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-Would you like some tea, brother?-Yes, please, sister.
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Wow, four out of five.
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-Not bad, Sonu. You're doing great. Stud.-Do you want to hear a joke?
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Yes. Go for it.
5
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A guy was eating some street food�andhe sneezed and farted at the same time.
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So, he said, "Great, whoeverjust remembered me
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also bust my ass."
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Are you crazy? Where did you hear that?
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-Did he make a mistake again, brother?-No, no mistake.
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Mom, I recited the Moon poem�for him.
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Yes, the Moon poem.You are very smart, Sonu.
12
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Okay, let's go. Bye, brother.By the way, when is sister back?
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She was supposedto come back today.
14
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But I think she murdered someone.
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I can't get to her on the phone,and when I do, she doesn't talk.
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Maybe she is on the run.
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-It was on the news.-It was, right?
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-They showed a photo, too.-Exactly.
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-They said she is on the run.-Yes.
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Who is on the run?
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Moving on to the next award nowand the winner for
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Glucon-D Most Enthusiastic Employeegoes to Chadda Sir.
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Madam. Chadda Madam.
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-So, how many awards are left?-Nine.
25
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No.
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Can't believe we go through thisevery year.
27
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It'll be another half an hour.
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Dude, I'm going to die.Please, give me the lemonade.
29
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I don't mind being bored like this,but don't like the process.
30
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Miss Goa 2018, how are you?
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Guess what? I have a holiday today.
32
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Dhruv! Not again.
33
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It's the founder's death anniversary.
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-How's your hangover?-Don't ask. I feel like shit.
35
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-I'm sure you look like shit.-Shut up.
36
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I'm going to jump on youwhen I see you.
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I've been eating a lot of junkso that my bones don't hurt you.
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Listen to this joke. There was a manwho was eating street food--
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Listen, I've got to go. Talk to you later.
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Hey! You ruined the joke.
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Hey, I'm serious.
42
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And that's me at the top of�Khardung La.
43
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Khardung La anyone?Okay, for those who don't know,
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Khardung La happens to be the highestmotorable road in the world.
45
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-Wow.-In the world.
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And this was kind of a special day for me.
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Not for the right reasons, though.
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I woke up with 101 fever.
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Yeah. And everyone around megave the same reaction,
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they said,"Brother, you are going to die."
51
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But I had waited for this momentfor the last 10 years of my life.
52
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And I couldn't just let it go.
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So I told myself,
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"Raunak, even if somethinghappens to you
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while you are chasing your dreams,
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you wouldn't die with any regrets.
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You will never look back and say what if."
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-What a bunch of crap, so cliche.-He's so hot.
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So, if you feel somethingin your heart,
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or if you have a dream,
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just go and take a chance on yourself.
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And you'd be surprised at�what lifehas to give you back in return.
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And if nothing else...
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at least a cool profile picture.
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Pay attention to that dream carefully.
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-What?-Pay attention to that dream carefully.
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Correct. Applause.
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That's all, ladies and gentlemen.
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What's going on there?
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-Let's take a selfie, too.-No, thanks.
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-The mountain dog doesn't sleep much---Doesn't eat much, either.
72
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But he's very active.
73
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But the city dogs sleep all day.
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-Hi.-Hello.
75
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-How much is it?-25 but you can give me 20.
76
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-Twenty?-You won't get it for less.
77
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That's what I am saying.It's 50 in Mumbai.
78
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-Petrol prices.-He's right.
79
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-The prices of global crude oil...-Thank you.
80
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affect the prices of transportation.
81
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And which is the second largest factor
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that affects the pricesof fruits and vegetables.
83
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We bargain with these people,
84
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when actually it is Trumpand the sheikhs to be blamed for it.
85
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-Interesting.-You're Kavya, right?
86
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-Yes.-And what did you win?
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It is called Mentos No Lack of Ideas.
88
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What?
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It basically means I am extremely idleand I have a lot of time to think about
90
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great ideas to make your dull day fun.
91
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But tell me something.Doesn't the routine get to you?
92
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-I doubt I can ever---I know what you mean.
93
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But the thing is that�not everyoneis unhappy with their corporate job.
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-What about you?-I think I'm happy.
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I mean, when I quit my previous job,
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I tried to do a lot of different things,
97
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like, I tired my hand at pottery,at organic farming,
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I even did graphic designingfor some time.
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-Really?-When I was doing all of this,
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I realized that I was really missingthe structure of things.
101
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The financial security.
102
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The great Indian middle class values.
103
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-Nice view, right?-Very.
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Yes, I got the chilies and the gram flour.
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Yes, coriander, too.Okay, Aunty. I will let you know.
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Yes. I got the gram flour.All right. Okay, Aunty.
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-Making pitla bhakri, brother?-Yes, sister.
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Okay, thank you.
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You know what this light reminds me of?
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The evening prayers?
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That also.
112
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But there is a place called Chaudandas.
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It is somewhere around 80 kilometers awayfrom Almora.
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So a couple of years backI was crossing it.
115
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And the highway police told me that
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I should spend the night at�Chaudandasbecause there were some landslides.
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I was very tired. So I slept.
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Now, after a few hours,
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I wake up to this general banter, okay?
120
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And I see some 20, 30 menwho have gathered for tea and biscuits.
121
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And what was surprising wasthat they were telling each other stories.
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Like, romantic stories, folk tales.
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These grown mentelling each other stories, right?
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I was very surprised. I went to oneof the guys asked, "Is today special?"
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He said, "No, this happens every day."
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-That's interesting, but how come...-So...
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turns out that about five years ago,
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some dude must have gifted thema radio set, okay?
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Now that radio setbecame everything for them.
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That was the only source of entertainment.
131
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So after work, everybody wouldgather around and listen to the radio.
132
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So music, news, information for farmers,
133
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basically anything and everything.
134
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And one day that radio stopped working.
135
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Oh, no. Then?
136
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They tried everything.They tried everything to fix it.
137
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But they couldn't. So, eventually,they got fed up with the radio set,
138
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but they had to fill that void, right?
139
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So they started tellingeach other stories.
140
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-Okay, wow.-Yeah.
141
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So somewhere in India right now, 6:30,
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as a "routine"
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people are telling each other stories.
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Wow, it's...
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It's like walking into a library
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and suddenly books starttalking to each other.
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Yeah.
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I think that's how I'm going to�endthe story from now on.
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Thank you.
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Also routine isn't too badas you must have realized.
151
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-Sure.-Kavya!
152
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I need to pee, bro. Let's go.
153
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-Okay. So, stay in touch, maybe?-Yeah. You, too.
154
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You know what?Actually I'm coming to Bombay.
155
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I'm planning to do the Western Ghatstretch in 23 days.
156
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-Wow, it's that specific?-I love to plan.
157
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Never works out though.
158
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So if you are free around that time,
159
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maybe you could take me around?
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Yeah, my boyfriend and Ican show you around.
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-Why not? Yeah.-Yeah?
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-9819...-Yeah.
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573295.
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All right. See you.
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-See you.-See you.
166
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My sloth beer.
167
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It's not "beer" Dhruv. Bear!
168
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-Yeah, yeah. How are you?-Good.
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Hug properly.We're meeting after three days.
170
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Did you get the bathroom slippers?
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Yeah? And the bathrobe?
172
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-I'm not stealing a bathrobe for you.-Why not?
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You've done it before.
174
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-I got you�bebinca cake.-Really?
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Dude, fuck, but I can't eat this.Give me your hand. Feel this.
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Can you feel them? Dude, man boobs.
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It's really scary.
178
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Guneet says thatafter a while they never go away.
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How scary is that?I've got man boobs, dude.
180
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Kavu, you okay?
181
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Yeah, I'll just shower and come.
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Yeah, you must be tired.
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Okay, we'll have dinner when you're done.
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Okay.
185
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You should get that shower fixed, Dhruv.
186
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Blueberry shower gel?
187
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-Blueberry with honey.-Smells nice, dude.
188
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-Pithla bhakri?-Yes.
189
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-Some new Maharashtrian place?-Yes.
190
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-How's it?-It tastes exactly like my mom's.
191
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-What? Really? Okay.-It's really nice.
192
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What place is this?
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Well, this is...One second, even I want to try.
194
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Momo's kitchen.
195
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-You made this?-Yeah.
196
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Before going to the�offsite you said
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that you are cravingyour mother's pithla bhakri.
198
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So I thought I'll�ask her for the recipe.
199
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It's actually pretty simple.
200
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You really do like it, right?
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Very nice.
202
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I think I followedthe instructions correctly.
203
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She even called me twice, thriceto ask me how I'm doing. So sweet.
204
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By the way,Aakash's cousin has sent the video,
205
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for dance practice.
206
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It's a good dance. It should be simple.We'll manage. No problem.
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Send it.
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What is up?
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-What do you mean?-What is up?
210
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Dude, there is some wrong.
211
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You are not smiling like a fooland you should be.
212
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And you haven't taken a photo of thisand put it on your Instagram story.
213
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So there is something definitely wrong.
214
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Let's just enjoy this, Dhruv.
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This is not how one enjoys. Noneof us is going to be able to enjoy.
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Tell me!
217
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What's that "hmm"? Is that a yes or a no?
218
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Dude, why do people write "hmm"while texting?
219
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Isn't it like so fucking pointless?
220
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Yo!
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What?
222
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If I ask you something,will you be honest with me?
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Yeah.
224
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Promise?
225
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Yes, dude, I made it.
226
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With my own hands.
227
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It's very easy. I made it.
228
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-I know, Dhruv.-Then what?
229
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Dhruv, do you ever feel like...
230
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you should have dated someone else?
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What?
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Answer me.
233
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What do you mean answer you?No. I mean...
234
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I don't thinks so, no.
235
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I am with you,
236
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I'm having�pithla bhakri, I stay here,
237
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and I am very happy, dude.
238
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-Okay.-I mean, I'm...
239
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-It's good.-Okay.
240
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-Let's make this easier for you.-Yeah, okay.
241
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What is the kind of girl you wanted todate when you were in college?
242
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Wait. Are you asking me my type?
243
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After all these years,you are asking me my type?
244
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I think maybe you are my type.
245
00:15:05,565 --> 00:15:07,805
Dude, I don't know what my type is, okay?
246
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I mean, I've been dating youfor so long, now...
247
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What is happening? Why are you asking methese questions today?
248
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Okay.
249
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Today at the off-site,there was this biker dude.
250
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His name was Raunak.
251
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He's known to travel across India, he...
252
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He's a travel blogger and a photographer.I mean...
253
00:15:43,605 --> 00:15:47,045
Initially, he came across asa typical show-off.
254
00:15:47,805 --> 00:15:51,525
But then we were talking, and he had thesereally interesting stories to tell.
255
00:15:51,605 --> 00:15:52,925
Biker dude, no?
256
00:15:53,405 --> 00:15:55,525
I mean, he doesn't have a proper job,
257
00:15:56,165 --> 00:15:59,085
but he's so sorted.He likes to plan things.
258
00:16:01,525 --> 00:16:05,125
And then somehow we exchanged numbers,and he just texted me.
259
00:16:05,205 --> 00:16:07,045
You gave him your number?
260
00:16:07,205 --> 00:16:09,085
Dhruv, I'm trying toexplain something else.
261
00:16:09,165 --> 00:16:11,685
Yeah, Kavya, but...
262
00:16:13,565 --> 00:16:15,165
did you flirt back?
263
00:16:19,165 --> 00:16:21,165
-Kavya?-No. dude.
264
00:16:21,245 --> 00:16:22,525
I mean, no, I...
265
00:16:24,045 --> 00:16:26,805
I was just behaving differently.You know, I...
266
00:16:28,205 --> 00:16:29,605
I was on my best behavior.
267
00:16:31,805 --> 00:16:34,605
Yeah. That's what we call flirting.
268
00:16:34,685 --> 00:16:36,525
Dhruv, that's not the point.
269
00:16:37,605 --> 00:16:38,685
Really?
270
00:16:38,765 --> 00:16:40,245
I told him I have a boyfriend.
271
00:16:40,365 --> 00:16:43,285
I told him when he comes to Bombay,we'll take him around.
272
00:16:44,365 --> 00:16:46,925
What? Motherfucker.
273
00:16:47,045 --> 00:16:50,325
Sorry, but, motherfucker.What is happening?
274
00:16:51,245 --> 00:16:53,045
We'll take him around? Come along, dude.
275
00:16:53,125 --> 00:16:55,205
Dhruv, will you calm down?
276
00:16:57,965 --> 00:16:59,965
Yes, okay, now tell me.
277
00:17:02,405 --> 00:17:04,405
Okay, firstly, this is not about him.
278
00:17:04,525 --> 00:17:06,085
-Okay?-Yeah, okay.
279
00:17:06,245 --> 00:17:09,045
It's just that this whole situationmake me feel like...
280
00:17:10,125 --> 00:17:13,765
what is someone is better suited for me,
281
00:17:13,845 --> 00:17:17,365
someone else. I mean,not just me, even you?
282
00:17:17,485 --> 00:17:20,165
Don't you ever thinkthat someone is better suited for you?
283
00:17:20,245 --> 00:17:23,365
Like is this it?Isn't there someone better--
284
00:17:23,445 --> 00:17:25,365
Yes, I get the point.
285
00:17:27,365 --> 00:17:30,925
So you've never thought about this?Tell me the truth.
286
00:17:33,965 --> 00:17:36,925
To tell you the truth,I'm thinking about just one thing.
287
00:17:37,405 --> 00:17:39,005
That I woke up in the morning
288
00:17:39,125 --> 00:17:40,645
and bought gram flour for you,
289
00:17:40,805 --> 00:17:44,765
got detailed instructions from your momand made�pithla bhakri for you,
290
00:17:44,965 --> 00:17:48,245
and you have been partying with a roadie.
291
00:17:49,245 --> 00:17:51,885
-Why are you laughing, madwoman?-Roadie?
292
00:17:52,045 --> 00:17:54,405
Yes, he's a roadie. Biker.
293
00:17:55,365 --> 00:17:58,445
That's not the point, dude.It's not about him.
294
00:17:58,525 --> 00:18:00,525
That's what I'm trying to tell you.It's about...
295
00:18:01,485 --> 00:18:03,645
It's about making a choice.
296
00:18:03,845 --> 00:18:07,085
Like how will we ever know thatthis is good enough?
297
00:18:07,165 --> 00:18:09,325
There could be someone,something better.
298
00:18:09,445 --> 00:18:12,325
Yeah, obviously.Obviously there will be something better.
299
00:18:12,405 --> 00:18:14,685
-Yes, then?-Then...
300
00:18:14,765 --> 00:18:16,925
As in then what? Then...
301
00:18:18,205 --> 00:18:19,645
Then you will never be happy.
302
00:18:19,725 --> 00:18:21,845
It's not like that, Dhruv.
303
00:18:22,885 --> 00:18:25,045
Working towards my future makes me happy.
304
00:18:25,125 --> 00:18:28,485
Working towards making things betterfor us makes me happy.
305
00:18:28,565 --> 00:18:31,605
Yeah, but wait. What's wrong with this?This is perfect.
306
00:18:31,685 --> 00:18:33,645
See, nothing is wrong with this.
307
00:18:33,765 --> 00:18:36,965
This is not about us.I'm just, in general, saying that...
308
00:18:37,765 --> 00:18:39,765
-I mean, there is a person---Yeah.
309
00:18:40,645 --> 00:18:43,565
Trying to make the best out ofwhat you have
310
00:18:44,365 --> 00:18:46,045
is what everything is about.
311
00:18:46,165 --> 00:18:48,645
Like, that is the most difficult thing.Isn't it?
312
00:18:52,605 --> 00:18:54,285
I don't know.
313
00:18:55,965 --> 00:18:59,925
Okay, seriously, the thoughtdoes cross my mind, too.
314
00:19:00,925 --> 00:19:01,965
Even I am human.
315
00:19:03,765 --> 00:19:06,845
So when I met that girl in Bombaywho happens to be from Delhi or that side,
316
00:19:06,965 --> 00:19:08,805
so there arecommon reference points, right?
317
00:19:08,885 --> 00:19:10,885
It's same conversation.You had dumplings from there?
318
00:19:10,965 --> 00:19:12,405
Did you have street food from there?
319
00:19:12,565 --> 00:19:14,045
And when I'm talking about, dude,
320
00:19:14,165 --> 00:19:17,445
the sunshine feels wonderfulwhen you sit on the roof in the winter.
321
00:19:17,565 --> 00:19:19,765
So she gets it. And obviously, right?
322
00:19:20,165 --> 00:19:22,925
And just like that, obviously,there will be guys who are better than me,
323
00:19:23,005 --> 00:19:25,085
better looking than me.That's bound to happen.
324
00:19:25,645 --> 00:19:27,405
But if they make you laugh the way I do,
325
00:19:27,485 --> 00:19:30,285
if you open up to them in the waythat you have opened up to me,
326
00:19:31,885 --> 00:19:33,725
then I will feel very messed up.
327
00:19:35,965 --> 00:19:39,925
I mean, as people, you and Iare pretty ordinary, dude.
328
00:19:40,485 --> 00:19:44,565
We are not ultra special.We are not superstars.
329
00:19:45,205 --> 00:19:49,285
But this makes me feel special, dude.This is good, right?
330
00:19:49,365 --> 00:19:52,765
When we're together, it's fun. It's nice.
331
00:19:53,325 --> 00:19:57,645
So, I don't mind being ordinarybecause this is nice.
332
00:20:00,725 --> 00:20:02,325
Yes, you know what?
333
00:20:03,165 --> 00:20:06,685
It's like�Leicester City winning�thePremier League. It's exactly like that.
334
00:20:06,765 --> 00:20:08,925
Yes, that's what this is. For sure.
335
00:20:09,005 --> 00:20:09,965
-Yeah.-What?
336
00:20:10,045 --> 00:20:11,085
Sit straight.
337
00:20:11,165 --> 00:20:13,165
Yeah, it's like...
338
00:20:13,685 --> 00:20:17,845
So, the odds of Leicester City winningthe Premier League were 5000 to�1.
339
00:20:17,925 --> 00:20:22,485
The odds of Mahatma Gandhi being aliveright now are actually more than that.
340
00:20:23,125 --> 00:20:24,085
So how did they win?
341
00:20:24,965 --> 00:20:26,645
Because of chemistry. See.
342
00:20:26,725 --> 00:20:28,525
There are two, three exceptional players,
343
00:20:28,605 --> 00:20:32,725
the rest of the team was okay, but theyplayed well as a unit. Cohesion, yes!
344
00:20:32,965 --> 00:20:35,245
Cohesion is the wordthat the coach kept on using.
345
00:20:35,365 --> 00:20:37,365
Yeah, they played well as a unit.
346
00:20:38,285 --> 00:20:40,285
And what are we, you and I?
347
00:20:41,285 --> 00:20:42,805
We are also a team.
348
00:20:44,325 --> 00:20:46,325
We will watch�Andaz Apna Apna.
349
00:20:46,845 --> 00:20:49,565
On Sunday.
350
00:20:51,325 --> 00:20:52,605
Thank you for this.
351
00:20:53,165 --> 00:20:55,565
-It was amazing.-Yeah? It's good, right?
352
00:20:59,285 --> 00:21:01,285
Dude, but I feel like eating�bebinca.
353
00:21:01,525 --> 00:21:03,245
You know what?
354
00:21:03,485 --> 00:21:06,885
I can have two scoops of vanilla ice creamwith bebinca,
355
00:21:07,005 --> 00:21:11,965
put some mint leaves and someBaileys Irish Cream.
356
00:21:12,885 --> 00:21:15,405
-Fuck.-You must, Mr. Man Boobs.
357
00:21:17,165 --> 00:21:18,805
Don't say stuff like that.
358
00:21:20,325 --> 00:21:23,605
Actually, fuck it, you can say it.But, seriously,
359
00:21:23,805 --> 00:21:27,045
what if they just stick thereand they continue to grow?
360
00:21:28,645 --> 00:21:31,085
-Then what happens?-I think it will be amazing.
361
00:21:31,645 --> 00:21:34,285
-We can go bra shopping---Fuck off, dude. Get lost.
362
00:21:35,565 --> 00:21:37,805
-What is it?-Don't worry about yours.
363
00:21:38,725 --> 00:21:41,205
-I'll love them as much as I love you.-Really?
364
00:21:44,485 --> 00:21:46,485
Oh, fuck, what can't I hear him?
365
00:21:48,325 --> 00:21:52,125
Where is your roadie?Roadie, see this, this is love.
366
00:21:54,525 --> 00:21:56,645
-I'm sorry.-For flirting?
367
00:21:56,965 --> 00:21:58,645
-I didn't---Yeah, okay.
368
00:22:19,565 --> 00:22:21,565
What happened? Do you want some?
369
00:22:22,645 --> 00:22:25,645
No, Dhruv.Let's try something new today, okay?
370
00:22:25,925 --> 00:22:28,165
Try drinking your green teawithout making that sound.
371
00:22:29,245 --> 00:22:31,805
I can do it. But it won't feel as good.
372
00:22:31,925 --> 00:22:33,365
I'm middle class.I can't do anything.
373
00:22:43,005 --> 00:22:44,365
Shall I tell you something?
374
00:22:46,365 --> 00:22:48,365
I did find it a bit weird
375
00:22:48,605 --> 00:22:50,965
when you were talking about that roadie.
376
00:22:52,045 --> 00:22:56,605
A little bit. But, yes, dude.It was weird.
377
00:22:59,685 --> 00:23:01,125
Actually...
378
00:23:02,485 --> 00:23:04,565
even I found it weirdto tell you about it.
379
00:23:05,365 --> 00:23:07,005
Yeah, I mean...
380
00:23:07,165 --> 00:23:09,565
But if I didn't tell you,it would be unfair.
381
00:23:10,845 --> 00:23:13,845
But the uncomfortable talksincrease the comfort.
382
00:23:14,565 --> 00:23:18,965
Yes, it's better to say somethinguncomfortable that is bothering us
383
00:23:19,085 --> 00:23:20,445
than not to say it at all, right?
384
00:23:21,565 --> 00:23:24,325
Jerk, repeating my words to me in English?
385
00:23:26,725 --> 00:23:28,645
What happened to�Leicester Cityafter that season?
386
00:23:28,725 --> 00:23:29,965
After that season?
387
00:23:30,725 --> 00:23:33,205
They almost got delegated, man.They played badly.
388
00:23:33,325 --> 00:23:35,325
-What?-Yeah, look at your face.
389
00:23:35,805 --> 00:23:37,005
-Seriously?-Yes.
390
00:23:37,565 --> 00:23:40,565
That's another story.We don't have to worry about that.
391
00:23:52,805 --> 00:23:56,325
Dhruv? Will you please get some water?
392
00:23:56,405 --> 00:23:58,605
-Get lost.-I'm thirsty.
393
00:23:58,685 --> 00:24:00,445
-You get it.-But I'm tired.
394
00:24:00,565 --> 00:24:02,565
-So even I am tired.-Please.
395
00:24:02,725 --> 00:24:04,165
Just go and get it, dude.
396
00:24:05,205 --> 00:24:08,605
-Damn. Just because of your�pithla bhakri.-At least it was of some use.
397
00:24:10,485 --> 00:24:13,525
Listen. Get me a bottle of water as well.
398
00:24:13,925 --> 00:24:15,925
Thirst is very contagious at night.
399
00:24:16,045 --> 00:24:18,445
-If one gets thirsty, so does the other.-You talk too much.
400
00:24:19,605 --> 00:24:22,045
The light switch is outside.Why are you back?
401
00:24:22,165 --> 00:24:23,365
I'm back now!
402
00:24:23,445 --> 00:24:25,885
-What is this?-You go!
403
00:24:26,005 --> 00:24:28,005
What do you mean, "you go"?You were right there!
404
00:25:57,245 --> 00:25:59,245
Subtitle translation by Neeti Ray
405
00:25:59,295 --> 00:26:03,845
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