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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:02:13,533 --> 00:02:15,801 In the last years of the Cold War, 2 00:02:15,873 --> 00:02:17,366 the former Soviet Union 3 00:02:17,444 --> 00:02:20,476 developed a new weapon of mass destruction. 4 00:02:20,554 --> 00:02:24,156 Harnessing the awesome power of Earth's own gravity, 5 00:02:24,231 --> 00:02:27,674 these GD-34 GROWLER bombs were smaller 6 00:02:27,742 --> 00:02:29,372 and more destructive 7 00:02:29,447 --> 00:02:35,420 than any battlefield munition previously deployed. 8 00:02:35,499 --> 00:02:37,436 In the late 20th century, 9 00:02:37,505 --> 00:02:39,807 the largest repossession company was GMAC, 10 00:02:39,879 --> 00:02:42,785 General Motors Acceptance Corporation. 11 00:02:42,854 --> 00:02:44,849 With the deregulation of the banks, 12 00:02:44,927 --> 00:02:47,628 GMAC and other less scrupulous companies 13 00:02:47,703 --> 00:02:49,401 were able to sell mortgages 14 00:02:49,475 --> 00:02:51,879 to poor people who couldn't possibly afford them. 15 00:02:51,949 --> 00:02:53,749 As the economy collapsed, 16 00:02:53,821 --> 00:02:56,921 repossession and corrections became the United States' 17 00:02:56,998 --> 00:03:00,441 only non-military growth industries. 18 00:03:00,508 --> 00:03:05,250 Meanwhile, six GROWLERS remained unaccounted for. 19 00:03:51,663 --> 00:03:53,692 Miss Pixxi? 20 00:04:01,526 --> 00:04:03,657 Miss Pixxi! 21 00:04:07,812 --> 00:04:09,145 What's up? 22 00:04:09,217 --> 00:04:12,055 Your forbearers will see you now. 23 00:04:12,125 --> 00:04:13,891 My what? 24 00:04:13,964 --> 00:04:18,706 Your father, your aunt, your grandmother. 25 00:04:18,778 --> 00:04:21,114 You know the drill. 26 00:04:35,229 --> 00:04:37,828 Sit down, Pixxita. 27 00:04:40,110 --> 00:04:43,210 Since our last meeting, Pixxi, 28 00:04:43,286 --> 00:04:47,059 you have been arrested how many times? 29 00:04:47,131 --> 00:04:48,999 Well, it's been 18, hasn't it? 30 00:04:49,071 --> 00:04:51,202 18 times. 31 00:04:51,277 --> 00:04:52,838 Come on, Pops, you know how it is. 32 00:04:52,916 --> 00:04:54,750 It's those fuckin' Beverly Hills cops. 33 00:04:54,822 --> 00:04:56,851 They be lyin' at my probation hearing, 34 00:04:56,928 --> 00:04:58,796 they be lyin' in wait outside our gate. 35 00:04:58,867 --> 00:05:03,244 Your driving license was revoked a year ago. 36 00:05:03,314 --> 00:05:06,346 Why are you still driving, Pixxi? 37 00:05:06,423 --> 00:05:08,189 A girl's gotta eat, right? 38 00:05:08,262 --> 00:05:09,823 I'm entitled to a life. 39 00:05:09,900 --> 00:05:10,994 It's in the Constitution. 40 00:05:11,071 --> 00:05:13,134 Holding up with strangers! 41 00:05:13,210 --> 00:05:14,270 Hookups, Mother. 42 00:05:14,347 --> 00:05:15,942 They call it "hooking up." Hookups. 43 00:05:16,019 --> 00:05:17,113 That's right. 44 00:05:17,189 --> 00:05:20,129 Oh, Grandma, those are lies. 45 00:05:20,198 --> 00:05:22,101 I knew all five of those boys. 46 00:05:22,171 --> 00:05:23,401 Are we done yet? 47 00:05:23,475 --> 00:05:26,918 Pixxi, we De La Chasses 48 00:05:26,985 --> 00:05:31,020 are often accused of being rapacious oligarchs. 49 00:05:31,098 --> 00:05:38,245 Merely on account of our wealth, we are abused and persecuted. 50 00:05:38,320 --> 00:05:45,297 Can you not see how your actions add to our burden of suffering? 51 00:05:45,374 --> 00:05:46,809 No. 52 00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:50,014 Pixxita, at our last Family Council, 53 00:05:50,089 --> 00:05:55,936 you swore to abstain from drinking, driving, clubbing, 54 00:05:56,007 --> 00:05:57,340 eating in restaurants, 55 00:05:57,411 --> 00:06:00,010 lending the De La Chasse family name 56 00:06:00,085 --> 00:06:02,250 to unguents and perfumes, 57 00:06:02,326 --> 00:06:09,246 and having unprotected sex with boy backup dancers. 58 00:06:09,314 --> 00:06:11,445 And yet, Io and behold, 59 00:06:11,521 --> 00:06:14,587 here we are, two short weeks later, 60 00:06:14,864 --> 00:06:16,836 and you've done all of these things, haven't you? 61 00:06:16,904 --> 00:06:18,339 Yeah. 62 00:06:18,408 --> 00:06:20,242 Pops, don't worry. 63 00:06:20,314 --> 00:06:22,616 The cosmetics deal is going to fall through, but wait! 64 00:06:22,889 --> 00:06:24,553 Wait till you see my line of thongs. 65 00:06:24,627 --> 00:06:26,028 It's so beautiful. 66 00:06:26,098 --> 00:06:27,591 They're pink and purple and yellow, 67 00:06:27,669 --> 00:06:29,138 and some of them glow in the dark. 68 00:06:29,208 --> 00:06:30,541 Cease! 69 00:06:30,611 --> 00:06:35,558 You and your snookery, your gadabout snookery. 70 00:06:35,627 --> 00:06:38,328 Tell her to get a job, or she'll be disinherited. 71 00:06:38,402 --> 00:06:40,100 In light of your continued malfeasance, 72 00:06:40,174 --> 00:06:41,473 we have no choice. 73 00:06:41,545 --> 00:06:44,246 Yes, get a job, or you'll be disinherited! 74 00:06:44,320 --> 00:06:45,687 Dis-in-what? 75 00:06:45,959 --> 00:06:47,428 Dis... dis-in... what? 76 00:06:48,333 --> 00:06:50,362 "DISINHERITED!!!" 77 00:07:00,335 --> 00:07:03,070 Disin... hurted? 78 00:07:03,144 --> 00:07:04,705 What's it mean? 79 00:07:04,782 --> 00:07:07,483 It's when they go to your grave and dig you up! 80 00:07:07,557 --> 00:07:10,760 They can't do it to Pixxi because she's not dead yet! 81 00:07:11,035 --> 00:07:13,634 - Right, Pix? - Right. 82 00:07:13,709 --> 00:07:16,274 Coo-ee! 83 00:07:16,351 --> 00:07:18,380 It's me! 84 00:07:18,457 --> 00:07:20,018 Well, then why did you pick up the phone 85 00:07:20,095 --> 00:07:22,090 if it's a wrong number, asshole? 86 00:07:25,478 --> 00:07:26,777 You mean disinterred, Eggi. 87 00:07:26,849 --> 00:07:29,482 Disinherited is different. 88 00:07:29,557 --> 00:07:30,821 But what does it mean, Pix? 89 00:07:31,096 --> 00:07:32,565 Disinherited is, like, 90 00:07:32,633 --> 00:07:34,628 when someone owes you a lot of money, like a fortune, 91 00:07:34,706 --> 00:07:36,837 and they refuse to hand it over. 92 00:07:37,114 --> 00:07:39,211 And what makes it even worse is that it's your own family 93 00:07:39,286 --> 00:07:41,417 that's trying to screw you over. 94 00:07:41,494 --> 00:07:43,466 That's wack! That's, like, criminal, Pix. 95 00:07:43,533 --> 00:07:45,596 I know, and that's why we're going to go 96 00:07:45,672 --> 00:07:48,168 to my office right now and we're going to get 97 00:07:48,247 --> 00:07:49,774 the best legal advice that they can afford. 98 00:07:49,852 --> 00:07:51,789 - Yes! - Mm-hmm. 99 00:07:54,266 --> 00:07:55,667 Coo-eee! 100 00:07:55,737 --> 00:07:58,506 Okay, this is the second time I'm calling you. 101 00:07:58,578 --> 00:07:59,911 Why do you keep picking up the phone 102 00:08:00,184 --> 00:08:01,312 if it's a wrong number? 103 00:08:01,387 --> 00:08:03,382 - Asshole! - Loser! 104 00:08:03,459 --> 00:08:05,225 God! 105 00:08:05,299 --> 00:08:07,294 "RE-ELECT SENATOR FRANK 'FRITZ' FLETCHER" 106 00:08:07,371 --> 00:08:08,601 "THE BIPARTISAN ALTERNATIVE" 107 00:08:08,676 --> 00:08:10,237 The thing is, Pixxi, 108 00:08:10,314 --> 00:08:11,841 your family don't have to give you any money 109 00:08:11,919 --> 00:08:13,719 if they don't want to. 110 00:08:13,791 --> 00:08:15,421 Yes, they do. 111 00:08:15,496 --> 00:08:16,556 No. 112 00:08:16,633 --> 00:08:17,829 No, in fact, the law says... 113 00:08:17,904 --> 00:08:20,240 Who cares about the fucking law? 114 00:08:20,311 --> 00:08:23,548 It's her family. They can't screw her. 115 00:08:23,621 --> 00:08:24,920 But the law says... 116 00:08:24,992 --> 00:08:27,795 The law can go suck my ass. 117 00:08:27,867 --> 00:08:29,336 Right, Pixxi? 118 00:08:29,405 --> 00:08:30,601 All right, 666, take it easy. 119 00:08:30,676 --> 00:08:31,975 Let's hear what the jerk has to say, 120 00:08:32,047 --> 00:08:33,482 and then if we don't like it, 121 00:08:33,551 --> 00:08:36,389 we'll just throw him down the stairs. 122 00:08:36,459 --> 00:08:37,553 Pixxi. 123 00:08:37,630 --> 00:08:38,826 You're an adult. Yes? 124 00:08:38,900 --> 00:08:40,700 Over 18, 21 presumably? 125 00:08:40,773 --> 00:08:42,539 Don't go there. 126 00:08:44,785 --> 00:08:46,483 The fact is, 127 00:08:46,557 --> 00:08:48,289 your family has no legal obligation 128 00:08:48,363 --> 00:08:49,627 to give you any money. 129 00:08:49,700 --> 00:08:51,968 Yes, they do! 130 00:08:52,040 --> 00:08:53,339 Let me ask you a question. 131 00:08:53,411 --> 00:08:55,508 Stop asking her questions, 132 00:08:55,584 --> 00:08:56,712 and start suing them! 133 00:08:56,788 --> 00:08:58,554 - Pixxi... - Yeah! 134 00:08:58,627 --> 00:09:00,724 When your family said that you were disinherited, 135 00:09:00,800 --> 00:09:02,737 did they offer up any sort of deal, 136 00:09:02,806 --> 00:09:06,681 a resolution for you to be un-disinherited? 137 00:09:09,527 --> 00:09:11,499 I'm sorry, I didn't hear you. 138 00:09:11,566 --> 00:09:14,541 They told me to get a job! 139 00:09:14,609 --> 00:09:16,477 You bastard! 140 00:09:16,548 --> 00:09:19,386 They said if you found a job, you'd be back into the family 141 00:09:19,457 --> 00:09:21,018 so as to inherit? 142 00:09:21,095 --> 00:09:24,127 Ah! It's relatively simple. 143 00:09:24,205 --> 00:09:25,504 Get a job. 144 00:09:25,575 --> 00:09:27,010 I have a job! 145 00:09:27,079 --> 00:09:30,852 I am a cosmetics designer and a fashion designer 146 00:09:30,925 --> 00:09:33,865 and a haute couture model, 147 00:09:33,934 --> 00:09:36,966 and I have my own record company, 148 00:09:37,044 --> 00:09:39,984 and I'm a media executive producer! 149 00:09:40,053 --> 00:09:46,163 I have so many jobs that I can't keep count! 150 00:09:46,238 --> 00:09:47,799 Bastard. 151 00:09:50,952 --> 00:09:52,752 You think it's so easy. 152 00:09:52,825 --> 00:09:54,055 But Pixxi is busy. 153 00:09:54,128 --> 00:09:55,860 With her raft of commitments, 154 00:09:55,934 --> 00:09:58,065 ain't no way she'll be able fit a job into her schedule. 155 00:09:58,141 --> 00:09:59,805 What will she do when the money runs out? 156 00:09:59,879 --> 00:10:02,215 Hey, Pixxi, look! 157 00:10:02,287 --> 00:10:05,957 These guys are attaching the front end of your car 158 00:10:06,032 --> 00:10:09,235 to some great big mobile hook thing. 159 00:10:09,308 --> 00:10:11,781 Savage! 160 00:10:11,849 --> 00:10:13,615 Hey! Hey! Hey! Frankenfuck! 161 00:10:13,688 --> 00:10:15,157 What the hell you think you're doing? 162 00:10:22,381 --> 00:10:25,184 Hello. 163 00:10:28,099 --> 00:10:29,592 This here unit, 164 00:10:29,670 --> 00:10:32,645 it's been reassigned to new owners. 165 00:10:32,712 --> 00:10:34,843 - Huh? - Yep! 166 00:10:34,918 --> 00:10:37,391 You see, the previous caretakers of this here lovely unit, 167 00:10:37,661 --> 00:10:40,362 well, they forgot to take good care of it. 168 00:10:40,436 --> 00:10:42,738 Not only did they neglect to change the oil 169 00:10:42,810 --> 00:10:44,941 and take it in for its 50,000-mile service, 170 00:10:45,016 --> 00:10:47,386 worse, they forgot to fulfill the monthly debt 171 00:10:47,457 --> 00:10:52,130 that they had financially incurred. 172 00:10:52,205 --> 00:10:53,869 Is this a kind of a money thing? 173 00:10:53,943 --> 00:10:55,915 In a nutshell. 174 00:10:55,982 --> 00:10:58,455 Well, you stay here. 175 00:10:58,725 --> 00:11:01,061 My boss is upstairs. This is her car. 176 00:11:01,132 --> 00:11:03,035 I'll go get her. She'll explain everything. 177 00:11:03,105 --> 00:11:04,700 - Okay. - Great, okay. 178 00:11:10,326 --> 00:11:13,164 You're still gonna be here, right? 179 00:11:13,235 --> 00:11:18,113 I mean, you're not gonna drive off while I'm inside? 180 00:11:26,943 --> 00:11:28,777 What's it say? 181 00:11:28,849 --> 00:11:32,018 Well, read it for yourself. 182 00:11:33,497 --> 00:11:35,024 I don't really read too good. 183 00:11:35,101 --> 00:11:38,076 So... can you just tell me what it says? 184 00:11:38,144 --> 00:11:40,913 - You bet. - Okay. 185 00:11:40,986 --> 00:11:42,080 Right there, it says, 186 00:11:42,156 --> 00:11:43,523 "General George Armstrong Custer." 187 00:11:43,594 --> 00:11:45,862 And then, underneath it, in smaller letters, 188 00:11:45,934 --> 00:11:47,871 it says, "Velvet Glove Acceptance Corporation." 189 00:11:47,940 --> 00:11:49,935 That's my company. 190 00:11:50,013 --> 00:11:51,380 Well, all right. 191 00:11:51,451 --> 00:11:53,423 That's all right, yeah. 192 00:11:53,490 --> 00:11:55,621 I tell you what... you stay here, General. 193 00:11:55,898 --> 00:11:57,299 Okay, yes, sir. 194 00:11:57,369 --> 00:12:00,971 Pixxi De La Chasse will be right down, all right? 195 00:12:22,378 --> 00:12:29,229 Guys, how did they get the letters to stand up like this? 196 00:12:29,299 --> 00:12:30,734 Huh, Pix? 197 00:12:31,005 --> 00:12:32,703 How did they get the letters to stand up like this? 198 00:12:32,776 --> 00:12:34,371 On our printer, we only get it flat. 199 00:12:34,448 --> 00:12:36,647 That's unfabulous! 200 00:12:36,721 --> 00:12:42,466 Must be one of those chill, new, super 3-D printers, I guess. 201 00:12:42,539 --> 00:12:44,066 Add to shopping cart! 202 00:12:44,144 --> 00:12:46,116 Now that's fabulous! 203 00:12:46,184 --> 00:12:51,599 "RE-ELECT SUPREME COURT JUSTICE 'TWO STRIKES' ESPINOZA" 204 00:12:51,667 --> 00:12:54,642 "Velvet Glove Acceptance Corporation. 205 00:12:54,709 --> 00:12:57,444 "Hours of opening: 8:00-10:00, 3:30-4:00, 206 00:12:57,518 --> 00:12:59,182 "alternate Thursdays. 207 00:12:59,256 --> 00:13:02,128 "No admittance without appointment. 208 00:13:02,199 --> 00:13:04,695 If no answer, check with bartender." 209 00:13:15,138 --> 00:13:18,238 No answer. 210 00:13:18,314 --> 00:13:20,114 What do we do? 211 00:13:20,187 --> 00:13:23,162 "BEER" 212 00:13:43,557 --> 00:13:45,221 Hey, dildo-head. 213 00:13:45,296 --> 00:13:47,792 We come for our car. 214 00:13:55,728 --> 00:13:57,665 "General Custer?" 215 00:13:57,734 --> 00:14:00,367 I didn't even know we had these. 216 00:14:01,445 --> 00:14:03,382 Did you hear what I said? 217 00:14:03,451 --> 00:14:05,981 I said that we come for our car. 218 00:14:06,059 --> 00:14:08,658 Don't have it. 219 00:14:08,733 --> 00:14:10,728 Give it back. 220 00:14:10,807 --> 00:14:14,716 That car belongs to Pixxi De La Chasse, 221 00:14:14,786 --> 00:14:18,422 the rock star and clothing designer. 222 00:14:18,496 --> 00:14:19,590 Still too late. 223 00:14:19,667 --> 00:14:21,297 Thank you. 224 00:14:21,372 --> 00:14:22,568 She's also a record producer 225 00:14:22,643 --> 00:14:25,310 and bigging the media all the time. 226 00:14:25,384 --> 00:14:29,453 So if you old men want to avoid a world of hurt, 227 00:14:29,530 --> 00:14:32,869 surrender the motor. 228 00:14:32,941 --> 00:14:35,038 Bank took it away about an hour ago. 229 00:14:35,114 --> 00:14:37,484 They move fast on specialty units. 230 00:14:37,554 --> 00:14:39,491 Specialty units, ain't that the truth? 231 00:14:39,560 --> 00:14:41,497 - They took it away fast. - Yep. 232 00:14:41,566 --> 00:14:44,369 For the last time. 233 00:14:46,749 --> 00:14:49,621 Beat the bejesus out of 'em, Eggi! 234 00:14:49,691 --> 00:14:52,027 What? Me? 235 00:14:52,099 --> 00:14:54,128 If you can't do it, have one of the boys do it. 236 00:14:54,205 --> 00:14:55,606 Now! 237 00:14:57,682 --> 00:14:58,844 Oh, yeah! 238 00:14:58,920 --> 00:15:00,550 Get up, you deadbeat scum, 239 00:15:00,624 --> 00:15:03,530 and take what's comin' to ya! 240 00:15:03,600 --> 00:15:07,738 Okay. 241 00:15:07,813 --> 00:15:09,876 My little pumpkin! 242 00:15:09,953 --> 00:15:12,221 Uncle Aguas! 243 00:15:12,494 --> 00:15:14,192 It's my uncle, guys! 244 00:15:24,797 --> 00:15:27,498 Interested? 245 00:15:27,573 --> 00:15:29,545 Partially. 246 00:15:31,585 --> 00:15:34,023 Purchasers of locomotive parts 247 00:15:34,092 --> 00:15:38,765 are subject to an extensive background check. 248 00:15:38,840 --> 00:15:41,278 Patriot Act, et cetera. 249 00:15:45,092 --> 00:15:48,899 But you look okay. 250 00:15:48,971 --> 00:15:50,703 Why, thank you. 251 00:15:50,776 --> 00:15:52,644 I am. 252 00:15:55,658 --> 00:16:03,672 So, Aguas, how long have you been Savage's uncle? 253 00:16:03,749 --> 00:16:06,348 All his life. 254 00:16:06,424 --> 00:16:08,327 So long! 255 00:16:08,397 --> 00:16:09,696 Wow! 256 00:16:09,768 --> 00:16:11,203 That's sick! 257 00:16:11,272 --> 00:16:13,140 Chill! 258 00:16:13,211 --> 00:16:17,748 I still don't see how you could just steal someone's car... 259 00:16:17,825 --> 00:16:20,663 I mean, unit, Mister... 260 00:16:20,734 --> 00:16:22,261 Gray, Ms. Pixxi. 261 00:16:22,338 --> 00:16:23,933 Arizona Gray III can steal 262 00:16:24,011 --> 00:16:26,347 just about any unit you can conceive of, 263 00:16:26,418 --> 00:16:29,324 so long as the bank desires it. 264 00:16:29,394 --> 00:16:32,129 And not just vehicular units. 265 00:16:32,202 --> 00:16:34,299 The bank owns everything. 266 00:16:34,375 --> 00:16:38,912 So Gray goes after boat units, airplane units, railroad units. 267 00:16:38,989 --> 00:16:41,895 Residential units, office building units, 268 00:16:41,965 --> 00:16:44,335 medical-dental units, casino units. 269 00:16:44,405 --> 00:16:47,345 One time, he ripped an entire factory unit! 270 00:16:47,414 --> 00:16:49,477 Yep, should have seen the look on those workers' faces 271 00:16:49,555 --> 00:16:50,956 when they showed up to their jobs 272 00:16:51,026 --> 00:16:53,157 and their plant was gone. 273 00:16:56,041 --> 00:16:58,138 You guys are repo men. 274 00:16:58,214 --> 00:17:00,448 Man, I saw a movie about you. 275 00:17:00,521 --> 00:17:02,516 Shut up, 6. 276 00:17:02,594 --> 00:17:04,121 No, no, look, there was this dude, 277 00:17:04,199 --> 00:17:06,535 and he was being chased by repo men, 278 00:17:06,606 --> 00:17:09,239 and then he drove his car onto the driveway 279 00:17:09,315 --> 00:17:11,081 of this mansion 280 00:17:11,154 --> 00:17:13,057 that belonged to this old Hollywood movie star, 281 00:17:13,126 --> 00:17:14,858 and then he ended up drowned in the pool. 282 00:17:14,931 --> 00:17:16,025 Or was that the beginning? 283 00:17:16,102 --> 00:17:19,008 Hey, Uncle Aguas? 284 00:17:19,078 --> 00:17:22,885 That poster says that you're looking for a few good men. 285 00:17:22,956 --> 00:17:24,951 Yes, always. 286 00:17:25,029 --> 00:17:27,058 A good man is hard to find. 287 00:17:27,135 --> 00:17:29,505 And vice versa, sweetie. 288 00:17:29,576 --> 00:17:31,045 Reason I ask... 289 00:17:38,202 --> 00:17:41,439 That locomotive in the yard. 290 00:17:41,512 --> 00:17:45,958 Locomotive unit, yes, mm-hmm, in our yard? 291 00:17:46,025 --> 00:17:49,330 I would like to buy some parts. 292 00:17:49,402 --> 00:17:51,339 Locomotive unit parts? 293 00:17:51,408 --> 00:17:53,437 That's it. 294 00:17:53,515 --> 00:17:57,322 Did Lola run your security checks? 295 00:17:57,394 --> 00:17:59,559 Mm-hmm. 296 00:17:59,633 --> 00:18:01,297 Assist the gentleman. 297 00:18:01,373 --> 00:18:03,071 Yes, sir. 298 00:18:03,144 --> 00:18:06,119 As I was saying, Uncle Aguas, 299 00:18:06,186 --> 00:18:09,286 my employer, Pixxi De La Chasse, 300 00:18:09,363 --> 00:18:11,665 is always seeking chill, real-life, 301 00:18:11,737 --> 00:18:14,073 real-time experiences. 302 00:18:14,145 --> 00:18:17,211 She's not afraid to roll up her sleeves and get her hands dirty. 303 00:18:17,287 --> 00:18:18,551 She ain't got no sleeves. 304 00:18:18,625 --> 00:18:20,094 You see? 305 00:18:20,163 --> 00:18:23,297 Maybe Pixxi, because she is so fabulous 306 00:18:23,372 --> 00:18:25,275 and down with the common people, Uncle Aguas, 307 00:18:25,344 --> 00:18:26,779 might just consent to... 308 00:18:26,850 --> 00:18:29,049 Pixxi could be a repo man! 309 00:18:29,123 --> 00:18:30,217 Yeah! 310 00:18:30,294 --> 00:18:32,425 - An army of one! - Yes! 311 00:18:32,500 --> 00:18:34,368 - Ripping units! - Yeah! 312 00:18:34,439 --> 00:18:36,103 Sending deadbeats to the bank! 313 00:18:36,177 --> 00:18:40,554 - Yes! - Yes! 314 00:18:40,625 --> 00:18:42,597 This would be the Pixxi De La Chasse 315 00:18:42,664 --> 00:18:44,430 who has nine court appearances coming up 316 00:18:44,503 --> 00:18:47,238 and is looking at jail time if she doesn't get a job 317 00:18:47,311 --> 00:18:49,841 in addition to being disinherited by her family? 318 00:18:49,919 --> 00:18:51,617 That Pixxi? 319 00:18:51,691 --> 00:18:54,129 No comment. 320 00:18:54,199 --> 00:18:56,501 Fuckin' A, that's her. 321 00:18:56,573 --> 00:18:58,441 Get off! 322 00:18:58,512 --> 00:19:00,814 How much you gonna pay me to hire her? 323 00:19:08,609 --> 00:19:11,948 So how much are they paying you? 324 00:19:12,221 --> 00:19:13,622 Don't really know. 325 00:19:13,692 --> 00:19:16,530 Money goes directly to the company. 326 00:19:16,601 --> 00:19:20,739 I just do what Aguas says, and Aguas says, 327 00:19:20,813 --> 00:19:23,753 drive her around, show her the ropes. 328 00:19:23,822 --> 00:19:25,588 Sounds interesting. 329 00:19:25,661 --> 00:19:27,495 So where are they? 330 00:19:27,567 --> 00:19:28,763 Where are what? 331 00:19:28,838 --> 00:19:30,468 The ropes. 332 00:19:30,542 --> 00:19:32,445 In the trunk, along with the spare tire 333 00:19:32,515 --> 00:19:36,789 and some confiscated personal items and checklists. 334 00:19:36,862 --> 00:19:39,996 Are your friends gonna do this all day? 335 00:19:40,071 --> 00:19:41,837 Yeah, actually they're making 336 00:19:41,910 --> 00:19:44,816 a documentary reality show about me. 337 00:19:44,886 --> 00:19:46,413 No kidding! 338 00:19:46,491 --> 00:19:47,721 When's it going to be on the TV? 339 00:19:47,795 --> 00:19:49,698 Not any TV you have. 340 00:19:49,767 --> 00:19:52,332 It's going to be on a very exclusive, in-house, 341 00:19:52,409 --> 00:19:54,677 hotel intranet in Dubai. 342 00:19:54,749 --> 00:19:56,948 That's better than any TV show. 343 00:19:57,023 --> 00:20:00,727 Sorry! 344 00:20:00,801 --> 00:20:01,861 All right. 345 00:20:01,938 --> 00:20:03,670 There's your first assignment. 346 00:20:03,744 --> 00:20:06,080 You see that big old trailer at the end of the street? 347 00:20:06,151 --> 00:20:09,354 We need to liberate that from some Freddie Mac offenders. 348 00:20:09,427 --> 00:20:12,367 These are some mainline mortgage-abusers. 349 00:20:12,436 --> 00:20:13,530 All right. 350 00:20:13,607 --> 00:20:15,909 Let me at 'em. 351 00:20:38,916 --> 00:20:42,050 You have 30 seconds to vacate this property. 352 00:20:42,126 --> 00:20:46,070 After that, I will begin shooting! 353 00:20:46,138 --> 00:20:47,836 Twenty-five. 354 00:20:47,910 --> 00:20:52,549 Excuse me. I mean 10, 9... 355 00:21:48,695 --> 00:21:50,222 Testing, 1, 2, 3. 356 00:21:50,299 --> 00:21:52,430 Pixxi De La Chasse interview. 357 00:21:52,707 --> 00:21:56,012 Take one. 358 00:21:56,084 --> 00:21:58,021 What's up, Pix? 359 00:21:58,090 --> 00:22:01,156 So what was it like, your first day on the job? 360 00:22:01,233 --> 00:22:02,828 That's a very good question. 361 00:22:02,904 --> 00:22:04,134 Wait, wait. 362 00:22:04,209 --> 00:22:05,405 Sorry. 363 00:22:05,479 --> 00:22:07,074 Action! 364 00:22:07,151 --> 00:22:10,719 Take two! 365 00:22:10,795 --> 00:22:15,366 So what was it like, your first day on the job? 366 00:22:17,816 --> 00:22:23,059 Well, you know, at first, I kind of felt bad, you know? 367 00:22:23,132 --> 00:22:27,201 Having to get up real early and dress way down 368 00:22:27,279 --> 00:22:28,373 just to... to fit in. 369 00:22:28,448 --> 00:22:31,354 But once I started doing the work, 370 00:22:31,424 --> 00:22:34,364 I realized that I, too, could make a difference. 371 00:22:34,433 --> 00:22:36,998 It's like my friend the Dalai Lama said, 372 00:22:37,075 --> 00:22:38,978 "When he returned to his own city, 373 00:22:39,048 --> 00:22:42,387 he saw no throne." 374 00:22:42,458 --> 00:22:43,925 Wow. 375 00:22:43,993 --> 00:22:48,090 Pixxi, you know everything. 376 00:22:48,166 --> 00:22:50,031 Wow, yeah. 377 00:22:50,101 --> 00:22:53,868 Pretty much everything worth knowing. 378 00:22:53,940 --> 00:22:59,277 Oh, Aguas, Aguas, you should have seen her, man. 379 00:22:59,348 --> 00:23:01,009 This girl's a natural. 380 00:23:01,083 --> 00:23:04,542 It was one of the finest opera primi I have ever seen. 381 00:23:04,622 --> 00:23:06,089 She shoot the dogs? 382 00:23:06,156 --> 00:23:08,556 No, but she sure scared 'em! 383 00:23:08,627 --> 00:23:11,289 And when she did that countdown... 384 00:23:11,364 --> 00:23:20,241 10, 9, 8, 3, 2, 6, 4... it was a classic. 385 00:23:20,309 --> 00:23:21,435 And the unit? 386 00:23:21,511 --> 00:23:22,603 Already subdivided. 387 00:23:22,679 --> 00:23:24,510 Three new families moved in. 388 00:23:24,582 --> 00:23:26,106 Nice people. 389 00:23:26,184 --> 00:23:28,880 Spoke to 'em a while in their own lingo. 390 00:23:28,955 --> 00:23:30,081 You want to take her out again? 391 00:23:30,156 --> 00:23:32,249 Sure. 392 00:23:32,326 --> 00:23:36,058 Let's see... sailboat. 393 00:23:36,131 --> 00:23:38,224 Sailboat. 394 00:23:38,301 --> 00:23:42,671 Last seen Marina del Rey. 395 00:23:42,941 --> 00:23:45,535 Three corporate jets, Ontario. 396 00:23:45,611 --> 00:23:48,307 Back to Detroit, deadbeats! 397 00:23:48,381 --> 00:23:51,374 And take the bus. 398 00:23:51,452 --> 00:23:53,511 Impressive. 399 00:23:53,588 --> 00:23:55,283 The problem... 400 00:23:55,357 --> 00:23:56,449 Problem? 401 00:23:56,526 --> 00:23:58,255 She's too good. 402 00:23:58,329 --> 00:23:59,421 - Hmm? - Yep. 403 00:23:59,496 --> 00:24:01,157 Look at her stats. 404 00:24:01,232 --> 00:24:03,393 Since yesterday, she has ripped five cars... 405 00:24:03,468 --> 00:24:04,628 - Fantastic! - Four homes... 406 00:24:04,704 --> 00:24:06,331 - Terrific! - Three planes... 407 00:24:06,406 --> 00:24:09,068 six shopping malls, 408 00:24:09,143 --> 00:24:10,701 and two places of worship. 409 00:24:10,979 --> 00:24:14,177 You're saying that if she continues thus, 410 00:24:14,249 --> 00:24:17,481 her work will be the standard by which ours is judged. 411 00:24:17,555 --> 00:24:19,489 Exactly. 412 00:24:19,557 --> 00:24:22,527 We got us a live one, Aguas, filled with boundless energy, 413 00:24:22,594 --> 00:24:24,528 ambitious, sadistic, 414 00:24:24,597 --> 00:24:28,193 fast. 415 00:24:28,269 --> 00:24:32,206 Better add sand to that gas tank. 416 00:24:32,274 --> 00:24:33,673 Check. 417 00:24:33,744 --> 00:24:35,609 666, I'd like these rushes fine-cut by tonight. 418 00:24:35,679 --> 00:24:37,112 Eggi, I'd like you to get my lawyer 419 00:24:37,181 --> 00:24:38,739 on the phone yesterday. 420 00:24:39,018 --> 00:24:41,418 I'd also like a print-out of how my thongs are doing marketwise. 421 00:24:41,487 --> 00:24:45,481 And, Savage, shiatsu now! 422 00:24:51,701 --> 00:24:54,432 What it do? 423 00:24:57,242 --> 00:24:58,607 He got beat up, Pix. 424 00:24:58,677 --> 00:25:00,372 My bodyguard? 425 00:25:00,446 --> 00:25:02,175 There were eight of 'em, Pixxi. 426 00:25:02,249 --> 00:25:05,413 Why'd they beat him up? 427 00:25:05,486 --> 00:25:06,612 Drug dealers. 428 00:25:06,688 --> 00:25:09,316 Drug dealers! 429 00:25:09,392 --> 00:25:13,295 666 owes a lot of money to drug dealers, Pixxi. 430 00:25:13,364 --> 00:25:15,298 - A lot of money. - Drug dealers, huh? 431 00:25:15,367 --> 00:25:16,732 Have they got any good Quaaludes, 432 00:25:16,803 --> 00:25:19,328 any Roar 714, knock you on the floor? 433 00:25:19,405 --> 00:25:23,137 No, just the real thing. 434 00:25:23,211 --> 00:25:27,239 Coke, crank, The Way. 435 00:25:27,316 --> 00:25:29,284 So how much are they charging for a gram of coke? 436 00:25:29,352 --> 00:25:30,410 Less than forty? 437 00:25:30,488 --> 00:25:33,116 No, Pixxi, seventy-five. 438 00:25:33,192 --> 00:25:34,454 What? 439 00:25:34,526 --> 00:25:37,120 No one's that stupid. 440 00:25:37,197 --> 00:25:40,429 Are you guys lying to me? 441 00:25:40,501 --> 00:25:42,298 No, Pixxi! 442 00:25:42,370 --> 00:25:44,429 They beat him brutally. 443 00:25:44,507 --> 00:25:46,634 They said they'd kill me. 444 00:25:46,710 --> 00:25:48,769 Unless he pays them what he owes. 445 00:25:48,846 --> 00:25:51,314 And how much does he owe? 446 00:25:51,382 --> 00:25:54,147 A million dollars. 447 00:25:54,220 --> 00:25:56,085 Are you kidding me? 448 00:25:56,156 --> 00:25:57,589 You're trying to tell me 449 00:25:57,658 --> 00:26:00,183 that you consumed $1 million worth of drugs? 450 00:26:00,262 --> 00:26:02,355 $500 worth of drugs would have killed you. 451 00:26:02,431 --> 00:26:04,194 Why are you still alive, you idiot? 452 00:26:04,267 --> 00:26:08,329 Are you guys trying to lie to me and steal all my money? 453 00:26:08,406 --> 00:26:10,397 No, Pixxi. 454 00:26:10,475 --> 00:26:13,103 Pixxi, new assignment. 455 00:26:13,179 --> 00:26:16,115 Check! 456 00:26:16,183 --> 00:26:18,310 Yard 2 is where all the Secondary Units 457 00:26:18,386 --> 00:26:20,286 are tracked and stored. 458 00:26:20,356 --> 00:26:22,256 Secondary Units? 459 00:26:22,325 --> 00:26:24,759 Up till now, you've just been handling the Primary Units: 460 00:26:24,829 --> 00:26:26,854 Cars and homes and such. 461 00:26:26,931 --> 00:26:30,800 Secondary Units is where all the big, important stuff is. 462 00:26:30,870 --> 00:26:32,565 Consider this your promotion. 463 00:26:37,579 --> 00:26:40,275 Hello, Lola. 464 00:26:40,349 --> 00:26:41,441 New recruit. 465 00:26:41,518 --> 00:26:45,216 Pixxi, meet Lola. 466 00:26:55,871 --> 00:27:00,366 Won't last. 467 00:27:00,444 --> 00:27:02,878 We'll see about that. 468 00:27:02,948 --> 00:27:05,782 So how much are they paying you? 469 00:27:05,851 --> 00:27:10,619 To entertain you, Pinkie? 470 00:27:10,692 --> 00:27:12,717 Not enough. 471 00:27:12,794 --> 00:27:16,891 Go fetch me some dregs from that slop bin over there. 472 00:27:16,967 --> 00:27:20,301 Lola, not that I'm not having a fabulous time with you, 473 00:27:20,371 --> 00:27:21,599 but I'm just wondering, you know, 474 00:27:21,673 --> 00:27:26,270 when the actual fun is going to begin. 475 00:27:26,346 --> 00:27:29,510 This is the fun. 476 00:27:29,584 --> 00:27:30,949 No, no, no, it's not. 477 00:27:31,019 --> 00:27:32,714 The fun is when we were ripping units, 478 00:27:32,788 --> 00:27:35,222 and I was going into people's homes, and I... 479 00:27:35,292 --> 00:27:36,520 That's Primary Units. 480 00:27:36,593 --> 00:27:38,288 Secondary Units are way too heavy, 481 00:27:38,363 --> 00:27:41,993 and by the time they get to us, they're already wrecked. 482 00:27:44,904 --> 00:27:47,635 How about that? 483 00:27:49,911 --> 00:27:51,970 Forget it, Pinkie. 484 00:27:52,048 --> 00:27:53,379 Doesn't exist. 485 00:27:53,449 --> 00:27:55,849 Says here it do, shorty. 486 00:27:55,919 --> 00:27:57,716 Three antique railroad cars. 487 00:27:57,789 --> 00:28:06,257 Dining, Caboose, Observation... $1 Million Reward. 488 00:28:06,334 --> 00:28:09,634 1-900-LOST-TRAIN. 489 00:28:09,705 --> 00:28:12,333 Can I have your phone? 490 00:28:12,409 --> 00:28:19,510 That antique railroad car is an urban myth. 491 00:28:19,585 --> 00:28:22,783 You know, like the poodle in the microwave 492 00:28:22,856 --> 00:28:26,054 or the hippies spitting on the Vietnam vets. 493 00:28:26,329 --> 00:28:28,763 Why did they put a poodle in a microwave? 494 00:28:28,831 --> 00:28:30,765 Was it wet? 495 00:28:30,834 --> 00:28:32,529 They never did. 496 00:28:32,603 --> 00:28:38,544 It's a myth, like these antique railroad cars, 497 00:28:38,611 --> 00:28:40,044 or the big lottery win. 498 00:28:40,114 --> 00:28:42,879 Existing solely to encourage 499 00:28:42,951 --> 00:28:45,682 typical, no-hoper jerk-offs like you. 500 00:28:45,755 --> 00:28:47,347 That's where you're wrong, 501 00:28:47,423 --> 00:28:49,084 'cause I am no typical, no-hoper jerk-off. 502 00:28:49,360 --> 00:28:50,657 I happen to come from one of 503 00:28:50,729 --> 00:28:52,594 L.A.'s nine most influential families, 504 00:28:52,664 --> 00:28:54,564 and if it weren't for some bullshit scandal, 505 00:28:54,633 --> 00:28:57,467 then my father would be mayor. 506 00:28:57,537 --> 00:29:01,804 Take these dregs back to the slop bin. 507 00:29:03,645 --> 00:29:04,942 Check! 508 00:29:18,867 --> 00:29:20,459 Father. 509 00:29:20,536 --> 00:29:24,132 It is I, Pixxita. 510 00:29:24,408 --> 00:29:28,539 Pixxi, is it you? 511 00:29:28,614 --> 00:29:30,104 Last time you were here, 512 00:29:30,182 --> 00:29:34,813 you consigned me, your aunt, and grandmother 513 00:29:34,889 --> 00:29:37,723 to the torments of hell. 514 00:29:37,793 --> 00:29:40,695 You vowed never to return. 515 00:29:40,763 --> 00:29:44,860 Yes, I know, but I think that we can put that in the past now. 516 00:29:44,936 --> 00:29:48,737 Can't we all just get along? 517 00:29:48,808 --> 00:29:54,510 Pixxi, the De La Chasse family escutcheon hangs in the balance. 518 00:29:54,582 --> 00:29:56,573 Have you found gainful employ yet? 519 00:29:56,652 --> 00:29:58,552 Yes, I have found it! 520 00:29:58,621 --> 00:30:01,089 I am a repossession woman. 521 00:30:01,158 --> 00:30:03,490 You and the Beverly Hills court system were right 522 00:30:03,561 --> 00:30:04,892 to force me to get a job. 523 00:30:04,963 --> 00:30:08,058 I've learned so much from my experiences, 524 00:30:08,134 --> 00:30:12,162 especially here, in this beautiful family chapel. 525 00:30:12,240 --> 00:30:16,109 Yes, lovely, isn't it? 526 00:30:16,178 --> 00:30:18,009 So having earned my lesson, 527 00:30:18,081 --> 00:30:20,606 I'd like to take an advance on my inheritance 528 00:30:20,685 --> 00:30:22,744 as to promote a few business ventures 529 00:30:22,821 --> 00:30:25,916 as well as pay off a few fines. 530 00:30:25,992 --> 00:30:30,987 Ten million would be best, but five is acceptable. 531 00:30:31,066 --> 00:30:34,764 Cet argent n'existe plus. 532 00:30:34,837 --> 00:30:40,003 It was so thoughtful and kind of you and grandma and my aunts 533 00:30:40,078 --> 00:30:43,014 to cut me off temporarily. 534 00:30:43,082 --> 00:30:44,606 I... 535 00:30:44,684 --> 00:30:46,515 I really think it just turned me right around, 536 00:30:46,586 --> 00:30:51,183 like as if I took a cold shower in the bright of day. 537 00:30:51,260 --> 00:30:54,253 What did you say before? 538 00:30:54,531 --> 00:31:00,529 I said, Pixxi, that money is no more. 539 00:31:00,606 --> 00:31:02,233 Your entire inheritance, 540 00:31:02,308 --> 00:31:06,006 all $77 million of it, give or take, 541 00:31:06,080 --> 00:31:09,539 has been given to Mother Teresa's Daughters, 542 00:31:09,618 --> 00:31:10,983 which is a marvelous little charity 543 00:31:11,053 --> 00:31:12,680 that provides women of poverty 544 00:31:12,756 --> 00:31:16,056 access to false information regarding pregnancy 545 00:31:16,127 --> 00:31:22,625 and denies access to birth control. 546 00:31:22,703 --> 00:31:27,300 Wow. That's quite something. 547 00:31:27,576 --> 00:31:29,237 Your grandmother thought it would piss you off. 548 00:31:29,312 --> 00:31:31,678 Oh, how it did. 549 00:31:31,748 --> 00:31:34,239 And I'm just going to have to get you back. 550 00:31:34,319 --> 00:31:39,019 You just try, my darling. You just try. 551 00:31:39,092 --> 00:31:45,693 We De La Chasses are white, rich, relatively vice-free. 552 00:31:45,767 --> 00:31:48,703 We have no debts, huge holdings. 553 00:31:48,771 --> 00:31:53,835 And so, my little chickadee, you can't touch us. 554 00:31:57,283 --> 00:32:00,685 You just wait, homes. 555 00:32:03,659 --> 00:32:05,092 So, Lola. 556 00:32:05,160 --> 00:32:06,855 Yes, Pinkie? 557 00:32:06,930 --> 00:32:10,059 Is it true with just a few strokes of the keyboard, 558 00:32:10,134 --> 00:32:13,332 someone could ruin someone's credit score, get them evicted, 559 00:32:13,405 --> 00:32:15,168 kicking and screaming, from their own home, 560 00:32:15,241 --> 00:32:16,833 even if they own it, 561 00:32:16,910 --> 00:32:20,039 or is that just another one of your urban myths? 562 00:32:20,115 --> 00:32:24,985 No, Pinkie. That is no myth. 563 00:32:25,055 --> 00:32:26,886 And there are those of us in our business 564 00:32:26,957 --> 00:32:31,657 who have done that very thing, so as to revenge ourselves. 565 00:32:34,267 --> 00:32:38,671 These are such lovely flowers that you have here. 566 00:32:38,740 --> 00:32:41,038 Really beautiful. 567 00:32:41,110 --> 00:32:43,203 They're Gray's. 568 00:32:43,279 --> 00:32:45,338 Lola, could you show me what keystrokes and mouse clicks 569 00:32:45,416 --> 00:32:47,350 are required to do such a thing? 570 00:32:47,419 --> 00:32:49,182 To do what, Pinkie? 571 00:32:49,255 --> 00:32:51,780 Oh, I don't know, ruin someone's credit, 572 00:32:51,858 --> 00:32:52,984 destroy them completely? 573 00:32:53,060 --> 00:32:57,293 As a joke, obviously. 574 00:32:57,366 --> 00:33:00,666 Sure, Pinkie, I'd be happy to. 575 00:33:00,737 --> 00:33:02,432 Give me a name at random. 576 00:33:02,707 --> 00:33:05,802 Aldrich De La Chasse! 577 00:33:05,877 --> 00:33:06,969 Spell it. 578 00:33:07,045 --> 00:33:13,316 A-L-D-R-I-C-H. 579 00:33:13,388 --> 00:33:17,018 "DE LA CHASSE FAMILY RUINED; ALLEGED FORTUNE DOES NOT EXIST." 580 00:33:36,786 --> 00:33:38,378 It's impossible. 581 00:33:38,455 --> 00:33:40,047 Can't be done. 582 00:33:40,124 --> 00:33:41,216 Doesn't exist. 583 00:33:41,292 --> 00:33:42,884 But I saw it. 584 00:33:42,961 --> 00:33:46,363 I saw the entire train, three cars and a locomotive. 585 00:33:46,433 --> 00:33:49,369 Do you know how many repo men and women 586 00:33:49,437 --> 00:33:51,462 have wasted good man- and women-hours 587 00:33:51,540 --> 00:33:53,804 in the fruitless search for that imaginary unit? 588 00:33:53,877 --> 00:33:55,367 Couple of them never came back, 589 00:33:55,445 --> 00:33:57,743 and the ones that did, well, they were never the same. 590 00:33:57,815 --> 00:33:59,146 That's because they were searching 591 00:33:59,216 --> 00:34:00,478 for something that doesn't exist. 592 00:34:00,552 --> 00:34:01,883 A ghost train. 593 00:34:01,954 --> 00:34:03,444 This is not a ghost train. 594 00:34:03,523 --> 00:34:05,889 It is made of real flesh and blood, like me... 595 00:34:05,959 --> 00:34:08,861 and it's worth a million dollars! 596 00:34:08,930 --> 00:34:10,295 Have you called that 900 number? 597 00:34:10,366 --> 00:34:12,163 The one that's offering the million dollars? 598 00:34:12,234 --> 00:34:13,496 I don't have the train yet. 599 00:34:13,570 --> 00:34:15,538 Well, why don't you call them now 600 00:34:15,807 --> 00:34:18,241 and see if the offer still exists? 601 00:34:18,310 --> 00:34:21,838 I'll call them, after I rip that train, Lola. 602 00:34:29,225 --> 00:34:30,817 Hey. 603 00:34:33,864 --> 00:34:35,923 Make a charitable contribution? 604 00:34:36,000 --> 00:34:37,524 What's the charity? 605 00:34:37,603 --> 00:34:39,935 Against golf. 606 00:34:40,006 --> 00:34:41,200 I don't play golf. 607 00:34:41,274 --> 00:34:42,502 Nor do I. 608 00:34:42,577 --> 00:34:45,273 We're gonna get it made illegal. 609 00:34:45,347 --> 00:34:47,872 Do you know how many lives are ruined by golf courses? 610 00:34:47,950 --> 00:34:50,578 Nope, but I can imagine. 611 00:34:53,558 --> 00:34:55,025 Only got a buck on me. 612 00:34:55,093 --> 00:34:58,552 That's fine. 613 00:34:58,631 --> 00:35:01,465 Thank you. 614 00:35:01,536 --> 00:35:04,027 Who was that, Gray? 615 00:35:04,105 --> 00:35:06,939 Man taking up a collection to ban golf. 616 00:35:07,010 --> 00:35:08,409 - No kidding! - Yep. 617 00:35:08,478 --> 00:35:10,469 I've never been golfing. 618 00:35:10,548 --> 00:35:12,846 Me neither. 619 00:35:12,918 --> 00:35:14,886 You want to give it a whirl? 620 00:35:14,953 --> 00:35:16,352 Sure, boss, on my next day off... 621 00:35:16,422 --> 00:35:18,322 Okay, stop changing the subject! 622 00:35:18,392 --> 00:35:23,023 Aguas, assign me that train. 623 00:35:23,098 --> 00:35:24,565 All right. 624 00:35:24,634 --> 00:35:28,901 That unit that doesn't exist, the ghost train, 625 00:35:28,973 --> 00:35:33,172 you're assigned to find it. 626 00:35:33,245 --> 00:35:35,577 Thanks! 627 00:35:35,649 --> 00:35:38,140 This is after you do your real work, kiddo. 628 00:35:38,219 --> 00:35:40,153 We have a date tomorrow to smash up 629 00:35:40,222 --> 00:35:43,249 a pallet-Ioad of mercury vapor lamps. 630 00:35:43,326 --> 00:35:46,057 Check! 631 00:35:48,099 --> 00:35:53,060 Oh, Marco. 632 00:35:54,574 --> 00:35:57,270 I just had the most amazing dream. 633 00:35:57,345 --> 00:35:58,903 I was... 634 00:35:58,981 --> 00:36:03,316 I was busting up a pallet of mercury vapor lamps, 635 00:36:03,386 --> 00:36:05,946 and all of a sudden, I could fly! 636 00:36:06,023 --> 00:36:08,150 And as I was soaring to great heights, 637 00:36:08,226 --> 00:36:11,253 I looked down, and I saw my grandma 638 00:36:11,331 --> 00:36:15,928 and my aunt and my father, and... 639 00:36:16,004 --> 00:36:20,408 they were being beaten by the police! 640 00:36:20,477 --> 00:36:22,240 Watch some telly, boo-boo. 641 00:36:22,312 --> 00:36:24,212 You'll soon forget it. 642 00:36:24,282 --> 00:36:25,647 Right. 643 00:36:29,990 --> 00:36:31,457 Oh, snap, look, Pixxi! 644 00:36:31,525 --> 00:36:33,117 It's me in my new video! 645 00:36:33,194 --> 00:36:37,723 There was a monkey that escaped from the zoo... 646 00:36:38,001 --> 00:36:41,403 Police swoop on downtown's homeless tonight. 647 00:36:41,472 --> 00:36:44,032 For the sixth night in succession, 648 00:36:44,109 --> 00:36:46,737 LAPD are seizing the propertyless 649 00:36:47,013 --> 00:36:50,313 and dumping them beyond the city limits. 650 00:36:50,385 --> 00:36:53,446 Swine flu at the National Kennel Club. 651 00:36:53,522 --> 00:36:54,682 Are these pups affected? 652 00:36:54,757 --> 00:36:57,625 Look how cute the puppies are! 653 00:36:57,694 --> 00:37:00,390 And did you see that neat old train 654 00:37:00,464 --> 00:37:02,329 under the bridge where them cops were? 655 00:37:02,401 --> 00:37:04,767 No, tell me about it... 656 00:37:05,038 --> 00:37:07,563 Two classic passenger cars, 657 00:37:07,641 --> 00:37:11,442 a caboose, and a black locomotive. 658 00:37:11,514 --> 00:37:15,315 What? 659 00:37:15,385 --> 00:37:16,682 That's it! 660 00:37:16,753 --> 00:37:18,414 That's the train. That's my train! 661 00:37:23,630 --> 00:37:26,725 1-900... what was the rest of the number? 662 00:37:26,801 --> 00:37:28,496 The rest of what, Pixxi? 663 00:37:28,570 --> 00:37:32,098 The number for the train that we found! 664 00:37:32,175 --> 00:37:35,043 1-900-LOST-TRAIN? 665 00:37:35,112 --> 00:37:36,443 Very funny. 666 00:37:36,514 --> 00:37:42,284 1-900... 667 00:37:42,355 --> 00:37:43,822 Hello. 668 00:37:44,092 --> 00:37:49,657 Hello. I found your train. 669 00:37:49,732 --> 00:37:51,256 - Are you there? - Uh-huh. 670 00:37:51,334 --> 00:37:53,234 I found your train, okay? 671 00:37:53,304 --> 00:37:55,204 Okay. Where is it? 672 00:37:57,543 --> 00:37:59,306 Wouldn't I be the silly one to tell you 673 00:37:59,378 --> 00:38:01,141 where your precious little train is? 674 00:38:01,215 --> 00:38:05,152 Not until I see the million buckeroonies, buckaroo! 675 00:38:05,220 --> 00:38:07,586 I see your current location as Santa Fe Avenue 676 00:38:07,656 --> 00:38:10,751 and the 7th Street Bridge in the City of Vernon. 677 00:38:10,827 --> 00:38:12,658 Do you still have the unit in sight? 678 00:38:12,730 --> 00:38:14,197 Fuck you! 679 00:38:14,266 --> 00:38:15,699 Give me my money first, or else I'II... 680 00:38:15,767 --> 00:38:17,701 Stop that, Pixxi, I can't be driving like that... 681 00:38:32,257 --> 00:38:33,383 Eggi, give me your phone! 682 00:38:33,459 --> 00:38:35,552 Can't... I'm trapped... 683 00:38:35,629 --> 00:38:37,859 Now! 684 00:38:37,931 --> 00:38:39,489 Okay... 685 00:38:39,567 --> 00:38:41,535 Come on! 686 00:38:45,308 --> 00:38:47,333 Where Pixxi? 687 00:38:53,686 --> 00:38:55,711 Senator Fletcher, well! 688 00:38:55,789 --> 00:38:57,689 It's a real pleasure to meet you, sir. 689 00:38:57,759 --> 00:39:01,457 I'm Nevada, on behalf of GrandioseSolutions. Com. 690 00:39:01,530 --> 00:39:03,225 And this is Giggli. 691 00:39:03,300 --> 00:39:05,359 If there's anything you should need during your trip, 692 00:39:05,436 --> 00:39:09,737 and I do mean anything, Senator, just call on either one of us. 693 00:39:09,808 --> 00:39:13,472 Well, I might just do that. 694 00:39:13,547 --> 00:39:14,673 Senator! 695 00:39:14,748 --> 00:39:16,739 Mr. Lorenzo. 696 00:39:16,818 --> 00:39:18,308 Welcome aboard, sir. 697 00:39:18,386 --> 00:39:20,547 Thank you. 698 00:39:20,623 --> 00:39:23,593 Pixxi, boo-boo! 699 00:39:23,660 --> 00:39:27,290 You've reached the Velvet Glove Acceptance Company. 700 00:39:27,366 --> 00:39:30,427 We're out right now, screwing some unfortunate. 701 00:39:30,503 --> 00:39:34,600 If you seek to be screwed by us as well, wait your turn. 702 00:39:34,675 --> 00:39:37,873 Aguas, listen... I found the train! 703 00:39:40,351 --> 00:39:42,979 Supreme Court Justice Espinoza and Mrs. Espinoza! 704 00:39:43,255 --> 00:39:45,951 I'm Nevada, from GrandioseSolutions. Com. 705 00:39:46,025 --> 00:39:47,458 It's a real pleasure to meet you. 706 00:39:47,526 --> 00:39:48,993 - Of course. - And this is Giggli. 707 00:39:49,263 --> 00:39:50,491 Welcome aboard! 708 00:39:50,564 --> 00:39:54,831 Ladies, thank you. There you go, honey. 709 00:39:54,903 --> 00:39:56,598 Reverend Duncan! 710 00:39:56,673 --> 00:39:59,301 It's a real pleasure to meet you. 711 00:39:59,377 --> 00:40:01,845 You can call me Sister Duncan. 712 00:40:01,912 --> 00:40:03,607 And what's your name, love? 713 00:40:03,682 --> 00:40:07,779 I'm Nevada, Sister, from GrandioseSolutions. Com. 714 00:40:07,855 --> 00:40:10,586 On board, Giggli will give you your welcome pack. 715 00:40:10,659 --> 00:40:12,320 Brother Lorenzo? 716 00:40:12,394 --> 00:40:14,021 Welcome aboard, sir. 717 00:40:15,498 --> 00:40:17,261 Brother Lorenzo. 718 00:40:19,003 --> 00:40:22,303 Sister Duncan! 719 00:40:22,374 --> 00:40:23,500 Brother Lorenzo. 720 00:40:23,575 --> 00:40:24,872 Watch your step. 721 00:40:24,944 --> 00:40:26,741 Oh, a mysterious envelope! 722 00:40:26,814 --> 00:40:27,974 Surely you don't think that I... 723 00:40:28,049 --> 00:40:29,676 No, no, no. 724 00:40:29,751 --> 00:40:31,878 Just a small gift from our sponsors, Sister Duncan. 725 00:40:31,954 --> 00:40:34,422 For your work with children. 726 00:40:34,491 --> 00:40:36,425 Oh! 727 00:40:36,493 --> 00:40:38,427 - Please. - Thank you. 728 00:40:38,496 --> 00:40:40,691 Welcome aboard! 729 00:40:52,115 --> 00:40:54,880 Damn it, Marco, Which one's mine? 730 00:40:54,952 --> 00:40:58,719 Look, Pixxi, red carpet! 731 00:40:58,790 --> 00:41:01,521 Hey! Coo-ee! 732 00:41:01,595 --> 00:41:02,687 May I help you? 733 00:41:02,763 --> 00:41:05,756 Yes, by getting out of my way. 734 00:41:05,834 --> 00:41:07,859 This train has been hired for a private excursion. 735 00:41:07,937 --> 00:41:10,839 Yes, I know. I'm on the guest list. 736 00:41:10,907 --> 00:41:12,738 Your name? 737 00:41:12,810 --> 00:41:16,941 Pixxi de la Chasse Obando y Bravo, of course. 738 00:41:17,015 --> 00:41:19,746 Well... you're not on the list. 739 00:41:19,819 --> 00:41:22,379 Hmm. Looks like I am! 740 00:41:22,456 --> 00:41:23,787 "Rikki Espinoza"... 741 00:41:23,859 --> 00:41:26,624 that's my pseudonym for all the parties. 742 00:41:26,696 --> 00:41:28,561 Nevada, this is Pixxi de la Chasse. 743 00:41:28,632 --> 00:41:30,827 She is in all the tabloids. 744 00:41:30,901 --> 00:41:34,065 Her family are, like, you know. 745 00:41:34,140 --> 00:41:35,835 - Really? - Yes. 746 00:41:35,908 --> 00:41:39,504 And this excursion would barely exist without me. 747 00:41:39,580 --> 00:41:41,878 Well, please. 748 00:41:41,949 --> 00:41:44,076 The rest of the guests are having a pre-brunch cocktail 749 00:41:44,153 --> 00:41:45,450 in the Observation Car... 750 00:41:45,522 --> 00:41:46,784 You're not on the list. 751 00:41:46,856 --> 00:41:48,585 If you'd like to join them, Pixxi... 752 00:41:48,659 --> 00:41:50,149 Oh, that's so sweet, and what's your name? 753 00:41:50,429 --> 00:41:52,056 My name is Giggli. 754 00:41:52,130 --> 00:41:53,893 Giggli, what a lovely name! 755 00:41:53,966 --> 00:41:55,661 Isn't it? My parents made it up. 756 00:41:55,736 --> 00:41:59,537 Very sweet. Coo-ee! 757 00:41:59,607 --> 00:42:02,406 He's with me. 758 00:42:24,908 --> 00:42:27,172 Miss Pixxi, and Mr. Marco, is it? 759 00:42:27,245 --> 00:42:28,837 Welcome aboard. 760 00:42:28,914 --> 00:42:32,476 I'm Lorenzo, your on-board service manager. 761 00:42:32,552 --> 00:42:33,985 May I fill your glass? 762 00:42:34,055 --> 00:42:38,857 Please... 763 00:42:38,927 --> 00:42:40,827 And we're off! 764 00:42:40,897 --> 00:42:43,457 GrandioseSolutions. Com is proud to organize 765 00:42:43,534 --> 00:42:45,627 this brief tour of the proposed route 766 00:42:45,704 --> 00:42:47,695 of the Arbogast Energy Corridor 767 00:42:47,773 --> 00:42:51,676 for VIPs, stakeholders, and opinion-formers. 768 00:42:51,745 --> 00:42:53,576 For the next few hours, 769 00:42:53,648 --> 00:42:56,777 as Grandiose Solutions' Luxor Parlor Train visits these sites, 770 00:42:56,852 --> 00:43:00,254 we'll be serving brunch, followed by lunch, 771 00:43:00,524 --> 00:43:06,522 a wine-tasting, and English country-house-style sandwiches. 772 00:43:06,599 --> 00:43:08,191 May we refill your glasses? 773 00:43:08,268 --> 00:43:11,670 Sure. 774 00:43:11,740 --> 00:43:14,208 I'll get back to you. 775 00:43:14,277 --> 00:43:15,869 What am I doing here, again? 776 00:43:15,945 --> 00:43:17,970 Visiting the proposed route for the Energy Corridor, 777 00:43:18,048 --> 00:43:19,913 Senator Fletcher. 778 00:43:19,984 --> 00:43:22,954 A half a mile wide, a thousand miles long, 779 00:43:23,022 --> 00:43:24,751 serving the L.A. Area 780 00:43:24,823 --> 00:43:27,691 with liquid natural gas from Coos Bay, Oregon, 781 00:43:27,762 --> 00:43:29,923 wind power from Canada, 782 00:43:29,997 --> 00:43:32,899 and heavy crude from the Alaskan Wildlife Refuge. 783 00:43:32,968 --> 00:43:34,936 Well, that's great. 784 00:43:35,004 --> 00:43:37,940 Only maybe I should have brought my hard hat. 785 00:43:41,614 --> 00:43:44,208 It will not be necessary to leave the train, Senator. 786 00:43:44,284 --> 00:43:47,311 We are just interested in your general impressions. 787 00:43:47,589 --> 00:43:50,889 You can view the proposed Energy Corridor 788 00:43:50,960 --> 00:43:54,089 from the comfort of your seat in the Observation, 789 00:43:54,164 --> 00:43:56,257 Dining Car, or Caboose. 790 00:43:56,334 --> 00:43:59,634 Not the Caboose, Giggli! 791 00:43:59,705 --> 00:44:01,969 Right! Not the Caboose... 792 00:44:02,041 --> 00:44:04,772 Why not the Caboose? 793 00:44:04,845 --> 00:44:07,781 Only maybe I should have brought my hard hat! 794 00:44:07,849 --> 00:44:09,908 These people are total fools. 795 00:44:09,986 --> 00:44:11,146 Who cares about them? 796 00:44:11,221 --> 00:44:12,984 How much money did he give you? 797 00:44:13,056 --> 00:44:17,585 I don't know. I haven't checked yet. 798 00:44:17,663 --> 00:44:20,792 Gimme. 799 00:44:44,800 --> 00:44:46,028 Ms. Espinoza? 800 00:44:46,101 --> 00:44:48,001 We're going to have some cocktails 801 00:44:48,071 --> 00:44:50,198 in the Observation Car. 802 00:44:55,214 --> 00:44:57,011 Wasn't it Billy Graham? 803 00:44:57,084 --> 00:45:01,715 No, I believe it was Pat Robertson who said 804 00:45:01,790 --> 00:45:07,253 that it was unrealistic and naive to be preoccupied 805 00:45:07,330 --> 00:45:09,389 with civil liberties and disarmament, 806 00:45:09,467 --> 00:45:11,094 as some of our politicians are. 807 00:45:11,170 --> 00:45:13,798 At a time when Western civilization 808 00:45:13,873 --> 00:45:15,932 is confronted by the extremist of threats. 809 00:45:16,010 --> 00:45:17,103 Yes! 810 00:45:17,179 --> 00:45:19,376 My sentiments also. 811 00:45:19,451 --> 00:45:22,856 I'll have another little splash of this. 812 00:45:22,925 --> 00:45:28,062 I see you like to go around with a pink plastic bullwhip. 813 00:45:28,137 --> 00:45:31,372 P.P.B. S are the new A.C.D.s. 814 00:45:31,444 --> 00:45:34,975 We are ready to begin serving brunch now in the Dining Car, 815 00:45:35,053 --> 00:45:36,784 one car down. 816 00:45:36,857 --> 00:45:38,120 Between meals, you are welcome 817 00:45:38,193 --> 00:45:39,958 to come hang out here in the Vista Dome, 818 00:45:40,030 --> 00:45:43,902 but do me a favor, folks, do not try and use the Caboose 819 00:45:43,973 --> 00:45:46,205 on the far side of the Dining Car. 820 00:45:46,278 --> 00:45:50,811 The Caboose remains closed as of this time. 821 00:45:50,889 --> 00:45:53,759 Brunch! 822 00:46:02,582 --> 00:46:03,845 Morning, Cap. 823 00:46:03,919 --> 00:46:05,786 Whoa, excuse me there. 824 00:46:07,493 --> 00:46:09,258 What a beautiful morning! 825 00:46:09,331 --> 00:46:11,301 It certainly is. 826 00:46:11,368 --> 00:46:16,003 It's the kind of morning which tempts one 827 00:46:16,079 --> 00:46:17,411 not to go inside that door. 828 00:46:17,482 --> 00:46:19,007 Ignore the messages. 829 00:46:19,086 --> 00:46:21,922 Pay no attention to the emails. 830 00:46:21,993 --> 00:46:23,826 And go fishing. 831 00:46:27,239 --> 00:46:30,177 Sherry from Manzanillo, Spain, 832 00:46:30,245 --> 00:46:32,181 a dry, refined taste 833 00:46:32,250 --> 00:46:34,847 to accompany the spectacular desert vistas 834 00:46:34,922 --> 00:46:38,123 we'll soon be enjoying. 835 00:46:49,990 --> 00:46:51,083 "El Monte. 836 00:46:51,159 --> 00:46:52,457 "Heading east. 837 00:46:52,529 --> 00:46:55,194 Follow me." 838 00:46:55,268 --> 00:46:56,429 I got the same text. 839 00:46:56,505 --> 00:46:59,102 Me too. Wonder who it's from? 840 00:46:59,177 --> 00:47:01,272 Pixxi's assistant. 841 00:47:07,062 --> 00:47:08,656 Mr. Lorenzo, 842 00:47:08,733 --> 00:47:12,697 this trip in this magnificent antique train, 843 00:47:12,976 --> 00:47:16,279 all this fine food, et cetera, 844 00:47:16,350 --> 00:47:20,553 it's costing somebody a few extra bucks, I'd say. 845 00:47:20,626 --> 00:47:23,029 Our clients are very interested in your 846 00:47:23,099 --> 00:47:25,126 and the other dignitaries' support, Senator. 847 00:47:25,204 --> 00:47:26,695 Really. 848 00:47:26,774 --> 00:47:31,409 Yeah, but what do any of us know about pipelines, damn it? 849 00:47:31,485 --> 00:47:38,764 There may be other issues you can help us with. 850 00:47:39,035 --> 00:47:43,238 You're a smart man, Lorenzo. 851 00:47:43,311 --> 00:47:45,440 I'm open for business any time. 852 00:47:45,517 --> 00:47:47,646 Senator. 853 00:48:16,186 --> 00:48:17,654 Pixxi checks out. 854 00:48:17,723 --> 00:48:20,627 Society heiress on day release from county jail. 855 00:48:20,697 --> 00:48:23,498 Father owned most of the Valley. 856 00:48:23,569 --> 00:48:27,510 He recently went bankrupt in some mysterious circumstances. 857 00:48:27,578 --> 00:48:29,878 What about the white rasta guy? 858 00:48:30,152 --> 00:48:34,560 Backup singer, dancer, grandson of some Eurotrash royalty. 859 00:48:34,628 --> 00:48:37,429 Any value as a U.S. Opinion-former? 860 00:48:37,501 --> 00:48:38,867 Negatory. 861 00:48:52,202 --> 00:48:53,865 Thirty-nine angry messages. 862 00:48:53,939 --> 00:48:55,602 First angry message. 863 00:48:55,676 --> 00:48:57,407 Hello, Mr. Gray? 864 00:48:57,480 --> 00:48:59,416 I'm really sorry to bother you again, 865 00:48:59,484 --> 00:49:01,853 but you're the only person I can think of who can help. 866 00:49:01,923 --> 00:49:03,620 You remember the furniture 867 00:49:03,694 --> 00:49:05,721 we were storing in our car after you repoed our house? 868 00:49:05,799 --> 00:49:07,632 Well, they just took our car away, 869 00:49:07,704 --> 00:49:09,799 and I was wondering if there's any way you could find out 870 00:49:09,874 --> 00:49:11,433 who got our car so I can go there 871 00:49:11,511 --> 00:49:13,538 and get our furniture back? 872 00:49:13,617 --> 00:49:15,348 The other guy said you all burned that stuff 873 00:49:15,420 --> 00:49:17,253 when you had a feast there in the Yard, 874 00:49:17,325 --> 00:49:20,958 but I said that didn't sound like you or like Mr. Aguas. 875 00:49:21,034 --> 00:49:23,437 Anyway, hope you're having a great day. 876 00:49:23,506 --> 00:49:25,943 Thanks again for the fifty dollars. 877 00:49:26,012 --> 00:49:30,819 Grandma really appreciated it, and my number is... 878 00:49:31,691 --> 00:49:35,461 Lord, for what we are about to receive, 879 00:49:35,533 --> 00:49:37,765 for what we have already received, 880 00:49:37,838 --> 00:49:42,907 and the wisdom to know the difference, thank you. 881 00:49:42,984 --> 00:49:44,851 - Amen. - Amen. 882 00:49:44,921 --> 00:49:46,948 Mr. Lorenzo, when can we expect to see 883 00:49:47,026 --> 00:49:48,962 this Energy Corridor of yours? 884 00:49:49,030 --> 00:49:50,727 I mean, here we are out in the desert and... 885 00:49:50,802 --> 00:49:54,071 Ah, the Arbogast Corridor, of course. 886 00:49:54,343 --> 00:49:57,510 You know, in the excitement, I forgot to mention it. 887 00:49:57,583 --> 00:50:01,615 Mr. Lorenzo, people worry about the silliest things. 888 00:50:01,693 --> 00:50:04,096 Aren't your sponsors concerned about the NIMBY factor? 889 00:50:04,366 --> 00:50:06,063 No. The law is the law. 890 00:50:06,136 --> 00:50:09,667 Those greens can quickly be put to other uses. 891 00:50:09,745 --> 00:50:11,510 Greens? 892 00:50:11,582 --> 00:50:14,486 Is this political? 893 00:50:14,555 --> 00:50:16,992 May as well tell 'em. 894 00:50:17,061 --> 00:50:18,928 What? 895 00:50:18,999 --> 00:50:21,562 Okay. 896 00:50:21,638 --> 00:50:26,513 There is another reason we invited you here... 897 00:50:26,582 --> 00:50:27,777 Yes, Mr. Lorenzo? 898 00:50:27,852 --> 00:50:30,688 And what would that be? 899 00:50:30,759 --> 00:50:34,665 The criminalization... 900 00:50:34,735 --> 00:50:36,432 of golf. 901 00:50:39,679 --> 00:50:40,738 Golf? 902 00:50:40,816 --> 00:50:42,045 Golf. 903 00:50:42,118 --> 00:50:45,785 The guys who took my car, Mr. Custer, 904 00:50:45,860 --> 00:50:50,131 evidently didn't know there was a box of kittens in the back... 905 00:50:50,204 --> 00:50:51,695 I'm on the train. 906 00:50:51,774 --> 00:50:54,439 And the sommelier is babbling about golf! 907 00:50:54,513 --> 00:50:56,210 Call me back on Eggi's phone ASAP. 908 00:50:56,485 --> 00:50:57,885 Aguas, Gray, Lola, what's up? 909 00:50:57,954 --> 00:51:00,015 Where did you go? Fishing or something? 910 00:51:03,501 --> 00:51:05,767 Aguas! 911 00:51:05,839 --> 00:51:07,239 Lola! 912 00:51:07,510 --> 00:51:11,211 "GONE GOLFIN"' 913 00:51:19,169 --> 00:51:21,071 Golf courses are a waste of precious 914 00:51:21,140 --> 00:51:23,976 agricultural and public land. 915 00:51:24,047 --> 00:51:26,610 They squander billions of gallons of water annually, 916 00:51:26,686 --> 00:51:29,556 while spreading innumerable poisons and insecticides 917 00:51:29,626 --> 00:51:31,289 into the environment. 918 00:51:31,564 --> 00:51:33,089 I enjoy a good game of golf. 919 00:51:33,167 --> 00:51:37,131 Me too. Two strikes. 920 00:51:37,210 --> 00:51:39,271 In the Third World, 921 00:51:39,348 --> 00:51:43,790 golf courses mean death to small indigenous communities. 922 00:51:43,858 --> 00:51:50,135 I know that as rational citizens and opinion-formers 923 00:51:50,206 --> 00:51:52,734 that you will join with me in the urgent call 924 00:51:52,813 --> 00:51:57,118 to have golf made illegal, both at home and abroad. 925 00:51:57,189 --> 00:52:02,155 Larry, boy, you're kidding, right? 926 00:52:02,234 --> 00:52:06,608 Scripture is explicit in its advocation of golf. 927 00:52:06,677 --> 00:52:10,641 Revelations 6:13. 928 00:52:12,391 --> 00:52:14,156 Yo, Gray! 929 00:52:14,228 --> 00:52:16,859 Where the dickens have you been? 930 00:52:16,933 --> 00:52:18,869 Okay, you're on the train, 931 00:52:18,938 --> 00:52:20,874 and it's headed back to the Union Station. 932 00:52:20,943 --> 00:52:22,036 Got that. I'll be there. 933 00:52:22,112 --> 00:52:24,275 What time's it due? 934 00:52:28,126 --> 00:52:29,925 Pixxi? 935 00:52:29,997 --> 00:52:31,124 Pixxi! 936 00:52:31,200 --> 00:52:35,038 Hello? 937 00:52:35,109 --> 00:52:37,706 Sit down, backup dancer! 938 00:52:37,781 --> 00:52:39,751 Ladies and gentlemen, 939 00:52:39,820 --> 00:52:43,225 since you have declined to join our righteous cause, 940 00:52:43,294 --> 00:52:45,731 I will be obliged to detain you. 941 00:52:45,799 --> 00:52:47,290 This will only be for a couple of hours. 942 00:52:47,369 --> 00:52:50,102 Then you will be at liberty, if all goes well. 943 00:52:50,176 --> 00:52:51,805 Cuff them, Giggli. 944 00:52:51,880 --> 00:52:53,405 This is terrorism! 945 00:52:53,484 --> 00:52:56,047 If you believe that to seek much-needed political change 946 00:52:56,123 --> 00:52:58,457 by radical means is terrorism, 947 00:52:58,529 --> 00:53:01,160 then our nation is a terror state. 948 00:53:01,235 --> 00:53:03,262 - Nonsense. - Can it, "Two Strikes." 949 00:53:03,340 --> 00:53:06,335 Now, each one of you has contributed in some way 950 00:53:06,413 --> 00:53:09,078 to the pernicious spread of golf. 951 00:53:09,153 --> 00:53:10,850 You, Senator Fletcher, 952 00:53:10,923 --> 00:53:12,517 have frequently sought to be photographed 953 00:53:12,795 --> 00:53:17,932 with golfing celebrities like Arnold Palmer and Tiger Woods. 954 00:53:18,006 --> 00:53:21,468 I... I... had to. There was no alternative. 955 00:53:21,548 --> 00:53:24,384 You, Pastor Duncan, married 2,000 Korean golfers 956 00:53:24,454 --> 00:53:28,360 in an on-course mass ceremony in Puchong. 957 00:53:28,430 --> 00:53:30,491 I don't recall. 958 00:53:30,568 --> 00:53:33,369 And you, Justice and Rikki Espinoza, 959 00:53:33,441 --> 00:53:35,274 built a complex of vacation homes 960 00:53:35,346 --> 00:53:37,578 at the golf resort of Boracay, 961 00:53:37,852 --> 00:53:39,913 with an 18-hole course 962 00:53:39,990 --> 00:53:43,828 that requires 800,000 gallons of water a day 963 00:53:43,899 --> 00:53:46,393 on an island that has no water! 964 00:53:50,447 --> 00:53:53,044 Hey, you don't need to handcuff me. 965 00:53:53,119 --> 00:53:54,553 - I hate golf. - You're just saying that. 966 00:53:54,623 --> 00:53:56,559 - No, I'm not. - Wait. 967 00:53:56,628 --> 00:53:58,495 She and her friends gave me a contribution 968 00:53:58,565 --> 00:54:02,061 when I was downtown collecting for the cause. 969 00:54:02,140 --> 00:54:03,574 That's right. 970 00:54:03,644 --> 00:54:05,876 I despise golf so much that when I was in high school, 971 00:54:05,949 --> 00:54:08,044 I used to get really high, go to the golf courses, 972 00:54:08,120 --> 00:54:10,056 and throw lighters and matches on it 973 00:54:10,125 --> 00:54:11,559 just to set it on fire. 974 00:54:11,628 --> 00:54:14,259 Don't trust her, Lorenzo. She's lying. 975 00:54:14,334 --> 00:54:15,893 Am not! 976 00:54:15,972 --> 00:54:17,406 Okay, fine. 977 00:54:19,646 --> 00:54:20,944 Show 'em, Marco. 978 00:54:21,016 --> 00:54:22,575 Yeah, mon! 979 00:54:28,600 --> 00:54:32,165 What is M.H.G.C.I.? 980 00:54:32,241 --> 00:54:36,307 Malibu High Golf Course Incendiaries. 981 00:54:51,352 --> 00:54:53,549 Hello. 982 00:54:53,624 --> 00:54:57,462 Found your train. 983 00:54:57,533 --> 00:54:59,298 Okay. Where is it? 984 00:54:59,370 --> 00:55:01,602 It's en route to a station in the Southland. 985 00:55:01,675 --> 00:55:04,579 I claim my million dollars. 986 00:55:04,649 --> 00:55:08,089 I see your current location as Wall Avenue and 112th Street 987 00:55:08,157 --> 00:55:10,218 in the city of Commerce. 988 00:55:10,295 --> 00:55:12,664 Do you still have the train in sight? 989 00:55:12,734 --> 00:55:15,068 Did I misspeak? 990 00:55:15,139 --> 00:55:16,573 Apologies, sir. 991 00:55:16,643 --> 00:55:18,738 Those million dollars, how about 'em? 992 00:55:18,815 --> 00:55:20,648 Now, see here, Mr. Custer, 993 00:55:20,718 --> 00:55:23,383 this is a national security matter, 994 00:55:23,459 --> 00:55:25,361 and you're obliged to tell us all you know 995 00:55:25,429 --> 00:55:27,661 about that unit right now! 996 00:55:31,110 --> 00:55:35,518 Why don't you kiss my sister's black cat's ass? 997 00:55:43,537 --> 00:55:46,806 Two calls from this vector in the last 48 minutes... 998 00:55:46,879 --> 00:55:49,316 the unit must be in this vicinity! 999 00:56:10,799 --> 00:56:14,466 Are you ready, Lorenzo? 1000 00:56:14,541 --> 00:56:20,282 Five, four, three, two, one, 1001 00:56:20,354 --> 00:56:22,586 and going live. 1002 00:56:28,440 --> 00:56:32,779 Do not attempt to adjust your television set. 1003 00:56:32,849 --> 00:56:35,753 We have taken control of all networks. 1004 00:56:35,823 --> 00:56:39,729 We have disabled all remote controls. 1005 00:56:39,798 --> 00:56:42,292 We instruct the president of the United States 1006 00:56:42,372 --> 00:56:46,313 to close all golf courses 1007 00:56:46,381 --> 00:56:49,912 and ban the corrupting practice of golf. 1008 00:56:49,988 --> 00:56:53,428 We further instruct that he and his colleagues 1009 00:56:53,497 --> 00:56:57,301 cease eating meat immediately. 1010 00:56:57,372 --> 00:56:59,638 If the president fails to do this, 1011 00:56:59,711 --> 00:57:02,808 within the next hour, 1012 00:57:02,885 --> 00:57:08,660 the city of Los Angeles will entirely be destroyed. 1013 00:57:08,731 --> 00:57:10,496 So there! 1014 00:57:10,569 --> 00:57:13,336 I told you not to switch the channels. 1015 00:57:13,408 --> 00:57:17,645 Right now we are aboard a train which, traveling at top speed, 1016 00:57:17,719 --> 00:57:23,892 will arrive at the Union Station in L.A. At 1900 hours. 1017 00:57:23,966 --> 00:57:29,468 We'd like to play a round or two, my friend. 1018 00:57:29,545 --> 00:57:34,784 Sign us up as temporary members. 1019 00:57:34,858 --> 00:57:35,917 I can't do that. 1020 00:57:35,993 --> 00:57:37,792 Come on, don't be a jerk. 1021 00:57:37,864 --> 00:57:40,859 All we want to do is hit some balls around. 1022 00:57:40,937 --> 00:57:42,804 The club is closed today, 1023 00:57:42,876 --> 00:57:45,848 and we're not accepting temporary members. 1024 00:57:45,916 --> 00:57:47,613 - Racist. - Sexist. 1025 00:57:47,686 --> 00:57:50,487 That really hurts me, guys. 1026 00:57:50,560 --> 00:57:54,125 You haven't got a clue as to what's going on here. 1027 00:57:54,201 --> 00:58:00,808 If any attempt is made to stop this train, we'll do the same. 1028 00:58:00,883 --> 00:58:02,819 Okay, wrap it up. 1029 00:58:10,638 --> 00:58:12,163 You missed out on a whole bunch of stuff 1030 00:58:12,242 --> 00:58:14,736 about the founding fathers and the freedom fighters! 1031 00:58:14,815 --> 00:58:16,181 Nevada saved your ass. 1032 00:58:16,252 --> 00:58:18,552 I couldn't concentrate. The Growler bombs... 1033 00:58:18,624 --> 00:58:20,856 Growler bombs? 1034 00:58:20,929 --> 00:58:22,831 You can't be serious. 1035 00:58:22,900 --> 00:58:23,959 These things take time! 1036 00:58:24,035 --> 00:58:26,905 Screw the long run, Senator! 1037 00:58:26,976 --> 00:58:29,812 This will get resolved today! 1038 00:58:29,883 --> 00:58:31,944 Why are we broadcasting out of the Caboose? 1039 00:58:32,021 --> 00:58:33,684 It's hotter than hell. 1040 00:58:33,758 --> 00:58:36,195 When you guys are done arguing, can I ask a question? 1041 00:58:36,264 --> 00:58:38,895 We are not arguing! 1042 00:58:38,970 --> 00:58:40,165 Don't ask them questions, Perky. 1043 00:58:40,239 --> 00:58:41,936 - You're provoking them. - Am not. 1044 00:58:42,010 --> 00:58:44,641 Yes, you are. Stop it. 1045 00:58:44,716 --> 00:58:47,050 Fuck you, Rikki. 1046 00:58:47,122 --> 00:58:51,154 So, Mr. Lorenzo, you were only bluffing 1047 00:58:51,231 --> 00:58:56,972 about blowing up this train, right? 1048 00:59:04,328 --> 00:59:07,164 You're certain they have Growlers on board, Professor? 1049 00:59:07,234 --> 00:59:09,899 As many as half a dozen. 1050 00:59:09,974 --> 00:59:13,277 CIA assured us all those Growlers were accounted for. 1051 00:59:13,349 --> 00:59:15,148 Except the ones in Mexico, 1052 00:59:15,219 --> 00:59:18,750 which we now know are secreted on that train. 1053 00:59:18,828 --> 00:59:21,800 We've run want ads for this missing train 1054 00:59:21,867 --> 00:59:24,133 in all the repo media, 1055 00:59:24,206 --> 00:59:26,199 made up old-style "Wanted" posters 1056 00:59:26,277 --> 00:59:29,078 offering a million dollars reward. 1057 00:59:29,151 --> 00:59:32,352 You got the reward money authorized, right? 1058 00:59:32,425 --> 00:59:34,258 Well? 1059 00:59:34,329 --> 00:59:37,358 Uh, you didn't, did you? 1060 00:59:37,436 --> 00:59:40,033 We're taking those crazies out. 1061 00:59:40,109 --> 00:59:41,874 Predator drone, sir? 1062 00:59:41,946 --> 00:59:43,677 Hello? 1063 00:59:43,750 --> 00:59:48,089 Hey, this is the guy who just gave the ultimatum on TV. 1064 00:59:48,161 --> 00:59:50,792 You were watching, right? 1065 00:59:50,866 --> 00:59:52,699 Go ahead. 1066 00:59:52,771 --> 00:59:56,142 Well, I just wanted to say that you're probably thinking, 1067 00:59:56,212 --> 00:59:59,777 take out the train now with a predator drone, right? 1068 00:59:59,854 --> 01:00:01,915 Well, do not try it. 1069 01:00:01,992 --> 01:00:04,828 Our Growlers are primed and ready to detonate 1070 01:00:04,898 --> 01:00:08,235 in the event of any attempt to stop us. 1071 01:00:08,307 --> 01:00:11,974 And in addition, we have five august dignitaries here 1072 01:00:12,049 --> 01:00:14,748 as guarantors of our security. 1073 01:00:14,821 --> 01:00:16,723 They are: 1074 01:00:16,793 --> 01:00:19,994 Supreme Court Justice Fabio Espinoza. 1075 01:00:20,067 --> 01:00:21,467 Rikki Espinoza, 1076 01:00:21,537 --> 01:00:25,307 Emeritus Director of Minority Rights Watch. 1077 01:00:25,379 --> 01:00:28,750 Sister Duncan, Universal Church of Life, City of Toil. 1078 01:00:28,820 --> 01:00:30,483 Thank you! 1079 01:00:30,557 --> 01:00:34,327 State Senator Fritz Fletcher, and I'd like to add my own... 1080 01:00:37,206 --> 01:00:38,469 Holla, I'm Pixxi. 1081 01:00:38,542 --> 01:00:41,982 Say your name properly. 1082 01:00:42,050 --> 01:00:44,886 Pixxi De La Chasse Obando y Bravo, 1083 01:00:44,957 --> 01:00:48,328 composer and performance artist. 1084 01:00:48,398 --> 01:00:50,561 And I be Marco. 1085 01:00:50,837 --> 01:00:53,103 You now know we are serious. 1086 01:00:53,175 --> 01:00:57,310 You have thirty minutes left. 1087 01:00:57,384 --> 01:00:59,251 Should we advise the president? 1088 01:00:59,323 --> 01:01:00,986 President is in Mongolia right now 1089 01:01:01,060 --> 01:01:04,089 attending a meeting of non-aligned ethanol producers. 1090 01:01:04,167 --> 01:01:05,499 He'll be asleep, for sure. 1091 01:01:05,570 --> 01:01:07,164 The vice president? 1092 01:01:07,241 --> 01:01:08,539 Also in Mongolia. 1093 01:01:08,611 --> 01:01:10,170 Neither of 'em's gonna ban golf. 1094 01:01:10,248 --> 01:01:12,115 Not in an election year. 1095 01:01:12,185 --> 01:01:14,986 The Reaper Drone it is, then. 1096 01:01:15,058 --> 01:01:16,549 Fishing, I understand. 1097 01:01:16,629 --> 01:01:23,042 It's relaxing, and sometimes you get a fish. 1098 01:01:23,110 --> 01:01:25,638 But this? 1099 01:01:25,917 --> 01:01:27,910 If this is what the upper echelons of society 1100 01:01:27,988 --> 01:01:29,183 do to enjoy themselves, 1101 01:01:29,257 --> 01:01:33,027 then the crisis is worse than I thought. 1102 01:01:46,096 --> 01:01:47,690 Marco, you batty-man! Marco! 1103 01:01:47,967 --> 01:01:49,094 Boo-boo, shut up! 1104 01:01:49,170 --> 01:01:50,399 No, I'm not gonna shut up! 1105 01:01:50,472 --> 01:01:52,066 How dare this asshole not include me 1106 01:01:52,142 --> 01:01:54,009 in his list of celebrity hostages? 1107 01:01:54,081 --> 01:01:56,313 My godfather is Prince! Prince! 1108 01:01:56,386 --> 01:01:58,583 I'm, like, the second-biggest celebrity here! 1109 01:01:58,658 --> 01:02:00,389 Are not! 1110 01:02:00,462 --> 01:02:03,629 Marco, you batty-man! Marco! 1111 01:02:03,702 --> 01:02:05,227 Hi. 1112 01:02:05,306 --> 01:02:08,369 Your goal, and tell me if I'm wrong, 1113 01:02:08,446 --> 01:02:13,253 is to abolish the golf courses, right? 1114 01:02:13,325 --> 01:02:15,123 Yes! 1115 01:02:15,194 --> 01:02:19,098 And to get the president and all his crew up there to go vegan. 1116 01:02:19,167 --> 01:02:21,602 You seriously expect our president 1117 01:02:21,670 --> 01:02:24,265 to become a vegetarian? 1118 01:02:24,342 --> 01:02:25,604 Vegan. 1119 01:02:25,677 --> 01:02:29,011 Yeah, and what do you call them, his, uh, his... 1120 01:02:29,083 --> 01:02:30,675 His staff? 1121 01:02:30,752 --> 01:02:32,687 His cabinets! 1122 01:02:32,755 --> 01:02:35,520 This is about climate change, too, you see. 1123 01:02:35,593 --> 01:02:37,653 I see. 1124 01:02:46,343 --> 01:02:49,177 Not my glasses! 1125 01:02:49,248 --> 01:02:51,444 Marco, Marco! Stop the train! 1126 01:02:51,518 --> 01:02:52,746 I can do that, Pixxi! 1127 01:02:52,821 --> 01:02:54,448 My black sheep uncle, Giancarlo, 1128 01:02:54,523 --> 01:02:56,617 used to be engineer on the Paris-Milano Express! 1129 01:02:56,693 --> 01:02:57,785 Many times, as a little boy... 1130 01:02:57,862 --> 01:02:59,261 Baby, baby, baby! Hurry! 1131 01:02:59,330 --> 01:03:01,697 Check! 1132 01:03:01,768 --> 01:03:03,235 Marco! 1133 01:03:07,543 --> 01:03:09,705 Marco is the hottest boy in the world, 1134 01:03:09,781 --> 01:03:12,751 and I am the hottest girl in the world. 1135 01:03:26,573 --> 01:03:27,699 Coo-ee! 1136 01:03:27,775 --> 01:03:30,404 Marco! Give us a smile! 1137 01:03:33,484 --> 01:03:34,576 This is Pixxi. 1138 01:03:34,653 --> 01:03:36,451 So, anyway. 1139 01:03:36,523 --> 01:03:38,184 Hello, Savage. 1140 01:03:41,564 --> 01:03:46,333 Beautiful, baby! 1141 01:03:46,405 --> 01:03:48,397 Eggi ordered one of those 3-D printers you like, 1142 01:03:48,475 --> 01:03:50,569 and it's coming on Tuesday! 1143 01:03:50,646 --> 01:03:51,738 Why didn't she overnight it? 1144 01:03:51,813 --> 01:03:53,611 I don't know, Pix. 1145 01:03:53,683 --> 01:03:54,775 Wait. 1146 01:03:54,852 --> 01:03:56,149 This is Pixxi. 1147 01:03:56,221 --> 01:03:58,190 Allo, Pixxi, love! 1148 01:03:58,257 --> 01:03:59,622 There is no engineer! 1149 01:03:59,693 --> 01:04:02,686 Somebody be runnin' this train remotely. 1150 01:04:02,765 --> 01:04:05,929 Maybe the Caboose! 1151 01:04:06,204 --> 01:04:08,503 You guys! Just get with it! 1152 01:04:48,270 --> 01:04:52,732 Shall we gather at the river, 1153 01:04:52,810 --> 01:04:58,410 the beautiful, the beautiful river, 1154 01:04:58,486 --> 01:05:03,391 gather with the saints at the river 1155 01:05:03,460 --> 01:05:09,993 that flows by the throne of God? 1156 01:05:19,385 --> 01:05:22,823 Sir, it may not be necessary to deploy the predator drone. 1157 01:05:22,892 --> 01:05:26,489 "It may not be necessary to blah, blah, blah." 1158 01:05:26,564 --> 01:05:28,054 Well, too bad for you, 1159 01:05:28,334 --> 01:05:31,668 because we're gonna deploy the predator drone! 1160 01:05:31,739 --> 01:05:34,436 And maybe even the Reaper Drone too! 1161 01:05:34,509 --> 01:05:38,504 I mean, what are you, some kind of Communist? 1162 01:05:38,583 --> 01:05:41,576 Yes, sir, as it happens, I am a Communist. 1163 01:05:41,655 --> 01:05:44,921 But I do not see how that's germane to this discussion. 1164 01:05:44,992 --> 01:05:50,729 You better leave this experiment immediately, you commie bastard. 1165 01:05:50,802 --> 01:05:54,706 Colonel! 1166 01:05:54,775 --> 01:05:58,713 For the record, sir, I, too, am a Communist. 1167 01:05:58,782 --> 01:05:59,908 What? 1168 01:05:59,983 --> 01:06:01,075 So am I, sir. 1169 01:06:01,152 --> 01:06:03,348 So are others here present. 1170 01:06:03,422 --> 01:06:04,821 We've come a long way, Colonel, 1171 01:06:04,891 --> 01:06:07,622 from the days when Communists were witch-hunted 1172 01:06:07,696 --> 01:06:11,464 or denied a role in the military or homeland security. 1173 01:06:11,535 --> 01:06:12,797 We Communists just believe 1174 01:06:12,871 --> 01:06:14,897 in a different political system, sir, 1175 01:06:14,974 --> 01:06:16,966 and in a more just society, 1176 01:06:17,043 --> 01:06:19,604 whose cornerstone is a safe and reliable 1177 01:06:19,681 --> 01:06:21,980 public transportation network. 1178 01:06:22,051 --> 01:06:25,614 Plus free universal health care. 1179 01:06:25,690 --> 01:06:29,389 Okay, Commies. Shoot! 1180 01:06:29,464 --> 01:06:32,866 Colonel, right now, this train is passing through 1181 01:06:32,936 --> 01:06:36,430 the busiest rail transportation corridor in the West. 1182 01:06:36,508 --> 01:06:38,100 Even one Growler blast 1183 01:06:38,178 --> 01:06:41,478 will put the entire system out of operation indefinitely. 1184 01:06:41,550 --> 01:06:45,010 Then comes the firestorm! 1185 01:06:52,099 --> 01:06:53,691 Hello? 1186 01:06:53,769 --> 01:06:57,502 They spoke to the president. Uh-huh. 1187 01:06:57,575 --> 01:06:59,567 Okay. 1188 01:06:59,644 --> 01:07:05,142 No, no, that's not negotiable. 1189 01:07:05,220 --> 01:07:08,622 Okay, yeah. 1190 01:07:08,693 --> 01:07:11,663 I'm just saying. 1191 01:07:11,730 --> 01:07:14,564 Well, you tell him! 1192 01:07:19,610 --> 01:07:21,511 The president said... okay, get this. 1193 01:07:21,579 --> 01:07:25,244 He said he's very open to banning golf 1194 01:07:25,519 --> 01:07:29,013 and that he personally is happy to go vegetarian immediately. 1195 01:07:29,091 --> 01:07:30,524 - Wait! - No! 1196 01:07:30,593 --> 01:07:31,787 But he can't speak for the Senate 1197 01:07:31,862 --> 01:07:33,022 or the House of Representatives. 1198 01:07:33,098 --> 01:07:34,224 Wait! No! 1199 01:07:34,300 --> 01:07:35,767 No! But... no. 1200 01:07:35,835 --> 01:07:37,029 No way. 1201 01:07:37,104 --> 01:07:38,230 Well, that's what I said, okay. 1202 01:07:38,306 --> 01:07:40,798 I said, it has to be all of them. 1203 01:07:40,876 --> 01:07:44,746 And he said he'll get the word out right away. 1204 01:07:44,816 --> 01:07:47,183 And is he going to call you back? 1205 01:07:47,253 --> 01:07:48,720 I guess so. 1206 01:07:48,789 --> 01:07:52,659 Who were you talking to? 1207 01:07:52,728 --> 01:07:54,218 I don't know! 1208 01:07:54,298 --> 01:07:56,529 Now stop asking me questions, Lorenzo! 1209 01:07:56,602 --> 01:07:57,899 You're freaking me out! 1210 01:07:57,970 --> 01:07:59,836 - Do you want my hankie? - What? 1211 01:07:59,907 --> 01:08:00,999 Do you want my hankie? 1212 01:08:01,075 --> 01:08:02,941 Is everything okay? 1213 01:08:03,011 --> 01:08:06,881 Sure. Yeah. 1214 01:08:06,952 --> 01:08:08,044 What's wrong? 1215 01:08:08,119 --> 01:08:11,248 Nothing's wrong. 1216 01:08:11,325 --> 01:08:15,058 I knew it would go like this! 1217 01:08:15,130 --> 01:08:20,298 We agreed to insist the president go totally vegan. 1218 01:08:20,372 --> 01:08:23,274 And it already got watered down. 1219 01:08:23,344 --> 01:08:29,308 Vegetarian and vegan aren't the same! 1220 01:08:29,387 --> 01:08:32,118 Solidarity, Giggli! 1221 01:08:32,191 --> 01:08:36,095 We're dealing in the art of the practical here. 1222 01:08:36,164 --> 01:08:39,100 Do you want my hankie? 1223 01:08:39,168 --> 01:08:42,867 Thank you! 1224 01:08:42,942 --> 01:08:45,912 Hello? 1225 01:08:45,979 --> 01:08:47,310 Okay. 1226 01:08:49,351 --> 01:08:51,252 Okay. 1227 01:08:53,959 --> 01:08:55,153 Okay. 1228 01:08:58,199 --> 01:09:00,168 I don't know about that. 1229 01:09:00,236 --> 01:09:04,368 What time? 1230 01:09:04,442 --> 01:09:06,411 Let me get back to you. 1231 01:09:14,458 --> 01:09:19,922 The president has agreed to everything. 1232 01:09:20,000 --> 01:09:23,164 Enabling legislation to ban golf 1233 01:09:23,238 --> 01:09:25,707 will be passed by midnight tonight. 1234 01:09:25,776 --> 01:09:28,769 That's 9:00 p.m. Our time. 1235 01:09:28,848 --> 01:09:30,281 All meat products will be pulled 1236 01:09:30,349 --> 01:09:33,342 from the Capitol Hill kitchens by that hour. 1237 01:09:37,027 --> 01:09:38,825 I'll tell the Doc. 1238 01:09:48,846 --> 01:09:51,782 - Hello. - Hello? 1239 01:09:51,851 --> 01:09:53,148 Anybody there? 1240 01:09:53,220 --> 01:09:54,414 Who is this? 1241 01:09:54,489 --> 01:09:56,047 Those terrorists you were talking to, 1242 01:09:56,125 --> 01:09:57,717 they may not be able to stop this train 1243 01:09:57,794 --> 01:10:00,423 because the locomotive hasn't got a driver! 1244 01:10:00,498 --> 01:10:02,831 Listen, I need you to immediately deploy a huge, 1245 01:10:02,902 --> 01:10:07,000 gigantic, airbag-type-thing between us and downtown! 1246 01:10:07,075 --> 01:10:09,067 Is this an official communication 1247 01:10:09,145 --> 01:10:10,305 from the terrorists? 1248 01:10:10,380 --> 01:10:13,441 No, you idiot. It's Pixxi! 1249 01:10:13,519 --> 01:10:15,385 Just do what I say! 1250 01:10:15,455 --> 01:10:17,150 - Pixxi. - Hello? 1251 01:10:17,224 --> 01:10:19,523 Neither Amtrak nor Union Pacific possesses 1252 01:10:19,795 --> 01:10:23,129 such a huge airbag technology that you suggest. 1253 01:10:23,200 --> 01:10:25,260 I mean, maybe we should, but we don't. 1254 01:10:25,337 --> 01:10:27,932 However, Pixxi, there is still a chance. 1255 01:10:28,008 --> 01:10:29,943 Right now, the pirates are following the route 1256 01:10:30,011 --> 01:10:31,946 of the Sunset Limited. 1257 01:10:32,015 --> 01:10:33,881 All lights and points are set in their favor 1258 01:10:33,951 --> 01:10:35,543 all the way to downtown. 1259 01:10:35,821 --> 01:10:37,482 But if you could switch the points 1260 01:10:37,557 --> 01:10:40,049 onto the old Mojave-Lancaster spur, 1261 01:10:40,127 --> 01:10:41,560 L.A. Can be saved! 1262 01:10:41,830 --> 01:10:43,354 That's a real chill notion, 1263 01:10:43,432 --> 01:10:45,230 but how would you like me to switch the points 1264 01:10:45,302 --> 01:10:47,828 if I'm on the train? 1265 01:10:55,184 --> 01:10:56,310 It's for you. 1266 01:10:56,386 --> 01:10:57,546 Thank you. 1267 01:10:57,622 --> 01:10:58,919 It's Pixxi. 1268 01:10:58,990 --> 01:11:00,548 Arizona Gray. 1269 01:11:00,626 --> 01:11:02,150 Backing you up at the Union Station. 1270 01:11:02,229 --> 01:11:03,321 Everything okay? 1271 01:11:03,397 --> 01:11:05,366 No, Gray, it's too late. 1272 01:11:05,434 --> 01:11:07,198 It's never too late, Pixxi. 1273 01:11:07,270 --> 01:11:09,171 No matter how large or complex the unit, 1274 01:11:09,240 --> 01:11:10,537 no matter how long the odds, 1275 01:11:10,609 --> 01:11:12,942 if there's a price, we can collect it! 1276 01:11:13,013 --> 01:11:14,879 Not in this instance. 1277 01:11:14,949 --> 01:11:17,441 Pixxi, you must succeed. 1278 01:11:17,519 --> 01:11:20,512 The example that you're setting to us all by doing so 1279 01:11:20,591 --> 01:11:22,252 is critical. 1280 01:11:22,327 --> 01:11:25,354 If you fail, mortgage defaults will continue to rise, 1281 01:11:25,432 --> 01:11:27,333 forcing more repossessions, 1282 01:11:27,402 --> 01:11:30,395 driving home prices down, causing more defaults. 1283 01:11:30,474 --> 01:11:33,035 Bailouts will cease to save us. 1284 01:11:33,111 --> 01:11:34,635 Bankers will stop making loans. 1285 01:11:34,914 --> 01:11:37,440 Businesses will fail, leading to rising unemployment, 1286 01:11:37,518 --> 01:11:40,010 zero credit, a worldwide recession, 1287 01:11:40,088 --> 01:11:45,084 and, thus, the end of the repo trade. 1288 01:11:45,163 --> 01:11:47,325 Okay, well, Gray, if we're to achieve this, 1289 01:11:47,401 --> 01:11:49,563 you have less than three minutes to get to Glendale, 1290 01:11:49,637 --> 01:11:51,229 throw the switch from downtown 1291 01:11:51,307 --> 01:11:52,968 to the old Lancaster-Mojave line. 1292 01:11:53,043 --> 01:11:54,442 Three minutes? From the Union Station? 1293 01:11:54,512 --> 01:11:55,638 That's impossible! 1294 01:11:55,714 --> 01:11:57,649 - No, it's not. - Yes, it is. 1295 01:11:57,717 --> 01:12:01,485 Well, just do it anyway. 1296 01:12:01,556 --> 01:12:03,114 Check. 1297 01:12:19,084 --> 01:12:21,610 And that's what the president said. 1298 01:12:21,688 --> 01:12:23,657 Doc, we're laughing. 1299 01:12:23,725 --> 01:12:25,717 In future years, instead of golf courses, 1300 01:12:25,995 --> 01:12:31,630 there'll be farms, allotments, parks named after us. 1301 01:12:31,704 --> 01:12:36,370 You spoke to the president? 1302 01:12:36,444 --> 01:12:38,036 No, no, it was all done via this guy. 1303 01:12:38,114 --> 01:12:39,308 You spoke to him too, right? 1304 01:12:39,383 --> 01:12:41,249 Yeah, a military guy. 1305 01:12:41,319 --> 01:12:43,618 He was on the level. 1306 01:13:00,383 --> 01:13:02,352 Drat! 1307 01:13:09,264 --> 01:13:12,132 May I ask who's calling? 1308 01:13:12,201 --> 01:13:13,759 Yo. 1309 01:13:13,837 --> 01:13:15,395 Gray? 1310 01:13:15,473 --> 01:13:17,237 Miss Pixxi? 1311 01:13:17,309 --> 01:13:19,073 Yeah, this be she. Who's this? 1312 01:13:19,145 --> 01:13:23,743 Miss Pixxi, this is Rogers, your father's manservant. 1313 01:13:23,820 --> 01:13:26,756 Rogers. What's up? 1314 01:13:26,825 --> 01:13:31,161 Miss Pixxi, what an opportune surprise. 1315 01:13:31,232 --> 01:13:35,728 I'm afraid your friend has suffered an attack of some kind, 1316 01:13:35,805 --> 01:13:38,274 laying him low. 1317 01:13:38,343 --> 01:13:41,541 Gray? Shit! 1318 01:13:41,615 --> 01:13:45,451 It appears he was just about to pull this lever 1319 01:13:45,521 --> 01:13:49,152 when his incapacitating stroke occurred. 1320 01:13:49,227 --> 01:13:51,093 Are you trackside? 1321 01:13:51,163 --> 01:13:53,257 Are you near that lever? 1322 01:13:53,334 --> 01:13:56,133 I am adjacent to it. 1323 01:13:56,204 --> 01:13:57,569 Rogers, I need you to pull that lever. 1324 01:13:57,640 --> 01:13:58,868 Pull the lever! 1325 01:13:59,143 --> 01:14:02,477 Miss Pixxi, I would love to be of service, 1326 01:14:02,548 --> 01:14:06,350 but my first duty is to your family. 1327 01:14:06,420 --> 01:14:14,160 Is there no way that you, your father, and your aunt 1328 01:14:14,233 --> 01:14:16,759 cannot be reconciled? 1329 01:14:16,837 --> 01:14:18,134 No. No way! 1330 01:14:18,206 --> 01:14:20,175 Tell them to go to hell! 1331 01:14:20,242 --> 01:14:21,300 I'm not talking to them. 1332 01:14:23,514 --> 01:14:28,283 Then I cannot assist. 1333 01:14:28,355 --> 01:14:32,657 All right, okay, okay. Okay, Rogers. 1334 01:14:32,729 --> 01:14:35,426 Pull that switch and put the swine on the phone. 1335 01:14:48,621 --> 01:14:52,559 Hey, Pops, how's it hanging? 1336 01:14:52,627 --> 01:14:54,653 It's Pixxi. 1337 01:15:00,373 --> 01:15:02,899 Mm-hmm, yeah, wow. 1338 01:15:02,977 --> 01:15:04,410 Anyway, how's Grandma? 1339 01:15:04,479 --> 01:15:06,345 Oh, that's terrible. 1340 01:15:08,953 --> 01:15:12,355 This president's spokesman, 1341 01:15:12,425 --> 01:15:14,951 what did he ask you to do? 1342 01:15:15,029 --> 01:15:16,326 Nothing. 1343 01:15:16,398 --> 01:15:17,490 Oh, just slow the train down 1344 01:15:17,567 --> 01:15:18,932 and bring it into Union Station 1345 01:15:19,003 --> 01:15:20,938 around 9:00 p.m. Instead of right away. 1346 01:15:21,006 --> 01:15:26,777 Right, that's when they're going to announce the legislation. 1347 01:15:26,848 --> 01:15:30,809 Well, we're not headed for Union Station. 1348 01:15:30,888 --> 01:15:32,583 What do you mean? 1349 01:15:32,658 --> 01:15:34,524 What? 1350 01:15:34,594 --> 01:15:37,291 They've switched us to another track. 1351 01:15:37,364 --> 01:15:39,856 We're on our way back to the desert. 1352 01:15:43,808 --> 01:15:47,337 Oh, phooey. 1353 01:15:47,414 --> 01:15:50,748 "WELCOME TO PALMDALE, HOME OF THE PREDATOR DRONE" 1354 01:16:01,770 --> 01:16:04,001 Nah. 1355 01:16:04,074 --> 01:16:07,374 Oh, Nevada, why not? 1356 01:16:07,446 --> 01:16:10,007 There's no point, really, in blowing up the desert, 1357 01:16:10,084 --> 01:16:11,642 a place of rare beauty 1358 01:16:11,720 --> 01:16:16,956 and an already endangered ecosystem. 1359 01:16:17,028 --> 01:16:18,894 Yeah. 1360 01:16:18,964 --> 01:16:22,458 They want to talk to our technical expert. 1361 01:16:22,536 --> 01:16:23,871 Hello? 1362 01:16:24,039 --> 01:16:27,373 Walter, is that you? 1363 01:16:27,444 --> 01:16:29,470 Willy? 1364 01:16:29,547 --> 01:16:31,573 It's been a long time. 1365 01:16:31,650 --> 01:16:34,779 Are you still working for the Pentagon? 1366 01:16:34,856 --> 01:16:38,088 Ja, ja, that's the general idea, Walter. 1367 01:16:38,161 --> 01:16:43,864 Unlike you, always collaborating with the Axis of Evil. 1368 01:16:43,936 --> 01:16:47,374 It is my disposition, 1369 01:16:47,442 --> 01:16:50,844 ever since Papa took us to the slaughterhouse. 1370 01:16:50,915 --> 01:16:52,576 I've been on the side of the weak 1371 01:16:52,651 --> 01:16:54,381 against the strong... 1372 01:16:54,454 --> 01:16:58,654 especially against Nazi lickspittles like you, brother. 1373 01:16:58,727 --> 01:17:00,388 Liar. Liar! 1374 01:17:00,463 --> 01:17:02,090 You were always a spoiled little brat, 1375 01:17:02,166 --> 01:17:05,831 and now you will die as a result of your own egotistical schemes. 1376 01:17:05,905 --> 01:17:07,931 Ah, fuck you. 1377 01:17:08,009 --> 01:17:09,773 No! No! Fuck you! 1378 01:17:09,845 --> 01:17:11,643 In thirty seconds, 1379 01:17:11,714 --> 01:17:15,743 my predator drones locked on that stupid broadcast antenna 1380 01:17:15,821 --> 01:17:20,192 on your Caboose will eradicate you! 1381 01:17:20,462 --> 01:17:24,457 Oh, Willy, pathetic little Willy. 1382 01:17:24,534 --> 01:17:29,496 It takes only takes me ten seconds to lower that antenna. 1383 01:17:29,576 --> 01:17:33,810 Your drones will miss their target. 1384 01:17:33,883 --> 01:17:35,043 Liar! Fool! 1385 01:17:35,117 --> 01:17:36,881 Idiot! You cannot escape me! 1386 01:17:36,954 --> 01:17:38,478 You don't even exist! 1387 01:17:38,556 --> 01:17:42,153 You're nothing but a tabletop expe... 1388 01:17:58,822 --> 01:18:02,760 How about dropping that antenna, Doc? 1389 01:18:02,829 --> 01:18:07,700 Remote control deactivated. 1390 01:18:07,770 --> 01:18:11,264 Here come the drones. 1391 01:18:18,787 --> 01:18:22,247 Gosh, Pixxi, you're so damn chill. 1392 01:18:22,326 --> 01:18:24,192 Thanks, Giggli. 1393 01:18:24,262 --> 01:18:26,891 I mean, look at them, it's pathetic! 1394 01:18:26,967 --> 01:18:30,769 And you're handling all of this so chilly. 1395 01:18:30,839 --> 01:18:34,207 Well, you know, it's like the Book of Bushido says, 1396 01:18:34,278 --> 01:18:36,747 by my friend the Dalai Lama, 1397 01:18:36,816 --> 01:18:38,580 "Always keep death in mind, 1398 01:18:38,652 --> 01:18:41,247 "and you won't fail to be attentive to your employer 1399 01:18:41,323 --> 01:18:43,292 or family duty." 1400 01:18:43,359 --> 01:18:46,625 Sick. 1401 01:18:46,698 --> 01:18:48,860 You know, I do regret one thing, though. 1402 01:18:48,935 --> 01:18:50,904 What, Pixxi? 1403 01:18:50,972 --> 01:18:53,635 Not having my 3-D printer. 1404 01:18:53,709 --> 01:18:58,774 Since we're about to die, 1405 01:18:58,850 --> 01:19:01,911 shall we hold hands? 1406 01:19:01,989 --> 01:19:04,754 Check, chiquita. 1407 01:19:07,732 --> 01:19:08,892 Thank you. 1408 01:19:18,849 --> 01:19:21,785 And after the train entered the tunnel, it was easy. 1409 01:19:21,854 --> 01:19:24,983 I was able to overpower my immediate captor 1410 01:19:25,059 --> 01:19:28,257 and free the other hostages. 1411 01:19:28,331 --> 01:19:31,358 All of whom rallied and came through at the eleventh hour. 1412 01:19:31,436 --> 01:19:35,306 In a spirited Caipura-based counterattack 1413 01:19:35,375 --> 01:19:37,867 on our dispirited kidnappers. 1414 01:19:37,945 --> 01:19:42,407 Who were no match for the ol' USA one-two! 1415 01:19:42,687 --> 01:19:45,782 And that, my friends, was that. 1416 01:19:45,858 --> 01:19:47,690 Praise the Lord! 1417 01:19:47,761 --> 01:19:51,255 What happened to these weapons of mass destruction, the WMDs? 1418 01:19:51,333 --> 01:19:56,136 All five backpack devices were safely accounted for 1419 01:19:56,208 --> 01:19:57,800 and have been returned to 1420 01:19:57,877 --> 01:20:03,978 the Center for Advanced Deactivation at Los Alamos. 1421 01:20:04,054 --> 01:20:05,886 What about the three terrorists? 1422 01:20:05,957 --> 01:20:07,424 Were their human rights respected 1423 01:20:07,493 --> 01:20:09,428 throughout this hectic process? 1424 01:20:09,496 --> 01:20:14,766 Well, as Emeritus Secretary for Terrorist Rights Watch, 1425 01:20:14,838 --> 01:20:18,867 let me give you an appropriate line of bullshit. 1426 01:20:18,944 --> 01:20:21,846 Coo-ee! 1427 01:20:24,987 --> 01:20:28,287 Three terrorists? I thought it was four. 1428 01:20:28,359 --> 01:20:33,230 The Mexican, those two cute little girls. 1429 01:20:33,300 --> 01:20:37,864 No, there was only three. 1430 01:20:37,941 --> 01:20:40,934 And six bombs. He said five. 1431 01:20:41,012 --> 01:20:43,914 Wonder where Gray is. 1432 01:20:47,489 --> 01:20:50,050 Who cares about Gray? 1433 01:20:56,003 --> 01:20:58,336 Oh, Aguas... 1434 01:21:41,942 --> 01:21:43,500 Hey, Gray. 1435 01:21:43,578 --> 01:21:45,979 Do you ever experience the feeling that 1436 01:21:46,048 --> 01:21:51,956 you might just be a tiny little simulacrum or an avatar 1437 01:21:52,025 --> 01:21:57,193 created by a mad scientist as part of a tabletop experiment? 1438 01:21:57,267 --> 01:22:01,535 Sure, I have that feeling from time to time. 1439 01:22:01,607 --> 01:22:04,372 And does that make a difference to you in your actions? 1440 01:22:04,444 --> 01:22:06,345 Wouldn't have it any other way. 1441 01:22:06,414 --> 01:22:08,349 Ah, here comes the bus. 1442 01:22:08,418 --> 01:22:10,319 Check! 101322

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