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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:07,670 --> 00:00:09,640 Dad, please! 2 00:00:12,840 --> 00:00:14,340 Get out! 3 00:00:14,640 --> 00:00:17,140 Get out! 4 00:00:43,580 --> 00:00:45,920 Slow down! What are you doing?! 5 00:00:47,670 --> 00:00:49,510 What are you doing?! Slow down! 6 00:02:38,030 --> 00:02:40,660 Hello! 7 00:02:40,950 --> 00:02:43,790 My name is Gerry Dawkins 8 00:02:44,080 --> 00:02:47,750 and I am from Causton Social Services. 9 00:02:48,040 --> 00:02:51,130 It is essential that I talk to you. 10 00:02:52,210 --> 00:02:53,800 Hello? 11 00:02:56,250 --> 00:02:59,470 You are entitled to various benefits, you know. 12 00:03:00,840 --> 00:03:04,310 Meals on wheels, home help. 13 00:03:04,550 --> 00:03:07,980 I'll leave you with some pamphlets and forms for you to fill in. 14 00:03:08,230 --> 00:03:11,350 Thank you. 15 00:03:24,570 --> 00:03:26,790 - Hello. - Gerry Dawkins. 16 00:03:27,080 --> 00:03:29,630 - Causton Social Services. - And what do you want? 17 00:03:29,910 --> 00:03:33,170 I'm investigating the circumstances of William and Mary Bingham. 18 00:03:33,420 --> 00:03:35,670 - Do you know them? - They are my parents 19 00:03:35,960 --> 00:03:37,960 and they do not need investigating. Thank you. 20 00:03:38,260 --> 00:03:40,430 Yes, well, be that as it may, 21 00:03:40,720 --> 00:03:44,520 when a person or persons within the council's care parameters 22 00:03:44,760 --> 00:03:47,360 are not properly registered on the various databases... 23 00:03:47,640 --> 00:03:49,360 Hey, you're not listening, are you? 24 00:03:49,600 --> 00:03:52,230 Excuse me! We do have a zero tolerance policy 25 00:03:52,520 --> 00:03:54,570 towards verbal and physical abuse. 26 00:03:54,860 --> 00:03:56,610 Come back here, you're gonna need it. 27 00:03:56,900 --> 00:03:58,490 Start paddling. 28 00:04:03,570 --> 00:04:05,870 Oh, very smart. Do you really want them 29 00:04:06,120 --> 00:04:07,710 smeared all over the local papers? 30 00:04:07,950 --> 00:04:10,120 Selina, shut up. There's a doll. 31 00:04:10,410 --> 00:04:13,090 - I am not a doll. - That was irony. 32 00:04:13,370 --> 00:04:14,880 You couldn't even spell it. 33 00:04:17,670 --> 00:04:20,970 Look, we have got to stop slagging each other off in front of people. 34 00:04:21,260 --> 00:04:23,350 - Why? - Because we're a team. 35 00:04:23,630 --> 00:04:25,560 That's what I told the selection committee. 36 00:04:25,840 --> 00:04:27,350 No wonder they laughed. 37 00:04:51,790 --> 00:04:55,540 Hello. My name's Gerry Dawkins. 38 00:04:55,830 --> 00:04:58,760 That's Gerry with a "G", not a "J". 39 00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:01,300 Are you the head artist in this colony? 40 00:05:01,590 --> 00:05:05,090 Well, we don't actually do hierarchies here. 41 00:05:05,380 --> 00:05:08,010 Oh, right. No. 42 00:05:08,300 --> 00:05:10,060 Of course. 43 00:05:10,350 --> 00:05:12,100 Artists. 44 00:05:13,850 --> 00:05:15,820 Well, I'm from Causton Social Services. 45 00:05:16,100 --> 00:05:19,110 I wondered if I could have a word with you all. 46 00:06:04,650 --> 00:06:06,150 Come and see. 47 00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:09,950 And how are you, Sykes? Come here, come here. 48 00:06:11,200 --> 00:06:13,700 Has he been boring you to death? 49 00:06:25,510 --> 00:06:27,010 How long have you been here? 50 00:06:27,260 --> 00:06:29,760 Ten weeks. A whole term. 51 00:06:32,140 --> 00:06:34,190 I knew you'd rearrange everything when you got here. 52 00:06:41,020 --> 00:06:44,070 Well, at least you've got the kettle and the frying pan working. 53 00:06:44,360 --> 00:06:47,160 I did. 54 00:06:47,440 --> 00:06:49,490 And a clean collar. 55 00:06:49,780 --> 00:06:51,950 Did you get the washing machine going or find another woman? 56 00:06:52,240 --> 00:06:53,790 I bought a new shirt. 57 00:06:56,450 --> 00:06:58,500 Soya sauce? 58 00:06:58,790 --> 00:07:00,920 They've got a sushi bar. 59 00:07:01,170 --> 00:07:02,670 Cool. 60 00:07:02,960 --> 00:07:05,800 Much as we appreciate the freedom, 61 00:07:06,090 --> 00:07:08,560 considered the right of any artistic community, 62 00:07:08,840 --> 00:07:11,090 you must understand that we all share 63 00:07:11,380 --> 00:07:14,100 the same social services. 64 00:07:14,390 --> 00:07:17,230 So databases have to be current 65 00:07:17,520 --> 00:07:19,390 or they are worthless. 66 00:07:19,680 --> 00:07:21,810 I should therefore like you all 67 00:07:22,100 --> 00:07:24,730 to fill in these forms I've brought with me. 68 00:07:25,020 --> 00:07:27,240 Believe you me, we're all part of the system. 69 00:07:27,530 --> 00:07:31,080 You can't beat the system, can you? Eh? 70 00:07:31,320 --> 00:07:33,200 For goodness' sake! 71 00:07:33,490 --> 00:07:35,580 I'm a council official! 72 00:07:35,870 --> 00:07:37,790 I demand that you put me down immediately 73 00:07:38,080 --> 00:07:40,830 or I shall be reporting you all to the authorities 74 00:07:41,120 --> 00:07:43,090 as soon as I return! 75 00:07:43,330 --> 00:07:45,050 Put me down! 76 00:07:52,840 --> 00:07:56,720 We do have a zero tolerance to violence! 77 00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:14,160 It's not as big as your last one. 78 00:08:14,450 --> 00:08:17,330 Yeah, but I wasn't the head there. 79 00:08:17,620 --> 00:08:20,920 - So, what have you got to do today? - Meet my department heads, 80 00:08:21,200 --> 00:08:23,670 who will hate me because I'm an outsider. 81 00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:26,510 You could retire. We could live off my earnings. 82 00:08:26,790 --> 00:08:30,590 That's a brilliant idea: poverty and boredom at one stroke. 83 00:08:30,880 --> 00:08:33,300 Right, I'll see you later. 84 00:08:49,900 --> 00:08:53,750 I was going about my legitimate business, caring for our community, 85 00:08:54,030 --> 00:08:57,030 and what happens? At the Binghams', I get manhandled. 86 00:08:57,320 --> 00:09:00,830 At the artist community, well, as related. 87 00:09:01,080 --> 00:09:03,250 Physical or verbal abuse cannot be tolerated. 88 00:09:03,540 --> 00:09:05,170 Quite right, too, sir. 89 00:09:05,420 --> 00:09:07,340 But I think being chucked in a duck pond 90 00:09:07,630 --> 00:09:09,840 is a matter for our uniformed people. 91 00:09:10,130 --> 00:09:13,180 They said, as death threats have been made, it was down to you. 92 00:09:13,470 --> 00:09:15,220 Death threats? 93 00:09:15,510 --> 00:09:17,810 Implied. 94 00:09:18,090 --> 00:09:21,390 I mean, people who try willy-nilly to slip through the governmental net 95 00:09:21,680 --> 00:09:23,310 are obviously dangerous per se. 96 00:09:23,600 --> 00:09:25,520 You cannot opt out of the system, can you? 97 00:09:25,770 --> 00:09:27,360 Why not? 98 00:09:27,600 --> 00:09:31,280 - I'm sorry? - Why can't you opt out of the system? 99 00:09:33,610 --> 00:09:35,490 Well, you just can't. 100 00:09:35,780 --> 00:09:39,410 Mr Dawkins, we will investigate the matter and be in touch. 101 00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:43,200 Right, well, good. 102 00:09:44,580 --> 00:09:46,080 Thank you. 103 00:09:49,420 --> 00:09:52,090 - We don't have time for time wasters. - Course we do, Jones. 104 00:09:52,380 --> 00:09:56,100 We can't have abuse-mad anarchists running amok all over the place. 105 00:09:56,380 --> 00:09:58,810 Tomorrow morning, first thing, artist's colony, then Binghams. 106 00:10:00,970 --> 00:10:03,220 So, as my department heads, 107 00:10:03,470 --> 00:10:05,400 I will be relying on you all from the word go. 108 00:10:05,680 --> 00:10:09,400 Together we will take Causton to the top of the county league table 109 00:10:09,690 --> 00:10:11,310 within two years. 110 00:10:14,150 --> 00:10:15,700 Thank you, Mrs Barnaby. 111 00:10:15,990 --> 00:10:18,660 And as deputy head, I would like to welcome you 112 00:10:18,950 --> 00:10:21,170 - on behalf of all the staff. - How kind. 113 00:10:21,450 --> 00:10:23,170 Of course, you will find that there are certain people 114 00:10:23,450 --> 00:10:24,950 who are somewhat surprised 115 00:10:25,250 --> 00:10:27,960 by the department parachuting in an outsider 116 00:10:28,250 --> 00:10:30,590 to take over from the seasoned locals. 117 00:10:30,830 --> 00:10:32,340 Josie, I totally agree with you. 118 00:10:32,630 --> 00:10:34,760 The department is run by a bunch of irrational idiots, 119 00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:38,760 but I guess we just have to cope and all pull together, don't you think? 120 00:10:39,010 --> 00:10:41,480 Anyway, before we embark on our journey, 121 00:10:41,760 --> 00:10:43,860 I would love for you all to come to my place for lunch 122 00:10:44,140 --> 00:10:45,890 so we can really get to know each other, 123 00:10:46,180 --> 00:10:48,480 and you can fill me in on all the local goss. 124 00:11:08,620 --> 00:11:10,170 I won, I won. 125 00:11:10,460 --> 00:11:12,460 - I let you win. - You did not! 126 00:11:17,170 --> 00:11:20,430 Oh, isn't this wonderful? Can we just live here forever? 127 00:11:20,720 --> 00:11:23,190 - Sounds like a plan. - So let's get on with it. 128 00:11:23,470 --> 00:11:25,020 - All in good time. - Ben! 129 00:11:25,310 --> 00:11:28,400 - What? I've got to watch my job. - But Daddy thinks you're great. 130 00:11:28,680 --> 00:11:31,690 And Selina's only my stepmother, so she can go hang. 131 00:11:31,980 --> 00:11:35,480 We can do whatever we like, whenever we like. 132 00:11:35,770 --> 00:11:38,280 Look, I better get going. I've got a mare due in for Garrick Boy. 133 00:11:38,570 --> 00:11:40,320 - What's he like? - Edgy. 134 00:11:40,570 --> 00:11:42,200 I'll see you later. 135 00:11:47,910 --> 00:11:49,960 You won't get away from me! 136 00:12:10,060 --> 00:12:11,560 Hiya. 137 00:12:16,520 --> 00:12:19,870 - Where's it all gone? What's she done? - My senior staff and I 138 00:12:20,110 --> 00:12:22,700 bonded through an unpacking and homemaking experience. 139 00:12:22,950 --> 00:12:25,040 Ah. How are they? 140 00:12:25,320 --> 00:12:27,870 Ugh. Well, my deputy hates me. 141 00:12:28,160 --> 00:12:30,910 She's a great bookkeeper but I may have to strangle her. 142 00:12:31,200 --> 00:12:33,330 You are so bad. 143 00:12:38,590 --> 00:12:41,560 The, uh, new bed's arrived. 144 00:12:41,800 --> 00:12:43,850 Look at your watch and I'll kill you. 145 00:12:49,140 --> 00:12:50,730 Stay. 146 00:14:24,730 --> 00:14:27,030 - Paper, Mary? - Thank you, darling. 147 00:14:27,320 --> 00:14:30,160 But I seem to have mislaid my spectacles. 148 00:14:30,410 --> 00:14:32,960 Perhaps if you could just put it aside for me, 149 00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:34,700 and then I'll get round to it later. 150 00:14:34,990 --> 00:14:36,620 Right-o. 151 00:14:38,620 --> 00:14:40,880 - Anything interesting? - Er, not a lot. 152 00:14:41,170 --> 00:14:43,300 Jolly good. 153 00:14:43,590 --> 00:14:46,340 Too much news is never a good thing. 154 00:14:46,590 --> 00:14:50,340 Right. Absolutely right. 155 00:14:50,640 --> 00:14:52,480 Say no more. 156 00:14:52,760 --> 00:14:55,110 Say no more. 157 00:15:03,190 --> 00:15:04,690 - Teeth? - Yes. 158 00:15:04,980 --> 00:15:06,530 - Fingernails? - Don't push it, woman. 159 00:15:11,950 --> 00:15:13,540 - Those for me? - From everyone at the station. 160 00:15:13,830 --> 00:15:16,830 - To welcome your wife to Midsomer. - How lovely. 161 00:15:17,120 --> 00:15:18,920 Sarah, this is Jones. Jones, my wife. 162 00:15:19,210 --> 00:15:20,710 - Ma'am. - Sarah, please. 163 00:15:20,960 --> 00:15:22,460 And I'm sure you weren't christened Jones. 164 00:15:22,750 --> 00:15:24,420 - Ben. - Thank you, Ben. 165 00:15:24,710 --> 00:15:26,550 - Would you like a coffee? - No, he wouldn't. 166 00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:28,640 - We're working. - Well, drop by anytime, Ben. 167 00:15:28,920 --> 00:15:31,050 - Thank you. - Thank you. 168 00:15:34,850 --> 00:15:37,020 She didn't mean that, dropping by. 169 00:15:37,270 --> 00:15:38,770 No, sir. Of course not. 170 00:15:44,060 --> 00:15:47,490 Sense of humour. Delusions of grandeur. 171 00:15:47,780 --> 00:15:49,740 They're here. 172 00:15:55,620 --> 00:15:57,120 Inspector Barnaby. 173 00:15:57,410 --> 00:15:59,330 - Mr Grace. - Adam, please. 174 00:15:59,620 --> 00:16:01,840 - This is Maggie Viviani. - We knew your cousin. 175 00:16:02,120 --> 00:16:04,050 Oh, good. 176 00:16:05,420 --> 00:16:07,260 Please. 177 00:16:08,670 --> 00:16:11,850 Back in the '60s, there was a guy called Bertie Morell. 178 00:16:12,130 --> 00:16:14,230 He set this place up and then drank himself to death. 179 00:16:14,510 --> 00:16:16,010 Mr Barnaby. 180 00:16:16,300 --> 00:16:19,310 - So who runs it now? - Nominally, the trustee's solicitor, 181 00:16:19,600 --> 00:16:23,020 that's Laurence Fletcher. But on a day-to-day basis, 182 00:16:23,310 --> 00:16:25,810 Maggie and I just try and keep it afloat. 183 00:16:26,110 --> 00:16:29,110 So, Gerry Dawkins. 184 00:16:29,360 --> 00:16:30,910 Duck pond. 185 00:16:31,190 --> 00:16:34,290 It's just the kids having a bit of fun. It's no big deal. 186 00:16:34,530 --> 00:16:36,620 It was assault. 187 00:16:38,780 --> 00:16:40,880 Yes. Inspector, could you please 188 00:16:41,160 --> 00:16:43,630 convey our apologies to Mr Dawkins, 189 00:16:43,920 --> 00:16:46,890 and tell him that if he wants us to fill in his forms, 190 00:16:47,170 --> 00:16:49,890 he should send them to each person here individually, 191 00:16:51,300 --> 00:16:54,850 and they will attend to them accordingly. 192 00:16:56,140 --> 00:16:59,110 You mean chuck them in the bin. 193 00:16:59,390 --> 00:17:02,190 Well, we don't tell each other what to do. 194 00:17:02,480 --> 00:17:04,650 We are individuals, Mr Barnaby. 195 00:17:06,560 --> 00:17:08,660 "We are individuals." 196 00:17:08,900 --> 00:17:10,650 "We are a pack of plonkers." 197 00:17:10,900 --> 00:17:14,120 - Not keen on artists, Jones? - Well, not the modern ones. 198 00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:16,660 I mean, Jackson Pollock, paint dripping. 199 00:17:16,950 --> 00:17:19,790 - What's all that about? - I don't know. 200 00:17:20,080 --> 00:17:22,250 Maybe he had an intuition for the nature of chaotic motion 201 00:17:22,540 --> 00:17:25,920 and was attempting a mathematical representation of that chaos. 202 00:17:26,210 --> 00:17:28,180 Tell me about this Laurence Fletcher. 203 00:17:28,460 --> 00:17:31,180 Uh, solicitor. 204 00:17:31,460 --> 00:17:33,010 A bit tricky. Known locally as Loophole Larry. 205 00:17:35,260 --> 00:17:37,180 Jones. 206 00:17:37,430 --> 00:17:39,520 Hello, Mr Dawkins. 207 00:17:39,760 --> 00:17:42,890 I have something important to relate 208 00:17:43,180 --> 00:17:45,650 regarding our ongoing investigation. 209 00:17:45,940 --> 00:17:48,110 - And what's that? - If you come to my office ASAP, 210 00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:50,070 I'll tell you all about it. 211 00:17:50,360 --> 00:17:53,530 Mr Dawkins, we do have other business to attend to. 212 00:17:53,780 --> 00:17:56,450 - It is very important. - Right. Fine. 213 00:17:56,740 --> 00:17:58,790 We'll be back at the station later this afternoon. 214 00:17:59,070 --> 00:18:00,830 - You can drop by then. Okay? - But... 215 00:18:01,120 --> 00:18:02,990 Bye-bye. Wants us to do house calls. 216 00:18:07,210 --> 00:18:10,840 - You okay? - It's not right. 217 00:18:11,130 --> 00:18:13,550 Nobody ever gets things right and precise. 218 00:18:15,630 --> 00:18:18,640 I have to go out, meet someone. 219 00:18:22,260 --> 00:18:25,640 - It's not in your diary. - Not everything is, Jane. 220 00:18:35,150 --> 00:18:36,650 Three, two, one, drop. 221 00:18:47,500 --> 00:18:50,750 Three, two, one, drop. 222 00:18:51,000 --> 00:18:52,750 Don't play in the road. 223 00:18:58,630 --> 00:19:01,010 - Poohsticks. - Sorry? 224 00:19:01,300 --> 00:19:04,270 Winnie the Pooh. You each drop a stick into the water, 225 00:19:04,560 --> 00:19:07,060 then run across the bridge to see whose stick comes out first 226 00:19:07,350 --> 00:19:10,100 - on the other side. - And it's a good way to get run over. 227 00:19:10,390 --> 00:19:13,020 Childhood, Jones. Hang on to the poetry. 228 00:19:13,310 --> 00:19:14,820 Yes, sir. 229 00:19:43,090 --> 00:19:45,970 - William? - I'm up here. 230 00:19:46,220 --> 00:19:48,320 I think I heard the doorbell ring. 231 00:19:48,600 --> 00:19:50,820 No, I doubt that, my dear. 232 00:19:51,060 --> 00:19:53,690 - I think I did. - No. Not likely. 233 00:19:53,980 --> 00:19:55,730 There. See? 234 00:19:56,020 --> 00:19:58,200 Yes. Yes. 235 00:19:58,480 --> 00:20:02,360 I see what you mean. But it wouldn't be for us. 236 00:20:02,660 --> 00:20:04,620 Well, it's not Wednesday or anything, is it? 237 00:20:04,910 --> 00:20:06,960 No, but it is our bell. 238 00:20:07,240 --> 00:20:10,920 But not our business, darling. Not our business. 239 00:20:11,210 --> 00:20:14,930 - Are you sure? - Absolutely. 240 00:20:15,210 --> 00:20:17,300 Thank you, darling. 241 00:20:17,590 --> 00:20:19,430 I'll be in my study. 242 00:20:19,710 --> 00:20:22,180 See you for coffee and biscuits at 11:00. 243 00:20:22,430 --> 00:20:24,970 What a truly wonderful idea. 244 00:20:27,260 --> 00:20:28,860 What do we know about the Binghams? 245 00:20:29,100 --> 00:20:32,270 They're said to be a bit reclusive. 246 00:20:32,560 --> 00:20:34,530 Their two children 247 00:20:34,770 --> 00:20:37,070 died way back in a tragic accident. 248 00:20:37,360 --> 00:20:39,150 Youngest surviving daughter and her husband 249 00:20:39,440 --> 00:20:42,870 run the stud farm part of the estate. He's running for local Euro MP, 250 00:20:43,150 --> 00:20:46,530 so he must be bent. 251 00:20:46,780 --> 00:20:49,500 Well, they're not replying. 252 00:20:49,790 --> 00:20:51,630 We'll try the back. 253 00:20:54,960 --> 00:20:57,260 Renovations are a bit behind. 254 00:20:59,340 --> 00:21:03,060 Whoa. Hold it. 255 00:21:03,340 --> 00:21:06,690 What's that? 256 00:21:06,970 --> 00:21:08,470 That's a tripwire. 257 00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:12,480 Watch this. 258 00:21:19,150 --> 00:21:21,200 That's a distress flare. ls that legal? 259 00:21:21,480 --> 00:21:23,280 A great burglar alarm. 260 00:21:23,570 --> 00:21:26,070 Hello. What are you doing? 261 00:21:26,360 --> 00:21:28,830 You've set off one of his fireworks. He hates that. 262 00:21:29,120 --> 00:21:32,420 Hi, Verity. It's me. 263 00:21:34,500 --> 00:21:36,470 Salsa classes. Remember? 264 00:21:36,750 --> 00:21:39,750 Oh, Jonesy. Hi! 265 00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:42,100 Where's your nice uniform? 266 00:21:42,380 --> 00:21:44,100 I'm a detective now. 267 00:21:44,340 --> 00:21:46,810 Shame. 268 00:21:47,840 --> 00:21:49,890 We were hoping to see the Binghams. 269 00:21:50,180 --> 00:21:53,560 No chance. The oldies never see anyone. They are so weird. 270 00:21:53,850 --> 00:21:55,480 I've only met them once, 271 00:21:55,770 --> 00:21:58,770 and my dad has been married to Selina for ten years. 272 00:21:59,020 --> 00:22:00,940 We were also hoping to see your parents. 273 00:22:01,190 --> 00:22:02,990 Sure. Why not? 274 00:22:03,280 --> 00:22:05,650 Uh, Mrs Bitch, my wicked stepmother, 275 00:22:05,950 --> 00:22:09,320 is in the covering shed with our stud manager, Ben Viviani. 276 00:22:09,620 --> 00:22:11,330 Real hunk. 277 00:22:11,580 --> 00:22:13,120 Two Bens. 278 00:22:13,410 --> 00:22:16,130 And daddy is stamping around in a bad mood 279 00:22:16,370 --> 00:22:19,630 because the local selection committee thinks he's a bit common, which of course he is. 280 00:22:19,880 --> 00:22:22,470 And there's a stallion who's giving us all a terrible time because... 281 00:22:22,710 --> 00:22:26,140 Verity. Too much information. 282 00:22:26,380 --> 00:22:28,850 Sorry, sorry. 283 00:22:29,130 --> 00:22:31,260 It's just what Ben says: "You talk too much." 284 00:22:31,550 --> 00:22:33,060 My Ben, that is. 285 00:22:35,350 --> 00:22:37,480 Is there any young woman round here you haven't dated? 286 00:22:37,730 --> 00:22:39,600 Just looking for the right one. 287 00:22:40,980 --> 00:22:43,900 How did you know Mrs Barnaby was right for you? 288 00:22:44,190 --> 00:22:45,820 She told me. 289 00:22:46,110 --> 00:22:48,160 Yeah. 290 00:22:51,530 --> 00:22:55,080 See. That's the mare who's come to be covered by the stallion, Garrick Boy, 291 00:22:55,370 --> 00:22:57,840 who's being a bit loony today. 292 00:22:58,120 --> 00:23:00,250 - Why? - God knows. 293 00:23:00,540 --> 00:23:03,420 They are so highly strung. Pure nerves and energy. 294 00:23:03,710 --> 00:23:07,010 Slightest thing and they get in a total strop. 295 00:23:09,260 --> 00:23:10,930 - What are you doing? - He won't go to her. 296 00:23:11,180 --> 00:23:12,680 - Something's upset him. - What? 297 00:23:12,970 --> 00:23:15,020 - I don't know. - Well, you should know. 298 00:23:15,260 --> 00:23:18,520 He doesn't function, we drop a hundred grand. 299 00:23:18,810 --> 00:23:22,030 Get your mother over here, get her to do her horse whispering stuff. 300 00:23:22,270 --> 00:23:25,200 And get that hunk of animated pet food back on the job. 301 00:23:25,440 --> 00:23:27,110 Who are you? 302 00:23:29,820 --> 00:23:33,620 Oh, for crying out loud! I did not assault anyone. 303 00:23:33,910 --> 00:23:36,540 I gently escorted him to his car 304 00:23:36,830 --> 00:23:39,830 and asked him to get off our property. 305 00:23:40,120 --> 00:23:43,590 And there were no threats of any kind of violence whatsoever. 306 00:23:43,880 --> 00:23:45,920 - The man's a fantasist. - And we are quite capable 307 00:23:46,210 --> 00:23:48,560 of looking after our own family members, 308 00:23:48,800 --> 00:23:50,550 however bonkers they are. 309 00:23:50,840 --> 00:23:54,440 - Excuse me. Those are my parents. - Yeah, well, they owe me big time. 310 00:23:54,720 --> 00:23:58,320 I do all the work, I pay all the bills, I keep this place afloat. 311 00:23:58,600 --> 00:24:01,570 But oh, no, nutty mummy and nutty daddy have to live in the big house. 312 00:24:01,810 --> 00:24:03,440 Well, it is their home. 313 00:24:03,730 --> 00:24:05,230 If they left there, they'd disintegrate. 314 00:24:05,520 --> 00:24:07,740 Good! About time they did something worthwhile. 315 00:24:09,820 --> 00:24:13,040 I'm sorry, Chief Inspector. It's been a trying day. 316 00:24:13,320 --> 00:24:15,200 This is very simple. Let me see your parents, 317 00:24:15,490 --> 00:24:17,910 so I can vouch for their well being to the Social, 318 00:24:18,200 --> 00:24:19,880 and I'm sure all this will go away. 319 00:24:20,120 --> 00:24:21,620 My parents will only communicate 320 00:24:21,910 --> 00:24:25,210 through their solicitor, Laurence Fletcher. Go through him. 321 00:24:25,500 --> 00:24:28,470 He will then write to my parents, then they will write back to him. 322 00:24:28,750 --> 00:24:30,300 And they'll say no anyway. 323 00:24:30,550 --> 00:24:33,680 Let's see if I can't help you focus on this problem. 324 00:24:33,970 --> 00:24:37,190 Get Gerry Dawkins in to check up on your parents within two days 325 00:24:37,470 --> 00:24:40,270 or it will become an official matter for the police. 326 00:24:40,560 --> 00:24:42,940 Okay? 327 00:24:43,190 --> 00:24:44,730 Jones. 328 00:24:53,700 --> 00:24:55,200 Hiya. 329 00:25:03,290 --> 00:25:04,960 Hi, Mum. 330 00:25:05,250 --> 00:25:08,670 My darling boy! Come here. 331 00:25:11,550 --> 00:25:13,800 Oh. And how are you? 332 00:25:14,050 --> 00:25:17,140 I'm fine. I'm fine. 333 00:25:17,390 --> 00:25:19,640 There's something wrong. I can hear it. 334 00:25:19,890 --> 00:25:22,560 Oh, well, Garrick Boy is playing up, 335 00:25:22,850 --> 00:25:26,070 and I was hoping you could come over and have a word. 336 00:25:26,350 --> 00:25:28,230 - Yes, of course. - Thanks. 337 00:25:28,520 --> 00:25:30,620 And? 338 00:25:30,900 --> 00:25:32,990 Nothing. It's all cool. 339 00:25:33,240 --> 00:25:34,830 Verity? 340 00:25:35,070 --> 00:25:39,000 Yeah, she's great. Really. It's all good. 341 00:25:41,540 --> 00:25:43,080 What? 342 00:25:45,080 --> 00:25:47,330 Hey, guys. Let's play Poohsticks again. 343 00:25:49,420 --> 00:25:51,920 Three, two, one, drop. 344 00:25:53,460 --> 00:25:57,090 I bet mine's gonna come across first. 345 00:25:57,380 --> 00:25:59,560 See it? 346 00:25:59,850 --> 00:26:01,850 What's that? 347 00:26:02,140 --> 00:26:03,980 What is it? 348 00:26:18,030 --> 00:26:21,960 Gerry with a "G". 349 00:26:22,240 --> 00:26:23,790 Over here! 350 00:26:24,080 --> 00:26:26,580 Multiple facial and upper body wounds 351 00:26:26,870 --> 00:26:29,470 and an indentation at the back of the skull. 352 00:26:29,710 --> 00:26:31,210 What do you think? 353 00:26:31,500 --> 00:26:33,880 Turned his canoe over, banged his head, unconscious, 354 00:26:34,130 --> 00:26:35,720 dragged along the bottom until he drowned. 355 00:26:37,670 --> 00:26:39,430 I'll do a full PM and call you. 356 00:26:43,850 --> 00:26:45,390 There you go. 357 00:26:53,650 --> 00:26:57,320 He wanted to talk to me and I fobbed him off. 358 00:26:57,610 --> 00:26:59,240 And now he's dead. 359 00:26:59,490 --> 00:27:01,240 Yes. Yes, he is. 360 00:27:04,370 --> 00:27:06,790 - So, what would you have done? - Sorry? 361 00:27:07,080 --> 00:27:10,210 Well, someone really irritates you, you put them on the back burner. 362 00:27:10,500 --> 00:27:12,130 I mean, how was I supposed to know? 363 00:27:12,380 --> 00:27:13,880 - Jones. - Yes, sir? 364 00:27:14,170 --> 00:27:15,890 This circus, this death in the afternoon, 365 00:27:16,170 --> 00:27:18,470 what is it not about? 366 00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:20,760 It's not about me. 367 00:27:21,010 --> 00:27:23,510 Ergo, therefore, in parallel. Hmm? 368 00:27:24,760 --> 00:27:27,560 It's not about me either. 369 00:27:27,850 --> 00:27:31,610 It's about mechanics, logistics, evidence, 370 00:27:32,860 --> 00:27:35,860 and what sort of salad we make of those wonderful ingredients. 371 00:27:39,990 --> 00:27:41,530 Fine, fine. 372 00:27:41,820 --> 00:27:44,120 Make me feel better, then. 373 00:27:47,120 --> 00:27:49,670 Oh, for God's sake, come on! 374 00:27:49,960 --> 00:27:53,380 - Where the hell is your damn mother?! - I'm right here, Selina. 375 00:27:53,670 --> 00:27:57,010 About time. This one's driving us insane 376 00:27:57,250 --> 00:27:58,800 and costing us serious money. 377 00:27:59,090 --> 00:28:02,470 He might not be so nervy if you stopped yelling at him. 378 00:28:02,720 --> 00:28:04,270 And everyone else. 379 00:28:04,550 --> 00:28:07,850 Yes, thank you. Just do your stuff and keep your lectures to yourself. 380 00:28:09,470 --> 00:28:11,020 Hello, boy. 381 00:28:11,310 --> 00:28:13,860 What's going on, then, hmm? Come on. Let's have a chat. 382 00:28:14,150 --> 00:28:16,990 Just you and me. Nice and quiet. Come on. 383 00:28:17,270 --> 00:28:19,650 Come on. Come on, boy. 384 00:28:22,740 --> 00:28:25,990 Have people been shouting at you? Is that all it is? 385 00:28:26,280 --> 00:28:29,000 He's calmer already. 386 00:28:29,290 --> 00:28:32,710 So you're not feeling quite yourself? Hmm? Stand. Stand. 387 00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:35,880 I'd like to see you up at the house later. 388 00:28:37,840 --> 00:28:40,180 - Uh, Selina. - What? 389 00:28:40,420 --> 00:28:44,350 I'm pretty busy today. I've got a couple of mares coming in later. 390 00:28:44,590 --> 00:28:46,690 Ben, this is my business 391 00:28:46,970 --> 00:28:49,060 and you are my employee. 392 00:28:49,350 --> 00:28:51,690 I'll decide when you're busy. 393 00:28:56,480 --> 00:28:57,980 Good boy. There you go. 394 00:29:00,230 --> 00:29:03,200 - So, what's bugging him? - He's got a dental problem, 395 00:29:03,490 --> 00:29:06,080 which is stopping him chewing properly. 396 00:29:06,370 --> 00:29:09,340 His food isn't digesting and hence compacting in his gut, 397 00:29:09,620 --> 00:29:12,500 giving him severe gripe, which puts him off his oats, 398 00:29:12,790 --> 00:29:15,040 both literal and metaphorical. 399 00:29:15,330 --> 00:29:17,010 He told you all that, did he? 400 00:29:17,290 --> 00:29:19,550 Yes, he did. 401 00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:21,800 Take it or leave it. I don't care. 402 00:29:22,090 --> 00:29:23,890 I'll see you all soon. Bye, darling. 403 00:29:24,170 --> 00:29:25,720 Thanks, Mum. 404 00:29:33,770 --> 00:29:37,360 Why does she always smile at me? Why is she so nice? 405 00:29:37,650 --> 00:29:40,620 - Maybe she likes you. - Ha! Unlikely. 406 00:29:40,900 --> 00:29:43,900 Right, call the vet, then. 407 00:29:44,190 --> 00:29:47,540 And I'll see you at 4:00. And don't be late. 408 00:29:52,580 --> 00:29:55,210 - So Miss Morris... - Jane. 409 00:29:55,500 --> 00:29:57,500 Jane. 410 00:29:57,790 --> 00:30:00,420 You say he had a call before he called me. 411 00:30:00,670 --> 00:30:02,800 Yes, and it got him a bit rattled. 412 00:30:03,090 --> 00:30:05,590 He was going on about it being contrary to departmental procedures 413 00:30:05,840 --> 00:30:07,470 for them to meet. 414 00:30:07,720 --> 00:30:09,220 But he didn't say who it was or what they wanted. 415 00:30:09,510 --> 00:30:11,010 No. 416 00:30:11,260 --> 00:30:12,770 And you didn't hear whether it was a man or a woman? 417 00:30:13,020 --> 00:30:14,520 - No. - Then he went canoeing. 418 00:30:14,810 --> 00:30:18,110 He said he was going to meet someone but obviously he went canoeing. 419 00:30:18,350 --> 00:30:20,650 Did he often go canoeing in the middle of the day? 420 00:30:20,940 --> 00:30:24,530 I don't know. He always had that thing on top of his car. 421 00:30:24,820 --> 00:30:28,740 He was often out and about checking up on people, so maybe he did. 422 00:30:29,030 --> 00:30:31,000 How was he regarded in the department? 423 00:30:31,280 --> 00:30:34,500 He was known as The Witchfinder General. 424 00:30:34,790 --> 00:30:37,960 - Not too popular? - Universally disliked. 425 00:30:38,250 --> 00:30:40,300 - Won't be missed by anyone. - That's a bit tough. 426 00:30:40,540 --> 00:30:42,090 You asked me a question. 427 00:30:42,380 --> 00:30:44,720 It would be a waste of time if I wasn't honest with you. 428 00:30:45,010 --> 00:30:48,510 Not many people think like that. 429 00:30:59,980 --> 00:31:02,480 - Are you married? - I'm not going out with you. 430 00:31:02,770 --> 00:31:05,450 - I didn't ask you to. - But you would have. 431 00:31:05,730 --> 00:31:08,280 I fit your search profile to a T. 432 00:31:10,530 --> 00:31:12,530 Here's his diary. You see this afternoon? 433 00:31:12,820 --> 00:31:14,950 MV and AG. 434 00:31:15,240 --> 00:31:16,870 Maggie Viviani and Adam Grace, before you ask. 435 00:31:17,160 --> 00:31:18,840 Thank you. 436 00:31:19,080 --> 00:31:20,920 He also printed off a map of the moon. 437 00:31:25,630 --> 00:31:27,180 I haven't a clue. 438 00:31:30,050 --> 00:31:31,800 Would you like to ask me anything else? 439 00:31:32,090 --> 00:31:35,890 No. No. I wouldn't dare. 440 00:31:55,280 --> 00:31:58,210 - The moon? - Yeah. Seems weird. 441 00:32:00,620 --> 00:32:03,590 You want to come in now? I have got a job to go to. 442 00:32:11,680 --> 00:32:14,800 That's his stuff. His clothes peg, his helmet. 443 00:32:15,100 --> 00:32:18,850 So he wouldn't ever have gone out in the wrong gear? 444 00:32:19,140 --> 00:32:20,730 Not our Gerry with the "G". 445 00:32:21,020 --> 00:32:23,490 A stickler for form, he is. Was. 446 00:32:23,770 --> 00:32:27,150 Certainly wouldn't have gone on the water without his precious crash lid. 447 00:32:32,070 --> 00:32:35,870 - Popular member of the club? - Not really. In fact, not at all. 448 00:32:36,160 --> 00:32:38,160 Get up your nose like a rocket, he could. 449 00:32:38,450 --> 00:32:40,420 Total pain. 450 00:32:40,700 --> 00:32:43,210 Rest in peace, of course. 451 00:32:43,500 --> 00:32:45,470 No, uh, no disrespect. 452 00:32:53,130 --> 00:32:55,930 - Hey. - Right on time. 453 00:32:57,350 --> 00:32:59,140 The vet's been. 454 00:32:59,430 --> 00:33:01,900 He agreed with mum's diagnosis, so he's filed the tooth 455 00:33:02,180 --> 00:33:03,730 and given the boy something to clear the bowel blockage. 456 00:33:04,020 --> 00:33:05,520 Good. 457 00:33:05,770 --> 00:33:07,400 Verity and Eddie are out for a couple of hours, 458 00:33:07,690 --> 00:33:10,360 so we'd better get about our business. 459 00:33:13,530 --> 00:33:16,280 Look, if it's okay, 460 00:33:16,570 --> 00:33:18,540 I'd rather not. 461 00:33:18,830 --> 00:33:20,950 Why would you rather not? 462 00:33:21,240 --> 00:33:22,750 It's p-personal. 463 00:33:23,040 --> 00:33:26,590 - Personal? - Yeah. 464 00:33:26,880 --> 00:33:29,800 Ben, let me explain things to you. 465 00:33:30,050 --> 00:33:32,390 I'm not interested in your personal life. 466 00:33:32,670 --> 00:33:36,520 But as your employer, I am interested in you doing what I want when I want. 467 00:33:36,800 --> 00:33:39,980 - Yeah, but... - No, no. No buts, Ben. 468 00:33:41,720 --> 00:33:44,820 Just do as I ask and you'll go far. 469 00:33:45,060 --> 00:33:47,480 Don't, and you won't. 470 00:33:54,240 --> 00:33:58,040 I haven't a clue why he had our initials in his diary. 471 00:33:58,320 --> 00:34:00,290 I mean, we didn't make an appointment with him. 472 00:34:00,530 --> 00:34:02,130 Definitely not. 473 00:34:04,200 --> 00:34:06,130 There's not much in public records about you people. 474 00:34:06,410 --> 00:34:09,040 Us people? 475 00:34:09,290 --> 00:34:10,840 Yes. 476 00:34:11,090 --> 00:34:13,380 In some countries, they think that if you take their photos, 477 00:34:13,670 --> 00:34:15,220 you're stealing their souls. 478 00:34:15,510 --> 00:34:18,260 And maybe we feel that if you know too much about us, 479 00:34:18,510 --> 00:34:20,010 you're capturing ours. 480 00:34:20,260 --> 00:34:23,020 I think it's more about benefits than souls. 481 00:34:24,770 --> 00:34:26,310 Where were you both earlier today? 482 00:34:26,600 --> 00:34:28,850 I was checking out a barn 483 00:34:29,100 --> 00:34:30,900 for our summer exhibition. 484 00:34:31,190 --> 00:34:33,030 I went over to the Bingham place 485 00:34:33,320 --> 00:34:35,440 to help my son with a fractious horse. 486 00:34:35,740 --> 00:34:37,360 What do you do with horses? 487 00:34:37,610 --> 00:34:39,160 I talk to them. 488 00:34:41,320 --> 00:34:44,000 - What? - Horses... 489 00:34:44,290 --> 00:34:46,710 Animals in general, like to talk to me. 490 00:34:46,960 --> 00:34:48,460 What, like Doctor Doolittle? 491 00:34:50,040 --> 00:34:53,260 Just because some things don't come in your coppers Little Book of Knowledge 492 00:34:53,550 --> 00:34:55,170 doesn't mean you can mock them. 493 00:34:55,460 --> 00:34:57,090 No, no. I'm genuinely interested. 494 00:34:57,380 --> 00:34:59,560 Really. I have a dog that I talk to, 495 00:34:59,840 --> 00:35:01,970 but it's pretty much a one-way thing. 496 00:35:03,600 --> 00:35:07,350 Well, I've always had an empathy with animals, particularly horses. 497 00:35:08,520 --> 00:35:12,240 I call it talking, but it's really just a sort of feeling 498 00:35:12,520 --> 00:35:15,120 - I get from them. - And can you do it with people? 499 00:35:15,400 --> 00:35:18,400 Oh, yes. That's easy. 500 00:35:18,650 --> 00:35:21,080 Well, you, for instance, are reasonably content 501 00:35:21,320 --> 00:35:23,580 with your lot in life. 502 00:35:23,870 --> 00:35:25,790 Whereas your chum here is full of frustration 503 00:35:26,040 --> 00:35:27,540 at the state of his. 504 00:35:29,250 --> 00:35:32,380 But that's certainly common with unmarried men in their 30s. 505 00:35:35,500 --> 00:35:39,050 If you talk to God, that's fine. God talks to you. Blah-de-blah. 506 00:35:39,340 --> 00:35:42,470 - Ditto animals. - Open mind, Jones. 507 00:35:42,760 --> 00:35:45,980 Murder is not the consequence of rational behaviour. 508 00:35:47,600 --> 00:35:49,940 Now, Bingham's dodgy solicitor, where do I find him today? 509 00:35:50,190 --> 00:35:52,810 Ah. Yearling sales. Him and Stanton. 510 00:35:53,100 --> 00:35:56,280 So the Birtley filly out of that great winning mare 511 00:35:56,520 --> 00:35:59,950 whose the down of six winners already from only seven faults of racing age. 512 00:36:00,240 --> 00:36:01,780 At 8,000, I've got. At 8,000, I'm bid. 513 00:36:03,820 --> 00:36:06,790 This filly's far too cheap, sir. 514 00:36:07,080 --> 00:36:09,210 Barnaby, Fletcher. Fletcher, Barnaby. 515 00:36:09,500 --> 00:36:12,590 - Heard a lot about you, Inspector. - And me you, Mr Fletcher. 516 00:36:12,830 --> 00:36:14,380 Well, I've got to go and bid. 517 00:36:14,670 --> 00:36:16,760 I've told Larry you want to see the old geezers. 518 00:36:19,010 --> 00:36:20,970 And of course, I'd love to be able to help you, 519 00:36:21,220 --> 00:36:23,890 but, urn, the Binghams are a really eccentric couple now, 520 00:36:24,180 --> 00:36:28,020 and they tend to refuse any requests for meetings. I'm really sorry. 521 00:36:28,310 --> 00:36:30,650 Mr Fletcher, I am investigating a murder 522 00:36:30,930 --> 00:36:33,690 and I am going to talk to your clients right now. 523 00:36:33,980 --> 00:36:37,650 This was just a courtesy meeting to inform you of my actions. 524 00:36:37,900 --> 00:36:40,320 Inspector, this isn't the big city here. 525 00:36:40,610 --> 00:36:42,530 In Midsomer, we do things differently. 526 00:36:42,820 --> 00:36:44,990 A different pace, different emphasis. 527 00:36:45,240 --> 00:36:47,410 We do things our way. 528 00:36:47,700 --> 00:36:50,920 No, Mr Fletcher, when it comes to the law, we do things my way. 529 00:36:51,200 --> 00:36:53,750 Call your clients now. 530 00:36:55,580 --> 00:36:59,510 ยฃ19,000. On the right at ยฃ19,000 I've got. 531 00:36:59,750 --> 00:37:01,630 You're out here and you're out there. 532 00:37:23,110 --> 00:37:25,990 Well, that wasn't too painful, was it? 533 00:37:26,280 --> 00:37:29,830 No, it was nice. Thank you. 534 00:37:30,120 --> 00:37:33,250 Thank you. 535 00:37:33,540 --> 00:37:36,040 Still, can't hang about. 536 00:37:36,290 --> 00:37:37,880 They'll be back soon. 537 00:37:44,220 --> 00:37:46,390 So, what am I gonna do about Verity? 538 00:37:48,090 --> 00:37:49,770 Uh, how do you mean? 539 00:37:50,050 --> 00:37:52,770 Well, she's flopping around like some spaniel puppy, 540 00:37:53,060 --> 00:37:55,900 so she must be in love. 541 00:37:56,190 --> 00:37:57,810 But as she hasn't told me who it is, 542 00:37:58,100 --> 00:38:00,950 I can only presume it's some ghastly local inbred. 543 00:38:01,190 --> 00:38:02,740 Really? 544 00:38:02,980 --> 00:38:06,910 Anyway, I'm arranging for her to live in London for a while. 545 00:38:07,990 --> 00:38:10,240 So with a bit of luck, she'll meet a nice cash machine banker 546 00:38:10,490 --> 00:38:12,540 who'll cart her off into the sunset. 547 00:38:14,540 --> 00:38:16,040 Don't touch it! 548 00:38:20,420 --> 00:38:22,920 Selina. 549 00:38:23,170 --> 00:38:25,090 Yes, Eddie. What do you want? I'm busy. 550 00:38:26,970 --> 00:38:29,850 Oh, God. How boring. 551 00:38:30,140 --> 00:38:33,360 Yes, all right. I'll deal with it. Bye. 552 00:38:33,640 --> 00:38:36,360 That's all I bloody need, that policeman's coming over. 553 00:38:46,280 --> 00:38:47,870 Oh, God. It's him already. 554 00:38:48,150 --> 00:38:49,780 Ben, quick. Let him in. 555 00:38:50,070 --> 00:38:51,620 Let him in! 556 00:39:06,090 --> 00:39:07,970 Oh, hi. 557 00:39:08,260 --> 00:39:10,850 - Ben, isn't it? - Yeah. 558 00:39:14,390 --> 00:39:16,980 Oh. I was just doing some work in the bathroom. 559 00:39:17,230 --> 00:39:21,030 Ah. Mrs Stanton around? 560 00:39:21,310 --> 00:39:24,070 Hello, Inspector. 561 00:39:25,940 --> 00:39:28,910 My husband said you were coming. 562 00:39:29,200 --> 00:39:31,790 Ben, you can finish off later. 563 00:39:32,070 --> 00:39:35,500 So, I gather you insist on seeing my parents. 564 00:39:35,740 --> 00:39:38,370 With the death of Gerry Dawkins... 565 00:39:38,620 --> 00:39:40,170 Oh, yes. Yes. 566 00:39:40,420 --> 00:39:43,340 So, so sad. Such an interesting man. 567 00:39:44,590 --> 00:39:46,260 I was hoping you might be able to accompany me 568 00:39:46,550 --> 00:39:48,140 so that I don't alarm your parents. 569 00:39:48,420 --> 00:39:51,350 I think it might be the other way round. 570 00:39:53,470 --> 00:39:55,020 Come along, then. 571 00:40:01,270 --> 00:40:04,520 Mummy, Daddy, open up! It's me. 572 00:40:08,570 --> 00:40:11,540 You're wasting your time. They're totally doolally. 573 00:40:17,950 --> 00:40:20,880 - William Bingham? - Yes. 574 00:40:21,120 --> 00:40:24,220 Detective Chief Inspector John Barnaby. 575 00:40:24,460 --> 00:40:26,210 Oh, yes. 576 00:40:26,460 --> 00:40:28,710 We heard you were dropping by. 577 00:40:28,960 --> 00:40:31,890 Oh, how jolly nice of you. 578 00:40:32,130 --> 00:40:35,350 How do you do? 579 00:40:35,640 --> 00:40:37,510 And how are you, darling girl? 580 00:40:39,810 --> 00:40:42,980 How's that pony of yours, Topper? 581 00:40:43,270 --> 00:40:45,240 He's been dead for 30 years, Daddy. 582 00:40:45,480 --> 00:40:48,480 Really? Oh, how sad. 583 00:40:48,780 --> 00:40:50,740 Oh, I am sorry. 584 00:40:50,990 --> 00:40:53,080 Well, look. Do come on in. 585 00:40:53,360 --> 00:40:54,960 Come in. 586 00:41:00,240 --> 00:41:02,210 Mary's sliced the Battenberg 587 00:41:02,500 --> 00:41:05,420 and put the kettle on for tea. 588 00:41:05,670 --> 00:41:08,220 Or would you prefer something stronger? 589 00:41:09,840 --> 00:41:11,340 Thou must be over the yard arm somewhere or other. 590 00:41:11,630 --> 00:41:13,800 Tea would be fine. 591 00:41:17,970 --> 00:41:21,690 You'll have to forgive the clutter. The cleaning lady's on hols 592 00:41:21,980 --> 00:41:24,400 and Mary's not too au fait 593 00:41:24,690 --> 00:41:26,440 with the old vacuum cleaner. 594 00:41:39,740 --> 00:41:42,960 Oh, Jennifer, how good of you to come. 595 00:41:43,250 --> 00:41:44,870 Selina, Mummy. 596 00:41:45,160 --> 00:41:48,890 Oh, no, of course. And is this your husband? 597 00:41:49,170 --> 00:41:52,300 This is John Barnaby, the new chief rozzer in Causton. 598 00:41:52,590 --> 00:41:54,970 Oh, really? How nice. 599 00:41:55,260 --> 00:41:57,140 Urn, and where were you before? 600 00:41:57,390 --> 00:41:59,390 Brighton. 601 00:41:59,680 --> 00:42:02,770 Mods and rockers. How nice. 602 00:42:03,060 --> 00:42:06,190 Please, all of you, do sit down. 603 00:42:09,060 --> 00:42:11,530 So, Chief Inspector, 604 00:42:11,820 --> 00:42:15,570 I'm sure this wasn't entirely a social call. 605 00:42:15,860 --> 00:42:19,490 Oh, you are so impatient, William. 606 00:42:20,660 --> 00:42:23,630 A fellow at the Social Security department, Gerry Dawkins, 607 00:42:23,910 --> 00:42:27,170 happened to mention to us that you haven't been taking the benefits 608 00:42:27,460 --> 00:42:31,010 - to which you're entitled. - Dawkins. 609 00:42:31,250 --> 00:42:33,470 No, I was in the army with a Dawkins. 610 00:42:33,710 --> 00:42:35,260 Yorkshire chap. 611 00:42:35,550 --> 00:42:38,720 Now, um, are you a milk-in-first man? 612 00:42:39,010 --> 00:42:40,600 - I do hope so. - Thank you. 613 00:42:40,890 --> 00:42:44,020 Milk in first would be fine. 614 00:42:44,310 --> 00:42:46,650 I gather you suffered rather a tragic 615 00:42:46,930 --> 00:42:48,560 family accident some years back. 616 00:42:52,270 --> 00:42:55,620 Do you shoot? Or are you a hunting fellow? 617 00:42:55,900 --> 00:42:58,780 Hmm. Or fishing? 618 00:42:59,070 --> 00:43:00,570 Well, I like fishing. 619 00:43:07,620 --> 00:43:09,370 It's been very nice meeting you, sir. 620 00:43:09,620 --> 00:43:11,720 Anytime, anytime. 621 00:43:11,960 --> 00:43:14,550 And Mrs Bingham, thank you for the tea. 622 00:43:14,840 --> 00:43:18,060 You must come again. I would so like to talk further with you. 623 00:43:18,300 --> 00:43:20,140 - I'd enjoy that. - Please. 624 00:43:20,430 --> 00:43:23,020 Yes, yes. Please, let the poor man go now. 625 00:43:26,390 --> 00:43:28,730 I warned you. 626 00:43:29,020 --> 00:43:31,150 So, what did happen all those years ago? 627 00:43:31,440 --> 00:43:32,940 I was only eight at the time. 628 00:43:33,230 --> 00:43:35,580 My elder brother and sister were in a speeding car 629 00:43:35,860 --> 00:43:38,530 that ended up in the river where they both drowned. 630 00:43:38,820 --> 00:43:40,370 - I'm sorry. - Yes. 631 00:43:40,660 --> 00:43:42,750 They were a lot older than me. 632 00:43:43,030 --> 00:43:45,630 In fact, I think I was an afterthought or a mistake, 633 00:43:45,910 --> 00:43:48,040 knowing those two old dope heads. 634 00:43:48,330 --> 00:43:50,580 I'm sorry? 635 00:43:50,870 --> 00:43:54,470 The sixties. Those two were into everything going. 636 00:43:54,750 --> 00:43:57,630 They seem very, urn, traditional now. 637 00:43:57,920 --> 00:44:00,470 That's not them. They got those old quaint duck characters 638 00:44:00,760 --> 00:44:02,430 from watching the telly. 639 00:44:02,720 --> 00:44:05,940 - Must have been a shock. - Yes, for all of us. 640 00:44:06,220 --> 00:44:08,690 I adored my sister. 641 00:44:08,980 --> 00:44:12,280 Whenever I fell off my pony, Jenny was always there hugging me, 642 00:44:12,520 --> 00:44:14,940 kissing me, wiping away my tears 643 00:44:15,230 --> 00:44:17,230 with a red spotted handkerchief. 644 00:44:17,530 --> 00:44:20,700 - Did it affect you much? - Of course it did. 645 00:44:20,990 --> 00:44:23,040 You don't get to be a bitch like me without good cause. 646 00:44:32,120 --> 00:44:33,630 You haven't had any children together, then? 647 00:44:33,920 --> 00:44:35,590 No, thank you. 648 00:44:35,840 --> 00:44:38,550 Not after what happened to the children in our family. 649 00:44:38,840 --> 00:44:41,180 Besides, Eddie's rubbish in bed, 650 00:44:41,470 --> 00:44:43,220 so it probably wouldn't happen anyway. 651 00:44:45,970 --> 00:44:49,100 Oh, what a beauty! 652 00:44:50,520 --> 00:44:53,240 Excuse me. 653 00:44:54,810 --> 00:44:56,860 Take her to the loose box. I want to have a look at her. 654 00:44:59,730 --> 00:45:03,080 So, how did you get on with the nutters? 655 00:45:04,410 --> 00:45:06,750 Mr and Mrs Bingham were very interesting. 656 00:45:07,030 --> 00:45:10,410 Loafers, all the Binghams. Too much money, not enough graft. 657 00:45:10,660 --> 00:45:12,210 Where did the money come from? 658 00:45:12,500 --> 00:45:14,250 That was old Frank Bingham, way back. 659 00:45:14,540 --> 00:45:18,470 He sold cheap, lousy food to the MoD for the soldiers in World War I. 660 00:45:18,750 --> 00:45:20,720 Made a packet, then set up huge trust funds 661 00:45:21,010 --> 00:45:23,630 they've all lived off ever since. 662 00:45:23,930 --> 00:45:25,520 When do those trusts expire? 663 00:45:25,760 --> 00:45:28,640 When those old loons pop their clogs. 664 00:45:28,930 --> 00:45:30,850 Then Selina inherits the capital 665 00:45:31,100 --> 00:45:33,850 and Eddie Stanton will be laughing all the way to Europe. 666 00:45:35,940 --> 00:45:39,110 - Where were you earlier this afternoon? - Round and about. 667 00:45:39,400 --> 00:45:41,280 Precisely. 668 00:45:41,570 --> 00:45:43,160 I was, uh, with a friend 669 00:45:43,440 --> 00:45:45,660 who I occasionally drop in on. 670 00:45:45,950 --> 00:45:48,040 - You mean a woman. - Yes, of course a woman. 671 00:45:48,280 --> 00:45:51,540 - Could I have her name, please? - No, you couldn't. 672 00:45:51,790 --> 00:45:53,380 I'm a gentleman. 673 00:45:53,620 --> 00:45:56,370 You come up with a charge, I'll answer it. 674 00:45:56,620 --> 00:45:58,970 Meanwhile, toodle-pip. 675 00:46:05,930 --> 00:46:08,470 Oh, Josephine. 676 00:46:13,470 --> 00:46:16,150 John, this is Josephine Parker, my deputy head. 677 00:46:16,440 --> 00:46:18,150 Miss Parker. I was just telling your wife 678 00:46:18,440 --> 00:46:21,190 how wonderful it is to have all this new blood 679 00:46:21,480 --> 00:46:23,280 running everything in Causton these days. 680 00:46:23,570 --> 00:46:26,910 - Can we give you a lift, Miss Parker? - Oh, I'm fine. 681 00:46:27,150 --> 00:46:30,280 Buses have always been good enough for me. Bye. 682 00:46:33,080 --> 00:46:34,950 My new best friend. 683 00:46:39,290 --> 00:46:41,040 William. 684 00:46:43,090 --> 00:46:46,220 Oh, darling. You startled me. 685 00:46:46,510 --> 00:46:48,180 Oh, I'm sorry. 686 00:46:48,470 --> 00:46:51,940 I was just wondering if you'd done anything about dining tonight. 687 00:46:52,180 --> 00:46:55,100 Oh, course. 688 00:46:55,350 --> 00:46:59,020 Rang the Connaught. Had a word with Marcel. 689 00:46:59,310 --> 00:47:03,190 He says that our quatre saisons with extra capers 690 00:47:03,480 --> 00:47:06,910 will be here in two shakes of a vodka martini. 691 00:47:07,190 --> 00:47:09,570 Oh, you are such a man of the world. 692 00:47:09,860 --> 00:47:12,490 And you're a woman of grace and elegance. 693 00:47:12,740 --> 00:47:14,290 We make a splendid couple. 694 00:47:14,540 --> 00:47:16,790 - Quite the talk of the town. - Yes. 695 00:47:20,710 --> 00:47:22,960 - What were you writing? - What? 696 00:47:23,210 --> 00:47:25,510 Oh, nothing, nothing. Bit of this, bit of that. 697 00:47:25,800 --> 00:47:28,770 Snippets of family history. Just trinkets, my love. 698 00:47:33,300 --> 00:47:35,100 Not a vast amount of water in the lungs, 699 00:47:35,390 --> 00:47:37,640 so the first impact as he rolled over 700 00:47:37,930 --> 00:47:39,980 must have knocked him cold, 701 00:47:40,230 --> 00:47:42,230 preventing any gulping of water. 702 00:47:42,520 --> 00:47:45,530 The facial injuries are consistent with being severely bounced 703 00:47:45,780 --> 00:47:47,320 upside down along the river bed. 704 00:47:47,610 --> 00:47:50,580 What about this indentation in the back of the head? 705 00:47:52,620 --> 00:47:54,910 Probably swirled around a bit. I don't know much about canoeing. 706 00:47:55,200 --> 00:47:58,250 Well, in the first place, canoeists usually wear helmets, 707 00:47:58,540 --> 00:48:00,920 and secondly, 708 00:48:01,210 --> 00:48:04,930 they don't go canoeing in their office clothes. 709 00:48:05,210 --> 00:48:07,630 As I say, it's a world I know very little about. 710 00:48:07,920 --> 00:48:10,020 Maybe you should get out more. 711 00:48:29,740 --> 00:48:33,580 I've been down the town hall, and there's no record of Maggie Viviani 712 00:48:33,860 --> 00:48:37,210 prior to the birth of her son Ben. 713 00:48:37,450 --> 00:48:40,050 So why isn't he called Ben Grace? 714 00:48:40,290 --> 00:48:43,340 There's no record of any marriage, only Adam named as father. 715 00:48:43,620 --> 00:48:46,880 - What do we know about him? - He's fully documented and legit. 716 00:48:47,170 --> 00:48:48,670 Supposedly quite a good artist. 717 00:48:48,960 --> 00:48:51,930 - So who's Viviani? - I don't know, sir. 718 00:48:52,220 --> 00:48:53,890 - Did you ask Maggie? - I did. 719 00:48:54,180 --> 00:48:56,800 She said her existence began with herself. 720 00:48:57,050 --> 00:48:58,600 "Before me there was nothing of me." 721 00:48:58,890 --> 00:49:01,270 And what did you say to that? 722 00:49:01,560 --> 00:49:03,560 I told her she had three outstanding parking fines. 723 00:49:05,270 --> 00:49:06,990 - Are you looking for something? - What gave you that idea? 724 00:49:07,270 --> 00:49:08,950 Just a hunch. 725 00:49:09,230 --> 00:49:12,160 I'm looking for case files from 35 years ago. 726 00:49:12,450 --> 00:49:16,080 Anything over ten years old gets sent to the central files warehouse. 727 00:49:17,070 --> 00:49:18,580 Which is where? 728 00:49:18,830 --> 00:49:22,750 - Which is burnt down ten years ago. - I love this place. 729 00:49:23,040 --> 00:49:26,170 If you want to know something from way back, you talk to the local gossips. 730 00:49:26,460 --> 00:49:28,880 So who is the expert on Causton? 731 00:49:30,420 --> 00:49:32,420 Nosey Parker. At the school. 732 00:49:32,670 --> 00:49:35,270 - Real name Josie Parker but... - Yes, yes, I think I know her. 733 00:49:35,510 --> 00:49:38,930 And Bingham country? Who would be the keeper of the gossip over there? 734 00:49:40,850 --> 00:49:43,440 Probably my gran. 735 00:49:43,680 --> 00:49:46,150 - Your gran. - Yeah. 736 00:49:48,900 --> 00:49:51,650 Eddie Stanton claims to have a mistress. 737 00:49:51,940 --> 00:49:54,790 Would your gran happen to know who that poor woman might be? 738 00:49:55,030 --> 00:49:56,530 I'll check. 739 00:49:59,450 --> 00:50:01,080 No, it's fine, Larry. 740 00:50:03,250 --> 00:50:05,500 They were off the planet as usual. Yeah. 741 00:50:05,790 --> 00:50:07,880 Barnaby went on his way none the wiser. 742 00:50:08,170 --> 00:50:11,090 Yeah, yeah, we'll keep an eye on it. 743 00:50:11,380 --> 00:50:13,800 Watching brief. 744 00:50:14,050 --> 00:50:16,430 Nice one, son. Bye-bye. 745 00:50:19,890 --> 00:50:22,610 - Wish I got a hundred grand a time. - We'd still be broke. 746 00:50:22,890 --> 00:50:26,320 Oh, that's very nice. Very charming. Thank you so much. 747 00:50:26,560 --> 00:50:29,190 - Uh, Daddy? - Yes, darling. 748 00:50:29,480 --> 00:50:31,980 I have, um, something to tell you. 749 00:50:32,270 --> 00:50:33,990 Yeah. 750 00:50:34,280 --> 00:50:35,870 I want to get married. 751 00:50:36,110 --> 00:50:39,490 No, I am getting married. 752 00:50:39,740 --> 00:50:42,330 - Who to? - To someone of my own choosing. 753 00:50:42,620 --> 00:50:44,920 And I don't intend to be sent to London 754 00:50:45,200 --> 00:50:48,500 to be sold off to some boring banker. 755 00:50:48,790 --> 00:50:51,260 Well, blimey, darling. That's a bit of a flanker. 756 00:50:51,540 --> 00:50:54,970 So, uh, who is it? Oh, urn, Rupert...? 757 00:50:55,260 --> 00:50:57,260 - No, Charles? - It's Ben. 758 00:50:57,550 --> 00:51:00,850 - Ben... - Ben Viviani. 759 00:51:01,100 --> 00:51:04,470 - What?! - I love him and he loves me. 760 00:51:04,770 --> 00:51:06,610 - Yeah, but... - You want me to be happy, don't you? 761 00:51:06,890 --> 00:51:09,070 - Of course. - And Ben is the best manager 762 00:51:09,350 --> 00:51:11,200 you have ever had? 763 00:51:11,480 --> 00:51:13,200 - I suppose. - So, what's the problem? 764 00:51:13,440 --> 00:51:14,990 Urn, I dunno. 765 00:51:15,280 --> 00:51:17,700 I was just thinking differently for my girl. 766 00:51:17,990 --> 00:51:21,210 But, urn, if you love him. 767 00:51:21,490 --> 00:51:23,290 What do you think, Selina? 768 00:51:27,960 --> 00:51:29,550 You all right, doll? 769 00:51:30,790 --> 00:51:32,540 So sciences have to be double periods 770 00:51:32,790 --> 00:51:35,760 otherwise you waste too much time on the setups. 771 00:51:37,210 --> 00:51:40,140 Oh, hello, darling. You remember Josie Parker, don't you? 772 00:51:40,380 --> 00:51:41,930 Just the person I wanted to see. 773 00:51:45,760 --> 00:51:47,270 So where were the Binghams' children going? 774 00:51:47,560 --> 00:51:50,900 Well, no-one knew but they did have luggage, 775 00:51:51,190 --> 00:51:53,360 quite a lot of luggage, so it wasn't just for a weekend. 776 00:51:53,610 --> 00:51:55,110 How fascinating. 777 00:51:55,400 --> 00:51:57,950 Of course, I only got it from my old Aunt Louisa, 778 00:51:58,240 --> 00:52:00,080 but she got it from old Jonathan Frost, 779 00:52:00,320 --> 00:52:03,250 who was the Binghams' family doctor. 780 00:52:03,530 --> 00:52:05,210 But he intimated to Louisa 781 00:52:05,490 --> 00:52:07,240 that there had been some sort of family row, 782 00:52:07,540 --> 00:52:09,960 and that they were leaving home for good. 783 00:52:10,250 --> 00:52:12,750 - What was the row about? - I don't know. 784 00:52:13,000 --> 00:52:15,340 My Aunt Louisa died before she could pass on the full story. 785 00:52:19,130 --> 00:52:20,630 Sorry. Frog. 786 00:52:27,890 --> 00:52:29,440 Switch her on! 787 00:52:39,610 --> 00:52:43,540 Selina! Oh, this is a nice surprise. 788 00:52:49,700 --> 00:52:52,960 Do I detect a certain hostility in your body language? 789 00:52:59,710 --> 00:53:01,220 Perhaps you'd like to tell me what the problem is 790 00:53:01,510 --> 00:53:03,930 before you eviscerate me. I'd hate to die in ignorance. 791 00:53:04,220 --> 00:53:07,560 Verity wants to marry your son. 792 00:53:07,850 --> 00:53:11,520 - Is this not a cause for celebration? - No, it isn't. 793 00:53:11,810 --> 00:53:15,690 Ben, your dear little son, is my lover. 794 00:53:18,770 --> 00:53:20,400 Oh, my... 795 00:53:23,110 --> 00:53:25,580 - Oh, my... - This wedding is not going to happen. 796 00:53:25,860 --> 00:53:28,240 I just thought I'd tell you that. 797 00:53:28,530 --> 00:53:30,500 Oh, Selina. You don't know what you've done. 798 00:53:30,740 --> 00:53:34,210 One way or another, I am going to stop it. 799 00:53:34,500 --> 00:53:37,500 So smile your way through that one. 800 00:53:39,550 --> 00:53:41,550 - Selina. - What? 801 00:53:44,300 --> 00:53:47,180 If you attempt to interfere, if you even think about it, 802 00:53:47,430 --> 00:53:49,020 I will expose you. 803 00:53:49,260 --> 00:53:52,810 Midsomer's own Mrs Robinson sexually harassing her employees. 804 00:53:53,100 --> 00:53:55,820 You wouldn't do it. You're too nice. 805 00:53:56,100 --> 00:53:58,280 I would and I'm not. 806 00:53:58,560 --> 00:54:00,610 So I suggest you stop waving the kitchenware around, 807 00:54:00,900 --> 00:54:03,370 accept the inevitable and pretend to be happy about it. 808 00:54:04,900 --> 00:54:06,830 You can always find yourself another plaything. 809 00:54:20,960 --> 00:54:22,550 George, I need records. 810 00:54:22,840 --> 00:54:25,680 Ours went up in smoke, but people do not die in horrendous accidents 811 00:54:25,970 --> 00:54:29,560 without medical reports being filed all over the place. 812 00:54:29,850 --> 00:54:32,600 I'm not getting shirty, I'm getting efficient. 813 00:54:32,890 --> 00:54:35,860 An investigation cannot function on gossip alone. 814 00:54:37,560 --> 00:54:40,060 Good. Thank you. An obvious place to look. 815 00:54:40,310 --> 00:54:42,780 I'll see you there at 11:00. Bye, George. 816 00:54:43,070 --> 00:54:44,610 You gone off gossip? 817 00:54:44,900 --> 00:54:47,910 I think it should occasionally be seasoned with hard facts. 818 00:54:48,160 --> 00:54:50,530 You're not going to like this, then. 819 00:54:52,620 --> 00:54:55,210 - What about her? - She's Eddie Stanton's fancy woman. 820 00:54:55,500 --> 00:54:58,420 - Don't be ridiculous. - That's what I said but my Gran insisted. 821 00:54:58,670 --> 00:55:02,090 Said she'd seen him going in there. Regularly. With her own eyes. 822 00:55:02,340 --> 00:55:06,090 - How are her eyes? - Sharp as a ferret's. 823 00:55:10,840 --> 00:55:12,770 Morning. 824 00:55:13,010 --> 00:55:14,520 You found it. 825 00:55:14,810 --> 00:55:18,610 I'm not saying they will be there, but if they still exist, 826 00:55:18,890 --> 00:55:20,490 this is where you'll find them. 827 00:55:20,770 --> 00:55:22,740 Very cavalier attitude towards records round here. 828 00:55:23,020 --> 00:55:25,450 No wonder Gerry Dawkins was driven insane. 829 00:55:25,730 --> 00:55:28,610 - I can't go down there myself. - What? 830 00:55:28,860 --> 00:55:31,410 The dust. It gets on my lungs. 831 00:55:31,700 --> 00:55:35,290 I suggest you use one of these. 832 00:55:35,540 --> 00:55:38,790 - Can't you use one? - No, they're pretty useless. 833 00:55:39,040 --> 00:55:41,420 Dr Williams to reception, please. Dr Williams. 834 00:55:52,300 --> 00:55:54,400 Barnaby. 835 00:55:54,640 --> 00:55:56,140 Mrs Bingham. How can I help you? 836 00:55:56,430 --> 00:55:59,980 I want to tell you all about life 837 00:56:00,230 --> 00:56:02,070 in Midsomer Parva. 838 00:56:02,350 --> 00:56:05,150 I want you to come to tea. 839 00:56:05,400 --> 00:56:07,990 This afternoon. 840 00:56:08,280 --> 00:56:10,910 - I'd be delighted. - Four o'clock. 841 00:56:11,200 --> 00:56:14,790 I'll be there. Bye, Mrs Bingham. 842 00:56:23,670 --> 00:56:25,510 Found anything? 843 00:56:25,750 --> 00:56:28,350 Mm. Coroner's report into the death of the young Binghams. 844 00:56:28,590 --> 00:56:31,060 Robin and Jennifer. 845 00:56:31,340 --> 00:56:35,190 Verdict, accidental death. What's interesting there? 846 00:56:35,470 --> 00:56:39,020 - I don't know. - "Death". Singular. 847 00:56:39,270 --> 00:56:43,150 Autopsy report on only one body: Robin's. 848 00:56:43,440 --> 00:56:45,740 - Jennifer, open verdict. - Why? 849 00:56:46,020 --> 00:56:49,700 Because Jennifer's body was never found. 850 00:56:51,570 --> 00:56:53,660 Yeah, well, it's understandable. 851 00:56:53,950 --> 00:56:55,750 No. No, it isn't. 852 00:56:56,030 --> 00:56:57,710 Bodies do not disappear in a river 853 00:56:57,990 --> 00:57:00,040 unless it's a wide estuary running out to sea. 854 00:57:00,290 --> 00:57:02,380 Bodies bloat and float, 855 00:57:02,620 --> 00:57:05,000 or divers find them wedged under tree roots. 856 00:57:05,290 --> 00:57:06,970 They do not disappear 857 00:57:07,250 --> 00:57:09,470 in small rivers. 858 00:57:14,930 --> 00:57:17,980 I'm missing something. Something really obvious which is on the edge of my mind. 859 00:57:18,260 --> 00:57:21,770 - We better have a case review, then. - Yes, yes. 860 00:57:22,060 --> 00:57:24,980 Oh, dear! Thick as two planks. 861 00:57:25,270 --> 00:57:28,150 Look! Hospital, doctors. Nosey Parker! 862 00:57:28,440 --> 00:57:30,990 Of course I only got it from my old Aunt Louisa, 863 00:57:31,280 --> 00:57:33,320 but she got it from old Jonathan Frost, 864 00:57:33,610 --> 00:57:35,610 who was the Bingham's family doctor. 865 00:57:35,910 --> 00:57:38,280 Jonathan Frost. Ring any local bells? 866 00:57:38,580 --> 00:57:41,580 - From way back, yeah. - Good. Find out if he's still alive. 867 00:57:41,870 --> 00:57:45,420 And if he is, see what you can get out of him re. the Bingham story. 868 00:57:45,670 --> 00:57:47,420 What about patient confidentiality? 869 00:57:47,670 --> 00:57:49,220 Jones, think laterally. 870 00:57:51,250 --> 00:57:53,220 - That's what DCI Barnaby used to say. - Yes, yes, yes. 871 00:57:53,510 --> 00:57:55,310 We got it from our uncle. 872 00:57:55,590 --> 00:57:57,440 Uh, where will you be? 873 00:57:57,720 --> 00:57:59,560 Checking out a scarlet woman. 874 00:57:59,850 --> 00:58:01,520 - Give her my number. - That's your problem, Jones. 875 00:58:01,810 --> 00:58:04,400 You come across as desperate. 876 00:58:04,690 --> 00:58:06,730 Thanks for that, sir. 877 00:58:16,530 --> 00:58:19,960 Mr Barnaby! ls anything wrong? 878 00:58:20,240 --> 00:58:22,670 No, no. Just passing. Wondered if I could have a word? 879 00:58:29,170 --> 00:58:31,220 Of course, I do understand. 880 00:58:31,500 --> 00:58:33,800 What with you being new here. 881 00:58:34,090 --> 00:58:35,810 Along with your wife. 882 00:58:36,050 --> 00:58:38,800 I suppose you need someone to tell you what's been happening here 883 00:58:39,050 --> 00:58:42,730 for the many, many years before you both arrived. 884 00:58:43,020 --> 00:58:45,110 So how can I help you? 885 00:58:45,390 --> 00:58:48,770 Well, it might be interesting if you told me a bit about yourself first. 886 00:58:49,060 --> 00:58:51,160 Really? 887 00:58:51,440 --> 00:58:53,490 Well, what would you like to know? 888 00:58:53,730 --> 00:58:56,280 Urn, have you ever been married? 889 00:58:56,570 --> 00:58:58,540 No. 890 00:58:58,820 --> 00:59:02,750 - Had offers of course. - Of course. But no children. 891 00:59:03,040 --> 00:59:04,580 I think the answer to that 892 00:59:04,870 --> 00:59:07,210 is the natural corollary to your previous question. 893 00:59:07,460 --> 00:59:09,000 Yes, of course. 894 00:59:09,250 --> 00:59:11,590 But you know, modern times. Never can tell. 895 00:59:11,880 --> 00:59:15,720 Maybe in your Brighton, but in Midsomer, 896 00:59:16,010 --> 00:59:19,140 deputy head teachers do not have children out of wedlock. 897 00:59:19,430 --> 00:59:22,770 Right. And how about, urn, 898 00:59:23,060 --> 00:59:24,680 friends? 899 00:59:25,930 --> 00:59:28,690 Mr Barnaby, exactly what are you asking here? 900 00:59:28,940 --> 00:59:32,310 What is your relationship with Eddie Stanton? 901 00:59:32,560 --> 00:59:34,070 And what business is that of yours? 902 00:59:34,360 --> 00:59:37,360 I am a police officer investigating a murder. 903 00:59:37,650 --> 00:59:41,030 Did Mr Stanton spend part of yesterday afternoon here with you? 904 00:59:41,320 --> 00:59:43,830 Yes, he did. 905 00:59:44,080 --> 00:59:45,670 He always comes round on Wednesday afternoons. 906 00:59:45,950 --> 00:59:49,210 - Regular as clockwork. - I see. 907 00:59:49,460 --> 00:59:52,010 I don't think you see at all. 908 00:59:52,250 --> 00:59:53,750 No? 909 00:59:54,040 --> 00:59:56,510 There is nothing untoward in our relationship. 910 00:59:59,510 --> 01:00:02,010 Did he 911 01:00:02,300 --> 01:00:04,100 suggest otherwise? 912 01:00:04,390 --> 01:00:07,060 He implied you were his mistress. 913 01:00:07,310 --> 01:00:09,900 Mistress! Me? 914 01:00:12,020 --> 01:00:14,990 As if I'd have anything to do with such a common little oik. 915 01:00:15,270 --> 01:00:17,820 So why was he here? 916 01:00:18,110 --> 01:00:19,740 I am his book keeper. 917 01:00:20,030 --> 01:00:21,620 - Book keeper. - Yes, I... 918 01:00:21,910 --> 01:00:25,750 I keep track of his actual financial peregrinations, 919 01:00:25,990 --> 01:00:27,790 which he then passes on to his accountant. 920 01:00:28,080 --> 01:00:30,420 I suspect with his own colourful amendments. 921 01:00:30,660 --> 01:00:32,340 He's on the fiddle? 922 01:00:32,620 --> 01:00:35,170 He's the whole damn string section. 923 01:00:35,460 --> 01:00:38,430 And now I suppose I'm compromised. 924 01:00:38,670 --> 01:00:42,390 - You haven't done anything illegal. - But I hold a position of trust. 925 01:00:44,260 --> 01:00:46,430 Here. Have these. 926 01:00:46,680 --> 01:00:49,100 They're a present for you and your wife. 927 01:00:49,350 --> 01:00:51,980 Welcome to Midsomer. 928 01:00:52,270 --> 01:00:55,190 What you have to understand, Mr Barnaby, is the morality of the time. 929 01:00:55,480 --> 01:00:58,700 I mean, our parents were really Edwardians. 930 01:00:58,980 --> 01:01:01,160 Social evolution was delayed 931 01:01:01,440 --> 01:01:03,620 by two world wars, 932 01:01:03,860 --> 01:01:07,330 so when the young, us... Oh. 933 01:01:08,790 --> 01:01:12,130 Eventually broke free, I suppose we did go a little wild, 934 01:01:12,410 --> 01:01:15,760 crossed certain boundaries, defied the old gods 935 01:01:16,040 --> 01:01:19,260 and replaced them with... 936 01:01:19,550 --> 01:01:21,800 What did we replace them with? 937 01:01:23,880 --> 01:01:26,730 Not a lot. 938 01:01:27,010 --> 01:01:29,140 Nothing at all. 939 01:01:30,390 --> 01:01:34,320 Ah, my babies, my children. 940 01:01:34,560 --> 01:01:37,940 I am so very sorry. 941 01:01:38,230 --> 01:01:41,330 I can't give you back your lost years, 942 01:01:41,570 --> 01:01:43,910 your lost lives, 943 01:01:44,200 --> 01:01:48,080 but maybe I can make some small amends. 944 01:01:52,160 --> 01:01:53,960 Is that you, William? 945 01:01:56,750 --> 01:01:58,750 Mr Barnaby? 946 01:01:59,040 --> 01:02:02,050 Oh, who is it, please? 947 01:02:04,050 --> 01:02:06,680 Oh, do speak out. 948 01:02:06,930 --> 01:02:09,520 My eyesight isn't very good but my... 949 01:02:09,760 --> 01:02:11,270 My hearing is excellent. 950 01:02:42,250 --> 01:02:44,760 He is sitting over there by the river. 951 01:02:54,310 --> 01:02:55,900 Dr Frost? 952 01:02:58,730 --> 01:03:00,230 Yes? 953 01:03:06,490 --> 01:03:08,280 That's all right, I've had breakfast. 954 01:03:17,290 --> 01:03:20,840 Uh, doctor said that I'd picked up some passing virus. 955 01:03:21,130 --> 01:03:23,000 - That's why I was sick. - Oh, right. 956 01:03:23,300 --> 01:03:25,010 But I'm better now, 957 01:03:25,300 --> 01:03:28,720 and I just want to congratulate you on your engagement. 958 01:03:30,840 --> 01:03:32,970 Thank you. 959 01:03:33,260 --> 01:03:35,190 And Ben... 960 01:03:35,470 --> 01:03:37,270 welcome to the family. 961 01:03:37,520 --> 01:03:39,020 Thanks. 962 01:03:39,310 --> 01:03:41,150 Give me a kiss, then. 963 01:03:47,240 --> 01:03:49,410 I hope you're both very happy. 964 01:03:53,870 --> 01:03:55,790 Scary. 965 01:04:00,540 --> 01:04:03,010 The river Styx, Mr Jones. 966 01:04:03,290 --> 01:04:05,390 The river you cross on the way to Hades. 967 01:04:07,420 --> 01:04:09,930 Very close, isn't it? 968 01:04:10,220 --> 01:04:12,390 The younger Binghams, sir? 969 01:04:12,640 --> 01:04:14,180 I can't tell you. 970 01:04:14,430 --> 01:04:16,600 Doctor-patient confidentiality. 971 01:04:16,890 --> 01:04:18,940 They are both dead, sir. 972 01:04:19,230 --> 01:04:22,230 But their parents aren't. 973 01:04:22,520 --> 01:04:24,990 The thing is, sir, it's very difficult to get 974 01:04:25,230 --> 01:04:27,330 all the pieces of the jigsaw together 975 01:04:27,610 --> 01:04:30,780 and work out where we are on this one. 976 01:04:31,070 --> 01:04:34,620 The elder Binghams are a bit off the air these days. 977 01:04:34,910 --> 01:04:38,630 Of course they are. Have been for years. 978 01:04:38,910 --> 01:04:41,340 Not surprising after what they got up to. 979 01:04:59,970 --> 01:05:02,900 Ah, the shooting fellow. 980 01:05:03,190 --> 01:05:06,030 Ah, Mary's expecting you. Come in, come in. 981 01:05:06,270 --> 01:05:08,570 Do you play cricket? 982 01:05:08,860 --> 01:05:12,450 - I do, sir. - Excellent. I'll have a word with the skip. 983 01:05:12,740 --> 01:05:15,660 Might be able to fit you in. Hm? 984 01:05:20,620 --> 01:05:24,170 Look, just wanted to warn you that Mary's not quite as sharp 985 01:05:24,460 --> 01:05:27,380 as she once was, so you'll have to take what she says 986 01:05:27,630 --> 01:05:30,180 with a good pinch of salt. Hm? 987 01:05:30,460 --> 01:05:33,760 - I'll bear that in mind, sir. - Mary! Mary! 988 01:05:35,470 --> 01:05:38,060 Oh, she doesn't seem to be here. 989 01:05:38,350 --> 01:05:40,600 Oh, I'll just go and chase her up. 990 01:05:41,720 --> 01:05:44,850 She was here. Mary! 991 01:05:59,530 --> 01:06:01,250 Mary! 992 01:06:04,660 --> 01:06:06,260 Mary! 993 01:06:12,670 --> 01:06:16,550 Okay, is she? All tickety boo? 994 01:06:22,310 --> 01:06:25,280 I think maybe murder could transcend 995 01:06:25,560 --> 01:06:28,110 your loyalty to dead patients, Doctor. 996 01:06:28,350 --> 01:06:31,030 So you're rewriting our code of ethics now, are you? 997 01:06:31,320 --> 01:06:33,410 Gerry Dawkins... 998 01:06:33,690 --> 01:06:35,290 Dawkins was a pain in the arse! 999 01:06:35,530 --> 01:06:37,330 You knew him? 1000 01:06:37,610 --> 01:06:41,120 He was here last week asking the same questions as you. 1001 01:06:43,370 --> 01:06:46,370 Okay, okay... 1002 01:06:46,620 --> 01:06:48,130 Let me put it this way. 1003 01:06:48,420 --> 01:06:51,010 If I go back to my governor with no information, 1004 01:06:51,290 --> 01:06:54,920 I could have a severe career dip. 1005 01:06:55,220 --> 01:06:58,590 Self interest. I love it! 1006 01:06:58,890 --> 01:07:00,600 Well, at least it's honest. 1007 01:07:00,890 --> 01:07:03,770 So why were the Bingham children leaving home? 1008 01:07:07,190 --> 01:07:09,610 I will proffer nothing, 1009 01:07:09,900 --> 01:07:11,990 but I will listen to speculation. 1010 01:07:14,860 --> 01:07:17,740 Okay, okay... 1011 01:07:18,030 --> 01:07:21,500 Uh, money scandal? Gambling debts? 1012 01:07:21,740 --> 01:07:24,160 Uh, drugs? Robin was dealing? 1013 01:07:25,540 --> 01:07:29,420 Uh, Jennifer. Jennifer was pregnant? 1014 01:07:33,250 --> 01:07:34,760 Who by? 1015 01:07:39,430 --> 01:07:41,430 Was it someone local? 1016 01:07:41,720 --> 01:07:44,440 You'd better answer the wretched thing, then. 1017 01:07:46,430 --> 01:07:48,310 What?! 1018 01:08:02,120 --> 01:08:03,710 Heart attack. 1019 01:08:03,950 --> 01:08:06,370 Excuse me? Mountain of newspapers falling on her? 1020 01:08:06,620 --> 01:08:09,670 Was not what she actually died from. Could've triggered it. 1021 01:08:09,960 --> 01:08:12,680 So an induced heart attack. Someone pushed the papers on top of her. 1022 01:08:12,960 --> 01:08:16,180 Or she pulled them herself. Accidents do happen, you know. 1023 01:08:16,460 --> 01:08:19,840 - So you keep telling me. - Yes, I kept telling her. 1024 01:08:20,130 --> 01:08:22,730 - I kept telling her. - What did you tell her, sir? 1025 01:08:23,010 --> 01:08:26,230 Well, just because you've got someone coming to tea, 1026 01:08:26,510 --> 01:08:28,890 doesn't mean you have to go mad with the tidying up. 1027 01:08:31,440 --> 01:08:33,360 She was very house proud, you see. 1028 01:08:33,650 --> 01:08:35,870 Yes, come on, Daddy, you come with us now. 1029 01:08:36,150 --> 01:08:38,120 She'll be all right. 1030 01:08:38,400 --> 01:08:42,250 Bit of a breather and she'll be right back on form. 1031 01:08:42,530 --> 01:08:44,910 - No, Mary's a good 'un. - Yes, come on. 1032 01:08:48,330 --> 01:08:50,670 Jones, where have you been? 1033 01:08:50,960 --> 01:08:53,130 I was on the verge of getting some vital information 1034 01:08:53,420 --> 01:08:55,840 when I was interrupted by my commanding officer. 1035 01:08:59,760 --> 01:09:02,480 So what did you learn before this interruption? 1036 01:09:02,760 --> 01:09:04,480 That Jennifer was pregnant and that's probably 1037 01:09:04,760 --> 01:09:06,680 why she was thrown out the family home. 1038 01:09:06,970 --> 01:09:09,520 Bit extreme. 1039 01:09:09,810 --> 01:09:11,980 And who was the father, and why was the son kicked out as well? 1040 01:09:12,270 --> 01:09:15,860 I don't know. Dr Frost went off in a huff when my phone went. 1041 01:09:16,150 --> 01:09:18,650 Maybe you should switch your phone off while you're doing interviews. 1042 01:09:18,940 --> 01:09:21,070 There was a directive to that effect about five years ago. 1043 01:09:21,360 --> 01:09:24,040 Pardon me for missing it! 1044 01:09:25,200 --> 01:09:27,750 What's this? 1045 01:09:31,620 --> 01:09:33,120 Map reference? 1046 01:09:37,590 --> 01:09:39,510 Somewhere in the middle of Borneo. 1047 01:09:39,800 --> 01:09:42,390 Little outside our parish. 1048 01:09:42,670 --> 01:09:46,550 Or, according to this, a sequence of places in space. 1049 01:09:53,730 --> 01:09:56,280 Precede the map refs with the word "moon". 1050 01:10:03,070 --> 01:10:06,660 Whoa. Jackpot. 1051 01:10:07,990 --> 01:10:10,740 Moon crater names and that reference 1052 01:10:11,040 --> 01:10:13,290 is a crater called "Bingham". 1053 01:10:13,580 --> 01:10:15,630 They've got a moon crater named after them? 1054 01:10:16,750 --> 01:10:18,750 No. After Hiram J. Bingham. 1055 01:10:19,040 --> 01:10:21,220 "An American explorer who discovered 1056 01:10:21,500 --> 01:10:24,130 the Inca capital of Machu Picchu in 1911." 1057 01:10:24,420 --> 01:10:25,970 I don't get it. 1058 01:10:26,260 --> 01:10:29,230 It's a link between two deaths so there must be something. 1059 01:10:29,510 --> 01:10:31,860 Check the rest of the crater names. 1060 01:10:33,850 --> 01:10:35,400 There's hundreds of them. 1061 01:10:35,690 --> 01:10:38,990 Try these first. I'm going to see your Dr Frost. 1062 01:10:42,690 --> 01:10:44,690 "You failed, Jones, so I'm going to have to do it for you." 1063 01:10:44,940 --> 01:10:47,870 "Thanks, Superman, what would we do without you?" 1064 01:11:01,630 --> 01:11:04,220 - How long ago? - Within the hour. 1065 01:11:04,510 --> 01:11:06,600 I'm sorry. Did you tell him I was coming? 1066 01:11:06,880 --> 01:11:08,930 I went to tell him but he had already passed. 1067 01:11:09,220 --> 01:11:11,560 He had a visitor earlier. One of yours, I believe. 1068 01:11:11,850 --> 01:11:15,230 Then he went for a lie down after lunch and slipped gently away. 1069 01:11:15,480 --> 01:11:17,270 Not a bad way to go. 1070 01:11:23,110 --> 01:11:25,080 Thing is, doctor, 1071 01:11:25,320 --> 01:11:28,570 I have this idea that could stitch this one together, 1072 01:11:30,910 --> 01:11:34,750 and I have a funny feeling you know what I'm talking about. 1073 01:11:40,330 --> 01:11:44,210 Being a meticulous sort of person, 1074 01:11:44,500 --> 01:11:47,430 I hope you wrote it all down for me. 1075 01:11:56,180 --> 01:11:57,980 Could save a lot of time. 1076 01:12:09,860 --> 01:12:12,460 No, no, no, no, no, no. I'm sorry, I've had enough of all this. 1077 01:12:12,700 --> 01:12:16,290 No more questions, no more bollocks. I'm calling my lawyer. 1078 01:12:16,580 --> 01:12:20,300 Good. I wanted to see Mr Fletcher again. 1079 01:12:20,540 --> 01:12:22,130 What's happening? 1080 01:12:24,380 --> 01:12:26,800 Yeah, Larry. Yeah, get yourself over here. 1081 01:12:28,010 --> 01:12:29,970 You got it. The new boy. 1082 01:12:31,720 --> 01:12:33,810 - He's on his way. - Good. 1083 01:12:39,180 --> 01:12:40,690 - Hello, everyone. - What's she doing here? 1084 01:12:40,980 --> 01:12:43,780 God knows, Selina. What are any of us doing here? 1085 01:12:44,060 --> 01:12:47,070 You are all helping the police with their enquiries. 1086 01:12:47,360 --> 01:12:50,080 - Oh, no, we're not. - Eddie, do shut up. 1087 01:12:50,360 --> 01:12:53,240 - Just get on with it, Inspector. - Thank you. 1088 01:12:53,530 --> 01:12:55,250 Ms Viviani, Mr Grace, good afternoon. 1089 01:12:55,530 --> 01:12:58,000 Good afternoon. What do you want? 1090 01:12:58,240 --> 01:13:01,000 We know why you fail to appear 1091 01:13:01,250 --> 01:13:02,790 on many governmental databases. 1092 01:13:04,380 --> 01:13:05,880 Amaze me. 1093 01:13:06,170 --> 01:13:09,840 Because Viviani is not your real name. 1094 01:13:12,720 --> 01:13:15,940 Give that man a prize. 1095 01:13:16,180 --> 01:13:17,680 Jones. 1096 01:13:17,970 --> 01:13:19,940 Viviani is the name of a crater on the moon, 1097 01:13:20,220 --> 01:13:23,980 named after Vincenzo Viviani, a pupil of Galileo. 1098 01:13:24,230 --> 01:13:25,780 Well, ain't that interesting. 1099 01:13:27,520 --> 01:13:30,030 And the adjoining crater? 1100 01:13:30,320 --> 01:13:32,910 Is called "Bingham". 1101 01:13:33,200 --> 01:13:36,240 Now, there's a coincidence. 1102 01:13:36,530 --> 01:13:39,210 Two proximate families here on earth with the same names 1103 01:13:39,450 --> 01:13:43,380 as two neighbouring craters, somewhat more distant. 1104 01:13:45,960 --> 01:13:49,300 Excuse me, my brain is hurting. What is this crap? 1105 01:13:50,090 --> 01:13:52,970 - Where is your father? - I don't know. 1106 01:13:53,260 --> 01:13:56,560 Talking to the fairies somewhere, up at the big house. Who cares? 1107 01:13:56,840 --> 01:13:58,890 - Jones. - Sir. 1108 01:13:59,180 --> 01:14:01,350 What is going on? 1109 01:14:01,640 --> 01:14:04,390 Let me outline a possible sequence of events that would get us all to this, 1110 01:14:04,640 --> 01:14:07,740 our current map reference. 1111 01:14:07,980 --> 01:14:10,200 1975. 1112 01:14:12,150 --> 01:14:15,910 Young Jennifer Bingham is being banished from the family home for being pregnant. 1113 01:14:18,990 --> 01:14:20,580 What are you doing? 1114 01:14:20,870 --> 01:14:22,870 But her brother, Robin Bingham, drives too fast, 1115 01:14:25,160 --> 01:14:27,710 and the car plunges into the river. 1116 01:14:33,300 --> 01:14:35,390 Yes, and my brother and sister are both killed, 1117 01:14:35,680 --> 01:14:38,720 and my life starts going down the toilet. So what's new? 1118 01:14:39,010 --> 01:14:41,610 Quite a lot, actually. 1119 01:14:44,230 --> 01:14:47,980 Robin doesn't have a chance. He's unconscious. He drowns. 1120 01:14:49,560 --> 01:14:52,530 But Jennifer is a fighter. 1121 01:15:01,200 --> 01:15:02,700 She survives. 1122 01:15:10,290 --> 01:15:12,890 She makes her choice. 1123 01:15:16,220 --> 01:15:18,140 She crosses the river. 1124 01:15:21,890 --> 01:15:23,430 And on the other side, 1125 01:15:23,720 --> 01:15:26,850 a strong young man welcomes her to a new life. 1126 01:15:29,270 --> 01:15:32,370 Adam takes her back to the artists' colony 1127 01:15:32,650 --> 01:15:34,570 where he looks after her. 1128 01:15:34,860 --> 01:15:36,740 And, in due course, 1129 01:15:37,030 --> 01:15:40,910 she has her child, whom she calls "Ben". 1130 01:15:42,620 --> 01:15:46,420 Jennifer Bingham becomes Maggie, 1131 01:15:46,700 --> 01:15:48,420 and adopts the surname "Viviani" 1132 01:15:48,710 --> 01:15:50,330 because she loves astronomy 1133 01:15:50,620 --> 01:15:53,630 and because she knows her moon craters. 1134 01:15:53,920 --> 01:15:57,170 Viviani, next to Bingham. 1135 01:15:58,970 --> 01:16:02,350 You're Jenny? My sister Jenny? 1136 01:16:05,850 --> 01:16:07,900 Sorry, kid. 1137 01:16:09,100 --> 01:16:11,230 But I loved you. 1138 01:16:11,520 --> 01:16:13,190 I loved you. 1139 01:16:16,070 --> 01:16:19,370 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 1140 01:16:24,450 --> 01:16:26,870 Why didn't you tell me you were still alive? 1141 01:16:27,160 --> 01:16:29,710 Because you would have wanted to know everything. 1142 01:16:30,000 --> 01:16:31,970 What everything? What else can there be? 1143 01:16:33,960 --> 01:16:36,430 It was the shame, wasn't it? 1144 01:16:36,710 --> 01:16:38,340 That was what made you hide away. 1145 01:16:40,130 --> 01:16:41,880 What shame? 1146 01:16:42,130 --> 01:16:45,980 Robin, your big brother, was also expelled from the Bingham Camelot. 1147 01:16:46,260 --> 01:16:48,060 Why was that? 1148 01:16:48,350 --> 01:16:50,980 - Come on. Tell me. Why? - Work it out, child. 1149 01:16:52,310 --> 01:16:54,690 Well, after the 60's, nobody got chucked out 1150 01:16:54,980 --> 01:16:56,730 for being unmarried and pregnant. 1151 01:17:00,070 --> 01:17:03,570 But getting pregnant by your brother... 1152 01:17:10,160 --> 01:17:14,010 Well, even for our pothead parents, that was a bit beyond the pale. 1153 01:17:14,290 --> 01:17:17,800 - Brother. - I love this family. 1154 01:17:18,090 --> 01:17:20,340 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 1155 01:17:20,630 --> 01:17:22,680 And you still had plans, didn't you, Maggie? 1156 01:17:22,930 --> 01:17:24,430 What plans? 1157 01:17:24,680 --> 01:17:26,220 Well, you might have lost the farm 1158 01:17:26,470 --> 01:17:28,470 but maybe Ben could win it back for you. 1159 01:17:28,760 --> 01:17:30,310 You taught him all you knew about horses, 1160 01:17:30,600 --> 01:17:33,020 you insinuated him into his job here, 1161 01:17:33,310 --> 01:17:36,190 and no doubt encouraged his courtship of Verity so that one day, 1162 01:17:36,480 --> 01:17:40,410 if they married, the Bingham estate might revert to its rightful heirs. 1163 01:17:41,860 --> 01:17:45,710 - Mum? - No! That's... 1164 01:17:47,740 --> 01:17:51,340 Well, maybe a bit. Subconsciously. 1165 01:17:51,620 --> 01:17:54,870 A mother being ambitious for her child. What's so wrong with that? 1166 01:17:55,170 --> 01:17:57,720 Hi, everyone. How's it all going? 1167 01:17:58,000 --> 01:18:01,350 You shut up. Keep digging, Barnaby. 1168 01:18:01,630 --> 01:18:04,350 Then up pops Gerry Dawkins 1169 01:18:04,630 --> 01:18:07,260 who has discovered Maggie's true identity. 1170 01:18:07,550 --> 01:18:10,520 I have something important to relate 1171 01:18:10,810 --> 01:18:12,810 regarding our ongoing investigation. 1172 01:18:13,060 --> 01:18:14,650 Just a minute, Sherlock. 1173 01:18:14,940 --> 01:18:16,480 I had nothing to do with that. 1174 01:18:16,730 --> 01:18:19,950 Then poor Mary Bingham decides it's time 1175 01:18:20,230 --> 01:18:23,030 she unburdened herself of the truth. 1176 01:18:23,320 --> 01:18:24,990 She asked to talk to me. 1177 01:18:25,240 --> 01:18:28,490 You must come again. I would so like to talk further with you. 1178 01:18:28,740 --> 01:18:31,670 - I'd enjoy that. - Please. 1179 01:18:31,910 --> 01:18:34,960 Yes, yes. Thank you. Let the poor man go now. 1180 01:18:38,210 --> 01:18:41,260 - Well, I didn't know that. - No. 1181 01:18:41,550 --> 01:18:45,140 No, you didn't. But someone did. 1182 01:18:47,010 --> 01:18:49,930 - Me? - If your mother told the whole story, 1183 01:18:50,220 --> 01:18:51,940 how would that affect your standing in the community? 1184 01:18:52,220 --> 01:18:55,480 The hunt, the golf club? Could be a lot of doors closing. 1185 01:18:55,770 --> 01:18:58,860 - But, I didn't... - But you didn't know the full story. 1186 01:18:59,100 --> 01:19:01,230 That was obvious from your behaviour just now. 1187 01:19:01,520 --> 01:19:03,490 No. No. Right. I didn't know anything. 1188 01:19:03,780 --> 01:19:07,370 If I may step in here as the family's legal representative... 1189 01:19:07,610 --> 01:19:09,830 And the trustee of the Bingham estate. 1190 01:19:10,120 --> 01:19:11,620 Yes. 1191 01:19:11,910 --> 01:19:14,790 Nice little earner that one? I bet it is. 1192 01:19:15,080 --> 01:19:18,880 So long as no-one looks too closely at how you and Eddie here 1193 01:19:19,170 --> 01:19:22,420 handle the finances of his wife's estate. 1194 01:19:22,710 --> 01:19:25,060 What? What's he talking about? 1195 01:19:25,340 --> 01:19:27,310 Uh, nothing, doll. Nothing. 1196 01:19:31,720 --> 01:19:34,220 I had a chat 1197 01:19:34,470 --> 01:19:36,230 with Josie Parker 1198 01:19:36,480 --> 01:19:38,770 and the local tax office. 1199 01:19:39,060 --> 01:19:40,610 - Look, I would like to say... - Better if you don't say... 1200 01:19:40,900 --> 01:19:42,650 Would you shut up? 1201 01:19:42,940 --> 01:19:45,820 This has nothing to do with anything. 1202 01:19:46,110 --> 01:19:49,610 Just false accounting, is it? Milking the estate? 1203 01:19:49,910 --> 01:19:52,120 Something you'd keep quiet at any cost. 1204 01:19:52,410 --> 01:19:55,130 No, no, no. Look, whatever that is, 1205 01:19:55,410 --> 01:19:59,040 I haven't done anything. Anything. 1206 01:20:00,170 --> 01:20:01,670 Well, not murder. 1207 01:20:01,960 --> 01:20:05,510 One penny out of place and you are so dead. And you. 1208 01:20:07,630 --> 01:20:11,260 Excuse me, but where does all this leave Ben and me? 1209 01:20:11,510 --> 01:20:14,480 Uh, you're fine. Press on with your own lives. 1210 01:20:14,760 --> 01:20:18,110 But aren't we sort of relatives or something? 1211 01:20:18,350 --> 01:20:19,900 There are no blood ties. 1212 01:20:20,190 --> 01:20:22,780 It's not like you're first cousins 1213 01:20:23,060 --> 01:20:25,690 or uncles or aunts or anything. 1214 01:20:31,160 --> 01:20:32,780 You all right, doll? 1215 01:20:33,990 --> 01:20:35,960 Come here, come here, come here, come here. 1216 01:20:36,240 --> 01:20:38,120 Come on. Such a brave girl. 1217 01:20:38,410 --> 01:20:40,460 I've found Bingham, sir. You'd better come. Quickly. 1218 01:20:40,750 --> 01:20:42,970 Don't cry now, be a brave girl. 1219 01:20:46,710 --> 01:20:50,140 No more tears. It's all right. 1220 01:21:17,700 --> 01:21:19,330 Hello, William. 1221 01:21:19,620 --> 01:21:21,870 What ho? 1222 01:21:22,160 --> 01:21:23,840 Ah, it's the shooting fellow, isn't it? 1223 01:21:24,120 --> 01:21:27,720 What are you doing up there? 1224 01:21:28,000 --> 01:21:29,680 Well, you know. 1225 01:21:29,960 --> 01:21:33,220 A little nearer my god to thee. 1226 01:21:35,300 --> 01:21:36,800 Would you mind coming down, please? 1227 01:21:37,100 --> 01:21:40,440 Well, I would, actually. 1228 01:21:40,720 --> 01:21:44,350 You see, I've got this thingummy up here. 1229 01:21:45,600 --> 01:21:47,110 And what's that, William? 1230 01:21:47,400 --> 01:21:49,620 Well, I may have told you, I think... 1231 01:21:50,360 --> 01:21:52,110 - I was in the army, you know? - Yes. 1232 01:21:52,400 --> 01:21:55,910 Not for long. I was one of the last to do national service. 1233 01:21:56,200 --> 01:21:59,370 But they did teach a chap to do one useful thing. 1234 01:21:59,660 --> 01:22:01,330 And what was that? 1235 01:22:01,620 --> 01:22:04,750 Well, how to make big bangs. 1236 01:22:05,040 --> 01:22:06,920 And bomb thingies. 1237 01:22:07,210 --> 01:22:09,010 - Really? - Yes. 1238 01:22:09,290 --> 01:22:12,050 With stuff you could get from the local chemists. 1239 01:22:12,340 --> 01:22:15,260 You know bit of sulphur, potassium permanganate, 1240 01:22:15,550 --> 01:22:17,180 magnesium strip. 1241 01:22:17,470 --> 01:22:20,470 Easy peasy. 1242 01:22:21,810 --> 01:22:24,730 Yeah, I blew up a squash court once. 1243 01:22:24,980 --> 01:22:26,850 And is that what you've got there? 1244 01:22:27,150 --> 01:22:28,690 No, no, no, no. 1245 01:22:28,980 --> 01:22:32,110 - I'm not silly, you know. - Good. 1246 01:22:32,400 --> 01:22:35,030 No. This is just the detonating device. 1247 01:22:35,320 --> 01:22:39,080 Yes, the little bomb's up there in the rafters. See? 1248 01:22:39,320 --> 01:22:41,330 In the custard cream tin. 1249 01:22:41,580 --> 01:22:43,080 Oh, God. 1250 01:22:43,330 --> 01:22:46,920 You can't get them anymore. Good biscuit tins. 1251 01:22:50,380 --> 01:22:53,760 - Back stairs. - He's really flipped this time. 1252 01:22:54,050 --> 01:22:57,680 Mr Stanton, keep everyone well back and call the emergency services. 1253 01:22:57,930 --> 01:22:59,430 I've got a shotgun if you want to bring him down. 1254 01:22:59,680 --> 01:23:01,560 Go. 1255 01:23:05,020 --> 01:23:08,270 Everybody back beyond the drive. 1256 01:23:08,560 --> 01:23:10,740 He's got a bloody bomb in there. 1257 01:23:11,020 --> 01:23:12,900 Oh, my... 1258 01:23:13,190 --> 01:23:15,040 Daddy! Daddy! 1259 01:23:15,320 --> 01:23:16,870 So, William, 1260 01:23:17,150 --> 01:23:19,280 what's the plan? 1261 01:23:19,530 --> 01:23:22,880 Mary's dead, isn't she? 1262 01:23:23,160 --> 01:23:25,960 Yes, I'm afraid so. 1263 01:23:26,210 --> 01:23:29,380 Yes, I knew it at the time, of course. 1264 01:23:29,670 --> 01:23:31,920 But it wasn't sort of going in. 1265 01:23:34,960 --> 01:23:38,060 Anyway, no fun without the old stick, 1266 01:23:38,340 --> 01:23:41,690 so I thought I might go and join her up there. 1267 01:23:41,970 --> 01:23:44,600 And what makes you think you'll be going "up there"? 1268 01:23:44,890 --> 01:23:47,640 Well, why shouldn't I? 1269 01:23:47,940 --> 01:23:50,910 Because I think your God probably knows what you did. 1270 01:23:51,190 --> 01:23:53,030 What did I do? 1271 01:23:53,320 --> 01:23:55,070 You committed two murders, William. 1272 01:23:57,690 --> 01:24:01,040 - Did I? - I think so. 1273 01:24:01,320 --> 01:24:03,920 And why did I do that? 1274 01:24:05,580 --> 01:24:07,250 Guilt, William. 1275 01:24:07,540 --> 01:24:11,130 Deep, coruscating, soul-destroying guilt 1276 01:24:11,420 --> 01:24:14,970 at your behaviour as young parents. 1277 01:24:15,250 --> 01:24:17,760 You and your wife epitomised the free spirit of the age. 1278 01:24:18,050 --> 01:24:21,850 It was all "get out there, have fun, do drugs, do sex, do anything. 1279 01:24:22,090 --> 01:24:24,390 No taboos." 1280 01:24:24,680 --> 01:24:28,560 Yes. The revolution. We were the revolution. 1281 01:24:28,850 --> 01:24:31,650 We were up there on the barricades. 1282 01:24:31,940 --> 01:24:35,610 Marat we're marching on. 1283 01:24:35,900 --> 01:24:39,320 Aux armes, citoyens. 1284 01:24:40,610 --> 01:24:43,540 Formez vos bataillons... 1285 01:24:43,780 --> 01:24:45,460 William. William! 1286 01:24:45,740 --> 01:24:47,790 What? What? 1287 01:24:48,080 --> 01:24:50,210 What happened? 1288 01:24:51,370 --> 01:24:54,420 I don't know. 1289 01:24:54,710 --> 01:24:58,310 You taught your children all about free love, didn't you? 1290 01:24:58,590 --> 01:25:01,970 "Do what you like, kids. It's cool." 1291 01:25:02,260 --> 01:25:04,350 No, no. 1292 01:25:04,640 --> 01:25:07,390 But then Jennifer got pregnant to her own brother 1293 01:25:07,640 --> 01:25:10,480 and the train hit the buffers, didn't it? 1294 01:25:10,770 --> 01:25:13,650 The party was well and truly over. 1295 01:25:13,940 --> 01:25:16,320 You woke up, the smoke cleared, 1296 01:25:16,610 --> 01:25:18,150 you looked around you. 1297 01:25:18,440 --> 01:25:21,410 And what did you and Mary say? 1298 01:25:21,700 --> 01:25:23,370 You said, "We have sinned. 1299 01:25:23,660 --> 01:25:27,130 Dear God, how we have sinned." 1300 01:25:28,870 --> 01:25:30,420 Oh, yes. 1301 01:25:30,660 --> 01:25:34,260 Yes, we had sinned. 1302 01:25:38,050 --> 01:25:41,420 So then you had to cast the devils out. 1303 01:25:41,670 --> 01:25:45,020 You had to banish your children. 1304 01:25:45,300 --> 01:25:46,930 Oh, the God of Abraham. 1305 01:25:47,220 --> 01:25:49,940 Sacrificing Isaac. 1306 01:25:50,180 --> 01:25:52,280 His child. 1307 01:25:53,480 --> 01:25:55,780 Our children. 1308 01:26:01,940 --> 01:26:04,620 So then you withdrew from this life 1309 01:26:04,860 --> 01:26:07,160 to start a life of atonement. 1310 01:26:14,960 --> 01:26:17,130 William. William... 1311 01:26:17,420 --> 01:26:19,890 How did you know your daughter was still alive? 1312 01:26:22,880 --> 01:26:26,140 The horses. 1313 01:26:26,390 --> 01:26:29,690 Jennifer always had a way with horses. 1314 01:26:31,100 --> 01:26:34,350 We heard rumours from across the river. 1315 01:26:37,730 --> 01:26:39,280 Then one day, 1316 01:26:39,560 --> 01:26:42,780 she came here with her son. 1317 01:26:47,070 --> 01:26:50,830 It was 20 years later, but we knew it was her 1318 01:26:51,080 --> 01:26:53,420 and her son. 1319 01:26:53,700 --> 01:26:55,580 No, her nephew. 1320 01:26:55,870 --> 01:26:58,050 No, her son. 1321 01:26:58,330 --> 01:27:00,840 And your grandson. 1322 01:27:01,090 --> 01:27:02,880 Yes. 1323 01:27:03,170 --> 01:27:04,800 So when Ben came to work next door, 1324 01:27:05,090 --> 01:27:06,840 you also saw the chance 1325 01:27:07,090 --> 01:27:09,850 of him one day taking over the estate, 1326 01:27:10,100 --> 01:27:13,470 and maybe helping you and Mary inch towards redemption. 1327 01:27:17,980 --> 01:27:20,200 - Dawkins! - What? 1328 01:27:20,480 --> 01:27:24,330 Gerry Dawkins comes sniffing round. 1329 01:27:24,610 --> 01:27:26,240 He even calls you to tell you that he has 1330 01:27:26,530 --> 01:27:30,200 some earth-shattering news for you regarding your daughter. 1331 01:27:30,490 --> 01:27:32,710 - Right? - Yes. 1332 01:27:32,990 --> 01:27:36,040 You ask him to meet you at the boatsheds. 1333 01:27:46,260 --> 01:27:48,220 You force him into his canoe, 1334 01:27:52,550 --> 01:27:55,270 and hit him in the back of his head. 1335 01:27:56,640 --> 01:28:00,270 Then you push him out into the river 1336 01:28:00,560 --> 01:28:02,860 where he quickly overturns. 1337 01:28:04,480 --> 01:28:07,860 Irritating man. Busybody. He had to go. 1338 01:28:08,150 --> 01:28:10,580 And I'm afraid I do too now. 1339 01:28:10,860 --> 01:28:12,580 No, wait! You can't go yet. 1340 01:28:12,820 --> 01:28:14,870 You haven't finished your confession. 1341 01:28:15,160 --> 01:28:18,380 You don't get absolution without telling all. 1342 01:28:18,660 --> 01:28:20,420 What happened next, William? 1343 01:28:20,670 --> 01:28:23,090 Nothing! Nothing! 1344 01:28:23,380 --> 01:28:25,420 Your dear wife. 1345 01:28:25,710 --> 01:28:27,710 Mary wanted redemption too. 1346 01:28:28,010 --> 01:28:30,810 I want to tell you all about life 1347 01:28:31,050 --> 01:28:32,640 in Midsomer Parva. 1348 01:28:32,930 --> 01:28:34,930 Your wife wanted to confess to me, didn't she? 1349 01:28:35,220 --> 01:28:38,600 I want you to come for tea. Four o'clock. 1350 01:28:38,850 --> 01:28:40,900 But you couldn't have that, could you? 1351 01:28:41,190 --> 01:28:43,440 You wanted to do it your way. 1352 01:28:43,690 --> 01:28:45,740 You had to stop Mary. 1353 01:28:55,780 --> 01:28:59,290 No, I was just sending her on ahead. 1354 01:28:59,540 --> 01:29:02,210 - And I'm sorry. - No! 1355 01:29:02,460 --> 01:29:03,960 But I'm afraid I must join her. 1356 01:29:04,210 --> 01:29:05,710 Jones! 1357 01:29:26,400 --> 01:29:29,120 Do not move. 1358 01:29:29,400 --> 01:29:32,000 I'm okay, I'm okay. 1359 01:29:32,280 --> 01:29:36,080 - Pizza boxes. I love 'em. - Just stay completely still. 1360 01:29:37,530 --> 01:29:39,040 Come on. 1361 01:29:49,920 --> 01:29:52,170 Well... 1362 01:29:52,420 --> 01:29:56,300 Oh, no. 1363 01:29:56,600 --> 01:29:59,020 I'm sorry, William, 1364 01:29:59,310 --> 01:30:02,400 you have to face the judges temporal before those eternal. 1365 01:30:12,820 --> 01:30:15,200 Thank you. 1366 01:30:28,920 --> 01:30:31,640 Oh, it's so nice of you all to drop by. 1367 01:30:33,090 --> 01:30:35,470 Have you come far? 1368 01:31:05,790 --> 01:31:08,460 Thanks, darling. 1369 01:31:08,750 --> 01:31:10,590 Just pop it over there. 1370 01:31:11,960 --> 01:31:13,460 Second honeymoon over, is it? 1371 01:31:13,760 --> 01:31:16,220 Yup. Back to weekends only. 1372 01:31:16,510 --> 01:31:18,930 It is the weekend. 1373 01:31:19,180 --> 01:31:20,680 Well, except this weekend. 1374 01:31:20,970 --> 01:31:24,480 Term starts on Monday. I am on a mission. 1375 01:31:24,770 --> 01:31:26,860 Oh. Right. 1376 01:31:36,650 --> 01:31:38,780 What'll happen to your recluse? 1377 01:31:39,070 --> 01:31:41,920 Unfit to plead. Indefinite custody. 1378 01:31:43,660 --> 01:31:45,750 How's things with your deputy? 1379 01:31:46,040 --> 01:31:48,090 She's retiring. 1380 01:31:48,370 --> 01:31:51,630 Really? Any particular reason? 1381 01:31:51,920 --> 01:31:54,220 - Not that she'd tell me. - Oh, well. 1382 01:31:54,500 --> 01:31:57,720 Probably for the best. 1383 01:31:58,010 --> 01:32:00,980 She said she bumped into you the other day. 1384 01:32:01,220 --> 01:32:04,220 Oh, yes. 1385 01:32:04,510 --> 01:32:06,480 Do you have anything to tell me? 1386 01:32:09,480 --> 01:32:10,980 No. 105545

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