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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,883 --> 00:00:03,373 Previously on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend... 2 00:00:03,398 --> 00:00:05,100 Whoever this Josh Chan is, 3 00:00:05,125 --> 00:00:06,758 you are, you're obsessed with him. 4 00:00:06,760 --> 00:00:08,009 So you're saying that I moved here from New York 5 00:00:08,011 --> 00:00:09,961 and I left behind a job that would've paid me 6 00:00:09,963 --> 00:00:12,213 $545,000 a year for a guy 7 00:00:12,215 --> 00:00:15,120 I dated for two months when I was 16 at a summer camp? 8 00:00:15,145 --> 00:00:17,671 - I did not do that. - What's the deal with you and Josh? 9 00:00:17,696 --> 00:00:19,229 Josh isn't my type. 10 00:00:20,867 --> 00:00:22,534 But, like, speaking of types, 11 00:00:22,536 --> 00:00:25,170 - like, what type's his girlfriend? - I should go. 12 00:00:25,172 --> 00:00:26,288 Did you see this r?sum?? 13 00:00:26,290 --> 00:00:27,589 Harvard? Yale? 14 00:00:27,591 --> 00:00:29,074 What the hell is she doing here? 15 00:00:29,076 --> 00:00:31,910 I was working hard at a New York job 16 00:00:31,912 --> 00:00:33,845 Making dough but it made me blue 17 00:00:33,847 --> 00:00:35,464 One day I was crying a lot 18 00:00:35,466 --> 00:00:36,715 And so I decided to move 19 00:00:36,717 --> 00:00:38,416 To West Covina, California 20 00:00:38,418 --> 00:00:39,601 Brand new pals and new career 21 00:00:39,603 --> 00:00:41,656 It happens to be where Josh lives 22 00:00:41,681 --> 00:00:44,015 But that's not why I'm here 23 00:00:44,040 --> 00:00:46,452 - She's the crazy ex-girlfriend - What? No, I'm not. 24 00:00:46,477 --> 00:00:48,310 She's the crazy ex-girlfriend 25 00:00:48,312 --> 00:00:49,594 That's a sexist term. 26 00:00:49,596 --> 00:00:50,929 She's the crazy ex-girlfriend 27 00:00:50,931 --> 00:00:52,264 Can you guys stop singing for just a second? 28 00:00:52,266 --> 00:00:54,406 She's so broken inside 29 00:00:54,431 --> 00:00:56,178 The situation's a lot more nuanced than that. 30 00:00:56,203 --> 00:00:58,046 C-R-A-Z-Y 31 00:00:58,071 --> 00:00:59,320 Okay! We get it! 32 00:00:59,623 --> 00:01:01,171 Crazy ex-girlfriend. 33 00:01:01,195 --> 00:01:03,195 -- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -- -- www.addic7ed.com -- 34 00:01:03,459 --> 00:01:05,148 REBECCA: Ugh... 35 00:01:05,173 --> 00:01:06,389 It's so hot. 36 00:01:06,605 --> 00:01:08,021 Is it always this hot? 37 00:01:08,046 --> 00:01:09,062 Yeah. 38 00:01:09,262 --> 00:01:11,429 You're getting a sexy SoCal farmer's tan. 39 00:01:11,454 --> 00:01:13,037 Now, that's a good look. 40 00:01:13,220 --> 00:01:14,720 - So I've been thinking about it... - Yes? 41 00:01:14,722 --> 00:01:16,471 And there could be, like, 42 00:01:16,473 --> 00:01:18,674 a million reasons why Josh hasn't texted me back. 43 00:01:18,676 --> 00:01:20,625 Look, he specifically wrote in his text: 44 00:01:20,650 --> 00:01:23,265 �Want to grab dinner? Smiley face.� 45 00:01:23,290 --> 00:01:25,206 Which is the least he can do, since you left 46 00:01:25,231 --> 00:01:27,365 your great job and moved to this dump to be with him. 47 00:01:27,390 --> 00:01:29,289 Hey! I didn't move here for him, remember? 48 00:01:29,314 --> 00:01:30,614 I moved here because I needed a change 49 00:01:30,639 --> 00:01:32,170 and Josh just happens to be here. 50 00:01:32,195 --> 00:01:33,171 Get it straight. 51 00:01:33,196 --> 00:01:36,113 Oh, are we still doing that? Okay. 52 00:01:36,193 --> 00:01:38,143 All right, just let me know when we can stop, because 53 00:01:38,145 --> 00:01:40,420 I actually want to know what's keeping him 54 00:01:40,445 --> 00:01:41,670 from having dinner with his dear old friend 55 00:01:41,696 --> 00:01:43,571 - from summer camp. - I don't know. 56 00:01:43,595 --> 00:01:45,898 - What are you... Don't do that. - Let's see what he's been up to. 57 00:01:45,923 --> 00:01:48,473 - You can't take a person's personal electronic... - I just did 58 00:01:48,498 --> 00:01:50,281 Oh, look at this. 59 00:01:50,306 --> 00:01:51,906 What? Wait, wait, wait. Has he updated his status 60 00:01:51,931 --> 00:01:52,992 in the last 20 minutes? 61 00:01:53,711 --> 00:01:54,812 Not that I've been checking, I was... 62 00:01:54,837 --> 00:01:57,007 Checking? Oh, that is amateur hour. 63 00:01:57,032 --> 00:01:59,032 You gotta change your push notifications. Look. 64 00:01:59,057 --> 00:02:01,460 He is going to a club called Spiders 65 00:02:01,485 --> 00:02:03,101 with his friends tonight. 66 00:02:03,126 --> 00:02:05,093 And so, we will, too. 67 00:02:05,118 --> 00:02:07,068 Spiders. I drove by there the other night. 68 00:02:07,093 --> 00:02:08,342 It was hopping. 69 00:02:08,367 --> 00:02:09,482 But I always wonder, though, 70 00:02:09,507 --> 00:02:10,523 is it possessive Spider's 71 00:02:10,548 --> 00:02:11,631 or plural Spiders? 72 00:02:11,656 --> 00:02:13,405 Because every time I see a flyer for it, 73 00:02:13,406 --> 00:02:15,223 the apostrophe's in a different location. 74 00:02:15,484 --> 00:02:16,691 What difference does it make? 75 00:02:16,693 --> 00:02:17,892 It doesn't make a difference, it's just, like, 76 00:02:17,894 --> 00:02:19,027 it's two different things. 77 00:02:19,029 --> 00:02:21,079 Like, either the club is owned by a spider 78 00:02:21,081 --> 00:02:23,364 or the club is filled with, like, a bunch of spiders. 79 00:02:23,366 --> 00:02:24,532 So... it's a different thing. 80 00:02:24,534 --> 00:02:26,067 Okay, let's go back to what you were saying. 81 00:02:26,069 --> 00:02:27,068 You know what? 82 00:02:27,070 --> 00:02:28,119 I actually really like your idea. 83 00:02:28,121 --> 00:02:29,087 Let's go to Spider's tonight. 84 00:02:29,089 --> 00:02:30,421 (gasps) Just, like, as a gal date. 85 00:02:30,423 --> 00:02:32,040 Like, not-not 'cause Josh is there. 86 00:02:32,042 --> 00:02:33,407 In fact, I hope Josh isn't there, 87 00:02:33,409 --> 00:02:36,177 so that when I do my sexy 88 00:02:36,179 --> 00:02:37,762 dance moves, it's just for me. 89 00:02:37,764 --> 00:02:39,297 It's just for me. 90 00:02:39,299 --> 00:02:41,299 (dance music playing) 91 00:02:44,773 --> 00:02:45,545 Oh! 92 00:02:45,570 --> 00:02:46,609 Hey! 93 00:02:46,634 --> 00:02:48,500 Hi. Cool hat. 94 00:02:48,525 --> 00:02:49,891 Hats are the new tattoos. 95 00:02:49,893 --> 00:02:50,775 Oh, yeah, I read that. 96 00:02:50,777 --> 00:02:51,859 Let's go find Josh. 97 00:02:51,861 --> 00:02:53,117 Okay, well, you can find Josh 98 00:02:53,142 --> 00:02:54,593 and I'll be in there just checking out 99 00:02:54,618 --> 00:02:56,401 the local indigenous culture. Uh-huh. 100 00:02:56,426 --> 00:02:58,093 Well, while you're in there chatting 101 00:02:58,118 --> 00:02:59,751 about the majestic history of the 10 freeway, 102 00:02:59,776 --> 00:03:01,559 I'm gonna be asking Josh Chan 103 00:03:01,584 --> 00:03:03,300 why he's been dodging you. 104 00:03:04,576 --> 00:03:06,476 See, now, there it's possessive. 105 00:03:09,047 --> 00:03:10,147 PAULA: Yo... 106 00:03:10,149 --> 00:03:11,648 You see my hat? 107 00:03:11,650 --> 00:03:13,183 It's like a tattoo, 108 00:03:13,687 --> 00:03:15,402 but on my head. 109 00:03:15,968 --> 00:03:17,154 (whispers): Let us in. 110 00:03:17,335 --> 00:03:18,989 You on the list, Mrs. Butterworth? 111 00:03:18,991 --> 00:03:20,908 I don't care for that tone... 112 00:03:20,910 --> 00:03:22,776 - Or that reference. - Okay. Um, I... I... 113 00:03:22,778 --> 00:03:23,994 I got this. Sorry. 114 00:03:23,996 --> 00:03:25,896 Sorry, she doesn't know about club culture. 115 00:03:25,898 --> 00:03:28,492 Um... I should've done this earlier, 116 00:03:28,667 --> 00:03:31,368 it's more suave, but... let us in? 117 00:03:31,370 --> 00:03:33,120 Thank you. 118 00:03:33,648 --> 00:03:35,205 Yo, this is $500. 119 00:03:35,207 --> 00:03:36,907 Um... yeah. 120 00:03:36,909 --> 00:03:38,175 Yeah, it is. 121 00:03:38,648 --> 00:03:40,461 Look, if this had been a 20, you'd be good. 122 00:03:40,960 --> 00:03:43,047 But either you're a cop or you're a drug dealer. 123 00:03:43,455 --> 00:03:44,695 Either way, y'all ain't getting in. 124 00:03:46,468 --> 00:03:47,382 Okay. 125 00:03:47,970 --> 00:03:48,936 Okay... 126 00:03:48,938 --> 00:03:50,721 Okay. Yeah. 127 00:03:50,723 --> 00:03:52,089 No, not tonight. No. 128 00:03:52,091 --> 00:03:53,140 Oh, see... Hey, hey. 129 00:03:53,142 --> 00:03:54,358 Come on. Come on. Come on, come on. 130 00:03:54,360 --> 00:03:55,692 You gonna get runs in your stockings 131 00:03:55,694 --> 00:03:57,227 and all that stuff, man, you don't want that. 132 00:03:57,229 --> 00:03:58,145 Gotta keep moving. Come on. 133 00:03:58,147 --> 00:03:59,530 Okay. All right. 134 00:03:59,532 --> 00:04:00,481 I'm sorry, not tonight. 135 00:04:00,483 --> 00:04:01,698 Just... easy, easy, killer. 136 00:04:01,700 --> 00:04:03,934 All right. You know. 137 00:04:03,936 --> 00:04:05,903 All right. Well, if we're not getting in the club, 138 00:04:05,905 --> 00:04:06,987 do you want to... 139 00:04:06,989 --> 00:04:08,438 do you want to hang out, do something else? 140 00:04:08,440 --> 00:04:09,573 Ooh! 141 00:04:09,575 --> 00:04:11,075 There's a new Olive Garden in Arcadia. 142 00:04:11,077 --> 00:04:12,409 They're still figuring out their portions. 143 00:04:12,523 --> 00:04:13,460 Nah, I don't... 144 00:04:13,462 --> 00:04:14,912 I kind of want to just call it a night. 145 00:04:14,914 --> 00:04:16,713 No... oh, come on, man. 146 00:04:16,715 --> 00:04:17,831 I got a pass. 147 00:04:17,833 --> 00:04:19,166 I told Scott I was gonna be 148 00:04:19,168 --> 00:04:20,501 out all night having my period. 149 00:04:20,503 --> 00:04:22,419 He asked me no questions. 150 00:04:22,421 --> 00:04:23,720 (whines) 151 00:04:23,722 --> 00:04:25,089 I just, you know... 152 00:04:25,091 --> 00:04:26,423 coming from New York, 153 00:04:26,425 --> 00:04:28,382 a quiet night is a luxury. 154 00:04:28,811 --> 00:04:30,488 - Can we take a rain check? - All right. 155 00:04:31,218 --> 00:04:32,813 I like alone time. 156 00:04:32,861 --> 00:04:33,976 No... 157 00:04:34,968 --> 00:04:36,767 I love alone time. 158 00:04:36,769 --> 00:04:39,353 159 00:04:47,529 --> 00:04:50,906 And it was then the Fuhrer decided upon 160 00:04:51,197 --> 00:04:52,997 the Final Solution. 161 00:04:54,890 --> 00:04:56,153 What are you doing? 162 00:04:56,155 --> 00:04:58,422 163 00:05:13,146 --> 00:05:14,445 (exhales) 164 00:05:23,429 --> 00:05:27,017 MAN (over P.A.): Uh, Danny, could I get a price check on, uh, pork rinds? 165 00:05:27,471 --> 00:05:28,921 Price check on pork rinds. 166 00:05:31,357 --> 00:05:33,542 (fairy tale music playing) 167 00:05:35,026 --> 00:05:39,179 REBECCA: Josh-osh-osh-osh. 168 00:05:55,837 --> 00:05:57,179 Can I help you, ma'am? 169 00:05:58,566 --> 00:05:59,882 No, I'm fine. 170 00:06:00,609 --> 00:06:01,852 I'm just watching my ex-boyfriend 171 00:06:01,854 --> 00:06:03,770 make out with the hottest girl I've ever seen. 172 00:06:04,187 --> 00:06:05,989 Ah, she's okay. 173 00:06:06,867 --> 00:06:07,664 No... 174 00:06:07,937 --> 00:06:09,243 You know what? 175 00:06:09,506 --> 00:06:10,640 She's smoking. 176 00:06:11,148 --> 00:06:12,329 Oh, yeah, I see it now. 177 00:06:12,331 --> 00:06:14,679 She's got one of them secret booties. 178 00:06:15,710 --> 00:06:17,234 Oh, does he know you still dig him? 179 00:06:17,236 --> 00:06:18,609 He's just a friend! 180 00:06:19,436 --> 00:06:20,960 Sorry. It's a long story. 181 00:06:28,263 --> 00:06:29,346 Oh! Whoa, whoa! 182 00:06:29,348 --> 00:06:30,380 Whoa. Sor... 183 00:06:31,835 --> 00:06:32,802 (sighs) 184 00:06:33,570 --> 00:06:34,384 Hey. 185 00:06:35,265 --> 00:06:36,203 Wow. 186 00:06:37,531 --> 00:06:39,923 Um... so I-I texted you after the party, 187 00:06:39,925 --> 00:06:41,091 but I didn't hear back. 188 00:06:41,093 --> 00:06:42,359 Yeah, I'm sorry. 189 00:06:42,361 --> 00:06:44,027 I've been really busy with work. Seriously, though, 190 00:06:44,029 --> 00:06:45,398 now that I have you here, 191 00:06:45,614 --> 00:06:46,980 could we maybe have a postmortem 192 00:06:46,982 --> 00:06:48,315 on the whole makeout-crying session? 193 00:06:48,317 --> 00:06:50,367 I really don't think it's the time 194 00:06:50,369 --> 00:06:52,102 or the place. I... 195 00:06:52,492 --> 00:06:53,237 Wow. 196 00:06:53,239 --> 00:06:54,321 Dude, they got Twizzlers. 197 00:06:54,323 --> 00:06:55,812 - Throwback! - That's great. 198 00:06:56,539 --> 00:06:58,441 Um, Rebecca, 199 00:06:58,443 --> 00:07:00,494 let me introduce you to these two fine gentlemen. 200 00:07:00,496 --> 00:07:03,413 This is Hector, 203rd best surfer in the state. 201 00:07:03,929 --> 00:07:05,209 - 202nd. - GREG: Great. 202 00:07:05,234 --> 00:07:06,250 And this is White Josh, 203 00:07:06,252 --> 00:07:07,334 so named because he looks just like Josh, 204 00:07:07,336 --> 00:07:08,451 except for he's white. 205 00:07:08,453 --> 00:07:10,837 Also, my... my name is also Josh. 206 00:07:10,839 --> 00:07:12,139 Mmm. 207 00:07:12,601 --> 00:07:14,057 Well, we've all met. 208 00:07:14,059 --> 00:07:16,760 Um, hopefully the next time, I'll be... 209 00:07:16,762 --> 00:07:17,811 Better looking? 210 00:07:18,304 --> 00:07:19,563 - Thanks. - He doesn't mean that. 211 00:07:19,565 --> 00:07:21,014 Uh... it's fine. 212 00:07:21,016 --> 00:07:23,066 Um, I will text you at some point, 213 00:07:23,068 --> 00:07:24,968 I just... I-I really... I have to... 214 00:07:24,970 --> 00:07:26,987 - Okay. - Yeah. I have to go. 215 00:07:26,989 --> 00:07:28,822 Bras are in aisle one. 216 00:07:28,824 --> 00:07:30,524 (guys chuckling) 217 00:07:30,526 --> 00:07:31,858 That's really nice. 218 00:07:31,860 --> 00:07:33,143 It's, like, only $5.26. 219 00:07:33,145 --> 00:07:35,028 That's not that bad. 220 00:07:35,265 --> 00:07:36,997 Um, I think the ice cream is down here. 221 00:07:36,999 --> 00:07:38,148 What are you talking about, Joshy? 222 00:07:38,150 --> 00:07:39,199 It's right in front of you. 223 00:07:39,851 --> 00:07:41,335 Are you okay? 224 00:07:41,843 --> 00:07:44,421 Wait, why is Greg talking to a homeless? 225 00:07:45,843 --> 00:07:48,240 Oh, hi, Rebecca. 226 00:07:48,265 --> 00:07:49,793 Hey. 227 00:07:50,398 --> 00:07:51,685 You know each other? 228 00:07:52,484 --> 00:07:54,715 Yeah, uh, this is my friend Rebecca. 229 00:07:54,717 --> 00:07:55,849 We, um, 230 00:07:55,851 --> 00:07:58,302 met at summer camp, like, a million, billion, 231 00:07:58,304 --> 00:08:00,771 trillion, like, a zillion years ago. 232 00:08:00,773 --> 00:08:02,105 Summer camp? 233 00:08:02,107 --> 00:08:03,340 You guys met in summer camp? 234 00:08:03,342 --> 00:08:05,692 Yeah, we were like... like, eight years old. 235 00:08:05,694 --> 00:08:07,561 Right, Rebecca? 236 00:08:07,563 --> 00:08:08,734 No, we were... 237 00:08:10,460 --> 00:08:11,514 We were eight and a half. 238 00:08:11,968 --> 00:08:13,066 That was very important to me 239 00:08:13,068 --> 00:08:14,901 when I was eight. I'm eight and a half! 240 00:08:14,903 --> 00:08:15,929 You know. Kids. 241 00:08:16,859 --> 00:08:18,405 Uh, this is Valencia. 242 00:08:18,407 --> 00:08:19,740 My girlfriend. 243 00:08:20,234 --> 00:08:21,241 Hi. 244 00:08:21,243 --> 00:08:23,043 Nice to meet you. Oh. Hi. 245 00:08:27,531 --> 00:08:28,698 My lady. 246 00:08:29,210 --> 00:08:30,417 GREG: I'm confused. 247 00:08:30,419 --> 00:08:31,835 You don't know each other from New York? 248 00:08:31,837 --> 00:08:32,869 - No. - Nope. 249 00:08:33,523 --> 00:08:34,671 Wait. 250 00:08:34,673 --> 00:08:36,089 How do you guys know each other? 251 00:08:36,091 --> 00:08:37,507 (laughs) Oh, we, um, 252 00:08:37,509 --> 00:08:39,592 met at Home Base, um, 253 00:08:39,617 --> 00:08:42,162 and then we just became, like, cazh buds, 254 00:08:42,187 --> 00:08:44,834 and, yeah, that's-that's just, that's what happened. 255 00:08:44,859 --> 00:08:46,804 Valencia, that's such a beautiful name. 256 00:08:46,829 --> 00:08:48,023 What's the origin of that? 257 00:08:48,109 --> 00:08:49,459 Well, it used to be Maria, 258 00:08:49,461 --> 00:08:51,110 but I never felt like a Maria 259 00:08:51,112 --> 00:08:54,380 so I changed it to my mother's maiden name: �Valencia�" 260 00:08:54,382 --> 00:08:56,382 It's the Spanish word for �brave�" 261 00:08:56,384 --> 00:08:57,550 That's really cool. 262 00:08:57,552 --> 00:08:58,784 Actually, I thought about doing the same thing 263 00:08:58,786 --> 00:08:59,752 with my mother's maiden name. 264 00:08:59,754 --> 00:09:01,170 Um, it's �Garfinkel,� 265 00:09:01,172 --> 00:09:03,289 which is the Yiddish word for �diamond dealer.� 266 00:09:03,291 --> 00:09:04,624 Um... 267 00:09:04,626 --> 00:09:06,426 God, I love that dress. 268 00:09:06,428 --> 00:09:07,560 Can I just say, like, 269 00:09:07,562 --> 00:09:09,178 I cannot wear dresses like that, 270 00:09:09,180 --> 00:09:12,432 and you pull it off so, so well. 271 00:09:12,434 --> 00:09:15,468 I mean, you are... you're just so pretty. 272 00:09:15,470 --> 00:09:16,335 I mean, you have a great body. 273 00:09:16,360 --> 00:09:18,143 Well, I teach yoga. Keeps me fit. 274 00:09:18,168 --> 00:09:19,467 Oh, my God, I love yoga! 275 00:09:19,492 --> 00:09:21,158 That's so funny that we're meeting right now, 276 00:09:21,183 --> 00:09:22,266 'cause I love yoga. 277 00:09:22,601 --> 00:09:23,526 You do? 278 00:09:23,528 --> 00:09:24,611 Yeah, I-I love it. 279 00:09:24,613 --> 00:09:25,662 Well, maybe you should come 280 00:09:25,664 --> 00:09:26,663 to one of my classes. 281 00:09:26,665 --> 00:09:27,830 I would love that! 282 00:09:27,832 --> 00:09:29,699 - I would love to have you! - I would love to be had! 283 00:09:29,701 --> 00:09:31,167 (whispering): Why are their voices so high? 284 00:09:31,169 --> 00:09:32,335 REBECCA: Cool. 285 00:09:32,337 --> 00:09:34,504 Well, God, this has just been the best night. 286 00:09:34,506 --> 00:09:35,838 It was so great meeting you. 287 00:09:35,840 --> 00:09:39,959 I'm just going to gracefully exeunt, 288 00:09:39,961 --> 00:09:41,664 pursued by a bear. 289 00:09:43,609 --> 00:09:44,931 Uh, hey, I'll be right back. 290 00:09:44,933 --> 00:09:46,382 Can you get me two more pints? 291 00:09:46,384 --> 00:09:48,000 Oh, my God, she's so pretty, oh, my God, she's so pretty, 292 00:09:48,002 --> 00:09:50,503 oh, my God, she's so pretty, oh, my God, she's so pretty. 293 00:09:50,505 --> 00:09:51,771 Hi. 294 00:09:51,773 --> 00:09:52,972 Hey. 295 00:09:52,974 --> 00:09:54,307 What was up with that �eight years old� thing? 296 00:09:54,309 --> 00:09:55,841 We were 16 when we were at camp. 297 00:09:55,843 --> 00:09:57,026 No biggie. Just, uh... 298 00:09:57,028 --> 00:09:58,811 the thing with us at camp, no one knows that, 299 00:09:58,813 --> 00:10:00,179 especially Valencia, 300 00:10:00,181 --> 00:10:01,514 so let's just keep it on the DL. 301 00:10:01,516 --> 00:10:03,683 - Is this because I look like a homeless? - No, just, 302 00:10:03,685 --> 00:10:05,851 Valencia, she sometimes sweats these things. 303 00:10:05,853 --> 00:10:06,869 You get it. 304 00:10:06,871 --> 00:10:08,445 Wait... 305 00:10:08,470 --> 00:10:10,587 Is that the reason you haven't gotten back to me about dinner? 306 00:10:11,335 --> 00:10:12,909 Come on, dude. 307 00:10:12,911 --> 00:10:13,993 I'm no threat! 308 00:10:13,995 --> 00:10:14,994 Look at her! 309 00:10:14,996 --> 00:10:15,995 Look at me! 310 00:10:15,997 --> 00:10:18,030 Her! Me! 311 00:10:18,032 --> 00:10:19,365 Yoga! Homeless! 312 00:10:19,367 --> 00:10:21,584 And I... I have no problem with her. 313 00:10:21,586 --> 00:10:22,868 I think she's terrific. 314 00:10:22,870 --> 00:10:24,387 I mean, did you see how we... 315 00:10:24,389 --> 00:10:25,638 we instantly bonded? Actually, I... 316 00:10:25,640 --> 00:10:27,006 I would like to be friends with her. 317 00:10:27,008 --> 00:10:28,007 What? No. 318 00:10:28,009 --> 00:10:29,175 That's not a good idea. 319 00:10:29,177 --> 00:10:31,515 I don't think you guys should be friends or anything like that. 320 00:10:31,540 --> 00:10:32,898 Okay, okay. No, you're right, you're right. 321 00:10:32,923 --> 00:10:33,922 I am. 322 00:10:34,015 --> 00:10:35,231 Just chill, okay? 323 00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:37,150 Okay. 324 00:10:37,152 --> 00:10:38,484 Anyway, 325 00:10:38,486 --> 00:10:40,486 - I got to roll. Catch you later. - Oh, okay. 326 00:10:40,488 --> 00:10:42,405 I'll catch you... 327 00:10:42,407 --> 00:10:44,357 Hey, Val? I got your chin. 328 00:10:45,452 --> 00:10:46,711 I got your chin. 329 00:10:46,736 --> 00:10:48,452 What are you doing? 330 00:10:54,068 --> 00:10:55,625 _ 331 00:10:58,521 --> 00:11:00,656 _ 332 00:11:03,794 --> 00:11:06,045 (computer chimes) 333 00:11:06,069 --> 00:11:08,317 _ 334 00:11:08,342 --> 00:11:10,543 (chuckles) 335 00:11:20,125 --> 00:11:22,748 Josh's girlfriend is so nice. 336 00:11:22,773 --> 00:11:24,495 Like, so nice. 337 00:11:24,497 --> 00:11:26,047 Like, stop being this nice. 338 00:11:26,049 --> 00:11:27,742 You are so pretty. 339 00:11:27,767 --> 00:11:29,787 So, I got provisions for us 340 00:11:29,812 --> 00:11:31,446 for while we work on this arbitration, 341 00:11:31,471 --> 00:11:33,007 because it is going to be... 342 00:11:33,032 --> 00:11:35,282 (laughs): a long day. 343 00:11:35,942 --> 00:11:37,141 First... 344 00:11:37,554 --> 00:11:39,443 Mama got you the strawberry donuts 345 00:11:39,445 --> 00:11:41,395 that you like from the place around the corner. 346 00:11:41,397 --> 00:11:43,882 (squeals) And... 347 00:11:44,234 --> 00:11:46,200 look at what I found at the car wash. 348 00:11:46,202 --> 00:11:47,568 Sh-bam! 349 00:11:47,812 --> 00:11:49,742 It's a Statue of Liberty key chain. 350 00:11:50,445 --> 00:11:51,956 'Cause you're from New York. 351 00:11:52,523 --> 00:11:53,574 Do you get it? 352 00:11:54,093 --> 00:11:55,248 Do you, do you like it? 353 00:11:55,367 --> 00:11:56,360 Yeah, no... (stammers) 354 00:11:56,362 --> 00:11:58,045 I'm sorry, I love it, yeah! 355 00:11:58,047 --> 00:11:59,547 Oh, that's so sweet. 356 00:11:59,549 --> 00:12:01,082 I don't have anything for you. 357 00:12:01,084 --> 00:12:02,466 Put it on your keys! 358 00:12:02,882 --> 00:12:04,001 Okay, yeah. 359 00:12:04,003 --> 00:12:05,252 No, I mean, like, right now! 360 00:12:05,531 --> 00:12:07,004 'Cause I want to, I want to watch it happen! 361 00:12:07,310 --> 00:12:08,609 Oh, okay. 362 00:12:10,592 --> 00:12:11,842 Ah, I'm sorry. 363 00:12:12,398 --> 00:12:13,594 I'm sorry, I always wanted a daughter. 364 00:12:13,596 --> 00:12:16,631 I didn't, my-my kids are not daughters. 365 00:12:16,656 --> 00:12:18,038 They're terrible. 366 00:12:18,063 --> 00:12:19,712 I'll-I'll tell you about it later. 367 00:12:19,714 --> 00:12:20,539 Or now. 368 00:12:20,564 --> 00:12:21,875 So, Valencia's interests 369 00:12:21,900 --> 00:12:23,232 include tempeh patties, 370 00:12:23,234 --> 00:12:24,906 and Vampire Weekend. 371 00:12:25,796 --> 00:12:28,007 I just feel like we have so much in common. 372 00:12:28,189 --> 00:12:29,889 What's Vampire Weekend? 373 00:12:29,930 --> 00:12:32,132 Um, it's a weekend away with vampires. 374 00:12:32,336 --> 00:12:34,419 (chuckles) I'm pretty sure it's not that. 375 00:12:34,444 --> 00:12:35,927 No, I-I read about it in The New Yorker. 376 00:12:36,064 --> 00:12:37,163 It's very popular. 377 00:12:37,165 --> 00:12:38,865 Let me see her picture. Let me see her face. 378 00:12:38,867 --> 00:12:40,199 Here, take a look, see? 379 00:12:40,201 --> 00:12:42,335 PAULA: Whoa-ho-ho! 380 00:12:42,337 --> 00:12:44,954 She is smoking! 381 00:12:44,956 --> 00:12:46,673 So pretty, right? 382 00:12:46,675 --> 00:12:48,507 And Josh says I can't be friends with her, 383 00:12:48,532 --> 00:12:49,718 but I really like her. 384 00:12:49,743 --> 00:12:51,910 (laughs) Come on. 385 00:12:53,679 --> 00:12:55,348 You loathe her. 386 00:12:55,350 --> 00:12:57,210 Um, no, I don't. 387 00:12:57,235 --> 00:12:58,451 Oh, okay! 388 00:12:58,770 --> 00:13:00,353 Let me tell you how this works. 389 00:13:00,355 --> 00:13:03,473 Women of equal sexual viability hate each other. 390 00:13:03,475 --> 00:13:07,259 Even if they pretend to like each other. 391 00:13:07,261 --> 00:13:08,811 And that is how it has worked 392 00:13:08,813 --> 00:13:11,243 since the day vagina�s were invented. 393 00:13:11,483 --> 00:13:12,448 See, okay, look. 394 00:13:13,156 --> 00:13:14,484 You're like these two, all right? 395 00:13:14,509 --> 00:13:16,408 You're Taylor Swift and she's Katy Perry. 396 00:13:16,433 --> 00:13:18,233 Oh, wait a minute... Maybe you're Katy Perry. 397 00:13:18,258 --> 00:13:20,225 No! No, you're Taylor Swift. 398 00:13:20,250 --> 00:13:21,328 You're uptight and weird, right? 399 00:13:21,360 --> 00:13:23,560 Okay, this is why I don't read this drivel, right? 400 00:13:23,828 --> 00:13:25,945 Because it perpetuates the very misogynist myth 401 00:13:25,947 --> 00:13:28,081 that women can't get along, right? 402 00:13:28,083 --> 00:13:29,799 Look at this cover! 403 00:13:29,801 --> 00:13:31,584 �Femme feud, girl fight. 404 00:13:31,586 --> 00:13:32,785 Who wore it better?� 405 00:13:32,787 --> 00:13:34,179 It's like, �Who wore it equally?� 406 00:13:34,204 --> 00:13:35,117 God, you're boring. 407 00:13:35,142 --> 00:13:36,391 Look, I get what you're doing 408 00:13:36,416 --> 00:13:38,583 with this girl and I totally approve! 409 00:13:38,740 --> 00:13:41,574 You befriend the enemy and you get more face time with Josh. 410 00:13:41,679 --> 00:13:43,312 If you really neutralize her, 411 00:13:43,314 --> 00:13:45,264 maybe she'll give you some solo time with him, so... 412 00:13:45,266 --> 00:13:46,432 No, no, mm-mm, no. 413 00:13:46,434 --> 00:13:47,567 That's not what I'm doing. 414 00:13:47,569 --> 00:13:48,684 That's not what I'm doing at all. 415 00:13:48,686 --> 00:13:50,695 I know, that is not what you're doing 416 00:13:50,720 --> 00:13:52,720 at all... wink. 417 00:13:52,824 --> 00:13:55,274 No, I... (chuckles) I really want to be her friend. 418 00:13:55,276 --> 00:13:56,776 Like, genuinely want to be her friend. 419 00:13:56,778 --> 00:13:58,485 - Wink. - Stop winking! 420 00:13:58,509 --> 00:13:59,429 (giggles) 421 00:13:59,781 --> 00:14:03,350 Ooh. Oh, she's teaching a yoga class today at 3:00. 422 00:14:03,375 --> 00:14:04,584 Oh, that's, like, now! 423 00:14:04,586 --> 00:14:05,618 Change of plans. 424 00:14:05,620 --> 00:14:06,368 Eat the donut for me. 425 00:14:06,392 --> 00:14:08,598 I'm gonna go. While I'm gone, 426 00:14:08,623 --> 00:14:10,877 pull up the Mendez file, and see what previous motions 427 00:14:10,902 --> 00:14:12,843 the plaintiff has put before the judge, okay? 428 00:14:12,868 --> 00:14:14,001 Yeah... I love this! 429 00:14:14,085 --> 00:14:15,890 Gonna use it on my car right now. 430 00:14:15,915 --> 00:14:16,914 Okay... 431 00:14:17,234 --> 00:14:18,507 Go get her! 432 00:14:21,774 --> 00:14:23,000 I'll be right here. 433 00:14:29,203 --> 00:14:31,289 And just breathe. 434 00:14:32,476 --> 00:14:33,929 Good. 435 00:14:33,954 --> 00:14:36,488 Everyone, thank you for joining me today 436 00:14:36,513 --> 00:14:39,062 in a journey of self-discovery and reflection. 437 00:14:40,289 --> 00:14:42,321 Oh, you came. 438 00:14:42,323 --> 00:14:43,273 How nice. 439 00:14:43,298 --> 00:14:45,158 Everyone, we have some new faces today. 440 00:14:45,367 --> 00:14:46,726 Welcome. Namaste. 441 00:14:46,758 --> 00:14:47,957 Namaste. 442 00:14:48,476 --> 00:14:49,906 Can I get an �ohm�? 443 00:14:49,931 --> 00:14:50,930 (laughs) 444 00:14:51,539 --> 00:14:52,732 Okay. 445 00:14:52,734 --> 00:14:55,201 So, let's start in a gentle stretch. 446 00:14:55,203 --> 00:14:57,136 Breathe in. (deep inhale) 447 00:14:57,138 --> 00:14:58,546 And out. (exhales) 448 00:14:59,932 --> 00:15:02,749 Good, now let's move into our first Vinyasa flow. 449 00:15:03,242 --> 00:15:04,875 And breathe in. 450 00:15:05,448 --> 00:15:07,265 And exhale on an ah... 451 00:15:08,988 --> 00:15:10,654 Ah! 452 00:15:10,679 --> 00:15:12,378 ALL: Ah... 453 00:15:12,553 --> 00:15:15,905 (mystical music playing) 454 00:15:15,907 --> 00:15:19,192 We are in a yoga class 455 00:15:19,194 --> 00:15:23,953 Now is the time to let your mind go blank 456 00:15:23,978 --> 00:15:26,912 And focus instead on how awesome 457 00:15:26,937 --> 00:15:31,056 The yoga teacher is 458 00:15:37,653 --> 00:15:40,939 Look at me, look at me 459 00:15:40,964 --> 00:15:43,181 I'm so good at yoga 460 00:15:43,301 --> 00:15:45,051 Look at me, look at me 461 00:15:45,053 --> 00:15:48,137 I'm so good at yoga 462 00:15:48,139 --> 00:15:50,256 Exhale on another sigh 463 00:15:50,258 --> 00:15:52,942 Rebecca sucks 464 00:15:54,928 --> 00:15:56,529 I do stuff with my body 465 00:15:56,531 --> 00:15:59,148 That no human should be able to do 466 00:15:59,150 --> 00:16:01,367 Like putting my face behind my knees 467 00:16:01,369 --> 00:16:03,736 Turning my hand into a shoe 468 00:16:03,738 --> 00:16:05,705 As the morning sun kisses a lotus 469 00:16:05,707 --> 00:16:08,274 I kiss my own hoo-ha... Can you do that? 470 00:16:08,276 --> 00:16:10,459 Great each day �Namaste� 471 00:16:10,484 --> 00:16:12,138 Screw... you 472 00:16:12,163 --> 00:16:14,297 You're fat 473 00:16:14,299 --> 00:16:16,165 Look at me, look at me 474 00:16:16,167 --> 00:16:18,834 I'm so good at yoga 475 00:16:18,836 --> 00:16:20,636 Look at me, look at me 476 00:16:20,638 --> 00:16:23,222 I'm so good at yoga 477 00:16:23,224 --> 00:16:25,925 Look at her, look at her 478 00:16:28,011 --> 00:16:30,062 Look at her, look at her 479 00:16:30,064 --> 00:16:32,431 I'm so much better than you 480 00:16:34,710 --> 00:16:36,485 If you want to just stay in child's pose, 481 00:16:36,487 --> 00:16:37,445 it's totally fine. 482 00:16:37,470 --> 00:16:38,915 Nope, I'm an adult! 483 00:16:38,940 --> 00:16:40,856 I'm not afraid to get tattoos 484 00:16:40,858 --> 00:16:44,076 - And they are all in Sanskrit - Panther 485 00:16:44,078 --> 00:16:46,195 Butt stuff doesn't hurt at all 486 00:16:46,197 --> 00:16:48,247 Most times I prefer it 487 00:16:48,249 --> 00:16:49,665 That's what this tattoo says 488 00:16:49,667 --> 00:16:51,701 Look at her, look at her 489 00:16:51,703 --> 00:16:55,371 - I'm so good at yoga - Look at her, look at her 490 00:16:55,373 --> 00:16:58,541 I orgasm instantly 491 00:16:58,543 --> 00:17:00,760 Look at her, look at her 492 00:17:00,762 --> 00:17:03,022 I'm not afraid of clowns and trains 493 00:17:03,047 --> 00:17:05,348 - Come on! - Look at her, look at her 494 00:17:05,350 --> 00:17:08,017 My father didn't leave me 495 00:17:08,019 --> 00:17:10,102 Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah 496 00:17:10,104 --> 00:17:12,521 - N-N-N-N-N-Nyah - Boom! 497 00:17:12,523 --> 00:17:14,673 Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah 498 00:17:14,675 --> 00:17:18,027 I'm so good at yoga 499 00:17:18,029 --> 00:17:20,813 Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah 500 00:17:20,815 --> 00:17:22,331 - N-N-N-N-N-Nyah - Boom! 501 00:17:25,533 --> 00:17:26,580 REBECCA: Wow! 502 00:17:26,605 --> 00:17:29,222 Um, that was, like, amazing. 503 00:17:29,407 --> 00:17:31,540 Yeah, you are really sweating. 504 00:17:31,542 --> 00:17:33,576 I think you really cleared out some toxins. 505 00:17:33,578 --> 00:17:36,746 I can see those heavy metals just pouring out of you. 506 00:17:36,748 --> 00:17:37,840 Heavy metals, yeah. 507 00:17:38,096 --> 00:17:39,832 Well, I do eat a lot of auto parts. 508 00:17:39,834 --> 00:17:40,697 Huh? 509 00:17:40,722 --> 00:17:41,791 Nothing, it's stupid. 510 00:17:41,816 --> 00:17:42,877 I'm stupid. 511 00:17:42,902 --> 00:17:45,182 Hey, do you want to go grab, like, a coffee with me 512 00:17:45,306 --> 00:17:46,672 or something? 513 00:17:46,674 --> 00:17:48,374 I only drink water. 514 00:17:48,376 --> 00:17:49,809 And I got to go do some cardio. 515 00:17:49,811 --> 00:17:52,044 It's hard to break a sweat doing beginner's yoga. 516 00:17:52,046 --> 00:17:54,252 Of... yeah, yeah, yeah. 517 00:17:54,277 --> 00:17:55,721 So, maybe another time. 518 00:17:55,861 --> 00:17:57,021 Well, no worries. 519 00:17:57,046 --> 00:17:58,245 'Cause I'm just gonna keep coming back. 520 00:17:58,270 --> 00:17:59,769 Um, I bought a 20-pack on my way in, 521 00:17:59,794 --> 00:18:00,963 so I'm kind of your sugar mama 522 00:18:00,988 --> 00:18:02,137 if you know what I'm saying. 523 00:18:02,162 --> 00:18:03,713 (laughs) Yeah, I wish. 524 00:18:03,738 --> 00:18:05,416 I only get to keep 50% of each class. 525 00:18:05,441 --> 00:18:07,775 But until I own my own studio, I can't complain. 526 00:18:07,996 --> 00:18:09,945 Well, your own studio. I mean, that's, 527 00:18:09,947 --> 00:18:11,447 that's a great idea. Have you looked into stuff yet? 528 00:18:11,449 --> 00:18:13,082 Because I-I'm actually, I'm a lawyer 529 00:18:13,084 --> 00:18:14,750 and real estate is my specialty. 530 00:18:14,752 --> 00:18:16,369 And I could help you find a cheap place, 531 00:18:16,371 --> 00:18:17,753 get a good deal on a lease. 532 00:18:17,755 --> 00:18:18,924 Why would you want to do that? 533 00:18:19,908 --> 00:18:22,458 Well, that's why I moved here... To support a local community. 534 00:18:22,460 --> 00:18:25,361 And building small businesses is an essential part of that. 535 00:18:25,421 --> 00:18:28,106 Wow, did you, like, go to Harvard or something? 536 00:18:28,455 --> 00:18:31,217 Um, yeah, but I don't like to talk about it, 537 00:18:31,219 --> 00:18:32,685 'cause people get weird. 538 00:18:32,687 --> 00:18:34,053 Your shirt says Harvard. 539 00:18:34,744 --> 00:18:36,555 That way I don't have to talk about it. 540 00:18:36,557 --> 00:18:39,174 Hmm, wow. That's... impressive. 541 00:18:39,527 --> 00:18:41,060 Hey! Oh, mmm! 542 00:18:41,062 --> 00:18:42,445 This just popped into my nogs. 543 00:18:42,447 --> 00:18:44,146 Why don't we get lunch sometime this week, 544 00:18:44,148 --> 00:18:47,199 and I'll just, I'll go over all the deets about leases 545 00:18:47,201 --> 00:18:49,285 and how it works. 546 00:18:49,287 --> 00:18:51,072 And I can buy you a really nice water. 547 00:18:51,963 --> 00:18:52,900 Okay. 548 00:18:53,408 --> 00:18:54,518 I like boxed water. 549 00:18:55,641 --> 00:18:57,088 Great. 550 00:18:59,650 --> 00:19:01,080 PAULA: So... 551 00:19:01,369 --> 00:19:04,133 have a nice lunch with Valerio. 552 00:19:04,549 --> 00:19:05,634 Who knows, maybe next time, 553 00:19:05,636 --> 00:19:07,619 you'll actually have lunch with Josh. 554 00:19:07,621 --> 00:19:09,638 Uh, okay, again, this is not because of Josh. 555 00:19:09,640 --> 00:19:11,891 (phone chimes) 556 00:19:12,009 --> 00:19:13,142 Who's that? 557 00:19:13,698 --> 00:19:14,924 Josh! 558 00:19:23,635 --> 00:19:24,924 JOSH: Hey! 559 00:19:24,949 --> 00:19:26,041 Hi! 560 00:19:26,066 --> 00:19:27,033 Sorry. 561 00:19:27,058 --> 00:19:28,791 Hi, um, so you wanted to see me? 562 00:19:28,816 --> 00:19:30,949 Oh, before we go talk, do you want some boba? 563 00:19:30,974 --> 00:19:32,174 It actually horrifies me personally. 564 00:19:32,199 --> 00:19:33,510 It's like drinking little tumors. 565 00:19:33,535 --> 00:19:35,354 But if you want some, like, knock yourself out. 566 00:19:35,377 --> 00:19:36,577 No, I'm good, I'm good. 567 00:19:36,579 --> 00:19:38,245 So, listen, uh, I've been scratching my head 568 00:19:38,247 --> 00:19:40,869 a little bit here, 'cause I heard 569 00:19:41,150 --> 00:19:44,218 you were having lunch with Valencia? 570 00:19:44,220 --> 00:19:46,920 And I thought you were gonna keep a little distance? 571 00:19:47,510 --> 00:19:49,360 Yeah, um, the friendship thing. 572 00:19:49,385 --> 00:19:51,062 I know that we talked about that. 573 00:19:51,064 --> 00:19:54,265 But it just kind of, it happened organically. 574 00:19:54,267 --> 00:19:54,947 You know? 575 00:19:54,972 --> 00:19:56,088 I won't say a word about camp. 576 00:19:56,113 --> 00:19:57,496 Oh, my God, like, 577 00:19:57,521 --> 00:19:59,637 I don't even factor that whole thing into our friendship. 578 00:19:59,662 --> 00:20:02,096 I honestly, I barely remember it. 579 00:20:02,121 --> 00:20:04,438 I mean, I've had many sexual partners since. 580 00:20:04,463 --> 00:20:05,646 Clean as a whistle, though. 581 00:20:05,671 --> 00:20:07,003 I don't know. 582 00:20:07,028 --> 00:20:08,594 Uh, uh, she can get mad. 583 00:20:08,731 --> 00:20:09,877 She can, you know, 584 00:20:09,918 --> 00:20:12,182 get really mad. 585 00:20:12,207 --> 00:20:13,932 But what's there to be mad about? 586 00:20:13,957 --> 00:20:16,074 Because if we're just gonna be buds, that's all. 587 00:20:16,239 --> 00:20:18,423 And the great thing is, if we're friends, 588 00:20:18,425 --> 00:20:21,092 then we can all hang out and it won't be awkward. 589 00:20:21,094 --> 00:20:23,025 Right? We could have lunches 590 00:20:23,050 --> 00:20:24,916 and dinners and go to Spiders. 591 00:20:25,248 --> 00:20:27,432 Find out if it's possessive or plural. 592 00:20:27,512 --> 00:20:28,432 (laughs) Right? 593 00:20:32,064 --> 00:20:33,788 Thank you for letting me order off the children's menu. 594 00:20:33,790 --> 00:20:35,518 You're so nice. 595 00:20:36,791 --> 00:20:38,533 This looks so good. 596 00:20:38,558 --> 00:20:39,925 So I really think we're gonna 597 00:20:39,950 --> 00:20:41,165 get the property on East Cameron. 598 00:20:41,333 --> 00:20:42,499 You think so? 599 00:20:42,571 --> 00:20:44,054 It would be so perfect. 600 00:20:44,079 --> 00:20:45,929 The square footage is exactly what I need. 601 00:20:45,954 --> 00:20:47,487 But it was so expensive. 602 00:20:47,512 --> 00:20:49,362 And you low-balled the guy. 603 00:20:49,387 --> 00:20:51,220 No, no. By the end of lunch, 604 00:20:51,245 --> 00:20:52,479 that guy's gonna call and cave. 605 00:20:52,504 --> 00:20:53,432 So, um, 606 00:20:53,457 --> 00:20:55,373 go back to what you were saying about your diet, 607 00:20:55,398 --> 00:20:57,486 - 'cause it was, it was fascinating. - Oh, yeah. 608 00:20:57,511 --> 00:21:00,595 So, I sent my wellness coach a drop of my blood, 609 00:21:00,620 --> 00:21:03,037 and she told me which foods go best with my blood type. 610 00:21:03,098 --> 00:21:05,015 So it's lots and lots of greens 611 00:21:05,040 --> 00:21:07,361 and lean proteins and no legumes. 612 00:21:07,553 --> 00:21:09,554 REBECCA: No legumes, no starches. 613 00:21:09,579 --> 00:21:11,246 God, she's so skinny. 614 00:21:11,271 --> 00:21:13,304 No wonder Josh loves her. 615 00:21:13,463 --> 00:21:15,146 You know, I-I sent a drop of blood 616 00:21:15,148 --> 00:21:16,283 to a wellness coach one time, 617 00:21:16,308 --> 00:21:18,533 and they said that my blood type works best with Panda Express. 618 00:21:19,444 --> 00:21:21,944 - Really? - No. No, it doesn't. 619 00:21:21,969 --> 00:21:23,102 Oh, you were making a joke. 620 00:21:23,127 --> 00:21:24,543 - Yeah, yeah. - Oh. 621 00:21:24,568 --> 00:21:26,111 Yeah, I think you did that once before. 622 00:21:26,136 --> 00:21:27,936 Sorry, I don't like humor. 623 00:21:28,533 --> 00:21:29,410 Okay. 624 00:21:29,736 --> 00:21:31,746 Um, I've been meaning to ask you. 625 00:21:32,002 --> 00:21:33,698 What kind of face moisturizer do you use? 626 00:21:33,700 --> 00:21:35,932 'Cause my face has been dry for, like, 20 years. 627 00:21:35,957 --> 00:21:37,705 Unrefined coconut oil. 628 00:21:37,837 --> 00:21:39,197 - Really? - Yeah, mm-hmm. 629 00:21:39,222 --> 00:21:41,522 So, anyway, something else my wellness coach said was... 630 00:21:41,547 --> 00:21:43,697 Actually don't do the oil pulling for 20 minutes... 631 00:21:44,299 --> 00:21:45,893 REBECCA: Coconut oil. 632 00:21:46,293 --> 00:21:48,744 Long necklace nestled in cleavage. 633 00:21:49,382 --> 00:21:51,883 Silky romper... how do you pee in that thing? 634 00:21:51,885 --> 00:21:53,518 (cell phone chimes) Hold on. 635 00:21:53,520 --> 00:21:55,111 Hold that very important thought. 636 00:21:58,307 --> 00:21:59,736 We got your yoga studio. 637 00:21:59,761 --> 00:22:00,869 We did? Yeah. 638 00:22:00,894 --> 00:22:02,643 Oh, my God, you're amazing. 639 00:22:02,668 --> 00:22:03,751 Oh. Oh, my God. 640 00:22:03,776 --> 00:22:05,726 Hey, you're amazing. 641 00:22:06,149 --> 00:22:08,080 - You smell like roasted corn. - Huh? 642 00:22:08,105 --> 00:22:10,155 I said you smell like roasted corn. 643 00:22:10,180 --> 00:22:11,579 Oh, thanks. 644 00:22:11,674 --> 00:22:13,224 God, I can't believe you did it. 645 00:22:13,249 --> 00:22:14,582 Well, I went to Harvard. 646 00:22:14,718 --> 00:22:16,064 I don't mess around. 647 00:22:16,089 --> 00:22:18,723 Do all people who go to Harvard say it as much as you do? 648 00:22:18,748 --> 00:22:19,689 Yeah. 649 00:22:27,861 --> 00:22:29,971 You've checked your phone, like, 80 times. 650 00:22:29,973 --> 00:22:31,222 Why are you so worried 651 00:22:31,224 --> 00:22:32,674 about Valencia having lunch with Rebecca? 652 00:22:32,875 --> 00:22:35,666 Don't know, it just... feels weird. 653 00:22:35,691 --> 00:22:37,891 Why? Did you and Rebecca hook up or something? 654 00:22:38,199 --> 00:22:40,866 (scoffing): Um, no, bro, I was eight years old. 655 00:22:41,048 --> 00:22:42,681 Even I am not that big of a stud. 656 00:22:42,706 --> 00:22:44,666 Hmm. Wait, why? 657 00:22:47,150 --> 00:22:48,773 Are you into Rebecca? 658 00:22:48,775 --> 00:22:49,354 Well... 659 00:22:49,379 --> 00:22:50,328 Is that why you're asking me? 660 00:22:50,472 --> 00:22:53,356 Uh, I'm not... not interested. 661 00:22:53,421 --> 00:22:54,420 Whoa. 662 00:22:54,445 --> 00:22:56,611 Wow, Serrano, coming from you, 663 00:22:56,636 --> 00:22:58,886 that is like... a declaration of love. 664 00:22:58,911 --> 00:22:59,910 (scoffs) 665 00:22:59,935 --> 00:23:01,584 Dude, if you want her, go for it. 666 00:23:02,330 --> 00:23:04,025 Maybe I will. (grunts) 667 00:23:04,050 --> 00:23:07,084 Maybe I will throw my saddle 668 00:23:07,265 --> 00:23:08,848 - on that filly. - Yeah. 669 00:23:08,873 --> 00:23:10,956 Take her for a ride around the paddock. 670 00:23:10,981 --> 00:23:12,097 Yeah. 671 00:23:12,122 --> 00:23:13,088 Oh, yeah, you're gonna ride that filly. 672 00:23:13,113 --> 00:23:14,666 - (neighs) - (neighs) 673 00:23:14,691 --> 00:23:15,830 (grunts) 674 00:23:17,627 --> 00:23:19,053 Men are disgusting. 675 00:23:19,486 --> 00:23:20,752 Yeah. 676 00:23:21,160 --> 00:23:23,827 Hey, don't worry about Valencia and Rebecca. 677 00:23:23,852 --> 00:23:25,552 They are not gonna become friends. 678 00:23:25,955 --> 00:23:28,213 You know how Valencia is with other women. 679 00:23:28,238 --> 00:23:29,887 Come on, she's not a bonder. 680 00:23:29,950 --> 00:23:30,971 She can't bond. 681 00:23:30,996 --> 00:23:32,496 (both laughing) 682 00:23:32,846 --> 00:23:35,096 I love you. 683 00:23:35,121 --> 00:23:37,204 No, I love you. 684 00:23:37,206 --> 00:23:38,873 (laughs) 685 00:23:38,875 --> 00:23:41,042 (chuckles) 686 00:23:45,477 --> 00:23:47,025 Hey, what's-what's wrong? 687 00:23:49,502 --> 00:23:51,169 Uh, it's just, you wouldn't get this about me 688 00:23:51,194 --> 00:23:52,994 because of my wide student fan base, 689 00:23:53,026 --> 00:23:56,110 but I actually don't have a lot of girlfriends. 690 00:23:56,135 --> 00:23:57,072 Huh. 691 00:23:57,097 --> 00:23:59,111 The last time I had a solid crew was in high school, 692 00:23:59,136 --> 00:24:01,057 but then they all got jealous 693 00:24:01,082 --> 00:24:02,581 because I got these amazing boobs 694 00:24:02,606 --> 00:24:03,856 and they were still trolls, 695 00:24:03,881 --> 00:24:06,197 and so they spread all these rumors that I, like, 696 00:24:06,255 --> 00:24:07,421 slept with the English teacher. 697 00:24:07,516 --> 00:24:08,616 No. I know. 698 00:24:08,641 --> 00:24:09,791 Which is a total lie, 699 00:24:09,816 --> 00:24:11,299 because we only did hand stuff. 700 00:24:11,474 --> 00:24:12,806 And then everyone turned on me, 701 00:24:12,808 --> 00:24:14,283 and since then, I just... 702 00:24:15,091 --> 00:24:17,208 I don't get along that well with other girls. 703 00:24:17,233 --> 00:24:18,849 Oh, my God, I'm the exact same way. 704 00:24:19,307 --> 00:24:20,775 Yeah? I mean, except for the English teacher part. 705 00:24:20,800 --> 00:24:22,518 - That's-that's really cool. - Thanks. 706 00:24:22,992 --> 00:24:25,025 Although, um, it-it's really cool, 707 00:24:25,050 --> 00:24:27,050 but, like, you know, you should have reported that. 708 00:24:27,075 --> 00:24:28,875 Did you report it to the appropriate authorities? 709 00:24:28,940 --> 00:24:31,474 Nah, it's just hand stuff... It's not a big deal. 710 00:24:31,499 --> 00:24:34,834 Well, I mean, depending on what age you were, 711 00:24:34,859 --> 00:24:37,309 it's technically a little bit of statutory rape. 712 00:24:37,334 --> 00:24:38,683 Eh... But, you know. 713 00:24:38,736 --> 00:24:40,834 I'll allow it. 714 00:24:40,836 --> 00:24:42,520 But seriously, a judge would not have allowed it. 715 00:24:42,522 --> 00:24:43,521 He should be in jail. 716 00:24:43,523 --> 00:24:44,635 Do you know if he went to jail? 717 00:24:44,660 --> 00:24:45,588 Did he do it to other kids? 718 00:24:45,613 --> 00:24:48,369 Oh, my God, you're amazing, you're so nice. 719 00:24:49,018 --> 00:24:51,445 I thought you just only wanted to do real estate stuff with me, 720 00:24:52,268 --> 00:24:53,494 but we're friends. 721 00:24:54,200 --> 00:24:55,229 We're friends, right? 722 00:24:55,254 --> 00:24:57,799 Yeah. Yeah, we're... we're fr... 723 00:24:58,096 --> 00:24:59,262 Yeah, we're friends... 724 00:24:59,405 --> 00:25:00,871 Yeah, we're friends. 725 00:25:00,873 --> 00:25:02,400 Yeah, 'cause, I mean, like, 726 00:25:02,425 --> 00:25:04,759 what other agenda could I possibly have? 727 00:25:05,140 --> 00:25:06,923 (both laugh) 728 00:25:06,948 --> 00:25:08,869 That is such a weird thing to say. 729 00:25:08,894 --> 00:25:09,893 (laughing): I know! 730 00:25:09,918 --> 00:25:11,250 Aah! Yeah. 731 00:25:11,275 --> 00:25:13,476 (both laugh, sigh) 732 00:25:17,475 --> 00:25:19,092 Mmm, your tushy's warm. 733 00:25:19,117 --> 00:25:20,667 Thanks. 734 00:25:23,494 --> 00:25:25,028 REBECCA (sighs happily): Yeah. 735 00:25:25,053 --> 00:25:27,721 Valencia and I are basically the same person. 736 00:25:28,580 --> 00:25:30,627 Oh, she's like me, except for... 737 00:25:30,971 --> 00:25:32,876 I don't know what she is... Guatemalan? 738 00:25:32,901 --> 00:25:34,369 I don't know, don't quote me on that. 739 00:25:34,394 --> 00:25:37,428 Anyway, between us, it's like we're Siamese souls. 740 00:25:37,639 --> 00:25:40,088 Excuse me, just one second. 741 00:25:40,534 --> 00:25:42,338 (imitates vomiting) 742 00:25:44,144 --> 00:25:47,146 Now, uh, in case you missed it, that was me vomiting. 743 00:25:47,148 --> 00:25:48,666 No, I got it. 744 00:25:49,751 --> 00:25:50,983 What's wrong with you? 745 00:25:50,985 --> 00:25:53,620 'Cause, like, I've made a really cool friend. 746 00:25:53,622 --> 00:25:55,538 She's, like, pretty and nice, 747 00:25:55,540 --> 00:25:57,540 and she knows about, like, a lot of cool things, 748 00:25:57,542 --> 00:26:00,627 like coconut oil and movies and Vampire Weekends. 749 00:26:00,629 --> 00:26:01,994 Like, what's your deal? 750 00:26:01,996 --> 00:26:05,548 We had a plan... uh, neutralize the enemy, not snuggle it. 751 00:26:05,550 --> 00:26:06,850 No, we didn't have a plan. 752 00:26:06,852 --> 00:26:09,102 You had a plan, I'm making a friend. 753 00:26:09,104 --> 00:26:10,386 - What?! - Wow. 754 00:26:10,388 --> 00:26:11,521 Are you jealous? 755 00:26:11,523 --> 00:26:14,190 (scoffs) I am not jealous. 756 00:26:14,192 --> 00:26:17,227 I'm not saying this for me, I'm saying this for you, 757 00:26:17,229 --> 00:26:19,896 you munchkin dumb-ass. 758 00:26:19,898 --> 00:26:20,947 This is unhealthy. 759 00:26:20,949 --> 00:26:22,532 Okay, all right. 760 00:26:22,534 --> 00:26:24,567 You need to take some Motrin or something. 761 00:26:24,569 --> 00:26:26,903 Oh, you know, I have never met anyone in my life 762 00:26:26,905 --> 00:26:28,538 who lies to themselves as much as you do. 763 00:26:28,540 --> 00:26:29,873 You lie about why you came here, 764 00:26:29,875 --> 00:26:31,241 You lie about how you feel about Josh. 765 00:26:31,243 --> 00:26:33,693 You lie about why you want to become friends with Valencia. 766 00:26:33,695 --> 00:26:35,995 Okay, okay, that's enough! God! 767 00:26:35,997 --> 00:26:37,714 Let's just do this stupid meeting 768 00:26:37,716 --> 00:26:39,365 with these stupid clients. 769 00:26:39,733 --> 00:26:41,385 Hello, gentlemen. 770 00:26:42,966 --> 00:26:45,818 So we heard most of that. 771 00:26:45,891 --> 00:26:48,725 I'm realizing that now as I see the horrified looks 772 00:26:48,727 --> 00:26:50,426 on your faces. 773 00:26:50,428 --> 00:26:51,728 I'm so sorry. 774 00:26:51,730 --> 00:26:53,479 Paula and I were just having a little disagreement out there. 775 00:26:53,481 --> 00:26:54,380 It has nothing to do with you. 776 00:26:54,382 --> 00:26:56,099 It will not happen again. 777 00:26:56,101 --> 00:26:57,383 Let's get down to business, 778 00:26:57,385 --> 00:26:58,166 shall we? 779 00:26:58,191 --> 00:26:59,799 You know that was very inappropriate what we overheard. 780 00:26:59,824 --> 00:27:01,111 (cell phone chimes) I understand. One sec... 781 00:27:01,136 --> 00:27:02,518 _ 782 00:27:02,543 --> 00:27:04,424 (whoops) Going to Spiders. 783 00:27:04,534 --> 00:27:06,752 Which seems to be possessive plural. 784 00:27:07,895 --> 00:27:08,912 - Oh. - REBECCA: Oh, I'm sorry. 785 00:27:08,914 --> 00:27:10,446 Did I mention that I got Robertson 786 00:27:10,448 --> 00:27:12,072 to agree to an arbitration next week? 787 00:27:13,233 --> 00:27:14,233 I didn't mention that. 788 00:27:14,235 --> 00:27:15,705 Should have led with that. Sorry. 789 00:27:16,087 --> 00:27:17,403 How did you do that? 790 00:27:17,405 --> 00:27:19,255 Uh, we've been trying to do that for years. 791 00:27:19,257 --> 00:27:21,624 Actually, I threatened a lawsuit on the grounds 792 00:27:21,626 --> 00:27:23,242 that they were impeding commercial development, 793 00:27:23,244 --> 00:27:25,578 and that they would be liable for interest or extra costs. 794 00:27:25,580 --> 00:27:27,680 (clicks tongue) (chuckles) 795 00:27:27,682 --> 00:27:30,717 So, news flash... next week, you are going to a hearing 796 00:27:30,719 --> 00:27:32,385 that will allow you to... Most likely... 797 00:27:32,387 --> 00:27:35,521 Build the $10 million complex downtown you have always wanted 798 00:27:35,523 --> 00:27:36,424 in your little heart of hearts, 799 00:27:36,449 --> 00:27:38,963 and I am going to a super cool nightclub. 800 00:27:39,811 --> 00:27:41,427 Oh, I got to go get ready. 801 00:27:41,429 --> 00:27:44,197 I should buy jewelry, I don't have jewelry. 802 00:27:44,199 --> 00:27:46,399 (dance music pulsates) 803 00:27:53,551 --> 00:27:55,835 804 00:28:13,727 --> 00:28:15,294 Uh, love your dress. 805 00:28:15,296 --> 00:28:17,931 Oh, um, you too, bitches. 806 00:28:17,933 --> 00:28:19,349 Do you want to take a selfie? 807 00:28:19,351 --> 00:28:20,516 Yeah. 808 00:28:21,902 --> 00:28:23,633 Okay, all right, one, two, three. 809 00:28:23,658 --> 00:28:26,183 _ 810 00:28:26,208 --> 00:28:27,492 (phone rings) 811 00:28:30,995 --> 00:28:32,278 What? 812 00:28:32,280 --> 00:28:34,664 MAN: Uh, Mom, I stabbed Tommy. 813 00:28:34,666 --> 00:28:35,949 Uh, kind of. 814 00:28:35,951 --> 00:28:38,368 Brendan, I told you I had to work late. 815 00:28:38,370 --> 00:28:40,286 But, uh, he's sort of bleeding. 816 00:28:40,288 --> 00:28:42,781 Okay, you know what, figure it out. 817 00:28:47,295 --> 00:28:49,546 818 00:28:51,469 --> 00:28:52,386 Yeah. 819 00:28:52,411 --> 00:28:53,777 - (whoops) - (whoops) 820 00:28:53,802 --> 00:28:55,835 It's hugging my throat. 821 00:28:55,837 --> 00:28:58,104 (laughs) Don't you just love her, Joshy? 822 00:28:58,106 --> 00:28:59,355 Don't you just want to put her 823 00:28:59,357 --> 00:29:00,840 in a bowl with chocolate sauce and eat her? 824 00:29:00,842 --> 00:29:02,725 (imitates noshing) 825 00:29:02,727 --> 00:29:05,500 Uh, uh, I thought we were off sugar, Valencia. 826 00:29:05,525 --> 00:29:07,007 Oh, you're funny. 827 00:29:07,032 --> 00:29:08,681 I'm starting to like humor. 828 00:29:08,683 --> 00:29:10,016 Come on, dance with me, Joshy. 829 00:29:10,018 --> 00:29:12,068 I want to see you work that thang. 830 00:29:17,374 --> 00:29:20,126 What's up with your resting Maggie Smith face? 831 00:29:20,128 --> 00:29:21,411 What? 832 00:29:21,413 --> 00:29:22,662 What is this? 833 00:29:22,664 --> 00:29:24,964 This? This is called a metallic mini. 834 00:29:24,966 --> 00:29:27,242 No, the thing where you copy another girl's outfit. 835 00:29:27,267 --> 00:29:29,601 What are you up to, you duplicitous minx? 836 00:29:29,728 --> 00:29:31,611 I'm not copying her. 837 00:29:31,636 --> 00:29:33,636 I'm just heavily influenced by her, 838 00:29:33,661 --> 00:29:37,060 like... like how Picasso was influenced by early portraiture 839 00:29:37,062 --> 00:29:39,062 before he created the Cubist movement. 840 00:29:39,064 --> 00:29:41,230 You went to Harvard... We get it. 841 00:29:41,664 --> 00:29:44,067 Anyway, can I get you a drink? 842 00:29:44,320 --> 00:29:45,217 Um... 843 00:29:45,219 --> 00:29:47,186 How many bras are you wearing, by the way? 844 00:29:47,188 --> 00:29:48,855 (sighs) Come on, you crazy kids, let's dance. 845 00:29:48,857 --> 00:29:51,190 Okay. Come on. 846 00:29:51,192 --> 00:29:52,108 Okay. (whoops) 847 00:29:52,110 --> 00:29:54,560 Whoa, you clean up good. 848 00:29:54,562 --> 00:29:55,895 Oh, thanks. 849 00:29:55,897 --> 00:29:57,730 I'm just gonna go dance with my friend, though, so... 850 00:29:57,732 --> 00:29:59,449 Hey, whatever happened with you and your ex? 851 00:29:59,451 --> 00:30:00,399 Uh, I saw him over there. 852 00:30:00,401 --> 00:30:02,001 It's the buff Asian dude, right? 853 00:30:02,003 --> 00:30:03,419 Ex? 854 00:30:03,421 --> 00:30:04,737 No, he's not my ex. 855 00:30:04,739 --> 00:30:07,040 I... I was just talk... I was just talking... 856 00:30:07,042 --> 00:30:08,925 Oh, you're still bummed he's with that other girl. 857 00:30:08,927 --> 00:30:09,959 Don't worry. 858 00:30:09,961 --> 00:30:11,523 You'll get him, kid. 859 00:30:11,763 --> 00:30:13,890 Hey, I'll see you at the market. 860 00:30:14,471 --> 00:30:16,922 Oh, next week we're having a sale on clementines. 861 00:30:16,947 --> 00:30:18,780 It's gonna be tight! 862 00:30:21,020 --> 00:30:22,020 Wait a second. 863 00:30:22,383 --> 00:30:24,107 You and Josh dated? 864 00:30:24,109 --> 00:30:25,925 Okay, so nobody knows. 865 00:30:26,211 --> 00:30:27,426 Well, that guy knows. 866 00:30:27,428 --> 00:30:30,279 (scoffs) I am so stupid. 867 00:30:30,281 --> 00:30:32,598 It all makes sense now... Everything, all of it. 868 00:30:32,600 --> 00:30:35,151 - When did you date? In New York? - It's complicated. 869 00:30:35,153 --> 00:30:37,436 (scoffs) No, something with you is complicated? 870 00:30:37,438 --> 00:30:38,571 - VALENCIA: Rebecca! - Oh, my God. 871 00:30:38,573 --> 00:30:39,772 Just please... just please don't say anything. 872 00:30:39,774 --> 00:30:41,958 Please, please, please, please don't say anything. 873 00:30:41,960 --> 00:30:44,160 Please, please, please, please. 874 00:30:48,391 --> 00:30:49,691 Why so serious? 875 00:30:49,693 --> 00:30:51,393 Come on, dance with Greg. 876 00:30:51,395 --> 00:30:53,228 Dance with Greg. 877 00:30:55,399 --> 00:30:56,349 Get away from me. 878 00:30:56,351 --> 00:30:57,734 She-she wants me to dance with you. 879 00:30:57,736 --> 00:30:59,069 You do everything she says? 880 00:30:59,071 --> 00:31:00,570 No. 881 00:31:09,797 --> 00:31:12,048 (giggling): Hi. 882 00:31:17,371 --> 00:31:18,872 Ooh, oh. 883 00:31:25,146 --> 00:31:29,266 (whooping) 884 00:31:36,023 --> 00:31:39,659 Hey, cutie, don't know if you knew 885 00:31:39,661 --> 00:31:43,079 But I've kind of got a girl crush on you 886 00:31:43,081 --> 00:31:46,733 You're everything that I wish I could be 887 00:31:46,735 --> 00:31:50,253 Gonna tell you what I want to do to you, tee hee hee 888 00:31:50,255 --> 00:31:54,090 I want to lock you in a basement with soundproof walls 889 00:31:54,092 --> 00:31:57,627 And take over your identity 890 00:31:57,629 --> 00:32:01,598 I want to cut the silky hair right off your head 891 00:32:01,600 --> 00:32:04,851 And slurp it up like spaghetti 892 00:32:04,853 --> 00:32:06,720 Want to clone you and consume you 893 00:32:06,722 --> 00:32:08,605 Want to own you and cartoon you 894 00:32:08,607 --> 00:32:11,524 Fly your dirty panties like a kite 895 00:32:11,526 --> 00:32:12,258 Kite 896 00:32:12,260 --> 00:32:17,931 'Cause I-I-I-I 897 00:32:17,933 --> 00:32:21,484 Sorry I said that creepy stuff out loud 898 00:32:21,486 --> 00:32:25,038 That was super rando 899 00:32:25,040 --> 00:32:28,208 I meant to say I want to do cutesy stuff 900 00:32:28,210 --> 00:32:32,379 Like pillow fight or go swimming commando 901 00:32:32,381 --> 00:32:35,281 I want to kill you and wear your skin like a dress 902 00:32:35,283 --> 00:32:39,469 But then also have you see me in the dress 903 00:32:39,471 --> 00:32:42,389 And be like, �O-M-G, you look so cute in my skin� 904 00:32:42,391 --> 00:32:44,591 I want to lock you in a basement 905 00:32:44,593 --> 00:32:49,128 But in that basement you would also be my personal trainer 906 00:32:49,130 --> 00:32:50,680 I want your abs 907 00:32:50,682 --> 00:32:53,633 Break into your mom's house, collect your baby teeth 908 00:32:53,635 --> 00:32:56,653 And turn them into my new retainer 909 00:32:56,655 --> 00:32:58,154 I want your smile 910 00:32:58,156 --> 00:32:59,990 Cook your spit into a chowder 911 00:32:59,992 --> 00:33:01,808 Dry your sweat into a powder 912 00:33:01,810 --> 00:33:04,611 And do lines of you all through the night 913 00:33:04,613 --> 00:33:05,612 Night 914 00:33:05,614 --> 00:33:09,199 'Cause I-I-I-I-I-I-I 915 00:33:09,201 --> 00:33:10,750 I'm feeling kind of naughty 916 00:33:10,752 --> 00:33:12,652 Take measurements of your body 917 00:33:12,654 --> 00:33:14,487 Then go up to a surgeon 918 00:33:14,489 --> 00:33:16,206 Make my body like your body 919 00:33:16,208 --> 00:33:18,174 Like that film with Liberace 920 00:33:18,176 --> 00:33:21,795 'Cause I'm feeling kind of naughty tonight. 921 00:33:21,797 --> 00:33:24,180 (both laughing) 922 00:33:25,800 --> 00:33:27,517 Wait, wait. 923 00:33:33,774 --> 00:33:35,008 Oh! 924 00:33:35,010 --> 00:33:36,142 Are you crazy?! 925 00:33:36,144 --> 00:33:37,394 What is wrong with you?! 926 00:33:37,396 --> 00:33:38,728 We were just being cute! 927 00:33:38,730 --> 00:33:39,779 Cute kissing. 928 00:33:39,781 --> 00:33:41,031 For attention. 929 00:33:41,033 --> 00:33:43,349 (groans) Are you stupid, Harvard? 930 00:33:43,351 --> 00:33:45,385 Oh, this is why I can't be friends with women! 931 00:33:45,387 --> 00:33:47,687 Why does everyone want to have sex with me?! 932 00:33:47,689 --> 00:33:49,689 Okay, so, Valencia, Valencia? 933 00:33:49,691 --> 00:33:51,207 It's all good, okay? 934 00:33:51,209 --> 00:33:53,376 It's just, it's just there's so much love here. 935 00:33:53,378 --> 00:33:54,577 Just back off, okay? 936 00:33:54,579 --> 00:33:55,996 I-I think we should call it a night. 937 00:33:55,998 --> 00:33:57,564 - You think? - Hey, shh, come on. 938 00:33:57,566 --> 00:33:58,999 No, I-I just want to apologize! I want to talk to you... 939 00:33:59,001 --> 00:34:01,034 The reason why, the reason with her... Valencia? 940 00:34:01,036 --> 00:34:02,453 See, okay, it all makes sense, 941 00:34:02,478 --> 00:34:04,139 because it's a circle of love. 942 00:34:04,164 --> 00:34:05,576 Because I love you. 943 00:34:05,601 --> 00:34:06,716 You love Josh. 944 00:34:06,741 --> 00:34:08,958 And Josh and I used to love each other. 945 00:34:09,084 --> 00:34:11,251 (groans) 946 00:34:15,742 --> 00:34:17,843 What is this drunk bitch talking about? 947 00:34:17,845 --> 00:34:19,428 REBECCA: Um... 948 00:34:19,430 --> 00:34:21,463 so I'd like to start by saying 949 00:34:21,465 --> 00:34:22,734 that it was nothing. 950 00:34:22,759 --> 00:34:25,718 What... is... she... 951 00:34:25,720 --> 00:34:28,687 talking about?! 952 00:34:28,712 --> 00:34:29,968 Um... 953 00:34:30,691 --> 00:34:31,625 um... 954 00:34:32,426 --> 00:34:35,895 Do you remember that summer between 11th and 12th grade 955 00:34:35,897 --> 00:34:38,242 when, uh, I went to camp... 956 00:34:38,267 --> 00:34:40,289 and we were technically on a break? 957 00:34:40,314 --> 00:34:42,937 It was, it was eons ago! Right? It was eons ago! 958 00:34:42,962 --> 00:34:44,039 It meant nothing! 959 00:34:44,064 --> 00:34:45,880 It was just two young bucks 960 00:34:45,905 --> 00:34:48,539 sharing two months of summer love. 961 00:34:48,592 --> 00:34:50,142 It was a moment of connection. 962 00:34:50,167 --> 00:34:53,070 And isn't that what yoga's all about? 963 00:34:54,945 --> 00:34:56,898 Why did you lie to me? 964 00:34:56,923 --> 00:34:58,172 B-Because he... 965 00:35:00,226 --> 00:35:02,137 I-I was afraid. I was afraid. 966 00:35:02,139 --> 00:35:03,672 I was afraid, okay?! 967 00:35:03,674 --> 00:35:04,836 I was afraid. 968 00:35:04,861 --> 00:35:06,310 I don't know what you're trying to do 969 00:35:06,335 --> 00:35:09,286 or why you pretended to be my friend, 970 00:35:09,311 --> 00:35:11,133 but stay away from me 971 00:35:11,570 --> 00:35:13,250 and my Josh. 972 00:35:22,376 --> 00:35:23,562 Are you okay? 973 00:35:25,803 --> 00:35:26,945 No. 974 00:35:27,384 --> 00:35:29,300 Let me go out on a limb and say 975 00:35:29,520 --> 00:35:31,237 telling the truth from the beginning 976 00:35:31,262 --> 00:35:32,867 probably would've been the better option here? 977 00:35:32,892 --> 00:35:33,828 You're right. 978 00:35:35,531 --> 00:35:36,697 (chuckles) 979 00:35:36,722 --> 00:35:38,039 I messed everything up. 980 00:35:41,320 --> 00:35:43,161 Thank you for pointing it out. 981 00:35:43,163 --> 00:35:44,820 Is this what you wanted? 982 00:35:44,845 --> 00:35:45,836 You're right. 983 00:35:48,117 --> 00:35:49,518 I'm hungry. 984 00:35:49,520 --> 00:35:51,133 You want to go to a diner? 985 00:35:51,174 --> 00:35:52,840 Maybe get a cup of coffee? 986 00:35:52,865 --> 00:35:55,133 You could use a cup of coffee, some flapjacks. 987 00:35:55,158 --> 00:35:55,992 Just... I... 988 00:35:56,348 --> 00:35:58,031 Stop being nice to me, okay? 989 00:35:59,755 --> 00:36:02,423 Great to see you, Mr. Spiders! 990 00:36:02,925 --> 00:36:04,789 Well, at least that's been cleared up. 991 00:36:08,133 --> 00:36:11,135 (humming �We Wish You a Merry Christmas�) 992 00:36:13,539 --> 00:36:15,740 It's not Christmas! 993 00:36:16,586 --> 00:36:17,811 Well, I just like the song. 994 00:36:18,203 --> 00:36:19,062 Where's Rebecca? 995 00:36:19,064 --> 00:36:21,531 I usually see you two at break enjoying your Luna Bars. 996 00:36:21,533 --> 00:36:23,066 Who cares? I don't care about her. 997 00:36:23,068 --> 00:36:24,801 She talks too much. 998 00:36:24,803 --> 00:36:26,186 Well, I don't know about that. 999 00:36:26,188 --> 00:36:27,487 But she does always eat the Lemon Zest bars, 1000 00:36:27,489 --> 00:36:30,106 before I can get my mitts on them, mmm. 1001 00:36:30,108 --> 00:36:32,500 You know Luna Bars are for women, right? 1002 00:36:34,008 --> 00:36:35,996 Oh, I did not. 1003 00:36:35,998 --> 00:36:39,812 Yeah, I think they have, like, menstrual blood in them. 1004 00:36:40,297 --> 00:36:41,172 Stop that. 1005 00:36:41,197 --> 00:36:43,531 No, they don't. 1006 00:36:44,119 --> 00:36:45,343 Oof! 1007 00:36:46,781 --> 00:36:48,652 It's a long story. 1008 00:36:48,976 --> 00:36:52,012 Can I get the number for Luna Bars customer service? 1009 00:36:52,256 --> 00:36:53,875 I feel like I've lost her. 1010 00:36:55,367 --> 00:36:56,773 I know I still have you. 1011 00:36:56,798 --> 00:36:59,195 But you have your rugby friends now. 1012 00:37:01,920 --> 00:37:03,359 What should I do? 1013 00:37:09,961 --> 00:37:11,203 Hey. 1014 00:37:12,163 --> 00:37:13,437 Hey. 1015 00:37:15,434 --> 00:37:17,037 Oh! 1016 00:37:17,778 --> 00:37:19,387 Munchkin. 1017 00:37:20,200 --> 00:37:22,659 God, I am so sorry. 1018 00:37:22,981 --> 00:37:25,442 I'm such a bad friend. 1019 00:37:26,606 --> 00:37:28,665 You're the only person that I can trust. 1020 00:37:29,114 --> 00:37:30,717 You know why? You're a true friend. 1021 00:37:31,598 --> 00:37:33,336 Because a true friend is somebody who loves you 1022 00:37:33,708 --> 00:37:34,708 no matter what. 1023 00:37:35,192 --> 00:37:37,390 Even if your Downward Dog is horrible. 1024 00:37:37,392 --> 00:37:40,059 (laughing): Oh, come here. 1025 00:37:40,084 --> 00:37:41,633 Oh, you guys. 1026 00:37:41,665 --> 00:37:44,450 Ow, not you, Darryl! Get off! 1027 00:37:45,348 --> 00:37:47,622 You know, that's not true about Luna Bars. 1028 00:37:47,880 --> 00:37:49,397 Talked to the customer service. 1029 00:37:49,422 --> 00:37:50,879 They were very nice. 1030 00:37:57,171 --> 00:38:00,816 So, my client, Mr. Mendez, will drop his counter-suit 1031 00:38:00,841 --> 00:38:04,011 and will reimburse Mr. Robertson for all of his relocation fees 1032 00:38:04,036 --> 00:38:06,536 for the entire duration of construction. 1033 00:38:06,919 --> 00:38:09,372 Also, he will provide a free lease 1034 00:38:09,374 --> 00:38:10,674 on a floor-through space 1035 00:38:10,676 --> 00:38:12,356 for a period of 18 months. 1036 00:38:13,679 --> 00:38:15,512 Hmm, Ms. Bunch, 1037 00:38:15,514 --> 00:38:18,262 your arguments are... 1038 00:38:18,776 --> 00:38:20,177 persuasive. 1039 00:38:22,419 --> 00:38:24,020 I rule in your favor, Mr. Mendez. 1040 00:38:24,022 --> 00:38:25,555 You are free to build on that lot, 1041 00:38:25,557 --> 00:38:28,108 pending the usual approvals and inspections. 1042 00:38:28,110 --> 00:38:29,526 (laughing) 1043 00:38:29,528 --> 00:38:31,036 Thank you. 1044 00:38:31,262 --> 00:38:32,862 Ah! 1045 00:38:32,864 --> 00:38:35,932 I have been trying to settle this case for ten years. 1046 00:38:35,934 --> 00:38:37,867 Uh, yeah, I think you mentioned that once or twice. 1047 00:38:37,869 --> 00:38:40,770 This is what she did for you her first week of working for you. 1048 00:38:40,772 --> 00:38:42,706 Imagine what she's gonna do next week. 1049 00:38:42,708 --> 00:38:44,407 Yes! Yes! 1050 00:38:44,409 --> 00:38:45,825 - Yes! - Let's go. 1051 00:38:45,827 --> 00:38:47,711 - Go drink, gentlemen. - Yes! Ha-ha! 1052 00:38:47,713 --> 00:38:48,828 Thank you, thank you. 1053 00:38:48,830 --> 00:38:51,047 You're welcome. 1054 00:38:51,049 --> 00:38:52,332 (both shriek) 1055 00:38:52,334 --> 00:38:54,551 Oh, my God! 1056 00:38:54,553 --> 00:38:56,386 - Well done! - Bang! Bang! Bang! 1057 00:38:56,388 --> 00:38:57,504 Oh! Oh, guess what. 1058 00:38:57,506 --> 00:38:59,222 What? I got something for you. 1059 00:38:59,224 --> 00:39:00,456 Oh, Paula, another present? 1060 00:39:00,458 --> 00:39:01,624 Come on, you don't have to do that. 1061 00:39:01,626 --> 00:39:03,843 (stammers) Don't move. 1062 00:39:06,432 --> 00:39:09,568 I got these... 1063 00:39:09,934 --> 00:39:11,768 (both laughing) 1064 00:39:11,770 --> 00:39:14,404 for your feud with Valencia. 1065 00:39:14,406 --> 00:39:16,683 So, you know, 1066 00:39:17,067 --> 00:39:19,326 if it ever becomes a feud again, 1067 00:39:19,794 --> 00:39:23,113 we'll have these handy. 1068 00:39:23,115 --> 00:39:24,447 (laughs) 1069 00:39:24,449 --> 00:39:26,616 Paula, that's really sweet. 1070 00:39:26,618 --> 00:39:27,867 Thank you. 1071 00:39:27,869 --> 00:39:30,319 I just want you to know that if you ever need it, 1072 00:39:30,321 --> 00:39:34,528 this... T-shirt will always be there for you. 1073 00:39:35,583 --> 00:39:37,160 I know, thank you. 1074 00:39:37,162 --> 00:39:38,345 Okay. 1075 00:39:38,347 --> 00:39:39,596 And I'm here. 1076 00:39:39,598 --> 00:39:41,548 The-the T-shirt is me. 1077 00:39:41,550 --> 00:39:43,666 - Which you got that. - Yeah, I get it. 1078 00:39:43,668 --> 00:39:44,884 I don't know why 1079 00:39:44,886 --> 00:39:47,192 I felt the need to explain that to... 1080 00:39:51,225 --> 00:39:52,842 Hi, excuse me. 1081 00:39:52,844 --> 00:39:54,844 Um, I'm here to see Rebecca Bunch. 1082 00:39:54,846 --> 00:39:56,312 Is she here? 1083 00:40:01,958 --> 00:40:02,986 Hi. 1084 00:40:03,380 --> 00:40:04,404 Hi, do you have a second? 1085 00:40:05,581 --> 00:40:07,661 Uh, yeah, I have a second. 1086 00:40:07,686 --> 00:40:09,161 I have two seconds. 1087 00:40:09,186 --> 00:40:11,973 How many... (laughs) seconds do you need? 1088 00:40:11,998 --> 00:40:13,036 Let's take all the seconds. 1089 00:40:13,061 --> 00:40:14,311 Okay. Let's go... 1090 00:40:14,336 --> 00:40:15,451 This is my good luck room! 1091 00:40:15,653 --> 00:40:16,856 Let's go in my good luck room. 1092 00:40:17,034 --> 00:40:18,755 You know why it's my good luck room? 1093 00:40:18,780 --> 00:40:20,294 I just actually won, like, a big case in here. 1094 00:40:20,319 --> 00:40:23,645 Like, literally seconds ago, I won a huge case. Wow. 1095 00:40:23,670 --> 00:40:24,864 Yeah. This place is sweet! 1096 00:40:24,889 --> 00:40:26,051 Yeah, yeah, it's... 1097 00:40:26,076 --> 00:40:27,512 Why are you here? Why are... ? 1098 00:40:27,537 --> 00:40:29,671 Not, like, why are you here? Why are you here? 1099 00:40:29,898 --> 00:40:31,364 Uh, I've been thinking about it a lot, 1100 00:40:31,389 --> 00:40:33,145 and I realize... 1101 00:40:34,683 --> 00:40:36,247 I shouldn't have asked you to lie. 1102 00:40:36,272 --> 00:40:39,190 The-the crazy stuff that happened last night, it was 1103 00:40:39,215 --> 00:40:41,582 all my fault in a way, because of the lying. 1104 00:40:41,607 --> 00:40:44,775 No, no. Some of it was my fault, too. 1105 00:40:45,386 --> 00:40:48,637 I mean, sticking my tongue down your girlfriend's throat 1106 00:40:49,014 --> 00:40:50,247 kind of crossed a line. 1107 00:40:50,272 --> 00:40:51,067 Right? 1108 00:40:51,363 --> 00:40:53,176 Well, anyway, uh, I'd like to make it up to you. 1109 00:40:53,201 --> 00:40:56,820 So I was thinking you want to grab that dinner tonight? 1110 00:40:58,755 --> 00:41:00,145 Um... 1111 00:41:00,170 --> 00:41:01,294 yeah. 1112 00:41:01,801 --> 00:41:03,309 That sounds great. 1113 00:41:09,979 --> 00:41:12,647 - Mmm, mmm! - So good. 1114 00:41:12,672 --> 00:41:14,055 - Right? - Mmm! 1115 00:41:14,080 --> 00:41:15,613 - This place is awesome. - I know. 1116 00:41:15,638 --> 00:41:17,021 Do you come here a lot? 1117 00:41:17,046 --> 00:41:18,712 Well, nah, it's a little far. 1118 00:41:18,737 --> 00:41:21,771 I was gonna say I drove, like, 45 minutes to get here. 1119 00:41:21,796 --> 00:41:23,179 Yeah. 1120 00:41:23,756 --> 00:41:26,270 Does Valencia know we're hanging out tonight? 1121 00:41:26,295 --> 00:41:27,973 Uh, no, she says she doesn't want me 1122 00:41:27,998 --> 00:41:29,331 to see you ever again. 1123 00:41:29,356 --> 00:41:30,880 So this is probably the last time 1124 00:41:30,905 --> 00:41:32,571 we can have dinner. 1125 00:41:32,957 --> 00:41:35,157 (laughs) Well, we'll see about that. 1126 00:41:35,182 --> 00:41:36,399 (laughing): Yeah. 1127 00:41:36,987 --> 00:41:39,203 We'll see about that. 1128 00:41:44,926 --> 00:41:46,544 Welcome, everyone, 1129 00:41:46,569 --> 00:41:48,294 to Vampire Weekend. 1130 00:41:48,754 --> 00:41:50,551 For those of you who would like to go water-skiing, 1131 00:41:50,576 --> 00:41:51,864 there will be a tutorial 1132 00:41:51,889 --> 00:41:53,833 at 2:00... a.m. 1133 00:41:56,021 --> 00:41:56,886 You see? 1134 00:41:56,911 --> 00:41:59,831 -- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -- -- www.addic7ed.com -- 1135 00:41:59,881 --> 00:42:04,431 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 78349

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