Original subtitles

(CHOMPING)

Hmm.

(BOTH SNORTING)

(GRUNTS)

(BOTH GROANING)

No.

Huh?

(GROWLING)

Meat. Meat.

Meat. Meat.

Meat!

(PANTING)

(SHEEP BLEATING) (ALL GASPING)

Meat. (BLEATING CONTINUES)

That was close.

(ALL GRUNTING)

ALL: Meat!

(ALL GROANING)

You've been chasing ghosts again.

It was different this time, Nums.

What? Where's the baa-baa?

You ate the whole thing?

(GROWLS)

He didn't eat it.

Who then? You? You?

Let me smell your breath. NUMS: Fool!

There was no baa-baa!

It was just a sound, like all the rest.

But we saw this one, Nums.

Oh, really? What color was it? How tall, hmm?

There are no more meat things.

We ate them all!

Which is something I warned you all about.

And now they're gone, aren't they?

Then what makes those sounds?

What makes the grass move?

Ghosts. Ghosts of the meat things we've eaten before.

They haunt us.

(ALL GASPING)

There are no more...

Say it, Nums.

No more baa-baas!

Baa-baas!

(VOICE BREAKING) No more cockle-doos!

Cockle-doos!

No more snort-snorts or moo-moos!

Snort-snorts. Moo-moos.

♪ No more meat, all extinct Look what we've done

♪ Used to eat fleshy treats Now we have none

♪ Cockle-doos, all are through No more moo-moos

♪ Can't get by, losing my mind What can we do? ♪

You see? Look at us.

This is why we don't say "moo-moos" or "cockle-doos"!

Or "pink bellies"?

(BOTH GASPING)

Yes, pink bellies.

Pink bellies!

Ten fleshy fingers.

(ALL SLURPING)

And 10 fleshy toes.

(ALL CHUCKLING)

Tender necks, tasty tummies, meaty legs...

Meaty, tasty pink bellies!

ALL: (CHANTING) Meat! Meat! Meat! Meat!

(SIGHING)

But maybe someday...

Someday soon.

ALISE: Bye! ODETTE: Good-bye!

We love you, Alise!

I love you, too!

Adieu! Adieu!

(CHUCKLES) It's okay, Queen Uberta.

They'll be back by summer's end.

(CRYING)

(SNIFFLES) Yes!

(LAUGHS MANIACALLY)

I don't get it.

Derek and Odette are going to spend the whole summer helping people?

Papa says that's what being a real prince is all about.

Sheesh. What a hippie.

ALISE: Oh, I'm gonna miss them.

So, what's first? Build a fort? Play tag?

Not tag.

I'm sorry, Alise, but General Puffin has a castle to guard.

Ow. (CLEARS THROAT)

As you were.

I wish.

(PANTING)

(WHOOPING)

(BREATHES HEAVILY)

Bad cannon!

Ta-da!

Well done, Bridgit.

Now we've got everything we need for Sailor Boot Camp!

(SQUAWKS)

Sailor Boot Camp!

Alise will be the perfect student.

And to think I've got her to myself all summer! ((LAUGHS)

I can't wait to begin!

But before Alise arrives, a quick review of my sailor proverbs.

"To find a new world, or your way home,

"a sailor must know the stars by heart!"

Stars by heart!

Oh.

A sailor must also know his ropes.

"You may break your ship on a reef

"if you raise the lugsail when you mean to raise the mainsail."

Ha-ha!

Know your ropes!

Know your ropes!

"To avoid becoming a castaway,

"never tie a knot insufficient to the task."

(GASPS)

Ha-ha!

Let Sailor Boot Camp begin!

Let Sailor Boot Camp begin!

"Parrots are optional."

Parrots are... Hey!

You may call for Alise.

QUEEN UBERTA: Alise! (GASPS)

QUEEN UBERTA: Will you come to my chamber please?

What is she up to?

(LORD ROGERS GASPING)

Princess Boot Camp?

No, Alise! It's a trap!

I'm afraid Alise will have to miss your

"Life on a Poop Deck" lecture series.

Sailor Boot Camp! How did you know?

(SNEERING)

(GASPS)

She-devil.

Thief!

Says the man who wants to turn my granddaughter into a pirate!

A pirate? Me?

Let Princess Boot Camp begin.

Oh!

(GRUNTING)

A pirate, she calls me.

Pirate, she calls me!

Do you ever say anything original?

Do you ever say... (SQUAWKING)

(GRUNTING)

(GROANS)

(STRUGGLING)

Whoa! Chamberlain! No! Chamberlain, wait!

I'm sorry, Queen's orders.

Ow!

Ah!

(GRUNTING)

Chamberlain, I demand that you open this door!

(YELLS)

Uberta!

PARROT: Uberta!

(GASPS) Alise, darling! No, no, no, no.

Huh? I thought you said pinky out.

Out, yes. Straight as a dagger, oh, no, no.

(CHUCKLING LIGHTLY)

(EXCLAIMS)

Yes!

(LAUGHING)

(GASPS)

(GROANING)

I think my pinky doesn't want me to be a princess.

It must learn to do its duty

like every other bone in your body.

Granmum, uh, I was kind of thinking about

going swimming today.

(LAUGHING)

No, no, no, no, dear!

No swimming, no leaving my wing of the castle

until you've been properly trained.

Oh...

QUEEN UBERTA: Today... (KNOCK ON WINDOW)

(GASPS) QUEEN UBERTA: ...after pinky positioning,

it's on to proper curtsy technique.

Hi, guys.

Coming for a dip?

(SCOFFS) Yeah, in six weeks maybe.

Six weeks? How many curtsies can a girl do?

Millions, I guess. (QUEEN UBERTA LAUGHING)

Then, it's proper vowel pronunciation,

followed by posture training!

What's next, Chinese water torture?

(GASPS) Shoo!

Out! Incoming!

Geronimo!

Sometimes she gives us royals a bad name.

Now, where were we?

How dare you call me a pirate?

So be it!

It'll take a pirate to save this young lassie

from a fate worse than Davy Jones' Locker!

Not if I make shark bait of ye first, ye seadog!

If you've noticed, me timbers ain't shivering, ye landlubber!

Try me, ye scurvy mutt!

Don't tempt me, ye...

Scallywag!

Thank you. You scallywag!

Ha!

Alise needs adventure!

She'll get all the adventure she can handle

with a tight corset and a pair of ill-fitting shoes!

BRODIE: Have you tested it yet?

SCULLION: Thought I'd let you.

A word, Captain Brodie.

Ugh. Here comes quality control.

At ease. No need to salute.

Oh, we know.

Well, as Secretary of Safety and Surveillance,

I have to ask, where are the improvements to castle security?

Well, I... Well, you said your master trap-makers

would add an extra layer of defense here.

Yes, and... But all I see, quite frankly, are...

(GROANS) (ALARM BLARING)

Oh.

(YELLS)

(GASPS)

(SQUAWKS)

(CLEARS THROAT)

Yes, well, I suppose that will do in a pinch.

Whoo.

All right!

QUEEN UBERTA: General Puffin!

You have allowed Alise to escape the castle!

"Escape," ma'am?

(GASPING)

Whoo-hoo!

(FROLICKING)

You're good.

You will bring her back to my wing,

and then, you will direct our furry friends

to guard the doors until Princess Boot Camp is complete!

Uh, Queen Uberta...

I thought our job was to keep bad guys out, not good girls in.

Or not.

ALISE: Puffin, tell them to put me down.

Oh, I'm sorry, Alise. Orders from your granmum.

But, Puffin, I don't wanna be a "princess" princess.

I wanna be a modern princess.

(SIGHS) My wings are tied, my young friend.

(GRUNTS)

(SIGHS)

Trapped in a castle for six weeks.

It's horrible.

That's nothing!

Imagine being trapped inside a frog's body your whole life.

It disgusts me!

Okay, I'm a little slimy maybe, but...

If Derek and Odette were here, they wouldn't allow this!

And neither will I!

Are you suggesting...

We break her out!

But Puffin and his army of flying brown skunks will just put her back in.

Not if they couldn't find her.

(WIND HOWLING) (WORKER WHIMPERING)

(MUTTERING)

You okay?

It used to take all day to get my taters to market.

No problem.

(CHUCKLES)

Now I'll be able to cross the canyon in five minutes!

(GIGGLES) It's good for all of us.

And to think the Prince and Princess are helping us do the work!

(LAUGHS) Oh, the times are a-changing!

ODETTE: Let me help you with that.

Too bad that fair daughter of yours is missing all the action.

Oh, she's at home having her own adventure, I'm sure.

Next, you're probably asking yourself,

"How should I curtsy to a lord from a foreign country

"who only lives in a medium-sized castle?"

(YAWNS) Not really.

Such a curtsy takes a great deal of practice,

and begins thus.

(GASPS)

(SIZZLES)

(GASPS)

All right, look alive now!

(GASPS)

Phew.

All secure down here, Captain?

General Puffin! Shouldn't you be keeping your eye on that

dangerous little girl?

Yeah. If Alise gets out, she might pick flowers or something.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

Vigilance! Vi-gi-lance!

You want to help poor Alise, right?

Me love Leesie.

Okay, then. When you hear the loud croak,

light these torches as quickly as you can, capisce?

(BRIDGIT WHOOPING)

Best job on Earth! (GRUNTING)

Okay, until then, just...

Me chill.

It's go time.

When do I do my performance? Now?

I'll give you the signal.

Great. You say "action,"

then I will deliver my lines with passion!

Me, may, my, mow!

Shush.

All right. Positions!

Brrr.

Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.

I'm gonna pickle you if you don't get out there.

Oh, I see. You're one of those directors.

Sheesh.

(BOTH GRUNTING)

Oh, what's this? Is Alise's room secure?

Eh. Pretty much.

Except, we let that dragon in.

Oh, yeah. But it was only a wee dragon, little teeth. (CHOMPING)

Vigilance!

(BOTH GRUNTING)

Now?

Whoa, buddy, on the second croak.

"Croak"? Shouldn't we leave croaking to a professional?

(CLEARS THROAT AND CROAKS)

(GASPING)

Yee-ha-ha!

(LAUGHING)

(CROAKS)

Huh. Competition!

(GASPS)

Puffin! Puffin! (GASPS)

Yes, what is it, Jean-Bob?

Invaders! I think.

Ooh.

Oh, Captain Brodie!

(CHEERING)

Well done, Jean-Bob.

Did you see me?

I was, like, "Invaders!" with this kind of face.

I was totally in the moment. "Invaders!" I said, like this.

It was awesome.

It's all about knowing your motivation.

Okay, now...

I could've gone with this or this.

But my inner monolog told me this!

Tell your inner monolog to zip it

and dial down the drama, would you?

We've got a girl to rescue from the clutches

of an insidious queen who's gone mad!

Yeah, okay, we'll dial down the drama a notch.

(LORD ROGERS COUGHS)

(GASPS) (GRUNTS)

BOTH: Ah.

(GRUNTING)

(GRUNTS)

LORD ROGERS: Ha-ha!

(MOTOR WHIRRING)

This guy's, like, from the future.

(MOTOR SCREECHING)

We got a Code Z.

(GASPS) Fellas! They got the Code Z!

(SOFTLY) Distract them.

Um...

(GRUNTING)

(ROARING)

These guys are super-focused.

Phew. (SCREAMING)

(GROANS)

(GASPS)

A princess never laughs too loudly.

Time for your adventure, Alise.

We'll be gone before Uberta even wakes up.

Alise! (ALL GASPING)

Morning yoga.

Time to rise and shine, my sweet little princess.

Everybody down!

(INHALES DEEPLY)

I breathe peace.

Quickly, before she breathes fire!

Let's greet the sunrise, young princess.

(SHRIEKING)

(SCREAMING)

(LAUGHING)

(GRUNTS) Rogers!

LORD ROGERS: Carpe diem!

(CONTINUES LAUGHING)

She's gonna be mad at me forever.

Part of being a modern princess,

is suffering the wrath of old royalty with a smile.

Let's see one now.

Ah, that's my girl.

Oh, I breathe peace all right,

a piece of Rogers's scalp!

Where are all the horses?

STABLE BOY: They're out to pasture, Highness.

(SQUEALS)

We're going sailing?

Oh, I hope Granmum will let me.

Well, she can't stop us now.

Are you sure?

Of course, I... Ah!

(SNORTING)

Rogers! As your queen...

Trade you.

You'll never escape!

It's like she's got rabies!

QUEEN UBERTA: Never underestimate... (SQUEALING)

...the Queen!

(WATER SPLASHING)

(COUGHING)

FISHERMAN: Not to worry, Your Highness.

I've pulled in huge whoppers like you before.

(CRYING)

I've driven Alise away with my stupid Princess Boot Camp!

Ugh.

Now, she'll be lost at sea.

There, there, let's not assume the worst, Queen Uberta.

She'll be picked up by a pirate ship and learn pirate ways!

She'll spend her days plundering and pillaging!

And then she'll come back someday with a peg leg

and a burning torch in her cute little hook-hand!

(CONTINUES CRYING)

And she'll say, "This is what you get, Granny,

"for teaching me to curtsy 24/7!"

(GLUGS)

Who did that?

(SQUAWKS) Oh, thank you, Puffin, for your courage.

Well, it was a tough decision, but I said to myself...

I'm over it.

Now get out of here and find Alise!

Both of you!

(SCULLIONS CLAMORING) (SIGHING)

PUFFIN: No! You have to row together!

Well, as flying squirrels, the time we spend in boats is limited.

On my count then. Ready?

And hep! SCULLIONS: Hep!

And hep! SCULLIONS: Hep!

And hep! SCULLIONS: Hep!

Hold on. Time-out.

(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)

What's "hep"?

SCULLIONS: Yeah!

Well, it's just a sound! You row on "hep"!

Can we choose a different word?

Yeah! How about "Dodgenberry Chuckwit"?

Yeah, I like that.

PUFFIN: "Dodgen..."

No. Look, fellas, the sound isn't important.

What's important is that we all work together

for Alise.

ALL: Yeah!

For!

SCULLIONS: Alise!

For! SCULLIONS: Alise!

For! SCULLIONS: Alise!

For! SCULLIONS: Alise!

For! SCULLIONS: Alise!

(LORD ROGERS LAUGHING)

Yes, this is the life.

The warm sun on your pale skin.

The salty air in your windswept face.

The fruity drinks with the little paper umbrellas.

Fill 'er up, thin one.

That frog is going to be a distraction.

JEAN-BOB: Distraction?

ALISE: I'm ready for training, Lord Rogers.

Then come on up, future sea captain! Ha-ha!

And to think, Uberta thought I would turn you into a... (GASPS)

Pirate!

♪ What do you see when you're looking at me?

♪ 'Cause there's much more than meets the eye

♪ Something inside me longs to be free

♪ And it's something I just can't deny

♪ Oh, I'm not afraid

♪ Oh, to stand up and say

♪ There's more to me than just ribbons and curls

♪ This wild heart is longing to travel the world

♪ So bring on the danger The song of the sea

♪ Adventure is waiting It's calling to me

♪ I know who I am And I'll take my place

♪ I'll be a princess tomorrow But a pirate today

♪ There are those who say that I can't do both

♪ Live life as a princess with a pirate's oath

♪ There's a world to explore and I'll do it my way

♪ Save dreams for tomorrow and live for today ♪

LORD ROGERS: No!

♪ There's more to me than just ribbons and curls

♪ This wild heart is longing to travel the world

♪ So bring on the danger The song of the sea

♪ Adventure is waiting It's calling to me

♪ I know who I am And I'll take my place

♪ I'll be a princess tomorrow Princess tomorrow

♪ I'll take my place

♪ Princess tomorrow Princess tomorrow

♪ I'll be a princess tomorrow

♪ But a pirate today ♪

So, what course are ye chartin'

for the comin' days at sea, Jolly Rogers?

We're sailing back first thing in the morning!

Home already? Blimey, Cap'n!

Uberta was right! I've turned you into a pirate!

She's gonna be mad at me forever.

Aye, but we must learn to suffer the wrath of royalty with a smile.

Don't lose yer jolly, Jolly Rogers!

(CRYING)

By the time we get home, she'll have a case of scurvy!

ALISE: Ahoy! What be that exceeding bright star?

Ha.

That is the North Star.

ALISE: She's bright as a treasure, she is.

For centuries, sailors have kept

their eye on her because she is constant,

never moving, always true.

Much like the love of your dear parents, Alise.

Aye. Then I've got two North Stars at home, don't I?

Indeed. Don't mess it up.

(THUNDER RUMBLING)

(GRUNTS)

Be calm, friends! You're with a man who knows the ropes!

That's an awful lot of rope-y tie-y off-y things.

(GRUNTING)

(GASPS)

Don't fret, lads. Lord Rogers knows what he's doing.

Don't you, Jolly Rogers?

(SCREAMING)

I'm going to take that as a no.

(BREATHING HEAVILY)

Back down below, young princess!

Whoa!

(SHIP CREAKING)

Get ready to pull!

Lord Rogers!

(GROANING)

(GRUNTING)

Oh, no. Ah!

BRODIE: For! SCULLIONS: Alise!

BRODIE: For!

SCULLIONS: Alise!

BRODIE: For! SCULLIONS: Alise!

I sure hope they're not out there.

BRODIE: For! SCULLIONS: Alise!

(ALISE LAUGHING)

I'll give you back your color if you give me back mine.

ALISE: (LAUGHING) What a bunch of landlubbers.

Jolly Rogers! The sun, she rises!

(SIGHS) The worst is over.

(RUMBLING) (JEAN-BOB GROANS)

Except for the part where we sink!

(GRUNTS)

(GASPS)

At least, it can't get any worse.

(GASPS)

Okay, can everyone stop saying how things can't get any worse?

(GASPS)

(STRUGGLING) Alise... Alise! Where is she?

Lord Rogers!

Turtle in trouble.

(GASPS)

Gracias.

Hop on.

Where's Rogers and Jean-Bob?

Alise!

Oh, dear.

(GRUNTING)

Now who is the distraction?

Pull me back!

Admit I'm a prince!

Right, a prince with suction cups! (GASPS)

(BOTH SCREAMING)

Alise! Alise! Where is she?

CHUNK: Whoa. It can't be.

KITTLE: A pink belly!

I get the toes!

Well... I get the fingers!

Hey! Now, come on! I call the neck.

You all get the scraps.

Meat! BOGGS: Meat!

Meat! Ah!

What, Nums?

NUMS: Well, that's the scrawniest pink belly I've ever seen!

"Scrawny"? What I lack in mass, I make up in power.

These are a pair of quality ham hocks, I guarantee you!

Hmm.

I get first dibs. The rest of you can have the scraps.

(GASPS) Perhaps I've oversold my assets.

(CHOKING)

(GASPS)

Now hold on just a minute!

If I'm going to be eaten, I'm going to be eaten with style.

Move!

Let's see, what have we got here?

(CLEARS THROAT) Look at this place! Dill! Rosemary! Tarragon!

You're living in a veritable herb garden!

Why would you gobble me down raw

when you could season and slow-roast me to savory perfection?

Hmm. He makes a good point.

(GROWLS) Okay. Quick, how would you cook you?

"Quick" nothing! You're going to learn to cook with passion

or you'll be kicked out of my kitchen!

Look, Pink Belly...

You will call me "Chef" throughout the competition.

"Competition"?

Precisely! I'm splitting you up into two groups.

Team Starfish!

And Team Coconut!

The team that turns me into the most savory dish...

(GULPS)

Wins.

RUNT: But, Mr. Pink Belly...

I mean Chef. Chef...

Too late! Get out! Out!

(RUNT PANTING)

Anyone else with a question that just can't wait?

ALL: No, Chef!

Then let's get to work.

Herbs, people! Or whatever you are.

Herbs!

You! Me! Kitchen inspection! Now!

(GROWLING)

(GASPS)

(GRUNTS)

(LAUGHING)

(GASPS)

Look.

(CHUCKLING NERVOUSLY) If you thought he was scrawny, I'm even more meatless.

I'm practically a soy product!

It's Green Thing!

(WHIMPERING)

(CHANTING) ♪ Green Thing

♪ Green Thing

♪ Green Thing, Green Thing Green Thing, Green Thing

♪ Green Thing ♪

Finally... My peeps.

(GASPS)

"Just a frog," eh? He says as he waves with his suction cups.

Oh... (MUFFLED YELLING)

You might be Chef, but you're also dinner. (CHUCKLES)

There's another one out there.

Go find this "Alise" he talked about.

No sign of them? ALISE: Uh-uh.

Of course, Jean-Bob will blend in with everything.

Yep. And Rogers could be standing behind a bamboo shoot.

(GRUNTS)

SCULLY: Run. What did you say?

Huh?

SCULLY: Alise, you must run.

Ah!

Scully?

A thousand apologies, Princess.

Didn't mean to scare you, but... Scully!

(GASPS)

I never thought I'd get a chance to see you, to thank you.

You saved my life!

It was nothing.

But you died!

Obviously not! Look, I'd love to chat.

For instance, someday I need a good recipe for a chocolate-chip scone.

But for now, you really must get moving, okay?

Move along now. Go, go.

Run, Speed!

I'm in top gear.

Thank you, Scully! I'll try to find that recipe!

Off you go, Alise!

No...

CHUNK: Move it!

(ALISE SCREAMING) (GROANING)

(GASPS)

Gracias. (BOTH GASPING)

(ANIMAL CACKLING)

RUNT: Good-bye, meat thing.

(COUGHING)

Are you okay?

Yeah.

Wow.

SPEED: Double wow.

This is where you live, um...

Lucas.

I'm Alise.

Princess Alise.

Wait, you're a princess?

But today, I'm a pirate.

(CHUCKLES) Then you'll be good at this. Hold on!

So, what are those things?

Boggs. Very dangerous, and very hungry.

How do you survive?

They don't know I'm here. At least I hope they still don't.

Gracias.

A songbook?

Oh, do you like to sing?

So, you got shipwrecked too, huh?

More like raft-wrecked.

I was trying to sail away, because...

Well, because of my parents.

Your parents?

FATHER: So, we're agreed then?

It is for the best, isn't it?

Yes. Tomorrow, you can take him to the orphanage.

MOTHER: Lucas?

Lucas? Lucas! FATHER: Lucas!

(ECHOING) Lucas!

They didn't want me.

Didn't want you?

How can you be so sure?

They were going to give me away.

But there must have been some reason.

It doesn't matter.

Right now, we've gotta save your friend, the old guy.

ALISE: Lord Rogers?

Did you see a frog, too?

Green. Looks like a frog.

They're both fine, well, for now.

But together, I think you and I and...

Friends call me Speed.

...and your awesome talking turtle, we've got a chance.

WOODCUTTER: No, no, I haven't seen a boy.

You think he might've passed by here?

Well, it's more likely he's hiding in your forest.

All alone in the forest?

He's never really had a home.

He's grown up outdoors.

But he could survive in a forest like yours quite easily.

I see. Well, I'll certainly keep an eye out for, uh...

Lucas. His name is Lucas.

(SIGHS)

Maybe Lucas is better off.

Who wants to be with a father who can't even provide for his own...

Don't say that! We are a family.

And Lucas couldn't ask for a better father.

And you'll be able to work again, I just know it.

BRODIE: For! SCULLIONS: Alise!

BRODIE: For! SCULLIONS: Alise!

For! SCULLIONS: Alise!

BRODIE: For! SCULLIONS: Alise!

Very funny. What?

(GRUNTS) Hey!

(BOTH GRUNTING)

Huh?

(SCULLIONS CLAMORING)

SCULLION 1: Stay away!

(SCULLIONS SCREAMING)

SCULLION 2: Attack!

(SCULLIONS SCREAMING)

(SCULLIONS CLAMORING)

(CHUCKLING) Stop that! What are you doing?

SCULLION 1: He's got Brodie! (GASPS)

(HISSING)

(ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)

(GASPING) There he is!

Got him!

Got him.

What do you know? That daft bird just saved us.

(SIGHS) For now, anyhow.

You're late! Move it!

I've never seen a more pathetic group!

You really think you can turn me into a quality meal?

BOGGS: Yes, Chef!

I'll be the judge of that!

Actually, uh, you won't be around to be the judge of that.

Oh, out of my kitchen!

It was a simple observation!

Now, our first job is to slice, chop, dice, and julienne-cut.

(SIGHS) Make the food smaller.

(BOGGS LAUGHING)

(GROANS)

Ah!

(BOGGS LAUGHING)

You like this presentation?

Yeah.

Take a closer look.

Get out! (GROANS)

Start over!

(POUNDING)

(BREATHING HEAVILY)

Ah, perfect picnic slices.

Team Starfish. Bunch of bootlickers.

I'm thrilled to learn from Chef and to eat him, of course.

Now, we carefully add herbs and spices.

Eh.

Do you even know what you're putting in there?

Yes, Chef, it's rosemommy.

(INHALES DEEPLY)

Oh!

Taste it before you add more!

ALL: Yes, Chef!

Oh, lovely! Why not stick your whole face in the pot!

Yes, Chef!

(SCREAMING)

"It's rosemary. Taste before you add more.

"Don't stick your face in the soup."

I could've told you that last one.

Tell us, oh, Green Thing.

What is the most important thing in life?

(MUMBLING)

Floss daily.

(IMITATES EXPLOSION)

Okay, people, we're zesting, everybody zesting!

You're not zesting.

There's nothing to zest, Chef.

Oh, here you go.

(BOGGS LAUGHING)

Gee, let's trade!

(GRUNTS)

Throwing food is absolutely...

(SCREAMING)

(BOGGS CLAMORING)

Enough! Enough!

All right! Taste test! Right now!

We're picking a winner! Let's go!

(SPITS) Oh.

(SPUTTERS) (GROANING)

(BOGGS LAUGHING)

Both equally wretched! Start over!

Actually, it wasn't that bad.

(GRUNTS)

I'm done with cooking!

(GASPS) Hold on! What's this?

I'm getting the aftertaste of Team Coconut's broth.

Mmm.

Uh, robust! Nutty! Yes!

Team Coconut is the winner!

(TEAM COCONUT CHEERING)

(CHUCKLING) Robust and nutty.

Well, he got the "nutty" part right.

(BOGGS LAUGHING)

ALL: Yeah!

NUMS: Now, throw him in the soup.

Without roasting me first? (GASPS)

More steps?

You won the broth round. Now we move on to the roasting round.

(GRUNTING)

(CHUCKLES) "The roasting round"!

We're gonna blow Chef away!

After we cook him, then Chef will see who's...

Wait.

Oh, now you get it!

We can't just leave Rogers and Jean-Bob like that!

We have time. Your friends are doing a good job stalling,

and we need to take advantage of that.

To do what?

It's no use to set them free if we don't have a way to escape.

You're right.

And listen, the Boggs have super-good hearing, so...

We can be quiet.

Oh, oh, now?

He's going to teach us some hand language.

(MOUTHING)

Um...

"In the case of an emergency,

"exits are located here and here"?

No. I think he said,

"You two go that way, 10 paces, then split up and wait."

You're good.

(COMMUNICATING IN SIGN LANGUAGE)

(BUZZING)

I agree with Speed. I don't believe you.

Even I understood that.

That bright one, it's the North Star.

It never moves.

Sailors keep their eye on it because it's constant.

Like a parent's love.

Who told you that?

Lord Rogers.

(CHUCKLING) You mean the guy that got you shipwrecked.

When we get home, you'll see.

You'll see how good parents can be.

Let's just finish the raft.

(SCULLIONS GROANING)

You think Puffin got, you know...

(IMITATES CHOMPING) (GROANING)

That would be merciful compared to this.

Raise that pokey-uppy thing so I can get a better view.

(SCULLIONS GRUNTING)

The lot of ya, climb up here and spread out.

(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)

SCULLION: Grab my hand.

There we go.

We should have done this before!

For Alise!

SCULLION 1: For! SCULLIONS: Alise!

SCULLION 1: For! SCULLIONS: Alise!

(PEOPLE CHEERING)

Derek! Derek!

DEREK: What is it? It's... It's Alise.

(BOTH GRUNTING)

It's perfect!

Yeah, I think it'll work.

It just needs to be bigger, right?

I mean, we'll need more space for Rogers.

What?

I'm not going.

"Not going"?

Look, I'm glad you have perfect parents and a castle and friends.

But that's not my world.

But the Boggs!

They still don't know I'm here.

When you go, it'll just be like before.

Look, I'll help you and your friends get on your way,

but this is my home.

♪ Didn't they want me?

♪ Didn't they care?

♪ How could they just turn and leave?

♪ Didn't they love me?

♪ Or was it all a dream?

♪ I'm not really sure what I believe

♪ We were a family

♪ I felt so safe

♪ It was the picture-perfect life

♪ I thought I knew them How was I so wrong?

♪ But if they won't have me

♪ Then I'll just move on

♪ I'm strong, I'm tall standing on my own

♪ I won't give in anymore

♪ I'm brave enough standing on my own

♪ And if no one's there to catch me

♪ Then I'll just never fall

♪ And I'll stand alone

♪ On my own ♪

Oh, I wish my parents were here.

They'd know what to tell him, wouldn't they, Speed?

Yup. They're pretty smart.

Perhaps, I can help. Scully!

I'm a poor substitute for the Prince and Princess, to be sure.

I'm so glad you're here.

Yeah, well, I wish I had better news, but, alas, it's not to be so.

What? Why?

Well, it appears your friends are about to become a main course.

(GASPS) Lord Rogers!

Jean-Bob!

We have to do something!

LORD ROGERS: Way too much fire!

You're slow-roasting, not re-enacting the destruction of Pompeii!

I've seen a candle with more heat.

(GROANS)

You know, raw and uncooked, that's sounding pretty good right now.

Uh...

Oh!

You've all failed! Out! Out of my kitchen!

No, Chef.

(GASPS)

♪ We got meat, fleshy treats Gonna get some

♪ Used to starve, now we carve No more ho-hum ♪

Slow-roasted, I said!

Slow...

♪ Feel the heat, gonna eat Sweet and hearty ♪

No!

♪ What a day, no delay It's a party ♪

Listen to me!

You have to cook me over a very, very low heat

for a very, very long time.

Otherwise, I'll be all crispy on the outside and uncooked on the inside.

Now think, do you want a juicy, well-cooked pink belly

or a tough, dried-out, crispy pink belly?

ALL: Crispy pink belly!

(SHUDDERING)

Jean-Bob! Jean-Bob!

Hark! Methinks I hear the lame brain

who said I am just a... Rogers!

Behold! Green Thing forbids the eating of pink bellies!

"Crispy"!

Crispy pink bellies!

(GROANS)

From now on, we no longer worship green things,

we saute them!

(WHIMPERING)

How do I feel about eating my guru?

Um, surprisingly, I'm okay with it.

Twenty degrees north by northeast.

More fire.

(GROANING)

You think you're so all-powerful? Then act like it!

Oh, you want fire? 'Cause I'll show you some fire, baby!

(SPUTTERING)

Oh, now you've done it! How dare you slather sauce on Green Thing?

JEAN-BOB: Yeah! (IN SIGN LANGUAGE)

JEAN-BOB: "Thou shalt not slather!"

That's a super-big rule!

♪ We got meat, fleshy treat Gonna get some

♪ Used to starve, now we carve, no more ho-hum

♪ Feel the heat, gonna eat Sweet and hearty

♪ What a day, won't delay It's a... ♪

(GASPS)

JEAN-BOB: You better run!

No, you better not! Untie us first!

Ooh, you're back.

Okay. Untie us and all is forgiven!

Shh, Jean-Bob, it's me.

Alise! Alise!

♪ We got meat, fleshy treat Gonna get some

♪ Used to starve, now we carve No more ho-hum ♪

Hurry. Me hungry.

♪ Feel the heat, gonna eat Sweet and hearty ♪

That was a little too good.

More fire.

Hurry! Just one more cut. Ah!

Hey, I'm sorry to crush your barbecue!

Oh... Alise!

It's the girly pink belly!

(GRUNTING)

Ooh.

(PANTING)

Who are you? Just stay close and do exactly what I do.

I'll explain later.

Dinner's on the run!

It's here somewhere. Quick, get in!

(GASPS)

(GRUNTING)

(JEAN-BOB BREATHING HEAVILY)

(SNEEZING)

Meat!

(LUCAS BREATHING HEAVILY)

(ALISE GRUNTS)

Down!

(GROWLS)

Help! I broke my leg! (GASPS)

Meat!

(BOGGS LAUGHING)

(ALISE PANTING)

This thicket will give us cover to the shore.

(GRUNTS)

You're home free. The raft is just around the bend.

Try not to wreck this one.

Don't start!

Are you sure you wanna stay here?

It was a pleasure, Princess, to serve you.

Wait, wait! What? Where's he going?

(HORN BLARING)

You better go.

(ALL GASPING)

(BOGGS LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

ALL: Meat!

This is all my fault, young princess.

If it's any consolation, what you did back there at the camp,

your courage, your cleverness,

to me, you are every inch, every molecule,

a very modern princess.

Um, okay, that's all very sweet, but it's a little gloomy.

So now, everyone, a big, hopeful smile and escape plan!

The only thing worse than eating and running

is running before you're eaten!

SCULLY: Stall. Trust me. Trust me!

Huh? Inspiring and spooky at the same time.

It's only Scully. Do what he says.

I was only testing your culinary determination!

And you failed!

You let dinner escape!

You don't deserve a main course like me!

Oh, come on, don't say that!

Yeah, yeah, we'll work harder, promise.

Don't fall for his tricks! He's just stalling, is all!

Isn't he, Nums? (ARROW FLETCHING)

(GROANS) Ouch.

Fire!

SCULLIONS: For Alise!

(ALL YELLING)

Get them!

(YELLING)

Ooh.

(LAUGHS)

SCULLION 1: Get up there!

(BOGGS LAUGHING)

(SCREAMING)

(PANTING)

Ah! (GASPS)

Keep coming, Lord Rogers!

Ah!

The Princess is secure! Everyone, back to the boat!

Let's move. Move, move!

(GROWLING)

(GRUNTS)

Brodie said, "To the boat!" Let's get out of here!

Gotcha! (GASPS)

LORD ROGERS: Alise! Oh, no!

(ALISE STRUGGLING)

(LAUGHS)

Meat.

(GASPS)

Good thing you're a quick learner.

You came back!

Come on!

(NUMS GRUNTING)

(GROANS)

(GASPS)

(GRUNTS)

SCULLIONS: Lucas!

(GROANING)

SCULLIONS: Whoa!

(GRUNTING)

(ALL CHEERING)

On top of that, you are the worst chef-in-training ever!

It's for the best, Lucas. I promise.

I can't stay here now. They've seen me.

(ALISE SIGHS)

(GROANING)

Meat!

(QUEEN UBERTA LAUGHING)

Rogers! Rogers!

You have every right to be angry with me, Uberta.

(CRYING) No! Rogers! No, no, no!

Oh, that's my granmum, Queen Uberta.

She's kind of intense, but awesome at the same time.

But I must say, Alise has changed.

(GASPS) Lucas?

Oh, come to me, darling!

(GASPS) Alise, you'll sweat!

"Changed," indeed!

The only thing missing is a beard and a bottle of rum!

Lucas!

He's gone.

If only we had someone, someone who knows how that boy thinks,

what he might do, how he might hide, etcetera, etcetera.

Ha!

Oh, um...

Just making sure you were, uh, still alive, and you are.

(SIGHS)

(GRUNTS)

(GRUNTING)

You've gotta come down sometime!

Whoa!

Maybe not.

We should see the castle soon.

(SOBBING)

This will all work out. Whoa! He's right about that, Princess.

Scully!

In fact, let me rephrase and say

it has all worked out in a most extraordinary way.

Alise is safe? Absolutely, indeed.

Ah... Thank heavens!

(CHUCKLES) I'm so happy!

However... (GASPS)

No, I don't mean "however,"

rather, in addition... (SIGHS)

Alise desperately needs your help.

"Desperately"? DEREK: "Desperately"?

No, no, no, too strong a word,

much too strong. Phew.

And yet... BOTH: Scully!

I'm sorry. No time to explain.

Just hurry up, take the back road into the kingdom.

But that takes twice as long.

Trust me, take that road!

Must go. Ta for now. Good-bye!

But...

Whoa!

Hmm.

Which way?

Go left. Trust me.

Oh, okay, to the left it is.

(PANTING)

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING) (GASPS)

I got you!

Leave me alone!

Sorry. Have a good day.

ODETTE: Scully? DEREK: Whoa.

Oof.

Oh, man, I'm winded.

I gotta drop some weight, but how can a ghost lose weight?

Yeah, I know. Okay, why the back road, you ask.

Because, somewhere along the way, you'll meet his parents.

Whose parents?

The boy's, Lucas!

Who's Lucas? Long story. Just stop them!

Okay, back in a jiff.

Scully! Very important instructions.

But he's getting away!

I know, but listen to me!

Stop. Pay attention. Are we all ears?

Yes.

Don't chase him that way. Chase him that way.

But what difference does it make?

It'll all be clear in a jiffy!

Just go! He's getting away!

DEREK: Whoa!

Hello.

Your Highness.

That's such a lovely wagon.

By "lovely," she means, well, uh, sturdy.

Oh, oh, that's right.

My family always says "lovely" when they mean "sturdy."

So, where are you headed in your lovely, sturdy wagon?

Why don't you tell us about yourselves?

Oh, yes, please do. We've got time.

Oh, oh.

Well, um...

Perfect. Doing great. Spot on. Keep it up.

(LUCAS GRUNTING)

Now listen! I'm on your side!

Do you think I want you to be sad and alone?

Do you?

If you'd only slow down and listen!

ODETTE: I'm so sorry. (GASPS)

That's my mother.

MOTHER: His name was Lucas.

That's... That's my mom!

He was a fine boy, a good boy.

A hard worker, and never any trouble to us.

And you never knew why he disappeared?

We've always, uh, been very poor.

People are slow to give my husband a chance.

But he can do anything.

So, we thought...

We thought it best that he go to an orphanage.

But to him, he must've thought we didn't love him.

Before we had time to explain...

He was gone.

Mom? Father? (SHUDDERING)

Lucas? Lucas!

MOTHER: Oh...

Mother! (ODETTE SOBBING)

After all this time, how?

We must have had help from angels, dear.

Yes, the help of angels indeed.

♪ Oh, oh, oh

♪ Oh, oh, oh

♪ Oh, oh, oh

♪ Oh, oh, oh

♪ When you're feeling lost and out of place

♪ When it seems like it seems so hard to find your way

♪ Keep your head up, don't give up, look to the sky

♪ And I'll be there always shining by your side

♪ I'll be the one leading you home

♪ I'll be that light alone, yeah

♪ I'll be the light shining on you

♪ I'll be your star

♪ I'll be the one cheering you on

♪ I believe in you with all the love that's in my heart

♪ I'll be your star

♪ Oh, oh, oh

♪ Oh, oh, oh

♪ Oh, oh, oh

♪ Every day's a new adventure to be found

♪ Every dream you have that's calling for you now

♪ We can go out, take a chance now, open your eyes

♪ Because no matter where you are, you're always fine

♪ I'll be the one leading you home

♪ I'll be that your light alone, yeah

♪ I'll be the light shining on you

♪ I'll be your star, oh, oh

♪ I'll be the one cheering you on

♪ I believe in you with all the love that's in my heart

♪ I'll be your star

♪ Oh, oh, oh

♪ Oh, oh, oh

♪ Oh, oh, oh

♪ All you have to do is think of me

♪ I'll be there for you, my love

♪ Always has been

♪ I'll be the one leading you home

♪ I'll be that your light alone, yeah

♪ I'll be the light shining on you

♪ I'll be your star

♪ I'll be the one cheering you on

♪ I believe in you with all the love that's in my heart

♪ I'll be your star

♪ Oh, oh, oh

♪ I'll be your star, baby

♪ I'll be your star

♪ I'll be the one leading you home

♪ I'll be that your light alone, yeah

♪ I'll be the light shining on you

♪ I'll be your star

♪ I'll be the one cheering you on

♪ I believe in you with all the love that's in my heart

♪ I'll be your star ♪