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_
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_
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Jackie Kanken...
poorly-reviewed eBay seller.
4
00:00:50,651 --> 00:00:53,318
Eric Reynolds... tall fifth-grader.
5
00:00:53,320 --> 00:00:56,655
Quentin Poundridge...
Puerto Rican hand model.
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Lord, what a day.
7
00:01:11,738 --> 00:01:13,872
I have earned my Bud Light Chelada,
8
00:01:13,874 --> 00:01:15,874
I'll tell you that much.
So, what's happening?
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Not happy hour, that's for sure.
10
00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:19,344
It ended four minutes ago.
11
00:01:19,346 --> 00:01:21,515
Geez, Stan, okay. Sorry I'm late.
12
00:01:21,550 --> 00:01:23,948
I had to pay two extra bucks
for the jalapeño poppers,
13
00:01:23,950 --> 00:01:25,884
like I'm George friggin'
Soros over here.
14
00:01:25,886 --> 00:01:28,086
What... what's that bump
on your forehead?
15
00:01:28,088 --> 00:01:29,488
This? Oh, it's nothing.
16
00:01:29,490 --> 00:01:31,089
Just an ingrown eyebrow hair.
17
00:01:31,091 --> 00:01:32,424
Listen, I'm sorry I was late,
18
00:01:32,426 --> 00:01:35,227
but I promise you now have
my undivided attention.
19
00:01:35,229 --> 00:01:37,029
It's just that I always go out of my way
20
00:01:37,031 --> 00:01:38,296
to show up on time when...
21
00:01:38,298 --> 00:01:39,698
For the next four seconds.
22
00:01:39,700 --> 00:01:42,434
Three, two, one. Okay, gotta go.
23
00:01:42,436 --> 00:01:45,970
Few more items to cross
off the old to-do list.
24
00:01:45,972 --> 00:01:47,206
Late!
25
00:01:48,308 --> 00:01:50,042
Nacho Bartiromo...
26
00:01:50,044 --> 00:01:51,710
serial killer.
27
00:01:51,712 --> 00:01:53,378
Hyah!
28
00:01:58,102 --> 00:02:00,252
♪ Good morning, U.S.A. ♪
29
00:02:00,254 --> 00:02:03,722
♪ I got a feelin'
that it's gonna be a wonderful day ♪
30
00:02:03,724 --> 00:02:06,791
♪ The sun in the sky has
a smile on his face ♪
31
00:02:06,793 --> 00:02:11,096
♪ And he's shinin'
a salute to the American race ♪
32
00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:16,669
♪ Oh, boy, it's swell to say ♪
33
00:02:20,006 --> 00:02:23,375
♪ Oh, boy, it's swell to say... ♪
34
00:02:27,948 --> 00:02:29,013
Damn it, Roger!
35
00:02:30,084 --> 00:02:32,461
You snooze, you lose, Stan!
36
00:02:32,496 --> 00:02:33,752
I'm taking your spot today!
37
00:02:36,690 --> 00:02:39,591
♪ Good morning, U.S.A. ♪
38
00:02:40,481 --> 00:02:42,295
_
39
00:02:42,896 --> 00:02:44,696
Oh! Looks like they're putting in
40
00:02:44,698 --> 00:02:47,565
a new Yankee Candle this fall.
Not too shabby.
41
00:02:47,567 --> 00:02:50,168
Roger, I have been looking
all over town for you.
42
00:03:04,317 --> 00:03:05,583
She's the love of my life,
43
00:03:05,585 --> 00:03:07,651
but good grief, can she be a handful.
44
00:03:07,653 --> 00:03:09,721
Every single day, I get out of bed
45
00:03:09,723 --> 00:03:10,922
and sing my good morning song
46
00:03:10,924 --> 00:03:12,656
so that I can face the coming workday
47
00:03:12,658 --> 00:03:13,991
with gusto, zest,
48
00:03:13,993 --> 00:03:15,994
and most importantly, of course, verve.
49
00:03:15,996 --> 00:03:17,929
And all I ask of you is...
50
00:03:17,931 --> 00:03:19,130
Geez, Roger,
you sure you don't want to get
51
00:03:19,132 --> 00:03:20,598
that thing on your head checked out?
52
00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:22,661
What, this? I told you, it's nothing.
53
00:03:22,736 --> 00:03:24,869
Look, I'm sorry I flaked
on your little song,
54
00:03:24,871 --> 00:03:26,671
but I've been feeling
a little sluggish lately.
55
00:03:26,673 --> 00:03:28,473
Probably because you're
goofing off all the time
56
00:03:28,475 --> 00:03:29,874
doing your "personas."
57
00:03:29,876 --> 00:03:31,009
Goofing off?
58
00:03:31,011 --> 00:03:32,477
I'll have you know I got up
59
00:03:32,479 --> 00:03:34,746
at 4:30 this morning
to get into character
60
00:03:34,748 --> 00:03:37,149
as Russian banana inspector
Olladouis Goofoff.
61
00:03:37,151 --> 00:03:39,217
Does that sound like goofing off to you?
62
00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:41,553
I never flake on you,
and I have a real job.
63
00:03:41,555 --> 00:03:42,754
What I do matters.
64
00:03:42,756 --> 00:03:44,422
What I do matters, too!
65
00:03:44,424 --> 00:03:45,824
Oh, right, it really matters
66
00:03:45,826 --> 00:03:48,026
whether or not you run around all day,
blowing guys.
67
00:03:48,028 --> 00:03:51,629
That is only a very
large part of what I do.
68
00:03:51,631 --> 00:03:53,765
People depend on my personas, Stan.
69
00:03:53,767 --> 00:03:55,033
It might not seem like it,
70
00:03:55,035 --> 00:03:57,569
but this town would
fall apart without me.
71
00:03:57,571 --> 00:03:59,704
Come on, Eu-Meh.
Let's go to the Disney Store
72
00:03:59,706 --> 00:04:01,506
and take a nap on that big Simba.
73
00:04:01,508 --> 00:04:02,808
Ugh!
74
00:04:06,012 --> 00:04:07,745
♪ It don't mean a thing ♪
75
00:04:07,747 --> 00:04:10,215
♪ If it ain't got that swing ♪
76
00:04:10,217 --> 00:04:13,819
♪ Do-wap, do-wap, do-wap,
do-wap, do-wap, do-wap, do-wah ♪
77
00:04:13,821 --> 00:04:16,154
♪ Skiddily-diddly-deet-da ♪
78
00:04:16,156 --> 00:04:17,889
♪ Skee-ba-da-dee-dat-oh ♪
79
00:04:17,891 --> 00:04:20,358
♪ Bobbity-sku, bobbity-sku ♪
80
00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:22,828
♪ A hamba-beeba-seepah, da dee dat ♪
81
00:04:22,830 --> 00:04:24,896
♪ Diddily-diddily-diddily-diddily-doh ♪
82
00:04:24,898 --> 00:04:27,833
Smith, that sweet
and sassy speed-scatting
83
00:04:27,835 --> 00:04:30,702
is exactly why I asked you
to join the swing choir.
84
00:04:30,704 --> 00:04:32,570
The honor is all mine.
85
00:04:32,572 --> 00:04:34,372
Every since I got to Pearl Bailey,
86
00:04:34,374 --> 00:04:38,109
it's been a dream of mine
to join Jazzma Attack.
87
00:04:38,111 --> 00:04:41,446
Well, we're gonna be counting on
that mile-a-minute mouth magic
88
00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:42,914
of yours at the State finals.
89
00:04:42,916 --> 00:04:45,116
Now hit the showers, maggots!
90
00:04:51,534 --> 00:04:53,925
Are you doing drugs?!
91
00:04:53,927 --> 00:04:58,263
I'm doing what it takes for
Jazzma Attack to succeed.
92
00:04:58,265 --> 00:04:59,865
You gotta juice that scat speed
93
00:04:59,867 --> 00:05:02,133
if you want to compete at a State level.
94
00:05:02,135 --> 00:05:03,601
And you better take 'em, too, kid,
95
00:05:03,603 --> 00:05:05,803
unless you're not truly
committed to swing choir.
96
00:05:05,805 --> 00:05:07,673
Easy, Tyler. As the old saw goes,
97
00:05:07,675 --> 00:05:08,940
you can lead a horse to water,
98
00:05:08,942 --> 00:05:10,342
but you can't make him drink.
99
00:05:10,344 --> 00:05:11,543
Well put, Marcus.
100
00:05:14,481 --> 00:05:16,081
Get with the program, Smith.
101
00:05:16,083 --> 00:05:19,016
Even your buddy Barry is
mainlining testosterone
102
00:05:19,018 --> 00:05:22,620
to get that boomin' bass-y baritone.
103
00:05:22,622 --> 00:05:23,955
Shh.
104
00:05:23,957 --> 00:05:26,291
Nobody tell.
105
00:05:29,496 --> 00:05:32,831
Wait, the dog's name is Marmaduke?
106
00:05:33,767 --> 00:05:34,900
'Sup, my ninjas?!
107
00:05:34,902 --> 00:05:36,167
Jesus, Roger!
108
00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:37,235
Oh, my God!
109
00:05:37,237 --> 00:05:38,904
Do you want me to call you an ambulance?
110
00:05:38,906 --> 00:05:41,839
Why? Planning on making that
meat loaf of yours tonight?
111
00:05:43,520 --> 00:05:45,711
- Man.
- Roger, you have a tumor on your head.
112
00:05:45,713 --> 00:05:46,844
You need to see a doctor.
113
00:05:46,846 --> 00:05:48,646
What? Why?! I'm fine.
114
00:05:48,648 --> 00:05:50,716
Plus, I just have so much to do.
115
00:05:51,791 --> 00:05:54,119
Alexa, what's left
on my schedule for today?
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00:05:54,121 --> 00:05:55,520
You have a 3:15
117
00:05:55,522 --> 00:05:57,322
as traveling nurse DeAndre Comadendo.
118
00:05:57,324 --> 00:05:58,924
- Then after that...
- Klaus?
119
00:05:58,926 --> 00:06:00,858
Did you hollow out Roger's Echo?
120
00:06:00,860 --> 00:06:02,527
What?! No way!
121
00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:03,661
I'm not Klaus.
122
00:06:03,663 --> 00:06:05,597
It's me, Alexa, bro!
123
00:06:05,599 --> 00:06:07,933
Alexa, who was the fourth emperor
124
00:06:07,935 --> 00:06:09,867
of the Ming Dynasty?
125
00:06:09,869 --> 00:06:10,736
Um...
126
00:06:10,738 --> 00:06:12,604
Chickety-China,
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00:06:12,606 --> 00:06:14,606
the Chinese chicken.
128
00:06:14,608 --> 00:06:16,341
Huh. That could be right.
129
00:06:17,745 --> 00:06:19,677
Who's scorching all that copper wire?
130
00:06:19,679 --> 00:06:20,690
Smells great.
131
00:06:21,481 --> 00:06:22,614
Roger, listen to me.
132
00:06:22,616 --> 00:06:24,482
You need to go to a doctor right now!
133
00:06:24,484 --> 00:06:25,617
You could be dying.
134
00:06:25,619 --> 00:06:26,818
Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz.
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00:06:26,820 --> 00:06:27,791
That's you.
136
00:06:28,956 --> 00:06:31,223
Well, on you catch the side flip.
137
00:06:35,362 --> 00:06:36,494
What happened?
138
00:06:36,496 --> 00:06:38,230
Roger, you almost died.
139
00:06:38,232 --> 00:06:41,032
We got you to Dr. Kalgary
in just the nick of time.
140
00:06:41,034 --> 00:06:43,501
Yes. One scant moment longer,
141
00:06:43,503 --> 00:06:46,638
and this festering mass of disease
142
00:06:46,640 --> 00:06:51,509
would surely have claimed
your soul for the damned.
143
00:06:51,511 --> 00:06:53,911
By the way,
can I offer you a La Croix or something?
144
00:06:53,913 --> 00:06:56,782
Billy?! Get our guest a La Croix!
145
00:06:57,985 --> 00:07:00,918
There's no cold ones!
146
00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:03,921
What?!
Why didn't you put any in earlier?!
147
00:07:03,923 --> 00:07:06,792
You left an empty case in here!
148
00:07:06,794 --> 00:07:09,861
I don't have X-ray vision!
149
00:07:09,863 --> 00:07:11,463
Yes, you do, Billy!
150
00:07:12,635 --> 00:07:15,400
Billy, sometimes
you just make me so mad!
151
00:07:15,402 --> 00:07:16,401
Can I keep that?
152
00:07:16,403 --> 00:07:17,735
Sure! Whoop!
153
00:07:17,737 --> 00:07:19,004
Don't try to get up.
154
00:07:19,006 --> 00:07:21,673
You're in an extremely fragile state.
155
00:07:21,675 --> 00:07:25,811
You'll need absolute rest and
relaxation for several days!
156
00:07:25,813 --> 00:07:28,613
Anything we can do to help
while you recover, Roger,
157
00:07:28,615 --> 00:07:30,348
we'll do it. Right, Stan?
158
00:07:30,350 --> 00:07:32,550
Absolutely anything. Just name it.
159
00:07:32,552 --> 00:07:34,352
Good. Because, Stan,
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00:07:34,354 --> 00:07:37,422
I need you to take over my personas.
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00:07:37,424 --> 00:07:42,094
Ohhhhhh, shiiiiiit!
162
00:07:46,299 --> 00:07:48,099
Stan, thanks again for taking time off
163
00:07:48,101 --> 00:07:49,434
from work to cover my personas.
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00:07:49,436 --> 00:07:51,102
It'll really put my mind at ease
165
00:07:51,104 --> 00:07:54,172
while I'm convalescing at the
famed Chimdale Hot Springs.
166
00:07:54,174 --> 00:07:56,708
My cousin committed suicide there.
167
00:07:56,710 --> 00:07:58,243
It's beautiful.
168
00:07:58,245 --> 00:08:01,513
All of my personas are
of crucial importance.
169
00:08:01,515 --> 00:08:03,515
Messing up even the tiniest detail
170
00:08:03,517 --> 00:08:05,450
could have disastrous consequences.
171
00:08:05,452 --> 00:08:07,185
Uh-huh. Tiniest detail, got it.
172
00:08:07,187 --> 00:08:08,920
Now, before you put on
any of my costumes,
173
00:08:08,922 --> 00:08:12,257
you'll first need to get into
this alien skin body suit.
174
00:08:12,259 --> 00:08:13,659
It hides who you really are
175
00:08:13,661 --> 00:08:15,861
so the personas are all that people see.
176
00:08:15,863 --> 00:08:17,128
Right, right, cool.
177
00:08:17,130 --> 00:08:18,730
Oh, and stay out of this box over here.
178
00:08:18,732 --> 00:08:20,198
It's full of some personal stuff
179
00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:21,399
I don't want you getting into.
180
00:08:21,401 --> 00:08:23,801
Retired characters, my mineral rights,
181
00:08:23,803 --> 00:08:26,604
"Cougartown" DVD box set
signed by Larry Bird.
182
00:08:26,606 --> 00:08:29,207
Did Dick and Buckle go
to Houston together?
183
00:08:29,209 --> 00:08:30,876
Yeah. Tuttle's mom lives there.
184
00:08:30,878 --> 00:08:32,344
Stan, are you paying attention?
185
00:08:32,346 --> 00:08:33,679
Yeah, Roger, I got it.
186
00:08:33,681 --> 00:08:35,280
I'm gonna put on a stupid gray suit,
187
00:08:35,282 --> 00:08:36,614
dance around like an idiot,
188
00:08:36,616 --> 00:08:38,416
and do everything on your dumb list.
189
00:08:38,418 --> 00:08:39,484
Technically, that's correct,
190
00:08:39,486 --> 00:08:41,353
but I'm not liking your attitude.
191
00:08:41,355 --> 00:08:42,888
You're not taking this seriously.
192
00:08:42,890 --> 00:08:45,623
I guess I'll just have
to stay and do it myself.
193
00:08:47,160 --> 00:08:49,361
Careful, Roger! Geez!
194
00:08:49,363 --> 00:08:51,162
All right!
I promise I'll take it seriously.
195
00:08:51,164 --> 00:08:52,698
Okay. Then I'm off.
196
00:08:52,700 --> 00:08:55,100
Be a doll and hand me my tumor.
197
00:08:55,102 --> 00:08:56,902
I've gotten kind of attached to it.
198
00:08:56,904 --> 00:08:58,103
I even gave it a name...
199
00:08:58,105 --> 00:09:00,238
Rogu! Ain't he cute?
200
00:09:00,240 --> 00:09:02,173
Kiss him! Come on, kiss him.
201
00:09:02,175 --> 00:09:04,309
I'm not leaving till you
give him a little kiss.
202
00:09:04,311 --> 00:09:05,443
I will not kiss him.
203
00:09:05,445 --> 00:09:07,045
Well, then I'll kiss him.
204
00:09:07,047 --> 00:09:10,415
Now, if you kiss me,
it'll be like you kissed him.
205
00:09:14,454 --> 00:09:16,955
What do you think of that, Rogu?
206
00:09:19,459 --> 00:09:22,127
Now I don't come lightly
to tattling, sir,
207
00:09:22,129 --> 00:09:24,596
but, well, while I myself am not,
208
00:09:24,598 --> 00:09:28,100
some members of Jazzma
Attack are taking...
209
00:09:28,736 --> 00:09:30,602
...swing-enhancing drugs.
210
00:09:30,604 --> 00:09:32,870
This is extremely
disturbing news, Smith.
211
00:09:32,872 --> 00:09:36,207
When it comes to drugs,
I have a zero-tolerance policy...
212
00:09:36,209 --> 00:09:37,342
for not taking them!
213
00:09:39,413 --> 00:09:41,346
Was your desk...
214
00:09:41,348 --> 00:09:43,815
a piano... before?
215
00:09:43,817 --> 00:09:46,151
My office has always been like this!
216
00:09:46,153 --> 00:09:47,885
State is right around the corner.
217
00:09:47,887 --> 00:09:49,687
And we're going up
against our arch rivals
218
00:09:49,689 --> 00:09:52,157
from Virginia Beach High,
Jazz Good Jazz It Gets,
219
00:09:52,159 --> 00:09:53,825
"It" In This Case Being Jazz.
220
00:09:53,827 --> 00:09:56,562
So it goes without saying
I need a "W" here.
221
00:09:56,564 --> 00:10:00,231
You either take the drugs
or you don't take the stage.
222
00:10:00,233 --> 00:10:02,568
Now, Steve,
what do you think about this?
223
00:10:02,570 --> 00:10:05,437
Just a little something
I've been working on?
224
00:10:05,439 --> 00:10:06,371
Hmm.
225
00:10:06,373 --> 00:10:08,974
♪ The love of a woman ♪
226
00:10:08,976 --> 00:10:11,643
♪ Is a strange beast ♪
227
00:10:11,645 --> 00:10:13,178
That's all I've got so far.
228
00:10:13,180 --> 00:10:14,580
I'm hoping to sell it to Disney
229
00:10:14,582 --> 00:10:17,015
for one of their cartoons.
230
00:10:19,319 --> 00:10:23,121
Okay, Ronald Peechotka,
baseball card guy.
231
00:10:23,123 --> 00:10:25,657
Whip down display cases. Check.
232
00:10:25,659 --> 00:10:28,460
Talk up the Steve Balboni
rookie card by the register,
233
00:10:28,462 --> 00:10:31,129
frequently using the word
"cherry" as an adjective.
234
00:10:32,332 --> 00:10:34,600
Hey, how 'bout this Balboni here, eh?
235
00:10:34,602 --> 00:10:35,867
Sweet as a cherry.
236
00:10:35,869 --> 00:10:37,268
Sure is. Okay, Ron,
237
00:10:37,270 --> 00:10:38,203
I'm gonna have to lock up here
238
00:10:38,205 --> 00:10:39,937
in about five for lunch.
239
00:10:39,939 --> 00:10:40,872
What?
240
00:10:40,874 --> 00:10:42,007
Do I not work here?
241
00:10:42,009 --> 00:10:43,341
What?! No!
242
00:10:43,343 --> 00:10:44,810
I work here.
243
00:10:44,812 --> 00:10:46,311
You're just some creep.
244
00:10:47,147 --> 00:10:48,279
This is so pointless!
245
00:10:48,281 --> 00:10:49,547
It is not pointless!
246
00:10:49,549 --> 00:10:51,349
Roger? Where are you?
247
00:10:51,351 --> 00:10:52,684
In the serenity suite
248
00:10:52,686 --> 00:10:56,421
at the legendary Chimdale
Hot Springs Hotel and Spa.
249
00:10:56,423 --> 00:10:58,756
I sewed an ear piece
into your skin suit.
250
00:10:58,758 --> 00:11:01,159
Now, go ask Randy
if you can use his phone
251
00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:02,694
to make a long-distance call.
252
00:11:02,696 --> 00:11:03,829
Ugh!
253
00:11:03,831 --> 00:11:06,431
I can handle your
workload without any help.
254
00:11:07,131 --> 00:11:09,034
Stan, I just saw a deer!
255
00:11:09,036 --> 00:11:10,435
Or is that an elk?
256
00:11:10,437 --> 00:11:12,838
Or a moose? A horse?
257
00:11:12,840 --> 00:11:14,572
Oh, it's a picnic table.
258
00:11:14,574 --> 00:11:15,907
Stan?
259
00:11:18,712 --> 00:11:19,511
That's odd?
260
00:11:27,244 --> 00:11:31,144
_
261
00:11:35,529 --> 00:11:38,664
Andy Glan, former J.Crew employee.
262
00:11:41,335 --> 00:11:45,002
Dr. Dante Octavarius, seahorse breeder.
263
00:11:46,273 --> 00:11:49,541
Chunk Dunkirk,
incontinent jai alai instructor.
264
00:11:49,543 --> 00:11:52,009
"Incontinent jai alai instructor"?
265
00:11:52,011 --> 00:11:53,278
Incontinent jai alai instructor.
266
00:11:53,280 --> 00:11:55,881
All right, I'm calling it!
267
00:11:55,883 --> 00:11:57,683
Well?
268
00:11:57,685 --> 00:12:00,352
♪ Who puts the meth into Beth,
my best alto? ♪
269
00:12:00,354 --> 00:12:03,755
♪ Who gives the 'rone
that makes Barry very baritone? ♪
270
00:12:03,757 --> 00:12:05,823
♪ Yes, it's me ♪
271
00:12:05,825 --> 00:12:08,826
♪ Now, Smith, take these P.E.D.s ♪
272
00:12:08,828 --> 00:12:13,298
♪ You have to for the
good of the whole team ♪
273
00:12:13,300 --> 00:12:16,168
♪ Yeah ♪
274
00:12:20,374 --> 00:12:21,707
- Long day?
- Yeah.
275
00:12:21,709 --> 00:12:24,642
And I didn't even get halfway
through Roger's stupid list.
276
00:12:24,644 --> 00:12:27,445
"Doug Nugget,
unlicensed grief counselor.
277
00:12:27,447 --> 00:12:29,381
Take rollerblades in for repair."
278
00:12:29,383 --> 00:12:31,849
It's all even more
pointless than I thought.
279
00:12:31,851 --> 00:12:34,920
"Take rollerblades in for repair."
280
00:12:35,122 --> 00:12:38,738
_
281
00:12:38,858 --> 00:12:41,393
Well, it's time to face the fact.
282
00:12:41,395 --> 00:12:43,529
Doug Nugget's not coming.
283
00:12:43,531 --> 00:12:46,932
We won't be able to afford Ma's surgery.
284
00:12:46,934 --> 00:12:48,199
This ain't right!
285
00:12:49,069 --> 00:12:52,938
You want breast implants,
Ma, I'll get you the money!
286
00:12:54,274 --> 00:12:55,741
Gimme all the money!
287
00:12:58,412 --> 00:12:59,677
Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God,
288
00:12:59,679 --> 00:13:00,946
oh, God, oh, God, oh, God! Oh, God!
289
00:13:03,550 --> 00:13:05,350
Liquor store we run protection on
290
00:13:05,352 --> 00:13:06,351
just got hit.
291
00:13:06,353 --> 00:13:07,619
Had to be the Russians.
292
00:13:07,621 --> 00:13:09,154
We strike back hard.
293
00:13:09,156 --> 00:13:12,224
I don't know if Johnny
Lasagna'd be too keen on that.
294
00:13:12,226 --> 00:13:14,593
Well, Johnny Lasagna ain't here, is he?!
295
00:13:19,366 --> 00:13:21,767
Ach. Borschky dorshky.
296
00:13:23,971 --> 00:13:25,703
I'm okay!
297
00:13:27,975 --> 00:13:29,507
Borschky dorshky!
298
00:13:29,509 --> 00:13:30,976
Had to be the Irish.
299
00:13:36,058 --> 00:13:37,382
O'borschky o'dorshky!
300
00:13:37,384 --> 00:13:39,918
This means war!
301
00:13:48,728 --> 00:13:50,528
It seems to have all started
302
00:13:50,530 --> 00:13:51,997
with a botched robbery committed
303
00:13:51,999 --> 00:13:54,732
by the desperate son of a
humble rollerblade cobbler.
304
00:13:54,734 --> 00:13:57,485
Tale as old as time.
305
00:13:57,805 --> 00:14:02,808
♪ Good... morning... U.S.A. ♪
306
00:14:06,680 --> 00:14:09,347
Stan, the town is falling apart!
307
00:14:09,349 --> 00:14:10,682
Just call Roger up,
308
00:14:10,684 --> 00:14:13,017
admit that his personas do matter,
309
00:14:13,019 --> 00:14:14,352
and ask him what to do.
310
00:14:14,354 --> 00:14:15,954
No! I can still handle this.
311
00:14:15,956 --> 00:14:17,355
I'll just finish the list now,
312
00:14:17,357 --> 00:14:18,891
and then everything
will go back to normal.
313
00:14:19,960 --> 00:14:21,626
Oh, sick!
314
00:14:21,628 --> 00:14:22,928
No way!
315
00:14:25,566 --> 00:14:27,832
- Oh!
- Get a grip, man! It's too late!
316
00:14:27,834 --> 00:14:31,035
There's not one thing you
can do to fix things now!
317
00:14:31,037 --> 00:14:34,839
Although, there may be one thing...
318
00:14:37,778 --> 00:14:39,911
Hey, Franny.
I'm back from the hot springs
319
00:14:39,913 --> 00:14:41,646
and feeling better than ever.
320
00:14:41,648 --> 00:14:43,047
And I saw a picnic table!
321
00:14:43,049 --> 00:14:44,716
Roger, thank God!
322
00:14:44,718 --> 00:14:47,719
Listen,
Stan fell behind doing all your...
323
00:14:50,524 --> 00:14:52,056
All your personas,
324
00:14:52,058 --> 00:14:53,959
and then everything went...
325
00:14:55,862 --> 00:14:58,396
...to hell, and now the...
326
00:14:58,398 --> 00:15:00,132
n-now the whole...
327
00:15:00,934 --> 00:15:03,468
I'm sorry,
what in the living [bleep] is that?
328
00:15:03,470 --> 00:15:04,536
Oh, isn't it great?
329
00:15:04,538 --> 00:15:05,804
My tumor came to life,
330
00:15:05,806 --> 00:15:07,672
and now I've got a little homunculus.
331
00:15:07,674 --> 00:15:09,073
His name's Rogu.
332
00:15:09,075 --> 00:15:11,810
Rogu.
333
00:15:11,812 --> 00:15:14,412
'Sup, Hayley?
This is my homunculus Rogu.
334
00:15:14,414 --> 00:15:16,214
Jeff, my homunculus Rogu.
335
00:15:16,216 --> 00:15:18,483
No need to worry
about the chaos outside, Franny.
336
00:15:18,485 --> 00:15:20,485
I kind of figured something
like this would happen.
337
00:15:20,487 --> 00:15:23,221
I was so sick of Stan saying
what I did didn't matter.
338
00:15:23,223 --> 00:15:26,224
I wanted him to see for
himself how much it does.
339
00:15:26,226 --> 00:15:30,362
Rogu love Daddy.
340
00:15:34,234 --> 00:15:36,768
He loves his blue stuff.
341
00:15:36,770 --> 00:15:39,304
I promise I will fix everything
just as soon as I get
342
00:15:39,306 --> 00:15:41,639
all these turquoise
knick-knacks put away.
343
00:15:41,641 --> 00:15:42,975
I scored at the hot springs...
344
00:15:43,897 --> 00:15:46,911
Rogu, are you seeing what I'm seeing?
345
00:15:46,913 --> 00:15:48,780
Stan dressed up in the tough-guy outfit
346
00:15:48,782 --> 00:15:50,114
he found in there and went out
347
00:15:50,116 --> 00:15:51,850
to deal with all the mob bosses.
348
00:15:51,852 --> 00:15:53,718
We're all in great danger!
349
00:15:53,720 --> 00:15:56,254
That's not just any tough-guy, it's...
350
00:15:56,256 --> 00:15:58,456
Ricky Spanish.
351
00:15:58,458 --> 00:16:00,525
That's right, bitches!
352
00:16:00,527 --> 00:16:02,861
Ricky Spanish is back!
353
00:16:02,863 --> 00:16:05,129
And it's all thanks to Klaus.
354
00:16:05,131 --> 00:16:09,534
Who's your least-favorite
character now, Reddit?
355
00:16:11,938 --> 00:16:14,339
Gentlemen, if we divvy up the town,
356
00:16:14,341 --> 00:16:17,542
a truce could be
beneficial to all of us.
357
00:16:17,544 --> 00:16:20,745
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
358
00:16:20,747 --> 00:16:24,016
Ha ha ho ho ho ho ho hee hee.
359
00:16:24,018 --> 00:16:25,483
Milton Berle once said,
360
00:16:25,485 --> 00:16:27,485
"Laughter is an instant vacation."
361
00:16:27,487 --> 00:16:28,887
He had a real thick hog.
362
00:16:28,889 --> 00:16:30,288
Did you guys know that?
363
00:16:30,290 --> 00:16:31,690
Ricky Spanish?!
364
00:16:31,692 --> 00:16:33,692
What the hell are you doing here?
365
00:16:37,698 --> 00:16:40,965
Licky Anus.
366
00:16:40,967 --> 00:16:43,235
That was supposed to say
"Ricky Spanish."
367
00:16:43,237 --> 00:16:44,502
Good work, Stan.
368
00:16:44,504 --> 00:16:46,438
Now the town can go back to normal...
369
00:16:46,440 --> 00:16:49,575
if you'll just take off
the Ricky Spanish costume.
370
00:16:51,177 --> 00:16:54,446
No. I'm not taking off the costume.
371
00:16:54,448 --> 00:16:56,981
I'm taking over the town!
372
00:16:56,983 --> 00:17:00,985
And unleashing utter chaos!
373
00:17:00,987 --> 00:17:03,488
Ricky Spanish.
374
00:17:03,590 --> 00:17:05,657
Ricky Spanish.
375
00:17:06,660 --> 00:17:08,060
Ricky Spanish...
376
00:17:15,602 --> 00:17:17,669
Uh, check, please.
377
00:17:17,671 --> 00:17:19,137
Am I using that correctly?
378
00:17:19,139 --> 00:17:21,205
Roger, you have to stop him.
379
00:17:21,207 --> 00:17:23,475
Right. And I only have one persona
380
00:17:23,477 --> 00:17:25,877
as powerful, as dangerous...
381
00:17:26,492 --> 00:17:27,412
Oh, cute!
382
00:17:27,414 --> 00:17:32,016
As apocalyptic destructive
as Ricky Spanish.
383
00:17:36,757 --> 00:17:38,757
Hey, Spanish!
384
00:17:38,759 --> 00:17:39,891
Well!
385
00:17:39,893 --> 00:17:42,194
If it isn't my arch-nemesis...
386
00:17:43,430 --> 00:17:44,696
...Jeannie Gold.
387
00:17:44,698 --> 00:17:46,431
Yes, it is I...
388
00:17:46,433 --> 00:17:48,967
incontinent wedding
planner Jeannie Gold,
389
00:17:48,969 --> 00:17:50,702
who is, of course, also...
390
00:17:50,704 --> 00:17:52,104
your sister!
391
00:17:53,757 --> 00:17:56,975
So many things make sense now.
392
00:17:56,977 --> 00:17:59,844
Your reign of terror ends now.
393
00:18:05,986 --> 00:18:07,852
♪ It don't mean a thing ♪
394
00:18:07,854 --> 00:18:10,188
♪ If it ain't got that swing ♪
395
00:18:10,190 --> 00:18:11,723
♪ Do-wap, do-wap, do-wap ♪
396
00:18:11,725 --> 00:18:13,992
♪ Do-wap, do-wap,
do-wap, do-wap, do-wah ♪
397
00:18:13,994 --> 00:18:15,193
♪ Zwabada-hommina ♪
398
00:18:15,195 --> 00:18:16,194
♪ Biddyguh-goudy doo ♪
399
00:18:16,196 --> 00:18:17,596
♪ Zipbap-zipbap, boo ♪
400
00:18:17,598 --> 00:18:19,597
♪ Ziddy-dooddily-boodily-
dooddilly-boodily hey ♪
401
00:18:19,599 --> 00:18:21,466
♪ A-ziddily-doddily-boodily,
goddily, hey ♪
402
00:18:21,468 --> 00:18:23,335
♪ A-doodle-dop-beetle,
skee-ba-ba-dee-bum ♪
403
00:18:23,337 --> 00:18:24,937
♪ Diddily-diddily-diddily-
diddily-doh, ba-dow ♪
404
00:18:24,939 --> 00:18:26,671
♪ A-zup bop, bee-dop,
dee-dop a diddly-oop ♪
405
00:18:26,673 --> 00:18:28,206
♪ Beetle-op doodly, hey ♪
406
00:18:28,208 --> 00:18:30,608
♪ Hey, be-dop,
be-dop zoop bop diddle-hey ♪
407
00:18:50,831 --> 00:18:52,164
♪ Bop ♪
408
00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:03,842
Rogu save daddy.
409
00:19:03,844 --> 00:19:06,778
Rogu Spanish.
410
00:19:08,248 --> 00:19:11,316
Rogu! Did you make that
little Ricky Spanish outfit
411
00:19:11,318 --> 00:19:12,651
all by yourself?
412
00:19:12,653 --> 00:19:14,052
That is so clever.
413
00:19:14,054 --> 00:19:15,787
He's clearly very advanced.
414
00:19:15,789 --> 00:19:17,389
Some people... Holy shit!
415
00:19:26,066 --> 00:19:27,799
Oh, phew, it's not blood.
416
00:19:27,801 --> 00:19:29,934
That's just the polymer
gel from the suit's lining
417
00:19:29,936 --> 00:19:31,469
that gives it its...
418
00:19:31,471 --> 00:19:34,272
you know, alien...
419
00:19:34,274 --> 00:19:35,407
properties.
420
00:19:44,418 --> 00:19:48,420
I see. The power of the costume
infected the skin suit, too,
421
00:19:48,422 --> 00:19:50,154
so you had to strip it off completely.
422
00:19:50,156 --> 00:19:51,623
Yeah. Yeah, sure.
423
00:19:51,625 --> 00:19:54,826
Ooh!
424
00:19:59,700 --> 00:20:02,634
Somebody needs some morphine.
425
00:20:02,636 --> 00:20:04,502
Ah!
426
00:20:04,504 --> 00:20:07,572
Ah, what the hell... some for you, too.
427
00:20:12,846 --> 00:20:15,580
I love jazz!
428
00:20:15,582 --> 00:20:17,049
♪ Hey ♪
429
00:20:19,786 --> 00:20:21,653
Okay. I'll admit it, Roger.
430
00:20:21,655 --> 00:20:23,455
Your personas do matter.
431
00:20:23,457 --> 00:20:24,723
Thanks, Stan.
432
00:20:24,725 --> 00:20:26,791
But you know what really matters to me?
433
00:20:26,793 --> 00:20:27,859
You.
434
00:20:27,861 --> 00:20:29,061
So from now on,
435
00:20:29,063 --> 00:20:30,528
I'm gonna make more time for us.
436
00:20:30,530 --> 00:20:32,864
But how? You have so much to do.
437
00:20:32,866 --> 00:20:35,133
My body gave me a solution.
438
00:20:35,135 --> 00:20:37,069
It sensed I had too much to do,
439
00:20:37,071 --> 00:20:38,937
so that's why it gave me Rogu...
440
00:20:38,939 --> 00:20:40,805
to help take over some of my workload.
441
00:20:40,807 --> 00:20:42,540
That's something your race does?
442
00:20:42,542 --> 00:20:43,808
Apparently.
443
00:20:43,810 --> 00:20:46,010
Brock, what's up with you today?
444
00:20:46,012 --> 00:20:48,413
We're dying here. What's the play?
445
00:20:50,617 --> 00:20:54,953
Rogu do bootleg.
446
00:20:54,955 --> 00:20:56,922
There's the old gunslinger!
447
00:20:58,492 --> 00:21:00,459
Bye! Have a great time!
448
00:21:02,484 --> 00:21:04,525
- synced and corrected by sot26 -
www.addic7ed.com
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