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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:34,520 --> 00:00:36,239 - Coach? - Yes, Frank. 2 00:00:36,640 --> 00:00:39,109 - Where do I go? - Proceed to the hub. 3 00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:41,040 Got ya. 4 00:01:22,840 --> 00:01:23,956 How will I know who he is? 5 00:01:24,400 --> 00:01:25,834 This is him. 6 00:01:29,760 --> 00:01:30,760 Hi. Oh. 7 00:01:32,680 --> 00:01:35,559 So... Sorry. Fork. - Amy. 8 00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:37,896 Oh, no. Me name's not fork. - Yeah, I guessed. It was just... 9 00:01:37,920 --> 00:01:38,990 Oh, it's... It's Frank. 10 00:01:39,080 --> 00:01:40,560 Uh, do you wanna sit? Shall we sit? 11 00:01:40,640 --> 00:01:43,160 - Think it's that or stand. - Yeah. Come... Come sit, yeah. 12 00:01:44,520 --> 00:01:46,751 Oh, oh, that's, um... I was on that side. 13 00:01:47,120 --> 00:01:48,256 - Oh shall I...? - Oh no, no. 14 00:01:48,280 --> 00:01:49,680 No. Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter. 15 00:01:51,600 --> 00:01:52,600 Why bring it up? 16 00:01:54,800 --> 00:01:56,951 Sorry, I'm... I'm so bloody nervous. It's... 17 00:01:57,760 --> 00:02:01,071 It's my first time on the, you know... With the... The system. 18 00:02:01,160 --> 00:02:02,160 Me too. 19 00:02:02,640 --> 00:02:04,279 Oh really? - Yeah, I'm shitting it, mate. 20 00:02:05,200 --> 00:02:07,635 Come to mention it, you do look terrified. - Do I? 21 00:02:07,720 --> 00:02:08,816 Yeah, you're quaking with fear. 22 00:02:08,840 --> 00:02:10,433 Or maybe shaking with revulsion? 23 00:02:10,520 --> 00:02:12,512 At least you've stopped shitting. 24 00:02:14,280 --> 00:02:15,280 Are you sure about that? 25 00:02:19,960 --> 00:02:22,096 Shall we stop talking about shitting? - Yeah, maybe order some food? 26 00:02:22,120 --> 00:02:23,400 - Mm. Yeah. - Yeah. Good plan. 27 00:02:23,800 --> 00:02:25,000 OK. - Do you know how we order? 28 00:02:25,640 --> 00:02:27,359 I think we use these. - Oh. 29 00:02:27,440 --> 00:02:29,352 Menu choice already established. 30 00:02:29,880 --> 00:02:31,712 - There you are, sir. - Oh. Ta. 31 00:02:31,800 --> 00:02:32,916 And for you, madam. 32 00:02:35,600 --> 00:02:39,037 Well, evidently, I'm a pasta girl. - Yeah. I'm a, uh... 33 00:02:40,480 --> 00:02:41,480 Fishcake... 34 00:02:47,160 --> 00:02:48,160 Mm. 35 00:02:48,480 --> 00:02:49,480 - Mm. - It's good. 36 00:02:49,600 --> 00:02:50,716 Mm. Can I try some? 37 00:02:51,440 --> 00:02:53,909 Are we allowed to do that? 38 00:02:59,320 --> 00:03:00,320 Fuck it. 39 00:03:00,520 --> 00:03:01,520 Yeah, fuck it. 40 00:03:04,320 --> 00:03:05,470 - Mm, that is good. - Mm. 41 00:03:12,160 --> 00:03:13,160 So... 42 00:03:14,200 --> 00:03:16,157 - We're both first timers. - Mm. 43 00:03:16,480 --> 00:03:19,075 Shall we check our expiry date? - Yeah. Good plan 44 00:03:19,160 --> 00:03:20,071 Yeah? 45 00:03:20,160 --> 00:03:24,313 Alright, um, so I think it's under "Info". 46 00:03:25,280 --> 00:03:26,555 Yeah. Uh, tap to reveal. 47 00:03:27,120 --> 00:03:29,589 We have to tap to reveal at the same time. 48 00:03:29,680 --> 00:03:32,514 OK, so, on three... 49 00:03:32,960 --> 00:03:34,758 two, one. Go. 50 00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:37,836 12 hours. 51 00:03:38,320 --> 00:03:39,320 Yeah, 12 hours. 52 00:03:40,760 --> 00:03:41,591 OK. 53 00:03:41,680 --> 00:03:43,000 A bit, um... - Yeah. 54 00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:44,919 A bit short. - It is a bit short. Isn't it? 55 00:03:45,000 --> 00:03:46,559 - Mm. - Oh, and getting shorter. 56 00:03:46,720 --> 00:03:49,918 I didn't realise it would sort of count down like that. 57 00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:51,195 It's sort of sad. 58 00:03:52,520 --> 00:03:53,880 Well, maybe we should eat quickly. 59 00:03:54,720 --> 00:03:56,837 Yeah. Yeah, maybe we should. 60 00:03:58,120 --> 00:03:59,120 The race is on. 61 00:04:02,680 --> 00:04:03,680 Come on, hurry up. 62 00:04:08,880 --> 00:04:12,271 - Well, guess this is us. - And this takes us to the place? 63 00:04:12,480 --> 00:04:13,480 Yeah, I suppose so. 64 00:04:14,240 --> 00:04:15,674 - After you. - Thank you. 65 00:04:58,880 --> 00:04:59,880 Oh, that's massive. 66 00:05:07,840 --> 00:05:09,115 - Here we are. - Yep. 67 00:05:12,680 --> 00:05:13,680 Huh. 68 00:05:22,760 --> 00:05:24,080 Do you wanna open it or shall I? 69 00:05:24,240 --> 00:05:26,596 - Go ahead. - Alright. 70 00:05:26,680 --> 00:05:27,680 Ha. Too slow. 71 00:05:28,440 --> 00:05:29,440 You're a knob. 72 00:05:36,520 --> 00:05:39,558 Oh, God. It's a shithole. 73 00:05:40,000 --> 00:05:42,117 You're kidding?! - I am, yeah. 74 00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:47,880 Ooh. 75 00:05:50,720 --> 00:05:51,720 It's nice. 76 00:05:52,080 --> 00:05:54,356 I, uh, like that lamp. 77 00:05:56,280 --> 00:05:59,000 Yeah, it's incredible, that lamp. - Fuck off. 78 00:06:00,120 --> 00:06:01,793 ♪ Dalia ♪ 79 00:06:02,880 --> 00:06:05,839 ♪ This girl's gonna move you... ♪ 80 00:06:11,480 --> 00:06:13,199 - Hm. - Right. 81 00:06:14,360 --> 00:06:15,360 That's, uh... 82 00:06:21,640 --> 00:06:22,676 There's an en suite. 83 00:06:25,240 --> 00:06:27,152 Shower or bath? - Both. 84 00:06:27,800 --> 00:06:28,950 Ah, that's good. 85 00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:32,271 Uh, well I'm... I'm just gonna use the loo. 86 00:06:32,360 --> 00:06:34,795 Oh yeah, I've gotta, uh... Over here, so... 87 00:06:35,400 --> 00:06:36,400 Yeah. 88 00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:46,593 OK, seriously, what are we meant to do? 89 00:06:47,200 --> 00:06:49,157 Query too broad, please narrow. 90 00:06:49,240 --> 00:06:53,029 Well, I mean, are we just meant to... I don't know, like, just go at it? 91 00:06:53,120 --> 00:06:54,873 Define "go at it". 92 00:06:54,960 --> 00:06:56,235 Oh, fucking hell. 93 00:06:56,960 --> 00:06:59,953 So, are we meant to just have sex with each other? 94 00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:03,479 Participants are not required to take any specific action. 95 00:07:03,680 --> 00:07:05,797 Yeah, but I mean, we can, right? 96 00:07:06,680 --> 00:07:08,751 I mean, people do, if it's just a short time? 97 00:07:09,280 --> 00:07:10,634 If that's your decision. 98 00:07:11,200 --> 00:07:12,759 - It's up to us? - It's up to you. 99 00:07:20,800 --> 00:07:21,800 I could just sleep here. 100 00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:25,276 Don't be daft. You'll be scrunched up in a ball. 101 00:07:33,400 --> 00:07:34,400 It's not awful. 102 00:07:36,360 --> 00:07:39,194 The bed's pretty big. I'm sure we could both fit in it. 103 00:07:39,440 --> 00:07:40,440 Yeah. OK. 104 00:07:45,200 --> 00:07:47,112 Must've been mental before the system. 105 00:07:49,160 --> 00:07:50,160 How do you mean? 106 00:07:50,920 --> 00:07:55,039 Well, people had to do the whole relationship thing themselves 107 00:07:56,080 --> 00:07:57,360 work out who they wanna be with. 108 00:07:57,560 --> 00:07:59,313 Hm. Option paralysis. 109 00:08:00,040 --> 00:08:02,360 So many choices, you end up not knowing which one you want. 110 00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:03,874 Yeah. Exactly. 111 00:08:03,960 --> 00:08:07,078 And if things seem shitty 112 00:08:08,120 --> 00:08:09,349 they'd have to figure out 113 00:08:09,440 --> 00:08:11,200 whether they wanted to break up with someone. 114 00:08:11,640 --> 00:08:13,950 How to break up with someone. Fucking hell. 115 00:08:14,040 --> 00:08:15,040 It's a nightmare. 116 00:08:15,320 --> 00:08:16,856 Yeah, it's not that when it's all mapped out. 117 00:08:16,880 --> 00:08:17,880 God no. 118 00:08:18,240 --> 00:08:20,516 It's so much simpler when it's all mapped out. 119 00:08:20,600 --> 00:08:21,600 Mm. 120 00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:26,957 This is weird though. - It really is. 121 00:09:16,440 --> 00:09:19,035 Well, then. - So... 122 00:09:20,080 --> 00:09:22,356 Thanks for being my first. 123 00:09:23,480 --> 00:09:24,709 Oh. 124 00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:27,000 Bloody time. 125 00:09:29,240 --> 00:09:31,709 It was great, you know. You... You were... nice. 126 00:09:32,600 --> 00:09:33,600 So are you. 127 00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:39,520 If we had this time again, you would totally get it, by the way. 128 00:09:40,840 --> 00:09:43,435 Oh, you... You bastard. - Sorry. 129 00:09:44,280 --> 00:09:47,114 You... You'd get it too. - Fucked that one up, didn't we? 130 00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:49,880 Yeah, totally. 131 00:10:15,640 --> 00:10:19,520 I guess I just don't see the point in something that short, like 12 hours. 132 00:10:20,040 --> 00:10:21,952 Even your reaction to a brief encounter 133 00:10:22,040 --> 00:10:24,236 provides the system with valuable information. 134 00:10:26,400 --> 00:10:29,871 Yeah, well, I didn't even do anything. The system thinks I'm a prude. 135 00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:31,992 The system makes no moral judgements. 136 00:10:32,200 --> 00:10:34,590 Yeah, but how do I know she wasn't the perfect match for me? 137 00:10:34,680 --> 00:10:35,591 I mean, she was... 138 00:10:35,680 --> 00:10:38,479 Your ultimate compatible other has not yet been selected. 139 00:10:38,560 --> 00:10:39,880 Yeah, I know but it's... 140 00:10:39,960 --> 00:10:42,759 The system gains insight as each participant progresses 141 00:10:42,840 --> 00:10:45,594 through numerous relationships and uses the gathered data 142 00:10:45,680 --> 00:10:48,275 to eventually select an ultimate compatible other. 143 00:10:48,360 --> 00:10:49,480 On your pairing day, I know. 144 00:10:50,280 --> 00:10:51,919 And it always finds your perfect match. 145 00:10:52,000 --> 00:10:54,151 In 99.8% of cases. 146 00:10:54,560 --> 00:10:56,950 But I have to go through loads of relationships to find it. 147 00:10:57,800 --> 00:10:59,678 - That is correct. - Great. 148 00:11:04,200 --> 00:11:06,840 - What was that? - Another relationship. 149 00:11:07,240 --> 00:11:08,276 What? Already? 150 00:11:09,960 --> 00:11:12,520 - What's this, another one? - That is correct. 151 00:11:14,200 --> 00:11:15,236 Best go get changed then. 152 00:11:25,160 --> 00:11:26,992 Holy fuck. Tell me that's him. 153 00:11:27,080 --> 00:11:30,118 I cannot confirm identity until a personal introduction is made. 154 00:11:33,320 --> 00:11:34,390 Hi. - Hi. 155 00:11:34,760 --> 00:11:35,830 Identity confirmed. 156 00:11:39,920 --> 00:11:41,718 I like your hair. - Yours is good too. 157 00:11:41,800 --> 00:11:42,800 It's all my own. 158 00:11:48,440 --> 00:11:49,874 It's just funny. 159 00:11:57,920 --> 00:11:58,920 Hi. 160 00:11:59,680 --> 00:12:00,680 I'm Frank. 161 00:12:02,000 --> 00:12:04,276 Mm, Nicola. 162 00:12:06,080 --> 00:12:07,992 I've been here a while. - Oh yeah, sorry. 163 00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:09,270 I was getting changed. 164 00:12:10,920 --> 00:12:13,480 Really? - Started already? 165 00:12:13,720 --> 00:12:14,720 I was hungry. 166 00:12:15,080 --> 00:12:16,799 Ah, yeah, course, yeah. Sorry. 167 00:12:21,120 --> 00:12:24,079 Come on, let's get it over with, checking the expiry. 168 00:12:25,280 --> 00:12:27,033 Ah, yeah, yeah. 169 00:12:35,440 --> 00:12:36,440 One year. 170 00:12:38,240 --> 00:12:39,600 We've got each other for one year. 171 00:12:40,240 --> 00:12:41,240 Could be a mistake. 172 00:12:41,320 --> 00:12:43,880 - Uh, Coach, is this a mistake? - This is not a mistake. 173 00:12:44,160 --> 00:12:45,435 Jesus fucking Christ. 174 00:12:46,880 --> 00:12:47,880 There'll be a reason. 175 00:13:01,720 --> 00:13:04,838 Look on the bright side, chicken tikka masala. 176 00:13:06,080 --> 00:13:07,080 What? 177 00:13:07,960 --> 00:13:08,960 Chicken tikka mas... 178 00:13:10,200 --> 00:13:11,236 It was a joke. 179 00:13:12,360 --> 00:13:15,432 Right. So you're the sort of person that makes jokes. 180 00:13:25,240 --> 00:13:26,560 OK, so on three... 181 00:13:26,640 --> 00:13:27,640 Two, one. 182 00:13:29,680 --> 00:13:30,680 Oh. 183 00:13:30,880 --> 00:13:31,880 Interesting. 184 00:13:35,280 --> 00:13:36,280 Nine months. 185 00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:38,595 Well... 186 00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:41,594 Cheers. - Cheers. 187 00:13:59,640 --> 00:14:01,120 Pretty much the same as my last one. 188 00:14:01,920 --> 00:14:04,719 How many of these have you had? - Relationships? So far? 189 00:14:05,280 --> 00:14:06,280 Five. 190 00:14:06,720 --> 00:14:07,949 I'm an old hand, I suppose. 191 00:14:12,840 --> 00:14:14,559 Listen, I'm just gonna jump in the shower. 192 00:14:14,800 --> 00:14:15,800 OK. 193 00:14:16,080 --> 00:14:17,080 Won't be long. 194 00:14:43,160 --> 00:14:45,197 - Hey. - Hi. 195 00:14:46,800 --> 00:14:49,998 So listen, if you're OK with it, this is relationship five for me 196 00:14:50,080 --> 00:14:52,549 and I've found it's best to have sex straightaway upfront. 197 00:14:54,920 --> 00:14:55,956 Right. Yeah. 198 00:14:56,040 --> 00:14:57,040 Kind of breaks the ice 199 00:14:57,120 --> 00:14:59,237 gives an early overview of compatibility and so on. 200 00:14:59,960 --> 00:15:00,960 Yep. 201 00:15:01,560 --> 00:15:03,472 So I'm consenting to everything now 202 00:15:03,960 --> 00:15:05,976 and whenever you feel comfortable with doing the same... 203 00:15:23,760 --> 00:15:24,830 Tikka masala, just... 204 00:15:26,160 --> 00:15:28,152 - What? - It's a bit tikka masala... 205 00:15:28,520 --> 00:15:30,910 - Oh, I'm sorry. - Talking makes it worse. 206 00:15:33,040 --> 00:15:34,110 It's rude. 207 00:15:34,360 --> 00:15:36,272 No, no. You're gonna have to do it from behind. 208 00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:38,320 - You what? - From behind. 209 00:15:56,640 --> 00:15:57,640 Bit faster? 210 00:16:05,880 --> 00:16:06,880 More motion. 211 00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:09,360 Yeah, not like that. More motion. 212 00:16:09,440 --> 00:16:10,440 You're all in-out, in-out 213 00:16:10,480 --> 00:16:12,856 like you're trying to shut a drawer back into a filing cabinet. 214 00:16:12,880 --> 00:16:14,314 - Sorry - It's just boring. 215 00:16:15,080 --> 00:16:17,390 Want a bit more side to side. 216 00:16:20,720 --> 00:16:21,720 Like this? 217 00:16:23,520 --> 00:16:24,715 No, not really. 218 00:16:31,720 --> 00:16:32,790 Aah 219 00:16:34,600 --> 00:16:35,716 Aah. 220 00:16:36,880 --> 00:16:39,270 What was that? - Nothing. 221 00:16:40,240 --> 00:16:41,240 Hm. 222 00:16:45,960 --> 00:16:46,960 Aah. 223 00:17:24,320 --> 00:17:25,320 Fucking hell. 224 00:17:26,720 --> 00:17:28,074 So I can't just walk away? 225 00:17:28,880 --> 00:17:29,880 That is correct. 226 00:17:30,760 --> 00:17:33,320 One day, it will provide you with the ultimate match. 227 00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:37,680 One day. 228 00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:39,560 One day. 229 00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:24,320 So I'd just like to say 230 00:18:24,920 --> 00:18:28,436 do have faith in the system because it does deliver. 231 00:18:28,960 --> 00:18:29,960 It did for us. 232 00:18:32,240 --> 00:18:34,596 You have so many experiences and then one day 233 00:18:34,800 --> 00:18:37,235 it pairs you up with your ultimate match 234 00:18:37,320 --> 00:18:38,800 the best in show, as it were. 235 00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:44,000 So, if you're having doubts 236 00:18:44,080 --> 00:18:45,753 just hang on in there. 237 00:18:45,920 --> 00:18:47,195 Because it really does work. 238 00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:08,600 Garlic dip? 239 00:19:09,320 --> 00:19:10,320 Thanks for that. 240 00:19:23,800 --> 00:19:25,154 Hi. Hi. 241 00:19:25,240 --> 00:19:26,720 Mm, you alright? 242 00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:28,070 Was that, uh, your... 243 00:19:29,040 --> 00:19:30,520 Yeah. Nicola. 244 00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:31,916 Oh, Nicola. 245 00:19:32,480 --> 00:19:33,480 Mm. 246 00:19:35,040 --> 00:19:36,440 You OK? 247 00:19:37,880 --> 00:19:39,792 No, you're not being... Are you being serious? 248 00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:42,310 Oh my God. OK, this is happening. OK, um, just... 249 00:19:45,800 --> 00:19:46,800 Oh, thanks. 250 00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:52,229 You look well. - Thanks. 251 00:19:52,320 --> 00:19:57,111 I'd, uh... I'd return the compliment, but you just spat food on my shoe, so... 252 00:19:57,280 --> 00:19:58,953 To be fair, it is a revolting shoe, so... 253 00:19:59,040 --> 00:20:00,456 Ah, all the better to kick you with. 254 00:20:03,440 --> 00:20:04,440 Is that really hard? 255 00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:08,194 Ouch. - I'm so sorry. Fuck. 256 00:20:11,560 --> 00:20:12,560 Shit. 257 00:20:13,800 --> 00:20:15,314 Oh, oh, um... 258 00:20:16,120 --> 00:20:19,192 Uh, Lenny this is, um, Frank. Frank, this is Lenny. 259 00:20:19,520 --> 00:20:20,715 Hi Lenny, you alright? - Hi. 260 00:20:21,360 --> 00:20:23,317 Uh, we were together for a... a bit. 261 00:20:24,040 --> 00:20:27,078 A small... Small bit. - Yeah, just before we... 262 00:20:27,440 --> 00:20:28,440 Oh, so you two...? 263 00:20:29,200 --> 00:20:30,429 Ah, that's... That's great. 264 00:20:30,640 --> 00:20:34,190 So, I mean... It looks like you two make a great, uh, team. 265 00:20:34,600 --> 00:20:35,600 Aah. 266 00:20:37,040 --> 00:20:38,040 Yeah. 267 00:20:46,480 --> 00:20:47,880 - Yeah. - Um, I'll see you. 268 00:20:48,120 --> 00:20:49,120 Yeah. 269 00:22:13,840 --> 00:22:14,910 Aah. 270 00:22:28,320 --> 00:22:29,320 Aah. 271 00:22:35,680 --> 00:22:37,034 You know that noise you make? 272 00:22:38,200 --> 00:22:39,200 What noise? 273 00:22:39,720 --> 00:22:40,720 Aah. 274 00:22:41,960 --> 00:22:45,237 Do I do that? - Yeah. You do. Quite often. 275 00:22:46,200 --> 00:22:47,200 Does it bother you? 276 00:22:48,560 --> 00:22:49,560 A bit, yeah. 277 00:22:52,520 --> 00:22:54,000 I'll try not to. - OK. 278 00:23:13,000 --> 00:23:14,000 Aah! 279 00:23:49,920 --> 00:23:51,559 So it's been great, really. 280 00:23:53,040 --> 00:23:54,040 Shame it has to end. 281 00:23:54,760 --> 00:23:55,760 But end it must. 282 00:23:57,320 --> 00:23:58,320 Anyway. 283 00:24:04,720 --> 00:24:05,720 OK, bye. 284 00:24:17,920 --> 00:24:19,320 Another partner already? 285 00:24:19,800 --> 00:24:20,800 That is correct. 286 00:24:36,720 --> 00:24:39,679 So, three, two, one, go. 287 00:24:41,400 --> 00:24:42,400 - Oh. - 36 hours. 288 00:24:51,720 --> 00:24:54,280 Well, uh, bye. - Bye. 289 00:24:55,040 --> 00:24:56,040 Bye. 290 00:25:03,440 --> 00:25:06,000 Three, two, one... 291 00:26:10,320 --> 00:26:11,549 Uh, I just wanna say. - Don't. 292 00:26:14,360 --> 00:26:17,273 Well, I learnt what it's like to co-habit with someone I despise. 293 00:26:18,000 --> 00:26:19,275 Is that useful for the system? 294 00:26:19,520 --> 00:26:21,193 Everything happens for a reason. 295 00:26:26,400 --> 00:26:27,629 That's sooner than I expected. 296 00:26:47,800 --> 00:26:49,519 - Hi. - Hi. 297 00:26:49,600 --> 00:26:50,600 Hi. 298 00:26:51,440 --> 00:26:52,440 Is this right? 299 00:26:53,000 --> 00:26:54,056 - Yeah. - I mean... 300 00:26:54,080 --> 00:26:54,957 Yeah, I didn't, uh... 301 00:26:55,040 --> 00:26:56,952 Didn't think the system would hook us up again. 302 00:26:57,040 --> 00:26:58,040 No, me neither. 303 00:26:58,520 --> 00:27:00,318 I mean, I hope it's right, obviously, but... 304 00:27:00,680 --> 00:27:02,160 Coach, are we sat at the right table? 305 00:27:02,360 --> 00:27:03,480 Yes. That is correct. 306 00:27:05,520 --> 00:27:06,520 OK. Well... 307 00:27:07,600 --> 00:27:10,354 Wait, um, can we not check the expiry date? 308 00:27:10,840 --> 00:27:12,559 Uh, why? - I'm just sick of it. 309 00:27:13,240 --> 00:27:15,550 Like the system's just bounced me from bloke to bloke 310 00:27:15,640 --> 00:27:17,518 like short fling after short fling. 311 00:27:17,600 --> 00:27:19,816 And I know that they're short flings, so they're just meaningless. 312 00:27:19,840 --> 00:27:22,674 And I get really detached. It's like I'm not really there. 313 00:27:22,760 --> 00:27:23,591 Yeah, yeah. 314 00:27:23,680 --> 00:27:25,496 OK, so, um, the other week, I was with this guy. 315 00:27:25,520 --> 00:27:27,216 God knows who. He was basically just a haircut. 316 00:27:27,240 --> 00:27:30,153 And I literally had this out of body experience 317 00:27:30,240 --> 00:27:33,278 like I wandered out of my body and I sat in this chair across the room 318 00:27:33,360 --> 00:27:35,431 and I just watched myself like fucking this guy. 319 00:27:35,520 --> 00:27:37,079 I was like, what is that all about? 320 00:27:37,160 --> 00:27:39,800 That is literally just a dick going in and out of a hole. 321 00:27:40,200 --> 00:27:41,475 Yeah. That's pretty detached. 322 00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:44,856 Well, it's like, when it's a long-term thing 323 00:27:44,880 --> 00:27:46,856 it's just as bad, you know, It's like watching the clock 324 00:27:46,880 --> 00:27:49,336 like you're a prisoner, counting the hours, counting the minutes. 325 00:27:49,360 --> 00:27:50,960 - Oh God, I have been there. - Yeah. 326 00:27:53,000 --> 00:27:54,559 Yeah, let's not check the expiry then. 327 00:27:55,280 --> 00:27:56,280 Yeah. 328 00:27:57,880 --> 00:27:58,880 It's a deal. - Deal. 329 00:28:01,280 --> 00:28:03,476 Bring on les fishcake. 330 00:28:04,600 --> 00:28:05,600 Dunno. 331 00:28:14,560 --> 00:28:16,472 So.. - So... 332 00:28:18,560 --> 00:28:19,630 Might as well. 333 00:28:20,480 --> 00:28:21,480 I suppose we have to. 334 00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:23,434 Don't know how much time we've got. 335 00:28:23,920 --> 00:28:25,195 Yeah, it could be ten minutes. 336 00:28:25,560 --> 00:28:26,960 Think you could last ten minutes? 337 00:28:27,160 --> 00:28:28,196 Fuck off. 338 00:28:31,440 --> 00:28:33,238 Right. OK, then. 339 00:28:36,720 --> 00:28:40,111 Wait, one of us should get undressed first. 340 00:28:41,000 --> 00:28:42,798 Why only one of us? - It'll be funny. 341 00:28:44,760 --> 00:28:48,197 Alright, then. Get your kit off. - No. No, it was my idea. 342 00:28:51,360 --> 00:28:52,360 Alright. 343 00:28:56,400 --> 00:28:58,039 You know, this is kind of emasculating. 344 00:28:58,120 --> 00:28:59,536 Well, then you better make up for it 345 00:28:59,560 --> 00:29:00,596 in a minute. 346 00:29:03,920 --> 00:29:06,560 I'm gonna see your dick. 347 00:29:07,600 --> 00:29:08,600 Sorry. 348 00:29:10,480 --> 00:29:12,790 - I'm gonna fucking see it. - Yeah, OK. Yeah. 349 00:29:47,840 --> 00:29:49,274 What if there is no scrutiny? 350 00:29:49,360 --> 00:29:51,477 It's just putting us together in any old order 351 00:29:51,560 --> 00:29:52,616 and we all go along with it 352 00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:54,836 cos they're always telling us how clever it is. 353 00:29:55,120 --> 00:29:56,873 Yeah, but it does put people with the one. 354 00:29:57,320 --> 00:29:59,357 It's got a 99.8% success rate. 355 00:29:59,840 --> 00:30:01,672 But how do you know they're perfect matches? 356 00:30:02,240 --> 00:30:05,836 I mean, what if all it's actually doing is gradually wearing us down. 357 00:30:06,520 --> 00:30:08,671 Putting us in one relationship after another 358 00:30:09,040 --> 00:30:11,430 for random durations in a random sequence. 359 00:30:11,520 --> 00:30:13,716 Each time you get a little bit more pliable 360 00:30:13,960 --> 00:30:15,189 a little bit more broken 361 00:30:15,440 --> 00:30:18,512 until eventually it coughs up the final offering 362 00:30:18,600 --> 00:30:19,795 and says that's the one. 363 00:30:20,200 --> 00:30:24,114 And by that point, you are so defeated and so exhausted 364 00:30:24,200 --> 00:30:25,793 that you just accept it. You settle. 365 00:30:27,200 --> 00:30:30,910 And then, you have to live the rest of your life 366 00:30:31,000 --> 00:30:32,798 convincing yourself you didn't. 367 00:30:34,920 --> 00:30:35,920 Well done. 368 00:30:36,040 --> 00:30:38,000 That's one of the bleakest things I've ever heard. 369 00:30:38,680 --> 00:30:39,680 Thank you. 370 00:30:42,280 --> 00:30:43,280 Right. 371 00:30:43,840 --> 00:30:44,990 D'you wanna know my theory? 372 00:30:45,880 --> 00:30:47,712 Let's assume the system isn't random, yeah? 373 00:30:47,960 --> 00:30:50,520 It's as sophisticated as they say it is. - OK. 374 00:30:50,800 --> 00:30:53,713 Right, so using these, it slurps up all your reactions, yeah? 375 00:30:53,800 --> 00:30:55,712 It builds up a complex profile. - Mm-Hm. 376 00:30:56,560 --> 00:31:01,191 Every crazy thought you've ever had, all your dreams and your weaknesses and... 377 00:31:01,280 --> 00:31:02,316 And your mad theories. 378 00:31:02,400 --> 00:31:04,336 - Yeah, like everything in your head. - Right. 379 00:31:04,360 --> 00:31:06,079 Right, so if it's everything in your head 380 00:31:07,240 --> 00:31:08,240 does it have thoughts? 381 00:31:08,480 --> 00:31:09,880 Alright, so now you're gonna say 382 00:31:10,280 --> 00:31:13,239 what if that's us and we're stuck in a simulation? 383 00:31:13,680 --> 00:31:14,680 Well, how do we know? 384 00:31:18,600 --> 00:31:19,600 I think that settles it. 385 00:31:20,280 --> 00:31:21,960 But I might've been programmed to go, "Ow". 386 00:31:22,320 --> 00:31:23,320 OK. 387 00:31:52,840 --> 00:31:54,240 - Hey, come here. - No. 388 00:32:36,520 --> 00:32:38,751 - Ow. - Sorry. 389 00:33:27,760 --> 00:33:29,399 - Coach? - Hello Frank. 390 00:33:32,920 --> 00:33:33,920 I've gotta know. 391 00:33:34,120 --> 00:33:35,554 What would you like to know? 392 00:33:37,520 --> 00:33:39,671 The expiry date for me and Amy. 393 00:33:40,440 --> 00:33:41,440 I need to know how long. 394 00:33:46,080 --> 00:33:47,720 What, you're not gonna talk me out of it? 395 00:33:47,800 --> 00:33:49,640 Would you like me to talk you out of it? 396 00:33:49,680 --> 00:33:52,798 Yeah. Uh... Uh, no. Dunno. 397 00:33:57,160 --> 00:33:58,833 Nah, I'm not gonna do it. Said I wouldn't. 398 00:33:59,920 --> 00:34:00,920 We shook on it. 399 00:34:16,240 --> 00:34:17,240 Fuck it. 400 00:34:32,360 --> 00:34:33,360 Recalibrating. 401 00:34:38,200 --> 00:34:39,200 Coach? 402 00:34:40,880 --> 00:34:43,315 - Coach? Coach, what's happening? - Recalibrating. 403 00:34:43,640 --> 00:34:45,154 Coach, it's getting shorter. 404 00:34:46,280 --> 00:34:49,239 One-sided observation has destabilised the expiry date. 405 00:34:50,000 --> 00:34:51,000 What? 406 00:34:51,040 --> 00:34:53,839 One side observation has de-stabilised the expiry date. 407 00:34:54,080 --> 00:34:55,080 Recalibrating. 408 00:34:55,880 --> 00:34:58,031 What? Cos I looked at it on my own, I made it shorter? 409 00:34:58,240 --> 00:34:59,959 - That is correct. - Why? 410 00:35:00,280 --> 00:35:01,953 Everything happens for a reason. 411 00:35:02,320 --> 00:35:04,357 Alright, well undo it then. Make it go back. 412 00:35:04,440 --> 00:35:05,794 I cannot do that. 413 00:35:05,880 --> 00:35:06,880 Recalibrating. 414 00:35:08,480 --> 00:35:09,960 What... What if she looks at it? 415 00:35:10,200 --> 00:35:12,669 Once shortened, the expiry date cannot be extended. 416 00:35:13,160 --> 00:35:15,436 - Why? - Everything happens for a reason. 417 00:35:16,200 --> 00:35:18,112 - Come on! Come on! - Recalibrating. 418 00:35:19,560 --> 00:35:20,560 When'll it stop? 419 00:35:21,080 --> 00:35:24,039 It will stabilise once recalibration is completed. 420 00:35:24,520 --> 00:35:25,590 No. Stop it. 421 00:35:26,440 --> 00:35:27,440 Stop it. Just... 422 00:36:12,600 --> 00:36:13,600 You OK? 423 00:36:14,200 --> 00:36:15,200 Yeah, I'm fine. 424 00:36:16,360 --> 00:36:17,510 - Alright. - I'm Good. 425 00:36:35,440 --> 00:36:37,750 Have you ever had more than four or less than four? 426 00:36:46,920 --> 00:36:47,956 What you thinking about? 427 00:36:50,360 --> 00:36:51,360 Nothing. 428 00:37:35,360 --> 00:37:36,635 Alright, seriously, what's up? 429 00:37:46,680 --> 00:37:49,275 - I looked. - Looked at what? 430 00:37:55,000 --> 00:37:56,753 We promised we wouldn't. We shook on it. 431 00:37:57,400 --> 00:37:59,240 - Don't you want to know what it said? - No. 432 00:37:59,680 --> 00:38:00,680 That was the point. 433 00:38:01,840 --> 00:38:04,036 Well, it's almost done anyway. - How, almost done? 434 00:38:05,360 --> 00:38:06,360 Got like an hour. 435 00:38:13,640 --> 00:38:15,393 Why... Why didn't you tell me this before? 436 00:38:17,640 --> 00:38:18,640 Didn't wanna spoil today. 437 00:38:18,720 --> 00:38:20,120 Oh, and this hasn't spoilt it? 438 00:38:20,200 --> 00:38:21,416 It was supposed to be five years 439 00:38:21,440 --> 00:38:22,440 but now... 440 00:38:24,040 --> 00:38:25,040 I looked at it. 441 00:38:25,120 --> 00:38:27,616 Something happened. It started going down. I don't know what it was. 442 00:38:27,640 --> 00:38:29,074 - So you broke it? - No. 443 00:38:29,160 --> 00:38:30,480 No. No, no, no. I mean... 444 00:38:31,160 --> 00:38:33,441 I don't... I don't know. - Why did you have to look at it? 445 00:38:34,080 --> 00:38:36,754 Look, I was thinking maybe we can overcome it somehow. 446 00:38:36,840 --> 00:38:38,433 Why did you have to look at it? 447 00:38:39,080 --> 00:38:40,080 Because I like you. 448 00:38:40,640 --> 00:38:43,075 Like properly, really. I like you and... - For fuck's sake. 449 00:38:43,160 --> 00:38:44,320 What? And that wasn't enough? 450 00:38:44,400 --> 00:38:45,800 No. Look, that's not the point. 451 00:38:46,400 --> 00:38:48,312 Right, I looked, but that's not the issue here. 452 00:38:48,440 --> 00:38:49,440 Are you sure about that? 453 00:38:49,680 --> 00:38:52,256 What the fuck? You're more wound up about that than how short the time is. 454 00:38:52,280 --> 00:38:54,272 Yes, because we had agreed. 455 00:38:54,640 --> 00:38:55,790 Listen. Listen. 456 00:38:56,600 --> 00:38:58,956 Listen. What if we just ignore it? - We can't. 457 00:38:59,400 --> 00:39:01,631 No, Listen, we just... We just fuck the system. 458 00:39:01,720 --> 00:39:03,256 Right? We'll fuck it... - What? And do what? 459 00:39:03,280 --> 00:39:05,795 We'll jump out, over the wall, get out. 460 00:39:05,880 --> 00:39:08,395 There is nothing out there. - How d'you...? How d'you know? 461 00:39:09,080 --> 00:39:10,080 How'd you know? 462 00:39:14,040 --> 00:39:15,315 Amy? - You've ruined this. 463 00:39:16,640 --> 00:39:17,640 You've ruined it. 464 00:39:20,320 --> 00:39:21,754 Hey, it's... It's nothing. 465 00:39:23,240 --> 00:39:24,390 - Amy? - Don't follow me. 466 00:39:25,440 --> 00:39:26,440 Amy, I'm sorry. 467 00:39:31,040 --> 00:39:32,040 Amy. 468 00:39:34,240 --> 00:39:35,913 Everything happens for a reason. 469 00:39:36,280 --> 00:39:37,280 What reason? 470 00:39:37,360 --> 00:39:39,096 The system will be assessing your reaction 471 00:39:39,120 --> 00:39:42,318 to the painful premature termination of a treasured relationship 472 00:39:43,240 --> 00:39:47,154 and will adjust and improve its profile of your eventual chosen one accordingly. 473 00:39:47,640 --> 00:39:49,552 - You're a great comfort. - Thank you. 474 00:39:56,200 --> 00:40:00,194 I swear to God, I feel like scaling the wall out there 475 00:40:00,280 --> 00:40:02,112 and jumping in the fucking wilderness. 476 00:40:02,480 --> 00:40:04,711 That would contravene the rules of the system. 477 00:40:05,160 --> 00:40:07,629 Oh, the fucking system. 478 00:40:09,760 --> 00:40:12,639 Failure to comply with the system may result in banishment. 479 00:40:13,080 --> 00:40:14,230 Alright, I know. 480 00:40:15,160 --> 00:40:18,232 Christ, will you let me angry, at least? Will you give me that? 481 00:40:20,680 --> 00:40:22,717 You must vacate your current living quarters 482 00:40:22,800 --> 00:40:24,075 when the time expires. 483 00:40:25,200 --> 00:40:26,200 Like I didn't know. 484 00:42:14,840 --> 00:42:17,514 And if I hadn't have looked, we'd have been together years. 485 00:42:18,560 --> 00:42:19,560 She was... 486 00:42:21,200 --> 00:42:23,795 You know, when you meet someone and you just know? 487 00:42:24,680 --> 00:42:26,000 You just know that... 488 00:42:26,920 --> 00:42:28,600 Reckon you could pop this in me now? 489 00:42:28,760 --> 00:42:29,760 I sort of got jaw ache. 490 00:42:30,440 --> 00:42:31,440 Yeah, come on. 491 00:42:31,920 --> 00:42:37,200 And after all that, he never even apologised. Not once. 492 00:42:38,960 --> 00:42:39,960 That's too bad. 493 00:42:43,680 --> 00:42:45,034 Do you mind if I think about her? 494 00:42:47,840 --> 00:42:48,956 If I can think about him? 495 00:42:50,160 --> 00:42:51,160 Yeah, sound. 496 00:43:04,600 --> 00:43:06,193 One, two, three, four. 497 00:43:13,520 --> 00:43:14,920 One, two, three, four. 498 00:43:32,760 --> 00:43:36,117 Congratulations, Amy. Your ultimate match has been identified. 499 00:43:36,440 --> 00:43:38,079 Your pairing day is tomorrow. 500 00:43:38,360 --> 00:43:39,476 Ultimate, as in the one? 501 00:43:39,720 --> 00:43:40,720 That is correct. 502 00:43:41,240 --> 00:43:42,356 And we meet tomorrow? 503 00:43:43,240 --> 00:43:44,240 That is correct. 504 00:43:45,520 --> 00:43:47,910 Tomorrow you will be coupled with your ultimate match 505 00:43:48,240 --> 00:43:50,232 and together, you will leave this place forever 506 00:43:51,400 --> 00:43:52,400 OK. 507 00:43:53,560 --> 00:43:55,472 Are you allowed to tell me anything about them? 508 00:43:55,880 --> 00:43:57,599 Do I know them already? 509 00:43:57,840 --> 00:43:58,840 Negative. 510 00:43:59,680 --> 00:44:00,680 Right. 511 00:44:00,760 --> 00:44:02,035 There is one more thing. 512 00:44:02,160 --> 00:44:03,160 Yeah, what's that? 513 00:44:03,640 --> 00:44:04,790 Prior to pairing day 514 00:44:04,880 --> 00:44:07,031 you have been allocated a short farewell period 515 00:44:07,120 --> 00:44:08,793 with an individual of your choosing. 516 00:44:08,960 --> 00:44:11,600 What... A farewell period, like I get to say goodbye to someone? 517 00:44:11,800 --> 00:44:12,800 That is correct. 518 00:44:13,360 --> 00:44:15,955 Data shows this can help provide psychological closure. 519 00:44:16,040 --> 00:44:17,190 Frank. I choose Frank. 520 00:44:18,440 --> 00:44:20,113 Your choice has been registered. 521 00:44:27,560 --> 00:44:30,632 Wait. Where are we meeting? Usual booth, 7:30pm. 522 00:44:31,480 --> 00:44:32,480 Alright. 523 00:44:36,000 --> 00:44:37,593 - Coach? - Yes, Amy? 524 00:44:38,360 --> 00:44:39,360 Count to four. 525 00:44:41,400 --> 00:44:43,357 One, two, three, four. 526 00:45:06,800 --> 00:45:07,950 Wait. Wait. 527 00:45:08,560 --> 00:45:09,560 How long we got? 528 00:45:17,320 --> 00:45:19,994 Look. The system set my pairing day for tomorrow. 529 00:45:20,080 --> 00:45:21,230 Yeah. Me too. - Right. 530 00:45:21,720 --> 00:45:24,633 I don't want whoever the system reckons the one is, OK? 531 00:45:25,360 --> 00:45:26,555 I want you. - I want you. 532 00:45:26,640 --> 00:45:28,518 Failure to comply with the system may... 533 00:45:28,600 --> 00:45:30,273 Ah, you can fuck off and all. 534 00:45:30,960 --> 00:45:33,156 Can you remember where you were before you came here? 535 00:45:35,560 --> 00:45:36,560 You can't, can you? 536 00:45:38,560 --> 00:45:39,560 - No. - Me neither. 537 00:45:40,080 --> 00:45:41,400 What? Why can't I think of that? 538 00:45:42,000 --> 00:45:43,000 It's a test. 539 00:45:43,320 --> 00:45:45,776 Do you... Do you remember the first night that we were together? 540 00:45:45,800 --> 00:45:47,440 I mean, the first night, how did you feel? 541 00:45:49,240 --> 00:45:52,472 I... I felt safe, happy, comfortable. 542 00:45:53,480 --> 00:45:54,675 It... It felt like... 543 00:45:54,760 --> 00:45:56,760 It felt like something locked into place, you know. 544 00:45:57,320 --> 00:45:58,754 Like we'd met before. 545 00:45:58,840 --> 00:46:00,816 Like it happened before, and like it'll happen again. 546 00:46:00,840 --> 00:46:03,719 Like it's happened a thousand times over and over again. 547 00:46:03,920 --> 00:46:06,640 Do you know what I mean? - Yeah. I... Yeah, I do. 548 00:46:07,320 --> 00:46:09,676 Ever since we've met, this world has been toying with us. 549 00:46:09,760 --> 00:46:10,955 It's trying to keep us apart. 550 00:46:11,040 --> 00:46:13,635 It's... It's a test. I swear it is. 551 00:46:13,720 --> 00:46:17,236 And the two of us rebelling together is something to do with passing it. 552 00:46:19,120 --> 00:46:20,120 We gotta fuck it all off. 553 00:46:21,280 --> 00:46:23,875 Exactly. We've just gotta fuck the whole thing off and go. 554 00:46:24,000 --> 00:46:25,000 Yeah, over the wall. 555 00:46:25,080 --> 00:46:26,992 Right over it, no matter what's out there. 556 00:46:27,280 --> 00:46:28,280 OK. 557 00:46:30,120 --> 00:46:31,120 So let's go. 558 00:46:34,600 --> 00:46:36,910 Yeah. Yeah, let's go. 559 00:48:06,920 --> 00:48:07,920 Come on. 560 00:49:42,080 --> 00:49:45,039 ♪ Burn down the disco ♪ 561 00:49:45,720 --> 00:49:48,554 ♪ Hang the blessed DJ ♪ 562 00:49:48,800 --> 00:49:52,191 ♪ Because the music that they constantly play ♪ 563 00:49:52,600 --> 00:49:56,071 ♪ It says nothing to me about my life ♪ 564 00:49:56,760 --> 00:49:59,719 ♪ Hang the blessed DJ ♪ 565 00:49:59,840 --> 00:50:02,992 ♪ Because the music they constantly play ♪ 566 00:50:03,640 --> 00:50:06,997 ♪ On the Leeds side streets that you slip down ♪ 567 00:50:07,720 --> 00:50:10,872 ♪ The provincial towns you jog round ♪ 568 00:50:11,040 --> 00:50:14,112 ♪ Hang the DJ, hang the DJ, hang the DJ ♪ 569 00:50:14,720 --> 00:50:18,316 ♪ Hang the DJ, hang the DJ, hang the DJ ♪ 570 00:50:18,480 --> 00:50:21,439 ♪ Hang the DJ, hang the DJ, hang the DJ ♪ 571 00:50:21,600 --> 00:50:25,150 ♪ Hang the DJ, hang the DJ ♪ 572 00:50:25,360 --> 00:50:28,717 ♪ Hang the DJ, hang the DJ ♪ 573 00:50:29,080 --> 00:50:32,357 ♪ Hang the DJ, hang the DJ, hang the DJ ♪ 574 00:50:32,680 --> 00:50:36,117 ♪ Hang the DJ, hang the DJ ♪ 575 00:50:36,400 --> 00:50:39,916 ♪ Hang the DJ, hang the DJ ♪ 576 00:50:40,160 --> 00:50:43,437 ♪ Hang the DJ, hang the DJ, hang the DJ ♪ 577 00:50:43,640 --> 00:50:46,599 ♪ Hang the DJ, hang the DJ ♪ 578 00:50:51,200 --> 00:50:54,591 ♪ Hang the DJ, hang the DJ, hang the DJ ♪ 579 00:50:54,880 --> 00:50:58,157 ♪ Hang the DJ, hang the DJ ♪ 580 00:50:58,560 --> 00:51:01,837 ♪ Hang the DJ, hang the DJ ♪ 581 00:51:02,240 --> 00:51:05,472 ♪ Hang the DJ, hang the DJ, hang the DJ ♪ 582 00:51:05,840 --> 00:51:09,197 ♪ Hang the DJ, hang the DJ ♪ 583 00:51:09,560 --> 00:51:12,997 ♪ Hang the DJ, hang the DJ ♪ 584 00:51:16,960 --> 00:51:20,271 ♪ Hang the DJ, hang the DJ, hang the DJ ♪ 585 00:51:20,560 --> 00:51:22,358 ♪ Hang the DJ. ♪ 41642

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