All language subtitles for Lodge 49 s01e02 Moments of Truth in Service.eng

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[ ELECTRONIC CHIRP ]

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- Hey.
- All right, you made it.

Want a beer?

MAN ON TV: Run, my creation! [LAUGHTER]

All right. Have a good flight.

- See ya.
- Bye.

Bye.

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[SNAKE HISSING]

[GROANS]

Aah!

Aah!

Aah! Aah! Uhh.

Aah!

MAN: And finally, Your Honor,

last week I caught him
just sitting in his car

across the street, watching us.

I chased him off, but he came
back later that night

and jumped in our pool.

He was wasted and screaming his head off.

Our son can't sleep.

He's worried about this guy
breaking into our house.

Your Honor, I know he used to live there,

and I am sorry for whatever happened,

but this has to stop.

Mr. Dudley, you can respond.

Well, first of all, let me just
say how embarrassed I am

that it's come to this.

There's really no excuse for my behavior.

And I don't know.

Something happens to you
when you lose your job.

And it's just... afternoons are hard.

Not doing what you usually do.

So you start to feel
a little... a little weird,

a little guilty, you know.

And 2:00... 2:00, 2:00's the worst.

It's just the way the light hits ya.

You know, it gets under your skin.

And, you know, it can make you,
make you go a little crazy.

You know? [LAUGHS]

Now does that...
that make any sense or...

No.

Look, the point... the point is,
is that I was drinkin'...a lot,

uh, you know, it wasn't
the fun kind of drinking either.

Uh, but I'm on a better path
now, Your Honor.

I recently entered the Order of the Lynx.

Is that a rehab facility?

No. No, it's a secret society.

It's not secret, secret, you know,

you can Google 'em or whatever.

But it was founded in 1866
by Harwood Fritz Merrill.

Mr. Dudley, this is
the last hearing before lunch.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
of course. I'm sorry.

Um, I have an appointment with
a temporary employment agency.

So... I am trying, Your Honor.

But most of all, what I really
wanna say to you guys is...

I'm sorry.

I'm truly sorry.

The idea of your kid
being scared like that's...

it's the worst thing I can
ever possibly imagine.

So... I was lucky to grow up
in that house.

And I kind of dreamed of

raising a family of my own
one day in there.

But I guess...

all I care about now is that your son

is as happy in there as I was.

So I won't come back. I promise.

Your Honor, I think he means
what he says.

Maybe at this point, the best thing to do

is drop the... the complaint.

Beautiful. Lunch.

Uh, hey, thank you for understanding.

And now that, you know, we're all cool,

I'd love to make it up to you guys

and maybe I could, you know,
bring over some burgers,

crank up the BBQ, how does that sound?

- Are you serious?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure. Why not?

- Why not? Because... no.
- Okay.

- It is our house now.
- Okay, yeah.

Okay, private property.

It's your hou... oh,
it's private property?

You know what? Why don't you
paint the house puke yellow?

- Your damn right I will.
- You know what? My dad...

he busted his ass for 30 years
paying for those rose bushes.

I don't give a shit about your dad!

- Okay, you know what?
- Yeah, what? What?

- Hey, you know what, man?
- Ah, ah, ah, ah!

- Oh, my God!
- Out of the way!

Tell me about your strengths.

My strengths?

[SNIFFS] Uh, well, as you can see,

my test scores indicate that my strengths

are certainly not PowerPoint or Excel.

[LAUGHS]

Okay, um...

if you don't hear from me in
the next six or seven weeks,

feel free to give me a call.

[CHUCKLES]

- MAN: Your r�sum� for me?
- MAN #2: Yeah, here you go.

MAN ON RADIO: Stone walked
halfway across the bridge.

Down below, moonlight shimmered
on the dark waters

of the Vltava River.

The cocaine was wearing off,

- and the night felt empty.
- [MOTOR REVVING]

- Now more than ever...
- [SWITCH CLICKS]

[MOTOR RUMBLES, IDLES]

2 grand. It's all there.

Hey, didn't you play fullback at Poly?

I played baseball at Poly.
My senior year, I was All-CIF.

Well, you know, honorable mention.

- [ENGINE REVVING]
- You need a helmet!

[EXHALES DEEPLY]

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Synced & corrected by -robtor-
www.addic7ed.com

Hey. How's Larry? Heard
he's back in the hospital.

He's fine. s Larry? Getting all fixed up.

It's weird seeing you out here alone.

You know, if anything happens,

come see me about a memorial bench.

Listen, man, he's not dead, okay?

You're next, Ernie.

- What?
- Tee's open. You're up.

[CART WHIRRING]

I got 3 calls this morning before 10 a.m.

- I'm sick of it.
- You're past due.

You're already garnishing my wages.

Like, what more do you want from me?

- [TELEPHONE RINGING IN DISTANCE]
- Um...

Well, your monthly payments went up.

Didn't you get the letters we sent?

No, I burned them.

I don't know what else to tell you.

It was all part of
the agreement you signed.

No. I-I co-signed to help my dad.

He didn't tell me how bad things were,

and then he checked out.

He died and left me with this mess.

I'm so sorry.

It's 80 grand. It could be worse.

Do you have debt?

Oh, um, student loans.

Luckily, I was able to defer
those for a long time.

You took out loans
to become a loan officer?

Yeah. [CHUCKLES]

Well done. You're living the dream.

Well, if you think things are bad now,

wait until we sell your debt
to a third party collector.

- What?
- Unless you start catching up,

it will probably happen
in the next month or so.

And I promise you, those guys
will make your life

a living hell. I promise you.

- [HUFFS]
- Thank you for coming in.

Take a mug if you'd like. They're free.

[TELEPHONE RINGING IN DISTANCE]

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

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[RING]

[RING]

[BEEP]

MAN: Hello, you've reached
the Lynx Lodge 49.

- Please leave a message.
- [BEEP]

DUD: Hey. Is anyone in there?

It's Dud again, you know,
from the other...

from the other night.

I kind of wish you guys
would post your hours.

[LAUGHS] Anyway, listen, Ernie,
if you get this,

I'm ready to get started on
my journey toward knighthood

or squiredom or whatever.

Anyway, I'm sure you guys
got more important things

going on, so I hope Larry's doing better.

Okay, call me back. It's Dud.

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[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]

Here you go, guys. Whenever you're ready.

- Thank you so much.
- WOMAN: Thanks.

Jeremy wants to see you in his office.

Why?

[KNOCK ON DOOR, DOOR CREAKS]

Hey, you wanted to see me?

Hey, Sarah says that
this looks ridiculous.

What do you think?

I mean, she told our therapist.

[LAUGHS] Our therapist. She
couldn't even tell me directly.

I mean, that's part of
the problem right there, right?

It's really busy right now.
I should probably be out there.

No, no, no. Just if you could, you know,

sit, come. [SIGHS]

So... [SIGHS]

You can probably guess
what this is about.

Look, they were gonna get rotten anyway,

and I figure I might
as well just take them.

Take what?

The avocados.

You've been stealing avocados?

- Yes.
- I don't care.

Take as many as you want.
They're the good kind of fat.

Oh. So... why am I here?

Look, this is hard. Okay, um...

I've decided to promote Karen
to assistant manager.

That's fine.

Yeah, I know you've been here for a year,

and she's only been here
for three months,

but it is all political.

Omni HQ likes Karen because
she did the calendar.

But I told them that you
were the best we had

in terms of brute labor.

Jeremy, seriously, it's fine.
I don't want a promotion.

- Why not?
- Because the bank will take it.

I need to be on tables. I need the cash.

That's a relief. I-I thought you
were gonna be mad at me.

No. Never.

Bring it in for a hug.

- No.
- Okay. Fair enough.

But listen, we also hired a new girl.

Or... young woman.

She's gonna be shadowing you this week.

Okay.

And I told her that she's gonna
be working with Liz Dudley.

[CLICKS TONGUE] Queen of Shamroxx.

Long story short, it's a bit of a mess.

Obviously, Mooch buys a lot of china.

So we need to fix this ASAP.

You mean, I need to fix this.
Mooch is my customer.

Exactly. That's why I'm counting on you.

Why the hell would you quote
him that price?

- Are you insane?
- I don't know.

It was me and Mooch like the old days.

Paradise Lounge has that
happy hour with the oysters.

We were having a blast.
I didn't wanna ruin the mood.

So now, I get to jump on the grenade.

Thank you for your service
to our country.

Okay, next item on the agenda...

Gleeson Pipe is sponsoring
a sport fishing day.

Some charter boat out
to San Clemente Island.

It's a big jerk-off for their plumbers.

They've reserved a spot
for me and one more.

- What do you say, Beautiful Jeff?
- I'm in.

Whoa. I make the ultimate sacrifice,

and Beautiful Jeff
gets to go on a cruise?

That's right, you old piece of shit.

Beautiful Jeff is having
a better year than you.

Only because he's slinging Pex

to all the Korean
export guys in Cerritos.

- [LAUGHTER]
- Pex Pipe is the future.

I'm the future. You'll be dead soon.

Pex Pipe is lightweight garbage.
That's why you can sell it.

Lightweight. Hmm. Look at this.

[LAUGHS] That's all cosmetic.
You're a mannequin.

This is the real thing.

- [LAUGHTER]
- Right here. Real human man flesh.

Fine. Let's do this.

You do more than me,
you can take the cruise.

[LAUGHS]

- MAN: Oh! [ CHUCKLES ]
- MAN #2: Yeah.

Easy peasy, bitch.

MAN: All right. Here we go.

- I could do this all day!
- Ahh!

- BOTH: Ahh!
- [MEN SHOUTING AT ONCE]

[GULPING]

I'm impressed, Ernie.

I thought you were gonna
die of a heart attack.

Not bad for an old man.

Thanks. Have fun on the high seas.

Hey. Where's my commission check?

Any day now.

You're still my butter and egg man.

[TELEPHONE RINGING IN DISTANCE]

[EXHALES DEEPLY]

Hmm.

- Here we go. Pistols at dawn.
- Come now, Mooch.

You know we can't give you that price.

It's too late.

I already quoted Bob's price
to Glen at TC Mechanical,

and he wants to put in a big order.

So the market is set.

Goddamnit.

[SIGHS] I'll take the hit
with the factory, okay?

[BAG RUSTLES]

So, um, I hear you know something about

the Orbis redevelopment.

[CHUCKLES] No. I'm just riding
rumors like everyone else.

[CRUNCHES, MOUTH FULL]
What are you hearing?

Everybody's waiting for Captain
to send up smoke signals.

If I could just chase Captain down,

I could get our lines spec'd early.

[LAUGHS] Good luck.

I mean, every plumber
and wholesaler in SoCal

is gonna be chasing this project.

It's the Holy Grail.

[MACHINE BEEPING IN DISTANCE]

Got this in '81 at the Cuckoo's Nest.

I was 13. My older brother snuck me in.

We went mad dog in the pit.

And then after the show,
a couple skinheads jumped us.

One of them had a knife.
[MAKES WHOOSHING SOUND]

He got me.

And my brother lit his ass up
with a piece of rebar.

It all evens out.

So that's Champ.

And this is Gerson. He's bussing
our section today.

If he slacks, feel free
to screw him on tips.

And I don't slack... unless I'm high

or having weird emotions.

Okay, let's go. Kill floor awaits.

You're in great hands, Heather.
Liz is the best.

So did you read the training manual?

Grooming standards and all that?

I did, yes.

This is a place of glamour
and fun. Never forget that.

I don't really understand
the motto, though,

"Moments of truth in service."

Oh, I know. It's just
high-level corporate poetry.

It just means anticipating
the needs of customers.

So, in about five minutes,

those guys are gonna want another pitcher

and knowing that is
my Shamroxx moment of truth.

Maybe someday,
you'll have one of your own.

MAN: Oh, yeah! Whoo-hoo!

So, are you in school?

I am. Um, I'm actually taking
business classes at Golden West.

My cousin and I are going
to open a hair salon.

- Oh, entrepreneurs.
- Oh, we're trying.

- [CLEARS THROAT]
- So what about you?

- What are you doing?
- I'm working here.

??

The nurses we talked to seemed worried.

Larry's not responding well.
He's still really out of it.

Those doctors are useless.

The refuse to administer
the supplements I provided.

So I had to do it sub rosa.

How is he with you, Ernie?

Me? Fine.

I mean, I haven't had a chance
to go over since the surgery.

I've been busy.

Besides, it's just bypass surgery.

- Quadruple bypass.
- Yeah.

Right, they knock
those things out every day.

Larry's gonna be fine.

I'm going tomorrow afternoon.

I'm sorry, Ernie, but I think
we gotta prepare for the worst.

Yeah, I went to Harbor Municipal.

I put a deposit on a memorial bench.

What? No, stop it.

You guys are trying to bury him alive.

You haven't seen him, Ernie.

Then there's everything
that's happening here.

We got to get in touch with London.

We need to let them know what's going on.

- Scott...
- Ernie, there are strict protocols

- for appointing a new S.P.
- Scott, just listen.

I wasn't supposed to say
anything, but last week,

Larry told me he's stepping down.

He's finally making me
Sovereign Protector.

- No way.
- [LAUGHS]

Congratulations.

- Love you, too. Love you, too.
- [CHUCKLES]

- Okay, yeah.
- Way to go, man.

Yeah, but I... but I mean,

London should still be involved, right?

I mean, they might... hey, um,

look, there are other worthy candidates.

I'm just saying we shouldn't get too
far ahead of ourselves on this.

If it'll make you feel better, Scott,

I'll call London, and we'll
sort it all out, okay?

Anything else?

Uh, Sean Dudley called.
Left another message.

Are you gonna be working with him?

I guess so. We sort of
mentioned it the other night.

I'd reach out. He might lose interest.

These are fish bones. Look at this.

[KEYS JINGLE]

Oh, my gosh. As far down as you can see.

[DOOR CLOSES, LOCK CLICKS]

[KEYS CLATTER]

Lizard.

They gave me a restraining order.

- Jesus. For how long?
- Three years.

The judge said their attacks
on me were justified.

I told you to let me come with you.

[CRUNCHING]

Why? Because you were
a paralegal for 10 minutes?

Because I could've helped.
You need help, Dud.

Look.

It's been a year, okay?

- It's time...
- Yeah. Well, you know what?

You can't have a funeral
without a body. So shut it.

There will never be a body, okay?

It's not an excuse anymore.

What are you doing?

Dud.

Get out of my room.

I am so tired of your depressing shit.

I don't need help. You need help.

- [DOOR BANGS]
- I don't need help!

I took responsibility like an adult!

And guess what, Dud?

It was depressing,
but you... don't... get... a...

- pass!
- Ow!

Ow.

[INHALES SHARPLY] Ohh.

[SIGHS]

[SIGHS]

[BREATHING HEAVILY]

[PRESSING BUTTONS]

[LINE BEEPS]

MAN: [BRITISH ACCENT] Lodge 1, London.

Hi. I'm Ernie Fontaine.

The Luminous Knight at Lodge 49
in Long Beach, California.

Oh, yeah. Lodge 49,
one of our success stories.

What?

You have one of the most robust
memberships in North America.

Wow.

Okay.

I'm calling because
we're about to go through

the whole succession thing.

I think our Sovereign Protector,

Larry Loomis, has been in touch.

He's stepping down and
giving me the throne.

I see.

We haven't actually
heard from Mr. Loomis,

but thank you for telling us.

Really? Well...

What happens now?

You guys send out an emissary, right?

Uh, wherever possible, we like
to oversee transitions.

You can expect a visitor
in the next few weeks.

Uh, until then, take care, Mr. Fontaine.

And congratulations.

Thank you.

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[COUGHS]

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[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]

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One, two, three, four,

five, six, seven, eight, nine...

40, 41, 42.

WOMAN: It's open.

[OPERA MUSIC PLAYING]

I just had a call from
Lodge 49 in California.

They're doing succession.

Huh, okay. I just sent Anil to Marseille,

and Clara has her surgery,
so I guess I'm sending you.

Oh.

Okay.

Is there a problem?

No, it's... just a very long flight,

and... [SIGHS]
I have tickets to the Ashes.

Jocelyn, when we made you an emissary,

- it was understood that you'd...
- I know. I know. I'm sorry.

I'll start the paperwork immediately.

[DOOR CLOSES]

One, two, three, four, five...

We're a manufacturer's rep.

Basically, the middle man
between the factory

and the wholesaler.

[CRUNCHES] But I spend a lot
of time chasing down plumbers

trying to get them to buy
our lines from the wholesaler.

- [CHUCKLES]
- Anyway, we rep 20 lines.

Toilets, faucets, brass, PVC pumps.

Nice.

It's not as exciting as it sounds.

But it used to be. Before the crash,

I could write business all day.

Now everything is just a hustle.

[MOUTH FULL] Oh. What kind
of pumps do you sell?

- Morley.
- Morley. Yeah.

It's a good line. It's easy to install.

So you don't work on pools
at all anymore?

No. No, I... all my gear got liquidated,

so I can't really do heavy
maintenance with my foot.

Ah. Right.

Yeah. But it's cool. You know.

I just need to find somethin'
to keep me busy,

until I figure out how to...
how to get my dad's shop back.

[SIPS]

So... your postulancy.

Yes. My postulancy. So what's next?

Well, we'll keep meeting up,

and you'll need to track down Blaise.

He'll get you started on the alchemy

and philosophical stuff.

There'll be a few things
you need to memorize.

But honestly, you could
take it or leave it.

Most people leave it.

And how long does it take
to become a squire?

Like, a few months or weeks or...

Well, it depends.

Once we can see that you are dedicated,

there's a whole secret ceremony.

Cool, a secret...
What happens at the ceremony?

Well, I can't tell you that.

But basically, there's a solemn oath,

and then, we will begin to
entrust you with the mysteries.

Entrusted with the mysteries.

- [CHUCKLES]
- That's...

That's so cool. That's all I ever wanted.

We usually order a pizza
or something afterwards.

Cool.

- Thank you for everything.
- Mm.

- Thank you, Dud.
- And tell Larry hello for me.

Whoa, whoa.

Actually, I've got a work emergency.

Is there a chance...
if you're not doing anything,

could you go by and see Larry?

Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah, of course.

- Maybe read a book to him?
- Yeah.

- [LAUGHS]
- Yeah, that'd be no problem.

If Larry hits me, I'll just hit him back.

[LAUGHS]

[SCANNER BEEPS]

- There you go.
- Thank you.

Thanks.

Hi.

Hi.

[COINS CLATTER]

You are the first guy under 50

I've seen check out one of these.

Oh, it's not for me.

It's for a friend.
He's an old Vietnam vet.

- See? The old guys love Tom Stone.
- [BEEP]

- [BEEP]
- He's a boxer and art dealer

and a secret agent.

Okay. Enjoy.

Yeah.

Hi.

"At midnight, Pavel entered the lobby.

"It was now or never.

"Stone reached into his overcoat,

took the safety off his .228
just in case."

The True Lodge sent you.

[SIGHS]

Ernie did.

I'm S... I'm Sean.

You met me at the Lodge the other night.

Do... Do you remember?

Remember, you...

you really...

And I thought she was crazy.
I didn't believe her.

- Who?
- Oh.

- Hey.
- Hey.

- What are you doing here?
- Oh, Ernie told me to come by, so...

Really? Well, that's
incredibly nice of you.

Is... is Ernie coming?

- No. No, he's got a work thing.
- Work.

- Yeah.
- Right.

- Yeah.
- Ernie.

I need to talk to Ernie.

He's not here, Lar.
But hey, he told us the news.

- He did?
- Oh, don't worry. No, no, no.

He's gonna call London
and take care of everything.

You just need to rest.

You don't need to stay.

I'm just gonna sit here and work.

I'll keep him company.

Oh. Okay, yeah. Good idea.

[CHAIR SCRAPES FLOOR]

[LOWERED VOICE]
Hey, does Larry have any family

- that ever stops by?
- Nah. He's an old bachelor.

- Oh.
- Doesn't have any family.

Just the Lodge.

All right, well... [LOUDLY] See you, Lar.

[BIRDS CAWING]

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??

[DOOR CREAKS]

[DOOR OPENS]

Hey, Liz!

I, uh, I got some toilet paper.
I used the coupon you gave me.

[DOOR CLOSES, LOCK CLICKS]

Hey... Hey, Liz.

Hey, Liz. I got the toilet paper.

Liz?

What do you wanna do for dinner?

[FOIL RUSTLES]

He's a... he's a really nice guy, too.

It's funny. We both have a backgroundo.

In residential hydronics.

Yes! More parasailing. Ha.

That is the only way you can
truly get to know someone.

It sounds like Ernie deals
more with fixtures like

faucets and sinks and toilets
and that kind of thing.

Get ready, Caitlin,

for the greatest adventure of your life.

- [CHUCKLES]
- [CHUCKLES]

[TV PLAYING INDISTINCTLY]

Liz, I think I got a crush on somebody.

You are not Caitlin's type.

No, no. Not Caitlin.

It's... It's for real.

It's... she works at the library.

- [TV TURNS OFF]
- A librarian.

- Mm-hmm.
- Wow.

Yeah, I know. It's awful.

Is she mousy? How mousy is she?

- [CHUCKLES]
- Is she an actual mouse?

Yes, she's an actual mouse.

This is progress.
You're rejoining the world.

- Yeah.
- Have you talked to her yet?

Uh, just today.

- Okay.
- I'm afraid if I keep going back there,

she's gonna think I'm some sort
of, like, creepy stalker person.

Mm. Well, you do have a restraining order

against you. So...

It's for... it's for civil harassment.

- Yeah.
- So that's different.

- The best kind.
- [LAUGHS]

Ah.

It's just been so long.

I guess I just stopped thinking
about that sort of thing

this year, you know?

Yeah.

I know what you mean.

And to be honest, it's been
a while since I...

You know.

You know.

Listen to me, you just need
to get it over with.

Go up to the desk and ask her out.

- Be direct.
- Yeah.

- Okay, yeah, direct.
- Mm.

I'm telling you, something's
going on at Orbis.

I wanna go after Captain.

If we can get with him
on this Orbis deal...

Come on, Ernie, you're never
gonna get to Captain.

He lives in a different world.
Developers, architects.

With these big money guys at the top,

it's all shadows and secret handshakes.

That's not us.

We're simple men.

We just need to keep
our wholesalers happy.

- What are you trying to prove?
- Nothing.

Is this because you got
torched by Beautiful Jeff?

I don't know.

[SCOFFS]

I just need this.

I'm tired of the nickel and dime.

These big projects just never pan out.

I'm just saving you a ton of hassle.

Okay. [CLEARS THROAT]

- [SCANNER BEEPS]
- Thank you.

- Hi.
- Hi.

I'm Sean.

I came in here yesterday.

What can I help you with?

[GROANS]

- Hi.
- Hi.

[SCANNER BEEPS]

ALICE: Hey, did you hear?

Somebody found a seal wandering
down Willow Street.

Really?

I guess he got lost
and swam up the channel.

Animal rescue said it happened
a few times now.

Something about rising
water temperatures.

I'll be right back.

This is 900 square feet.

- Really?
- Yeah. Give or take.

Hello, gentlemen.

[DOOR CLOSES]

Hi, Sean.

Colby, this is Sean Dudley.
His dad was the previous tenant.

- Cool.
- Mm-hmm.

Yeah. So, what kind of...

what kind of shop
you opening up here, huh?

Vape lounge.

Nice. Vape lounge. Vape city.

Love it.

Just what we need...

- [Pants unzip
- ...in this town...

[GRUNTS]

- [URINATING]
- ...is one more vape lounge.

[GROANS]

- [INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]
- Hey, how's it going?

- Okay, thanks.
- Oh, Heather's a natural.

She doesn't need me anymore.

Huh.

Oh, my God. Jeremy, who is this?

This is Floyd.

Hi. He's beautiful. Can I hold him?

Sure. Here, get under
his arms right there.

Oh!

Whoa! Hello!

- Got him? Okay.
- Heather, your order's up.

Hey, can you hold him for a sec?

No.

I don't like holding babies.

Oh, come on. Look how cute he is.

[ SINGSONGY ] You know
you wanna hold him.

["CARD TABLE" BY HOLLY GOLIGHTLY PLAYING]

??

? Yeah, I'm thinking ?

MAN: Whoo-hoo!

? Let your head spin ?

[GRUNTS]

? The nights are long,
the days are gone ?

[DOOR CLOSES]

? And you don't know
what place you're in ?

??

- Where's she going?
- [DOOR CLOSES, ENGINE STARTS]

??

What the hell did you say to her?

DUD: So this is Lodge 1 in London

where Harwood Fritz Merrill's buried?

That's the allegorical picture.

Merrill actually painted that one.

Right. And he's buried
with the golden book.

The allegorical golden book.

Yeah, the one he found in the desert

with all the secret formulas for alchemy

and the universal elixir
that can turn, um,

that can turn lead into gold.

That's the allegorical history.

There's a lot of legend
surrounding Merrill.

Um, they're fun,

but we actually know a lot
about the actual man.

He was badly wounded in the Crimean War,

spent the next 10 years
wandering around Europe,

and the Mediterranean
until he went to London

and founded the Order.

For him, alchemy was a metaphor

for the transformation of the soul.

In alchemy, we ask the question,

how can you get something from nothing?

So he didn't turn lead into gold?

Um...

[INHALES DEEPLY]

That's a metaphor.

??

Listen, Merrill believed

there were two kinds of alchemists.

First is the charlatan

who was just looking
for a shortcut to fortune.

And the next was
the true philoso... ow! Ah.

- Oh. Oh, whoa.
- Aah. Aah.

- Uh, are you okay? That's...
- Uh-huh.

Ah. Um... the true philosopher,

who used that world out there
as a beautiful text

just waiting to be deciphered.

We just need to learn how to look at it

with the right eyes. Okay?

It's bingo night.

I have to set up the Throne Room

for the bluehairs.

Well, I can... I can help.

Okay.

- [DOOR CLOSES]
- In here.

You, uh, need some more...

No, I'm good, thanks.

- [KEYS JINGLE]
- Let's see here.

[HYMNAL MUSIC PLAYING, LOCK TURNING]

??

[MUSIC STOPS]

So... so this... this is the Throne Room?

- This is the Throne Room.
- Oh, yeah.

Start with chairs and then
we'll go get the tables.

Okay.

- Ah.
- Um...

I'm glad you're here.
You know, people have

a hard time committing to joining.

Yeah, well, I hate to say it,

but it might help if you
lower your membership fee.

I know. 200 bucks is a little steep.

You mean $2,000.

If it was $2,000, no one would be here.

[CHAIRS CLATTERING]

??

[CHAIR THUDS]

??

["DOWN PNX" BY WHITE FENCE PLAYING]

? Addicted to feeling up ?

? Nausea, merry we go ?

? On round pistol planet,
and "I'm so sorry" ?

? I'm down, so down ?

??

[HORN HONKS]

??

[HORN HONKS]

What? There's no place for us to go.

[HORN HONKING]

Are you blind? There's no place
for any of us to go!

Huh? Well, you honk
your little horn again.

Huh? There's no place to go!

??

[BRAKES SQUEAL]

[ENGINE TURNS OFF]

[DOG BARKING IN DISTANCE]

??

??

[EXHALES] Okay.

??

??

[WATER SPLASHING]

[CLACKING]

??

??

??

[AIRPLANE ENGINE ROARING]

??

[SEABIRDS CALLING]

??

??

??

??

??

Right back the way you came,
darling. Can't miss it.

[MAN SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY IN DISTANCE]

Hey, there you are. Bingo night...

still a source of revenue
if you can believe it.

[CHUCKLES]

Blaise told me you took off earlier.
Is everything okay?

You owe me 2 grand.

I never thought you'd show up
with all that money.

But you took it.

I've got a commission check coming.

I'm going to pay you back.

I was always going to pay you back.

I don't want your money, Ernie.

Yes, you do.

No. Take the money
and put it in the Lodge

to my dues for the next 10 years.

Are you serious?

I wanna take the squire oath now.

Absolutely. Yeah, why not?
We can do that next week.

And I want a key so I can come
inside whenever I need to.

- I can't give you a key.
- I want a key, Ernie.

You know, when I'm out there...

I feel like I'm all alone.

And all these things chasing me, it's...

It's dragons and dickheads.

But it's different in here.

I can see what this place is.

I can feel it.

Can't you?

WOMAN OVER P.A.:
...call extension 2-2-1-9.

Dr. Tolliver, extension 2-2-1-9.

[GASPS]

[GASPS]

They must've moved him.

Excuse me. Can you tell me where
you guys moved Larry Loomis?

He checked himself out about an hour ago.

Said he was going to Egypt.

And you guys let him walk out
of here in that condition?

Patient's rights.

Told you. The dude's immortal.

- [ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]
- [CHUCKLES]

Hey, it's Dad. Just calling
to say hi, you know.

No biggie. Call me back.

Lizard, hey!

Dud leaves for his trip tomorrow.

Thought we'd start up the grill,

do a little send-off.

I know it's a hassle driving up here,

- but I would lo...
- [DOOR CLOSES]

[CLEARS THROAT]

Hey.

- [DOOR CLOSES]
- Hey.

["SUNLIGHT BATHED
THE GOLDEN GLOW" BY FELT PLAYS]

??

[REMOTE CONTROL CLICKS]

??

? You're trying to fool somebody ?

? But you end up fooling yourself ?

? You're reading from
the book of the dead ?

? But you don't know what it's about ?

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