Boggle?
34
00:01:50,660 --> 00:01:53,686
Would you ask Jacques Cousteau
to play Go Fish?
35
00:01:54,898 --> 00:01:57,662
Come on, you need a four-person team.
We're four people.
36
00:01:57,834 --> 00:02:00,826
By that reasoning we should also
play bridge, hold up a huppah...
37
00:02:01,004 --> 00:02:03,939
...and enter the Olympic bobsled
competition.
38
00:02:04,107 --> 00:02:06,098
Tickets to that, please.
39
00:02:07,210 --> 00:02:11,044
Sheldon, what? Do I need to quote
Spock's dying words to you?
40
00:02:11,214 --> 00:02:12,306
No, don't.
41
00:02:13,183 --> 00:02:14,912
"The needs of the many... "
42
00:02:15,084 --> 00:02:17,109
"Outweigh the needs of the few... "
43
00:02:17,287 --> 00:02:19,152
"Or the one. "
44
00:02:19,322 --> 00:02:21,381
Damn it, I'll do it.
45
00:02:47,083 --> 00:02:49,779
Okay, first order
of Physics Bowl business.
46
00:02:50,553 --> 00:02:53,989
We need a truly kick-ass team name.
Suggestions?
47
00:02:54,157 --> 00:02:57,524
How about the Perpetual Motion Squad?
48
00:02:57,827 --> 00:03:01,820
It's beyond the laws of physics,
plus a little heads up for the ladies.
49
00:03:02,765 --> 00:03:04,995
- The ladies?
- Perpetual Motion Squad...
50
00:03:05,168 --> 00:03:07,500
...we can go all night.
51
00:03:07,670 --> 00:03:09,535
- I like it.
- I don't.
52
00:03:09,706 --> 00:03:12,231
Teams are traditionally named after
fierce creatures...
53
00:03:12,408 --> 00:03:14,535
...thus intimidating one's opponent.
54
00:03:14,711 --> 00:03:16,201
We could be the Bengal Tigers.
55
00:03:16,379 --> 00:03:18,347
Poor choice. Gram for gram...
56
00:03:18,514 --> 00:03:22,610
...no animal exceeds the relative
fighting strength of the army ant.
57
00:03:23,286 --> 00:03:27,450
Maybe so, but you can't incinerate
a Bengal tiger with a magnifying glass.
58
00:03:31,060 --> 00:03:32,152
Let's put it to a vote.
59
00:03:32,328 --> 00:03:34,159
- All those in favor...
- Point of order.
60
00:03:34,330 --> 00:03:36,525
I move that any vote on team names
be unanimous.
61
00:03:36,699 --> 00:03:39,497
No man should be forced to emblazon
his chest with a Bengal tiger...
62
00:03:39,669 --> 00:03:43,161
...when common sense dictates
it should be an army ant.
63
00:03:43,339 --> 00:03:46,672
Will the gentleman from the great
state of denial yield for a question?
64
00:03:47,277 --> 00:03:49,677
- I will yield.
- After we go through the exercise...
65
00:03:49,846 --> 00:03:52,940
...of an annoying series of votes,
which the gentleman will lose...
66
00:03:53,116 --> 00:03:55,550
...does he intend to quit
if he does not get his way?
67
00:03:55,718 --> 00:03:59,085
- He does.
- We are the Army Ants. All those in favor?
68
00:04:00,924 --> 00:04:04,485
Good afternoon and welcome
to today's Physics Bowl practice round.
69
00:04:04,661 --> 00:04:06,686
I'm Penny,
and I'll be your host because...
70
00:04:06,863 --> 00:04:09,764
...I didn't have anything else
to do on a Saturday afternoon...
71
00:04:09,933 --> 00:04:12,527
...and isn't that just a little sad?
72
00:04:14,103 --> 00:04:15,661
- Gentlemen, are you ready?
Yes.
73
00:04:15,838 --> 00:04:17,931
Fire away.
- It's none of my business...
74
00:04:18,107 --> 00:04:21,338
...but is a guy who can't speak
in front of women gonna hold you back?
75
00:04:21,511 --> 00:04:24,207
Oh, he'll be okay once the women
are mixed into the crowd.
76
00:04:24,380 --> 00:04:27,907
He only has a problem
when they're one-on-one and smell nice.
77
00:04:28,084 --> 00:04:30,416
Oh, thanks, Raj. It's vanilla oil.
78
00:04:30,753 --> 00:04:34,018
I was actually the one who noticed.
Okay, let's just start.
79
00:04:34,190 --> 00:04:36,988
Okay, the first question
is on the topic of optics.
80
00:04:37,160 --> 00:04:39,060
"What is the shortest light pulse
ever produced?"
81
00:04:40,430 --> 00:04:43,797
- Dr. Cooper.
- Of course, the answer is 130 attoseconds.
82
00:04:43,967 --> 00:04:46,026
- That is correct.
- I knew that too.
83
00:04:46,903 --> 00:04:49,667
Good for you, sweetie.
Okay, next question.
84
00:04:49,839 --> 00:04:53,400
"What is the quantum-mechanical effect
used to encode data on hard-disk drives?"
85
00:04:54,811 --> 00:04:58,076
- Howard?
- The answer is giant magnetoresistance.
86
00:04:58,247 --> 00:05:00,306
- Right.
- Hey, I buzzed in.
87
00:05:00,483 --> 00:05:03,043
And I answered. It's called teamwork.
88
00:05:04,721 --> 00:05:08,282
Don't you think I should answer
engineering questions? I am an engineer.
89
00:05:08,758 --> 00:05:13,286
By that logic, I should answer anthropology
questions because I'm a mammal.
90
00:05:15,631 --> 00:05:17,098
Just ask another one.
91
00:05:17,266 --> 00:05:18,392
Okay.
92
00:05:18,568 --> 00:05:22,902
"What artificial satellite has seen glimpses
of Einstein's predicted 'frame dragging'?"
93
00:05:24,273 --> 00:05:26,400
And, of course, it's Gravity Probe B.
94
00:05:26,576 --> 00:05:29,306
Sheldon, you have to let
somebody else answer.
95
00:05:29,479 --> 00:05:31,777
- Why?
- Because it's polite.
96
00:05:32,148 --> 00:05:35,743
What do manners have to do with it?
This is war.
97
00:05:36,419 --> 00:05:38,819
Were the Romans polite
when they salted Carthage...
98
00:05:38,988 --> 00:05:41,456
...to make sure
nothing would ever grow again?
99
00:05:42,058 --> 00:05:45,289
Leonard, you said
I only had to ask questions.
100
00:05:46,996 --> 00:05:49,226
The objective is to give correct answers.
101
00:05:49,399 --> 00:05:51,367
If I know them,
why shouldn't I give them?
102
00:05:51,601 --> 00:05:54,297
Some of us might have
the correct answers too.
103
00:05:54,470 --> 00:05:57,200
- Please. You don't even have a Ph. D.
- All right, that's it.
104
00:05:57,373 --> 00:05:59,671
- Howard, sit down.
- Okay.
105
00:06:01,044 --> 00:06:04,138
- We should take a little break.
- Good idea. I need my wrist brace.
106
00:06:04,313 --> 00:06:07,612
All this button pushing is aggravating
my old Nintendo injury.
107
00:06:08,985 --> 00:06:10,009
I agree.
108
00:06:10,186 --> 00:06:11,210
What did he say?
109
00:06:11,654 --> 00:06:16,353
He compared Sheldon to a disposable
feminine cleansing product...
110
00:06:16,526 --> 00:06:19,154
...one might use on a summer's eve.
111
00:06:21,297 --> 00:06:23,959
Yeah, and the bag it came in.
112
00:06:27,837 --> 00:06:29,998
Leonard, excellent.
I wanna show you something.
113
00:06:30,173 --> 00:06:32,038
Can it wait? I need to talk to you.
114
00:06:32,208 --> 00:06:35,336
Just look. I've designed
the perfect uniforms for our team.
115
00:06:35,511 --> 00:06:38,071
The colors are based
on Star Trek: The Original Series.
116
00:06:38,247 --> 00:06:42,513
The three of you will wear support red
and I will wear command gold.
117
00:06:43,419 --> 00:06:44,909
Why do they say "AA"?
118
00:06:45,521 --> 00:06:46,647
Army Ants.
119
00:06:47,957 --> 00:06:51,825
Isn't that confusing? AA might mean
something else to certain people.
120
00:06:52,762 --> 00:06:56,562
Why would a Physics Bowl team
be called Anodized Aluminum?
121
00:06:56,899 --> 00:06:57,923
No, I meant...
122
00:06:59,268 --> 00:07:00,895
Never mind.
123
00:07:01,070 --> 00:07:02,765
Hey, check it out.
124
00:07:02,939 --> 00:07:06,067
I got you a Batman cookie jar.
125
00:07:06,242 --> 00:07:09,336
Oh, neat. What's the occasion?
126
00:07:09,512 --> 00:07:12,606
Well, you're a friend
and you like Batman and cookies...
127
00:07:12,782 --> 00:07:14,272
...and you're off the team.
128
00:07:17,787 --> 00:07:19,015
What?
129
00:07:19,188 --> 00:07:21,520
Howard, Raj and I
just had a team meeting.
130
00:07:21,691 --> 00:07:23,852
- You didn't.
- We did. I just came from there.
131
00:07:24,026 --> 00:07:27,518
I don't know where you just came from.
It couldn't have been a team meeting.
132
00:07:27,697 --> 00:07:31,599
I'm on the team and I wasn't there.
Ergo, the team did not meet.
133
00:07:32,168 --> 00:07:34,898
Okay, let me try it this way.
134
00:07:35,071 --> 00:07:37,801
I was at a coffee klatch
with a couple of friends...
135
00:07:37,974 --> 00:07:41,705
...and one thing led to another
and, it turns out, you're off the team.
136
00:07:42,712 --> 00:07:45,806
- Why?
- Because you're taking all the fun out of it.
137
00:07:45,982 --> 00:07:49,941
I'm sorry, is the winner of the Physics Bowl
the team that has the most fun?
138
00:07:50,119 --> 00:07:51,746
Okay. Let me try it this way.
139
00:07:51,921 --> 00:07:55,618
You're annoying and no one wants
to play with you anymore.
140
00:07:57,360 --> 00:07:59,055
I see.
141
00:07:59,228 --> 00:08:05,394
Well, at this point I should inform you
that I intend to form my own team...
142
00:08:05,568 --> 00:08:08,935
...and destroy the molecular bonds
that bind your very matter together...
143
00:08:09,105 --> 00:08:13,201
...and reduce the resulting
particulate chaos to tears.
144
00:08:14,944 --> 00:08:16,673
Thanks for the heads up.
145
00:08:17,380 --> 00:08:19,109
You're welcome.
146
00:08:20,183 --> 00:08:21,582
- One more thing.
- Yes?
147
00:08:21,751 --> 00:08:23,776
It's on, bitch.
148
00:08:32,595 --> 00:08:35,689
- So who did he get to be on his team?
- He won't say.
149
00:08:35,865 --> 00:08:39,699
He just smiles
and eats macaroons out of his Bat-Jar.
150
00:08:40,536 --> 00:08:44,302
He's using psychological warfare.
We must reply in kind.
151
00:08:44,473 --> 00:08:47,135
I say we wait until he looks at us,
then laugh like:
152
00:08:47,310 --> 00:08:49,676
"Yes, you are a smart
and strong competitor.
153
00:08:49,845 --> 00:08:51,472
But we are also smart and strong...
154
00:08:51,647 --> 00:08:55,083
...and we have a reasonable chance
of defeating you. "
155
00:08:56,552 --> 00:08:58,486
How exactly would that laugh go?
156
00:09:00,256 --> 00:09:03,157
Hee-hee-hee!
157
00:09:03,626 --> 00:09:04,650
That sounds more like:
158
00:09:04,827 --> 00:09:10,356
"We are a tall, thin woman who wants
to make a coat out of your dalmatians. "
159
00:09:11,467 --> 00:09:15,062
Guys, let's remember that Sheldon
is still our friend and my roommate.
160
00:09:15,238 --> 00:09:16,262
So?
161
00:09:16,906 --> 00:09:18,931
So nothing. Let's destroy him.
162
00:09:20,142 --> 00:09:21,734
Gentlemen.
163
00:09:21,911 --> 00:09:24,243
Hee-hee-hee!
164
00:09:29,285 --> 00:09:31,845
Okay, we're gonna need a strong fourth
for our team.
165
00:09:32,021 --> 00:09:35,821
You know who is apparently very smart
is the girl who played TV's Blossom.
166
00:09:37,326 --> 00:09:39,760
She got a Ph. D. In neuroscience
or something.
167
00:09:39,929 --> 00:09:44,025
Raj, we're not getting TV's Blossom
to join our Physics Bowl team.
168
00:09:45,868 --> 00:09:48,132
How about the girl from
The Wonder Years?
169
00:09:49,772 --> 00:09:53,503
Gentlemen, I believe I've found the solution
to all our problems.
170
00:09:55,878 --> 00:09:57,607
We can't ask Leslie Winkle.
171
00:09:57,780 --> 00:09:59,372
Why? Because you slept together...
172
00:09:59,548 --> 00:10:03,348
...and when she was done with you,
she discarded you like last night's chutney?
173
00:10:07,056 --> 00:10:08,546
Yes.
174
00:10:09,325 --> 00:10:13,284
- You gotta take one for the team.
- Yeah. Sack up, dude.
175
00:10:14,697 --> 00:10:16,289
Fine.
176
00:10:17,300 --> 00:10:19,860
Here I go, taking one for the team...
177
00:10:20,036 --> 00:10:22,061
...in the sack.
178
00:10:24,373 --> 00:10:26,637
- Hey, Leslie.
- Hi, guys.
179
00:10:26,809 --> 00:10:29,141
Ahem. So, Leslie,
I have a question for you...
180
00:10:29,312 --> 00:10:33,373
...and it might be a little awkward,
you know, given that I...
181
00:10:33,549 --> 00:10:35,744
Hit that thing.
182
00:10:38,421 --> 00:10:42,118
There's no reason to feel uncomfortable
because we've seen each other's faces...
183
00:10:42,291 --> 00:10:45,818
...and naked bodies contorted
in the sweet agony of coitus.
184
00:10:47,363 --> 00:10:51,163
There's not? Gee, because it sure sounds
like there should be.
185
00:10:51,967 --> 00:10:55,767
Any aspects of our sexual relationship,
regarding your preferences...
186
00:10:55,938 --> 00:10:59,374
...your idiosyncrasies, your performance,
are protected by the inherent...
187
00:10:59,542 --> 00:11:02,636
...confidentiality of the bedroom.
- That's all very comforting...
188
00:11:02,812 --> 00:11:04,677
...but I'd like to get on my question now.
189
00:11:05,748 --> 00:11:08,410
- Proceed.
- We are entering the Physics Bowl...
190
00:11:08,584 --> 00:11:10,677
...and we need a fourth.
- No, thanks.
191
00:11:10,853 --> 00:11:14,016
I'm really busy with my like-sign dilepton
supersymmetry search.
192
00:11:14,190 --> 00:11:17,091
Dilepton shmylepton, we need you.
193
00:11:17,860 --> 00:11:19,020
Sorry.
194
00:11:19,995 --> 00:11:21,519
Well, we tried.
195
00:11:21,697 --> 00:11:26,031
We'll just have to face Sheldon
mano y mano y mano a mano.
196
00:11:26,202 --> 00:11:28,466
Wait, you're going up against
Sheldon Cooper?
197
00:11:28,637 --> 00:11:31,162
- Yes.
- That arrogant, misogynistic...
198
00:11:31,340 --> 00:11:35,140
...doorknob that told me I should abandon
my work with high-energy particles...
199
00:11:35,311 --> 00:11:38,576
...for laundry and childbearing?
200
00:11:40,850 --> 00:11:42,477
She's in.
201
00:11:44,720 --> 00:11:46,551
So how do you feel?
202
00:11:46,722 --> 00:11:49,714
Nice and loose? Come to play?
Got your game face on?
203
00:11:51,227 --> 00:11:52,922
- Are you ready?
Oh.
204
00:11:53,095 --> 00:11:55,893
Yeah. You don't have to stay
for the whole thing.
205
00:11:56,065 --> 00:11:58,761
Oh, no, no, I want to.
Sounds really interesting.
206
00:11:58,934 --> 00:11:59,958
Okay.
207
00:12:05,775 --> 00:12:07,208
- Gentlemen.
- Sheldon.
208
00:12:07,376 --> 00:12:10,504
- Sheldon.
- Hee-hee-hee.
209
00:12:11,981 --> 00:12:13,744
Sheldon.
210
00:12:15,317 --> 00:12:17,217
I'm just gonna sit down.
211
00:12:20,923 --> 00:12:22,515
So is that your team?
212
00:12:22,892 --> 00:12:24,291
Actually, I don't need a team.
213
00:12:24,460 --> 00:12:28,419
I could easily defeat you single-handedly,
but the rules require four.
214
00:12:28,597 --> 00:12:32,897
So may I introduce the third-floor janitor,
the lady from the lunch room and...
215
00:12:33,068 --> 00:12:36,970
My Spanish is not good.
- Either her son or her butcher.
216
00:12:37,606 --> 00:12:38,834
And what about your team?
217
00:12:39,008 --> 00:12:42,034
What rat have you recruited
to the S.S. Sinking Ship?
218
00:12:42,211 --> 00:12:44,270
Hello, Sheldon.
219
00:12:46,949 --> 00:12:47,973
Leslie Winkle.
220
00:12:48,150 --> 00:12:50,641
Yeah, Leslie Winkle.
The answer to the question:
221
00:12:50,820 --> 00:12:53,550
"Who made Sheldon Cooper cry
like a little girl?"
222
00:12:54,457 --> 00:12:58,655
Yes, well, I'm polymerized tree sap,
and you're an inorganic adhesive.
223
00:12:58,828 --> 00:13:02,628
So whatever verbal projectile you launch
in my direction is reflected off of me...
224
00:13:02,798 --> 00:13:06,029
...returns on its original trajectory,
and adheres to you.
225
00:13:06,869 --> 00:13:08,996
Oh, ouch.
226
00:13:09,472 --> 00:13:12,134
Okay, if everyone could please
take your seats?
227
00:13:20,115 --> 00:13:22,015
Here's your T-shirt.
228
00:13:25,020 --> 00:13:26,453
PMS?
229
00:13:26,622 --> 00:13:28,681
It's a couple days early.
230
00:13:28,858 --> 00:13:30,382
No.
231
00:13:30,559 --> 00:13:33,255
It stands for Perpetual Motion Squad.
232
00:13:33,429 --> 00:13:35,420
Oh, right, of course.
What was I thinking?
233
00:13:37,299 --> 00:13:42,532
Good afternoon, everyone,
and welcome to this year's Physics Bowl.
234
00:13:43,839 --> 00:13:47,331
Today's preliminary match
features two great teams:
235
00:13:47,776 --> 00:13:52,679
AA versus PMS.
236
00:13:52,848 --> 00:13:54,839
All night long, y'all.
237
00:13:59,288 --> 00:14:02,416
Okay, well, let's jump right in.
First question.
238
00:14:02,591 --> 00:14:07,927
For 10 points. "What is the isospin
singlet partner of the pi-zero meson?"
239
00:14:09,365 --> 00:14:11,196
- PMS?
- The eta meson.
240
00:14:11,367 --> 00:14:12,629
Correct.
241
00:14:14,537 --> 00:14:16,095
- Formal protest.
- On what grounds?
242
00:14:16,272 --> 00:14:19,400
The Velcro on my wrist brace
caught on my shirt.
243
00:14:19,575 --> 00:14:22,544
Denied. All right, for 10 points.
244
00:14:22,711 --> 00:14:26,579
"What is the lightest element on Earth
with no stable isotope?"
245
00:14:28,050 --> 00:14:30,109
- AA?
- And, of course, the answer is technetium.
246
00:14:30,286 --> 00:14:32,015
Terrific.
247
00:14:32,388 --> 00:14:35,949
Next question. "What is the force
between two uncharged plates...
248
00:14:36,125 --> 00:14:37,956
...due to quantum vacuum fluctuation?"
249
00:14:39,328 --> 00:14:41,091
- PMS?
- And Sheldon can suck on...
250
00:14:41,263 --> 00:14:43,128
...the Casimir effect.
Correct.
251
00:14:48,604 --> 00:14:51,437
"How does a quantum computer
factor large numbers?"
252
00:14:52,808 --> 00:14:54,400
- PMS?
- Shor's algorithm.
253
00:14:54,577 --> 00:14:55,601
Correct.
254
00:14:59,615 --> 00:15:02,948
Four-point-one-eight-five-five times 10
to the seventh ergs per calorie.
255
00:15:03,118 --> 00:15:05,052
Pr�vost's theory of exchanges.
256
00:15:05,254 --> 00:15:07,552
Lambda equals one over pi-R-squared N.
257
00:15:07,723 --> 00:15:09,588
Seven hundred and sixty degrees Celsius.
258
00:15:09,758 --> 00:15:12,818
The approximate temperature
of the young lady in the front row.
259
00:15:13,862 --> 00:15:15,830
Mr. Wolowitz,
this is your second warning.
260
00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:18,897
A sigma particle.
261
00:15:19,068 --> 00:15:22,469
Yes, assuming the hypothetical planet
has a mass greater than the Earth.
262
00:15:22,638 --> 00:15:24,265
Correct.
263
00:15:28,911 --> 00:15:32,813
Ladies and gentlemen,
I hold in my hand the final question.
264
00:15:33,849 --> 00:15:40,220
The score now stands,
AA, 1150, PMS, 1175.
265
00:15:40,389 --> 00:15:43,722
So for 100 points and the match...
266
00:15:43,892 --> 00:15:48,386
...please turn your attention
to the formula on the screens.
267
00:15:48,564 --> 00:15:50,293
Solve the equation.
268
00:15:52,067 --> 00:15:53,864
Holy crap.
269
00:15:55,337 --> 00:15:56,497
What the hell is that?
270
00:15:56,672 --> 00:16:00,335
It looks like something they found
on the ship at Roswell.
271
00:16:00,509 --> 00:16:04,172
- Come on, think. Leslie?
- It's not gonna work if you rush me.
272
00:16:04,346 --> 00:16:08,146
- You have to let me get there.
- You are never gonna let that go, are you?
273
00:16:08,317 --> 00:16:09,545
Ten seconds.
274
00:16:14,189 --> 00:16:15,520
PMS?
275
00:16:16,625 --> 00:16:18,718
Sorry, I panicked.
276
00:16:19,595 --> 00:16:20,823
Then guess.
277
00:16:20,996 --> 00:16:22,623
Um...
278
00:16:23,532 --> 00:16:25,261
Eight.
279
00:16:28,771 --> 00:16:31,399
Point four.
280
00:16:31,774 --> 00:16:33,799
I'm sorry, that's incorrect.
281
00:16:33,976 --> 00:16:37,935
AA, if you can answer correctly,
the match is yours.
282
00:16:41,150 --> 00:16:44,381
He doesn't have it. He's got squat.
283
00:16:53,562 --> 00:16:55,621
AA, I need your answer.
284
00:16:57,800 --> 00:16:59,961
The answer is minus eight pi alpha.
285
00:17:00,135 --> 00:17:02,069
Hang on a second.
That's not our answer.
286
00:17:02,237 --> 00:17:04,205
- What are you doing?
- Answering question.
287
00:17:04,373 --> 00:17:06,568
Winning Physics Bowl.
288
00:17:08,043 --> 00:17:10,011
How do you know anything
about physics?
289
00:17:10,179 --> 00:17:14,582
Here, I am janitor.
In former Soviet Union, I am physicist.
290
00:17:15,084 --> 00:17:16,881
Leningrad Politechnika.
291
00:17:17,386 --> 00:17:19,217
Go, Polar Bears.
292
00:17:22,124 --> 00:17:23,648
That's a delightful little story.
293
00:17:23,826 --> 00:17:26,090
Our arrangement was
you sit and not say anything.
294
00:17:26,261 --> 00:17:28,786
- I answer the questions.
- You didn't answer question.
295
00:17:28,964 --> 00:17:32,229
Hey, look. Now, maybe you have democracy
now in your beloved Russia...
296
00:17:32,401 --> 00:17:35,268
...but on this Physics Bowl team,
I rule with an iron fist.
297
00:17:35,437 --> 00:17:36,734
Ow!
298
00:17:37,406 --> 00:17:39,397
AA, I need your official answer.
299
00:17:39,575 --> 00:17:41,634
- It's not what he said.
- Then what is it?
300
00:17:41,810 --> 00:17:43,971
- I want a different question.
- You can't.
301
00:17:44,146 --> 00:17:45,340
- Formal protest.
- Denied.
302
00:17:45,514 --> 00:17:46,981
Informal protest.
303
00:17:47,750 --> 00:17:49,342
Denied.
304
00:17:49,518 --> 00:17:52,612
- I need your official answer.
- No, I decline to provide one.
305
00:17:52,788 --> 00:17:56,087
That's too bad because the answer
your teammate gave was correct.
306
00:17:57,559 --> 00:17:59,993
That's your opinion.
307
00:18:02,197 --> 00:18:04,757
- All right, the winner of the match is...
- Hang on.
308
00:18:05,167 --> 00:18:09,729
Sheldon, is proving you are single-handedly
smarter than everyone else so important...
309
00:18:09,905 --> 00:18:13,363
...that you would rather lose by yourself
than win as part of a team?
310
00:18:14,910 --> 00:18:16,844
I didn't understand the question.
311
00:18:18,280 --> 00:18:20,771
- Go ahead.
- The winner is PMS.
312
00:18:58,787 --> 00:19:00,982
Sorry, somebody's sitting there.
313
00:19:01,490 --> 00:19:05,620
- Who?
- My Physics Bowl trophy.
314
00:19:07,396 --> 00:19:10,661
That trophy is meaningless.
I forfeited, therefore you did not win.
315
00:19:10,833 --> 00:19:12,892
- I know someone who would disagree.
- Who?
316
00:19:13,068 --> 00:19:15,400
My Physics Bowl trophy.
317
00:19:16,572 --> 00:19:18,767
"Leonard is so smart.
318
00:19:18,941 --> 00:19:21,603
- Sheldon who?"
- All right, that is just very immature.
319
00:19:21,777 --> 00:19:22,937
You're right. I'm sorry.
320
00:19:23,111 --> 00:19:25,409
"I'm not!"
321
00:19:26,548 --> 00:19:29,210
- Okay, new contest.
What are you doing?
322
00:19:29,384 --> 00:19:33,548
I am settling, once and for all,
who is the smartest around here.
323
00:19:33,722 --> 00:19:35,349
- Okay? Are you ready?
- Absolutely.
324
00:19:35,524 --> 00:19:36,991
- Bring it on.
Okay.
325
00:19:37,626 --> 00:19:41,790
"Marsha, Jan and Cindy were
the three daughters in what TV family?"
326
00:19:46,268 --> 00:19:47,326
The Brady Bunch.
327
00:19:48,370 --> 00:19:50,099
Okay.
328
00:19:50,272 --> 00:19:54,106
"Sammy Hagar replaced David Lee Roth
as the lead singer in what group?"
329
00:19:58,947 --> 00:20:00,812
The Brady Bunch?
330
00:20:02,918 --> 00:20:03,942
Van Halen.
331
00:20:04,953 --> 00:20:08,116
All right. "Madonna was married
to this Ridgemont High alum. "
332
00:20:10,425 --> 00:20:12,655
Oh, my God. Sean Penn.
333
00:20:12,828 --> 00:20:15,228
How do you know these things?
334
00:20:15,631 --> 00:20:18,998
I go outside and I talk to people.
335
00:20:20,302 --> 00:20:22,497
Okay, here.
"What actor holds the record...
336
00:20:22,671 --> 00:20:25,504
...for being named People magazine's
Sexiest Man Alive?"
337
00:20:25,874 --> 00:20:28,399
- William Shatner.
- Wait.
338
00:20:30,279 --> 00:20:32,076
I don't think it's Shatner.
339
00:20:32,247 --> 00:20:34,511
Then it's gotta be Patrick Stewart.
340
00:20:37,286 --> 00:20:40,153
- No.
- Formal protest.
341
00:20:41,723 --> 00:20:44,851
All right. "Singer who sang
'Oops! I Did It Again'?"
342
00:20:49,798 --> 00:20:51,265
Okay.
343
00:20:52,134 --> 00:20:54,932
"Tweety bird thought he saw a what?"
344
00:20:58,974 --> 00:21:00,874
Romulan.
345
00:21:04,446 --> 00:21:08,007
Yes. He thought he saw a Romulan.
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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